Soder - 131: Keep it Kosher with Raanan Hershberg | Soder Podcast | EP 129

Episode Date: April 28, 2026

Support the sponsors to support the show!Named #1 by Wirecutter, you can save on the gifts moms love by visiting AuraFrames.com. For a limited time, listeners can get 25 dollars off their best-selling Carver Mat frame with code SODER. That’s A-U-R-A Frames.com promo code SODER.  Support the show by mentioning us at checkout! Terms and conditions apply.AuraFrames.com/soderOur listeners can buy one prescription pair and get 20% off additional pairs at WarbyParker.com/SODER — and using our link helps support the show. #WarbyParker #adhttps://www.warbyparker.com/?&wpsrc=Podcast&singular=59085_2026Q1?utm_campaign=2026Q1&utm_content=audio&utm_medium=podcast&utm_source=soderProtect your family with life insurance from Ethos. Get up to $3 million in coverage in as little as 10 minutes at https://ethos.com/soder Application times may vary. Rates may varyhttps://www.ethos.com/?utm_source=arm&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=soderThe Golden Retriever of Comedy Tour is coming to your city!Get tickets at https://www.dansoder.com/tourMay 15-16 - Omaha,NEJune 1-2 Key West,FLJune 5 - Newark,NJJune 13 - Mill Valley,CA - Special TapingFollow Raanan and watch his new special:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Kc6151SE1Uhttps://www.raananhershberg.com/https://www.instagram.com/raanancomedy/https://www.tiktok.com/@raanancomedyPLEASE Drop us a rating on iTunes and subscribe to the show to help us grow.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/soder/id1716617572Connect with SoderTwitter: https://Twitter.com/dansoderInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dansoderTiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dansodercomedyFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/dansoderYoutube: http://www.youtube.com/@dansoder.comedy#dansoder #standup #comedy #entertainment #podcastProduced by  Mike Lavin     https://www.instagram.com/thehomelesspimp/?hl=en

Hey, everybody. The Colden Retriever of Comedy Tour might be closed, but I'm still on the road. I'm still a stand-up comedian. We're taping the special in June. I got a couple shows that I'm going to be running through to, you know, get it nice and nice in there, nice and right where we want it. So come check me out. First, I'm going to be at the Omaha Funny Bone, May 15th and 16th. Got four shows bringing Brendan Sagalow. That's going to be a blast. May 6th, I'm going to be at the Avalon Theater. for Netflix as a joke. We're doing a movie watch along. We're watching a very fun J-Lo movie. It's already been approved. My guest is a very cool guest. It's Tim Dillon. May 6th, Avalon Theater, Dansorder.com.

May 15th and 16th, I'm going to be at the Funny Bone in Omaha, Nebraska. Four shows to really finish Titan in that hour before we film it in June. I got Sagalow coming with me. Four shows, Omaha Funny Bone, May 15th and 16th, and then New Jersey Performing Arts Center, I'm going to be there June 5th.

Friday, June 5th, it's the last time I'm running this hour before I tape it. Go get tickets at DanSoter.com. I'm very excited about that. Also, a little surprise shows in June. June 1st and 2nd, if you live in Key West, Florida, go buy tickets because I'm coming down to Key West.

On Monday, Tuesday, it's random, but it'll be fun as hell. Dan Soder.com. I'm going to make sure those are up on Dan Soter.com, too. Just go Dan Soter.com for the league. See you at Netflix is a joke. I'll see you at Omaha and I'll see you in New Jersey. I like junkyarding jokes.

Because when you junkyard a joke, you can take a line from a bit that worked, but the bit didn't work. Yeah. But the line worked. And then you take it out and you put it in another joke that works and you go like, it's like a spark plug. It's all a junkyard. Every hour is just like a couple survivors of a platoon strung together.

Yeah. You know what's funny is the illusion that this is what you always intended to be. Yeah. Even though there's so much like things that didn't work. You have no idea how patched together this is. That's the illusion, right? It's like it doesn't look at. Well, the illusion is we're, I'm just talking.

Yeah. We're just having a conversation. Yeah. Like I was saying that about Ali Sadiq. That's like one of my favorite things about him. He's like a guy where you go, those jokes look. He's got that black hypnotism. Yeah.

It's just, you know what it is? that's just like, I've seen white dudes that have it too. White dudes, Janice has that. Yonis has that. He's doing bits, but you're like,

are you on, by the way? Yeah, we've been on. We've been on. Okay. All right, no,

cool. I just, I forget the, yeah, the old mayor and it's like recording, you know? Yeah.

I feel like they're not doing that as much anymore. Which is rolling. Yeah. I, here's the deal. I don't have a premise for my podcast. Yeah. And I also,

why I like doing this show is because I get to hang out with comics that I like. And then I just hope the people that like me like them. Yeah. That's all this is. It's just a way to see people. That's all this is. Yeah, it really is.

It is like a play date. I love doing podcasts. It's a podcast playday. I love doing podcasts where they try to explain to you the premise, but it's just every podcast. But they try to set up like, so with this, you can just, we'll just talk and you can just take it wherever you want. Just, just, you know, it's just a conversation.

Just go wherever. And you go, that's a podcast. That's a podcast. That's not a theme. Oh, we just want to make it like a hang. And just like if there's a joke and you want to like commit to that joke, just do that. And if you want to riff. That was like morning radio.

Bob and Tom used to do that where they'd go, bring in five of your bits and we'll lead you into it. And you go, I'm just funny. Yeah, yeah. We can just be funny. You know, we can just hang out and I'll be funny. But there are some funny comics who aren't funny. Yeah. You know what I mean?

I would, I would say it is 70, 30. 70 like funny. 70% of comics are actually. funny and 30% of them are like mathematicians. Mathematic, yeah, yeah, yeah. And they just were like autism. Yeah, but and they're like very serious. But I mean, you can be a great comedian.

I started interview with Woody Allen where he's like, people meet me and, and they think I'm funny, but I'm actually miserable. Yeah, yeah. You know what's funny, man? It's like, um, I've seen Woody Allen movies. I understand people think he's a genius. Yeah. I don't get.

I've never, I've never been a big fan. And I don't. That's definitely okay to say now. Well, no, that's what I tell you something. Back in the day, I would have shamed you, but I can't do that anymore. Back in the day, I'd be like,

you don't know comedy. Can I tell you what? It's like, I feel like a drunk that got through a car accident. I went, I'm okay. I'm okay. Back in the day, I would have been like, you don't know comedy,

you're anti-Semitic. You don't need. And now I've got to be like, me neither. Yeah. You go, what a monster. What a, but my thing is, is it just missed me. Yeah, yeah. Like Zeppelin.

Yeah. I got into my 30s. I listened to the, or my late 20s, my early 30s, I listened to Zeppelin. And I was like, I was really good. Like Woody Allen, I listened to a standup, very funny. Stand up's very funny. It's incredible. Yeah.

I'm a Mel Brooks guy. I grew up with Mel Brooks. Yeah, yeah. My sense of humor is based on Mel Brooks is like that. When I just watched the Judd Apatow documentary. Yeah. I was like, it was, I was like, I was like, hooting and hollering at the TV because it got me so excited.

The thing about Mel Brooks, I love Mel Brooks too, and there's a great interviewer with Mel Brooks Brooks where they ask him if he's friends with Woody Allen and he goes, no, nobody's friends with that guy. See, that's what I mean. Like the fact that everything I watch about Mel Brooks, I go, I feel like, I feel, there's a part of me that goes, oh, I'm disingenuous. A lot of my personality is just Mel Brooks. Well, he is also just, I, in my heart, I relate more to Woody Allen as a, like,

he got you i'm actually got into comedy because of whatie allen okay and i got into comedy because of mel brooks right but mel brooks is also someone like i would so much rather be that person sure he's such a better person i always liked his comedy because there was and they say this in the documentary and finally like they put words to it uh it's based on love yes and it's like there's a lot of collaborative it's just very loving yeah it's like he talks shit about people and he makes fun of people But you know the base level is like, I really always enjoyed the warmth of Mel Brooks. Oh, yeah.

And there's joy and fun and, yeah. And also when I read Richard Pryor's autobiography and he talked about writing that. And how he wrote for, what's it called the big? Blazing Saddles. But he wrote specifically on Blazing Saddles for that he loved writing for the manga. Yeah, manga.

He's the one who wrote, yeah, manga's pawn. He wrote that line. You think he's writing like the line for the show. All the N-word stuff. And it's like, no. But that was, you know, that was Mel Brooks. In the documentary, yeah. In the documentary, they even, Mel said that.

He goes, Richard was very enamored with Mongo. I think he connected to the sadness. Because Richard Pryor, there's such a sadness was saying, you know? I mean, you read that biography and you're like, this guy had the worst child that I've ever heard in my life. His first memory of making people laugh is slipping in shit in his front yard and he just did it again because they laughed. Yeah.

Oh, it's so. So you go, oh, there's the hard wiring. There is. Well, it's in his act, too. I mean, there was, he walked in on his mom blowing a local politician. His mom was a whore. His grandma ran a whorehouse.

Yeah, I know that. Yeah. And his dad was like, you know, like fucked her. Like, but it wasn't like. He should have been like, well, you lost my votes, sir. Yeah. I won't vote for you, sir. No, but prior was like the absolute,

to me, example of the alchemy of like turning absolute shit into funny stuff. Oh, yeah. Because he was just so funny. It's the best community of all time. in my opinion. The only reason I would put Chappelle above them is because Chappelle has had more hours of proof.

I think Richard Pryor show and Chappelle show are even. I think live in concert, 1978, and killing them softly are even. Now, I think live in concert to me is bad. I mean, obviously killing himselfly is great. I don't know, man. But Liven himself starts and doesn't stop. It's true.

They're both like two. They're both like top five. Live in concert has moments where he dials it in and you go, this is the greatest thing. The story of his dad, having a heart attack, and fucking at the same time is like one of my favorite bits of all. It's also like, um, can I really quickly docially promote my special? Sorry.

Yeah, I mean, we're going to put the link in here. Oh, okay, all right. Well, never mind. Now I feel like an asshole. No, if you, go watch Ron On special. Morbidly Jewish. Morbidly Jewish. If you can't tell he's Jewish, she is Jewish.

She's morbidly Jewish. Sorry, sorry. But no, dude, the whole, yeah, the link to me bar. Okay, yeah, I just always get it. I get it. Yeah. I don't do intro. I go on like, you know, some radio show to promote my special,

and then I'm just talking about dildos and fucking. At the end, I'm like, I never brought it up. There's no need, yeah, well, absolutely. And I'll do it at the end too. I'll really make sure if they stay to the end, I'm really going to promo the fuck out of your special. But, yeah, I mean, live in concert, when you watch it, you're like, I don't even know.

It, like, transcends stand-up. It's like a one-man show in a way. It's like, some of it's just, like, pure physicality. It's wild. Comes out with the light still on. surprises everyone, which everyone thought Louis did first. Yeah, yeah. But you're like, no, that's a Richard Pryor move.

Number two. Everyone thought Louis did first. That should be the name of like our era. Writing an hour once a year. George Carlin never did that. Did Carlin do it once a year? I'm pretty sure. Because I know that's some British shit.

That's like Edinburgh. They do it once a year and have a fucking theme. Yeah. And they have it all connect, which is crazy. Yeah. Maybe work on it two years. Yeah. It's always my advice.

Bill Burr formula, yeah. But Burr had a great quote where he said it should be at least two to three years because you're a different person. You like grow enough in three years that you're a different person. It's true. But I guess I've been doing once a year, but really? I got nothing else going on. But like, well, that's not true because you write shit and you do a lot of other stuff.

But what you do once a year? You have an hour? A little, a year and a chain. I'm the first person to do that. By the way. Run on. at first. Oh yeah, Carlin did 10. I know he did 10 HBO specials, well, he did 14. Oh, some of these must be album. Oh, these are HBO specials. He did 14 HBO specials.

Yeah, I think it was once a year, I think. Maybe that, yeah. The life is worth losing one is the, the second's last one. The ones where he starts rhyming, you're like, maybe it's time to retire. Yeah. The one of when he comes out of Dr. Suits. Did you watch that documentary about him? I did it. I'm going to tell you right now, all you need to watch as a comedian is the last 15 minutes of the first episode.

Really? There's two episodes and the whole first episode is about his early life growing up in Harlem him being in the armed services, him kind of finding his way, he starts doing comedy, he's silly, and then it goes through his first big push

of hippie-dippy weatherman and all the fucking things. And then it gets to the 70s and it ends with everyone's shitting on them for rhyming. And they're like, they show SEC TV make fun of them. Oh, really? Where he's like, he's like, I've ordered green beans.

Why can't they be red beans? Oh, but that's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Never see blue and blue blue blue blue. Why is blueberries blue? Yeah, yeah. Blue bear and it's Rick Moranis doing a really funny impression of bearded. No, I don't want. Eggs and ham.

No, I don't want. It's exactly it. And then it shows, uh, it's Cheech and Chong are talking about it. And Cheech has a quote where he goes, man, fuck George Carlin. No one gives a fuck about him. And they start. I'll give credit to Apatow on this. The way he directed it is great

because it starts doing that thing where it shows a criticism, shows another one, and then starts doing that thing where it goes fast where it's like, you see all the criticisms. And then it cuts to George Carlin's notebook.

And he's like, I'm going to prove all of them wrong. Like, I'm going to show them what's up. And it's like a ramp up. Yeah. And it shows Bill Burr. And he's like interviewing Bill Bert. He's like,

yeah, me and my friends went to go see him at the 80s and we thought we were going to go watch a washed up dude. We were like going to make. fun of him. Wow. And then he comes out and he's a fucking howitzer. Just like,

dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. And it's like, dude, that part. It's like the anger from getting attacked. Yeah. It made him too angry to rhyme anymore.

Yeah, he was like, I don't care if the words connect. But I watched that in a hotel room and I was ready to run through a wall. That's amazing. I watched it like after a Thursday night show at a club and I was like, it's fucking incredible. Well,

people always like, people become legend and then you think their whole career was like just on me up. Perfect. And it's just not true. There's so many moments where people are like, he's done. Yeah. So many moments where people are like, Stephen Spielberg's done. Yeah.

Or like whatever, you know what I mean? The Spielberg thing, when he did Schindler's List, everyone was like, what the fuck are you doing? You make feel good movies. Yeah, exactly. And he's like, well, I'm a Jew and I want to make a movie about the Holocaust. And they're like, all right, fine. But they were also like, I don't think people are going to like it. Yeah.

It's like one of the greatest movies of all time. And it's just like an incredible movie. And there is. There's like a lot of. Everything. Every rider, Hemingway. Like was it drug washed out at times it's like it's like but then you look back you're like oh they were lugging the whole time, you know Well that was my thing with a you know

Kind of a hacky thing but I really liked Hunter S. Thompson when I got to college What's that I liked his writing? Why is that he hacky? Because it was hacky because the other people that liked Hunter S Thompson liked because he was a drug addict Oh no no they like this drug addict kept him from being a that's what sucks is that in like Douglas Brinkley he used to run his like Yeah, he like I think is like the executive of his literary estate or something. I used to be super into Hunter S. Thompson's writing. It's great. From my hometown.

Yeah, Louisville, Kentucky. And Cash's Clay. Yep. I think Fear and Losing, in Los Vegas is like one of the top five funniest books of all time. And he has a lot of other great books. I would say his best book is Fear and Loathing on the campaign trial in 1972. Where he has an acid flashback during, he's like writing about, he's like on the plane and

journal him for the president. He's like, oh, shit. What are my ass in flashbacks? I think that's the best book about modern American politics. I did love that book. It's fucking phenomenal. And if you read it around an election cycle, it holds up in a very spooky way.

Yeah. Because he says basically like, if you want to get elected in this country, you've got to bash the other guy and be unethical and be unethical. Yeah. Because there was the other guy who got, who was like actually a really good politician when they found out he had mental.

It was McGovern's first pick for vice president. Yeah, yeah. He was, I think, the governor of South. Dakota and it had been proven that he had been institutionalized and that ruined him. And that ruined him. And he was like legitimately good, like a legitimately good. Yeah.

He had like, he had the, he was aligned with McGovern on a lot of his policies and they were running it. But the thing about Hunter S. Thompson is he starts doing cocaine in the 80s. Yeah. And his writing goes to shit. I know. The drug thing, it's the opposite of what people think.

Yeah. They go, he would hurt him quite a bit. He was fucked up on drugs. And you're like, no, man, this is a guy that when he was a kid would read on his typewriter. Type Out Hemingway, yeah, the whole book. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're like, that's a guy.

I fucking, I've always loved, like, there's just something about his sentences when I read them, I just get excited. There's just something so cool. Yeah. The way he writes, I don't know, it's hard to explain, but it's just like. I would say for anybody that hasn't read,

that if you don't want to read Fear and Loathing, Las Vegas, or on the campaign trail, Hell's Angels is great, but I would say look up the book, Generation of Swine, because it's, he's on cocaine in some of it, but it's he still got his fastball. So he's like writing a lot of stuff.

He writes about Reagan a lot in it. And you're like, ooh, this guy nailed it. I think I've read that one. It's great. It's right behind you. It's the yellow back one.

I don't know why, but I just love the way he uses the, umbersand, you know? He smashes an ampersand. He really just, he fucking loves it. I just love it.

Every time he had it, I'm like, it's so cool. But I also feel like, he's like A and D is for fucking squares. Yeah. Yeah. He's like,

why would I use a fucking Aand? Like a bitch. Well, his thing was always he said F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote the perfect book in The Great Gatsby because it's so concise and it's so short. Yeah. So he was like struggling to get Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas down to the shortest he could. Oh, wanted it to be as concise as the Great Gatsby.

Wow. Yeah. No, I mean, it's a fucking amazing book. It's so funny. But then when Hunter S. Thompson's talks about, they're like, you know, he had a suitcase full of drugs. And it's like, yeah, yeah. You should also look into more how fascinating the character, the person, Oscar,

Acosta was. Oh, the lawyer? Who was the lawyer? Yeah, yeah. He was a Chicano lawyer from L.A.

that was like, in these streets. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, he was in these streets, like the street gangs, the Latin street gangs were, like, down with him.

He was a lawyer. He'd get these guys out of jail and shit. I just remember, yeah. And he was scary. He was scary. Yeah. He was like,

he called him the big brown Buffalo. Yeah. He was like, fucking scary dude. I just remember there's one line that I've always loved in it where they go to, like, some kind of police.

And he's like, That was, that was, in Las Vegas. And he's like, we felt like, we have the, like, drug, like, the junkies or whatever should have a voice in this meeting or something. I forget the line, but it was so, it's such a great line. Yeah, that was this, because the first part of Fear and Loading in Las Vegas was him going to cover the Mint motorcycle race, like the 400 for Sports Illustrate. Right, right.

They hired him, and then it just became a disaster. Yeah, yeah. Because he went to Vegas and did a bunch of drugs. And then when he sent it into Yon Wunner at Rolling Stone, Yon Wanner was like, this is unbelievable. Yeah. And he would just, like, fax him. You would just fax them.

It feels like notes. Like it's concise, but it feels like you're reading notes. And there's such a, it's just very present. Yeah. Like it just feels so real. Yeah.

And it's, it is one of the funniest books of all time because it is both really funny, but also just like you know it's happening. Yeah. And he's not being, guys, Mother's Day is on the way.

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Guess what? Unlimited storage. You can personalize your gift, and they have a gift box, a gift box, which includes packaged in a premium gift box with no price tag. So when they get it, they're not like, oh, this is what you think of your mother on Mother's Day. It's named number one by a wirecutter, and you can save on gifts, moms love, by visitingoraframes.com. For a limited time, listeners can get $25 off their best-selling Carver mat frame with code soda. That's A-U-R-A-Fra-Fra-Framed. frames.com promo code soda. A-U-R-A-Frames.com promo code soda. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout in terms of conditions apply. Warby Parker is so nice and cool. Back in the day before I got my LASIC surgery, which, by the way, I will be returning to glasses. I understand that.

When you get glasses, you're like, where the hell do I go? Where do I get caught up? I'm telling you, man, these are one of those things where this is a sponsor now, but it's a sponsor because I actually used it. When I used to wear glasses, I would go to Warby Parker. They have, first off, checkups in the store, and then you just go to the front of the store and you can pick up, you can pick the frames

that your new glasses are going to be. So it's everything you need right there, including also if you want contacts. But like I said, eye exams, sunglasses that are prescription, huge, all in one place, which makes everything a lot easier. Maybe the best part of Warby Parker, for every pair they sell, they also give a pair to someone in need. That's kind of nice.

With all the greed that's going on in the world, it's like, hey, thank you for giving someone that can't see free glasses. Probably a big gift. Right now, buy one prescription pair. There we go. And get 20% off any additional prescription pairs. They really are like, hey, say prescription. We know you kind of have a tough one. But it's true.

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that I think got misconstrued to younger generations. He's not being an asshole to be an asshole. No. He's being himself and almost wedging himself into places and going, this is just who I am. Yeah. So I'm going to do weird shit. to you, but he wasn't going out of his way to, like, attack people.

No, no, no, no. He was just fucking with him if they came into his proxy. Yeah. If he just came around him. And he, I mean, it's making fun of himself. He's kind of like a clown quite a bit. Well, he's like, I'm an idiot. You know, I ate all my canalo.

Yeah. Or grapefruit. Yeah. And if, I mean, if you go read his first gonzo, I mean, Hell's Angels could be argued as his first gonzo experience. Well, the thing about the Kentucky Derby. That's the first thing. That's the first one.

Yeah. Yeah. Which was where he discovered his style, basically. Well, and the first time. he worked with Ralph Stedman. Yeah, yeah. And Ralph Stedman came out. And he's just a British guy that's like,

what in the fuck is this? And he's like talking about it. And you know, because you're from Louisville, he's like, oh, everyone thinks the Kentucky Derby's this high society thing. And he's like, bunch of animals. A bunch of animals. That's what you wanted to show.

And the way that Ralph drew it, forget if it was for Harper's Bazaar, forget which magazine it was for that he wrote that. But you see the original illustrations. Yeah. He nails it. He nails what I like about Ralph. Stedman is he nails the the monstrosity of very wealthy people yes he really nails the like oh he's

incredible he reminds me like you see like wymar art like german art like where it's so grotesque yes and just like all the decadence and people's faces yeah he's just he's what ralstedman yeah he's one of my all-time favorite and if you watch that documentary and hearing him talk about like meeting hunter and like yeah because hunter has thompson just wanted to shoot guns he's a big gun guy yeah and they brought it up there's a New York Times article that just came out about was his suicide. Like, you know, I read the article, I got sent it because my friends know I'm really in the Hunter S. Thompson. And my friend Vic and my friend Jason sent it to me. And they were like, have you read this?

And I read it. And I stopped midway through because I was like, you can't trust any piece of media now. Well, what was it saying? I don't know. It was basically saying that his wife, his second wife, Anita didn't really trust that it was suicide. but his son was going like, I didn't know himself. Of course.

And also, he loves Hemingway. And also, agreed. It's really rip it off. He also talked about it. It's an homage to Hemingway. He talked about it a lot.

The reason I, the reason I put down the article and was not interested in it, it was because of his suicide letter. That was the most Hunter S. Thompson thing. Of course. This is going to hurt or something?

No, football season is over. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And no more pain. No more. No more pain. Yeah.

Because he said that that was the most, that was when. after the Super Bowl was when he was always the most depressed. Yeah. Because he didn't have football because he loved football. And what I loved about Hunter N. Thompson was, he was a 49ers fan because of his time in San Francisco. Oh.

And then he liked the Denver Broncos because of his time in Aspen at Woodh Creek. Oh, nice. And he was a gambler, but in a real way. Yeah, yeah. He wasn't an app gambler. Yeah, yeah. He was a, I'm going to put money down. I need the rush.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I need the fucking, I need skin on the game. That kind of shit, which I respect. He definitely. Themself, yeah. Because it's like, it's like, but I started reading it and they were like, talk about his ex-wife trying to get this weed strain approved.

And like how she still lives in Woody Creek and she'll rent it out to Airbnb. And I was kind of like. What do they try me like a, what do you mean like a weed conspiracy? No, they're trying. It just sounded like she was trying to drum up business. Oh, yeah, yeah. To sell stuff on it with his name on it.

Yeah, yeah. Which is like, when his son is like, dude, my dad killed himself. Why do they? They always have like conspiracies about people where it makes 100%. Like Kurt Cobain? They're like, maybe it wasn't. It's like every song's like a suicide. He's like, I'm going to kill myself.

I'm going to do it with the shotgun. Oh man, I think it was, I think it was Courtney or what I love. The only time sue conspiracies I think are right, and this is because of Big J on the bonfire, he thinks the hacking yourself on a doorknob is autoerotic affixiation, and they fucking. fuck up. You think that's what a 16 was doing in prison?

No, I think he was murdered by the government. I think he was killed. I could go either way on that, which is the most, the most I've gone to a conspiracy theory because I'm very against him usually. You think he might have been choking? No, no, no, no.

I think he could have committed. I'll tell you right now. He definitely wasn't happy in that situation. No. He also had a lot of information. He did have a lot of information. That's the point where you go. It really can go both ways.

I could see him getting murdered, though I don't believe, I just don't believe, anyone has the competence to do it and get away with it. I certainly don't believe Trump can do it and not like talk about it in a tweet. Oh, he would bring it up in a way for as a brag. You'd be like, what? I just put on true social.

I didn't know it'd go out. He'd be leaning against the frame of Air Force One and he go, well, I killed you ever Epstein. You didn't care about that? He like, you can't say that. He, uh, Epstein would, to me, would make sense that he gave himself because of the loss of power because a guy, yeah, that guy like that, That's all of his shit is like control.

I would tell myself if I was in his situation then. Like, I don't know, man, because I like the idea of just blowing people's shit up. I'm just being like, I'm gonna rock your shit. But if you're like a narcissist and the whole world hates you and you're about to have like judgment. Yeah. Like suicide is definitely an option of that. Oh, 100%. I mean, that's the thing.

I just think like, I feel like, but murder, it could possibly be. I still think even that, I still think like it's probably suicide. I guess I just think incompetence really destroys most conspiracy theories. Yeah. You know, and so it's just- 9-11 being an inside job. There's no way that it would have not leaked.

You can't complete a full sentence, but he can complete 9-11. The only way I can see it being, the only reason I can see conspiracy theories working is if they, like, don't tell Bush. If it's like one of those things, like what they've been doing with like alien technology. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Where they go. Implausible deniability. People don't even know. Yeah, yeah. Like how the government has parts of the government that the government doesn't even know about. But you know how it goes like we control all the technology that foreign alien, you know. Yeah, because Trump would bring it up. I guess maybe they're hit it.

So to Clinton. Yeah. So they're all narcissists. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. To be a president, you have to fucking love yourself. But my issue is conspiracy theories is that eventually you try to get there and you can't make it sense all the way. So you throw in Jews at the end to finish it off, you know? It's like the glue that holds together conspiracy theories.

Yeah, you guys. are um you guys really are like the slapstick yeah for you know like yeah where the uh the cement or you know he puts it on and goes stop fleak you just choose yeah it's like yeah it holds it all together because you're like well what about this is it we're like well that doesn't make sense to jews so you're like ah i see in a world where i'm undereducated and uh not into comedy where i believe that a lot a lot more. For sure. Because it always blew my mind when I was younger that I didn't see a lot of Jewish

families with drinking problems. That was one of the first conspiracy theory that I noticed. We get tired when we drink. You guys did this thing. All my parents, all my mom's friends that were Jewish would do this thing where they would have two drinks and go, well,

that's enough. It's very accurate. And all the other goys that we knew were just fucking palming it. I think that's where anti-semitism started. You see Jews. have self-control and you're like I fucking hate you all that's what I mean and the self-control you're doing with money you have self-control explain the banks yeah don't explain the fucking thing with the go you not you think you're better than me because you

don't get drunk and lose all your money fuck you you you juice you guys took down the towers there's truth to that I know I believe there is a sense of uh responsibility like yeah if you think about it with money you go well I'm gonna save a little yeah yeah yeah you go why you saving it blow it all yeah yeah the goy is just like thrown the money away yeah Because the thing that I talked to Louis Katz about that we laughed about is I always said, my friends that were Jewish were always very horny. Oh, yeah. And I said, why are you so horny?

And Louis, Louie Katz is one of my favorite human beings on Earth. Yeah, yeah. Because he has this, number one, he's a hilarious comic, great human being. But he has this thing where he isn't a yes man. Yeah. Where if you say something to him and he doesn't agree with it, he goes, he pushes back. He goes, I don't think that's. You mean honest?

Yes. Yes, he's honest. I've been talking shit about people. We've been having dinner and I've been talking shit about people and he goes, I don't think that's true. And it'll stop me and go like, yeah, maybe I'm fucking, I have personal feelings. I don't want to chew my own horn, but I feel like I kind of am similar and have people not like me because of that.

Even if someone says a movie they like like that I like, even that'll bring up. That's where I tell you, I go, all right, right. But I choose, I choose honesty. You're getting a real conspiracy theory on this. I choose honesty over people. liking me. I admire that. I admire that in a way that as a people pleaser. I admire that quality as much as I do people that go to the gym consistently. Yeah. I don't know how the fuck you do that. Yeah. I did it for a little bit and it's very hard. Yeah. It's very hard. But I asked him,

I was like, why are all my Jewish friends horny? And he goes, because we don't have shame attached to sex like you guys do. And I was like, very true. When he said that, very true, we're at the sacramental punchline. Yeah. And it was like a light bulb went off in my head. And I was like, that makes so much sense. Because with,

with original sin and Christianity, you're guilty with your thoughts. Yes. And Judaism, you're not guilty with your thoughts. And Judaism, it's actually about the deeds. Sure.

And to the point where you don't even have to have faith, you just do the deeds and the faith can come later. Yeah. So we don't have this, like, we don't have this shame. Yeah, I don't have it.

I really don't. It really is insane to me because I've always had I've had every nut in my life has had Shane attached to it. In some way. Now are you Catholic? No, but my mom was.

Okay, yeah, yeah. I was raised Episcopalian, which is English Catholic. Yeah, yeah. Which if you don't know, was only created so that the King of England could get divorced. Yeah, yeah. That's truly funny. The only reason why he did it was like,

yeah, I gotta get rid of this bitch. Just a religion over getting rid of a bitch. Yeah. And I've always, my friends that are religious, I know a lot of Catholics. I have very good friends that are Catholic. I respect their faith. If you're Catholic, I totally agree with it.

I don't believe in organized religion. Yeah, yeah. At all. It doesn't make sense to me. Organize religion, yeah. It just feels like a store you're going to buy. It's like going to a store instead of farming. Well, yeah, yeah.

It's like you're telling me if I can only buy lettuce from Fairway. Yeah, yeah. And that's the true lettuce. It's kind of like religion's kind of like a bunch of schizophrenics having an agreed upon delusion. Yes. Like, well, most schizophrenetics was just a loan. and they just have their vision.

It's like schizophrenics working together. It's unity and schizophrenia. And then they go, this is right. And you're like, but that was written by a man. Yeah, yeah. Because that was the questions I had. My mom was excommunicated from the church because she got divorced early.

Oh, wow. Which is the whole point of the thing was for the divorce. Well, this is, she was Catholic. Oh, Catholic. She was Irish Catholic. Actually, then that makes sense. Yeah, it makes sense. Hold on.

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It really is a mood shift. We were just in the middle of talking about religion. I was watching a movie and someone texted me that Robin Williams died in the middle of the movie. I mean, they didn't know I was watching it, but I'm like, damn, I really shouldn't have looked at my phone. I was going to Coney Island to ride the roller coaster. Really?

My friend Joey Owens texted me and he was like, Ronald Williams killed himself. I was like, what's up? I was about to get on a roller coaster. Do you know how weird that is? To be sad on a roller coaster? And they're like, watch your moms and legs. And I go, even at the end, Robin Williams stealing from Richard Jenny.

Oh, Richard Jenny, you're going with a gun, though. That fucking, what a way he went out. Don't fat check my joke. Right away, Richard, what's his name? Richie Redding? Yeah. He's marrying a Jew. I was on stage.

I'm like, the Jew on the show last night. He goes up before me. He pulls a full Tim Watley. He talks about he's marrying a Jew. All Jew jokes the whole time. This is what we were talking about yesterday. All Jew jokes. The Tim Watley thing.

Holocaust jokes. They were good, they were good, too. He was like, my wife the other day, she was like, yeah, we have a Jew in the oven. I'm like, you're not supposed to say that because she's pregnant. Yeah. I fucked up that joke. But she's pregnant, whatever.

I really fucked that. That's so funny. Can you edit that so I say she's pregnant? Watch Mike's editing skills. He's doing Jewish jokes, Holocaust jokes, and I'm like the Jew on the show. You go, that's my stuff. I'm like, what the fuck? We were talking about Tim Walty where Katie said that.

Does it defend you as a Jewish person? No, it defends me as a comedian. His opening thing, and it was very funny. He's very funny. Ritchie Redding's the man. He's so funny. He's been on the podcast. I love Richie a long time.

I am joking. But like, uh, he used to open for Kat Williams. Oh, did he? Like, not a little. I guess now he can do black jokes to be open for Cal Williams. You see him once. He's like,

I'm in telling these motherfuckers. These Jews are out here. He's doing cat doing Jewish material. His opening joke is, I can't believe I'm Jewish, bitch. It's all right. I don't, okay. His opening joke was like, uh, he was like, uh, yeah, we're raising the kid Jewish because I do not have the energy in

argue with a pregnant Jewish woman. That's great. If there's anyone you can't want to argue with, it's a pregnant Jewish woman. I'm like, what the fuck? That's a good joke. It's a good joke. Yeah.

And then I had to go up. I'm like, frankly, I'm married to Catholic so I can just do Catholic jokes because that's now how it fucking works now. Is your wife Catholic? She was raised Catholic. Yeah. Do you see the, it's weird about Catholics is because they,

they still, even if they're not Catholic anymore, they still, it's in there. Yeah, yeah. It's in there until the day. they die. My mom is still like Easter is fucking huge. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, hell's not something you really, uh, you know, it's, you learn that at a young age. It's hard to. This is the same thing

about the sexual shame. Jews don't have hell. We don't have hell. Yeah, I mean, it really is like, you go, if you were to put monotheistic religions out there, as far as the one I'd go, talk to me about the one without hell. Yeah. Yeah. Now, hell is, you can't mix your dairy and your meat. I go, wow, now we're fucked up. Hey, I'd choose not believing hell over at Cheeseburger. Well, I didn't know what, I didn't know what kosher was. And my first job ever was at my friend Adams' parents owned a kosher bagelery in Denver. And I was 13 and they're like, yeah, you can work here.

You just work in the back with like the dough and stuff and bringing in. And then I got a lunch break. And it was my first lunch break at my first job ever. And I walked across the parking lot to Burger King and got a double whopper with cheese. and I was about to walk in and one of the guys that worked there went, what's in that bag? Oh shit. A double offer with cheese and he went,

this is a fucking kosher. I was outside. I was like about in the back. Yeah, and he goes, can't bring that in here. He goes, do you bring that in here?

We got to get a rabbi with a flame thrower. Seriously, a flame thrower to fucking bless all the ovens. And I was like, that can I just want to see that. I almost brought the cheeseburger in to be like, you know, go get your boy.

I want to fucking tell him to fire up the flame thrower. You know why you can't have a, milk and meat? Why? Honestly, it's because it's perverse, which kind of makes sense. Cooking an animal in the milk in its mother's milk,

that's what says in the bike. It's fucked up that we do that. You're killing a cow and then eating it with the milk of that cow's mother. That is wild. That is wild that it was a Jewish person that went, a little fucked up, I don't know. You guys think this is a little fucked up?

And they go, yeah. It really is. That really is what it's about. They're like, it's like you shouldn't, don't cook meat and it's mother's. milk. They're just kind of like, kind of perverse.

I took a theology class in like my freshman year or college or whatever and they were talking about how a lot of these beliefs in religion were because they were like, people were getting sick. Yeah. They had to write like Muslims, you know,

it was the last monotheistic religion to be made. Yeah, yeah. And they were like, um, the pork thing was probably because people were getting sick eating pork. Yeah, so they were like no pork. Yeah,

no alcohol. Yeah, it was like making people have a problem. It was all just, yeah, it was just, yeah, I guess health issues. It was like the COVID vaccine. Exactly. They're like, we're just putting this in and they're like, no pork. And then it just held for thousands of years.

Suddenly Christianity came about. Well, I think it goes Judaism, Christianity, Muslims. Oh, Muslims last, yeah. It's funny because it feels first, does it? Well, Muslims, the thing that they don't get credit for is they acknowledge other messiah. Yeah, Jesus and Moses are both prophets. Both prophets in the Muslim religion where you go, oh, shit. It's kind of funny.

You're like, they really collide. They really bring everyone together. They were trying to hit. Until they don't. Until they go, everyone must die. It sounds on the surface.

Very, uh, it is weird because you go, well, why are you guys trying to kill all the infidels if you're also acknowledging the infidels main guys? Yeah. You know,

it's, uh, that's what I was, what's interesting to me is like, um, I respect people that are religious because I go, well, you have,

you can commit. Yeah. It's a commitment in a way. That's what I'm saying. Like, my friends that are Catholic, I know they go to a church on Wednesday and Sunday, and I'm like, it's just like, I mean, the reason I don't, I want to, I'm just boring. It was always boring. It's just so boring. I used to have to go with my mom and it was,

I'm basically choosing, oh, I'd rather not have meaning in my life to just not be bored. Were your parents, did they drive, did they want you to be like? Yeah, I kept kosher until college. Really? Yeah. What was the first non-cocious? What did you break with? I've, I've talked about it before, but it's, uh, it's, uh, it's, uh, um, So I had chicken, which is just uncocha if it's not prepared, right? You know? Because meat with kosher has to be cut with a Shechita knife.

It's this knife that's really sharp. So the animal's supposed to die painlessly, even though... Damn, you guys really do think about the animals. We do. But the problem, and this is kind of the problem of religion, is that now that is not the most humane way to kill an animal. Sure. Now it's like some machine that crushes their heads.

Yeah, just Chbrivedem it, right? But we still are doing what was human beings. Maine like Flip it I'm going to I'm going to flip it if I worked at a

slaughterhouse that's all I would do Be so funny If it's just a dress like that It's so funny If it's a Like when he does

That scene The guy's like Are you just doing Two-Face For Batman? He goes Oh brother I read the

I read the pulp Comics This is just Two-Face It just feels like Cort McCarthy just didn't know about two-face

Yeah It's so like When a comic's doing a bit That he doesn't know another comic has the bit He goes

Do you know that guy does that bit He goes, son. He's like, I got a new villain. He gives riddles out. Yeah. He goes, ah, Cormax. I hate that. His 16-year-old lover goes, you don't read Batman, do you?

Son or bed. Chop her god. I love the character from No Country, but that is very much a two-faced thing. Flip it, and he's like, you don't read, big Batman fan? That's all that guy had to say. I said, no, but yeah. You a big Batman fan, son?

But so, yeah, so, yeah, so Schiton knife was you, but now it's not, you know. Damn, you really throws some on that. Schachten. You got to get in there. Eat the knife. So I had chicken, and it was a big deal. It was college. I had a piece of chicken or a couple pieces, whatever,

and I woke up the next day with a cold sore. For real, yeah. And I was like, you know, I assumed it was guilt. I assumed God is it. What was it? I think it was psychological guilt that led to a cold sore. So when you ate the chicken, you were aware. I also fucked the girl's herpes.

Also ate some pussy on a loose woman. Yeah. But so when you ate it, Were you like, here I go. Yeah. Like I'm not shameful about sex, but I was shameful about eating chicken. That's crazy. Honestly, I would take that trade.

I would take that. Shameless nuts versus going like, oh. You get a cheeseburger, but you get hell and being ashamed every time you're sex. Every time I squeeze a nut out, I go, who am I? I don't feel guilty about masturbation at all, which is interesting. I used to feel a lot of, I used to feel a lot of guilt about it. People tell me they do. And I have friends who actually have done the no fap-inning or whatever it's called.

And I'm just like, I just- By the way, those boys are just trying to edge as much as possible. That's just straight up gooning. Yeah. You're not fucking above anybody. Well, you know what it is? It's like master, like, because I've, you know, I have friends who are like, yeah, who think they're sex addicts, but then they're also like, you're probably a sex addict

too. You don't realize it. Not that I do anything like that. Sure. But just, just, I don't know, just thinking about it. Just enjoying sex? But in my head, I'm just like masturbation. Even if it is an addiction, it's a healthy addiction.

I think it's, well, I don't know if how healthy is. I mean, physically it's not bad for you. I think it is the equivalent of devenoming a snake. When you see it where they put the snakes and it gets the glass and the venom comes out, you're just devenoming yourself. So you don't have to shoot up a school. Yeah. Or you're not harassing a comedy club waitress.

Yeah, exactly. You just are like, when you have empty nuts. Right. Louis never jerked off and that's why this happened. Yes. And that's why you should have been doing it in his private life. Then he got a came in way more even-headed. But there is something to be said about, like, doing it and being...

That's why, like, I think a lot of comics are surprised when they find out that every comic gets to their hotel room and jerks off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you're just devenoming yourself for the city. Well, you know, I'm a visitor here. I should probably take the venom out of me. Jack it off is like, after you jack off, you're kind of like, oh, I'm not stressed about things anymore. You also go, who is that guy? I'm always like, what the fuck was I going to?

I know. There is... Yeah, I don't feel shame, but I do feel that. like, you're, yeah, Louis talks about, like,

you're back to reality and you're like, it's like kind of like coming to at a car scene, a car traffic accident. Yeah, it is how I used to feel when I would,

um, get drunk. Yeah. And then I'd wake up and I'd go like, who was that? Yeah. That wasn't me. And then,

that's how you get when you're like super horny. Right. Fuck. And then you, and then you masturbate and you go, but you know, I have like a pretty strong libido because I'm, I guess I'm a Jew,

but, uh, got that heble lib libid. So like, I think Jackingoff is bad if you then are having sex with your partner later and you can't fuck. Yeah, that's that's wasting. That's the fuel. Yeah, it's the fuel.

You're wasting your seed. But I can usually still fuck. That's crazy. So it's like, it's not an issue to me. In fact, I have enough libido where I can be a sex addict and fuck my wife consistently. Yeah,

that would be to me to the point where I'd go, that might be too much. Yeah. Because I think in my early 20s I was like that, my 20s. And then as I hit my late, my late 20s, I started being like, it was also coincided with me quitting drinking.

Because when I quit drinking, I got like super horny. Yeah. And then it dissipated. Like within the year, it started being like back to normal. I mean, it's not strong as it used to be,

but I'm still, I always like. I think I would have had a higher libido if I wasn't so shamed about it. Yeah, yeah, probably. I think I would have felt more inclined to be like, this is a good, it would have made me go into it instead of going like,

well, I like, my problem. Right. Is this a problem? My, guys either if they have sexual problems they lean towards either like coming early or not being able to get it up sure i always lean towards coming early which i always felt was like a sign of a libido oh really so turned on i always took it as a sign of tenderness i'm so tender i'm so tender please kind of you know it's gentle yeah

i'm just such a tender boy but i always think it's interesting where you're like watching how people what people are sensitive towards or what people have shame for Yeah. To see how they grow up and you go, that's the interesting part. And yes, this episode's brought to you by better help. But that's to me the interesting part of therapy is like following the cord to something and going like, like I remember asking my therapist. I was like, hey, is it possible that I was molested and I blocked it out? And that's the reason I have like a weird time being intimate. And my therapist was like, no.

you just completely lack intimacy. He's like, you just need to work on you allowing intimacy in. Yeah. And you go, that's such a less sexy answer than going, I think you got sucked off by your uncle when you were four. That's what I was hoping because that's such an easy fix. Well, I think the blocking out thing is pretty rare. I think usually when you get fucked, you remember it.

But I do think there are people that block it out because I do think there's a trauma response that goes on my body. It's the same thing we were talking about with the government about how they just walk. All off those conspiracy theories. The government just walls off the rest of the government for finding out about it. Right, right. I think your brain can do that. It can. People can also have false memories, too.

Sure. Oh, absolutely. I think that's a very thing thing. Like those 60 women, Bill Cosby allegedly. All false memories. You never do that. Go watch the Dennis bit on himself and tell me that man's a risk. Isn't that funny when people were defending him and it just kept him being more and more women

and they're like eventually defending him became really exhausting. It's that lady. This woman's lying. She took a lie. The meme of the ladies smoking the cigarette out back of the Wendy's. They're just like, I can't. I think what's crazy about the whole Cosby thing is that Hannibal did it in a, like a riff. It wasn't even like a finished joke.

It was a riff someone filmed that it ended. And he was like, pick up your pants. And he goes, what about all those ladies? What about those ladies you? And everyone was like, what? It was like a, yeah, it was just like. It really was a throwaway line. I filmed on a phone.

The original, I feel like there was three major comic moments that were filmed. There was that, Bill Burr, telling everyone to go. In Philly on the virus tour. Telling everyone to get fucked by big black dicks or whatever. When he was on Bobby Kelly's podcast with like me, Nate Lewis enlist, we asked him about that. And he was like, I was afraid that was going to become my thing. Right.

Like I would go do stand up and people would just fucking yell at me and then I would have to fight back. And he did get bigger from that, right? That was a viral. So it's interesting. Because they booed Dom Marrera. They booted like a bunch of people before him, and he went out like looking for the fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And it's interesting because people, Bill Burr's such a pure artist. And we talked shit about people that go viral for something. He really did go viral for something. That was like one of the first viral stand-up moments. You had that and then Kramer's crowdwork that went. Big Jay and I, Big Jay quotes that in the funniest way where we were making fun of someone.

What if he did that? And then Big Jay hits the line. He goes, see, there's that word again. There's that word. Lenny Bruce trying to like see the George Carlin. They're just words. PJ nails that exact part of it every time. We're all just words.

That's what he is. There's that little word. It's like, it's like full George Carlin. It is. Fuck you, you, Edward piece of shit. Yeah.

These words. Because when you see how Kramer, how mad he gets at, dude, when you watched the, have you watched the Letterman Apology? Recently? Was Michael,

Richard is Jerry, Synefeld's there? I remember Seinfeld be there. I remember the audience laughing and Seinfeld going, it's not funny. And I remember thinking, because he comes on and they're going, this is like before the internet's everywhere.

So they just go like, oh, it's Kramer. And he goes, I'm really sorry. And they go, oh. And Jerry's like, it's not funny. I always felt it was a little cocky Seinfeld saying that. I don't know why. It just really rubbed me the wrong way that the audience is laughing because they don't know what's going on.

And he's like, quit laughing. But it's like, you're here trying to save your residuals for Seinfeld. And we won't have to edit this out because I'll never have to bump into him. He was a guy that when I moved here, I was so excited to like see. I was obsessed with the documentary comedian, obsessed with it. Yeah. That's why Colin Quinn is like my favorite part of that whole documentary. But I was obsessed with that documentary.

My friend Zach gave it to me on my 17th birthday. It's pretty genius. Who do you get? Who can you cast to make Seinfeld look likable or the Adams? Make Seinfeld look. Just grounded? man the um when he tells the story about the band landing in the field at stand up york i was like he's the man yeah he understands stand up and it was like i was a comedy nerd so it fed everything

i wanted i was moving i was like part of the reason why i moved to new york city was tough crowd opi and anthony and comedian yeah and like watching comedian i was like like i still think about that documentary where i'm in the hallway about to go up at the cellar and i think about that like Sherrod, when Jerry walks up and Sherrod Small is hosting. And he goes, go up, Sharad's going up? Wait, Charade's in it? Very young, Sharad Small.

Oh, really? The first five minutes. When it shows, Manny, go, there's a certain compulsion I've noticed. Oh, wow, I forgot that. Go watch that documentary. I used to watch it once a year. God, Charade Small is like 400 years old.

He's like, I remember when. He's forced to look at pictures. I open for Mark Twain. Yeah, he goes, Mark Twain's real name was Samuel Cleans. I have that breath by that shit. You talk about Sammy? Fuck Sammy.

I knew Sammy before he went by Marsway. He was just been around for a lot. He's in like all these old pictures. Like Jack Nicholson and the Shining. It's like 1919 and Shiraz. When I saw Don Rickles do his first open mic, I was like, this kid has something. I was friends of two out of the three marks brothers.

Holy shit, that's fucking crazy. But that documentary, like, this is how Joe List and I became such good friends. Oh, really? Because we would go do open mics and like have beers or whatever. We'd quoted at each other without queuing each other up on it. We'd do the call on it. Quinn where he's in the tuxedo and he goes, what are you doing this weekend? He goes,

this weekend? Working here. That was like one of our favorite lines. But you know what, you know what Seinfeld says on that? I just actually really think it's not true. I've learned Seinfeld at one point goes, even if you're a celebrity, even if you're Jack Nicholson up there, after a couple lines, you're like, what's next? And I'm like, that's not true. You can be a celebrity on stage. Maybe they won't laugh a lot, but they'll say they love it because crowds are star Fuckers. True. But I push back on that.

I think Jerry's right. And I would say... Pulling a real Louis catch right now. He's my inspirato. I'm gonna... I'm gonna do the thing. I know this is hard for you too. You're such a people police.

You're like, you're like, I'm gonna disagree with you. Find your inner power. Come on, Dan, you'll do it. Your instinct is just to be like, you're totally right. God, what a good point. Push back.

You're like, you son of a bitch. I'm going to disagree. Madonna at the cellar. She bombed. Did she bomb? First five minutes, it's exactly what Seinfeld said. They said, all right, Madonna. And then she fucking bombed.

All right. Well, she bombed so bad, Liz wouldn't send me the tape. And I asked. I said, Liz, I got to see that set. And Liz goes, I'm not fucking sending you that date. And I was like, fair. That's fair. All right.

I wanted to watch that, and she kept doing the thing. Let me rephrase. A famous man. No. That might not be wrong. Well, I saw Michael Rappapur do an hour once, and the audience seemed happy. There wasn't anything. But he sounds like he's a comic.

He sounds like, he does the rhythm. There are, there are Fugazis in this business. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You go from half of comics. Well, yeah, from a 15 foot, my buddies when I worked in Alaska, they'd call these, it was such a mean thing, but I thought it was so funny. They'd call women 15 foot. fakeouts where you go like from 15 feet away with these guys that live on boats yeah yeah yeah

yeah like they'd see a woman they girl's hot 15 foot fake out yeah yeah yeah yeah and you walk up and in alaska it was it was so funny i mean that's probably the majority of comics yeah but i'm saying from their act you go oh it sounds like it yeah yeah because they do the they do the rhythm they do the cadence and they go oh it's probably how a lot of rappers feel yeah yeah yeah yeah because they go this motherfucker does it's kind of saying shit but it's just yeah yeah And he goes, hummusis, how this, how? Hummusis, how, this, hummusis, how? And they go, I don't even know if you're right.

I had that realization. I was listening to a recording once at a club. I performed, and I was listening to the audio the next day. And I do this one joke. I was doing well, so there was already a rhythm going. I did this one joke, and I got the punchline completely in reverse, or just where it didn't make sense, and the audience still laughed. Yeah.

It was like realizing how empty this is in that moment. When Joe List became friends with Louis C.K., which to watch in real time was incredible. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because, I mean, we're talking about, me, him and Nate used to sit around and debate like, oh my God, when that special came out. Yeah, yeah. I remember being at Barcelona bar having beers and being like, this joke sucked.

This joke was incredible. We were arguing with it. I think me and Nate were team Burr and List was team Louis. Yeah, yeah. So we would argue like, no, this joke for joke, literally go joke for joke. But we were friends and then List becomes friends with Louis. And List would always say this thing about Chris Rock where he would go, there's a line in, I think, think it's bigger and blacker where he says when you're when you're white the sky is the limit

and when you're black the limits the sky yeah yeah and list would like he would give like speech about it yeah yeah it doesn't it's the same thing but the rhythm the limits the sky you're right and he's doing the Chris Rock thing yeah yeah yeah yeah the limit that is the sky and it's like gets a huge laugh it's this is one of my favorite stories I mean I don't know if Joe's ever told this publicly so if If I get in trouble, Joe, I love you, and forgive me for telling the story. But I think this is so funny. So Joe's on the road with Louis, and they're having, like, breakfast or something.

I forget where they are. They might even be in New York, but they're having a meal, and they're talking comedy. And Liss brings this up. This point that he's opined on before that I know he has in the chamber. And he brings it up to Louis, and Louis's texting. And Joe's like, hey, it just fucking doesn't make any sense. And Louis puts his phone down, he goes, yeah, just texted Rock that you said that. And then you don't fucking text them?

Why are you playing it? I was like, just listening. And he goes, yeah, he's texting what you said. I thought that was like one of my favorite moments. You go, fuck, that would give me so much anxiety where I go, don't text them. Please edit that. I mean, it's like laughter is kind of instinctual. So it's like you need the rhythm.

Like, it is true. I think that's why I hated being a people pleaser so much. I also think that's why my. stand-up was weak until my HBO special was because I was such a people-pleaser that I would do bits that would get reactions and I would still kind of know that the bit wasn't finished but it got a good reaction so I go well it's making people right right right so it's good and until my HBO special that was the first time where I was like what we're talking about the beginning like junkyarding shit yeah yeah yeah this bit isn't good but there's good lines in it right well you have to learn how to

crush and then you can make the decision to fucking you know yeah because people don't realize shit can crush. Like bullshit can crush. That's why, I mean, comedy is like the one art form. Which I really, I really, I know. I hate calling it. It's carny work. The truth is it's half an art form and half like a sport.

I think it's half carnival behavior. Yeah. Half fear of doing actual art. That's what I think it is. Well, let's just say this. It can be artistic. I think it can, and it's best. Yeah.

But it's one field where you're just with so many used car salesmen who just, and I just have to like, like fucking Hemingway didn't have to hang out with some fucking, some beat rider that's like, yeah, I don't know, dude, I'm a pulp rider. I'm just making up murder stories. I just write the same poem every week to get pussy. Are you still working on your fish book? Yeah, it's called Old Man in the Sea. Yeah.

It's kind of a big deal. It's an analogy. Never mind. Yeah, but you, I mean. And you can tell it's a shitty field because it's all. Also the only, if it is an art form, it's the only field where some of the biggest names endorse Trump. Well, it's also, we're at the point now where stand-up has left its containment area

and spread to the point where, I'm sorry, you know, if you're a fan of this podcast and you've listened, you've heard me to make this point before, we inherited everybody that should have been an MTV Vijay. Yeah, yeah. Should have been a DJ. Yeah. Should have been a party promoter. Yeah.

Should have been a serial. Yes. Should have been a serial. Crivolute. Focused, yeah. Criminals and bad people. Files. It's imperative.

You just get people that come in here because they know they can fake it. Yeah. And they're still called a comedian. Sure. Even though I know people that grew up. I knew people that are successful at comedy, right? Yeah.

That don't like comedy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know I can name over. And again, you know the rule. I'm the second part of that. Yeah. But if you see me live, I'll give you names. I will not give it publicly.

but if in person you come to one of my shows and you go, hey, you were talking about this, I'll give me the list. I don't have a fuck. Like, imagine. If it's off air, I'll give you the phone. It is, like, imagine if you're just like, what's it?

Like, you're just like a classical composer. And there's another person who's called a classical composer, but all they are is a racist. They're just a racist. Do you understand I'm fucking deaf? This guy is still writing music? This guy is just saying racist things and he has millions of followers.

Beethoven watching like someone like that where he's not even a composer and he's watching him going, Come on. Come on. I'm not even twying. He's like, I'm composing

that I always fit. I can't even fucking hear what I'm saying. And they're like, I don't know. It's just like, if you hear like bach or something,

he's like, fuck the heck. I like how he got, I think he got deaf in his like 50s, but I like how he still takes the retur voice. Oh,

no. I'm giving him the deafs the whole life. Which the deaf voice, People took the deaf voice to do the R-word voice. You're like how I'm being politically correct after I already said it. Can we edit that? That's like, what are you kissing during a rape?

This Edward comes over with his African-American. I go, you let him fly with an R. He's fucking crazy. But yeah, I think the deaf voice is the R word of voices. Yeah, for Beethoven. Did you go deaf like a month ago? Yeah, he goes. Don't you know how to talk?

He's reading their lips? That's his Beethoven? What the fuck you use? But so, yeah, it's just like there are people in our field who are just, we know comedians and I know these people who go on stage and just say mean things. They're not. I'm joking. Yeah, but they're not even funny.

They're just mean. And everyone's like, that's awesome. Katie and I were talking about this exact thing yesterday, which is one of my pet peeves is when someone says something mean and it doesn't get a reaction. they want so they go, I was just joking, you know, but you weren't. But you weren't until that. We were talking about. You're just joking like when I asked a girl if I want to make a move and she's like, no.

And I'm like, it was just a bit. Yeah, exactly. But we were talking about the coach of the Denver Broncos, Sean Peyton. Their quarterback, Bo Nicks broke his ankle. And then it turned out that he had had a broken ankle in high school and a broken ankle at Auburn before he transferred to Oregon. And Sean Payton went, oh, in that case, I wouldn't have drafted him if I would have known that. And he's like, no, I'm just joking.

And he goes, no, that was real. That was real. You were like, I actually meant that shit. And then a couple days later, he was like, yeah, he kind of hid information from me that that ankle was a problem. And Bo Nix was like, I never hid any information. And he's like, and I don't think he should have said that. And you're like, so he wasn't.

Because he did a second thing where you go, that is what you believe. Well, it's literally like, yeah, like I remember the first time I made a move on a girl. I was like, we should like make out. And then she. I don't remember. I just did that all time. And that would have been a joke. Would it be funny if I kissed you right now?

And that's literally what Trump is doing with, maybe we'll cancel the elections. It's a joke unless I get away with it. Which Obama should have really, if he would have known that was coming, Obama doing that would have been funny. He's like, I'm going to fuck every white woman in America. It's joking. I'm just joking. I'm going to make you all have black husbands.

Just joking. Back to our point of being in a field where you watch people fake it, I think that's important because I think that makes good comics more valuable. Yeah. And I think we're going through a place right now. where people are going, there's so much shit out there. And I go, there is a lot of shit. But there's very few good comics.

But that's what's good about it. They're embrace them. Yeah. Like, blow on those embers. Yeah, yeah. Fan those flames. No, I'm very loud. I like having you on here because you put out great fucking comedy.

Thanks, buddy. Morbidly, morbidly Jewish. What's called morbidly obese? Mortgage of shit. I don't even know. I'm sorry. Morbidly kike, fat kike, whatever it is. Fat hebe is out now.

morbidly morbidly Jewish you want to recall fat he'd be good funny if I just called it morbidly obese just morbidly obese please go watch

run on special he is I know we talk a lot of shit about people out there that suck he's not one of them he's a fucking great comic and I just like genuinely love this shit

and I love people that love this shit and that's always what I want to like push is like there are people that grew up watching Woody Allen. Yeah, yeah. Brooks that when they were little, they're like, I could never do this. And then you get to do it.

And you go like, how cool is it I get to do this? Yeah. No, I would like sometimes some people comment like, you're not funny to me. And I want to be arrogant, but I just kind of want to comment back because like, I write jokes.

Like, you should like, like, like, that's such a rare thing. It's like, yeah. My thing is, I have too many tax returns to disagree. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can just go look at tax returns and go like, yeah, yeah.

You and you might not think I'm funny. That's fine. You don't have to think I'm funny. There are a lot of people that do. And I'm going to go. You know what I always think about it is my favorite thing about being funny and what's always got me in trouble at other jobs was I always liked making my coworkers laugh. And I always liked being a part of the job where it was like a relief where it was like we were sitting,

we're waiting tables. We're sitting off in the hutch making each other laugh. If I'm working at bed bath and beyond, we're unpacking boxes. Yeah. making each other laugh. It's always been, I'm at the bar having a beer with you. I would say stylistically, that's what I want as my comedy. You don't have to be in the break room with us.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you don't like it. Of course, yeah, yeah. Go empty other boxes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't like it. Move down the bar and have a beer. I'm not one of these people that's like, fuck you, what you like a shit.

Yeah. You can find something you like. And if it ain't me, it ain't me, but I don't need to engage with you anymore. No, of course not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you just, yeah, it's not worth it. Yeah. And there's enough people.

on the planet, you can just find whoever. Eight billion. There's someone for you. When I think about eight billion, I'm like, I really should have a bigger fan base. Like every time it breaks my heart. Like there's eight billion people and I got 20 people to see me in Kansas. Yeah,

but you don't realize two billion of them live. Miles below our poverty line. Where if you brought them a glass of clean water, they did it. You're my favorite comic. You're my favorite comic and I subscribe. I'm subscribe to your Patreon because it's indoor plumbing. Your Patreon is a bath.

Right, right, right, right. And you're like, that's pretty cool. But morbidly Jewish is the special. The link is in the bio down here of the video. Ronan is fucking hilarious, and I'm glad you came by. Oh, it's always a pleasure. Thanks for having me. Thanks, buddy.