Sober Motivation: Sharing Sobriety Stories - Scotty Soprano struggled for 2+ decades with addiction. He lost a friend to an overdose and knew things had to change. This is Scotty’s comeback story.

Episode Date: March 21, 2023

Scotty Soprano got sober on Feb 2, 2022.  Scotty struggled with drinking and other substances from a young age. For around 22 years Scotty was never able to string together a week of sobriety and the consequences kept adding up. Scotty lost his father and the drinking escalated. Scotty began trying to escape by doing drugs he never thought he would. A very good friend of Scotty’s passed away from an overdose and he knew things had to change. This is Scotty's story on the sober motivation podcast. ----------------- Follow Scotty on Instagram HERE Check out Sober Link HERE Follow Sober Motivation on Instagram HERE

Welcome back to season two of the Subur Motivation Podcast. Join me, Brad, each week is my guests and I share incredible and powerful sobriety stories. We are here to show sobriety as possible, one story at a time. Let's go. Scotty got sober on February 22nd of 2022. Scotty struggled with drinking and other substances from a young age. For around 22 years, Scotty was never able to string together a week of sobriety. and the consequences just kept adding up.

Scotty lost his father and the drinking escalated from that point. Scotty began trying to escape by doing drugs he never thought he would. A very good friend of Scotty's passed away from an overdose, and he knew something had to change. This is Scotty's story on the Sober Motivation podcast. Before we jump into Scottie's story, I just want to give a big thank you to Soberlink. Soberlink has helped us out with some of the editing costs for the podcast.

What they do is truly incredible. And if you have a chance to check them out, check them out on soberlink.com. They are experts in remote alcohol monitoring. Welcome back to another episode of the Sober Motivation podcast. Today we've got Scotty with us. Scotty, how are you? I'm doing good, man. How are you doing today?

I'm well, man. And I'm happy to connect with you on the show today. We've been going back and forth for what seems like months now, and I'm glad that we were able to figure this out. Yeah, man. It's been a good journey, man. You know, as soon as I stopped drinking and stuff, I remember just searching sober.

And I saw sober motivation pop up. And I was like, who is this? What is this? And I got to follow everything this guy does. And you've been along the whole ride for me. So it's been good, man. Awesome, dude. How we start off the show is what was it like for you growing up?

So, yeah, growing up, I was pretty good. as a kid, I think it's going into high school is when everything really changed for me. My parents split up going into grade nine and stuff and that really messed me up. My dad was always there and he kind of really, really got me going with the drinking and stuff. And I had no control over it since day one. I think the first time I ever used, I was probably about 12, 13, smoking weed and stuff. And I loved it. I loved the feeling.

I loved escaping and like just being somebody else, you know. And it was just like a feeling that was unmatched. And I just always wanted to feel that way. So, you know, after my parents split up and I got into just smoking a lot of weed and drinking every single day, dropped out of high school because I didn't really have anybody telling me what to do. And that's when my addiction really, really took off. Yeah, for sure. So did you stay with your dad when your folks put?

Yeah. So I had the choice to go with my mom and my dad. And I stayed with my dad because I'm like, yeah, like this guy parties, you know? And like, I'm not going to have any rules, right? And, you know, looking back on it now, I actually thought about it recently, like, how my life would have changed if I went with my mom instead. So it started out for you in high school, grade nine, beginning of high school. Yeah.

For a way to escape what's going on with you. Yeah, I changed a lot. Like that year, that summer break was when everything kind of went sideways. I started getting rested and stuff like that. I got arrested when I was like probably 14. I was super drunk. I had a knife on me. I had weed and all this stuff back then.

And I just stopped caring then, you know. Yeah. And this all just started at that. You don't have any other stuff go on before your life that like everything was just playing out how it was supposed to kind of deal. My dad was an alcoholic, but he wasn't like physical or anything like that. You know, like he was the regular working guy that drank every day came home and he was happy and fun and stuff like that. So I guess seeing drinking wasn't really a problem to me until later. in life. It was just at the beginning. I just saw this guy that went to work, came back, had some

beers and went to work the next day, did it all over again. Yeah. So what were your relationships like in high school? Were you hanging out with the outlaws or what? I was the outlaw. I was that guy. I stopped going to school completely as soon as I had the choice. I just couldn't mesh well. Like, you know, all my courses were academic, which is harder courses. And I wasn't really too good with that. So I was just failing already. So I was just like showing up to school to not go to school, of thing. Yeah. And then who we're hanging out with? Other people that weren't going to school or older folks? Yeah. All the older folks. Yeah, just the wrong bunch of crowd for sure. Yeah. Yeah. I hear you on that. I've heard that story like that before where people are dropping

at a school and then other people your age are still in school. So you kind of gravitate to other people who might be a little bit older and out of high school or stuff like that. You think those are the guys that are cool, right? They got the car. They got everything, right? You know, you're just starting off and you don't have anything. So they try to push you in ways that you shouldn't really go into directions that, you know, they're not really looking out for you. They really don't care about you at all, right?

Yeah. Where did things progress? How did the rest of your 18, 18? Yeah. As a teenager, I started really, I don't know if I could say about, I was stealing cars. I got into a police chase and they actually hit me in my car crash and stuff like that. And it was like huge thing.

and I was drunk when it happened. I just kind of remember waking up on the table and the cops are there and my dad's there and they're cutting my shirt open and stuff like that. It broke my leg, I shattered my jaw. That's when really went downhill because I couldn't walk for a couple months and I just sat around and I don't know if I'm allowed to say this either, but I was selling drugs, right? So I was selling a lot of drugs and stuff. So I was just kind of sitting on my ass doing nothing.

And the money started rolling in. So it just went with that. I lived that lifestyle for a long time. I wasn't in high school. going to high school just to sell drugs turned out for the worst for me, you know. Yeah. So you're sitting at home. You're selling drugs.

You're going to the high school to hang out. You got in this car chase. What was the car chase all about? So you got drunk and stole this car? I had a car that was stolen. I was out of town. And I used to steal cars all the time back then. And, you know, this is just one time just before I could even have my license.

I was like 15 or something like that. You get your license or you're 16. I was driving and the cops just saw me. I was like, fuck that. I just start going. And they start chasing me. So it was a long pursuit. And then eventually they hit me.

And then I crashed into a hydro pool. You know, and I flipped like seven times. And I was real messed up after that. Damn. Yeah. That was, yeah, 15. Yeah.

And did you have a thought then of like, hey, you know, Scotty. Yeah, it's pretty serious, man. We should turn things around here. Yeah, not really. I was just like, fuck them kind of thing, you know, like, didn't care.

I remember waking up in the hospital. and I just kind of jumped up like it was nothing. I'm just like, I got to get out of here kind of thing. And got home. I eventually went to court for it. Got like two years probation. My life's spending for like five years. A bunch of fines I had to pay and stuff like that.

After that, it got a lot worse. Yeah. What did your dad say about it? He was just really concerned for me. He was just worried and stuff. And like honestly, I hate to say it now. Like my dad passed away. But like I never really got any type of.

discipline over it. It just kind of went away. He was just there and he was kind of on the same page as me. You know, he just didn't really care that it happened. And, you know, he should have been like, you shouldn't have done that kind of thing. Like everything was kind of cool. Like I remember smoke weed the next day kind of thing with him and drinking with him. My jaw was wired shut. I remember drinking. I couldn't even open up my thing. My mouth is crazy. Yeah. Wow. So then after that, I was selling for a long time and I was kind of like getting. my life in order a bit. So I moved out. I was living on my own when I was 18 and I was like, I got to work. So I start working selling drugs. I got another job. I was working like crazy

and stuff was going good for a long time. I had the two steady jobs. I got promoted to manager. So I remember thinking to myself like I'm trying to change my life. You know, I'm not trying to be that guy I was. So I was like trying to dress nicer and just be a different kind of person. And that didn't really work for me. It lasted a couple of years, especially with the drinking. I remember I stopped smoking weed and I was just strictly drinking there for a while. And I try to limit myself during a week and I'll be like, okay, maybe just six beers on a Friday. But then the six beers is going to like 12 beers or a bottle or whatever. And it just always got worse for me, right? Yeah. And how old are you then when you got these jobs and you're

running the show? So that was like all my 20s, 20 to 30. I'm just kind of coasting in the middle for a long time. You know, like I was doing pretty good. I was saving money. I was going on trips. I had a house. I had a good relationship. Like, if you looked at me, I looked pretty good. But at the same time, I was drinking every day. And I was getting like pretty much black out on a lot of occasions. But I was still waking up going to work. So I was a very functioning alcoholic. Yeah. It's interesting too, because I kind of can pick up on some of that story of your father. That maybe that was like a little bit of how he was doing it too, right? 100%.

It looks like it's okay, but it's really not. I tried so many times to quit. You know, and I'm just like, okay, I'll go a couple days, but it never lasted. Why were you trying to quit? Did you see that there was a problem? It was always something, a fight, I got stabbed, my house got raided. It was always something happened to me, right? Like something bad.

Friends, like friends getting shot around me, like literally, really bad stuff. Yeah. And that was all from what, drinking? Yeah, I had a pretty bad crew that we were hanging around with. Like, we were all not in high school. Well, this is even later, but like it's the same crew that I kind of grew up with. None of us really had any discipline around us. So we were kind of just running the streets wild, you know,

and doing what we want until something serious would happen to one of us, right? Yeah. So how did things look after that? Was there ever a time when you like looked in the mirror kind of thing and say, Scotty, you got a serious problem here. Let's do something about it. ever reach out for help or did anybody ever offer you help of any sort? So when I got arrested a couple times, I got probation, I had to go to AA.

So I'd go to AA, go to the class or whatever, get the paper sign and leave. I wasn't paying attention to a word that was said. All the times I've ever went to any sort of treatment or anything like that, it just didn't click for me. It was a lot later when all the bad stuff kind of happened. When COVID hit for me, I got laid off from my job. I was a chef at the time because all the restaurants closed down. So I started sitting at home doing nothing.

And that's when I really, my addiction hit rock bottom. There's just no work, no income. I stopped paying rent. My girlfriend left me after nine years. I let my buddies move in with me. My house became a trap house. It became, you know, like the cops were here every single day. I had writing all over my walls, holes in every door there was.

It was a disaster, big party house. And that's when I started using drugs I thought I would never use. I used cocaine like over the years here and there. But then I got really hooked on it, waking up, going to a liquor store, getting a bottle of whiskey, getting a bag. And as soon as I got in that bag of blow, it just really turned me to a different person, ripping off friends and cheating on the girls I was with all that's like the worst came out of me. Yeah.

And that was at the beginning of COVID. Yeah. Because there's a lot of downtime, right? especially for your profession there. Yeah. And then also that my dad died. So then when he died, I just really stopped caring. That's when I started using other drugs that I've never even done before.

You know, and I remember sitting there thinking sometimes, wow, I can't believe I just did that. When I was coming down, those come down to really emotional to the point where I was like, fuck, I feel like killing myself. This is not the way to live. You know, and I was just really, really out of it, man. Like the cops were at my house like every day. Literally, like, I got this disclosure one time and I had like 45 complaints in October for one month, right? My birthday month.

And it was just like the neighbors hated me and I couldn't get a job. I remember like applying everywhere. Then as soon as I finally get an interview, I'm too messed up to show up. I couldn't keep my job anymore. I saved a bunch of money from before and I was like, when I stopped working, I blew all of that money. I had like 30 grand saved up of my own money. And I blew it in a matter of months. And then I started going to muddy march and stuff like this.

Pretty much owing every place I could money just so I can get something to get me high. And I was just unemployable, couldn't keep a job, you know, changing friends constantly because I was just like ripping them off or whatever it was, right? It was a horrible time, horrible time right after my dad died and COVID. It was just like the super bottom that I hit. Wow, Scotty. That's heavy, buddy. It was a horrible time. Yeah. for a lot of people too i think for COVID for different situations and different reasons like the isolation

that it kind of forced us into it was a big challenge for a lot of people right your meetings you normally go to and you know all the other stuff you're kind of restricted right all of a sudden yeah that's the thing so i wasn't even going to meetings back then right at all but i had a couple friends that were like also addicts but they're like you need some help man you know you need to go to like a rehab treatment or you can try these meetings these online meetings and they'd send me these Zoom meetings and I'd be on there like wasted out of my mind not paying any attention it wasn't working for me then you know I needed to go into the physical rooms and I remember sometimes I was coming out to after hours and I was just like cam H was right

there which is a treatment center and I finally finally had up the confidence that I'm like I got to go in there like this is the time right now while I'm all messed up I go in there I snuck some drugs in and I got kicked out literally I remember I remember getting carried out of CAMH with four security guards thrown onto the street at like 10 a.m. Just looking up, I was like, wow, I am not doing good right now. To get kicked out of a rehab is horrible. Yeah. I just kept thinking my life has to change, my life to change.

But, you know, I just kept going back to the same thing. It was just like, all right, whatever. I didn't die. Let's get high again kind of thing. Because that's the way to deal with your emotions. You want to drink. And I was coming home to a party house. everybody they don't give a shit what I was trying to do. They didn't know I was trying to stop

and stuff like that. So it didn't work for me for a while. My whole life, it didn't work. I remember when I was 14, I got charged with having a knife on me that they sent me to AA. And I remember thinking about that later on recently actually where I was just like a judge notices when I was 14 years old that I had an alcohol problem then. It just shows you how long that I've had this problem in my life. To be, I'm 36 now. So that's like, what, 22 years I've had this problem. It was just one thing after the other over the years. What was it doing for you?

That's the thing. I never had like a horrible upbringing. It wasn't really bad. So it's just like there's nothing I was really trying to hide. It's just I do believe in genetics and stuff like that. The alcoholism runs in the family and stuff. Just growing up, seeing it around me. I just liked it.

I enjoyed it. It was fun. It was fun to be drunk, you know, and just not care. And I enjoyed being that person. And people kind of liked me for a long time. Yeah, that's the thing that I found too was it was a very cheap entry to social situations, to building friendships, to meeting people. And then when I got sober, that was all like a little bit more difficult because I had had

this like, oh, you drink, let's go do like and then you're already connected, right? But when you're not doing that, it's a little bit more challenging to build like genuine relationships with people. It is. I realized a lot of that stuff later on. And like at the beginning you think everybody's your friend. It's like, oh, let's go for drinks and you love everybody, you know. And next thing you know, it's 3 a.m.

and they're telling them some random guy you love them in your kitchen, right? Yeah. Never see them again. Yeah. Maybe for the better. Maybe not. Who knows, right? Definitely for the better.

Yeah. So I'm just trying to piece all this together here because you're going through this extremely challenging time. I mean, you share it here. You're a very charismatic person. You share this story with us here. Other people can't see it, but you have a smile on your face. Big time.

With some of the stuff, right? And I'm trying to think, like, this must have been a very painful space and place in your life to go through. It was. Yeah. How are you able to look at it a bit differently now? It's now I have the freedom from the drugs. The drugs don't have a hold of me anymore. I'm doing what a lot of my family members have died from.

I'm beating that addiction. And every day, I feel grateful to be out here just smiling and have my neighbors not think I'm an asshole anymore and I have a good job and a good relationship and everything everything around me my life is great you know since I came into recovery everything has gotten better yeah that's beautiful yeah you hear it a lot too you give up one thing for everything and then you get everything back right yeah exactly how do they say it giving up everything for one thing or giving up one thing for everything yeah that's what it is yeah and then things just kind of get better walk us through what it was like for you when you decided to get sober and what that day was like and how it all

played out. My friend, he was a guy I used to party with, very similar to me. He loved to drink. And then he'd start kind of getting into harder stuff like Coke and stuff. And anyways, he moves in beside me. I haven't saw this guy for years in the building next to me. I run into him one day and he's not doing good. He is looking really rough, like homeless. He got into fentanyl. and crack and meth and all the hard drugs. And to see him like that, compared to the person that I knew, I was just like, whoa, it was just completely eye-opening. He was struggling, and I was also struggling.

So what it was, he used my phone one day, and he called his sister and said, can he let me 20 bucks or whatever? The next day his sister texts me, and she says, hey, I'm dusty sister. Do you know if he's around there? Can you help me out? This and that.

So me and his sister met up, and we were kind of talking. She was super concerned. So my fiance now is in recovery, but she's coming up to four years clean this year. So she knows all about the rules. She really wanted that for her brother. I was just trying to talk to her and stuff like that, trying to take her out for dates and stuff. And she was obviously not going to be a guy like me because I was a complete animal.

And she was just like, you know, you should come to this meeting sometime. I was like, all right, whatever else show up. I show up to the meeting. I'm wasted out of my mind. She's like, introduce yourself. So I introduced myself. My name's Scott. I'm an alcoholic and an asshole and an addict.

I didn't know what to say, you know? So that was my first meeting. And that was in the park. She was the one that introduced me to the rooms. And after that, we started talking here and there, but there's nothing ever. And then we did eventually get together. Starting in January, we were going to meetings together with their other two brothers that were all addicts, but one was into heavier drugs.

one was just doing drinking and stuff. So we were sitting in the back of the meeting. She's chairing the meeting. We're sitting in the back, not paying any attention. And we tried to go into these meetings every week, every Monday. We would go together. And we'd have three of us in there. The one day, he didn't make it to the meeting.

So we come home from the meeting. This is me trying to quit. So I've been on and off. I'm not using every day. I'm drinking half the time. We come home from the meeting. We get a call from her brother that her other brother has over We go over to the house and he's laying there dead.

Trying to bring him back. The paramedics are there. The paramedics rush us to the hospital and he's pronounced dead there. And I just had this feeling like, wow, this is insane. This is somebody that I use with is dead now. You just overdose and I need to stop right now. After that, my girl was in a really bad place. I ended up coming home.

Everybody was still partying at my house. I told them what happened. Nobody really acknowledged it too much because they're all out of it as well. I had one beer and I got offered drugs and I turned it down. And that was the last day I used. I was February 22nd of 2022. The last day I did anything. That's February 2nd or 22nd?

February 2nd, 2022. Wow, huge congrats on that. Just had my year and my sober buddy app told me, I had 400 and whatever days. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah. Man, just hearing that, I'm just thinking, man, that must have been, that must have been really hard to see that, to go through that and to know, I'm kind of thinking, and I

could be completely off here, but I'm thinking that you had some sort of vision of your future self being in a very similar situation if you kept down. 100%. I would have been there for sure. 100%. The way I was going. I was using drugs. I swore I would never use.

I literally lost my mind. Cops came to my house. I'm yelling at cops. And I didn't care. I really just didn't care anymore. And then where I was at now when I saw it, I'm like, this guy was just like me.

I can't believe it. It was pretty crazy, man. We went to meetings like literally the next day after it happened. And we sat in there and it's just like, that had to be my wake-up call. Is that what I needed to stop? To literally find somebody I called my brother dead. when I think about it now, I'm just like, wow, that was crazy.

Yeah. Yeah, after that, it's just, everything kind of clicked. I was like, I gave it like 100%. I hated the meeting, to be honest. I didn't like them at all. I didn't like the people. I came in, everybody's happy. Everybody's hugging.

You know, I'm coming in there depressed, suicidal, trying to mean mug everybody and stuff like that. Until I started hearing people share their stories. I remember I was at one speaker meeting. And they're like, oh, yeah, it's a speaker meeting. I'm like, what the hell is that? And they're like, oh, some guy comes up and he talks for about half an hour. Kind of similar to what we're doing, telling our story, right?

And I sat there and I was like, wow, every single thing this guy said clicked with me. I was like, I've been where this guy's been. And this guy was getting a year. And I was just like, whoa, that was, I've never met anybody besides my girl at the time that had any sort of clean time that had recovery in their life. I never met anybody. All my friends were addicts. I thought that was just like so far-fetched. for somebody to quit drinking because I've never in my life.

I saw my dad fail at it a bunch of times, once you rehab never worked, right? So, yeah. Wow, powerful. At what point did you believe that this could be possible for your life? So I remember right away, I was six days clean at the time. And we went out for fellowship,

which is just like going out afterwards with a bunch of people. And somebody just really believed in me. It's like, you're six days, you're right to beginning. this and that he just went off and I was like wow this guy believes in me you know I've never really had that before and I never really made sense so later I was like wow six days was a lot because I haven't made it a week in 20 years probably just having that guy believe in me really made it seem possible yeah well yeah that's powerful too have you reversed the roles and believed in somebody that's new all every day I'm the guy that's talking to everybody now I got two

sponsors I work with so I'm sponsoring people and stuff and I try to be the person I tries to figure these guys out. What was it like when I came in here? Where's their head at? Do I come up and I just give him a hug? Do I tell them I know this shit sucks? I try to play it by ear when I see these guys, right? Yeah. Read the room.

You see a really good room reader. I'm pretty good at the room. You know what? I'm pretty good, like, especially with newcomers. So I started up a meeting on Thursdays right by the detox. And I saw a lot of newcomers every single week, every Thursday. I'm right there and I'm talking to everybody. because I know what it's like.

And these guys are meeting me now, now that I have a year clean. But they don't know the guy that came in here a year ago. That was just like them, completely broken. Yeah. So I try to just show them that, like,

you know, I was in their shoes and I know what it's like. It sucks. You don't want to go and nobody really wants to come to these meetings until you actually enjoy them. Do you see these miracles happen in front of you? Yeah. Like,

when I make my videos and stuff like that, like I wish I could share half the stuff that I see in the room. But because of anonymity, we keep everything on to ourselves. You see some really miracles happen then, like every single day. Yeah, and you've been the driver in your own story, which is a miracle in itself.

Yeah, it's been really good. So like, I think one thing that got me connected, so when I met that guy at six days, I asked him to sponsor me, and I've never had anything like that before. So the guy sponsored me, and I started just staying really connected

and doing the recommendations. People are like, you got to do 90 meetings and 90 days. You got to get a home group. You got to do service. And I was like, you know what? I'm with all this. Somebody suggested that they had this convention.

I was like, you know what? I'm going to come. I went there and I remember driving out there with two people I don't even know. And I was just like, okay, what am I doing? This is going to kind of suck, you know? And I'm like, I'm only two months clean at the time. So I'm like still pretty messed up in my head. I'm not like, okay.

Yeah, you know? So I get out there and I was like, whoa, this is insane. There's thousands of addicts out. year and we're all together. And they did this thing called the Clean Time Countdown, where they start at 40 years, who has 40 years, who has 39 years? And they go 20 years. They go all the way down to one day.

And when that room starts going under a year and you got like 200 people cheering, oh my God, you felt the energy. And I was just like, I'm so grateful I went to that because that was like so, you can't match that energy anywhere else in the world. It doesn't matter. Somebody wins a Super Bowl, nothing like that. because these are people whose lives were ruined. They had nothing left that came into these rooms and the rooms saved their lives.

It was amazing, amazing time. No, that's incredible. I think I saw a picture or you shared a video or something when you jumped up in the chair. Was that the convention? That was it, you know. I was out there and had dances and stuff and I went to the dance. I was like, oh, okay, this is not really for me. I'm not here for this, you know.

But it was awesome. They had a meeting that went 24 hours a day. so you pop in there, do whatever you want. And somebody made me chair a meeting out there for my first time. And then I was like, okay, this is kind of cool. I'm like the guy kind of in charge, you know? As soon as I came back, I was like, boom, let me get into the service. Let me chair.

I want a chair. I started chairing every time I could because my home group was Monday. So every Monday I'd want a chair. It's not like I'm like the king of the castle kind of thing. It's just like people are coming up to you and talking to you. Thank you for the service, helping us out and this and that, right? So it felt really good to get connected. And I connected really quickly because everybody also knew my girlfriend, but now I'm here.

I'm doing this for myself. They could see that I want this. I started working the steps. I'm at every single meeting there is. I got a car. I'm driving out of town, different cities and stuff. And yeah, man, I got to know a lot of people. My birthday came.

I had like 50 people come to my birthday. And like none of the people was people I used to party with. It was all new people. It was awesome. Wow. What is surprised you most about your journey in the sobriety part here? It's a surprising thing. I feel like just life.

Life is just good. Like every day it's just something new. It's just like what am I going to do today? Like I have this today and then also later on I got therapy. I'm doing therapy, which is things that I thought I'd never do in my life. When I started working these steps and stuff like that, that's one of the things that surprised me, I guess, was because I've never really done any self-reflecting on myself. I barely read when you get clean time to give you key tags. I didn't even have keys for my key tags to go on.

I didn't have a wallet. I didn't have a phone. I got all that stuff back. When I sit down and I write all this stuff about myself, where I think my life went wrong, what was wrong with me as a person and my shortcomings and character defects and all this kind of stuff was like, that was kind of cool to sit there and write that all down

and then sit there and take it up with somebody with a guy that's like, has some clean time over you, and he knows the stuff. And for him to be like, you know, well, you're kind of being a dick. Maybe you should change that. You know, just all the self-reflecting on yourself was just, it was just really eye-opening. I did the amends. You know, I made amends with a bunch of people.

I even did, I ran into my cousin. I had to do an amends with him on the weekends, you know? It's just like these things in the steps are just things that it doesn't just happen overnight. This is stuff you do for the rest of your life. Yeah, so true. road to recovery is always under construction, as Luke once told me. Yep. What would you say if somebody was struggling to get or stay sober?

They're sort of on the fence. What could you give them? So what I do is I even offer guys a ride to the meeting because I know what it's like. You don't want to go and you'll find any excuse not to. So if you got somebody that's like, you know what, I'll give you a smoke. You want to go, you need a cigarette, I got you, we'll go to the meeting together. and that's usually what I offer guys that I find that are struggling. I usually try to offer them the ride to go with them and show them that it's not so bad.

When you go in there, you're obviously at your lowest, right? But I don't know. It took me a couple of months to get it to figure it out. I probably don't have it figured out at all, but I have it better than I did. I feel pretty confident when I walk in the rooms now and knowing everybody and just knowing I can go there and just I could let my problems out so that they're not building up and people are listening and people care about me now you're not used to that when you're living that life of addiction you're used to like everything going the wrong way and like when you get sober and stuff your life changes for the better everything starts to become good it's really hard at the

beginning but it does get better i promise that yeah that's so true yeah because a lot of people do struggle with that hence why i think it's recommended 90 meetings and 90 days for you to kind of get a little bit of your head on your shoulders. Yeah. That keeps you really connected. When I got to my nine months, they called the nine months to your cautionary key tag,

you know, because a lot of people don't make it to the year, they relapse. And they're like, you should do another 90 and 90. So I did 90 and 90 well working two jobs. You know, I was going to work, meetings every single day.

And like, that kept me so connected. So after I got my one year, I would finish my 90, a week later. And I was like, okay, I can like ease up on the gas a little bit here. I can go to five meetings a week. I don't got to go to seven for now.

You keep bringing this up, though, this word connection. What makes connection so helpful on this journey? To know that you're not in this by yourself. You know, everybody that is here, we go there for the same reasons, right? We sit there, we hug at the end and we do our prayer. And if that's all I'm praying for, it's just to stay clean for the day or not drink. It works. You know, like the connection is in the room.

It's like, if I feel like I'm going to drink right now, I got 50 numbers I can call that will tell me reasons not to drink. I'm not in this alone. We're all in this together kind of thing. Yeah, no, that's beautiful. Yeah, yeah, I love that too because when we're in the addiction there, there's a huge isolation factor to where we feel like we're the only one, the shame, we can't figure it out, we keep messing up, and we beat ourselves up and then prevents us

from getting help or asking for help. Exactly. You just dig deeper kind of thing, right? Yeah, exactly. Well, Scotty, this has been incredible, buddy. What do you have here for closing thoughts, my man? If you're struggling and if you're in Toronto, reach out to me. I'll go with you.

I'll pick you up. I guarantee that. I'll introduce you some good guys. And if you ever want to go to the convention, the conventions in London and in May this year, it's going to be good. You know, recovery is possible. Miracles happen in the rooms. The step work is done at home. Life is a lot better.

There's some people that come in and they don't want to give it 100%. And, you know, for me personally, I like complete absente. I don't want to do anything that's going to alter my mind. You know, I want to do something that keeps me on the sober and not think of anything else besides what I want, right? When I start doing other drugs, even if it's like weed or something like that, that's going to mix up my mind, right? I want to do something that's the right direction that I need to go in, you know?

So that's why I stay 100% giving this my all and it's worked out for me. It's beautiful. Yeah. And you're getting married soon too? Is that what I'm getting married. Yeah, I did a lot last year, man. You know, I remember when I was. like six days clean.

Everything happened within a week. I think the first week nothing happened but after a week I was like, whoa, I got to start brushing my teeth again. I got to go to the dentist. I got to change my sheets. I got to paint my walls. I got to fix my holes. Started doing everything. Got my license back, got a job, you know. And I was like, this girl meant the world

to me, man. I never thought I could stop. She got me to quit. So I bought the ring and I was like, okay, I'm going to wait for the perfect time and asked all her brothers. And then yeah, we did it at Disneyland on her birthday. So yeah, it was pretty magical. Wow, that's pretty cool. How important has it been for you to have somebody so close to home support you on your journey?

Oh, it's the best. I feel like having somebody that's on the same path as me, like I had a guy at work today asked me like, your girlfriend doesn't drink either. I go, nope, you know? Because like some people, they don't really know me that I'm like an addict, right? That I love to drink. Of course I love to drink until it ruins my life. Yeah, like to have somebody that's on the same journey as me, it's just awesome because

we don't have the temptations. We go out, like we went to a basketball game last night and we're there for the same reason to sit down and enjoy the game, not to get drunk and have a fight and stuff like that. Yeah. So, yeah, that's so true. That must be awesome. Well, it's nice to have somebody, too, that believed in you from the beginning type deal. Like, that's got to be so powerful for you. Yeah, I don't know what she saw.

I wasn't going to say it. Scotty, I wasn't going to say it, man. Yeah. It's so funny. A lot of the people that know me now, they don't know the guy I, was right that's why i made that one video with me from the beginning to now right like i wasn't always this guy like smiling i never smiled before but yeah she definitely saw something and we fell into her lives at the perfect time to be honest because she got me to stop drinking and stay sober

and i was there to deal with the hardest time in her life when she lost her brother yeah it's like you can't even make that stuff up man it's insane yeah i mean it definitely seems like it's a two-way street now. You're both helping each other out to live your best lives, man. And I see you out there living your best life, man. I'm wondering though if you could finish off with one of your Instagram specials, man. Let me tell you something about addiction. Yeah. Tell us something. Let me tell you something about addiction. My guy Brad right here. So I'm working the step. We're spreading the message, not the mess. You know, I came in as a complete mess and I wanted to let everybody know my war stories. But the more important part about the mess,

message is spreading the gift of hope and recovery. Recovery is possible. Coming out here, doing stuff like this, this is spreading the message. Hopefully one person hears this that can relate to me. Hopefully a lot more. But if one addict can do it, anybody can do it because you're not alone. We're in this together. Awesome.

Love it, man. Scotty, thank you so much, buddy. Awesome, man. Well, another incredible episode. So grateful for Scotty to come on here and share a story. Scotty's really been through a lot and come out the other side. And I mean, the smile from ear to ear when he talks about the transformation that's happened in his life is truly incredible. Scotty's out there spreading the message of positivity and hope for other people that are still struggling.

And for those of us that are already on the journey to keep getting another day, thank you again, Scotty. And as always, if you enjoyed this episode or any of the episodes on the podcast so far, share it with two friends. also leave a review on your favorite podcasting platform and I'll see you on the next one.