Something Was Wrong - S14 Ep11: Being Soft is Hard as F*ck

Episode Date: December 22, 2022

*Content warning: emotional, sexual and physical violence, child abuse, sexual coercion, non-consensual pornography, suicidal ideation.  SIGN THE S14 PETITION HERE:  https://chng.it/BQVyQdJ4gmFor info on how to report a crime related to this season and share related crime tips with our team, please visit somethingwaswrong.com/14 For free and confidential resources, please visit: somethingwaswrong.com/resources For more information & to purchase the replay of Something Was Wrong Live please visit: www.moment.co/SWW To purchase SWW S14 merch, please visit: represent.com/store/somethingwaswrongArtwork by the amazing Sara Stewart @GreaterThanOkay - Instagram.com/greaterthanokayFollow Something Was Wrong on Instagram @SomethingWasWrongPodcastSWW’s theme music – U think U by Glad Rags, from their album Wonder Under

If you're serious about growing this new year, what you put into your mind actually matters. And as someone who lives and breathes careers and self-development, even I get overwhelmed trying to do it all. Between work, life, and trying to better yourself, self-care can start to feel like just another thing on the to-do list. But investing in yourself doesn't have to be complicated. And with Audible, it isn't. It's time to take care of you. And who better to help than the top voices in well-being all in one place. With Audibles Well-Being Collection, you can level up your career, finances, relationships,

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Kickstart your well-being journey with your first audiobook free when you sign up for a 30-day trial at outable.com. Membership is 1495 a month after 30 days. Cancel any time. There's more to imagine when you listen. This season, guests will be sharing

their own testimony in regards to the criminal allegations against Jake Gravbrot. All persons are assumed to be innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Guess experiences are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of myself, something was wrong, or wondering.

At the time of this episode's airing, Jake Gravbrot has not responded to our request for comment. If you have been a victim of Jake Gravbrot or have a crime tip in relation to these matters, please visit Something Was Wrong.com for more information. All names of minors involved in this. this story have been changed for their privacy and protection. Some survivor names have also been

changed for anonymity and safety purposes. Season 14 covers a variety of mature topics that can be upsetting, such as emotional, physical, and sexual violence. Content warnings for each episode and resources for survivors can be found in the episode notes. The podcast or any linked materials should not be construed as medical advice, nor is the information a substitute for professional medical expertise or treatment. Thank you so much for listening. After the Jake Instagram page was getting a lot of attention, and obviously he was not happy about its existence.

My five-year restraining order for Ivy was coming up to the five-year mark. I started to feel like, oh, man, I've not lived in fear of him for a while because he's been out of our lives and there's been no contact, but there had been no contact because there had been a five-year restraining order and a one-year restraining order prior to that. It was almost six years total that there was a restraining order in place. And I decided I need to find out if I can renew this because I'm really uncomfortable not having that in place. So I contacted the prosecutor's office. They told me where I needed to go and how I needed to do it. So I went in the day before that order was set to expire and filed for a new one.

And they granted me an emergency restraining order on Ivy's behalf. And I left with a hearing date for two weeks later. Now, he hasn't attempted to contact me in all of those years. I'm pretty confident that he wants nothing to do with me. He wants nothing to do with Ivy. I go into court. It's now mid-April. The hearing was two weeks later.

I go into court, almost sick to my stomach. We had a group chat going with Kaelin and Sarah and Mimi, and they were being so encouraging, and they all wished that they could be there with me. My mom went with me because I was petrified that he was going to show up. Even though I didn't really think that he was going to show up, there was that chance that he would show up and I don't want to be anywhere near him. Even hearing his voice in person is too much for me. I just can't do it. I get there and I'm

feeling pretty good because he's not there. So I'm instantly like relieved. He's not there. We get into the courtroom. They start. He's still not there. But there's also a TV screen with people appearing by Zoom. I can see the names. His name isn't up there. They finally call my name and they inform me. He's hired a lawyer and the lawyer speaks and explains that she's filed a declaration on his behalf and wasn't sure if it had been filed properly. And the judge said that she did not receive it and had no record of it. So the lawyer asked the judge, well, can I just email it to you?

And the judge looked absolutely flabbergasted by it. And she said to the lawyer on Zoom, I am not going to give you my personal email address. You can go back to the clerk and file it the way that you were supposed to. She apologized to me and said, I'm sorry, because they haven't filed that. They have to give that to you ahead of time. We're going to have to move you to the end and let everybody else go. So I had to sit there all morning and just, you know, my anxiety, my PTSD was horrendous the whole time. And I'm not prepared, which was So stupid on my behalf, but I really didn't think that he would fight it. I did not understand why he would fight it because he doesn't want anything to do with us. So why would you care? I think he was looking more like on a background check, how bad it would look. I don't know. That's my only guess is that he doesn't want it to show up as a restraining order. Everybody else goes and they finally call us up and I get up there and she explains there's going to be opening arguments, closing arguments. And I'm just beside myself because I can hear him on Zoom now.

He's not appearing with his camera on. And the judge even told him, I don't like it when people appear in my courtroom via Zoom with their cameras turned off because I cannot see your face. It's hard for me to judge credibility when I can't even see you. And he refused to turn it on. So she just kind of, okay, fine. And moved forward.

She asked me for my opening statement and I literally could not even speak. the anxiety was so bad that I was like, uh, you know, just unable to get words out. And I finally asked her, is there any way that I can ask for a continuance so I can come back with witnesses? If he's going to challenge this, I want to bring in people that can speak more to his state of mind in the last five years. I haven't had any contact with him, so I can't actually firsthand tell you what kind of person he is now, but I know other people that can. His lawyer objected and said, we will not agree to any continuation of this and no witnesses. We're not doing that. This is a big waste of time. We shouldn't even be here. I did get his declaration

and I'll go ahead and read it. I was so forward by all of this. He said, in his declaration, I declare I have had no contact with Melissa or my daughter since the agreed order was entered five years ago. I have no intention to contact either of them in the future. When my daughter is older, I will be open to the lines of communication being restored if appropriate. Since entry of the underlying order, which was entered by agreement and without a hearing, I successfully completed DV treatment in 2017 and have provided proof. Life has been peaceful overall, despite the uncertainty of the pandemic itself. I have been able to focus on my career and help tell important stories through my work as a photojournalist.

My passion for photography has been fulfilled through endeavors like this, as well as in opportunities to travel the country and internationally. And then the second page ends with, Petitioner does not have any reason to be afraid of me as she has not had any contact with me for over five years. I live in the city of Seattle about two hours away from her. There is no reason to extend this protection order

as it would only serve to restrict my freedom unnecessarily. and it was signed in Seattle, Washington, 411, 2022. He clearly did not tell his lawyer what the whole story was to begin with because she kept saying in court that I was wasting their time, that this was a total waste of time, there's no basis for any of this, because he was trying to go off of the story that when he tried to file the restraining order against me back in 2015,

my lawyer negotiated it into family court and we did an agreed no contact in family court. That's what he's referring to in this. He's acting like there wasn't an actual five-year restraining order. And so she's arguing this was a no-contact order. It was in family court. There's no reason for any of this. And the judge interrupted her and said, this was not an agreed-upon order. This was a restraining order from a criminal conviction. There was a five-year restraining order in place. The judge turned to me and said, is this correct? And I said, yes, and the five-year restraining order was going to run out the day before I filed for a new one. I'm just trying to extend it.

And the lawyer says, oh, well, then I'm going to motion to move this to family court because this is a domestic issue. And the judge said, no, it's not a domestic issue. We're going to continue on, denied her motion to dismiss. She talked to Jake and she asked him when it was his turn to make his opening statement. The judge asked him, Mr. Grabbrot, were you charged with a crime in relation to your daughter? And his response was, I don't remember. She said something to the effect of Mr. Grabbrot. Did you go to jail for assaulting your daughter?

And then he said yes. I could already tell at that point that the judge was over this whole thing. and he again said, I have no intention to contact her. I want nothing to do with her, obviously. Like, I haven't attempted to contact. Why would she even think that she needed a restraining order? I haven't attempted even once to contact her in five years. At that point, she gave me a chance to make my closing argument.

And my closing argument was, yeah, he hasn't made an attempt to contact me in five years. He's not lying there. But the reason being is there's been a restraining order in effect the entire. time, there has not been a lapse in it. And I absolutely fear for my daughter's safety. I fear for my safety. She asked me, have there ever been any domestic violence incidents against you with him? And I told her there was an incident with my car where he attacked my car with me inside. I said, that was a Seattle PD case that ended up being dismissed because we declined to press charges. And she said, okay, she pretty quickly ruled that there's more than a

enough evidence that there's been severe domestic violence in all of this. And so she said, I'm going to go ahead and grant the restraining order for your daughter. She told me that I had proved that there had been domestic violence towards me. And so she added me to the order as well, which was not even what I had gone in for. The original order didn't include me. It was just Ivy. So I was a little bit blown away that she took all of that information and decided that not only is a danger to your daughter, I think he's a danger to you as well. She gave him the whole spiel of if you contact her or attempt to contact her or even drive by her house or anything along those lines, you know that it will result in you potentially going to jail. And he literally laughed and said,

I would never, obviously, I don't want anything to do with her. And the judge rolled her eyes and said, well, keep it that way. No contact means no contact. And he hung up at the that point from the Zoom. The whole thing was interesting because he obviously lied to his lawyer because she had no clue. I don't think it was necessarily her fault, but she kind of looked like an idiot in court because she didn't even know the history of what the restraining order was or why it had been issued in the first place. She was going off of whatever bullshit lie he had told her and ran with that. And obviously it wasn't anywhere near the truth. I think the judge was annoyed by that, but I could see that most likely it was him not being honest with her.

So that did not turn out well for him. It was not, I went into court with no documentation, none of my records, none of my proof without a lawyer. And I won more than what I was even asking for when he had a lawyer. Obviously, she didn't perform that great for him, which how could you when your client is lying about everything to you? But it was interesting to me that that's the lawyer that he's hired now. Good morning, good morning. Happy Friday, everyone. Sorry for the voice memo, but my freaking voice to text always is like so atrocious. I don't have any solid updates for you yet, except for that I've been going through all the boxes of evidence, getting things ready for my initial contact with Seattle PD, which I will hopefully be making today.

So I've been doing some research on Seattle PD And in the last two months Actually there's been all these articles That I saw about how understaffed Seattle PD is And that the sex crime unit has been specifically understaffed All this to say, do not lose hope Because I'm just going to go directly To the media representative

Then I'll reach out to sex crimes I don't even know if I'll be able to get somebody on the phone today But I will keep you updated depending on whether or not they feel like they want me to bring the evidence up there, whatever, I may either fly or drive to Seattle. Sunday or Monday, it just depends on what takes place. I'll contact the Seattle FBI office or go there in person. So still a lot of balls up in the air.

But yeah, I'm excited to get started on this next phase of like getting this fucker. The non-consensual pornography seems like our best bet in conviction. If you're calling the Seattle Division of the Federal Bureau investigation. If you do not wish to be recorded, please press 1 to learn how to submit a tip online. During this call, you will be asked to provide identifying information about yourself and or the persons about whom you are calling. We use this information to assist in investigating your tip. You do not have to provide your name or other personal information.

However, the lack of information may delay will hurt our ability to investigate your tip. Any information you can provide. may be used for authorized purposes. Please provide the zip code of the area you are calling from now. One moment while I transfer you to the next available representative. Your call will now be recorded. Thank you for calling the FBI. May I please have your first and last name?

Hello, my name is Tiffany Reese, R-E-E-S-E. Okay, so what federal violationary inclined to report today? Well, I am a victim advocate and documentarian based in Sacramento, California. I essentially create audio documentaries. And for the past seven months, I've been interviewing and collecting evidence on an individual who is based in Seattle, and the crimes were all perpetuated in the Seattle area.

And what's their name? What's the perpetrator? His name is Jake, J-A-K-E, and his last name is Grav-B-R-B-R-O-T. Do we have any identifiers on him? Yes. His birthday is March 28th. I believe he's approximately 42 years old.

He is 6'4, 250 pounds, white Latino male with tattoos head to toe. He actually was fired from converged meat. Are you in the Seattle area? No, you've reached the National Threat Operation Center. We do all the intake calls for all of the... Okay, got you. He actually was a well-known photographer in the Seattle area but was fired due to some of the survivors coming forward and putting pressure. And that's how I started to become aware of the story and began interviewing women.

So I have boxes and boxes and boxes of evidence and weeks' worth of recorded interviews with all the victims. I have a box folder ready to go with all the evidence digitally. Let's start with what did Jake do? Well, first he has been convicted of abusing children in Seattle County. He was sentenced to 30 days for hitting a two-year-old with excessive force. He's admitted to hitting another child. But what I am trying to essentially hold him accountable for is decades long of non-consensual pornography. What we basically have discovered is that he has his entire apartment covered in cameras. He uses dating apps and uses sympathetic stories, lies, and manipulation to coerce women to come to his apartment or he takes them on a date, pretends he forgets his wallet, et cetera, brings them to his apartment, has sex with them, both consensually and non-consensually, and we believe films it. I have testimony from women that he started filming them before asking for consent. We have at least eight women on record

with the non-consensual pornography. We also have domestic violence. documented testimony from multiple victims on that, alleging he has done things from pushing, choking to the point of almost losing consciousness. He loves to grab women around their throat. He loves to try to take their phones and tell them they can't call 911. Okay, quick question. Have you contacted local law enforcement about this? I have called Seattle PD so many times. I can't even tell you. I've called Seattle Department's Media Line, left several messages. I've called their sex crimes unit, left several messages. No one has made any attempt to call me back.

Now, I know they're severely understaffed based in the news, and that's well documented since June 2020, and allegedly the sex crime unit was impacted the most. I'm hoping that the FBI could be a better solution, considering he's using these dating apps. The dating apps don't do anything about it to remove him. So that's why the victims came together and essentially reached out to me and I've been working with them. Okay. Are any of these people underage? The two children that he hit were under age. None of the sex crimes involved any minors that I know of. Okay.

Do you have any consent laws in the state of Washington, though? Certain states, even if the victim is 18 years old, if the perpetrator is like 10, 20 years older than them, there are certain consent parameters around that, but I don't know that Washington state has those. That would be local law. We deal mostly with federal. Okay, now for the children that he hit, he did go to jail for abusing the one, correct? Yes, he did go to jail for abusing the one. He admitted to hitting the other. I'm going to put you on hold for a second, and I'll be right back. Tiffany, yes. I just need to ask you a couple clarifying questions. Okay, so none of this happened on federal property.

The majority of the crimes were perpetrated was in downtown Seattle. Okay. Now, you said that the Seattle Police Department are, that there's crimes unit is grossly understaffed. That's just what I read in the news. June of 2022, there's all these articles that came out saying Seattle PD is significantly understaffed and that it's impacting the crime rate. These were legitimate news sources reporting this. So when I started reaching out to them, I started digging into that a little bit more.

And I was like, oh, well, this might be why I'm not getting a call back because it sounds like that department is the most understaffed. Okay, did you reach out to the Washington State Police? I did not reach out to the State Police. Would you like their number? Sure. Because from everything that I'm saying, that is going to be your best avenue. Okay.

Thank you so much. I'll get it documented on my end. Like I said, I do believe the Washington State Police is going to be your best avenue. Wonderful. Thank you. Thank you. Have a great day. You too.

Bye-bye. For contacting the Washington State Patrol. Hi. Hello. Can you hear me okay? Yeah. Okay. Okay.

Okay, Melissa's joining. I'm here. Hi. Oh, my God. Hi. I don't know if I imagine Sarah's probably working. She had to do a bunch of stuff, so I'm going to fill her in. Okay, okay. So I got through to the FBI.

They basically, like, took a bunch of high-level information. She put me on hold for a while, and then she came back, and she said, so did any of these crimes happen on federal land? And I was like, no. Perhaps they could have no. National Park. I was going to say Sarah was this. him on those trips and then there was somebody else right melissa yeah i feel like he had probably

a woman on every trip that he took to a national park you can't like say for sure but it would not surprise me if he had filmed a woman inside a national park which would be federal land wouldn't it yeah yeah okay i'll circle back to them with that that's really good thinking she was like your best bet, whatever that means, is Washington State Police. I called the number that she gave me, and they don't even have an option to, like, report a crime on their call line. But I just wanted to call and explain it over the phone because that's easier. Melissa, do you remember whom it was? There was somebody that you took on the road trip, and he was yelling at her on the car. Pistemite, I think. That's what I thought. I thought they went to a national park. Yeah, it was Northern

California. And he also went to Joshua Tree, didn't he, with Sarah? He went to a bunch of places with Sarah, but I don't know that he, like, was abusive in those places. It's worth looking into that, though, especially because it's so documented, too, right? All of his national park stuff. Hi, this is Detective Boat the Seattle Police Department returning your call. Please give me a call back at... Or if it's easier, you can send me an email with the information you have. Thank you.

September 27, 2022, after receiving this voicemail, I sent over an email, which I read at the beginning of this season, including all the collected evidence, recorded interviews, and timeline of events in a digital storage folder. We had hoped by giving the Seattle PD and FBI this evidence before reaching out to Jake for comment, that we might be able to get a search warrant for his cameras and hard drives. However, weeks went by with the only update being that the evidence was received and passed, on to the detective supervisor, a sergeant in the Seattle PD sex crimes unit. I sent Jake Gravbrot the following text message. Hello, Jake.

My name is Tiffany. I am an advocate and documentarian. For the past seven months, I've been collecting testimony, alleging a decade of abuse and crimes perpetuated by you. Before the documentary is released, I'm reaching out to you for written comment or interview. I tried calling you, but your voicemail is full. Thank you. He hasn't texted me back or anything, but wait, let me check.

He has not. I'm kind of surprised. I'm not. I'm not. I'm actually heading back to the bay this weekend, but I'm going to bring my recording stuff with me and Casey calls me back. If he wants to do an actual sit-down interview, if he wants to just call me and yell at me, I'm just going to record that on the spot, obviously.

Maybe you should ask him if he would like an opportunity to cry for the document. right? What the fuck do you have to say for yourself? When are you going to get help, dude? I just want him to like verbally say how Melissa didn't trap him. Oh my God, please. Like, I would love, I would love for him to agree to an interview so we could just go line by line. So in this text message here, where you're asking about pregnancy on a toilet seat, and Exhibit 27 when you pissed yourself, and Exhibit 28 when you pretended that you were hit by a car. I have this staff. I have this staff. in front of me of just every person's transcript. It's highlighted and there's those little flag stickers for everything he's done that's illegal just sitting in

front of me. So my plan was just be like, well, where do you want to begin? Jake, should we start with Kaylin or do you want to go back further? Let me know because I've got about two dozen stories here to ask questions about so you just let me know where you want to start. It'll be like, you're all lying. It's a witch hunt. Yeah, I'll definitely keep you guys updated. Appreciate you like hopping on. Yeah. Thank you. Okay. All right. Thank you. Talk soon.

Love y'all. All right. Talk soon. Bye. Bye. Hi. This message is for Tiffany Reese. My name is Leah Alters.

I'm an attorney and I represent Jake Gravrodot. And I'm calling your response to your message that you sent him regarding a documentary that you are putting together. I'm calling because I'd like to talk to you about that. If you would, please, give me a call back at your convenience. My direct line is... And I'm also calling to ask you. please not contact Jake directly from here on out. You can deal with myself and my associate, Rebecca,

in regards to any kind of interaction with Jake. Again, Leah L. Perth and my direct line is... Let's set up the time you talk next week. You can text me at this phone number as well, and I look forward to your response. After receiving this voicemail from Jake's lawyer, I sent her a text message saying, Hello, I received your message.

Thank you for letting me know that you're again representing Jake. I will submit my questions for Jake for comment to your best email if you can provide it. Thank you. She responded with her email address and the following week I sent a 15-page document outlining all of the allegations against Jake for comment. We never received a follow-up response. I again followed up with the Seattle PD on October 24, 2022 and was told that the sergeant had been sent the digital box file of evidence.

What have your thoughts been like the last week or so with the police and the lawyers and all of these developments? I'm curious to hear what it's been like for you. I'm always cautiously optimistic. I feel like I've been waiting for so long for real accountability. I think we got a little bit of accountability when he went to jail. But it was such a short period of time that I don't feel like it really was, if that makes sense. It was not enough for what had happened. And that was literally one incident compared to all the terrible shit that he's done to people over the years.

It's really disheartening to sit and watch somebody get away with that kind of stuff for so long. I'm really optimistic the direction all of this is going that maybe we will actually get real true accountability. Not just for the kids, but for all of the women that he's hurt. I'm hoping that obviously everything that you sent over was so incredible and the way that it's laid out. I don't know how you could look at all of that and think, oh yeah, there's no case here. There's just so much. There's so much evidence. There's so many stories.

There's so many different victims involved. We don't even know all of them. I'm really anxious to see what happens with all of it. As of the airing of this episode, Thursday, December 22, 2022, we have still not received any updates from the Seattle PD or the FBI. To our knowledge, they have not reached out to a single victim to investigate these matters. The last email I sent to the sergeant was on Friday, December 16, 2022. Hello, Sergeant. I'm following up as it has been months since I sent over the box folder full of testimony and evidence, and have heard from the victims that no one has been contacted.

Is anything being done in this matter? It's extremely concerning to me that this person is still walking around without any consequences, still on dating apps and still endangering women and children. We will be creating a petition that our listeners can sign to help move these matters forward. There are so many victims and they deserve justice. Thank you so much, Tiffany Reese. And friends, we need your help. We've created a purpose.

petition to try and help bring attention and action to these matters. The direct link to the change.org petition can be found on our website, something was wrong.com, and is also linked in today's episode notes. Please, please, please sign and share the petition, the press release, the podcast, it all helps as we continue to seek justice for the survivors. When Tiffany said that she was going to bring all this to the police, I was hopeful, but, but not really like expecting very much, which is terrible. But I feel like we've been failed by the system so many times that this was just another thing where I was hoping they would do the right thing

and it doesn't feel like they are. I don't know what will happen by the time we get to your episodes. I originally connected with the detective in Seattle. He did respond to my emails very promptly, but then like I go in box today because I had, reached out again via email. I'm like, hey, you know, what's up? What's going on here? And he's like, I forwarded the information to my supervisor. Then I go to box today to like share the box with the supervisor because in my mind I was like, wait, he can't just send her the box. Like, I have to send

her the box. She can't open it. I go in there because I was going to add some stuff to it. And he hasn't even fucking opened it. He hasn't even fucking opened it. He didn't even accept the invitation or fucking open it. I sent it to her. She opened it right away, the sergeant. So hopefully that means that somebody's going to give a fuck here at some point. I wish I could say I was surprised. I'm not. I think you're a lot more understanding and empathetic towards their workload and stuff. However, I'm very much on the side of I don't expect them to do their jobs. They have a poor reputation. I think that the responding to the email and forwarding to the higher ups there is just to save his ass. like that he did something,

but he doesn't even care enough clearly to like click in and see anything for himself. I don't think these people care. My fear all along has been if he thinks that he's being investigated, that he'll wipe all of those hard drives. And I don't know, are they able to retrieve that? He's obviously possessive

over things that he feels are his, but also I think those videos and pictures are away their trophies, for one. I absolutely believe that. But it's also a way for him to continue to have control over women, even after they're long gone. It's disgusting. I call my stepdad of my mom. My parents are just so, so amazing.

And I don't know what I would have done if they didn't help me when I left Jake. I'm so grateful. I think this podcast will be hard for my mom to listen to. But it's also been so nice for her to know the truth. and for her to understand it better that it wasn't just me. We all were manipulated. There's so many of us. She's been my greatest support system.

If I call my mom at any time, she's there for me. And the same goes from Melissa. Like, there's never a time where I can't reach out to her. And Melissa will give me the shirt off her back. If I needed something, she would be there. And so it's really cool to have that. I love that. That's amazing.

The last piece that I would like to get into is thanking you so much for everything that you have done and all of the support that you have offered to all of these other women, the bravery that you have shared, the commitment you have made to providing me with everything I need. You guys have done such an incredible job, helping me understand this story, and connecting me with people that are important to it. I don't even know how to thank y'all. Like, I really don't. I was trying to figure it out.

Like, when I was talking to Melissa earlier, it feels like anything that I could come up with doesn't seem like quantifiable to how I feel inside. Like, I don't even have the words yet, I guess. I feel the same. Like I said, it's not over. It also doesn't feel like it's done yet. I have a very deep sense of this is not,

I'm sure there's going to be so much that's going to happen in the next few months. Right. But like, I feel like I gain friendship in you. You've been very candid and kind and we laugh a lot. Obviously, the listeners aren't going to hear us laughing all the time because most of that is done off the record. Before each session, we talk for, like, I don't know, probably like an hour before we even

start and usually. And this is what my fifth session, fourth or fifth, it's so nice to be able to talk to you. And I feel like you're giving me a gift to really. lease it and to kind of like let this stuff go. And I've told Jake before, I forgive him for all the things that he did to me. Like I can't hold on to that. I don't want to hold on to it. It's a little harder to forgive him for the stuff that he's done to Emerson. But like the stuff with me, like, it's been a long time and I've dealt with it a lot and talked about it a lot. Sometimes it feels like, I was like, that's a whole other person that that happened to. It wasn't me. It's so nice

to be able to put it out there and to have you do it because I know that you know that I listen to the show and that I've listened to every episode. I'd always tell Melissa all the time, like, we need to go on the show. We need to write her and tell her. It is just one of those things where I'm so glad it's you. Yeah, I'm so glad it's you. Thank you. Me too. I'm so honored. Like, I'm fucking crying again. Oh, I'm so glad it's me. I feel like all the stars have aligned and everything has just like,

I mean, this entire movement that y'all have began just by simply loving one another and supporting one another has led to all of this. Like, that is so fucking magical. Yeah. I was talking to Kaelin the other day and we were laughing and that so much has happened.

And this, just in 2022, We were joking. Like, can you believe? Like a year ago, if we would have told each other, this is where we would be, we would have just laughed hysterically. There's just no way. It's been so much that has happened. I feel really honored to be included in this group of women.

I think that's really changed the narrative for me. Rather than being ashamed, I think there will always be a little bit of shame involved in all of it. But rather than be ashamed of my part in all of this situation now, I more feel honored to be included with these other women, Kaelin and Sarah and Mimi, and also the women that we met through the Instagram. I've been so impacted by their stories and how brave they all are

and even watching some of the other women that shared their stories and then became friends with some of the other victims that shared their stories also. And they've created these friendships like what Kailin and I have, where they've helped each other through it and helped each other process it and answered questions for each other and really just become friends.

And it's so inspiring to me. I'm so thankful to be a part of it. I'm thankful that Sarah and Mimi were brave enough to create that Instagram in the first place and to start it off the way that they did and then to invite Kalin and I to share our stories and to help move it forward the way that it did. I don't think that any of us had any idea that it would take off the way that it did or that it would become what it became. It makes me sad that there are so many victims, but also thankful that they have a place to come, to talk, that they have a platform to share on. That was really important.

That was really inspiring through all of it. My hope with being on the podcast is the same hope that I had in sharing my story on the Instagram. trying to do my little part and hopefully stopping Jake's cycle of abuse in the future. That's such an isolating place to live. It's so incredibly isolating and confusing and shameful. I just hope that it resonates with someone, that it helps answer someone's questions. I wish that I would have had a platform like this back then. Thank you so much.

I don't even know how to like thank you properly. For everything that you've given and everything that you've shared and all of your bravery and time, everybody who has contributed this season has given so much towards this effort. It is so incredibly moving to me. And I just cannot thank you enough for trusting me. I feel very deeply connected to all of you. I now feel like I get to be a part of the community that you guys have. created. And it's such a beautiful place. And I feel honored to be witness to this experience.

Well, thank you. I can speak for everyone when I say that giving us a platform to share our stories when you've been shut down so often and told you're lying or nobody believes you to finally have a platform to share your story and to take your power back, not just for me, but for all of the other women that are sharing in this season, I can't thank you enough for your support and your friendship and helping us through this process. Even things that aren't necessarily included on the podcast, I'm so thankful to you, and I'm so thankful that you came into our lives. And I completely agree with the friendship aspect of it. You are definitely a part of our group at this point. And everybody just talks so highly of you and what you've added to their experiences and how easy you've made it on all of them to share their stories and how easy you are to talk to and share with.

It's made this whole process so much easier that I just can't thank you enough for everything that you've done for all of us. I'm crying again. Fuck. It's just such an honor in like this whole experience. I like, I'm getting sentimental rap. up. I was curious what it's been like for you so far with the podcast coming out and your beautiful artwork. I think it's been awesome. Reality really set in when people started sharing the artwork, like just realizing the scale of it. I've also conveniently stayed overwhelmed and busy,

so I maybe didn't have to like process the fact that we were doing this on what scale we were doing this. I didn't start coming to reality with it until the artwork dropped really and then the trailer dropped and then hearing it all together and hearing the feedback. It feels awesome to be validated and supported in this way, too, like, unified with so many awesome people. I feel like this was such a big thing for all of us on our healing journey. It's less about Jake at the end of the day and more about what we're doing to be heard, to be validated in this kind of way.

And that was kind of the point of showing our faces and doing things so different this time around with you, like taking our narrative back. The humanizing of each of the victims and, in turn the listeners who maybe are relating to some of these experiences, which unfortunately is a high number from what I've read, I don't wish this experience on anybody. I hope that they don't have to understand where we're coming from in these ways and that they get to just listen to this and be warned for anything that could come their way, but for the majority of

people who have unfortunately had an experience like this, it's great to see how validating it is for them. And I hope that it only has positive effects in their life and decisions moving forward in their own relationships and healing process. It's such a wild ride. I really think it's so incredible what has all transpired. When you started that Instagram page, could you ever have imagined that it would have led to all of this? Not at all. I hope at best it would help one other person. If it had helped one person, I would have been happy with that. Or when women started coming forward, if it ended there and gave them some sort of solidarity and made them feel like they weren't the crazy ones in of this, that would have been enough for me, but to see, like, it gained this kind of traction,

I'm just so grateful. Me too, and I'm so thankful to you for everything that you've done and all of the energy and time you've given to me for being so vulnerable and sharing so much. Jake, he targeted incredibly wonderful, empathetic, badass women who are coming together now. It's such a beautiful thing. Aw, I love you. I love you, too. I'm incredibly sorry for what you experienced and what you've been through.

I admire so much your bravery in setting this all on fire. You sparked this flame that has grown into this massive thing. You started this to help one person and you're going to end up helping millions of people. Thank you so much. That means so much for me. Something I was thinking like while you're saying that he targeted all these empathetic and beautiful, strong, whatever, it's honestly that sentiment has allowed me to reframe. I feel like empathy has been the weakness of mine.

There's so many things that we all have in common other than this trauma, but that made us right for the picking. Like he targeted us specifically. It seems like that level of empathy or empathy without boundaries is harmful to yourself. But this whole experience has allowed me to really reframe that and allow it to see like that's my superpower. That's like all of our superpower. The fact that we're able to empathize with maybe someone who doesn't deserve it,

but also like each other and show the strength in that. that was a game changer right there. Yeah. What I have come to learn is that being soft is hard as fuck. Because being vulnerable is hard as fuck. Like you have to have so much confidence in that. Like people try to minimize you and make you feel like you're fucking weak. No, actually, I'm fucking strong.

Hell yeah. Being soft is hardcore. That's my new quote. I'm going to letter that and we're all going to have to get that text to you too. Being soft is hardcore. I love that. It takes so much courage and bravery to put it all out there. Thank you so much.

I love you. I am incredibly honored to have been trusted by the survivors this season to share their stories. And I'm grateful beyond words to each of them for participating and for their bravery and energy and vulnerability. Kaelin, Carly, Julie, Melissa, Mimi, Sarah, Maria. Kit, Clementine, Carrie, and Violet. Thank you so, so much. I'd also like to thank all of our allies to these survivors that spoke with me this season both on and off the record,

and my teammates are incredibly talented audio designer Becca and our social media and community manager, Lily. Thank you, friends, for listening, supporting, and sharing this season. Next week, the audio from our live Q&A event will be in your feed, and the following week, Becca, Lily, and I were taking a week off. Then we'll be back with season 15, beginning the season with Holly Madison, as she shares her experience of abuse while living at the Playboy Mansion during her seven-year relationship with Hugh Hefner.

Thank you again so, so much for listening and supporting the survivors and the podcast this season. Please, please, please, sign the petition and share it on social media if you can. It's on our website and it's in the episode notes. Something Was Wrong.com. Wishing you all a wonderful holiday season with your loved ones. If you're having a difficult time this holiday season, please know that you're loved. And there are resources available to support you. Visit somethingwaswrong.com slash resources for a list of nonprofit organizations that can help.

Thank you so much. Happy holidays and stay safe, friends. Something Was Wrong is a broken cycle media production, created and hosted by me, Tiffany Reese. If you'd like to support the show further, you can share episodes with your loved ones, leave a positive review, or follow Something Was Wrong on Instagram, at Something Was Wrong podcast. Our theme song was composed by Gladrags. Check out their album, Wonder Under. Thank you so much.