Son of a Boy Dad - 100k YouTube Subscribers | Son of a Boy Dad #155

Episode Date: December 6, 2023

100k YouTube Subscribers | Son of a Boy Dad #155 -- Thank you for 100k, go subscribe if you haven't yet.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. The audio is good. Alrighty, welcome back to the Son of a Boy Dad live podcast. Today it is Decembercember 6th 2023 we are here from hq4 and we are live more live than ever what is our plan for re-entering the stratosphere of barstool brother we're in it right now mr hitchings is in our stream that says that's all we need right there so we're so

we're locked so we're this is our this is permanent for us what do you mean this space oh no i thought you meant like the actual barstool world i have no idea i don't have plans i'm more of a take it day by day kind of person yeah got my slippers on gonna play some fortnight later you have a emerging pimple on the side of the right side of your nose. Oh, no, that's not emerging. That's reverse emerging. Demerging? Yeah, it's demerging.

No, I still see a thick white head in the midst of that. You want me to get it for you? No, that's been there, though. I think I popped it yesterday, and it re-grew. It's the longest my nails have ever been in my life. I could pop that bitch real good for you. Are you sure? One of my biggest pet peeves is when my nails are long,

so I cut them like twice a day. But nail biting is such an indicator of mental illness that I just can't be doing it. Really? You don't have to bite your nails because nail clippers are pretty accessible. Nail biting is an indicator of

mental illness oh big time anybody who has like nails bitten down to the nubs and they like appear to be okay there's something really bad going on i don't even have nails these are bitten down to the nub i bite them down really yep yep but i know that i'm troubled yeah that is a troublesome thing oh also why wipe my nails farther just to make sure people know right it's a cry for help signal yeah i need to take another quarter inch off francis are you painting your nails red or is that just blood have you bitten them down to where they don't exist anymore you sound good though buddy thank you yeah you sound sick as fuck and i'm a little worried about it when you said you were sick i won't lie i did a little shit talking you thought i was faking it i thought i assumed you were one of those people

who gets like a stuffy nose and they're like oh my god i'm in shambles right now and then you showed up here i was like my god Stay home next time, brother. Look at the amount of space. You get him laughing. I mean, you have fucking the swine flu right now. This is what you get for doubting me. Yeah, you are sick as fuck. I'm not going to play the game where I get closer to you today.

No, I'm okay with that. Out of respect. Because you know that's something. Me and Ron are hogging this right now. Get over here. You got a couple inches over on this. Wait, don't you have masks? I'll put one on if you want.

No, no. I don't actually give a fuck. I would love to get sick. I would kill to get sick and just not have to do anything this weekend. Well, hi. Aside from sit here and play video games. That would be unbelievable. But Francis seems too sick to even play video games.

There's no such thing as being too sick to play video games. I don't know why I did this. I agreed to ride over on a city bike again. Yeah, that had to have made you double the amount of sick. I haven't been able to do anything for three days. It's snowing. I rode a city bike with Roan across the fucking Manhattan Bridge. Along the way, we're riding abreast of each other, which is what we like to do.

It's the only way we can hear each other talk. Next to each other. Some guy was coming from the opposite direction oh yeah flying the bend yeah and he goes look out and ron goes cry about it bitch no francis was like sorry and this guy was like fuck you assholes oh yeah and i was like yeah but you said sorry before anything happened and he still decided to say fuck you assholes oh i think once you say sorry you kind of you give them the past to to be to be like oh shit i wasn't even the wrong but now they and i was i i didn't think i was in the i didn't think they were in the wrong but now you're giving me an opportunity to be like fuck you i'm a biker right i know that

bikers are the worst people on the fucking planet but what do you mean by bikers because there's a big difference between like bikers oh this guy was the real deal he was like uber eats drivers this guy had a mustache skinny jeans yeah like a park or like a sound like an uber eats driver right no no no no he was like he had his own bike like a skinny little rickety like 70s fucking frame bike and telltale sign he was fat like he's like a fat biker like a fucking all black squeeze into his skinny jeans like he's definitely an ipa guy yeah yeah definitely takes the messiest fattest shits the fucking grossest shits not like me and francis who take cute little double tapered ribbons these beautiful fucking lovely confetti shits that we take just the cute as a button

meanwhile this guy's fucking taking slogs of bogs in the bowl it's fucking nasty so i've been taking some on some just i don't even know i don't have words i'm out of words for the shits that i've been taking but i'm the same way as these bikers like it's it's like how uh batman turns into a different person when the mask hits his face when the bike seat hits my ass i turn into an asshole too and i'm firing back at fucking everybody i need to start wearing the the video glasses when i come in just so i can document some of it because francis got to see some of it live it's nasty i'm screaming it i'm screaming at people you did and and then we came around the bend and this guy like was way below us now and his thing looped back around

and so you doubled down measure roan yelled again that's awesome fuck you your children are quietly homosexual yeah something like that something i don't know what he said it was uh it was i mean i was just ready for i was ready for war against this guy and me and francis being together just industrializes me even more you were showing off we strengthen numbers well not even showing off but it's just more fun it's like we can just like we have something to like giggle about as we fight he he he's more evil than i am and and i riding a bike with roan to me is scary because he seeks trouble that i wouldn't it's to me riding a bike with roan i was thinking it's probably like making love to chris d'alia like it's his way yeah no matter what we're doing it on his terms and i'm like all right i guess you know yeah i am going the wrong way down or like i'll just like whip down a road but i try to i try to be

deferential i try to go 50 50 like let you lead some of the time you do and that's nice but uh but when i'm leading i'm fucking dragging us yeah we're going the wrong way up we took a wrong way up a one way that had outdoor seating for restaurants on both sides so the road was as narrow as one of those walking streets in like rome or something and there was a whole line of cars that were trying to come and he just we just went up against it you're bobbing and weaving huh you were bobbing and weaving huh you were bobbing and weaving oh big time yeah you gotta come bike with us sometime hell no biking in the city scares me ever since i almost got pinched in between the curb and 18 wheeler my biking days have been done

also i would i used to not know the rules of the road so i would bike down the lanes going the opposite way and people would be like fuck you that's exactly what we're talking about yeah and i'll be like i don't know what you guys are talking about i'll be like i don't know what i'm doing wrong but people seem to be very unhappy with me have you guys seen the videos of that guy and he just had his moment in the sun this week on twitter with all of these like kind of right-wing accounts being like fuck bikers but this guy is like the quintessential new york biker and he's just like nice bike you got there like asshole for anybody that's walking in the bike lane or like hey buddy bike lane and he's just snapping at everybody old ladies fat people invalids foreign people who's

like it's their first day in america and they think it's just a good place to pull their cart like he just is the uh apex predator asshole biker is he biking he's biking and okay i think you've showed me this guy before probably but he's just making he makes his rounds and he just puts his shit out every day there's a sanctimoniousness that comes with bikers i know i'm an asshole i know i'm in the wrong almost all the time but you just have to be ready for war when you're on your fucking steed yep yep which i and you guys are riding it. Have you guys ever thought about buying a bike?

The city bike stuff is so accessible. Yeah. So no need to buy one. I mean, what do you guys think that public transit should be free? Yeah, I'm sure that's a probably pretty universal thought. But it's pretty cheap. I mean, they do a good job. These days it's bad.

thought but it's pretty cheap i mean they do a good job these days it's bad what troubles me is why am i paying two dollars and 75 cents or whatever it is when i watch three people in front of me hop the turnstile or just walk through that open fire door i've walked through the open fire door and i've and i've hopped the i've popped the turnstile but so i don't know it's just like one of those things where it's like i don't have to stress about it if I just pay the $2. In Sweden, there's like a group that you can join. You like pay dues to a federation, and everybody in the federation is fair Dodgers. Like everybody does it. And so the money that you're paying is to like pay for your tickets, fines, or litigation if you get in trouble.

Dude, it's the crackhead again. It's the same fucking guy. Where is he? Oh, yeah. Looks like he might be breaking into a car now. He's definitely breaking into a car. So that dude on Monday, he smoked crack under that stairwell. We were kind of joking at first being like oh he's

smoking crack and then he started uh rocking back and forth aggressively indicating that he was absolutely smoking crack also while we're at it please subscribe to the podcast because we are very close to 100 000 subscribers and if you subscribe if you get us to 100 000 we will give you live updates on this crackhead so is he he's he's like at the side of a car is he looking at his reflection the side of the car is he about looking at his reflection in the side of the car? Is he about to break in or is he like discoursing with somebody who has a Jeep with a jersey license plate over there? It looks like he's probably looking in his reflection. He's probably getting like a shave in.

If I had to guess. He's getting the crack out of his teeth. Two cars and a woman was using the fender on the other car as her toilet seat. Oh, yeah. Yeah yeah nothing wrong with that and i came up behind her and she um i don't even know how but i saw that i could see the pee coming out of her vagina oh and then her but that's yeah we've talked all spread it was pretty gross was she dumping no she was peeing but you because it's from behind she was squatting everything was visible so tough for girls to pee in public like that as opposed to guys who can just whip out a penis and like spray it like it's fun yeah like it's

like a fire hose you could just spray it in any direction girls peeing in public is a whole thing that's like a scene it's a nightmare you can't just pull over and just piss on the street if you're a girl you need everybody needs to like get together in a pact and like make a wall around a woman if they're gonna pee in public the girl wants to pee in public they have to go like two miles into the woods and then you can still hear it because it's a goddamn fire hydrant slap in the ground like a fucking defender like in a basketball court slap in the court just loud ass pee like when you're throwing away like empty beers the night after drinking and there's one that's full and you got to empty it into the sink and it's emptying for a suspicious amount of time and it's like

yeah yeah it's not a steady stream it like glugs out this is why i just have so much empathy for our sisters out there how just the way i don't understand god sometimes why he made it so fucking unfair why he made it so sweet to be a man with a fucking pointy dick i mean if god made them however many hundreds of thousands of years ago, or I don't know what the timeline is, at what point is it their fault for not evolving? And what? Growing a penis? Finding a way to pee standing up.

Yeah, growing up. In a less vulnerable position. Maybe that's what trans is. They're evolving into being able to pee while standing. And we all look at that. People, we obviously we accept them but people look at them and they're like that's weird and what they're really doing is they're evolving into becoming creatures that can yeah right in front of our eyes we're gonna do away with traditional vaginas trans trans trans could be like a evolution happening right in front of our

eyes and we're just all not like i'm sure back when like the apes were like the first ape turned into a human people were probably like what the fuck is that freak yeah there's probably eight protests we're not gonna change our bathrooms for you there was probably eight podcasters like fucking matt walsh yeah exactly like yeah what the fuck is wrong with these apes? Why are his thumbs working suddenly? Yeah, that's nasty work for them. Well, it's 3 p.m., which means it's time to get the leaf blower out, even though every single leaf has fallen from the trees. That's not a leaf blower. It is.

It's every day. Every day this person gets out right at 3 p.m. and they start leaf blowing. There's no leaves on the streets. There's literally none. I'm looking leaf blowing. There's no leaves on the streets. There's literally none. I'm looking right now. There's three leaves. I can count the amount of leaves in that tree right now. He should just blow them off the tree. Genocide the rest of the leaves away so he can be done for the rest

of the winter. Who cares that much about the street outside of their apartment that they're bringing out a leaf blower and they're blowing the leaves. What are you doing? What is this? Why are they doing this i can't believe we're on the same circadian rhythm as that crackhead oh yeah i cannot believe we saw the same crackhead but he had a whole different fit on which means that he has like a closet to go back to he's coming he's he's figuring it out is he still there no no moved on. But I guess this is like a beautiful place to do crack.

One of the most picturesque streets to smoke crack in all of New York. Right. There's a little bit of hubris involved thinking that we're the only ones who can, us non-crack users are the only ones who can pick out a beautiful street. That's right. He can pick out a beautiful street. Why is he relegated to a ninja turtle lifestyle if he wants to do crack he could do crack and in beauty i think the crack community probably shares a lot of uh

characteristics with the weed community where they always are seeking out like a good spot to smoke you think so yeah and i think it's probably just a little more frowned upon like i'm sure smoking crack under the bridge under a bridge is probably i'm sure there's a reason they do it other than just not getting caught. There has to be a resentment towards the weed community big time by the crack community. They're like, oh, they took all of our spaces. They're completely destigmatized

while we carry this massive stigma around. Do you think there's anyone who... I'm sure there's been people back when weed wasn't as legal as it is now. I'm sure there were people who moved to colorado to smoke weed to be like weed's legal there let's move to colorado and really embrace our true colors big time there's people who are like moving to like portland and seattle because they're like

the crack out there's better it's like they're like moving their families like the gold rush yeah let's smoke crack and we'll run there the oregon trail took like 36 months this takes like probably an hour and a half if you smoke crack you could run to from new york to seattle in less than a day easily the only thing is like you need a camelback full of crack to just keep the crack going. It wouldn't even be broken up into like increments of like rest stops. It would be broken up into

like pits of crack. It's like the Underground Railroad of crack stops. Yeah, one hit of crack could take you probably to like Chicago. And we heard that there's some friendlies up in Chicago that have beautiful rocks. And then maybe you got up to like the Dakotas after the second hit.

A safe, beautiful spot for you to hang out and smoke some crack rocks. Yeah. By the bean. One strong hit of crack, you're going. I think one big hit of crack, you could probably go from New York to Seattle inattle you're wrong two stops problem with crack is that it's so fleeting in its high it only lasts for a certain amount of time that's right maybe you're thinking of meth no i'm thinking of crack meth lasts for a long time smoked crack uh you smoke meth that's what makes crack so addictive because you need it constantly so quickly and the high is

so intense that you have to try to recapture it quickly interesting i don't know if i've told this story before but there was a guy who was like the manager of the roots he talked about like uh it was like the band yeah it was the 80s and this guy they were like passing a bong around in the studio and this like quintessential pimp purple suit big hat came in with some fucking i think it was probably it was either crack or just pure beautiful cocaine and the bong went around and he fucking packed the fucking bong up with basically crack yeah and they're like where he just started smoking it and pass it around this guy was like all right and just took a hit of it and he said that he started fiending for more as he watched the bong move around the

room like the bong was going around and he was like i fucking need more of that like he felt it descend on his body so palpably yeah right away as it fucking just the bong was being passed i remember when i was really young way too young to be reading this but i read on like reddit some dude talking about how the first time he did meth and he said that he was at a concert and people were like smoking a bowl of meth or however you smoke meth. And he said that he smoked it, got super high, whatever. And then he like threw it away. And then he woke up, like he went home, went to bed. And then he woke up out on the street like clawing at the ground trying to figure out where he put the meth so he could smoke more of

it so his body just went into his body just went into autopilot yeah and just took over and was like time to go find more meth yeah that's so nuts some people's brains just have to be predisposed to that kind of thing 100 because i feel like I could smoke meth and then just like play video games and be like, all right, never again. Just kidding. I could never do that. You could do meth. Take a little taste of it.

Not interested? No, I'm saying. That's more your thing? You remember in The Odyssey when Homer wanted, excuse me, when Odysseus wanted to hear the song of the sirens? Yeah, I've never seen The Odyssey. What is it, a book or something what is the odyssey a book is it like a bible book or some shit one of the most famous books of all time it's like homer that he had the the odyssey

the iliad uh he's just like it's like canon's like the most, one of the most famous books ever. A lot of stuff is based on. Sounds terrible. You've read it? I mean, we had to for school. Some, probably some like young adult version. Did you read it too? Probably. Damn.

I should order it on my Kindle. Everyone knows the story. Odysseus goes to the war, the Trojan war. No, I promise you, not everyone does. So Troy, have you seen the movie Troy? No. Okay, well, that's Brad Pitt at his hottest. Really? Oh, my God. I just watched The River Runs

through it, and that might be Brad Pitt at his hottest. That is Brad Pitt. Well, Fight Club. No, Brad Pitt. The River Runs through it. He's a boy. Yeah. He's so innocent. You guys are exposing yourselves as pedos. He's a man.

He's like my age. What's his abs look like? They don't show his abs. They don't even need to. They don't even need to. The abs won't even do anything. At this point, you're already like, he's the hottest alive. He's lean as hell in Fight Club.

He's buff as hell in Troy. He's cool in this. Buff as hell in Troy. He looks great in Troy. He's cool in this. I didn't get in at all last night, but I'm still on time for fishing. Exactly, yeah. That part's awesome. Sorry, I didn't get in late. Well, I didn't get in at all.

Yeah. In Montana, there's three things we're on. What does he say? He's like, there's three things we're on time for. Yeah, probably church, fishing, and... I forget what the third is. In the chat, please. I mean things we're on. What does he say? He's like, there's three things we're on time for. Yeah, probably church. Church. Fishing. I forget what the third is. In the chat, please.

I mean, we're not going to look at it, but you have to sound off where you think Brad Pitt is the hottest. And I think it's one of the two that I'm talking about. Well, I think probably from a woman's. What is the other one that he's in where he plays another young boy? Thelma and Louise. Thelma and Louise, yeah. Yeah, but we don't. It's not for the female gaze. It's for the male gaze.

But I feel like the female gaze it's for the male but i feel like the female gaze would probably say that he's hottest and like this is what you're talking about i think the female gaze they probably say that he's the hottest in like once upon a time in hollywood or some shit like when he's old and like no and like he was a sex symbol at that young age you think or i guess i don't know i have no idea since 11 you know all that when he was married to jen aniston yeah yeah yeah troy wait but what were you what were we just talking about oh elliot the odyssey yes you're starting the odyssey homer on his way home there's a famous part where he there's the sirens that sing the beautiful songs the most beautiful sound that any man can hear.

Heroin. And anyone who hears that song is so overcome by it that they throw themselves from their ship and dash themselves upon the rocks and die, which is why the sirens sing to them. And Homer, excuse me, Odysseus, Jesus, wants to be the only man who can hear the song and survive it. So he tells his men to fill their ears with, like, broccoli or something, like stuff their ears with leaves, and they do. And then he tells them, or before that, he tells them to lash him to the mast. And no matter what he does no matter what he says they can't untie him

and so they fill their ears they tie him up and they hold him down and then he hears the songs and he's like let me go let me go take that cauliflower out of your ears I need to go be with these sirens but they don't like Harvey Dent like tied up

so so he hears the song and he survives it and and they go in his way so my point being that's like meth you could yeah you might be that guy so you think i could smoke meth once and you guys can just hold me down and i'll be like take the cauliflower out of your ears i need to to find more math. Yeah, I wonder what the fuck are you talking about, dude? I don't know what the metaphor is. It would be one hit, right? It's like all you get is one hit of crack. And you're like, no, I said, I know what I said, but I didn't mean it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm fine. I can have one more. And we're like, no, we've got cauliflower in our ears. We need to do that we need to try that that would be great for the podcast if we did a live episode that started out with me smoking meth once just one just one hit of meth which clearly we could easily find we could just go outside and ask that dude for whatever he's smoking it could be crack it could be meth

and then we would just there has to be a little bit underneath that uh yeah i could walk outside right now and just grab us some meth just grab a rock yeah and then we could i would start out with me smoking the meth and then you guys holding me down as i tell you guys to pull the cauliflower out of your ears and try and escape to get more meth but we would end the podcast after one hour be like okay that was good that was fun and then i would definitely go get more yeah for the next 23 hours you'd be in fucking hell yeah or you'd turn into it would be a lifestyle into time square instantly yeah how fast do you think you could acquire meth me you earn let's say let's say crack not meth i feel like meth has to be harder to find in the city.

Because meth is more of a down south thing. It's not for us like normal looking... You definitely know a dude that could sell you crack within the next hour. At 9pm on a Thursday you walk by 10 guys who are going, Charlie

we... I got money. But I think that I think you guys are one of them. We have undercover cop vibes, though. That's what I'm saying. You have the undercover cop vibes of the dude that was carrying the boom box on the subway.

With the fucking and one shorts on. They always have the nicest shoes on. It's like, I got Jordans on. Black Air Force Ones. Heard this is what the brothers are wearing these days. Where can I get some crack, fellas? Where can I get some of that Zaza?

I feel like I would be able to get crack the easiest. Why? Hate to break it to you guys. I just don't think anyone's selling you guys crack. Yeah, I think if I just went out in my normal day-to-day outfit people would be like yeah but how much do you also give undercover cop vibes no way i'm too young to be undercover cop but that's what undercover cop would say what about that they weren't saying that and to catch a predator well that's probably

exactly what they're saying i know i don't give undercover cop i know i don't give undercover cop vibes because the place right by my apartment they, they will sell me menthol jewel pods, which are not legal. And they go, we only have tobacco. And I go, I know you guys have menthol. And then they go, all right, we'll give you the menthol. Menthol is illegal? You guys would go in there and they'd be like, we only have tobacco. Sorry, my bad.

I think you're wrong about this. I think that I would have the easiest time because I'm trying the least hard to not look like an undercover cop. But you also, dude, they're not going to sell someone crack who clearly has never done crack. Yes, they will. No, they won't. What are you talking about? Bro. You think these drug dealers have scruples?

Or they probably want to put the hook in a new customer. That's not for you. Let me start you on something a little milder. You probably want some of this cheaper weed. You may think you want that, but look at yourself, son. It's way too addictive. Yeah, you're on track. No, you'll just be back here tomorrow asking me for more.

You'll just be back here spending more money on crack. I don't want that. you're spending more money on crack i don't want that i didn't get into this game to hook 34 year old sweater wearing well-to-do well-groomed men on crack if anything they overcharge him for crack you may be like charged a lot of money for crack not me yeah that's street prices that's exactly right street prices and also i honestly don't think they're going to even sell it to you if that if you went up to that crackhead, he would start running the other way. I can't believe crackhead exists. I wouldn't be trying to buy it from a crackhead. We would dap up like we were old friends.

I'm not trying to buy crack from a crackhead. Who are you trying to buy it from? The source. Oh, so you're going to the top dog. I'm going to the shipping container. Okay. I'm going to the docks. Going to China.

Going to the docks. Going to the fentanyl factories out in China. I'm breaking that thing open with a crowbar. Raking down through all the pineapples until we get to a fucking shrink raft. He's going straight to the Sinaloa cartel. And I go, bingo. All right. Crack cocaine.

So I think we've got two different ideas of where we're buying crack from. You're going to the direct source you're like fucking the dude an american gangster denzel my way of doing it is going to be going to vietnam to buy the crack i have a good feeling i'm gonna like it so so you want a lot i'm gonna want a lot yeah yeah i'm not gonna want to get ripped off yeah you're gonna go to costco and flash a card buy in bulk and be able to go home with a pallet of crack not you don't want to be going out every day to buy a new crack it's like oh no i got all my crack i need here exactly but i think my way of doing it will be easier and beat both of your ways i go to the crack head give him some money give him half the money and i say you bring me back some crack because you know where to get crack yeah because crack heads are really reliable

that's why i said half the money yeah he'd bring back some bunk, some black market bunk. Yeah, he'd bring back pebbles from the dog park. I'd say me and you smoke it together. And then once I get high as fuck off the crack, then you get the other half the money. You better be picking a really well-behaved crackhead. Trustworthy crackhead. Those are some upstanding crackheads you're meeting. Dude, I think crackheads got to be some of the more upstanding citizens that we have because if I

prove myself... No, the salt of the earth, that's for sure. That's a good crack joke. But I think if I prove myself to be a fountain of money for this crackhead, they're not going to want to burn the bridge right away. I see what you're saying. I don't know if I agree with you. I honestly...

Dude, genuinely, I think that Francis has a better chance of locating the source of crack in New York City than you do of paying a crackhead 50% of the money and expecting to ever see him again in your entire life. Truly, I think that was one of the more dumb things you've ever said. Now I'm so pissed off that I'm going to do it. Now I'm so fucking angry at you're that you just believe this has a better chance of prying open the wooden crate filled with crack all right and you have of giving a crackhead a hundred dollars assignment hundred dollars weeks live son of a boy we'll all bring in our best i have to come in with at least like 14 gallons of untouched crack yeah or you have to have a crack head bring through and he can come to my apartment crack the crack i can the crackhead will come to my apartment also i could

just that's the thing i don't believe him because i think he just knows where to buy crack he might i think he has a drug dealer in mind he's like because i think you told me a story a while ago of your drug dealer being like i have meth or something like that yeah could you get an unserialized gun a burner i think they're called yeah no you're thinking of the phones no burner i think a burner is also a or a scrap what is it um when they scratch off the serial number what is it called is it no burner i don't, what is it called? Isn't it a burner? I don't know. 50 has that song. I got that burner on me. You're talking about a phone?

He's talking about a phone? A phone to call people without being traced. But I don't think that would be. You can buy a burner at CVS. But a burner is also a word for a gum, but I don't know if that's definitely. I don't fucking know. I don't think. We are the three kids on the couch.

Yeah, I know. I just for a second just thought about how dumb this conversation is no i think what 50 was talking about when he was referencing a burner was actually a weapon no i don't think uh i don't think 50 cent would be rapping about a phone that he could go buy at a fucking gas station well true and also he doesn't want people knowing that he has the burner because that defeats the purpose of having the burner. No, I think 50 Cent would definitely rap

about having the gun. Then he can't call his side pieces. I don't think 50 Cent was worried about his girlfriend finding out that he's cheating on her. I think that's probably the least of his worries. Let's not talk about 50 like that. Put a smut on 50. What about the ones where he liked the girl like a fat kid loves cake?

That girl. That was when he was a child, wasn't it? You know my style. I'd do anything to make you smile. Yeah. Isn't that when he was a child? Then he wrote that song. I could like you on the bus.

Yeah. That's when he's a child. He wrote that in. That's public transportation. Have you ever seen Get. Yeah, that's when he's a child. He wrote that in... Have you ever seen Get Wretched, Die Trying? Yes. He writes that song, You be my best friend. I want you around all the time.

You know I want you all the time. Yeah, he wrote that song when he was a kid. I can ask you 21 questions. No, two different songs. We're singing two different songs. We're singing two different songs. 21 questions is the name of that song is it yep the one where he's like you be my best friend i want you around all the time that that's

a different song i'm talking about the same song i could like you like a fat kid loves cake that one see i'm having a hard time understanding what song you're singing because you're clearly not singing it like fitty would well i like you on the bus. I don't do that. I take the bus with you. I take you 21 questions. I take you 21 questions. That's it. And what song is that? 21 questions. And what's the song that I'm referencing?

I don't know, man. That was weird. I think yours is Best Friend. That's the song where he's downstairs. Yeah, he's downstairs. But you say he's just a friend no whether he is or he ain't your man no that's the one you're talking about i trust roan but also 50 cent was my top artist last year but roan is 50 cent's friend roan would 50 cent would hate roan he's calling on that burner fucking roan you think he would hate me yeah he's like i need 16

bars no fifth would never need me to rap for him. 50's the best rapper of all time, easily. No, that's ridiculous. I love 50 Cent. He has great songs, but he's not the best rapper of all time. All of his songs are good. He doesn't have a bad song. But he's not the best rapper of all time, though.

Correct. But he's cool and believable. He's my favorite rapper. He's tough as fuck. Who's the best rapper of all time? I think Black Thought. Christopher Wallace? From The Roots. He's my favorite rapper. He's tough as fuck. Who's the best rapper of all time? I think Black Thought. Christopher Wallace? From The Roots.

Yeah. He's awesome. You're one of those guys? What do you mean, one of those guys? Like The Roots are the best rappers of all time? The Roots isn't all rappers. I'm talking about the one rapper from The Roots. Yeah, that's something that my friend Bo told me. Did you ever see that video where Black Thought did like 400 bars with no hook?

No. Yeah, you don't. This is 400 bars with no hook. Now. Yeah. This is like you talking about ball, basically. There's people getting pissed off at home. Actually, 50 Cent's the best rapper of all time. I changed my thought. You're one of those guys who thinks that the Roots are good rappers? I said that I think 50 Cent is my favorite rapper of all time.

There you go. I said that earlier, though. But you mean thinking that it's laughable that Black Thought's the best rapper of all time? No, I get it. Black Thought's good. Black Thought has that one song with A$AP Rocky. You didn't even know who he was. I know who Black Thought is. You didn't know that he was in The Roots. Yes, I did. I said from The Roots and then you went oh, you like The Roots guys?

I like a fucking dad. Yes, exactly. My dad listens to Black Thought. No, he doesn't. I swear to God my dad listens to Black Thought. Yes, I swear to God. And he sends me his songs. My dad doesn't know anything about rap music. And he sends me Black Thought songs, and he's like, this guy's good.

No. And then I laugh at the phone. You're doing your fucking... Well, then your dad is on point, and you've exposed yourself. I swear to God, my dad listens to Black Thought. Doesn't Black Thought have that one song with A$AP Rocky? I think you're thinking of, like, fucking A$AP Ferg. No, song with A$AP Rocky? I think you're thinking of like fucking A$AP Ferg.

No, I know A$AP Ferg. I think you're thinking of like Dirk. Yeah, someone significantly different than what I'm talking about. He's got that song with Oh, I know. It's on this album though. People say Andre 3000's one of the better ones ever.

I think he's great. Great flautist. Have you heard his flout music? I couldn't bring myself to. Yeah, Strangers. On Danger Mouse. You boys don't know shit about hip hop, do you? DJ Danger Mouse. Who did the gray album, which was like the Beatles white album

mixed with Jay-Z's The Black album and was fucking awesome. Jay-Z's up there too carter what i don't know what is so funny right now that you guys don't understand that i know i know hip-hop yeah you do bro why are you siding with him you know he doesn't know hip-hop. I know Roan knows it the most. And I think you're being a goofball. I'm not challenging Roan's opinions. I think you're just saying the whitest shit you can think of.

The whitest shit? What are you talking about? I said I like 50 Cent. You're picking paint. I said I like 50 Cent. I think he's my favorite rapper of all time. And then he said Black Thought. And I don't think Black Thought is the best rapper of all time.

Chalk. Chalk. What's Paint? Paint? Paint is what fucking. You're the one that thinks 50 Cent's rapping about like cell phones that he has. Paint are the chips that Sass has been eating to have these fucking crazy ass opinions. Did I say something like insane?

The way that you guys are acting like now is like that i said something i said like jack harlow was the greatest rapper of all time jack harlow's great what's wrong with what's wrong with missionary is it crazy to say eminem's name is that just like no no i think a lot of people would say eminem's name but they would be scared to admit it but especially white people because they're like i don't want to be the one that says eminem's the best of all time. Yeah, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't do it. But just because I, what's the chat saying?

What do you got? Chalk. People are saying that I'm a yeet guy. Jay-Z was never the GOAT. I don't know. Speaking of the controversy, this morning I woke up to about 400 subtweets. Oh, shit. People asking me about this whole

president of Harvard being asked about whether or not Harvard thought that the whole thing with Israel was considered hate speech or harassment and evading the questions.

And everyone was like, Francis, your thoughts? Like any comment as an alum? And I'm like, the questions and that everyone was like Francis, your thoughts? Any comment as an alum? I'm like, do you think I work for the University of Harvard? Do you donate? No. I don't.

Because I'm pretty certain that my kids won't get in, so what's the point? And they have enough fucking money. Yeah, that's true. They've got a lot of donors. They don't need money from the funny bone. They don't need a tie from the fucking goobies. Here's what you need to ask

for an opinion on Harvard's stance on Israel-Palestine. You need to ask the kids who I never saw at Uno's Pizzeria Karaoke Monday nights in Cambridge. Because they were busy in Lamont Library fucking studying. They would bring pillows into Lamont to sleep from 5 to 7 a.m. in the armchairs.

Those kids know about that stuff. I'm curious about Sass's opinion on all of it as a... I'm not getting into this. As a whole-ass Jew. No, you've already outed yourself by being a 50 supporter. Bro, there's a big difference between being a 50 supporter and thoughts on the conflict in the Middle East. I don't think there is. So you think it's cool for them to say it's cool to genocide Jews?

No, I don't think that. I don't want to talk about this. I don't have any thoughts on it. That's why I don't want to talk about it because I don't know want to i don't want to talk about this i don't have any thoughts on it that's why i don't want to talk about it because i don't know i don't want to talk about it here's my one thought when they were like all of our viewers no when they were like no one wants to hear about this shit no the funniest thing was when they were like and what's your opinion now it's fun now jews dying is funny who says that he said the funniest thing well can i can i don't recall laughing well the funniest thing. I don't recall laughing. The funniest thing was like, in your opinion, Dr. Gay?

The guy's name is Dr. Gay? She is a woman. A black woman named Dr. Gay. President of Harvard. Doctor? Doctor? Oh, God. You be my best friend. i want you around all the time i want you around me all see i told you there was something funny about it it's funny yeah nurse gay way funny who's the dude in the nfl whose name is gay and then he was getting covered by cocks yes that was a good one you couldn't even buy his jersey you can't buy even buy a gay jersey. You can buy any jersey. You can just customize them.

You can't customize gay. You can't just be like gay 69 for the Eagles. Can you get Cox? Yes. But COX. Not COCKS. There's some good ball this week coming up. The fraudulent Eagles play the football.

It's been really good lately. It's been good ball lately. Sunday was brutal. I don't agree. I didn't enjoy Sunday. Monday was good. Bro, the Chiefs game, was it the Chiefs game? No, the Packers-Chiefs game was nuts.

Yeah, that was a good game. Respect the ball. That was a good ball, dude. I'm excited to see the fraudulent Eagles take on the fraudulent Cowboys. Honestly, I wouldn't be mad if Israel and Palestine settled it on the gridiron. Yeah, neither would I. Went 11 on 11. Yeah, I wouldn't hate that.

Suit it up. Yeah, but little... Throw a bomb. You know what would happen is Palestine would pull an old... Remember the ice bowl? Oh, yeah. All the heating under the field froze. Oh, yeah.

It would go down under there. Yeah. Because they know their way around tunnels. Yeah, they know their way around tunnels. And they'd turn off the heating. The fucking tunnels. Interesting. Yeah, there was good ball, but that was a good way for you to try to pivot, and I brought it right back

to something you didn't want to talk about. You trying to get off the ball? I'll bring you right back to it. I don't care if we talk about Israel-Palestine. I just don't know nearly enough about it. It's a comment. Nobody wants to talk about it. But it's the fact, Francis was literally brought into the middle of it. That's my, yeah, the point I was trying to make is like, why would anyone want my fucking opinion?

Yeah, that's true. I don't know shit about fucking that or whatever Harvard's administration's policy is towards these students. Like, you know, what the fuck are you asking me? Yeah, it is hilarious. Do you think Riggs got the same treatment? Probably. I feel like you're more of a known harvard man than riggs is though i feel like harvard riggs is like a sneaky harvard guy

that may be true dave wrote a blog i did see that he said that um he's gonna have a policy from now on where they're not gonna hire any more graduates from any of those schools so harvard mit and mit until oh jesus christ where are we gonna get our talent from there yeah graduates from any of those schools. So Harvard, Penn, and MIT. Oh, Jesus Christ. Where are we going to get our talent from then? That's already 50% of the company right there. Better bunker down, boys. I guess it's just us for the foreseeable future.

We're not going to have to start hiring from Fordham, are we? Oh, no. That would be fucking terrible. A lot of people don't know that Big Ev actually went to MIT. That whole Ohio State thing. That's just because he grew up an Ohio State fan. That was a big one. He was really a quantum mechanics guy from MIT.

But his grandfather didn't. Shout out to Dave. I met a guy yesterday who was like i went to college with riggs actually and he was like he uh i was on the golf team and he drove our van oh shit who the golf the golf kids actually do drive a van i was in the van for a bit uh i i met him briefly in like an elevator i don't remember his name you know you real? No, it was in a, it was at, I was at a sports business conference yesterday. Wow. With Erica.

Cool. We were speaking, we were keynote speaking. Jesus Christ. Look at the shit he gets invited to. I know. I don't get invited to anything. See, that's the duality of man. I could buy crack in five minutes and I'm also talking at a.

Yeah. That would be a big story. That would be huge for the podcast if it turned out that like co-host of pat bev podcast secretly doing crack but if i'd have to keep it a secret if because if i was proudly doing it no one would like fake some tmz photos zoomed in from a distance coming to earth we all die tomorrow You only get to do one drug. What is it? Beer. I would just drink a bunch of beer.

That's ridiculous. I don't want. You've done beer. I know, and I love it. You need to. Let's say it has to be something you've never done. Nope. I wouldn't want it because what if it happens that what if I don't like it?

I don't want to end my life being like anxious. I mean, I'm definitely doing heroin. It's not a question. You think there's any chance that you have like a bad high on heroin though yeah you could probably get a tummy ache but you need a I don't think it matters we're dying tomorrow dying is probably a bad high

I'm not necessarily trying to go out well do you remember being a kid and like thinking about like a plane crash and being like having like these wild like sexual fantasies and being like I fucking would just like like the girl next to me i'd be like let's fuck yeah or like like i'd like make out with her or i'd like jerk off yeah i do have i had those exact same thoughts a lot of times in school too

what i would be or it would be like or or or it would be like me fantasizing like i'd probably like drive to kate uppton's house and fuck her. That was a possibility, even if the world was ending. But then I remember having this... I have such a vivid memory of being like... But there would probably be a line outside of her house to fuck her. So I probably wouldn't be able to. I'd have to find someone else.

I'd have to go to her beforehand and be like, listen, open your back door. That's how Kate Upton's last moments would be spent. Yeah, rushing to her back door.. Like, that's how Kate Upton's last moments would be spent. Yeah, like rushing to her back door like, Yeah, oh shit, there's a line outside. I guess it's time to fuck 700 different dudes. No, I do remember having those exact memories. Planes, on planes, and in school. Mostly in school.

In school, I had it all the time. I used to think, if I could freeze this whole world, freeze it with my mind and everyone was frozen and then I could tap one person to unfreeze them and we would be unfrozen for like 10 minutes and that person would want to

have sex with me theoretically in front of everybody in this theory they can't see even though they're frozen but we're doing it in front of them it's theory they can't see even though they're because they're frozen it's a dark thought in front of them it's a dark thought to have but most likely in this theory who am i picking yeah i would have this thought constantly as a child so often i would rank it's very optimistic yeah yes i would do the same thing all right if she's not unfrozen then it's her then it's her

and then maybe him if we're honest but the possibility of the girl being like absolutely not never was a thought i just assumed that she would be like yes let's fuck right now we have to we have to i talked about this on uh when there's an almost 100 chance she would be like absolutely not freeze me refreeze me kill him kill that guy unfreeze everyone i'm telling them what you said i'm gonna tell everyone what you said first person to get canceled is middle school boy i talked about this on matt and shane's uh like what the live show that we did but i used to when i was in church i would like oh that's bad i would like fantasize but i would like rationalize it in my head and I

was like if a gunman came in here that's usually what the thought was and was like and was like you have to pick who like you're who you're gonna fuck like who would it okay continue sorry Jesus Christ are we in trouble no I can't say the rest no say the rest no i thought that's basically that we were having a good rip about it being at gunpoint that i was so i i would like absolve myself mentally yeah it's but you don't think about how hard it would be to get a boner in the scenario where you're in front of it usually when i was having this thought i already already had a boner. You're pressing it up against the pew. Hiding it below the desk in fucking social studies.

Does anybody here have a boner right now? Let's just make this easier. I think in eighth grade, there's a chance that like 30% of the boys in the class had a boner actively at all times. God forbid one of those girls was leaning forward in the desk and a thong popped out that would never happen usually this was in like eighth grade girls were wearing thongs in eighth grade yeah ones that had bleak futures i remember i was in like sixth or seventh grade when the thong song came out and thong song you don't know the thong song i knew you were in a hip-hop head bro expose let me see your booty go let me see your body go i was never a big like whale tail guy oh really no i was never like the i know like the old super bad me like clip of fucking mclovin

walking behind the girl with the whale tail just humongous swatches of fabric. No, I just never really comprehended. It was never something that I would think about. You liked girls where you could see the sort of like jockstrap. Yeah, like the under cheek line. No, I think at a certain point an ass is an ass. Like if it's a good ass, it's a good ass. And so you don't want to see it. You're not going to be like, oh, she doesn't have a thong on.

Gross. That's not what I'm saying. I'm not disqualifying girls that had more underwear. I just thought if you saw a thong peeking out, it made you think, whoa, that girl's up for some freakier stuff than the girl wearing the Fruit of the Looms. What's unsettling is that at that age like you know that they're like mom had to buy that for them yeah that's creepy it's super creepy and weird yeah at the time it was awesome but it's like the girl in the thong who when you freeze everybody in the room is much more likely when you tap her and be like listen i know this is weird yeah but i saw that you were

wearing a thong so i unfroze you, and we have ten minutes. We have ten minutes until everyone else is unfrozen. Yeah. The sick and perverted minds of the young boy. The young boy was a... The sticky young boy. Yeah. Nasty work that the boys are getting into.

I remember looking at the clock, being like, oh shit, I gotta go to lunch in three minutes. I have to get... Somehow, this boner has to go away in the in three minutes i have to get somehow this boner has to go away in the next three minutes or else i'm gonna stand up in these sweatpants and everyone is gonna see my penis yep i had some times where i would be like everyone would go to lunch and i would be sitting there like just like writing my name down being like i'm still working i got to fucking i gotta take a minute i'm still thinking i'm actually studying harder oh lunch oh it's lunchtime i didn't even notice i'm so caught up in the work. I'm going to skip lunch today. I had a big breakfast.

It's not that 80% of my blood flow is inside of my penis right now. spray urine wherever they want but for god to put like sexual hormones into like 11 year olds is vile and abominable work by our lord and savior the fact that he's like oh you'll have full reproductive capabilities 11 years old yeah like probably 15 years before you should be a father yeah yeah it's such dirty work yeah that's dirty that's dirty yeah oh man the the horniness then was it was just it consumed your entire life right i remember being in class being like just in my head being like this is the first thing i do when i get home is i'm gonna fucking jerk off right when i walk through the doors and then i would just get up and be like all right time to go to fucking uh math class i'd go to i'd

go home time to go to english i would go shoot pythagoras theorem and i would tell myself if i make 10 three-pointers in a row then that girl's gonna fuck me yeah i thought you're gonna say that you can then jerk off jerk off yeah that's why you're such a good athlete now if i can dunk i'll be able to jerk off no i i would do i would do some version of like these crazy stakes in my head like if i make this if i if i make this shot then my family won't die young yeah yeah it's all i'd miss and i'd be like i just killed every member of my family i watched i went to the movies last night. I saw this movie called The Holdovers. Do you know it?

With Paul Giamatti. Yeah. It looks great. It's about the boarding school. It was so good. It looked awesome. But I kept thinking about... You didn't go to a boarding school, did you?

No. I was like... I did keep on thinking about whether you had a similar experience. It was like a New England prep school kind of vibe. I went and toured a bunch of them. Did you? Yeah. What was your thoughts of maybe going to one were you excited about it was your family excited about it do you feel like you're being stashed away or were it was like

a cool prospect um it was so different from what i had i mean i grew up in like main kind of small towns like went to public school and i just i remember going to these campuses like phillips andover and phillips exeter and being like these places are fucking hogwarts yeah i couldn't understand like the science center the dining hall yeah the fucking field house which would have like 15 basketball courts and you're like what yeah how is this possible like where and then there's like kids from like jordan and fucking yeah korea and shit all the world like you're just like jesus christ i feel like everyone that went to boarding school it was too much for me. I was overwhelmed and I didn't want that. Your parents were probably like, fuck.

Yeah, I would get homesick. Like hoping that you'd fall in love with it. I think they were pumped that I didn't want to go away. Really? It's a whole other college tuition. All that and they would... That's four years that you don't get to spend with your kids. Yeah.

I guess that depends on your opinion of your kids. I feel like a lot of people that went to boarding school ended up just getting really into like smoking weed at a young age and drinking because there's no i mean there's no rules that's like there's rule i mean but there's rules there's rules the same way there's rules in a college dorm in this movie it seems it's like if you get caught once yeah drinking you're toast yeah but that but that happened to – I know a lot of kids that that happened to. They got in a bunch of trouble. But it didn't stop them. Did you go to a boarding school?

No, but I know people that did. A kid I used to tutor who's an awesome kid and like a really, really good dude went to a very, very elite boarding school. boarding school. I think he was head of the class, class president his senior year, super popular kid, going to a very good college. On the night before

graduation, he got caught drinking and expelled. Damn. I'm talking 12 hours before he walks across the stage after four years to receive his diploma. Damn. Kicked him out.

Yeah, that's nuts. That sucks so bad. That's such bullshit. How crazy is that? That used to happen. Dude, kids getting caught drinking in high school used to be the biggest. There were kids that lost scholarships because they got caught drinking at a party. I got caught smoking weed my junior year, it didn't like get back to the school.

The police found us. But we came, I was with two buddies and we like we were on the soccer team and two of them came forward and confessed because their parents made them. Oh, that's so stupid. I was getting recruited for soccer. So my parents were like, we're not going to,

we don't want you to tell. We'll punish you ourselves. But let's not ruin your future. Your French parents are idiots. Yeah, that's just so dumb. And we didn't even get to confer together about what our game plan was. The next morning, we had the practice

and the kids were like... I saw them in the parking lot and I was like, so what's up? And they were like, our parents are making us parking lot. I was like, so what's up? And they were like, our parents are making us confess. And I was like, oh my God. Well, that's not really what my parents wanted to do. Yeah. And then they were like, don't worry. We're not going to name you.

And I was like, oh shit. So then they went down and they told the coach that three players on the team the night before had been caught smoking weed by the police two came forward two and two of them came forward and then our coach made us run suicides until the third person confessed did you confess of course oh really i wasn't gonna fucking sit there puking and like making him think i mean we didn't even run like i was like wait what of course it's me so do you get in trouble yeah we get we had like a we had to sign like an honor code thing a contract for extracurriculars where if you got caught by the school you would get suspended from your sports team for three weeks of games.

But if you came forward and confessed, it was only two weeks. Okay. And so we came forward, we confessed. Why did I tell this? We're talking boarding schools. Yeah. We were saying that if you got in trouble or not. Yeah, that was the thing.

But you didn't lose scholarships or anything? Oh, good question okay so then um you know it wasn't that big of a deal we just fucking did our time and then went back and it was like it kind of sucked i mean it fucked up my chances of being recruited for soccer but um a parent in the town when i got into harvard wrote a letter to harvard to tell them about what had happened to me because they were mad that like their kid didn't that's insane people are such losers it's insane dude parents are fucking coach my lacrosse coach at harvard found out about it was like the admissions committee didn't care but like what the fuck is going on that's nuts how petty is that yeah that's crazy that would make me have a massive chip on my

shoulder actually that would probably shove me down the dylan klebold fucking path that would make me go mass shooter for real that would do that would that would be like if that like affected my outcome of life if i like got kicked off of something or didn't get into something i would be so furious and there's nothing stupider than a fucking honor code yeah honor code sucks so much fucking dick it's so dumb to be like yeah you're just like we're all going to be really good boys and like just trust each other because no one's actually following that and it can only ever hurt people it's only set in place to like hurt people in like this false sense of piety which is like counterintuitive to being a good person like in general it's just like oh i'm better than everybody because i follow the honor code like that's fucking there's a sin in and of that. Fuck the honor code. Fuck the honor code.

Fuck the honor code. That's crazy, dude. It made me very suspicious. Of like who did it? I just couldn't stop thinking about who it was. We should have them honor code. We should make your town run suicides until whoever that is comes forward and says who the fuck they are. Because probably some fucking lying ass mom that will never come forward you at least had enough honor to come forward and be like hey it was me we don't have to run anymore she did this anonymously yeah how is she better than you

did you not she didn't get exactly and that was why she was bitter did you ever figure out who i don't even know if the kid applied i just know that it was a parent who was like you know they thought they thought because i was recruited that like the high school had gotten behind my candidacy and that i was one of you're letting this junkie into harvard yeah like why is why is he getting favorable admissions treatment from my kid and um wrote a letter yeah i i'm man that's pretty low i don't know i just thought that was really that's crazy yeah dude i mean did you did you ever figure out who it was well there's a reason i don't keep up with like any of my high school friends yeah i i don't keep up with any kids that i grew up i keep up with like my good friends but dude like going home

it's still like the same exact culture of like parents who are like fucking crazy and it's we have like facebook groups now like dedicated to the town and like the police have had to get involved it's crazy they've been like they've been like following like children and being like i saw this kid speeding down harrison street bingo yeah we uh we hit 100k oh yeah i know i thought happened. We'll have to get our plaque. Big props to Roan and Sass. We'll divvy up the crack cocaine on the plaque that we get. You guys got that 99.9% of the way there? No, no.

99.1% of the way there. We were also, I mean, to be honest, we were probably at, what, 97,000 for the last two years? Yeah. Oh, yeah. So this is what it took to get the final push let's go it could also recede back like this isn't like we're not like enough over that we were like 100 good people could be assholes about it purposefully but so we'll have to apply to that plaque now well we need that plaque how does it work how does it work do we apply do they just send it

to you automatically email them or something yeah i'm sure our youtube yeah i'm sure they'll fucking be willing to help us. I'm sure they'll bend over backwards to look out for us. You'll do the paperwork and then some parent from Maine will message them and be like, are you sure you want to give them this 100k plaque? He'll probably just roll up the paper and smoke it. I'm sure you didn't know

that one of these boys smoked weed as a youth. I'm not sure if you're aware he stands with Harvard's policy on Gaza. It depends on the circumstances if genocide's okay. Fucking A, man. Unbelievable shit. I can't believe it. I thought we'd never get there.

I knew we would. That first 100K is the hardest. That's what Beastall says. 200K is going to be fast. 200K is going to be like... We'll get to 200K by the end of the year. No, the end. That's what Beastall says. 200K is going to be fast. 200K is going to be like fucking... We'll get to 200K by the end of the year. No, the end of the year is like next week. By the end of next year. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I made a suggestion to you today. You didn't respond. About fishing? Yeah. And recording a podcast? There's another comedian who does that. Just because there's another comedian who does it doesn't mean you can't do it. But it's a pretty out there idea to be doing the exact same idea.

I never heard of this person. David Lucas? I completely independently thought of that. David Lucas fishes and does podcasts. Yeah, he does like a fishing podcast. But I completely independently thought of it. Sorry, bro. I've completely independently thought of jokes.

Then people have been like, that's someone else's joke. Okay, well that proves that you didn't steal the joke. Yeah, I know. But I'm just saying. So why are you taking their side? There's not a lot of that you didn't steal the joke. Yeah, I know. But I'm just saying. So why are you taking their side, fucking whistleblower? I'm not, I'm just saying. Well, people will be like, someone else already does this. Well, why don't we do it fucking, let's put our original twist on it and do it ass naked or something.

That and I would imagine David Lucas isn't fly fishing. He's probably He's not. He's spin rodding. Spinning. Yeah. And we could go into a waders and into a old river would be pretty hard to pull off i don't know if i have the capabilities of rivers tend to be a little noisy being in a river yeah all holding microphones while fishing if we think the leaf blower is loud think of a rushing river think of rapids

oh man i was thinking about going fishing tomorrow i wish i had a car because i can't because i'm not my car nah not worth it i'm around tomorrow brother you don't have the equipment what do you mean the equipment i have a car yeah but you don't have the you don't have the equipment to go fly fishing okay that's on you you'd be borrowing my car i didn't say do you want to rent out a fucking Bass Pro Shop for me? You said I'm around tomorrow, implying that you were going to come. No, I'm saying I'm around to give you a car. Me and Francis have a video series we're doing.

Oh, really? Oh, yeah. KB and Nick are coming to town? Yep. That's fun. Game night. We're putting the gay in game night. Truth.

Are you guys going to play that new barstool game? We are. That's fun. It's going to be awesome. It's going to be freaking other freaking also known as monopoly it's gonna be fucking awesome i think it is a little different it is and it's gonna be fun as fuck that's gonna be fun looks like a fun game i'm excited to see that super fun i'm excited to watch that i walked into cvs pharmacy yesterday to get COVID test. And I had the game under my arm, page views.

And I put the game on the counter as I bought a COVID test. And the woman goes, what's that? And I was like, oh, it's this board game. She goes, can I play? And I was like, what do you mean? Like at some point or with me? And she's like, yeah, now point or with me and she's like yeah let's play and i'm like don't you see what i'm buying she's trying to hit on you and you have like covid test listen to my voice like it was negative by the way otherwise i wouldn't be here but supposedly she's clearly

trying to raise you up though she's clearly trying to like yeah that was like she must hate her job yeah be like i'll play the six hour game right now and then her boss comes by her manager comes by and she's like he made me do it yeah he made this guy the customer gets what the customer wants i love a good board game same they're very fun well we'll get you involved if you want to come do one of these with us yeah i would definitely do one okay great yeah i like monopoly a lot i don't think we'll do that because it's too long it's pretty similar to this game we're playing i'll play page views as well we like playing games that require uh thought and isn't

risk risk is a thought but i'm not talking strategy isn't risk like a fucking two-day game risk takes like fucking that's the kind of games that i like yeah we're trying to make a nice video yeah the video has to be like half an hour we should have said we should have set something that we were going to do when we hit 100k. I said, go fishing. You didn't say when we hit 100k. A guy has gone fishing before, so now we're completely absorbed from being able to do it.

The crack hunt is a good idea. It is a little risky. We're going to have to head on over to kick for that. We're going to have to do it on rumble. Not exactly. Well, Elon would have have us francis now show your crack ron you're to bring a crack head yourself yeah all right bring him in patiently sitting in like a waiting room get one of those antiques roadshow assessors so tell me again when you got this crack and you

have the documents to prove this yeah i saw a video yesterday of some like veteran who brought in a rolex that he got like you see that that one's one of the best ones and he falls over and he falls over do you think it's real absolutely that's why does he look like he's wearing a fucking disguise because those are the types of people that go to Antiques Roadshow. Yeah, that's true. Fucking tapings, dude. No part of his beard or hair looks real. Not a single part of it.

Well, what's so crazy is that he had the foresight to keep all the papers, never touch the watch, and put it in a safety deposit box for fucking decades. Yeah. We should do a christmas we should do a christmas episode as well you just don't think a guy like that who probably wasn't that wealthy could be like man i'm going through tough times yeah my daughter need my daughter needs a blood transfusion but i'm not touching that fucking rolex that thing's got at least another 20 years sitting there i need to let that baby sit on ice what kind of christmas episode are you thinking i don't know because i don't drink anymore so i'm not really that fun no yeah i definitely am picking up that vibe um because i feel like a christmas episode entails drinking

what about just like eggnog like just like a lot of like eggy milk like like non-alcoholic eggnog i love eggnog yeah i grew up like for when we would set up the christmas tree we would just drink eggnog bloated how many cups can you drink like a half a cup let's do it we made you drink a whole quart of eggnog well i don't want to i don't want to go into that territory of being in pain while we're recording me and francis could drink the eggnog with the booze in it and you could just fucking sit your square ass in the corner yeah i would do that or do you want we could do it at either his or my apartment too if you want like an actual christmas tree there instead of uh fun i feel like the the aesthetic of a christmas episode is willing to drop that fucking bag and upgrade your wi-fi for sure wait how do we need

live it doesn't have to be alive true it doesn't have to be alive true it doesn't have to be alive so it's not monday anywhere that's what i mean we could do it well so a rushing river is a rushing river yeah but dude we can't be carrying the zoom recorder and microphones with with 15 foot cables in rushing water so we'll run them up our fucking waiters that's actually not a bad idea i guess if we got two more pod record or zoom recorders we could all we could record the audio simultaneously and then i could layer it and put it all over each other or we could like get mics from barstool sports the company we work at and have someone put mics on us like lavs yeah that's failed us every single time we've tried every single time we've tried

to record with lav microphones it's come out and it's been like we're talking from fucking back here and there's an air conditioner there's an air conditioning unit that's 10 miles away that's somehow being picked up clear as day maybe we could run like a fucking a goodwill drive um like a salvation army drive for a sound guy or something like that. Yeah, that's true. We like put our money together and, or just steal from the Salvation Army bucket and get a sound guy. Yeah. It's not a bad idea.

Yeah. We'll plan something out. We'll definitely do a Christmas episode. I would actually like to. Yeah, me too. We could do it. I guess we can't do it next week. So we'd have to do it the week.

I really also, I really want to travel and like bank a bunch of episodes yeah i'm down i want to go to a different place you should have just gone to the fucking bahamas with him i know rent the airbnb and just say that oh it's okay okay i'll just like knock out a bunch of episodes yeah i get an airbnb do it for work yeah just do like two weeks of episodes. Just crush an episode every day or something. Like go somewhere cool and like go on different adventures. I would. Maybe you should come

to Denver with us. Maybe we should go to Denver like for like a week early. I'd like that. Yeah. When is this? That is in what? February 11th. Yeah. 9th to the 11th. Me and Francis got a bunch of dates coming up. Isn't that right by this? Isn't that when the Super Bowl is? Probably.

I think it's probably a week after the Super Bowl. I think it's Super Bowl week. That might be Super Bowl week. Doesn't really matter. I'm not involved in that. Che texted me the other day and he was like, your kicker got hurt or something. He's like, who do you want to trade for? And I was like, dude, I'm not. I was like he was like uh your your kicker got hurt or something he's like who do you want to trade for and i was like dude i'm not i was like even if i lose you guys i'm not being

invited to the super bowl i'm not driving to fucking vegas with frank the tank yeah i wasn't invited to the super bowl last year when i was on the show yeah you're not going to be fucking subjected to a punishment that you're not involved with hey we know you haven't been on the show for about a year, but we have a bag of shit that we need you to eat. It's part of the show. We have Denver, Comedy Works, me and Sass. Yeah, it's going to be a big

one. February 9th to the 11th. Maybe it's the 8th to the 11th. No, it's 9th and 10th. Albany the next weekend. That's February 16th to the 11th. No, it's 9th and 10th. Then Albany the week after. Albany the next weekend. That's February 16th and 17th. And then we're at Comedy on State in Madison, Wisconsin. And that's March 7th to the 9th.

That Comedy on State and Denver Comedy Works are supposed to be the two best clubs in the country. We're pumped. We're hyped. We're very excited for those. So why don't we do it before or after one of these? So you wouldn't be able to go down to Denver for like a week before? Because that would be fun as hell. We could go to like Boulder.

Wow, that would be cool. We should do that regardless, honestly. Just have to see if it can pass Muster. Who's Muster? Colonel Muster. No, Muster was the third book that Homer wrote. Oh, okay. Interesting.

Muster. All right. Well, I'm going to be in Louisville this weekend. I'm in Providence. Yes. So buy tickets for that. Little Sasquatch website.com. So try and decipher those websites.

Since they were laid over perfectly. But you get the gist. I'm going to be in New York. And Rowan's going to be in New York, so make sure you stop by Brooklyn. Check out his pad. Alright, you guys. Thank you for tuning in.

I think we have a lot of people watching this right now. We do. Yeah, 1,300. Wow. Shout out. Shout out to the gang. Shout out to everyone watching.

Thank you for getting us to 100,000. We will see you guys on Monday. Goodbye. Thank you. Just watching TV, brother. We gotta wait like 10 seconds to end this. Hollywood House. House. House.

House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House.

House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House.

House. House.