Soder - 48: Mean Middle Schoolers with Anthony Moore | Soder Podcast | EP 47

Episode Date: October 9, 2024

Support the Sponsors to Support THE SHOW! for our listeners. Right now get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription but only for our listeners - at Babbel.com/SODER Get up to 60% off at Babbel.com/SODER Rules and restrictions may apply. Babbel.com/SODER Get timeless looks with modern comfort from Mack Weldon. Go to MackWeldon.com and get 25% off your first order of $125 or more, with promo code DAN. That’s MackWeldon.com promo code DAN Stop wiping until you bleed. Join the 2 million butts who have already made the switch to TUSHY! For a limited time, our listeners get 10% off your entire order when you use code soder at checkout. That’s 10% off your order at Hellotushy.com with promo code soder Hellotushy.com code soder Dan is on the road all 2024! Get tickets @ https://www.dansoder.com/tour Oct 10 - 12 - Houston, TX Oct 17- 19 Salt Lake City Nov 8 - NYC Town Hall Nov 9 - Toronto, Canada Nov 14 -16 - Tampa,FL Nov 21 - 23 Homestead,PA Dec 6 - Chicago, IL Dec 7 - Milwaukee, WI DEC 12 - 14 Sacramento,CA Follow Anthony Moore https://www.instagram.com/allthatandmoore/ PLEASE Drop us a rating on iTunes and subscribe to the show to help us grow. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/soder/id1716617572 Connect with DAN Twitter: https://Twitter.com/dansoder Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dansoder Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dansodercomedy Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/dansoder Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/@dansoder.comedy #dansoder #standup #comedy #entertainment #podcast Produced by  @homelesspimp   https://www.instagram.com/thehomelesspimp/?hl=en

Houston, Texas. I will be at the Improv, the 10th through the 12th, doing five shows. And then Salt Lake City, October 17th through the 19th. And the big one, November 8th, Town Hall, New York Comedy Festival, 9.45, get tickets. And Toronto, we added a second show on November 9th. DanSoder.com for tickets. We'll see you there. Well, the Diddy stuff, it feels like they're just, once you get in that big of trouble, it feels like people just start throwing in extra shit to make you look worse.

Cannibalism, is that what you said? You heard cannibalism? Yeah, I'm just hearing that for the first time. You're hearing that too? What did they say, that he ate? No, I'm saying I'm just hearing this from him. They alleged that he would cater to any needs. Alleged.

That rich people had. That's funny. You gotta be, I'm trying, like, when there's nothing left for you to get a rise out of you besides cannibalism. I hope that was someone fucking with him. I did. Yeah.

I did just see, um, Will Smith was saying like, when you hit rock bottom, like he said, the opposite of that is like cliff top. So basically like you just run out of things that you could want. So I guess you do get to the point where you just want to eat somebody. Yeah. That's like the, that was always the theory of why Mick Jagger and David Bowie got caught having sex was that they had had sex with every woman. So they were both like, let's bang each other.

And you're like, well, that's just the end of the line for them. But you assume if you're a celebrity and you've gotten everything like your dopamine has been flooded with everything. Right. Adoration, wealth, all this stuff, like crazy shit that you can never dream of. Yeah. You'd be like, I want to eat somebody. Yeah. Let me just take this newborn.

Yeah. Let me get that adrenochrome. It's so funny because if it was like, if adrenochrome was real, they would market it, pharmaceutical companies would market it in a fucking second Have you do you watch regular TV anymore? Barely like put on like I put it on as like background But I'm like I'm watching a bunch of old stuff. Yeah, you watch like streaming stuff

Um, yeah, but like I'm watching like SVU. Yeah. Like I guess I'm watching sick stuff. Like I'm watching SVU. I'm watching a lot of First 48. Yeah. But if you watch any real TV, real TV that's on cable, all the commercials now are pharmaceuticals. Oh yeah, for sure. That's all they are. Everything is like, I just read something where a lot of ads are like HIV pills.

Yeah. That's all it is. Well now they're going basically like, we can keep you alive with anything. And you're like, this is fucking nuts. What happened to fruit snacks? What happened to soda commercials? Right, you don't, we're having a gushes. Yeah.

I wanted something I can pronounce, not endocelioma. And they're like, try binaural. And you're like, this is so fucked up. Everything is a commercial for something that, and as a hypochondriac, I'm finding out about these conditions that I didn't know to worry about. Like the eye stuff, like the bulging eye disease, I've been seeing that one all the time.

I forget what that's called. Wonk eyes is what we called it back in the day, where their eyes like protrude out of their head and they're like, now I'm clearing up. And they're like stepping through portals and talking shit. It's nuts, dude. It's fucking nuts. But I think that's all that like,

similarly to like how famous people get into like cannibalism, cause that's all that's left. That's like where we're at with commercials. They're like, all we're left is giving you these magic pills because you don't give a shit about it's cars and pharmaceuticals. That lets me know that like as you say this, I'm thinking I still got more work to do. Yeah. Cause I haven't been approached. I haven't been offered a person yet. Yeah. I mean, either. Yeah. My career is stalling, dude. I haven't been offered one human being sexually or edibly. That's how you got it.

You have to be offered a person. Do you want to fuck this person or eat this person? Or you know what? In that situation, when you do get there, you just can turn them down and go, thanks, I made it. Is that a call home kind of thing? Do you think you call home right? Kind of thing. Do you think you call home and go like hey mom, your boy did it?

I got off in a person. I spared them but I could have had them because you're such a good mom. I spared him. What would be the thing do you think that would make you call home to brag call home to brag that's like season one of tires is great yeah awesome job on it but even thank you but even that is weird because it's like I'm on this show is weird being on like a white show coming from a black family because a lot of people saw it but none of my family yeah god, yeah, yeah, yeah. God damn, I never thought about that.

If you would have been in a Madea movie, you wouldn't have been able to be alone at the holidays. Right, yeah. For your entire, and so they're like, what? Oh yeah, you're not on TV. I'm like, you could go watch it right now. Number one show on Netflix, and they're like, don't believe you.

No, no. That's so fucking funny. Are you still teaching? No, no, no's so fucking funny. Are you still teaching? No, no, no. When did you quit teaching? I quit a week before the shutdown. I quit a week before the pandemic. And it wasn't even because of COVID.

Really? It was because at that time, I was starting to get more college work. Sure. So I was calling out to work all the time, like maybe like once or twice a month, just to go on the road for a college gig. And I had to go away for a week in February,

because I had three college shows back to back. And then, basically, my supervisor said, next time I call out, they were going to let me go. So I had a college gig, I'll never forget, it was March 2nd, and I remember telling my supervisor, I remember telling another teacher, I was like, yeah, I'll never forget this, March 2nd. And I remember telling my supervisor, I remember telling another teacher, I was like, yeah, I don't know what to do. And she was like, just tell them you're sick.

Everybody getting sick right now. And this one, we heard of COVID, but nobody believed it. And I was- This one is still called Corona. Yeah, I was like, right. I forgot that was his original name. Yeah, it was like a party, it was a fun party. Yeah, that's like Cassius Clay.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's so funny. Yeah. COVID was its Muslim name. It's like, nah, Corona's the name of the suppressor. I give it my science name, COVID-19.

And yeah, the teacher, she was like, you just tell them you sick. Everybody's getting sick right now. And I was like, there's no way they're gonna believe that. Yeah, so I ended up quitting and then. So when you quit. I was actually, I was a no call no show. For teaching?

I was like, I worked one to one with a student. So I worked with a kid that had some type of behavior problems, intellectual disability. Damn, I'm just gonna tell you right now, you're the most dangerous teacher to call out. Right, yeah. You know, call no show, a kid with issues. Right. That kid's spinning.

He's like, I fucking knew it. I knew Anthony didn't like me. Yeah, like I was hoping, I was just praying that another one of my coworkers would be able to cover for me. Yeah. Which I just planned terribly. So they just like, let me go right then. Do you hear your students know that you're a comic?

Yeah, they found out after a while. How did they find out? Um, tick tock, tick tock. And look, they looked me up online. Yeah, they Googled me. That's I think. Yeah, but it was terrible. Because with them finding out they started commenting mean shit on my YouTube. So like I'm trying to build

some type of YouTube presence and it just made me not even want to post because I'm trying to build a YouTube presence but it's like as soon as I upload videos my kids are just telling me this is not funny and they're giving me thumbs down so it's they giving me dumb down. So it's just killing my algorithm totally. Were they vocal about it in person? Oh definitely. So you come to school and they'd be like,

yo fuck your YouTube. Because kids already don't respect teachers. Yeah no, never. It's like if you're not the principal, they don't care what you have to say. You're a CEO. You're basically, you're not the principal, they don't care what you have to say. You're a CEO. Yeah. You're basically, you're a babysitter.

Right, and so it's like, my position, I'm below everybody. Yeah. It's like, I'm below, it's like principal teachers, cafeteria workers, and then it's like me. Yeah. Yeah. So they didn't- You can't even tell them what's for lunch on Wednesday. Right, yeah.

You're just going like, hey, act right, and they're going like, I got something for you. No, but what I used to get them, dodgeball. Yeah. How good does that feel? That was my release. When they would tell you dodgeball was coming up, or you were like, yeah.

And I remember I got one kid good. She was running. She was. Yeah. I love this. Yeah, she was running along she was. Yeah. I love this. Yeah, she was like running along the wall. Yeah. And I just threw it like so like ahead

to where I knew she was going and it just landed perfect. Anticipation. Yeah. That should have been the lesson for the day. Yeah. You go, now you see, you wanna know how I do that? You wanna know why you heard that sweet tongue off her head? Was it one of those red balls?

Yeah, and it just like the way it just smacked, it was perfect. That noise of specifically those balls. Yeah, like I remember, it's funny, I remember how those balls smell. It, I just know how they sound, that like ting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They make such a rubber ting.

So when you get found out that you're a standup comic, did that make you want to change? Like, I'm just imagining being at school and then seeing my teacher do something else. Because I was younger, at high school, the internet was around, but barely. But if I saw one of my teachers at the store or out in public, I'd be'd be like damn they're a real person

but to see them trying to live a dream and and it was also too for me it was kind of like it was weird it was like the my grind in New York has been weird yeah we're like I went from doing LOL yeah to the seller that's insane well I for those of you that don't know, that's the comedy equivalent of playing single A carnival ball and then getting called up to like the Casey Royals, where you're just in the major leagues.

Yeah, so it would be nights where I'm at the cellar, doing like a 1230 spot, and then the next morning, I gotta go deal with these kids. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. That's gotta be, I don't, there's just probably a lot of jobs that have to suck to go back to. Right. Um, I know waiting tables. I remember one time I got to do a guest set for Louie in like 2010. And Nate Barghetti was hosting. And we were in the back watching Louie and I was watching one of the servers shovel ice to fill one of the bars.

And I go, that's crazy, I'm gonna be doing that in 10 hours. When right now I'm like standing against the wall having a beer watching Louie. And then like 10 hours later, I looked up at the clock and I was shoveling ice and I was like, almost called it. And it's that feeling where you're like, ah, it's Cinderella quickly going back to being before she finds the shoe.

It's like before the ball. You're like, you go right back to that. And if your kids know it and they're mean about it, oh man, did you ever almost lose your shit? Oh, a lot. On a kid, talking about your comedy? A lot, yeah. Really?

Cause that shit stinks. Cause you're an even keel guy. Right, and that shit stinks. Like kids, they know what to say to you that hurts, and it's like you gotta stay respectful the whole time. Yeah. And I almost got in trouble because it was one day I was going back and forth with them and they actually one of the students

recorded me, but I didn't know and they recorded me and luckily The the the principal just had to be on my side and told the students they shouldn't have had their phones out at the time Great. Yeah, that's the only way out of it. What were you getting? Where were you going back at it was? Um, Just telling them like they couldn't read. Yeah. I was told to be nice. Yeah. That does have to be nice when you can turn your skill against them. Right. Yeah. Like your mom didn't even want you. And they're like, oh, and you're like, yeah.

No. But I would see stuff like that a lot where these kids, because like this whole new generation of parents that lie to their kids. So I remember it was one day, school was ending, it was me, the principal, another one of my coworkers, we were just at this missile just hanging, and the principal asked this kid, he was like, hey, how's your uncle doing?

And the kid was like, he's not my uncle anymore. So now we're confused kid, he was like, hey, how's your uncle doing? And the kid was like, he's not my uncle anymore. So now we're confused. And he was like, yeah, he's not my uncle. My mom said we got a new uncle. And it's just like, oh yeah. Oh, oh, oh. Your mom's fucking your uncle. Right, yeah.

He just think his uncles are just dying. Ooh. We lost another one. It's crazy that they look so unlike us. Right. Was the mom telling the kid that the uncle was like her brother? Or? I'm not even sure.

Now that I think about that. Yeah, because you've got to understand there's like, I was raised by a mom that dated. Right. But she never like lied about it. She was never like, oh, this is a family. She would always, she would start by saying it was a friend. But immediately you're like, that's not true.

Men and women are friends. You know what I mean? You're like, I know, come on, mom. How stupid am I? But when you guys were sitting there and he said that, he was like, oh, he's not my uncle anymore. I got a new uncle. Were you guys all like, oh.

Right, yeah. How old are these kids? These were like middle school kids. Worst. Yeah. The worst. The kids that were looking me up online, those were middle school kids.

That's a nightmare for me. Yeah, but I- Hearing that, that's a nightmare. But I worked with like a wide range. So my first job coming out of college, I was working at a high school in North Philly. Yeah, terrible. Terrible.

What the fuck? Yeah, that shit was bad. And you're almost, like they look at you like you're their age. Right, cause this is my first job coming out of college. Yeah, they don't look at you like you're, you're not an elder. Right, I'm 22, working with 16 year olds.

So I'm not that far removed. Shit. And that shit, it was terrifying. Cause I was familiar with the school cause it wasn't too far from me. And like going to the school in Philly, like you, you gotta walk through metal detectors. So it was like right there, you are already depressed.

North Philly is fucking tough. It is insane. Is that near Mann's Performing Arts Center? Yeah. Dude, I'm gonna tell you right now. I've gone to concerts there before and you drive through North Philly and you're like, holy shit, this is a tough area.

Yeah. I've driven through rural bad areas. I've driven through parts of Brooklyn and shit that I've seen. North Philly might take the cake for a place that I drove through and I was like, holy shit, there is no infrastructure here. Like, if you go to Man Performing Arts Center,

make sure you get right back on the highway. Because if you go looking for late night food, they're gonna be driving through North Philly. And you're not gonna wanna stop. It's fucking crazy. You're working at a high school in North Philly. And that And you're not going to want to stop. It's fucking crazy. You were going to high school in North Philly. Yeah. And those and that's like high school for kids in those neighborhoods are like, oh, I'm away from anybody. I'll actually listen to. Right.

So it was like, but actually, but it's funny because those were the one kids that like actually gave me respect because I was so close to their age. Yeah. Where they're like, I don't know what this guy's capable of. Yeah, they might have some friends. Like also they probably think you're, you're probably more inclined to fight them than like an old man. Yeah. Like an old teacher is not like, I can't fight yet, but you're like, that's guys young. You still got elasticity. Yeah. That's nuts.

How long were you at that high school? I was just there for a year. And then like immediately after that one year there, that's when I moved to New York. Okay. Yeah fuck middle school kids are the meanest because they're the most I was the most miserable in middle school. So you when you're in when you're the most miserable you think of the most Miserable shit to say to people right you're trying to bring people down To where you're at so So them finding your comedy. And then, yeah. And how did you, what was it like discovering it? Were you like, did you look at a video and be like,

did they say something specific that gave it away? It was a few times they were like, they wouldn't say something too specific, but they would say like, I saw your videos, or like, you weren't, like, that's why you're not even funny. Yeah, so it would just be like little subtle stuff. And then I would start catching the comments.

And it would hurt because when you're new to YouTube, like my first time posting content, that would be the one comment. Yeah, that's so funny. It's like 28 views and just the comments, like you suck. Yeah, it's like damn, maybe I do comment. It's like, you suck. Yeah. It's like, damn, maybe I do.

Oh, man. I hope you get apologies. I hope there's like some kid. I will say, during the pandemic, that's when they actually did start hitting me up saying nice stuff. Really? So it changed during the pandemic?

Yeah, it's like, because you were gone. Right, yeah, it's like, oh, they genuinely do miss me. Oh, that's funny. It was like, we yeah, it was like, oh, they genuinely do miss me. Oh, that's funny. It was like, we had, it was like a love-hate relationship. Yeah. It's kind of like how Tom needs Jerry. Yeah, yeah, they need someone to chase them around

and tell them what to do so that they can rebel. And you are still young. Right. And you're like, to them, you're the coolest of the shitty people. Right. Teachers are the shittiest people. You're the coolest of the shitty people. Teachers are the shittiest people. You're the coolest of them. So when you're gone, immediately they're like,

hey, no hard feelings. It's gonna be crazy. Have you seen a kid that you used to teach show up to a show yet? Not yet, not yet. That's gonna happen. That's gonna be weird. That's gonna be weird as shit,

because you're gonna be like, what? I've had teachers that I've had come to shows, but I've never. Yeah, I've had that too. Yeah? I've had that too, and it is like, it was wild to see, realizing like, once you get older, you realize,

oh, this teacher is just a person. Just a dude. Just a dude. Yeah. Yeah, I had my journalism professor from Arizona, who I liked, Jim Hickox. Oh no, Jim Hickox is a dude. Yeah, I had my journalism professor from Arizona who I liked, Jim Hickox. No, Jim Hickox is a comedian. Jim Nensel, yeah, professor.

He was like a writer. And I was in San Francisco, I was just like eight years ago doing shows. And he just Facebooked me, he did something old. It wasn't new. But he's like, hey, I'm in San Francisco covering something and I got him a ticket And he was just like he was working and he like came and hung out and I was like, oh you're like a

Like a real reporter. He was like, yeah I was like I thought soon you have a professor or something you're like, oh, you probably did it But now you're teaching it but like it was nuts. It's like a regular guy. No, I had my I Remember I went back to my high school and I saw one of my teachers just like one of the my hardest teachers ever. I had pre-calc. Oh shit. Yeah. Fuck. And I did I did so bad in his class that in order to not go to summer school he made me do a book report. A math teacher made you do a book report. I had to do a five-page paper. That's how bad at math you are. were. He's like fuck arithmetic, read and write and I'll let you. What was the book report on? It was based on, I think it might have been based on like the history of math. That's so funny. He's like you can't do it. So I guess just learn where it came from. Yeah. and um, but we just had a conversation like and he was

He I forget how he found that I do comedy, but he started telling me like his favorite Chris Rock bits And I'm this is a man that I thought never left. Yeah, and it's like wow I finally get to see you as just a human now. Yeah the human being element of being a teacher Yeah, I always liked when I found out my teachers liked stuff Hey everybody It is a big scary world and the way to make it less scary learn language learn languages of other people communicate It's pretty big But have you ever thought about a gift for yourself?

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That's my name. That's Mack Weldon. M-A-C-K-W-E-L-D-O-N.com with the promo code Dan. There's a teacher I had that liked The Simpsons, like really liked The Simpsons. And it was great when you would like bring up a specific episode and he'd be like, yeah. And you're like, that're like, so I'm not that dumb. So I'm not that stupid.

But I mean, being a teacher and do, if I would have found out one of my teachers was like a singer or like an actor or something, you got to shit on them. Especially when they're your teacher. You got to take the shot. I don't blame any of those children for what they did. I get it, cause it's like, I'm here making nothing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And it's also though, like it fuels you. If you're on the kid's side and you're making the comments, you just have so much room to be like, I'm not listening to you. Yeah. Did they ever bring it up at school? Um, were they ever like, when they found out after you're a comic, were they like, fuck you, funny man? Or like, yeah? Yeah, all the time.

All the time. But it was funny because as I started to progress more, as I started to get more college shows, that's when I really started talking shit back. That's funny. That's funny. It's true. It's funny. Because when they first found out, I was like, all right, I got to stay calm.

I got to keep this job. Every time true, it's funny. Cause when they first found out, it was like, all right, I gotta stay calm. I gotta keep this job. Every time I would book a gig. You're like, I'm one step closer. Yeah. That's how everyone is on leaving a job. Leaving a job, when you see the daylight of leaving, good luck getting good work out of me. Right.

Through my last like two months waiting tables, I was shit. Wasn't bringing refills, was eating guacamole over at the computers. Good luck finding me. You need an extra side of tortillas? You better hold the fuck on because I'm not coming back. Because that's what it is. You're like, I'm out of here. Why would I try? Right. We should start paying teachers. We should start paying them like athlete money.

It's insane. There's so many teachers out here with part-time money. It's insane. There's so many teachers out here with part-time jobs. That's what I mean. Like I know a lot of teachers that do retail. That's crazy. I would never want to go to the Gap and see my history teacher. Right, yeah. Just holding pants.

Dude, just pay them. Pilots and teachers, just pay them. It's good that you say pilots too. Pilots, they give them like 40K a year. I know some can make more. And they have, I think they have like the highest depression rate, right? Yeah dude, they're just alone, flying everyone

to all their vacations and shit. Like the turnaround on pilots, you see they like land, they have to sleep, back up flagged him I never thought about it like that like you're taking other people to a vacation and then you just got to go right back home You're at work like you get to see Jamaica for a half hour You get to land there and then you're like, I gotta go back to Newark. Yeah That's always what it how I felt as like a waiter like you would be waiting on these people at a birthday party And you're like yeah, you guys are having a birthday party. I gotta go refill salsas like you know they're like

And you're like cuz I'm fucking working dude cuz I caught some habanero salsa in the eye Doing trios. It just is like pilots should be paid Pilots and teachers if you paid teachers and they didn't have to worry about money, education would get so good in this country. Oh, for sure. Because they'd be like, it would be a desirable job. Because I think people want to do good. I think naturally people want to.

And you want to help somebody. Yeah. You want to help these kids. I Love sports. I love sports I think we should cap how much athletes make and take that excess and put it down to teachers I like like in those cities. I know people be like nah fuck that that's fucking socialism But it's like nah, man, you're there's no point in paying your second baseman who's gonna leave in three years $54 million, where you could take $54 million

and put it into a school district and have teachers that make over 100K. If you gave teachers over 100K, they would be like, what do you want? Oh fuck, I got a lesson plan that's gonna knock your dick off. Right, and that's why teachers now, they have to like get OnlyFans.

Which is crazy, because there's no way I'm gonna learn. If you're hot, and you're fucking flicking your bean on OnlyFans, I'm not paying attention to the seven continents and four oceans, five oceans, whatever, see? Like I really do like empathize with teachers now. Like you remember having pizza parties in class and you would be mad that this teacher cut up

these eight slices into 30. Yeah, squares. Yeah, yeah. Oh my God, square pizza when I was a kid, I was like, fuck, spit at me. It's like you got this small square in your hand. A little XC cup of Dr. Pepper? Yeah, the cup that's used to rinse out your mouth.

Giving you a dentist cup, and you gotta fucking act like you're at a birthday party. And then when you realize, like, damn, that came out of her pocket. I didn't even realize that, I didn't even know that till now. I didn't know she was buying the pizza party. Meanwhile, she got to fuck the pizza guy on OnlyFans

to make the money to get the pizza. This is fucked. It's all fucked. And it's like, I don't know, man. I think this is why I'll never be wealthy. Because I would just want to turn around and drop it on someone who you could change their life. Like Bezos could come in and be like,

yeah, I'm gonna, Bezos could fuck up so much shit with how much excess money he has. And people that are all about stacking money. My only question is like, at what point does it just, aren't you, are you just greedy? Right. Like living a nice life is fine. And taking care of your next generation is fine. But from what I've noticed, every time I've bumped against them, rich kids and the kids of rich kids suck. They fucking suck. Unless they do a lot of soul searching or have been through a lot of trauma. Yeah. That's what's actually, you know, that's what's happening to the NBA now. Where it's

like this next generation is about to be all kids of like current NBA players. I mean, Steph Curry's dad was Dell Curry, played in the NBA. He grew up probably real nice. Cause I just looked at, what was it? The team USA under 17, where it's like LeBron's son, Bryce Carmelo's son, Gilbert Arena's son.

It's just all like former athletes., it's just all former athletes. Where it's like now, before the league used to be like these kids that had the struggle. Now it's like the league is about to be a bunch of children that come from like- They're rich kids. They're just rich kids. Six bedroom homes.

And there's nothing more hateable than a rich kid. Especially when you grow up, not a rich kid. That divide will never, because it's like, you're just jealous because they had everything. I mean, I always think that's interesting because especially in entertainment, but athletics, it happens everywhere. Nepotism is a thing that drives people nuts who aren't related to anybody

famous. But then the people who are famous and related to famous people, they do this weird shit where they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's not that bad. And you're like, yes, it is because you, it's not that you don't have to work hard. Take that out of it. Take the idea of effort out of it. It's where you start. Right. If your father is a famous actor, right?

Famous iconic actor like Kurt Russell, right? Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn. Kate Hudson is their kid, right? Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn. Kate Hudson is their kid, right? She's a great actress. But the whole discovery process, someone went, you know, Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn's daughter is like acting and they go, oh, I love them. And the casting director is like, oh, I love them. And then they see her and they go, she's beautiful. She can do it. You're in, you're in this How to lose a guy in ten days or whatever like whatever, you know what I mean versus like maybe a woman whose mom Was a teacher and dad worked at a factory and she's beautiful and she moved out

She's like studied acting and moved to LA and like made the effort and they're like, yeah Well, we just we don't have time to see you We already cast Kate Hudson and that woman's like well what the fuck right she might be a Better actress. I just think that's like if I were a basketball player and you're like From a bad neighborhood and you found something that can help The people around you. I don't know. That's an interesting conversation. Yeah, because If if you were a GM, I would you want would you want the nuggets to take Bryce? No.

No? No. Not at all. Not to get LeBron? No. I would rather, LeBron's one of the greatest of all time, if not the greatest of all time. I think he's, it's crazy, but he's at the end of his career. And I think there's something to be said about people that are trying to prove something.

And I don't think rich kids have... Now, let me phrase this because this is like kind of weird. I think rich kids are trying to prove something else. They're trying to prove they're not their dad. So that's a powerful drive. So you can't say that's not happening. But I think you want someone who like wants to prove that they can do it. Because that's where you're going to get. I don't know if you'll ever but that's hard

because Kobe's dad was a pro player, which you have to have. You have to have the dad had to be a role player. Yes. Yeah. Nailed it. Yeah, the dad can't be like all NBA, yeah. Jordan or LeBron, yeah, it has to be. Cause Kobe's dad was a role player. Right, Clay's dad. Clay's dad was a role player.

Steph's dad was a role player. I mean, Del Curry could shoot the lights out, but it was Larry Johnson on the Hornets. It wasn't Del Curry. Del Curry was playing like, I bet Robert Ori's kid would be like, look him up. I bet he's fucking nice. If your dad was a role player, I'm gonna draft you.

That's all I draft. I'd be like, that's all right. This kid's probably gotta be through their fucking roof. But I always think like, you know, and maybe that's a pressure that we don't understand because we don't have famous parents, but I'm sure it is a pressure to think like, you know, and maybe that's a pressure that we don't understand because we don't have famous parents But I'm sure it is a pressure to be like especially going to the same business as your family. Yeah, I Just um, I would just I was literally just talking about this story with somebody last night about Richard Pryor son

Yeah, I couldn't I couldn't imagine that pressure. It's also got that same name. Because you know, like with this, you have to go through that bombing process. You have to fail. Yeah. You also have to have a lot of, I think, you have to have a lot of bad shit happen to you that you've learned to make fun of.

Making fun of bad stuff is, think for me the basis of humor is like oh you can laugh it yeah shit getting splashed on you you don't have to have like a ton of it but you have to have that ability or something and rich kids I feel like they grow up being like no I tell someone that that's not okay and and they oblige because my father's powerful. That is good that you say that. That actually was my sign that I was funny. Was what?

Like being able to turn like just terrible situations into like this great story that I could laugh about. Yeah, if you go through something bad, you want to be with a comedian. Because I think they're going to be the first person that's like, well, this is fucking lame. And you're like, this is dark. You know, like you want someone to get hit by a car and then they're like, damn, then even, you know, see the way they bounced. It's like that scene in the departed where he shoots the guy and he

goes, Hey, fell weird. Yeah. And he's like, Francis, you gotta get some fucking therapy. But it's like, I think, I don't know, but Richard Pryor's kids grew up fucked up because he was addicted to, you know, he was free-basing. So that's like not a good, I don't know, man. Here, I think I've changed- And they grew up in Peoria. Yeah, Peoria, he grew up in Peoria.

I don't know, if Richard Pryor Jr. might've, but I think I might've changed my stance on Nepo babies in this conversation, because I'm realizing they are driven, but by something that we don't understand. Because like, you're not as good as your dad. Yeah. It's like mafia kids, like John Gotti Jr. You know what I'm talking about?

Like John Gotti Jr., they were like, yeah, you're not John Gotti Jr. You know what I'm talking about? Like John Gotti Jr. they were like, yeah, you're not John Gotti. You got everything you're dad. And then he's like, oh, fucking. But he fucked up. I don't know. Damn. I'm still out to lunch. I don't have an opinion on Neppo babies. I used to hate them. But now I'm

kind of trying to find some empathy for them. Because did you see a thing of what Brawny said where he was like, I've been through shit just because I'm a son of a rich kid doesn't mean I haven't been through shit. He had a heart attack. Right, he literally almost died.

Almost died on the court. Same thing with Shag Son. Yeah dude, it's like sometimes though you worry like, I'd be scared to be the son of a famous person because you're like, oh am I going to be the person that dies? Am I going to get Eric Clapton? Am I going to have a bad heart? Yeah. Do I have a bad heart?

Am I going to fall out a window while no one's looking? You're just like, fuck man. Because it's dangerous. You make that much money. But then why don't we do this to teachers we should give these problems to teachers being like yeah my father my father sold signed a 16.5 million dollar deal with Cherry Creek school districts and you're like damn they got the best math teacher in the state he's coming in and being like I know a new way to teach calculus that's

not sexy doing like good stuff. I mean, is that how you felt as a teacher? Were people like, did you get questioned about why you were becoming a teacher? Or are they just like good for you? No, no, no. Did I get questioned about it? Not really. Because I think everybody knew the reason I took my position, I was doing it because I didn't have to take any work home. So it allowed me to still be able to do this at night. Brilliant. Yeah.

So they knew you wanted to be a comic? Yeah. But you're like, I'm going to go teach. So it's funny. So I went to school for accounting. Yeah. I wanted to be an accountant, and then once I started doing comedy, my grades were just shot.

But you wanted to be an accountant? Yeah. What was that dream? You were just gonna be like, dude, tax season's gonna be nuts. Yeah? That was the dream. What made you want to be an accountant? I don't know. I

just, it just seemed like I just had to add, add, subtract. Like it was like, as long as you know the formulas is the basic math. I love that. Yeah. And rarely division and multiplication, multiple addition and subtraction. So yeah, the dream, the dream before comedy was to have a private firm. Yeah, you wanted to be it. You wanted to really get into it. Yeah. Be doing a lot. That's... Some of our sponsors are like,

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That's fun, I wanted to be a, I wanted to do something that didn't feel like work. That was always my, and I mean I got it. And now doing this is like, I can't even, I respect people that have nine to five so much because I can't even like understand the concept of having a serious job. I've been saying that for a while,

but I think that, I talked about that with Nick Mullen, but I think that's the next boom of podcasts. I'd rather have people that have nine to five jobs talk openly about office politics, sex stuff that's going on, drug stuff that's going on, I don't care about comedy anymore. We've talked about it enough. Everybody knows. People who have never done comedy know what it's like to do comedy. And they do know outside of the physical effects of the rush, they know everything. What a green room like, what the travels like, what a green room like what the travels like what a festival is like it's so funny I literally just said that about an hour

go to somebody yeah I see the thing I said like the thing people love about my podcast is that we don't do like the ins and out of like behind the scenes of comedy that's been a problem on this podcast. Because I am, I'm retardedly in the stand up. No, I try so hard not to nerd out about comedy as bad as I want to. Yeah, but when I started this podcast, I was like, I'll just hang out on the couch and talk. And then I realized how much I fucking just gab

about comedy. So we bought a cattle prod that Mike was gonna hit me with every time I talked about comedy. But then my buddy who worked on a farm was like, hey, I'll give you cardiac arrest. My girl hates it. She hates comedy talk. She hates it because like now that I have a pod is like, um, we might just be having

dinner and I'm just telling her clip ideas that I got. That's so funny. You got I got a new idea for the podcast. He's like, because it's not. I don't I am genuinely more interested by people. I'm more interested by the consumer than I am. Yeah, what we're making, because I think we've we've done it. We've reached the top.

Yeah, it's like, with my friends, I'm in a group chat with my friends that just have regular lives. Yeah, me too. And it's like, the stuff they talk about, trying to figure out mortgage rates and like- Child care, how they're gonna fucking go on vacation. Like my friend just traded in his car

and I'm like, you're just so responsible. What made you make that choice? I feel like we should start a podcast, me and you should start a podcast network for people who do regular jobs. Like just straight up regular jobs. And like there can be some anonymity if they would like, but I would like, I want to listen to that. Yeah.

Because I think what the fuck really was the first, you know, Marin was the first person to do like, here's behind the scenes of comedy, did it incredibly created all this other stuff where everyone started talking. You know, I think the hangout pods still work. You know what I mean? This one until a certain time, we're self diagnosing this podcast, but it might only have a little more than a year left. I want to kill podcasts.

That's my thing now. I want to start killing stuff off. I think comics need to go once I get a comfortable audience selling tickets on the road. I think that's's gonna be the only way you see me. I Don't want to do other stuff. I just want to stand up My goal like do you have like a goal that you have like once you get to that point? I like to walk away. I'd like to get the theaters selling out theaters comfortably and

Creating like really like a really great hour. Yeah, that's like my goal. Once I get to that point, I wanna just be able to like just live somewhere where like I just have a bunch of dogs. Yes. I wanna have a bunch of dogs like Caesar Malone. Yeah. That's the goal.

I wouldn't mind having three to four dogs. It's ideal for me. Where, you know, and like a house with a giant yard where if I go like, I gotta meet you around back, I'll meet you on the side. The dogs get a little nuts. I just wanna say that to a lot of people. They might see how I yell at my dog

where I'll be like, sit down, shut the fuck up. Just like different names. Yeah, that's what I, I feel like we're drawing close to the end of celebrity culture. I feel like it's been too much. Like Kim Kardashian getting booed at the Tom Brady roast, I think is like one of the signs that people are like, I'm kind of fucking done with all these people.

Because I think a lot of people are having a tough time living right now. And I think they're watching people who are complaining about having a nice time living. Because they think that, because the people that are having a nice life think that's what the people want to hear, but that's not what they want to hear.

They want to hear like, we see you and we know your life stinks and we want to hear about it in podcast form. So sign up for more Soder Network. For the Soder More Network. Well, dude, I feel like we are, I'm kind of serious right now. I feel like we're sitting on a huge idea.

Like, I kind of would listen to a guy that works at a tire factory, or like a guy that makes refrigerator doors. Also, be sure to watch Tires on Netflix. Stream it right now. Stream a show about a guys like us having real jobs. See what happens when comics pretend to have real jobs. Man, that show came out so awesome.

I loved it, man. That was such a fun watch. Bro, it's crazy because when we shot that, like, I thought it was just going to be another Gillian Keeves sketch. I thought it was like just be another Gilead and Keith sketch. I thought it was like just going on YouTube or Patreon. Well, they put the original tires up on YouTube and stuff. And when we shot it, it's funny,

I told them I have a hard four out, I had a hard out at 430 because I needed to make my spots back in the city. That's funny. You had to come back up to New York? Yeah. That's really funny. Which like, if I would have known

that it would have turned out that way, I would have asked for a room, a driver. I would have went all out. But you're also, your season one, when you come back on season two or season three, that's when you start going like, by the way, you could pick me up at my house at this location.

I'll have a driver. That's when Shane won't make eye contact with people. That's how famous he got. Shane different. He doesn't look at anybody anymore. He talks through McKeever. He was like, Shane doesn't like that. I'm like, well, Shane's standing right here, but we could talk to him about that.

Yeah. I think, uh, I think you and I should make the push to do podcasts of regular people. I love that. Sign up in the comments. Tell us what job you have and what, what your podcast would be. Cause if you live in the New York area, pimpy, we got it. We got to consider it. Things are going away.

And when things go away, it clears up space. I would leave this podcast, I would leave doing this podcast to produce a funny person's regular podcast where that's all they wanted to do and they had all these ideas and all you had to do was facilitate it. Come on, dude. I know my dad called me, my dad is 60.

I think my dad would be 61, I'm sure. And he just called me randomly. He doesn't know I have a podcast by the way. But he called me saying that he wanted to start a podcast where he has like a huge vinyl collection. So he said he just wanted to do a podcast where he just talks about one record. Yeah, yes.

And like, yeah. Done, we'll send the equipment. We'll get the RSS feed up immediately. We'll come up with a name, we'll get artwork done. Dude, I'm sick of comics talking. It's time for the other people to get on the mic. Because I think it'll save comedy. I think once we go back to just doing stand-up.

Yeah, because it's so, yeah, comedy now, the podcast, the clips. Clips. It's too much. Yeah, it's almost me, like, I still find certain people that make me a fan of it. Funny people are always gonna be funny. Right.

I am, between us, there are a few that I love, but I'm getting sick of athletes starting to do podcasts. I love Gilbert Arenas. Same. I love Gilbert Arenas. I love Bustin' with the Boys. I love, there's a couple. No, my favorite is Knuckleheads. Okay. Knuckleheads with Darius Miles and Quinn Richardson. Haven't listened to it. Oh, that's, it's by far the best, like you would love it because they interview like the people that from that you grew up watching yeah so and they and they started like their podcast is great but it is just getting ridiculous now the people that have podcasts well they just

do like you know the the NASA's has a podcast who does y'all his brother yeah he has a podcast why why I feel like there should it should have to be a point minimum. Yeah. Where? But listen, there are some guys I love Pat Beverly and Rone. OK, yeah, I like them. But then one time after a Clippers game, Pat Pat Bev said to a reporter, he goes, I'm not going to talk to you because you're not subscribed to my podcast. But you're like, no, no, no, here's the thing. That's her only job. Her job is to cover you. You gotta talk to her.

Don't make her listen to your side shit. That's like when Billy Bob Thornton did that interview and he wouldn't talk about acting. He'd only talk about his shit country band and you're like, no one gives a shit about your stupid fucking music. You're here to talk about the thing that got you to where you're like, no one gives a shit about your stupid fucking music. You're here to talk about the thing that got you to where you're at. Right. You know what I mean? So that made me mad. Or I'm like, come on. I love Pat Beverly. And I'm like, come on, dude. And in that situation pissed me off because I hated Pat Bev up until this year. Oh, he's great. I hated him. That's why I've always liked it.

Being on the other side of it, when he joined the Sixers, I was like, I love this energy he's bringing to us. It's like, dude, it's an enforcer. It's a goon. It's that energy in sports, where you get someone that is there to start shit, and when

they do it to your team, you hate it. But when they're on your team, you're like, aw, what? Come on. Yeah, you're like, oh, what, come on. Pat Buff, he reminds me of the kid that would get water from the waterfall and put his mouth on it. Yeah, and be like, now it's mine. Yeah.

And like, be loud about it. Yeah. Under that, and you're like, fuck, man. Even, but he doesn't care about the risks. You know, dirty little thing. He goes, I don't care, it's mine. And I've upset a lot of people in the process. I do like that, because I want more of that energy. I'm more like, you guys mad?

I want more of that. I want more like, my mouth, aw. Damn, dude, with our podcast network making money, we're going to have so many dogs. Then we're going to start breeding dogs. Like, remember when OutKast, when Big Boy started selling pit bulls? That's gonna be me and Anthony.

You're gonna catch us and be like, we have a beautiful golden retriever bred. Yeah. What kind of dog you have? She's a mutt. She's like a terrier. She like 12 different things. Okay, okay.

We adopted, we adopted, we saved her. We saved her from the, no, she was a puppy, she was adorable. Our friend was fostering it. We're like, that puppy rules. And they're like, it's your puppy now. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. What do you got? I got a cockapoo.

Cockapoos are great. Yeah. How's the bark? Everybody thinks it's something huge. Yeah. Because he hates when people... He... Friendly on the street.

He doesn't like when people go in the elevator with us. When people go in the elevator or walk by or are doing the hallway, he hates it. Your dog couldn't live in this apartment. Cause our elevator is packed all the time. And to get to the roof, you have to stop off at our floor. Our dog hates that. Cause people are just drunk in the hallway.

So he just goes nuts. Did your dog go nuts? Yeah. But it was crazy. He actually changed me. I didn't want a dog at all. Really? I was never a dog person.

My girl, she made me get the dog because I kept saying I didn't have the money for it. And then she saw my spreadsheet of my college shows. Yeah. She was like, I see you going to the University of Oklahoma this weekend. That's so funny. She saw a check and she was like, we're getting a dog. Did she pick it out? Yeah.

Did you have any involvement in that? Only thing I picked out was I just didn't want a big dog for my first one. She wanted to get like a full grown doodle or she wanted her family has a bunch of huskies. So she was. Huskies are fucking legit. Yeah. Huskies are legit. We were just talking about it.

I got bit by a husky chow mix. So I'm a little leery about huskies cause they look a lot like wolves and chows are mean. Yeah. Chows are like the meanest dogs. Yeah. They're they're undercover. The most meanest dogs. Yeah, they're undercover, the meanest dogs. Everyone thinks it's like a Rottweiler or a pit. No, it's a chow, dude. Chow, fuck your shit up.

It's because chow's, they have such beautiful fur. Yeah, people just want to touch them. It's like how hot chicks are mean. Yeah, it's like when you see a drug dealer in a main coat. Yeah. It's like, no, it's still a drug dealer. Yeah. Just dress nice.

It's still a person that can fuck your shit up. Yeah. Yeah, and hot girls that just want to get touched, they're like, after a while, they's like, no, it's still a drug dealer. You just dress nice. It's still a person that can fuck your shit up. Yeah. Yeah, and hot girls that just want to get touched, they're like, after a while, they're like, oh, fucking. I'll take everything you have. My girl, she broke her hand from one of the Huskies. It just darted out the door, and she tried to grab the leash. Just pulled her.

No way. Just pulled her down. Dude, our dog, Katie's mom came out to Providence to see shows, because they're in Massachusetts. And we were like, the dog was with me, because Katie was out doing baseball. And I just had the dog in the hotel room. And I was like, oh, you want to see Myrtle?

And I go get her or whatever. And Katie's mom loves the dog. But she's holding the leash. And Myrtle saw something in the bush and took off and pulled my mother-in-law like on the grass and dragged her. I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no. And she still likes the dog. But I was like, dude, I nearly got on the phone with Katie

after she called that game. I was like, ah, Myrtle dragged your mom in the grass. She was like, god damn it. But Myrtle's only like a 45 pound dog, 50 pound dog. I had 110 pound golden retriever growing up. That's huge. That's a big boy. Yeah, but he was so cool He was so less

He was just no drama He would bark when someone would show up, but then he was just like, oh you're cool Once you were in the house, he was like that you're fine And then he just go lay down and he just did his own shit That's kind of dogs. I like the dogs. They're like I know what this relationship is Mmm, I'll what this relationship is. We'll show each other some love, you'll fill my dish, and I'll leave you alone most of the time. See, I got a pandemic dog, so.

They're nuts. Yeah, he's spoiled. He's always, he's so used to having somebody over, so for me, when it's podcast time, he think these are his guests. That's so funny. So we gotta. I mean, he watches it's podcast time he think is these are his guests that's so funny so we I mean he's he watches it all the time Myrtle will come and sit where you at at the mic like I'm a fucking interviewer because she lays this is her

couch you like lays from side to side and like lay this I look out the window and I'm like don't get the fuck out of here and she's like we know why everyone's here yeah it's me we just pulled a funny thing because I was gone for a week I was gone for a week. I was gone for a full week and when I come home, she's used to Thursday through Sunday. Like I leave Thursday, come home Sunday. She still gets excited. But when I'm gone for like seven to 10 days, she thinks I'm dead. So when I show back up, she's like, what the fuck? And I flew home yesterday afternoon, got home, and she was like, the fucking guy's back, the guy's back.

And she like wouldn't leave me alone, was like laying on me, like would not leave me alone. But we're both going out of town tomorrow, Katie's gone already, so we had to go give her to somebody. So I literally showed up and was like, hey, I'm back. And she's like, good, now you're going to this place in a van, and she was like, what the fuck? I watched her energy swing from being like, hey, I'm back. And she's like, good. Now you're going to this place in a van. And she was like, what the fuck? I watched her energy swing from being like,

you have to be like, she wouldn't even look at me on the elevator. I was like, Murdoch. She's like, I don't want to look at you. I know where we're going. We're holding this certain bag. She knows. And she's like, this motherfucker.

And it's so funny because you can't explain it to them. Yeah. Just being like, I swear to God I love you. I know, I wish, that's what I wish me and my dog could have a real conversation. Yeah, just one. Yeah, just to get it all out there. It's like, listen, dude, that'd be, that's the podcast.

A human and a dog talking? That's the podcast I wanna hear. Where he goes, listen, I'm gonna take you for a walk. Sometimes I wanna fuck in the morning. So the walk is going to be a little delayed. I didn't forget about you. You don't need to shit in the house. Hold it for me, your best friend.

Hold it. Did you like having a dog when you first got it? What was the process of you getting into it? That first week was rough because we got him, we got him on a Saturday. We had to drive out like to some farm in Pennsylvania. Got him on Saturday. She was home with him. Like we took him to the park Sunday together.

And then after that, she went right to work. So Monday she was at work. Yeah, so it was like, she was at work. So now it's like, I got this dog for you that you just left me with and you got a train It to make sure doesn't piss in the house. Yeah, and this is like my first I'm enjoying finally being a full-time comic. Yeah, so like I'm enjoying not doing nothing What you can I'm writing jokes if you feel like right now I gotta be a dog trainer

Yeah, and you know that first week of not wanting to walk on the leash or I'm just on edge because he keeps pissing on the rug when you hear it yeah you just hear that liquid pouring into the rug like I know what that is but then we like growing together I remember that first time I'm taking a piss lifting his leg up. I was so proud. For you, like? Yeah. I was like, my boy's a man. Yeah.

And what, do you remember the moment where you're like, nah, this rules? Do you remember the moment that you're like, I fucking love this dog? Yeah, it started happening when we start taking naps and him just jumping to lay on me. That like, those first naps of us just laying together. Yeah, mine was I was sitting on the carpet

like against the couch watching TV and she sat next to me and then like leaned her whole weight on me with being unprovoked. She came and sat down and then like leaned all the way and I was like, I fucking love this dog. And then she gets here, she was a puppy and you're like, herp. And I hear that moment, I was like, I fucking love this dog. And then she gets here, she was a puppy, and you're like, herp! And I hear that moment, you're like,

I'll fucking kill for this goddamn dog! I love it. I fucking love dogs, dude. It, I went a long time without having one, and then I was like, dude, this fucking rules. Damn, now I miss Myrtle. I wish that fat little asshole was in this apartment. Fuck, dude, dogs rule.

There really is something about him where you're like, I don't understand how people can hate him. Yeah, and even watching, I remember seeing, I love Keanu Reeves, so I'll watch anything Keanu Reeves. Just like top three humans. I think you're getting to the formula of why they did the John Wick franchise. Yeah, so watching the first one before I had a dog I just

thought it was a great movie yeah now I fully understand the concept of murdering a group of people dangerous dangerous criminals like I understand it so well they fully deserved it Yeah, there is no justification for what they did Yeah, and also my favorite part of the first John wick is when the dad Tells him that he fucked up. Have you seen all of them? Yeah So you ever have like that moment where somebody likes your Instagram post and like it just blows your mind Sure, I can't believe this person

so I put up a joke and The guy that was in the most recent one. Yeah, the the guy that had the dog and the in the last John Wick Yeah, he liked my post and that was just the coolest shit ever to me as a dog person Yeah, cuz you're like, yeah, you're in the franchise. Yeah. Fuck 101 Dalmatians. Right. John Wick is the dog franchise. Right. If you were a dog in that, in that franchise careers made. Yeah. Cause you go, you know, that's one of the dogs from John Wick. If I was like, why are you asking me? I'm like, that'd be the only time like around a celebrity where I'm like, all right,

that's pretty fucking cool.