Sober Motivation: Sharing Sobriety Stories - Manny was told he had 6 weeks to live and nothing could be done to reverse the damage alcohol had done.

Episode Date: February 10, 2023

Manny was told he had 6 weeks to live and was so confused that nothing could be medically done to improve his situation. Manny had many close calls over the years of his life and alcohol was not helping.  Manny was drinking daily and going without was not an option but it wasn’t always that way alcohol slowly became the #1 priority.  He got another chance at life and is making the best of it everyday. This is Manny’s story on the sober Motivation podcast. My Fight Our War Facebook Group Sober Motivation on Instagram

Welcome back to season two of the Subur Motivation Podcast. Join me, Brad, each week is my guests and I share incredible and powerful sobriety stories. We are here to show sobriety as possible, one story at a time. Let's go. Mani was told he had six weeks to live and was so confused that nothing could be medically done to improve his situation. Mani had many close calls over the years of his life. And alcohol was not helping. Mani was drinking daily and going without was not an option,

but it wasn't always that way. Alcohol slowly became the number one priority in Manning's life. Mani got another chance at life, and is making the best of it every single day. This is Mani's story on the Suburmotivation podcast. How's it going, everyone, Brad here, before we jump into this week's episode, which is incredibly powerful. I just want to say thank you.

By the time this airs, we will have. have reached 100,000 downloads in just over three months. So thank you so much for the support. The main goal here is just to let everybody know that sobriety, recovery is also possible. Reach out for help if you need it. There is tons of support and people willing to help you on your journey, help you get started and help you stick with it. You don't have to do this alone. There are people who will help. Now let's get to Manny's story. Welcome back to another episode of the Sober Motivation podcast. Today we've got Manny with us.

Mani, how are you doing? I am doing great, Brad. Thanks a lot for having me. Of course. My pleasure. How we start this podcast is what was it like for you growing up? Well, my parents divorced early, but I was surrounded by nothing but love from other family members. So not an issue there.

I had a real good childhood and loving family. So, you know, can't complain. the younger years were really good. Awesome. Yeah, I hear that story a lot, the divorced parents. A lot of the podcasts I've done, that's been part of people's story. For me, it was almost the opposite because we had such a close-knit family that the rest of the family, you know, just stepped in.

And so I was very fortunate in that part. Yeah, no, that's incredible. What was school like for you? school, I was never, ever a good student. I went there. I loved people in socializing and sports. Education, not so much, which reflect on my grades, but mainly sports was my thing instead of taking advantage of the learning curriculum.

So, yeah, I wasn't the best of students. Yeah, same here. Same here. So what was it like for you when you started drinking? I was always very fortunate growing up because sports was a huge part of my life. So when my friends started branching out and experimenting, I was so in depth. My biggest thing was hockey. I played hockey from my third or fourth grade all the way through high school, juniors, and all that.

So I was lucky in that aspect. Drinking came into play when I was about 15 years old. And it was more of a social thing because my crowd was mainly, the jocks and the athletes. So there was that that really helped me. But at the same time, at the parties, it was alcohol. But even at 15, a few beers, which, you know, at 15 you should have anyways. But it wasn't an issue I didn't think at that age.

But that's when it started, 15 years old. And it became more and more available. Yeah. And how did things progress? It progressed actually pretty slow with me. I was fortunate. Like I said, I did have a lot of friends in my circle that, and this is back, I'm 57, but I was an 80s child and all that. So we had marijuana, ecstasy, the mush. I mean, you know, the crack cocaine and all that stuff wasn't around yet. But I did have friends that were experimenting. And I was mainly, you know, a few beers here and there at parties, maybe a couple times a month as I started getting a little older. And this was until after high school, 1819. is where I definitely noticed it because I always hung out with an older crowd. Younger playing sports, I was fortunate and I was good at hockey.

I always was put up a couple levels. So I was always with older people. And so when I, 15, 16, I had friends that were 1920. Well, there you go for the alcohol. And then when I'm 1920, it just became more and more available. And that's when it definitely became noticeably more of an issue. Yeah. What do you mean by that, noticeably?

Well, it went from the weekend party after a hockey game, you know, or every other week, something like that. Then it got to be, well, you know, it's the weekend, which met me at your buddy's house and, you know, get a case of beer and drink that before you go to the bar. So you don't spend as much money, which was all high because you just drank twice as much there. Then it became, well, it's Wednesday, it's dollar night. It's Friday. It's ladies' night. So these were all just little excuses to go to the bar. And next to you know, instead of drinking once every couple weeks, it was once or twice a week.

And instead of just a few beers, then a few beers in a shot, it was an evil little process that kind of snuck up. And I didn't even realize it because I didn't think it was a problem at the time because the friends in the circle I was with were all doing the same thing. What was the rest of your life outside of the drinking? What did that look like? It was good. Like I said, my family life, you always hear it with drinking. Not always, I shouldn't say that. But people, a lot of times, you know, people like me, you know, I'm an alcoholic, like to, when the first stage is, it's always someone else's fault. Well, I had a bad childhood. Well, I had this and that. For me, that wasn't the case. And it's just, it was very good, stable. My mob remarried to an absolute amazing man. Amazing. Amazing. amazing man supportive and hockey is very expensive. He jumped in without hesitation, took on a future wife and a son. So I was blessed. I truly was. What was the reason you think why you were going out to the bar and why you got wrapped up in

this crowd and why it was progressing? I think for me it was actually the jumping up in the age group that I was in because of sports and all that. I was, it was really a good thing in some ways, but it was actually my doubtfall because that's what was going on. So I was kind of following the crowd because, you know, even in high school here, I'm a freshman playing varsity sports, you know, with seniors. So I'm trying to live up to their expectations. Now after school, I'm with guys.

I'm 18, 18 years old, but these guys are 20, 25 years old. Now I'm followed their lead and they're popular. They're the end guys. They got the girls. I'm like, hey, you know, peer pressure. And I didn't think it was an issue, but it sure was. I didn't even realize it. And that's it just became more and more relevant as the years progressed.

Yeah. And what did that look like, though? So you're 18, 19, 20, 25. How did your NHL career go? Was it actually? No, I didn't. But I, you know, Michigan boy over here. here, so of course you always hear Michigan, Michigan State and all that. And the last thing you

ever want to hear is Ohio State. Well, I was fortunate enough to actually get a call from a coach from Ohio State, and I was offered a scholarship to come out for athletics. Coach came out, we took care of all the stuff, and unfortunately, I had quite a few injuries throughout my career, even as young age, and I always had knee issues. Through the training program, I had blown out my knee a few times at least to say it was an athletic scholarship so that went down to drain the trainers were great tried to help and one of them was like you know well maybe your grains we can do something i was like dude yeah not my grades so unfortunately the downfall was just my body gave out at a young age and i've had so many injuries and surgeries but that was the extent of it i made it to that level

and then actually did play juniors and a little bit you'll be on that but no no NHL Well, that's still incredible. I mean, that's a great journey, right? Oh, and you know, yeah, yeah, I wouldn't have traded it for the world. Yeah, awesome. So when did things take a turn? I mean, this part, what I'm hearing right now, this part of your drinking career is fairly manageable up here. Drinking a couple nights a week, your life's probably not completely falling apart at this point.

When did this stuff start to take over or did it start to take over and affect other areas of your life? It did. And that was probably in my early to mid-20s, probably early 20s is when I noticed it, because now I'm 21. I mean, before, I mean, I've been drinking since 15, but you know, got to go to the right place. Make sure your ID. But now I'm 21. I can go anywhere anytime. So there was no stopping me.

And alcohol isn't a illegal drug. So in my early 20s, like I said, I was definitely fortunate to be part of a very popular in crowd, the athletes and all that. And we were, I mean, party after party after party. And I noticed I always like to have fun. I always like to get the center of attention, just go out there. And then I started noticing, well, you know, I have a few beers, loosened up a little bit. And well, then all of a sudden, a few more.

Well, let's throw a couple shots in there. Well, nice of you know, people laughing and carrying on. And that in my early 20s is when things started. I could tell that there was issue because now, instead of once or twice. There were just like three days, four days in a row. But not only that, all of a sudden, waking up, hungovers can be, you know, the old,

I'm not doing this again. By the end of the work day, you want to go grab a, you know, hair of the dog, yeah, let's do it. And next thing you know, calling into work. You know what, I'm just not feeling good. You know, and my dad had to say, if you're sick, you go to work, unless you're dying, then you can go to work a half a day.

If you're hung over, you get your butt to work. You did it yourself. But now my drinking was affecting my work. And I started missing days. And so it was a slow process, but it started getting worse. Relationships started not being as thoughtful as caring and then not caring about things that I may do, you know, hurting people. And I've always been very sensitive. And now is more about me and starting to get very selfish.

Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. The selfish part, yeah, because you're worrying about what's in it for you and when the next one is going to slide across the bar type deal. Yeah, and that was it too. And the thing is, the more, I mean, you get people that, you know, these are my friends, they're buying you rounds. They're laughing at your stupid jokes.

They're the yes people. the really ones that love you are the ones that are listen Maddie you know slow down man you're you're getting a little you're worrying us a little oh come on you'll just just get off my back you know you're just giving me a hard time you know you're just because you can't do it you're not going out where these other people at the bar are feeding right into your needs and that's where mine just started

you know more and more like I said now missing work affecting relationship missing family functions which was not me, Christmas holidays, I'm all in. Well, it's Thanksgiving. I got a stomachache. You know, you lie to yourself. You lie to family. And that's definitely when I noticed there was an issue.

Yeah. Who was it in your life that pointed out that maybe this is not so good for you? That would be my mother. A very, very strong, faith-filled woman. I mean, she is just a saint. but what happened was the more she would intervene. Our family was a big drinking family, all our events. And when you look back at birthday parties with me and my cousins

when we were our first birthday, second, all you see is table full of beers. You know, the adults, it was just party time. It was acceptable. That's the way it was. So we were around all that. And as mine started to unravel, my mom was the first one. And I'm like, that's your mom.

You're supposed to give me a hard time. My friends were drinking just as much as me. So, of course, they weren't saying anything. And towards when this all happened, I had a very close family member, a cousin who tried to, he was the first one to reach out and say, listen, this is more than a social thing. You got a freaking problem. Yeah. And how many years did it take before that happened?

That was, well, 20 years or so, 30 years? Yeah, it was about 20 years of just, you know, slipping through the cracks, you know, saying the right things. But the whole time you think you're getting away with saying the right stuff. But a lot of times you're drunk and you're forgetting things. And you're lying, but mainly you're lying to yourself. And so, yeah, it was a long road. But the one thing that didn't change, what I'm sorry, that did was the drinking. It was always usually beer for me, but then liquor, you know, the last probably five years or so, liquor became huge.

I couldn't get enough, which was not me at all. So then instead of buying a six-pack and maybe a pint for a shot, it was, let's buy a fifth. And so, yeah, the last few years were very ugly. Yeah. Were you a daily drinker? Gorge, the last probably, I'm going to say, it's, you. You know, an alcoholic and an addict will always subtract years. It's like, how long have you been having a drinking prop?

Oh, two years. You know what? Add about 10 more onto that, you'll maybe be right. So for mine, I'm going to say the last five years before this happened was an issue. And that's when it was daily. Now, as far as the liquor, like literally buying a fifth, that was probably the last three years. It was bad where it was daily. And I'm talking a fifth.

You know, it started out as a pint. You know, I took baby steps on my path to alcoholism. I didn't jump right in. But yeah, towards the middle there, I went from a pint right to a fifth and a day. And then it got even worse than that. Yeah. So if you tell us five years, like you said there, should we add 10? Do you know what?

Or is five years, or have you put some thought into it, you've narrowed this down to five years? I thought I did. You just brought that up, and I'm kind of thinking back right now. And for me to say that is probably me lying to you and myself and trying to believe it. So, you know what, tacking out another couple years would not be unrealistic at all. Because if I'm saying, you know, oh, that's five years. Yeah, that's when it became an issue. If I think that that became an issue then, there was definitely an issue before that.

So, you know, you're right, Brad. let's throw on another couple years just to be safe. Yeah, I think too there's levels to it, right? Because even when you first started, even in your 20s, I mean, there's obviously issues with it. When you're 18 or 19, it's illegal. You're doing some level of risky behaviors, like probably not enormous ones, but you're taking some risk that other people don't do. You know, and then there's levels to it. And then you kind of graduate in a sense to this other level of stuff where things go

to a whole other level. What is it you were running from, though? Like, have you ever been able to get into a place of understanding for that? I have tried. You always think about that. What is the cause? Why didn't I do this? I've always been involved in relationships. That's another thing. This drinking costs me relationships to make very bad decisions. And I've been engaged three times. and I'm really good at getting engaged, but it's that next part, and I've always kept things inside my feelings, and, you know, the things in my personal life that, like I said, is my time when I was with the police department. You know, some of the things that I saw that I was involved with are very haunting. After that, like I was telling you, I rode with a very well-known Detroit

motorcycle club, and the things that were done, the PTS. SD, the nightmares, they're all part of it. And it's just, it's a vicious cycle. And so that became more and more relevant. Yeah, I think you hit the nail on the head there too. You were managing this maybe in a way that wasn't the most productive, but it wasn't also the most dangerous. And then some events happened, some things happened, and that could have maybe triggered something where you needed more and then it just kind of keeps going. It was that vicious cycle. And then, you know, of course, like you said, the things that happen, it's like the black house or the mood changes. Well, that was just one time.

Well, next thing you know, driving and looking up and seeing those flashing lights behind you, well, the next thing you know, I mean, that wasn't happening a year ago. So it's progressed. Now you're getting pulled over. Now you're not only getting tickets, you know, accidents, possibly killing yourself, killing somebody else. You know, I unfortunately had that experience where I was involved in an accident. And I have been pulled over.

I have been arrested. And even with that, you try to make excuses. And you can lie to everyone. You can't lie to yourself at the end of the day, but I sure is hell tried. Yeah. Wow. Many. A lot of stuff unpacked.

It's been a journey. So you shared with me before about how you ended up in the ICU. Let's start at the beginning of that story. So you kind of touched on a little bit, I think, about how you upgraded to a fifth day and that that daily thing like are you not working at this time when this happened unfortunately my father was diagnosed with ALS and I ended up moving and sold my house moved in with them to help take care of dad so I was basically living there didn't have to worry about anything but take care of dad and now I'm in this environment where all I'm doing is

taking care of him meanwhile being the alcoholic and drinking at the same time and that's when things really started to unfold, noticing, you know, the dolls I'm thinking about now as well, let's see, what time is it? It's pretty bad when you wake up thinking, oh, shoot, the liquor store doesn't open until seven, two more hours before they open before I can go there and get my bottle, you know, and that's unfortunately what it turned into. And it got ugly real quick. And like I said, it went to a fifth. I mean, I'd walk out of the party store, get into my truck. Well, first, buying it was an adventure as I put the bottle on the counter. and slid the money in my shaking hand to the cashier because the shakes were so bad.

And I'm still, ah, it's not a problem. I'm okay. Walk outside in the parking lot and unscrew that cap as soon as I shut the door and take a drink. And still thinking that it's not an issue. So that's what the last few years, or leading up to it, ended up to me all to me being transferred to the hospital. So that was the bottom line. Yeah. Walk us through that, though.

How did that play out? What was that they like? That day, the night before, I remember looking in the mirror, and I had a friend who was over and said, she was you, your eye, you're yellow. Your skin looks yellow, but your eyes are yellow, which I realized earlier the day. Being in the medical field, I knew. My best friend, God bless him. He's like, my brother, died at 40, drinking, liver failure, organ failure. Same thing.

So I witnessed that I was there with him. So I'm seeing the signs. So she's like, you've got to go to the hospital. She goes, you're going to die. And I looked up and I said, I know, I didn't care. So she left. That was the night before. The next day, I got up, went to the liquor store.

As bad as, and now I'm even worse, got overnight, walk in. The person there, they've known me. she looks at me she goes your eyes are so yellow and I just glared at her grab the bottle same thing park last are a guzzling went home then things get blurry and next thing I know I'm staggering around next year I'm in an ambulance go over here to Henry Ford McComb Hospital and that's when things get fuzzy from there with help from family as far as details I was within an hour so transferred to Henry Ford Main in Detroit, because they said there's nothing we can do for him. Henry Ford Main admits me, and I'm yellow as a banana.

And people say that we have certain colors that are good for us, we look good. Let's just say yellow's not my color, because I was ugly. And I don't remember most of it because the organ failure was so advanced. The liver enzymes and everything go into my brain, I was hallucinating. The intense pain from pancreatitis, they had me on very strong pain killers. so I was hallucinating from that. And like I said, I was in there, I think it was a little about 26 days. And within that time, probably 18 of them, I get rate or so were in ICU,

which I had a few times where I coded in there. And they actually asked me, what are your wishes? And I remember saying, do everything unless I'm plugged into the wall, let me go. They went out, told my family, they did revive me. And then it was probably two days later in ICU when this doctor, who was the organ specialist, came in. I named him Dr. Death. He had the personality of a doorknob. And so I'm sitting there. And he looks at me and starts giving me statistics. Well, I'm, you know, no condition for that. And he goes, six out of ten people with your numbers guy.

And I laughed at him. I go, well, you're talking to me. I'm glad I'm not at the six. He goes, man of your numbers are worse. He goes, there's nothing we can do for you. And I'm in the hospital room by myself, and he gets up and leaves. I fall asleep. His associate, the younger female walks in, and then when I saw her, I'm like, oh, shit, this is real. She goes, I know my associate was here. And I was like, oh, my God, I go, is this real?

She said, yeah. I go, please, there's got to be something you can do. She started to cry, and she said, no. I go, how long do I have? and she said less than six weeks. I just looked at her. No tears, no nothing. And she offered to stay with me until family got there.

I said no. And like you can imagine, there was a hell of a phone call to make. Family got there after they were informed. Hospice was brought in to take over my care and to go home and die at home. And the next few days I'm waiting and doctors came in and they're doing blood work. And they're asking me how I feel. I'm like, what, you're freaking for a guy who's going to be dead in six weeks? Not too bad.

And we're going to keep you for another day or two. I'm like, well, what's going on? But they wouldn't tell me. But each day, there were more doctors, more doctors. Finally, five days later, the room is packed with doctors. And I'm like, what is going on? And Dr. Death is smiling at me. And I go, you are an evil SOB, man.

You tell me I'm dying and you're smiling. he goes manny i'm sending you home but not to die he goes the reason we've been doing all these tests your numbers have stabilized and now only that they're going back to freaking normal it's nothing we've done there is no drug no miracle pill and i was sent home and by the grace of god i'm here talking to you and um every day is is a blessing and that's it in a nutshell i know i've probably skipped a few details, but every time just, it's been three years. January 27th, it just passed marks my three-year anniversary of sobriety, but it also marks that three years when I was told that I'm going to be dead in six weeks. So it's a bittersweet day. I shouldn't say that because I'm here. It's a

great day. So that's it, Brad. I know I've been babbling and I apologize, but this story affects me so much, and I want that to get across to the listeners. I want them to know that no matter what, man this fight isn't over till we decide it's over and an addiction is evil it's a coward it attacks but it's nothing that we can't handle together it's a fight that we can win yeah so true powerful story there manny thank you for sharing that i'm wondering too though i know you were a little bit out of it because everything that was going on it but were you able to comprehend and how did you feel when that's what you were told of like six weeks.

I can only imagine that we always see stuff on TV. We always hear these stories around us about people coming back from stuff. How far advanced the medical field is? How did you feel when they're just like, we have all of these resources to help all these different people, Manny? And we're so advanced, but we don't have anything to help you. We can't. It was the strangest, most empty, alone feeling that I've ever had my life.

I said, for one, I'm in this hospital room by myself. And after the doctor, she left, and I'm sitting there, like I said, there was no hysteria. There were no tears. I just was staring out the window thinking, I'm going to be dead in just over a month. And then when I asked her, I said, please, there's got to be something. And the only thing left was a liver transplant. In order to have a liver transplant, you have to be free from alcohol. I can't remember if it's six months or whatever it is,

but they put it through to the transplant team, which immediately, you know, he hasn't been sober two days. No, he has to wait, which obviously I couldn't. It was my death sentence. But that feeling, you nailed it, Brad, you see it on TV. They walk in, you know, the tumor's malignant. You have less than this, and they call their family the hugs and tears. When I woke up that morning, I can honestly say I did not think I was going to be told that.

And believe it or not, that wasn't the part that scared me. The scariest part it was at the end when they said I was going to live. But obviously alcohol, I couldn't even look at a bottle. That's the part that scared the hell out of me because it's like, how am I going to live? That's all I knew was drinking, partying, wild lifestyle. I'm like, this is what's going through my mind instead of, oh, my God, I've been given a chance. I'm like, how can I survive without alcohol? And, you know, this is COVID now.

This is three years ago when COVID shut the world down. So when I got out, I was supposed to have intensive rehab. Well, the world was shut down. So I went to the organizations and they're like, we're closed. If you have suicidal thoughts, go to ER. So I never had any meetings. I never had a sponsor. I never went through any type of organization at all.

I had nothing because COVID shut down the world. So I've been blessed. I'd never had withdrawal. I'd never had cravings. It was like alcohol never existed in my life. And if that's not a true blessing, I don't know what it is. I have been so blessed. And now my mission is to give back.

Yeah. So how have you been able to stay on this track? You don't ever think about it or reminisce on the old times of how we do such a good job convincing ourselves, Manny, about how good this was. Do you have that or is that last experience in the ICU cancel all that out? You know what? I'm not even sure if it's that. I can't explain that.

But the thing is, I still go out with the crazy lifestyle I had. I was part of that. That was in me, my day before drinking. It was just part of me. But I still go to the casinos. I still go out and, you know, with some of the fellas. I still, you know, in some of the same circles. But what do you have?

I'll have an Arnold Palmer. And the thing is, there's alcohol all around me. And I've been blessed because it doesn't bother me one bit. When I first came home from the hospital, I had friends of family who were recovering alcoholics that were, listen, I've been sober for 20 years. You have to get a sponsor. You have to call them once a day. You have to go to meetings at least five times a week.

You have to do this because you're going to feel withdrawals. You're going to feel panic. And it was two, three weeks later, I felt none of that. But the thought of going and sitting in these groups scared the hell out of me. And actually it was like, that's going to make me want to drink, just the nerves. And so what works for them doesn't necessarily it's going to work for you. And I never had a craving. And I still go out, like I said, casinos, parties, alcohol everywhere.

And I'm very blessed and lucky that it doesn't affect me. So what does work for you, though? Because like you lived sort of a wreckage past in a sense there. and you've brought up some stuff, you know, the heavy stuff. So have you been, do you work through all of that stuff? Yeah, for me, it's actually stuff that I've done in the past that I'd never even realize how much that did help out. I love training, hitting a gym is something I've always loved doing.

So I'm there, you know, working out quite a bit. And now being part of the group that I formed is that's 100% of my life, practically, is helping others, talking. Getting the word out that this isn't anything to be ashamed of, man. This is something that we need to stick together. We're part of an elite group. We are alcoholics and addicts. We understand what we're going through.

So what better people to talk to than ourselves? We try talking to family and friends that don't understand it. They mean well, but sometimes cause more damage. So my biggest thing recently has been the organization, the family that I have now, And it is amazing. Like I said, I still have been so blessed not to have cravings. I see daily family members in the group that are struggling and just reaching out, talking, not lecturing, just talking about the family, the friends.

It's amazing. The feedback and reception of this, just talking and sometimes listening, not saying a word, just being there makes all the difference in the world. Yeah. You're talking about this group. What's the name of the group? This isn't a group that I formed. It's called My Fight, Our War, and you can go to Facebook and request a membership.

And I have always, from the very first day, I said, we are family. And it caught on like wildfire. When you go to the site and you see the post, it's always like, good morning, my family. And everyone is so supportive. And it started out as a thought four weeks ago. I had no name or anything. I just started thinking and that I'm like, my fight, our war popped in my head.

And I go, how fitting? Because addiction and alcoholism is my fight that I'm dealing with. But addiction overall is a war that we all battle. So that's where the name came from. I started this site up. And next year you know, there's like 13 members. And now it'll be four weeks this Friday. And right now we're at 560.

And it is. just overwhelming. I have never like talking to people. I have never like being in front of a camera. I've never like being on a microphone, which I know right now, you're like, this guy won't shut the hell up. And it is just taking over because this is, this is my life. This is my passion. I am not going to stop until we get the word out that addiction is something that we can fight together. It's not a death sentence. You know, I beat this and others can too. And that's my mission now. to grow. And then this stems back to you, Brad, you guys, I reached out to you. And you open arms brought me in and just seeing your format, listening to your podcast. It's like,

okay, Manning, it's time to step up or shut up. And so I thank you for that because if it wasn't for you, sober school, sober motivation, you guys were the first step and putting me where I am right now. And so I appreciate that from the bottom of my heart. Yeah, I love all this, buddy. Thank you. Thank you so much. It helps to hear that things make a difference, right? And I'm a firm believer too. The community changes everything, getting connected with other people that are on the journey or have been through the journey and be so powerful because when we're wrapped up in it, we feel like, or should I say, I felt like I was the only person who was burning his life to the ground. And no one around me understood. And once I got out of my own way and started to ask for help, I started to meet other people who had burned their life to the ground. And the most beautiful thing about it was they were rebuilding. And they showed me that that was possible to do and it completely changed my life. So that's incredible.

I'm wondering here, I have a question here. And this might not even be the right way to ask it, but let's try. Do you ever wonder why you got a second chance? And I kind of do the quotations because maybe this was a 20th chance. We don't really know the whole thing. But why many? Why did Manny get this opportunity that we can't really explain medically wise anyway? Yeah.

And the thing is, it's so far you said that about, is this the first? It's not the first. I have been blessed a very good friend. And he's like, their family to me. Unfortunately, their son lost his battle with addiction and died. Before that happened, we and him would talk about my situation, and he went for a walk one day, and he goes, Manning, he goes, you're going to beat this. He goes, you're one of the strongest people I know.

He goes, you should have been dead four times already that I know of, and you're still here, and you're here for a reason. Unfortunately, this hero lost his battle and is no longer here, but I think about those words. I was involved in an altercation where a gun was shoved right into my face during the fight and he pulled the trigger. The barrel slammed into my face

and shattered my cheekbone and I got a plate under my left eye. I'm lucky to be here. About a year later, I was involved in another altercation and I was stabbed with a razor knife next to my left eye the same eye. Multiple fights, you know, broken bones, very out of control,

violent lifestyle that I should be dead. I had sepsis hit me one time because of an IV of all things at the hospital was improperly inserted. I'm being rushed to the OR because the vein was so infected. They said, we're going to do all we can, but we don't know if you're going to make it. So this is not, I mean, and why me? It's like survivor's remorse and guilt. You know, my best friend, Jerry, I crawled into his hospital bed. when he took his last breath holding on to this, my brother,

who died from Oregon failure from drinking. Why him? And now my question's answered, because I'm here right now with these amazing people like you, like sober is cool. You know, my fight, our war, I have met the most amazing people. And we're family, all of us, just like you. You know, I feel part of, you know, we're family.

And it's amazing what happens with family sticks together. And it's a beautiful thing. Yeah, wow, incredible. Yeah, definitely a lot of close calls for you, Manny. Yeah, yeah. I don't know if you're familiar with the Detroit area. There's a center called the Father Solanis Casey Center in Detroit. And actually, I'm sitting on Mount Elliott.

I was just there before our interview started where I go and I pray quite a bit. And my faith is just, is I am so blessed. And I was here about three and a half weeks ago when this all started, you know, praying. And, you know, they say sometimes things happen and you're blessed with the hand of God. And the feeling that I have, like I said, after you guys realized there's something to this. And the feeling of the inner peace from helping people starting this and being part of the solution, not part of the problem. It's just overwhelming. And I'm trying to get sleep. I sleep maybe two hours a night. I'm on the phone because I've got family members part of the group that are from

the Netherlands, Holland, New Zealand, Ireland, that are part of this that are contacting me, talking to me. And I'm just amazed and grateful. And again, I know a broken record. It all stems from just, it could be that one person. And that was you. And that was sober school. And so you did that for me. It's my time to step up with my fight, our war. And just like I was telling you, man, if there's any way that we could help out and do our part, I'd be honored and grateful for you. Yeah, of course. I love that. Yeah, it's all about giving back service, service, helping other people see that there's hope. You know, that was my whole motivation behind starting this and starting everything is to never wanted people to feel so alone or so trapped or so hopeless like I did. So I wanted to

or something that people could maybe hear their story or a little bit of something that they could relate to that they're like, hey, if so-and-so can do this, like maybe it's possible for me. And that's what the S2 is sharing stories and especially your story so powerful and everything, and then coming out the other side and, you know, three years later without it,

when going through it, that was probably just a long-lost thought maybe somewhere on another planet that this could ever. be possible. And it's really strange too because I've been having a lot of these conversations. And a lot of people are sharing about this window of opportunity that's coming up. You know, like this window kind of opened up and they climbed through it at the right time. And it's making me think about all this because a lot of us relate our sobriety or our recovery after a rock

bottom incident, right? So we're like, hit a rock bottom and then I got sober. And that, that works. I mean, that's some people's story, but I'm hearing this other story where this window just opened up and people just went through it. It's just interesting. Oh, and you know how you hear those stories that it literally happened overnight and people like me are like, yeah, still, that doesn't happen. I'm living proof, man. Yeah, that's the truth. It's been a blast, man. I really appreciate you coming on here and sharing your story. Oh, well, I tell you what, man. This is the first podcast I've done in my life and I would not trade it for anything. Thank God I did it with you.

Another incredible episode. Huge shout out to Manny for sharing his story. And if you want to be part of his community, be sure to check out his group. Wow. Kind of out of words on this one, to be honest, Mani got another chance, and he's making the best of it.

Thank you so much again, Manny, for sharing your story on the Subur Motivation Podcast. We'll see you next time.