Something Was Wrong - S25 Ep22: Answering Community Questions with Dr. Nicole Bedera, Dr. Kathryn Holland & Dr. Jacqueline Cruz Part 2
Episode Date: May 7, 2026*Content Warning: institutional betrayal, institutional trauma, sexual assault, sexual abuse, sexual harassment, campus violence, gender-based violence, psychological trauma, victim-blaming, discrimi...nation, gender inequality, harassment, and hostile campus environments. Free + Confidential Resources + Safety Tips: somethingwaswrong.com/resources Follow Dr. Nicole Bedera: Website: https://www.nicolebedera.com/ Blue Sky: https://bsky.app/profile/nbedera.bsky.social Book: On The Wrong Side - How Universities Protect Perpetrators and Betray Survivors of Sexual Violence: https://www.nicolebedera.com/about-1 Beyond Compliance Consulting: https://www.beyond-compliance-consulting.com/ Survivor Alumni Network: https://survivoralumninetwork.org/ Follow Dr. Jacqueline Cruz: Dr. Jacqueline Cruz on Google Scholars: https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=oHhHaTEAAAAJ&hl=en Beyond Compliance Consulting: https://www.beyond-compliance-consulting.com/ Survivor Alumni Network: https://survivoralumninetwork.org/ Follow Dr. Kathryn Holland: Website: https://psychology.unl.edu/person/kathryn-holland/ Dr. Kathryn Holland on Google Scholars: https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=OgJhWwoAAAAJ&hl=en SWW S25 Theme Song & Artwork: The S25 cover art is by the Amazing Sara Stewart instagram.com/okaynotgreat/ The S25 theme song is a cover of Glad Rag’s U Think U from their album Wonder Under, performed by the incredible Abayomi instagram.com/Abayomithesinger. The S25 theme song cover was produced by Janice “JP” Pacheco instagram.com/jtooswavy/ *Sources: -Bedera, Nicole et al. “"I Could Never Tell My Parents": Barriers to Queer Women's College Sexual Assault Disclosure to Family Members.” Violence against women vol. 29,5 (2023): 800-816. doi:10.1177/10778012221101920 https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35938472/-Bedera, Nicole. (2021). Moaning and Eye Contact: Men’s Use of Ambiguous Signals in Attributions of Consent to Their Partners. Violence Against Women. 27. 3093-3113. 10.1177/1077801221992870 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/349905933_Moaning_and_Eye_Contact_Men's_Use_of_Ambiguous_Signals_in_Attributions_of_Consent_to_Their_Partners-Bedera, Nicole Krystine. On the Wrong Side: How Universities Protect Perpetrators and Betray Survivors of Sexual Violence. University of California Press, 2024. https://www.nicolebedera.com/about-1-Bedera, Nicole. (2022). The Illusion of Choice: Organizational Dependency and the Neutralization of University Sexual Assault Complaints. Law & Policy. 44. 10.1111/lapo.12194. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/362058763_The_Illusion_of_Choice_Organizational_Dependency_and_the_Neutralization_of_University_Sexual_Assault_Complaints-Cipriano, A. E., Holland, K. J., Bedera, N., Eagan, S. R., & Diede, A. S. (2022). Severe and pervasive? Consequences of sexual harassment for graduate students and their Title IX report outcomes. Feminist Criminology, 17(3), 343–367. https://doi.org/10.1177/15570851211062579-Cruz, Jacqueline. (2021). The Constraints of Fear and Neutrality in Title IX Administrators’ Responses to Sexual Violence. The Journal of Higher Education, 92(3), 363–384. https://doi.org/10.1080/00221546.2020.1809268-Cruz, Jacqueline. “Gender Inequality in Higher Education: University Title IX Administrators’ Responses to Sexual Violence.” Google, New York University, 2020, scholar.google.com/citations?view_op=view_citation&hl=en&user=oHhHaTEAAAAJ&citation_for_view=oHhHaTEAAAAJ%3Ad1gkVwhDpl0C-Holland, K. J., & Cortina, L. M. (2013). When sex-based harassment becomes sexual harassment: College students’ experiences. Journal of Applied Psychology, 98(2), 313–328. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0032040-Holland, K. J., & Cortina, L. M. (2016). Sexual harassment: Undermining the well-being of working women. Journal of Social Issues, 72(4), 825–842. https://doi.org/10.1111/josi.12190-Holland, K. J., Rabelo, V. C., & Cortina, L. M. (2014). Sex-based harassment and discrimination: Evidence of psychological harm. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 38(3), 368–382. https://doi.org/10.1177/0361684314521575- Holland, K. J. (2019). Culture, power, and gender-based violence in institutions. In C. B. Travis & J. W. White (Eds.), APA Handbook of the Psychology of Women (Vol. 2, pp. 253–271). American Psychological Association. https://doi.org/10.1037/0000059-014- Holland, Kathryn J, and Rebecca L Howard Valdivia. “Title IX and Sexual Violence in Higher Education: A Mapping Review and Assessment of Policy Implementation and Effectiveness.” Journal of sex research, 1-19. 18 Feb. 2026, doi:10.1080/00224499.2026.2623649. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/41705546/
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This season discusses sexual, physical, and psychological violence.
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Thank you so much for listening.
You think you know me, you don't know me well at all.
You don't know anybody till you talk to someone.
A listener asked, if I didn't understand.
understand it was wrong at the time, does that mean it was an abuse? How would you respond?
This is Catherine. I can jump in. And I want to say that this is something that is unbelievably
common. The way that you look at or think about an experience that you had, if it differs now
from when it was before, that doesn't mean that it wasn't abuse. That doesn't mean that it wasn't
trauma. There are a lot of ways in which our sociocultural structures, norms, institutions
actively work to try to convince people that experiences of harassment and violence are not actually
bad, are not harassment and violence. One of the primary things that I hear when people talk about
either why they didn't want to report or why they were at first hesitant to tell people about their
experience is that they weren't sure that it was bad enough. They weren't sure it was severe enough
that there's worse things that could have happened or other people have had it worse.
Our social structures and institutions for so long have actively created the conditions
in which people don't understand that abuse is abuse. You are not alone if that was yours.
experience and it doesn't change what that experience was and its impact on you. We are dynamic
human beings. How we see and experience things changes over time, a lot of time with space,
gaining more knowledge and information. I would say with complete certainty that if you didn't
understand it was wrong at the time, that doesn't mean that it wasn't abuse and that this is something
that is extremely common and that is because of our social institutions and structures.
This is Nicole. One of the things that sociologists know has to happen for someone to come forward about their rights being violated is something called the naming, blaming, and claiming process.
Where you have to be able to name what happened to you. You have to blame the correct person. And you have to be able to file the right type of legal claim. And in sexual violence, for all the reasons that Catherine is talking about, this is a really steep bar. This is a really difficult hurdle for survivors to get over because our institutions give us misinformation.
about what sexual violence is.
Our culture gives us misinformation
about what sexual violence is.
And so when it happens to people,
they have a hard time with that naming process.
And then the blaming process too,
one of the reasons that it's difficult
for survivors to call what happened to them abuse
is because they've been taught to blame themselves.
They'll say what happened was violent,
it was traumatic, it hurt me,
but I don't know if my perpetrator,
if it was all his fault,
because I did this, I did that.
And that's a big part of why rape myths are so damaging. That's a big part of why they're so prolific. They interrupt the naming, glaming, and claiming process. And what researchers find is that if you can't name and you can't blame, then it's impossible to be able to write a claim that will be taken with any kind of seriousness. Because if you can't name what happened to you and blame the right party, how would you even go about reporting what happened to you? You wouldn't be able to do the most basic steps. This is just to say, again, to echo what you
Catherine saying this is a really big problem. It's really common and the repercussions in our society
are really broad. And I also just want to say that it is not survivors fault. When they can't name,
blame and claim appropriately, our entire social system is meant to make that process really hard.
And it's common for it to be difficult. And that doesn't mean anything about the violence that
transpired, except that it unfortunately took longer for a survivor to be able to get help.
This Jackie here. I agree with everything that Katie and Nicole said. And the one thing that I want to
add, I think we need to interrogate the idea that people didn't understand it was wrong at the time
for all the reasons that Katie and Nicole are mapping out. There is a whole culture that is
constantly telling women that the abuse that we experience in life is not worthy of being seen
as abuse and no one's going to believe us. We should just deal with it. For that reason,
I think a lot of people, myself included in my own life, have had experiences that happen to them
where your feelings are like, I'm not exactly sure what this is, but I want to interrogate this
idea of not understanding it was wrong at the time because I think so often there is something
about these incidences that people feel in their bodies that was not right. And this is why it
sticks with people so long that there does come a time where there is a recognition that it was
abuse. There is some knowledge that we all have that something was wrong. And I wish that
our society would catch up to empowering everyone to tap into those feelings more in being able to
follow those feelings through to being able to say that what happened was abuse. Jackie, I think you're
right. This is Nicole, because I think there is a reason that the language that comes up is people saying,
I didn't think it was that bad, which is this recognition that something fell off, but was it bad
enough that it should merit other people to do things on my behalf, to support me, to hold my
perpetrator accountable. There's this sense of if my life is not completely destroyed, if I was
able to resist at all, why couldn't I have done more? Why can't I have done more? Why can't I handle it on my
own? Which comes from this idea that as women, we are supposed to provide social support to everyone
else, but that we are supposed to act as individuals and need nothing. And that's really the gender
dynamic that's underlying so much of this. And even when the victim is not a woman, because it is a
crime that is so feminized. Other people will feel that too is something that I've heard from some
male victims that I've interviewed as well. And so, Jackie, I think you're right. And the other thing that
I just really want to reiterate is that we're all saying it, but this is really common. And a lot of
the time, especially for survivors who are still in a violent context, it's not really safe to grapple
with how violent things are. If you don't have the support you need to make sense of that violence,
And this is the reason why a lot of people, they don't really reckon with the violence in, for example, an abusive relationship until they leave that relationship. And that's when they can really start to think things through in a different way because you can't be vulnerable like that around someone who poses a danger to your health and safety. It's just not safe. In the book, I talk about how so many of the survivors that I interviewed did not blame their university for what happened to them. They blame themselves. They have this perception that Title IX works for everyone but me.
And the reason it didn't work for me is because I didn't report the right way.
I didn't say the right thing.
I didn't label it fast enough.
They all had some reason that was keeping them up at night and that they were blaming themselves over.
I didn't get to know everything that a lot of the survivors thought until the book was published,
but many of them have reached out since reading the book.
And so many of them responded by saying, wow, I did not know that everybody else was struggling
with their grades.
I didn't know that other people lost their housing.
I didn't know that other people were failed by the Title IX.
I didn't realize that everything I was going through was the system as designed. And I am so angry. Some of that
came from reading the book and some of it came from just leaving the school for survivors that had
graduated or dropped out, whichever of those outcomes. As soon as they were away, it was sort of like
leaving an abusive relationship where they started to say, that was messed up. And a part of why
they could realize it was messed up was they could be more vulnerable. They were somewhere that was
safer. But also they weren't surrounded by people who were justifying the
institution's behavior anymore. I talk about this in one of the final chapters of the book with
the example of Kiara, where she was the one survivor who was adamant the entire time that her
school had betrayed her and it wasn't her fault. But she would go try to tell people on campus and express
her concerns about Title IX and her professors would defend Title IX. There would be staff saying
they're just doing the best they can. There'd be people trying to justify why what happened to her was
okay or why it wouldn't happen to them, which is where a lot of victim blaming comes from.
is you tell somebody your story
and they respond back with saying,
well, isn't it your fault?
I don't want to believe that we live in a patriarchal society
where things this bad just happen on a regular basis
and that there's nothing we can do to guarantee
it will never happen to us.
And so once they were removed from that specific university,
nobody felt a need to defend the university anymore.
And the way that they would try to get that distance
would be things like saying, wow, your school is really bad.
I'm so lucky my school wasn't like that.
We know as researchers, all of these schools are,
just about equally bad to each other,
with very little variation much less than we would have expected.
But the main thing I want to communicate here
is that the reason survivors struggle to name what happened to them,
to label it as abuse,
and to be able to really reckon with it,
the reason that that can come later,
it has as much to do with the context you're living in
as your personal individual feelings about the violence at the time.
And in a different context,
it's not surprising that somebody would later in life
when they are in a different scenario, say, actually, that was really messed up. And that really hurt me.
And I think it was abusive. Absolutely. And I can't help but think of a survivor who will hear from this
season who were calling Allegra in your book, Dr. Badera, you referred to her as Marissa. And because
we already had a Marissa this season, we went with a different pseudonym. Something that was so
heartbreaking for me to hear from her was that she really thought highly of the university and her
experience for the most part until she read how the university viewed her in the book.
I think it brought her a lot of clarity and healing, but it's just absolutely heartbreaking.
The other thing I wanted to say is I was thinking of Survivor Marissa from Chapter 3 this
season. She shared that when she went to Title IX, one of the things that the Title IX coordinator
there said to her was, well, thankfully it wasn't more violent. And so I think it goes back to those
attitudes we were talking about where below the surface is so much patriarchy and inequality that
has seeped into our daily ideas and beliefs that it shows up in so many insidious ways that
I think even sometimes women have trouble recognizing it. And I appreciate the way that all of your
work highlights that and I hope that it will eventually help bring more people along on that
journey. And one of the things I really love that you said, Dr. Baderra was about expanding the range
of safe people.
Something I always recommend to folks who reach out to me and they're like, I hear these
stories or I read the news and I'm so pissed.
What can I do?
I strongly recommend just getting involved or volunteering somewhere and being in service
to other people or doing what you can to support survivors.
There are always nonprofit organizations who are desperately looking for volunteers.
Survivors mentioned throughout this season and behind the scenes that,
sometimes there were witnesses to concerning behavior or even assaults, but that other students
didn't intervene. Why do you think that's so common? This is Catherine. There are a number of
different ways that bystanders can intervene, whether that is directly with the person who is
engaging in the behavior or whether that is intervening with the victim. There's different
interventions that someone can do in a situation which they've witnessed something. Bystander
intervention training is really common on college campuses, and a lot of times it's viewed as it's going
to fix all of the problems and that the only thing we need to do to address sexual violence is to have
bystanders intervene. My qualms about that is while on the one hand having a bystander or a
witness step in and intervene can make a really big difference in one individual case, that doesn't
mean that it is actually primary prevention because there is harassment or assault already
happening that then was interrupted. I think that institutions would do.
better to actually put more of their work into primary prevention efforts because there isn't
that same way of sort of calling out the perpetration problem on this campus is sort of like,
we're all in this together, which is a better message than I think primary prevention at times.
But in theory, bystander intervention can be something that is really helpful.
There are a number of barriers that can hinder bystanders from actually intervening.
It's an area of research where there is a growing amount of empirical evidence as to what are some of the different reasons why people do not intervene when they witness something happening.
Some of it depends on the sort of specific context.
So, for example, some researchers are looking at what are some specific barriers that come up when people are drinking, for instance.
But there is this sort of normalization of sexual violence and sexual harassment in general that we've already been talking about, the things that basically tell survival.
that what they experienced actually wasn't that bad.
There is some concern about making things awkward.
What if I get it wrong?
There's also some potential concern about safety concerns,
whether that safety concern for the victim in that situation,
could I make things worse,
or safety for themselves of what would it mean for me
if I came forward and said something?
This often will manifest within a culture of mandatory reporting
where there is sometimes individuals
who are designated as mandatory reporters on campus
who are supposed to be reporting incidents that they see or hear about,
they will also express concern about that if I report this,
I will also experience retaliation.
And on paper, there might be a policy that protects whistleblowers
or at least minimally a statement within a sexual misconduct policy
that says retaliation is against this policy.
But as you've already talked about earlier in this season,
institutions do not do a great job of actually addressing retaliation when it happens.
And so I think it's a combination of things, including the sort of social systems and pressures
and structures that makes people doubt what they're seeing is a problem. In some cases, it might be
that they're just not sure about the tools available to them to be able to intervene safely.
And so it's really common for people to experience barriers to stepping forward. In some cases,
it could really make a big difference for someone. But the same kind of pressures that act on
survivors also can make it difficult for people who witness it to come forward and say something
as well. And even if they do come forward and say something, those reports are often disregarded
too. This is Nicole. Catherine, that was excellent. That was exactly right. You covered so much of what I
think needed to be said. And I want to jump on this to just tell a little story about how difficult it can
be to be the namer. We just talked about naming, blaming, and claiming for someone to be a bystander
intervene, they also have to participate in some amount of that naming, blaming, and claiming
process. And we really have this assumption in our society that no one can ever really know
what happened in a case of sexual violence, even if you witnessed it. So to give you an example of this,
before I did work for On the Wrong Side, I used to do research on victims, and I used to do research
on men, many of whom were perpetrators. And the first study was with men. I was interviewing them
about the techniques they use to seek consent
and how they go about seeking consent
when they're having sex.
And some of the stories that I heard from them
were very clearly rapes,
where they were disregarding their partner's consent,
they were doing things that their partner
was giving them clear indication
that they did not want to do.
And when I tried to publish that research finding,
I could not because peer reviewers,
many of whom are professors on college campuses
who have witnessed violence and harassment
and who likely have not intervened,
peer reviewers would say,
well, you don't know what was in the victim's mind.
she might have been fine with it.
She might not consider herself a victim at all.
So to be able to call a man a perpetrator,
even if he confesses, that's not enough.
You have to know what she thinks.
So I thought, okay, I'm going to do research on survivors.
I was planning it anyway.
And so then I had stories of sexual assault survivors
naming what happened to them as assault, saying it was traumatic for them.
And then I got the same critique from peer reviewers,
but switched a little where they said,
well, you don't know what was in the mind of the perpetrator.
You don't know if he meant to hurt her or if it was just a misunderstanding or a mistake.
Unless you hear from the perpetrator, you can't label this rape.
As a researcher, you can see how then the next book I produced, I interviewed victims and perpetrators
and the people in power in their cases at the same time because there's this idea that if you
don't have perfect knowledge, that if the victim and perpetrator don't agree that sexual
violence took place, that that everybody else should hesitate to do anything.
when I was interviewing administrators for on the wrong side,
a lot of what they would say,
there would be all of this evidence that to me felt undeniable.
It felt like plenty of evidence,
not only for the school to be able to intervene,
but that they would be required by law to intervene.
But you would hear administrators say things like,
well, but can we ever really know what happened?
And they would say over and over again,
none of us can ever be completely certain about what took place.
So that general ideology around sexual violence,
that it's all in the eye of the beholder.
And I think when it comes to bystander intervention,
it ends up getting really sticky, really quickly,
because you start seeing these arguments over who is the true victim.
As a woman, I'm on a college campus,
I see something that makes me feel unsafe.
I would be upset.
There is this real presumption that that's not enough
for me to be able to say something,
for me to be able to intervene,
because isn't there someone, you know,
the original victim, if she's okay with it,
then you have to be okay with it.
And it's one of the things that I've been trying to break down a little bit,
And to say, this is one of the things I ended the book in, around not endorsing mandatory reporting,
not saying that we should all be doing this without any concern about the survivor's consent,
but to say that if there are situations that violate community norms and all of the evidence is right in public,
a bunch of people saw it, there's no reason to put the burden on the survivor to be the one who has to go through this whole investigation process.
One of the cases I think about a lot from the book was a case involving a victim.
people on their dorm room floor had broken into their room,
stolen a bunch of their possessions,
and written gendered slurs on the whiteboard
on the outside of their dorm room.
All of the residence assistants,
all of the housing staff,
those people are technically mandatory reporters,
and on paper they should have intervened,
but they didn't because there was this real sense
that unless someone comes to me
and the victim is the one who says that this happened to them,
then everybody else should look the other way.
And I think that's something we really have to push back on,
on this idea that if you saw it happen and it violates the community standards,
if it violates the principles of a gender equitable and safe environment,
that's something that affects every single person in that community.
There should just be some behaviors that the school doesn't tolerate no matter what.
That being said, part of what makes it so pernicious that we're looking to survivors to do
the naming, blaming, and claiming process for all of us.
And we put that burden on them is that there's still not a respect for their autonomy.
So we have these scenarios like where a survivor just says I'm a survivor and now is being forced into a Title IX process against their will essentially as a form of punishment and is a way of policing survivors free speech on campus and saying, well, you don't have the right to say that.
Now we as the institution get to adjudicate whether or not we think you should be allowed to call yourself a survivor, especially if you already know two or three people in advance who will agree with you and who can have your back, you should intervene.
every time you see something, every time that you're concerned,
and in a way that prioritizes the survivor's autonomy and care for them.
There have been research studies that have been done
that basically finds that college men underestimate the other men around them.
They're like, I see this as a problem,
but I think that the other men around me do not see it as a problem.
So there's this concern of like, I see it as an issue,
but I don't think everyone else does.
I just wanted to say what Nicole was saying is that if you feel like something is wrong,
other people feel like something is wrong too, and it is okay to say something because there's evidence
that people underestimate how uncomfortable and outraged other people are. Yes, Jackie here. One thing that I
wanted to really focus on is that so much of the public's approach to how sexual violence should be
addressed is individualized. Oftentimes, the public individualizes a sexually violent act and
sees it as this one thing that happened on this one campus and there's an individual solution,
oh, if only this bystander had intervened. What we know about sexual violence on college campuses
is that this is really a structural issue, that this is happening over and over because of many
factors, but a lot of how our culture is structured, always having sympathy and empathy for
male perpetrators, thinking about the role of women, how universities are structurally
made up. There's policies and practices that make them
environments where sexual assault is more likely to happen.
You know, when we're thinking about how easy people jump to bystander
intervention, for me, as well as them, it's like thinking about these other things we can do
to make communities safer. How do we change a campus community into one that is not
okay with sexual violence happening, but is a campus community that is really saying, hey, we're going
hold people accountable for their violent acts? Or how do we change policies that could help create a
community where violence is less likely to occur? Thinking about it more from this structural perspective
than from this more individual act, which is how it's so often as approached. This is Nicole. And I also
think that the underlying logic of the institution that makes it hard for people to intervene is that
the biggest risk is in underreacting. In something happens, the other person says,
oh, it didn't really bother me that much,
but that would be an okay outcome in comparison
to the violence escalating,
that person being hurt and nobody having said or done anything,
an entire room full of people seeing,
this is a way that it's okay
for people to be treated and violence is tolerated here.
But I think the institution sees the biggest risk as overreacting
and of people defaming a perpetrator
or hurting his reputation, making him look bad or feel bad.
That's part of the problem,
is that this institutional logic that Jackie's,
talking about is very much at the odds of the logic of bystander intervention, which, if anything,
if we have to make a mistake in one direction, we want to be intervening and checking on things
too much, not not enough.
A topic that came up frequently in our conversations with survivors this season was the
confusion they felt surrounding informal versus formal resolutions.
What does the research show about that?
Is that confusion common?
This is Nicole, and yes.
That confusion is very common, in part because it wasn't that long ago that informal resolution
was not permitted on college campuses for cases involving sexual violence.
Under the Obama-era guidance, there was a prohibition on using informal resolution because
schools were abusing informal resolution.
Students would come to them and say, I was sexually assaulted, please do something to
protect me.
And the school would say back, your informal resolution is this conversation.
You told us, thanks for letting us know.
now you don't get any kind of oversight, you don't get any say over what happens next,
and we're going to give you a list of things that you can do differently to not get sexually assaulted again,
which is victim-blaming. And then there were other informal resolutions that put victims in a lot of risk and a lot of danger.
So things like mediation can really exacerbate the power dynamics between victim and perpetrator
and allow violence to escalate, especially in cases of things like intimate partner violence that can have a high risk of lethality.
It's very dangerous. And so there's a period of time on college campuses,
where as far as I can tell, they never really fully stopped handling issues informally,
but they stopped telling students what it was.
And they would treat it more like a way that they could convince students to stop the investigation process.
And there was no formal definition of what they were doing instead or why they were doing it or what students' rights were
because they were violating the regulation to do it.
Now, under the Trump administration with their 2020 rule, there is now explicit permissible.
mission and a requirement that schools offer informal resolution. I was at Western University
in 2018 to 2019. This was before that regulation took effect, but they'd already been doing
informal resolution for years. And part of why it was surprising the survivors was because they'd
been doing it under the table. And so it would have been impossible for a survivor to know what they
were walking into when it wasn't defined. But even now, there aren't very clear definitions of what
an informal resolution is or when it's over. For an investigation, it's laid out that there are
expectations of things like documentation and giving updates to the end of a case. For informal
resolution, there are none of those requirements. And so there isn't a lot of research into
informal resolution so far because a lot of survivors don't even know that they did it. And so it's a
really difficult thing for researchers to capture. In my research, I found that most informal
resolutions amounted to essentially nothing, especially if they used this expansive idea of what's
not allowed in informal resolution, which is not allowed to be pure.
unitive. Things like an agreement where the perpetrator and the victim agree that they will not
go into the same academic building during the same hours. The school I studied didn't even allow
that for informal resolution. So the only things that they allowed at that university were educational
measures, which sounds better than it is. The educational measures they offered were essentially
someone from the title night in office sitting down with the perpetrator and reading them the sexual
misconduct policy and saying any questions. I found out my interviews with perpetrators that they
actually found these educational measures incredibly useful for being able to perpetrate better in the
future. Because now they knew exactly the line to look for. They got more information about what the
university would and would not do, would and would not consider to be violence. But most of the time,
survivors that I interviewed were just told that everything they wanted was ineligible for
informal resolution. And their cases were closed without their knowledge. What I would say now for
any survivors who are considering an informal process is that you don't know what you're getting into.
And that's one of the risks that the university is requiring you to accept.
This Jackie, I think that the idea of having an informal process is gendered discrimination.
Because think about any other infraction that you would go and report, your wallet got stolen.
Somebody punched you in the face. And then for them to sit down and say, you thought that it was
important enough to come and report. And now we're going to put you in the position of saying,
well, actually, you could report it informally or you could report it formally. I think for most people
when they go to report, the steps to report in the first place is taking steps towards doing something
formal. Why I call it gender discrimination is I think when it comes up in the case of sexual
violence, because it doesn't come up in these other cases, there is just too much cultural
baggage about what being a good victim or what being a good girl looks like in our society. And it is
usually not standing up and saying sexual violence is bad. It is usually saying, I will go along with the
system. I will not necessarily advocate for the best thing for me. That's our cultural framework.
So you're taking somebody in a vulnerable moment and you're saying, hey, actually, you could do this
thing that might be a little bit easier. That actually rarely benefits the survivor.
but benefits the university to brush it away.
To me, it's absurd that it even exists.
I think it's so gendered and I think it is so discriminatory
because it is kind of what our culture,
guilt, survivors to do in general.
To me, it's very messy and it makes me angry.
This is Catherine.
In my perspective,
the way that inform a resolution in the case of sexual harassment and assault
under Title IX has become,
another mode of perpetrating institutionalized gender discrimination.
The combination of the lack of clarity and transparency around what informal resolution is,
the less structure of what this is supposed to look like that Nicole mentioned,
but also the active twisting of informal resolution in very deliberate ways to benefit perpetrators
under the Trump administration's 2020 regulations, things like educational programs,
for perpetrators, which we know is just really not that useful whatsoever. It's just a way for the
school to say that they've done something. Some schools like to claim that they're doing restorative justice
processes when how well they're doing those is still questionable. There's just not a lot of evidence
as to what those look like. There are alternative resolution processes that actually have some
kind of form and structure. And then there's also supportive measures. Supportive measures,
corrective actions. These are different terms that Title IX guidance has used to talk about the other
kinds of supports and actions that can help to remedy the effects of sexual violence and restore
a survivor's access to educational activities, programs, benefits, etc. If you think about how sexual
violence is at the heart of Title IX is the fact that this act is a form of gender discrimination
and it has limiting this person's access to education, that simply removing a perpetrator,
for example, might not be enough to actually address that problem and restore that survivor's equal
access to education. What happened under the 2020 Trump administration,
which was different from prior Title IX guidance,
was the alternative resolution processes cannot be punitive,
which means that if a survivor wants their perpetrator
to potentially be suspended or expelled, removed for the institution,
or terminated if they're an employee,
that that automatically takes alternative resolution process,
like a mediation or short of justice, whatever, off the table.
Additionally, the 2020 regulations required that supportive measures
be offered to both survivors and the person who was named as their perpetrator as well.
which is just underscoring this idea that essentially being accused of sexual violence is enough
to undermine your access to education because the whole purpose of supportive measures and corrective
actions was to correct the harm that violence occurred. Research has found Title IX policies.
They are much less likely to include any kind of details about informal resolution.
And part of that is because the 2020 regulations were so detailed in prescriptive in the way that
they wanted those formal grievance processes to look. It's been a combination of different factors
that has come together to essentially make this a process that is seen as less risky for the
institution and they're more likely to funnel survivors toward it because they can control the
outcome much more and see it as less of a potential threat to the institution. So this is Nicole.
I have a few follow-up thoughts. The first I want to say is that Katie's right that in formal
resolution, it's become really fuzzy and fluffy on a lot of college campuses. And some schools are
now trying to insinuate that you have to go through an informal Title IX process to do things like
get academic accommodations in a specific class and that this has to go through the Title IX office.
So I just want to clarify that that was not the case before and that that was not the thing
that was banned by the Obama administration. That actually the Trump administration has been trying
to defang victim advocacy offices that were.
operating more independently and can give survivors things like supportive measures,
they would do things like negotiate, no contact directives, and all this kind of stuff that we're
talking about. They used to do that outside of the Title IX process. At many schools, they still
do to some degree, but fewer and fewer every year is what I'm finding. It was actually a massive
loss to take all of these processes outside of a victim-centered space and bring them into a space
where victims are suspect and everything is seen through the lens of what are the stakes for the
perpetrator. Is this quote-unquote fair to a perpetrator? One of the other risks about supportive
measures coming under the informal resolution umbrella is that if it's in a Title IX office,
now a Title IX investigation can be opened against your will at any time. Schools hesitate to do
that. They don't do it very often. But in comparison to going to a confidential victim advocate,
where they cannot open an investigation. They cannot share anything.
you have experienced outside of that room, it's just a much higher level of risk that survivors
have to entertain and accept to be able to do things like get help in their classes or get tuition
back for a class that they failed because they didn't get support in time. Schools like to make it
sounds like it's an either or that if you're opposed to informal resolution, then we're going to
take away all supports for survivors. And that is not the system any of us are advocating for. And it's
not the system that existed before. This is a new problem that they created on purpose. The other
thing I want to say is that one of the main reasons why survivors gravitate towards informal
resolution is because of all the comments that we're hearing where the investigation process
is so traumatic and so burdensome on survivors that they feel like informal resolution,
it has to be better. I don't know that I would say that either process will avoid institutional
betrayal as a guarantee. Most of them provide inaction no matter what process you went to go there
and survivors still feel very hurt and re-traumatized by what they experienced.
But we have to name that if the reason why survivors are choosing informal resolution,
even if they are well-informed, which again is very rare,
but if the reason they're choosing it is because the investigation process
would threaten their ability to complete their degree,
would threaten their health and safety,
would come with risks of retaliation and violence,
then this is not a freely made choice.
For informal resolution, even if we were to think of it in its best case scenario,
It can't reach that while the investigation process is so violent.
If everybody's picking it as their only option, that's not good.
That's not survivor-centered.
That's not trauma-informed.
And it doesn't allow for any agency.
Informal resolution is absolutely not that a survivor says, this is what I want,
and the school says we're going to do our best to provide it.
Quite the opposite.
A lot of the time the school says, tell us everything that you want to need.
Be very vulnerable.
Trust us.
And then they go through the list and cross all those items off one by one
and say, can't give you that, won't do that, won't do this, won't do that. And so it can be
really, really painful too. Part of why informal resolution is a form of discrimination and gender
discrimination is because it implies that the university's only concern about sexual violence is that it
upset the victim and that if they can find a way to pacify that one specific victim, then it is okay
to leave a violent perpetrator on campus. Even if there's a risk they will reoffend, even if we know
they're already harassing and assaulting other people,
even if they are discriminating against other students on campus.
One of the most common forms of sex discrimination on a college campus is from faculty.
And there are things like a professor standing at the front of the room and saying things like,
I think women make worse engineers than men.
Even if all of the women in that room would be okay with an informal process and would agree
that that's the way that they want to handle it.
I would still say that the institution has an obligation to fire a professor who has loudly proclaimed that he discriminates against women.
Because that's not a decision that only affects the women who are in the room that day.
The decision about what the university is going to do is going to shape things like how many women can get a degree in engineering,
what classes they feel like they can take without experiencing discrimination, their sense of worth, their sense of competency,
all of these other things that are so much bigger than that one individual,
you will comment. The reason sexual harassment is concerning is in part because it's upsetting for the
people who experience it, but also because it's an indicator into the gender ideology of the person
who did the harassing. Someone who's willing to say that in front of a class of students is almost
certainly engaging in other types of gender discrimination too, and the university shouldn't be
allowed to just wash their hands of that and say, well, some people thought we could handle
informally, so I guess we're good. I'm curious what advice you would give to someone who's interested in
becoming a researcher such as yourselves. This is Catherine. I love this question as someone who
loves research. One is if you are in higher education or you are about to be, look for opportunities
to get involved in research, working as research assistants and someone's lab, doing an honors thesis
or an undergraduate senior thesis, because if you want to become a researcher, the typical next step will be
to pursue a PhD program in an area.
PhD degrees are research degrees.
That is a large component of what you do in a PhD program.
Setting you up for success in a PhD program is going to be getting some foundational experiences
with what research is like early on.
I really recommend taking a look to see what is the research being done on your campus.
If you see faculty members or graduate students who are doing research that you find really
interesting, reach out to them, see if they have any work for undergraduate students.
You can also reach out to faculty and graduate students who are not at your institution.
I have had multiple students, for example, who have been involved in my research lab as research assistants
who did not go to my institution. And also, if you don't want to go to a PhD program, you can still
get involved in assisting people with research, reaching out to see if there's any opportunities to
volunteer in their lab, find some research that you find really interesting, contact that researcher
to either talk to them about their research or what it might look like to get involved.
This is Jackie. My only addition to that would be that anyone who wants to get accepted into a program, one of the things that you could do is to be able to really think strategically and smartly about how these issues tie into so many other important issues. So thinking about how does this topic fit into other forms of studies such as looking at inequality in education or looking at gender inequality and thinking about those bigger umbrella topics that this falls under.
and making sure to make a really good argument for why this is important within the field,
which is possible. I think when you take that approach, it's much harder for people to say no to you.
That is very true. Doing research in this area is not easy for a number of different reasons,
and a lot of it is institutions being able to basically like throw up obstacles and blockades to be
able to access the kinds of data that you might need to be able to answer these questions,
which is why researchers have often had to get creative in terms of how we actually study these topics.
I would say don't necessarily let that hold you back.
And if there's a question that you want to be studying and gathering information on,
to talk to other researchers who are doing that work in that area because they can also help
to talk about what are some ways that we could go about actually collecting the data,
even if it's a difficult one.
Jackie here, I just wanted to add one thing, following what Katie is saying,
also just being true to yourself and knowing what it is that you find important because I can tell
you that many people over the course of my research told me that I should not center gender as much
as I was. A lot of people had advice about this is a bureaucratic issue or other lenses and I was saying
no actually the gender inequality aspect of my work is something that I truly, truly believe in.
I really had to have self-confidence in that I knew what I was talking about and to stay the course.
Once people saw my research, that wasn't what they were saying to me anymore.
They were very encouraging and supportive of my research, but getting to that point and getting
people to believe in centering gender, it took some work.
So much of the Academy is telling us that we shouldn't tap into our lived experience.
And I think that that is so crazy and such bad advice because I think it is our lived
experiences. For me, I know it's my experience of being a woman in this world that made me able to
stick to my own research and to probe a problem that people sometimes were saying wasn't a worthy
problem to look at. We live in this era where it's the do your own research and people call themselves
journalists just because they have a big TikTok following or whatever it would be. That's not the same as
being a researcher. Research is a really specific set of methodologies, values. There are lots of things that
when you come at this work from a researcher lens, surprise you. I think people when they hear us talk
will think that we've known this stuff the whole time. We had this feeling in our gut of what we would
find in our research, but all three of us have been surprised by things that we have found. And most
commonly, the way that I've been surprised is that things have been worse than I expected,
that we sort of sugarcoat sexual violence as a topic. People speak in euphemisms. They're not super
clear. And people have been told to feel a lot of self-blame and shame about what they've experienced,
which leads them to not tell us the whole story
because it hasn't been safe
to tell the whole story anywhere else in their life.
And so I agree that if you want to be a researcher,
you really should get a PhD.
I also agree that a lot of the training
that you need will not come from the academy
because my work has been suppressed in a lot of ways.
I know that others on this conversation
have felt similarly at times as well.
I'm not a professor right now.
And part of why I'm not a professor right now
is because it was really hard to get a job
at an academic institution studying what I study,
there were a lot of concerns that bringing me
into a sociology department would be too radicalizing.
But what I want to say is that you'll need training outside of academia too.
And the training that I'd recommend is actually the same trainings
that we've been talking about to be able to do volunteer work for rape crisis centers.
It's something called a 40-hour crisis counselor certification training.
At this point, they're more accessible than ever.
They are a few times a year.
You need to do one for your specific state.
And so you can just search the name of your state.
So I'm in Minnesota.
I would search Minnesota.
Coalition Against Sexual Assault 40-hour or Crisis Counselor Training, it'll come right up.
They are intense.
Usually they run about 40 hours, as you might figure out by the name.
But over the course of two weeks, so that's two weeks of 20 hours of training.
It is all encompassing.
It is difficult.
But I will say all of the best sexual violence researchers have that background in a 40-hour
training, have that background in victim advocacy, because it teaches you things like trauma-informed
interview techniques and gives you a baseline of information about sexual violence that you will not
get from an academic program unless you are incredibly lucky and end up in one of the very few
programs in the country where there is a class about research methods and sexual violence.
They're rare. And then the other thing I'll say is that on this note of retaining your soul
and retaining your values, because there will be a lot of pressure to not publish those
inconvenient truths, you have to have your people. You have to have people who agree and who will
share those convictions and can do things like give you really good feedback. We get so much bad faith
feedback from researchers in this field, people who want to shut down the conversation before they
even read the research. I've had the same experience Jackie has where researchers have tried to push me
to do other work. And then once they read my work, they said, wow, this is so important. But you need
those people who are going to help you get to the point that you have the data that will convince
everyone else and will make sure that what you're putting out is sharing your values, things like
respecting survivors autonomy, being honest about sexual violence. There is a lot of pressure
even in academia to share this misinformation that people don't know is false. They just think that
this thing about sexual assault that everybody says it must be true. And sometimes that's what shows up
in my peer reviews or grant reviews. The way that I met Katie is we were in the same lab group for a little bit
of time. The way I met Jackie is she reached out because she heard we were doing similar
dissertations and just wanted to chat. I've met people at conferences, but don't look at other
people who are doing the same type of research you want to do as competition. They are your
collaborators and you will really need each other to get through it. This is Catherine. And one
less thing that I'll say related to finding your people and getting the training that will be
really essential for doing this kind of research is that my PhD was joint in psychology and
Women's Studies. I'm currently jointly appointed in psychology in women's and gender studies.
It was my education on research in women's and gender studies that really fundamentally shaped
the way that I approach going about research and the way that I think about it. Definitely look for
women's and gender studies programs, critical race studies programs who are on the campuses
because the scholars who are in those areas, obviously not across the board, but often have a much
sort of deeper historical connection to approaching research from a critical way. And I don't mean
critical in terms of like criticizing. I mean thinking very deeply and thoughtfully about the way that we
actually go about research, power relationships within research, what that looks like, especially
if your sort of primary area is one that doesn't have as quite of a long history in terms of
thinking about research critically. This is Nicole. While we're talking about activism and things you can
change, women and gender studies and critical race studies departments are under fire in this political
environment. One of the things you can do to help support researchers like us is doing things like
go to school board meetings. They're mostly full of people who are opposed to this type of research.
My book has been banned in countless university libraries. I've been banned from giving talks
in multiple countless universities across this country. And a lot of how that happens is that there's
nobody there who says that they have an issue with it. Often I'm going up against one person who said
that they think my book is bad or they think my research is bad and that it's
dangerous and it shouldn't be on a college campus. The school being criticized, it's really easy
for them to say, great, we want an excuse to keep this off campus. But they also will say things
like, well, there's nobody here to defend it. And so showing up and defending those of us who are
doing the work already is hugely useful because right now it really is, it's the author versus a whole
slew of conservative groups that are just trying to silence us and trying to erase our research.
We're living through a period where it's not even just that it's hard to produce the research. There
is a desire to destroy the research that already exists. And so one of the things everybody can do
is just keep an eye on these issues. And if there is a meeting about it at your school board meeting,
if you heard something about it at a university, just show up, express your concern. And a little
bit of dissent would go a really long way. Thank you all so much for sharing all of your
expertise so generously. Your perspectives are incredibly valuable and we're so, so grateful to have you.
I'd like to end by hearing again where folks can follow each of you individually and what you've
recently published or are working on that you're excited about.
This is Katie.
I am terrible at social media, but I do make sure that my Google Scholar profile is always
up to date with my research and has all of the articles that are available on it.
You can find any of that work there.
If any of the articles are behind a paywall and you want to access that,
just send me an email and I can send a copy of that.
One project that I am especially excited about right now, me and by fantastic graduate student,
Rebecca Howard Valdivia, just recently published a really large mapping review of over
100 studies that have been done on Title IX and sexual violence and higher education.
That is basically looking at how have schools been implementing Title IX policies and how
effective has that been at addressing sexual violence. Spoiler alerts, they have not been effective.
That was just published earlier this year. It's called Title IX in sexual violence and higher
education, a mapping review and assessment of policy, implementation, and effectiveness that was
published in the Journal of Sex Research. Incredible work, and it couldn't have come out at a better
time for me. So thank you for that, Dr. Holland. This is Nicole. I am spending way too much time on
Blue Sky these days, so you can definitely find me there. My handle's at and
Bidera, I'm around talking about sexual violence. Whenever it comes up in the news, I find that
that's one of the times when it's easiest to reach people to talk about sexual violence is when
they're already thinking about it and they want to know more, but they're afraid and they need
someone who can take that trauma-informed approach to talk about it. That's what I do on my social
media. Occasionally I talk about research and stuff like that too, but it is mostly response to
the news and giving context. Aside from that, Jackie and I work together at a consulting group called
Beyond Compliance Consulting, and one of the projects from research that I did through Beyond Compliance
and that I have coming out, we were just accepted for publication, is a study about how social
media websites respond when survivors ask them to take down non-consensual images like revenge porn
or deepfakes. Big surprise, the big finding was that they engage in institutional betrayal.
We all know that a lot of this stuff is happening in these online spaces too, and that the online
spaces are responding horrifically. And I want to say that it's actually a
a more radical paper than I think a lot of people outside of academia or discussions of the
internet would know because the idea that we're labeling social media websites as institutions can be
regulated is a really hot topic right now. And so we're very excited to be having it come out.
The other thing I want to talk about, and I'm sure Jackie will touch on a bit too, is that we are
trying to open our own national rape crisis center for college sexual assault victims called
the Survivor Alumni Network. We are in the very very very.
very, very early stages, but the thing that we could use help with right now is finding people
who would want to volunteer to give us information about what happened at their schools and the way
their schools handle sexual violence. So you don't have to tell us your whole story. But, you know,
if you have documents or things you learned about that Title IX process along the way, we really
want those. And we also are trying to find people who would want to volunteer and do that training
to become victim advocates that we would then train to be specialized in campus sexual
violence. So if you're interested in that, we'll send a link that hopefully we can have a
show notes where people can just express their interest. You might not hear from us for a little while.
We are in the very early stages, but we know a lot of the listeners might be interested in something
like that. So we want to hear from you if you want to help us out. So exciting.
Yes, this is Jackie. And I am also terrible with social media, but I am very lucky to be in a
partnership with Nicole, who is great at it. You could hear more about our work through the Survivor
alumni network links or through our consultancy beyond compliance, anti-violence consulting.
That is a great place if you wanted to connect with us about our work or you were interested
or you had an issue in your organization that you wanted some feedback on. That's a great
place to reach us as well. Thank you so, so much. This is all very exciting. It feels like such an
honor to be able to connect with y'all this season. I've learned so much through your words and your
and I know the listeners have too.
Your work and your research and your willingness to engage in these stories in such a
thoughtful and nuanced way means more than I can truly express and I think these kinds of
conversations are so, so important.
I hope that for all the young people listening to the podcast who are entering into college
next year or the years following are going to be able to take these tools forward with
them.
So thank you so much for the impact.
you've had on myself and our community. Thank you for having us. And thanks for bringing this conversation
to so many more people as well. Thank you so much and thank you for just addressing this issue. I'm
bringing more attention. I know people in my life have been listening in and learning so much.
It's a really nice way to get research out to audiences. Thank you so much to each and every survivor
and guest for sharing their experiences with us. And thank you for listening. Something was wrong
is a Broken Cycle Media production
created and executively produced
by Tiffany Reese. Thank you
endlessly to our team.
Associate producer, Amy B. Chessler,
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Thank you so much
to the incredibly talented
Abiyomi Lewis for this season's gorgeous cover of Gladrag's original song, You Think You,
from their album, Wonder Under. Thank you to music producer Janice J.P. Pacheco for their work on
this cover recorded at the Grill Studios in Emoryville, California. Find all artist's
socials linked in the episode notes to support and hear more. If you'd like to share your story
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As always, thank you so much for listening. Until next time, stay safe, friends.
