Son of a Boy Dad - Crazy Rich White Boys | Son of a Boy Dad #319

Episode Date: July 22, 2025

Crazy Rich White Boys | Son of a Boy Dad: Episode #319 -- #Ad: To join the chat, go to boydad.chat -- #Ad: Go to your Happy Place on July 25 with Happy Gilmore 2, only on Netflix -- #Ad: Download the Gametime app today and use code BOYDAD for $20 off your first purchase -- #Ad: Go to https://vuori.com/BOYDAD for 20% off your first purchase. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. -- #Ad: See Oh, Hi! starring Molly Gordon & Logan Lerman, only in theaters on July 25! Tickets are on sale now at https://ohhimovie.com -- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, son of a boy, dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Yeah. All right. Welcome back to the Son of a Boy Dad podcast. Today it is July 21st. It's 1140 p.m. Little later, a.m., not p.m. Little later than we would have hoped, but I'm partially to blame for that.

No, you are to blame for that. See, I knew you were gonna say that, and I was running it through in the Uber. I was thinking about it and I was like, technically if you really think about it, Francis was 15 minutes late. And then I was 15 minutes late from Francis's 15 minutes late. 25 minutes late from my 15 minutes.

Well, 25 would mean I got here right now. Nope. No, that would be 30. I got here at 11 15 and and it's now 11.34. Yeah. So you got here at 11. What? We already said that.

So I opened the show. Right. 11.44. Oh, no, you got here 10 minutes ago. Yeah, probably. Right, so I was 15 minutes late to you, or 15 minutes late. Right, so, yeah. So, yeah, grown.

Yes. Great job today. You have no idea when I showed up. I could have walked in one minute before you. Or I could have been crack a don. I was scrambling. I'm going to Wyoming tomorrow. I texted the group that I was gonna be 15 minutes late, and I felt really bad about it. I texted the group that I was going to be 15 minutes late and I felt really bad about it.

I was driving from where I live upstate and it's two hours and I left the house and- Either early or you're late. 20 minutes into the drive, I realized that I didn't have my phone. And so I had to double back, go get the phone and then restart the trip. And then I texted the group and said,

guys, I'm really sorry, I'm gonna be 15 minutes late. Of course. And then sure enough, you showed up 30 minutes late. Wow, no. Which meant that I never needed to send the text. I shouldn't have sent the text. I was ready to go. I was up at eight.

I've been up for hours. You just base off the latest, off the latest late. And you're like, that's the new time and I'm gonna add 15 minutes to that. No, I obviously did not, I didn't plan on getting here 15 minutes after your 15 minute delay. I planned on getting here at 11 15.

It just didn't work out like that. If I'd never sent the text, what time would you have gotten here, be honest? 11 15. I don't believe that 100% Well, that that's just that's just a coincidence that's a miracle that we would have shown up at the same exact time I kind of have a pretty good gauge on like around when to show up Based on like what when Rome will be here and when you'll be here. Do you text him individually?

No, but you can get an idea. How? If he's not texting in the group chat at all, it means he's probably late. I love that you are testing the wind and the fucking like cloud signatures of the world. You are Pocahontasing your tardiness. That's just routine. You're painting with all the colors of the wind.

Wait, so I wasn't texting this morning and I wasn't late. You're saying if I don't text, it means I'm late? Occasionally, yeah. I think that's flawed science. Yeah, usually he's late because he tells us he's gonna be late because he's dealing with his children. My convenient excuse. I don't know about that.

Maybe get some children and you'll have an excuse and people will look on you more fondly. I know, it's not a bad idea. As opposed to just knowing that you were just gooning for an extra 15 minutes, that you were abusing yourself. An extra 15 minutes of goon time. That's what the real truth is. Yeah. You cracked it.

Can I ask you about your gooning? I don't, yeah sure. Do you take your shorts and just pull them and put them all the way down around your ankles and then goon? I don't, yeah, sure. Do you take your shorts and just pull them and put them all the way down around your ankles and then goon? I don't even know what that, I don't even really, to be honest, I don't know what gooning is. We've been over this many times

and I still don't understand it. He goes, he fishes up his shorts. So he'll like pull up the leg and push it to the side. Cool. I see. He dangles out the bottom right. I see. Francis, without looking at this, what kind of rod, what kind of club do you think this is? Club is that? I would guess that that's a pitching wedge.

It is a pitching wedge. That's pretty good. Spot on. Pretty good golf. That's pretty good. That's pretty good golf idea. Just seeing the angle. Well, you're ready. You're ready for the creators' invitation. I would say none. For sure. You fucking Horvath, Santino, oh my god to be a fly in that golf cart. Nate Shot, when is that?

August 12th to the 16th. Will you say hello to Nate Shot for me? I don't know who that is. Well, you're going to see him there. But does he know who you are? God, no. Then why would I tell him you said hello? Just say my buddy's a big fan.

Say the guy I do a podcast with, I work with him every single day. Don't you think that everything you just said for me to tell him, if I said that to him, he'd be like, get the fuck away from me. No, I don't think so. Hey, my buddy that I do a podcast with is a big fan and he wanted me to tell you hello. Well, you guys are playing in a golf tournament together. It's not like you're approaching him on the streets. Just so you know, Nate Sch big fan and he wanted me to tell you hello. Well, you guys are playing in a golf tournament together. It's not like you're approaching him on the streets.

Just so you know, Nate Schott, I don't know. Literally just go up to him and say, hey, my buddy's a huge fan of yours. I've been watching his videos since I was in second grade. That's not the way I do things. Also saying your buddy's a good fan kind of means I don't know you. He's like, hey, I don't know who you are,

but I know someone who knows you. But that is exactly the case. Yeah, I think you just keep that to yourself. Or you get familiar and know him yourself. That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to say, hi, my name's Francis. What's your name, Mr. Schott? Mr. Schott, nice to meet you.

If anything, you would refer. I'm looking forward to getting to know you with a blank canvas standpoint here, to really go. You purposefully avoided all of his online footprint for years so you wouldn't have the wrong impression of him once you finally met him. Exactly. I am going at this from a tabula rasa point of view.

You know 100 Thieves? Is that right, Ron? I don't even know. Francis, do you know 100 Thieves? You know 100 Thieves. I'm going to keep the golf club out. It's actually nice. It's like a laser pointer. You know 100 Thieves. Don't you point that picture at me. Do you know 100 Thieves. I'm going to keep the golf club out. It's actually nice. It's like a laser pointer.

You know 100 Thieves. Don't you point that picture in front of me. Do you know 100 Thieves? No, I don't know 100 Thieves. 100 Thieves is like a gaming slash media company. A couple people from Barstool actually left to go work there. That's, Nadeshot started that. Nadeshot.

Yeah, so you'll meet him. 100 Thieves. I don't know if he started. Yeah, I know. I think he started itieves. I don't know if he started, yeah, I know, I think he started it. Should I go up to him and say, hey, I like 100 Thieves? Sure, yeah, I'm sure he'd be thrilled. Okay.

Tell him you like 101 Dalmatians too. I prefer the 40 Thieves who accompanied Alibaba. Yes. I don't know what that is. Alibaba and the 40 Thieves? Nope. It's not original Arabic. And I'm sick of pretending I do know what it is.

Story that stood as the precursor to Aladdin. So it's the prequel to Aladdin. Arabian Nights. It came out before Aladdin? It came out hundreds Aladdin it came out like Hundreds and hundreds of years ago. It's like the original so before a land Yeah, cuz Aladdin only came out like a hundred years ago It probably did I'm but you came out in like

1991 there was like a rap song where they start off being like Alibaba in the 40th is it oh is it fucking rhyming and stealing by the BC boys? It is. And they just say, Ali Baba and the 40 Thieves over and over again. That story has everything. You know what other story has everything? The story of fucking Christ. I know. Isn't it crazy that there's betrayal, that there's everything in that story, what happened? You just, your Achilles just go down? Your Achilles is like one wrong step away from exploding right now. Something, it's the vaccine, so I'm telling you.

Yeah. It doesn't make sense, I mean, everyone's Achilles. Everyone's Achilles and heart attack popping. There's zero reason that our podcasting co-host should have his Achilles being torn. And he was stationary and he just got a pang of pain in it. No, I woke up and it was like, for whatever reason, and all I did, I mean, I played a bunch of racket sports this weekend. You know, a lot of swinging. Yeah. What

are we talking squash? Tennis. I played tennis. I played Padel. And for the word it's worth, I know that it's actually technically pronounced paddle. Not an idea. I say, I say Padel to... Cash Padel. FBI Cash Padel. Epstein didn't do shit. You see that Trump's trying to, he's saying that he's gonna, he's forcing the commanders to go back to the Redskins.

Yeah. And I say, don't, he's gonna freeze their new stadium building. Yeah. It's insane. And he's like, and the guardians have to become the Indians again too. What a wild thing.

And he was like, the water fountains have to be resegregated. I honestly, like, I don't hate the commanders. I thought everyone had kind of made their peace with the commanders I don't know. I saw a dude. I did a show in Seattle. I didn't know this way I didn't know the anti woke people were still griping about I don't think they really are I think there are commanders slash Redskins fans that are still like we want the Redskins back Oh, I saw a dude in size. I saw a dude in Seattle who was wearing a,

he had a commander's shirt and he sewed on a Redskins patch to it. Like he was like, no, I'm not going by the commanders. But he got a new shirt. Like he got a shirt and like customized it. Why would you not just have, keep your old shirt or like buy a vintage shirt? He could have done that. I don't know. But he told me that he sewed it on. Right before they changed, I was doing Man on the Street by the Redskins slash Commander's Stadium. And I happened across a Native American guy and his son. And they were like, we find it to be a, like an honorable nickname. They were like, we like that. We like that it's the Redskins. We think that it does a good homage to the Native American people. Wow. He's like, we're very proud of Marcus Mariota and Robert Griffin III. Terry McLaurin is my favorite player.

Is Terry McLaurin even on the Commanders anymore? Yeah, he is, but he wants a new contract. Yeah, I thought his contract didn't get. He wants to get a new contract. Trump's freezing his contract. Yeah. Trump froze Terry McLaurin's contract until they switched to the Redskins.

That's so crazy to want to do. I'm trying to even think of- I had a really bad joke to tell, but I didn't tell. Do it in Native American voice and it won't be as offensive. It was too fucked. I'm just self-editing so we don't have to do it later.

Smart. But then everybody's gotta be wondering, what was that fucking joke that Francis had? All right, I'll say it. I was gonna say Trump is freezing Terry's contract until he goes back to his slave name. Why, cause Terry, Terry. Just McLoran is like an Irish name.

That's funny. That'd be funny if the Cleveland Indians, like if he made them change, but they just, they are like the Indian people now. They went back to Redskins, they went to Redskins too. The Cleveland Redskins. Everyone has to be Redskins. Everyone has to be Redskins. The Las Vegas hockey team has to be the Redskins too. No I meant that it was like the people from India.

Like still the Indians. The Kansas City smallpox blankets. That is a wild thing to demand. And then he, isn't it like he's doing an executive order about it? He's going to have... I don't know. I just saw it on Truth this morning. Yeah. Social?

Yeah. No, I saw it on Twitter. I saw it on a screen. I saw a screenshot of Truth on Twitter. Yeah. He was getting embodied on Truth. It was like the first time truth turned on him. Over the Epstein stuff? Yeah. The Epstein shit is insane. It's crazy. Well, I know it's crazy because now the left is really reporting on it.

Yeah, yeah. They're really leaning into like, was Trump on the list? Yeah, I mean, I don't, I don't know if it's Trump directly that's on, it's clearly someone's on the list that like, they're like, this just can't come out, right? Like that's what it seems like, or multiple people are on the list that they're like, this just, it's not even an option to put this out. But who would Trump be protecting to that degree that he knows he's going gonna create this level of suspicion.

Someone powerful. Goes all the way to the top. Yeah. Who would he even, I mean, like, the powerful dude draw on it. Jared? Fucking Jared. Jared Trump?

Jared Trump? Jared Karabas? Barron. Barron Trump. Barron's on it. That would, if a barron, isn't that right? That was gonna be it? I was gonna say Baron's one of the victims.

That would have been a bad... Well, I guess it still is a bad joke, but... It's better when you admit it's a bad joke before you say it. You know what I watched last night for the first time? Is the Paterno movie. That shit was cheeks. Wait, the movie? That shit sucks.

The HBO? The HBO show? The Al Pacino... The HBO? Wait, the movie? Shit sucks. The HBO show? The Al Pacino. The HBO show. Yeah, the HBO show. Put that fucking pitching wedge down. My God. A baton. He's fucking...

Like he's on the flag squad. Yeah, I watched the movie. The movie sucked. There's like one line in the movie where there's like people outside of his house and they like go inside They're like, how about a rub? Oh, yeah There's nothing better than a rub How about a rub?

He's like stressing out about covering a pedophilia and his wife's like how about a rub? Yeah, that whole movie was fucking weird the the the Penn State scenes Were those like super cringeingeworthy for you? Cause for me, I was like, it was like out of body when they're like, when they're chanting Joe Paterno, and then they're chanting like, we are Penn State, we are Penn State. And it's like, I was cringing.

I was like, this is so brutal. Because they're defending the fact that he covered it up? Well, yeah, I mean, it's just any time that there's like- Or that he didn't do enough, right? No, no, they're like, he didn't know. They're like outside like, Joe Paterno. Yeah, yeah, and then his son comes down, they start chanting Scott Paterno.

Yeah, and that shit really all happened. That it's so cult, like, it was so embarrassing. It's so fucking shitty and embarrassing. For years afterwards, I would argue with other Penn State alumni being like, he obviously knew what was going on. No, he actually did it. And here's why. He pretty much just keep on hinting back in the movie

to that it was going on for decades. Who do you think is more dug in on their position, Penn State alums about that situation or Michael Jackson fans about that situation? I think Penn State alums, because Michael Jackson fans, they don't have any implicit connection to Michael Jackson. They're just fans. If you graduated from Penn State, you can't undo that. You're part of the Penn State community,

whether you're a football fan or not. Like a Michael Jackson fan is this like transitive like. Sure, but I've had arguments with Michael Jackson fans, just for fun really, to watch them get unbelievably upset when you insist. That they look at the man in the mirror. I mean. That he touched those kids.

It's not a bad question. You're pretty much asking though, like, what's bigger, like, pop stars or college football? And it's a good question. Well, Michael Jackson is the biggest star ever, period. Yeah. Penn State might be the biggest program though. Penn State or Michael Jackson? People- And it's a good question.

People worship Michael Jackson to this day with a religious ferocity that rivals that of what people felt about Penn State football. Yeah, but I'm saying, do you think the people that are dot, do you think the biggest Michael Jackson fan is a bigger Michael Jackson fan than the biggest Texas A&M fan? The biggest Penn State fan would kill, like, cover up and fucking move mountains, cash, and bodies.

But I think, Mike, I think you're underestimating the Michael Jackson fans. I agree. I kind of agree. I think it's pretty similar, to be honest. They are certain of the illegitimacy of the claims of the victims of Michael Jackson. Yeah, they're certain of it, which is one of those things where I'm like, okay, I would treat that with

agnosticism at best. Yeah, like if I were the biggest Michael Jackson fan in the world, I'd be like, look, I don't know how I feel. I don't know that it's right. I don't think it's right. But because saying it never happened is so horrible to deny the claims of children that were molested by Michael Jackson, I'm gonna err on the side of like, kinda sitting this one out. Billy Jean's not bad, but I'm not gonna,

I'm not gonna throw myself on the tracks for this. Yeah, exactly. Or just like keep listening to Billy Jean and also acknowledge that he probably did this stuff. Yeah. Everyone thinks he did. Yeah. I'm not gonna show up and throw eggs

at Wade Robson's house. Yeah. But Macaulay Culkin. But Macaulay Culkin is the one who fucked everyone else, meaning like- Did he? He said it? No, not literally.

Oh. I was gonna say. His insistence that nothing ever happened to him made him the star witness to sort of like make everyone else's claims seem worthless. You know that he was like, they're all lying. And then he like turned to all the other kids and stuck his tongue out at them. Yeah. Fuck you.

You'll never take my spot. I'm gonna be famous forever. It's nine years old. Now, he didn't do anything. It's **** It's **** up. It's super **** up but those movies are so damn good. Oh great. I had a pretty funny, well not funny, it was actually more like brutal. But it was like funny at the same time. Weekend. Well actually I had a great weekend. I had really good spots at the stand.

Great shows. Fun shows. And then I did, well I played a shit ton of Call of Duty, just trying to get up to the diamond so bad. I'm like 30 SR away. And Friday night I had like my, I play with Mooc and my buddy Peters all day. And then I went and did my spots and we played at night. And when we played at night,

I hit the deli on the way home, picked up some Jolly Rancher gummies delicious had like half the bag probably it was I was kind of acting up but I was also kind of considering like you know I'm going away going to Wyoming not going to be playing video games not going to be eating candy you need to kind of build a baseline of nourishment exactly like a bear exactly bear. Exactly. Yeah, yeah. Stacking up for the, for the, for the long, the long three nights. I woke up at 7 a.m. on Saturday and projectile vomited straight Jolly Ranchers. I just ate too much candy and got sick like a child. Like a Halloween child. Yeah, literally that was it. Like I stayed up too late and played too many video games

and ate too much candy and got sick on Friday night. And you projectiled? Yeah. Oh my God. This is so, this is eerie. It's almost rock bottom. Can I tell you why this is eerie? Why?

Because I drove from where I live in the woods. You know how I live in the woods now, upstate? Of course. In the Hudson Valley. I've heard of this. Among the elk and the moose. Yeah, the elves. Yeah, which by the way, hunting season hasn't started yet,

so don't even get any fucking ideas. No, it doesn't start till the fall. That's right, I mean, you better wear some orange. Yeah, sure, I'm not a hunter. Well, there's a lot of people out there with some bad vision these days. I know. I'm just saying, you come wandering

without your orange on. It's not my fault, you come onto my land. Okay, anyway, the point is- 100%. Do you hunt fish? Dude, you are a bit of a hunter. I release. I had a gig in Hampton Bays. Yeah.

Which was really cool, actually. I didn't know what to expect. I drove all the way from Hudson Valley down and out into Long Island. It's a long ass drive. It was like three and a half. Oh, really? Because I left at like 10.30 a.m. If I had left ass drive. It was like three and a half. Cause I left at like 10 30 AM.

If I had left at 11 30 AM, it would have been five and a half. I was going to say, I would assume six. So I got there and did the gig. The gig was awesome. Hampton Bays is like, they call it the working class Hampton. Yeah.

I mean, it's like the last blue collar enclave, but very quickly, it's gentrifying because everything- What are the blue collar jobs there? Yeah. Painting. It's all the people that live there work in South Hampton and West Hampton and East Hampton as landscapers, painters, and you know, and then at the night, that's why the traffic all flows west is because they're coming back to their where they live in the morning, it heads east. But I was making jokes about that because like the idea of it being the working class Hamptons. And I said, I opened the show and I said, I said, Hampton bays is to the Hamptons what El Salvador is to the Hamptons. Salvador is to the Hamptons. I said this is where the Shinnecock tribe comes to buy their cigarettes. The trading posts for the good Shinnecock people. And they were all dying

because everybody at the show, the tickets to the show, you're going to love this, were $75. Jesus Christ. I had no idea until the day of. Yeah, it's Billy Joel prices. I know. Yeah. Dude, you should do this gig though, by the way, because- I don't charge $75 a ticket, sorry brother. No, it's not enough for you.

Couldn't do that. Just couldn't do that. Couldn't do it to the fans. But all the people that came were people who lived in Southampton and Eastampton. So they were laughing at the expense of the blue collar people I was making fun of who weren't there because they couldn't afford the tickets.

Seven-Five ticket. Yeah, but then on the way home, I was driving back with Brandon and we went, yeah. I went to a, nice. I went, we went to a 7-Eleven or whatever. Actually, we went to this grocery store that was like Latin. Like Latin American or like E-I-R.

Yeah, or like the dying language. You fill out your receipt by carving it in stone. Yeah, it was held up on Corinthian pillars. Just the water straight from the aqueduct. No, it was some- Don't look the cashier in the eyes, he'll turn you to stone. It was some Latin grocery store I'd never heard of.

I mean, I don't know, all the goods were Spanish goods. Yeah, yeah, I've been to stores like that. Nothing was organized. Yeah. It looked like the supply truck just drove into the middle of the store, like, opened its wares, and then they took stuff and just threw it out. I've been to a couple grocery stores like that. But it was open at 11, 15 p.m. A grocery store.

That's when the Latins are eating. The regular Cheetos are the flaming hot Cheetos. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and the flaming hot Hot's will send you back across the Rio Grande. But the, anyway, I got a bunch of candy, right? Hairball? Yeah, yeah, what'd you go with?

Okay, so I went with Chewy Sweet Tarts. Those are the best. Wait, did you get the ropes? No. Oh, okay. Chewy Sweet, I think it was Chewy Sweet Tarts. Well, the ropes are the best. Wait, did you get the ropes? No. Oh, okay. Chewy sweet. I think it was chewy sweet tarts. Well, the ropes are the best. Sweet tarts.

Well, I like nerd ropes. These are different. Okay. This is just straight rope. No crunch. No crunch. Just gump, just goo. Yeah, you could repel using these.

Absolutely. Mission Impossible ass ropes. Yeah. Then I went with something new. I was out on a limb and I did mini Skittles. They come in a tube that you can use as an enema. Oh, like the M&M tubes? Yeah.

I can't believe they're still making those. Yeah, I know. Those M&M tubes, I would get those at like Christmas and shit. It's crazy, those M&M tubes used to last me like a month. They were replenishing and you shake them up and shit. It's crazy. Those M&M tubes used to last me like a month. They were replenishing. It was like pop one, like a tick tack every now and then. That's pretty good restraint.

And then I got these Nutella cookie crackers that were fucking crazy. Are they the sticks that you dip? No, they were like biscuits that had Nutella in the middle. And the texture is so unbelievable that I had to throw them out the window. I didn't litter, I just dumped the rest of the bag out for the moose. Are you serious?

Yeah, they don't have an issue with chocolate the way dogs do, so I wasn't worried about it. Yeah, they might think it's like deer pellets, though, or something like that, and think that the land has been claimed. True. You could have just fucked an entire ecosystem Have you ever seen the videos of the guys kicking over the like when people all stack rocks And they're like you leave like leave nothing untouched

I don't know what that's all about though because that's like an opinion that people are like die hard about like this fucks up the ecosystem Yeah, ruins like beavers. Yeah, and shit about it. They're like this fucks up the ecosystem, it ruins like beavers and gems and shit like that. There's people that like their mission on earth is to find every stack of rocks and destroy it. But they also they're like social media influencers so they'll like film themselves getting super angry and just like kicking over stacks of rocks. It's like a weird but it's's like, it'll literally be like four rocks, like this high. And they're like, why? Why have you done this? I think in the Andes Mountains,

no, excuse me, it's the Himalaya. There's a tradition that if you pass to the left versus to the right of a stack of rocks, it's really bad luck, right? You'll die on Everest, I think is that. Isn't that what they say? They got a lot of rules for like the Himalayas. No fucking on the mountains.

Is that a rule? Oh yeah. Really? It's bad juju. They definitely fuck at the base camp of Everest. Didn't Donnie say that it was a Boccanum? Yeah, but that's what the in into thin air Crackauer says that they're not they're not supposed to fuck on the mountain. It's against though. It's against the rules of the gods and

It's probably just because these Tibetan monks get no pussy. I know fucking jealous But apparently they all fucked and then a bunch of people died. Hmm, and they say that's why Well, I think it's just one of the suspicions they have a fun We've talked about this before on the podcast, and I don't remember it again, but there's a funny They have a funny name for it Mountain fucking they they called it like sucky sucky or something like that something funny We've ever seen the videos of it was the little guys who are just like No oxygen mask carrying a house on their back. Oh, yeah, the Sherpas who are just like no oxygen mask carrying a house on their back. Oh yeah. The Sherpas who are just like barefoot, just no shirt on.

Apparently those guys are like straight up like different, like they're just like... They, have you ever seen the 14 piece documentary? Yeah. They did like that test on that dude and it was like he's his ability. He was an anomaly among his own people. And they spawn from eggs too because no one can fuck on the mountain. I know. He's his ability. He was an anomaly among his own people. And they spawn from eggs too, because no one can fuck on the mountain.

I know. They're asexually hatched. They're hatched at the top of Everest. They're born from a, you start a snowball and you roll it down. Yeah. Smashes into a hut at the bottom, out comes a sherpa. The child born in snow.

Let me tell you the tale of the child born in snow. He came out of the womb with carrying all of the afterbirth on his shoulders. The first thing out of the womb was his crampons, piercing his mother's vagina. Sad and true. Sad and true, sad and true sad and true sad and true so fucking true Just touching on a lot of sad but true topics today. I heard a friend of mine has a young Like nine-year-old daughter, and they said all like the nine to ten year old like little girls All are like they all want an Asian guy.

They all want like, they want to marry an Asian guy because the movie Crazy Rich Asians has them thinking that all Asians are crazy and rich. What? All the little kids. Is that a kids movie? No. I feel like that just can't be a thing then.

I mean Our friend was like all her daughter and all of her friends like one of Asian guys so bad because the movie crazy rich Asians Just has them thinking that they're fucking loaded Hmm, so I'm a York thing Huh might be a New York thing. Yeah. Yeah Maybe I would be surprised. I mean, I don't know. Nothing wrong with Asian men. I mean, it seems like you're saying that there's something wrong with Asian men. I'm not trying to pull any love away from my Asian brothers. It seems like you're trying to find a reason why Asian brothers shouldn't be lusted at it. I'm just

saying, I don't think all nine-year-old girls are looking for Asian men right now. Well, who's more plugged into the nine-year-old girl community, dude? I have a source right at the mouth of the river and you're fucking, I mean, when was the last time you even talked to a nine-year-old? I don't know. You're just out of touch, dude. You're too old now. I'm out of touch. How does it feel being too old?

I don't know. I am out of touch. Eventually the game passes all of us, but hi, bro. Sass won't talk to nine-year-olds. No. What kind of shows- They'd be too judgmental of his apartment. Now my apartment's actually clean as hell right now.

Yeah right, show us a picture. Fucking vacuumed. You vacuumed the hardwood? Oh yeah, and the carpet. God damn. Have you guys ever even been over since I got the carpet? No, you won't let us into your home. I don't know, you have, because you broke in.

When I came and woke you up that one time, you did to me what you did to the five-year-old girl. You weren't allowed in, yeah. Yeah, you peered through the door. I locked the door. Which is fine, because at the time, I knew where my mother was. So it's fine for you to keep me in the hall.

But again, that kid knew where her mother was. No, she didn't. Yes, she did. She said she didn't. And children of that age are not capable of lying. They are not able. They have not learned the. I literally got the whole rundown.

She lied. Artifice at that age. She lied out of her ass. She probably would just have the door being like, where are the Asian men at? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

They're not Asian. Are you a fuckbuck? Are you either crazy rich or Asian? You're not crazy. It is great marketing for the Asian community. Like a movie called Crazy Rich White Boys would have us looking great. We need to come up with that.

We'd be so. I'm working on the script for that right now. Crazy Rich White Boys. that, yeah. We'd be so... I'm working on the script for that right now. Crazy Rich White Boys. Yeah, crazy, yeah. I would see it. We need all the good PR we can get. Crazy White Boys in New York. We never really talked about that whole thing with the kid.

I emailed my super, or my building. We talked about it on chat BCC, I think. I don't know if I ever gave the full rundown, but we gave the, we emailed, I emailed the, right after we filmed that episode, I emailed my building and I was like, just a heads up, this is what happened. This was yesterday, blah, blah, blah, whole thing. I made it very clear.

Did I tell you guys about this? That I was like, I don't, I was like, this isn't, I was like, just a heads up. This isn't a complaint. This isn't a complaint. I'm just letting you know in case like someone is looking for this kid, God forbid. And, uh... You guys know me. The last thing that would bother me is a five-year-old showing up. His kids and my dad.

It was actually a delight. In fact, if you have others sending come around, I just bought a bunch of toys. I do the guy... Put up some signs with the blue on them. The guy replied and was like, was like well this does bother me It's not not on the same page as me at all. He's like, thank you for snitching This was this was the person to whom you complained. I said hi blah blah blah blah blah Yesterday morning on 1030. I was sitting at my desk and a young girl probably three to five walked into my apartment

Ball blocks blame the whole situation. I just want to hear how you explained it to him she said she was trying to find her mom I told her I would go I would go find her mom and to wait outside my door while I grabbed my shoes but when I returned she was gone and taking the elevator and disappeared I went knocked on the super's door no answer blah blah blah I don't have any problems regarding the situation the kid made it back. The kid didn't bother me in any way. Again, I'm assuming the kid made it back

to her apartment fine, but I wanted to let you guys know in case, God forbid, this happened to be a bigger issue. Thanks. Thanks for your email. I'm not happy about this. That this should not happen again. A whistle blow. That's all?

Thanks for email. I'm not happy about this. He said, like, he said whose kid it was, but I didn't feel excited about that. That's smart. But it's one year building. He knew, he had an explanation for what had happened though.

Pretty much, yeah. He was like, it was definite. Cause remember I said there's no kids in my building? Yeah. So I guess there's one person who occasionally has a child in their apartment. A deadbeat mom. Well, I don't know about that, but. We're talking about a deadbeat mom here.

I will say I got home a couple of days later and the person was outside on the phone and they were talking. She was talking like one of her friends or something. She was like, I don't know what she was even doing on the second floor. She's never, I've never told her never to go up there. Are you serious?

I swear to God. I just kept my head down and kept walking. What? So you're snitching got, who'd you snitch to? Super? I snitched to the building. The building. The management company.

The management company. And then they kicked it to the super and the super kicked to the lady and the lady was calling someone. Something like that. Not knowing that it was. Tree and the bog and the bog down. to the super and the super kicked to the lady and the lady was calling someone. Something like that. Not knowing that it was... Tree and the bog and the bog down.

Yeah, pretty much. Hey ho, the redwood bog. But ever since then, I've just been paranoid as hell. Always locking my doors. Smart. Especially when I'm like showering and shit. I'm like, I feel like I'm gonna shower and I'm gonna look out and there's gonna be a kid standing outside the shower.

You should put a sign on your door that says, this apartment is not safe for children. Beware of dog. This apartment isn't safe for most people. 18 plus only. My owner has a gun. 18 or older. If I don't answer the door, I'm inside polishing my ammo. Reassembling my rifle.

Linefolders. Cleaning my rifle. Blindfolding my rifle. You ever see those like the doormats like shit like that? Yeah, they're so sick. You can get them for anything. You can really get them for any hobby. Francis, you should get one. At the course. Probably at the course. Guys, me, Harry and Rhone are all chatting with each other on a daily basis on ChatBCC. We've got our own very active,

very vibrant group chat. And now we are over 2000 members who are following along. I think that's one of the top three biggest chats in chat BCC history. That's right. We got passed by the fucking big brother one. We have to go. We have to attack big brother. Yeah. Really? Yeah. And then how do they have any?

I think one of the real housewives ones is also bad bullshit, but the survivor one is also bigger So maybe we're fourth. We're top for Harry we could You know, we got a it's all systems go here. I'm in the mix. I know it's so fun Yeah, Harry is it you get you get unfiltered Harry thoughts unfiltered Francis thoughts and I'm reading it like a motherfucker to every day every negative And someone says something negative about Harry Harry goes into the member chats and looks for negative comments about himself pins them on the wall is fucking motivation, but either way

That's a really fun thing that we're doing. We're interacting. We're having fun with you guys. It's been fun. I'm learning a lot I'm having conversations with people. I'm getting recipes. We're taking pictures of crispy potatoes. We're doing all kinds of fun stuff. Also just get in on the ground floor. It's so nice to be on the ground floor or something. Exactly. Exactly. Our early members, I can't say that there's necessarily a specific benefit, except that we just know you better. Okay? And you guys should get in with us. Well, we're hiring out of that group. Right. That's how Barstool is doing. They're hiring now. Whoever contributes the best in our chat BCC. Right.

We're looking for Harry's replacement since he's about to quit the podcast to go become a fisherman full time. To be an SB writer full time. Exactly. So download and join our chat. Go to chat, boydad.chat today, download the app and hop in there. And we got some fun trivia and some fun stuff going on. That's chat BCC.

Fuck yeah. I just got a note from chat BCC. Guys, we are big fans on this podcast of Viori. Okay, Viori clothing is absolutely spectacular. The shorts, Rhone is wearing Viori shorts. Lifestyle. You know, like, everyone's a fan of Viori. Yeah.

I was talking to my buddies the other day, and I told them that we were sponsored by Viori, and they were going nuts. Yeah, it's as good of a sponsorship as we could possibly get. Look at this secret pocket right here. Secret pouch. There's like this fifth pocket back here.

I find these shorts great to run in because they're snug enough that you could throw a phone in your pocket and it will count your steps still, but they're not smacking around your junk. That smack. Yeah, you don't want that smack. These are perfect for running. They're aerodynamic, they're like have futuristic fabrics.

Yes. It's the best. Their shorts, their core short is one of their marquee products. It's great for working out. It comes in three inseam options. The 357 and you can use that to blow up a watermelon. Yeah.

We're all big fans. Viori is an investment in your happiness. And for our listeners, they're offering 20% off your first purchase. Get yourself some of the most comfortable and versatile clothing on the planet at viuri.com slash boy dad. That's v u o r i dot com slash boy dad.

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All right, buddy. All right, guys. Can we talk about Sony Picture Classics? It's about time. Sony Picture Classics proudly presents Oh, Hi! The new comedy directed by Sophie Brooks and starring Molly Gordon as Iris and Logan Larman as Isaac- About their first romantic weekend getaway. Yes, exactly. As a couple that goes away. Or that goes-

Aride. Goes aride. Oh, now this has how my interest peaked. Convinced she's met her perfect guy, Iris goes to increasingly ridiculous and irrational lengths to prove Isaac that they are meant to be together, including chaining him to a bed. Oh my god, do not give away the plot.

I hate when I get too much of the plot. I know. This is a dark romantic comedy, all right? It takes on the highs and lows of modern dating in ways it makes us all a little crazy. Oh Hi has played to lapse. My guess is that they're, one is from Ohio and one's from Hawaii.

And it's like, Oh Hi. It's like Ohio, Hawaii, they're states or something like that. I like that, I like that. But they also say Ohai. Ohai contains one of the best comedy sex scenes to grace the big screen in some time. What? Now I'm hooked. See Ohai starring Molly Gordon and Logan.

Lerman. And Logan Lerman only in theaters on July 28th. Tickets are on sale now at ohimovie.com. That's O-H-H. And maybe July 25th. What did I say? 28th. That could be a five or an eight.

That's O-H-H-I, movie.com for more info. I gotta see that. Eight honestly could be a nine. The movie out of 10, definitely. Alrighty, let's talk about Netflix. I mean, we love Netflix. Happy Gilmore is returning to Netflix. Well, Happy Gilmore 1 is actually already back on Netflix, I believe. And I believe on Friday, Happy Gilmore 2 comes out.

I heard such good things about it. I've heard great things. Happy Gilmore is returning after 29 years. Adam Sandler is bringing his iconic and beloved character back to the screen featuring Julie Bowen, Christopher McDonald. They brought the gang back together. Benito Antonio. From the first one. The first one's one of the best movies of all time.

It is. If you like comedy and you're here, it's not of a boy that, you know. Julie Bowen too. Can't go wrong with Julie Bowen. She's a classic. She's an absolute classic. Modern Family.

Also features pro golfers, Rory, oh, Rory McElroy, Scotty Schauffler, and Brooks Koepka. And Bryson Dan, oh wow, there's a lot of golfers. Okay, Bryson DeChambeau, Justin Thomas. That's actually a lot of golfers. I wonder if that was fulfilling for Scotty. You have to hope. The scene of the movie on Netflix

definitely will be fulfilling for me. There's not a doubt in my mind. And you can go to your happy place on July 25th with Happy Gilmore 2 only on Netflix. Can't wait. Is that all or do we have game time? We have game time. Hey, can we talk about game time?

There's nothing like getting out to the ball game. No, there is not, especially last minute. Lucky for me I always use game time the official taking partner of Barstool Sports. The best. Game time makes getting tickets easier faster than ever. Prices on the app actually go down the closer it gets to Showtime. Showtime Otani. Showtime Otani. What have you been looking at for tickets? I'm looking right now. I'm on Grand Rapids. Oh. West Michigan Whitecaps. Tickets are 23 bucks. That's a steal. You can see the Great Lakes Loons for 12 bucks. Imagine being out at a loons game. 12 bucks. That's a steal to hit a loons game. What are you waiting for? I'm gonna go buy those loons tickets now with Game Time. You're the real loon if you don't use GameTime.

Take the guesswork out of buying tickets with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account and use code BOYDAD for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply again. Create an account and redeem code BOIDAD for $20 off. Download the GameTime app today. What time is it? GameTime. Good shit. Good shit. What time is it? Game time. Good shit, good shit. No, nowadays, you know, upstate, so the meat, the butcher shop that I go to, it's called Quatro's.

And it is under the same roof and connected to the gun store. Oh shit. So it's great. So like I go in, I get my ribeye, you know, they make these smoked rotisserie chickens that actually turn into some great chicken salad. So I get that some nice, you know, artisanal olive oil. And then I put that in a bag

and then I just bring it right into the gun store and look at pieces for a while. You pick anything out? There's a handgun. I mean, I'm thinking handgun, right? It's hard as fuck to get a gun in New York. Not upstate. I think it's still pretty tough.

Not the New York, you know. It's not New York City hard. But it's still gonna be hard. It's not an easy state to get a gun. Look, I live in God's country. Especially a handgun. Handguns are some states. I mean, I wouldn't bring it into the city.

Why not? I don't really come here that often. If you're gonna get a gun, the only reason to get a gun is to bring it into the city. Exactly, especially with fucking comrade Mamdani in here. Yeah. Ha ha ha. What kind of piece are you looking at?

Desi? Burner? You're going to scratch the serial number off? Some chrome. Looking at some chrome. You're going to get a chrome gun? Yeah, I want a chrome gun. That's crazy. A long, like no snub nose girl gun Beretta bullshit.

No. You need a fucking. I want to be able to light my cigarettes by directing the sun off my gun to the tip of the sig. Are you gonna get like a like a Glock or like a revolver? A revolver. You're gonna get a revolver. Yeah. This sounds like an awful idea.

I'm out. I'm out on the idea now. I want bullets to be the size of mini M&M tubes. Yeah. You need a varmintor for real. What you need is a Smith & Wesson 550. Ooh. Hand cannon. That's big time. Yeah, we call that a hand cannon. That's the one that the guy used to blow up the watermelon. The watermelon. And the watermelon's still flying through the

air. The pieces vaporize. Is that video not there? It's like one of the craziest things. Because you think it's going to like, you know it's gonna explode. You know it's gonna explode. You don't think it's gonna look like that. Have you seen this video? I don't think so. I think I've showed you this video. Dude, it's one of my favorite,

I watch it every once in a while. It's one of my favorite things I've ever seen on YouTube. It's one of the most outrageous videos. You just realize if someone shot someone in the head with one of those guns, like they wouldn't be able to have a funeral for that person. Oh no, close casted. There's no embalmer on earth who is a good enough at puzzles to put together. Yeah, you have to be disparate. And the watermelons are massive watermelons. They're like, they're like this big. They're like fucking those big ass pumpkins. Yeah. Look at this. In 44 Magnum.

What a beautiful revolver. Those bullets are fucking huge. My Anaconda kind of funny. It hates watermelons that's like 22 right the watermelons and he has destroyed i feel like that wasn't even the right one well i don't think that was the right one the one i've seen doesn't even matter. It's this one. It's this one. My revolver hates watermelon. This one vaporizes the watermelons. Ready? Oh, that one didn't go

That one they're gone. They're disappeared. I think that was it. I don't know. I remember them turning into dust What the fuck that's the 460 Magnum? Why did he gunbutt them afterwards? Why was he hitting them with the rising pistol whipping the watermelons after I don't know got must really hate watermelons I found the actual one. I'm not gonna show it because I don't know. God must really hate watermelons. I found the actual one. I'm not going to show it because I didn't realize how many there were, but it's the 500 Magnum is the one we're looking for. Yeah, what the hell man? You gave us the... Maybe just watch the 500. I gave you the mid one I think. Pull up the 500 really quick. Alright. Oh, he's holding it two hands. Oh no, he's just... That's it! That's the one!

Yeah, that's definitely the video. Holy shit! Dude, there's literally just zero remnants of them whatsoever. They're gone. All right, that video is called 500 Magnum verse watermelons and it's from hitchhawk 45 or Hickhawk that's my favorite one that video is 14 years old guess how many views it has 14 million 15 imagine being that dude just raking in money, just fucking shooting watermelons for like two minutes a year.

Passive income. How do you have this mansion? How do you have this lakefront mansion from the stock market? I love the idea of that guy having like a social media manager being like, did you, did you shoot vertical? He kind of does. All right, we're going to need to clip this for TikTok. But I think we should change this.

Like he kind of does and it's his son. His son's like, you know this. Oh, but I think we should change this. Like he kind of does. And it's his son. His son's like, you know this. Oh, yeah. Watch his videos all the time. All these dudes have their fucking son. There's like multiple people. He's got a whole range in his backyard. And he's and he'll he most of the range is made out of like cast iron pots. Yeah. And he'll be like, time to smoke some pot.

just made out of like cast iron pots. Yeah. And he'll be like, time to smoke some pot. He looks dead in the camera. Time to smoke some pot. And then he blows up the pans. You think he's got writers for it? Definitely. Same writers as Adam Friedland's show.

Does Adam Friedland show writers? Of course. One of our interns says they know the head writer for Adam Friedland show. Really? Sick. Yeah. Dude, I, this weekend, so I have this awesome electrician upstate because I finally decided to switch my gas lamps to electric.

I finally decided, you know what? I should probably modernize my home because there were You had gas lamps? There were risks of epilepsy. Epileptic people around gas lamps, that can somehow trigger seizures. And I haven't had a ton of kids at my house. I'm not like you.

But I do sometimes there are kids there. So I didn't want that. Yeah, I wanted them to be safe. And so even though I prefer the gas lamps, because it's rustic and all that I did decide to finally, well, you can have like a gas lamp shell. You have all gas. I did. I finally wired the home for fucking not electric. I think gas lamps is like usually people have like like one and they're like, yeah, look what we got. Well, it was in the bedrooms. It was in the bedrooms. Your whole house was being fueled by gas.

The lamps, yeah. Except for the car, of course, all electric. Right. The term gas lighting comes from some play about a guy who has to sneak into his attic or something like that. And the gas lights in his house keep on dimming, I think, every time he does that. Oh, yeah.

And then his wife's like, I think these are dimming. And he's like, no, they're not. No, you're crazy. Why don't you get some rest? I think you're acting a little bit crazy. No, I think you're just closing your eyes. Yeah, you blink. It's called blinking, honey. Is it your first time blinking?

You poor sweet dumb woman. Are you sure you're not dimming the lights? You probably dimmed the lights. Uh, so I switched them over. And this electrician, my guy Glenn, he's the fucking man. You had to hire an electrician to switch your light bulbs? Yeah, he had to fucking man to hire an electrician to switch your light bulbs. Yeah, he had to wire the house for for electric.

So your house had no electricity prior to this. How many times do I need to fucking tell you? Look, were you were you able to watch TV, gas powered TV, gas TVs, he was working the TV was not environment friendly. No, I did not have gas TVs. I my TV was hooked up to some pedals. Crank as I watched a couple couple dudes in the basement shoveling coal and I knew I Knew it was time for bed when I started slowing down and getting tired and like falling asleep TV would gonna go Alright started missing frames. I don't care enough about the Andy Griffith show

Love Island to keep pedaling to watch it. So I, anyway, he told me he played golf, right? Yeah. And I was like, oh, well, let's go play sometime. And he's like, oh, that'd be awesome. Like, cool. Is this the guy you found online? Like from via DMs?

I don't have the internet up there. So he just kind of walks around and you've waved him down. Word of mouth. He's like a guy that sells peanuts at a baseball game. Word of mouth. Electricity. He was referred to me by a very good friend of mine. A very special close friend.

Who had also just. Peters? Peters. No Peters. Peters is not. Where is Peters these days? Colorado. Yeah, he's in Rato. Yeah, he doesn't know any elections. Wyoming now. 2025. We're talking about shirts actually, making some shirts. Or hats at least. I know, we got get the shirts. It's probably too late. No, you can rush order. I already went in. I wanna make the shirts I wanted

that I suggested to the guys were, you know those, you ever go to a coffee shop where they have those shirts that say like, beans and drip and this and that. And it's all started with an ampersand. And it's like stacked. The Beatles shirts. I had, there's a place right by my apartment that does shirts.

Is it based on the Beatles? Yeah. Ringo and Paul. Yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, yeah. Ringo. So we were thinking. Ringo.

What accent is that? Bob Dylan. Have you ever heard that story? It sounded like a Guatemalan. Now it sounded like gringo. Gringo. What did Bob Dylan say? No, it's a dumb story. Continue. No, tell that. I want to hear. I'm curious. It's a foolish story and I've told it before on the

podcast and it's not even my story. It's a nor- it would be me telling a Norm Macdonald story that Bob Dylan told. So. All right. The box down in the value. So fuck me. Skip it. The shirt we're thinking of making is Bo and Peters and Francis and Nate. Yes. Harry. Well, you can only do four, so you'd have to probably cut off the end. Harry can be on the back. We know you don't like that stuff.

We know you don't like those. You want to do funny stuff. It actually is a great idea because tomorrow I get in before they do and I have to get in the rental car and picking them up at the airport. So it would be hilarious if I showed up in one of those shirts. Throw them on boys. Yeah. And had them draped over each one of their seats.

I mean, in reality, we should be doing son of a boy dad's t shirts that say Wyoming 2025. It's foolish that we're not. And just like bow and hit like could they sue? Yeah, I think that they would be pissed off if their name was on a shirt the same way they do was pissed off at that poker tournament. Can somebody please give me the rundown on the nidoo flight thing? I was so late to it. I missed it so much.

For the life of me I could, I tried to rewatch the act and I kept skipping around and I couldn't find the place to start. Yeah. I just saw him at a poker tournament and a guy's like, what dude, they're making money off of you and you should be fucking rich. And he's like, I know, I know.

That's like how it is. Listen, it sounded like my face on a I know. That's like how you're- Listen, it sounded like my face on a t-shirt. Yeah, have you ever talked to somebody like about, like about podcasting, about Barstool? That's like, like when you're like, they're like, they're like, you're getting all the money from ads, right? And you're like, well no, it's we get paid by salary. And they're like, dude, they're stealing from you. No!

It's like, well, no, we have the built-in fan base and we're also getting paid a salary. Yeah. Like, the ad revenue thing is... People think that we should be getting paid, like, people think that we get paid a salary and then get the ad revenue. It's like, well, where would the barstool money come in? The guy to Naidoo was literally like, They're making millions off of you!

He said millions. Dude! They're making millions off of you. He said millions. Dude, they're making millions off of him. He was telling other guys at the poker table that they were making millions off of him. More than once I've had a New York City or a standup comedian hit me up and be like, hey man, I'm thinking of like, coming to work for Barstool.

Oh yeah, yeah. You know, just wanted to ask about your experience. Like they'll be cool with me, like, you know, touring for three months in Australia, right? Like, cause I do that twice a year and like, I don't know, what do you think I should ask for? Like 200, 300 grand to start? And I'm like, buddy, yeah, bring all that to the table.

That sounds good. Yeah. It's a funny world. But someone did say to get the, I should get those WNBA shirts. Play us what we're owed. Play us what we're owed. So someone tagged us in it and said that we should have worn them today. That would have been hilarious.

That's funny. We need that guy as a writer for the show. Yeah, he's so good. That was probably Adam Friedland. I know. Top writer. That's fucking good. That is really good.

So fucking timeless. God damn it. Those WNBA bitches are being catty as hell. I don't know if you saw what Kelsey Plum was saying about her sister, Caitlin Clark. I don't know, that video keeps resurfacing of them at the All-Star Game. Kelsey playing defense on Caitlin Clark.

I still don't think that video is that insane. That's kind of grasping for anything there. Where she kind of almost assaults her. No, she's like playing defense. She picked up 94 feet. They're like, no one plays defense in the All-Star Game. Oh, I didn't see that I'm sorry. I don't think it's that but it is the Caitlin Clark stuff is kind of bizarre

They all hate her. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Because kind of like if like Sidney Crosby came into the NHL and they were all like fuck It genuinely makes zero sense. It makes perfect sense. I guess it's because the way that they see it. It's the way that they see it is that what, they're better than her and that like the league should have already been succeeding like this before she came into it. I would assume, right? It's like the most transparent jealousy of attention that's ever existed. Yeah, yeah.

I don't think you can make a case at their bed. But it's kind of like the McGregor like bring out the red panties thing, because it's like if you think like it's like if you find out you're playing against Caitlin Clark and then you go beat the shit out of Caitlin Clark, you know you're going to be on the front of ESPN for the next week. What's the bring out the red panties thing? You never seen that? The Conor McGregor?

No. And he's talking about the dude who booked like when Conor McGregor gets a fight, it's like he's doing the other guy a favor. Oh. And he's like, you get booked the Conor McGregor fight. You call her. He's like, call your wife. Bring out the red panties, baby.

We booked McGregor. You guys have never seen that? It's so funny. He is so funny. And it's a shame he had to do those awful crimes. Of having his penis out on the internet. Apparently people hate him in Ireland. Yeah, because he fucking...

Isn't there a story that he beat up an old guy at a bar? I think he's done that like 30 times. Like an old man at the bar and then he bought the bar so they couldn't sue him or something like that? Probably. And now that's like McGregor's bar in Ireland, so like Americans will go there and be like, we got to go to McGregor's and everybody's like, that's like the most heinous crime that was committed, like that he beat up an old man and then like bought this bar to turn it into a tourist trap to go wasn't he also found

guilty of rape He made a bar he committed this heinous act buying a bar I don't know. He was just, I mean, he can't have gotten canceled that bad because he was in the, that movie that, that, that premiere that I was at last year. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. That was after what was his big, uh, Oh, really? I believe it was after because he was at like a basketball roadhouse. It wasn't it. I don't know. I don't fucking know.

Oh, yeah, it was the bathroom of that. Arena, right? Yeah. Or something like that. Yeah. Yeah. Gilbert's Gilbert's Arena. Gilbert's Grape. Let me see that golf club. How about a fucking long drive competition, us three boys, so you can really fucking smoke that thing.

I mean, I'm going to just go ahead and skip on that one. Right off the bat. You're not strong enough to beat me. I would smoke you. Francis is the, but he would destroy us. Francis drives the ball like 500 yards. Oh. Is this true?

This is the first I'm hearing of this. Is this accurate? Like you hit the greatest shot you've ever hit and then Francis goes and he's like, he's like your max club length double. I love, this is fun. It's nice to be on the receiving end of SAS's exaggerations.

Well, he showed me how it's done. I mean, what's your longest drive? 350? I don't know. Look, that always depends, right? So wind behind, firm fairway. Let's say you're at the range. Let's say you're at the Chicago's in-house range.

They're simulated? Yeah. You got no wind. You got a perfect lie. I mean, if I was really, you know, if I had 10 balls and I was loose, I could probably hit one maybe 315 yard carry. Maybe not carry, I don't know.

I actually don't know the answer to that. That 310 maybe? My bad. Yuma. I think I could crack, crack 250. Easily. Yeah, for sure. I was just going like 230.

First time picking up the club in years. A couple of swings, a couple of practice swings, work the kinks out. Why not? Why not? Fuck it. Me and you, sass head to head. I played with them. No, just driving. Just driving? Yeahass head to head. I played with them.

No, just driving. Just driving? Yeah, just for distance. I played with my electrician. I don't know if I told you guys about this. Oh, so you made plans to play. You didn't tell us that you followed up. Well, I played with him. And he asked if he could bring his son. And I said, sure. Yeah, no problem.

And I'll be honest with you. I made some assumptions. How about Glenn's son? About Glenn and his son. Oh, okay. You thought they were gonna suck. Yes. And they're good. Bro, they were the two best people I've ever played golf with.

See, I'm thinking Glenn's a young guy. Glenn is 60, he's won his club championship three times. Jesus. And his son has won it twice. Damn. Between them, they've won it five times. And the first time his son won it was when he was 15 years old

and he took his dad to extra holes. That's crazy. His son is a scratch golfer. And honestly, I thought it was a sandbagging handicap. He is so much better than scratch. This kid, Kyle, holy shit, he's a Barstool fan so maybe he's listening to this. Kyle, if you're out there, I have never seen someone hit their irons the way that he does. It sounded like when you shoot the 550 at the watermelons. Him making contact

with a golf ball with like a five iron was the sound it makes when you make a watermelon explode Was he hitting blades? I think so we gotta put Let's put Kyle up against four plays best dude. These guys did not fucking miss Yeah, they were unbelievable and I was such I I was ashamed of myself being like well, you know My electrician, you know, hopefully, hopefully charity case, hopefully he knows golf etiquette. Maybe he can clean the soot off his face before he comes over. You didn't even like, yeah, you didn't even bring your full set.

These guys were- I just work on my short game. Un-fucking-believable at golf. Yeah. And it made me realize, first of all, I have wasted way too much money on golf over the years. Yeah. And- For Julia Gwyer, brother. You know, these guys, yeah, don't make assumptions.

You don't have to be a fucking billionaire to be beating people at golf. You know what I mean? I think if I had blades, I probably would have played better at the- Don't spoil it, bro. Well, I'm not spoiling anything. There was a... I just wanted to piss off Francis by saying... Sometimes there are these memes

on some of these funny golf accounts. About blades. Well, yeah, but like, there's a meme where it's like, when you know you're in trouble, because the guy shows up like with certain clubs. Yeah. Yeah. And it's like brand new irons or whatever. No problem.

Like the guy who's playing blades, but like doesn't deserve them. And then there's like the guy who shows up in like tattered clothing with 15 year old blades, but the ball mark on the center of the face has been there since like he's never missed this spot right here. And it's worn, like the grooves are worn down. Yeah, I see that.

And he's never changed his irons. And it's like, run for your life. That guy is gonna walk. And that's what these two, these guys- That's Kyle. Walked us off the course. That's Kyle and Glenn. That's crazy. How old was the son? How old's Kyle? Now I think he's in his mid twenties. Maybe I'll be friends with Kyle. That's Kyle and Glynn. That's crazy. How old was the son? How old's Kyle? Now I think he's in his mid-twenties.

Maybe I'll be friends with Kyle. We gotta get him on the pod for sure. Dude, Kyle hammers the wall. Was he a pretty good hang? They were great hang. They were fucking awesome. Would he fuck with Sass? Or would he be tired of Sass's shit? How is he at Halo?

I don't think he has time for video games. Focusing on his goal. Is he trying to like go pro? No. Like Scottie Scheffler? It's probably not a great time. He was going to play in college and then I think he kind of got screwed by like a recruiting issue with the coach. Scheffler could be goat. Scheffler's probably the goat. If he doesn't fall into the Tiger Woods pitfall of whores, he could wind up being the goat. I mean, let me tell you, he's knocking on the door, that's for sure. Something's got to fill that void. What?

Oh, for him? Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's either going to be... But those are the guys who are awesome at everything. He's got two routes right now. Robin Williams. It's either get even better at golf and genuinely become the greatest of all time or whores and drugs.

Yeah, he has a hole in his heart that is like. And it's unrepairable. Can I say that I listened to that full press conference? Yeah. Probably three times. Oh yeah. And it's, I'm not exaggerating, it's my favorite thing I've ever heard an athlete say.

Yeah. I've never, I hate to say, let's put it this way, I've never aspired to relate to something more. Yeah, yeah. But he also, he's probably hearing all the people relate to it, and he's probably like, oh no, like, I'm talking about me. Like, you guys haven't accomplished anything.

I just won four majors. Yeah, he's the top of the world. Yeah. Yeah, he is. And like, your local electrician's like, he's the top of the world. Yeah, and yeah he is and they like your local electricians Like that's my fucking life Fuck that's me. It is pretty crazy. This is so true that he won the tournament after that press conference He win a job. I mean, yeah, it was it was a fucking after that that

That approach shot that he had on the 18th hole was so sick Oh, yeah, I loved his approach. But it was very compelling to listen to. I thought it was amazing because he was trying to figure out how to articulate how he felt, and he wasn't entirely sure how to voice it. Well, he's depressed. Yeah, he has depression.

You think? Absolutely. That's like the definition of it. I thought he just was unfulfilled. Maybe that's part of it. I think he's saying, I think what he was trying to say is that like, that golf isn't the only thing in the world for him. Yeah.

I think he was kind of like, why doesn't this make me happier? Because he got depression. It probably sucks if you're one of those dudes that like is like close to winning it. You know it's fucked up. And then you're just hearing that dude being like, it's not even that good. I had that thought. I'll take it. Fuck you.

I had that thought where like there's so many guys out there who are like, if I won it just one time, my life would be complete forever. It's like dude, just roll out on the 18th on purpose. If you don't care, take the win. And then he beat that guy by 30 strokes. Yeah, yeah. And he's like, I know how this is for me. Two minutes, my two minutes of happiness are up.

All right, back to fucking- Watch for dinner. Yeah. Back to dragging cops through the street. That's unfortunate the only thing that brings me joy anymore is just seeing a police officer like he's a can tied to a freshly married couples car golf just doesn't do it anymore. Rattling her along, hanging out. You say you say newly married. Yeah, yeah.

Cans. Cop. I'm conscious dangling. He's really good at basketball. Have you ever seen him play? I'm sure he's good at everything. Playing basketball. That's another sign of depression.

People who are just good at everything. He's probably he seems like he's actually athletic. Like he's not like, yeah, he's not like, like it just like one of those dudes that's just really good at golf that that thing in the quarterback, I started watching quarterbacks because you guys told me when Joe Burroughs parents are talking about how you we weren't sure if he was gonna go Division one in basketball or I guess football that kind of came out of nowhere. Yeah, it's like you

were that good at basketball as a white kid. There's a lot of people. You like last minute decided to become a quarterback. I'll just go number one overall in the NFL. He's fucking nuts, dude. We had a, or Drake May played. Drake May was sick at basketball. You ever seen his highlights?

Yeah, so was the Eagles guy. The- Cooper DeGene. Cooper DeGene. Probably all of them, realistically. Yeah, there's, I mean, have you ever seen Tom Brady shoot a basketball? It's like the purest shot ever. It's fucking amazing.

And he's like six, five. Like Tom Brady could have easily been Khan Canupel or whatever. Tom Brady could have gone to Duke and been a shooting guard. I have a Tom Brady slow as shit. Yeah, but some of these basketball players slow as pro. True, true. I guess like, yeah, Shaq wasn't that fast. He's slow as shit. Yeah, but some of these basketball players slow as pro. True, true.

I guess like, yeah, Shaq wasn't that fast. I don't think Pau Gasol has beaten too many people in a 40. Yeah, but Brady's like, like Brady's like slow. But some of the, did you ever see that dude, Josh McCown? He was a quarterback and he was like old as fuck. And then one season his team was out of wide receivers. So he just like played receiver and he was sick. He runs like a 5-2 and he just was

like routing dudes up because of suddenness. I think suddenness is really everything. Routes are the name of the game. I want to see Tom Brady's max speed. Speed is so overrated unless you're like racing against iShow Speed it doesn't matter at all. I was gonna say are you talking about i I show at 46 he ran a 518 and a 512 Where was this juice times the 2000 oh wait In 2000 he ran a four to everyone who ran a 528 When he was drafted so at the combine you ran a 528 and then since then he's clocked a 518 and a 528 when he was drafted. So at the combine, he ran a 528.

And then since then, he's clocked a 518 and a 512 at the age of 46. Wow, kinda like faster. So he's gotten faster. Yep. But still, he's pretty slow. Well, he should. He better get faster.

I went and saw F1 last night. He was faster than me, by a lot. Did you guys see F1? No, I haven't seen it yet. It's a movie? Yeah, it's the Brad Pitt. I heard it was great. You didn't like it? It was good.

I mean, it was the worst writing I've ever heard in my life. Really? Almost like I'd rather watch this movie without dialogue. I heard it was, Fights told me he saw it like three times or some shit. Fights is, I'm'm gonna be honest with you He's got some interesting movie takes his taste is like How do I put it It's it's like he's living in a bunker and all he has for entertainment our movies

But that's because he's like super into movies like he's like perpetually on a 16-hour flight and he's like He's like a he has like a theater on a 16 hour flight and he's like, yeah, what else? He's like a theater, he goes to the theaters like multiple times a week. I know, he hasn't gotten that thing that so many of us have developed, which is the loss of attention span as a result of multiple stimuli.

Yeah. Where at this point, for a movie to hold my attention for two hours, it has to be, you know. It's gotta be good. The Dark Knight or something like that. Seeing movies three times is nuts. I mean, yeah. I thought it was good.

In theaters? I thought the scenes were good. The driving scenes were amazing. But Brad Pitt, like, you know, Brad Pitt's acting, Brad Pitt is a great actor. And I think throughout his career, he's shown a lot of range from Fight Club to Benjamin Button to 10, 20 years, seven years in Tibet to-

12 years of slave. All these- He played the black guy. He was in 12 years of slave. Yeah, 14 monkeys or whatever. Doesn't he play the good guy in 12 years of slave? Yeah, he's the guy who- Let's him down. Passes the word back that this guy's been a slave

for the last Aldo Rain. 11 and three quarters years. Ocean's 11. Yeah. I just rewatched Ocean's 11. So good. I mean, it doesn't get much better.

I watched it for the beginning on TNT with commercials. And it was so, I needed the commercials cause I was like, what just happened? Commerced dude, watching a movie with commercials, not as bad as that. It's very nice. Cause you're just like, Oh, and then I can tap back in. Of course. Yeah. But, uh, I thought that this movie didn't do a ton to utilize Brad Pitt's acting abilities. It almost like handcuffed him a little bit.

I'm actually tired of- No, don't say that. Is Pitt rinsed? Do not say he's rinsed. People are talking. No, they're not. He's chopped and rinsed. People are saying that Pitt might be done. That he's chopped, that he's actually ugly as fuck right now. I mean, if- He looks amazing, obviously.

He's lost it. He's like the millennial ideal of a hot guy more than anybody else. Right. His outfits in this movie are beyond belief. I loved his clothing so much. I loved it. I think millennials idea of a hot guy is Brad Pitt.

I think Generation X's idea of a hot guy is Dave Beckham. I think Gen Z's definition of a hot guy is Dave Beckham. I think Gen Z's definition of a hot guy is Timothee Chalamet. Who else am I missing? I think like a Baby Boomer's idea of a hot guy is what you guys thoughts on Pascal, Pedro Pascal. People glaze him. They're like, he's so nice.

I like him. Why don't I like him? I don't know. I don't know if I don't know. I don't know what my thoughts are on him hmm that everybody likes him so fuck him he's a little much for me he's in too much he's over exposed a little much for me he's like overexposed I also just kind of him like don't believe I think he's kind of like he's fake he's like he's kind of fake he's a Hollywood phony bro how old

is Pedro his Pedro Pascal 50? Probably there. He probably had some dark years in there Yeah, 50 on the dot Yeah, he probably had some very dark times early on in his life. What was he doing before he was before he blew up? Because he just blew up over the last however many years And then at the beginning of the last of us he's playing like a 32 year old. Mm-hmm Well, cuz now he's like jacked like indie Steroid monster like cool Johnny. Yeah paint snails Paint snails paint snails in his free time. That's snail racing

gambles on snail racing Have you guys ever watched have you guys ever gone down the YouTube rabbit hole with just the marbles racing? Yeah, it's so good. It's great. Me and my friends used to watch that all the time. That's all there was during COVID. They're really fun to watch. Great videos. Because they're like, how did Blue win?

Oh, they're like, the guys got like multiple angles set up and shit. It's the natural progression of, what are those machines called? Yes, the the yeah, I'm ball machine were were Lee Steinwitz Machine something like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh look at you guys ever fuck with Hot Wheels. I Was more of a matchbox car kind of guy. I Was more than a matchbox 20 guy Rob Thomas. I Was a big that was a big Hot Wheels guy Racing the Hot Wheels guy. Racing

the Hot Wheels was always fun because there was always like, it was pretty obvious. I had never had a good enough track. Like I watch a commercial and there'd be sick tracks and I'd have like a bitch ass fucking slow track. I just had a straight one. Just a straight shot. Yeah. Easily the best way to race. No loop. No. When I saw the loop in the commercial. Rube Goldberg. Yes. We couldn't afford the loop when I was growing up. Yeah, me neither. My dad said maybe next year. My dad made a homemade loop out of tin foil.

He's crafting it. It's just as good. Those things always broke though. Someone would come over and just snap the track in half. Step on the car. Some bad kid. The softest plastic too. If you left it in the sun it would melt. Yeah, one of the neighbors kids. The worst. Come over, shit all over it, break it, puke. Wipe their grilled cheese hands all over it. Some juice mouthed fuck. When I was like really young, like a child, it was Christmas morning and I remember we had one of my friends growing up, lived like right down the street,

and like I would go walk down to the bottom of the street and say hi, and I went down on Christmas like afternoon to see what kind of toys he got. And he had like a, he got like a remote control like helicopter, styrofoam. I broke it immediately. Oh no. I don't think I've ever felt that bad in my entire life.

On purpose? No, but it's like Christmas morning and I'm like, oh, what's this? Snapped it in half. Like it was made of, it was literally made of styrofoam. I know that toy. Yeah. Well, that's what they used to be like. Right. That toy might suck ass. It used to just be a styrofoam. I know that toy. Yeah. Well, that's what they used to be like. Right.

That toy might suck ass. It used to just be a styrofoam with a battery in it and a propeller. I remember I used to do Kuman. Oh, yeah. The tutoring? Did you do Kuman? No, my little sister did, though.

Yeah, I had to do Kuman. And depending on the number of points. What is it? It's like a tutoring program. It's math, specifically math. Oh, I see those all over the city. It's spelled very unfortunately. K-U-M-O-N. K-U-M-O-N, yeah.

Yeah. What is that? Unfortunately. Come on. Come on? Come on. Come on now? I used to do come on.

Yeah. I did come on. I did come on math. And how long has come on been around? A long time. I didn't know that. I think it's like. I think it's Japanese or it's Korean or something.

I mean, it's been around since, you know. It's got like the cool. The emperors. Yeah, since Alibaba and the 40 Thieves. Exactly. So I used to do that and it was like, if you finished a number of worksheets or whatever, each time you finished a worksheet, get a token.

Yeah. And then at the end of a certain, depending on how many tokens you had, you could get prizes, there were thresholds. You got like a Chinese finger trap. Yeah, it wasn't much, but they did have this one airplane. It was one of the ones with the propeller

where you wound it around a rubber band and then you let it go and theoretically, the propeller would spin for a bit, so it should work. I worked, I did so many worksheets. And it never worked. I got so many tokens and I finally got that airplane and I wound it up, I assembled it and I let it go and it broke.

Yeah, shit breaks, it sucks. It was made of paper and sticks. Yeah. That's such bullshit. What was the last time you got something that was like you were looking forward to it? Got it, sucks. It was made of paper and sticks. Yeah. That's such bullshit. What was the last time you got something that was like you were looking forward to it? Got it broken. The last, I mean, twice in my life,

I got, one year I got fencing swords that my parents bought from- Foils? Maybe, they were like plastic. They- No, but that's what they're called. They're called foils. Oh yeah?

Fencing foils, yeah. Yeah, Yeah, and they were like secondhand fencing Fencing swords and I fucking tried to fence with my sister and I think I like smacked the fuck out of her She ran in crying We immediately got the fencing swords taken away and the exact same thing happened when I first got a knife My sister like cut her hand on the knife and was like I can't have the knife anymore We were gonna get Pokemon cards one day and I bit my sister. Pokemon cards were cancelled. Well you were 21 at the time.

I was probably like five. I remember it very vividly. Having a biter is is tough. I wasn't even a biter. I think I just got in a fight with my sister and bit her. Sounds like you were a biter is tough. I wasn't even a biter. I think I just got in a fight with my sister and bitter Sounds like you were a biter, but I never did that like I wasn't something I would usually do I think it's like a defense tactic. There's no way it was defense. I guess you were on the Close was over, still, still underground. So I looked older, till you came around I was only falling one way

I was only falling one way Days were drifting For was I So, so then you listen Now I come alive I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way

Fetish drew your eye Did you realize No one could take me alive I was only falling one way See you just a distant light