Son of a Boy Dad - Billy Elliot | Son of a Boy Dad #293

Episode Date: April 17, 2025

Billy Elliot | Son of a Boy Dad #293 -- #Ad:Go to https://vuori.com/BOYDAD for 20% off your first purchase. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. -- #Ad: Get started at https://factormeals.com/son50off and use code son50off to get 50 percent off plus FREE shipping on your first box. -- #Ad: GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, [phone] or visit gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit ccpg.org (CT), or visit www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos. Ends 5/18/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. -- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

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bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance for additional terms and responsible gaming resources see dkng.co slash audio. I'm just trying to figure out my fucking passport shit. You still don't have it. It's a nightmare. I have a similar nightmare. I'll tell you about. Okay, I don't know if I can talk about this on the podcast though Cuz that's it. There's probably like a 70 30 chance that I'm not going to Edmonton

Holy shit, yeah Luckily on the bright side for that I think there's about nine tickets sold Yeah, I Need my side needed to get my birth certificate too. You don't know what about a social security card? It doesn't matter. That wouldn't work? No. Come on. I have a real ID. You can't even use that. Yeah, of course not. That makes sense. No, it doesn't. All righty. Welcome back to the Son of a Boy Dad podcast. The real ID doesn't mean anything. Oh, you're going back to thought we were cutting that out.

You want to continue? You want to keep cutting stuff from the podcast? King cuts over here. I'm not King cuts. It's April 16th. It's two twenty five p.m. Yeah, I did the stream yesterday and and all the people were like, all the comments

were just like, you totally fuck your neighbor. And I just had to be like, guys, that's not even close to what I was like, he was literally just I didn't feel like talking about someone who I barely know on a big podcast. That's true. That was the entire reasoning. But what made it funny was that I held hairballs feet to the fire about whether or not she was attractive And he just was so he's such a gentleman that he would not answer that question And it got real squirrely, which is what made it funny. That is that's literally the entire thing. Yeah, it got squirrely. Yeah So no big no big surprise People really hoping for something.

People were hoping that it was gonna be like, yeah, and then I scooped her up off the ground and we ran off into the sunset together. No, the reality was I just went back into my room and played video games. Nice. Yeah. I could have guessed. Yeah.

Which is something that's, did you watch Black Mirror? No, but everyone's talking about it. Did it just come out? The new season just came out. Did you watch it, Owen? No? I didn't love it. And I, and I, and I've liked the other seasons a lot.

How many episodes are there per season? Like six or seven, I want to say. And you watch all of them? Yeah, you can skip around because they're all, it's pretty much like they're all like a short movie. I know. I've watched a few episodes and not for nothing. I do, I admire the show.

The early, like the first couple seasons are really good. This season kind of felt like, like someone just threw in a prompt to like chat chibiti and they were like, make the strangest show you can. Like it was like it's all like a like a metaphor for like shit in the real world, but it's like futuristic. But it was kind of like this season's just like silly. Like the whole thing is like the first episode the girl gets a she used to get brain surgery and they have like this new futuristic brain implant they can put in your brain that's like a connects to satellites and stuff and does those things that that part of your brain is missing and it'll do it electronically.

But then it's like you have to pay for a package and then you can only go within a certain range and then it's like you're like, okay, this is kind of interesting. Like it's kind of showing like, you know, like cellular cellular data and all this shit And then it's all the sudden all the sudden she's reading ads Like just in her day-to-day life and then they go back to the place and she's like they're like, oh, yeah You you're now on the standard package. You have to upgrade to plus if you want to remove ads so she's a teacher and then the middle of her class, she'll just be like, Red Bull gives you wings. Like just out of nowhere, just we'll do a full ad read

for a random company. Boy, can't imagine that, listening to someone talk for an hour and have an ad. Well, I think that's the point. But it's like, what are we talking about? It's like, that's never gonna happen. What? It was, yeah, they added product placement in that. Oh, really?

I don't remember that. But yeah, it was stupid. And then there's a whole thing where like the, her boyfriend, this is where it comes back to the streaming thing. Her boyfriend or her husband has to like pay for this package to like keep her alive. And he starts streaming and he's just like drinking piss. It's like he has like a bottle of piss and it's like if we get to a hundred donations, I'll drink the piss and then it gets to it and then it like leaks and like his call of his co-workers find out and shit This is your generation you did this and I was like that then I'm like I'm like well

I still I just started streaming and others the first thing I'm seeing is this dude drinking piss. I could see you drinking piss. To raise money. I kinda just made me feel weird though. Yeah, that's right. It kinda made me like, I've been enjoying the streaming, but like something about like when you end the stream and then you're on the Twitch homepage

and you see everyone else streaming and you're like, this is kinda dark. Like I kinda feel like a cam girl right now Like locked in a fucking because it's like even different than like what MOOC does because MOOCs is more of a show Than it is streaming Me it's just like I'm just talking alone in my room Yeah, it's uncomfortable and then you like and then it ends and then you just you see like the girls with like the cat ears and shit Uh-huh, and you're like, this is freaks. I'm on the freak website now

Is that the weird is that where people do the yum yum ice cream? I think that's on tik-tok, isn't it? But are those streamers? Yeah, technically I Think twitch is mostly like gaming streaming. Yeah. But yeah, it was a little bit- How do you think all this ends? I don't know. How does it keep ramping? And what is the outcome?

Dude, I've kind of been going through a little bit of an existential crisis with the entire thing because it's like You want to do comedy, right? That's what you want to do. You want to like you enjoy stand-up comedy or at least I guess maybe that's me Well, why wouldn't you? Because you're not responding to what I'm saying. To be honest with you, I thought you were talking about yourself No, I just meant like both of us. You as in one wants to do stand up, but one cannot. I meant both of us. I thought it was the sort of like royal you. No, no, no.

I really did. No, that's not what I meant. But I mean- You in life, in one's life, one wants to do, I didn't know you were talking to me. No, I was using you as an example. Sure, yeah. Or I guess it could apply to both of us.

The reason I didn't catch that is because I've never done any streaming. Yeah, I know. So I didn't think that you, I thought the natural, whatever, please continue. That confused me. My bad. Yeah, my bad. My apologies.

My apologies. No, that's okay. But, uh. You better. What I was going to say was like, my, what I want to do is I want to do standup comedy. That's like the big thing that I care about. Right. Right? But it's like, now it's like, you gotta do, you can't just be, you can't just get good at comedy

and be good at comedy. You gotta do a million other things. And then it's like, then it started with like the clips, everyone started posting the clips. And then it's like, oh, clips aren't even enough anymore. Even if you have standup clips that are doing well, that's still not enough. You gotta do something else now on top of that.

So then it's like, we do the podcast, which I love doing the podcast, that's easy. But now it's like, now I feel like I need another thing. Yeah, okay, so I have two thoughts on this. My first thought, my first answer to that is that I think that the age old adage of be undeniable still pertains, meaning, Like if you get good enough at stand up. If you were good enough, still pertains, meaning, you know.

Like if you get good enough at stand up. If you were good enough, then even without streaming on Twitch or posting crowd work clips or doing this and that, people would find you. Do you know what I mean? I agree with that to an extent. So I think at that point, if you're that good, then those other things are just additional income streams. Yeah.

And then it just becomes a question of how much money do you wanna make, right? Or perhaps they accelerate your visibility and provide other inroads for people to find you. And they'll through your Twitch, find your standup, come to your shows, help you get better. All of that.

Yeah, that's the goal. Right. For everything. I also think that the bottom line is, when you talk about adding things, right, you say, well, I do standup, I do the podcast, which you like, and now you feel like you need to add another thing.

It's still not that much. much. You know what I mean? It's just not that much work. Yeah. No, I agree. I totally agree. If you were to say, okay, let's flip this into a different illustration, which is a single mother has a son who is a prodigy at hockey, I guess, and she has to afford skate sharpening and new sticks because he keeps breaking them because he's got a temper problem. And therefore he needs sports psychology sessions as well and needs to travel and all of these things and create game films so he can be recruited and join juniors and all that. So she takes on night shifts. Yeah. In addition, and that's still not enough. That woman, you're like, yeah, that's hard. Yeah, that's tough. That's tough. You're doing a

lot. I mean, yeah, in the grand scheme of things. We're not doing a lot. Yeah, Ron always says that. He says that our job is the, we have the easiest job in the world. And he's right. There's so much more fundamentally we could add. I thought I was at my breaking point last year. Yeah. When I was just doing the most I've ever done professionally.

But if someone had been like, hey man, if you're willing to wake up two hours earlier in the morning and do a daily stream of yourself making breakfast and walking us through it, and we'll pay you an additional $25,000 a week, I would have been like, oh, I can do that. Do you know what I mean? No, I get it.

It just becomes a time value calculus where you have to say to yourself, well, is it worth it for me to keep adding these things? Do I believe that that is an investment in my career? How much do I value having my own time to play video games and blow off steam and decompress and the value that brings to my stand-up career?

If all of this is to feed the goal of winnowing your career down to just stand up and being able to make the most money you can from that, is that kind of what you're saying? Yes, exactly what I'm saying. Yes, but again, keep in mind, if Louis is our example, which I think he's the most clear cut stand up comedian. He created a brilliant show that was an extension

of his voice in that, and I think was something he believed in. He also, to get there, wrote on the Dana Carvey show. He wrote and directed, I think, Pootie Tang. He did. There were a lot of things he did that he was probably like, what the fuck am I doing this for? But he had daughters and a wife and,

eventually it took many, many years, but he got to a point where, yeah, he can just turn down Twitch streaming in order to do his standup. Yeah, I get that. I guess I just feel like I'm not. He's the best. Comedian of all time.

Probably, like one of them, right? So if he had to do that, then why the fuck wouldn't we? Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, you're definitely right. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not saying it in like, like I get it, I get it, it's obviously still easy.

I'm not even saying that it's easy. I'm just saying that one more thing. Yeah, it's not the end of the world. We're not adding the graveyard shift at 7-Eleven so that our son can play junior hockey. So that Billy Elliot can go to the fancy dance school. We're not selling our dead wife's jewelry and turning scab on the mining strike. Yeah. Fuck you, Maggie That jewelry. Yeah. And you know, turning scab on the mining strike.

Yeah. Fuck you, Maggie Thatcher. Yeah. Do you know what I'm talking about? Not at all. Never saw Billy Elliot? No. Come on.

I never saw it. Oh, it's one of the greats. Really? Yes. You will always recommend movies that I've never heard of. Buddy, Billy Elliot was a seminal movie of my childhood. I'll check it out. You're gonna love it.

I'll check it out. Can I give you the premise? Sure. A boy. A boy. Billy. Elliot. That's right.

It grows up in, I think he's in Ireland? It's gotta be Ireland, yeah. Or Northern England maybe? You're looking at us like we know. We know what you're talking about. I think it's Ireland. And his dad is a coal miner and he lives in a very poor coal mining town.

And he starts streaming on Twitch. No, he's just this, he loves to dance. He's a dancer. Oh, okay. And his dad wants him to be a boxer. Similar. Tough boy. Kinda similar, you know?

What do you mean? You can use your dancing skills in the ring. Oh, I see what you mean. Yeah. I thought you meant boxing, wanting to be a boxer would be similar to like, I guess your parents wanting you to be something and you wanting to be a comedian. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, not at all.

Not at all the case. We're not quite on the same wavelength today. But we're getting closer. So it's during the strikes, the coal miners were striking and trying to earn higher wages. Margaret Thatcher, the higher lady. I'm familiar. Prime Minister of England,

famously told all the coal miner unions, fuck off. We are not going to bend to your will. And she, I think they all went back to work after a while because they needed their wages. But it was a very dark time and these mining towns were destitute. And Billy in that darkness discovered how his love for dance

and ballet specifically and his dad it was very you don't do that in our town you don't be a fruitcake yeah no I agree with that Pufter yeah is what they call them yeah I'd be like could you at least get into like break dancing or something cool like that? Sure. Wear one of the masks, you know, Jabberwockies. Jabberwockies. Yeah. So then the dad in a moment of realizing

he has to support his son, cause his son, he walks in on his son dancing. Tough. But. I gotta watch this movie. It sounds phenomenal. His son is so good that in a moment of defiance in one of the great scenes of the movie, he starts dancing,

cause he's like, come on, Billy, we're going. We're going out of here. And Billy says, no. And he starts dancing in his face. And it's really amazing. And the dad's getting redder and red dancing in his face. And it's really amazing. And the dad's getting redder and redder in the face. You know how those people get very red in the face?

Yeah. But what he realizes is that his son's actually a prodigy. Yeah. And in order to help him go audition for the school, he sells his dead wife's jewelry at a pawn shop. And it's really sad. Why do they need to do that to audition at the school, he sells his dead wife's jewelry at a pawn shop. And it's really sad. Why do they need to do that to audition at the school?

Because there's probably an entry fee, he's got to send them on a bus, all these things. And they adapted a musical from this. I could definitely see that. It was on the West End in London. I saw it on the West End in London. I think it might have come to Broadway. Did you go to London strictly to see it?

No, I would never do something like that. Well, you said the movie was like shaped your childhood. Yeah, I'm not going to travel across the Atlantic to go see a musical. I mean, if you have that deep of connection to this movie, I would go to London to see it. Really? If they made like Good Will Hunting a play, I'd consider flying to see it. You'd go see it in London?

I'd consider it. Have it. You'd go see it in London? I'd consider it. Have you been to England? Yeah. Really? Yeah. When did you go? When I was 13. What'd you go for?

I just went with my mom. That's fun. Yeah, for a couple days. When it's all wicked. Oh my God. Yeah. That's why you're saying this. You have traveled to London for a musical.

Well, we didn't go for the musical. It sounds like you did. I don't know. Because you suggesting that seemed insane to me. Really? But it's because it's- Just hopping across the pond to go see Billy Elliot live. When we live close to Broadway.

Yeah, but it hadn't come to Broadway yet. And yet it certainly was going to. Did it? Of course. It was on Broadway for 20 years. It's the highest-grossing musical in the world. See, we're still, we're not on the same page at all. I'm still talking Billy Elliot and you're talking Wicked. I see.

We're having two separate conversations right now. Did you think he had switched back to Wicked? To Billy Elliot? Yeah. Smart. I feel like I'm in an episode of Black Mirror. Billy Elliot did come, I did come to Broadway. He came to Broadway.

Yeah. Eventually. Yeah. Eventually. Yeah. And you saw it? Yeah, yeah. There were three main boys that played the title role. And that's because when you're a lead actor in a child in a musical like that,

you gotta go to school. Yeah. So they can't let one kid play it the whole time. That makes sense. Because he would fall way behind. Yeah. And so they rotate them. But there's usually one boy who's better than the others. Yeah, of course. And you want to see it with that boy. Yeah, that's Friday night. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. You get the B team on Wednesday and Tuesday.

You're not wrong. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. Well, anyways, you were saying, the whole thing that sparked the entire conversation was you were saying, how does it end with the content stuff? Can I ask one more question? Of course.

Before we go back to that. Yeah. What else did you and your mom go to London for? That was, literally, it was me, my mom, and and my older sister and we went and we got tea one day and then we like Walked around one day and then we saw the play. I was very young. I don't really remember it that well 13 Yeah, I mean, I don't remember like every moment. It's not that long ago for you It's over ten years ago, and I was a child Yeah, be it'd be 22 years ago for me.

Well, I mean, I told you we went and saw Wicked. I know. So I guess my question is, it seems to me... There was no... That could have been the reason that we went. It seems like it. I have no idea what the reason was though. And that... But I have a feeling that's not the main reason we went. But let me say that it's starting to shape up that way. It's starting to feel like the reason you guys went to London was to see Wicked. My mom's like obsessed with London

and the royal family and shit. No, no, no, no, no, she's obsessed with Wicked. No, no, no, I promise you she isn't. Your whole family was. No. You did. If our whole family was, then my whole family would have gone. Well, your dad was like, fuck that, it's probably coming to Broadway. Yeah, true, family was. No. You did. If our whole family was, then my whole family would have gone. Well, your dad was like, fuck that.

It's probably coming to Broadway. Yeah, true. He was. And he was right. I think it was already on Broadway. Oh man. No way. I think this was the thing where we were like,

my mom wanted to go to London. She was like, I'm gonna go with me and my older sister. And then, you know, you book things to do when you're there. And one of the things that we did was go see Wicked. I think she bought the tickets to the play before she bought the flights. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don't you feel I feel like it's shaping up that way. I mean, it could.

You know, I've seen a couple of musicals. All I'm saying is, I love that. I like that. I like that. I like that that's why you said, did I go to the West End in London to see Billy Elliot? Because from your experience, one travels across the Atlantic for the sole purpose of going to a play on the West End.

You're putting way too much thought into me saying, did you go see it in London? Rather, I cracked the code. It was literally just me going, oh, did you go see it? You said, did you go across the, did you travel to London? Francis, you go, you started the conversation being like, have you got, you haven't seen Billy Elliot. And then you were, I could see tears

in the back of your eyes being like, this movie changed my life. This is you straw manning. This is you straw manning. No, and then you go, and then you're and then you were I could see tears in the back of your eyes being like this movie changed my life this is this and then you go and then straw man and then you go you go and then you know it came to it was it was on it was in in London they were they made it a play and I said oh did you go see it no no no no no no no that's exactly what happened it's not what happened I said suggested that I know that I went all the way to England for the musical. That's the only reason I would have asked.

That's how we got here. All right. By the way, do you know what straw man is? No. Straw man argument? I do not. Have you heard that before? I've heard the term.

I had to look this up because I've heard it a lot, but I never really understood what it was. Yeah. Straw man. Straw man. Straw man. Yeah, it's when someone, let's say that you and I were arguing, right? If I were to create or summarize

a version of your argument incorrectly for the purpose of defeating a lesser argument, right? Does that make sense? Yeah. It's like I incorrectly attribute your point or I make it a slightly different, weaker version of your argument so that I can come over the top and dunk it. Yeah.

And you're like, well that that's. Yeah, straw man. You're like, that's not even really what I was saying, but nobody cares. It's very. Yeah. You're kind of just describing my day to day like, oh yeah. And that's what you just did. Yeah.

That's what you just did. Yeah, I am the straw man. You're straw man me. You made me the straw man. I'm not made of straw. You are. I'm no scarecrow. You're a scarecrow. No, you're the scarecrow. Yeah, I'm the wizard of Oz. I'm not made of straw. You are. I'm no scarecrow. You're a scarecrow.

No, you're the scarecrow. Yeah, I'm the wizard of Oz. You're the scarecrow. Oh. What did the Tin Man need? Oil? Oil. That's all he needed? Yeah, he was useless.

No, come on, he needed something else. No, he needed oil. That can't be. That's all he needed. They went all the way to Oz to get oil for him? No, I have no idea. I think he got a heart. The lion needed a heart. The lion needed a heart.

The lion got a heart. For courage. For courage. Brain, that sounds right. And the wicked witch of, or the, what was the girl's name? Yes, brain. What was the girl's name?

Glinda? Dorothy? Gorilla? Dorothy. Dorothy, yes. Dorothy needed some good dick. That's why they went to the Oz. Glad you used the right nomenclature there. My tin friend needs a brain. I need some dick.

I need to sit on a rock hard cock. My scarecrow, he needs a heart for courage. Me, I need some cock. Is there no cock in this town? Follow the yellow brick road. Because the midgets over at the fucking, at the factory weren't getting it done. What were they called? The munchkins.

The munchkins? The munchkins did not do what I needed to be done. Yeah. So I'm here to see you mr. Oz Dorothy if you just tap your shoes together a rock hard cock will appear That movie there's no place like cock there's no place like cock Alright I was. I was... I forget what I was going to say. I was going to say something about your Marquise.

Oh yeah? I just keep on thinking about the story and laughing so hard. I'm glad. Yeah. I'm so glad. Marquise is also, I think, a French term for a nobleman or something. The Marquise of Saad?

Or Stad or something like that? Isn't that a thing? You ever heard of that? No. It might mean the bishop or the prince or something like that. I've heard, I kind of know what you're talking about. Yeah.

We talked to Rhone today. We spoke to Rhone. Yeah, briefly. Rhone on the phone. Business call. Just talking business. He's good. Yeah, he's well. Didn't phone. Business call. Just talking business. He's good. Yeah, he's well.

Didn't hear any babies crying in the background, a little bit suspicious. No, he hasn't taken the duct tape off. Does that right before feeding time. Mouth tape, he's sleep taping them. Getting them started young. Yeah. Getting them started young. Yeah.

Yeah. Imagine if Rowan posted the photos of his babies and they have the fucking. You'll thank me later. That would be on. The nose is actually one of nature's most wonderful filtration systems. Their jawlines are gonna be fucking phenomenal.

That's like the whole thing. Apparently improves your jawline. Isn't there another term for something, not jelking, but like, mewing. Yeah, mewing. Yeah. Yeah. Mewing is a different thing, though.

I don't really know what it is. I think it's just like tightening, or I think it's a chew. It's like when you go like this. Yeah, it's something like that. I think you chew on that thing though. I've always thought that thing was crazy. Hey, do you know what?

What? Yesterday I played in a charity golf outing. Oh, very fun. And on the first tee. Good weather yesterday too. It was okay. It was like 65 and sunny. Morning was cold and there were spits of rain.

Oh, okay. Not where I was. This was an and there were spits of rain. Oh, okay now where I was This was a event put on by mizuho Which I think is a japanese bank of some kind and I walked up to the first to the Driving range where my buddy was talking to someone a woman And I said hi to him and he turned and said this is michelle Who do you think it was? Michelle Obama.

No. Golf. No idea. Do you remember Michelle Wee? No. Michelle Wee was the next Tiger Woods of golf. Really? Yeah, of women's golf.

Damn. She was supposed to be. What happened? I don't know. She ended up having more of a sort of Jordan Spieth moment. Ah, tough. She won a couple majors, I think, but then faded a little bit and then-

Was the Jordan Spieth, so the Jordan Spieth thing was a huge deal. Like he was really good and now he sucks. Yeah, he won three majors. I wouldn't say he sucks. He's had near come back moment. Look, unfortunately in golf, most people only care about majors at all.

And so if you don't win a major, you know, you're not considered. And I think part of the problem- I know he doesn't actually suck. No. I know he's still one of the greatest golfers on the planet. I think my guess would be part of the problem there is that for some reason in tennis,

we have four majors or four Grand Slams, and in golf there are four majors. And in tennis, we in our lifetime have experienced runs of dominance where every single final of all four majors it seemed, had one of Federer, Nadal, Djokovic, and maybe Murray. And that was it.

These guys just won every time. Whereas golf's not like that. You know what I mean? It seems much harder to actually win every major. And we were also led astray because of Tiger Woods' dominance. Yeah. That just has run a form that's unlike anything

we've ever seen. So for Jordan Spieth, mostly, I think, guys get hot for like a year or two. John Rahm was unbeatable for a year. Yeah. Dustin Johnson got hot for like a year or two. John Rahm was unbeatable for a year. Dustin Johnson got hot for a year. Colin Morikawa has had moments and Jordan Spieth obviously won three majors out of like five or something like that.

Yeah, he was on fire. I remember like so vividly like Jordan Spieth winning all the majors and then like like everyone was like Jordan Spieth, he's got his mental game is out of control. He nothing phases him. He's so sharp in the brain and can't be hurt. And then like the week later you see him and he's like throwing his putter

like into the fucking pond next to the 18 hole. And then you just haven't, he hasn't won anything since. No, but he's won PGA events. Yeah, just no majors. I just don't, he hasn't won anything since. No, but he's won PGA events. Yeah, just no majors. I just don't, he hasn't won any majors. And so people don't, I don't know, for some reason that, you know, look at Rory. Yeah.

I mean, people were kind of like, oh, he's a choke artist, he's all fake news. Yeah. Because he hasn't won a major in 11 years. Well, he was still winning a ton of events. Yeah. How much money do those guys make was still winning a ton of events. Yeah. How much money do those guys make for winning an event? A lot.

Yeah. Millions. Just not the 20 million jackpot. That 20 million is split. The winner of the Masters wins 4.2, won 4.2 this year. And last year was 3.6. Is 4.2 the highest ever been? I think at the Masters, yeah.

Interesting. But there is, the highest ever been. I think at the Masters, yeah. Interesting. But there is, the Players Championship is also a very high purse, even though it's not a major. What's the purse on that? I'm not sure. It might be higher than any of the majors. You don't say. Look, we don't need to talk about golf.

Why? Because it's just too specific. I really don't think it is. Hmm. I think it's actually probably like one of the most popular sports on earth. Well, let's get back to my- Especially under our demographic of white men. My personal experience yesterday. Yeah.

Michelle Wee. Michelle. I mean, she was on Weedies boxes, I think. Of course, yeah. She was, do you remember Freddie Adu? Nope. We've had a few athletes in America who were spoken of as though they were the next this.

Of course, yeah. Freddie Adu was supposed to be the savior of American soccer. He was supposed to be the guy that was gonna break American soccer open and turn it, have us competing on the world stage, and that he was gonna end up playing for Manchester United and all these things, and he didn't pan out.

There was a lot of hype around Freddie. Drugs? I don't know what happened to him. I just don't think he ended up being as good as people thought he was going to be. But Michelle Wee was very, very good. And she, I said, I turned to her, hi Michelle, and she goes, oh, I'm a big fan.

And I was like, what? She goes, I loved your Game of Thrones songs. I said, oh my God. Deep cuts. This is surreal. I couldn't believe that she knew who I was. oh my God. Deep cuts. This is surreal. Yeah. I couldn't believe that she knew who I was. That's crazy.

Because I knew a big time who she was. Yeah. And I said, I'm a big fan. Yeah. And then what? Then we went to London to watch the Book of Mormon. And it was awesome.

That's great. We should have brought her in today. I would have liked to have. We have an open chair. Yeah. Had Michelle Wee on. Yeah, she's awesome. She's a...

Did you get to see her play at all? No, she was just sort of going around shaking hands. Yeah, showing face. I think she works with that bank. But I don't know. I was, it was a starstruck moment. Yeah. And even more took my breath away because of the fact that she knew with that bank. But I don't know. It was a starstruck moment. Yeah. And even more took my breath away because of the fact

that she knew who I was. Oh, yeah. Which was crazy. Yeah, that would be sick. For some reason, those songs got around the golf community. Do you know who Gary Woodland is? Yeah. You do?

I've heard that name before, for sure. He won the US Open at Beville Beach about four or five years ago. And he... Do you watch the full swing doc on Netflix? No, I haven't. Oh, it's good. I'll check it out. So he...

Very good American golfer, very popular guy. And he was diagnosed with a brain tumor or a lesion or something like that on his brain and had to have brain surgery. And that was a year, couple years ago. But right before that happened, his manager, assistant, something like that emailed me and said, hey, it's Gary's birthday in a week or so. He loves your Game of Thrones songs.

Any chance you could make one for him? Damn. And I was like, oh my God. That's hilarious. So I strapped on my fucking cape, sat down at the piano, it was like, Sunday, game of friends day, Gary's birthday, I'm excited, I'm excited, I'm excited.

I had to cater that song to Gary Woodland's birthday and then like a week later, he has a brain tumor and I felt responsible. So did you send him another? No, I didn't want it. The damage had been done. That's tough, but at least he got the, he probably watched the video when he was in the hospital. He did say he liked it.

He messaged me. I think his brain tumor happened more than a week or two later. But he, he messaged me and then I asked if he wanted to play around at my club and he said he wouldn't be around for a bit, but then he ended up going to play at my club and asked if I wanted to join and I couldn't sadly. Why?

I don't know, I was busy that day. I can't remember, it was really sad and- That's a schedule clear. I know. Gotta find your way to the club on a day like that. Alrighty, let's talk about Factor. I know. Gotta find your way to the club on a day like that. Alrighty, let's talk about Factor. Make this your best season yet with nutritious two-minute meals from Factor.

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now for me has gotten pretty high. Yeah. And that's not because I'm like a hotshot. It's because I just don't like to do stuff. Oh, absolutely. What's something that is a schedule? But a schedule clearer is something that is so appealing that you say, I'm fine facing the consequences

of canceling all of this stuff so that I can do this. I know, and it's not even so much canceling everything now as it is getting over the hurdle of, I didn't have that planned. That's a bit of a grind to do. To get to the course. Or to, yeah, to whatever, that planned, that's a bit of a grind to do. Or to, yeah, to whatever. And therefore, it had better be really worth it.

Yeah, that's a good question. What's that for you? Let's say that you had, you were in the middle of a really heavy work touring season and you were doing tons of work shooting and heavy podcasts and all this, just like pretty burned out. And someone said, hey dude, what do you think of this?

You're gonna have to rent a car and spend the entire day making it happen, but it's gonna happen. I think I have an idea of what it might be. For me? Do say. Okay, you ready for this? I'm ready.

Harry, I've got Steven Rinaldi? The outdoorsman. Okay. Is that his name? Steven Rinaldi? Who am I talking about?

The most famous hunter right now. He's like the biggest guy. I'm not really into hunting. I don't think it's Stephen Rinaldi. Well, but he's also just an avid outdoorsman. Stephen Rinella? Rinella. Yeah, Stephen Rinella.

I got Stephen Rinella. He's a huge fan of yours, specifically Hairball. Yeah. His favorite thing is the me meme. Yeah. In fact he uses it all the time to respond to texts. People are like, Stephen you want to come fishing? He's like, me? He's a big fan of you. Yeah. And he has access to private private rivers on private land with only wild rainbows. And these ones, they've been fed by the chemical off waters of a recent pharmaceutical processing plant. So they're massive.

So they're fucking gigantic. Yeah. And they're made for good eat, and you eat them. And Steven knows how to prep them right there over an open flame, and he wants to fish with you in this place that's private, because he's buddies with the owner. And you want to come out? Do you think you could do that? You think you could make that happen?

You would do that. You'd drop everything. Steve, unfortunately, I'm swamped this week, not going to be able to make it. You're telling me, me, Steve, Renella, that you're not going to come fish with me, the nuclear Chernobyl trout of Pittsburgh, of the Pittsburgh private waterways? It's tempting, it's definitely tempting, but I don't know if that's a schedule clear for me. Damn dude, all right, well then you tell me,

what is the schedule? Oh, actually I know, I got one, ready? Hi Harry, it's mom. I've got tickets to... Wicked. To Wicked. It's only doing a limited run in London. Yeah, I'd have to clear the schedule for that. You sure would. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, yeah, I would say he's going

fishing with Steve probably wouldn't be a schedule clear just because I don't know him personally. You know him well enough to call him Steve, not Steven. Like I would say like if my friends called me and were like, hey, we planned a surprise trip, we're gonna go fishing in Central Pennsylvania, big Browns, streamers. I'd say, yeah, I'll clear the schedule. What if they said it was in Montana? Yeah, absolutely, I would clear the schedule. More likely for Montana than Pennsylvania?

They could say we're gonna go fish in Central Park. We just all got here and I would clear the schedule. I love that. I love that. That's great. Yeah. Cool. So it's fishing.

It really is. Yeah, probably fish is something fishing related. I guess like, you know, I like going to... I'm trying to think of what another schedule clearer would be. You know, maybe like a football game. Like if someone was like, oh, we got field passes to go to at Gillette Stadium. Clear the schedule. Yeah.

Call Mike. Mike, cancel everything. What about, you know, if one of the big eSports COD teams clear the schedule, come, come, come shoot with us, come hang out, come tour the facility. Yeah. Schedules cleared. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you're lucky in that your schedule remain you keep it open.

No, my schedule is jam packed. Mine's jam packed. Yeah. Yeah, I'm the busiest I've ever been, easily. Non-stop grinding. Wanna pull out, do you put your shit in your Google calendar? No. How do you keep track of what you have to do? Well, I did, I used to and I kinda stopped.

You just don't even put stuff in anymore? Like that's like, I have like my tour dates. Go to your month, the whole month view. Go to the month view. How do you do that? You hit, you hit the. This is Apple. That's mine.

Yeah, we're using two different platforms. Look at this, check out that week. Look at this month, dude. I was home for four days. Damn. That's tough. Maybe, yeah, four days, I think. Check out these weeks right here.

Look, I don't wanna get into... I mean, if we're gonna be showing off, not a lot of free days on that. I think there's about one. Just saying, we're going to be flashing schedules. Yeah. We're having a busy off. What would it be for me?

What's my schedule clear? I mean, what if someone called you this weekend and they were like, you were important. You had Providence booked, right? And they were like, masters, free tickets, free flight. What do you say? Fuck, man. Free flight, free hotel.

Yeah, again. They're going to put you up in the body armor house. See, this is what I'm talking. This is exactly what I'm talking about. You'd say no? It sounds amazing. Yeah. Remove the body armor part because that makes it

conflicting because that makes it like a work thing. Okay. So I'm talking about canceling work for something pleasurable. Yeah. Right? But it's kind of like a once in a lifetime opportunity. Sure. Yeah. I know that to go

do that requires me flying, staying in a hotel, doing this and that. But it's one of your nice hotels. It's not, you know, we'll put you up at the Four Seasons for the weekend. Yeah, again, my initial reaction is this is an amount of exertion from, you know, walking around, probably entertaining, doing whatever. There's gonna be some expectation. I'm gonna have to do something for this. There's no free lunch, right? I'm telling you, this is a free lunch. There's no free lunch. This is my, okay. I'm gonna do something for this. Nothing, there's no free lunch, right? I'm telling you, this is a free lunch.

There's no free lunch. This is my, okay. I'm gonna owe something for this. This is 10 years in the future. I've hit it big. I'm worth billions. Francis, my gift to you for your birthday, all-inclusive free master's tickets.

Yeah, that's- But, you've got ComedyWorks Denver sold out five shows. Fuck, see then I wouldn't be able to cancel that. I wouldn't be able to cancel it. And I'm gonna pay you 10 grand on top. Just to go. Now we're talking. Just to go. Now we're talking.

So your schedule clearer is a lot harder than mine. But dude, even then I'd have- You're a little bit more picky on the schedule clearing than I am. Yeah. Even then I'd have this weird guilt. I'd have a ton of guilt about bailing on the people who had bought tickets to that show.

Oh, 100%. Also, I don't think I would cancel a full weekend at Denver Comedy Works. No. Because that's already gonna be fun and so. I wouldn't do it at Providence. Any place where the ticket sales are that high. And I think that, I don't know if it's Masters tickets.

What is something that I'm really dying to do? I'll tell you, I know exactly what it is. It's playing Augusta myself. That's what it would be. I would cancel everything to play Augusta. I would cancel everything, playing it myself, not anywhere near the Masters. I think Augusta. I would cancel everything, playing it myself. Not anywhere near the Masters. Okay.

What's the closest course you can play? I think Augusta. And not? Well, as far as you're saying, like a public course? Or like a theater course? I mean, as I've said, I've played Pine Valley, which is ranked the number one course in the country. That's probably the nicest. I've played Shinnecock, I've played national.

I wrote a blog about this. I wrote a blog that was the top 10 golf courses I've played that make other people jealous that I've played them. It's a very specific criteria. It's not the 10 nicest courses I've played. It's the courses that have the most cachet. Right? So there are courses that are in people's minds more coveted. Of course.

Wearing a hat with that logo, people say, oh my God. Are you- You got on there? So now I got a good question for you because I saw this on Twitter yesterday. Are you, like, so you said you got the hat, you get the hat, you go to the course, you get the hat, you rock the hat. People look, they say, you know, that guy, something's up. He's got a connection. Where do you get that fucking hat?

Yeah. Yeah. Do you think people should be allowed to wear master's gear if they don't go to the masters? Good question. Because people on Twitter are saying you shouldn't be able to, which I strongly disagree with. Yeah, good question. I mean, I don't have any problem with people wearing masters gear, and here's why.

Anyone- Because it's sick, they made good gear. They got good gear. Well, it's not just that. It's that to me, you go to the masters, you buy masters gear. Super cool. Have your souvenir. Great. There's a gigantic difference between wearing masters gear

and Augusta national gear. I see. You go and you get that invite to go play Augusta national and you get a piece of gear. You head into that pro shop. And you're in that pro shop. Now I don't know. pro shops like a fucking Walmart. I've never been Wait, what do you mean by that? I don't know if it is multiple floors the one at Pine Valley is tiny really

Yeah, pro shops are sick. That's just cuz I'm a gear head though You know that you know that too. That's my favorite part hitting the pro shop. Ohoopi, Ohoopi was my favorite pro shop. I don't know if I've ever really been to any really nice pro shops. Ohoopi Match Club. I like taking all the free ball markers. Yeah. Just grab it.

Frankie Burelli collects the scorecard pencil from every golf course he's played and he's gonna create a giant sort of display of them in a frame. That's sick. That's a cool thing. Some people take a golf ball with the logo from every place. Oh yeah.

I like that. I get hats, cause it's the cheap. I don't need any more quarter zips at this point. No. You know what I mean? You really only need one. Hats are cheaper. They're like 30 bucks.

So I buy a hat. I have the logo. I wear them. You a visor guy at all? No. I could see it. Not really. I bought one when I was out in LA.

I played a course out in LA and I bought a visor and it just makes me look like I'm heading to a NASCAR race. When I wear a visor, my hair is so straight that it, and it's long, that it goes over the rim of the visor. I know what you mean. Like it perfectly flops over the side.

I'd really like to see that. And I'm like, this looks terrible. God, see you weren't a 90s kid. Yeah. Visors had a moment. Oh, I know. We wore visors all through the late 90s, early 2000s. It was really early 2000s.

Yeah. When we were shopping at Hollister, Aero Postale, American Eagle, and Abercrombie. Yeah. But we, I mean, I'd go to Lids in the mall. Pick up a- And I'd wear a visor. Would you get a flat cap visor?

Mm-mm. Mm-mm. That would be hilarious. I got the one with the see-through blue cellophane lid. Oh. It's got a see-through lid, like a dome. I didn't have that. But who are elderly people playing shuffleboard wear those? Really?

Yeah, the one that's like the lighter with the dome. The light blue fucking lid. I don't know if I've seen it. And it's like plastic. Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I know what you're talking about. Those are great, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I know what you're talking about. Those are great.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Those are strictly sun protection. Is there, do you wish- Zero style points. Do you wish, let me ask you something. Ask me. You were a child of the, of the aughts. Sure. The aughts is the decade of 2000 to 2010, right?

Yeah. What is that, what is that decade? What that decade, what is your nostalgia of that decade as a kid growing up in that time? We were born in what, 97, 98? Me? Yeah. I was born in 2001. Okay.

So my, I guess growing up, I mean right off the bat, 9-11. Okay, we're not doing that again Doing what you you we're not doing this. We're not going down that road. I don't understand You're asking me what what it was like growing up for me Yeah, but but I remember I was born and then I remember I was scared terrible I was horrified for years. I had to go into therapy when I was like three. A lot of us did, a lot of us 2000. We've just done this, we've done this so many times. And it never gets old.

It's a hitter. It is. Yeah. Now I would say like nostalgia for me is like I Don't know like Zack and Cody TV yeah TV, but all right in Disney Channel. That's fair Club Penguin. Yeah Yeah, webkins was big when I was really young What's that like a stuffed animal that you would you'd buy at the store? It's actually a pretty good idea.

You'd buy the stuffed animal at the store, and then it had a barcode or like a QR code on it, and you'd scan that, and then it would like upload your stuffed animal onto the game. And then it was like kind of like Sims, like you had like a house and you could like build on and stuff, but it was your stuffed animal in the game.

I love this. I don't know anything about this. That was great. That's your version of our Tamagotchi. Yeah, yeah. But we had Tamagotchi too. No, you didn't. No, the technology had improved.

They were obsolete. I had a Tamagotchi. But that's because you bought them at like a nostalgia store. Probably bought them at like a Walmart. One that was going out of business. Because of how successful Amazon had become by that. No, Amazon was not successful when I was a child.

All right, so you, I had as a 90s kid growing up in the 90s, I remember the bare naked ladies. I remember the music, Sublime, Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears, N'Sync, things like that. Jewel, my hands are small, I know. Yeah, you're thinking not when you're a child though. You're thinking when you were like a teenager. But it's like 10. Which is when I was a child.

So my nostalgia from being a child is the same as yours of being a teenager but it's like 10 when I was a child so my nostalgia from being a child is the same as yours of being a teenager but I was 12 when you were born okay so but like I was like Britney Spears was big when I was very young but you don't remember her you weren't conscious yes I do weren't consuming I'd sing star 2 on PlayStation 2. I remember singing Oh, baby, baby Hit me baby one more time. Yeah, when did that come out? I don't fucking know but I remember it I thought that was in the late 90s. I think you're wrong. Hang tight. She was on Sing Star 2 not one Did you have Dance Dance Revolution?

We didn't have it like at home. Okay, you ready for this? Yeah. Hit me baby one more time. Debut single 1999. Really? Yep. I wonder why it wasn't on Sing Star 1.

Right? The fray? Yeah, there you go. That's, that makes sense. I was a heartbroken teenager making mixtapes with fray songs for girls that didn't like me on Valentine's Day. Yeah. And you were singing it on Sing Star 2. That's when you were a kid. Yes, I was a kid. Perfect. What was the style when you were in 10 to 13? What was the, what were clothing, what was that like?

Pretty similar to just what I wear now. Kind of just shorts and a t-shirt. You know, maybe we had like some flashy stuff. I wanted Jinko jeans more than anything. Yeah, we didn't have Jankos. But we were rocking like, there would be kids walking around in like and one basketball shorts like fucking down to the ankles Yeah, oh yeah neon green basketball shorts pulling up to school

Like the brightest screen you've ever seen mm-hmm if you were deep in in the Canadian woods you'd be able to spot me a mile away. Mm-hmm. With those shorts on. Mm-hmm. And zigs. What's that? Zigs.

What's that? Reeboks. Reebok zigs. What were they? They were just shoes that the soles were. Zigs. We had Nike Shocks. Yeah.

That was our big shoe like that. Yeah. Air Forces. I was obsessed with Allen Iverson. Air Maxes. You ever have Air Maxes? Air Max 95s? I wasn't cool enough to know that those were cool.

I had them. And I told people I said I'd kill you if you tried me for these. In high school, kids started wearing those Get it the game What I kill you if you try me for my MX 95s the game said that yeah Hmm hated or love it 50. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes That's that's your nostalgia. You should be up on that G unit had a pair of Reeboks that they made. Really? Mm-hmm. The G-Unit.

The G-Unit box? Mm-hmm. I gotta take a peek at these things. They were cool. People had them. They weren't that expensive, I don't think. I thought about it for a while. Didn't do it.

Didn't pull trig. Pretty generic. Yeah, they were understated. They kinda just looked like my shoes. Yeah, they were understated. So that's cool look like my shoes. Yeah, they were understated. So that's cool. I'm glad I got to the bottom of that with you. Guess how much they are. Now?

Yeah. Are they expensive? They're not crazy expensive for shoes. What, 200 bucks? No, they're 1500. What? There's, oh no, the women's are 1,500, 500, 500. Are you looking on StockX?

1,100. It's all like eBay and- Yeah. Hmm. Well. But that's how much people pay for like crazy shoes. I guess so. Right.

Yeah. We're just not shoe guys. I was. You were. You remember? You weren't around yet. I went through a big shoe phase. Yeah. I just have always been obsessed with trying to find ways

to get things that other people have a hard time getting. I'm a treasure hunter. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. So if you were to tell me right now, if you're like, dude, I am obsessed. I'm obsessed with, you know, golden jewels,

like the jewel that you smoke. obsessed with, you know, golden jewels, like the jewel that you smoke. Okay. I don't even smoke jewels. You'd go get one though. I would do everything in my power to dedicate all of my time to finding as many of them as I could. What if it costs 10 Gs?

I would find a way to get them for retail. I would travel to London if I had to. Yeah, I'm not like that at all. Take in a show, then meet some guy in Piccadilly or Covent Garden. Interesting. Very interesting. I still can't get over the fact that Pat Bev

came on the pod and carries loose diamonds. Yeah, I don't really understand that either. I said at the time, are you doing an arms deal? That's what it seems like, right? That's the only time I've ever seen people trade in diamonds. Yeah, it's not like he's going to Dwayne Reed being like, all right, let me cut you off a sliver.

In exchange for this cliff bar. Cause the only thing that can cut a diamond is a diamond. Right? Yeah, of course. I don't know if that's true. In Minecraft, iron I think actually cuts diamond. The Minecraft movie you saw that theaters around the country people are destroying them.

Yeah, teens. That's your generation. Teens everywhere, no, not my generation, that's teens. Why are you guys such ruffians? I don't really know why they're doing that but that's not like a new thing I remember when I went to see the life of Timothy green with my mom and my and my friend and my siblings and We went to London and Teens set off firecrackers in the theater

We had to evacuate the building because we were like there's a shooting happening right now yeah that's scary it was pretty crazy and it was like two girls hmm wow they're probably on only fans I actually think that can I can you tell me if this is wrong? Yeah, they would be. Firecrackers in the theater is a one-way path to OnlyFans. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Like I'm going down the same path. Like I feel like Twitch streaming's not as far, not that far off from being an OnlyFans girl. When you end the stream and then it's just you sitting there, sick. Is there an amount of money that if someone said,

hey, I want you to crank your hog at the end of the stream? No, there's no amount of money. None? None. No, there really isn't. No. No amount of money? None. None. No, there really isn't. One billion dollars. No. I really don't think there's an amount of money.

Cause I think I'm pretty comfortable enough right now that like, oh yeah, obviously a billion dollars. I would never have to work again a day in my life and no one I know would ever have to work again. But the shame. Like I wouldn't be able to have a normal life after that. They would be like, be like, imagine like going out to dinner with someone. They're like, how did you get this reservation? And you're like, ah, I

jerked off on stream a decade ago and got a billion dollars for it. Yeah. And at which point nobody would care. Because you know why, hairball? Because everyone's gonna have to do that eventually. It's gonna be the new, that's gonna be how we live. It could be. Time to clock in to the jerkin' off fuckin' stream. But it also could be that the people you're talking to

weren't assessing your candidacy for Catholic school. Yeah, but everyone that has that amount of money. What does that disqualify you from? If you have a billion dollars, all people are asking is, how did that person get a billion dollars? Fine. Oh, what do they do?

Okay, so- Oh, he jerks off on camera. All right. Yeah, that's not what I want people to say about me. But people, we know people that have OnlyFans, and you say, well, how do they, we don't even I want people to say about but people we know people that have only fans and you say well How do they? They oh, we don't even say that we say oh they make this amount of money on only fans and my reaction isn't Or it's holy shit. I don't blame her I would do the same Now I don't actually know

because my circumstances are different, right? It's to your point. Who knows what went behind that decision. I think that's what we wanna believe is that we say, good for them. Okay. I think deep down you go, whore. No, I don't I I don't care if anyone does only fans

I don't care if anyone has only fans I'm saying that's not something that like I think there's also I think it's also a lot more socially acceptable for a woman to do OnlyFans than it is for me to be playing video games for three hours and then at the end of it wrap it up with me jerking off on camera. Is there a nudity thing on Twitch? Yeah. No nudity. It's banned. Yeah they would shut my stream off. I saw this clip once of like a girl pulling her tits out on a Twitch stream and all the people that were on the mic were like, no, no! Yeah, I think you just get banned immediately. It'd be like if we uploaded the podcast to YouTube one day and all of our dicks were out in the fucking thumbnail.

They'd be like, yeah, no, this is not, you're not allowed to do that. This isn't a porn website. I just don't know the, I don't know the different this is not, you're not allowed to do that. This isn't a porn website. I just don't know the, I don't know the different streams because Twitter, you can do anything. Oh, Twitter, you could kill someone on stream. Yeah. And they'd be like, it's, it's not against our terms of service. So we have to leave it up technically. This is what I was going to say to you last episode that I forgot.

I've been seeing, I've been getting fed this new thing that is amazing. It's Thailand military service. And it is apparently, and I have no idea if this is true or not, but apparently it's a lottery. If you get selected for mandatory military service, right? And they draw a card. If it's red, you go. If it's black, you don't. And the soldiers are there and then the new candidate comes forward and they keep showing videos on this particular channel of the most effeminate, gay, presumably gay men walking forward for this selection process wearing high heels, lipstick,

rouge. And the soldier takes their hand and like twirls them. And then they draw the card. And then they tell them, you're not in the military. And then these guys start like weeping and like trying to kiss the cheeks of the soldiers and everybody's part of it. Everybody's on board. It's very funny. Yeah, I gotta see this. I wanna find one of these.

You gotta send me that. I will. It's great. That's what I've been seeing a lot of lately. That's crazy. The mandatory draft lottery shit is insane. That's like that big K-pop. Were they in Thailand?

That's K-pop is Korea. I know that's Korean. They got, they're just in the military now? All of them? I think so, yeah. And they were like the biggest band probably on the planet. There are exemptions. It was that golfer who in the Olympics,

if he had won a medal, I think, he would have been exempt from military. And he missed it by like one putt. That's so fucked up. That's unbelievably fucked up. Make this putt and you don't have to do basic training in two years of military service in a country that, well, I guess it's better that they're not

really in any wars, although there's always the threat from North Korea. Of course. The looming threat. All right. That was fun. Oh, that's it? Yeah. Okay.

We've been going for well over an hour. Is that so? How fun. Hey, I'm enjoying this. I'm enjoying getting to know you again. I'm learning so much about you. Totally, yeah. Was England the only place that you guys went

as a family for that trip? Yes. How many European, have you been to any other European countries? France and Italy. With your family? No. Buddies?

Solo, dolo. You went alone? No, with my buddies. That's not solo. I didn't go with my family. Italy and France on the same trip with them? Yeah. That sounds cool.

I'd like to hear about that. Yeah, it was fun. Might as well save it for our next episode. We will. The travels of Hairball, Sasquatch, Bo, Peters, Nate, Francis couldn't make it. Francis couldn't make it. All right. Awesome. All right.

I'll be in Kansas City, West Niyak, Dallas, and Chicago to round out my spring tour. I'm excited about that. Chicago's flying. Tickets at punchup.live slash Francis Ellis. And I'll see you there. What do you got? Oh my God. Edmonton next week.

And Philly, the second weekend of May. I think it's like around May 8th, and those tickets are going fast. Nice. Get them while you can. Goodbye. Close was over, till you came around. I was only falling one way. I was only falling one way

Days were drifting For, for was I So, so then you listen Now I come alive I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way

Fetish drew your eye Did you realize No one could take me alive I was only falling one way See you just a distant light, feel it fast forever bright Call it just a memory, take my hand and you can see I'm falling I'm falling Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, When I fall Banished to your earth Did you realize No one could take me alive Be alive