Soder - 115: Babe Ruth Diet with Ryan Sickler | Soder Podcast | EP 113

Episode Date: January 6, 2026

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Hey, everybody. I want to thank you for coming and seeing me on the Golden Retriever of Comedy Tour. We've announced the second leg. It starts up in February, February 13th in Orlando, then February 14th and Tampa. Going to be in Buffalo, February 28th, Boston, March 6th, Philly, March 7th. Go to DanSoter.com. The whole second leg all the way through April is on sale, all available at DanSoter.com. I love it. do the way back pause this

pause this go watch his special come back please welcome back I always am interested with friends of mine that are sports fans

that are also that I know friends of mine that are also fans at the same team that know each other you were you know you're in New York

so you did Stavis do you guys text about the Ravens? Only not this year yeah you guys are well Lamar's out now we talk a very little bit about it

but I told him, like, there's no reason Ronnie is not calling our draft pick next year. Oh, yeah. I told him that last year. I'm like, you 100% should be doing our first round draft pick. Yeah, that should be the thing. Right. They all, a lot of the times, for non-sports fans, the NFL draft, what they've been doing recently in years is they have a celebrity fan of the team come

and do a draft pick on usually night one. Or do they still do Goodell doing the round one? celebrity does round two it's a good question i feel like this year i didn't see godell do all of them i feel like this year they usually godell does like the top 10 because that's the sweet shit he wants that he wants the strongest hit yeah so they give they give gudel greens on the on the on the on the draft and then they bring in the celebrity and stov is big enough he could be ronnie the character no doubt yeah dude i'm lobbying for dude you got to understand how big of a football fan is i told this story in an album

and on this is not happening, but I was legitimately supposed to be one of the ball boys for the 1984 Baltimore Colts. Crazy. The team that left. The team that left and became the Indianapolis Colts, that would have been how much worse of a drug problem

you would have had. If you were a ball boy for a team that left, you would have been dead. This is, you know, before eBay and all that stuff back then. And you could just go to the practice and you like the players would throw the ball with you on the side and yeah they were only also making like right 60,000 yeah and they're working to use car dealership in the offseason or pro wrestling yeah

yeah or they're in a local wrestling and um raymond butler was playing catch with me on the sideline and he said you know we're already in season but how do you feel about being a ball boy and i was like oh my god i'd love to and after that practice my dad talks to him and all and we're i'm going to be one of the ball boys for the 84 colts and then a few months later my dad wakes up in the middle of the night. He's like, you ain't go believe this. Shit, we all go downstairs crying, watching the Colts drive out of that. And it was literally the middle of the night, right? A snowstorm, too. It was all so dramatic. Did you guys really watch them drive out of town? Is that a real thing? Yeah, they were all on the news. It's all still. So they filmed them

driving out there. Here's the thing. They knew. They perp walk the Colts? They knew. They knew the whole time because Ursay at the time was a drunk. And he would get on flights. He was going to talk to Arizona and everybody. And then the media would meet him when he'd come off the flight. Seagore and I text about this shit all the time. Now hold on real quick because I need to know, even as a sports fan, I need to figure this out. I'm a little cloudy on this entire thing because I do know, all I know is that 84, I was a one years old. 41-ish. 42, yeah. I, all I heard was, oh, Baltimore left in the, the Colts left Baltimore in the middle of the night to move to Indianapolis. And you think they're using that to be,

be dramatic. I didn't think they left middle of the night. There's video everywhere. In the snowstorms too. It gets a little more dramatic. But here's my question about, because you say Ursae. Are we talking Jim Ursay who just passed away or we're talking about his father? His dad. His dad. Jim Ursey was a little kid. He's 84. He's a young kid

because Jim Erce. When you're born 84? Yeah, I was born 83. Okay, so they're leaving They're leaving like while I'm... You've only known him as the Indianapolis. That's it. Right. But Jim or say the son that just recently died was awesome he would just do drugs and party and play guitar he would like he had this band he would go around with guitars and show them off right he like bought jimmy hendricks's guitar and he's like you want to see jim he would do what i would do if i were

the son of a football owner and you and you had a super bowl under patent manning yeah you know what i mean yeah and you have johnny unites says hello to you like all these so he he had a hard road because this is the guy who was a child when his dad did this sure but it's the family business man just like the models like we're going here now and you're going and you're going for context the models owned the cleveland browns who left for baltimore so baltimore got a team back in the same way they lost the team it's that saying man you lose a man the same way you get them. If you're cheating on the side, guess what? They're going to cheat on the side. And Baltimore was like, let me get some of that pussy. And Art Modell was like, well, I didn't want,

when nobody wanted Cleveland. I thought a whole joke about it. It's like getting somebody's like, you know, used tities, like old beat up ugly tities. We want new tities. They go, oh, they're from the side. We want new tities where you can see the ripple in the bag. Yeah, not some, you're not your ex-ex wife's tities. It reminds me of the Simpsons when Homer's friends with that Bond villain and he gives him an NFL team and he goes, the Denver Broncos. And it's a, the Denver Broncos on his patio. So, back to then. So Erse, Jim Ursay's dad, who likes the sauce.

Robert Ursay, Bob Ursay. Who they still hate in Baltimore. You can go to bars and there's still fucking shit up there about fuck Erse. Really? That's. It ran deep, dude. That's, I mean, that is impressive. Have you ever seen the band that wouldn't die, the 30 for 30?

No. Okay, so there's a 30 for 30 called the band that wouldn't die. And it's the Baltimore Colts marching band. They were the only team in the NFL had this marching band at the time. Well, when the Colts moved out of town in the middle of the night, they went and stole their band uniforms and they hit them in a funeral parlor for years. And then slowly but surely, the band would still perform around the city. They would get on. Like a ghost band? They were just a Baltimore Colts marching band. And they were just like, show up. Parades. Do parades. Like, you know what I mean?

Appropriate. It was just randomly. Oh my God, here they go. It's Tuesday at 3 p.m. I swear to God, it's the Colts marching band coming outside my plays. But then the Models move Cleveland to Baltimore, which I was not a fan of either, because that is exactly what happened to us. Meanwhile, we're watching. You guys do have empathy for Cleveland. I've got empathy for Cleveland, but

then I don't because of what happened. So we go from 84 to 96 without a football team. We're a storied franchise, storied city, everything, but we watch Jacksonville get a team. We watch Carolina get a team. We watch the Rams move cities to

times. We watch Oakland go up and down. Watch the Cardinals. Cardinals too. We're watching all of this and we're like, where the fuck's our team? Yeah. And then Modell decides to move Cleveland to Baltimore. Now, what I do, I know he's hated in Cleveland. Was that 96? 96 is when we become the Ravens. But what I like about that is Modell said, look, I value this city and this storied franchise enough. I'm going to start a new team. Yep. I'm going to start new records. Your legacy will live. Jamal Lewis, is never going to beat a Jim Brown record. But the way I would see Eddie George on the Titans

beating Earl Campbell on the Hoylers, oilers because you're doing the history of it. Yeah. No, fuck that. You did they? Here's my question to that. I thought I remembered at first that they were going by Brown's records and stuff

when the team was new. They started from scratch. Because this is what's crazy. And for non-sports fans, if you're still following, what happened is they, they, once that team left Cleveland and went to ball.

Baltimore became the Ravens. Years later, the NFL gave Cleveland another team. Not years. That was the Browns again. Three fucking years. Three years later, 1999 it was. For a team that didn't do shit. Yeah.

And still hasn't. And it still had zeros in their win column multiple times. Has the top five first round. They should be a goddamn juggernaut at this point. And they just fucking suck. So you've got, and by the way, the Baltimore, Cleveland rivalry is great. Super Bowl. since we've come.

I know. One of them was over us. Let's fucking pump the brakes. Now, you, but you guys, the Baltimore Ravens are one of those organizations

where you have cool unis. You've always had cool unies, cool color scheme, purple and black fucking rules. And Baltimore is a city where you're like, you feel justification. You've got that mid-Atlantic attitude

of like we're port. We work at the docks. Everyone's drunk and fighting each other. We need a team to cheer on. And you need a team. like that. And we were a defensive-minded team was the right choice for the city of Baltimore.

Were you immediately, so this is just you, we're talking about Ryan Sickler, the fan of football in Baltimore. You understand you're getting the Browns. Are you, you're mad that it's the Browns, but what about when they tell you it's the Ravens? That's when it came in with fake tits. That's when it changes.

They came in and they go, I'm not that. Look at me. I'm sexy. They go, uh-oh, I had a summer away. Well, think about it. People also, like, are you going to still root for the Colts? And I'm like, that's like rooting for an ex-wife to hit the lotto. We're not doing that. There was a time when the 49ers got rid of Candlestick Park, there was a rumor that they might go to Los Angeles.

And I had to really have the moment where I'd go, I couldn't be a Niners fan. Santa Clara is south enough. It's tough. That's 40-minute south. But you go to L.A. You put the L.A. and the red and gold, we're done. We're done. Good luck.

God bless. That would be. Did you think about other teams, go to? This is the thing. The blessing of this if you're a sports fan is, okay, now I'm not just a Colts fan. Now I'm a football fan. So right away, I find Steve Largent and Dave Craig and I love the Seahawks. I find Ronnie Lott and Joe Montana. Shout out for the news. I find Osias. Well, we already knew him from Maryland, but Icky Wood. I got Walter Payton. Barry said, so I became a football fan. And I was fan. I wouldn't, I wasn't a diehard of anything.

I liked the Raiders for a little bit, but I really liked the Giants when they had hostile. Settler, Dave Meggit, when they won the Super Bowl. He took over for Phil Sims when he got hurt. That was a great team that year. It was all red, white and blue when they won those old giants. Great team. Those Giants, the ones that say Giants on the side? What are you doing, New York?

Go back to that. With Scadaboo and fucking Jackson Dart. Go back to the old school says giants on the side. But I'll say, I want to say this, because you're a knowledgeable football guy, for sure, sports fan. I know I'm biased, but Baltimore. is the greatest football city town. Listen to me. I'm going to back it up with stats in history.

All right. Not Green Bay. Not all these other storied franchises. Let me back it up with some stats first. And then you can decide. It's not even close. It's so easy. Are you ready?

When we first get in the league, we're the Baltimore Colts. Super Bowls aren't invented yet. Yeah. They're just championships. They weren't even letting black guys touch the ball. You guys are just doing white dudes with space man haircuts. you were going like while we run it we call it the we call it the tough tea and that's what happens when you run straight at him so we're going to run the tough team we're going to run right at them 58 we win the championship which is the super bowl then the greatest game ever played they call it the overtime with alan amici sudden death against the giants that is what catapulted is that frank gifford he was on that team he's on the giant's team yes he was shout out kathy lee that catapulted the NFL into the juggernautative

is today. That's when everybody's like, oh, this is an awesome thing. Now, we then go on to win, well, we lose Super Bowl 3 against Joe Namath and his guarantee. Yeah. We win Super Bowl 5. So we've got championships and Super Bowls and Super Bowls as the Baltimore Colts. They leave. Now, in the interim, ready for this? Yeah. We get a USFL team. Philadelphia stars moved to Baltimore. Baltimore stars. Guess what we won, the USFL championship. Hold on. Hold on. I'm going to get to the best one last. We got a semi-pro team called the Baltimore Bears Championship. Okay. Okay. We get

the Ravens. Two Super Bowls. 2000 and 2012. In between all of that, they won't give us a team. Like we said, we're watching them and go everywhere else. They give us a CFL team. What? Oh, yeah, bro. The Baltimore Stallions. I interned. And

a Canadian football league team? We're the only American team to ever win the Grey Cup in the history of the Grey Cup. The Baltimore motherfucking Stallions. Baltimore is the greatest football town in the world. Every team that has come has gone to the pinnacle. I feel like we're about to enter a hall with like a bunch of trophies and stuff. And you go, and now the proof of everything I just said.

Yeah, I, okay. We're a CFL fucking style. We want you. You guys are a football town. But here's what's crazy. How, what is Baltimore high school football like? Because I think that makes a judgment on a town more than anything. Well, because you go to Ohio

Yes. With like Pittsburgh kids or like out like the Philadelphia area where you get South New Jersey and you get Philly. But then you go to Texas outside of Dallas and you get, I mean, Texas high school football. But then Florida high school football. I mean, it's it's crazy because I think high school football to me cements what more of a football town is because it's the kids.

It's like the kids that live there are playing. I don't know because pro, I mean, you guys have the chips. a crazy stat run. That is a crazy stat run. Every level that they come in, we have won. Not just had a team. We've won the top. Yeah, football town. You guys might be that. I mean, but you're right. So I'll say this. Baltimore is a football town. No, but Maryland as a state, yes. There's a lot of good schools like the Matha. Well, you guys also go to Big Ten. It's all the money that's, so I'm from Baltimore. Sure. But Maryland's only this big. Yeah. But the money is close to D.C.

Yeah. Everybody I meet other than Stavi is from whenever they say, I'm from Maryland, I go where? It's always right outside of D.C. I'm like, you people had money. You're in the Rockville, Montgomery County. That's where the good high school players come from. Yeah, because they can get coaches that were like in college and their premier schools and everything. And then they get fat kids who are smart.

And University of Maryland, that's the key. A lot of high school teams have fat kids. No, no, no. You need smart fat kids. You're right. Who know how to pull. Right. Who know how to bug and set up a screen.

No, wait a second. You need to have fats that show patience. No, no, no, don't immediately. You've got to have dancers feet.

Yeah. And that's only rich white high schools. That's the only place you're going to get that. Because the fats in the fats in lower income neighborhoods, fat people in lower income, they need that food. They're eating because they have to eat McDonald's.

Good point. These kids are having protein shakes at the rich white high schools doing drills, learning how to walk. backwards but yeah it is do you take when you tell someone you're from Maryland and you're from Baltimore and then you meet someone and they go oh I'm from Baltimore and you do that game where you find out how far away from Baltimore they are does anyone ever apologize or is anyone ever like taking the like I guess the accountability or Don like I'm not really from Baltimore like when

you zero in on it yeah I don't know I don't really give a shit about it that much I don't like I'm always interested in how many questions do that You're not from Baltimore. You're from 15 minutes outside. You're Baltimore County right across. Yeah. That's a younger thing to do. I mean, my birth certificate has West Baltimore specifically.

So what's up? I'm born in St. Agnes Hospital directly next to, which is no longer there now, Cardinal Gibbons High School, where Babe Ruth played his ball. So where are you at now? Demolished the school. Had a statue I'm in there, demolished the school. Really? The school's gone now, yeah.

Babe Ruth is from Baltimore. Yeah. So Bay Bruce is from Baltimore. Baltimore, center field of Camden Yards. Shout out, one of the most classic ballparks in Major League Baseball. His dad used to have a pub called Bambino's Pub in that area. And there's a little thing in there for it. And I think there's a bar out behind it now called Bambino.

Why does that make me feel so good to know that family members of athletes back then were exploiting him too? I mean, doesn't it make sense why he probably was an alcoholic to his dad? Did you ever follow his diet? No. Did you see what he did? Can you bring up Babe Ruth's diet? It is, it is, it's our.

uncomfortable it doesn't sound it doesn't sound like a lot of those diets they go like can you believe you consume that and you're like yeah that's crazy if he did and then he's going out performing like that dude he's fucking a pitcher and a hitter i was saying show hey otani's the closest we got so i listen i say it all the time too go ahead this is what the internet says bay ruth was known for his legendary appetite unconventional diet here's a glimpse and his typical daily intake again this is off the internet daily always have to take this with a grain of salt. It might not be true.

Breakfast. Breakfast. Pine of whiskey mixed with ginger ale. Wait, that's how it starts. It's how it starts. A pint. For breakfast. That does me in.

I have a pint and a couple breaths of air. You think you could hit a 90 mile an hour fastball even eight hours later? Maybe. Maybe it slows that out. Makes that ball a fucking beach ball. Pinet of whiskey mixed with ginger ale for his stomach. A steak, four fried eggs, fried potatoes, and a pot of coffee to balance out that whiskey. The liquid amount alone would make me sick.

Yeah, dude. I'm good all day. The liquid amount alone. Lunch. We're at lunch. That was just breakfast. That was at 8 a.m. This was four hours later.

Two porterhouse steaks, two heads of lettuce with blue cheese dressing, and two platefuls of fried potatoes afternoon snack snack four hot dogs and four coca colas a hot dog and a coke we're not even at bat in practice

he's not even at the stadium he's on his way now he hasn't put on his weird socks yet in his fucking wool baseball uniform dinner same as lunch just to remind you that's two porterhouse steaks two heads of lettuce with blue cheese

dressing and two platefuls of fried potatoes. That's, you run that back twice. Late night snack. Four hot dogs and four Coca-Cola's. That feels AI. Other dietary habits, reportedly consumed over 10 calories, enjoyed sweets, including chocolate ice cream and apple pie,

drank large amounts of beer and whiskey, smoked cigarettes heavily. Babe Ruth ruled. All these guys now are on like, uh, different kind of like probiotics and all this stuff, If that's real, they should pay one athlete to do that and see what their fucking numbers are at the end of the season. You still think you can hit 284 in the AAL? That's great.

They should make Shohay do that. They should make Shoeh. He's only guy that could do it. They go, they go, they go, they're a show hey, 10Ks, three fucking home runs in the NLCS. You throw up on the mound. I couldn't move after that. His interpreter would be like, go, Mr. Otani say, you want him to eat the is a Babe Ruth.

Yes, we want him to live by that diet and play baseball. He says that is impossible. Dude, trying to do that and then go against, but also. I don't think I could do that on a food competition day. No, that's like man versus food shit. Four fried eggs and fried potatoes is enough for me for most of the day, let alone a steak, a pot of coffee. How much was Babe Ruth pissing?

and the cokes and the pot call and the whiskey too don't forget the pint of whiskey you're putting cigarettes on breakfast and nothing the rest of the day that sounds like his blood was like tree sat that's fucking crazy all the fucking bullshit he was only 250s no way a man that he eats like that that's like 250 plus inflation yeah there's no way dude that's like a 2025 480s dude's no like 215 15 that's good shit that's a high school kid today that's borderline that's like no 215 there's no way he weighed 215 or that's what the caloric intake of real food was this is before they made science food so it actually was beef it really was a age they go no it really is hard to gain weight now

you don't understand that all that happened I was there with a babe babe babe can I have an egg no you're hungry around the babe and you're like dude this is ridiculous the four hot dogs four coax is legitimately enough for a day for me yeah all that syrup and sugar just fill you oh god and then him just juicing shots and then you go out and fucking play ball yeah would pitch and hit hey guys it's the freezing cold winter and if you're working outside that sucks and you should layer yourself against the outdoors check out brunt workwear they're like uh You know, a really good and affordable heavy-duty clothing company for you guys that do real jobs. I'm talking about stuff outside, freezing cold, get some brunt workwear, the boots, the hoodie.

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look that man right there is not 215 pounds that's 250 pounds I was going to say 280 look at that fucking that's a big boy and also let's be real no disrespect the pitching back then was weak as fuck you're throwing like

89 but it's hanging over home plate. I imagine what, if you sent Vlad Guerrero Jr. back to the like, when he was playing? When was that? The 20s?

Vlad Gero Jr. A hundred home run. I can't believe this. This man's superhuman. Jesus Christ. What are we doing? Oh my God. I'm so nervous.

That's like that old Shane joke where he was like they were so good at baseball. They knocked that accent off us. Like Jackie Roberts is a holy shit. It's my favorite turn when Shane goes from doing that voice going holy shit you see how far he hit that yeah dude they were like that's crazy just to fucking sit there and consume that much i mean you guys had a guy that i love that i just watched a 30 for 30 about tony sarahusa yeah and he was kind of a little bit like that the goose

he was a throwback for sure eat a sandwich drink a fucking big soda and then go beat this shit out of people he had my favorite fucking line it was the year it was 2000 when we had the great defense in the history of defense people in chicago are getting real mad at you right now all they want to we get 165 points in the regular season and only one touchdown in all the postseason that touchdown was scored in the super bowl was a kick return special teams not the defense oh yeah because i mean i just watched that 30 for 30 and they go over it and it's funny watching ray lewis it was before uh goose died it's like him and goose talking and they're like man that defense that was that Marvin Lewis was your

decorinator Bill Belich Jeff Blake quit in the middle of it Billick it was How bad does it suck to be Brian Billick and you have a name close to Belichick? Well also that and remember he was the offensive guru in Minnesota with Culpeper Randy Moss

and and oh come on Ryan it's it Carter Carter Carter and Dante Culpepper and all they did was throw the ball and now he's coming to a team where he's like I can't do shit we didn't score a touchdown for we didn't score for a touchdown for three uh five games and still won like two of them off our d like that's stupid shout out trent dofer but goose he um during the a fc championship

against the raiders he uh tackled rich gannon and then they accused him of you know putting all his body weight on him popping down on that shoulder and it took gannon out of the game and then we ended up beating them they scored three points yeah and he was crying about it later and then they interviewed Goose about it and said did you hear that stuff Gannon saying about it he said you know what you don't want to know what my wife said she said what's he complaining about I'll take that wait twice a week that's great that is great that is where is that dude where is we need funny players yeah here's the problem is we don't have there are some guys that are kind of funny but those are like we need to like there's no character there's no character yeah there's no characters

yeah there seemed to be a lot more of that but that's also us getting old it is but also think the league is like watch what you say watch what you do a lot of podcasts now yes so people are like anything can ruin you now for those guys yeah but we had him and sam adams he was a throwback for sure goose and like he's a guy would drink a bunch of beer and the guy before didn't you have a radio show where you're just getting hammered in baltimore those guys used to have local radio shows before podcasts before they could get money before everybody knew a way to sell somebody money or before gambling apps were paying every athlete to start a podcast they had to do local radio and they had to be like but some guys like goose flourished that's right because they

would have a radio guy with them so they'd go like all right we're back and we're live the fucking dirty daddy's cigar, you know, the goose is here. Tom's, and then he'd be funny and then the radio guy would handle it,

telling you. Well, we had a guy like him before on the Colts too named Art Donovan. You remember Artie Donovan? No. Dude,

number 70, Art Donovan was goose before goose. He was that guy, the big dude that, and he was the greatest storyteller. Letterman would have him on all the time. Really? Yeah.

Letterman loved Art Donovan. Wait, was he a boxer? Was he in a bunch of movies? He was not a box. He's from Brooklyn originally, but he was a Baltimore Colt, Hall of Famer.

All right. I'm trying to think of the guy from Texas with a mustache that was the boyfriend. Oh, uh, yeah, yeah, Randall Tex Codb.

Yes. Yeah. No, not him. Okay. This dude. He's always had random tough guys on. And,

and already was for sure, but he was a great, like you listen to him tell us. He was just a phenomenal storytelling and letterman loved it. He could sit and listen to him all night. So I was lucky. Our varsity club senior year, we had our,

um little whatever party or something at his art donovan's country club and he came and spoke and he didn't give a shit that we were 17 or whatever he's fucking this and fuck that he's telling old stories is you know what's better than pussy boys nothing and if you're into asshole well that's just fine i'm okay i'll grow to agree with it it's guys and girls in there but he would drink a case of beer just like babe ruth a day yeah that was his thing he's one of those guys and not get fucked up i know drink a case of it a day but he was built you're not built like that he's built like you know what it is though it really is like we go their mental health was so bad they were doing this everybody was a their their sexual oppression blah blah blah and you go

they also were having three martini's at lunch and coming back and flying through that afternoon block they didn't have phones to sit and scroll they sat there smoking cigarettes going like we'll do merger. I'm pretty fucking banged up. The guys would just get drunk at lunch. But he was great. So he's a Hall of Famer and I like to get little mini helmet autographs. Yeah, those are awesome. So he would sit, you got one up there? I got a nine or one

up there. He would sit in a local bar right outside the stadium every game. So before a game one time, I went in, went to the back, saw him, he signed a helmet for him, he talked to him for a little bit and then I went over to the game. Like, those guys are gone. I'll tell you right now, dude. Those guys are gone. How great

of a life that is. If I did comedy, until I was like 60 and then I just like hung outside of comedy clubs selling ticket signing ticket stubs. People buying a drink. I go, thank you very much. Yeah, I was a real, real silly guy back then. And then if I opened like Dan's laughs and I just went like to restaurants and shook hands, you guys enjoy mistakes?

I would do the retired athlete thing. I'd open a car dealership if I was popular enough. You want to know what I want to do, Dan's. We've got to get out. People got to get out of comedy and open up restaurants. I want to be a bench coach. A baseball bench coach. For like a high school semi-pro?

No, pros, bro. Oh, yeah. I just want to sit there, eat my sunflower, rock back and forth, ask them some shit. And then be like, all right, let me get out. Yell at an umpire or something. I want to talk about a swing being too low and have a just a barrel of double bubble behind me, just with a large shot.

A lot of that way you hustle, a lot of that shit. You know what I mean? Spitting. Spitting too much where you go. There's no spit. left in his mouth. I'll manage if, like, the manager gets thrown out of the game, you know, that kind of shit. I'm like, you guys are on your own, man.

What I love, Katie loves baseball. It's sort of like your favorite sport. So we watch, like, she's got me back into it big time, like big time. We watch day baseball. I'm sad it's ending with the World Series. I'm like sad. It's ending. But I watch that and I go, fuck I would love that.

Just a giant cheek, a cha mixed with double bubble and just spit and talking to my friends going, what the fuck was that? Like if List came back to the dugout And I go, why are you fucking swinging at that? What is that shit? You're fucking better than that. That premise has got nothing on that. So what are you doing?

Or he fucking smokes one and you're like, do a high five. Yeah. Or put a fucking a crown on them or whatever. Fucking what a punchline. Yeah. Well, I would love to get a crown put on me after I come off a sex. A sword with notebooks stacked on it. Like one of those turnover swords.

You're like, fuck, dude. Sport culture. comedy it would be great it would change everything all the ones that are just fucking clout chasing you go I didn't know how you fucking do a joke yeah I don't know that so much as a kid I would take a piece of bread right I'd take like a piece of wonder bread and I put it in the microwave for like 10 seconds just to get it warm and then I was kidding that I would peel the cross out of it and I'd roll it up and that's what I would put my mouth as much you yeah because bread will stay in there all day

long. What? Stay in there all day long, man. I'm not, my dad gave me tobacco. Did you, have you ever done snuff or tobacco? You've done a dip? I mean, I dipped. I dipped when I was in high school when I played football.

I do, uh, because I smoked cigarettes already by then. And so I was addicted to nicotine. Yeah, or accidentally sipped a dipper. Dude, the worst was we played Grand Junction Central, which is on the other side of the Rocky Mountains. It was my junior year and I was like, backup outside linebacker, kickoff team. special teamer and backup uh willbacker so we like it's a trip we like have to drive through the mountains you have to drive through the fucking rockies but i was dipping and i had like three cans

of codiac and then i fucking and we're in the hotel the night before and i had a power aid bottle it was like watch tv and i was dipping and our coach coach anderson came into the hotel room and i was like and i just like held it to my lips or i'd go like like like fake drink it but it was spit so i'm like i like when he was just in the peripheral so he was like oh sonner's drinking his drink i'd like that or whatever but then he was talking to me for a while and i had a mini dip in so you could i probably knew and then like after a while i was like uh-huh and he walked out and i was just like a giant i didn't like it was it was hot Nate dipped Nate and Shane are my two friends that dipped the longest where like I would get

into a car and Nate would have like a die of mountain dew bottle he'd be like where's your spots at tonight and he'd be like like that or Shane on the road he'd do a fucking pack a lip snaple was the one everybody used in my day was a wide mouth great my friend's mom drank his spit my buddy oh my buddy's older brother andy used to dip and he put it in a mountain dew can that he fucking did it and it was heavy and it was on his thing and she was like vacuuming his room and she took a sip of it and then she threw up it like caused it a problem. Dude, my dad gave it to me young.

Dip? Yeah. What kind of dip? Copenh? So we had, I would do, this is how dumb it was, I would do a skull band at the pouch. Yeah. I would have some, um, either Hawking or Codiac. Cody, shout out.

It had fiber glass in it. Yeah. I don't know. A lot of people knew that. Uh, that's how you cut you little cuts to put it into your bloodstream. 100%. Oh, fuck. And I was like, how old are you?

I mean, we're in elementary school. That is way too early. I was going to give them a pass if it was middle school. But here, why? If we're being honest with each other, I genuinely regret not learning another language. I genuinely think I should have, should know two to three languages. I think the world would be a much better place if you knew what other people were saying instead of relying on interpreters or captions.

Try it out with Babel. Babel is all about small steps, big wins and progress that you can track and feel. They do like little tiny lessons. You can fit them right in. Easy to remember just 10 minutes a day. It's the only way that I was like, maybe I'll start learning Spanish because I should know it. I've worked in restaurants since I was 14.

All I know is like kitchen Spanish, which is just the curse words that my friends have taught me, probably not in good faith, probably just being like this giant wetro will go out there and curse. But how about I actually start learning Spanish? Because it battle lets you practice real life conversation. by step, no stress, going to build the confidence to speak up, and then, you know, finally maybe learn, you know, more progressively. But I'm saying, make fast, lasting progress with battle. They backed it with science. People much smarter than me were like, this is probably

the right way to learn a foreign language. And you're like, yeah, this is, I'm stupid. I need it to be laid out. But here's a special limited time deal for our listeners. Right now, get 55% off Babel subscription at babel.com forward slash soda get up to 55% off at babble.com forward slash soda spelled B-A-B-B-B-B-B-E-L dot com forward slash Spanish rules and restrictions may apply I got so sick from it obviously immediately I'm diary I'm throwing up all this I'm like why would you give that to us and he's like that's why so he told me he said I watched my uncle one time his uncle used to chew red man with the clug. So red is chaw.

So you put a plaw and what you do is the more you chew on it, the more juice, tobacco juice it squeezes out. Those are the guys that get the big spits. Yeah. Because when it's chaw, you're like, and they,

a lot of times in the major leagues in baseball, they'll do beach nut or they'll do red man mix with bubble gum. And the MLB is trying to stop that, but you can see, do like a Rafi, Rafi Deavis. Oh, he mixes it.

He still does. Oh, he's on the Giants now. Yeah. When I see a new guy on the Giants, I go, Rafi's got a fucking cheek in, but I'll be like, it'll spit like six times and you're like, well, that's chalk, because there's only something that can produce that much fucking liquid. But he watched his uncle fall asleep in a chair and swallow it.

And he said he just puked everywhere and everything. And then he's, then he's like, I did this and it made me sick. To this day, the smell of it. So you never went back after it? Never. It worked. My brother didn't either. I mean, I was like, I mean, as a father now, my daughter,

or is 11. She's in fifth grade. I can't imagine giving my kid dip. Make a throw up. But it worked. I can't stand winter fresh or any of that shit anymore. My mom was going to make me do the, when she caught me smoke and she was going to make me do the pack of a cigarette thing, but I didn't have a pack on me. I kept it outside in the guard. Where you smoke a whole pack? Yeah, in front of her to make me sick, but she was like, wear your cigarettes. I was like, I don't have any on me. I did. They were in the back in an M&M minis container in the rocks. to the left of the porch.

You missed it, you stupid mom. But dad would have fucked me up because my friend had to do it. He still smoked. I loved smoking, dude. The second I started smoking, I was like, this shit rules. I could never do it. I could take a three-foot bong hit, but I can't take a little of a cigarette. It will, not only will fuck me up, I'll feel it the next day.

I'll feel it in my skin, my lungs. I can't. I could have a cigarette burning in my corner look. I can look back in the, the day smoke you get my eye my nose take it out uh that looks good that was my little league i fucking loved it dude i put a cigarette in let it bounce a little bit while you're talking if i could smoke a joint and coach little league i would do it all day long shout out my friend johnny's dad johnny senior who is the fucking man black dude with a rat tail no that rules had a cool ass voice too

johnny's dad was the fucking man rat tail dude right dude with a rat tail and he was never in my light he'd be like Johnny the way he would talk, but he was a little coach. Johnny was a nasty athlete. He was my friend from my kindergarten. He was like nasty. Any sport he played, they talked to him into playing football freshman year. He was on varsity like by sophomore year starting. Like that kid.

He could flip too, couldn't he? Was he a kid in your school, he could do a flip? I'm pretty sure he could, but he was modest. So he, I don't think he would like, he'd get embarrassed if you're like, Johnny, he's fucking, but he'd ball out. But he was incredible baseball, soccer, basketball. of all football anything he played he was great at but his dad was a little league coached in the little league whatever they were the royals i think and we were on i was on in the reds but i would watch i was friends of johnny so like if we were playing at different times and i'd go watch this game his

dad would be on the chain link fence with a fucking newport outside coaching the team johnny johnny you beth and then he'd be smoking i was like dude johnny's seen your fucking rules that's where he's coaching from just the other side of the chain link fence i don't want to smoke getting in there It's coming right there. Not in front of the kids. And he'd come back again, but I remember him leaning against the fence, watching Johnny just rip a triple the fucking left. It was awesome, dude.

Dad's like that that just smoked and didn't give the shit about us. My little league coach 100%. We had a guy named Al. We were the Braves, and he would smoke during the games, during practice, and he would get down to show you how to bunt. I would still laugh at this all the time. He's showing you how to bump, but the cigarette's right here. Yeah, and it's, you know, the smoke's burning your eyes.

And you're like, and he's like, what's going? Why can't you see him? Like, because your fucking cigarette is burning my eyes. He'd get around you and stuff. Never take it out. He wouldn't put it down. He's like even offended if he does. He goes, fine for your fucking allergies.

And you go, you're burning my eyes. You're going to right. Yeah. Dude, my dad would like smoke. My dad would smoke a cigarette on the, he worked at a liquor store in Mill Valley. And my grandma lived in Greenbrae. So we'd have to drive every morning, like 6 a.m.

To go to it. And he'd get in the car and light up a cigarette. And he wouldn't roll down the window. for like a minute like he'd be like a couple things and I would be like and he'd be like oh yeah and you're like oh I'm sorry is my fucking clean lungs a problem for you also this tells me that when you do this by yourself you don't roll the fucking windows down yeah he lived a month I mean that boy that boy Gary lived quick and loose but I think everyone did back then everybody my aunt Marguerite didn't give a shit we get in a station wagon

it's my dad my grandma my three brothers she gets in she doesn't ask no just She just lighten up back there. You don't want to ask, nothing. Light up. She had the little case, the little leather one with the thing that would go like this, you know, and you undo it. She had our little, and we're like, I'm sitting next to you. Yeah, restaurants being like smoking or non-smoking.

People are like, can you believe these nonsmokers? I'm old enough to people smoked on planes. It blows, that one blows me away. That still blows my mind that you. That blows me when you're on a tube and there's a smoking section. Yeah. They call it. Do you know that Bruce Pritcher, the brother love from WWF,

tells the story of that's how they got the character of the million-dollar man, Ted DiBiase. What do you mean? Vince McMahon was on a flight, and a guy, a couple rows behind him was smoking a cigarette. And Vince McMahon went, hey, can you put that cigarette out? And the guy was like, no, man. He's like, how about $100? And the guy's like, no, he's like, how about $200? The guy's like, I'm good, man.

He's in first class. He's like, I'm good. And then Vince, like, kept giving money until the guy was like, all right, and just put out his cigarette. And then everybody's got a price. And then everybody's got a price. That's it. I think that's what Vince said to Bruce. And they made the million.

man. Everybody's got a price for the million dollar man. And it turns out he was right. He was just a billion dollar man now. He just changed that and it still works. Character still works. Except now he's got to be a snarky nerd that's on steroids. Man, I grew up watching wrestling too. I go back. I go back. Listen, just the other night, I went on, I go to a lot of YouTube now. Two things I've done. The other night I went and watched a super cut of all the general lead jumps. Great. Great. From Dukes of Hazard? Just the jump. great nothing else great just jump after jump of the of that charger great one after the other it's

fantastic it's like 20 minute super cut of just one after the other and every now and then a little whale and it'll get in there we'll be right back now it'll get a little one in there but every now and then it really is a cum shot compilation it's so great it's a fucking book you had a hundred come shot compilation you go I was just I was like somebody had to put this you go look at that hill he's about to bust you go ball the general bow he's buzzing in the air so i watched that and i watched and it's shorter than i remember it being uh hogan beat the sheik for the belt in oh that's quick that's msg they put the belt on i remember it they knew they were going to launch hogan pretty quick yeah and shiki was like a good he took

the belt off backlin that was the problem how do you get the belt off bob backlin and put it on holkogen you have the iron sheik do it and iran people did not like at the time yeah and i was really into the history of that too so i found out bob backlin wouldn't give that belt up to anybody because you know he's a legit tough guy that wasn't a real wrestler when they brought the sheik in they're like i mean wasn't he a bodyguard for like he was she went to the olympics straight up was like a real real that's what they said backlin had no problem handing it over to him but it wasn't to be like a yahoo yeah that was the end of the that was the end of the real tough guy yeah were they kind of like if you had the belt and you were out at night at a bar someone might fucking test you and if you

lose that belt you're not fucking yeah the bruno's Sam Martinos and shit back in the They would go to bars and guys would be like Oh, you're the heavyweight champ, I'm gonna fucking test you And if they And if they would have to beat the shit out of guys That's why they say the most dangerous guy that ever wrestled Was haku

Who was, uh, is that right? Yeah, no, he said he would fuck people He was like a street fighter He would like look for it. He would like, he would go to bars like hotel bars Yeah, yes Yeah But he was just a fuck and he's like he's great

His sons are in the WWU right now Tonga Loa and Tamatanga But they're fucking dude they talk about haku like you you want to fuck around how cool beat your ass we talk about all the time we were supposed to go see my brother and i got in trouble to this day again i don't know what we did but we were supposed to go see andre the giant wrestle killer con in a steel cage at the baltimore civic center great and we did something

you want to talk about smoking inside and my dad said we're not fucking going and we're like whatever dad's going let us go he's like you go inside you sit in that chair you go inside you sitting that chair and we fucking sat there all day no we kept thinking like he's gonna do it because he always would that time he fucking did oh no but we're going to see all the ones all that time he didn't do it and they also one time and I had to look it up because I couldn't remember if I made this up or not but they when I was a kid the high school I eventually went to they came and wrestled at the high school and then we looked it up and I guess they did go and they did it was in on the internet but I guess they would do these exhibitions like snooka and snooka was there

Jimmy Supervisor. What hell's that? What's interesting about wrestling is it's very similar to comedy and it's very similar to pro football. What we've been talking about was there was a time when it wasn't profitable where you had to do it because you were doing it. Because it was like a little clickish. It was always like a weird thing.

Like I try to explain to younger comedians now, guys in their early 20s and shit, that when I started doing comedy, you were almost ashamed to tell people. You were like, I do stand up comedy and people would be like, what? And now you go like, I do stand-up comedy and they go, so do I. And I also blog and I write and you go, I'm the reason you didn't get that weekend.

You go, cool, because I review soaps with my poodle. And you go, huh, but that's what wrestling would be like in a little, like you're taking the gig wherever then. But they're working the road. They're doing it for five bucks a night. They're just wrestling whenever they can wrestle

because they just want to do this shit. So some promoters out there being like, we'll find high school, we'll do whatever. And also, if you play football at the time, it was like in paper lines. The George Plimpton book, but the guy that was the dad in Webster, forget what his name. George Papinopoulos. George Papadopoulos.

He was a player. Vikings, man. Lions. Lions. Because he was in paper Lions. He would go wrestle in the offseason because that's what they were doing. And so then these guys, what's interesting about it is wrestlers became possessive of it the way comedians did. Back, we're going through what wrestlers went through. They're still kind of going through it because you got a guy like Logan Paul who's unbelievable.

in the ring but didn't come the right way didn't come up the right way and you got people struggling with that which there are guys that are like streamers and then they're funny and they can do stand-up if it works it works but they were like really protect because they used to have to go do fucking high school gyms the way we had to do after prom shows and on um american legions and shit american legions dude but that's same with us like i remember i was on bowling alleys american legions yeah someone i forget who we're hanging out with but we're at a show and Katie was with me. And someone was like, shit, Soter and I used to do after proms.

And Katie's like, the fuck is an after prom. I never heard of this. You would go do that at a prom? Well, dude. It's a New York thing. I was going to say, I've never even heard that from anyone. So what would happen is Caroline's, this I knew specifically of Carolines back when it was in Times Square, high schoolers would hire them to do an after prom comedy show.

So at one in the morning, there would be a comedy show with like me, Joe List, Aaron Berg and a couple of like whoever was at Carolines or at the school okay okay and these kids would come in and they get soda their after part it was horrible all these kids wanted to do was finger and jerk each other off and then we're sitting there going like dating am I right so I used to get blackout drunk and then I would do it like it was like a dare speech because Caroline's would pay you shit they'd pay you like maybe a hundred bucks and you'd go on at like 2.45 in the morning. So I wasn't

stopping my drinking for some pipsqueak so I would get drunk. I remember buying at the Duane Reed across the street from which I think it's still there. In Times Square I'd go buy two Corona 40s because they would close by the time I'd be done and I'd go to that green room. I'd smoke inside and I'd drink those

40s and then I'd go home. Babe Ruth in it before a fucking game. That was my diet. You want to see Jamesforders. Alcoholic intake before and after prom and I'd go up there and I go you guys don't you don't know I remember doing my rushing joke one time this girl goes that's racist and I was like shut the fuck up you just said there dude you made me have a flashback so I remember when dare came to our high school I graduate 91 so this would have been 90 because there's a year ahead it went to the high school

yeah they came to our high school that's too late came to high school you got to get them in elementary school like well i'm i'm 52 dare i don't know when dare came about but this would have been late 80s because i'm telling you early 90s early 90s i'm in fifth grade around 92 93 coming to my high school but they're coming to my elementary school because they're testing it in the waters i see who responds the best high school i would have by the time if they would have came in my high school i'm like fucking narts so they sent a a tray to pass around the auditorium with like fake drugs to what pills and It looked like glued to the thing. In Baltimore.

This point we're out in Carroll County. Okay. The tray goes back up. Somebody put a joint on it. It went back with more drugs. This cop was pissed. It went back to him with more drugs on it. Like, there's your fucking therapist.

As he's getting it, he goes, pretty intense stuff. Who put that in there? Who put that in there? That shot will never forget that. I was like, that's fucking ballsy. Who the fuck put that in there? smelling that joint. Sons of bitches.

Also, I need to talk to you after. His whole, I won't forget this either, his whole scared straight speech. So they would take, this is right before prom. So they would take a car

that they said was, kids died in for drinking and driving. It would throw that right on the lawn at the front of the school. You drive by and it's like three kids died

in that car drinking and driving for prom. You're like, my buddy at the junkyard gave you all that. That's so funny. That's such an East Coast thing. where they go, my dad works at the junkyard. That's where I grew up in a junkyard.

That's where I got this car right here in the junkyard. My buddy's dad owned the junkyard, so we grew up in this junkyard. But the other thing they would do, too, this guy, he came in, and he gave a whole speech about how a drunk driver hit him on duty, and he was in such peril that if they put him with the game, any kind of pain meds or put him out, they were afraid he wasn't going to wake up. He tells us this whole horrific story about the surgery he has to have with him. With no medication. State trooper.

Yeah. What are you in the Civil War? And we're all just like, what the fuck? And then he passes the drugs around and it goes back up with one more and he's just fucking. That's so funny. I had to be awake during surgery and you want to play jokes. It's so funny because my mom would like, she worked in insurance all the time. So she'd talk about work, but she worked specifically in medical malpractice.

So I would learn about like doctors and stuff and like what they were doing fucked up. So if that would happen, I'd go, well, you can't find a decent anesthesiologist. Like this fucking guy's full of shit. I go first off no insured anesthesiologist not being able to put anyone out that's the whole point of the thing yeah dude they always they would make stuff up

where they'd be like and then they died but I would go stay with my dad who at the time I was in there was living in that was already I was already up in Lake County so I'm already watching the motherfuckers that are like drinking and on death

and I'm going like this ain't how it is at all I'd prefer if he smoked weed you'd be fucking calmed down I tell him look after what happened me in the hospital, which is what my special is all about live and alive. Go watch it. Um, the one thing they told me that I, because I was like, I guess it's the end of marijuana and they're like, no. I was like, oh yeah, you guys are cancer doctors. Yeah. And they're like, so what they said,

and I want to make this very clear. They put, I have to be on blood thinners for the rest of my life and everything. So they're like, look, you should stop drinking. You should just stop drinking anyway. And I wasn't a huge drinker. I'm the type of guy that could have a six pack in the fridge for months. God bless you. I know. But I'm not saying it like I'm better than anybody. I have smoked a small forest. Sure. Okay.

I'm not. That's just the one that works for my body. What's wrong in mind. But they said, we prefer you to smoke or ingest nothing, obviously. We want you to be cured. They always say we prefer for you not to ingest. And these were the cardiologist, the pulmonologist, everything.

We prefer nothing. However, if you're going to take anything, cannabis is the thing that we recommend. Do not vape. Do not take any. tobacco products. Do not take anything with your blood and your lungs. And I'm like,

they're like, you can smoke with the clots in your lungs. I'm like, what? Like, it's not going to make anything any worse. Cannabis is not going to make it worse. Again,

you just up my intake. You shouldn't and we don't want you to. Bro. Come to my next episode. I go, Sickler said this is making me beat lung cloth. Sucler's surgeons said. Sickler's surgeon said that I won't have blood clots if I smoked this much of week.

He goes, I didn't say that at all. He goes, You say that a role that's absolutely misan promotion. It is a thing where, like, I kind of realize when I do it too much, but man, oh man, the drinking stuff for me is like, it would have been fun to rip. It would have been fun to have Babe Ruth's diet. You see that and you go, but what's funny about living in 2025 is we look at that diet

and we go, oh, no. But in the 20s, they go, well, if he's got the appetite for it, it must be healthy. You go, no, four hot dogs and four Coke. or you fat fox talk i think that's what i'm doing i always joked about like if i'm making into my 80s and stuff i do want to try heroin i do want to try these different things but now these amount of friends i've lost because of it yes right it's got to be good i'm gonna check in with but now i think i just want to eat myself into death yeah and i mean the like the sandwiches that are made out of pizza dough and they just all the that's where i'm going yeah we'll be a drug oh dude

I'm Babe Ruth in it from my 80s into whatever. When I get indigestion, that's when I'll take the heroin. You have to understand. It's a little bit of column A, a little bit of column B. We put it all together. The special is out now on YouTube. Go watch it. Click pause on this.

Then go watch Ryan Sickler's new special. Listen to the honey-dew. Listen to the way back machine. You're the fucking man. I hope you're a Ravens turn it around. And if they fire Harbaugh, Zach Orr's got to go first. Our D coordinator's got to go first.

And if maybe... Harbaal don't get fire mid-season. Let me just say this. He's done too much. The man has won us a Super Bowl and he's done too much. If he's going to go, he deserves to go down with the ship. You're right. That's his job.

Because also, what kind of messages that send to the next coach? Oh, here comes Dan Soder. Wait, I want to go coach for a team that that guy did all that and they just dumped them in the middle of one bad scene. Treat your man right. Even if you don't treat them right, let the motherfucker go down with the ship. Yeah, exactly. And then we can fucking build a new ship.

Exactly. I think a lot of us need that advice in our regular life. There it is. But you fucking rule, Sickler. Thank you, brother. Goodbye.