Sober Motivation: Sharing Sobriety Stories - Alcohol was going to cost Andy everything.

Episode Date: September 22, 2025

In this episode of the Sober Motivation Podcast, I sit down with Andy to discuss Andy's incredible journey to sobriety. We jump into Andy's childhood, his early relationship with alcohol, his struggles, and the moments that made him decide to seek help. Andy shares his experiences with the Sober Motivation community and highlights the positive changes that have come from his sobriety. This episode offers an honest and inspiring look at the challenges and changes of living a sober life. -------- Support the Show: https://buymeacoffee.com/sobermotivation The Sober Motivation Community: https://sobermotivation.mn.co/ Andy's IG: https://www.instagram.com/aaernie/

Welcome back to season four of the Super Motivation podcast. Join me, Brad, each week as my guests and I share incredible and powerful sobriety stories. We're here to show sobriety as possible, one story at a time. Let's go. In this episode of the podcast, I sit down with my buddy Andy. Andy and I discuss his incredible journey to sobriety. We jump into Andy's childhood, his early relationship with alcohol, his struggles, and the moments that made him decide to seek help.

Andy shares his experience with the sober motivation community and highlights the positive changes that have come from his sobriety. This episode offers an honest and inspiring look at the challenges and changes of living a sober life. And this is Andy's story on the sober motivation podcast. How's it going, everyone? This was a really cool episode for a few different reasons. When I used to work with people, I worked in a treatment center for six years and I worked in a few outpatient places as well at the hospital. a few other shelters and all kinds of stuff, all kinds of stuff helping people. And you used to be able to see people come and maybe months, six, four, five, six months

later you would see them leave and you would say, oh my gosh, you know, look at all of the progress you made and you could see it physically and you could see it emotionally and you could see it mentally for them of everything they changed and how everybody was so proud of them. But now that I'm not working in those places anymore, I don't get to see it like that. But this was a really cool thing because I remember when Andy jumped into the suburb motivation community and we had chatted a little bit before on the side. And to see where he's at now is incredible and I'm not going to spoil the story. But it is really cool to see the progress that really anybody can make. I mean, this is just Andy's story, but it's not just exclusive to Andy.

like Andy is the only person that can plug in and change his life. That's available for anybody. So that was really cool to kind of full circle moment in this virtual world kind of deal. Although Andy and I are going to meet this weekend actually, this coming weekend. We're having to meet up for the Suburmotivation community. We got 20 or so people heading to Toronto and we're going to hang out for the weekend. So I'm really excited for that. but if you would love to support the podcast, please check out Buy Meacofy.com slash sober motivation.

Any donations help. Everything goes right into supporting the podcast. The subscriptions and everything else that go into the mix, behind the scene stuff. Yeah. And if not, that's cool too. Thank you guys for listening. Now let's get the Andy story. Welcome back to another episode of the Sober Motivation podcast.

Got my buddy Andy with us. Andy, how are you? I'm doing well. Doing well. Thanks for having me. Yeah, of course, man. We've known each other since you've been on the Stober journey, so it's really good to have you. What was it like for you growing up? I had a pretty normal childhood. My parents were divorced. I was very young. I don't ever remember them even being married. But we lived, me and my brother, lived with my dad and my stepmom. And my mom was around, but we were with my dad during the week. And then on the weekends,

we'd go hang out with my mom. Yeah, pretty normal. I grew up playing sports, made it to high school. I didn't really, I wasn't really much of a partier. When I was younger, I remember my parents would drink a little bit. You know, my dad played softball and things like that, and they would have a couple beers and stuff afterwards, but nothing crazy.

My mom, she drank a little more than my dad, as far as what I saw. But even that wasn't anything too wild. My parents were young. my mom, my dad was 22 and my mom was only 20 when I was born. So they were young and things like that. So I remember even when we got a little bit older, I know like my dad and stepmom would go for margaritas and things with my buddy's parents

that they were friends with like we played football and stuff together so they would hang out. But never really anything crazy. I didn't see too much craziness growing up. And I was always too scared. I played football and I didn't want to. Not so much that I didn't want to. I just didn't want to go home and deal with the wrath, you know, if you got caught doing that kind of stuff. And so I was always at all the parties and things like that, Friday nights after games and stuff.

But very rarely, every once in a great while I would have a beer or two, but nothing. There was some kids that were getting wrecked. I never did that. I was always too paranoid. And I really didn't start drinking until I was of legal age. I turned 21. And I drink a little bit when I turned 21, nothing off the wall. But, you know, I'd go out to the bars and things like that.

I had Wednesday night, 50-cent draft nights and things like that I'd be in attendance for. But I had a job at 20. I started working in pharmaceuticals. So I had a – I know a lot of people when they're younger, they work in the restaurants and things like that. And I was working third shifts. And I think that kind of kept me on the same. straight and narrow for a little bit just because that's such a hard shift to work anyway, let alone when you're adding things like that into it.

Yeah. So yeah, that was kind of my childhood until up about, until I was 20, I started working there. And that's where I met my two best friends that I'm still best friends with them today. That's where I met those guys. We were all young kids. I was going to community college, but I liked going out. And then when I liked going out to the bar, so like classes were suffering. already and then at third shift on top of that and I just dropped out of college at that point

and started working full time in the factory and that was one of those 40 hours plus every other weekend so I didn't have a whole lot of a lot of time for school and all that with all the other extracurriculars I was starting to pick up yeah go yeah thanks for sharing all that going back too were you to start football player or did that that that kept you pretty busy in high school? Yeah, I always joke with my wife. I'm in the Hall of Fame. I told her that my jersey's up in the rafters. No, we were solid. We were okay. But no, I wasn't like super standout all conference or anything. But I did play football. I'm sorry, from the time I was, I think eight until the time I graduated high school. But it was one of those things, looking back at it now, they never tested anybody for

anything. But I was, like I said, not only did I not want to get in trouble with school. I just, I didn't want to get in trouble at home either. I'm like, and I don't know what would have happened, but I never got caught with anything like that, so I never had to find out. But that kept me pretty straight and narrow. We did have some kids that were at a party that got broken up and they got into some trouble, things like that.

So I just kind of stayed away from it. Yeah. So after high school, you get this job. You turn legal drinking age 21. Did you go out the day you turned 20? Did you go out and drink that? Yeah. Yeah, I did. And I started out my, I went out to dinner with my dad and stepmom. And the funniest thing is I still remember this. I waited 21 whole years to go out and get a drink.

And I was always very, I was always very paranoid. Like people would be like, oh, we should go. People would go ask people. And I'm like, no, I'm not going to do that. Or this store will let you buy. And I'm like, no. So I waited all this time. I ordered my first drink and the waiter doesn't even card me. And I'm like, dude, I guess it's my birthday. You have to ask me so I can flash my ID and show you that I'm legal now. Yeah, so we went out to dinner and then I went out with some buddies from work. We went out bar hopper and it was a pretty fun night. It was nothing too crazy.

Like I said, it wasn't really that big of a thing for me at that point. And then I, like I said, I met my two best friends. and we were all on third shift. We worked 11 to 7. And a few of the younger guys, my best friend at the time was married and he had a house and they had just split up.

So we would go over to his house in the morning a lot and hang out because it was just him. He was a couple years older than me. He was like 22, 23 and we're hanging out. And we just started to hang out. all the time and I eventually one day at work he was like anybody need to he goes

he asked me he goes do you know anyone that's looking for like a roommate because my wife's leaving and I'm like I'll move in because I was staying with my parents at the time I had moved out into an apartment with a girlfriend and we split up so I moved back home

and it was literally just that was the whole conversation and he's like yeah cool man show up next week whatever so I move in there and we're hanging out and we're drinking and it like kind of like I've heard you talk about before on the podcast I noticed that it was starting to help me out in a lot of ways I think growing up I don't know if I would say I was necessarily a people pleaser but I think I wanted everyone to like me I think I looking back at like high school and stuff like I cared too much about what everybody thought but you don't know that at the time

obviously I would do things a lot different if I knew how it would play out and but alcohol gave me like a confidence that I didn't have before I was always very shy about especially when it comes to meeting girls and things like that when you're 20-21 I didn't have a lot of the confidence and then when I would get drunk it was like I don't if you don't like me that's okay it worked out it's It actually worked out in my favor. And I also noticed that I could drink more than most people. And back then, it was like it almost made me cooler. Man, this dude can drink.

Yeah. And so probably around, I'd say, 22 or so is when I really started getting into it pretty solidly. And it was most days after work, the only days, realistically, the only days since I started drinking pretty heavily. that I didn't drink were just days when I was too hungover. I've never been able to do the hair of the dog. Like, I can put on a show for one night and then I need a day off before I can get the act back out there. I could never, I could hardly, unless the only time I could maybe go back to back is when I was young and had no kids and I could literally just sleep all day until the next night and then get going. But if I had to do anything or be anywhere, I could not.

do back to back. Yeah, we would have people over in the morning and then it was. Yeah. So this was, oh, so this was all in the morning. So you'd work that third shift, get off at 7, 7 a.m. And then that's when the party would start. Yeah. An interesting time, I think, for me anyway, and probably where you're sitting now to, for things to get going. It's funny because people, because people would be like, how do you drink at 7 in the morning? And we'd be like, it's 5 o'clock for us. We're just getting out of work trying to justify it that way. And we were so dumb. I was young.

I didn't have any kids. I didn't have anything going on. And it was like work was one of those places where the attendance policy was pretty lax. You could miss. We had it all down to a science back then. So we would call in here and there if we had too much fun and just felt like we couldn't go to work or whatever. So we'd call out a lot. And it really, at the time, I was like young 20s.

I didn't really care. I didn't plan on working there for very long. Fast forward, I was there for 20 years. And so it was funny because I never quit drinking, but the more I worked there longer and the more experience I got and I would apply for jobs and I wouldn't get them. And I would feel that I was more than qualified and they're just, they just have a problem with me. And then, but looking at it now, it's, dude, I wouldn't have given you that job either. You could. I can't, I couldn't have trusted myself.

I wasn't reliable. Did you always work the third shift for 20 years? No, I worked a variety. I worked every shift they had there. I think part of the reason I didn't drink so much when I first turned 21 was I was on the weekend crew. So I didn't start work till 7 o'clock on Friday night. Then we, but then we would work 312.

So I'd work Friday night, Saturday night, and Sunday night. and get out Monday morning, and then I was done until the next Friday. So we would go to the bar on Wednesday nights, and then Thursday night we found another bar. So I'd go out for those couple nights. And back then, like I said, everything was still pretty much all good. I had all good times. I didn't really drink.

I was drunk, but I didn't drink like I did after I really found my groove. and fell in there. And even still, most of the nights were good nights, but I did notice that I would, I was a lot more, like, the confidence didn't just stop with making friends and talking to people, but it would be like if something made me mad,

my best friend always laughs and he's, you're the drunk steward, because something would, somebody would, I don't know, bump into me, or it would be a complete accident. nothing you would think twice about sober and then two hours later I'm cussing that guy out and he has no idea what I'm talking about

because I've just been over here stewing getting pissed at him for bumping into me a thousand percent on accident so I started noticing things like that that I didn't necessarily like and I had a girlfriend who I was engaged to when I was probably 22, 23

I think I was 23, and we fought a lot, always surrounding drinking. And it was like my girlfriends throughout the years have all drank too, but I always drank the most. But it would be drunken fights. And when I was younger and I was a little more jealous and things like that that I've actually grown out of. It was still that lack of confidence, you know what I mean? they're too good for me and I was always like on guard for no reason and so it made for a lot of just dumb fights and I started costing me relationships but it didn't it wasn't anything that I

I didn't think it was that I just thought it was like hey we're young we fight a lot I'll when I get older I'll mature and it won't be like that I never blamed alcohol and nobody ever really told me it was alcohol because my my best friend and all the people are hanging out with were big drinkers and it's just yeah yeah and that's the thing too i think that's what we in one way or another that we surround ourselves with people that are in that same lane right that's convenient in that sense to it's in the early days for me everybody was just doing the same thing but you couldn't see it it was it just there wasn't people around me and it sounds like in your situation there too who just weren't leaning into alcohol a little bit more and a

little bit more. And then, yeah, you look back at all the stuff. And then I think for me, I just justified it, right? And like, I had people in my circle that would have worse situations. And I was like, it's a situation might not be the greatest, but come on. Look at X over there. It's much, much worse where they're at. And I felt like every time I would, after a rough night or I admit, I had my fair share of arguments and disagreements and everything with in relationships too. But yeah, I just, everybody, I felt like everybody I was hanging out with was pretty much the same going through the same stuff. And then I think we were just co-signed each other's bullshit a little bit, you know? I mean, we were young, right? I don't think anybody was like trying to be

malicious with it. I think it was just like, yeah, man, same thing goes. So we're all just going around in circles of, yeah, it's what we're all going through. We didn't necessarily have somebody else to say, maybe all of this isn't really part of, that happen over and over again. It sounds like one way or another similar thing. You don't know anything different or that there's other options. Yeah. Yeah.

And we would sober up and be like, all right, man, we really got to chill out. We're going to get our ass kicked one night or things like that. We would try and never drink less, but just behave better. And it's just, it's very funny.

And it just became everything we did. We would drink was. Yeah. It was what I thought I was and what. what I thought people expected from me was Andy's going to show up and Andy's going to drink and it's going to be a great time. And he's funny and he's the life of the party and it's always a good time with these guys and things like that.

And I just ran with it. I just ran with it for 20 years. Yeah. And it's interesting. You brought this up in a couple of different ways, too. The life of the party you mentioned earlier being celebrated for being able to drink the most or whatever it is. I remember that too,

especially for me. I felt like I was never accepted in life for so long. I feel like in high school, it was sports or it was academics. I wasn't good at sports. And the academics, I wasn't good at either. So I was like,

I'm trying to find my way. So I slipped into like maybe the third category, which was like just wildness, right? Just see if I can get attention that way or get acceptance that way. And like you mentioned, too, when you're going through this in high school, I sure as heck didn't have any insight to what was going on.

I was just, I think, craving for a place to belong. I didn't find it maybe the other two boxes, but I found it here. And I picked up on it really fast that I could connect with people, maybe gain, have them like me. If I was just took things a little bit too far, even if it was outside of my comfort zone or against my values or it just wasn't really who I was, let's just be a little bit crazy with all this stuff and maybe be the talk of the town for a little

bit and it sounds one way or another and then what you mentioned there as well this is how people expect you to show up and then this is our whole group so i'm just thinking of myself and my whole group and this is what people are expecting from me yeah yeah and i was the same way too i always was funny and like i did well in school but not too well it was it's weird i laugh now because like my oldest son's a senior and it's cool to be smart now when I was growing up it was like you wanted to be smart but not too smart because you don't want to be a nerd by any means you know what I mean so I've always got something smart to say and that's a blessing and a curse I've always said but I remember my math teacher telling my dad that if I thought if I worked on math as as much as I

thought about the next quick thing to say I probably have an A and that the class. And so yeah, I used a lot of humor. And when I was drinking, everything I thought, I would say. The filter was gone. The fear was gone. I would always think of these things, but I was always like, maybe they won't think it's funny. What if I say it? Nobody laughs. When I was drinking, I was like, fucking let a rip, dude, if they like it, if they don't, we'll just go have another drink and everything will be all good. That kind of worked in, too. And a lot of people I noticed, like I said, would want me around drinking and they were funny and things like that. Yeah.

It just gets baked into the identity that we have. How do things look moving forward from you? Up to this point, you're working this job and you moved in with your buddy there. How do things shape up after this? So I was living with my buddy and then I moved in with my girlfriend at the time when I was 23. We split up and he split up with his girlfriend right around the same time, like coincidentally, it wasn't a master plan. But I was like, hey, here we are again. I'm like, you need a roommate.

I need a place. So I moved back in. And then that's when the drinking really amped up. And that's when we became even closer than we were before. Like we were together all the time. And he had a different job now. He didn't work where I worked. So I was on third.

He was on first shift. And it just really amped up. We live in a pretty small town. And back then, probably like 2005-ish or so, we got our very own applebees in town. And it was like the only sit-down restaurant. Are you still in the same town that you grew up in? No, I grew up probably 10 minutes, 15 minutes south of where I live now, but right in the same area. Yeah, I've lived here my whole life other than I lived in North Carolina for a year and a half or so later in the story.

But like I said, we were young guys. We didn't cook, things like that. So we would always just go to Applebee's. And we were there most nights. Every night? Like most nights. Yeah. I would say out of seven, we were there at least four.

Yeah. What's your favorite dish at Applebee's? Or what was it? I used to always go for the, I like the boneless. They used to have like half off appetizers, so I would always get the boneless wings or the Parmesan shrimp steak was another go-to. If I was feeling a little rich that day. I mean, there's, there were days where we would cash out one bartender and have to pay the, other one again.

Like, we used to be like, yeah, we worked a shift. We're working a double today because we go there at noon and leave at eight. So you would drink on top of eating as well. Yeah. And then eat at the end of the night. When you look back at, when you look back at it now too, right? I mean, it's a chuckle and a half there. I think now where we sit in life, right?

We look back at sort of some of these things. But what do you think of it now about going there to Applebee's and with a drinking and stuff. Is there any insight or any thoughts about like why maybe all of that made sense at the time, if that makes even any sense? Yeah. And I think when it's always been my answer is just, that's just what we do. You know what I mean? That's just what I do. We go there, wherever we go. We're drinking. And it's, yeah. It was, there was just nothing that I didn't do without a drink if I could. You know what I mean? Yeah. At this point. Yeah, if it was outside of church and work.

And even, to be honest, there was some nights going into work that I'm like, man, I hope I don't get pulled over. We stayed up a little bit too late today. Yeah, that's just what we did. You go to dinner, you have a beer. You go to whatever. And it was, it's just. But even when you look at that too now, I had my things that I did that I look back at now. And I'm thinking, like, how did it get normalized?

in my life. You know what I mean? Where I'm like, okay, how did that become normalized? And alcohol was at the center of it. I feel like if I reflect back on times maybe like that in a sense, once alcohol came into the picture, I just maybe wasn't really just worried about anything else. As long as I could drink, it didn't matter if it was here or there or wherever it was. Yeah, no, that's absolutely right.

But it was any reason. too. It was Wednesday night, got nothing else to do. You know what I mean? Let's drink. And I had another buddy of mine. Dude, let's call in tonight and get drunk. Okay.

I was always up for anything. And I'm still usually up for most things depending on who's going to be there. But when I was drinking, you would find me in the most random places. I went to, the first concert I ever went to,

was Ozfest in Detroit. And that's not even my jam, but I was like, oh, let's go. And drink $8 beers all night at that time. And I remember it, but I, not like I should. And it was just anywhere I was there for the drink, you could say we were there to see the concert. I was just there to hang out and drink.

Or I think, like, I've heard people talk about Super Bowl parties, like for the game. And it's, no, we're just, I don't even remember the ending. We're just there to drink. And it got like that with everything. Like I said, If it was available and allowed, I would drink if I was there. Yeah.

How was like things outside of drinking, like mental health or how you were feeling about yourself or how you were feeling about where you were headed or did you have any goals? Like how was that outside of the drinking? How did that feel? Yeah, I struggled a lot at work trying to quote unquote prove myself. And looking back, like I said, I never did anything. realistically to help myself. Like, I was still hungover, two, three days a week at least, still taking time off, still.

And when you're going to work hungover, you're just not, you're just not doing your best work. It's impossible. So I found that I was just half-ass in a lot of things. But I wanted to be promoted and I wanted more experience and I wanted more challenging roles. but I could never get those. And like I said, looking back, it makes sense. Like, you can't be trusted. I actually out of the blue one day got a call from a guy on LinkedIn

who was a recruiter for this company in North Carolina, pharmaceuticals. And I'm sure pharmaceuticals are huge in North Carolina. There's just a ton of it. And so I talked with, I was with my son's mother at this time, and he was going into kindergarten the next school year. And we talked about it, and we decided that we'll go try it out. And this was like the best time to do it.

He's not already in school. He doesn't, nothing like that. So we moved down to Wilmington, North Carolina, which was awesome when it's right on the beach. And I did the whole, I'm going to start fresh, and they're going to see why they wanted me down here. And this company's going to regret the whole thing. It doesn't matter. At most places, if you leave, they'll just some. else will fill in for you, but I thought I was sticking it to him a little bit.

And so I moved down there by myself for the first six weeks because we had to pack up the house and my son was still in preschool. And I was down there and I was doing good, but there was nobody down there to monitor me. And I didn't know anybody. So I found the ABC store and kind of got right into it just by myself most nights. And you always seem to find a way like you find people like you. And I met a couple guys down there. And I love these guys too.

And we would, me and the one guy, he was from New York. And we're pretty tight. We still talk. We still talk. And I would go over to his house every once in a while. And we would drink like that. And he drank like I did. And so it was like the same shit.

I'm not doing good work, not feeling good at work, not performing like I had envisioned. when I took the job. And then there was a lot of, I got down there and it wasn't what they were off or, you know what I mean? They had basically bullshit had a lot of us to come down there. And then we didn't know there was a huge discrepancy in what they were paying us versus people that had already been working there. So that got out. And it was just really a shit show. And it really helped me to be more appreciative of the grass is not always greener.

Living in North Carolina was awesome. We lived like 10 minutes away from the beach, and that was fun, but it was, I was doing the same dumb shit, you know what I mean? And I just, I was starting to really not like how I was acting. I was doing things that were very out of character for me. And alcohol, like I said, I just, I just didn't give a shit. I didn't realize really how, any idea how selfish. I was when I was drinking. And then, so I lost that job.

They ended up cutting a lot of us out and things like that. And it was legit. It's the only time I've been fired. I've been fired once when I was 16 for giving away pizza, Little Caesars, but I deserve that one. This one was, I still don't feel like I deserved it. But it is what it is. But I took it kind of hard and I, like when I got, the day I got let go,

My son's mother came and got me and I said, I don't want to talk. I don't want to say anything. Just take me to the ABC store. And I proceeded to get just shit-faced and try and take in what just happened, even though looking back, that doesn't help. And it, I just, I think I, I don't know if I started drinking more then, but I know for a while there was definitely, I turned it up because I didn't, I didn't have anything. I didn't have a job. I didn't. I was waiting to get my unemployment to pay the bills and basically move back to Michigan.

For that time, I didn't have any. It was the first time. And since I was like 16 that I didn't have a job for extended period of time. It was very weird. Yeah. Interesting. We were laid on the Little Caesars, man. I got fired from Little Caesars as well.

Yeah. I used to be the quote unquote store manager at this Little Caesars. And when they fired me, a little quick story, when they fired me, I had a key to the store. But for whatever reason, that day, the key to the store, where e-break on a car, there's like a little gap there. The key fell down there. It was this huge ordeal, Andy. And they thought I was trying to keep the key and all of this stuff. But yeah, the Little Caesars, I was actually working there.

And I was not, I did it right. I wasn't terrible. But one time the owner came in through one of the pizzas. right at me in the metal pan. Yeah, the store was dirty and it was a little. There was more than that. It was not all him. It wasn't all me.

We were like 50-50. It just wasn't working out anymore. But when you say that too, as you go through this life, right? I mean, early 20s, mid-20s, you're leaning a lot into alcohol, right? And then I think when these things in life happen, that's all we know. And then it's like we get to that spot where it's okay. I'm not really happy with where I'm at. And I would love to maybe make changes, but that's all we know.

It's kind of like the only two in our bag. So we show up to the job site. All we have is the hammer. We don't have a drill. So we got to figure out how to make the hammer work for whatever, and we're probably going to make a bigger mess than we need to. And I think that's one of the things, too. As alcohol, for some, it might be overnight.

For others, it's slow. It's slow rolling, slowly creeps in to everything that's acceptable at first, right? When you turn 21, you go out to the bar, you have a few drinks with your folks or a drink, whatever it is, and then it slowly creeps in here to this part of your life, to that part of your life, to that part of your life. And then I think a lot of us, the timeframes are all different, but I think for a lot of people, we look back and we notice that we crossed a few bridges along the way of things we said we'll never drink there, drink that much or I'll take days off or it won't be during the week or hey if I get the new job come

on of course and you also mentioned to your son what was that like too with your son coming into your life yeah that's and like you've heard me in the meeting say too that's one of my biggest probably my biggest regret honestly is not quitting drinking when he was younger and And I still showed up to everything, but it was always hungover. He'd have basketball practice on a Saturday, and I'd be just miserable in the corner trying not to talk to anybody because I know I just smelled like captain. And so there was a lot of that. I regret that.

I was there for everything, but just physically. I wasn't mentally there for a lot of stuff. And even like when he got older, like football games and stuff and I would be watching, but I'd be like, man, I hope the game gets over so I can run to the store real quick. And when it's just like looking back at it now, it's like I wasted a lot of time trying to plan around that kind of shit when I should have just been enjoying watching him because he's a senior now. This might be his last season for football and wrestling and all that stuff. And I wish I would have. I regret having him around a lot of that stuff. And I wasn't the only one.

My buddies, they drink around their kids and things like that. So it still wasn't that weird to me because I had some of the friends that did it all. And it got really bad when, so we got back from North Carolina. And then, I don't know, we were back a few months. and me and my and his mother split up and so then it was and she worked restaurants so she was gone she worked mostly nights she when i say gone she was around but her schedule she worked nights so i had brady a lot with me especially in the early in the early days of our separation yeah and i was working third shift so for a while that kind of helped me

me because my mom would stay with him while I was at work and then I'd come home and go to bed so I could get up by the time he got out of school and things like that. It was just brutal. It's, I was older. I was probably, let me see, probably mid-30s, 33, 34-ish. And third shift gets harder, at least it did for me. It was when you're young, you can adapt better and go on less sleep and things like that. But the older I got it was just killing me. And then I just started after the first few months, my mom ended up moving in to help me take care of Brady. And that just led to my free reign. It was like, she's here. I was pissed. And it's crazy to think about, too, because I was dead broke. She left. I didn't probably because I was drunk, didn't see it coming.

probably in looking back on it i should have but i didn't and that was like a struggle i'm starting to get underwater with shit and having to work a lot of overtime and things like that to pay bills but it was like i always had money for captain and smokes i i couldn't i couldn't guarantee that i could pay the mortgage every month on time it was like a lot of juggling a lot of a lot of efficiency, I'll call it politely for her paying bills and a lot of creativity goes into that. But it was bad. And then luckily, I was single for over a year. And like realistically, I had no plans of ever even getting in another relationship.

It was just me and Brady. I used to always joke with him that he was going to go to the NFL and I was going to move around with him. And I was going to be like, I was just going to follow him around. And we were going to go, he was younger, we were going to pick up some chicks and just boys night and stuff like that. But I met my wife actually on a dating app that I wasn't even paying attention to. And I got a message. I got a message from her.

And I don't know if you've ever had the pleasure of being on the online dating apps, but they are interesting to say the least. What, like in what means who you get hold of or you go dates? Did you go on dates and stuff? Yeah, I went on a few. Nothing never really panned out. I have a couple friends that I'm still friends with them to this day. We went on a couple dates. And it was like it was early and in my being single. So we weren't in the same kind of place.

But I've met a few friends off there and then I met my wife on there. And funny, her mom was, her mom called her, I bet you two or three times on our date to make sure she wasn't in the trunk of my car and things like that. Where did you go? Applebee's? No, we had another restaurant at this time. We went to the old mill. there's an old mill brew pub in town. They make their own beer and things like that. We're on our way off. We've got a few restaurants now. Good.

But I met her and we went over to a friend's house to watch a college football game. Me and my friend are Notre Dame fans and her husband is a Michigan fan. I'm friends with him too. We're all good friends. And Michigan and Notre Dame were playing back to back. So one was at 3.30. One was a night game. And I was still drinking at this time, like openly.

And I went over there and I had a fifth vodka. And I had drank that by the time the first game was over. And I was like, oh, I got to go. And in my drunk brain, I was like, I'm being responsible right now. I'm going to ask, I'm going to ask her to run me to the store. And she's, no, I'm not taking you to the store. And I'm like, why? I was a whole other game.

And she's, that's a lot of, you just drank enough alcohol for the day. And I'm, and I was the same way as everybody. I'm like, you don't tell me, I know what I'm doing and blah, blah, blah. So that was like one of our first fights. And is the first date, the first night you met or, oh, okay, okay. We had been dating for a little while, but it wasn't very long. Yeah. Has that been, maybe I'm picking up on it here.

Maybe I'm picking up on it wrong. But has that been a consistent thing with relationships in your life? is whether you realize that at the time or not, maybe alcohol was hindering them a little bit or creating friction? Absolutely. And the other two serious relationships that I've been in, they both drank as well. So that didn't help either. And my wife, she's, we've been married seven years.

But I bet you I haven't seen her drink 10 drinks. She just doesn't do it. She'll have a margarita or two a year. And so for her, she was the first one. She's probably been the first one to be like, what you are doing is not normal. Yeah. I'm like, what are you talking about?

It's football Saturday. This is what we do. And she's, I'm telling you what you all do is not normal. And you have a problem. And I'm like, no, whatever, blah, blah. So it all culminated to, so my wife, when I met my wife, she used to do foster care. So she was married before and she did foster care because they couldn't get pregnant or whatever. So when she moved, she lived in Missouri for a while with her ex-husband and then she moved back to Michigan. And then we met a couple years later or whatever. And so she had started up doing foster care again. And we had two two-year-old boys, one of whom is my son that we adopted, my nine-year-old. So I've met him when he's.

he was two. And I was carrying, I don't know if it was after golf league. I was doing something where I had already done drinking. And then I met them for dinner and of course had another drink, which already didn't go swimmingly. Like we were already not going to have a good night. She was pissed and absolutely rightfully. I didn't need any more to drink. And I was carrying the kids into the house and we have three steps up the porch and I fell. I tripped carrying the kids and nobody got hurt but my knees. They were okay but she went not she went off on me as she should have and me being that drunk I responded with more anger and went off on her which was completely ridiculous.

So we had this huge blowout. We had just, God. we weren't even married very long and just a huge fight and that's when she was like I'm not going to be with you if you drink like this when was this like how many years ago is this probably I'd say at least probably gosh six years ago maybe five six years ago oh wow so it was a bit ago yeah yeah and yeah and I'll quit I'll quit and yeah and I quit for a bit but but But I started drinking, and that's when I started really hiding. Yeah.

How does that feel? Like, it was never like my personal experience. Obviously, I've heard people share about it, but how does it feel internally if you're aware of it? Is it, what is it, what's that process like? It's, it sucks, honestly, because you really have to, I'm trying to think how to word this, to go to those lengths to have a drink. And realistically, very few times that I drank could I even sit back and enjoy it? I would either enjoy it until they came home and then I would have to pretend like I wasn't drinking or

and then I'd wake up in the morning and be like, crap, where'd I put the bottle? Did I throw it away good enough? Did I, I don't know. And it's just such a circus to make it happen. that it's not, it was never worth it. And I knew that, but I just couldn't stop. It was still what people expected, what people thought it would. And I thought nobody would want to be around me if I wasn't drinking.

That's what I was known for. That's what people expect. And that's why I did it. And to start, it would be like events. Be a football game or there'd be some event going on and I would drink. We go to family Christmas and after she went to bed, I'd go with my brother and my cousins and we'd drink. But it was all in secret. Like I had to do all this elaborate planning and then hope to hell that nobody spilled the beans.

Yeah, but she must have known. Oh, yeah. Yeah, there was a few times. There was probably, I'd say four or five times where she caught me. and I would kind of make these promises and but realistically I would just be like I can't do that again. Yeah. Like I threw an empty bottle in the yard one time. Like I was going to take care of it later and I was hung over and they went outside and she found it.

And I was like, oh, shh. And then of course it's backpedaling into more lies. Yeah. Oh, no, that's old. I don't know how that got there. I don't know when that's been there. We used to have a lot of bullshit. And she knows that, but she's not stupid.

And I just, I laugh at how when you're drinking, you just think everybody's so dumb and you're so slick. Yeah. Do you ever look back at it and wonder to yourself, what about it seems so difficult when the people who loved you? And I'm sure you loved them as well, your family and your wife. And I don't know if there's anybody else in your life who ever mentioned. it to you. What was the big roadblock between saying or what was the fear that was keeping you from saying, you know what, why don't I just leave this behind? I think a lot of it was that it was my identity for so long. Who are you without it? That type of thing. And also, I didn't want to admit

that I couldn't control it. I didn't. That was the hardest thing for me. was to admit that I can't do this. I had this fantasy that I was going to have my last perfect night with alcohol. I was going to drink just the right amount, have just the right amount of fun, wake up feeling good, and then we were just going to part ways. It never, ever happens that way. And I would be in the shower before work, bitching myself out, how stupid I was, and why can't. But it was like I knew for probably 10 years that I needed to quit, but I just never did.

I didn't think any. I thought it was who I was. I needed to drink. That's why people wanted me around and things like that. So it was just, I just couldn't admit that. I couldn't picture my life without it because it had been so intertwined in everything that I did for so long. Yeah. Yeah, which when you reflect back.

on it too. Like it shows the madness of it all, you know, how you can't picture life without it. So where do things go for you from there? You kind of live in this secret life, drinking. I'm hearing that from you too, right? How can you enjoy? I remember when I had this phase of smoking cigarettes and I didn't want anybody else to notice when I'm sitting here smoking and then if they popped around the corner, like you can't even really enjoy what you're doing. And even if you have the time, you're going through all these different scenarios, right? So I can imagine that. that in a sense, right? But you feel like you need it. And then maybe you get those times with other people to connect and stuff. So that's where you're at. How do you keep this thing going?

And it sounds like your wife too is like looking for some change for this, probably knowing that you're going to have to quit or you should quit and be best if you quit. Yeah. And it was, alcohol was going to cost me this relationship too. There's no doubt about it. I think I've used all my nine lines as far as that goes. And then the last time that I got caught, I knew, I knew that I was like, you can't talk your way out of this. And I was so sick of trying. I was so sick of trying to keep shit straight.

And it's, I talked to my kids all day long about don't lie. Nobody likes people that lie. And I don't like people that lie. And here I am doing nothing but lying when it comes to that. And I was just, I've heard other people say it too, I was just sick of my own shit. Like I was just tired of it. I knew that I needed to do something. Yeah.

Because you had tried before, right? You had forced yourself into it. Come on. I think a lot of the initial conversation is, come on, Brad, smarten up. You got to do this. And I found your podcast. And like I said, I would listen to it. And I relate, I'm like, I relate to every one of them.

these people and they're all telling me it better without it. Yeah. Why is this not sticking with me? Yeah. I would be listening, your favorite, I would be listening. And then I would decide I was going to drink that night and I would just shut the podcast off because I had enough good advice for the day. And it's things like that just kill me.

I'm like, dude, you're listening and you're relating to all these stories. And I'm getting older and my health wasn't great and things like that. And it's like, none of that mattered until it mattered until this last time. Yeah. But it's like we always can convince ourselves that we're different. Hey, here's all these stories. Here's the way it ends up. Life is better without it.

It's so possible. None of us thought it would be possible. And here we are like that it's, it checks all those boxes. But I think that's the story that we can do. we can be really good at keeping alive. They're like, my life is different. Everything is different. And although there is the element of we've all taken different paths in life and had different

things happen, of course. But it's like the drinking site, the drinking thing, you've listened to a ton of the shows. I've done a ton of the interviews. I've been working with people for 14 years. I've got my own story. They're all different. They're all a lot the same. A lot the same.

The way that the stages take place. The new Charlie Sheen documentary breaks it down and I can't even remember exactly what it was, but it was like the drinking part, drinking with problems and then problems. Or you've done a good job sharing and I just think that's the way it goes for a lot of us. But yeah, you're listening to the show and it's, yeah, I would always go to meetings and hear stuff and stories and I would always leave when I wasn't really putting in the effort required to change my life. And I would say, yeah, that's great for John at the meeting. I'm glad he got things worked out.

It would never be my story. He's just stronger than I am. Or he just has more help than I do. Or he's smarter than I am. And when I look back, it really has nothing to do with those things. So you get caught for this last time. You listen to the show. Yeah, we always get a good laugh out of that.

Andy would turn off the show and he decided to, he was going to be drinking that night. So that's always an interesting thing. Hey, you're probably not alone with that. You're probably not alone with that, that too. But it's about picking up stuff here and there. It's just about checking. things out and I think it's a really cool element of the show because there's no pressure

to quit. If you do, huge, great. But nobody making you do anything so you can check it out. So you get caught up for this last time. What is that? What's that story? Oh, so my wife and kids, the younger kids, were with her sister. They went out to her sister's house. They stayed the night. My oldest son was with his mom, so it was just me. And so I grabbed some captain and it was just one of the rare times where I could actually enjoy it because nobody was around. And I don't know what happened. I don't know why, but I never threw the bottle away. And I never checked the next day when I was sitting there pretending not to be hung over and my nine-year-old comes in and he's just holding it and my heart sank.

like, fuck. And my, what is it? I'm like, oh, and I laugh because I said something like, well, I was cleaning out my car and I found that in there. She's like, from when? I'm like, I don't know. And she's stopped. And I'm like, that's when I was like, and just the look, and that's when I knew something was different. The look on their faces, my wife and my younger kids, they're three, six and nine. And I think the nine-year-old, he understands a little bit, the six-year-old maybe, but just the look on their face. And my wife's upset crying and then they're crying because she's crying and daddy made them cry.

And it just, I just was gutted. So I just, I came clean and it was uncomfortable. But I knew I was so tired of the shit. It's like that it just was such a weight lifted off my shoulders being able to talk to her and and just be honest and not have to work. about anything as far as keeping shit straight.

And I joined the community that day. And it's funny because I had, even while drinking, I would get annoyed with myself, and I would punch up the sober motivation and fill everything out and then cancel it. And then fill it all out and cancel it. And then, but I told her, I said, I'm going to join this community. I said, I need something. I need to do something, and I didn't know how it was going to go. I mean, a lot of it was to, a lot of me knew that I needed to check it out,

but there was a part of me that was like this whole smooth some things over a little bit, at least kind of get me back in the good graces. I didn't know how it was going to work out. It was a free month trial. I'm like, at the end of the day, if I don't end up joining, it didn't cost me anything, and I'll have gotten smoothed everything over by then. if I need to. But yeah, I haven't left.

I haven't left. Have you tried anything else prior to this, like any supports of any sort? Talk to anybody about, hey, this where things are at or no? No, not really. My wife had suggested AA, and I'm like, no way.

I'm not there. And like I've mentioned before, I just have, I have four kids. I have four sets of events, four sets of activities. In person is just not, ideal. And even if I have something going on with the kids, I can at least at a minimum listen.

Or a lot of times, I'll be working and catch a meeting. We'll just listen while I'm working, things like that. But yeah, virtual worked out. But no, I never tried anything. Yeah. I was just looking back at the first messages that we ever sent. Yeah. A Monday, February 17th. Yeah. Yeah, man. Pretty cool. Download the app. Yeah. I was a bit nervous, but really enjoyed it. I remember the first meeting you joined too, right?

And I think a lot of people join not only the suburb motivation community, but whatever it is, it's, is it really going to work? Maybe it's just to get people off my back. Maybe it's just to check things out. Who knows really when you join something or when you say yes to something. If it's actually going to work out, but if you don't say yes to it, you never, you're always left with what if. I think it was cool. And what I remember about you popping in there,

you shared on your first meeting, didn't you? And you shared a little bit of the story. Yeah. I didn't even know how to work it yet. And you were like, we, I popped on and you said something. And we talked and I thought I was the only, I thought it was just me and you.

Because I didn't have the whole camera view. So I'm just rambling on. And you're like, all right, I'm going to go ahead and mute you. And I'm like, oh, shit. So then I figured it out. And then I think I, you were, you called me. You were like, Andy, you're out, you're first on my screen, what's going on?

So then I shared. And yeah, I kind of, I think I was on like day two because it was a Wednesday night meeting. And I gave a little brief share. And, but yeah, and it was cool because it was the first time that I didn't feel alone. It was the first time that I realized there are people just like me who aren't the people under the bridge with the brown paper bag. These are successful people with families, and we all have this in common that we just, we can't control our alcohol. And I remember telling my wife right away, I'm like, this was awesome. And she was super pumped because I was in there and I was taking it serious.

And yeah, so it was, like I said, it was just, it was so refreshing because I think that's another thing that kept me stuck for so long was I didn't want to admit to anybody how bad it really was. I had what I show you and what I let you see of me drinking and things like that, but nobody knew how it really was, you know what I mean? So seeing people and hearing people from day one to year 43 and it's, man, this is like my, these are my people, you know what I mean? It was awesome. Yeah. Yeah. And yeah, it is so interesting because, yeah, we see in the Hollywood movies and stuff. I talk about a lot on the podcast about people that might be sure. struggling with alcohol and stuff will look like this and do that. And, you know, I mean, that is the reality for some.

But I think there's a much bigger category of people out there too who you could have a room of 100 people and say, hey, pick me out to people who are struggling with alcohol. You'd have no idea. You have no idea. It's just same as everybody else. Because that becomes a skill, survival skill. I think that we have to learn to pick up when we struggle with. substances for as long as we can. Eventually, if you stick around long enough, it's really hard

to keep it together. But for some time, the survival skill is a secret, the hiding and everything because of the shame element. We don't want to feel that or the guilt or have people say, what's wrong with you? Why can't you control your alcohol? You don't want anybody to say that. So it's like we just go inward. We just isolate. And then it's like, things can, I did my best drink alone. I hated that towards the end. I hated it. I was annoyed by other people. They would say, do you want to go out? We used to go out all the time. No, I have known. I don't want to go out. Are you kidding me? Like one, it's too expensive. And the disfilling the drinks just way too slow. And you guys want to talk too much. I just want to drink. I don't want to talk. No more talking.

This drink put something mind numbing on the TV and just let me melt into the couch or whatever. occasionally I would go out and hang out and do that stuff but it wasn't my it wasn't at all my favorite thing to do so you jump in there man it's this different experience for you right are you in your wife pumped up for you right you're checking out something at least and it is really interesting to me because not everybody has that experience that you had not everybody connects you were hanging out in the beginning on every meeting almost right or maybe you were on everyone yeah i there was a long time where I was on every meeting we could, every meeting we had. And I still, and it got me through.

There was a lot of times, especially in the early first couple weeks, first couple months. But it was also helping because I could talk to my wife about it and let her know if I was struggling or whatever. And she's the best support system in the world, but she doesn't understand. So that's where the meetings were so nice because I could talk to her, tell her how I was feeling, and then I could come to these meetings and talk to people who get it. And it just felt liberating, really, to just let it flow and just tell people like, today sucked.

I wanted to drink, but I didn't. And then that was also like a sense of pride. Like I know that I could have a slip. I know that people have slips all the time and the community would welcome. me back, but it's, I don't want to come back and say that I had a slip. Yeah. That's a big part of it. Even though no one in the community is like physically holding me accountable, I hold

myself accountable through you guys just because I just don't want to, I don't want to have that. I don't, it took me so long to get this far that I don't want to start over. It took me 20 plus years to get seven months. Yeah. I don't want to go back. No going back. What interesting too, though, because you've been hiding it for a bit and everything like that

and the dynamic with getting caught the last time. What is your wife saying now with seven months? She probably knew you could do it. And she's surprised at all maybe in the way things have changed for you because I think that's one thing, right? We're like, we're faced with this big obstacle of quitting alcohol. And then I think soon after we realize, okay, you know what? Like, I quit maybe two weeks ago.

though, but like my life is still a little bit shaky. Maybe there's more to it. And you've done a lot of the other work as far as communication and plugging in and being honest and being willing and being teachable and all the other elements that just make all this go around. What does she, has she said anything or have you noticed anything about like other changes in your life or that you've made? Yeah.

Yeah. She is super, super proud of me. And almost to the point where sometimes I'm almost like, okay, let's chill out a little bit. Her and the kids got on Amazon and ordered me like a six-month chip and things like that. But I do notice just in general, my relationships with my family have been so much better. And she's trusting me again. There was a while and absolutely as it should be that she didn't trust me. And that's completely understandable.

I don't trust myself. Yeah. But just the other day, I asked her, I had the kids. I can't remember exact scenario, but I had a couple of the kids, and I said, I just text her, hey, I'm going to run down to the store, and I'm going to grab this and this, and she's, okay. And then she texts me back, and she's, I am so happy that you're sober, and I'm so proud of you for being sober.

It's such a huge, like a huge relief. Because, like I said, people aren't dumb. she was nervous every time I was alone for ample reasons. You know what I mean? And she was right. She was right to be. And the fact now that she can leave and go do whatever and trust me that I'm not drinking with the kids around and not going to pick up booze and stuff while she's going like that,

it's just so nice. And I've really talked to my oldest son about it a lot. and apologize to him and things like that. And it's just, I'm just so much more present. I was always there, but I'm just so much more present and everything. I went to both my daughters had started dance this week. I get to see this goon walk in. And I'm just sitting there.

And it's funny because when my sons play sports, I go nuts. But then when my daughters dance, I'm in the back like, oh, misty-eyed. It's so funny how it's different. the boys and the girls, but yeah, just, I don't know, man, there's no days wasted. And if there's a day that we don't do anything, it's a hundred times different than being hungover. It's actually relaxing. And I just, I just feel so much more involved and more, more present for everybody. It's been great. It's been a huge, huge improvement. And obviously, hindsight being what it is, I wish I would have did this 10, 15 years ago. But, but I'm glad to be where I am now. And

Better late than never, for sure. Yeah. Yeah. That's the thing with all of this, right? Is it's, yeah, we would like to go back and have more time. Maybe not regret everything, but go back and have more time. But it's also, I don't know, man. Does it take what it takes?

We talk about it from time to time in the groups. Does it take the painful moments, the things we do and say that we can't take back once they're out there? Does it take some of that for us to see through? maybe our own BS, our own delusion, our own denial in a sense to say, you know what? Like, I think what you brought up there too is so interesting about being present because I people in my life, like I'm sure most of us do that still drink. And where they're at as far on the spectrum of having a problem and not for them to figure out. But I often wonder that.

Do people realize how little present they actually are? Hey, their feet might be there and their head might be there. But it's different on this side of things, man. Even if you just only had two drinks or three drinks or whatever it is. I'm just like, man, anytime when I was in that space, my feet were somewhere, but I wasn't really there, fully engaged, aware of my surroundings in the sunset and the birds and the grass and the ice cream machine or the cotton candy or whatever it is.

And now when I go to these places, I'm just like, man, the life is just so beautiful. And you can't see it. I just, I couldn't anyway, man. I couldn't see it. When I had my first drink, my brain just flipped and it just was worried about where the next one was coming from. Yeah, I agree with that 100%. I do think it takes what it takes.

I don't think. until this last time, and I've heard other people say it too, like, this felt different than it ever had before. And I think I just, I don't think I was ready for whatever reason. I wasn't, I know I wasn't because I wouldn't give it up. And it was going to cost me everything. And I love being a dad. I love being a husband. I don't want to lose that, especially for something that doesn't give me anything.

Literally, there's nothing value added. Yeah, and the fact that I was coasting through, like I said earlier with my oldest son, man, I wish I would have been there more, actually present and in the moment, instead of having my head somewhere else, thinking about the next drink or thinking about this or that. So, yeah, I do think it, I do think it takes every drink it takes. Yeah, yeah. What do you say to somebody out there who might be listening and maybe is struggling a little bit with getting started or staying on track with you? things. I would highly recommend some sort of community, whether it's sober motivation with us or AA or whatever. I've said multiple times and I will stand on it that it would not be sober without the community. I fully believe that. I've tried my own so many times. Try it on my own,

tried my own ways, tried to white-knuckle it, just on sheer stubbornness. And I couldn't. And also, I would say just to know that you're not alone at all. There are so many people out there that are going through the same thing that don't know or don't want to talk about it or don't want to bring it up, but you are not alone in this. are so many people that that suffer with the same addiction, drinking problems, whatever like that. That kept me out of these communities for a long time because I thought I was the only one. And nobody could understand what I was going through just to find out that I just hadn't checked the right places yet.

Yeah. No, I love that. You thought we were going to be strange or weird, didn't you, Andy? Yeah, I was like, I don't know. I don't know what to expect, but yeah, it's, I've done other communities and I just, I've checked out other meetings and things like that. And I just love it. I love the sober motivation community. Everybody's super, super helpful.

And I just, I feel like I just clicked right away, right away from my first couple meetings. And I, I made a point to share early just because it really helped. Listening helps. but I just got such a relief and a weight off my chest when I would get in there and talk about my stuff as well. Yeah. And it's, yeah. Yeah, it helps. And you probably went those two decades or 20 plus years or maybe even longer, maybe not talking about what was going on.

And then when you get a chance to empty the bag a little bit, it can be a sense of relief, man. But you did it right, though. You jumped in, you plugged in first meet. Maybe I put you on the spot a little bit. I don't know. You plugged in, man. You haven't stopped. You've been committed to it.

And I think that's important on this journey. And I know everybody's got busy schedules and whatever it is you decide to plug into or maybe it's just a podcast too. Wherever you land with things, I think it's always important to be honest with ourselves. I spent a lot of time, effort and money and everything in the other direction. When I got sober, it was still. time for me to put in some time every day. I need to touch my sobriety. I had a busy Saturday. And every day, a goal of mine is I got to touch my sobriety in one way or another. And I use that for

me, the big part of that is talking with somebody that's on the journey. And I realized by the end of the day, I said, gosh, I hadn't talked with anybody. And my kids were like, can we watch K-pop demon hunters? And I was like, yeah, I'll put it on for you for a couple minutes. And I jumped on the meeting that they were hosting in the app. And it just feels good. You got to, it. It just feels good to touch base with people that are on the journey. Like, it just does, man. You get it. It gets things.

You get them. And it really makes a big difference, man. Anything else, Andy, that we've skipped over? I mean, seven months, February, 16th then? 17th. 17th. Riddle me this really quick. On the 16th, when you woke up, were there any thoughts in your mind that the next day would be the start to this whole thing?

No. No, I just assumed I would be alone, drink, get rid of everything, and nobody would be the wiser. Yeah, so no, I had no real clue. And looking back, as painful as it is sometimes to think about, it was the best thing that's happened to me as far as being able to get and stay sober for any amount of time. time. Yeah. Yeah, it's so interesting because I've been asking the most recent guess if I think about it during the episode is that, hey, like the day before you quit drinking, did you, did you have an idea that it was going to happen? And everybody's no, no idea. And I say that because there's people out there who are listening right now who don't believe it's ever going to be possible. And then this is like a true thing right here, the day before you.

put together seven months, sobriety or not drinking was not even on your radar. That's how quick things can change. So I think it's cool. Yeah, and I will say too, I was the king of what I would always call a last hurrah. And it like, it was such a running joke that it was, there was always a reason to drink. We got Christmas this weekend and then I'll stop and this will be my last hurrah. And it was like every weekend. So it got to be a running joke. And, you know, Yeah, no, I had no idea. This is where I would be seven months, seven months ago. Yeah.

Yeah, which is so interesting because that's when I see a big, I see a big green light for people who stick with it. It's when you just decide. Enough is enough. Like, I just decide. This is just, I'm not willing to sacrifice everything in my life anymore for this one thing. Like, what you mentioned earlier just delivers absolutely nothing. but dreams of some euphoric experience that we're never going to get again.

It's never going to be like it once was, no matter what you believe or how you mix it up or where you drink it at or who you drink it with. It will never be like it once was. And it's the people that just say, you know what? I'm just deciding that I'm trying something different. And they actually go in and do something different makes all the difference, man. Any last thoughts, Andy? No, just one day at a time.

If you're curious, give it a shot. Yeah, nothing bad can come from it. Yeah, that's the truth too. Andy, I really appreciate you jumping on here, man. It's been great over the last seven months to get to know you in being part of the community. And we're going to meet, man. We're going to meet with the community in Toronto and what, a little over a week. Yeah, I'm excited.

I'm pumped up for that. I'm pumped up for it. It's going to be a good time for sure. No matter what, I'm not going to go with the flow, man. I roll with the punches. We'll have a good time. Yeah, same. Have a good night, Andy.

You too, man. Thanks, Brad. I appreciate it. Yeah. Well, there it is. Another incredible episode here on the podcast. Huge shout out to Andy, the goat 2.0.

Since getting sober, he's saving so much money that his wife has now started a farm at house and he's called the Goat 2.0 in the community. So and there's all another story to that. But we'll leave it at that for now. Send Andy and know if you were able to connect with her. Enjoyed his episode here on the podcast. I'll drop his Instagram contact information down in the show notes below. And I'll see you on the next one.