Soder - 36: Sweating Through Clothes with Adam Rowe | Soder Podcast | EP 36

Episode Date: July 17, 2024

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What's your first time ever underpacking? I tried to like for the first time ever underpack. I was like, just pack because I'm such an overpacker. If I'm going somewhere for a week, I'll take like 15 outfits. You want, do you have a lot of just in cases? Yeah. Smart.

Yeah, especially with like underwear. Yeah. Two a day? Yeah, but and then like two extras. And in my head it's like, What if you shit yourself? Yeah, and then like two extras. And in my head it's like... What if you shit yourself? Yeah, but I've never shit myself. The second you don't pack is the second you shit yourself.

But I think it would probably make more sense for the one time I do shit myself to just buy new underwear in the... I'm in New York or something. You're doing well. Yeah. That's also the thing. You're doing well. Someone had to tell me that.

I can afford some fresh underwear. Comics keep this mindset. Like we're still- No matter where you get to. Can't be where you're like, I gotta bring my underwear. But I think it's smart to bring underwear. Specifically packing for anyone watching this.

Packing overpack underwear because it takes up less space and it's the most necessary. Absolutely. But this time out, like I don't know where, I was like, I'm just gonna pack properly. I'm just gonna like two outfits a day, one for the day, walking around one for the night when we're going for drinks and whatever. And I just by chance, I checked this morning

and the only thing I had left was like a retro Liverpool football club drill top. And I went to put it on and it's got like a stain on the top because it's not the same thing you'd wash. It's like a jacket. Yeah. So I was like, I've got it out the wardrobe and I've put it in and I was like, right, and I bought this and I thought, right, I'll just put that on. I've come out in Williamsburg and it's quite cold.

We've gone for like brunch, sweet chicken, got like chicken and waffles. And we've come out and I was like, oh, it's getting a little bit warmer. You get over into Manhattan, it's absurd. And the heat's got nowhere to go. No's trapped in the building bouncing off every like reflective window I'm walking around with carl's got a hoodie on a jacket over it. Oh Like yeah, was he sweating he got him in sweating worse than you were we both completely fucked it and I can't now

Like I'd love like it's air condon here. So it's great, but I'd love to take this off, but I can feel yeah I can see the line in the back oh the back feel the back if it's snow in my back sweat and put like the tits wet there now the worst is that when you pull it and you feel the breeze go in when it cools your tits sweat and you go like oh fuck that's a lot of tits what absolutely yeah I walked my dog this morning being like looked outside fuck I checked my app. I was like, all right, 58 degrees. You know, I was like, that's pretty cold. You'll have to translate. I know. And I'm trying, you know what? If you break the film down, there's a moment in a split second where I go, what is that? I don't know. Just

commit. That's the one. That's the one like reference. Cause I always think like it's a little harder for a British comic to do stuff in America than the other way around because we get every reference you guys every TV show and culture you have we get. That's what we dominated with military and culture. Yeah. That's why we were like, hey, we're going to put bases everywhere and we're going to have TV shows everywhere. But the one thing like the Brits are refusing to take from America is this Fahrenheit bullshit. But the one thing like the Brits are refusing to take from America is this Fahrenheit bullshit. Yeah, you guys do Celsius. Which by the way, when I was there, when I saw you in 2021, I would look and I'd be like, fucking 30, this is freezing. And it's the hottest day in London's

history. And I was like, it's 35. I didn't get it. What is that in Fahrenheit? I mean, dude, I'm going to do the cali. I'm going to do the, this is how dumb I am. I have to do it. What is that in Fahrenheit? I mean, dude, I'm going to do the cali. I'm going to do the, this is how dumb I am. I have to do it on my phone, but, um, Celsius to Fahrenheit. So what I said was- It's complicated, isn't it? It's not like, cause it's something like double it, triple it, divide it, and then you add something.

It doesn't make any- It was, I thought it was 14 degrees Celsius this morning. That's what it was. It was 14 Celsius. So I was like, little chilly, but not cold. No, that's perfect. Perfect. That's my perfect temperature.

Anything from like 14 to 18 degrees Celsius. Which people in Wisconsin are going like, 14, 18, pretty cold. It's pretty goddamn cold. That's pretty cold, but it is. So like you said 18 is your perfect, right? Yeah, I think so, yeah. And then what I love about Google is it's like,

oh, you want to go to Fahrenheit. So that's 65 degrees, which is perfect. Yeah, it's like as good as it gets. And that is, I loved a little bit colder because it's sweatshirt weather. Where during the day you can wear a t-shirt and then at night a sweatshirt. Yeah. Totally.

Yeah. I just, I don't like- But we're starting to hit this thing now where, I mean, tomorrow it's going to be hot. Tomorrow it's going to be- Yeah, the day before we arrived, because we only arrived Thursday. Yeah. And the day before, apparently it was really hot. It was like 27 Celsius. Yeah, yeah.

7.3 billion. I'm going to keep going with Google. I think it was like 83. Two English speaking grown men are trying to have a conversation and we need Google. I think it was like 83. Two English speaking grown men are trying to have a conversation and we need Google Translate for it. I feel like, I am hot. It's like, I am hot.

Yeah. It's, yeah, I, there's a lot of people, especially in the UK, because obviously our weather's constantly dog shit. Like people are like, oh. I would disagree. I would say you have my favorite weather. Cloudy and a little chilly is...

But it's not consistent though. The problem I have with UK weather, because I like that as well. I love it. I'm quite happy to have, the perfect weather for me, and this is, I don't know whether this is a Liverpool thing or a UK thing, is like a sweater, but with shorts. Brother, all weekend, now you were like,

hey, are you around this weekend? I took this weekend and do nothing. I saw you out with my dog. That was one of four- Odds of that, by the way. Which is in Bad Ends. It's insane. It was one of four times I left my house this weekend.

I'm not joking. Saturday and Sunday, I left my house four times. I saw you on one of those times because you and Carl were going to- Book of Mormon. Book of Mormon. And I was talking to my friend Charlie down there, which by the way, he's like,

he's like one of the head door guys at like a very fucking nice building over there, right by Madison Square Park. It was a nice place, yeah. I used to be a waiter and he used to be my busser. Oh wow. Like 15 years ago, 16 years ago. Is that the first time you've seen him? No, I know he works there. I was walking over from the stand one night. Yeah, and he was like got off work

He's like yo soda He's like you're on the door guy here So what I thought when I walk my dog by there I always see if Charlie's working and I stopped and we talked, you know, Nick's nuggets whatever NBA NFL whatever is going on The fact you bump into anyone. It's great. Like I did maths until I got to university and I was I'm going to be a comic and I fucked it off. Sure. But like statistics always fascinate me. Right.

So I think in New York, well, people who live in New York or might be in New York for me, there might be 50 people that I know well enough to stop. Like, you know, hey, Like, there's like 10 American comics that I've met and worked with or been for lunch with, like you and Shultz, Shane, who like I would stop and be like, how you doing, lads?

You're doing all right, good to see ya. There's so many that I know or I've like bumped into who I probably would just be like, oh, I met them once before, but I'll keep going and whatever. Like, you're the only person I'd text this weekend because I knew I was coming to do this. Yeah.

And we're walking down the street and you're there and we walk away and Carl's like, that is impossible. Like, it's not unlikely. It's, we're in New York, which has got what? It's like 15 million people or something in the city. And you're walking, by the way, on a busy Saturday. One of the four times you've left your house this weekend. One of the four times I left is to get a poop out of Myrtle.

But it happens to me all the time. Like a couple of weeks ago, me and Carl were walking through Liverpool. And this is so funny. One of our friends was having problems with his missus. And we were going to meet up with him and have like, you know, the boys chat me like everything's going to be all right or whatever.

Yeah, yeah. The weather, the storm talk. Yeah, totally. It's going to be fine. And we're walking through Liverpool city center. And I said to Carl, I go, what would happen? How do you think she'd react right now if like one of my ex-girlfriends

just walking down these stairs? Cause walking down like this narrow bit of the city where if she's coming down these stairs, she's committed. Like there's no like left or right or turn around. I was like, what do you think would happen? And he's like, I think she'd just like be all right. And then she'd probably get a hundred yards away and she might start crying

cause she might not be over it and whatever. I was like, yeah, yeah. And I've got like three exes that we were sort of talking about. And we were like, yeah, yeah. And I swear less than a hundred yards later, my ex-girlfriend's walking towards us. You've talked it into existence.

But it's so impossible. And it happens to me all the time. It's lightning strikes. It's like the probability of a lightning strike. Is that happening? The worst one I ever had in my life was when I lived in Queens. I lived by a subway that you'd have to take into the city.

And I broke up with this girl and it was kind of a bad breakup. This is 14 or 13 years ago. And we worked together at the restaurant and I stopped working at the restaurant. And we broke up. And not a bad breakup, but a sad breakup. And I ended up hooking up with a friend of mine,

her and I were friends and we hooked up and it was like one of those drinking nights where the next morning you're like, this is nuts. And I had to go to a gig and I was like, let's get a coffee and get on the train, I gotta go meet these people. And we get on the train, we're not even thinking about it and the door opens and my ex walks on it.

I was like, no, no, no, no. And I was just like, no, but it's not. Oh, what the fuck are the odds? I get on this train all the time and I never see her. So Carl always says to me, and for those who don't know, Carl is like my best friend from school who I'm here with. A cohost of Have A Word podcast, a hilarious podcast, check it out.

Yeah, please do. Everywhere you get podcasts. But he's always like things like that just happen to you. last week, I was in the pub that I go to. Like I've got one pub in Liverpool. I'm just there all the time. I love that. That's what I miss the most about drinking. Having one place. Do you not drink anymore? 11 years ago I stopped. Oh yeah, we spoke about this. Yeah. I look like all I want six pints of Guinness and that's just the perfect night for me. Six pints of Guinness with live music on and my pub in Liverpool is just that's every night of the week. That's what it is open till 3 a.m.

So if you want to go late you can go. Which that doesn't happen a lot in England. No it does in Liverpool. It doesn't happen a lot in London or Edinburgh which I think is where you've spent most of your time. Yeah that's where I spent most of my time. As a drinking town London's dog shit. I hate it. It's like LA. Yeah, it's just. LA is a dog shit drinking town. If you're a member of like one, like Soho house or something,

you can get a drink until three or whatever. And then if you want to go to like a gay club, you can go there. But there your options. The gays are like, we're open all night, baby. But you just have to live a lifestyle. It also feels less gay to go to a gay club than Soho House. Yeah, you're like, the pretentiousness is way low,

which does feel, those Soho Houses, you feel like, cause I've been to one here, I've been to one, I've had lunch at one in London. Yeah. It feels illuminati. Yeah, well it is. Yeah. It's like show business illuminati, like everyone.

Everyone's like, there he is. It's, oh. And you're doing well. So you go to a Soho house now. You probably see people that five years ago wouldn't have pissed on you. Totally. That's actually one of my favorite things.

Cause you know at the Edinburgh Festival, you know like the industry bars, like the abattoir and the loft and stuff. Oh yeah, there's different bars for those who don't know we're talking about the Fringe Festival in Edinburgh Scotland which is a full month of just hundreds if not a thousand shows going on but there is a... It's hard to describe to those who haven't been because every single... Because festivals in the United States last a week two weeks totally. Totally, yeah.

This one's a whole month, people live there. Every single bar has an hour of stand up on, every hour of every day for a month. And then there's like secret little bars, like cliques, where you go to like this bar. Like if you're with Live Nation, they're like, you got to go to this bar. And then you go and everyone just smells each other's butts the entire time. It's so funny. And like, I drink in them when I'm there because of where all the comics are.

I couldn't survive in them because I didn't drink. So I would go there for like an hour. That's awful. And then we had a weed, me and Sean Penn had a weed vape. And I'd be like, I gotta go hit this weed vape. And I'd just go out there and be like, I'm gonna walk around Edinburgh. I was like, I don't wanna go to this bar.

I did the festival last year. The tour I'm just coming to the end to now, I'm gonna walk around Edinburgh. I was like, I don't wanna go to the bar. So I did the festival last year. Okay. The tour I'm just coming to the end to now, I went to sort of run that hour in before I took it on the road. Which for comics, it's the greatest. You just do your hour once a day for a full month. It's so cool. It's what I did for my HBO special.

And it was like, I will do it again, because it was so great. If you do it properly and you actually use it for what it is, which is... If you go with like... Because in the UK, it's waning now. It's not the same. But like everyone had this idea that that's where you make it and that's where you become a star and TV can pick you up.

Obviously, TV's power is dying and there's access through podcasts and everything to the mass market just by making your own stuff. But there's still this idea with some like styles of comics where they're like, I've got to have a good end of my show because then I'll be famous. And so people still go with that idea and they're spending 10 grand on like posters around the city and stuff to try and get their name out. But if you go up, like I did it last year and I love a drink, but last year I did it sober. I was like, I'm gonna just not drink for a month. I'm gonna go to gym every day

and I'm gonna play golf like four times a week. We're in Scotland, they got some good golf courses. It's class. So I would wake up at like eight, get to the course, get the first tea, play on my own, play a full 18 until lunchtime on my own, come back, have a nap, wake up, have dinner, and then my show was at nine fifty five every night.

And I would go to those bars and because I wasn't drinking, I would be there 45 minutes. I'd speak to a couple of the comics I'm made to it. And then I'd be like, I can't do this. I got caught in a couple conversations with the wrong comics. I didn't know. And you are just drowning. You're like, I don't care. And you're such a like,

as an American comic in Edinburgh, because not many of you bother with it, because it's so far away and you're away for a month. You're such a commodity. You're like the American guy who's come to actually give it a go and everyone knows you're warming up for a HBO special

and you're so the little weasels who are like doing their first hour. You're the one person that bother like that's done so now. I've been here for hours. The worst ones were the, the European comics that were trying to tell me that because they do fringe, that it's better for standup than New York City. Where they were like, yeah, we do an hour every night here and I go, yeah, yeah, but we do like three shows a night every night, any night you feel like it.

And they're like, just this one Irish guy just wouldn't stop. He just wouldn't stop. I saw him twice and both times he's like, we work harder than you. And you're like, I don't think you do. I definitely don't. I don't think you do. They definitely don't. I don't think you do. They definitely, definitely do not.

In his defense, he was hammered both times I saw him, but both times I'm like, buddy, I don't think you understand. You're not gonna get me to go like, yeah, you do. I was just like, fuck off. I wanna go get high and play Nintendo. I don't wanna talk to you. Like I've always sort of had one eye on America.

Yeah. I think my style is quite Americanized. My favorite comics are Americans. And sort of, I like putting our shows together that, you know, are an hour. Like, the last special I put up was one hour long story. Sure. A couple of tangents, but it's a story.

Yeah. Which is a very sort of British way of doing it. But I won't do that unless the bits also work in a club in when you split them up a bit. Yeah, but that's the way you should do it. It's but it's it's it's so, so much stronger over here. The comedy club culture in the UK compared to the US is so much weaker. And I think we've got some really great comics in the UK.

I've never, what I've never seen in the UK, I was thinking about this earlier, I was talking about it. I've never seen someone in the UK make it and then get better, ever. Really? People make it and then they go, I can do arenas now. Cause like, you don't have to be as big as you do in the States to do arenas in the UK.

Do you know what I mean? Like once you get- Well it's small, you know, a much smaller area. It's a smaller area, you don't need as many people. Like I know there's people in the US who are stand ups because I follow, like anyone who comes up that I think is a good comic, I follow them and you know, you're constantly trying

to make new connections and stuff. Especially because I want to be out here as much as I possibly can. There's people with much bigger followings than me over here who can't sell as many tickets as I do back home because you don't need to be as big. Do you know what I mean? Yeah.

But comics get to arena level in the UK and then they go, I can just do this forever. And they don't care about being great at it. Yeah, they made it. They take their foot off the gas. They're like, I'm making two million pound a night. But something that translates overseas and not only just in comedy, but in like, you know, entertainment industry over in general is when someone gets big, which you have, have a word blew up, your stand up blew up. It was awesome. I remember hanging out in 2021 and then watching you take more

and more steps, but you're also working your ass off and getting better. Was Edinburgh, was it different when you went this year? It's, it's so different. So that's the second time I've been to Edinburgh since it blew up, since Have a Weird became what it is. So for those who don't know, and there'll be most people who listen to the show, I suppose, like we started Have a Weird in January of 2020.

So just before COVID hit, and as March approached and like countries in Europe were shutting down, it was so not feasible before COVID hit. And as March approached and like countries in Europe were shutting down, it was so not feasible that they were gonna do that in the UK. It was like, they're not gonna lock us down. They're just not gonna do it. I mean, that's how New York was.

That's how everyone in the United States was. Florida still never got locked down. Florida was like- Liverpool was a lot like Florida during COVID in the end. Cause it was like, we can do what? Like at one point it was like, you've got to have a meal if you want to drink alcohol. So people were going to restaurants and going,

we'll have 12 beers and you can put a pizza on the table. I love that. That was a law. That was a fucking law. And no one went, this is fucking insane. They're going to break this rule. They're going to bend the rule every time. Because of like the social distancing, this is true.

So I went on a first date, like during COVID. So we had like tiers. So depending on how like infected your city was, it was tier one, two and three. If you were tier three, it meant like, oh, there's not that much infection. And Liverpool for a while was tier three. Sure. And it was, so if you're in tier three, the restaurants can be open, but you have to have the six feet social distancing.

And you, if you were drinking alcohol, you have to have food with it. So I go on this first date and we go to the first place we went to, we just get some food and we're having a good time and then I bought, there was a bar around the corner that I knew was like nice and we're going to have music on. So I was like, we'll go there. And we walk in and they go, oh, here's what we're doing. We know you don't want the food.

So we know you've got to be social distanced. So we're going to put like, there's going to be your table and then what would normally be another table next to you will be empty. And we're just going to put your food on that. So you can all that, you've got to spend at least £10 on food and we're just going to put it on the table. They're like pizzas, £10.

Do you want a pizza? Here's a pack of Skittles. We're going to put it right here on this table. Counts as a meal. And then there's live music on and people are dancing, but you had to dance at your table. You could, it was fucking insane. We started, have a word, January, 2020,

COVID hits and like they start lockdown. So as a joke on an episode, we said, if we get locked down, we'll do an episode every day. Like while we're locked down, they lock us down and all listeners, and we only had like 2000 listeners at the time, which is fucking nothing but they all went right so we're doing this every day and that's where we started to snowball from because there was a we did an hour long show every day for two months and also people being locked down and this is going to be studied for four years because right now we're still at the

part where people don't even want to talk about it no like don't bring it up i don't want to go back there don't bring it up but what's't want to go back there. Don't bring it up. But what's interesting about that is what it did socially for everyone around the world was people were forced to be isolated, but we have these supercomputers and the internet. So you didn't have to be completely isolated. So it was like isolation in a different way

where you were like, oh, I can watch this show. And then people got into it. On a day-to-day basis though, so we're like, you're doing topical stuff about things that happened overnight. It got bigger and bigger and it's now, it's done really well. We've done arenas with it in the UK.

It's awesome. Like Dan, Dan, who's my co-host, he's been doing stand-up 20 years and he never really got any sort of break, but he was always like, every comic always looked up to Dan. Love it. Especially in like the North West. I love a Dan that's underrated. I see you Dan. You guys have to meet. He's class and he's always been a great crowd work comic but

it never really like he sort of missed the boat of crowd work like clips and stuff. Sure. He can now tour off the back of a word. And I can't remember why we started talking about it. Oh, but so you do Edinburgh. Yeah. And now you get all those special little click bars or like you walk in and they're like, I have an idea for us.

It's so fun, but it's not even just, it's not even just like the industry people. Sure. It's the comics. Well, you were talking about this in the beginning, and I know a lot of times on this show, we try to avoid comedy talk because now comedy talk is like on every podcast

because what has happened is the industry has been eroded. Yeah. It's been destroyed. Yeah. Because now you just go straight to consumer. So now we're like performers, but also little mini agents. And like we have this like part of our brain that's like, I've got a great concept. Let's talk business.

And people are watching this at work. And I think this is a through line to what you're saying about why Have Word Took Off, and also why podcasts are popular, is people are at work and they want something else to do. So they want to listen to us talk. Yeah. And it's like, we're lucky. We're, we're very lucky that we just get to bullshit and like hang out and make fun of sweat under our tits. And people go like, yeah, I've had, I've had tits.

I got it right now. Yeah. Sit in the office. I got tits wet. But it is, now? Yeah, sit in the office, I got tit sweat. But it is, I think that's part of the reason why I have Word blew up was because people were going, well now my friends Adam and Dan are there and I can listen to them every day. Yeah. And they're funny.

Who doesn't wanna hang out? You know, I've always thought this is, comics are the luckiest, not because we're like, truth tellers and fucking gay, no, no, no. We are idiots that would have been fired at any other job. But we got to do the thing that would have gotten us fired at any other job. You find a way to make your sort of complete

an aptitude for life. Yeah, dude, when someone's like, you suck, I go, yeah, man. Yeah, get in line. If you think I don't think that, like, fuck it. There's a comic I seen get heckled like on one of his clips. And he said to the audience, like, you can't say anything to me. I haven't said six inches from the mirror. That's so funny. That's so funny.

I relate to that so much. I relate to that so much where people are like, I have, I've been actively in therapy learning on how to take in compliments. That's my problem. That's how to fuck a comic book That's my problem. My problem is like- That's how to fuck a comic book. Like compliment them from the audience. Yeah, you'll fuck me up.

You're doing great. I'll be like, ugh. Yeah, but you also can't like, it's still annoying. You suck. You can't do anything about it. You feel like Bane when you're like, you suck. And you're like, I was born in this.

This is the reason I'm here. It's surprising that I've only had a good relationship in my 40s. It's because it took me years to have to take shit in. Because it is. And that's why I think like, um... And then Indianapolis, July 18th through the 20th. I will be at Helium Comedy Club in Indy for five shows.

Buy tickets right now. July 25th through July 27th. I'm going to be at the Addison Improv outside of Dallas. Hypochondriacs rejoice. If you are worried about yourself physically all the time, you're like me and you're just worried you're dying and you need to go see a doctor but that creates too much pressure, well buddy do I have something for you. ZocDoc.

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therapy very important. I do it weekly. I probably need it the rest of my life because I need someone to talk to. I need someone to bounce bits off of. Now, what I really do is I need people to tell me sometimes from different perspective what I'm feeling because you know you get caught up in your emotions you think something's one way it's great talking to a professional who will be like now that's actually not true and you're doing it because of this and then you feel better about yourself and the situation so if you're thinking about certain therapy give better help a try entirely online you don't have to go to a weird office and see people you

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I mean, we were just talking about this. I saw a story, you know, furries? Like people like dress up like furries. This story came out in the Daily Mail about a furry convention in Seattle in 2015. It's big hotel. Yeah. And they went nuts. They thought they were just going to be like these cute people dressed like dogs and foxes and they were like breaking toilets, breaking the hot tub. People were shitting in the pool. But my argument for that is clearly someone was into the role.

The argument for that is, clearly someone was into the role. That's what they thought. They think they're an animal. Yeah, because people, everyone who's opened that hotel has gone, oh, it's just people who dress up as animals. No, no, no, no. They think they're animals. They want to be trans species. They want to be, I'm a dog.

I am a giant cartoon seal, and I'm going to eat fish in your pool. That's what I'm going to do. What would a giant cartoon seal and I'm gonna eat fish in your pool. Yeah. What would a giant cartoon seal do? What are you doing? I'm shitting the pill. Yeah. Where? Where? I'm a seal. And I'm the bad guy. And I'm the fucking bad guy. Literally at the reception told you I'm a seal.

Yeah. You saw me with my seal head holding it like a fucking, like a race car helmet. I'm an f1 I fucking love all those people you know yeah I love it so much I wish I was into it I I would I'd love to pretend to be into it just for a while and see how far you can get it because that is someone doing that but someone the second someone tried to fuck me the second I saw a real dick come through that little fur hole I'm like gearing up, you know? I used to play football.

I think you just want a Halloween party. That's it, I just want to go to a Halloween party. I've spoken about this on our show so many times. I have such a fetish for Halloween costumes. Really? I don't know what it is. Like obviously if it's like a super, like it's a properly scary one,

but any sort of like sluttiness, slutty. That's like your thing. It's, ah. From your whole life? The whole life and it's getting worse. Oh, and also here's the best part. This is where money becomes a problem. Yeah.

Because now you're like, I can buy a real nurse costume. I can buy an actual, do you remember how old you were when you first started? I think it's my entire adult life. You know what I'm like, lingerie does fuck all for me. Yeah, but if a girl dresses up as like, Little Red Riding Hood, good night. It's the best thing that she could do.

Yeah. Like, it's weird, cause it's definitely a fucking me issue. I have so many little icks that like, I don't like earrings. Like if a girl's got earrings in, it takes like two points. Like if she's an eight, she's now a six. And I know, I know it's me. What a weird thing to be like, I need purity of earlobes. That's such a pure, that's honestly,

I'm going to tell you that I'm not trying to shame you. You're in a safe space. It's the only time I've ever heard that thing. I know. Don't like. I tell it to people like that. Everyone looks at me like you just did. like are you speaking fucking Chinese like what like no one understands, but I'm gonna. I'm gonna try to reach you I'm gonna try to reach across the aisle and tell you I When when a woman's too done up yeah a lot of guys like women that wear a lot of makeup or whatever I don't like that no I like plain face

I love what my fiance has no makeup on and I think that's why I think that ties into the earring thing. And I think that's why like lingerie. It's too fancy for you. It's not just too fancy. It's too like it's like contrived. Yes, it's like stripper energy. It's too much like we're about to fuck. And it's like I'd rather you walk in in like my t-shirt. Yeah.

Because then I'm like, I'm fucking good here. I get it. You see a tip move in in like my t-shirt. Yeah. Because then I'm like, I'm fucking good here. I get it. Like you see a tip move in one of your t-shirts and you're like. The best thing in the world. You're like, I know that shirt. The little red riding hood outfit is like so far, so far past lingerie. I think it's ridiculous. That's why you like it.

It's because because you know why? I don't think I don't think I could take a chef seriously if you wore one of those hats. You know? If he was like, I'm about to make you a meal. I'd be like, this is a fucking boyardee over here. But if there was like a guy in like an apron, but like a rock and roll shirt or whatever, I'd be like, these tacos are about to fucking rip.

They're going to be fucking insane. Yeah. And I kind of get that. You want the casual while also inferring that it's going to happen. What's your favorite Halloween costume? I mean, like sexually. Yeah, get it out there, dude. I wanna know.

Like, I mean, like in that sort of context, I don't think you can really beat French made. I think it is. French made. I think it's the best one. Do you think this goes back to just the imperialism of, does this go back to England versus France? You're giving me so much Crip Mocha

I didn't even deserve this. I'm looking for something, cause I'm trying to find- I just love, also like any sort of like A-line skirt, like a skirt that like comes out from the hips and- Brother, I get it. Like a tennis skirt. I was just gonna say,

I don't know what it is, but a white tennis skirt with white tennis shoes, I'm like a cartoon. I'm like, brr. It's like tan legs. Good night. I'll run through a wall.

There'll be an imprint of my body through the wall. But I get that because I think what it is is lingerie is so forced. It's so like, hey, look, here's the straps and the fucking the lace. I'm not good enough for lace. You know what I mean? This is definitely such a self confidence thing.

I haven't earned this. I haven't earned lace? That's too nice. What you got some regular cloth? You got some cotton? Another one for me, and I think this goes back to the cash is like sports merch on a girl. Oh my God, my, you know, there's nothing more attractive.

My fiance is into sports. She's from Boston. Yeah. And she- She Liverpool fan? What's that? She's a huge Liverpool fan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Huge Liverpool fan. We had a, we had a couple,

oh, there he is, he fell. I'm Mo. Yeah, we had Mo up here. He's probably going in the summer. Is he? I think so. Yeah, but she went over there and like did a whole Liverpool tour.

She was mad when your guys coached the German guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He just left. He's leaving in the summer, yeah. Yeah, she was really. I'm gonna cry when he goes. Really? I know that's so sad.

I love that. No, dude, because I'm so gay for sports. That I love. But back to what we're saying, the non-gay part. She will be like, right now the Boston Bruins are in the NHL playoffs, right? So she'll be on the couch in like, you know,

casual sweats and like a Bruins jersey. Yeah. And I'll come around the corner and be like, yeah, it's a lease. She has this Celtic shirt. Fuck linger right there. She wears this Larry Bird Celtic shirt. And I'm like, what are we doing?

Are we doing this? Because it is, I don't know what it is. It's like, you know what it is? I think it's, for me at least, it's like a way to be like, oh, we can hang out. And also I'm attracted. It's just like, look at us. I don't know what it is, but like,

I've never had anyone like you go, yeah. No, I get it. So I've told like the other lads on our show and Carl, and he's like, I just think it's like a bit like, that's what men wear. Like men wear those things. Carl's not wrong. You're attracted to men.

I'm like. It is a little gay, but it's a little gay in the straightest way possible. It's like, it's like impossible gay. You know how they, instead of impossible meat, you know, this is all vegetables. You know, so you think it's dick, but it's pussy. You're blown away.

Like, fuck it. I did it. I think it just comes down to that's what like I was talking to Carl about this. This is going to sound incredibly sexist, but I'm going to say it anyway. Like if you, if I could choose to be attracted to men, I think I would. Do you know what I mean? It's my favorite Greg Geraldo joke of all time.

He goes, gay is a choice. He goes, I would choose it every time. Oh, you, you tell me everything I say would be interpreted and taken the way I meant it to be. It's like one of my favorite Geraldo jokes. I think just the sportsman is just, it's a little nod to that. It is.

It is. It's a little, and it is a little gay. But you know what? It's straight gay. It's straight gay. Because you're admitting it. Yeah. Because the ones that get in trouble are the ones that are like,

no, no, no, that's ill, ill. And then they just, like, but I think, hear me out, I think lingerie is gayer. It is? It's frilly. It's underbred. I mean, lingerie, what am I?

What am I, some sexy Spanish guy? Get the fuck out of here. It really is such a low confidence thing that you're like, ah, fuck dudes. I'm only good enough for dudes. But it makes sense because I always felt like, and I just said that, like when women are dolled up or whatever, I'm like, hey, I'm not worth that. I think it was kind of like that feeling of like,

It's just too much for me. You're too dressed up. I'm an arrogant piece of shit. So I've got the same thing as you, but I think it's for different reasons. I think we're two sides of the same coin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're like, we're both feeling it. I was like, well, you don't need to do that for me. What are you doing? Yeah. Stop trying to impress me.

Yeah, yeah, that's what it is. And I'm like, I don't need all that. Wipe your face. Yeah. Put the most alleges on the city. If you're dressed like a nurse, good night. Has there been a time where you've seen someone you've known dressed up like a woman, dressed up in a Halloween costume

and it's changed your perspective of her? No. Like a friend and then she's like oh I gotta go to this Halloween party I'll stop by and she's little red riding hood and you're like what are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? I think I mean the the answer is no I've never had that happen, but it would, but also I'd probably already like, be like, I would, I would anyway. But the Alphys, the cherry on the cake. But it could heighten it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it probably would take someone who'd be like a complete

like platonic, nothing from like- And I'm not saying in a way that you'd pursue it. I'm just saying in a way that you go, oh, all right. I've seen girls put their hair in ponytails and you're like, what? And you just like, this is the moment where you're like. Are you a ponytail guy? Just like, but the idea is because it infers a blow job.

And you're like, oh, OK. And it'll just catch it. Having a dick, it's just like catching a random case. You just get to get a random boner sometimes from stuff that you're like, didn't expect that to happen. Didn't know it was gonna be this. Yeah, and you go, oh fuck it, and then am I into this? I mean, that's like how you find out

about the Halloween costumes. Is it just once you go, okay, once, and then it's second, and you go like, what? Oh no, it's all of them. The first time you think it's just that costume, and then when you look around the room, you're like, oh no, it's literally every- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, fuck, oh, fuck. On the sports thing, costume and then like when you get it like you look around the room you're like oh no it's literally

oh fuck oh fuck on the sports thing because i know what you were saying before about like it's like you can hang out and you can have shared interests and stuff we're talking about this recently uh me mate there is a limit to that though which is me mate was like could you be could you date a girl could you be with a girl and like be together if she like loved the football, like the soccer, like as into football as you are. And I was like, I think that is my line. I'd like her to, I'd like her girl to like it. They like watching it, but they don't really care as much as I do. See, I disagree. I disagree. I think once you experience it, it's crazy because it's like, um, like she's not sitting on the couch being like, yeah, bro.

But she knows names better than I, cause she worked for ESPN. She worked for Fox sports, but she knows shit. Well, she'll be like, Oh, that guy played here. She's better with names. I'm so stupid. Totally different. I think that's totally different. What I'm talking about is like, yeah, bro. And you're like, yeah. and also like if I came home and I we have a different way of it but if I was like come in and my girl was sat on the couch watching like la liga she's watching like Spanish football I think you would I think I think on paper you think it would suck but in actuality you'd have to see the energy of it because big j used to make fun of me all the time Katie worked for Apple she was in the booth for baseball games,

Friday night baseball. And we'd be watching some random TV show and she'd be like, all right, I gotta go watch this guy. He's pitching on Wednesday and I gotta go scout him. And J said, you're the only relationship I've ever seen where the girl leaves to go watch baseball. Where she's like- No, but that's a job that is sexy.

But that's also her, she's also into that. Like she, I'll come home and she'll have baseball on during the day. She doesn't work for them anymore. And she'll come home and be like, oh yeah, the Orioles are playing the day game and we'll sit down and watch baseball. And you're like, this is fucking sick. Yeah, no, I do. But I understand what you're saying because I think you're afraid that they're going to be

like, diken out, being like, what's up, bro? What's up, this fucking guy? And a lot of times it's like, that kind of energy doesn't, she knows how crazy I am about the 49ers. Because we've talked about this, unlike the 49ers, the way you are with Liverpool. So she'll know, but what's great about it is, she'll be like, what time the Niner's on?

About like four o'clock, and she'll be like, she just knows where I've dated, where the opposite problem of this is where I've dated where the opposite problem of this is I've dated women that don't get it. And so they go like, you're, you're upset about a football game and you're like, they lost to the fucking Seahawks. Why don't you get that? And she'll be like, like the NFC championship game this year, when we were losing to the giant, to the lions, we were down by like 21 points at halftime and I was yelling. And at one point, what's great about her

knowing sports is at one point I go, this is the loudest I'm going to yell. This is the most upset I'm going to be. And she started laughing because she knew she's like, I know where you're at as a sportsman, we just watched the Maple Leafs Bruin series that went seven. Yeah, she's going nuts. I mean, nuts. And I was there to be the voice of reason. Yeah, because's going nuts. I mean nuts and I was there to be the the voice of reason Yeah, cuz I know I'm just getting into hockey now

Yeah, and so I'm like now I'll watch and they scored I was like that's good And she was she did the thing where she's like if I watch it's bad luck And so she's in the hallway listening and they scored And it was like it was it so I get what you're saying where you're worried about them being too into it, but I'm telling you when you find a woman that is it fucking rules because it's an understanding. I just think there's a line for me. Like I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've days of girls who don't care and they've

tried to do the funny, like it's just a game. And I'm like, I'll kill you. Like, I'll kill you. Like. I'll tie stones to you and you'll go in the sea. Like, I'm not a violent man, but it's within me somewhere and I'll kill you in your sleep. Like fucking shut up. It's obviously not just a game.

Cause I'm nearly in tears. I have an emotional attachment and you wonder why I'm broken emotionally. Follow this line. And I've also, I dated one girl and she was great. It didn't work out for whatever reason, but she like, like she was a Liverpool fan. She wasn't like me. She's just like, you know, I want them to win.

It's great when they do whatever. And she understood what like so this was last season. Like so maybe like 18 months ago, I'm seeing this girl and Liverpool applying terribly awful all season. Yeah. And we played Manchester United, which is always just that that game still matters, even if you're gonna finish mid table in the Premier League. Man U and Man City, they're like the, they're the kids that you just wanna beat no matter what. Well, Man City now, because of like what's become of them,

but the oldest rivalry is Liverpool and United. So that game is the biggest game of the year, every year, no matter what's going on. And I've been ill, like really ill all week. And when I'm ill, I'm the biggest bitch you've ever met, right? So like me and the girl I was seeing, we lived apart. But for that week, I was in her apartment.

She was like, you're not well. Do you want me to look after you? I'm like, yeah. I'm a baby. So like, she's literally like stroking me hair to sleep and she's making me tea and soup. Like Liverpool play Man United and I'm watching it on her couch. Right. And I've got like a blanket over me and I'm just sat there going and with dog shit.

And I felt like Man United for the first seven years were going to beat us. And Liverpool won that game seven nil. Right. Like, which is just such an anomaly to the season. Slaughtering. We go one nil up in the first half and the first half was only one nil a half time. The other six goals are all the second half. So at one nil I'm like,

fucking hell we might win this game. And we go two nil up, three nil up. And I'm just getting like slowly less ill as the game goes on. Yeah, it's rising your spirit. The blanket's up. We go four nil up and I go, if we go five nil up,

I said I'm going the pub. she's like you can't go to the pub you've been violently at all, you're gonna make yourself worse. I was like if we go five nil and then we go five nil she goes you're not going to the pub. I went right if we get six I'm going the pub and we go six nil up and I'm jumping around their apartments I've got this energy from nowhere and she's like I really don't think you should go to the pub just stay and watch the end of the game and I was like right I'll watch the end of the game. And I was like, right, I'll watch the end of the game. And the second, the seventh goal winning, she just handed me my jacket. It's beautiful.

She understands. That's perfect. But she understood. That's perfect. But if I came home and like, she's watching like a foreign, if she's like, I'm waiting on Barcelona for me parlay to come in. I can't. Well, that's too much.

I can't. That's too much. If I came home and she was watching like, you know, SEC college football, and she's like, I just really think Tennessee is going to turn it around this year. I'd be like, that's fucking, that's too much. If I came home and she was watching like, you know, SEC college football, and she's like, I just really think Tennessee is gonna turn it around this year, I'd be like, that's fucking, that's a lot. It's just too much. The Niners made the Super Bowl this year. I watched it.

And I got horrifically sick, same situation. Michael Che got me a ticket, and Shane was out there doing Bud Light stuff. So Shane goes, you can stay in my hotel. I got a hotel room for you. But I got, one of the sickest I've been in stuff. So Shane goes, you can stay in my hotel. I got a hotel room for you. But I got this, one of the sickest I've been in over 10 years. And Katie was like, you're gonna make the Super Bowl?

And I was like, I'm gonna make the fucking Super Bowl. And I, two days before the Super Bowl, kick out of it, I start feeling better. She gets crazy sick. And so then I'm like, oh no. That's worse than you being sick. I know. And I'm going like, I'm like packing my bag,

talking to her, I'm like, it's real bad. I'm bringing her soup and stuff. You're like, so you're real bad? And she got it. And she was like, just go. But the whole time I was there, I was like, fuck. You're rubbing it back with your right hand and folding your jersey with the left.

I'm checking to see the weather that day. Like, yeah, yeah, it's tough, it's tough. Shane's like, you coming here? I'm like, I'm on my way, buddy, don't worry. That's the best time to have a girlfriend like yours. Yeah, cause she got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Any other woman would have ended it right there.

And then like, you're going and I'm like, and by the way, I went to the Super Bowl and they lost and I was like, fuck, fuck. I could have boyfriend points. The thing is though, if I was with a girl, like the only equivalent I suppose of the Super Bowl in Europe is the Champions League final. Sure.

Cause obviously the league system is, there's no final. Whoever wins the league. It's all on points, right? Yeah, but there's three cup competitions every year. So there's the league cup, which is always sponsored. So like this year it's the Carabao Cup, which is an energy drink. And then there's the FA cup, which is never sponsored, but it is, but the name never dominates it. That's another one you want to win. That's only played with English teams.

The champions league is all the best teams in Europe. It's like, yeah, it's everybody. If Liverpool got to a champions league final, which we often do, that's Liverpool have like a good. You did it, I think the first year I met you, you were just coming off of one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, very possible. You went, you went to the EuroLeague final, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I went to the one in Paris in 2022 maybe, maybe, I'm not sure.

I think it might have been 2021 because I think I might have just seen you right after that. No, it was definitely 2022. But like, so we've been three in recent memory. So we will have been to another one that I didn't go to. I will have just watched it at home. But like, I've now got to the point career wise, where if we're in a final, I will pay what it takes to go. There is no illness or deflection

that my partner could have, where I wouldn't be going to that game. Yeah, it's kind of in a way how I felt about the Super Bowl. I was like, listen, also I was in such a nice place where all I had to pay for was a flight. I had the ticket taken care of and the hotel was taken care of. That's just impossible to turn down. And you're like, I gotta go. And also playing the team that beat us that I went to in

2019 when we lost to the Chiefs, where I was like, it's a revenge game. I gotta go. And then they lost twice. And that's why I've made the promise to 49er fans, I will never go to another 49er Super Bowl again. I will always watch at home. Dude, I'm not, I'm not ruining that again. I need them to win another one. I'll watch them win at home. And also it just sucks It just sucks losing and then traveling home losing the Champions League final in 2022 was so It was so bad. I was on a podcast PM Pardon my take with big cat and he nailed it said the travel home Yeah, and also the travel so there was a lot of trouble. So I went to the one in Paris. The final was in Paris.

It was Liverpool against Madrid. But there was a lot of trouble before the game because of the French police are cunts. Like they're the biggest cunts. And they completely, like all the locals, because the final wasn't played at the stadium that's in Paris. It's in Saint-Denis, which is just north of the city. And it's a ghetto. Like it's... So all it has is the stadium that's in Paris, it's in Saint-Denis, which is just north of the city. And it's a ghetto like it's it's it's it's.

So it's all it has is the stadium and then it's just like a bad. Limit. Yeah, it's a really, really bad idea of the country. And there's like locals like jumping the gates and like getting in and pushing past security and stuff. So then they just shut all the gates. But then there's 40,000 Liverpool fans with tickets. So the game got delayed, I think it was by an hour. Like they never delayed football games ever.

It was delayed by an hour because they were still getting- Because no one could get in? No one could get in. And the French police are going, what do you want me to do? Yeah, I'm tear gassing people, tear gassing kids. These people are happy, go for the fence, maybe you should talk to them.

It was horrific. And I only got away with, I missed being in the trouble because I got so lucky. So I was there with Alfie, who's another comic who he opens for me on Tour of the Moon. He's phenomenal comic, Alfie Brown. One of my best mates from Skilled, Josh, and Alfie's brother.

And we went to the fan park in the afternoon and watched like the Liverpool, like musicians and stuff singing in the park. And then we leave and everyone's walking. It's gonna be like an hour walk to the stadium, but everyone's walking together. And we're drooling. And you guys sing those songs together.

You guys have such camaraderie. It's class. It's like way different. Football, we just go like, Niners, Niners! But you guys sing songs where you're like, and the river bends down. You guys have fucking, you guys have whole songs.

So I went to a Liverpool game recently with an American, actually Shelby, who sort of was part of who arranged for me to come here. Shelby's great, she like works with Steve, does all our business side of the podcast. And she's the one who said, oh, do you want to go and do Dan's thing while you're over? She got four tickets to a Liverpool game.

So she brought her colleague and took me and Dan. And I'd have been there anyway, I would have just been in a different seat. But she was at a game that you would like, the fact that it lined up for her to be at that one. So there was a tragedy in 1989 with Liverpool fans. Liverpool played in an FA Cup semi-final in Sheffield. So back then the semi-finals of that competition

were played at a neutral ground rather than the national stadium. As they played in Sheffield against Nottingham Forest and the Yorkshire police completely fucked the day up. There was two pens that were supposed to have Liverpool fans in. They only opened one. They put all of the fans that were meant to be in

both into one and 96 people on the day died and a 97th died years later as a result of his injuries. Every year the game nearest to that tragedy, there's a minute silence and also Liverpool's anthem, the song that everyone sings is you'll never walk alone. And it's just sung a little bit different that day. And that was the game Shelby got tickets to. So Shelby had no sort of experience of like British sports. So she went to the saddest one. She basically went to their 9-11 game. Yeah, yeah, literally.

And she witnessed a perfectly observed minute silence followed by you'll never walk alone. A completely sold out hand feel. And an emotional. She's just the next bit. At one point she goes, everybody knows all of the words. I've completely sold out on feel and an emotional. She's just the next one. She goes, everybody knows all of the words. Yeah, that's that.

I mean, there's a great documentary 30 for 30 on the on that tragedy that happened that I watched that you're just like, it's insane how much they fucked up. And like it's people were crushed. Yeah, like they were crushed by a crowd but it is it is nuts because you never think of going to another country their tragedy that maybe you don't know about like if like if a you know a British football fan came over here and the the Jets were because I think this year they played like near 9-eleven it's when Rogers ran out with the American flag yeah you're gonna see an emotion where you're like holy shit yeah these people Because I think this year they played like near 9-eleven. It's when Rogers ran out with the American flag. Yeah

You're gonna see an emotion where you're like, holy shit Yeah, these people are gonna run. So just going over there and be like, oh fuck everyone's super bombed out People people are like crying because like that they all lost there's people who lost relatives and distant and close relatives at this thing And there's never really been justice served for it. I mean like it's not at this thing and there's never really been justice served for it. Do you know what I mean? Like it's not like there'll be British listeners to your podcast now who are fans of other teams, especially if they're like rival teams will be like, oh, he's talking shit. Like it was the Liverpool fans fault. It wasn't.

There's been loads of investigations into it. And that's also that shows you the level of sports fandom where it's just like a horrific tragedy, but even your rivals are go, it was their fault. Yeah. Oh, but like, like, like a man, you fan goes, all right, we got it. We have fuck it. You know, you're like guys. They sing about it.

Really? Like they're trying to ban it. And like everyone who sings about it now will get ejected from stadiums and banned for life. Wait, they have a song about it? You guys do diss tracks about fucking sports strategy? It's called Tragedy Chantin. So Man United have got their own tragedy as well.

And there's definitely Liverpool fans who are guilty of singing about that. So- It's fucking wild, dude. Man United had an airplane crash in 1958 in Muner, right? Where the runway was too icy. So their plane went to take off and it crashed. And what would have been one of the greatest teams

in history? Like they died, like their players died. We had that with Marshall University and they made a movie, a horrible movie with Matthew McConaughey in it. Yeah, and like fans will sing at Manchester United, like Munich 58. And they have a song about it.

Like they'll go Munich 58, Munich, Munich 58, and like if that's a Liverpool, and a lot of Liverpool fans, most Liverpool fans when they hear that will go Shut the fuck up and it's the same with all the fan groups when they sing at Liverpool fans about Hillsborough Which is where it happened the majority of other fan bases will be like what the fuck you doing? Yeah, have a little class the the ultra fans will sing The one that gets leveled at Liverpool all the time is always the victims, it's never your fault.

Fucking wild. That is so wild that that's the- And they're trying to like, they're trying to get away. If you're on camera singing it, that you'll then be banned for life from all football because it's like, they're trying to completely rule out- But it's so crazy to me that it's a song. Cause I feel so silly singing,

but to sing something mean if I was like, Seahawks, you fucking pussies. And I'd be like, you can't do that. I'd be like, mass shooting in Washington. And they'd be like, how could you fucking bring that up? It'd be fucking nuts. It's just nuts that the it's it's so like, it kind of shows the old world tendencies of like, oh, but if it's done in song, it's not really that. It is like totally different to the American chant. I went to Liverpool, we're in the FA Cup final, same year, 22, I think.

Yeah. And Shane was over. Yeah. And he did our podcast and he says to me afterwards, he's like, oh, I'm going to the Cup final at the weekend. Are you going? And Shane was over. Yeah. And he did our podcast. And he says to me afterwards, he's like, Oh, I'm going to the Cup final at the weekend. Are you going? And I was. And he was like, Oh, I've got a ticket in the Chelsea. And obviously he doesn't really give a shit.

He's like, I just got a ticket in the Chelsea. And I was like, well, before the game, just meet me and come to the Liverpool pubs, because it's not like over here, the segregation. It's like before a Cup final, like the fans, like both clubs will be like by the local council, they will be given like Chelsea, these are the pubs your fans are allowed to drink in and don't go to the Liverpool ones and Liverpool. These are the pubs.

You're on that side and you're on that side and don't go near each other. So I said to Shane, I know you've got a Chelsea ticket, just don't wear anything Chelsea, not that he would have and just come to the Liverpool side. And he's just watching this sea of red, like just sing like pregame. Unbelievable. After the game. Are there still goons? Are there still like people that meet up in like,

Oh yeah, like hooligans. Hooligans. That's what it's called. Yeah. There's like hooligans where you like meet. There was that movie they did about like just, they just meet up and fight. There's football factory. There's green street. Green street. They made a movie about green street. The guy who wrote green streets, his brother's a comic. Really? Yeah. Yeah. So I forget the guy who wrote green street. They say his name is Brimson. Eddie Brimson is a comic and Eddie used to be a hooligan.

And so these guys, do they fight and then go to the game or do they just fight? Often after the game. Great. Yeah. Cause if you lost, you fired up. I would almost be like, if we won, I wouldn't want to be a hooligan that day.

I'd be like, we just gonna celebrate the win? It's a fucking good win. I nearly got involved, not that I was going to be a hooligan, but I nearly got caught in a crossfire of it. Like when I was like 17. And now how do they do that? Do they like reach out to the other hooligan group and they're like this street, this time? Like the head, like the, I don't know a lot about it because I've never been

properly involved with it, but from what I know, there's the head guy of each firm, they're called firms rather than gangs. There's a head of each firm. And then they'll have like a side guy who's like, right, you organize it and I'm the leader sort of thing. It's- That's so funny. They have a secretary. Yeah. Okay. There's a 3pm work for you.

Okay. But they'll arrange like where to meet and they'll track. They'll just beat the shit out of each other. But they, there's like a sort of, you know, there's a like an honor to it where they won't beat up just out of each other. But they there's like a sort of, you know, there's a like an honor to it where they won't beat up just a fan of the opposition team. They have to be coming out. They want to fight the people who want to fight. Yeah. But we nearly got caught.

I went to I was 17. And at the time I worked in McDonald's. Yeah. And a term he made to I work with called Nevin and Tony. And we went to Leeds away. We went to the Leeds away game and Leeds Stadium, the away fans car park where all the coaches park is maybe a 15 minute walk from the stadium. So after the game, you've got to walk from the stadium

for 15 minutes to get on the coach to get home. And on the way back, me mate Tony, and he's a good lad, but he's got a fucking mouth on him. Do you mean? And we're walking back towards the thing. And we're kids. Yeah, I mean, and he's a good lad, but he's got a fucking mouth on him. Do you know what I mean? And we're walking back towards the thing, and we're kids, do you know what I mean? And we're not paying attention to our surroundings. And he just goes, I fuck with eight leads,

it's a shit hole, and I'm never coming back. And we're just there from behind us, we'll don't fucking come back then. There's about- Oh, is there a moment where you hear that and you go, fuck. Oh, I've never shit myself more. You go, oh, fuck man, come on. Because we've inadvertently walked to where they'd arranged to meet so they now think what we got so lucky because there was maybe

30 40 of them. Oh my god. That's who was behind you and there's three of us Oh fuck, but we got we got just close enough to where the Liverpool fans were waiting for them That like we got away and way and like we just watched them. So the Liverpool guys were like, come on, get off. They were like, get out the way, yeah. What? Were you just driving back like, oh I fucking hate Leeds, oh fuck Leeds.

You fucking almost got us killed, Tony. God damn it, Tony. He was like, oh I fucking hate him. If you'd have said it 200 yards earlier, we'd have been fucked. They would have stomped your ass out. Probably. You would have been appetizers. would have stomped your ass out. Probably. You would have been appetizers.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they'd wait and they'd be like, oh, we got fucking riled up. We fucked up some young Liverpool fans. Yeah, we'd have been fucked. Damn, that is nuts. Yeah. I had a thing recently, like we went to a Niners Seahawks

game, which is a rivalry, but nothing like that. And we were leaving for Niners one, and we're like leaving, and the Seahawks fan. Just so you know, before you carry on, Leeds Liverpool is not a big rivalry. So they were just going to fight. That's so funny. That's so funny.

That's like the Niners playing the Browns and you're like, yeah, we're going to fight. Yeah, yeah, literally. That's fucking wild. But I've saw it with our fans where there, someone was talking shit to Seahawks fans and they're like, dude, stop, what are you doing? And the guy was like, fuck you.

And you're like, yeah, you're an asshole. Last time I was here, I went to watch the Rangers play. I just love sports. While we've been here this weekend, we went to see the Yankee game yesterday. I can't believe how empty it was. It was so, it was maybe- Well, it's also May.

So it was May and once it starts heating up, once it, baseball, it's so much. It's not like football where it's once a week or even basketball where it's once it starts heating up once it gives baseballs so much it's it's not like football where it's once a week or even basketball where it's like yeah it's like you can get tickets cheap you can get tickets to any games but you start looking in after the all-star break that's where everything changes okay they do the all-star break after that is where playoff it starts becoming real yeah and then you know if it's if it's like let's say the Red Sox and the Yankees are heating up, you go to one of those games in August and it's full.

It's full no matter what. I just couldn't believe it, especially because like when I went to get the tickets, I said to Carl, I was like, right, the tickets range from $19 to like 400. Yeah, 400 if you want to sit behind home base. Literally, so I went, what do you want to pay? And he goes, let's just pay like 150. We'll get good seats, but not yeah, that's what we did

But yesterday I was like we could have paid 19 and just walk no one checked our seats We could have gone anywhere what sucks is when they do check your seats you feel like an asshole We feel like an asshole cuz like I grew up going to Denver Nuggets games in Denver where they were horrible And you would buy tickets at the top and you'd be able to sit courtside or at least close to the court by the third quarter because they didn't care. They were just like, go ahead. But now if I buy a Nuggets ticket, it's going to cost me a lot of money and I'm going to be up because they're good.

Because they're good? Yeah, they're good. Teams, that's America. Once you're good, everybody loves you, baby. It's not a million miles away from that in the UK. The only difference is like in the Premier League, with one or two, maybe three exceptions, every game is sold out. That's nuts.

Like Liverpool can't win the league now. Like we're not gonna win it this year. There's two games left. One is away at Aston Villa. One is the last game of the season, which is Klopp's last game is at home against Wolves. You, unless you went to a tout and paid extra, One is the last game of the season, which is Klopp's last game is at home against Wolves You unless you went to a tout and paid extra like for reset. Yeah, you can't get a ticket. It's not possible You just have to know somebody nothing on the line really like well

It's also a big game because it might be Mo Salah's last game It might be totally but like even if that wasn't the case, you're not getting it You're not gonna take it from the club. Thanks for having us, love. Listen to Have a Word podcast. Check out Adam Standup. He is fucking hilarious. At Adam Rowe, R-O-W-E. So Instagram, which is the best one, is Adam Rowe comedian, R-O-W-E.

Adam Rowe comedian, and there's three specials on YouTube. There's Club Comic, which I shot at the Comedy Store in London, which is just two club sets from years ago. There's Imperious, which is the last tour. There's Juicy, which is the story, right? The story. Yeah. And then I'll have another one coming out in October

because I've just filmed it. Yeah, hell yeah. We'll see you when you come out here. Dude, you rule, man. Thanks so much. Nice one. Boom. Dude, that's... Dude that...