Soder - She TOOK the Cat with Todd Barry | Soder Podcast | EP 18

Episode Date: March 13, 2024

This episode Dan is joined by comedian Todd Barry. They talk comedy and cats. Follow Todd Barry https://www.instagram.com/toddbarry/?hl=en PLEASE Drop us a rating on iTunes and subscribe to the show... to help us grow. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/soder/id1716617572 Dan is on the road all 2024! Get tickets @ https://www.dansoder.com/tour March 28-30 Nashville,TN April 12-13 Omaha,NE April 19-21 Washington,DC May 31st - June 1 Columbus,OH Connect with me! Twitter: https://Twitter.com/dansoder Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dansoder Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dansodercomedy Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/dansoder Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/@dansoder.comedy #dansoder #standup #comedy #entertainment #podcast Produced by  @homelesspimp  https://www.instagram.com/thehomelesspimp/?hl=en

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 You know how people have like an evil cat? I've got a fat dog that's disinterested. And everyone's like, oh, is she fat? Dude, look at that. That's so much neck hair, neck fat. She's a little self-conscious about it. But look at that. What are you doing with all that, miss?
Starting point is 00:00:16 Where did you get all that? Hi, Dan Soder here. I'm on the road. Myrtle, don't you? She loves Hummel's Pimp so much that she's just going to give up and go lick them watch and she's gone So I was going to her kennel damn. She's mad. I'm going on the road. I just got back from the road She's so mad. I'm going back out on the road
Starting point is 00:00:34 But I am I got to pay for her food and her chew toys and shit and her cossack win for her hips dog owners Know what I'm talking about I'm gonna be in Nashville, Tennessee, March 28th, through the 30th at Zanies, one of my favorite clubs in the world. So go check me out at Zanies, Nashville, and then I'm gonna be at the Omaha Funny Bone in Nebraska, April 12th and 13th, DC improv, April 19th through the 21st,
Starting point is 00:01:01 in Columbus, Ohio, I'll be at the Funny Bone, May 31st and June 1st Other dates might pop up go to dance order calm see where I'm at buy a ticket I love you other comics say that but I mean it I fucking love you Yeah, so we're just friends But you've always been a cat person. Oh, yeah Yeah, I've never had a dog but I your whole life never no I mean I like dog we had a cat when I was younger and Then I had a girlfriend's maybe eight years ago who had a cat and then she moved in with the cat and
Starting point is 00:01:46 Then I got a cat So when she left she left the conversation of She leaves the cat staying. Oh, no, it's a new cat. Oh, you know, no took the cat with her Yeah, I would have taken her cat though. The cat was amazing. Was there ever a conversation about no No, I don't think I honestly think that that would be one of the hardest parts of breaking up with being like, who gets the cat? It was her cat. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:02:09 It's always a funny name too. You're like, who gets Funyuns? It's like a fight where you're like, you just don't listen to me, Todd. He goes, well, I'm taking Funyuns and I'm getting the fuck out of here. Oh, that's not a bad name for a cat. Yeah, Funyuns, a great snack too.
Starting point is 00:02:26 Do you think so? Yes. Todd, you have to understand something about me. I have a white trash power. Oh yeah, I do too, but Funions just never, I mean, if I was sitting there in those bag of Funions, is this too deep for this podcast? No, this is exactly what this is.
Starting point is 00:02:41 This is the point of this podcast. For someone that's bored, that's driving to work, that wants to talk, I fully expect people to talk back at this podcast. So I expect when people listen to this podcast to go like, no, no, fuck that, Funyuns rule, in their car by themselves. It's weird the way people get fired up about
Starting point is 00:02:59 whether you like Funyuns or not. Like, there's gonna be people who do like- Off air, we were talking about a lot of stuff. I don't know if you've noticed a trend. People just look for anything to get fired up about now. Yeah, yeah. You can go like, yeah, marshmallows and hot chocolate sucks. And then there'll be people that are like,
Starting point is 00:03:13 I'll burn your fucking house down. I have a pretty good story. You wanna hear a story? Let it rip. Did I, oh, I dodged the Funyuns question. Yeah, what did you say, when you said there with a bag of Funyuns. You like, do I say I dodged it?
Starting point is 00:03:24 Yeah, yeah, good job. Congratulations, I'll candidate Todd Berry funyons like do I say I dodged it? Yeah, good job Oh, yeah, if you love Todd Barry if you poured me a bowl of funyons right now like we were sitting here I wouldn't do it while we're recording, but I would eat the funyons, but I would never buy funyons You wouldn't go out of the way. No, I mean they taste they're fine But they're if I was gonna eat something like that I would have a Dorito you think Like that I would have a Dorito you think There's never a time where you get hit like I just got hit the other week with a Cheetos puffs Uh-huh. I was like I want Cheetos puffs I mean you got hit with them like that like I was like in the store and I saw Cheetos puffs
Starting point is 00:03:56 And I was like there we go the funyons you got the yellow and the green bag Yeah, you see it and I think for me the thing that would pull me to funyons would be going I haven't had these in a while. Yeah, but I don't think I actively go like no funions all go Doritos Funions is only for me like a hey, I haven't had this in a fucking long time But I mean, I don't even buy Doritos I mean on the road I'll buy Doritos when it's like you eat like shit on the road Well, I I use as an excuse to eat shit on the like yeah Because it'd be like hey everything's closed here in this smaller town that I'm in Do you eat like shit on the road? Well, I use as an excuse to eat shit on the road. Like shit on the road.
Starting point is 00:04:25 Cause it'd be like, hey, everything's closed here in this smaller town that I'm in. Look, the Coriabin there has some Doritos in the lobby. Yes, I have to have Doritos. It's better than nothing. I will look for an excuse to eat McDonald's on the road. I will look for an excuse to go like, well, the McDonald's is open.
Starting point is 00:04:41 Yeah, I love McDonald's. Yeah, I like when there's no choice, but just eat it someplace that's shitty. Yeah, oh yeah. Because I love McDonald's. Yeah, I like when there's no choice but to eat at some place that's shitty. Yeah, you get to eat. Oh, just in Applebee's, I guess I'm calling it Applebee's. You know what's funny is it really is that's the same part of my brain that when I drank would be like,
Starting point is 00:04:55 oh, my flight's delayed, probably should go get five drinks at the airport bar. Yeah, yeah. Because you really are just looking for that excuse to go like, fate sent me here. I almost stopped at McDonald's on my way here because I was running early and I was like oh god. You're like I don't let me take some time off. Because McDonald's everyone says is that just so consistent like anywhere you go I think. Yeah. I haven't had one in like Japan or anything but.
Starting point is 00:05:17 Yeah um. Little Duvall the comedian had a theory that he doesn't get sick when he travels because he always eats McDonald's. So if he's in like China, he'll eat, and it's like, well sure you could try the local cuisine, but if you're playing it safe and you have gigs. That's funny. That is, eat McDonald's. That's really funny. That's really funny like rationalization.
Starting point is 00:05:36 But by the way, it makes complete sense. It's kind of, I mean, I guess it does if they have the same cleaning protocol. Yeah, you just go to a place and you go like, I know what I'm gonna get. Yeah. Oh, do you wanna hear that story I was gonna tell you? Yeah, let it rip to a place and you go like, I know what I'm going to get. Yeah. Oh, do you want to hear that story? I was going to tell you.
Starting point is 00:05:47 Yeah, let it rip. This is about someone getting mad. I was at the comedy cellar, this was maybe a year or two ago, and I was telling a joke about going to a cat cafe in New Orleans. Yeah. And I literally just said, I went to a cat cafe in New Orleans.
Starting point is 00:06:00 And I may have said, and it was great. And this woman goes, what? Yeah. And I go, I went to a cat cafe in New Orleans. And then I did the joke like everyone was, I just repeating it back got a big laugh because like, what are you yelling? Also your low energy voice saying something back,
Starting point is 00:06:19 the way that your joke structures are, you doing that does seem like a joke. You're going like, cat cafe, New Orleans. But it was also just like, I didn't, did I say something a little crazy? You're, and the next day she tweeted, if you're going to say something about New Orleans, make it funny. Yeah. I was like, you're man, literally, because I said New Orleans out loud.
Starting point is 00:06:43 And it was a nice story about New Orleans. Yeah. And it was like I was in New Orleans because I wanted to be there. And you're also just, it has nothing to do with New Orleans. It's a point of reference to go like, here's, you know what it is? You're like giving them a piece of truth where you go like,
Starting point is 00:06:56 hey, there is a cat cafe in New Orleans. Right. In case you don't believe, that's the kernel of truth. And now I'm gonna tell you a joke. Right, and it's like, for her to go like, oh, you better, you that could have happened in Cleveland or something and then I would have said in Cleveland There's a cat cow just wrong fucking city like to be what someone's sitting in someone sitting in the crowd they go Anyone brings up New Orleans. I'm gonna fucking wreck their day. It's just this defensiveness over not even being attacked Well, that's my question for you a lot of your jokes are
Starting point is 00:07:26 Sometimes interactions with people. Yeah, they are there. Do, that's my question for you. A lot of your jokes are sometimes interactions with people that you love. Yeah, they are. Do those people ever reach out to you? You know, there is, well, on the special. Because the special domestic short here, available now on YouTube. Oh, yeah. We watched it.
Starting point is 00:07:39 It's fucking great. There are so many great jokes. I was telling you about, for instance, the salad bar lady salad bar. Yeah. Yeah tells you that the Italian isn't good Yeah, yeah, have you ever had a situation where? That person Reaches out to you. Um Not from my comedy act from my book someone did really I don't know if I want to get into it all right, you don't have to get into it but uh
Starting point is 00:08:01 Yeah, I don't know if I want to get into it. All right, you don't have to get into it. But actually, the guy, well, I even talk about the guy who, there's a joke in my act, or my former act, because I throw everything out. He's disregarded. I write a new hour every day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got a prolific. No, there was a guy in the, who I asked,
Starting point is 00:08:19 he said he was a cabinet salesman. Do you remember that joke? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, maybe like a year ago, I was in, I think it was New Orleans, and I said, I was talking to the guy, and he said, he was a cabinet salesman. Do you remember that joke? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, maybe like a year ago, I was in, I think it was New Orleans. And I said, I was talking to the guy, he said he was a cabinet salesman. This guy yells, that was me.
Starting point is 00:08:30 That's crazy. And then I look and I go, oh yeah, it was him. That's not. First I was like, oh, is someone asshole yelling out? Oh yeah. Hey, yeah, you are him. So that was kind of surreal. And it was kind of cool, like, God,
Starting point is 00:08:41 that must have been kind of crazy to hear. To sit there like, and some guy starts telling a joke that's absolutely about you. Yeah. It probably has to feel, I would imagine, like a little invasive or spooky. Like you're like, I was just saying everything, like someone's talking about you. Yeah, yeah. And you have no control over it. I mean, I've also had people like think that I them talking about them. Have you ever had that? Where people have reached out being like that joke about me.
Starting point is 00:09:07 Yeah, that thing you said about me like not about you. Yeah, I've had that on my colleagues. Not even close to being about you. My comedy central hour, someone reached out and was like, hey, is that joke about me? And I was like, I understand why you think it is, but it's not, it's about this person. And the second I said that, it was cool.
Starting point is 00:09:21 But they definitely hit me with some paranoid like, what was funny is I hadn't talked to them in awhile. And then the special came out. And they were like, great job on the special. And you're like, thanks, how's everything? It was like layers. They're like, how's everything going? Good.
Starting point is 00:09:34 So. They're like, they're just waiting to fucking. Yeah. And they go, was that about me? You go, no, that wasn't about you. I did a joke about this Pilates class I took. And I- Yeah, where you said there was you and the three girls. And I just sent it to the instructor.
Starting point is 00:09:45 That's fun. You might want to have a look at this. My mom, I have that where I have jokes about my mom, cause she raised me as a single mom, and so I tell stories or whatever, and sometimes I have jokes about like, her dating my dad's ex-best friend, and I just did a show in Boulder back in the fall,
Starting point is 00:10:00 and she had never seen those jokes. Oh, wow. And I was genuinely interested to see how her reaction was, and after the show she was just complimented and say anything and then finally at Christmas I was like hey you never commented on the jokes and she went no you nailed it. Oh that's good. That's good yeah. I was like yeah. You know what to piss your mom off. Well my first Conan I did a joke about my mom dating all the time. Oh. And I called her and I was like hey is that alright and my mom was very cool about it And I called her and I was like, hey, is that all right?
Starting point is 00:10:25 And my mom was very cool about it. She was like, hey, I'd put you through it. If you can make it funny, then go ahead. She has the right idea. Well, there's a lot of parents. Did your parents ever get mad about any jokes you did? I kind of was, I feel weird. I never let my parents see me.
Starting point is 00:10:39 They never saw you? No, I feel terrible about that. Did they ever see you just stand up once? Not in the room. I would tell them when I was on TV. They would just freak me out too much. And I, you know, I know I'm telling you this, I feel kind of terrible about this.
Starting point is 00:10:53 I feel terrible about that, but I- But there is something cool about the first time your parents see you, it's on Letterman. Yeah, so I would call them and go, hey, and I would wait till I filmed Letterman. And they'd go, hey, I'm on Letterman tonight. And all tonight. Yeah, yeah. So he'd be like, hey, and I would wait till I filmed Letterman. And then I go, hey, I'm on Letterman tonight. And all tonight. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:07 So he'd be like, hey, this is before DVR. Drink a cup of coffee. You're staying up. You're staying up. Were they, I mean, how excited were they? They were pretty, yeah, they were excited, yeah. I just feel, I just felt like I was just too like self-conscious about, but I do feel bad.
Starting point is 00:11:22 Do you feel comedians now or more? Brazen and emboldened to tell people that you stand up how long you've been doing comedy me 36 years. That's crazy That is crazy. I mean 19 crazy in every sense of the word crazy 1987 yeah, yeah, so you watched the fall of the 80s boom I Never really know I mean Yeah, I guess so but I never noticed this huge drop off. You didn't know, so this is interesting, because I'm always like. But I also moved to New York after a year, so.
Starting point is 00:11:54 That's about what I did. I mean, I did two years in Tucson, and then I moved to New York. Where did you start? In Florida. Okay. And it was. I would never guess you were from Florida.
Starting point is 00:12:03 I'm not, I was born in the Bronx. Oh, okay. That explains the edge that I had yeah But I lived in Florida like 15 from like eight to like 23 so like 15 years I think so you grew up in yeah That's what people want to say I Chata Dude you just tried so hard to get out of the fact that you're from Florida I've never seen someone pivot that hard. I'm from the Bronx. I mean, I was born in the Bronx.
Starting point is 00:12:26 I live here in the Bronx. Here's the same situation. I was born in Hartford, right? Cause my mom worked at Etna. We moved to Denver when I was five. So I lived in Denver from when I was five to 18. So I'm from Colorado. So you're from Florida.
Starting point is 00:12:39 All right, it's your podcast. I guess you're telling me where I'm from. That's cool. I think everyone, I would be willing to put up a Twitter poll to say, it's your podcast, I guess. You're telling me where I'm from, that's cool. I think everyone, I would be willing to put up a Twitter poll to say, is Todd from Florida? I think daily Twitter polls to really get a good cross-ex. I'll find out. But yeah, I started in Florida.
Starting point is 00:12:55 So you started in Florida. And then after a year, you're like, fuck this, I gotta. Well, I'd actually already decided I wanted to live in New York. We come back to New York where I'm from in Florida. Because we moved to Florida because my dad's company got moved down there. Sure.
Starting point is 00:13:08 And we just, it's like this weird, like we're moving to Florida really? I've never. I'm always fascinated by that because I, I was five when we moved, so I don't really remember it. Yeah. And all I knew was Colorado. And when you grow up in a cold weather environment
Starting point is 00:13:21 like New York, and then you move down to Florida, that's gotta suck. If you like cold weather environment like New York, and then you move down to Florida, that's gotta suck. If you like cold weather. I hate cold weather, but I don't remember having a weather-based opinion of how to move. I always, Florida to me is always too muggy. Too hot, too muggy. I mean, when it's nice, it's nice,
Starting point is 00:13:40 but then there's hurricanes, but it's up to you too. So when you were gonna do, when you got into comedy, like I will move to New York. Well, we, my family and I took a few trips back to New York just to visit while we were in Florida, where you think I grew up. And at one of those things, one or two of those trips, I was like, oh, this is where I wanna live.
Starting point is 00:14:02 And I'm not like the most decisive person in the world. If I have choices, I'm like freaked out, but this was like, this is where I want to live and I'm not like the most decisive person in the world if I have choices I'm like freaked out but this was like this is where you just knew yeah so then I went to college University Florida go Gators and I am a Florida boy I'm a big sports fan we were breaking down the 49ers 4-3 rush against the Lions this weekend for the show. I think I know what Rush means, but that's about the four or three I don't get. It's blitz, yeah, you got it. But what was the question? So you're at University of Florida.
Starting point is 00:14:34 Yeah, yeah. Did you start there? Comedy? Yeah. No, I started after I got back. Like I never wanted to be a comedian. Like people would say you should be a comedian, you should be a comedian.
Starting point is 00:14:42 I was like, no, I don't wanna be a comedian. Really? Yeah, and it just, because I was in a few bands down there and I just, in my mind, I knew I wanted to be in show business but I didn't wanna be a comedian. You don't wanna be a clown. I just, it just- What'd you play in the band?
Starting point is 00:14:57 I was a big comedy fan, I was drum, I played drums but I was never particularly good, you know? And I didn't, I wasn't one of those people like, I feel like the drummers, you know, and I didn't I wasn't one of those people like I feel like the drummers You see you're like they're good. Oh that guy sits in his garage all day. Yeah plays drums. Yeah, which is what he should do That's why he's really good. Yeah So I don't know and it's also hard just Just get you know getting along with three other people or four other people
Starting point is 00:15:22 I don't know how people in bands do it. Yeah. Because people in bands will tell us, I don't know how you just go on the road alone. And you're like, well, I'm only looking out for me. Yeah. Yeah, I think musicians, because they know they can like, you can turn your back on the audience and look at your amp for 10 minutes. You can also like, in which when songs talk to your friend
Starting point is 00:15:43 on stage, you go like, that sucks. Look at this guy in the red shirt. Yeah. Yeah. So I think there's the they they contrast it with what they do which is like kind of not as they hide behind a guitar because it takes skill to play guitar. Well Prince used to actually hide. Yeah. Prince could do whatever he wants. Yeah. He would go hide out. So when you were in this band what got you to do an open mic? What got you to get on stage? I was always a comedy fan like and I was really into like the You know like the talk show comics would be like there's a hot young comic new these new quote-of-quote new comments and like Letterman
Starting point is 00:16:17 I saw before he had a TV show. I was oh really? Yeah, I knew about him before Like I went to his morning show when we came back to New York once. Really? He had a more, a daily morning show for a while. So you were, you are the definition of I knew the band before they blew up. Yeah, and did you ever see my viewer mail clip on Letterman? No. I was on Letterman when I was 18.
Starting point is 00:16:36 Really? He called me on the air. And you can look it up if you want to. That's nuts. Yeah. Wait. I mean, it's worth a look. And it's been.
Starting point is 00:16:43 I mean, I talked about it on every podcast I've ever done, but. And he called you from the show. Well, we trust me, we can edit this in. Wait, I mean it's worth a look and it's I mean I talked about it on every podcast of every day And he called you from the show. Well, we trust we can edit this in our editor. They pop notch I am I know this looks unprofessional now, but you guys have the same people who do the matrix, right? Yeah, they we got them they they ended up not wanting to work with the check. Oh, here it is Todd I can't believe I'm doing a plug for a bidet. I was a guy that was like, I'll never use a bidet. Why would I ever have that? I've got wipes.
Starting point is 00:17:09 Wipes work well. Well, guess what? They don't. Tushy sent me a bidet, water up this butt the whole time. Dude, it's crazy how clean it is. I used the bidet once and I was like, oh, I kind of get it. And then I used it again and I was like,
Starting point is 00:17:24 I don't know how people use toilet paper. This is the cleanest I've ever felt after taking a dump. It actually cleans your butt. And if you're a man, we're just going to be honest, you got a hairy asshole. Unless you're shaving it, in which case, what's up with the maintenance on that, dude? You're probably gonna have little prickly hairs, in groans. If you're a dude and you just let your butt hair do what your butt hair does, get a tushy. It cleans your butt better than anything. Wipes toilet paper. Not even a close comparison.
Starting point is 00:17:55 It's all about the tushy. The fresh water hitting your butt. It cleans your bum two times better and gentler than wiping. For the rest of your life. You can leave bathroom sooner. You know what? That is a good point. I know it's like a talking point that they give me, but the confidence in leaving, being like, I'm not streaking up my hands. I feel pretty damn good.
Starting point is 00:18:14 Every hello tushy bidet comes with a 30 day hassle free return and a 12 month warranty. Plus they easily attach to your toilet. This is the part that freaked me out. It's like, how do I attach this thing? Less than 15 minutes. I know it says 10 minutes. If you're an idiot like me, 15 minutes. But then when you hook it up, you're like,
Starting point is 00:18:32 oh, now I can just clean my butt with water the entire time. It's awesome. It's another reason why I love coming home from the road. Cause I know I'm gonna get my ass licked by that, but day. I know it's gonna to shoot poop off my side walls. And that's really all you want. So stop wiping until you bleed. Join the three million butts who have already made the switch to Tushy. For a limited time, our listeners get 10% off your entire order when you use the code SOTR at checkout. That's 10% off your order at
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Starting point is 00:21:03 But also I love that you're doing this because I'm from Colorado, but also I love that you're doing this because I'm from Colorado. So go to box of awesome.com and use the promo code SOTR for a free mystery gift your first month. Todd Raz, I'm guessing that's just a nickname. His last name is Barry from Tamarack, Florida. It's one of the same from Tamarack, Florida. Unbelievable impression of Paul Schaefer.
Starting point is 00:21:26 Here are the options, eh? Fly me to New York, pay for everything, and I'll do the impression on your show. Yeah, right. Or call me, and I'll do it over the phone. So go ahead, Dave, pick either A or B. A real nifty gift. Either way, I'm sure it will turn out to be a real nifty gig.
Starting point is 00:21:43 Oh, gig. It was a tough choice, Todd. I want to see it with you real watching. He called you. I'm sure it will turn out to be a real nifty gig That's me when I was eight Yeah, and we put the clip in there what's crazy about this clip is it's funny to hear And this man, Paul, is going to do an impression of you. Has anyone ever done this? No, this is going to be interesting. Yeah. And we put the clip in there. What's crazy about this clip is it's funny to hear, you know, I think in comedy, a lot of times it takes, it's taken me years to find out what my onstage delivery is, like what I'm the best with.
Starting point is 00:22:18 You're just, you're just Todd Berry. I was pretty weirdly comfortable talking to David Letterman on the phone. It sounds like... And there's a thing you didn't hear yet where I kind of make a joke. It gets a big laugh. But, yeah, I mean... When you were on the phone, when you found out Letterman was going to call you, were you like pissing your pants?
Starting point is 00:22:40 Yeah, well what happened was, yeah, he was one of my guys. Yeah, what happened was I, I, you know one of my guys. Yeah, what happened was I I You know I wrote that letter that had this in cult of your mail and I said what can I get on and I came up with that letter Yeah, I didn't really like I wasn't walking around doing a Paul Schaefer impression. Yeah, you thought of what's the best thing? I guess an angle. Yeah, and Then I sent it in then a producer called me so you get a call, and this back in the day of answering the phone. Yeah, yes, yes, yes, answering, yes, it's pretty. So you get a call from a guy going,
Starting point is 00:23:08 hey, so and so from the David Letterman, from the Letterman show. Yeah, yeah, it's a woman from the Letterman show and she said, we wanna read your letter tomorrow or whatever day and I said, she goes, be ready at 4.30, five o'clock, whenever time it was. And I said, yeah, let's do it. And then, like they canceled it the last minute.
Starting point is 00:23:25 Okay. And my parents took me to Fridays to cheer me up. That's fucking so funny that you had, I'm sorry, David Letterman didn't call you dinner. So then they call me. At one point, Oreo cast, Oreo Sunday came out with like streamers on it. And you go, sorry, your favorite comedian didn't call you. So then like a few days later, shortly after they call back, I go, okay, we're gonna do it this week. So as you, now that you're a seasoned vet in comedy,
Starting point is 00:23:54 you know they scraped it from the show because it was like a good bit. And then probably at the last minute they're like, Oh, I mean, you could get scraped from the show when you're on the show. Exactly. But I mean, as an 18 year old, you're like waiting, waiting, waiting. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:06 And then to them, it seems probably, to you at 18, it probably seems so callous and mean that they're like, we're not doing your bit. And you're like, do you hate me? Yeah, I didn't take it personally. I didn't really take it personally. I would have absolutely taken it personally. I was so showbiz savvy at that point.
Starting point is 00:24:17 I mean, my God, you already had your delivery. I would have needed Fridays for a week. I would have been like, David Letterman hates me. But yeah, yeah, then he, I mean, that was the first, the call is the first time I've heard. I mean, we didn't like talk ahead of time. Okay, so they didn't do like a pre-call or? No, they just said he's gonna call at this, at this time.
Starting point is 00:24:34 So that was all he brought about him too. So I was by the phone, like in the kitchen, just shaking. Yeah, that was, yeah, that was all winged. And so, I mean, that shows you how great Letterman is. Yeah, he's really great. Yeah, he's great. So when he calls you, you do the thing, you get on the Letterman show. Yeah. Did you tell your friends you were going to do it? Yeah, I think I told a bunch of people, but this is also pre-internet. This is pre-texting. It's all word of mouth. Yeah, exactly. So you're like, I'm going to be on Letterman
Starting point is 00:25:00 tonight. Yeah. And then it gets scrapped. The first time it got cut, were your friends like, I thought you were just- I think I had enough notice where I didn't spread the word yet, I don't recall honestly. Because man, there's nothing worse than being like, you guys at school being like, you guys are gonna have your minds blown and then nothing happens.
Starting point is 00:25:16 I mean, I ended up doing stand-up on Letterman eight times if you're counting, but there were two bumps also and there was one of them two plus so ten total you did So you filmed ten sets. No, I filmed eight sets, but there were two times where I was there right give us One time I have I think the thing with those talk shows is like if he if he's talking to Julia Roberts and he goes too long And he just kind of gets into it 30 seconds over like you're done. Yeah,'re done. You're not on the job.
Starting point is 00:25:45 Yeah, if she's yammering about Nob Hill. And I wasn't on with her, but I, but yeah, like I remember once that one time, they said, they said, you're ready to bring you out there. I said, I'm just gonna go to the bathroom real quick. They said, go to the bathroom. I came out and they're like, yeah, you're bumped. Not cause I went to the bathroom,
Starting point is 00:26:01 just cause it walked into- Sorry, Dave doesn't want someone on the can to hold it. At the time I was peeing, a decision was made to bump me. But there was another time they bumped me and they brought me out. And so they came back from the commercial and I'm sitting there. Out on the couch.
Starting point is 00:26:16 Yeah, and he's like, this is Todd Barry. We didn't have time for his appearance. But he's appearing, I think it was a club in Seattle. Yeah. Giggles? No, this is pre-giggles. Okay. And they were like, so go see, so you still got the plug in?
Starting point is 00:26:29 Yeah, I got a plug in and I got to sit there and I got paid. That's awesome. I mean, it's always a mixed, I don't know, it's that, it's kind of that rush. I kind of got a rush when they canceled because they're like, ooh, anything I'm worried about is not gonna happen. I'm not gonna bomb because I'm not doing it.
Starting point is 00:26:43 Yeah, it's all, you know what it is? It's staying home from school. You're like, oh, nothing good or bad is gonna happen to me. Because I got cancer. I got something worse than getting bumped on Conan. Is I did Conan Island twice, only twice, no bumps. But worse, I filmed my first one, it was very fun,
Starting point is 00:27:06 Nate Barghetti was with me. The second one I was like, I'm a vet, I'll go alone. Big mistake. I was by myself, I was nervous, I didn't have anybody to talk to. And then after the second guest, I was getting ready to go out and the producer came and stopped me and went, hey,
Starting point is 00:27:22 we're actually filming Thursday show in pieces. So Conan's gonna change, interview another guest, and then we're gonna bring you out. Okay. And that zapped the audience. And so when I went out- You mean the moment, the- The moment, he had two guests,
Starting point is 00:27:39 and I think they probably should, I mean, I'm not telling them how to get to the show. Oh, I see what you're saying. They probably should have brought me out and then had the guest after me, but what they did should, I mean, I'm not telling them about the show. Oh, I see what you're saying. They probably should have brought me out and then had the guest after me, but what they did instead was Conan left, changed, came back, interviewed the guest for a Thursday show, and then changed back
Starting point is 00:27:53 and then brought me out to do the set. Right. And it didn't go well. Oh, really? Yeah, I promise. You could tell that they were like, it feels like extra, like you kept them after work. Like it was like that kind of feeling.
Starting point is 00:28:05 I kind of had a rough second appearance on that show. Yeah. Like where, I remember I did the set of the comic strip the night before and it destroyed. Sure. And then one of the jokes just didn't land and it almost to the point, I think I may have commented on it.
Starting point is 00:28:18 And I thought, oh man, I'm never gonna be asked back. And I guess they're because they're smart. Yeah. They know that that's gonna happen sometimes and not to punish me forever. Yeah, I think as a comic you think like this is it. Yeah, it's I mean but late night sets are so crazy because they they still exist but oh it's yes but what it was because I caught the tail end of it I caught I started in the early 2000s and it was still like get a
Starting point is 00:28:44 Conan set get a Leno set get a Letterman set Like get a set together because that was the ultimate Way to promote something. Yeah, I mean there was a time way back in the day when If you did I mean Stephen Wright did yeah the Tonight Show they brought it back the same week to do it again That's crazy, and he would turn into a theater act from a tonight show I mean they used to that's also like six channels at the time or whatever that's what I mean We so when you start in 1987 right? Yeah, and you're a Florida boy. Yeah
Starting point is 00:29:15 100 Florida born and raised. He's just a swamp thing born at Bronx Lebanon Hospital, you know, which is in Florida at Bronx Lebanon Hospital, you know, which is in Florida. Tom Berry, the swamp thing himself, the old Florida boy. When you start in 1987, is it like the goal, because you've called into Letterman, is the goal like I'm gonna get on Letterman? I never, no, because I mean, in Florida, I mean, not just talking like reminisce about the good old days, it was like.
Starting point is 00:29:42 No, that's basically what we do here. We talked about jokes and gigs. There was no like... There wasn't like... CAA was down in Florida. Yeah. In Fort Lauderdale at the Conkstrip. Look at the people. Yeah, they didn't care.
Starting point is 00:29:53 Yeah, there was no... You didn't even... It's crazy. His comedy, I think, now in the age we're living in, is the most profitable it's ever been. So that's why all these people are involved. Yeah. And back in the 80s, it was a nightclub act. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:04 And I mean, there was like your Lenos and Carlins who played theaters but yeah I am, your question was what man? So we were talking about when you move, when you get into comedy in 1987, you've called into Letterman, you love Letterman, what is the, there's no thought of, so when you move up here how do you get into comedy?
Starting point is 00:30:26 Because starting in New York is fucking insane. Yeah, I'll tell you, it took me a while to even like, like I did the open mic and it went really well, the first open mic. And this is down in Florida. Yeah, this is also, I mean, during the comedy boom, so they used to do the open mic at this particular club, a lot of clubs down there,
Starting point is 00:30:44 during the regular headliner week. So yeah, Sunday I'd be like you'd have your headliner and your middle act, but they'd also have like six guys six comics I shouldn't say guys six comics going up. Yeah, and So you played to the end is a comedy boom so people just like where to see comedy Yeah, the thing comedy when I started that's a little play to a real audience Yeah, when I started in Tucson, they would do at laughs. They would do the open mic starting at seven, right? Yeah. But then the show pro show would start at eight.
Starting point is 00:31:14 So what you were doing is as people came into the pro show, they would see comics open micers going up. So you got if you got good in the local scene in Tucson, you were going like second to last or last on the open mic. You were in front of a crowd. Yeah. And the MC loved it because the MC is like, oh, I'm I'm a professional and I'm following all these open micers. So it worked out on Thursday nights where it'd go like seven to 10 would be the pro show at like eight to 10. And yeah, it was awesome. And when I moved to New York, I was like, this is fucking a nightmare. Yeah, I don't open mics in New York. You were like, it was awesome. And when I moved to New York, I was like, this is fucking a nightmare.
Starting point is 00:31:45 Yeah, I don't. Open mics in New York, you were like, it's just comics and no one cares what you're saying. Right. I actually tried to, I mean, I'd say skip over, but I didn't really dive into the open mics. You know, I was the head of myself, I think, as some people are.
Starting point is 00:31:59 Yeah. And I remember like, you remember Vic Henley? Absolutely, I love Vic Henley. Yeah, rest in peace. Rest in peace, Vic was great. He helped me. Big Auburn Tigers fan. I worked in at the comedy corner in West Palm Beach,
Starting point is 00:32:15 which was a great club that got everyone. Yeah. And you know, he had helped me kind of get on at the catch rising star, but I, that wasn't like, they didn't love me there like sure occasionally but it would be like hey you know hang out you know just like oh come on buddy just hang out not him okay like the booker there would be like that was part of the culture like hang out maybe I'll put you
Starting point is 00:32:37 on like and you got that stuck around for so long humiliating because I I was part of the hangout phenomena too. You should still be hanging out. Go hang out. I like that. But stand up in New York, they'd be like hang out here. Like just hang out. Yeah, I don't see what the point of hanging out is.
Starting point is 00:32:57 I do though because I was so young when I moved here and I was doing check spots that sometimes someone would be late. Okay. And they'd be like, you know, Greg Giroldo's late. Like Greg's running like 10 minutes behind, but he's on his way. There used to be a set at the spot at the catcher and star. I forgot what it was called,
Starting point is 00:33:19 but it was that kind of thing where it was an on call type thing. But where you showed up, they gave you half the money, and if John Stewart's cab was caught caught in traffic, you go up. It's exactly what it was. You'd be like, not good enough to get booked on Saturday, or if John Stewart didn't show up, you're going on nine o'clock Saturday at the hottest club in the country. That's exactly it. That was exactly the situation where, but I wouldn't even get money. Stand by, that's what they call it.
Starting point is 00:33:42 Yeah, they'd give me like, I would hang out at the bar, Wayne Rado, this is when he was booking stand up in New York, and he would be like, hey, if so and so doesn't show, I'm going to give you seven minutes, and I would get free beer and like a free food. So it was almost like a food spot, which the seller used to do food spots. But that was kind of the stand up in New York food spot, spot was like hang out and it paid for me to hang out. And in worst case scenario, even if they did show up, they would give me the check spot, which is where for those of you don't know, during a showcase club, they drop the checks at the same time and everyone and a young comic goes up and I would just bomb. But they should not do that. But that's a whole separate. I'm pro check spot. You are? I'm pro check spot.
Starting point is 00:34:25 Oh my God, you're like a trader, man. At a showcase club, not a headliner club. Why? Well, they gotta pay the bill, they gotta turn the show over. Yeah. So to have it all condensed, I think the seller does it the best.
Starting point is 00:34:39 Yeah, but they drop it, they don't do a check spot. They do it at the end. Yeah, that's not a check spot. But I'm saying that every thing should be free. Yeah. No, I get it, they don't do a check spot. They do it at the end. Yeah, that's not a check spot. But I'm saying- I'm not saying that every drink should be free. Yeah. No, I get it. You're a socialist. Yeah. No. What I'm saying is I think there's value in a club having a check spot for a developmental spot for a comic.
Starting point is 00:34:56 I just feel like if I'm reading, if I'm hearing you correctly, I'm mirroring this, I learned in therapy. If what I'm hearing is that you think that it helps. But that's just saying, we're gonna give you a bad spot because you might have to do a bad spot. So somewhere else, like how about not doing a bad spot? Yeah, but how about learning, because I know what I learned
Starting point is 00:35:17 from doing a check spot was how to deal with a crowd that is not completely paying attention at all. So I would go and do other shows, I'd do bar shows, I'd do Brooklyn shows. I mean, you could find the value in that, but it's only, if there was no one doing a check spot, you wouldn't have to learn how to do a check spot. Can I tell you what I'm realizing right now?
Starting point is 00:35:34 That I got you good. Not really, but I'm starting to realize that I'm advocating for it the way someone who advocates for child abuse. Yeah, you sound like a club owner in 1991. Well, come on down to Dans in Florida, a real Florida club. We got freedom on the menu.
Starting point is 00:35:54 I just feel like I took such incredible beatings and it made me tough. Yeah, I mean, you definitely learned. Yeah, I definitely learned how to go on stage. Because I remember like I think like. I wasn't learning in the open mics. The open mics, no one's paying attention. No one was a hundred. I definitely learned how to go on stage. Because I remember like I think like. I wasn't learning in the open mics. The open mics, no one's paying attention. No one gives a shit.
Starting point is 00:36:09 It's comics waiting to go up to talk. But that's learning also, because you're like playing to an indifferent crowd. But in an indifferent crowd, but what I found was that if I went and I did the check spot, I could learn to see when they were paying attention. And then slowly but surely, I started getting good at check spots.
Starting point is 00:36:23 Well, I think what people should wish they would learn is that you should ignore as much as possible. Yeah. And what you will learn I think in any business is the ones that act like everything is awesome even when it's not and you're like what a psycho they always go successful. Is that a fake it to make it? Yeah. Those people you know sociopathic behavior, they, it does work. But anyway, there shouldn't be a check spot at clubs. No, we disagree. So what about headlining clubs? No, there should not be check spots.
Starting point is 00:36:53 There shouldn't be checks. But you're saying, I hate to keep you. Just in New York. You should be like a little trainee spot. Yeah. Like an intentionally bad spot. Yeah, yeah. I think, I mean, I sort of see what you're saying.
Starting point is 00:37:05 I'm just saying there's so many comics, there's so few spots, real spots at clubs that like if you really want to, because here's the thing, I was showing no one else wanted it. The MC was just gonna sit there and, you know, hand on the mic stand, what are you guys paying your checks,
Starting point is 00:37:21 and just wait it out. So if that's the case, get rid of it. Do it at the end. Don't interrupt the show. But if you need to do that, if you need to have a check spot, give it to a young comic. Let them bomb.
Starting point is 00:37:32 Yeah, okay. I don't think I'm going into this argument with you. No, and because I'm more seasoned by default win. Also maybe because you're a Florida guy. Oh, oh, like that? Okay, wow, this guy. I've never on a podcast, he's telling me to adjust my wardrobe.
Starting point is 00:37:50 Oh, is it? I understand you don't. Oh, my gut's hanging out? I think you're going. Can you cut that out? Yeah, we usually edit from like here up. Okay. Don't worry.
Starting point is 00:38:00 No, I appreciate it. There won't be too much. It's not another kind of thing. There'll be a ton of sex appeal on this episode. So when you come to New York and you start doing, you're hanging out at the catcherizing star. Yeah. Are you, the thought in your head of like,
Starting point is 00:38:13 I'm gonna get back to Letterman is never happening? That kind of just happened. Like I think Catch suggested I go up for them at some point. Really? Yeah, as much as I did, they didn't really take care of me I mean, but I you know, I'm gonna. I'm gonna retract that I Mean I probably thought I was better than I was sure you go in there and you're like you see someone do eight minutes I got eight minutes. I mean that's how I started. I don't know if I can saw people do comedy here. I can do that and
Starting point is 00:38:42 Yeah, you probably can't do eight minutes, but that person you're talking about could probably do 45 minutes. And you can't do 45 minutes. So there was certainly a little humbling that I needed, but yeah, I mean, I guess at some point, yeah, that I never really thought about, I gotta get on Letterman. You just were kind of like,
Starting point is 00:39:04 each day, oh, I'm just doing comedy. I think so, I mean, I hate to sound You just were kinda like each day, oh I'm just doing comedy. I think so, I mean I hate to sound so purist and so fright just but. No I get it. I'm not like you, no I can. You're not like you a podcast slut. Just going on whoever will let you plug,
Starting point is 00:39:17 doing your damn voices. But yeah, so then they auditioned me and I did, you know Letterman used to put you, you'd ask the guy to go on for like six auditions to get Letterman. Dude, I remember that. I remember when Eddie Bril would come around and by the time, he was like the final boss.
Starting point is 00:39:35 If he was coming around to watch someone set, you're like, oh, I think they're about to do Letterman. Yeah. And then sometimes I had friends like Joe List and Michael Che, they got called to do Letterman like unexpectedly. Oh, that's how I did my first Conan was the night before. Really? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:53 It was Louis who needed someone who was writing there. I think he goes, this guy Todd Barry's good. That's awesome. So they contacted me and the next day I was on, they came out that night. I did five sets in front of them. And I said, well, you know, we'll see you tomorrow. That is awesome.
Starting point is 00:40:06 Yeah. And it was just because Louis goes, oh, you should watch Todd A. Yeah, but I mean, it's just, but I mean, that's why you never know what's gonna happen, like if you think some play, some clubs like, why am I doing these clubs only 12 people?
Starting point is 00:40:19 Well, someone in that audience might think you're good, and they might be able to help you. Well, something that I grew up when I was, this is how young I am, young and spry. I was obsessed with comedians of comedy in that whole world. I got really into that. And like Gal Finax, The Purple Onion, and Demetri Martin.
Starting point is 00:40:40 Cause I loved comedy. That was a huge, I still do love it. But you were a big part of what was the alternative scene, the real alternative scene. I mean, like Rafifi. Yeah, I was part of that scene and I love that scene. But that's what, that's the question is I wanna ask you, how much of that was like kind of similar
Starting point is 00:41:02 to the Letterman thing where you're just doing comedy to just do it and you all of a sudden you're doing Letterman and you're doing comedy and all of similar to the Letterman thing where you're just doing comedy to just do it and all of a sudden you're doing Letterman and you're doing comedy and all of a sudden there's this thing of like, yeah, we're doing shows that aren't in clubs and they're going. Yeah, I mean, that was the thing. I never like, like, I never said I do alternative comedy
Starting point is 00:41:17 because I always thought that was silly. Like you're calling yourself an alternative comic. Yeah. And if someone wrote about me in a. Well, I have you in my phone as the godfather of alternative comics. Mr. Alt. I mean, I do have Mr. Alt. That of you is, and there's Todd Alt.
Starting point is 00:41:30 I have Mr. Alt tattooed. You have Alt life across your stomach, like Tupac. I'm no club comic. Yeah, dude, I remember, I'm telling you right now, that's when I moved here, and that shit on the lowest level where I was was palpable where people were going like, oh, you want to be a club comic. I mean, I think that was the dance.
Starting point is 00:41:49 I'm just trying to be a comic. The downside to some of the alternative scene, I will say the audiences were great generally. Sure. Above average. Well, because they were going there. They were going there to see something. They're not eating wings while they're watching you. You're getting more of a British crowd.
Starting point is 00:42:03 There's more of like even like a social scene after the show, which was nice, but. When did that start? God, that was fucking, Jesus, in the late, in the 90s, 80s? And was it just someone like, hey, we're doing a show at a bookstore and all of a sudden someone goes.
Starting point is 00:42:18 Yeah, it was a place called Rebar. I think that my manager at the time started it with someone else and Marin had something to do with it, I think. He was like one of the early adopters, or early champions of it. And then it moved to, I think it moved, then it moved to that place.
Starting point is 00:42:35 What the fuck was it? Luna Lounge. Yeah. And then, yeah, then it kind of took off. Then Rafifi and then. And then I did a show with David Cross and John Benjamin called Tinkle. They did it at Pianos, which was.
Starting point is 00:42:45 Okay, and then I, so you guys are just trying to do shows. Yeah, and it was just do something fun and different. And then you're just hanging out afterwards. Yeah, I always. And then all of a sudden it becomes this thing where everyone across the country is going like, well there's this thing called alternative comedy. Well there are a handful of people who just were like,
Starting point is 00:43:01 there was a thing that I didn't like about the alternative scene which was for some people, it just seemed like there was a thing that I didn't like about the alternative scene, which was, for some people, it just seemed like there was the glorified not trying. Yes. I'll tell you right now, as a comedy fan, the thing that I hated about it was this like, no attempt at being funny. It felt like.
Starting point is 00:43:21 Like no attempt at being funny and a passive aggressive attitude towards the audience of like you got like Too hip for the room. Yeah, and you definitely saw some of that And I remember like I went up at Largo the first time the original Largo Yeah, and there was like a music stand for people's notes, and I think at some point I did it I did a few jokes and I think I turned it around That's really funny. I think I'm gonna try to do this without notes. I see people go up there with their little napkin.
Starting point is 00:43:48 I'm gonna tell you something right now. I'm a genius. Yeah, A, sure. B, Joe DeRosa just did a show at Gramercy and he had a musical stand on there. Oh yeah. And I've been waiting to confront him about it. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:44:03 And I will, possibly on this podcast, confront him about it, because I will possibly on this podcast confront him about it because I'm like, what are you gonna do? You're gonna do an observation in C minor. Do you bring your viola? Yeah, what are you doing? You playing your fucking bait? I don't, I mean, there's some people who work with you. Hey guys, this is half comedy show, half cello recital.
Starting point is 00:44:23 Yeah, so, but I remember I made a joke about not using notes or something. I don't, it wasn't, and it wasn't a self congratulatory as it sounds, but. Yeah. And I remember everyone laughed because I think they were like, why, yeah, why? Because it also, I always thought that that
Starting point is 00:44:36 looked a little like, they just worked all day. You know, someone worked all day as a nurse and you need a little assistant to do seven minutes. You need a nurse for your jokes. Yeah, and to act like it's coming out of nowhere. The thing that did bug me was the, I think you know what, it's the same way that I get mad now about people who talk about haters or like, I'm going to get canceled for it. It's like this fake thing that people are implementing. Yeah, where there where it's not true
Starting point is 00:45:06 Right with comedy in the alt scene. It really was like Sorry, sorry, Adam. I'm not mainstream and I'm trying and you're like That's the thing I always tried like I did a because I would go to Lung Lounge into a brand new eight-minute bit of some sort And I would practice in my fucking apartment. Yeah, and there's people who just don't even like, why would I do that? I don't know to be good when you go to the stage. Well, it was like a contempt, not amongst all of them, but. And also the thing is like, I would see people, you know, do jokes at the Lunar Lounge or whatever you're like, yeah, I heard that fucking joke 1991.
Starting point is 00:45:41 I love that. I love when someone's trying to be alternative and they're being just really hacky where they're like, oh man, did you ever notice that women are addicted to capitalism at a rate, you mean women be shopping? I saw that on Def J, you know, just the way they phrase it where you're like,
Starting point is 00:46:01 you're doing a fucking simple bit that's right. I saw someone do a bit recently about like um do you know they go where am I at where am I where my black people at where my Asian people at then they go where my Jews at and then they clap and they go I wouldn't be clapping like that you guys said never again on the Holocaust and you go yeah dude that's like a shecky green joke like I've seen people be doing the like, or when they go like clap it up, if you smoke weed clap it up and they go,
Starting point is 00:46:31 lock the doors, arrest them. People do that as a throwaway joke, but I've seen people do that now, in the year of our Lord, 2024, as a legitimate bit. And you're like, dude, that is a fucking borsch belt joke. Right, right. So it's funny to see that it existed in the old world. I remember, I guess it's relevant.
Starting point is 00:46:54 I saw this woman I used to know a little bit, posted like about Tom Waits and Tom Waits said it best when he said a bottle in front of me is better than the bottle in the bottom. He's like, he may have said it best, but he didn't say it 2000 years ago when that was first said. Yeah, giving old statements. That's a 2000 year old joke. You know what I love is when, yeah, would they take someone modern and give them something
Starting point is 00:47:16 where you're like, that's not even, you didn't even look that up. Right. But they could have been quoting it. Right. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's the pretentiousness. I think it's the pretentiousness. But then there was also anti-pretentiousness,
Starting point is 00:47:27 pretentiousness, I thought. Like, I think I've heard the term anti-snobbery. Yeah. So I was like, oh, you wearing black, going down. And that's why I go, a lot of people would say to me, Todd, you're able to work both kinds of rooms. Like, that used to happen. I hate to, I've gotten that before.
Starting point is 00:47:44 I was like, the room with chairs over It was like the room with chairs over there and then the room with chairs over there. Was the mic in front of it? Yeah, it's like, I mean, I get what you're saying, but it's, if you can know, you know. There are, well, you know why people say that is because there are people in comedy that know how to pander properly to the right.
Starting point is 00:48:02 I saw people that, and I'm not gonna name names, but I saw people that got really big through being too cool for the room. And you've probably seen a ton of people like this. And then the industry believes it because they're just looking to make money. And then that person's career goes to shit because they're out on the road
Starting point is 00:48:23 having to do 45 minutes through an hour and they can't. Yeah. Because they're too cool. I think though, yeah, I see what you're saying. But I think the problem also with, which I liked about the alternative scene, there was a, you know, comedy was often presented in a real cheesy way. Yeah, it was rolled up sleeves, brick wall.
Starting point is 00:48:40 Brick wall, dumb name for your club. Yeah, just talking about how much you hate your wife. Yeah, so I mean. There's like real simple shit. I could see what and a lot of like, you know, there was certain like robotic-ness to some club comics. Yeah, I could. But at the same time, I mean, I always like to this is this is going to be a killer. But I always like to think about like the Ramones. Yeah. Like no one's really cooler than the Ramones. Yeah Ramones rehearsed like crazy Played their ass off decided how they were gonna walk out on stage Everything was a everything was a rehearsed thing right they didn't just like saunter out of the moon Like they had like from what I understand if you fucked up and you were the Ramones, it is a long van ride
Starting point is 00:49:25 to the next. That's correct. You know what's funny is I never knew that. I didn't know that. That's what I heard something like, they were pretty rough on each other. Well, it's like, it's good to know that Joey Ramone was like James Brown and his band fucked up.
Starting point is 00:49:35 They got a, he like, find them. Oh, right. Like James, oh dude, there's a great James Brown clip. I don't think it's at the Apollo, but it's from like 1962 or whatever, where one of his guys plays Maybe maybe a fraction of a second too long and James Brown's like he looks at him And you could just see everyone's like he's in big fucking trouble
Starting point is 00:49:54 Like if you fucked up in James Brown's band you had to pay money and he would fucking scream at you I got a good James Brown story to let it I love it James Brown story really funny my friend was I guess I could say this is not really he's dead It's not mean My friend was on remember Miami Vice. Yeah, my friend was on Miami Vice with James Brown I think Chris Rock was in the episode really. Yeah, and James Brown had this Line or something like what were you doing last night? And he would say, I spent the last night in the arms
Starting point is 00:50:25 of an easy chair couch potato. That was his line. Sure. This is the way he delivered the line like several times. Yeah, I'm afraid I spent the last night in the arms of a easy chair, potato couch. You know, caught James, it's couch potato. He goes, that's potato couch.
Starting point is 00:50:42 It's potato couch. What's crazy about James Brown is like, you're famous in a way where no one said no to you in over three decades. Yeah, I mean, there's certain people who are, yeah, exactly. Like when you meet famous people like that, where you're like, oh, no one's ever been like.
Starting point is 00:50:59 Yeah, someone like Madonna. Yeah, with the like, hey, you look crazy. Like maybe don't wear lingerie out to. No one's gonna say Madonna. Maybe start the show within a half hour of the show. Yeah, that's wild I always wondered that like axle roses friend if you're like friends with axle rose you go You don't have to be 90 minutes late. You can be on time. Yeah, cuz when you're here's the thing as My fiance Katie. She's late all the time. I have friends that are late all the time.
Starting point is 00:51:27 It's never a purposeful, fuck them, I'm gonna be late, is I'm doing this and I over, I didn't clock manage why. Axl Rose, that kind of shit, Madonna showing up late, that's intentional. You think so? You're a performer. You have all the information. You know when the show starts. You know when you're supposed to be there.
Starting point is 00:51:46 Yeah, I mean, I just never, I wouldn't be able to relax if I was keeping someone waiting two hours. I would be, my first song would be called I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You guys, I really do apologize. And also you do potentially walk out to people who are kind of angry, you know?
Starting point is 00:52:01 Well, I mean, I think that's what's interesting about the Metallica Guns N' Roses tour back in the 90s where you see it, Metallica was like, we had to put in our contract, we're going first because we're not gonna let Axl Rose be 90 minutes late and then they have to go first and then now we gotta play two hours later. So, and that was like a big part of a problem
Starting point is 00:52:23 with the contract. I mean, I also don't think I'd wanna follow Guns N' Roses either. Yeah follow them right after appetite for destruction no thanks. Yeah when you're metallic you have four albums to their one so you've got a set list. Yeah they could follow anyone but they could follow anyone but you're right following Guns and Roses is like hey you want to do some time in between you're asking for you know more hey your host thing can you go're like asking faith a little more. Hey, you're hosting, can you go? You do a couple of jokes.
Starting point is 00:52:46 But Nirvana didn't want to go on the road with them because of that. They asked Nirvana to open that tour. Oh, really? And Kurt Cobain was like, well, he had a problem with axle rows. But also their thing was like, yeah, they're dicks. We don't want to go on the road with dickheads.
Starting point is 00:52:59 Yeah, yeah. Have you ever turned down going on the road with someone that was huge because they were a dickhead? Like back in the day, like someone that we wouldn't expect like was Louis Anderson. He was actually very nice. Yeah, that'd be funny though. He's like, hey, Todd, here's how I run a tight ship.
Starting point is 00:53:18 No, I've never really, I haven't really worked with any like huge asshole. I mean, I've met assholes, but as far as comics, the vast majority are pretty nice. Even the old school guys? Yeah, I mean, met assholes, but of course comics, the vast majority are pretty nice. Even the old school guys? Yeah, I mean, I've never... Yeah, I mean, it's not like open for Shacky Green or something. Yeah, that's what I wanted to say. But I need even those guys. I've met some of those Catskill guys and they're usually gentlemen. They're very like, hello, Todd. Hello, son. What was that guy? You tell jokes and I like that.
Starting point is 00:53:42 What's that guy? Berman? Not Berman. Fuck, there was this one of those. Some guy named Abe probably. One of those famous Catskill guys. Yeah, they're always named like Abe or Monty or something in old school name. He was at Caroline's once and he was just very like, hey, you have, like the attitude you have on stage. Like he was very polite.
Starting point is 00:54:01 I love that. Yeah. I love a old dog. I love an old, I mean like, that's why I loved Vic Henley because by the time I moved here He was kind of older, you know, and he was like man I used to hang out with Hicks and I get drunk with Bill Hicks. He was a wild boy And you're like I just love as a young comic very new to New York. I was like more. I loved stories. Yeah Yeah, I was my Ben Creed. I used to open for Ben.
Starting point is 00:54:25 Oh, wow, I haven't read that name in a while. Ben Creed, well, I met him in Tucson. He was living in Tucson. That's where he was living when I met him. Cause he was a New York guy. Yeah, yeah. He was here in the 80s. I forgot about him.
Starting point is 00:54:35 Ben Creed, I think he lives in Texas now. But he would tell me stories when we were on the road in Tucson. Just doing casinos and shit. And he'd be like, yeah, I went to, I saw Star Wars, I saw Empire Strikes Back with Jerry Seinfeld and you're like, what? And you're not realizing they're just like regular guys
Starting point is 00:54:51 that like went and saw a movie, but to me I was like, do you had lunch with Superman? It was nuts. Yeah, I remember Barney Miller, the show Barney. Like, you remember Steve Landisburg? No. What was he on the show? Fuck, I forgot. Who was he on the part of the show?
Starting point is 00:55:06 Anyway, he did stand up and they were like, at the comedy quarter in Westburn, like, hey, can you drive him to his hotel? Like, yeah, we should drive him to his hotel. That was like the guy that played Biff in Back to the Future. Tom, it's not Tom Jones. He's a comedian. Tom, he's very nice, but I've never worked with him, but Joe List worked with him.
Starting point is 00:55:26 Joe List is a huge Back to the Future fan. And this is like 15 years ago. And I was like, you got to work with Biff? And he goes, you're not allowed to talk about it. I said, what? He said, in the green room, you're not allowed to bring up that he was Biff on Back to the Future. And you're like, son of a bitch.
Starting point is 00:55:43 That's the only thing I want to talk about. You think I want to talk about bits with you. I want to know what it's like to get over there was was that real manure? Dude, I appreciate you coming and hanging out done. Yeah, domestic short hair is the special on YouTube. Yeah, it's fucking awesome. It is man, I watched it and I Was like, you know, I watched the specials and I'm always like, yeah, it's gonna be pretty good. I usually enjoy it, but those fucking jokes are so tight. Thank you. And it's so, so funny. Like I said, the Italians dressing joke really made me laugh hard.
Starting point is 00:56:14 Thank you. Um, more than Wiley's a big fan. Yours. I don't know if you know that him and I heard John Long's coming out to a couple of shows, uh, Todd Berry.com. Yeah. And I have a, I'm on tour. So out to a couple shows. ToddBerry.com. Yeah, and I have a Montour, so check that out. Live, go see Todd Live. We didn't talk about crowd work at all, holy shit.
Starting point is 00:56:30 Well, yeah, everyone talks about crowd work. Yeah, yeah, we don't have to talk about it. And without Todd Berry, there's no Matt Reif. Remember that. Yeah. He laid the scene. You remember Alt General, Todd Berry? You remember the Commodore of the Alt scene as Todd says off
Starting point is 00:56:48 air? It would be fun. I'm going to make it seem like you pushed that we talked about it. He said he would only come on here if we talked about the Alt scene. If you don't refer to me as an Alt comic, that's one thing I ask, is I need to see burgers and alt. My favorite, obviously, appearance of yours in anything was Bob's Burger as the cow. Oh, Melissa, yeah. Yeah, I loved that
Starting point is 00:57:06 I was very high in my apartment in Queens watching Bob's Burgers and I went that's Todd Berry You could try watching it not high maybe no, no, I'm good also Delocated. Yeah, that show is so that was my shit. Yeah I loved to delocated and the whole introduction of Eugene Merman and you and his brother being the badass Russian mobster Aided you. Yeah, was that guy cool who the guy put the Russian mobster? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that was fun Yeah, I loved that. I fucking love is that streaming anywhere? I get residuals. So I think it is dude. I'm looking up Delocated was so goddamn funny. Thank you. I just remembered the absolute responsibility for you enjoying that show
Starting point is 00:57:48 Yeah, when John when John's character goes through the sandwiches because he's trying to get the punch card of the 10th sandwich might be One of my favorite episodes of anything I've ever watched You rule Todd. Thanks for having me man. Yeah, dude you

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