Something You Should Know - How to Deal With Every Jerk You Meet & How to Take Stunning Photos with Your Cellphone

Episode Date: February 19, 2018

Why do you sigh? Usually it is because you feel relief or you are sad or tired. But it turns out there is more to a sigh than you thought. In fact it turns out to be good for you. I’ll explain as I start this episode. The world is full of jerks. And unfortunately you have to deal with them. So what’s the best way? Here with some expert help is Bob Sutton, a professor of organizational behavior at Stanford and author of the book The A**hole Survival Guide (http://amzn.to/2HqacwR). Bob explains why jerks are so jerky and reveals the different categories of jerks and then offers some tactical advice to deal with them and still get what you want. Did you know different airlines have different flying styles? Did you know the armrest closest to the aisle on an airplane that can’t be raised actually CAN be raised if you know a little trick? These are just two of the fascinating behind-the-scenes facts about air travel that we’ll explore. Everyone today has a camera on them almost all the time. And cellphone cameras have gotten pretty good. So, since you may likely be photographing much of your life, why not make those photos the best they can be? Photographer Jim Miotke, founder of www.BetterPhoto.com and creator of the online course Outstanding Photography offer some simple tips and idea that will transform your cellphone photos so they truly capture the moment. Come see my dog Taffy and her new Bark Box on the episode page on the website. Here is the link: http://bit.ly/2HtCYN8 To discover more about Bark Box go to: www.BarkBox.com/something Check out Health IQ. They offer lower rates on life insurance for health-conscious people. See if you qualify by going to: www.HealthIQ.com/something Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As a listener to Something You Should Know, I can only assume that you are someone who likes to learn about new and interesting things and bring more knowledge to work for you in your everyday life. I mean, that's kind of what Something You Should Know was all about. And so I want to invite you to listen to another podcast called TED Talks Daily. Now, you know about TED Talks, right? Many of the guests on Something You Should Know have done TED Talks. Well, you see, TED Talks Daily is a podcast that brings you a new TED Talk every weekday in less than 15 minutes. Join host Elise Hu.

She goes beyond the headlines so you can hear about the big ideas shaping our future. Learn about things like sustainable fashion, embracing your entrepreneurial spirit, the future of robotics, and so much more. Like I said, if you like this podcast, Something You Should Know, I'm pretty sure you're going to like TED Talks Daily. And you get TED Talks Daily wherever you get your podcasts. Today on Something You Should Know, why do you sigh? Usually it's because you're tired, sad, or relieved. But there's also a biological reason that I think you'll find fascinating. Then, you know all those jerks you have to deal with? What's the best strategy to handle them? They call it porcupine power. It's showing a flash of anger and giving them a hint that you're not going to put up with their abuse.

If you've got that kind of jerk on your hand, flashing a bit of porcupine power sends the message to them, no, I am not an easy target. Also, I'll reveal some things about airlines I bet you don't know. And how to take stunning images with your cell phone camera. Whenever you get an opportunity to photograph in the first parts of the day or the last light of the day you're gonna find that there's that golden view you're gonna find a pink hue you're gonna find this dance to the light. All this today on

Something You Should Know. Something You Should Know is sponsored by Health IQ. Health IQ is an insurance company that uses science and data to secure lower rates on life insurance for health-conscious people like runners and cyclists, strength trainers, vegans, and more. If you have a passion for your health, if you take really good care of yourself, there should be a reward for that. And one of those rewards is lower rates on life insurance from Health IQ. It's like people who save money on their car insurance for being a good driver. With Health IQ, you save money on life insurance for living a health-conscious lifestyle. Now, to get these low rates on life insurance, you do have to qualify,

but the rewards are you pay less. To see if you qualify, get your free quote today at healthiq.com slash something. You can also mention the promo code something when you talk to a Health IQ agent, and that lets them know you heard about it on this podcast. That's healthiq.com slash something. Something you should know. Fascinating intel. The world's top experts. And practical advice you can use in your life. Today, Something You Should Know with Mike Carruthers. The interviews in today's podcast are on topics that are about as universal as you can get.

Dealing with jerks, because who doesn't have to do that? And taking better pictures with your cell phone camera. You've got your camera with you all the time now, so why not take better pictures? And you're going to hear some really simple but very effective techniques that will make your pictures look so much better. All that's coming up today, but we start off with a sigh. You know, a sigh. It's defined as a deep, long breath about twice the volume of a typical breath. Tiredness, sadness, and relief can all trigger you to sigh. And some scientists believe that we do it as a way to communicate how we feel. But there's apparently more to it than that. It turns out that the average human sighs about 12 times an hour.

And research from UCLA shows that doing so serves as a sort of stretch for your lungs. That sigh inflates tiny sacs in the lungs where oxygen and carbon dioxide pass in and out of the blood. Normal breathing can't get it done, so if you didn't sigh, your lungs would fail over time. So you should sigh as much as you want. And that is something you should know. You have no doubt had to deal with your share of jerks. The world seems full of them. But have you

ever wondered, why are people jerks? Are real jerks jerks all the time, or are all of us potential jerks under the right circumstances? Perhaps most importantly, when faced with a jerk, what's the best approach to take to get whatever it is you want? Here to discuss that is jerk expert Bob Sutton. He's a professor of management science and engineering and professor of organizational behavior at Stanford, and he's author of the book, The A-Hole Survival Guide, How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt. Hey, Bob, welcome. It's great to be here, Mike. So I like this topic. I think everybody likes this topic, because we all have to deal with jerks in our lives. And I

think one of the questions people have is, well, why are people jerky? Why do they act that way? It doesn't really help anything, so why do people do this? So, researchers have looked at lots of different reasons. If you want to pick the top three reasons, the first thing is when people have power. It's one of the most reliable ways to turn people into somebody who focuses on their own needs and ignores the needs of others. The second thing is being in a hurry. We're all in a hurry. It's like there are many of us. And the third thing is sleep deprivation. And if you want to throw in a little spice in the modern era, it turns out when you don't have eye contact with them, you lose empathy for them and you get nasty. And I think that's not a bad summary of much of modern

life, unfortunately. And by the way, one thing that I would argue is that all of us under the wrong situation can treat other people badly. And there's a tendency to not quite be so self-aware. So it's a big problem. We all have it in varying degrees. And I can look back. I think I'm self-aware enough to know that I have been a jerk to people at times when things are going wrong and I'm frustrated or maybe I haven't had enough sleep and maybe I don't have eye contact with them. So do you think most jerks are self-aware or are they not? So the evidence about self-awareness with jerks is that most of them are remarkably un-self-aware and tend to think that everybody around them is acting like a jerk when, in fact, they're just throwing it back.

And the best way to figure out if you're a jerk is to have someone in your life who is close to you and cares about you and tells you when you've been a jerk. One of my favorite stories is Winston Churchill and his wife Clementine. That was one of the key functions she played in his relationship, and there was a key moment in World War II, 1940 or so, when she literally wrote him a letter and told him, you've got to stop being so unkind because you're undermining your ability to do your job. So we all need somebody like that in our life. But in general, everybody's probably been thought of as a jerk by somebody else at some time in their life because life does that to us.

Yep. I think that's right. And that's not the problem so much as those people who are consistently jerks to everybody or just about everybody. So I make a distinction between a temporary jerk and a certified jerk. So all of us under the wrong conditions can be temporary jerks. And when any of us are in a prolonged relationship, and I focus on the workplace with somebody who treats us badly and leaves us feeling demeaned and de-energized. The evidence, and now we've got literally tens of thousands of studies in all sorts of contexts,

are if you have an ongoing relationship with somebody like that, it's bad for your mental health. It's bad for your productivity. It's bad for your creativity. You're more likely to quit your job. So there's a whole bunch of mental health and also organizational financial implications of it. Wow. So not only does being a jerk have implications, just being around them has implications.

Oh, yeah. So it's contagious. There's a great set of studies that show that nastiness spreads like a common cold. So one of the most reliable ways to turn into a jerk is, and this is the advice I teach at Stanford I always give to my students, look at the people who you are going to work with. You are not going to change them. You are going to become like them.

And it really is very powerful. And that can sometimes be wonderful because, I mean, years ago in the early days of Google, I used to hang around there now and then. And I gave a talk there, and I remember a woman came up to me afterwards and said, so I'm actually not a very nice person, but I have to be nice here to get my work done. So that's the opposite effect. So who you are around has a huge effect. But it only works that one way.

In other words, as you said, if positive people can't turn negative people positive, negative people pull positive people into their hole. Well, the evidence is that bad is stronger than good, so negative emotions are more contagious and more difficult to get rid of. So if you have a nasty supervisor around a bunch of nasty people, it is more contagious. But positivity, although weak, there's even a thing called the five-to-one rule that researchers have shown

that negative emotions and other negative things have five times the impact of positive things. So that's one of the rules is you've got to be relentlessly positive to make up for this negativity. But being in a positive place does help. There are different kinds of jerks, aren't there? I mean, there's the kind of the obvious mean, nasty, treats people like dirt kind of jerk. But other people, you know, they're seemingly nice people, but I still walk away thinking, what a jerk. So I talk about various kinds of jerks, and there's a particular sort of jerk when you've got very good experimental evidence. You might call them a petty

tyrant. So when people have moderate power but don't feel respected, that's when they especially tend to treat other people like dirt because they will wield power just to make themselves feel better. And by the way, the evidence is that if you're dealing with somebody like that, telling them how important they are and how valuable they are, that's one of the best ways to get what you want from them because they're feeling bad about their prestige and recognition. I'm speaking with Bob Sutton. He is a professor of management science and engineering and a professor of organizational behavior at Stanford, and his book is The A-Hole Survival Guide,

How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt. So I'd like you to meet my dog, Taffy. Taffy is a white Jack Russell Terrier, Shih Tzu, and something else. I don't know. But Taffy is a recent recipient of her first BarkBox. And if you have a dog, you have to get BarkBox. It is filled with all natural treats and toys to match your dog's unique needs. These aren't treats you'll find in the supermarket. These are high-quality treats made only in the U.S. or Canada, made by local small businesses. What you do is you tell them the size of your dog, and then you choose the 12, 6, or 1-month plan, and on the 15th of the month, your BarkBox is on its way.

And shipping is free. Now, Taffy's never been big on dog toys, but she got the ones in the BarkBox, and she started flinging them around the room and chasing them. And oh my god, these bacon treats that came, she just craves them. And by the way, if your dog gets something he or she doesn't like, BarkBox will replace it for free. You can check out a picture of my dog Taffy and her BarkBox on the page for this episode on the Something You Should Know website.

And email me a photo of your dog with their first BarkBox and tell me what you think. Here's a special deal for you. For a free extra month of BarkBox, visit BarkBox.com slash something when you subscribe to a 6 or 12 month plan. That's BarkBox.com slash something for a free extra month. People who listen to Something You Should Know are curious about the world, looking to hear new ideas and perspectives. So, I want to tell you about a podcast

that is full of new ideas and perspectives, and one I've started listening to called Intelligence Squared. It's the podcast where great minds meet. Listen in for some great talks on science, tech, politics, creativity, wellness, and a lot more. A couple of recent examples, Mustafa Suleiman, the CEO of Microsoft AI, discussing the future of technology. That's pretty cool. And writer, podcaster, and filmmaker John Ronson,

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That's why we're so excited to introduce a brand new show to our network called The Search for the Silver Lightning, a fantasy adventure series about a spirited young girl named Isla who time travels to the mythical land of Camelot. We'll see you next time. stories remind us all about the importance of kindness, friendship, honesty, and positivity. Join me and an all-star cast of actors, including Liam Neeson, Emily Blunt, Kristen Bell, Chris Hemsworth, among many others, in welcoming the Search for the Silver Lining podcast to the Go Kid Go Network by listening today. Look for the Search for the Silver Lining on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts. So, Bob, it seems as if being a jerk is really in the eye of the receiver. Yep. Somebody might think they're being nice, but if the other person thinks they're a jerk, I guess by definition they're a jerk. Well, so the way that I describe it is that you have a problem with jerks if someone in your life is leaving you feeling demeaned, disrespected,

and de-energized, but you've also got to figure out if it's partly your fault, if you're thin-skinned, if they're treating you like dirt because they're throwing it back. And that's why one of the first things I talk about is kind of diagnosing the situation. So one of the most important things to do is, once again, to have other co-workers, other colleagues, other peers, and to ask them, am I just crazy, or is that person a jerk? And if every single person around you tells you that, yes, I feel demeaned by that person, that's a sign you've got a certified jerk on your hands. But if it's just you, well, there's lots of explanations.

You make an excellent point. Who does these certifications? There's not an official society for labeling jerkdom that I know of. Maybe there should be. You know, I know some jerks who, if they did have that certificate, would hang it on their wall. Oh, yeah. Part of that is this belief that I'm in Silicon Valley that jerks get ahead, and that's sort of taken a hit with Uber and a couple of other situations where we've had sort of jerky CEOs who are losing their jobs. So there's some rethinking of that.

But yeah, there are people who are proud to be jerks and in part to get ahead. So what's the theory, what's the science say of the best way when you're face-to-face with a jerk, what's the best way to respond? Well, I wish there was a one-size-fits-all solution,

but to me, you've got to assess the situation, and the two main things are how much power you have. If you're the CEO, so one of the guys actually blurred my book. His name is Paul Purcell. He's CEO of a company called Baird. It's a big financial services company. And he has a no-jerk rule, and he just fires them. So bless you if you have that much power, right?

But for most of us, the question is, how much power do I have and what exit options do I have? And then you've got to figure out, well, can I get out? Getting out is probably the best solution for most of us. Lots of evidence that people who quit nasty organizations and nasty work groups, they do better. If you can't leave, then maybe you've got to find ways so you don't encounter them quite as much. There's great evidence that if you can get 25 feet away from the local jerk, the chances that you will be infected go way down, for example, like in an open office and stuff. Very good evidence.

And then a lot of us are in situations for short periods of time or long periods of time where we've just got to take it. So that's where you start, you know, say things like it's not my fault, see the humor in it. And then the final thing is, if you have power and you have a posse, then you might want to fight back. What about just in those situations where, you know, it's just momentary, it's the customer service guy or the maitre d' at the restaurant, and he's just, you know, wielding his power in his little kingdom there, and you're trying to get something, and he's in the way.

So is there some tactic there? To me, that's sort of a microcosm of the longer-term situation, which is either you decide you're going to look for your power in the situation and talk to the boss or push back a little bit. So if it's a major deed of a restaurant, you probably aren't going to see them again, and they're not going to be the most important person in your life. So politely pushing back and showing a little bit of a porcupine power might actually work. But the other thing might be there's lots of situations like you're sitting next to somebody in an airplane who's moderately rude but isn't horrible. And that's where you go into what they call time travel or temporal distancing.

And one of the best coping strategies for getting through things that hurt right now is to tell yourself, you imagine it's an hour later, the flight's over. It's a month later, you've gotten through a bad orientation session. It's a year later, and you've gotten through, say, your first year at West Point, one of the examples I use in the book, and you look back on it, and it wasn't so bad. So this idea of time travel or temporal distancing, looking back from the future, there's great studies out of UC Berkeley that show it's one of the most effective ways to avoid overreacting, both in terms of lashing out and in terms of your physical and mental health,

to deal with difficult situations, including somebody who makes you feel like dirt. What about the, and I have a few stories about this, but what about out-jerking the jerk? So out-jerking the jerk works two main situations. One, when you have power, it works. If you're the boss, it works. If you're that really, really important client, it works. The other thing is there's this great research on what they call Machiavellian personality,

and these are often people who were high school bullies, by the way. So these are people who, when they make you feel bad, it makes them feel good, and they don't understand being nice or being flattered. What they understand, they call it porcupine power. It's showing a flash of anger and giving them a hint that you're not going to put up with their abuse. If you've got that kind of jerk on your hands, flashing a bit of porcupine power sends the message to them, no, I am not an easy target.

So doing an assessment of who you're dealing with is very important. I was telling you my story. I was at a show. It was a restaurant, and there was a show. And one of the people in our party was, you had to be 21 to get in, and my nephew was with me, and he was just shy of his 21st birthday. But he doesn't drink. And it was a magic show, and he was just shy of his 21st birthday. But he doesn't drink. And it was a magic show, and he was a magician.

He really wanted to see this. And the guy at the door said, no, no. And he was just a jerk about it. So the guy that was with us pulled him aside, and he said, I'll tell you what we're going to do. You're either going to let us in, or I am going to make the biggest scene here in the lobby and cause so much trouble. And the guy said, right this way, sir, your table is waiting. And we got in and I thought, bravo.

So that was, I love that example, because that's a case where you were talking about petty tyrant, somebody who aren't prestigious but have some influence, that you just sort of showed him that he didn't have as much influence as he thought. Right. I sort of like that story. It was great. And not only did we get in, it just felt so good. You know, it was just because the guy was such a jerk.

He was just, I mean, he couldn't have been jerkier. That said, I always warn people to throw it back or to be nasty in small doses and with proper precautions, because if you do it to the wrong person, well, you can end up in jail and stuff like that, so you've got to be careful. I love that story. Do you think that these jerks, that they feel pretty good about themselves, that they think, yeah, life's going pretty well, I'm pretty good at this. So essentially, to say there's two types of people, it's an oversimplification, but it's true. There's people who are what I would call strategic jerks. These are people who believe that the way they're going to get ahead is by leaving people feeling demeaned,

de-energized, exploiting them, ignoring them. And by the way, there are some organizations in some settings where that actually works. It's a nasty, dog-eat-dog world. But if you can convince them that it's actually not working, then you can make some progress, including some organizations I know that will take star salespeople who treat everybody like dirt and subtract $100,000 from their pay, they learn pretty quick. But the worst ones, and this is the cluelessness we're talking about, people who don't realize that they're treating other people like dirt, they're ignoring them, they're saying insensitive

things to them. And that's a large percentage of them. It's actually more difficult because they first have to reach self-awareness. So a lot of it depends on who you're dealing with. And as I say, the people who are strategic jerks, since they're sort of game players, if you can convince them that it isn't working, including, as I say, one firm I know that subtracted the pay of salespeople, they literally write an A next to their name at the end of the year and go talk to them and say, either you change or we're going to get rid of you and we're going to subtract a bunch of pay for a year.

So once again, know your jerk. Does it ever work when you call people out on it and say, why are you being such a jerk? So yeah, so it does work, especially if they're being clueless and especially if they need you. So those are the two situations. And so one of the classic thing is that if you call somebody out who's being rude and is in a rush, then that really helps. In fact, it's kind of ironic, but I get all these emails. I got an email from a rabbi. This rabbi writes me

that he was really in a rush and was being rude to parishioners and being rude to his cantor and so on. His cantor pulled him aside and said to him, I'm your rabbi, you're supposed to be nice to people, and said, you are treating everybody abruptly and like dirt and leaving people feeling bad. I know you're in a hurry. And this guy was like, oh, I can't believe I was such a jerk. Well, your advice is applicable to everybody. I mean, who doesn't have to deal with jerks? I mean, I don't think a week goes by that you don't come face to face with one of them. So it's good to know how to handle them. But also when what I was a bit surprised to hear is that if you're not careful, you can become one yourself if you hang around the wrong people. My guest has been Bob Sutton.

He is a professor of management, science, and engineering and a professor of organizational behavior at Stanford. And his book is The A-Hole Survival Guide, How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt. There's a link to his book in the show notes. Thanks, Bob. Thanks. Great to talk to you, Mike. Something You Should Know is sponsored by Health IQ. Health IQ is an insurance company that uses science and data to secure lower rates on life insurance for health-conscious people,

like runners, cyclists, strength trainers, and vegans, and more. This is one of those ideas I thought, well, why didn't someone think of this sooner? At Health IQ, they understand the special needs of people who are seriously health conscious. For example, people in great shape often have a low resting heart rate, like endurance athletes. Most insurance carriers will penalize people if their heart rate is too low.

But Health IQ recognizes that this can be a sign of excellent health and fitness. Ensuring healthy people at lower rates is such a great idea, and it clearly fills a need. Health IQ is the fastest-growing life insurance company with over $5 billion in coverage. Do what I did. See if you qualify. Get your free quote today at healthiq.com slash something. You can also mention the promo code something when you talk to a Health IQ agent. That's healthiq.com slash something. Since I host a podcast, it's pretty common for me to be asked to recommend a podcast.

And I tell people, if you like something you should know, you're going to like The Jordan Harbinger Show. Every episode is a conversation with a fascinating guest. Of course, a lot of podcasts are conversations with guests, but Jordan does it better than most. Recently, he had a fascinating conversation with a British woman who was recruited and radicalized by ISIS and went to prison for three years.

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The Jordan Harbinger Show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, everyone. Join me, Megan Rinks. And me, Melissa Demonts, for Don't Blame Me, But Am I Wrong? Each week, we deliver four fun-filled shows. In Don't Blame Me, we tackle our listeners' dilemmas with hilariously honest advice. Then we have But Am I Wrong?, which is for the listeners that didn't take our advice. Plus, we share our hot takes on current events.

Then tune in to see you next Tuesday for our listener poll results from But Am I Wrong. And finally, wrap up your week with Fisting Friday, where we catch up and talk all things pop culture. Listen to Don't Blame Me, But Am I Wrong on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday. The estimate I heard is that we collectively took 1.2

trillion digital photos in 2017, which is about 100 billion more than we took in 2016. We take a lot of pictures. Some of them turn out great, and some of them turn out not so great. But since we are now photographing so much of our lives, why not make those pictures look as good as they can be? And here to help is Jim Miatke. Jim is a photographer. He's founder of BetterPhoto.com,

and he has a course called Outstanding Photography that you can find at his website, betterphoto.com. Hey Jim, so nowadays everybody has a camera with them at all times because there's one in their phone. So how do you as a professional photographer rate those cameras? Do you think cell phone cameras are pretty good cameras? Yeah, actually I do. There are limitations when it comes to creative outdoor photography, but I find myself using my smartphone a lot because it's so convenient. And the camera technology on the upper end phones has grown and improved so much over the years that it's quite good. So you may not be able to control things like shutter speed to get a certain creative effect

when you're doing like, you know, super creative photography, but you can definitely control your compositional choices and you can make I'm seeing photographers both professionals and hobbyists making stunning photos even with a smartphone yeah I've seen those some of those commercials for I guess it's for the iPhone where people uh that where they show the photographs that people have taken with an iPhone and I I think, wow, that is amazing. Yeah, it really does color and sharpness quite well. You know, and like I said, if you just do a few tips compositionally, you can get super creative photos and you can express your experience of life, whether it's taking pictures of your kids or, you know, or photographing what you're going about during your day.

You can make photos that are quite balanced or eye-catching, not just capturing the subject, but capturing it creatively. So let's talk about that, because I'm one of those photographers who, well, calling myself a photographer is a bit of a stretch, but I'm one of those people who takes pictures who very often looks back later at the picture and is disappointed that, you know, it didn't really capture the moment. It isn't what I'd hoped it would be. So what am I doing wrong? What mistakes am I making and how do I fix them? I'll tell you, Mike, so often I get emailed with people just at the end of their rope, just so disappointed in the fact that they're not able to capture the beauty that is front of them or what their eye sees, the colors and the boldness.

So one thing I would say, first of all, is make sure that you're not just thinking about your subject, but also consider your background. Really make it a habit to think about and choose carefully what background you have. You may just need to change your point of view and eliminate some things that are trying to enter in and steal the show from your main subject. So think about like, well, what's really going on with my background? And then when it comes to your foreground or your main subject, make sure that it's as upfront and close as you can. And then consider putting it off to the side instead of right in the center. A common mistake that people do is just photograph

that person or that subject right in the middle of the photo. And that kind of just lets the eye sort of fall off the picture one way or the other. But if you put it off to the side and balance it with something in the background, that's when it gets really fun. Consider your background, choose it carefully, and then make sure that you're really focusing on that foreground subject. Well, it does seem that photographs with people, or maybe pets, but photographs with people are

much more interesting and better than just, ooh, look at this pretty view of the Grand Canyon, and it's just the Grand Canyon. I love including the human element in my nature photos whenever I can. Now, some people, they just really love nature in its purity, and that's what they want to capture and that's perfectly fine. You're photographing say the arches or some beautiful seascape or some snow-capped mountains and you just want to capture that, that's perfectly great. But we love to look at pictures of people. It's a common thing that I see in our contest, and it's a common thing that I see in social media is more eyes are drawn to pictures with people or animals in them. I've heard advice like if you're taking pictures of kids to get down to their level. Yes, is that generally a good idea? Oh, it's so good, Mike. It's like something that very few people know to do or think to do.

So just by doing it, you immediately put yourself in the top 90% of kid photography. You put yourself up in the upper echelons because getting down on their level and photographing eye to eye is so much more unique than the typical adult looking down. You can even get even more creative and get down on your belly and look up at them. Or sometimes I like to get on a three-foot step ladder and use my camera and photograph down so that you see this huge head and these tiny little feet. You know, you do whatever you can to get something that's unique because that is what's going to catch the eyes. Perhaps the most common photograph today is the selfie. So what makes a good selfie and assuming there is such a thing and what makes a bad one?

Selfies are so prolific. The most favorite selfies that I see are when people are including others, you know, you have a relationship going on, you have a group of friends or your family, and you're all in the background. I love a selfie that is a little less self-oriented. So you might have just your eyes peeking over the bottom edge and it looks comical and you have all your friends or family in the background behind you. You can use a device. You can use one of those sticks that will hold the camera a little bit further away. I don't use one, but you know, it may give you a more wide angle shot that includes more. And then it's just a matter of take several photos. So you make sure that you get one that's sharp and one where everybody has

their eyes open, they're looking at the camera and they have a great natural smile on their face. What about in general, should selfies be taken from up to down, down to up, straight on, off to the side? Yeah, I recommend that you go a little bit up, especially for women. There's a view from a little bit above looking down so that it causes your head to tilt up a little bit. And, you know, I say that because us men, we generally like anything will go for us. But if you want to have that complimentary look, you go a little bit up and then go down. And I do that when I'm, you know, photographing a more professional portrait of a person as well. I try to get just a little bit up so it causes them to hold their chin just slightly up. And then it's the most important thing is engaging. So, you know, if you're photographing yourself or a group, if you just,

you know, let your hair down, so to speak, and remember that it's not about you. Nothing in life is about you. And think about how you're just expressing joy and love, then that's where you get the natural expression that really comes through as authentic and happy and love, then that's where you get the natural expression that really comes through as authentic and happy and joyful, which is what people really want to see. We've been talking a lot about what makes a good picture, but what do people do that screws it up? Probably one of the most common mistakes is to photograph where everything is just too far off in the distance and there is no foreground object, nothing that the eye can really settle upon. Another common mistake is that we photograph at times of the day when the light is just kind of dull or flat. There's nothing really magical happening with it. So whenever you get an

opportunity to photograph in the first parts of the day or the final moments, just the last light of the day, you're going to find that there's that golden view. You're going to find a pink hue, you're going to find this dance to the light. If you also see like a foggy day, go ahead and photograph like crazy because the fog will have things in the background disappearing into the mist and it'll add this mysterious element to the photo. A bright overcast day can be a fantastic time to photograph pictures of your friends and family. But once the light level gets a little bit too low, then it's just, it's blah. It's kind of like lacks that oomph. When people take pictures, they go, okay, let's take a picture. Okay, well, get over here so we have the light shining on you. But then often the sun is shining on them

and they're all squinting because the sun is so bright and then the picture gets washed out. And so what generally, if everybody's standing in the front yard and says, okay, let's take a picture, what's the best way to approach that picture if you're doing that like in a typical sort of midday situation the best thing is to find something in open shade if you can if you can find something where it's in shade but it's out in the open so it's nice and bright then you can allow all those light beams to be reflected and bounced back and forth to everybody. Now, the portrait or the group photo might be a little bluish in that open shade. So it might need to have a little filter to warm it up a little bit.

But that's a beautiful way to make it so that everybody's comfortable. The other case is going back to that bright overcast. And then a third situation is if you are photographing at the sunset time or, you know, if by some crazy chance you happen to be a morning person and you're photographing in the first part of the day, then if you have people facing the light source, looking at the sunrise or the sunset, it will be so diffused by going through the atmosphere that it will be a lot less intense usually. How much of good photography do you think happens after the fact now? Whereas before, you know, you'd get your pictures developed and they came in the mail or they came from the photo mat or whatever it was, and there were your pictures. But now you can go in and do all kinds of things. Do you do that with everyday pictures,

or do you think that it's best to leave them the way they were done? I definitely think that it is best to enhance them after the fact. And I know that that might make some people feel a little frustrated, but the frustration comes from the fact that it takes a little bit of learning. You know, we're all really busy in life and there's a lot of things going on. But if you can just devote a little bit of time to learning how to work with the photo after the fact, it will set you apart so, so much. But what is the one thing? Because you could spend a lot of time and a lot of money on all these programs, working with your photos after the fact to make them look good. And most people aren't going to do that.

But what is the one thing, if you had to pick one, that people might want to do that could make the most difference? That's a great question. And the one thing that I would recommend is learning how to adjust the exposure so that you bring up the exposure a little bit and darken the shadowy areas of your photo a little bit. It's a way of adding contrast but I don't recommend people necessarily jump right to the contrast controls. You really want to increase the exposure of the bright areas and darken the shadowy areas to make it pop more

I'll give you one little bonus tip too and that's if you can slightly vignette your photo you know how when you look at a photo and the corners are a little bit darker well if you do that, that will really make your scene pop now you want to make sure that you do it subtly so that you make the effect happen, you darken those edges, and then you back it out just a little bit so it's almost subconscious. And it's just this slight, slight darkening of the edges. Are there any apps that you can put on your phone?

I mean, I know there's a lot of photo apps, but ones that you like in particular that can help people take better pictures. I use a couple apps that I like. There's one app that slows the shutter or creates an effect of a slow shutter. So you can get kind of a blurred motion kind of creative effect. But I don't use any of the little add-on lenses myself. I just like to keep it simple. And then I use what's called a mirrorless camera for when I want to get even more creative. It's so much smaller than my old digital SLR camera, which is just collecting dust now. But it allows me to get creative. It's kind of like in between

the smartphone and the big, bulky digital SLR. What are the apps you use? So one is called Slow Shutter, and that gives me that slow shutter speed effect. And then the other apps I use are all the social media sharing apps, Instagram. I like Google Photos for, you know, in putting all my photos up and, you know, they automatically put them into little movies or animations or albums. And it's a fun way to share things very, very quickly. I also use an app for telling when the sunrise and the sunset is happening. And I think that app is just called Sunrise Sunset. And that allows me to know exactly when to be out photographing.

Well, as someone who is so often disappointed in the results of my photography, I appreciate your tips and suggestions. And I'm sure everyone else listening can use a few of them at least to help up their game as well. Jim Miatke has been my guest. He is the founder of BetterPhoto.com, and the course he's offering is called Outstanding Photography. It's an online course that you'll find at his website, BetterPhoto.com. Thanks, Jim. Thanks, Mike.

Even if you're an experienced flyer, there are always things to learn about airlines and airplanes and how they work and what you can and can't do and what you should and shouldn't do. For example, you know how all the armrests can be raised except the armrest on the one right next to the aisle? Well, it turns out you can raise that one. There's a small button in a little divot on the underside of the armrest, and it can be useful to lift that up if you want to spread out a bit more. However, some flight attendants may tell

you to put it back in place because that helps keep everything in your seat and out of the aisle. Airlines have different flying styles. Southwest, for example, tends to climb quickly and then request direct routing shortcuts from air traffic control since they're above most conflicting traffic. It's one of their signature tricks, and it usually works. It can cut significant time off the flight. American airlines, on the other hand, doesn't tend to climb quickly. They tend to be gentle for efficiency

and passenger comfort. Dogs hate flying. Everybody knows that. And the agents who work with the dog and load them onto the plane, they talk to the dog to try to calm the dog down. So having your dog's name on the crate is an excellent idea.

That way, the agent can talk to the dog by name. If you're traveling with a cat and you're concerned about their comfort, don't be. They couldn't care less. Cats take flying all in stride. The reason they tell you to put your oxygen mask on first and then assist a child is because at 40,000 feet, you only have up to maybe 20 seconds of breathing normal air before you become unconscious. It's not a problem if a child becomes unconscious for a few seconds, as they will regain consciousness when the oxygen mask is put on.

But if you're unconscious, you can't help them get their oxygen mask on. And that is something you should know. We have great advertisers on this podcast. They're all vetted. They're all checked out. They're all very cool companies. I personally have used most of their products. And you can show your support for this podcast by checking out the advertisers that sound interesting to you. I'm Micah Ruthers. Thanks for listening today to Something You Should Know.

Do you love Disney? Do you love top 10 lists? Then you are going to love our hit podcast, Disney Countdown. I'm Megan, the Magical Millennial. And I'm the Dapper Danielle. On every episode of our fun and family-friendly show, we count down our top 10 lists of all things Disney. The parks, the movies, the music, the food, the lore. There is nothing we don't cover on our show. We are famous for rabbit holes, Disney-themed games, and fun facts you didn't know you needed. I had Danielle and Megan record some answers to seemingly meaningless questions. I asked Danielle what insect song is typically higher pitched in hotter temperatures

and lower pitched in cooler temperatures? You got this. No, I didn't. Don't believe that. About a witch coming true? Well, I didn't either. Of course, I'm just a cicada. I'm crying.

I'm so sorry. You win that one. So if you're looking for a healthy dose of Disney magic, check out Disney countdown, wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Jennifer, a founder of the go kid go network.

At go kid go, putting kids first is at the heart of every show that we produce. That's why we're so excited to introduce a brand new show to our network called the search for the silver lining, a fantasy adventure series about a spirited young girl named Isla who time We'll see you next time.