Sober Motivation: Sharing Sobriety Stories - Shaz Didn’t Know What to Call It—Alcoholic, Binge Drinker, or Gray Area Drinking—But He Knew He Had to Stop

Episode Date: January 16, 2026

Gray Area Drinking, Binge Drinking, Alcoholism, Alcohol Use Disorder or Problem Drinking? How Do You Know When Alcohol Is the Issue. In this episode of the Sober Motivation Podcast, Brad sits down with Shaz to share a raw and honest story of alcohol's role, blackouts, secret drinking, and pandemic-era daily drinking. This conversation is for anyone who doesn’t see themselves as fitting with a label, but still feels uneasy about their relationship with alcohol. Shaz walks through how alcohol shifted from social use to binge drinking, how gray area drinking quietly escalated, and how secrecy, rationalization, and comparison kept him stuck for years. You’ll hear why waiting for a diagnosis or label delayed real change—and how sobriety, connection, and community support became the turning point. If you’re sober curious, questioning your drinking, or wondering whether life would feel better without alcohol, this conversation offers clarity, validation, and a path forward—without shame or judgment. Contact Shaz on IG: https://www.instagram.com/shazman07/  

Welcome back to season five of the Sober Motivation Podcast. Join me, Brad, each week as my guest and I share incredible and powerful sobriety stories. We're here to show sobriety as possible. One story at a time. Let's go. What happens when you've made it on paper? Family, business success, a new house, the American dream. And yet you're quietly falling apart behind closed doors.

Am I an alcoholic, problem drinking, binge drinking? or gray area drinker. These are all questions Shaz asked themselves in private. At times, Shaz felt that alcohol was given him an edge in life. This episode is about more than just quitting alcohol. It's about wanting happiness so badly that you'll let the old version of you die and discovering that the opposite of addiction isn't willpower, its connection.

And this is Shaz's story on the Sober Motivation podcast. Good to have you back, everyone. Happy 2026, our first episode. we're really setting the bar high for the podcast this year, kicking the year off with my buddy Shaz. You'll hear how we met and how we continue to connect to this day. This is an incredible story. Over 225 stories, I believe, here on the podcast, somewhere in and around there.

This one really hit, as a lot of them do. This is where I see the most people struggle. this is it is to where things are kind of going all right in a lot of different ways and Shaz will walk us through his experience but it was great to connect catch me at the end though because I have a lot more thoughts I just don't want to give away any of the story welcome back to another episode of the Subur Motivation podcast today we've got my buddy Shaz with us Shaz thanks for joining how are you my man my man looking forward to this I'm doing fantastic man how are you yeah I'm doing well man

I feel like it's been a long time coming for us to collide on the podcast. I think it's been a long time coming for us to meet. But yeah, collide is another word. Sure. So what was it like for you growing up? Yeah, man. I'm a product of the American dream. It's something I'm very proud of.

My parents migrated from their homeland, which is Pakistan. They migrated here to the States in late 1970s, 1980s. And they had my brother, who he is the oldest sibling and myself. So only two of us in the family, two brothers, we were grown up and born and raised in Chicago. So two things that I was raised with was you work your ass off for anything that you need. And number two, the Chicago Bears. So those are two things in our life that we live by. That being said, my dad was a immigrant.

My dad came to the country. He started up working in a factory. After you work in a factory, he worked for a few renter car companies. After the rental car companies, he then owned in Chicago. We call it medallions. They're cabs to say that. And then after that, he went on his way to open up businesses, which I'll get to later. But during this time, as my father was working, the one thing that was constant in his life was the lovely Miller light or whatever six-pack he needed in his fridge.

So that was one constant thing that I have to work, because he did work hard. He used to very much drink probably a beer or a couple beers, sometimes even a six-pack. I didn't really keep track when I was a kid because it didn't really make any sense to me. But he did that. Him and his brother were both drinkers. So my dad and his younger brother were drinkers. They were both smokers as well. So that's one thing that I saw constantly as my life is the beer habits and the smoking habits.

Is that a thing in Pakistan too? Like would that have been what they brought over with them as far as you know? Or something that was picked up here as you kind of work hard, play hard type idea? So that's a great question. Prior to this, I'm going to say life experience, which I've had, the last 12 months. I felt they picked it up here, okay? But I'm going to say this because I'm not going to spoil the ending. It is not true at all. It is something that is very common in Pakistan. And we'll get into that a little bit later. But yes, at that point in time, Brad, I felt that

they picked it up in America. And I actually felt that they picked it up in America until a few months ago. So yeah. So that was that. And then, you know, and it didn't really affect me in any way. I'll be honestly, my mom and dad, my mom used to work for a fast food chain for our entire life as kids. Can I save fast food chains on here? Yeah. I don't know if you can. I don't know if you're good or not. But she just actually worked for my entire, for my entire childhood in high school. She used to work with Popeye's. So she was from Popeyes. And my dad was obviously cab driver, factory, all that rent a car. So they were just two regular people just trying to make the best for their kids.

We grew up in a very small town in Chicago, not the highest income, the low income. town with family, everyone back. That was that. And then really, when it comes to me and my drinking, that started in the high school days. So I will tell you that I was not a drinker in high school. But if I'm going to remember my first drink ever, it was a vodka and orange juice screwdriver, which was disgusting. And I think that's the only time I had it.

And it was actually some really good premium vodka called Skoll vodka. that is not premium. That is like, that is like, that is the worst vodka you can have. But, you know, you got the sting done, right? You know, the vodka was throwing the orange juice. They got that sting done in my chest. I think what do they call it? Would you grow hair in your chest or whatever the hell of sweet things people say is?

So, yeah, yeah. And that was in high school then? That was in high school. I'm going to say, man, that had to be like freshman or sophomore year of high school. And after that first time, the only other time I remember drinking in high school was towards the end of my high school life, which was like junior year. I graduated high school a year early. So I just not that this matters, but I'll tell you is I went to summer school every summer because I didn't care so much to hang out with friends. And I said, I'm just going to go to summer school so I can get done with this high school thing early. So I graduated high school at the end of my junior year. But I remember I came back. for my senior year, just so I can walk with my friends. And the second time I drank was at a party where we were DJing at.

And there was this thing called Jungle Juice. If you know what that is, like a bunch of fruit juice with that, I think it's ever clear. And yeah, and needless to say, Brett, I got shit faced. No shock there, right? I got shit faced. But I remember, like, in a very awkward way, it was like, this is cool.

Like I got a little more confidence, a little more swag with the girls. And it was cool. right. But that was really the end of my high school, really nothing there that I can say that had the signs of what was about to occur for the remainder of my life. Now we kind of fast for let's go to college. I go to college. During this time, I am under 21. So as I graduate high school in that, my brother becomes 21. And I actually go ahead and think of the ingenious idea as, hey, I'm going to take his ID because I look like my brother. So I now have my

brother's fake ID and off to the races for drinking and bar hopping. So I am going to every bar, every place you can possibly think of because they think I'm 21. I look like my brother. It's a real ID, nothing to be harmed. So that's really, I think when my drinking career, I truly be, I think started was when I was in college, I wasn't 21, I went to all the restaurants. They have Daven Busters here. Where I went to college across the street, there was a Dave and Busters. So that's like an arcade place. And that's literally what we went for like lunch. and dinner. Like, hey, let's go there, play arcade games, have beer, and, you know, come back

to class, right? So, yeah, so that's what I did for college. Once again, it wasn't everyday thing. It was just maybe a once a week thing, give or take. Once I did graduate college, at that point, my father was still on his drinking ways, right? He was getting older, and he lost his eyesight and his eye vision. Not that he went blind, but he just couldn't see well.

So he had to give up his taxi cab business, because the way the cab business is work in Chicago is you take your cab to Chicago and someone else drives your cabs for you. You make money off of that. And he couldn't do that anymore. And what we found is that we had to sell his medallions as cabs. And once we sold them, we took that money and we invested it into a liquor store that was literally where my mom used to work at Popeye's. It was right next door to in the same parking lot.

So we bought that. We bought out. It was a tobacco store and then we made it into a beer and wine and then became a full-out liquor store. This is where the dream. drinking went up a level. And at this time, I was 21, above 21. It went up a level because now we have this liquor store and I have every single asset to me, right? Any of the new drinks coming out, any of the beers that are coming out, anything and everything coming out when it pertained

to alcohol. So I don't, I'm not going to say I got drunk every day, but almost every day there'd be a new liquor that would just be trying. Oh, this is cool. This is something deep, right? But it wasn't like to the point of like buzz. It was like, I'll try, you know, whatever. What it also was happening, though, is that during this time, in the, I think, five or seven years we had it, every single Sunday, we religiously would watch Chicago Bears football at my house. And guess who would bring all the liquor in the beer? This guy right here. So now I am the guy that's supplying for all the parties.

Any party we go to, she has to take care of the beer and the wine. And it was, I mean, honestly, it was great, right? It was great because I was like, I was the cool guy that had a liquor store. When you're the cool guy, they had a liquor store, everyone wants to be your friend. So yeah, that's where, as I said, not drinking for the buzz point of view, but I will definitely say drinking from a socializing perspective daily was occurring because that was just a part of my business. I used to work there.

As that happened, towards the end of my dad and my dad decided that, hey, listen, business is business, but I think that I'm done and I'm ready to retire. So we decided to sell the liquor store. Right when we decide to sell the liquor store is when I met my wife. So when I met my wife, we were literally at the end of the liquor store era. And we sold it and then I met my wife. And right now, I truly believe when me and my wife met and I got married, that stage, everyone knows the three stages of drinking. It's fun, fun with problems and then problems. And I truly believe that when I met my wife, the fun stage came to an end because now my drinking was becoming a problem because someone else could see it. So my wife does not drink. So I'm going to be very transparent.

My wife is not a drinker still to this day. So she just knows what she sees in me and what she might see in movies. So how old were you when you and your wife met? Oh, wait, I was 30. Yeah, I was 30 years old. Yeah. So liquor store is probably like 23 till the age of 30. And then, yeah, That was 31, me and my wife met. Me and my wife, just full disclosure, we are in arranged marriage. So the reason, the way that worked is, and our arranged marriages aren't like, you know, across the country, no. There was an aunt that she knew. I had an aunt that I knew.

It was all through our religious community. And they said, hey, we think you two would be a great fit. And, you know, obviously we met, hit it off really well. I knew her family was, the funny thing is about this is that her family was very strict. You cannot marry a drinker. Her family said that kid up said, do not marry a drinker. not marry a drinker because we see what's happened from our homeland and you should not marry a drinker for whatever reason her dad who is still i'm going to say my biggest supporter till his day and

i call him i call him my dad but her dad uh literally said i think this guy's different i think this guy's different let's just let's just give it a try so um you know we dated for a while then i met her parents and her dad said i absolutely love this guy just marry him she's like i don't care what you do you need to marry this guy i don't know what happened but that's what he said So I got her dad's blessing. Very, very lucky to get that. And then, yeah, so, you know, and then she migrated to Chicago. So she was living in Houston with all her family there, and she came back to Chicago with me.

And there started our five-year journey in Chicago. That five-year journey, in the first year, she noticed a few things that was tell signs, but she said, you drink quicker than your friends. you drink more than your friends. And the other thing she noticed was that you black out. You go overboard when you drink sometimes. Not all the time, but sometimes. As a mind of someone that doesn't want to admit they have a problem, I said, I'm not the problem.

You're the problem. So as we go through this back and forth for one year where I'm not the problem, you're the problem. Obviously, the drinking keeps escalating. Right? The drinking keeps escalating. In the back of my mind, I don't know why. I felt that, you know what, as people get older, they control this thing.

So I'll be able to control it when I get older, right? I mean, I'll be able to control it. I'm 30 years old right now. When I become 35 or 40, I'll be able to control it. And this will just be a blimp on the radar. Yeah. 30, 31, 32. We're married.

We're doing the traveling a lot, Brad. We're going out. There are many nights of blackout drinking. There's many nights. of where I make a fool out of myself and embarrass us. But for whatever reason, I felt that the end was going to be near then. And I felt the end was going to be near. I'm like, you know what?

We'll have kids and this will all stop. Because when you have kids, you stop, right? So at 33, we had our first daughter. We had our first child. And I say this in a very funny way, but my wife, I say my wife and I, but my wife was pregnant for three years. And here's why I say that. I'm not going to fast forward to the story.

you get pregnant, nine months, you have your daughter. Then six months into, as she's feeding my daughter, breastfeeding, we get the surprise of a second daughter. So now you have nine months of pregnancy and then another nine months of feeding. So I tell everybody, my wife was pregnant for three years. Thank you, Steve. Thank you to yours, truly. So that happened.

But in that time, a lot of changes happened. So at 33, we have our first daughter. and I felt that things would just calm down from a drinking perspective. You know, my career is going really well. And I'm like, things will just calm down. Like, it will have to. It did for a few months. Like, I just became a normal drinker.

But then she always said this, that you go good for two or three months and then you completely fuck up and you go on a bender. And I'm like, well, I'm like, I don't know what it is or something there. And I just felt, you know, I'll figure it out. I'm good for two or three months, and that should mean something. So it was like a reward system, right? I've been good for two or three months. I should have the right to go out there and get shit-faced.

During those two or three months, I want to make very clear. I was not dry. I was still drinking three times, two times, three times, four times a week. Not getting drunk, but I was having a drink. I was having a glass of wine or two. And trust me, my glasses of wines were not what the CDC or whatever health board tells you. They were not nine ounces, right? They were the Shaz portions.

Yeah. Fishbowl. Fish bowl. Yeah. Yeah. One second there, Shaz. Going back to the thing, you share sort of a common theme there up until this point to a blacking out. I mean, what's the process like that or was the process like that to kind of normalize it?

Because I think if you look at somebody who like maybe quote unquote doesn't have a problem or is a normal drink or whatever, however we want to shape that up, they're probably. not experiencing blacking out. And then it seems like when I taught with people on the show or my own personal experience at times where it's like we can black out, not remember everything, it kind of hit us, but we're very easily to kind of dismiss it or move on from it as to where I'm thinking if somebody didn't have a problem with this, like that would probably really scare them. Like how does that make sense? Like how do we normalize the whole blacking out aspect of things to say, whoa, like something's

going on here? Yeah. So the way I normalized it was I had a conversation with her. As long as she was happy with my apology, we're good to go. That's it. I had to make sure she was good with it. Did I look inside of myself? Did I have a problem, Brad? At that point, no. I just, I cared about how can I get to the next? Because I knew in the back of my mind that, okay, this party was maybe a Fourth of July blackout. And I fucked up, right? Okay, I'm going to apologize to her. And the back of my mind is like, you know what, I need to apologize and make it right. Because the next party is going to. to be Labor Day. And I have to be ready for Labor Day now, right? So I normalize it to make sure my partner was happy with me and content. And then I can move on to the next experience. And also that apology was with a nice little, hey, I'll go dry for seven days. I'll be good for seven or ten days. I don't need to drink. Just in the back of my mind, I knew what I knew what the motive was. That's the best way to put it. I knew what my motive was. Versus, yes, someone, someone that does blackout, I would agree.

They should have that instinct of, hey, I think I might have a problem here. The other thing you said too really stood out is, of course, when you get older, right, to kind of pause on that. I mean, I think that's where a lot of people draw the line in the sand, right? If I get that job, if I, maybe it's a relationship that they get into, they're like, you know, if the other person doesn't want me drinking, of course I'm going to stop. Or the big one, right? Kids or all these opportunities, which is always interesting to me to hear the stories on the podcast, that it rarely ever seems to be something external that gets us to the spot where we want to quit.

You know, it's very easy, I think, to negotiate with ourselves of, you know, like I'll keep it together for a bit, or it's not as bad as it once was, or, you know, all these different things that we tell ourselves. So that is kind of another interesting type thing that can maybe keep stringing us along, maybe for longer than it needs to, is like, hey, if X happens, then I'll do Y. Well, the examples I had at that point in my life, my brother had three kids. My brother is a true definition of a normie. He is a normal drinker. So I looked at him and I'm like, we have the same bloodline.

I'm going to have kids. He has three kids. He can handle it. He's a normie. Why can't that happen to me? Right? It's going to happen. The light bulb will go off.

Not under, and even the people around me, Brad, they were not drinkers like I was. So when I am the person that's going overboard and I see everyone else around me being normies, quote unquote, I feel that the change has to happen eventually, right? I don't need to do it. It'll just naturally happen. Yeah. Yeah, because that's the example. Yeah. So I believe we were at the point of where the babies were coming.

The baby came. Sorry, the baby came. The oldest one came. after the oldest one came, really I then started to deal with the stressors of becoming a father, a husband, and a provider in a way of where I really, really went to alcohol. The stresses of sleep being sleep deprived, the stresses of life, the stresses of your wife going through the emotional changes she's going through, right, with the pregnancies and everything. the stress of trying to provide for your family as well.

I had no outlet to speak to anyone regarding what was on my mind because two things, number one, when you are around people that you grow up with and you try to stress to them or let's just say vent to them, the issues in life, I'll just say that. There is a 1,000% judgment zone that is created. And the reason why that's there is because they've grown up with you. So if I was going to tell one of my friends that, man, I'm really stressed about, this kid dilemma or this dilemma, that entail would be someone that's listening, but listening not with a non-judgmental mind or a mind of a like-minded person.

They're judging it from the perspective of, okay, I think there's something weird. And they may go back and tell their wives or something that, man, I think something's wrong with Shaz or fucked up or something, right? So that's not what I needed. So what I did then is I just held back. I held back from the community and the folks I had. And I said, I'll keep providing. I'll keep buying the nice things to make sure everything on the outside looks nice.

But the inside, I knew mentally that I was killing myself. Like, this is not right. But I kept thinking that, wait, my brother's a normie, my friends are normies, it's going to hit. So we are now at that stage of where my daughter is one year old and we get hit with the news that we are having a second baby along the way. Once we had that news, I saw the writing on the wall that the way our life was and how complex and hectic it was, there's no way that we can do this without help. And all of our help I knew was in Texas. So at that point in time, I had a conversation with her and we agreed that we are not going to get the support we need in Chicago and we agreed to move to Texas. And that is where the end of my Chicago drinking career ended.

My Hall of Fame drinking career then. But my Hall of Fame drinking career in Texas was just starting. So that Hall of Fame career started. We moved from Texas. We moved to the lovely city of Austin. Right away, if you know anything about Austin, it is a drinking town. That's probably the first thing anyone will tell you about Austin, that lots of drinking.

It is the home of Tito's vodka. So obviously, we come to Austin. We get there. I accepted a job with another organization. We move our family there and we have our second daughter there in Austin, Texas. That time, moving from a different state of 35 years of life, going to Austin, getting a rental property and then also building our house there in Austin as well, a lot of shifting. We moved three times in two years in Austin. That's because the kids and everything.

And that just, it was lots of drinking. Now, was it every day? I don't know the statistics, but I'm going to say when I drink bread, I drink for definitely a buzz, or definitely for something else in a buzz to make sure I forget about the stresses of life. And that happened pretty much all the way until 2020. So if anyone remembers, in 2020, there's this thing called the pandemic that hit. I'm going to back, I'm going to just backtrack for a second. December 31st, 2019, our house was built in Austin.

So when we built our house in Austin, it was a very proud moment. And then 90 days after that, the pandemic hit. So if anyone knows about a house in anywhere you go, you have to put a down payment down. And that down payment's a big chunk of money. So we put a big chunk of money down on this new house. And we were loving it. And literally, when the pandemic hit, I was furloughed from my job. So when I was furloughed, because we all know about that time, we didn't know what was going to happen in the world.

and the pandemic was just nuts. So when I was furloughed, this is today what I think, but the day I was furloughed from my organization, I hung up the phone, and I believe that is when I made a deal with God because of the fact that I put so much money into this house and this lifestyle in Austin, I made a deal with God that God, you're really, really stressing me.

I need you to give me everything I need financially and materialistically for my family and my kids, and I'll do whatever you want me, to do. And the very next day in the morning, I picked up the phone and the very first phone call I made for the first startup I had was the same first phone call I made when I decided to get sober. And it's actually a mutual friend of ours. His name is Keith. So Keith is the very first phone call I made. And after that, I'll just, you know, just will keep it simple. The rest is history when it comes to materialistic and financial success. After that occurred, all the materialistic and financial

success, God gave me. But he gave me that with a caveat. I'm going to give you this thing that your dad couldn't figure out, that maybe you can't figure out, but I'm going to give this to you. I should rewind for a second about my father. Let me just take that back because I know I went ahead. My father was a functioning alcoholic for his entire life. He provided for his family. But when my father passed away. He was a functioning alcoholic, but he tried his best, right? He did the best he could he provided. I think he raised a pretty good bunch of set of kids, a wife that lives, you know, a mother that lives right next to me. So he did the best he could, but he never figured out his thing. I'm just going to be real with you. He didn't figure out his thing. And my mom and him also had

struggles with alcohol. My mom was trying to tell him to quit, and he didn't. So fast forward to now, I'm in Austin. I get all the materialistic success I wanted. But God says, I'm going to give you the thing I gave to your dad and he couldn't figure out. So now I have this thing, which I don't know I have a thing, right? Now my drinking bread is every day. If you remember the pandemic, I believe that just drink every day started because you didn't go anywhere. Remember, you're stuck at home. Just drink. What are you going to do tomorrow? We'll be stuck with the kids. Drink. What are you doing the day after? You start with the kids. Drink. All right. Well, the liquor stores were thriving, I'm sure, during this time, right? Yeah, yeah. So that's all I did. It was, I'm going to say it was an

everyday habit. Drink to get drunk. I'm not sure, but definitely drink to get a buzz, because I want to forget about how bored life is, right? That's what the pandemic gave to me. Now, during this time, there's many, many events that we go through. And as the world started getting back to normal, my drinking did not get back to normal. So it's, what is it? The cat is out of the bag, right? That's what they call it. That's what happened. So you gave me all of the freedom to drink every day and no fault of my wife. Our entire neighborhood is having block parties of drinking. So it was a normal thing. I actually give her more credit that she didn't start drinking during this time. And she was, yeah, and so our neighborhood, so everything was normal then.

But still, this point, my wife tells me at this point during the pandemic, she's like, why do you drink more than everybody? She always keeps asking that question. Why are you drinking more than everybody. Why are you the one that's on like your third or fourth drink and someone else is on their first drink? So now there's a judgment area of how I'm drinking. So what happens then? I do one in turn with any sophisticated drinker would do. I start drinking quicker and more sneaky, right? So I'm going to do some sneaky drinks. So she thinks I'm only on my first drink, but I might be on my third drink. Oh, my cup of Jack and Coke might have, I know we have this on video, my cup of Jack and Coke might have this much Jack with this much Coke versus a

normal one. But hey, it's still Jack and Coke, right? It's my first drink. It's still Jack and Coke. So mathematically, one equals one. Right? So that is where that went. So drinking escalated, normalized drinking escalated, and blackouts and just issues with my wife and I from just heated discussions and everything occurred. At this point in time, I know that I need this to cope with life. I need this friend of mine, alcohol, to cope with life, right? I am not thinking about I'm putting my kids through, you know, whatever system they have for knowledge or education. It's like a daycare or whatever, right? I have my wife who she's working part-time. I'm providing for the family, right? I'm paying the bills. I'm doing all of this. The startup's doing very, very well,

and all this, right? And I'm like, why should I cut down? Technically, if you look at it, since the startup has started and my drinking has escalated, both have gotten great. So if I quit drinking, maybe, oh my God, I might lose everything I got financially and materialistically. I need that. So I convince myself that no, I need to keep drinking because that's how I become more personable to people. So now the drinking's every day and all that. The issues start escalating and my wife and I sit in bed one day and she says, I cannot do this anymore with your drinking. And I knew the ultimatum was going to come, but before she even gave me the ultimatum, I said, you know what? I think we need to move to Houston. And she's like, okay,

how did that come up? I'm like, I just think there's a reason why I said that to her. And she knows it today, but I'll tell, you know, I'll say it now anyway. The reason why I, I told her, let's just move back next to your parents in Houston is because I truly believed in my mind that my wife would not let me drink the way I wanted to drink. So if we moved to Houston and we end up separating, I know she'll have the support of her family and they can raise the kids and I can go along my way of drinking. That's literally what my mindset was. I can live life the way I wanted to live and she can live life the way she wants to live. I'll just probably get like a place nearby so I can visit the kids and just be a normal dude, right?

Don't need to be a present father. I got her family for that. That's exactly what I'll do. This was literally my mindset as we moved to Houston. We moved to Houston about three years ago. So now we're at the stages of the fun stage ended in Chicago. The fun with problems ended in Austin. And the problems were definitely getting more towards it.

We come to Houston and this is where the problem stage occurs. So we come to Houston. Houston and we purposely built this house that I'm sitting in right now. We built this house because her entire family is on the same street that I live on. And I'm just going to say this out loud. I purposely built this house and I got this land because I knew that this marriage was not going to work out. And I felt that I need to go back to my drinking ways because that's the only way I'm going to be financially successful. The only way this guy's going to be financially successful is he can do what he does to make sure his starups are doing great and all that's fine.

I can support the kids. You know what? There is no if ands or butts about it. So we moved here to Houston. We lived down the street from her parents. Now the problems drinking starts is where all of my drinking is happening with a solo person, me, myself, and I. So all of my drinking now is happening when I'm in the car, when I want, if me and my

wife get into an argument. I can sneak out to the garage and go have a drink. I always point this way. I can sneak out there. I can have my drink there, right? Drinking, I can say white claws. Having my white claws at any point in time because that one doesn't smell as much as beer. So now it's pretty much sneaking all day, every day to keep drinking, right?

Just to make sure that I don't need to put up with this conversation and cope with life. I'm raising kids. I'm providing for my family. You should be happy. I should be happy. We're both not happy. So at this point in time, we're both not happy. And I get a phone call from my mom.

My mom's still in Chicago, by the way, at that point. And she calls me and says, hey, I want to move down by you. And I get the task of shifting my mom after 50 years in Chicago to shift her next to me in Houston. So we go, my mom comes to visit me here. and this is the weekend of Thanksgiving. This is the weekend of Thanksgiving, 2024. We go around, we go to see some houses.

My mother is very much stuck in her ways. Oh, just a note to the viewership. My mother does not drink. We go along to see houses, and every single house we go to, she has an issue with it. Also, every time she has an issue with the house, I stop by the gas station, I get a drink.

I go get a white claw. Cool. Let's go visit house number two. this is this. I don't like this is this. Okay, I stop by the gas station. I get another drink. Go to five houses.

I've had five drinks. So clearly, if anyone knows anything about alcohol, the more you drink, the more agitated you can also get as well. And the more you can let loose with your language. Let's just say that. As the night comes to an end, we come back to my house. My wife is there with my mom. And my mom is just venting about how she didn't like every property,

this, this and this. I, for whatever reason, just go off. And as I go off, I am told to leave the house. And as I leave the house, this is the memory that stays in my head as my rock bottom. I leave the house and I look at what my problem has done to everything around me. My kids are in the room sleeping and people are afraid the kids are going to hear me yelling. My wife is at the verge of tears and just telling me to leave the house because I made an embarrassment for my mom with her. My mom, my wife and not having a conversation in some way,

shape or form my mother's thinking my wife has enabled this drinking habit of mine, which she has not, because I'm the one sneaking it, right? I'm the one sneaking around drinking. My wife's like, what the fuck is going on? I see, like, it's a complete shit show. Let's just say that. My drinking has gotten to the point of a shit show, and I'm seeing this. So I leave the house.

The very next day, a bearded Canadian man snuck into my algorithm. I don't know if you know this guy. His name is Brad. I've seen him around. I've seen him around. Yeah. Well, I'm going to be very transparent. So prior to that, I was sober curious. I was looking at, I knew I had a problem, Brad. I'm going to make this. I knew there was a problem. I didn't know what it was. Because I think in the society we live in, was I a binge drinker? Was I a gray area drinker? Was I an alcoholic? Was it the alcoholism factor? Like, I didn't know what this is, what I knew. So I was going through this over curious thing on Instagram. That's probably how you snuck into my algorithm, right?

But what I didn't like about it was that there were certain people out there, and I'm not, I don't know names clearly, but certain people would try to promote, oh, if you are a high functioning, high income professional, I can help you with alcohol. Well, that's, it doesn't, like, I didn't seem right to me. That's something like more of a sales pitch than I want to help you. Then there was ones that people that say, I put it through hypnotism, if I can say it correctly. I'm like, that doesn't seem right.

That doesn't seem right. And I also knew that I wasn't meant for AA. I do have a story about AA in this timeline, so it's going to come up soon. I also knew I wasn't meant for rehab. I know you and I have discussed this, that I just didn't know if that would be the answer either. I just didn't know what the answer was. What I did know, though, for a fact, was when I spoke to a therapist, because I did speak to a therapist in the past. What I did not get was, okay, I'm going to tell you what I've

done, these blackout drinking, this day drinkings, you know, drinking, doing X, Y, Z. Any, any, I always say this, you know, I have drink at every single event, either drunk, hungover, or buzzed. And what I got from a therapist was, okay, well, let's try to fix that. I'm like, no, that's not what I want. What I want is someone to tell me that they've done what I've done. And I didn't know that. And that's when I'm... I sent a message to you and Brad, I'm going to say probably within the matter of 24 hours, way less than that. You as a human, not your robot, Brad as a human, responded back to me and we set up a conversation.

Now, that was November 21st and December 26th. We're going to get to that in a second. Is my day one. So I want to make it clear. There was 35 days of where there was slips, slopes, slopes. and everything you can think of in between that got me to my day one. And that was with me speaking to you, Brad. Do you remember the first time we spoke?

Dude, like it was yesterday. Well, what were you thoughts about that? Man, I have so many. Like, I mean, if I can, you know, be 100% honest, it was interesting. I mean, you're a fast talker, right? So you're kind of covering all this stuff. And I remember leaving that first time we connected. And I was thinking to myself, like, man,

I could be off, but I think that this guy's quote-unquote problem is a lot bigger than he realizes or he's willing to share about right now. But I thought it was a great first step, you know? I mean, you kind of had, you were kind of touching on sort of that, you know, secretive element of the drinking, which I think is a big red flag for how serious things become. Because before we get secretive you shared, right, you have people around you mentioning something. And for people around you to be mentioning something, there's probably, you know, something there's there. I mean, I thought it was great. I always share the story too where where you told me,

you know, I don't know word for word, but Chas was like, you know, if this just, if this doesn't work, I won't hire you again. And I was like, yeah, I mean, I wouldn't expect you to. But I think that that's what's so interesting about this whole journey is like, where do we put the bar for success? Where do we put the bar for is this working or not working? And I think your story is a perfect example of in one way or another how most people's story goes is you have one intervention or you have one conversation or you read one book it's not based completely on that you quit drinking from that point forward I think that what that did was give you kind of the opportunity to push the snowball down the hill it took some time to build up and gather steam but you also

you also were willing to do stuff you were just like I was like yeah we have this community. I think like if you want to join that, do it. I mean, I don't tell anybody what to do that that I work with. I said, hey, that's an opportunity for you. I said, here's some books. I'll send you some more books of people that I look up to and have enjoyed over the years and maybe that could give you some more information. I think those early days for you were kind of gathering intel of you have, you know, you're in that spot so many people find themselves, right? Shaz, about you're on track in so many areas of your life and the shame that you're feeling inside is eating you alive but it's hard to comprehend because things around you're going so well i mean you're

moving into this other house and you're you're earning money and your startups doing great and things are you know decent right things are good but in on the inside you're really struggling so i I mean, that's sort of like this short version of, you know, our first connection. Yeah, no, no. And the reason why I bring that up as well is that the one thing I got from our first connection is that the same thing. So after I was done speaking to you, I got a very non-judgmental approach. And the approach I got from you was more, I can't say welcome.

to like, yeah, join because you didn't force me to in any way. But you were like, yeah, if you want to, you know, do it. But, you know, just want to let you know that this is. And you gave me a little bit of snippet of your. experience, not so much, but a little bit of snippet. I'm like, this is that like-minded individual conversation, right? So then when I hung up or ended the meeting with you, I texted the first person to text was the same guy I texted on my first startup. So I knew about Keith that Keith was someone that had a drinking issue in the past. I didn't know what to expect, but because

I got such a good vibe from what you did, Brad, and just because you were not judging, I sent Keith the text at Keith, I think I got a problem, man. And I think it's beyond just meeting a social drinker or drinking too much. And I didn't know what to expect. But when Keith responded back to me, and I remember this and Keith sent me a screenshot of the two, Keith said that congratulations, this is a huge first step. He's like, I want you to set up a time and let's have a conversation. The very next day, me and Keith got on a Zoom call, a Zoom meeting, just talk to him. And And once again, this is the day number two of two, I mean, like-minded individual I'm speaking to. So now the light is kind of starting to turn on, right?

The light bulb's not there. I'm like, wait, I felt really good when I talked to Brad. I felt really good when I talked to Keith. Right. And both of you and Brett, I don't know if I'm going to make the assumption. You and Keith both have not gone to AA. So now I'm like, wait, these guys both did not go to AA or follow his steps and this is good. That being said, I still had 35 days before I had slips, right?

So I didn't buy into it. I still thought that, okay, I feel good. Maybe I can now moderate the drinking. I can now moderate the drinking because I'm getting what's inside of me out. So now that that's out, I can go ahead and take in alcohol again because I'm moderating. Right? Yeah. No.

That is not true because what essentially I was learning in those 35 days is as I was joining your meetings, Brad. I was joining your community. I was talking to other folks that had similar problems. I wasn't enjoying drinking. And slowly over the next 35 days, I did not realize it, but there was a funeral that was occurring of my old me. Every time I joined your community, I looked at your board. I saw people thriving in sobriety. And I'm like, man, these people are so fucking happy. Like, this has to be fake. I think I even told you that the first time. I saw I'm like, why are these fucking sober people so happy? Like, these people have to stop, like, just smiling and be happy.

Like, just be mad about life. And I was like, okay. And slowly but surely, in those 35 days, Christmas came. And Christmas, my brother, he brought over a nice bottle of wine, which was around, I think it was like about $100. And him and I enjoyed drinking this one specific bottle of wine. But during this time, Bright, I was joining your community. I was looking, I was feeling everyone's vibes.

And we had that bottle of wine. I had a glass. And this was like around midnight, like 11 p.m. actually. I had it and I drank it. And I took my last sip. I'm like, I don't think I like this anymore. I just don't know why. And I didn't know it then.

I fell asleep that night. And December 26th, 2024 was my day one. And I just woke up saying that, all right, God. And I remember sleeping. And I said, all right, God. you gave me everything materialistically financially take it away i don't want any of this anymore give me back one percent of just what happiness is because every day since that day i made a deal with you for materialistic success during the pandemic i've had zero days of happiness

so take it all away and god said that night all right good deal let's see how this goes this is where I truly believe that day one started of where if you want a person to change, the person needs to want it. I wanted happiness so bad. I did not care about anything when it came to material. And maybe that's the light bulb, right? It was like, I need to stop thinking about what you show to society and internally just understand what that happiness meant. My first month I did, the only people knew that I was going through my first two months until day 60 was just our community. I joined the Sovere Motivation community.

I said, I'm going to try this because I need to try anything because I was just desperate to understand happiness. I joined the Sober Motivation community and within the first day, I just heard my story from everybody, from the Christines of the world, to the Melissas to, of course, someone who is my brother from another mother, Gary. Gary is 18 days of head of me in sobriety. Gary is, he's someone that I'm just, he's, he is my brother. I tell us everybody, and Christine's my sister, Melissa's my sister, you're my brother,

Josh, there's so many people I can't say anything, but these are people I didn't know. And day one, I raised my hand. I think you asked me to introduce myself. I introduced myself. And there was no judgment. And then I just hear people saying their stories on what they used to do. do on a weekend and where they are. And I'm like, I want that, man. And every day I showed up at 8 a.m. in the morning, central time. And I showed up at 7 p.m. I made it like just a ritual. Like,

I want what they have. And the only thing I know they're doing is that they're just showing up. That's all I know. I don't know what else they're doing in their life. But whatever they're doing, if they have a bad day, they talk about it. They have a good day. They talk about it. They turn on the camera and they talk by that's all I know. And every time I spoke, that happiness percentage went up. all right, cool. So at the end of December, 2004, my second startup had its worst financial year. And I knew why it was because I was not present. So in January, the first obstacle came is around January 7th. I had a meeting with a client. And all of my meetings I have had to this point, I've come buzzed because I need to loosen up, right? I need to loosen up. That's how I was.

This was my first ever stand-up meeting with a pretty large audience. And after that phone call was done, the client called me and said, you just don't seem like you're there. And this is the first obstacle I came to sober. And the first feedback I get after I think I was like 12 days sober is you don't seem like you're all there. So I hung up the phone, I'm like, what the fuck is going on here? I'm like, this is supposed to better me. And the only thing I could do, the only thing I could do is sit on my hands and wait until

7 p.m. to tell the group this. And something happened is when I told the group what happened, I felt better. And I said, okay, things are going to be okay. Things are going to be all right. I don't know what the hell that means, but I just knew that. During the end of my first month, I picked up my first book, which was Disney. I picked up that book and it went and it changed my life when it gave me the rewiring format. So now I'm understanding the mental aspects of drinking.

Okay, cool. I'm coming to the meetings. I'm doing the quitlet, right? I'm doing what we're supposed to do. So now we go to month number two. And in month number two, I go to my second book. I also plan a trip to go to Disney World. And if anyone knows about Disney World, Disney World is not the happiest place on Earth.

I want to make it very clear. For kids, whatever, for parents, it's not the happiest place on Earth. So we get on a plane to go to Disney. But before we get on a plane to go to Disney, I open a book called We Are the Luckiest. So we get on a plane to go to Disney and I open up a book called We Are the Luckiest. When I open up the book of We Are the Luckiest, this is where the universe is saying something. In the book, we are the luckiest, the very first sentence of the book is a date of where the author wakes up blacked out drunk in hotel room. That date is my birthday.

So when I saw that, I'm like, okay, this is crazy. This is weird. The very first sentence, that date, if you want to know, is my birthday. I'm like, this is weird. So that, I picked up the book. I started reading it as we boarded the flight. When we came back from Disney, four days later, I was complete with the book because I read the entire book. So now, two things have happened.

I have the scientific aspect to drinking with this naked mind. I have a woman's perspective from We Are the Luckiest. Okay? I don't think I want to drink again, but maybe. And I'm still drawing the meetings. So the third month, we go to Chicago, and this is where my Hall of Fame dream career started. We get on there and you recommend a book from a man's perspective. And it's my friend, Todd McKinney, your friend, Todd McKinney, of the book, I didn't believe it either.

So I pick up the book and I open it. His relationship to his Iowa-Iwa-Hawkeyes is my relationship to my beloved Chicago Bears. It's literally like, I mean, I know I didn't go to Iowa on college. But there's a parallel there. It's a very, yeah, it's a very similar parallel. So that now changed my life. I go to Chicago. We have a great time.

We went to Chicago because my mom was moving back with us to Texas. She moves down the street. She lives down the street. And after I read his book, we went to a party where most people were drinking. I saw the faces of a hangover the day after. We landed back in Chicago. I know in my mind that my drinking career was getting close to. Like, I don't think I want to drink again.

Okay? Also, at three months, at two to three months, my wife, me and the kids, we started celebrating. Hey, Daddy got to two months. Hey, Daddy got to three months. So I'm like, this feels cool. Like, they're outside writing on chalk. Three months, what does it mean, Daddy?

And they still don't know what sober means. But I'm like, yeah, three months. Just write three months. Yeah, I'm like, just write here, right? Get your friends together, write it out there. And they loved it. I'm like, man, this is cool. And then they start saying, well,

But, Daddy, when do we do four months? I'm like, oh, shit, now I've been committed to this. I'm like, gosh. Like, well, I'm like, you know, I'm like, we'll do it on. But I still wasn't confident. I'm like, you know, we'll do it like maybe around the end of the month. On the fourth month, there was a share that changed my life. So there is the shame aspect of drinking, like you said, Brad.

The shame aspect comes in. And there was a certain moment in my mind of where there was money, a piggy bank, and alcohol involved. And that shameful moment, I could not get out of my head or my system, the thought. Literally that week, Ryan, he is someone that has been on your podcast. He shared my exact event that he recollected as well in his life. And what shocked me was not the fact that I'm like, Ryan, how do you know what I did? Because you don't even know me.

other people started putting comments in the chats of similar things they've done. So now I'm like, wait, I'm not broken. I'm not broken. Yeah, I may be special or unique, but I'm not broken. And that, I will tell you, Brad, after that share, I opened up to your community more than ever before. There was a certain wall prior to that. But now it just went away. because I'm like, if I'm going to conquer this thing called happiness and sobriety,

I need to let those guards down, open up the camera, and just share. And that's what happened after that. And that was the miracle, I think, on the fourth month. In the fifth month, it was another challenge that came by way. That challenge that came my way is I joined a basketball league with a bunch of friends of mine. The very first game, my kids saw me play, Daddy lost by 20 points. I was not very happy. I was like, I've done five months of sobriety to get to this point.

My kids, my daughters are in the basketball, and daddy gets his ass to embarrass lost by 20 points. I told my wife to take the kids home. And I got in my car, and I drove my car. And the one route in my drinking days, there was a specific gas station I used to go to to buy my white claws. That was a multiple days thing. And all of us that have gone through drinking had that certain liquor store, certain bar, certain gas station we always pass by. I went by this gas station and I was really upset. And on the way to that gas station, I was talking to God saying, why did you do this?

You did not have to do this to me. You know, we can do the financial issues, you know, whatever you want. You can throw some stuff at me that way. But why did you have to do this way? This hurt me because in front of my kids, I got embarrassed. So I went to the gas station. I parked my car. I went inside the gas station and I saw those two options.

There was a beer cooler and there was a beer cooler. and there was a coffee machine. I walked straight in, I got the cup of coffee, went to the register, got in the car. The reason why that occurred is because if I went to the cooler and grabbed that white claw and I went to the counter,

I went to the car and I drank it, the very next morning at 8 a.m., I would have to show my face to the people that have supported me and tell them that I couldn't handle a basketball loss for a game that's not even meaningful, but I couldn't handle that and that's why I had to drink.

If that truly happened, I don't believe the work I put in was right. I got the cup of coffee. I came back in the car and guess what? The very next morning I did show up and I told them what happened. And I got nothing but support, nothing but love. I'm going to fast forward to the end of the story. Five weeks later, we saw, we got in the playoffs. We see the same team in the second round, the round of the final four.

We see that same team, their undefeated team, that beat us by 20 points. I went to the corner and I told God again, I'm like, listen, you know what happened the first time. I'm going to show up. That's why I said, I'm going to show up. Like I've been doing it. Let's just see what happens. That day, that team that was undefeated went home with their first loss and we went on to the finals and got second place in the tournament. So on the way back from this tournament, I said, all right, God, this is cool.

I get it now. I think I get it. And I will tell you, after that day, I. I knew in the back of my mind, I was never going to touch alcohol again. Because that happiness, and my kids saw it too. The kids saw the victory. They were so happy. Like, that's happiness, man.

Yeah, and that's what I have in the month five. As we get over it a little bit more is I had a buddy of mine, a business partner mine. This is where a little bit more of the AA aspect comes in. I had a buddy of mine. Every time I met him, he would never drink. The first time he drank with me was in my sixth month. I met him at a restaurant and I said, I'll take a high name. And this business partner in mine said, oh, I'll take a Heineken zero as well.

And I said, wait, you're doing Heineken zero? He never told me this. He pulls out his AA coin. He's at 15 years of sobriety at the AA. Often. Um, yeah, it was like, wait, what? So it was, once again, just the, he pulls out the coin and we just have a conversation about life.

Business has never been better, but him being a partner, I understand why he was so calm during the storm of December when it was our worst year. He was so calm and I wasn't. And now it's off to the moon. He's still in Austin. He's a great guy. He is a great guy. Month number six, and the one thing I said about sobriety, I think I didn't bring this up

in this meeting, but Brad, you know about this, is that I wanted to do everything I would do in a normal drinking year. I want to do it sober. And I really wanted to come back to see, is anything I do in life better when they drink? So month number six, no different. Hey, let's go to Mexico where many, many events and many all-inclusive mistakes have occurred. We went to Mexico. We conquered that.

I just had a bunch of Heineken zeros. I had the best time of my life ever. I could not say there was anything that alcohol would help there. Month number seven is where I used the community in a different way. It was a family member's birthday. It was at my house. It was very stressful. And I couldn't vent to my family about this member because it's a job.

judgment there. As I said earlier in ours, there's going to be a judgment if you've been to someone. What I did simply picked up the phone and I called Christine from our community. I sent her a text saying, hey, listen, I'm really stressed. This is what's happening. I just don't know how to handle it. Within a matter of literally five minutes, I get voice message over a voice message from her, just showing her love and support. I keep saying this to myself. It's like, these people don't know me, but no, they do know me. They never met me. But these people are the ones that are showing up every morning at 8 a.m. and 7 p.m. listening to me just talk about life. So now this is where it transitions from this is about just don't drink today, right?

That's still the goal. Just don't drink today. But now it's about life and how you cope with life on life's terms. And when you have people like the Christines, the Gereys, the Melissa's, the Joshes of the world, and this goes on, I have a toolbox unlike any other. Because I have them. And you as well, Brad, right? I've talked to you about this. Yeah. And that's, And month number eight, I go to take coaching on as a lesson. The first person I text is Christine. Her husband's a basketball coach. He sends me paragraphs over paragraphs or how to coach my girls.

And we end up being third place as my first ever coaching experience. Month number 10 is once again, where the spiritual reading happened. Month number 10, so the same business partner that I met in month six that said he had 15 years of AA. He sent me the big book for me to read. And he said, I don't want you to go. I just want you to read it. He's like, you're on this really big reading thing.

read the big book. So I read the big book and after I was done reading the big book, I reached out in our community. I said, I would really like to speak to a group of AA folks just because it might not be the best for people from my ethnic background. Christine was nice enough to send me AA's email address. I emailed AA with my two cents and my thoughts and they said, hey, we think that it would be great for you to virtually speak at a AA meeting for a group of people in Pakistan. I accepted the invite and on month 10, I was a virtual speaker for a group of folks in Pakistan and I told them about where my dad came from, what I know. And what shocked me at the end of that was how my story is just similar to their story. Alcohol has no boundaries.

It does not matter where you're from, where you are. The addiction is real and it is there. And that's where Brad, you asked earlier, is it relevant like in Pakistan? I did not know until that. It is very well relevant in life. So yeah, that was that one. And then obviously, month 10, month 11, and month 12 were just kind of like my wrap-ups to get to that one year. And yeah, you saw how emotional I was when I got to that one year. But today I can honestly say I found happiness, but what I found is a family.

Because of this community, the sober motivation community, what they have. what you guys have given me in peace, there's not a monetary amount that can ever match up to that, man. I love you for that, buddy. Yeah, dude, same. I mean, I have a million different questions that I could ask you. I mean, your whole life, what I take away, obviously, is a speck of sand on a big, vast, you know, never-ending beach, right? So I don't know everything, and we have connected a lot, you know, over this year. But to me, my big takeaways, too, is you're, initial goal of what you mentioned there was happiness and not necessarily sobriety, but I think that, you know, whether you knew on the surface or somewhere inside that to get to that happiness and joy of

life, that alcohol was not going to be able to be part of the equation. And I see too as somebody who kept it all in, fear of judgment of what others might think. And I don't know, man, just to see you, see how you've grown. Like, I got to be honest with you. I never, thought you would be one to be interested to share a story. Like when we started having that conversation, I was like, dude, like this was, when we first met, I was like, I think this will work for this guy. Like, I think he's smart enough that he'll bring the right people into his life, but I think it will be a small secretive circle. I don't think that he'll go beyond that because of maybe the potentials of a fallout one way or another.

So that has blown me away, man. No, and you're 1,000% right. And I think the reason why that changed was number one, that business partner experience of where he pulled out his A-A coin. And another way I didn't bring up was that month, nine, month 10, at 2 a.m. in the morning, I'd landed from a business meeting from Portland. And I was picked up in a Uber car. in the Uber car I was picked up and I was tired with this gentleman who was the driver just wanted to talk I'm like that's fine man I'll just talk right it's an hour drive back I was trying not to be rude I was just trying not to be rude because I have a different perspective if it was past me I would just been very rude to put my AirPods on I you know maybe he wanted to share he wanted to listen it was 2 am the morning from I listen I talked to him and he this is where it all changed to and I didn't say the story I don't think I've ever even said this group

he said that there's something, there's a good vibe about you, man. He's like, can I just ask you what you do? And I didn't really sell him like, yeah, I was like, oh, he's like, yeah, man, he's like, give him a really good vibe and sharing. I was like, yeah, and I did tell him then. He came into, yeah, man, I made a pretty big life change. I see life differently. He's like, oh, was it health related?

Like, kind of. He's like, oh, if you don't mind me asking, what was it? I'm like, oh, I decided to get sober. And he said, oh, I'm an, I'm an A member for seven years now. And he pulled out his coin. And I'm like, all right, this is crazy. 2 a.m. in the morning, you're picking me up an Uber and you pull out an 8.8. I'm like, what the hell's going on here?

So then as we get closer to my house, he says to me, he says, hey, would it be all right if we prayed? I'm like, okay, this also goes into another aspect. I'm like, all right, and he started praying. And I thought it was amazing. I also realized at that point that I have two different parallels in my life as well. I have a religion parallel, which I have a community, which is a great community. But then my spiritual parallel is different, and it's okay. Page number 289 of the big book tells you that.

I don't need to get into it, but if anyone's interested, read page 289, you'll see the religious and spiritual paths are different and why. But that is what also made the light bulb go off. So whatever your journey is, his journey that day was to be my Uber driver at 2 a.m. And gosh, was that amazing. And obviously the rest is history. So that's what really kind of got me into this as well, Brad. From the AA talk I did for that group in Pakistan to this was like,

these people are coming into my life and telling me this for a reason, I believe. And that's where it kind of got me. Yeah. And now, you know, it's flipped over to you to share with other people. And maybe just draw back on too when you were struggling and felt like you had nowhere to share it without potentially feeling like judged or this was something morally. wrong with you or you mentioned earlier sort of brokenness. Like maybe I'm broken and I think that's like I think that's literally like the biggest

message I hope people take away from, you know, the podcast in general is just like, hey, it's just everyday folks out there. You know, we got wrapped up in this thing, but there's a beautiful life on the other side of it. If we come together and we let other people in, you know, that seems like to be a big part when the doors kind of blew off the hinges for you is when you really, is when you really opened up at a level that maybe you never had your entire life. Oh, I will tell you this right now, that many times my wife and even my brother would say, why don't you go talk to this person, like a family member, why don't you go talk to this person,

just vent to them. The issue of that is when you vent to someone that has a history or knows you, in my opinion, it's not the same as a like-minded individual. And what I got in the sober community in the sober motivation community, but really the entire sober community was like-minded individuals that think like me. I'm not broken. I am special. I am unique. Trust me, we do not think the same as normal people. I know that today, right? But everyone has a thing. I make it very clear. Just because we cannot be the normies of drinkers, do not think that you are broken because I want to promise you that there's someone else out there that has a thing that they are trying to conquer or they don't know how to conquer. I did not know I had a thing until, what is it, like December 26,

2004 when I woke up. And then I realized that I need to conquer this thing. The light bulb goes off. Everyone's dealing with their own thing and how they go about it is their own way. I know the only way today that this thing that I can conquer now is if I keep showing up to the community because the people are like-minded individuals. Yeah. And it's so interesting too how, I mean, you jumped in fairly quick, right? How were you able to to really do that? Because I'm always curious with that too, because I'll field, you know, hundreds of messages and people say, hey, what do I do? And I'm like, I mean, come and check out the community. And then, you know, nothing. How you able to really just move on that in the moment to say, okay, like, I met this weird bearded guy

off Instagram and he's saying, join this community and like, this is wild. Like, why would you even do that? I didn't call you a weird, beaded guy. It's called me a bearded Canadian. I want to make that clear, right? You know, you separate both. But, okay, I will say this. The reason why that was, Brad, is I truly was at the end of my grips with as far as what can I do. And I knew, like I said, I cannot go the routes of what I was seeing with the hypnotism or the people that I only want you if you're financially successful. No, I can't do that. I need this to be a starting line of what I can eventually be. Because I also knew there's a negative to this. If this doesn't work, Brad, and the matter escalates, there might be rehab involved. There might be AA, right, it could escalate itself. So I knew I had to conquer and I knew therapist wasn't going to be the way. I knew these options I just told you about weren't going to be the way. So when I joined, I said, all right, I'm going to put my words out there first. Before I shared, I put my words out there in the app first, right? I did that. I felt better. Then I started sharing more. It was a gradual share more, right? I think the first time I introduced myself, yeah, hi, I'm Shaz, and I try to start with an alcohol thing. And I just like

put myself on mute and I listen. But then you gradually, you'll get there. You'll get on camera. As I said, I truly believe if you're able to get on camera, share because you're just going to feel better, which I love when people share when they're on camera is I get to see the transformation of how they share, right? The shares go from like 10, 15 seconds to goes to minutes. And then you see like the physical changes in their faces. Like all of that, it makes me, I'm what, one plus year now? That's like my is when I see these faces that come on, they turn their camera on. Yeah, beautiful, man. I always take away too from a lot of the shares, you know, and connections that we've had to about, you know, your wife mentioning to, too,

you, I mean, you did say before on a nightly basis, kind of before you go to bed, like, I'm so proud of you. I mean, how important and how much of an impact has that shift made in your life and helped you stay on track? Man, I didn't want to cry. Gosh, that emotion is going to come. All right. So when you take on sobriety, you're taking it on from a selfish perspective.

I want to make it very clear. To become sober, to get to being sober. you have to be selfish. You have to put yourself first. That is the truth, because the only way a person can change is if they put themselves first. But once you accomplish or conquer or start your journey, that selfish act will be the most self-listing you've ever done in your life. Because what this has done for me, Brad, is my wife now every night. Even last night she thanked me for doing this. I'm like, Okay. And then your kids are going to be affected. My two beautiful girls are not going to see a drunk daddy in their life again. And guess what? When they go out to go see their future husband, their future partner, they're going to be like, okay, I want to get, usually, they want to have the same traits they see in a father.

And they're not going to see that. My hope is that that's what doesn't happen with them because they have not seen a drunk daddy. So yes, absolutely. Her saying thank you is absolutely. fuel, but I sometimes am like, man, this, the effect you have on everyone, my mother, my in-laws, my wife, my kids, my uncles, like everyone now does not need to worry about what Shaz will show up to a party, what Shaz will show up when we need him to. They know they'll have a clear-minded human versus the example I was providing before. Yeah, beautiful, man. So true. I mean, the way you drew that up was incredible. one thing that I'm kind of wondering, man, heading towards wrapping up, the why of all of this?

You know, why do you feel or can you put a finger on it that alcohol checked the boxes for you to maybe feel more comfortable or less stress or anything, even like in the earlier days too? Yeah, yeah. I'll say in the earlier days, it was to fit in with the crowd because a lot of my friends were drinking. Right. That was like the Y before, but then what that quickly turned into was, man, this makes me feel good when I have a problem. If I have stress, this helps me. Right. Let's be real about one thing, okay? Alcohol does what it's supposed to do. It does. If you are stressed, it will help you with the stress amount, but it's not going to solve your problems. Your problems will still be there the next day. That's a little dirty secret that I don't think people know. Actually, I know people know, but they don't want to admit it. Is, yeah, I have a nice little credit card statement in front of me and I have to pay that bill. Man, I'm stressed, time to go drink. You will feel better. But that bill is still there. That statement is still there. You still have to pay that statement. Right. So that eventually was life on life's terms was maybe it'll help me

smooth it out, right? Maybe life won't be as bumpy with alcohol. Maybe life will be a smoother road. And boy, was I wrong. That was definitely not the case. But that being said, I could tell you today that there's not a single why for me to go back to drinking. Because what sobriety has given me is I'm 100% powerless over after the first drink. I cannot control it if it was the second, third, fourth, and fifth, whatever not. But what sobriety has given me is I can say no to that first drink. And then the data tells me if I say no to the first drink 100% at time, there won't be a second drink. Yeah, which is, I mean, beautiful how that shit, how you can shift, right, for so many years kind of, you know, relying on alcohol.

I mean, I think that that's what takes place over time is that it just checks the box here. You rely on it there and you rely on it there. And that's where I see a lot of people that are in this drinking stage, right, call gray area, call it high functioning, is that you never know when that's going to flip. Like you never know when you're going to go from things being all right-ish externally to them being completely different. Shaz, what do you got for anybody who, you know, can relate to your story, which I feel there would be a lot of people. What would you mention to them, man, if they're starting out, if they're dealing with a few things, you know, as they kind of work through this and figure it out? I'll say the same thing I say to any new member that joins the community. I will always say that if you are sober curious, congratulations, that is the right first step.

You need to be sober curious. That's what I did. And when you join the community, I also want to say, congratulations, on making the greatest decision of your life. Becoming sober was without a doubt the hardest thing I ever had to do. And even my one-year sobriety date, I celebrated that harder than I celebrated any birthday of mine. Because what you are going to do is hard. I don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but I will say something. The data and the stats are against you succeeding.

They are against you because society we live in normalizes drinking, normalizes alcohol. So the data and the stats are going to be against you and it's going to be a heavy burden. But the one thing you can control is just do not drink today. That will lead to another day and just keep showing up. That is the way you will find, in my opinion, the greatest journey. and in my opinion, the greatest accomplishment of your life. Today I can tell you I found happiness, success, all that stuff is here, but there's one aspect that I need to do is I need to keep showing up.

And yeah, that's all I can tell people, Greg. Yeah. And I mean, I think that that's just a beautiful example. I mean, if we look at other areas, and I mentioned this in the meetings at times, I mean, if somebody's going to the gym and you look in the mirror and you say, oh, yeah, you know, I'm looking good now. You don't just stop going to the gym because you've reached your goal. And if you do, then you would realize, okay, it's probably not going to continue.

There's that weird thing with sobriety and alcohol-free journey for a lot of people is when they hit a certain spot. It's like, okay, let me stop doing what got me here, which is so interesting. But if you just like you do, I mean, you commit, you know, five, six hours a week to show up, to get all of these benefits that we've talked about in your life. Like, it's a beautiful thing. And you literally, I think you are somewhere in my house because that conversation happened with my wife and I last week. She literally, I was listening to a meeting on speaker. And she said to me, she's like, you got this to write a thing down.

Do you have to keep listening to these meetings? She literally asked that question. And my response to was like, are you and I going to stop going to the gym now that we're healthy? Yeah, just stop. No, you're not. And like, it's routine, discipline, structure. If you guys follow me on Instagram, you'll see what I put that down is routine discipline structure. You can make that formula anyway.

Sobriety is no different. You need to have the routine, the discipline, and the structure. If you're not able to make the meetings perfectly fine, post in the app. You'll feel better after you post. Yeah, awesome, man. Anything for closing? Any other thoughts that we missed that you wanted to share? You can label it whatever you want.

I know you some of labels. Was I a social drinker? Sure. Was I a binge drinker? Sure. Was I a great area drinker? Sure. Was it alcohol?

is in my family, sure. Was I an alcoholic? Sure. What you cannot, label it whatever you want. What I know is 100% yes is I had a thing. I had a problem with alcohol. And this is how I conquered it. Everyone goes their own route,

but handle it the way you need to, but what I always say is like-minded individuals in a community. The opposite of addiction is connection. Please listen to that. That's the one thing I also want to do this. Yeah. And I love that too. I mean, how many times do we get hung up on how to label something before we do anything about it?

I feel like we do it. Like, I think looking back at your entire story there, as you go through it, the blinders are on, right? You don't realize how destructive it is. You don't realize what exactly is going on. And I'm sure as you're going through it here now, it's like we can look back and say, come on, man, it's clear as day. Like this was not heading anywhere, you know, where we wanted to be in life. But I think that really comes down to this, like, do you believe your life would be better without alcohol?

If the answer to that is yes, then it's time to do something about it. You don't need to score high on a questionnaire on Google. You don't need to ask everybody around you to see what they think. I think we feel like our life is going to be better and we're going to live with more purpose and in connection than that's all that really matters. But people, man, they spin their tires, dude. Like, I was there. You probably were there. Like, what is this, man?

What's going on? Like, do I qualify for this? Or am I bad enough for that? I mean, look at Johnny over there. Like, he's lost at all. I mean, his wife left him. Of course, he's got a problem, but not me. And that can keep us stuck.

So good mention. Please do not ask Google or chat GPT if you have alcohol problem. Just send a message to somebody on Instagram. That's fine. Those quizzes were just, I don't want to think about those quizzes anymore. Well, the problem, the problem is we usually aren't honest with the quiz. Yeah, exactly. That's the second part.

I mean, I think if somebody is at that spot, I don't know everything, far from it. But I think if somebody is at that spot, it's something to look at, man. Because if you look at other serious addictions out there gambling and, you know, food and all the other stuff, like I've never questioned. whether I've got a problem with gambling. I'll get two scratch tickets a year. I'll take my grandmother to the casino, but I have never been like, let me Google,

you know, and sometimes Shaz, I'll go overboard. I'll say my budget's 200 and I'll spend five. But I leave it there. I don't feel shame about it. The next day, my life just goes on.

And I've never thought about like, hey, do I have a problem with this or with that? So I think if there's that sort of internal nudge, like, man, it's something to really, really look at. in the act of addiction, that nudge, let's be honest,

we kind of like just wipe it off, right? We're like, oh, no, it's going to be okay, right? So you kind of wipe it off. I would agree with you, if you are starting to have those thoughts of anything you might have. Alcohol is the reason why we're speaking today, you should probably dig a little bit deeper

and find yourself a community. I would agree. Yeah, 100%. Shaz, great to connect today, man. Thanks so much for sharing with us on the podcast. Thank you, Brad, for everything you done from you, man. I will talk to you soon. Thanks, man.

Well, there it is another incredible episode here on the podcast. Huge shout out to Shaz for jumping on here and sharing a story. I did share in the episode. I never put have ever guessed a day where him and I would be connecting on the podcast, especially reflecting back to when we first met and a couple other times after that. So incredibly proud of him. Incredible dude. Been a real treat, man, a real pleasure just to see all the evolution over the last year

a little bit over a year form. Anything in Chaz's story that you relate to? Really wondering that, drop a comment on Spotify if you're there of, if you feel there's any similarities to your journey that you've been through. And like I said, kind of in the intro, I mean, this is where I see a lot of people struggle. And I mean, the truth is, you know, how long can you carry this on for? I don't know. For some people, they might be able to carry it on for a bid.

I think it's almost kind of like, without taking it. taking risk in life, have you actually lived if you just played it safe all the way through? And I think that a lot of people, they carry on drink until the end of their time. But did they actually live, like, to go through life and experience it in a way that they weren't escaping or numbing or distracting themselves from the ups and downs of life, which are difficult at times, but maybe what make it beautiful is that everything doesn't always work out. I mean, I think that that's kind of our wish at times is that, oh my gosh, I wish everything worked out. But how kind of boring of a life would that be without some ups and downs and some challenges

along the way? This was just a great story to hear. And I think a great place to kick off in 2026. I've been a little bit sick. We had the holidays with the kids. And everybody was kind of busy. So recording podcast just wasn't, you know, front and center for everything, which was good. It was a nice break and I'm excited to get back to things.

Shaz is an incredible contributor to the sober motivation community and for anybody, you know, looking into 2026 to make changes. It doesn't have to be the sober motivation community, but make some friends out there. Like make this real for yourself. Enough of the secrets. Enough of just doing it halfway and then telling yourself it didn't work. I mean, this is it. This is the year where your whole life can turn around.

I mean, you see what a year did for Shaz. and he doesn't have an overly unique success story of this, of this working out and how many changes that come into our life. So if you make the changes, you can experience good things as well. And you deserve good things. And you deserve to show up authentically you. So thank you, as always, for listening. If you haven't left a review on Apple or Spotify, let's start off the year on the right foot. Drop some five stars and I'll see you on the next one.