Sober Motivation: Sharing Sobriety Stories - From an obsession with skateboarding to and obsession with alcohol. Chad's story of sobriety.

Episode Date: September 6, 2024

In this episode, I sit down with Chad Caruso to discuss his incredible journey from skateboarding to overcoming addiction. Chad shares candid insights about his upbringing, his passion for skateboarding, and how he gradually fell into the damaging cycle of alcohol. Despite facing challenges like dropping out of school and multiple DWIs, Chad turned his life around, finding sobriety and embarking on ambitious projects such as skating across all 50 states in 50 days and ultimately setting a Guinness World Record by skateboarding across the United States. This is Chad's story on the Sober Motivation podcast. -------- Join the SoberMotivation Community: https://sobermotivation.mn.co/ More Information On SoberLink: https://www.soberlink.com/recover Connect with Chad on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chad_caruso/

Welcome back to Season 3 of the Suburmotivation podcast. Join me, Brad, each week as my guests and I share incredible and powerful sobriety stories. We are here to show sobriety as possible, one story at a time. Let's go. In this episode, I sit down with Chad to discuss his incredible journey from skateboarding to sobriety. Chad shares candid insights about his upbringing, his passion for skateboarding, and how he gradually fell into the damaging cycle of alcohol. Despite facing challenges like dropping out of school and multiple DWIs,

Chad turned his life around finding sobriety and embarking on an ambitious project such as skating across all 50 states and 50 days, ultimately setting a Guinness World Record by skateboarding across the United States. And this is Chad's story on the sober motivation podcast. Welcome back everyone to another episode. So happy you're here to check out Chad's story. Look, I did the announcement here on the podcast, over the last week about the new sober motivation community.

And let me tell you, things are off to an incredible start. We have over 100 founding members. We had our meetings this week. And let me tell you, it went quick, a ton of people plugging in. The community chat is just on fire. So many people just supporting each other. We've got people starting out to many years, to many, many years, all coming together to help each other feel less alone, more connected,

and get another day sober. That's the ultimate mission with the suburb motivation community. And I would love to have you. The great news is, is I'm keeping things open for anybody to join us as a founding member until Monday. So if you want to get connected, join some virtual meetings, be plugged in with other people that are on the journey. Be part of an incredible community that lifts each other up at every turn. This is your official, official invite to click the link down below this episode or send me a message

over on Instagram. I'll send you over the link, and I hope to see you in a meeting soon. I've taken the device everywhere with me. It's gone on camping trips, holidays, vacations, even Iceland. It was really useful for when I wanted to travel. I wanted to be able to visit friends and family and really be able to live my life. Those quotes are from Soberlink users who have found peace of mind while enjoying vacations, even in early alcohol recovery, when traveling can feel scary. Maybe you're nervous about going away from your support network or your loved ones are concerned about a possible relapse. That's where Soberlink comes in.

Here's how Soberlink helps keep you accountable. You'll test at scheduled times each day two to three times a day. Facial recognition confirms your identity. Tamper sensors detect any attempts to cheat the system. And instant easy to read results are sent directly to your loved ones giving them peace of mind while you enjoy your time away. Soberlink isn't just about proving you're sober. It's about building confidence in your recovery, even when you're miles away.

Soberlink, proof of sobriety at your fingertips wherever life takes you. Visit soberlink.com slash recover to sign up and receive $50 off your device. And I want to give a huge shout out to Soberlink for continuing here and there to sponsor the podcast and offer this incredible opportunity for so many people. Thank you so much, Soberlink. Now let's get to the episode. Right before we jump into this episode, I want to share this quick story about the Chinese bamboo tree. Have you heard of it before?

Let me share this with you. The story of the Chinese bamboo tree is often used as a metaphor for patience, persistence, and faith, highlighting the importance of long-term dedication before seeing significant results. Here's how the story goes. The growth process of the Chinese bamboo tree. After planting a seed of a Chinese bamboo tree, nothing seems to happen for the first few years. In fact, for five years, you see no visible signs of growth above the soil. Throughout this time, however, the bamboo seed requires daily watering and care.

Without the consistent attention, the seed would not survive and would never grow. Then seeminglylessly, all at once in the fifth year, the bamboo tree shoots up, growing as much as 90 feet in just six weeks. The key lessons from the story, patience and faith. During those first five years, even though there's no visible growth, something significant is happening beneath the surface. The roots are growing deep, establishing a strong foundation necessary to support the bamboo's eventual rapid growth. This is a reminder to stay patient and trust the process even when progress can't be seen. Consistency and effort.

The tree requires constant nurturing. Even when there's no immediate reward, this highlights the importance of consistent effort, discipline, and perseverance, as success may take time and often comes after sustained, unseen work. Exponential growth. The bamboo's sudden dramatic growth after years of dormancy serves as a metaphor for success or achievement. Sometimes progress appears slow and non-existent, but with constant effort, breakthroughs can happen quickly and dramatically. Foundation building. Just like the bamboo tree's root spreading out during those first five years, the story teaches us that building a solid foundation is crucial for long-term growth and success.

The Chinese bamboo tree story is often used to inspire people in various walks of life from personal growth to business ventures, and in this case, sobriety, showing that success often requires time, persistence, and unseen effort. I shared it with the sober motivation community the other day, and I thought it was well received. I always love that story because I feel like in sobriety and so many other areas of our life, we can feel like we're doing all the work and we're just not seeing or feeling the progress, but it doesn't mean that we're not making progress. It could be a lot closer than we think. Welcome back to another episode of the Sober Motivation podcast. Today we've got Chad with us. Chad, how are you? Doing great. How are you feeling? I'm all right, man. Thank you for asking.

Thank you for being willing to jump on here and share your story with all of us. No, thank you. I appreciate you having me on and everything you do. Thank you. So what was it like for you growing up? I mean, it's pretty straightforward. You know, nothing crazy going on. Long Island, New York, good parents, two older brothers. You know, I'm always like competing with them trying to keep up because I was the youngest. And, yeah, parents divorced, but dad was always around.

But nothing that, like, really stuck out and, like, caused me, you know, to go towards addiction or anything, or at least that stands out in my eyes, you know. Yeah. Thanks for sharing that, too. two older brothers, yeah, you're trying to make your way to the top in a sense, right? It's interesting too, though, right? Because a lot of times, and I talk about this a lot on the show, a lot of times I think people from the outside world that maybe don't have the close-to-home connection with addiction, they're thinking like something must have happened in the beginning

years and those essential years as we grow up, something, you know, big red flag or something must have happened to them. But it is very common on the show for parents, to divorce in a sense, right? And the dynamics, you know, it sounds like it was good dynamics for you. People share different stories. How old were you when that happened? I was, honestly, I think it was before I could even really remember. So like two or three, I'm sure my older brothers have a different experience of that. But for me, it was, you know, I saw my dad in the weekends and, you know, hung out with my mom during the week. Yeah. So moving forward from that, what was school and everything like for you on those early years?

Yeah, I was always getting in trouble. I just couldn't sit still, not make people laugh or just doing something crazy. I think part of it was I just wasn't fully interested in the things that they were teaching or offering. And then I eventually ended up dropping out of school. You know, a few years later, I was like 16, but I had gotten left back twice. So school was just always like I could never. At one point, my dad, I was a skateboarder. And he had offered me a trip to California if I could pass. All I had to do is pass. 65s just barely pass, and I failed. Oh, man. So it's like even, you know, it was like a layup for me basically, and I still just couldn't, something about school. I don't know if it's the, like, following parameters, you know, just like something about repetition or what's normal is just kind of boring to me. And it's hard for me to get excited about. Yeah, no, I'm with you on that, man. I was never into the academics. I can relate to that, man. I was getting in trouble ever since I could remember to get in school suspension, out of school suspension, you know, as things progressed.

So you get into skateboarding. I mean, that's a big part of your story, right? Is it skateboarding and stuff? What does that look like, though? Are you still on Long Island then when you get into skateboarding? Yeah. So I have trouble remembering the exact year, but I think I was about years old. And really good athlete, played basketball, baseball. I'm on all the teams, like one of the best players. And then once I found skateboarding, I just completely dropped all of those and just became dead focused on that. And to me, that just spoke to me way more because there's no rules, no boundaries, no arena,

skate with anyone, skate with no one. It's just kind of like limitless. You know, you make your own rules. Yeah. Yeah. I love that, man. When I think it's skateboarding, I think back, I think they were called soaps. You ever hear, you ever hear?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. You had a couple pair of those, right? I had one. They were expensive. They were expensive. I remember you'd have the, I don't know where you got yours, but I remember I got mine at journeys. Yeah, I think it was, yeah, some mall store. I can't remember exactly, but yeah. Yeah, they popped in for a couple of years and then disappeared. Yeah. No, exactly. So you get into skateboarding, though, but I mean, this is, you know, from what it sounds like, just hearing a little bit of your story there, right? This checked a lot of boxes for you. And what I noticed, I was always on the outside of skateboarding. Like I had the board and tried to do that as never my thing. But what I noticed from a lot of my friends saying high school,

and maybe in middle school, like the trend really picked up for me. I just turned 37. So that's maybe a picture into that. And I noticed the skateboarding was one part of it, but it was also like the friendships and in the culture that came along with skateboarding, which was people really seemed to be attracted to. Was that something that kind of brought you into it or kept you with the skateboarding thing or no? Yeah, yeah, 100%.

I mean, and I always loved the aspect of anyone can skate with anyone. Like, I would take out my 10-year-old little cousin to go skate with, you know, 35-year-old men. And we'd go to, like, Philadelphia on a skate trip. You know, like, there was really no, like, you know, anyone fit in. If you had a skateboard, you were in, you know? Yeah, yeah, so true. Cool. So you dropped out at school.

I mean, what's the response like from people around you? And what was that thought process like? Yeah, my parents are generally kind of laid back. Like, I had less rules than most of the kids around me. They're both kind of into Buddhism and yoga their whole lives. So definitely more on the more lenient side. They didn't want me to do it. But once I lock in, I'm just like a wrecking ball.

There's no real stopping me. So I think they just were like, they said as much as they could. You know, but at the end of the day, day, that's what I was going to do. Yeah. Yeah. And how old were you when you did that? I was about 16.

It was my second time getting left back. And then I was like, why am I doing this? Yeah. Well, I mean, what feelings were you going through, though? I mean, I was almost excited to get out of there and, you know, just explore different options. So the second I could pursue skateboarding more, maybe go to California, do this and that, that was all that was on my mind. So while I was in school, I was just leaving in the middle of the day, you know,

going on trips anyway. So it just made sense. Yeah. So you do that. I mean, what do you start to do with your time then at 16? Is it a skateboard? Well, luckily, the first thing I did was get my GED because I knew I probably wouldn't do it later on.

So I went in there and I like convinced the teacher. I'm like, oh, I'm a skateboarder. I'm traveling. I really wasn't, but she helped me kind of do it like really quickly. So it always took me like a week or two, got it done. And then that was it. So I just moved on after that. Moved on to where do you move on to? Yeah, I mean, honestly, it's a pretty aimless path. Like I knew I wanted a skateboard, but I never really had a goal or like a set focus. And I also almost didn't even want money. So I didn't really have these like driving forces. I just wanted to experience life.

Like that was always paramount, you know, which I mean, in our society doesn't usually pan out well when you just go on a 10 year run of just experiencing life and not maybe having a job or a career. Yeah. You know, or not thinking. I wasn't even thinking about skateboarding in that way at all, you know. Yeah. Okay. Gotcha. So when, I mean, when do you start drinking and stuff? Is that around this time too or no? A little bit after. So I'm about, let's see, I think 21 or so, 22, I start working at the local skate shop, meeting guys, there's like parties and stuff like that.

I'm going, but I hadn't really drank my whole life. It was never really anything that was present. The real thing that, you know, snapped me into that behavior was an injury. I tore my ACL and PCL and my left knee. And I was like, you know, just torn. in bed, nothing to do. So I would talk about skating, go to parties, you know, hang out, that type of stuff. I healed up.

I was so diligent about it, you know, and then I think it was like nine months later, I was fully healed at the skate park and a BMX kid crashed into me and tore my MCL on the same knee. So after all that healing, I was like deflated, you know, not really like, I can't get another surgery. I was like, you know, just completely done. And that kind of segued me into more of the, you know, drinking lifestyle. Yeah.

Man, that all on the same knee too. Wow. Same knee, yeah. My goodness. So, I mean, what does it look like for you? Because people, when they start drinking, people share different stories. I mean, what was it like for you when you first got into it? It was gradual.

You know, I still had the love for skateboarding and it was young. So I was going out more. But it became a lot easier to instead of like, facing the difficult challenges of like maybe getting sponsored or doing contests or just continuing to push yourself, it was much easier to just drink and talk about what you've done and hang out with people. And, you know, so slowly over time kind of sank into that. And I have an obsessive tendency just as a human. When I get locked into something, you know, I'm all in. So I slowly became all in on just drinking and nothing matters.

floating in infinity, what does this all matter for, you know, that type of thinking. Yeah. And see, I almost laughed about how not serious I took life. You know, so I just drink, whatever, I get in trouble, nothing matters, this and that, you know. Yeah. Just kind of going with the flow there in a sense. I mean, what does your home life look like through like your 20s here? Like, are you at your parents' place?

Since I was like, I don't know, 16, even when I was in school, I was staying at people's houses. You know, even when I was in school, I'd be at someone's house for like six months straight on school days, you know? And then I lived in California for a bit. So I would just float around, help people with work and like they had an extra apartment downstairs. You know, so I was just always kind of floating and like taking odd jobs, learning things. But yeah, no, you know, nothing really set, you know. Yeah. Gotcha.

Well, I guess mom's house was home base, you know, if there was nowhere to stay, it end up. there. Yeah. And you went out to California for a bit, too. I mean, skating really is big in California, right? Yeah. Well, when you're a kid from New York, that's like the mecca, especially before the internet was a thing.

You know, it was just like California. I was like, that's where all the pros live and all the videos and everything. Yeah. Speaking of pros, though, I saw that you were, I saw your, your thing there with Tony Hawk, too. Yeah. Crazy. He was actually in the first video I ever watched as a kid. So it's cool, like, full circle to have met him and, you know.

That is crazy. Does he still skate? Still skating. He actually snapped his femur like two years ago or so and came back and his full skating again, which at that age is, I mean, that's mind-blower. Yeah. I'll never forget, man, the Tony Hawk game, the video game. Oh, yeah.

Of course. Everyone, especially our age, I'm 372, like anyone from that time period remembers. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like that just put like, like I wasn't plugged into the, to the lifestyle, the culture at all. But I feel like that really blew things up, you know, for skateboarding that game there.

For sure. It was a great game, man. Yeah, put skateboarding on the map for sure. Yeah. And Tony Hawk. Cool, Matt. So you go through this, right? So you're kind of like, I'm just painting a picture here.

You kind of just, you know, wandering around in a sense, right? Just going here, doing that, doing the odd jobs, you know, skateboarding is really your thing. I mean, you're starting to drink a little bit. And I think, like, a lot of people's stories share too. It's progressive, right? It doesn't start out as this, oh my goodness, right? I've got a, this is going to be a serious problem. But then we kind of, as we go through the stage, as we realize, you know, things pick up a little bit. I mean, is that part of your story with it at all? 100%. It's sneaky. And even when it's, like, gotten bad a lot of the times most times we still don't even admit it or realize it we're still

like eh that's not really a problem you know i still go to work it's fine or like you know it's pretty common so for me yeah it definitely snuck up and i mean i was very functional and i wasn't really harming anyone around me you know too much except for probably like a byproduct just um maybe emotionally or the things i would do here and there but i lived a pretty solitary life, so I wasn't living with someone and, like, destroying their life directly, you know? Or at least maybe I was just unaware of it. Yeah, but, yeah, when I got the DWIs, that's when it hit me. Because I got two DWIs. And then I was in $10,000 of debt, facing jail time. People are lending me money that they don't have. And I'm like, all right, I never cared about my own life,

but now it's affecting other people. You know, and that's when I started feeling bad and wanting to change. Yeah. When was that? What about was that when you got them? Well, I quit drinking about eight, nine years ago. So the last DWI was about nine years ago. And then before that, you know, three years before that was the other one, which was why I was

facing jail time because two within a three year period in New York is like almost a guaranteed you know, sentence. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Even leading up to that, though, what did life look like for you, you know, involving the drinking and stuff? Like, too, you kind of mentioned something there that.

Yeah. Kind of stood out to me about, I can't remember it exactly. But what I got from it was that you didn't really care about yourself and sort of what that looked like. How do you work through a place like that or kind of get to a place like that? Yeah. Well, I mean, it was a lot of. of my mindset and the view of the world. One of my main goals just being a human was always thinking

about like why we're here, the main mission, what's the point? You know, so I would contemplate our place and, you know, infinity and a little rock and like how important is what I'm doing and this and that. And, you know, if you're drinking and that, it's very easy to not have a positive outlook, especially after the skateboarding thing fell through. So it's very easy. So it's very easy. easy to just take a darker turn with that. And then I was, you know, I was anyone's drinking buddy at any time. And I had no money, no nothing, but I would just be there to be the party and people wanted someone the party with if they were out, you know? So buy me drinks. I would drink the drinks off the bar. I would drive everyone's car home every night because I didn't care about my own, like I want you to get in trouble.

I'll make sure we get home, you know. and then slowly that led into like cocaine and then doing that all the time so that kind of just kept boiling yeah it's like too if there's no maybe intervention externally internally wherever you know if nothing's kind of standing in our way it's easy to keep things going right and then it just kind of snowballs yeah yeah then you look up and you're like wait what how do I get here yes man I can relate I can relate to that I dude, I had that thought so many times. And I always thought, too.

I always told myself, like, well, if this happened, of course, I'm going to straighten that. Of course. If that happens, yeah, of course. Like, I'm going to, and I remember it's an interesting story. I remember for the first time I tried heroin. And I was this older guy. I worked with a restaurant. And it was kind of like trying to mentor me throughout this sort of process.

And, you know, there's like, you know, short conversation. I don't remember it word for word. But the idea of it was, is, hey, it's really hard to turn. back from this next step. So make your choice wisely, you know? Yeah. And it was really weird coming from, you know, the person I'm getting into all this with, but it was almost like he had already been down that road personally and understood the struggle and was trapped in that cycle. Right. And it was just such an interesting time I reflect back on. At the time, I didn't give it any thought, but it was almost like I had told myself, you know, when I started out with drinking and

I started out with doing cocaine and I started out with prescription pills. Like, of course, but this was the red line. I would never cross over that. And then it's so interesting how we set those red lines and then we find ourselves up against them. And then we find ourselves on the other side sometimes. I don't know if that makes any sense. No, it makes a ton of sense. And I mean, on the other end, when I've gotten out of drinking, things I thought I would never do,

year two, year five. Now they seem normal every day. I don't even think about them. So it does make sense. You know, like you think something's impossible and then you're slowly messing around with things in that neighborhood and then two years go by and it doesn't seem that crazy. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

You can't soften things up around. You know, you have this like imaginary wall and then you hang out near enough and it disappears. Yeah. That's an incredible way to put it. And, you know, it's interesting too, right? Because a lot of us, we had that first drink. I didn't anyway. I wasn't educated on things, how it was.

I grew up in the DARE program, you're 372, so you probably crossed through it at some point. And the messaging was just say no, right? Just say no to drugs, right? And at that time, I didn't categorize alcohol as a drug. Like, I had no idea that, I mean, they sold it at stores. Like, come on. The cops are coming in and talking to us about, you know, quote unquote drugs. I was like, well, you know, if I stay away from, I just say no to that, I'll be good.

But it wasn't that cut dry. and the messaging that I feel I missed out on was, okay, I wasn't able to say no. And now I'm in this spot. And I was never really taught or shown how to ask for help. I just internalized all of it, internalized the struggle, and just never really was able to reach up for help. I was just like, you know, what, I failed to test. No one understands. No one's going to understand.

It was like that, you know, thing moving forward. Yeah. No, I mean, you know, it's funny. we still consider alcohol, not a drug today. You know what I mean? It's pretty common to not even view it that way. And yeah, I mean, it's the same thing. It's, as we were just saying, it softens you up over time, you know?

So you're having the drinks and it loosens you up to certain things. Yeah. So you get these two DWIs, you're $10,000 in debt. And you start to maybe realize that. What I'm doing, my choices, my behaviors are starting to impact maybe those around me. It's kind of started to, in one way or another, seep into other areas of your life and other people's lives. I mean, how does that change how you're looking at where you're at in life? Yeah, I was always taking this pride in maybe not being like everyone else or messing up, you know, in life and doing things just in an untraditional way or, or,

I don't know, maybe being different. I don't really know what it was, but there was like something. And I think a lot of people do it. You just cling on to this certain kind of behavior. And after so much pain, I finally realized like that something's got to change. I got to get rid of that behavior. And I just snapped into just making better decisions. It was so simple almost.

But I just realized I was leaning into this almost character, right? I don't know. And then once I stopped, life slowly got better. It was always there. It was always easy. And I was just purposefully taking these difficult choices. And who knows where that comes from? You know, maybe it's a lack of like self-love or appreciation or who knows.

But yeah, I did it. Yeah. So, I mean, how does the sobriety thing come to mind, right? Because I've heard a lot of people here share on the show, you know, they got the DWIs. and it was just like kind of maybe carry on a couple days later, you know, different stories, right? So, I mean, what happened for you after that last one? I mean, is that when you really change direction? So I quit for a year.

My first time was a year. Well, so this was before the second DWI. I got the first DWI. They gave me the mandated probation going to classes and stuff like that. So I quit for a year. And I even later on. I drank around going to the classes. You know, so if I had like a three-day window, I would drink and then try to be clean

for when I had to show up, you know? And then the second time around is when everything really stuck and I went into it with like, I want to do this, you know? Yeah. And then I remember just going to probation after the second DWI and I had a different attitude. I was like excited to see people and meet them and this and that and everyone in there is like, why am I here? This is unfair. I hate life. You know, and I'm just like, excited to do well.

Look, I have a clean test. I'm excited. And then they gave me more leeway because I was, like, life got easier because I wasn't making it more difficult myself. Yeah. No, that makes a ton of sense, right? The changes that, the changes that come with it, right? Yeah, I mean, that's the problem. I think it, like I saw this thing one time that at first, alcohol might be a, solution to problems, but then it becomes a main source of problems for us, right? And that's why I think eliminating it, we realize so many benefits. Yeah, it's a mask. You have pain and it's short-term pain, and you pour alcohol on it to avoid it, and then it boil, or any drug, and it boils over time and gets worse and worse and worse until it explodes. That's basically it. So you could either

face it immediately and try to understand it with clear, open eyes or, you know, you just keep avoiding it, keep pouring something on it. It could be prescription medicine, could be anything, you know, but essentially that's how I view almost all the things we put in our body is some sort of way to avoid pain, you know? Yeah. That's great. So, so you got the one year and then you went back. So, I mean, how do things look like for you after, though? After your, your second thing of probation, you're really plugging into the classes. I mean, learning, maybe learning a few things, right? How do things change for you there in the early days? Yeah, I mean, so the classes were, you know, super early on. Maybe I took a little away, but really, I never went to a meeting.

I did it all completely solo, essentially. Nothing against meetings. It just wasn't like my thing. Like, you know, with the school thing, I just kind of always wanted to figure things out of my own. To my own detriment, who knows, but it's funner. So, yeah, after I quit drinking the, the second time. So I hadn't used social media at all. I was completely against it. I thought it was like lame. Everyone's taking these pictures and egotistical and posting. This is like early Facebook, MySpace, you know. So I was just staying off of it. Wouldn't use a cell phone. Completely unplugged, right? Just floating around doing my own thing. And then when I got sober, I was like, I'm just going to embrace this thing that I hated. Right. And so I started a YouTube channel.

I thought I'm going to share everything I learned through skateboarding, try to give back, and have a hobby to focus on instead of drinking because I needed something to fill that void. Yeah. Yeah. So you started a YouTube channel. You bring up my space there too. Now we're going back. So you start a YouTube channel to share.

I mean, what was your message to put out there to people? I mean, so in the beginning, it was my whole life, all I've ever done. done was take from skateboarding. 20 years going to parties and contests and this and that enjoying it. And I've never really given back. And this was a thought I had from getting sober. I realized all I've ever done is taken. So I started throwing contests. I started trying to get skate parks built in my area. And I started putting out all the information I knew just to try to help people and help skateboarding. Yeah. And what was the response from your efforts? Well, I thought I was actually doing the like tutorials and stuff for kids.

And it turned out my audience was like 30 to 50 year old, people getting into it later, always wanted to do it. Or people like, you know, me and you that are looking for a passion when they got sober later in life, you know? So slowly that kind of, I realized the audience. It was like people like me, you know? And then I started talking more about the alcohol and time. Yeah.

Did it take you some time to like work up to be comfortable with that? Yeah, and I also, I was completely unaware of it. You know, I was just surviving. I was just trying to figure out my next way forward. I wasn't thinking I could help anyone get out of this. I'm not even out of it myself yet, you know? Yeah. Yeah.

For sure. When you decided to give up drinking, did you share it with it? Like, did everybody know around you or how did that look? Yeah, so that's a good question. So I would actually still hang out with my friends and go to the bar until like 4 a.m. and drive them. So I would just still be hanging out. And then like that really opened my eyes to a lot of things because it's just like,

oh, I'm going out and I'm standing for six hours. And we're basically talking about nothing. Like when you're sober and you're sitting there, you're like, wow, this is insane. They're like, I'm just standing around, you know, night after night. And I slowly started to fade away and see like the almost the emptiness of it. And so I guess a lot of people avoid that because it could be triggering. but for me, I don't know. I just like, I think once I locked into that was going to be sober,

I was just so, like nothing can break me. You know, once I committed to it, I felt just so locked in. And now even more so in time building up all these positive experiences, now it's like, why would I ever give it up? You know what I mean? So, like, I feel like as time keeps going, it just becomes easier and easier. Yeah, because of everything you're experiencing. Yeah, it's all about momentum.

You know, getting the ball rolling from stationary is much harder. You know, and it's like everything feels weird and uncomfortable. You're all these learning curves, getting new friends, new this, new that. It's tough, you know, so after a year or two, it starts getting much easier, you know. Yeah. Well, that's scary, though, for people to hear sometimes, chat, a year or two. But it is so true. I mean, there's different learning curves. And you're right. Yeah, I mean, I jumped over, you know, month one, you'll feel great. You'll feel clear and energized and, you know, they're like month three or six. This is just for me too. This isn't like across the board for everyone. I'll be clear on that. But, you know, you start to realize I'm doing all these things and I don't really like them. I was just doing them because I wanted to be out with friends or because I was drinking. Like, I don't like this stuff.

I don't like going to baseball games. Like, I'm just going to drink and hang out. And then when you're sober, you like slowly find your own path, you know, something that you're interested in, something you're excited about, feeling that time that was used at night and sleeping in late, you fill that in with this podcast, you know, like something you're excited about, you know? Yeah. And that's so true.

And I think that a lot of people, too, you know, share a story about drinking, being tied so closely to their identity. You know, a lot of people, you know, the party guy or or just the mommy wine culture in a sense, right? Different, different than our stories, but you get in there and you make your connections, your friends. And I think when you step back from it, from the drinking culture, you start to realize how much your life revolved around alcohol and how much it maybe helped us. For me, anyway, it helped me fit into these sometimes awkward situations. And I felt like the guard could come down and I had less anxiety and I wasn't so insecure about who I was or where I've been. And when you get out of that, you start to realize that. And then I think that

that's really like you mentioned there, probably six months to a year. That's kind of that sweet spot where we had that clarity and realized like, you know, this was a lot bigger than just drinking alcohol. Like there was a lot more at play. And then also finding that, you know, finding other stuff to do. I mean, what are we going to do, right? Like a lot of extra time. time. Yeah. No, that's a great point you bring up to about the uncomfortableness, like being out or social situations. I realized from drinking that I had to relearn how to be a person essentially. Like, I had this idea of myself that I lived as a drinker where I could make people laugh and I was funny and this and that. But I had to learn how to do that sober. You know what I mean?

It's like a long learning curve. I had to learn how to go. go out and like be myself of the situation and not scratch that itch of uncomfortability with a drink and like sink into it. Feel it. Why do I feel this way? Like, you know, and it is a long, but such an interesting journey. And if you go into it with open eyes, it's, yeah, I don't know, you just keep learning about yourself and it's, it makes your life more full, I feel.

Oh my gosh. Does it ever? Does it ever, man? It's deeper connections with others. It's deeper connections with ourselves. and whatever else is out there that we you know when I was drinking I felt like I was connected right we're going out with our buddies right we're chasing girls we're doing everything we do in our younger years whatever right but I just realized too like my friends and I that's all we had in common

like we didn't do anything else we didn't go grab coffee on a Saturday we didn't and it was kind of like a grieving moment too like early on in sobriety to like grieve in a sense what was and in realize that I'm probably moving forward not going to have this many acquaintances anymore. Like I'm not going out on Friday night waiting for the phone call, going and plugging into this stuff. And it was really tough for me personally, man, because I had built up that identity as like that person going out, partying all that type of stuff. It was like I was wrapped up in that.

That gave me a purpose. That helped me feel worthy. And it was all kind of built on quicksand. And it was like learning in the early, days and in the months and the years about like exactly what you said man i had to relearn how to live life and one of the scariest things for me personally was being responsible you know i was the guy living in an overdraft and switching banks and not paying payments and paying rent late and you know just being late here and doing this and it was like when i was drinking i could just drink and be like

all right whatever but when i was sober there was no running anymore yeah you see everything it's right there yeah there's no hiding from me it. Yeah. So moving forward, man, I mean, you sent me this note before that you set a Guinness World Record. I mean, are we close to that point in your story about talking about that at all? Yeah. I mean, we're still, let's see, maybe six years from that. So I started the YouTube channel and then I was just, I'm $10,000 in debt. I'm doing now. I'm like just, my mind is set, I'm paying everyone back. That's my first goal. So I'm trying to get a job. At this point, two DWIs, I'm a felon, broken arm, girlfriend broke up with me. Like, it doesn't get worse from the

situation. I was, I mean, it does, but it was a pretty bad situation, you know? I dropped out of school. Like, who wants to hire this guy, you know? Walking in with a broken arm, like, but I'm trying to apply for every new where I can. And I get the job at this skate-themed taco place as the lowest position in the back just boxing tacos and I just keep grinding my way up and making YouTube videos after work. So then I create the series where I learn a new trick every day for a month. So I'd get off of work. I'd race to the skate park and I'd daily vlog every day. So that kind of was like the beginning of the momentum on my YouTube channel. and then I just kept doing these like crazy challenges on my channel just I don't know just got

bored them or I don't know yeah so every so with skateboarding and then would you talk to like during the videos and put in your your personal stuff you were going through and things yeah a little bit you know I'd be like oh just got off of work got like two hours left sunlight I would do little anecdotes here and there about being sober or coffee I was think I had no caffeine at the time You know, so nothing crazy, though. And I talk about details of the trick, just anything, you know, normal daily vlog, completed that. And then I was like, how could I top that?

And I was like, I don't know, that was crazy. And then the year later came up with the idea to learn a new trick in every state in America 50 days in a row. So once that hit me, I'm like, is that possible? Can I drive to each state and like learn a new trick? is there enough time in the day? So I became obsessed like I usually do. Mapped it all out and booked a flight.

I was like, all right, day 49, I could fly to Alaska, day 50 to Hawaii. This could work. So just went for it, had no money, started to go fund me, and just figured it out, just like went for it. And kind of caught on a little bit, nothing crazy. And people donated and helped me, you know, have enough money to do it. Yeah. Another crazy experience. You know, it's like we were saying before, you just like these levels, you know, where something doesn't seem possible, you know, and then once you break that, the next one, you know, the closer you get to it and hang around it, you're like, oh, I don't know, just become second nature at some point. Yeah. Just like I could do that. So you ended up finishing that challenge. You did a different trick and all the states. All 50 days. 50 days in the row, wild daily vlog. logging and uploading the whole time, completely solo.

Okay, I was going to ask that to do, is there? So you would fly to each state? No, no, I drove to all 48, and then the last two I planned to fly to and left my car in Washington. Okay. Yeah, so I would drive like sometimes eight hours, you know, to another state and then skate the skate parks, talk with the locals, put them in the video, and then like learn my new trick. And then edit it, upload it, you know, go to the hotel, like all that stuff, every day.

That's cool. You know what's really cool about this story there, too, is what I'm just picturing here, is when other people believe in your challenge, your mission to do it, and they support you with making it happen. That's one thing I think that feels really good. Yeah, no, 100%. And like, that actually, for me, some people think of that as pretty. pressure, like, oh, I'm announcing I'm going to do this. I almost feel like it's the opposite. Like, it gives me the fuel and makes it easier that everyone's there and a part of this thing now. Now, I can't bail. I got to do it. Yeah, that accountability. Yeah, exactly, right. Wow, man, that's wild. That is wild. So where do you go after that, man? So you're working on this

YouTube stuff. I mean, you're still working at your job as well? Yeah, making tacos. So simultaneously, I'm working my way up there, becoming a server, which was always awkward for me. You know, so I wanted to get better at YouTube. So my goal was to learn how to publicly speak, you know, and like talk with people and, you know, get better at that. So that kind of all helped. I kept moving up there. Now I run their food truck. Just keep doing that.

And then I just kept doing the YouTube videos, which led to how am I going to top the 50 States challenge, which was skate across America. So yeah, that came to mind and I just locked in. I started researching, has anyone done this before? Like, is this possible? And that just consumed my life. Yeah. Okay. So you figured it out, but let us know.

Had anybody done this before? So people have done it with other people where they were kind of doing like a relay. So like one guy would do five miles and they'd switch five miles kind of like that or some people would skate and maybe stay somewhere for a week or two and stop, but no one did it cleanly with the Guinness, you know, measurement. So technically it's like the first legitimate crossing. Wow. But, you know, people have like journeyed across with a skateboard. Yeah. Wow. Okay. So take us through that journey. I mean, what does that look like? Where do you start? Okay. You just start, well, you start pushing. So you push and you push.

like five miles and then your body's killing you. You know, like five, ten miles. You're like, this is crazy. And then you just keep doing it, keep doing it. You break in your body, 10 miles, 20 miles. You know, I'd go down to a nice long bike path and just eventually I worked my way up to 50. Wow. I was like, all right, if I could do 50 miles in a day, if I do that for 60 days, that's two months,

you know, 3,000 miles across America. So I did 50 like one or two more times and I was like, I think I should be able to make it across the country if I keep this pace. Then was the planning. It's nonstop researching what routes. Am I going to run in the mountains? Like can a skateboard even make it over a mountain? You know, which is funny reflecting back on when I was drinking.

I hated solving even the. littlest problems. I get so frustrated by like little things or like credit card things. I would just avoid it and like throw everything away or just like, I thought I was like Zen, like, oh, I'll let it go. Like who cares? You know. But it's really just was like avoidance, you know?

And then getting sober actually made it easier to keep facing these things and building that momentum in a positive way. So I don't think I'd be able to ever conceive doing something. something like this without the sober eyes, you know? Yeah, no, I was going to, I was going to say that too. Like the sobriety is not, you know, all of this journey for you, but I definitely, like, from hearing it, I would, I would guess that it provided that space in your life, that confidence in your life, and sort of that curiosity.

I think that's like a strange thing that comes from sobriety is we gain confidence, which in turn makes us willing and believe that we could do other hard. things, you know? Yeah. No, for sure. And like, I feel like it brought me back to being a kid. Like, what I loved about life. Like, what excited me, you know?

It's like, you slowly fade into, like, that adult life and you're drinking and it kind of gets washed out. And I don't know. There's just something beautiful about, like, I don't know, I feel like a little kid still. I'm still doing YouTube videos, still skateboarding. You know, I got my job and I'm a little more, like, in a comfortable place. I guess, you know what I mean?

But like, yeah, instead of, you know, the insecure place I once was, you know. Yeah. It was much,

much different. That's wild, man. And I think when I see that, when I saw the Tony Hawk thing, you, maybe I'm wrong here, but you had the same set of wheels for the trip.

Is that true? Yeah, the whole, whole time. Yeah, yeah, it's my obsessive tendency coming through again. Uh,

so I thought it was funny because I brought an extra set. I was going to change him halfway. and they started like turning almost into like cheese. Like they were disintegrating, you know? My viewers were like, you're going to kill yourself. You're not going to finish it. The wheels are going to explode. And I'm like laughing because I kind of know like they'll be right.

And even if they do, I'll just take a battle roll. I've been falling skating for 20 years. It's nothing. But everyone's losing their minds. Like, please change them. So I thought it was kind of funny. So I was just leaving them. You know?

Yeah. And then three quarters of the way, I'm like, I think I could actually just make it the whole way. That'd be so funny if one set could just make it. Like to me, that was just interesting. I didn't care if it was slowing me down or not. Like, that just seemed funny and interesting. Then the last week, I kind of regretted it because they were like not even rolling

on the axis anymore. You know, they were just so chunky. But I'm so happy I did it because it became this like, like people were coming out on the road to just see the wheels. You know, they were like their own character. And then, you know, Tony Hawk ended up wanting to buy the board. And it became like this thing. So in hindsight, it was reckless, but I don't know.

To me, that's what made the whole trip and what makes life interesting. Yeah. Yeah. Where is the board at now? He has a little, um, his own private museum at his office or his house. And it's in there with like, like 10 other boards. Wow.

Insane. That, dude, that's crazy. Yeah. So where'd you sleep at? Like, did you just sleep in the woods? So my goal was to hit my 50 mile mark every single day. Then my next goal was I got to find a hotel. So, all right, let me look on my path.

All right, there's a super eight, 60 miles. That's where I'm staying the night. So that would be like my goal for the day, basically, you know? I just based everything on trying to stay there. And I'd charge up my phones, edit my vlog, ice my feet, put them in like a garbage can filled with ice, and then start over again the next day. Yeah. And where did you start the trip and where did you end the trip?

So I started in Venice Beach and I ended in Virginia Beach. Wow. Yeah. And people came out to see you at different stops. Yeah. And it ramped up as it went along. Like it started picking up speed. and towards the end there was like, I don't know, I have to count, but like 50 or 100 people were

skating with me to the finish line. The police blocked off the bridge in Virginia Beach and they were like following me and blocking traffic. It was like, it was surreal. And then at the finish line, the mayor was there. They set up like a banner and I'm just like, I just couldn't believe it. And I was replaying my whole life of kind of everyone telling me I'm, crazy skateboarding, dropping out of school, being aimless, you know what I mean? Like all these things, like just replaying in my head as I'm crossing the line, you know? It was a pretty interesting

experience. Wow, man. Throughout that journey there, I mean, did you share like in the vlogs, too, about your struggle with alcohol? Was that any, was that part of it? Yeah, 100%. Yeah, I introduced, I knew being out there making daily vlogs. Well, first, I donated the whole trip was built around this nonprofit called Natural High. It helps kids to find a passion to focus on rather than drugs and alcohol. So like basically what you were saying before, like dare, but they didn't really give you like the solution necessarily, you know, or a solution. So natural highs in all 50 classrooms in all 50 states. And they help kids find something they love to shift that attention to.

So the whole trip was basically to fundraise for that and bring awareness to addiction and sobriety. Yeah. Wow. What did you learn about yourself? Yeah. I mean, being out there for so many hours, you can't not look inward. You know what I mean? You're just in the middle of the desert for 12 hours straight. Like, you're going to have to look in. And that's what I love. You know, I love just,

um, yeah, just learning about all the reasons why I do things. You know, all my tendencies or understanding falling outs from the past that may have been my fault that I held to grudge about or something, you know what I mean? Like, you'll just get hit with random thoughts from all over. You know? Yeah. Oh, yeah, I can imagine, right? That just kind of doing it on your own in everything.

But I mean, finishing that, what have things looked like for you since then? So since, I mean, on the outside, it looks exciting. You know, you got like Instagram and, like, you know, news stories and things like that. But basically, my life's still the same. I still work on the taco truck and still skate, make YouTube videos occasionally. And just carrying out, you know, just doing what I love and continue. Yeah. No, that's awesome, man. And where are you at? Are you still in Long Island? Still in Long Island, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, actually just got married like four days ago.

What, dude. Yeah, yeah. Like everything, okay, well, that's, dude, that's incredible, man. Yeah, which is another thing that changed because my whole life, I was like, forget the system. I don't need the government involved. I don't need anyone to tell me that I need like, you know, I'll love you for the end of time. I don't need like something to put a stamp on it, like a legal document. You know what I mean? And I was just like so against it, you know. And I think through being sober, I've learned to examine some of my old ideas or hangups, you know, reevaluate them and also be more open to other people's situations. And if they're interested and they like, you know, my wife really wants to have a wedding, it's like sometimes it's good to make sacrifices, you know? Yeah. Almost always. It's good to

make sacrifices. Yeah. I mean, that's what that's what it is. That's so exciting, dude. I mean, it seems like too throughout all this. I mean, for you, it's a constant place of growth for you, right growing learning and even that that trip of like looking within and maybe a transition from where you kind of shared before about you know struggling in that sense and then to a place now because it can be really uncomfortable and really challenging to look within right because none of us are perfect and you know we've all taken wrong turns and sometimes looking at that in I think not only looking at that but looking at our part in different situations and I think It's such an incredible point that you bring up that sobriety allows us that space to heal.

And for me, anyway, to say, you know what, like I've been wrong in a lot of places in life and I've heard a lot of people. It's made a lot of bad choices. But moving forward, I understand my role in those decisions. And I can change my behavior moving forward to, you know, not live like that anymore and, you know, make things a little bit different on this side, man. And it sounds like, you know, that's something that you've went through as well. well. Oh yeah. Yeah. And I'm still going through it. Still learning. It's a never-ending learning curve.

And I feel like all these challenges I set for myself and even the sobriety, what it does is if you face difficult situations often, all other situations kind of pale in comparison to it. So if you're continuing to push your limits and like, you know, just keep growing, keep growing, it almost makes all the problems underneath that, like you're almost not even acknowledging them anymore because, you know, they've gotten easier in comparison. It's like lifting weights, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Like after you get to, yeah, you build up to 300, like, you know, 50 pound weight doesn't seem as hard anymore. Yeah. Yeah, where, yeah, where you started out on the journey, whether weight lifting or sobriety. It's like, yeah, I mean, at the time, that it can seem like it overbearing, right? Like, oh my goodness, how am I

going to get through this, but you're right, man, as you, as you knock down those walls, it's like, not as, um, it's not as difficult moving forward. Yeah, and you got to have trust. That's like, you know, the way I viewed the world and that like nihilistic mindset, I didn't even think it was possible to be where I'm at today or to even have like this, like, positive view of the world. I just trusted that those actions would eventually pay off. So you might not see it immediately. you know, in the first couple weeks or this or that. But like, that's the hardest part is in that space before you get sober, it feels like

hopeless. It's so far away. Why am I going to do this? It takes a year, two years. Like, but it takes some time to build, but I've found it's always worth it, you know, for anyone I've met who's done it. You never hear of someone that's like, you know, regretted it. Like, what's the worst?

You can always just try it and then reevaluate, you know? Yeah. No, I'm with you. I've never heard anybody who's like, dang it. I wish I never, you know. The only thing you kind of do here sometimes, and I don't know if it's regret from people, but a lot of people share that, you know, I wish I did it a little bit sooner, you know. And I think, too, like, man, what an incredible point to hit home as we wrap up here.

It's like that blind trust. The things are going to work out and that we're on the right path, whether it feels like we are or we are. or we aren't at the time. It's another thing I love is people float around in sobriety a lot. This two shall pass. Yeah. You know, like we're going to get through it. Feelings come and go.

Like, they don't last forever, right? So, like, if we're having a tough day, we get a good rest. I find in my own life of them having a really tough day and I get a good rest. I feel energized and I can really start to tackle stuff. And I don't need to just run an escape anymore. Like, it's okay if I'm struggling. It's okay if everything's not working out. I'm just going to stay in the game.

and things will turn around. 100% yeah. And as time goes by, for me with the sobriety, that just like it kind of shrinks and shrinks, the problems become much easier, you know? I'm thinking, Chad, before we sign off here, man, if somebody's struggling to get started with their sobriety or they're in it too, right?

They're in that first year. And maybe it's not making a whole lot of sense, right? Is this worth it? Is it worth sort of the struggle of what I'm going through? What would be your message to them? man do figure out look inward and figure out what you love to do more than anything in this life what you're interested in or it could be who you love or whatever it is that to me is like the real disconnect so if you're sober and it's not quite clicking or you don't have the motivation

to jump in the sobriety fill it with something like equally as exciting and for me that was like oh i'm going to do youtube this thing i have like always hated you know i actually used it to call my own bluff. I was all about nothingness and nothing mattered. So when I got sober, I said, all right, so if nothing matters, do the thing you hate the most. Go do YouTube. You know? And it ended up being like where the answer was for me. Yeah. That's great, man. Yeah. I love that. I mean, do kind of what you're most afraid of, too, in a sense, right? Yep. Yeah. Yeah, 100%. Do what you're afraid of, there could be an answer there if something sticks out to you like that, there's usually something underneath. Yeah, I love that too. I mean, look within, right? I think too,

we, you know, it's good to have support. It's good to have community. It's good to be connected with other people. But I think we have more answers than we realize, like within ourselves. You know, I think we have to do a little bit of digging to get there. But I think that we have a lot of those answers that we can figure out to about who we want to be and how we want to show up in this world. use a lot of those things when I find myself in a tough spot like who do I want to be at the end of the day and you know I've got three kids and I saw this quote thing the other day that you know one day your kids are going to figure you out you know and that's so true that's so true and it's up to me about who you know when they figure that out what what do I want them to see and how do I want

to live and I think it's really since becoming a father it's become something that is important right to set the best example, right? Like, dude, being a father, I'm far from perfect, man. I'm learning every day, right, with all of this stuff. But just to try my best, I think, is, and it kind of shifts over into sobriety and just being a role model and, you know, just showing up in the world to give back. Yeah. And not only that, I mean, your kids, like, yeah, they'll figure you out, but also they're

going to inherit all your behavior subconsciously. They're around you all the time. That's where their world is formed. It's from your behavior. behavior. So not just like they're going to figure you out. They're going to also pick up your mannerisms and your behavior. So the better you are, the better they will be inherently, you know? Yeah, beautiful man. Anything else, Chad, before we sign off that you want to mention? Yeah, I have the Skated Cross America photo book coming out a couple of months. So anyone that

pre-orders that, I'm going to be doing a giveaway for, it's like a photo print, giving away I wait 10 of those. But yeah, other than that, that's it. I really appreciate you having me on. It was a great conversation. Yeah, of course. So this is pictures of your trip? So it's basically, so I got Tony Hawk.

He wrote the foreword, which I still can't believe, you know. And then I kind of go through each day and talk about a couple of paragraphs, my emotions, challenges I faced, people I met. So I include all unseen iPhone photos and professional photographers met up with me also. So that's scattered throughout the book as well. Wow. Okay. And one last question, and then you're out of here.

I'll let you off the hook. Did you write these paragraphs like every night at the end of the day? Or is this something you went back and reflected on? I had no time during it because I was doing daily vlog and like 10, 12 hours a day. So I wrote all this in reflection. But having all the vlogs and the photos helped. I looked at it and I could just recall like all the emotions pretty quickly, you know? Yeah.

Wow, dude, that's incredible, man. Well, thank you, Chad, so much for hanging out today. Thank you so much for having me out. I appreciate it. Well, there it is, everyone. Another incredible episode. Thank you, Chad, for jumping on the podcast and sharing your story with us, incredible stuff. I'll drop Chad's contact information down on the show notes below, as well as the link to join us on the Suburmotivation community.

I hope to see a few more of you there. Until next time, I'm out.