Son of a Boy Dad - Feitelberg | Son of a Boy Dad #186

Episode Date: March 28, 2024

Feitelberg | Son of a Boy Dad #186 -- Ad: NETFLIX | THE GENTLEMEN LIKE IT WHEN YOU WATCH. https://www.netflix.com/title/81437051 -- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. All right, let's start. All right, welcome back to the Son of a Boy Dad podcast. Today it is March 27th. It is 3.30 p.m. We are here live From HQ3 with

John Feidelberg, hello, welcome Thank you very much for having me, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to sit How does Francis I thought that looked nice I feel like I looked a little too casual Don't base it on Francis You can be as casual as you want It's a very casual podcast

Is this your podcast voice? I can't say, I don't know I think that's how i always started out yeah francis wishes he could dress like you brother francis actually told me the other day he's like you're you're dressing better and better lately i was like thank you very much francis yeah francis loves to comment on what other men are wearing i did i can't hate on that dude i've been getting annoyed as fuck with what people say about my outfits. It's either like you look like you just crawled out of a homeless shelter or it's like, oh, Sass looks like he just raided his dad's closet.

It's like, what do you want me to fucking wear? You're dressing better. I'm wearing, this is a normal outfit. That's what I wear every single day. Yeah, it is very normal. It's a complete, I'm wearing jeans, a shirt, and a jacket. I think you look nice. a shirt and a jacket i think you look nice but they know but people in the comments will be like oh so that looks like he's about to go uh protest against fucking homeless people or some shit i

can see that it's always this looks very much like a dad where like affordable housing is moving into the neighborhood no yeah i don't know what the alternatives to wear on like it's not you're not protesting but you'd be at like a city council no this is crazy i don't know what else to i literally have dressed the exact same my entire life and it's like sometimes i'll wear a collared shirt sometimes i won't you have two seasons a collared shirt it's he's protesting against affordable housing and if it's not it's he just looks like he just crawled out of a homeless shelter it's your you have your north face hat season and the the rest of your seasons someone commented yesterday on the fucking out of order and they were like sass couldn't or today i guess they were like sass

couldn't even fix his hair for the character my hair looked completely normal i think you looked what was wrong with my hair i know i had gel in already i couldn't double gel double gel would be crazy double gel would be a layer of wax over my hair your hair goes one leg too it's fine you have one speed hair i actually have an article of your clothing at my apartment and there's no way there is yeah there's i promise you you don't it's a bill sweatshirt it's not mine then it's it's 100 why the fuck would you have somebody else's bill sweatshirt you's not mine then it's it's 100 why the fuck would you have somebody else's bill sweatshirt you're the only person that wears a bill sweatshirt oh you know maybe i think it was

someone sent me it and we used it for a sketch it's pretty old and ratty i don't it's definitely not mine okay i dude i have the amount of clothes that i have i'm not leaving clothes anywhere and not following up immediately to get them back i've always assumed it was yours and and someone was over this weekend they were like they're like this isn't yours like you really get like stuck out in my yeah in my apartment being like what what is this it's is it shitty or is it like cool vintage it's cool it's it's torn apart but in a cool way yeah no i've only got two bill sweatshirts and they're both accounted for i know where they're at and they're both at my house on the floor tracking devices on those bad boys whatever small-minded people talk about what people wear big-minded people talk about ideas and huge-minded

people talk about fucking help me out here brother finish land the plane all i know is that you could come in here wearing a full-on suit like a herb brook suit and no one would even comment about it and then i could be wearing like a t-shirt that day i'm like where'd you get that t-shirt the fucking salvation army fucking homeless pig i think people are just have a fascination about you and uh they don't get enough of you which i think is something you've done well is you've created a scarcity of yourself there's like a lit just a finite amount of little sass in the world and people want it people want to grab it how it should be strongly agree with that oh yeah we're an oversaturated bunch over here we're just dump oh i think it's the the pure narcissism the unbridled narcissism of thinking that the world

always needs more of you. Oh yeah. It was a crazy thing to think, but there was a time in my life where I was like, if I stopped tweeting so much, what are they going to do? He tweeted in four hours. Bro, there was a time where I was like,

I was like, if I don't tweet first thing in the morning people won't know i'm awake yeah yeah i used to be like that like i yeah i was like that for a while it was for a while i was like if i don't tweet for a day people are gonna think i'm dead like but it was probably true yes that because i was tweeting so much that if i didn't tweet for a day something probably bad happened that's what i want i had to get away from that where i was just like was it job accountability or just like the self-absorbed thought of just people people need to hear what i'm saying or i need to get or is it just like i need to get a shot up for the day i need to start getting my shots up because the longer you

wait the more pressure there is on your first shot that's true but i like to think it started as job accountability like i just had to like show dave i was up and yeah yeah yeah and then it definitely became self-absorbed like i like to think it had uh uh conception yeah in like a a valid place and then it became pure narcissism the the worst is when you would like wake up a little bit unseasonably early and so you'd have to get one off before you're out of bed just to like prove to the world that you were up and oh yeah i'm a fucking productive member of society at 8 30 i'm still drunk but even if you like prove that you were up at eight o'clock or something like that, there's

always somebody who's, there's always Captain Cons who's like, I was up at fucking 5.30. Yeah. Chief or someone. Well, it's always people with kids. Dogs. That doesn't count. It doesn't count waking up early if you have kids. Or if you were ever in the armed services or whatever.

Like you're just scared that you're going to die or something like that. Yeah, exactly. You're going to get chewed out. Or if you take a nap. You're going to get chewed outside. Yeah. If you take a nap if you take a nap it does not

dude my dad would always be like I was up at 4 o'clock this morning and you'll be asleep on the couch at 3 dude oh yeah when I'm up I'm up for the day bro that shit drives me nuts

the shit where people it's like that's like the whole like those like Instagram billionaire mindset people who are like oh I wake up at 4am and it's like

yeah you go to bed at 7 yeah right you're missing half the day like there's nothing in prep you're still sleeping as much as i'm sleeping you just have worse hours yeah yeah you're missing the prime making these videos people will be like oh that something's wrong with that guy people will be like yes he has a fucked up sleep schedule he's manic yeah i don't know what what it is about the early morning that people kind of feel like they're they need to own the day or that is like this mark of – I guess it's just the suffering of having to depart from sleep that you're like leaving sleep behind.

Like that sucks. So like people feel like they did something hard and they want like a badge for it or something. Oh, yeah. There is a niceness to – I appreciate being up. To me, it doesn't matter what side of the day it's on, but I like being up when no one else is up. I'm typically the other side of it where it's like 4 a.m. Yeah. Where you get that – that's the only time I can enjoy things.

Yeah, me too. With a phone, I always feel like I should be doing something else. But from midnight to 7 a.m again for whatever reason i'm up either side of it it could be either either end i'm like this is my happy place yeah i'm the same way 3 a.m i won't even go to i'll stay awake longer just to be like i'm gonna go on my phone for even longer now yeah because i'm having so much fun i'm gonna beat you all i'm gonna beat everybody to beat everybody who's going to sleep. Yeah.

You weaklings. I love to watch a movie. I love to wake up. If I wake up early for some reason, throwing on a movie, that feels like stolen time. Getting a movie done by 9 or 9.30 or something like that. I do it every morning. You watch a movie every morning? I started sleep taping. So I wake up earlier now.

I tape up the mouth. That's crazy. I don't understand that at all. I would now. I tape up the mouth. That's crazy. I don't understand that at all. I would die if I tried to do that. No, dude. Francis does it too. It's lunatic. It is.

I did it because I'm such a snorer, and I'm sure I read the book that Francis read as well, Breathe. And it's just like, it's life-changing. I actually don't really find it that life-changing, but I almost find it as like a, like it makes me fall asleep. When I put tape on my mouth, it's like my body knows like, go to bed now. It's because you're passing out. Yeah, you're suffering. You're chloroforming yourself. You're literally dying.

I get up at like 7 a.m. now. And I don't have anything to do. I have no one I have to answer to. So first thing i do every morning is watch a movie watch kong scott skull island yesterday i said i like to start with an action movie yeah that's the whenever you see me the kind of energy i'm walking around with is like i watched an action movie this morning instead of having coffee yeah i'm the same way i do that i i wake up and i like think it's like i'm being productive like i'll get out of bed at

like nine and then i'll just sit on my couch and watch YouTube videos for three. I watched an hour and a half podcast this morning. Just front to back. The Bonfire. Nice. Yeah. Nice.

A new one or a classic? A new one. Nice. With Kelly? With Bobby Kelly? Bobby Kelly. Yeah. Yeah.

Fuck yeah. Yeah. Isn't that a serious show? I didn't know it was a podcast. They put out some of the interviews on yeah. Fuck yeah. Yeah. Isn't that a serious show? I didn't know it was a podcast. They put out some of the interviews on YouTube. Fuck yes. Good interview? Yeah, Shane.

I had to show my support. He needs all the support he can get right now. From you. Yeah, from me and the other 20 million people. And how will people know if you didn't talk about it? You need to let people know but go out and buy his tickets yeah seriously go check out his shows i bought tickets to shane's show this weekend did you really yeah because i sent him a text asking for him he didn't reply so i bought them and they

were expensive damn he told me how much he paid for them and i was like i think shane would be mad i didn't want to be like oh my god double like when you went in Baltimore did you pay for them we had like a big group so I think I paid for like half of them and I like got like a couple of them for free like I paid for like six of them his group is four people and you paid for all of them yes

obviously four figs oh yeah yeah mid four figs what it's a smaller venue two grand a ticket that's diego's salary no it wasn't two grand no it's two grand total it was total it was it's just because i think it's a rescheduled show so it's a smaller venue than he it's also it's a small venue than he should be doing but it's a it's not a small it's a three thousand person it's just the way theater it's a big but my buddies who i'm going with texted me and he's like because he doesn't really like

he thought doesn't know comedy like or does not know it but isn't as immersed in it as we are right and he's like is bargazzi that because bargazzi was in boston this weekend and he's like is bargazzi that much bigger than shane that because bargazzi did two sold out at dd garden yeah he did a 3 p.m. show there. Really? On Sunday. So maybe he did more than two. I just assumed he did two nights if he's doing days. I think he would know. I think he just did Sunday.

Oh, he just did the one? I think he did 3 p.m. and then like a night show too. Oh, okay. I see. I think. I'm not positive. The text, I didn't know. The text said he did multiple sold out at TD Garden.

And I was like, fuck, I didn't even realize. And he did the round. Like dead center. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he did the center stage like time he does these like stages like the size of that fucking table right there because he wants to he gets like the capacity record oh and just get like people sitting on each other's laps like as close to you as possible like when we saw when we went to or i guess i mean you went we didn't go together but you went to that p davidson 9-11 yeah yeah like that was like the back the back

of msg was completely empty right because they have the stage at the end right some people do that when they do the center they can fill the entire arena and they can fill the floor seats how do you even do that you just stand on a carousel and get rotated to everyone do spin really yeah that's a real thing some of them spin what the fuck who spins some of them bill burr had a story about like the only time he's ever uh gone up drunk was it was a spinning a spinning thing and he said it was like it was fucking him up so much because he was drunk doing jokes and then also he's meanwhile he's just rotating like without moving the whole time imagine having to do crowd work and then having to spot someone like a figure skater it would be funny if it malfunctioned and it's just

you firefighters to come in and save you from your stage so bar goss he he he sells that much more like it's i think he has the record i don't i don't know bridge stone bridge stone yeah yeah the record because i was i was doing Zany's when he did it. Oh, really? Yeah, and I was at a bar. We were at a rooftop bar during the day, and you could see the traffic for his show, like backed up like miles down Nashville.

And there was these two guys, and they were up there at the rooftop, and they were like these two gay dudes wearing Speedos. And they were like, what is all this traffic for and i was like oh i think it's like a comedy show and they're like oh that guy on tiktok and they're talking about mad rife and i was like no and i think i was like no mad rife could never and now it's like he probably could do bridgestone six times and sell it out definitely could you see he's he's the youngest comedian to ever sell out like the la Forum at some certain time.

I don't know. He posted a record that he had. Now, that sounds a lot like NFL records, though. Yeah. He's like the youngest first-round draft pick after the fifth pick under six feet to have 2,300 yards in the whole season. Every single play in the NFL is some sort of new record. Wow. Christian McCaffrey, the first person to have over 50 rushing yards when it's only 43 degrees yards and every single play in the nfl is some sort of new record wow christian mccaffrey the

first person to have over 50 rushing yards when it's only 43 degrees outside in san francisco that's crazy yeah as a white guy he's gonna want to take that game ball home after this mccaffrey is my favorite player to watch only because of the the twitter video that everyone tweets every time he runs of stone Cold in The Longest Yard. I don't think I've seen that. I've seen The Longest Yard, the one with Adam Sandler. Yeah, but when Stone Cold, like, I don't know, in the final game has some run and he just looks at the sidelines and goes,

that's how a white boy runs. That is amazing. Dude, you know, we're about to get a new white boy cornerback in this year's NFL draft. Really? A first-round pick cornerback. This dude from Iowa. This dude, Cooper DeJean. He's like this-

A what boy? A white boy. Cooper DeJean? Yeah, Cooper DeJean. Believe it or not. I don't know if that sounds too white to me. He sounds like he's from the bayou. Cooper DeJean.

He's from low country Louisiana, but this is like a white boy who has like a fucking incredible, like he's just insanely athletic. He went to Iowa, but he like returns punts, has a beautiful body. Are the Eagles going to draft him? I want them too badly. He must not be a high pick if you know this guy. What do you mean?

Well, I'm only focusing on the first three picks. Because the Patriots need a quarterback, and you guys are. Yeah, you're focusing on corners. Yeah, because we have our quarterback. We don't need a fucking. I don't know about that. You got your quarterback for now. I was going to say, you said that confidently like it was nine months ago.

You got your quarterback like the Cowboys have their quarterback. Bro, stop this. Stop this madness. He had 38 touchdowns last year. Mac Jones hasn't had 38 touchdowns in his career. Mac Jones has. I don't care about Jacksonville Jaguars back at QB. Who cares about him?

You guys are going to draft fucking Drake May, and you're going to fucking like it. I don't watch any college football so i have no idea what i'm talking about but i do know i want jaded daniels yeah me too i've been watching all the tape i've been watching i don't i didn't watch any college football either but i've watched all their highlights because you boys have never known the joy of having a black quarterback yeah yeah no i have dude michael bishop oh yeah bishop brissette was brissette uh brissette had a couple preseason games Michael Bishop

The Hail Mary specialist Was Bro there was a time Probably like 2000 2001 If you asked 12 year old me Like do you want Tom Brady Or Michael Bishop

I was like Fucking ship Brady Yeah Give me the video game guy Give me the Kent State guy Yeah he can just roll out And fucking launch bombs Michael Bishop was the best

Having a black quarterback Is infinitely more fun. I mean, if your quarterback is great, but if he's not Tom Brady or like Patrick Mahomes or something like that. Patrick Mahomes isn't white. Dude, if we get Jaden Daniels. Not if you ask the black community. If we get Jaden Daniels,

has anyone rebranded faster than New England Patriots did? Black head coach, black quarterback. We went from being the MAGA team, the white supremacist team. We had white wide receivers, bro. Yeah. Now you're fully Antifa. Now you guys are fucking. It would be a crazy rebrand.

Burn it down the police station. Dude, deep on the police jerseys. Fuck yeah, man. That would be fucking sick. I would be happy with Drake May, Jayden Daniels, or Michael Penix Jr., but... J.J. McCarthy then. No, J.J. McCarthy, I would...

J.J. McCarthy, I just wouldn't watch football this year. J.J. McCarthy would be crazy. People are saying that he's going to go a lot higher. They're saying he's going to go second now. He went for plus 2,200. Did he throw five passes a game? Yeah, people are saying that they're hyping him up now. Apparently his odds to get picked in the first round went from plus 1,200 to plus 200.

400. No, plus 400. Plus 400. It went from plus 2,200 to plus 400. Yeah, in the last day. Dude, again, I watched, I think, two Michigan games this year, maybe three. All you got to do is look at J.J. McCarthy and know he's not going to be good in the NFL. Well, he did beat depression.

He beat depression, which is tougher than any defender. Just by Googling it. Yeah. But I was grinding some tape of one of the Michigan receivers, dude, and McCarthy pops out on tape. Dude, you guys will be all right getting McCarthy. I think he might be nice. We don't want McCarthy?

Yeah, because you don't want to wait. Yeah, no. You want to just try it out. I don't want to't want to wait you're like a white girl going to college let me just try out with a black guy well you just don't want another fucking zach wilson or mac jones bailey zappy yeah all these failure white quarterbacks and they all look they like all drake may jj mccarthy they look exactly like all of those guys what do you mean white white same fucking baby face same what kind of face do you want tough came out of the project what's a what's like a no what's an example of a white guy that doesn't look like

the rest of those dudes like what's a white guy face that you want tom brady what are you talking about he's baby faced and fucking what what do you mean? Yeah, not even close. Young Brady. Young Brady looked like Drake May. Before he had the buccal fat removed? No, that was because Tom Brady was ugly back then. That makes it better. We don't want one of these hot young dudes.

So when Carson Wentz came out, he was ugly. Yeah, you want an ugly guy who's from the middle of fucking nowhere. But there's like... I actually talked about this recently. There was a... This is an article from a while back but it was about the um what do you call this the uh symmetry but the symmetry of the faces of quarterbacks yeah basically a study to find out if football coaches just pick the hot guy to put him in quarterback oh absolutely yeah and it was like

let's let i'm gonna make up numbers but the ratio is gonna be fairly accurate where it's like say the average face is 94 symmetrical yeah the average quarterback's face is 99 symmetrical yeah it's just like at a young age the coach just picks where's the hot kid yeah he's cubing it's not a problem i mean dude it's gotta be fuck this kid would i want to get under his center you gotta have like a hot level of confidence to be able to be like i'm gonna be quarterback yeah most people would not even consider that as an idea even an idea of being quarterback i remember the first day of like football tryouts when i was or like football practice when i was in like sixth grade or seventh grade they're like okay everybody thinks they could be quarterback

like line up in these two lines and i i was like yeah like let me fucking throw some balls immediately the coach was like why don't you go take some reps with the receivers he knew i wasn't going to be a fucking receiver but he knew for sure i wasn't going to be a quarterback with this unsymmetrical face dude yeah you put a fucking mirror down the middle of my face it looks like two different people it looks like two different human beings fully yeah i had no chance i was i was never even confident enough to try and play football i was like nah it's not definitely not my sport well you didn't probably didn't get cut from soccer i got cut from soccer oh no i didn't play soccer either soccer and went to football yes dude i i feel like that doesn't happen a lot

no it was bad i think our football team was like, we need guys. Really? You're a fucking chubby ass can fucking slide over. You were a chubby boy? Yeah, I was a chubby sixth grader before I got on Adderall. I was chubby and the Adderall

got me fucking slim and smart. my Adderall got me real slim. I was like 120 pounds in like ninth grade. Yeah. And then I gained 30 pounds after I quit Adderall and my doctor was like,

yeah, you're gaining weight like really like you probably should start dieting and i was like well maybe it had to do with the fact that i weighed 100 pounds when i was in ninth grade so there's like high level amphetamines that would have made hitler blush yeah that fucking good shit that you were giving me taking like the max dosage of adderall when you're 13 years old just rocking like hitler at the olympics yeah dude i never had any of that until i i got an adderall script like for fun when i was older yeah like i like like one of those

like i was like 20 yeah and was like hey i can't focus and he's like here's adderall but that i never had any of that shit as a kid i don't even get taking adderall for fun like i think it i think i hated it so much when i was younger that it made it not i made me not want to take it for fun i've taken it drinking yeah and it doesn't make it more it just makes me like anxious oh and it makes me it makes me like want to drink you're all so hard yeah it makes me like need to drink more to like ease the tenseness from the adderall yeah this isn't fun it's just making and then i just wake up more hungover than I've ever been. My hands are tingling. It's such a vicious cycle where you're like,

I want to drink more, so I'll take this amphetamine. But this amphetamine's making me anxious, so I gotta drink more to calm myself down. But now I'm tired, so I gotta take an amphetamine. It's just like, oh. That shit is vicious. No, I don't fuck with the Adderall stuff at all. But your body got burnt out at a very young age. I mean, yeah, I took everything. I took adderall stuff at all but they your body got burnt out

at a very young age i mean yeah i took everything i took adderall vivance concerta jeez i mean i remember the day i took vivance so clearly i remember it was like my doctor was making me go through like a trial run because like adderall wasn't really working or i didn't like adderall so like all right we're gonna try you on Vyvanse. And I remember taking, I still remember even what the pill looked like because it fucked me up so bad that I just had to lay down the entire day. And my mom was like calling the doctor being like, we're never giving them this again. I remember I took a Stratera or no, I might've been, I don't even know what the fuck it was, but they gave me one of those when I was like 14.

And I remember being in church being like, want to die yeah oh yeah my parents took me home from church it was so bad that they sent me home from fucking church that's the thing is it doesn't make it like you just get depressed yeah that was when my mom made let me finally let me stop taking it was because i went to the doctor and they were like he has no emotions anymore and like we're probably gonna have to give him an antidepressant on top of it. My mom was like, no, we're not. We're not giving him antidepressants and Adderall at the same time when he's 13 years old. We're going to give him the shit that killed Belushi.

A little fast, a little slow. Get him going. Yeah. Dude, I remember when I took a acne medication. I didn't even have bad acne. I had like a pimple or two, which I don't think is technically acne accutane and it wasn't accutane it was something but like they were like like the side effect of this is uh you're gonna have some suicidal thoughts yeah just i was like fucking worth it dude yeah i need to get rid of this pimple yeah they're gonna make fun of me in

school so i'm gonna be suicidal either way i don't know what was in those medicines but i remember it completely changing kids personalities the acne medicine and i remember like some kids like their hair would get curly like they would go from like straight hair or like their hair would get straight like their hair would change from like the acne medicine like they would go to like having like kinked up shirley temple like black kid hair but like maybe it's over with the oils maybe i've no i think that's pretty smart yeah it's probably not true yeah but it's like that's more impressive to have something that makes sense but isn't true well as in it probably i'm assuming the acne medication probably stops the oils yeah coming out of

your skin so maybe it stops the hair too no i have no fucking idea i don't know but it was weird just seeing new kids it's like you don't have acne but you have like a whole new fucking person yeah dude the you guys are some of the uh like how your parents reacted to your adderall prescription mine was as i said i got it much later in life so i wasn't living at home i had like a like a beach house in Newport. And my mom, we didn't lock our doors or anything like that. And my mom had come over just to surprise me for dinner one night. And I had gotten my Adderall prescription like a week earlier.

Yeah. And she went into our house and it was literally, we hadn't cleaned up. We all went to work the next day. We had a party before. And I got home from work and she was just sitting at our kitchen table in front of a mirror with lines of my adderall on it oh no broken up oh no and she's like what the fuck i was like i didn't know you were coming home oh you were had you not surprised me i definitely would have this is actually your fault mom you were snorting it of course we were snorting it? Of course. We were snorting

a lot, Adderall. That's crazy. Adderall is nice to snort. Diet Coke. Dude, we went through a fucking... It wasn't ketamine. We went through a phase of snorting like something very minty.

I don't remember what it was. Oh, I did that with you klonopin no well klonopin's what i was talking about definitely was not snorting klonopin with you oh it's nuts yeah we snorted snuff yes no i snorted a lot of stuff snuff was cool so didn't do anything yeah you definitely weren't doing the Klonopin. But I think that Adderall is almost soft and approachable. I'd take Adderall before a rap battle was a nice boost of a performance-enhancing drug, makes you super focused, you're not forgetting anything, you're not really going crazy. Then I had one rap battle where i fucking took uh a vivance beforehand

and my jaw was literally just like swinging the entire time i didn't forget a fucking word i didn't fucking mess up at all i was fucking perfect but i was like chugging water out of a fucking gallon container the entire time i was just fucking chomping on gum actually you can't hold anything because you break it immediately. You can't crush some shit. I could never take that before doing stand-up. I would have a panic attack on stage for sure. I can't even drink coffee before doing stand-up.

Really? If I have to drink it right in the morning, or else I'll get on stage and I'll be jittery as hell and sweating. I think I could drink a cup of coffee at 10 o'clock at night and go to bed at like 11 30 no I don't have that problem either it just heightens my nerves just your anxiety yeah I know some people just can't have coffee like if they have it at like noon they're like no I'll be up all night I can't have it at any point really despite like my experience with amphetamines and things like that which I'm fine that I can like fucking do a line and go to bed like yeah but like if i if i have coffee i get wired and jittery like for some reason caffeine

and i don't don't mix you don't have any caffeine i don't i don't like avoid it like i i don't really i don't really like soda i basically just drink water but like it's not you know i won't collapse if you're like you want a coke i'll be sure yeah but it is but i hope not a coke has like 30 milligrams of caffeine in it max is that a lot or a little it's so little oh really yeah i don't know maybe it is what's the coffee have uh coffee's like 110 real 90 60 oh maybe it's a red bull's 110 red bull actually doesn't bother me red bull doesn't bother me at all that's why i drink red bull coffee fucks me up but i still like coffee yeah yeah there's like

a little different vibration of coffee if i have one too many sips of coffee it stays over oh but you know what i can do espresso that's crazy like espresso martinis or espresso both espresso martinis are like uh the ultimate confusion for your body yeah like you're just throwing your body into a fucking massive question mark for one one time on like a sunday in newport at this uh bar called castle hill me and my buddy had like we went drink for drink with espresso martinis we had like probably like nine each. Oh. And this was, I was young.

And then this was like, he called me like three days later. We just didn't talk for like three days. And he's like, what have you been doing? And I was like, I have been laying in bed, shivering, shaking.

And he's like, okay, me too. I Googled. We were both like scared to tell each other how bad shape we were in. He's like, I Googled it. I'm pretty sure we have caffeine poisoning.

Yeah, probably. That's a thing? Yeah. Probably. I mean, that's so much caffeine. Nine espresso marks. I mean, nine espressos would kill someone. Yes, that's like the Asian teens who die from jerking off 23 tons in a day or something like that.

That's just an unnecessarily overload for your body. Right. It was a bad day. You know what? It your body right it was it was a bad day you know what i used to it was a great day it was a bad few days after i used to drink these uh these rain energy drinks r-e-i-g-n oh i knew it wasn't spelled right it wasn't spelled like a normal fuck they spell those like apps and rap names they just spelled those fuck me up nick used to drink them too and i remember me and nick would drink them and he'd have to like we'd have to like he'd i remember seeing him just leaving the office

and i'd be like yeah he had too much of the rain i mean do those things those are 300 milligrams of caffeine per can yeah and i would drink i would drink them like i would drink i had it down to like where in the can was enough for them to be like i gotta throw it away now because it tasted so good that you'd keep drinking it but i'm like no i gotta throw it away or else i'm gonna have a panic attack and i mean dude those would why are you doing that well so good i was gonna say so good what percentage of humanity of adult humanity do you think is always walking this tight rope that it feels like everyone here is walking where it's like i don't want to feel normal but i don't like like everyone everyone i think dude here it's probably less

than it is outside really oh yeah of like just like like what substances can i take like does anyone like what percentage of people are just walking around raw dog in the day but dude i even think that the people who are raw dog in the day, people who are like, I meditate. That's doing it too. Yeah, yeah. You're doing it. If you're like meditating, trying to get to like a zen-like place or a runner's high, even those people are trying to get a high or like experience nirvana. Like people who are raw dog and just being like, I'm just going to be completely natural through the rest of my life are still trying to get to a different plane.

Nobody wants to be just sober. No. nobody wants to just be normal at all it all started with our accutane prescription never feel starts curling the people that i know that that like have normal jobs it's like they all they they tell me about it's like they wake up it's fucking iced coffee all day all day it's just oh i gotta go get a new car gonna go get a coffee get a coffee zen the entire it's zen and ice coffee all day no food nothing and then they get off work and they go get beers it is it's like why they're why is it people all day just exist yeah i think i just the option of other stuff going on and i think it happens less in here because people have the uh like the fame they're getting hunger yeah they're like the attention which also is just like another high

yeah like they're just getting the high of they're getting like the same type of serotonin or whatever fucking hit to the brain from the fucking scroll or from somebody liking their shit or trying to get a fucking ton of retweets or some shit like that. So you would argue that inside these walls we're more mentally stable than what's outside? No, I don't think that. I think just less fucked up off drugs. Nobody's mentally stable in here.

Yeah, because I don't think this isn't like a mind numbing job. So people have an easier time just getting through the day. Okay, I see what you're saying. When outside it're up at seven they're up at six in the morning zin coffee instantly as soon as they get out of bed which that has to be just a crazy combo yeah i do that i mean you probably i guess you don't have to have caffeine i do i'll do the nicotine right up yeah i'll be nicotine will be the last thing in my mouth before bed. First thing in the morning.

Oh, yeah. Well, that's how I am. Yeah. Yeah. I'm hitting my jewel as I'm falling asleep. And then I'm as soon as I open my eyes, I'm grasp. I'm looking for it in the bed. I'm also eating.

So it is like I'll eat quick. I'll like I'll fall asleep with food a lot. Like it's usually I try and keep it a little healthier. Like I'll do a popsicle. Maybe. Yeah, I'll fall asleep with food a lot I try and keep it a little healthier I'll do a popsicle maybe What is the unhealthy version of that? Ice cream? I had two grandma slices of pizza Just in bed

But I can't fall asleep Unless I've just eaten What? Soda has a joke about that I was just about to bring that up like he and i remember when he because that's on son of a gary and i remember hearing it's a little older and i remember being like i don't think eating's good before bed because like i was thinking of as like it gives you energy yeah and then i don't know something happened with me in

the last five years or whatever where it's like i have to eat right away before i fall asleep have you tried not doing it yeah and like i'll i'll do it i'll probably three nights a week i'll get in bed and think we're just gonna we're gonna raw dog sleep tonight and i'll i'll toss and turn for like an hour and i'll go get a popsicle real quick that's crazy and i eat popsicle and bro like before that popsicle is gone i'm out out. That's crazy. What? I wonder what's happening in your body. I don't know, man. I get like eating two slices. I'm doing sugar freeze.

I'm doing the outshines. Really? Yeah. Eating two slices of pizza before going to bed definitely helps you fall asleep because those pass out. But a popsicle, I can't see that doing anything. I mean, it's just a glass of fucking water. Yeah.

Pink water. Yeah. But pizza doesn't wake you up three hours later With an esophageal burn No I've been doing The I do the Mephizol I do

I get all kinds of stuff Going on in here Yeah So you're going So you're going Two slices of pizza And then some medication To keep you down after

No I do the Just the Trank in the neck Yeah Yeah oh yeah And I'm high the whole time too Oh but no But you're

And you're taping your mouth shut i'm trying to die you're gonna die i get i get really here's what i do here's how i fall asleep guys i get really fucking high i jam some carbs in my throat and i tape my mouth yeah and i just see if i wake up in the morning taping your mouth shut with pizza like still in your mouth is insane yeah that's how like mobsters would kill people they're gonna find your body one day and there's gonna be like pizza like coming out of your eyeballs and like it was he choked and there was no other way for it to get out is this a prince situation yeah it was coming out of his nose i wanted i want to

try the the mouth tape shut type of shit but i have like a fucking badly deviated septum so i know i need a fucking i know i need some kind of like surgery to fix it but i i'm worried that people will think that i'm getting the surgery cosmetically so i'm just not getting it so i'm just suffering through the fucking deviated septum bro let's talk about this because i'm in the same situation your shit's deviated and they're like you should probably get surgery and i'm and and and they offered to me which i think is kind of fucked up and they're like you should probably get surgery and um and and and they offered to me which i think is kind of fucked up and they're like by the way you can also clean it up a little bit and i was like no one fucking asked you dude yeah fuck off what do

you mean clean it up it's dirty like and we can we can probably shave a little bit off that nose too that would be such a disservice to like your future kids if you ever have any. They're like, daddy's nose is perfect. Why am I a fucking monster? You have to give them a paper trail of where they're... I have no photos of me under 35. This is all your mom's fault. Check her genetics.

He's an Aubrey Hepburn. Cute as a button nose. What do you mean? But the... I want to get the surgery because I hear... I've been told it's like a new life. It improves your consciousness, I've heard. You breathe differently. Yeah.

Like, literally, there's more oxygen to one hemisphere of your brain. Yes. So you could, like, develop new creativity or, like, reason better. So that's obviously super appealing. But I also think it's crazy to let them go in and not fix this if you're in there right might as well fucking fold the clothes clean up a little bit right exactly but then i like am i that kind i can't be that guy yeah getting fucking a nose job yeah yeah that would be nuts that would be crazy yeah but it's easy for you to say with your cute little perfect nose i don't have a perfect nose at all my nose is fucking massive but i do i do

have perfect breathing do you i go to the doctor 98 or 98 98 oxygen levels really yours must be like 85 yeah i'm barely breathing yeah dude like it's just i think they said one side is like uh there's only it's like 80 blocked or some shit like that that's crazy yeah mine's clean as a whistle like if you put your hand under like you just don't feel air coming out of one of my nostrils yeah that book I talked about again that I'm sure Francis read as well they were talking about it's all

about breathing and all this stuff and they said that there was it was a test to be a samurai back in the day before you could be approved to be a samurai they put a feather under your nose and you had to just breathe and if the feather moved at all you're not a samurai so you would have passed what so you basically get to inhale and exhale so slow but that's how like that's the best way to breathe is i think i think it's five breaths a minute is what you're supposed to take god damn and so they were like it's really hard to do but you know how many breaths you take a

minute on average i think i 15 i would guess more i mean i've taken like three in this sentence yeah but if you're not talking like if you're at if you're at rest if you're like if you're like resting heart rate laying down it can't be more than 10 breaths a minute. You think? Yeah. I don't know. I think, I mean, I've never even fucking measured it. I've never even thought about it before.

Wim Hof, that's like, you take like a ton of breaths and then no breaths for like a couple minutes. I just finished this. That's what Wim Hof is? Oh, yeah. You breathe fast and then hold it. You make yourself hyperventilate and then you can hold your breath for like five minutes after have you ever done it no and then it feels like your body's

melting yeah it's another way people get high yeah people are just like breathing that's like how what I imagine like heroin is like I've only done it once or twice because it was too much no but it's too much I didn't like the hypervent it felt like i was out of

control it does feel out of control but once you're done with it you're like i'm fucking god i think i would just pass out it feels like you're gonna pass out that's why you do it literally lying down on the floor because people probably do pass out from it so if you pass out you're just like going to sleep it's pretty intense it's like this sounds like how i go to bed every night yeah it's just a stuff my slice of pizza for you. Stuff my face with pizza. You're Wim Hoffing. You're accidentally Hoffing. Let's talk about The Gentleman.

The Gentleman is a brand new TV show streaming only on Netflix. It follows criminal, drug-dealing, murdering aristocrats in Britain's criminal underworld all right it's starring theo james from the white lotus great actor it's guy richie's brand new hit tv show based on his movie they made it into a show and is on netflix right now i definitely would recommend it it's full of fucking virgin mary they're saying it's Virgin Mary full of weed, Hitler's balls, cocaine,

chickens, and a priest with a shotgun. You'll see some crazy shit in The Gentleman. All right. I'm definitely going to check it out. I love Guy Ritchie's work. I've seen all of his stuff, this show. I've heard nothing but great things about. Go check it out now. The Gentleman is streaming right now on Netflixflix watch what happens when you try to play gangsters at their own game don't miss the gentleman now on netflix yeah i got to uh get back on that i just finished this uh this series uh rome on uh it was like the old hbo series or whatever yeah and they said uh cleopatra kills herself in it with uh with like an asp or whatever and they said she takes it's the when the snake bites you it's 40 breaths until until

you die that's how they measured it so that means that like the person who there's somebody who comes around like literally a merchant of death being like you want this to kill you like this won't be painful like this will be quick but like your body will bloat and it'll ruin it. Like, quickest and, like, most aesthetic way to do it is getting bit by the snake. And it's 40 breaths. So they've, like, counted it out. So they've seen enough people die where they, like, no, it's just 40 breaths. And then you're just fucking gone. Was this Cleopatra's death, was it a suicide or was it she was punished?

Suicide. It was suicide. But it was, like, an honor. Like, they had just? Suicide. It was suicide. But it was like an honor. Like they had just lost a battle and like the enemies were at their gates. And so her and Mark Antony killed themselves. She handled it. Yeah, she handled it. Honorable death.

She just put a fucking snake to her titty and fucking. That's kind of a sick way to go. Snake to titty? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Probably hurts. You think so? Yeah. But like not. I mean, Mark Antony, the way he did. That doesn't sound great. Snake to titty? Yeah Oh yeah Probably hurts You think so? Yeah

But like not I mean Mark Anthony The way he did That doesn't sound great I don't want to have to have 40 more breaths After I kill myself That's a very good point

That's like a long ass suicide I do like her being Conscious Of What her dead body Would look like Like that's bad bitch She wants to have a hot corpse

I don't want to be Bloated in death Yeah Yeah I'll go drown myself in the niger if i want to be bloated 40 brett i mean for a samurai that's like a good 10 minute fucking 10 minutes after the snake bites you but uh mark anthony went out uh actually cleopatra did him dirty she fucking had her they had one last night of like drinking and like fucking and they didn't know what they were going to do and then cleopatra sent her assistant the next morning and was like the the queen has killed herself and mark anthony was fucking her gave her two children and so uh and there was like a letter and she was like she

hopes to see you soon and so mark anthony woke up he was basically like this is a good way to cure this hangover and he fucking had one of his soldiers like hold his knife against his stomach and just pulled it in and fucking stabbed himself no just like stabbed himself up through his heart and just fucking basically disemboweled himself so i'll take the fucking snake yeah why didn't they just hang themselves they didn't have rope back then hanging themselves hanging yourself isn't isn't some fucking peaches and cream way to go you think hanging yourself is way better than getting the snake

bite do you know that do you know that uh less than 2% of suicides are by stabbing? So when people die by getting stabbed. No, I don't think I did know that. When people kill themselves by stabbing themselves to death, they usually assume that they were murdered. Or were Japanese. Yeah, or they're Japanese. Because of how brutal it is.

Yeah, it's insane. That's why Elliot Smith, they think that he didn't kill himself, they think that his girlfriend killed him. Interesting. No one thinks that. There's why Elliot Smith, they think that he didn't kill himself. They think that his girlfriend killed him. Interesting. No one thinks that. There's like five people on Earth that think that. Elliot Smith. You don't know Elliot Smith?

No. He's a singer. Really? I don't think so. It's like the whole soundtrack of Good Will Hunting. No, I don't know. Oh, there's someone coming around here. There is some new thrill. I'm going to listen to him now, though.

Yeah, it's great. I also want to come back to something i'm pretty sure i said the wrong name of a river recently yeah yeah and it sounded like a way with it there's a nile and then there's a tiger yes and you say you combine them to be a naughty naughty word i'm gonna be honest as you were explaining how mark anthony uh killed himself i was too busy in my own head having a pan of taffy. I'm like, dude, what the fuck did you just say? So I kind of caught it at the end that he stabbed himself.

But I was like, wait, nope, it's denial. Nope, is that? I think I said it nice enough that way because it doesn't have to go anywhere. It's just not the right name of the river. You said it the perfect way to dodge. I heard it and I was like, oh, okay. I was like, I didn't know there was a river with that name no you literally combined two real river names the tigris and the nile are two i do like that though just roll on the dice i'm

just gonna say the m word i mixed in a little bit of niger like it was a couple of a couple of different words i just blended like that's got to be a river in Egypt, right? You said it like tiger. You said it like tiger. If you said it like the, if you said it like Tigger, that would be bad. But you said it like tiger, you're good to go. Oh man, I can't believe that they named the character from Winnie the Pooh that. What, Tigger?

Yeah, for like children learning the English language. That's a fucking dubious name. I never even had the realization. Yeah. I always thought it was just normal. It's probably because children don't really know the N-word. I remember when I first learned the N-word. Do you?

Yeah, I heard it in a rap song and I was just walking around just spitting it. Really? Yeah, and then my parents heard me say it. They got pissed. They got pissed? Yeah, they said, you can said you can't say that dude i said i don't give a shit i'm gonna say it anyway they said that word has no art at the end yeah the uh the when i was a kid i i used to go to my friend's house a lot and they were kind of white trash and they would use racial slurs and one of them was when we were

chinese food yeah they would say we're getting blank food yeah and they would use the slur for g word or c word c word okay and i came home after enough chinese dinners at their house where i was like hey and i just thought it was normal and i was like mom and dad can we get blank food for dinner my mom was like what did you just say and i was like blank food she goes are you kidding me you know do you do you know what that means and i was like no yeah like sesame chicken and this is a nice moment to kind of maybe have a talk with your son about racial slurs and things like that. She goes, it means penis. You want penis food, John Henry?

What? And I was like, oh my God, no. And then for like 10 more years, I thought that word meant penis. I was like in college when I found out. You started using it way more? Saying that at lacrosse practice? I was like an adult. I might have been like 17.

I might have been towards the end of high school. And I was like, adult i might have been like 17 i've been towards the end of high school and i was like wait that word means what yeah i thought i thought my whole life it just meant dick that would have been a good rebrand for that word if it means like delicious food and stuff like that like i think that that's like a positive rebrand if you just are mentally associating it with fucking kung pao chicken or something like that yeah your mom just your mom just threw your mind in a fucking loop-de-loop just like yeah i guess i don't know what she just didn't want to tell you what it actually meant i guess she just didn't want to have that conversation she's probably tired like i'm not fucking dealing with this right now i'm

not gonna break down the history behind the slur of racism he's like well why is that a bad word it's just kind of a shortened version. Yeah. Because isn't like, I don't even know if I could say it. Is the J word? What, Japs? Yeah. Thank you. I don't think you don't have to not say that.

I don't know. Because I think that for some people, that's like a naughty word. Well, that's just bad because of World War II, right? Yeah. But it's just a shortened version of like- Right. Yeah. Yeah, it's like

jews yeah yeah yeah it's exactly like jews it's not that bad maybe i didn't even know that was a bad one i don't know but your ass might be in the jackpot now yeah maybe we'll see don't worry i talked about a river earlier my my great-grandmother wouldn't eat Chinese food because she was so racist against Japanese people really that's crazy yeah

her brother was killed in Pearl Harbor and she's like I won't eat it and I was like no it's a completely different they don't like each other either honestly

like she was cool about it though we're like you could eat all the Chinese food you wanted she wasn't gonna support Japan like that it's not the money's not going to their pockets. It's not like the Catholic church where it all funnels back into one bank account.

Yeah, they're sending it to the war fund. Your nukes are made by one omakase at a time. It's not like if you order General Tso's in East Village, it's going straight back to China. Well, of course, we'll take our 10%. She'd come over for dinner and she'd be like, we'd order Chinese food. And she'd be like, well, I've not eaten that. And she would just sit at the table with us.

Really? I was like, damn, you are committed to this racism because this smells delicious. I might get Chinese food after this. I'm definitely getting Chinese food. Yeah. Talking ourselves into it. I'm going to kill for some Chinese food right now.

I don't even think it's racist of her if her fucking brother was killed. Oh, no. Yeah, no. She's just riding for the colors right it's like that gang warfare at that point she's just like no i'm buds i'm not fucking going out like that i'm not wearing blue in terms of all the foods though like if you're gonna protest one food i think i'd be fine protesting sushi why because it's just nasty and slimy no i like sushi but i could live without having sushi ever again for sure yes like sushi's not i'll eat sushi sushi is what i'll order when i'm like i'm gonna be healthy today right so you get like some tempura shrimp no no i'll get like a fucking i don't know what is the sashimi some of that was just the raw fish look at some of that

fish and rice uh the uh i never thought i'd like that and then nate's on his omakase kick so i've done a couple of makases with him yeah is that the one where they bring out a new yeah it's like one piece every dude it's like when do you get to a point where i've done it and it's like it asserts towards the end you're like i if can we leave because this is too much i have last one, it starts getting gross. And by like the 14th piece, you're like, I'm going to throw up. And then they hand you something that's got like eggs on it,

scallops wrapped in seaweed. And you're like, I'll throw up if I eat this. You definitely walk away feeling like I just ate an aquarium. I just ate every single thing in the sea. I ate like barracuda. Did you really? Yeah, it was great. But I think that barracuda has a nastier name and perception no barracuda was one of the good ones but i'm saying barracuda as it's just

like a long fish yeah like it's not like you think of a barracuda as like a kid or something like that you think of the blue barracudas oh yeah or that song like oh barracuda well for a while i thought that barracuda was the only fish that had teeth like they make it out to be like oh that one's scary they have teeth most fish have teeth make it out to be like, oh, that one's scary. They have teeth. Most fish have teeth. It's like striped bass don't have teeth. And barracudas are like little bitches.

Yeah. They're just like a little like flute-like fish. They're pretty big. Oh, maybe I just saw some tiny barracudas. I think barracudas can get pretty big. Really? But I think they're pretty similar in size to like pike. You're the fish guy. And pike have big ass teeth.

I got a pike and I picked it up by my finger and I was like, oh shit. Really? Yeah. Some fish have like the fucking, like human teeth. Oh yeah.

And then you go, you see the- Those are the ball biters. Oh really? That goes viral like once every three years like this, like human teeth

and it bites your testicles. I don't know how real it is. I would guess probably not. Yeah, I always get spooked by that. The ball biters and the thought that some kind of flesh eating bacteriaating bacteria will swim up my penis oh yeah that is that actually happened to someone i know really they got some sort of bacterial infection from the

ocean they almost had their leg amputated that's what they told their girlfriend yeah it's from the ocean now he worked on the water and his leg got fucking huge yeah it's crazy was it was it gross i don't know i don't really know i didn't really know much about it was like my i was like one of my friends dads then the other fish you always see are the fucking ones that are at like the like 20 000 feet of going with like the thing going over and their teeth are literally like a fucking monster yeah nightmares yeah like the sharpest teeth of all time that are like fucking this long yeah i don't fuck with that stuff at all i don't fuck with like the deep ocean at all even like videos of it i have to turn them off i'm like i can't watch that's too scary that shit scares the fuck

out of me like the videos you're seeing that video the guy going in like the world's deepest pool yeah that shit yeah i think it's more depth with me than it is it's the animals down but that shit is like i think space is way more scary to me because space to me is like a threat like there's stuff falling from outer space black holes you could get sucked into and stuff in space like there's no threat of the deep ocean i'm not gonna fall to the bottom of the ocean but there's a like shark but i'm saying i'll never go down there to like 20 000 feet i'll never wind up down there i don't know man you go on a cruise or some shit even if I fall into the ocean I'm dying before I fucking get all the way down there like I'll never be

down there if you got offered to go down there would you like if like from this podcast someone reaches out like I got this submarine though after those fucking bros got fucking pancaked in their little fucking I would never even consider it I consider it if someone hit me up and was like hey you want to go on one of those like shark tanks where the fucking I would be like not even not a chance oh I would do that shark cage yeah not a chance am I doing I don't even want to like I would want to see I want to see a great white in person but I want to see it

from like either the shore or from like a dock or from like a big boat I've I've reeled a shark in before yeah but not like a great white not a great white but it was like a I boat? I've reeled a shark in before. Yeah, but not like a great white. Not a great white, but it was like a, I think it was a blue shark,

like seven feet. Yeah. That's fucking huge. That's huge. That's massive. It was, I did it the week after the Martha's Vineyard shark competition

and it would have won. Really? Yeah. Damn, that's cool. There's shark competitions? There's a big shark. There's a shit ton of sharks in Martha's Vineyard

It's like I think I think the competition started After Jaws came out But I think it's kind of like A carry on the tradition But like yeah Every summer there's a

Martha's Vineyard shark Fishing competition How does shark eat? Nasty? What do you mean? Do people eat it? Does it taste good? Oh I don't know

I don't think they have I think they make soup Out of the fins right? Yeah That's what they do in China I don't know if they do that In know. I don't think they have. I think they make soup out of the fins, right? Yeah. That's what they do in China. I don't know if they do that in America. Yeah, I don't think they do because it's super inhumane. They just pull the sharks out, chop off their fins, and throw them back in the water.

I mean, do we kill other animals? Yeah. At least we're leaving them alive. I think the point is that they'd rather kill them. Yeah. At that point, you're just a torpedo. I bet the shark would rather fucking. The shark's just a torpedo just beelining for the bottom of the ocean.

There's no way to. Yeah. Just getting eaten by everything else. It's funny because. It's literally like if someone pulled you out of the water, chopped off all of your limbs, and then just threw you back in the water. Only it's worse because you can't. At least you can drown.

The shark's like, I just have to sit here. Yeah, true. Until I die have to sit here until I die. Or something eats them or something. That is funny. I guess that is kind of inhumane. Yeah. But that is, it's like, we eat fish, and, like, that's completely fine. No one eats sharks because they're disgusting,

and people, like, don't eat dolphins because, like, they're, like, beautiful, but they're supposed to be, like, delicious, and it's inhumane to eat dolphins or something like that. Is it? Is it? I thought mahi-mahi was dolphin. Is it not? I thought mahi-mahi was just a delicious fish.

I thought it was a fish, too. I'm not sure. I'm pretty sure you two are right. But it might have a face like a dolphin kind of, though. It might be a little hybrid looking. Mahi-mahi does have a dumb, kind of punchable face. I think I only, not only, exclusively, but I think most of the time i eat it i'm in the bahamas so i just assume it's dolphin yeah but isn't i think that they have like dolphin in iceland or something like that they offer it some places because it's not illegal

but it's like inhumane so you're not supposed to think in iceland they had some sort of food that you could eat some sort of fish fish. Some dolphin or something like that? Yeah. But they're like, you should, even though they eat it over there, you shouldn't do it because it's inhumane or something. They got the oldest sharks in the world in Iceland. Really?

Yeah, it's like they're like the oldest, like one of the oldest living beings on earth. Like Megs? No, it's like, what, like Megalodon? Yeah. I know you love action movies. I've seen both. Yeah. No, it's action movies. I've seen both. Yeah.

I know there's shit. No, it's like, what is it called? It's like the green, or fuck, what is the other? Oh, Greenland Shark. Yeah. And it's, they're like 3,000, like the oldest one's like 3,000 years old or some shit. Damn. Yeah.

They just have fucking shit all over them. They're like- They're deep as hell. Oh, really? You'll never see one. But they're just around there? Yeah. Just hanging arounds just to be clear 3 000 years old massive super deep in the water they're not that i don't think they're that big though they're obviously they're not megalodon size they're so deep they're like yeah like yeah no i know they're below the it's i what it's called, but there's like a level of separation.

The Megs live below that. Yeah? Yeah. It's a heat thing. It's a heat thing. The water down there is warmer. But if there's a hole punctured in that and warm water comes up through here, then the Megs can survive in our water.

Oh, really? Yeah. Then that's when you got to call Statham. I was totally wrong about that that's fine no one gives a fuck actually there is probably someone at home that's like they live till they're like 500 fuck you you idiot someone someone is like i'm actually a shark expert and uh listening to this episode made me want to scream i'm actually a shark myself yeah that's not how we want to be represented and also by the way Sass dresses like

yeah I'm a shark and I will not be talked down to I'm a shark expert and it looks like he raided his dad's closet fucking assholes fuck them what time are we at perfect

let's get the fuck out of here alright we can wrap it up thank you for joining us thank you for having that was awesome that flew by i thought we were like 20 minutes in to be honest no that was great appreciate you bro you're the fucking man thank you so much yeah any dates any dates oh i'm actually i'm gonna be in providence rhode island next weekend so come see me there comedy connection yes okay yeah and uh we'll watch. And we'll watch Out of Order. Watch Out of Order. Watch,

I'm going, what is that other thing you're doing? I'm going to Iceland. You're going to Iceland? Next week? Next weekend. Shoot. Hell yeah.

So I'm going to be having some dolphin. So if you're in Iceland, say what's up. Great brown trout out there. Really? I had brown trout out there. I'm definitely having some trout. I'm definitely eating nothing but trout.

They put some weird sauce on it that I didn't like though. So I had to kind of pick around. Noted. Also, everyone will stare at you. Why? Because you're American. They'll have no idea.

They will. They'll have no idea. Everywhere you go, people just give you the death stare. Really? You'll walk and people don't talk to each other in Iceland. Yeah, because they're like not night they have like a 99 suicide rate yeah you walk into a restaurant like with your you'll walk in are you going with your wife like me and my buddies would walk in and we'd be like just

having a conversation and we'd walk in and it would be completely silent in a packed restaurant and they'd all turn and look at you really like look at these fucking jackasses talking talking it's probably because you and your boys were like fucking rumbling in like a t-ball team after practice pretty much yeah but it's like i mean you're going into like it's not even like you're going to take a bar you'd expect it to be like you'd you'd go to a bar you'd sit at a table everyone around you would just be in complete silence like couples just sitting there with their drink just being like again another day they're all just fucking humming on accutane yeah yeah i respect it but it's great it's a fun time i look forward to being nothing like you said it will have such different experiences i guarantee

we will where are you going iceland i know where iceland uh the south coast south coast so like rekjavik flying into Reykjavik and then going south from there are you going down to Kev I'm not going all the way over to Kev

I'm not trying to spend my time in the city we got cities in fucking America not too many of us Kev is not a city Keflavik bro this

oh Kev I was thinking of another one Kev is very close to Reykjavik I don't fucking know I'm not going to the cities I'm staying in the fucking wilderness Kev is very close to Reykjavik. I don't fucking know. I'm not going to the cities. I'm staying in the fucking wilderness.

I'm going out there to get in touch with Mother Nature. Hell yeah. It's going to be sweet. All right. Well, good luck. I guess we'll talk about that more on Monday. We're going to see you twice again before then. Yeah, fuck.

I blew my load. All right. We'll see you guys on Tuesday. Goodbye. Thank you, gentlemen. Yeah, of course. Thanks for doing it.