Soder - 126: Adult Field Trips with Justin Stagner | Soder Podcast | EP 124

Episode Date: March 24, 2026

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Golden Retriever of Comedy Tours, it marches on. April 4th, I'm going to be in Long Island, New York, where I'm going to be at the Paramount Theater. We added a late show. Tickets are available, Dan Soda.com. Then going to North Carolina, Charlotte. I'm going to see you, April 10th, Durham, April 11th, Dan Soder.com for all tickets. I'll see you guys all soon. And by the way, all tickets, all shows are up right now.

We even added Omaha, Nebraska, because I need to run the hour a couple more times. Funnybone. Dancota.com. Oh, and New Jersey. We added a show in New Jersey in June. And JPEC. DanSoter.com. Enjoy this episode.

I hope you're doing all right. I hope your weekend was good. Thanks for watching. Turn the volume down so your boss doesn't hear you. My stupid baritone voice coming through. Interrupting. Interrupting a guest. Oh, wow, oh, I thought.

like, what are you supposed to be doing your work? Don't listen to my podcast. Take a one here at lunch. But going to Alabama and then going to the science center of part of the United States. It's not like you can make the joke of like the science center of Alabama, which I think I was making that joke, which I thought was just a Burger King off the highway. But it's like actually where NASA is and like rockets and shit. Yeah. Dude, it was Huntsville's what's up.

That's the only place in Alabama. It was all of us took field trip, Suntzville. That was it? That was the field trip. That was the fucking field trip. That and we have a battleship from World War II where we were at. So those are two. They let you slide down the cannons and shit.

That's awesome. That's fucking awesome. Justin Stagner, my fans give me shit for not intro and people off the top. Oh, yeah. Follow him on Instagram. He makes fucking hilarious videos. I love him. But back to a cannon slide. Yeah.

Was that the finale? of the field trip. Yeah, dude, it's so crazy because nothing in there is updated. They left everything how it is, but then they've got vending machines in it. Really? Like what kind of like Coke?

Like Coke? Snack machines? Like Frito-Lay snack machines? Yeah. The works inside of a World War II where nothing's been touched except for that. It should be, and this is just me curating for field trips,

should be snacks from the World War II era in the vending machine. Oh, that would be great. You know what I mean? That would be great. Like a Pepsi can you open them with a can Yeah, yeah. You get lead poisoning from eating some of the snacks.

They shoot them out of the cannons. Watching the unathletic kids just miss. It's so crazy because they slide you down it. You go in first grade. That's when you go in first grade. And at no point, I guess you're young enough. They were like, they slide you down it. And everybody's just thinking, like, we killed people with these.

And you just, you know. Yeah, dude, there's a guy that grew up without a dad because of that cannon. Exactly. And now it's just parked out there. You can just slide down. a German guy taking his family after he moves here. He's like, I just feel like this isn't the right place. I just disgust our family a lot of grief.

Colorado, grown up in Colorado, field trips are all either nature or settling. Nature like hikes? Like Cave of the Winds. That'd be cool, though. You know, but it's wasted on children. That's true. That's true. Field trips are wasted on children.

But the parents get to go. And the parents are most of the time being like, what the fuck? But now that I'm an adult and my friends have kids and I know what parents truly are, which are people, now I know those parents are like probably gotten to a fight of who's going to go with them. Exactly. Because they're not enjoying the museum. They're not enjoying the battleship. They're watching kids.

So they can't go like, oh, fuck, this kid, like read a plaque. They can't read one plan. And dude, I'm the asshole dad. So I'm sitting there at the World War II thing and I was getting to the vending machines. I'm like, when the fact they invent these? You did the, you did the line from cable guy when Matthew Broderick is at medieval times.

Oh, yeah. Can I get a forks? There were no utensils at medieval times. Hence there are new utensils at medieval times. But they had Pepsi. Yeah, exactly. Dude, I had a lot of tables. I quote that to Janine Garofalo too much.

The cable guy? The Pepsi line. Oh, yeah. To the point where it's like, man, I think I'm that guy with her. Yeah. I know. Dude, it's one of those things where, like, I hate, you started out fun and then eventually you're like, oh, fuck, I think I've crossed the line. But I think the internet has blurred that for a lot of people. So they, like, especially being friends with someone as big as like Shane or Nate or Bert, people feel like they can just yell shit out like they're on this shorthand with you. And you see some crazy shit. I don't really have that. I have like a very low, but guys at the top, because you want to yell.

Exactly. Yeah. You've been waiting your entire life to see Tom Hanks and scream Wilson down the street. Exactly. Yeah. Do you have people yell shit at you from your videos? Of course. Southern Grandpa.

It's, dude, it's usually that. People have their thing. And I guess that's the cool thing is, like, finding out what their thing is. Yeah. So, like, people will yell a Southern Grandpa thing or they'll come up, like, square up with me. Or a lot of people like, like the Bushish stuff. Like, they love the whistling ass. Dude, with, you can do it so good.

Oh, I've got that. I have to. I have to. So my Herbert. is like off the charts. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, dude.

Yeah. It is. The whistle thing is like, I used to do it on the bonfire and it would take me a while to get there because you really have to like. It's a learning skill. My son already can do it at seven. I was like, you're going to be amazing. That's crazy.

That's, you're a baseball dad with voices. Yeah. No, here's. You go whistle talk practice in the garage. Yeah. And he said, it's a certain song that he can sing and get it going. Oh, really? You got to do that.

Rep it. That's the, uh, when, did you show? Show them the many adventures of Winnie the Pooh? Because that's the gopher. The gopher. Yeah, I forget his name. But the people, ever since I started doing the bushy's thing, like people tag, you know, they comment like, you sound like the Winnie the Pooh for.

Jimmy, yeah, Jim Cummings is the guy that does. I think he does the voice. He does the voice for Pooh, but I think he does the voice. And he does a run of voices that you're like. Oh, yeah. It's like that guy for the Looney Tunes that did all of them. Yeah, Mel Blanc. Yeah.

Yeah. They, um, but Jim Cummings did like Darkwing. duck in all these more. There was a video. We made fun of him on the bonfire, so I think he hates me. Because he was going through some shit and we made fun of it. And I did a character of duck. You ever feel like, I mean, when you're sitting here and you bring something up

and you make fun of it, like back in the day, it was just you and your friends on the couch bullshit. And now you're like, oh, 10 million people could see this tomorrow. I'm going to tell you right now, yes. No one has, he has to deal with that the most because what he deals with is me at like eight in the morning going, shit. I talk shit about someone on that. podcast. I can't go out. And I'm like, yo, Mike, I made fun of someone. Can you take that? Because

like, the fun part of doing this show is it's just straight up where I play video games all the time. So it really is my couch. People think this is a set. And you're like, no, I'm excited to take the lights down and play. Playstation. Yeah, exactly. Run my dynasty on college football. Damn right. But you get too comfortable. And then it's like, you do. You start talking shit. And then you go. Yeah. And then you cut it off and you're like, fuck, that was a little much. But that is like one of the things that I've always liked about comedy

is it is ball busty, but then you forget that this, it's entertainment. So you have artists, so there's also sensitivity. Yeah. Where you go, they're not taking it like back

of the bus ball busting. Like a lot of my friends do and a lot of comics I'm friends with, there are people who are like, that really upset me. I'm sure, dude. Because like, I love it. It's a way our minds work,

though, because I'll see somebody get arrested and I'm like, oh, this is fucking hilarious. And you write this real quick. And then you post a video about it and you start seeing the comments. You're like, I've fucked up, I think. A lot of it is we've lost the ability just to go. We need to bring back my bad.

That's true. Like my bad. Like I'm talking about all levels of society. All levels of society. People need to start being better at going like, my bad. Yeah. Because in real life, when someone says my bad, it deescalates the situation. Immediately you're calm.

Yeah. You're like, oh, dude. I thought Dan was getting fucking wild, but he was like, my bad. Yeah. It's just my bad. It is. My bad. It's just a two word.

It's just like you popping your seat out of the jet before it crashes. Oh, dude. You fuck, my bad. Yeah, you ever said something? And the last word, you're like, my bad. Like, it's not even, you don't even had time to think about it. I was walking. I was going to the cellar last night and I was walking down to the subway and there was a group

of like teenagers. And, you know, how old are you? 35. So I'm 42. So we're in the same. We're old, we're old. Right, yeah. We're old.

For sure now. We're not like real old, but teenagers look at us and they go, dudes and jeans. Exactly. They know this is us. They know I'm dressed up like a fucking, like a fucking heroin addict going to court. They go, that's his best sweatshirt. Yeah. But I also get that old man feeling when like teenagers are all the time.

In groups. I don't even realize when it happened. And you, what year did that? don't know. Did I remember one time my brother called me. He's way younger than me because it's like my dad and my stepmom. So he's way younger. So you're first marriage kid.

Right. Exactly. Me and my brother are locked in first marriage kids. And then I got a brother's sister from the, and it, dude, he called me. You're the tribunal of the elders. I tell this joke on stage because I don't know when it happened. My brother called me one day. And it was like noon.

And I was like, uh, what are you doing? He said, I just woke up a, but you're sleeping your fucking life away, son. I was like, what the fuck? What do you? I remember I used to get so mad at my mom. I was like, what do you care if I get up? I have nothing to do today. Yeah, or when I would go home for Thanksgiving and just get black out the night before Thanksgiving and then wake up and everyone.

And you're back at 17. Yeah, and everybody would hit you with the like, oh, I thought you were going to sleep all day. And you're like, well, I was drinking until five in the morning. Right. Technically, I pulled it overnight. I should have just powered through. Yeah. But I wonder what age it is that you're like, do these kids.

I know. But it just happens. Yeah, and I'm walking behind a group of like seven teenagers and they're laughing and they're having fun, but they're like kind of slow. And I'm like getting old man, old white guy mad. I'm like, you know, the sidewalk is the right sides for walking and the left. Start to sound like Lewis Black. There's a thing with the sidewalk. You're walking. But I am walking down the sidewalk and they break apart to get like a street meat or whatever, like getting food.

And they go to the park and one of the kids goes, oh, my bad to me, like that. You want my fault? Like that they were walking in it, I went, thanks. Like immediately, I was out of it. This kid's got self-awareness. Shook his hand. I go, you're going to be something someday young man.

Yeah, you're damn right. That self, that awareness is really going to take you to the top. But I hate when you're talking to one of them and they say something and you're like, God damn, dude. Like I was talking to a guy last night, I did a set at the stand. And he's way younger. He's asking me how to get into comedy. And I was like, I don't do it.

You know? And I said something, and I was like, you need to just like find, if you want to get on the road, find another comic that thinks you're good taking him with him. He's like dead ass, man. I was like, oh, yeah. Oh, fuck, man. You know, it's weird? It's weird to be on the other side because to this day, I vividly remember where I was. Not for 9-11.

Not for Columbine. But when my mom said, oh, that's DeBalm. Oh, yeah. I remember my mom said it sincerely. That was my 9-11, where I was like. in my head at that moment just in faded video the two buildings are collapsing

that plume of fucking shit's hitting my kitchen my mom goes oh that's the bomb and I went like what the fuck lady what the fuck are you doing she's trying man do it that's like she brandished a firearm that's actually a great video that you should make

but it was just like she pulled and then I so it's weird to be on the other side when someone's like uh it'd be like you said dead ass right now. If I was like, but they say it to me and I go, oh.

Like I, you even know, you go, I couldn't say that. I could never go like dead ass. No, I'm dead ass. Because that was a real, that was a New York thing. That's like a super New York thing. Oh, it started up here. Yeah, dead ass is absolutely New York. Well, it's, you know, Alabama's like 10 years late for everything.

So we kept the mullet too long and all that. You guys were like in the 90s when Russia was getting our rock from the 80s. Right. That's exactly right. Now like our classic rock station is playing shit 10 years too late. Mint Mobile. Stop overpaying for wireless just because that's how it's always been. Mint exists to fix that problem.

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That's stitchfix.com slash soda. Start shopping. You get styled today at Stitchfix.com slash soda to get $20 off your first order. One last time. Stitchfix.com. Slater. Last Sodor. Alabama, though, is one of those places where it's such a, like, different cities, different energy kind of thing. When you do stand-up, did you start in mobile? Yeah, I had to. I was doing the videos, and they took off, and I've been writing stand-up for like 10 years,

just never had the boss to do it type of thing. And somebody tagged a local guy, and he was like, I actually run some mics in town, if you want to ever come try. Had you ever done stand-up before? No, but I tell people it. like I worked at a still mill and I'm telling jokes to a room full of strangers, that type of thing. You just crack the code.

Yeah, I mean, it's anybody that's had a real job and like worked with their hands. Yeah. And done like real. Because you know those are some of the funniest people in the world. That's what I mean. You know,

none of these, none of these nerds are going to. Yeah, they don't know real ball breaking. It really was like, that's such a thing. It's weird because it's like, remember when MMA found out that if you had a wrestling

background. You were just going to be better. Exactly. That's a perfect analogy. They're like, oh, you're just going to, you're going to control the match. You're going to have the wind. Your wind's going to be up. That's what it's like with people that worked blue collar jobs. When I find out someone worked a blue collar job and they do stand up, I go, you're fine. Yeah, you're going to be all right. It's just reps. That makes sense. It's just reps at this point. It is. It's like a lot of stand up is reps. And you, I remember older comics telling me that and when I moved here in my 20s being like and then you see it pay off and you're like it was crap dude it's it's literally like and as you know working a blue color job as soon as you show them

you could do impressions or like have a joke or something you're like a dog with a trick I'm gonna get everybody else the only blue collar work I ever did was the summer I worked at cannery in Alaska I remember I remember seeing this on a pod and the bit that murdered with you saying that was me doing an impression of the of the processing boss oh that's you're fucking right to the top with that if you can make if you can do the boss perfect dude then i would put him in situations that would make these guys laugh exactly i think one of the bits i did his name was now people try to argue with me with us online his name was aladdin that's how they pronounced it yeah Filipino aladdin but then they told me it was aladdin and he was fucking with me but i'm telling you right now his

cousin would call him aladdin right but i do this thing called aladdin in the processors like he was like a 50s band and he was like it's not good it's no good it's no good that card is no good these guys would be like Justin I would be killing of cool yeah that was the moment where I was like oh I think I'm going to do stand-up when I get back to Arizona that really was the moment did those guys out there ever tell you just from like my experience those guys out there do you miss your fucking calling you should not be here with yeah they're like that type of thing they would say two things to me they would either go you should do stand-up or they would go man I like working with you.

Right. That's the same thing. They told you the same thing twice. And you go like, we're not getting good work done here. No, not at all. Like running behind.

I'm here for the comedic relief. But I always felt like you should find the thing in your life that you like doing that gets you in trouble at other jobs. That's like a job that you're bad at. Whatever you do to kill time, push your life in that direction.

Yeah, exactly. Just got like for me, it was always, because like I said, the Alaska thing was, but I was a waiter. That was the thing I did. I was always a waiter. Always working at restaurants.

And my favorite thing were smoke breaks or being at the hutch making people laugh. And I was like, that's just my energy. And then podcasting. Yeah. And podcasting is the smoke break. Yeah.

Well, dude, even when I was bartended and waited tables, same exact thing. Like, that's the favorite part of that is making all your coworkers laugh. I would go to sometimes and be like, I'm going to go to all your table's Irish.

All night. Yeah. You can go to go to all your tables Irish. I'd be like, fuck, yeah. And I'd go there and people, pick up on it and I'd be like, well, I've been in the States a little while. It's not, you know, getting a little Southern rubbing off there.

That's so funny. You're falling back into a Southern accent, someone's like, I'm drunk, man. This guy, I can't find. I remember one time my friends came in and I didn't have their table. And I'm over there, I'm like, can I get you anything to drink? Some sweet tea or some Coke. And I just remember looking at my friends were just going like, what the fuck is he doing? Changing your voice or fucking with tables.

I got to a point where, you know, I worked at a restaurant in Midtown in the cafe was like cool. This is 07. The cafe was like, cool people would come in on Thursday nights and they would want to be cool or they'd want to drink Petron and they would want to be on 3rd Avenue and 50th and 3rd and being like, you make good money, you know,

because the bills were high, but they were dicks. And I started doing bits to make me and my friends laugh. And I, depending on who the manager was, I would get away with it. But in the summer, we'd have to put napkins because we had metal water pitchers. Yeah. So we'd have to put napkins over the water so it wouldn't melt the ice in the pitcher, right?

So we'd have these pictures on the hutches with napkins over them and then water pitchers. And I would do shit to make the other waiters laugh. Like I would, I would wait until a guy would pull. And then I'd pull the napkin off like it was a trick. Like I was a magician. And I was revealing the pitcher of water. So they would walk by and I'd go like, and I'd go like that. But they'd be walking by me and another waiter.

I'd be doing it for the other waiter. Of course. I'd be doing for that guy. But you'd come by and I'd go like that. Or I would, if I knew a waiter, because the tables were pretty close, I would water tables, but I would do it like I was a rock star. So I'd go, table 340. It's been a while since I've seen you.

I'd like pour the water. And it was in 0708 after the housing market collapsed. Yeah. So most of the time, all euros. That cafe was Spaniards, Italians. Yeah. So I could say shit that they wouldn't even. Yeah.

They'd go, huh? Right. But the other, you know, like. They're dying. Your buddies are dying. My friend Sarah is like laughing at her table, giving the specials. And I'm going like, 342. It looks like you need water, no gas.

And they'd be like, well. I mean, it is like being, and then that's why when I see comics complain about the road or complain about anything, I go, dude, I should be, I should be at a restaurant right now. Yeah, it's true. I should be going through the specials appreciate it. Yeah. I shouldn't be able to set my own schedule. Dude, I remember whenever I was in, I was, I grew up a wrestling kid just like you did. Yeah, yeah, dude, check it out.

People send me action figures about it. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah, dude. And I'm like, yeah, don't stop. Yeah, don't stop now. I used to give people sweet chin music in the restaurant, like my managers and shit. And dude, this one day, you remember at the end of the day when they just pour buckets of water on the floor to mop it? Yeah.

Dude, I gave him some sweetching music and soaked his watch. Like, it was all on my foot when I kicked it. So you do the full kickup. Oh, yeah. And slap my leg. It sounds like it. Yeah. It's the leg slap for all you wrestling fans.

Turn heel. Yeah. So that's what I do. That's what I do on the road. Ask Sagalow. We were in Cleveland. My phone's in my pocket so I can't do it. But we were in Cleveland, and the way the green room is at hilarities is you come out the back,

and it's like two hallways like this. So people would come around the hallway. If they'd go to the bar and it'd be like Jimmy Graham would be MCing. And you come around and I go like, oh my God. Dead soda just turned heel. Or like Sagalow would come around and I'd go like and I'd do the kick. We went to Raw and I showed Katie that. She didn't know that's how they did it.

Oh, yeah. And I said that to her and she went, I wish you wouldn't have told me that. Dude, I got a buddy. Like my best friend got really into it. Like hardcore Holly and a few of those other guys are from Mobile. And they started like a little wrestling school down there. And he went to it like when we were in high school. So he learned all these bullshit drinks to tell me about.

I love that. Yeah. So I got to know. Dude, I would do this to all the little like 90 pound girls and all the dudes would be laughing. They'd be like, what the fuck is your problem? I was like that was that close to your chin. Dude, my buddy, one of my closest friends, Vic, he was like my old roommate, big Mexican dude, huge wrestling fan.

He got me back in when I was out from 18 to 23. He was like my guy that brought me in back into wrestling. But we were at our friend Greg's house. And this is in Tucson. And we're just chilling there. And Vic could do the open palm thing. Oh, wow. And he just chopped Greg out of nowhere.

And Greg was like, what the fuck, dude? We were caused a real problem. We were talking about that a couple months ago when I saw both of them in Tucson. And it was like hilarious because he just went like, he did the Andre the Giant. That big fucking Paul. Like a bear paw Yeah And getting a chop

Like that So you're back into it now I mean I've been back into it since I was 23 So I've been like It's been 20 years I've been back in Oh yeah

Since 2006 So I recently I got invited to go to like SummerSlam like two years ago So I went It was in Cleveland Yeah Yeah

And I was watching it And it's so crazy Because like When I was a kid And I realized it wasn't real I was like Oh god damn it My whole childhood's a lot

How old are you? I would say usually like the probably 10, 10, 11 range, somewhere in there. It's great, yeah. Yeah, and then I came back to watch this, and the funniest part about it to me was like,

now you're appreciating the athleticism. The movements. Right, all of it. That's what you're watching. You go, I can't move like that. But it's so funny to watch another guy who's 40-something years old, and he's like, turn around, Ralph,

and you're like, give me a fucking break. But that is, and every wrestling fan will tell you, is that there's an unspoken agreement when you walk into that arena that we're all going to treat this like it's real. And I think that's why it's such a great environment for kids. Oh, it's a great for kids. Because they go in and they go like,

they see adults pretending without telling each other or making each other feel bad for it. Because I think that's what non-wrestling fans don't understand is. We know it's fake. Right. Don't piss on us. We're just trying to have fun.

I will say people in Alabama didn't. Like my grandpa was shaved his head, because it's Stone Cold Steve Austin. Like that ass. I mean, he would literally be watching Rawl with us and be like that. Like if somebody talks shit to Stone Gold Steve Austin, my grandpa would be like,

he couldn't whip a picture of Stone Cold Steve Austin. Like he fucking looked at. That's a cool ass sentence. Yeah. He couldn't whoop a picture of Stone Cold Steve Austin. It's a badass sentence. But you know why is because we're a different generation now. Now we're the adults that understand what marketing and a work is.

Oh, yeah. Where I think like I think your grandpa, my parents, generation was the last generation to go like, you know, Rick Flair is incredibly wealthy. Yeah, maybe so, yeah. Sure, but I think he also probably owes a lot of money to the tag. You know, like the real thing of it. Like, they would go like, you know, I think it all comes down to that story of Iron

Sheik and Hacksaw Jim Duggan getting caught smoking weed together in a car. Yeah. And they were doing like a big feud. And they said like that was the thing that killed like wrestling being real to adults. Well, that and the. The curtain call. Right. The X.

Yep. Exactly. Exactly. But like you could have told my grandpa that and he would have been like, I don't fucking know. I'm pretty damn. You know what I mean? Pretty convincing.

Yeah. Everybody in Alabama thought everybody on TV was a millionaire. Like if you were on TV, you're fucking, you're rich. You've made it. I don't think they were wrong. I think at a certain point, like up until like the 60, when there was like four channels before cable. Oh, maybe that's true.

Yeah. You're like, that guy's probably got money and you're like, but you know what's interesting about that is we get older and we look back. to like how the, because like you're just making videos, you're just going like, oh, that's funny. I'm going to do that. And then making it and having it up within, how long is it like a week to make a video sometimes? It depends. So like if it's just like a regular skit, I can get it done pretty quick.

So the whole thing, editing and all might take me an hour. See, that used to be like you had to go to a television station. Yeah, exactly. Get out of a set. You had to go get, well, who's going to build the set? Exactly. Are we going to film this one thing? Somebody's going to get audio.

And this is all money. This is all money. And then you realize all those people on TV, I was talking about this recently, an episode, they have like contracts with studios. So it's like that big house they live in, that's the studio's house.

Yeah, that's not their house. They're getting paid a salary from the studio. And you're like, oh, it's way different now. So wrestling back in the day, they were like,

junkyard dog beat up anybody. And you go, yeah, probably in the south. But if he went to like Minnesota, I bet they'd make a, lose to like whoever their champ was. Or he goes to

North Carolina, he's probably going to lose the flare. Of course. And they had to like protect that and then now you're kind of like now we're all going to choose to pretend. Yeah, well they should. I mean that's what keeps it alive. It's the best. It's the best. I got into an argument with a nine year old that I didn't

know at SummerSlam 2016. I probably know what you're going to say. Go ahead. What were you arguing about? It was Sina versus AJ Stiles. Yeah. And Sina's music hit, and that's when the crowd, because now they act like everybody loved them. Sure. But in 2016, the chant was, John Sina sucks, John Sina sucks.

And then the counter chant that happens in wrestling where they'd go, John Sina. And so there you go, John Sina sucks, Johns. And me and this kid were doing it back and forth. Because he turned around and saw me and he was like, I've had multiple sporting events of talk shit to children. So he was like, he was like, John Cena. And then I was like,

John Sino sucks. He's doing like that older. He turned heel. Yeah. And then a John Sino won the match. And the kid looked back and I went like, and he was like, and you saw this kid have this moment where he was like,

yeah, he told all his friends of that shit. He was like, yeah, dude, this guy was cheering for AJ Styles. But you, you know what I mean? Oh yeah. Yeah, it's perfect. That's the fun part of wrestling.

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Visit cash.com. slash legal slash podcast for full disclosure. Dude, what I get into arguments with with kids with about wrestling is like, they don't understand, and they try to tell, like there's no, I can say it all day long. There's no way to convince them of the pandemonium that would happen when the glass would break and Stone Cold Steve Olson would come out. And I will see that.

I was like if he had an Instagram then, he'd have a billion followers. I will see your glass breaking Stone Cold, which is true. It's the number one pop moment in the world. But being eight years older than you, you don't know what it was like when Hogan's theme. See, but I won't argue that. I will agree with you. And I mean, after everything we know about. Hogan would have also had a billion followers on Instagram.

Hulk Hogan shit hit in that. Oh, yeah, I can only imagine. As a child, it made me understand Pentecostal churches. Because it would lift me. The spirit would lift me. Hulk Hogan on Saturday night main event and some shits going down,

especially the mega powers. Listen, when you're a kid, you love Hulk Hogan, you grow up to love macho man Randy Savage. Because you realize Savage was the one that was selling it, that was doing the end of, ring work. Right. He was the reason

that mega powers thing was perfect. Hogan just had to be the all out good guy. Right, exactly. He had to be easy. Oh, brother, I'm just trying to help you.

Macho man was jealous. You got jealousy in those eyes. But it was like, shit that is an adult, you understand way more. True. You go, dude, if my buddy was hanging out

with my girl and touching her small back, I go, what are you doing? Exactly. I'm a macho fan. Yeah, but as a kid, you're like, Hulk Hogan's a good guy

and you just leave him alone. Turns out he wasn't. Everybody's like, turns out, he's just a good guy. And all he doesn't care about America. Turns out there's all these stories. Turns out it's,

let's just not bring him up to Johnny Jones. You're like talking about your black friends? I don't bring him up around. But it is like, you see that and you go, oh, that's storytelling for adults. I always liked cartoons

that when you watch them, like the Simpsons. Yeah. The Simpsons, you could get into it as a kid, but you also, realize it's making your sense of humor better because the jokes are for adults. Exactly.

Storylines like the mega powers colliding is like, oh, you get that as an adult. You're like, I've been jealous. Right. Well, dude, it's a bunch. All that shit that you watch as a kid, like I, I watched stuff way above my age grade, like when I was growing up. Does that happen anymore? That's what I was going to say.

I think that really sharpens all your, because you, even the jokes you don't understand. You're like, my dad laughed at that. What the fuck? That was the biggest thing for me. Right. And you're just sitting there like, so that's, I got to figure out what the fuck that means. I remember watching my dad laugh to Rodney Dangerfield.

Yeah. And I didn't understand the jokes, but I understood that he was funny. And watching how hard he made my dad laugh, it was that HBO special where he had the young comics up. We'd watch that all the time where he has like young Bill Hicks, young Kinnison. It's like, you can watch him. There was a series they did on HBO with Dangerfield hosting at Dangerfields in New York. And it's like, it's just him at the club.

And he was like just killing. I watch my dad and be like, yo, he's laughing. Dude, that's how I felt when we watch Martin. Like, what you used to watch Martin with my dad and them? They'd be rolling off the couch laughing. I was like, this is the funniest fucking dude alive. Martin, funny-wise, gets overlooked so much. Oh, my God, it's hilarious.

You go back and watch it, it's still funny. Yeah, they play it. It's that and Golden Girls are the two most rewatchable shows. Martin really- My wife's favorite show is Golden Girls. We go to bed to it every night. It's on Hallmark. She puts it on her phone to go to sleep to. That's really, we do the same thing.

Yeah. And then every night, without fail, Katie will go, God, the fits. She's like, she's every time that, because whenever they're in nightwear, they're always like, they got like three letters on. Yeah, dude, they look good. All of them have different, but good looking outfits. Because the Golden Girls was the thing I would watch with my grandma that we both could appreciate it. Right, exactly.

Because he was just so funny. It was. It really was. writing on that. Dude, the bloopers that I watch that you can watch now, they're telling each other

dirty jokes between those. I was like, I was, that's hilarious. Betty White telling that joke to Blanche. I call her Blanche. I do too.

No disrespect. I usually call them all by their names. Yeah. By their show names. I mean, like Dorothy's on one today. But I don't know if, if they do that anymore.

I think that's a disservice to children is make them. I agree. My dad used to let me watch Mel Brooks movies because he was like, you probably won't get the jokes. now, but when you get older. Yeah.

Like young Frankenstein. I didn't get three-fourths is a joke when I first started watching. No, even shows that were kind of like in the middle, like watching Ace Ventura, a pet detective or like when nature calls. I mean, that blew up. I was 11 years old when that came out in movie theater. And I'm going to tell you that phenomenon. Two things that get, that weren't, the internet wasn't around to watch people overkill

or three was Rick, I'm Rick James, bitch. Sure. Because as a, as a huge Chappelle fan, the first time I heard someone scream, I'm Rick James bitch. We're at a bowling alley, drinking beers bowling, and I heard it and I was like,

the idiots found out about Dave Chappelle. Yeah, he was our best kept secret. Yeah. It felt like a band. Ace Ventura coming out in sixth grade and kids talk, trying to talk like Ace Ventura.

Yeah. It was an epidemic. I bet it was. At middle schools? Yeah. Kids go like, oh. Right. I caught the second one first.

Great. It holds up. It was amazing. And then the one that really, really, really shook the world was Beavis and Butthead. Yeah. And when I was in sixth grade, it came out. Dude, have you ever heard, is it Mike Judge? Yeah.

Have you ever heard him talking about the old voicemail he got of how he got the voice for? Butthead? I can't remember, but it's got a voicemail from this guy. No, I think he's talking about how he got the voice for Boom Hour. And it's this guy. No, it is a Beavis and Buda. He's calling how he don't like. He doesn't.

like Beavis and Butthead. He's complaining about it. But it gives him the voice for Boomhauer. Oh, because he goes, really? Yeah, so he calls and he's like, every time that dang old Porky's butthole comes on, man, I just can't stand it. He thought Beavis and Buddy was called Porky's Butthole for whatever reason. So then he saved that voicemail and turned that into Boomhauer's voice on King of the Hill. Yeah. I think Mike Judge is a guy that

I put him at my, if you could have dinner with five people. Oh, yeah. It'd be Matt Trey, Mike Judge would be three of them. Oh, yeah. Well, that's, you've knocked it out of the Park already. Matt and Trey and Mike Judge. Those are some of my favorite bloopers ever. That's what's great about Instagram.

Yeah. You get the reels of Trey doing the voiceover because the first time I saw them do that was the documentary Six Days to Air. And they're doing the human centipad episode. Which is probably the most famous one. Yeah. And it shows them writing it. And like Trey, I've watched a documentary so many times, but Trey like hates it.

Yeah. Or he doesn't think it's that good. He doesn't hate it. He's like, doesn't think that's good. But it shows him doing the voiceover where he's doing the Japanese businessman. He's like, he's like, oh, Kyle, do you want me to eat vanilla paste or cardo fish? And then it's Matt laughing going, Van der Leiface, Van der, he goes, cardo fish. That makes me laugh.

Oh, dude, that one and the one where it's him and Bill Hater and he's talk. He's also doing another Japanese voice. He's like, apparently China and Japan are separated by huge body water. Oh, really? Oh, really. And then they cut to him. Yeah, that was always, I remember the family guy was like a weird thing because family guy, when it came out, it was on, then got canceled.

Yeah. And then I got brought back on. They were like how it made a lot of money. It was the first internet hit that brought it back because Kazam or Kazam, what was it? It was Kazah. Kazah and like those downloads. You could download long wire and all that shit. Download full family guy episodes.

We used to smoke swag My freshman year of college Shout out to the errands We'd go over to their They had like Off-campus dorm Where you could like We could smoke weed

And we wouldn't get in trouble Sure And we'd go over there And they would He would bring it up on his computer And he'd be like You want to watch this cartoon family guy And you're like

Dude this is the best Right And then the first time I saw Seth McFarland In the voiceover booth I noticed he did his Peter Out of the side of his mouth Like the way he goes like He actually kind of looked like Peter

When he was doing it Jeez, I don't know, Lois. And it's like over here and you're like, oh, the way he moves his mouth, I think that shit. Your voice is like doing accents and shit. You watch and you go, oh, that's how they do it. Right. I love hearing people explain how they do it. Like Frank Caliando.

That was just going to bring him up. He's the best of, I mean, Caliando. I brought up Jay Farrell on the Bobby Moyen. I missed not saying Frank Caliando. And he explains how he does it. You'll be hearing him talk about going deeper in his throat and shit like that. I was like, ah, damn. I've never.

thought of it like that. I always just sit down and keep trying. Yeah, he's cool as hell too. Oh, is he? I can imagine, dude. I was doing a show at the Tempey improv and he came by and did that. That's awesome. I love that place. Fun room. Yeah. He came by and did a guest set and I was like, I was like, I was like, I used to listen to your OPE and Anthony John Madden clip. Oh my God. Dude, so good. When he used to call in his Madden to O&A and he would also do, I mean, he was, he's just the best. He did a, he does one of my favorite things where he does a video. of voices doing Star Wars and he does like Michael Keaton is Yoda

That's great And it's perfect Yeah I bet it is How did you get there? But he does like the sniffle He goes Dude do you ever have voices where you You can say a few certain words right

And you're like I just cannot fucking nail this That's me with an Australian accent I can do like raw and stuff like But when I go to talk and I'm like dude What is going on? I've you know I think I've made a career out of being a fraud because I think I only can do like four or five sentences in each.

That's me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unless it's like a forest gump or something, or a sling blade. Yeah, macho man, Paradise PD just let me cut promos in the voice booth. Yeah. So that was the one where I could stay in it. But every other thing I've tried. Yeah, your macho is the best I've ever heard.

That was that. Thanks, man. I don't know. That was the best I've ever. Truly boredom sitting there. Look, my brother's not like big into like watching. and stand up like the way I am. But I told him I was doing your pod.

And he's like, he's like, dude, get him to do macho man. He's like, hey, does he do anything else? You do stand up? I was like, yeah. But I'm fine with that. I, like, wrestling fans, when I go to Raw and shit, I bet, they'll be like, macho man. You're like, yeah.

And it's been cool. Like, I got put in that A&E biography because I'm such a big matron man fan. Yeah. And the guy that made it made like the U. He made, he's awesome. Billy Corrigan. He's like an awesome director. And, but he, he edited the documentary in a way where it looked like I took the death

of macho man very lightly. Because if you watch the documentary, it's a very serious part of the documentary where they're like, we lost him. He died or whatever. And then it cuts to me and I'm like, dude, what a badass way to go out. He had a heart attack and drove his Jeep into a tree. tree. What a bad motherfucker. Took two things to kill him.

Took a car accident. They had a heart attack to kill him. Yeah. You couldn't just kill them with one thing. And a tree. Dude, that documentary came out and I had real heat with wrestling fans. Like death threats, people, people up in my shit, people threatening that docks me. And I'm like, dude, I don't know.

And then the coolest thing happened, which is the wrestling world responded with people. Like Eric Bischoff was on a. podcast being like, hey, a lot of you guys are mad at this guy. Leave him alone. He said the coolest thing in the world. He goes, I knew macho man in real life and I worked with him for years. He would have loved that that guy. That's the coolest.

Yeah. That that guy put him over. That's what he said. He goes, he put him over. He made him look tougher. He goes, macho would have let his, he was like, Randy would have led his documentary with that because it put him over. And I was like, coolest compliment ever.

I was in a hotel across the street from the Columbus Funny Bone. And someone texted me that, and I listened to that episode. And I was like, I'm in the NWO, motherfucker. Damn, right. That got me to join the NWO, dude. The most hype I probably ever got was when Stone Cold liked one of my videos. Dude. Coolest fucking thing ever happened to me.

I'll tell you right now, he's the man. When we did, Dan St. Germain and I wrote a cartoon that we sold the peacock with Steve. So we would get on Zooms with him. And the first time he pops up in a Zoom, it's like, it's the same way I felt the first time I saw Jerry Seinfeld in person where it's like I've watched you for so long and you've been such I've watched you and I was sick I've watched you when I was happy I've watched you and I was sad I've watched you to all these different things you've been a part of my life the way old like stone cold matches

are like the way that I watch Seinfeld yeah yeah yeah put it on and you lay back I'll watch an old stone cold documentary in a heartbeat love it yeah so the first time I see Seinfeld I was like holy shit. Yeah. He was like walking down the street up into the comedy club and I was like, oh my God, the fucking Seinfeld was the first time that Stone Cold popped up in the Zoom. It was during the pandemic and I was like,

yo. Dude, I'd have been transported back to being eight years old. It's the funniest thing my mom said. We were on a notes call with him where he was like telling us what he liked and didn't like when we were writing the show. Yeah. And it was Christmas and I was at my mom's house.

And it was like two days before Christmas and I'm on the phone with Steve and Dan and Steve. like I know him. It's fucking stone cold in St. Germain. And he's given us notes. And I get off the phone and my mom's like, I swear to God you were 12 years old again.

She was like watching buzz around the house on the phone. Because I was just like, yes, sir. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, because he's like. No argument here. One of the things is he was like, y'all got me driving a Jeep. Nah, I'll drive a Dodge.

I'm going to drive a Dodge, big Dodge truck. And I go, okay. I want a cows socky side by side on the back of it. Yeah, like stuff like that. We're like, okay. And you go like, when you would say, you go, oh, yeah, like under his breath and you're like, it was very cool.

He was really, and then like, that's like the shitty part about like the entertainment industry is like I got to talk to him for a little bit. And then the project. Yeah. As it dwindled the way, you're like, he caught, he butt dialed me once because I'm in his phone. Yeah. And he's in my phone is Steve Austin.

That's exactly what he'd be in my phone as. How embarrassingly fast I called him. back. Katie tried to stop me. I go, oh, Stone Cold. Hey, you were breaking up, I couldn't hear you. She was sitting next to me. And I go, Stone Cold, Miss Call from Stone Cold.

And she goes, it might be, she couldn't even finish butt dial. And I was like, hello? It was just sitting there. I go, call him back. I hope he picks up. This is what to voicemail. You don't even tell her it's Stonego? I'm Steve.

Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Rattlesnakes. Rattlesnakes calling me. She goes, Lewis J. Gomez. And you go, no.

That's the Puerto Rican Rattlesnake. Yeah. But I mean, when you started making, what made you start making videos, sketches? Were you just watching them online and you're like, I got an idea for one? So I put up a video of my wife making fun of her one time because every now and then she'll say something like really country out of nowhere. Yeah. Those videos are great. Yeah.

She sounds like everything she said has been deep fried first. And so I put it up and it got like 10,000 views, which when you have nothing is like crazy. Yeah. You feel naked. My mom, I'm a star. And, uh, I was like, well, dude, fucking old Southern men are way funnier. So I just started doing like jokes that my grandpa would say.

And then once those took off, I was like, I'm going to start doing skits. And I just started writing skits. Yeah. Yeah. You know what it is, man, is it really is a thing where a lot of, I think you can sit and complain about like there's no industry. There's no gatekeepers or whatever. But what it does do is it gives creative people an immediate like platform. Yeah.

Like I'm in Mobile, Alabama. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. By the way, you know, so funny. I feel like I have to say mobile. I have to say it because when I go mobile. Yeah.

My Colorado accent going like mobile, mobile, mobile, mobile. I feel like I'm like, you know, when my mom orders wine, sometimes she'll do a, she'll be like, can't get this saumignon blanc? Oh, yeah. You're like, don't do that. I can't even try. I feel like that's how I do when you say mobile. I go, mobile.

What am I doing? No, that's right. I go, I know. You're saying it 100% correct. I know, I know, I know, the fun of my mom over and wine. The funniest part about that is, you know it was mobile. And the people down there is like, we live in Mobile. And that just stuck.

New Yorkers do it with Houston Street. And they go, it's Houston. You go, don't do this to me. Yeah, no. Don't do this. I've grown up my whole life calling it Houston, Texas. It's so hard. That is the, nobody says Mobile that's not from Mobile.

Yeah. That's why I feel like it's like almost, I feel like a poser. I'm like, Mobile. I tell people, Mobile is the only part of Alabama that looks like that because it's on the bay. Okay. The little, you know,

Alabama's got that little like nut sack down there. Yeah. That's like Alabama Florida line. Yeah, exactly. So like we're the only

part of Alabama. It's got a beach and the bay and all this shit. So we look nothing like the rest of Alabama. And it really is. You guys are more like a Florida look down there. Right.

Yeah, yeah. We went down there for Burt's tour. We did the show down and like at Florida, Alabama. Oh yeah. Like at the Florida memo? We went to Florida Bama. We went to the bar.

Marcus King did a show. It's awesome. Went up and did it. But I was like, this does feel just like Florida. Yeah, it's the same. It's like a beach. That part of Alabama feels the same as Florida.

What is the cutoff for Alabama Auburn? Is Auburn, is that geographical or is that just choice? All over the place. Like my mom and brother, Auburn fans, the whole rest of the family of Bamma fans. What is that? Because I don't think people realize that that is a, I could talk about Colorado, Colorado State all I want. But you bring up, like I went to Arizona.

We hate ASU. Sure. the state isn't really divided by it. It's more like, that's us. It's not, it's not like a, yeah,

the schools are like an actual debate. And I'm sure like the little circle around them is, but the rest of the state is just like pick one. Is that how you figure out? You go like, they'll go like War Eagle and they'll figure out who is. Oh yeah. Well,

a roll tide, you'll either, if you give a roll tide in a room, it'll be like, you'll see the faces. And there's one guy just being like, you're like, ah,

there he is. That does have to stop. That's an Auburn fan. If you're in Auburn. fan that does have to suck that your rival has the better catchphrase or the more known catchphrase. And it's also, it really does suck also that like we've completely fucking dominated. Like, yeah.

I mean, you had saving. Yeah. And even, but like, people think that the, and there are. There's a shitload of bandwagon feds down there. It's like, dude, I was there for all the Mike Schuller years. It was awful. Shout out Mike Shula. Yeah, I do.

I do love Mike Shula. It is weird. I hung in there back then. I like hating Alabama when you're good. Yeah. I don't like watching you suck because then you go. Nobody does. It's just poking you with a stick.

We're blaming it on everything. Go, get up. Get up. It's like when the cowboys suck. I know. I want to hate you. Also Cowboys fan. Oh, really?

But when you guys are good, you're so hateable. I had my hymn and Smith jersey on when I was a kid. I was fucking. I'll tell you right now. I loved it. I was a 49ers fan. I bet. I was like, fuck the Cowboys.

And then I hated the Packers. It's weird how you go through like, yeah. Sports will teach you how to. hate people. It will. Pretty easily. It's crazy.

It's like that, but it's like that fucking, I think it's a Bill Burr bit where he's like, just got put on a different t-shirt. Yeah. It's crazy, but we do feel that way. It unites sometimes hating against the same team. The way Eagles fans and 49ers fans can go fuck the Cowboys and everyone's like, yeah, fuck the Cowboys. Dude, I have a joke about a high five is the only thing you can do to a stranger at that

velocity. You just see somebody in the same t-shirt, just hit them as hard as you fucking can. Smack my hand just as hard as I'm going to smack you or. Yeah, it's like you can only do that without. You can't return somebody's keys like that that they drop. One time, but it is, you know, that is interesting about sports hate because like I'm a San Francisco Giants fan and the Dodgers are just on a generational tear with that. I'm a bravest fan, so we hate the Dodgers. And we used to hate you in early 90s.

We also hate the Phillies. We hated you in the early 90s because the NL West. Yeah, of course. NL West was fucked up. It was Braves, Giants, Dodgers, Padres, Rocky. Why were you guys in there? The Braves were in the West for too long. And then you guys shifted.

I forget when you guys shifted. But growing up, the Braves, you guys had everybody. Yeah, I mean. Maddox. When I was a kid, it was like Cowboys, Braves. Because Alabama doesn't have any pro teams. So you pick the nearest ones. We got the Braves.

So then Bulls fan, obviously. Dude, you are the sports fan that I hated the most. That was Bulls, Cowboys, Braves. Or a later version of, of it was Yankees. Brains are the only ones that make sense because they're close to us. Cowboys, I would give you in the early 90s the way that I give 49ers to people in the late 80s. We were such a good team that people in the late 80s were like, I'm a Niners fan.

They're on all the time. Oh, everybody left the Cowboys. As soon as the Saints won a Super Bowl, there's fucking black and gold everywhere in my bill. So that's what it is. Yeah. I'm wondering what the, because you should be Saints fans down there. That's what you should be. And nobody was because the,

the Cowboys were doing so well in the 90s, and I was born in 90. So the Cowboys were everywhere there. As soon as the Saints win, they're like black and gold everywhere. They're making, they're making t-shirts that say, rolled that.

No, you can't do that. Yeah, it's got like a Florida Lee that turns it to an Alabama A. Don't Guy Fieri this fandom. Oh, yeah, they did, dude. Don't put an awesome sauce on something.

Oh, dude. Fucking rolled that t-shirts everywhere. I was like, where did this come from? You know, when I lived in Tucson, what was interesting was watching people do anything but be Cardinals fans. Because the Cardinals fans, because the Cardinals, have always stunk. Yeah.

So they would go like, well, we're close enough to Denver that we could be the, and you're like, you're 16 hours away from Denver. Come on. Or they go,

or cowboys, and you're like, you're fucking 20 hours away from that house. But they would just do anything but be Cardinals fans, which I was always like, imagine being a Cardinals fan. You're like,

no one wants to hang out with us. Yeah, exactly. That's got to suck. It's got to. Yeah, that's why as a 49ers fan, it was good for us to lose

from like 02, to 0 to 2010 because you really saw who was a Niners fan and who wasn't well that's anything it's you just watch people do it with like when when step curry got popular everybody's like dude we're fucking huge i was it golden state fans that's what you are you've been a you've been a golden state fan can i tell you as someone that in 19 i think 1993 my dad and my grandma all all all all bay area all huge warriors giants 49ers i'm giants 49ers and i was like you know what I'm going to be a Nuggets fan. And I remember my dad's family being like,

what? And I was like, yeah, I'm a Denver Nuggets fan. And they were like, okay. And then watching the Warriors go on that run. Yeah. Having my fucking elderly grandmother go like, did you see the Dubs win? And you go,

you see the Dubs win? That's crazy. That's like, and then because the Nuggets were, the Nuggets just didn't. And then when we won the championship, she was so old that she's like, I don't care. And you're like, oh, I need this.

I invested in this for so long, but it is, it's like. That is a big payoff, though. Oh, my God. That championship in 2023, I was like, dude, what the fuck? I never thought the Nuggets were going to win a world championship. Well, no, I mean, that's how I felt ever since 1998. Yeah. Like with the Bulls.

Like, I'm just sitting there like, it'll never fucking happen again. When you win them when you're a kid, 49ers haven't won one since 94. Yeah, dude, just imagine, like, when I was a kid, brave, like we were Braves fans first. Everybody's a Michael Jordan fan in the 90s. Yeah, that is true. We were die hard. We're still diehard Braves fans.

So imagine how I felt when we won in 21. I was like on Cloud 9. I remember being at the steel mill and then being on night shift watching the World Series and then be like, hey, we got to go up top. And I was like, not fucking now. Not fucking now. It's night inning. And then you guys gave everybody to the Dodgers.

You let the Dodgers sign. Well, that's the Braves main thing. They try to have like farm club. They don't want to pay anybody. So as soon as they're amazing, they just let them go. They're like, we want more money and they're like, good. LA will give it to you. Only team worse than you guys are doing that.

It's fucking Boston Red Sox who I live with. And now I've got to watch that. Yeah. Give away generational talents. And dude, I just read today where the guy that's supposed to be our D.A. Jurykson Profar, this is his second year in a row. He's going to be out the whole season for Peds. Oh, yeah, 166, right?

Yeah. I was like two years in a row? 166 games for steroids. Can you see him being like, never catch me this time. You're talking to a Giants fan. Bring up Balco to me. I'll slap you in the mouth.

I don't know what you're talking about. I really do the thing where I do one of the things that I hate the most when someone's wrong, but they will refuse to admit it. That's how I am about Barry Bonds. Where they go steroids, they go, never got caught. Never got caught. Oh, so you're on the side of arguing like that it just didn't happen at all. Yeah, I know, but I'm just saying.

His head shrunk back to a normal size. But he's still the greatest. Dude, he would, if you would have died in that era of baseball, man, like just, I remember, do you remember the McGuire Sosa run? Like I remember being like it was yesterday. Pandemonium. You're buying Pepsi seeing which one you get and shit. I remember being, uh, to this day, I was jealous of McDaniel having the Ken Griffey Jr's. Ken Griffey Jr. like my real the other day and I almost fainted. I told my wife, I was like, this is the coolest fucking thing that has ever happened to me. That is the fucking coolest. He has the sweetest swing. Like he followed.

me and I was like this is this is my whole childhood you understand my wife's like you know women they're like what the what who well I'm lucky I live with her because she's such a sports fan that she she she called baseball for Apple plus for a year and she was calling a game fuck I forget who it was former player he was like sub it in because hunter Pence was out for the game yeah because that's who she worked with and he came in and he was a former met but she said something about ken griffie junior and on air he goes you want a face time junior and she goes, what? They're calling a game and he's, bloop, bloop, bloop.

And then Ken Griffey Jr. picks up the FaceTime. Yeah. It was subjuring. Oh, my God, dude. See, my wife knows. My wife knows football. Like, she's, she's had videos.

I've had videos where I just recorded her during a football game and it go viral. Yeah. And everybody thinks she's faking it. I was like, I fucking wish. I wish. Obviously, a Bama fan. Yes. So it's like.

She actually graduated from there. Oh, that, yeah. Yeah. It's actually her alumni. One of the only times I've ever seen names. Nate Bargettsey's wife angry. And he's nodding right now. Laura Bargetse, who's the best?

Yeah. Laura is, if you want to know why Nate's so funny, it's because Laura's equally as, she's hilarious. Her ball busting is top tier. Nice. Top tier. Joe List, Nate Bargettsey and I were watching the Texas Alabama National Championship. Oh, yeah.

In 2010, Colt McCoy got hurt. Dricking beers at Nate's apartment in Queens and fucking Middle Village. We're drinking beers. You guys are crushing Texas. Colt McCoy's injured. Yeah. Joe List half jokingly goes, all right, come on, Texas, do something.

Make this a game. The stare that Laura gave Joe, I was like, dude, there is no bluffing about this. You're genuinely in trouble. And Joe used to get very anxious when you drink. And he was like, is she fucking mad at me? I was like, very, I was like, she's not even a little mad. She's very, and he was like, I'm really.

And he was like, I'm really. really sorry. I think that moment to this day might have damaged their friendship. That is hilarious. That's how much she loves Bama. Dude, that's my fucking wife. Like she used to, and I used to tell her all the time, we'd be somewhere watching a game and it would start getting close. And she'd be like, let's fucking go. I can't watch this. And I'd be like, we're not going anywhere. Or she'd be at home and she'd turn the TV off if we started losing. I'd like, go in the bedroom. Yeah. I want to see this. I, uh, she's watched me be too much of a sport.

You know, it's happened to both of us, but she watched me be too much of a 49er fan. at a Seahawks game in Seattle with the Niners. And I don't know. I think I might have told the story before, but there was, remember I was telling you about the Sina, AJ thing? So this family's in front of us

and they're super nice or whatever. And the kids in a Russell Wilson jersey, this is the last year, Russell Wilson was a quarterback for the Seahawks. Jimmy Garoppolo was the quarterback for the Niners. And they're beating us. And the kids like turn around talking shit. And I'm like, okay.

All right. A, Z-Y-Y-Z-Uk. And then he keeps going, and he's like, and then we start losing. And I'm like, not right now. And the kid's like, you know, turn around. This is embarrassing to admit. But the kid was like,

ha, he's like going to whatever. And I just matter-of-factly went, well, hey, enjoy, enjoy Russ, because this is his last season with your team. He's hitting the free agent market next year. And Katie went, damn. Like, in a way that I was like, shit, so I'm my bad.

Because you watched it. The kid went like, what? Russell Wilson would never leave the Seahawks. And that was the year he went to the Broncos. Yeah. And I was like, he was like, remember when you couldn't handle your cool

because that fucking eight-year-old got in your head? And remember that you just think about that kid when they announced it. Oh, he went, that fucking man. Yeah. How the fuck did he know? That future terrorist. And you'd probably ask him all this friends.

Like, Russell would never leave, right? Right? Right. Guys, but it was already, maybe, I don't know, man. But I really did feel like, I don't know if you've ever like, Have you ever wrestled with a kid and accidentally heard him? Oh, yeah.

That's what it felt like. Dude, I remember once up. Like my friend's kids where I throw them and they go like hit the couch. I remember one time we were in Montana. I was one of the first years we ever went there. And my uncle's like my little cousin, he's probably six. And I pick up this thing of snow that's like this big. And I throw it at him and it didn't break.

Oh. Oh, dude. And I go lift it. I go lift it up all. Yeah. The inside of it was ice. And I was wondering why I was so heavy when I threw it. I lifted up all of him.

and there's like blood on him under it. Oh, God, damn. And it's one of those things where you're just like, all right, I can think of a lot. Hit me back. Quit crying. That's what you're going to do. Oh, dude.

When you hurt someone unintentionally, the reaction is always the funniest thing. One of my best friends, we both played football. He was necessary. I was unnecessary. I was like a backup linebacker of special teams. He was like the captain starting.

And we were playing some dumb. game in the street like teenagers do. Sure. And I tripped him and he got injured and then I faked my injury too. Like, oh, no, I'm injured too. I'm injured too. So no one's mad at me, right? But that's how when you like do that, you go, oh, no, oh, my wrist.

The kid's bleeding. Yeah. No, I'm fine. And something else, but you don't want yours to be eyes. You're like, here, this is a regular snowball. Hit me with this. I'll pretend it fucking hurt. Accidentally hurting a child.

I went like, oh, do my bad little buddy. Yeah. So for the rest of the game, I was like, you guys are winning. He's like, shut up, dude. You ruined Russell Wilson for me. If she had to been there, you'd have just kept bragging him. Dude, I would have fought his dad.

His dad would have been like, I got to do something about this. I go, all I'm saying is Marshaun Lynch was better with the bills. Kids like, I fucking hate you. Yeah, dude, that is, sports will really make you an asshole. I know. Dude, I tell you, I've started Karen a little less and less, though. I don't know what it is. It's getting older.

Maybe. But then I see people way older than me that care still just as much. I think our passion down there is college football. And I think NIL coming along has been like, God damn it. Why? Because now everyone can get paid. Well, yeah, exactly. You motherfuckers.

You guys were paying them for a while. Did you hear Coach O's quote? No. Coach Ogeron for LSU? Who is the best? They asked him, they're like, what do you think about the NIO and everybody getting paid or whatever? He said,

I'll tell you, man, and you know, he's talking like, he's like, he said instead of bringing the money in the back door and now we just bring it to front. Yeah. Same fucking thing. It's the same thing. It's also funny because now it's like you're seeing schools get good that you're like, oh, they're rich alumni.

We're like, I'll just give money. That's exactly what happens. Go get a corner. Dude, you would think Texas would dominate everything with all this old money. Like you think that they would just be like. They're too busy buying data centers. Yeah. And ruin and everything.

We got to get back to corruption to college football. Exactly. Keep it out of regular people's lives. Yeah. Just have a- Exactly. I want Sam Altman investing in like Stanford. We want our teams to be good.

Yeah. What are you guys doing? They got a corner that rose a 4-1. He was invented in a lab. It's crazy. Justin Stagner's hilarious. Follow him on Instagram, watch his videos.

His stand-up if he's coming to your city. It was awesome meeting you, dude. I'm so glad you came by a hung out. I'm such a fan, so this has been awesome. Yeah, dude. Thanks for hanging. Yeah, awesome. I'm going to go get mad about sports.

Watch the baseball classic.