Son of a Boy Dad - FULL HOUSE | Son of a Boy Dad #299

Episode Date: May 8, 2025

FULL HOUSE | Son of a Boy Dad #299 -- #Ad: Exclusive $35-off Carver Mat at https://AuraFrames.com. Promo Code [BOYDAD] -- #Ad: Go to https://kraken.com/barstool to learn more-- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- #Ad: Connect with a provider at RO.co/SON to find out if prescription Ro Sparks are right for you and get $15 off your first order -- #Ad: Go to https://vuori.com/BOYDAD for 20% off your first purchase. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, son of a boy, dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. I could do that. Yeah. All right, ready? All righty, welcome back to the son of a boy dad podcast. Today it is May 7th and we are here live from HQ3 with a full crew. Francis is back looking fucking looking like a slice of key lime pie. Looking like Kim Jong-un on Easter. It is a good fit though. It looks amazing. I

don't think I can pull off black shoes because they make my feet look so tiny. So they look, they make you look bespoke. Thank you. What are those shoes? These are by Dries Van Naughton. Are those suede? I was put onto these by my buddy, Jake Wolf,

who is a great Instagram follow if you like sort of cool fashion stuff for men. Nice. You know him personally? Well, not really. We just DM a lot. Oh, oh. I thought you were just, I thought it was just some dude you followed on Instagram? No. No. God no. Yeah, the black shoes only work with pants too. When we went to New Orleans for the Super Bowl, I was wearing my Sambas and I was wearing shorts.

And I was like, this is maybe the worst look I've ever had. Dude, I gotta say, I think I'm pretty out on shorts. Yeah, agreed, agreed, for sure. I don't think I'm gonna wear it, especially, I mean, in the summer, just to go to work in shorts to me feels like I'm slapping America in the face So what are you gonna do when it's like 95? I think I am a fucking soccer player What is this camp? Diego Maradona fucking short shorts. What so what are you gonna do?

It's 95 Cuz it'll get there. I you wear pants like these. You wear a linen pant. In 95? You know, I can't pull off a linen pants. I'm asking for suggestions right now. I'm not gonna be outside that much. Right? You get to work, you're in your air conditioning. Yeah, true.

What about like a jog? Well, yeah, to exercise, of course I'll wear shorts. Then yeah, that's fine. I just always wear some linen. I walk around this office sometimes in the summer and I see the number of people wearing shorts and I feel like I work at a fucking YMCA. I don't like wearing shorts

just because I don't wanna wear shorts to the pod. I don't wanna wear shorts on camera. We got Jake Bass here. What's going on, Jake? We just, we're't want to wear shorts to the pod. I don't want to wear shorts on camera. We got Jake Bass here. What's going on, Jake? We just, we're in a writer cup meeting. Oh yeah. You're being formally invited.

Whoa. To the writer cup. To the writer cup. By who? Hank and Brendan and I. Oh, sweet. That's a big deal. When's that?

June. June. If you're in. Dude, that's a big deal. I'm down. You should do that. But you're going to need to practice. I'm going to have to hit the range who's in it Briggs Whitney Dave Dan

Pft. Arian Francis Jerry. Oh, yeah, I could definitely do that Fuck yeah, that's Sunday Monday Tuesday No, I know it's a Wednesday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday. Why? What you got? No. No, I was just looking at the calendar. Oh, yeah. Yeah, maybe it's the 24th to 26 It's that Tuesday Wednesday Thursday. Fuck. Yeah, Wednesday. Yeah lock it in right before the 4th of July Perfect right before I chip off to Wyoming. And so that must mean that my invitations like Right behind this right behind there dude, that's a huge deal. I'm so pumped. You're gonna come to that. That's gonna be fun Yeah, well, no, you I appreciate it. You don't get paid for that though. That's not part of your job. You just get paid to do the podcast

Oh, no, I mean we're gonna work that out me and Dave how revenue share Of the writer cup yeah, you think I'm going all the way to Boston for free I Mean they would pay for you to get there But I'm definitely gonna do that sounds great if our team wins you'll get our team presume who's I don't pay for you to get there, but. I'm definitely gonna do that. It sounds great. If our team wins, you'll get. Our team. Presume, who's, I don't know. They'll do, they'll catch us. You sure I'm not on Dave's side, brother?

Why wouldn't I be on Dave's side? Us Jews, we gotta stick together right now. Times are tough. Why wouldn't I be on Dave's side? I was on Dave's team last time. Were you? I genuinely don't know, I don't know a ton about it. Great.

So what is it? I know what the actual Ryder Cup is but it's a similar We it's it's team team golf. How many how many people per team? Well, I don't know last time but there might have been six per team and what's the format? Well, oh you don't have to give anything. No, I don't know. I mean, the last... I'm just going off last time. I think we did best ball of two for the first one, and then there might have been, like, a scramble, alternate shot, something like that. And then the final day was, like, three on three.

Teams of three. Fuck yeah. Each team got to pick three guys. So, 12 people? So, it's like a tight event? Yeah. Wow. Sass got to pick three guys. So 12 people? So it's like a tight event. Yeah. Wow, SAS is blowing up right now. That's what I'm saying.

Like, I'm so happy to have you be part of that. T12, Pac-12. I just played Oakmont over the weekend where they're playing the US Open. We did this for the USGA with 4Play. And it's in US Open condition. Yeah. The rough meaning, it was,

and we played from where they tee off. Yeah. We played the championship tees. It was the hardest thing I've ever done athletically. What'd you shoot? Well, that video is going to come out, so I'm not sure if I should say. But I will say I played really solid. Yeah. And I was say, I played really solid.

Yeah. And I was very pleased with how I played. Where is that, Pittsburgh? Yeah. That's going to be so awesome. Wow, you guys are fucking blowing up right now. Is this what happened while I was gone? You guys just ascended to a different stratosphere

without me? Look, it is pretty funny. We were talking about it downstairs, how the banking of episodes and stuff. And it was like, you were gone for like three episodes. Right? You barely missed the show. And somehow you guys are getting invitations

to fucking play in the Masters. You're well gone. Infuriating, I need to take off golf. Why don't you come, you can, why don't you just go? Does it sound like Jake Bass just invited me? We'll talk to Jake. I think that the reason he came in with his own microphone. I think you're coming because you performed well when you did the thing with Frankie

and people thought in you in your solid golfer. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's why. Yeah, we all know that your personality is not going to happen. I'm not going to talk. Well, you you're just gonna be the guy that's like, I don't even care what's going on here. No, I'll definitely care. What are the rules? I get competitive with stuff.

I love competing. Yeah. What was the golf tournament where I kept on stepping on rubber duckies or something like that? That was the mini golf where I came in third place and then they dropped me down to, what was it, ninth? But you had a conniption when I stepped on the mini golf We were in the final round of mini golf and I'm in third place and ron

There's these you know those chickens the rubber chickens that you that squeak they let out that absurd noise For some reason they were all over the place and ron kept on stepping on them while I was in the middle of putting And everyone was like look how mad sass is and I'm dude, this is like a hundred grand is on the line right now. It was the first round that I was doing it in. No. Yeah, because I was in it. No, it was every single dude. You were on the same hole every time. Every time I got on, I didn't make the cut.

I was eliminated after the first round. But you were still everywhere. You were on that. It wasn't everywhere. I don't even think you were competing. No, I think you were on the whole... It wasn't everywhere. I don't even think you were competing. No. I think you were on the mic. It was while I was competing. I wouldn't step on a rubber ducky to fuck with you.

Yeah, you do. That's exactly what happened. I'm just jealous, I think, that you guys have golf. Well, that's always been something we've both been very... I don't know. I don't know. I haven't swung a golf club in a while. So I'm gonna have to get out there. That was such a nice move by him to even come in and grab a mic like that. That was nice. Were you guys tipped off? Yeah. Because he was ready to go.

Hairball, you can come out and practice with me at my club beforehand if you want, but you are going to have to wear a collared shirt. Yeah, I have golf shirts. You do? Three years on varsity. You still have those? Yeah.

You kept your high school varsity golf shirts? That wasn't that long. It was like six years ago. Tell you what, I don't have any of my high school sports gear. How long has it been for you? 16 years. Yeah, but I got rid of it within the six year window. Oh, look, if you had a custom Nike golf shirt with your name on it, you'd keep it.

From Duxbury High. You don't have one of those. Nike golf shirt with your name on it, you'd keep it. From Duxbury High. You don't have one of those. No, you know what happened? I remember now. I got rid of all of my high school gear when it was replaced by Harvard Nike customized stuff. I know you still have some of that stuff.

I sure do. I bet you guys got some of that stuff. I sure do. I bet you guys got some sick gear. We really did. What would you get? It was as if it was like the Matrix when Neo was like, I need Nike. Lots of Nike. So sick. Yeah.

That's going to be the best part about being like a good athlete. I thought you were going to say the best part about going to Harvard. On top of the hundreds of millions of dollars. But when we toured the Vikings facility, I I mean you guys I've said it a thousand times I'm a gear junkie But we were we were touring the practice facility and they got to shut like they get those guys just walk in and there's like 12 pairs of cleats and they just go like those are the ones I want It's insane. Yeah with everything though, right visors helmets you get over it pretty quickly

Yeah, but it's not a big part of it for really You get to a point where you're like, I don't have any room for any more of this stuff true I could see that Justin Jefferson is two lockers because there's so much free shit Yeah, it's like big cat when he had the pile the pile I think it barstool early on like we would get everything or like people would send us stuff and you I think you get over Pretty quickly. Yeah, I never did. What?

Every time I go to my desk and there's a box, I'm like... You saw the box the other day, I was like, you want this range? Look at this, what I found. I was trying to give Francis this range finder that was on my desk for golf. Not mine. No idea whose it is. It's been there forever and he was like, I don't want that at all. I threw out some stuff from your desk today. I got back to the desk and there was just some bullshit, like empty boxes with confetti inside of them.

Why are you keeping these? I wasn't, that was a package that was sent to me. From Rhythm? Yeah, from a company. The weed company. Oh, nice. You're getting sponsored by weed companies now? No, that was, we all got an invitation

to like this party. Yeah, but you got one too. You got the VIP package. You don't think you got one? No, I didn't. Fucking Snoop Dogg of the bar stool offices. You don't think you got, you're sucking on a weed lollipop as we speak.

If he's Snoop, you're Wiz Khalifa over here. Yeah, you're Willie Nelson. Not true at all. Smoking for longer and stronger. Snoop Dogg quit, you don't remember that ad from a few years ago? Yeah, he went smokeless. Okay, I really want to finish that story

we started a couple episodes ago really quick. Yes, it'll drive traffic back to that other episode. You mentioned that you already admitted. I don't feel like talking about that. Really? Yeah. You were that you already admitted. I don't feel like talking about that. Really? Yeah. You were ready to then.

No. I think actually, I think the, I have a very vivid memory of you going, should I tell this story? And I said, no. No. You said it's fine. And we started telling it and then we,

something we changed the subject as we often do. Well, I guess, did you guys see the? Holy shit. It's a very funny story. It's really not. It's not that funny of a story. I'll tell a story. Why don't you say like, I was-

I was smoking a joint. Alone. And I thought to myself, boy, if I were sharing this joint with someone, I wonder what that would be like. And I continued to smoke the joint and pass it to myself back and forth, past the point where I wanted to smoke anymore.

But because I was so sort of self-conscious about wanting to look like I knew what I was doing with weed, I smoked it to a point where both I and the person I thought I would want to smoke with were impossibly high. You smoke with an imaginary friend to the point where you both get fucking stoned? And then I thought to myself, my God, I'm so uncomfortably high, why did I go so far? And it was just this weird thing

where I was not admitting to myself that I didn't want anymore, when in fact my other self didn't want anymore either. Getting uncomfortably high is such a weird part of the ritual of weed smoking. It was really fun. Ron, are you off the cush? Off or on?

I'd say off right now. I haven't smoked since I've had, since I had seed. Yeah? Yeah. I would. Not even dabbled? No. Not even a taste?

I'm not trying to be like uncomfortably high, trying to hold a baby. True. That is exactly what I would want. What? If I were uncomfortably high and someone handed me a baby, I'd be like, oh, thank God. Yeah.

Of all the things I want, this is perfect. A sleeping baby. What a wonderful palliative. You're saying it'd be calming? Yeah. To look down at this beautiful. You're saying it'd be calming? Yeah. To look down at this beautiful life and see that it's serene and sleeping. I feel like all it would take is it opening its eyes

and crying, and then you're like, I'm a fucking monster. Well, it looks up at you with your bloodshot red eyes, and you're like, that's not me. Sounds like you guys. No, god no. But I think that normally I would have that feeling. But I think since it's my baby, I'd have to be,

I would worry about, am I doing enough for this baby's life or whatever. Like if it was someone else's baby, like yeah, fucking throw it out with the bath water. But you know. Smoke all the weed you want. Well, I haven't asked you. I'm smoking blunts around that baby but you know. Smoke all the weed you want. Yeah. Well, I haven't asked you. I'm smoking blunts around that baby, you know?

Would you stop fucking talking over him? I know, my bad. Oh man. What were you gonna say? You haven't asked what? I have been so conscious of not talking over anyone in this episode so far to the point where I don't even wanna speak.

For those of you at home and for our dear friend Shane Gillis, to the point where I don't even want to speak. For those of you at home and for our dear friend Shane Gillis, Shane texted the three of us yesterday. And let me just say that I also have a friend who's not doing very well right now. Well, tell the story chronologically. Okay. For how it happened.

Has anyone seen my jewel? Before we hop into that No, no, no, I said to get it out there cuz I don't if someone's got it they got to give it back You're on your own couch times up that's all you'd say no jokes over You'd know we love that joke, but we don't get to do it anymore. Someone stole my jewel. It's really, it's gone. But it's all good. It's in my pocket?

All right. I'm such a fucking psycho about that thing. It's always in your pocket. Right now. Shane texted us yesterday, the three of us, after their episode that I was absent on came out and said, Wow, thank God, an episode with Rone and Harry. So, you know, finally not not having Francis.

It's better without Francis or something. And I I wrote back something like. No problem, you know, they can have it like whatever. And he goes, yeah, well, the issue is that you talk over people. I don't think it was as intense as this. I think I'm pretty close. Yeah, but it was like lighthearted at the time.

And then, are you sure? I would think. Why don't you read it? I don't have my phone. Just read it. I don't wanna read it. Why not? I'm not getting involved in this.

You're implicitly involved. I'm not involved. I think I said one thing that entire chat text chat. I think I said, ha ha. I think that was it. Yeah, because you're so conflict diverse. Ha ha ha ha. Ja ja ja.

He said, finally, roam back. And no Francis exclamation point, fuck yeah. Yeah, it is more lighthearted. That's fine. And he said, I'm fine with all of that. Yeah, yeah. And he said, and you said, we're gonna move to me just one app a week.

And then he said, that would be better. You talk over people too much. But that's why he's saying it because you don't do that. And then he said, and then you said working on it. And Shane said, JK. And I said, Francis, don't listen to him. We like when you talk over people. And then you said, am I high?

I'm not the talk over people guy. Well, we had posted a clip from that week of you doing the, doing exactly it. Yeah, that's why he said it. Okay. And then he said, what do you mean? You do a lot, but it's fine. He's talking about me.

I know, but I think he's just busting your balls. No, that double down is, this is truth. That's ball about me. I know, but I think he's just busting your balls. No, that double down is, this is truth. No, that's ball busting. No, it's not. I'm a pro ball buster. You do, but it's fine means, I don't really mean this, but objectively what I've said is true. I just don't want you to take it personally,

which he realized I had. I think it's involved ball busting. I think he just, I think he's trying to be serious about it, but then you said this sucks and Shane said why And you said I quit I Got a lot of other stuff going on have at it boys Harry said ha ha ha ha ha ha ha yeah Shane said ha ha ha ha ha ha Francis said in

parentheses I'm not kidding. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. So let me provide a little context. I was sitting in the ICU at Northwestern Hospital in Chicago visiting a friend of mine who just had surprise brain surgery. And this is one of my closest friends. And I'm getting these texts. I'm very like, I'm not doing well with the situation

at hand and I have no ability to filter ball busting at that point. So nobody knew that, but I was just so strung out and distraught from what I had been facing and dealing with that I just was like, I can't handle this. You guys take the podcast. I remove myself. You said visiting a buddy who had surprise brain surgery, explain that a little bit. Shane said, damn, you said can't handle much right now on me.

And then Shane just sent the Uno reverse car. It's very funny. I forgot about that. It's very funny. I totally forgot about that. But that was the extent of it. And, but we were all like, you don't talk over people or afterwards we're like, yeah, bro,

you don't talk over people. Literally don't worry about it. I don't know. I have no idea what way is up and what way is down now. I tend to trust when Shane says something and then says JK. In my experience with him, that usually is a truth. It's just true.

Whatever he has said prior to that, I trust to be true. So I'm gonna work on that. I also says you don't talk over people, but Shane just can't make fun of Sass because he already will never get a spot in tires. That's true. That's true. Yeah, that is true.

You don't talk over people. I think I talk a lot, but I try to make a point of not being interruptive. But if I am failing at that, I will go watch a game film. I think that people in the chat would agree with you that you don't talk over people. The chat? Whatever, the fucking comments.

Sorry, this isn't rhone.com. There is no chat. So, can I... I'm sure you guys have dealt with friends falling ill, and I'm not trying to get serious about this, but it was a very... strange experience for me. And one that was kind of... I don't know. It did change perspective for me on some stuff.

Because this is a... my friend is a very healthy guy. This came out of nowhere. Yeah. And his whole life is on hold now. Yeah. It's fucked. And he's probably not going to go to work for a month more. I don't know. Oh nice. And he has a good job.

So it's like, what do you, what happens? What do you do? I have no idea. Have you guys ever dealt with this? No. I've had friends get in like bad accidents where they just like have to stop going to work. And so I can't do the same thing.

You visit them in the hospital. I tried to, I had like a bunch of like weed gummies that were like shaped like donuts that I like tried to smuggle into my buddy's hospital room and left them everywhere. And his mom found all of them. You left them everywhere. His mom found all of them like an Easter egg and like threw them all out. I don't think she was happy with me because she was like the only other person there and

she'd like sit on something there'd be a donut shaped weed gummy. I'd be fucking hiding. But it's like, yeah, I agree that it's a weird circumstance. You don't know what to do. It's very different from visiting sort of an older person who's sick or whatever. And I've had a hard time processing it. I was very upset about it.

Really upset. I'm not trying to say, obviously, I'm not the victim here. I'm just kind of wondering if anyone has any advice on how to handle that. Because I was... it fucked me up. Yeah, I get that. I've never dealt with anything like that, so I have no idea. I feel like trying to introduce shreds of normalcy,

maybe, to their life, talking to them, like, without doom and gloom maybe would be helpful? Yeah. I had a fun time talking with him. One of our buddies brought him some chocolate, like one of those assortment truffle boxes. And then I went through the flavor descriptions of the 28 different types of truffles.

And he and I approached that selection as if we were choosing a draft choice. Like, it was so serious, and he was like, wait, read that part again, you know? What do you think Guadena is? Like, oh, absolutely not the raspberry filling. Okay, we're gonna write those four off because they have booze in them.

I mean, it was just like, and that was really fun, but... You're probably like ready to lighten the mood. You're like, oh my God, hey, Shane Gillis just texted me. Oh, a joke. A joke for sure. Oh, no. Oh, God, no. Yeah. So, that was my, that was, yeah. Anyway. And then you bought a suit. No, no.

I bought this last week. It looks so fucking sick. Thank you. I almost feel like this is, wearing it on this show is like beneath the outfit. You know what I mean? We're just dressed like schlubs, and you got this fucking sick ass futuristic outfit on.

Well, I don't know why I bought it. When else are you gonna wear it? I was gonna go into, I went into this store to buy some shoes that I needed, some black shoes, and man, whenever I go into this place, they cast a bit of a spell. I think it has something to do with the incense that they burn in there.

Because of me. Did you do that? I tried on a couple things. I don't like that smell at all. I don't normally either It's a little too intense. Yeah, it's like I don't know. I don't like it There's my walk into a room where they have that I'm like, oh Nasty what about church? What about when they burn in a church? No, I don't like it there either I love it at church I just don't like the smell of it But I do like those pants. And I think they're cool because you can wear them with other shit too.

You don't have to wear the full jumpsuit together. You're right. Yeah. Yeah. I think this is called a set. Yeah. That's what they would call that I believe. Is the shirt from the same place? Same set? Yes. Pricey set. How much did that run you?

I won't say. You gotta say. You gotta be careful. We're in a recession right now Everyone's taking hits The last people that are gonna take hits are the comics people are gonna need to laugh recession proof comedy is I don't know about that I don't know about that either It's actually like one of the first things to go. I'll say- You can just watch it on TV. Yeah, we could go spend money or we could just,

I guess we could just watch, turn the TV on. I had such a fun time in Kansas City. The crowds were awesome. Oh yeah. Really, really great shows. Thank you to everyone who came out. Super, super fun. I like Kansas City. It's an interesting place. Have you spent any time down out. Super, super fun. I like Kansas City.

It's an interesting place. Have you spent any time down there? Yeah, with Ron. You guys went down for that barbecue thing? For the BBQ. Yeah, I gotta say, barbecue, awesome. Don't need to have it more than once. I haven't had it since we went.

In a six month period. I think that even might be a stretch. My heart hurts so much after I eat it. Yeah. And there's no way to not, there's no way to eat a light barbecue lunch. You know what I mean? But people that live in places like that do that.

Like the lunch break, let's go to lunch break, let's hit slaps. Yeah. Take down seven pounds of meat. It's the second fattest city in America. Really? Yeah. What's first?

Philadelphia. No. Yeah. No. That's what they say. It's got to be somewhere in the south. No. That's what I was told.

I mean, I could be wrong. Maybe we should look that up. No. Phil's got a lot of whales running around. Big Dom. Tyler, could you look up the fattest cities in America just to cross reference that? Yeah, Big Dom honestly might bring up the overall average.

He's a big boy. He's fat. Is he fat though or is he just fucking massive? I think he's like defensive tackle fat, so he's got fat on top of muscle. Yeah. Oh, you know what I watched last night? Jackson, Mississippi.

Oh, okay. It was barbecue. I think it's like murder capital. Like there's different metrics that they weigh it by. Yeah. Cause they're big bones down South too. They're not measuring bone density. Which is a massive part of it.

You know what I watched last night was that that Long Island killer dog. Gilgo, I started that one. You didn't finish it? No. Oh, crazy. It didn't really hook me. Oh, it hooked me immediately.

I guess because the women were just whores. Well, that's kind of the whole argument. That's kind of what the whole show's about. What's the argument? You could kill them if they're whores. Because it took them like 20 years to find a dude that they could have found in six weeks because they were prostitutes,

because they didn't give a fuck. Right. Dude, it's insane. You got to watch it. You want me to spoil it? No, no, no. I mean, I remember reading the news report, so don't... Also, there is no spoilers. I'll go back and watch it a little bit. The shit with the cops is insane. And wait, wait. When I say that, I was trying to be funny, but the truth of the matter is, I didn't feel good. I felt kind of gross watching it. I get that with a lot of those docs. Yeah this one I didn't oh, but it's just happens, you know, they were horse. You can't control it. No, like I got the some of those documentaries I'm like, I'm not in the mood for this at all. Yeah turn it off

I didn't know much about last night was in the mood escort service and how that worked No, I didn't really know how it worked either. These women have drivers who drive them around. Yeah. Pimps. Are they pimps or are they like security guys? I guess security probably, but similar.

I think they're hired by the pimps. I'm sure they'll, you know, or maybe they're pimps. Pimps slap one of their girls if they got to. At least shake them up a little bit Can I talk about the cop part? Yeah spoilers People get mad when I spoil things, but it's a documentary, you know, it's It's already been spoiled. I've already been spoiled and also didn't happen that long ago, dude The fucking cop the chief of police in that area of Long Island

was fucking prostitutes and like degrading them. Oh, boy. And that's why the that's why the investigation just like never happened. And then some random drug addicts was like robbing cars in Long Island and accidentally robbed the chief of police's car. And he like stole his briefcase and he like unzipped it. And it was just like all porno and like weird sex toys and like freak shit. And then like immediately like they fired him

and they brought in the FBI and they found the dude in six weeks. It was, that was 12 years going on the investigation. Yeah, it's crazy. Imagine not being able to do freak shit. I know. Getting fired from your police job for doing freak shit He was on some freak shit though big-time hairball

What? You like the freak shit? No, you get real freaky. No, not at all. You're a bit of a freak. Not at all I'm the least freak. I'm into your apartment It's probably from giving birth. I don't see my pelvis more than that. What a moment. I know. Guys, can we talk about RoSparks?

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You should watch it. If you like the Karen Reed one, I think you would like this one. I do like the Karen Reed one. I like it. I like a documentary where, to be honest, where it's not entirely clear what the outcome is or what the right answer is,

that you have to sort of determine your own- Make your own guesses. Conclusion about what happened. Yeah. There's not much of that in this. No, this is pretty cut and dry. This is pretty cut and dry. But it is insane.

It's one of the better true crime docs I've seen in my opinion. All right, well then I'll give it another run. But it might just be because of everything that, like I've, like we've talked about it before, but all those old, like the ones, I don't know, some of them you're like, I'm good. Yeah, I feel like we've moved out of the golden age

of true crime docs. Definitely. And now what we need are, we need good new crimes to happen for them. We covered all the best ones, right? So we need good new crimes to happen, but people are less willing to commit good crimes because they know that documentaries will be made about them.

Yeah. You think they're less willing? I feel like I'd be more willing. Well. Like if you're a serial killer, wouldn't you be like, this is shit, this think they're less willing? I feel like I'd be more willing. Well. Like if you're a serial killer, like, wouldn't you be like, this is shit, this is gonna be on HBO? Like I better get these numbers up, get to work.

Yeah, but I think most, well, do serial, a lot of people say serial killers want to be caught, but I don't know if that's true for everyone. For all of them. I doubt that, yeah. I think my guess would be that most serial killers don't want to be caught. I'd guess that they'd want to kill. There's a serial killer in Massachusetts? Who are they killing?

Everyone. That's never good. How many? What are their numbers? What are their stats? Whoa. Oh, shit. That is pretty good. In Hanover, Hanover mass 12 bodies, three

months. Shit. That's close to my old stomping grounds. That's scary. People got to stop serial killing. But I will say, I think I've said this before many times too, that I thought there was never going to be another serial killer like that. Because I just assumed that the cops would be able to catch them after they killed like one person. But it doesn't seem that that's the truth at all.

All it takes is you just need one of the chief of police to also enjoy killing prostitutes. Look at the ones where, you know, the one that about that rich family in South Carolina. The Murdochs? Yeah. Yeah. It's all about sort of political power. Yeah. That's what determines how long you can get away with that kind of a thing. It's crazy.

I didn't know families like the Murdochs could still existed. Yeah. Where they just fully run a town. But they're not in any office or anything. Where they just fully run a town. But they're not in any office or anything. They're just people. The law doesn't apply. They're kings.

It's literally like the great Gatsby with the fucking white card. Yeah. Where he's going 200 miles per hour and he gets pulled over. He doesn't even get pulled over. The cop's driving trying to pull him over and he just flashes the white card and they just peel out. What's going on? You okay? The cap was fucked.

It's out of nowhere, I don't know what it was. You better, did you fix it? Yeah, I had to lay on my stomach and do a little. Tummy time? I just had to do a little tummy time in the hallway. Shit. It fixed, but I got great news while I was out there. Hank said I should come to the fucking thing.

To the Ryder Cup? Yeah, he texted me out of nowhere. Ryder Cup. There's a mouth. The Ryder. He said let's get Lil Sass in the Ryder Cup. You should come as well and do on course interviews. Nice, that's a great idea.

So he basically was like, he knows that me and you are his handlers basically. And're like, hey, like can we get him this place? I was like, hey, I don't know. I have to send it up to the top and this is north Boston north of Boston. Yeah Maybe maybe 35 40 minutes and I think it's northwest. That's gonna be fun. I'm excited It's great South Shore guy, but I'll come up there. Yeah Can't wait to just get out on the links for a couple days. It was really fun last time. Stress-free.

It was intense. I know. It's like Kirk screaming at you. I'm not ready for that at all. He's going to find all of my deepest insecurities, make them known. Try making a putt. Try making a putt when Kirk's like,

by the way, you talk over people instead of a boy dad. Shane was right. Try making a putt when he tells your parents When Kirk's like, by the way, you talk over people instead of a boy dad. Shane was right. Try making a putt when he tells your parents that you have a crippling weed habit. That's not even funny. Bro, you literally just were outside rolling around on the ground. You should have just laughed at it

and then it would actually be funny instead of just... It's not even funny. It's not even funny. You think I smoke weed? Well, you're fixing your back. I don't know if that's really the tit for tat. I didn't have much to give them. Because you know I don't smoke. You know I'm on the straight and narrow and that the only thing I'm doing, only thing I'm really putting into my body is incense and holy water at church. No, that's good. That does that. You're missing a lot of the, you know, basics. Protein. Fats, carbs. You're saying I lot of the, you know, basics, protein, fats, carbs.

You're saying I don't put those into my body? Yeah. What do you think? If you're just going incense and holy water. What do you think the body and blood? I don't know how sustainable of a diet that is. What do you think the body and blood of Christ are? Well, you didn't say you're eating the body.

Yeah, I'm not putting it into my body. I'm taking it into my soul. Dumbass. Got it. It's so nice when they throw the water at you at church and you just get like fucking boo cocky. I don't like when they do that at all. Man, that just reminded me of one of the earliest jokes

I ever wrote. Take us there. Bring me. Well, I don't really remember it exactly, but I thought that, I thought that to honor the body and blood of Christ, that the wafer was an inadequate food vessel to honor the body of Christ.

Oh yeah. Then you need some Kansas City barbecue. And that like shitty wine was also not, I was like, I said something like, give me a six foot hero and a Capri Sun. That would be closer. That is a good joke. Yeah, something like that.

It was like that. Yeah. Six foot hero and a Capri Sun. Just handing everybody out, huge six foot heroes. Come take a slice. Yeah. Imagine, oh, that would be awesome. Just a pizza.

Everyone get a slice up front. Body's a little greasy today. If Jesus is so fucking magical, he should be like making himself different things every part of the week. La Croix, a nice La Croix in church. We're doing vegan pepperoni today to make sure that all of our flock can indulge

in the bodily. How do you think that goes? Because I'm pretty sure you can just order those things online. The body of Christ. I used to have a fucking 10 of them at my house. Yeah, but aren't they blessed? Yeah.

So is there just a dude at like the Amazon warehouse, just blessing on you? No, they get blessed once you get them. I see. Consecrated, right? Yes. Yeah. But I think that they put them in the same containers

that the peanut butter stuffed pretzels come in. Oh yeah, fucking massive jug. They're in the massive jugs that you get, the cheese balls and the Pub Mix in. Yeah. So nice. But that's the body of Christ in there. I've fried them up on a pan before.

I've like thrown them in. Put some Nutella on them. Make some little mini crepes. It was just like butter. There's not a lot of weight to them to add something. You'd have to kind of layer them out. Yeah, make some little mini tacos. If I ever go on What's for Lunch with Donnie,

I'm definitely having him cook me some crust. When we did, when we were getting... We were doing First Communion, we had to practice with like these, these like, I think they were just those, the wafers. But our teacher just like brought in like a fucking gallon bag of them. Freaky ass teacher just wanted to play something on your tongues? No, they didn't place it on our tongues. So then why'd you need practice?

I don't know, we were fucking seven years old. It was just eating of cracker. Oh, you gotta practice the walk up and then you place your hands. Yeah, but why do you need something? Why don't you just put a poker chip into a hand? Because you're a child and your brain doesn't work fully. You're the only people that were practicing eating Christ.

You're going to be doing, if you decide to raise your kids that way, you'll be doing that. We had a caddy at Macklemore. You're not going to be going, why are you practicing? You don't know how to eat a fucking cracker. I definitely will. No, you won't. You're not wasting crackers on my watch Rank up the the talkover meter get it get it up to another one

Well, I was kind of wondering about what just happened right because I thought Harry was done So then I started saying something different, but he wasn't done now So I didn't know if that meant that I had talked over you we won't count it. We won't count it I don't always know. It'll be a soft count. You're like a warning, written warning. I don't always know when you're done with a thought. I don't either.

I think sometimes you say something, I think you're done, and then you think of like an afterburner firework to tag on top. And so I'm not sure, you know. What's the difference between a hat on a hat and a tag? And a tag? A tag.

A hat on a hat? You know how people at Comic Shop was like, don't put a hat on a hat. I've never heard that. I've never heard that. Like putting a joke on a joke. I've never heard that. I've never heard that ever. Like putting a joke on a joke. I thought you were making an Elon Musk joke. Well, that's why that phrase has kind of bubbled back up

into people's consciousness. People are using it again? No, I think putting a hat on a hat is like making a joke on top of the joke, but a tag is also like a joke adding to a joke. Yeah, usually I think a tag is jokes within a larger joke that lead to the punchline So they're before the punchline not after the punch that's before or after I feel like right

I mean my punchlines usually the end of a joke interesting dumbass No wonder you're not selling any tickets in Philly Chose are already sold out. What? Not all of them. But some. Are you doing radio while you're out there? We'll see.

You might? I might have to. I got some good stations for you to go on. Yeah. I don't think that's how it works. Just go on the morning news. I don't think you can just schedule. You give us 22 minutes, we'll give you the world.

I think it's just they reach out. What were you about to say, Frans, before you were so rudely interrupted? I can't remember, and you know what? There was something about a hat on a hat phrases. It's probably for the best. That was you, Ron. Why don't I ask Microsoft Copilot

what it means to put a hat on a hat? What's Microsoft Copilot? Are you serious? Is that like one of the new AIs? Do you watch Nathan Fielder? Do you watch his new show? No, but I've heard, I heard it. The rehearsal?

The rehearsal is great. It's incredible. Yeah. That's what everyone's saying. I can't fathom how he pulls off what he does. They have so much money to throw at it. He's staging the most elaborate things that I've ever seen. So is it real?

Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's blending fake with real, right? But the people, the problems he's trying to solve... They're real. ...are real problems. Yeah. I got to watch it. I heard it's so good.

Have you ever watched the first season? Yeah. Pretty solid. Yeah, I watched it. I heard it's so good. Have you ever watched the first season? Yeah. Pretty solid Yeah, I watched it. I used to worship his whole catalog. Do you think this season's better than the first? I'm only one episode in That's what the streets have been saying. It's really really I mean, he's brilliant. Yeah, he's very funny I'm more of a Tommy Smokes guy Really? in the Smokes v. Fiedler Yeah, same type of comedy basically.

I just think Tommy's way better at it than Nathan Fielder. Have you ever watched Love on the Spectrum? I need someone to watch Love on the Spectrum. I have a hard time with it. You think it's exploitative? I don't know what it is. There's just something about it where I can't quite get to the feel-good part of it. I'm not quite feeling good about it. I don't know, I've never watched it. Rowan's obsessed about it where I can't quite get to the feel good part of it. I'm not quite feeling good about it. I don't know. I've never watched it. Rowan's obsessed with it. There's something about it where I don't think it's right.

It would be, I don't know, like watching midget porn. Maybe there's just something. Midget boxing. Yeah. Yeah. It exploitative feels like the right word. Interesting. But you people are finding love. How much are they getting paid? I mean, the one lady was just on the damn Kelly Clarkson show singing the song that

she wrote. These guys are getting famous. They're getting laid. They're getting everything. I saw the guy who was so excited to see Jack Black on maybe. Yes. And that, when they met, felt again, just, you know, why are we observing this? They're saying it's like the new JFL, New Faces.

It's an outlet. Yeah, I heard Kill Tony's just kind of mind talent. Yeah. Kill Tony's a direct pipeline to Love on the Spectrum. Oh man, it's such a good, it feels, to me it feels so good to watch. Really? No part of it feels exploitative, that's what I was saying to him last time. That it doesn't, like the music is nice and like none of the editing makes it feel like

you're making fun of them, makes you feel like you're like kind of one with them. I feel their purity? I understand both sides of it, and I understand that this is normalizing people on the spectrum, which is great. And in a similar way that if you want it, if you had a role in a movie that was for a handicapped person, casting an actor who is, who has that handicapped is better than putting

Leonardo DiCaprio. Exactly. In a wheelchair or something like that. I get that, right? Yeah. If they had just a bunch of random people without autism or whatever, pretending to have autism for a reality show, that would be bad. That would be a problem. Yeah. That would not be good. I'm sure there's at least one that snuck its way on.

Little, what's that movie with Johnny Knoxville? The Ringer. Yeah. I've never seen it. The Ringer. Yeah, is that what he does? It's a pretty good movie. Do they do that?

Well, he goes and competes, he pretends to have, to be mentally handicapped in order to compete in the Special Olympics. But imagine if someone pretended to have to be on the spectrum just to go have sex with people. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure there's there's got to be. I mean, how many seasons are there? Three. Fourth season, though, there will be one.

I think they've had them pretty good. Shows getting too big. Yeah, but that I think that that would be less of a chance. I think it's like if it was the Wild West, maybe somebody could sneak on. I think someone's gonna get on with the right agent. Well, what would the, like, I mean, what would the caper be?

We got an audition for you. Do you think they have to send in a self-tape? Yeah. Just be like, show off your skill. I can name all of the, I know all the houses from Game of Thrones. It's so fucking good. It's so, I mean, all the characters are so likable. And you'd think that because a lot of them haven't been able to find love up to like whatever 35 years in life that they'd be picky or that they wouldn't be picky that they would but a lot of them like will be like hey you're not for me you're

not what I'm looking for you're not outgoing enough or hmm they're probably are they all super straightforward some of them are but some of them have like coaches who have to tell them hey these are the things that you should say if you're not into someone I think we should just be friends. Or I had a really nice time. See, that feels weird. They have coaches. Yeah, who are also on the spectrum.

That sounds like the show, Maid? Yeah, it's a bit Maidish. Dating coach? Yeah, the Maid coach. It's kind of like that. And their coaches are also autistic. Yes, but like a different flavor of autism. Man, there was a girl from Maine when I was in high school

who got on Made, and I only found out because I was doing the One Act Festival, which was like an acting festival, a theater in high school, and it was competition. So you'd rehearse your play and then you'd go do it. And this girl was from, you know, the middle of nowhere Maine. But everyone would come up when we would all talk

and say, like, yeah, she was on... she was on made. What was she trying to be made into? Made? I think she was trying to become... she was, like, very shy and then wanted to be prom queen or something like that. That's always how it works. There's a shy person, they do exposure therapy.

Yeah. They were trying to get her to be prom queen. And I don't know if it was prom queen or something. And she didn't get it? I think she might've, probably. I mean, when you have an entire MTV camera crew running around, it tends to tip the hand of the voters in favor.

That would piss me off if I was the deserving prom queen so much. Yeah. If you were the voters in favor. That would piss me off if I was the deserving prom queen so much. Yeah. If you were the baddest bitch. If you spent your four years being the baddest bitch, like cultivating bad bitch and then. Yeah, but that girl went on to get like good work at Denny's and you know, the girl on maid is,

nobody knows what she's doing. Yeah, I guess so. This was by the way, I think it was like Oxford Hills, Maine, was the name of the town. Can we find the app? We should look that up. What if you were in it? I met the girl, I talked to her at the festival.

Oh really? Yeah, and she was like downplaying it. She was like, yeah, they, I mean, didn't really do that much for me. I was gonna win anyway. Yeah, it was like, I don't know, a lot of it was kind of bullshit. Like the edit didn't really come out

the way I wanted it to. Like, they made so much of a big deal about the fact that I was, like, barely talking to this guy. Like... I swear to you, it was that type of a conversation. Meanwhile, we're at the nerdiest thing you could possibly be at. The One Act Theater Festival is theater kids. And, I mean, across the board, like acapella circles

were breaking out. Yeah. People brought devil sticks. What is that? To kill time. You ever see devil sticks? Oh, like the Chinese yodeling? Yeah, there was a guy...

No, no, no, it's like two sticks, and then there's like a longer stick with dreadlocks in the middle, and you smack it back in the... Oh, dreadlocks. I have seen that, yeah. Doesn't it have like, isn't there a little bit of a... Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've seen that. There was always a talent show that would happen at the end that would sort of break out and some of the people had some talent.

What did you perform? Well, I would MC it. Really? Yeah. That's the role you were born to play. Yeah, I would MC it. Would you do it well? Yeah, I made sure everyone got excited and, you know, brought the noise up.

When was this? High school. Damn. You were MCing in high school? Yeah, I still have my sweatshirt from it. Listen, if you had a monogrammed main One Act Festival regional championship. That's crazy. You were MCing when you were in high school.

I was in the One Act, but I just like, I had the... You had the chops. Charisma to go on stage and be like, all right everybody, who's got some talent? But there was no selectivity to it. So people were just coming up in a theater of 400 people. Do you think that, did that have anything to do with your, like you said your dad does stuff like that, right?

No. Or he speaks? He memorized the speech and did it at the talent show in Florida. Yeah. That has nothing, those are completely disconnected. He didn't do that when you were younger. If you want to go that route, I see your reasoning.

I would say that the career I've chosen is more in line with the hereditary Outspokeness I received from my dad. Yeah Yeah, understood. That must be so nice That how often your parents come see you do comedy never why? Because I tell them not to yeah, I do the same What what do they say? I tell them not to watch anything that I'm the same. What, and what do they say? I tell them not to watch anything that I'm in.

Really? Same, they don't listen though. Yeah, because I want to know what you're on. They listen to like the pod, I actually, I don't even know if my parents listen to the podcast. My parents don't know that I have a podcast. I'm not even kidding you.

They thought my show with Dana was a podcast. Well. And they referenced that, they referenced that and they say, how's the podcast going? And I'm like, it's pretty good. Are you watching it? They're like, yeah, you guys just did black holes. I'm like, yes, yes.

The podcast is going great. Little do they know, I spend two hours a week talking to you guys about fucking. Yeah. Spectrum love and fucking. 9-11, pretty much all the time. Yeah, they could find it. Mm-hmm Yeah, no my pair. I have your I mean, I'm assuming your parents have seen you do comedy though They have they've been to Boston. They came and saw me at the Wilbur when I did the special there

They must have been proud of you. My dad in the concession line was talking to some guys My boy have I ever told you the story when I got hired at Barstool? My grandma was this is when they lived on Cape Cod. But my grandma was like people were at her house doing yard work or some shit. And they were listening to like ESPN radio or some some shit like that. And my grandma went outside and was like, do you guys know Lil Sasquatch? To like the crew of workers?

Yeah. And they were like, no, I don't. And they were like, what? And she was like, they were like, he does sports stuff too. It's so funny because she like genuinely is like proud of you and just wants to share her pride in you. And you're like,

fucking idiot, grandmom thought that. No, no, not at all. You got the wrong idea. So explain it to me. You got the wrong idea. Explain it to me then. It's not at all what I was saying. I was saying it was funny.

Funny story. Yeah, why? My mom told me the story laughing. Yeah, why? It was a funny story. Why is it funny? Because there was no way that those dudes would know who I was.

And your grand grandma thought so highly Of you that she was just trying to connect with strangers over your success Subjectively funny to have my grandma go out and ask who I am and then a bunch of Mexican dudes said we have no idea What you're talking about. Hold on a second sass. You said objectively funny. I don't think anything in humor That is really objective funny humor entirely until now subjective. I would say yeah until now Till I made the perfect joke You've set you you've planted the flag on the moon The flag come up comedy everyone on earth will find that story funny. I thought it was funny

I did Rome had a whole different idea on it. Yeah, because it's not objectively funny. Oh, it's subjectively funny It's objectively funny if he didn't find it funny, that makes it subjective. Well, I just thought it was mean-spirited towards your grandma. But I know he thinks it's funny. Now that's what I get why you can't watch Love on the Spectrum because you can't help but to laugh at people who you deem to be less fortunate or intelligent than you. Less fortunate? Why would I call an autistic person less fortunate?

I said you deem them. But it sounded like you were projecting, because those words have never come out of my mouth. How would I project because you clearly think it's hilarious to watch autistic people try to fall in love? There's the sweetest thing ever yeah, that's what everyone says that watches that show they're like no, but it is really sweet It's like no you're at home crying laughing with fucking chips all over your chest laying on the couch laughing with fucking chips all over your chest laying on the couch. Everyone that watches that show, they're like, it's actually, I know what you think. Yes, but it is very touching. No, that's how I am with Little People, Big World and 600 Pound Life.

Okay. Oh man, 600 Pound Life, I can't watch that either. Why? Because it's too touching? Oh man, I just... Well, they make that seem really sad. Like, the music's sad. Like, the editing is sad. They... the camera angle is literally one foot away from their stomach with their face in the background.

Like, they make people look... They make everyone's shower ass naked for them. Did you see the one with the redheaded guy who just plays video games all the time? Uh, probably. His name's Nate. It's Harry's Nate. What if it was just all along? Like, the guy that Hairball games with who lived in Maine.

Like, had to... My friend. It's not just a guy that I gave my entire life. They had to leave Maine because they didn't have enough wheelchair access ramps. Yeah, they had to drive down to Houston so we could get lap band surgery. There weren't enough wheelchair-enabled TCB-WISE. It is interesting, like, you would think gaming

is like a direct pipeline to weight gain, but a lot of the gamers are like just skinny dudes. This guy in this episode was, whatever, 600 pounds or something, and he can't wear clothes because he gets too hot. He sits in the middle of his bed and his dad... I think you've told me about this. His dad brings him lunch or I think it's his dad.

His parents are divorced and his mom doesn't want him to be so fat. But the dad's like bringing him dogs every day. But the dad says, the food makes him happy. I don't know. I mean, obviously, But the dad's like, bringing him donuts every day. But the dad says like, the food makes him happy, I don't know. I mean, obviously I know it's not good for him, but like it seems to be the only thing that makes him happy. And his dad goes to get him McDonald's.

Yeah. And he comes back with a bag of McDonald's and the guy who's naked. Does he at least have like a sheet over his? No, he's fully naked, but his stomach hangs over his genitals. Oh, so you can't see it. You can't enjoy it. He reaches into the bag and he had a specific order that he wants and he goes, well, I think you're going

to have to go back. They didn't bring the right thing. They didn't bring, they didn't give you the double filet of fish. There's a mistake in the order. Yeah, and he goes back, right? I think he goes back or sacrifices his own lunch so that the kid can do it. His own maccas?

I think that none of those people exist without the enabler, and that's the real villain of all the stories. That's what I've learned from that. Yeah. And by by that sort of side of it, you could argue that the government is enabling because I think a lot of them are on disability. Couldn't you say, though, that like. Some people are just born to eat.

I'm born to eat. I'm. But you've seen the way I eat. I you're not, though. Yeah, you are. You've seen the way I eat. I've seen the way you eat, but you're not born to eat. Like, I don't know what you're even talking. We're talking about the dudes that are 900 pounds. OK. Clearly, you're not born to eat.

I eat voraciously. But if you were born to eat, you wouldn't be skin. You wouldn't. But I just eat healthy food, but I eat humongous quantities of it. Yeah. But I'm talking about like a real eater. Yeah. But that's not true because two of the best eaters of all time, the best male eater of all time and the best female eater of all time, Joey Chestnut, not super fat, and Sonia Thomas, the Black Widow, not super fat.

Kobayashi, ripped. Yeah. It's true, Kobayashi was ripped. I mean, yeah, I guess that's true. You're thinking of- But you think you could like out eat one of those guys? I don't know. I'm not sure about that. I'm just saying that

Most people know me Like when I go over to people's houses for dinner parties, they prepare Yeah, I've gone to dinner with you and you do eat a lot like when we went to get those steaks in Wisconsin Yeah, I think me and MOOC had like half of ours and you Did the dishes. I licked everyone's plate clean. Francis is coming. Yeah. Throw another full hog on the...

I've always, I've always, my whole life, I've always eaten enormous amounts of food, but I just eat healthy food and I exercise like a madman. My parents used to call me nibbles. I know that's not a lie. I swear to God. I know it's not a lie. Just very peckish. Cause I wouldn't eat anything. You're very peckish.

I don't think I'm even like, yeah, I would say I am peckish. Yeah, but I'm not like, I'm not, but I wouldn't say I'm a picky eater. I don't think I really am. I am, I am. I am peckish, but I'm not a picky eater. You just don't eat very much of stuff? I just don't eat, unless I'm it really is. I am, I am. I am peckish, but I'm not a picky eater. You just don't eat very much of stuff? I just don't eat, unless I'm like really hungry.

Like I don't usually sit down and eat the full meal at once. You say you can- I bop, I bop around. You're a grazer? I'm a grazer. I eat over time. I collect my calories as the day goes on, through the night.

But you do eat, do you eat at, you know, three in the morning? No, no, no. But you're up till four, But you do eat at, you know, three in the morning? No, no, no. But you're up till four, so you have dinner at... I'm up till like 2.30 usually. You eat dinner at what time? Be honest. It really depends on the day.

Sometimes midnight? Not really. That's like worst case scenario. Sometimes like 10. 10, 11? But also like I usually aim for like seven. Okay. So that's what I was wondering. But then dinner too rolls in around 10. Something's going in the stomach around 10 for sure. That's what I was wondering.

100%. There's no way that you or anyone I know could eat dinner at seven o'clock and then not be hungry again by four a.m. No, yeah, I definitely get it. But I'll snack. That's what I'm wondering. Yeah, so you do eat quite late.

I do, and I don't really get that hungry during the day, which is a problem. Yeah, you are doing the opposite with your metabolism from what every medical journal has ever said to do. Yeah, they say you're supposed to eat right when you wake up to jumpstart it, right? Well, I think it's that and it's also like, don't eat late and don't snack.

Yeah, I do all those things. Eat smaller meals throughout the day. Oh, I do that. I eat smaller meals throughout the day, but then I just eat a big meal. Like all I've had today is overnight oats. I'm fine with that Well, it's now it's four. Yeah, you should have had lunch, but I would have had lunch around too if we weren't recording

Bad some spicy ramen today. I went to a ramen restaurant. It was so fucking nice. That's great You had spicy ramen on Monday. No, I had spicy ramen the day that my oh, yeah birth And I was craving it. I think it was cause we talked about it. Yeah, probably. Boy, it sounds, I love ramen. Maybe I'll get some ramen tonight. We should go to that place around the corner. Yeah, we should.

Well, not today. Not today. Probably never, realistically. You don't like going to lunch with your bros? Casey Neistat has a standing lunch with his bros every day. Every day? Well, not the weekends, but Monday through Friday,

he's just standing lunch with the guys that he works with. I saw him walking around Tribeca one time and I said, hey, Casey, big fan. I'm not. Hey Casey, I've seen you. I actually- I respect his work. I like Casey Neistat. I like Casey Neistat and I respect his work,

but I can't say that I'm a big fan, but I still said it. Yeah. Which to me is really like, that's pandering. You ever watch his first class ticket reviews? They're great. Unbelievable. Those are really good. But if you watch the ones where it's like $25,000 ticket,

like that one where it's, those are sick. Shower on the plane. Those are awesome. And then the, when he went sort of like toed behind a car when New York snowed, And he was doing like... Oh, I did see that. That was cool. Yeah, that video is sick.

And then the one that he did the bike lane where he was like, he got a ticket for riding not in the bike lane on his bicycle. And he said, well, there's always stuff in the bike lane that you run into. And then he just to prove the point, biked in the bike lane and crashed into everything, including a cop car. Really? Yeah. That's crazy.

That was very funny. Those were his, the viral videos I remember seeing early on of him. I watched his shit when he was doing, I didn't watch all of them, but when he used to do like the, cause he was like the first person to do like the daily vlog.

And I watched some of those. But yeah, he's his stuff was good. He's got to be a problem in person. Why? It's like I was just thinking about like that, like those videos, like the Emirates where it's like he takes the shower. But it's like, it's not like he's just

walking into the bathroom. It's like he walks into the bathroom. Cameras are there's like multiple angles set up already. Yeah. And meanwhile, there's someone else who's like, I got to take a shit. And this dude's filming a fucking movie in the bathroom, cameras are, there's like multiple angles set up already. And meanwhile there's someone else who's like, I gotta take a shit and this dude's filming a fucking movie in the bathroom right now.

It might be the case that each person who has one of those seats gets their own bathroom. I don't know for sure. Really? I'm not certain of that. It might be, oh, you know what I think, they might have to schedule times. Yeah, cause they clean the bathroom after each person uses it.

Damn. It's at best, at worst it's that. Yeah, but that whole style of vlogging where it's like car pulling out of the parking garage. You got to set up your camera. And it's like then you got to, you know, park the car, go get the camera. Mm-hmm. Edit around yourself like looking at the camera as you pick it up. Is this thing fucking working? God damn it, this thing fucking working? Yeah. God damn it, this thing never fucking works. He edits the shit out of his videos, though. Yeah.

They're so well edited. It's fucking insane. All right, should we wrap it up? I guess we've been going for a while. Yeah, we can wrap it up. I got to get home to my seat. When can we come visit them? I wanted you to visit them.

I mean, I have them all day tomorrow because Allison has to go to fucking Delaware to deal with some court shit. Whoa. Yeah, I got to get vaccinated. I'll be in Dallas at the Addison Improv. Wanna just do these, let's splice these in earlier. What? Wanna splice these in earlier?

Road dates. Oh, sure. Right? Like let's do them with the ad reads because no one's making it. We're like two hours in. Fair enough. Right? I feel like that's a it, we're like two hours in. Fair enough. Right?

I feel like that's a more, really? Audio, yeah. Yeah. Like audio elements in the car. Yeah. I feel like most other podcasts do them like, I mean I don't think we can do them right off the top. But I think we could do them

with like the first ad read or something. All right. I'll be in Dallas at the Addison Improv this, not this weekend, but next weekend. So that's like May 15th, 16th, 17th, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Tickets at punchup.live slash Francis Ellis. Also be in Chicago at Zany's in June,

first weekend of June, June 7th, 8th, 9th, something like that. So same spot for tickets. I just got booked there. Hmm? I just got booked there for the fall. Awesome. Chi-rac.

You gonna do Rosemont? I think so, yeah. Probably the way I'd do it, right? I don't know. I haven't looked at the deal yet. But I'm gonna be in Philly this weekend. Five shows. Some of them are already sold out.

So don't wait till the last minute, get them now. harrysettlewebsite.com, my other website, lilsatswatchwebsite.com, no longer exists. So don't go there. Go to harrysettlewebsite.com or go to the philahelium website. Thank you. I'm sorry. Still underground So I looked older Till you came around I was only falling one way

I was only falling one way Days were drifting For was I So, so then you listen Now I come alive I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way

I was only falling one way Finished to your eye Did you realize No one could take me alive I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way Seeing just a distant light Feeling fast forever bright

Calling just a distant light, feel fast forever bright, call it just a memory, take my hand and you can see I'm falling Now fall Now fall Now fall Now fall Now fall When the world is finished to your eyes Did you realize no one could take me alive