Son of a Boy Dad - GARDINI - Son of a Boy Dad #139

Episode Date: October 10, 2023

GARDINI - Son of a Boy Dad #139 -- Sas & Rone are joined by Shawn Gardini to discuss current events/his plans for the future, Sas' fishing, Rone's nightmare "concert" & more -- Ad: Download the Gametime app or go to https://gametime.co, enter your email, and redeem code BOYDAD for $20 off your first purchase (terms apply). -- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. All right, ready? What is up, everybody? Welcome back to Son of a Boy Dad Podcast. Today it is Monday, October 9th. We are joined by Sean Gardini.ini hello thank you for having me thank you for being

here my brother how are you gentlemen absolutely fantastic good an absolute mitzvah of you to come in early on a fucking monday like this i hate mondays bright and early we were supposed to have we're supposed to have lamar in here too He shaved his face and I was afraid to appear on camera. He's too ugly for a podcast. He's too ugly for an audio form. That's fucking crazy. No, we love LaMera, but he lied to us. Well, LaMera also asked to do the show.

Did he? Yeah. I don't think he's lying, but he could have definitely taken a train instead of driving. Yeah, he did ask. I said, he came up to me at Skank Fest and said, can I do Son of a Boy Dad again? And I said, yeah, why don't we have you and Gardini on together? And yeah, doors always open. And now we got Gardini.

Because we move tickets, bro. We move fucking units out here. Yeah, that's what he said. He said he had a bunch of people come out to his show and said that they found him on Son of a Boy Dad. He does do his own shows. I still don't do that. I'm a supporting act still. I could always be a supporting act, I think. It's nice, though. You could kind of capture people

being a supporting act. It's the best thing in the world. I was so pressed. You just do 20 minutes. To do all of my material. Empty the clip every time. Not a bullet left in the chamber every single time it's sick though people are catching on to my tricks they yell at me after shows no i saw you say that before maybe in probably only in philly though right yeah yeah yeah but i mean what the

fuck do they expect if they're coming to multiple of your shows that they're not gonna yeah get that foot up there brother there you go come on stiff ass legs those things drop like i get a lot of movement hear those things cracking when you're moving them my god like a puppet jesus christ this gabbo dude just sitting on a fucking ventriloquist's lap. It's a good look, though. What's good, bro? Where did you get that coffee from? That looks like the- Bagels and Brew.

Shout out Bagels and Brew Astoria. Yeah. How nice. That's the family over there. Yeah. Little local shop. Local shop. I actually got a bager, too.

Nice. A little mom and pop action. A little mom and pop, yeah. got a bigger too. Little mom and pop action. Little mom and pop. That is the quintessential coffee cup from like a shitty like Greek place or something

like that. It's camouflage for some reason. Yeah. In case it needs to crawl through the bush. In case it needs to fight Hamas. Hamas is crazy. Yeah, you want it to speak your mind? It's to say free Palestine in a public forum. Oh, no, you're free in Palestine?

Dude, F the Zionists. Yeah. F them to hell. Even though they don't believe in that. I have no, I don't know anything about it, dude. I was trying to figure it out last night. Nobody does, I don't. I was texting my parents asking what side I should be on.

Because I saw the New Jersey Devils are supporting Israel now. And I was like, I saw Julian Edelman. All of the sports teams are tweeting out that they support Israel. But it sounded like what the people from Palestine just want their freaking land back. I guess there's nothing that I'm going to be able to say about a 2000 year

old conflict that's going to like illuminate it. People are probably already mad at what I just said. But they don't know that you're that I'm a Jew. Yeah. Ethnically a Jew. Yeah. Well, I don't really know much about it. I mean, I will say

I appreciate how how fired up Palestine is about their land. Like I feel like if like I feel like if someone stole my land even like 10 years ago, I would be like, all right. Like the Native Americans

aren't putting up a fight anymore. No, they gave up fast. The Native Americans, imagine if they were still fighting, dude. Imagine if they were fucking still

up in arms. They probably would if they could. Yeah, true. Take care of those boys quick. Light work. I remember when I first found out that we did that to them, I was shocked. Yeah. I was like, Yeah, true. We took care of those boys quick. Lightwork.

I remember when I first found out that we did that to them, I was shocked. Yeah. There was like a graphic in a book that I had of Christopher Columbus like chopping off their arms. Speaking of that, it is Italian Heritage Day. Yeah, today is Columbus Day. It is, yeah. It used to be called Columbus Day. Now it's called Italian Heritage Day and it's slash Indigenous Peoples Day. I was going to say, I don't know.

I've never heard Italian Heritage Day before. It was on my calendar. It had Italian Heritage Day slash Indigenous Peoples Day. I was going to say, I don't know. I've never heard Italian Heritage Day before. It was on my calendar. It had Italian Heritage Day slash Indigenous Peoples Day. My dad visited this weekend and he was like, he was like banging the drum for Columbus.

He was like, it's wrong what, it's wrong what they did to Columbus that they're taking his name off. Because his argument was like, it was like normal at the time. Like that's what everybody thought at the time that these people were savages. Yeah. argument was like it was like normal at the time like that's what everybody thought

at the time that these people were savages yeah I was like wait Israelis are still doing it

yeah I was like what's your argument about slavery that was pretty fucking normal at the time too for those folk

I also didn't know that Israel had such a powerful military yeah dude because there's we support Israel as a country.

Yeah. It's because we're also like sending over like every 19 year old to go over there. Like everybody has to do a year conscription. Yeah. So there's probably like 18 year old Jewish folks from America who thought they were on like Rumspringer to have like a fuck fest and get bottle service or something. Yeah. Who now have like ak thrust into their

hands yeah yeah they gotta find them the videos were crazy waking up on saturday morning all those videos a lot of them like twitter is just like the most misinformation ever yeah someone posted a video of like the people they were like hamas parachuting into israel and then everyone was like this is not even from that it's just from like 10 years ago. This is a screen grab of Call of Duty. Yeah. This was Red Dawn. This is from the Red Dawn movie when North Korea landed in the US. Just like pixelated.

It's not even real human beings in it. Ukraine's got to be pretty pissed. Yeah, they are getting understolen right now. Yeah. It's about to dry up real fucking fast. I went to a restaurant and they had a ukraine flag and they said this should be an israel flag they straight up said that really yeah and i was like or it could just be nothing right i feel like you don't really need to support which

side of the war that is not in the united states that you're on you don't really need to be vocal about it i know i wonder what it is about people that want that is that that's got to be that next level white guilt or some shit it has to be because posting an instagram story being like what's happening in israel is bad it's not doing anything for anybody right like no one's like seeing that being like oh shit we got to stop them like it's not like joe biden saw some fucking instagram story of supporting israel being like okay now i get it. What is this? Yeah.

The fuck is this? Yeah. But it is very shocking that they're doing this all as the Michelle Obama's a man stuff is coming out. Yes. One hand is fucking over here. I know. It's the,

uh, what's it called? It's an optical illusion. It really is. Dude, that's been going on for a while though. The, uh, not Israel, Palestine. No, that's been going on for a while, though. The not Israel-Palestine, you know.

It has been going on for a while. It has been going on for a while. But the Michelle Obama being a man thing. I remember my friends showing me pictures of her penis when I was like in like ninth grade. Like it was like that. There was a meme and it was like her wearing a dress with a bulge. Yeah. And everyone was like, this is her dick.

Really? Yeah. a dress with a bulge. Yeah. And everyone was like, this is her dick. Really? Yeah.

Because even trans folks who have, you know, that situation, they kind of make their penis disappear. Like they could slip into a bikini and the penis

isn't even there. They tuck it and they probably tape it to the gooch. Yeah. Clouded dust. You think they're even taping it?

Yeah. You think that if, this is slippery, but do you think that if you have a small penis, it's easier to go trans? Like if you have like an abysmally small penis, you're just like... It was barely there anyway.

I'm pretty sure they just duct taped the hell out of that thing. I'm serious. I'm serious. I'm not trying to be like a jerk or nothing. Really? They just duct taped the hell out of it. What do you mean? Like the trans people,

they duct tape it down? They mush it all into into their grunge area. No, they probably wear spandex. No, because they wear bikinis. I talked to someone this weekend that talked to a trans, I don't know why I air quoted it, a trans

model or something like that, and they were showing bikini pics and it was flat as a fucking runway, dude. It was probably chopped. No, it was flat as a fucking runway dude it was like fucking but yeah it was probably chopped no it was still there says who the person who was with them the person who made love to them yeah yeah but it was like so it was just like completely i think you could plug it into your own ass that's what i was thinking i assume it's a tuck down yeah and in like you i assume you probably just get the tip and you tape it to the gooch.

I figure you just push it like the pump-up sneakers or something like that. Yeah, yeah. You let the air out and it shrivels back in. I'm sure this is what people wanted to hear. It probably is what they wanted to hear. They're probably pumped right now. Finally, they're off of Israel and Palestine. Let's get down to the real stuff.

What trans people do with their dicks while wearing bikinis. Bro, were you at Skankfest? Yeah, I was. Of course he was. He was the fucking main act. You should have seen this guy, dude. We walked around together. We went and got breakfast on Friday, and then we

walked around, and it's just every guard dog. Gardini. Yeah? Yeah. How was it? It was fun? You had a good time? It was fun. You got a little sick. I got a little sick, yeah. Really? Kahuna sent me with a...

Oh, he blessed you with one to go disperse to the people? Your own smallpox blanket. Yeah. To give to the skanks out there. Everyone got sick. I didn't get sick because I'm a fucking road warrior, but they all got sick because they're not used to the road life. Yeah, you're unkillable. Yeah, they all got everyone.

Everyone. People were losing their voice after the first night. Yeah. It's like all we did last night was just hang out for two hours. What happened? How hard were you partying? Were you getting after it? I mean, you know me. Partying. Shots?

Yeah, a little bit of wigsky. Shots? Just a concoction of psychedelics. I was on a concoction of psychedelics at one point. Your penis was exposed. Yes. Yeah.

Dude, someone actually made me stickers. And one of them says, I got pantsed at Skank Fest. What do you mean made you stickers? Some guy, he brought them to the Portland shows. He had like a shit ton of stickers. Oh, really? Yeah. He made them fresh?

Yeah. You got to make it into like tattoos, jackets, merch. I know. We got to capitalize. Actually, I have them with me right now. Were you at the fresh. Yeah. You got to make it into like tattoos, jackets, merch. I know. We got to capitalize on that. Actually, I have them with me right now. Were you at the show? Yeah. So you saw his penis? I don't think you saw mine.

I think he was in the green room. I was in the green room, but I would have loved to see it. The news of that. Maybe at a skank fest. I'll get the chance to see it. He's going to do a whole cock out fest. I went to skank fest and all I got was molested by my friend. I call him Terrell.

All I got was exposed badly. That's what happened. They ambushed me and made me go on stage on like a concoction of psychedelics. And I was so ashamed of what I did up there because I was, it was pretty bad. Didn't sound like, I didn't really listen. All I know is I was sitting behind the stage and all of a sudden Columns was like, let's get Sean up here. Yeah. And no one's like, Sean's

not even like there. I was like, what is Columns plan with this? I think he was just hoping that someone would hear him, which I did. And I was like, yeah, I was like, Gardini, they're asking for you on stage. And I was like, no. Do I have to go? Yeah. The producer later was like, yeah. And I was like, let i have to go yeah the producer later was like yeah and i was like let's

get sean gardini up here a slow talking mick dude yeah he just kept saying it over and i went out there and i didn't know what to say i didn't know i didn't want to do jokes i was just looking at everybody sort of nervous dude even being a little high off weed i don't get high on weed and do stand-up really. Right, that's what I mean. That's enough to be inside your own head. Even a single psychedelic would be bad. A concoction of psychedelics? I was on psilocybin and LSD.

Good God. I opened by saying that I was on psilocybin and LSD and that all I could think about was how I wanted to kill the president of the United States. That worked. after that, I was just trying to talk to the audience members and they weren't listening. So then Sam talent went on the God, Mike.

Oh yeah. I forgot about that. Conscious. Yeah. It was like, they're laughing at you, Sean. They're not laughing. Yeah. Completely.

That was hilarious. No. Yeah. The people liked it. I was a little spun out, but now it's, it's hilarious. No. Yeah. But the people liked it. I was a little spun out, but now it's fine. Damn. What about the, or which one did you do first, or was it simultaneous? The mushies were first.

And it wasn't enough? LSD afterwards, no. The mushies weren't enough. Because I did the mushies the day before. So you had a little bit of a tolerance. Yeah. So I was embarrassed about that. But then when Sass got molested in front of all those people, it kind of really

took... It makes it all go away. It made all my sadness go away. You stood in front of him with that. You took the bullets for me. Yeah, I did. It was crazy. That was a wild moment. Yeah, dude. People are still talking about it.

He's talking about it. No, no. I was hearing about it this weekend. Really? From who? Everybody. Everybody and their mama talking about it. Well, he's talking about it. No, no. I was hearing about it this weekend. Really? From who? Everybody. Who? Everybody. Everybody and their mama talking about it. No, wait, wait. People weren't even talking about it there.

On their podcast. Also, I was listening to you guys had Norman and Ari on. Oh, yeah. They talked about your druggies on that. Yeah. You were also doing, you didn't want to share that story with us? No, because I didn't do drugs. I had a cold snack.

I had a cold. I had one cold, one ice cold fatty. Yeah. That doesn't even count, dude. That's like fucking the worst drug for you. I literally did one. It's and now all the people are like tweeting at me being like, I'm like, anyone know any good fishing spots in Portland?

And like, have you tried whip it? And it's like, dude, Iets before? And it's like, dude, I'm not like, it's not, this is something that I'm like embarrassed by. Cause they're like legal. But yeah,

I was at the Eagles game and people were doing them last weekend. And dudes turn into for 30 seconds, the heroin zombies that you see on fuck. Like you're seeing dudes like really? Yeah. You get completely standing up. I just do one And I just started

I just laughed really hard Yeah I freaked out at first Because I was doing I did it with Ari And I said I was like how long does this last And he said 30 seconds

And then I just started laughing And then it weared off And then I went back away Did you say it funny? Yeah That's the best part It was fun It was a good time

Damn How did they convince you to do it? They didn't I saw them doing it And I said can I do one please please sir they were doing that and i said can i do one and then they were like yeah but we got to go somewhere private they like brought me up to this like dungeon above the festival literally it was like it was like it was like this like cold concrete room above the venue the whip and it was just every and they were like sit down before you do this and i was like this like cold concrete room above the venue. The whip. And it was just every,

and they were like, sit down before you do this. And I was like, this feels a little extreme. It sounds like an opium. What were you unconscious at all? No, I was completely,

it was literally, it was 30 seconds. And I was like, all right, I'll see you guys. That was it. That was the extent of the entire thing. I've said to friends,

they just go like, you fall for like 10 seconds and they're like, whoa, that was awesome. That's crazy, yeah. Their brain shuts down. What even is it? It's nitrous.

Nitrous? Yeah. What is nitrous used for? Airsoft guns? I think like balloons. I believe it's nitrous, right? Yeah, it is nitrous. It's used for like whipped cream.

So that's what you used to do when you were a kid. You just, you know, like you shoot the whipped cream. Yeah. But the air's what you used to do when you were a kid you'd just you know like you'd shoot the whipped cream yeah but the air comes out not the cream yeah

you just take the air interesting that's what I used to do as a youth it's fun I never did that as a youth it's gotta be because in health class

they told us that you would die instantly if you did it they told yeah they said that it was like it was a tolls on your brain yeah that's what they said it's like cutting a massive

fucking chunk out of your brain yeah I mean it makes sense but at the same time that's that it was like... With the toes in your brain. Yeah. Yeah. That's what they said. It's like cutting a massive fucking chunk out of your brain. Yeah, I mean, it makes sense. But at the same time... That's what it felt like. You're on like 7th Ave outside of Madison Square Garden after like any concert and there's people with fucking seven foot tall canisters that are just blasting it out. Oh, yeah. They're everywhere.

Cops do not give a fuck. No, it's legal. So like, it can't be that much of a drug. You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't know. It definitely is. But then they also have

like the personal, have you ever seen like the personal canisters? Yeah, the one that got on Lil Thug we're doing. Oh, Lil Thug.

Have you ever seen those videos? You remember when they were posted on Instagram and they were just fucking, yeah, they just had them in their mouth. They just, yeah,

just riding in the car. They were just getting super into Whippets and then they started like selling Whippet merch. Really? Yeah. That's good. They can make anything cool. Yeah. Just riding in the car. They were just getting super into Whippets. And then they started like selling Whippet merch. Really? Yeah. That's good.

They can make anything cool. Yeah. Like that, that was, they were selling canisters. Like we went over to my boy, Mike, his,

his cousin's house. And like, he was just like sitting in bed, just like ripping them. He like had to get out of bed. And like, so bad. A ton of them just like sprinkled onto the ground.

Like shell casings. Yeah. that's really not good yeah he's just having a blast that was pre-heroin but now he's post-heroin and he's good now oh he did heroin yeah yeah nice it's a good way to kind of get you in that direction it gets you fucking cooking that way column made so many jokes about doing heroin to the point that i thought he was actually on heroin at one point. He was on heroin? No, I don't think he was, but he kept on saying that he was. These people love to do heroin.

Bro, I fucking love his speaking cadence when he does stand up. It's a complete different from his regular speaking cadence. But he talks so very slowly dude he's getting he's getting dragged because he he's losing his he's losing his irish accent oh yeah yeah people are not happy about it we're colonizing his ass yeah yeah colonizing the boys out west

he needs to get his shit together because that's all we fucking like about him is that yeah he's got that goofy accent i want two thousand dollars that's all we fucking like about him is that he's got that goofy accent. I want two thousand dollars. That's what he used to do when Saz and him won the team's game. He's like screaming at the people behind him. I should have put a thousand on this. I should have put a thousand on it. Because we put a big bet in it. I'm rich.

I'm rich. You might have to wait for a while. I can't do an Irish accent. You're going to be sitting there for a while. They're going to have to give me a lot of money. I was like, shut up, dude. They're going to rob you. Someone's just waiting

to rob you right now. He was just sitting there waiting out. You're going to take your lucky charms. Not me, pot of gold. Before he won,

he was freaking out and he just kept on being like, baby, the kids don't really need braces. They're going to be fine without them. I'm walking home.

He said he was going to walk home from Vegas. Oh my God. What a fucking bastard. He was a bastard. And then he left and then he texted me and said, should have put a thousand on that. He spelled it like that? A thousand. That's how he said it, but that's how he does say it. Tree-turty.

Tree-turty. Love that motherfucker. Yeah, like a fucking brother. Love that motherfucker Yeah like a Fucking brother Love that motherfucker to death That guy's my fucking brother Till I fucking die dude Fair to I wish he was here right now I know

I wish Big Chrissy was here I know Yeah where the hell's Big Chrissy at dude I don't know I should've hit his ass People subscribe to Suave

Oh yeah It's the super ultimate Audio visual experience With me and my best friend In the world Big Chrissy Big Chrissy Great fucking We had your I had your uh your roommate's uh sister stayed over my apartment

i know very recently shout out to shane o'connor yeah yeah we've talked about shane o'connor every episode he's stoked on it yeah his sister was stoked that you guys brought him up on the cast last really because he keeps on bringing up shane o'connor I'm like, how do you know Shane O'Connor? It's family business. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Philly's like this. Yeah.

Stay tight. Well, Austin. Yeah. I'm not really a Philly guy anymore. I'm going to Texas. Damn, dude. That sucks so much. You're telling me.

That blows. No, no, no. That sucks. I'm genuinely pissed about it Me too I'm furious You are? Why are you pissed?

Detail why you're angry That he's leaving Because all of my friends are gone Everyone's leaving I know Half the office went to Chicago It's just going to be us now Really?

Yeah Everyone's gone Nah you'll have a bunch of other Cool comedians here Yeah Me and Colm Colm will probably go back to fucking... Colm's probably going to move to LA or something.

He's going to get deported. Yeah, probably. They're going to find out the nasty things. Ireland's probably going to go to war with Israel and he's going to have to fly back. It is similar, dude. The Irish hate the Catholics and Hamas hates the Jews.

Yeah, exactly. It's fucking a very nice, very nice, even balance. What the fuck are you going to do down there? Where are you living? I'm going to get guns. I'm living in South Austin. He's going to go to the mothership with weapons. Well, I wouldn't say that in a public forum.

I wouldn't divulge my plans immediately before I even get there. I mean, he has said it many times. He's going to get two revolvers and wear them on stage at the mothership. Not just the mothership, everywhere I go. You think you need two?

Just in case one jams. You don't want to come across a situation where you're in a jam. It's not even about a jamming. It's like you empty the fucking six and then you empty your other six. But then with those revolvers, they have those easy, they have those quick loaders. True. You know what I'm talking about?

I have no idea what you're talking about. You know how a revolver has, how many bullets it's having? Six? Six, yeah. And there's like a thing that... You'll never make it in Texas. You're never getting invited. Bro, you didn't even know about the quick reload.

Did you know that from Call of Duty? Yeah. I think that's how I know it too. But it's a real thing. I've seen videos of it. Of course, of course. It's just like a little thing and you just stuff the bullets in. It is a cool...

It's probably easier to reload that than it is to reload a fucking Glock. Could be, yeah. Last thing you need is a 9mm. It's cool when you have two belts simultaneously, like one going this way and one going this way with a revolver on each one of them. Yeah, that's exactly what I'm going to do. Maybe get like a sheriff situation where they're like on my chest,

you know, and they hang down here. Yeah. I'm going to mosey into every comedy club down there just to let them know who's boss. I'm not going to use them unless I have to. Kick the door open. And if so, I have 12 ops are going to bite the dust. Yeah, true.

I would honestly go, I would go leg holster if I was you. So my daddy does whenever he goes to the city. Does he actually? Yeah, my daddy has a gun. That seems to be a very reoccurring thing for everyone in Philly. Does your dad have a gun? No, but my... Your dad uses the power of science to destroy the enemy?

Yeah, he uses his mind. He uses a laser but my uh my wife's mom's husband so i guess her stepdad well he'll have the same he'll have gun on leg type of vibe gun on leg is whenever you go to a major metropolitan city yeah for no reason in particular he takes it to church he went to church in delaware yeah and the fucking secret service was at the church because i guess the eagle's there jo to church. He went to church in Delaware and the fucking Secret Service was at the church because I guess the Eagles there.

Joe Biden was at the church in Delaware and he just like walked up the steps, saw them searching and then just like about phased back down the car.

He's like, let's go back to the car. Carol, get in the car. Why are we back in the car? Because he has the fucking blicky on the hip. Yeah, he has like a Beretta, like a girl gun yeah

beretta's not a girl weapon brother run the beretta they used to use berettas now they use no do they still use berettas they might still use berettas i don't know dude they use glocks idk i don't know what they use i don't fucking know dude just talk out of my ass so what are are you going to do all day in Austin? I guess the same show. Miss you guys. Same show, dude. Miss all my friends. Go wet a line?

I'll probably wet a line, but we'll see how that goes. On their little lake that they have there. What's it called? Lake Travis? There's Lake Travis. Yeah. And then there's the freaking watering hole. What's that watering hole called?

I don't fucking know. I don't know, but the water there is like brown. Yeah. Have you ever noticed that? There's nothing wrong with brown i've always seen i've always seen yeah what's i always see people in the at the water there it's fucking that'll be fun man hates the brown i went fishing this weekend i caught five fish you did yeah i'm happy you finally got to experience what it's like to catch one. It was awesome. It was great. Day one, skunked. Nothing.

Bad feeling. You only post your losses, honestly. I didn't see you posting any wins. No, I did post my wins. Just didn't get any action. No one gave a fuck. People just want to see you as a failed fisherman. I caught five fish in like an hour. Keepers? Crazy. No, dude. Smallest fish on five fish in like an hour. Keepers? That's awesome.

No, dude. Smallest fish on earth. Trouts? Like minnows. Trouts? Yeah. Little tiny trouts. What about the mook, man?

Nothing. Nothing. Not really much of an outdoorsman. He struggles outside. Struggles. I saw him in some like Air Max 720. Oh, yeah. The Hoka's.

He's in the Hoka's walking through the mud the whitest shoes i've ever seen and just covered in mud just completely ruined to their core he's like he didn't really complain but his complaints were shocking like we're walking on rocks and he's like dude this is he's like i'm fucking gassed he's like this is crazy and i'm like dude we're just walking on rocks like this isn't like that like he didn't know how to walk on rocks he doesn't have those stabilizer muscles in his hips no but it was like i don't know what what was and then we went to a different place and there's like a little bit we had to walk down a trail and he's like sliding down the trail and i'm like i'm like pretty much like holding his hand as he walks down it and i'm

like dude this is the level of steepness that a staircase is. I was like, I don't know. How are you struggling this much? He's a city slicker, bro. Yeah, he is. He's a city boy. Not like us. No.

But it's dope that he's just down to go on your adventures with you. Oh, yeah. He's not like, I'm going to just stay in my hotel room or go see fucking The Covenant for the fourth time in theaters. He's going to go outside with you and try and be an outdoors man i felt bad that he didn't go tight but what can you do that he didn't what that he didn't go tight the fuck does that mean don't fight lines right lines come on i'm not a fisherman dude i'm still trying to get fish on i'm tight fish on

I'm tight me and my friends are you a fisherman bro Gardini catches big old bass don't insult me like that I didn't

I don't know your acumen like that dude Gardini's a fisherman but he fishes spin rods in a pond which is kind of cheating yeah we're like oil and water

stocked pond I'm the one I gotta I really gotta get my hands dirty I gotta go in I gotta find the fish you're a river man yeah I'm a river. I really got to get my hands dirty. I got to go in. I got to find the fish. You're a river man. Yeah, I'm a river man.

You're a river monster. The river wild. Damn. Tight. Tight. I think it'd be nice if we like chartered a boat and went deep sea. Just get everybody out of their comfort zone. No, that shit's not for me.

Why? Nah, you're tripping. I don't really like doing the whole like live bait fishing. I feel like it's a little too easy. It's not. It's fishing saltwater in your yard. No, dude. You literally just take a piece of fish and you just huck it into the water.

Then you just sit there for an hour until something gets it. I'm more of a, I like to like really, oh, look at that little, look at that little, little piece of shade under a tree. Do a little. There's no way that was what your lived experience was dude i swear to god that's what it was like no for like not on the first day what was like the first day oh day one was just staring into empty water because there's not a single fish in this water and i went to orvis and they said uh they told me where to go i went to the wilson picked up some trout well i was going salmon

fishing at first and then he was like they're not going to catch any salmon he's like it's too hard yeah and then he was like go i was like what about i was like what about trout where can i catch trout it was really weird the people at those places are really like uh standoffish because they like they're kind of like gatekeepers and i was like uh well what about trout like do they have trout here because isn't like a big thing having the secret fishing spot yeah the honey yeah yeah something like you can thing having the secret fishing spot? Yeah, the honey. Yeah. Yeah. Something like. You can't keep the honey. I found the secret spot, dude. Did you? I mean, dude, every time I fly, every time I drop my fly in the water, I was just dead

drifting to every time I dropped it in fish jumping out of the water to get it. And the guy told you. He told me to go to the Wilson River. He didn't tell me where to go. I just had to poke around for the secret spot. You're a fucking bee. Wind 25 knots north-northwest. At one point, I had an audience.

A group of kids behind me. Nothing new to you. You do some bits. I had a group of children. Like toddlers. Yeah, some new material. There was a group of toddlers behind me. And they were like, what are you catching?

And I was like, just some little trouts. And they were like, are you releasing them i was like just some little trouts and they were like are you releasing them i was like fuck no i know you're fucking stomping these things out as soon as they get out of the water like that kid i'm spiking them like world of t-shirts what this this like autistic uh tiktok kid who like there's a guy he's the guy that yells yeah he posted a video of him just like spiking a fish brutally what yeah this is a while ago it's like the first time he got canceled but he's uncancellable he's indelible and then there was an apology video explaining he didn't know that was wrong yeah yeah he probably didn't to his credit i know you kind of have to give him uh the benefit of the doubt where it's like have you ever seen that video of the kid who's like

what did that deer do to you yeah that's like what this was they were like how do you get the hook out and i was like i don't know you just rip it out you rip through their cheek and change their life forever you pinch your barbs no i don't you know i don't pinch my barbs and neither do i fuck that shit i used to pinch my barbs i know you're and then i realized you're insulting me for not a week it's a lot easier to catch fish when you don't pinch your barbs. I know you're insulting me for not pinching my barb a week ago. It's a lot easier to catch fish when you don't pinch your barbs. Yeah, I know. That's why I know. Oh, do you want me to explain this to you? No, I can't. Pinching your barbs. I can deduce. You know how the hook has the barb? Yeah, yeah. You're

supposed to pinch them because it hurts the fish. And you don't want to hurt the fish. Yeah. Well, fly fishermen, we're typically catch and release guys. Totally. Of course. Not him. He's keeping every fish he catches. For a largemouth, that's a sport fish. We don't keep that. We don't eat that. That's why we got to go deep sea, all of us. And we're on the back of a boat.

The sun's beating down. We're hallucinating. A fucking big ass marlin pops into our boat. We're just doing whippets the whole time. Yeah, we're fucking fishing out. We're fucking. That's how we roll with the whippets, guys. We catch a fish. We give it a wh whip it and throw it back easiest way to catch a fish those guys have you ever seen the

videos where like a swordfish will like flop into the boat and everybody's like bailing yeah because i guess swordfish will kill the fuck out of you is Is it swordfish or is it tuna? Or is it tuna or is it marlin? Yeah, it might be marlin. The marlin. It might be the marlin, yeah. This is marlin. Those things swim like 500 miles per hour. Yeah. They're horrifying. It really is scary as fuck. But those are those big boys.

I think when you get them on the boat, everyone's got to start stomping them out. Right? You need to use your fists. That's got to be the go-to fists. Like when that guy ran on Dave Chappelle's stage. Yeah, exactly. Jon Stewart just started kicking him in the head. Everyone's just got to... You know what Jon Stewart did? You remember when the guy

ran on Chappelle's show and tried to tackle him or something? It was right after the Chris Rock thing happened. All the rappers and comedian Joe Katangs were like punching the shit out of that guy. Yeah. Really? Yeah, they beat the fuck out of him. I guess that's what you have to do. That's what you have to do if you're in a situation like that.

You have to defend your brothers. That happened at like a wrestling one time. Like someone ran into the ring and started like hitting or maybe it was at like a wrestling like 80th anniversary event and someone got attacked and then every wrestler was like, this is our chance to actually beat

the fuck out of this dude. Stop pretending for once. And they did dude. They wrecked this dude. Yeah they're scary. That's crazy. It's a bunch of mentally ill guys. Yeah. On steroids. Bad CTE and like they hate their life. They've just been fucking cutting their foreheads. Do those guys have CTE?

What? They get banged up like that? I mean Chris Benoit like killed his whole family. Because of the CTE. Damn. And they're always just getting chairs to the head. Even as light as those chairs are, jumping off of a

fucking... Yeah, I guess that's true. Yeah, I guess they don't go fully uninjured. Even Logan Paul, dude. That guy's got to have a little bit of CTE. Jake Paul, rather. No, Logan Paul from his wrestling. Even McAfee to have a little bit of CTE. You think? Or Jake Paul, rather. No, Logan Paul from his wrestling. Even McAfee might have a little bit. Yeah, 100%.

Patty Max might have a little taste. What happened? Is Dylan Danis Logan Paul this weekend? I have no idea, dude. I thought that fight was like three months ago, the way they've been promoting it. Yeah. Hey, guys. Let's take a second and talk about Game Time.

Game Time. Game Time. The exclusive ticketing partner of Barstool Sports. I love GameTime. I can't get enough of GameTime. I was just on GameTime today perusing some deals for that Eagles-Vikings Thursday night games coming up in September. And, dude, the prices are good. The prices are fantastic.

It's easy to interface. You're flying through there, getting good offers, sort them from low to high or high to low. If you're feeling a little bit saucy about yourself, no matter what, you're going to be getting a fantastic deal because it was created by fans and it was created for fans. And that's why Game Time is the official ticketing partner of Bar of School Sports and of Son of a Boy Dad.

It makes it easier than ever to score last-minute deals on tickets to sports, concerts, shows, whatever you want to do. For me, it's the birds. For me, it's going to be Phillies playoffs. But whatever your druthers are, you can enjoy that. Skip the hassle. Just download GameTime. Use the app.

You will enjoy yourself. Download the GameTime app or go to the website, enter your email, and redeem code BOYDAD for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. That sounds like a good deal. That sounds like game time. Well, there's rumors circling that Mike Perry is going to replace Dylan Danis. Really?

Who's Mike Perry? Platinum Mike Perry, the bare knuckle boxing champion, former UFC welterweight. Damn. Why would he replace him? Because Dylan Danis is pussying out. Dylan Danis, I don't think he's pussying out. They're like suing him. I think they just kind of want to cut ties with him completely, which is

really pussy. Who wants to? It seems like Dennis is backing out somehow, yeah. He's backing out. Which everyone said he was going to do from the beginning, right? Yeah. That's crazy that he just went and like destroyed their relationship and is just fading back into the shadows. Yeah, that's pretty awesome.

I kind of like him. That is a terrorist activity. Yeah. Like that's worse than what Hamas is doing. I agree. That guy blows. Yeah, he's kind of a psycho but I enjoy it on the outside. Looking in. You probably made a lot of money from Twitter.

Probably made a shit ton of money. I don't think he made a lot. He probably made. Probably made a shit ton of money. I don't think he made, he probably made like a bunch of ad deals and stuff. But I think he has to get paid unless he fights and he doesn't have pay-per-view points on the thing. So I don't know if he's making that much money. So he just did it for the love. And he's being sued.

Yeah, the love of the game. So they're actually, like Logan Paul's actually suing him? I think, yeah. Or his girl for his wife? The woman, yeah. Nina Agdal? She's suing him? Or something. I don't know girlfriend's wife? The woman, yeah. Nina Agdal? She's suing him?

I don't know for sure. Well, isn't he posting deep fakes of her nudes and shit? Yeah. Is that illegal? That's illegal? Is it? I don't know. It's a deep fake. Well, if they're suing her... He should counter sue. He probably is.

Probably just not going to work out, though. It's probably harassment at a certain point, right? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if like posting about somebody online is harassment. That's a slippery slope. Let's ask Dave. Post about them.

Let's ask Hefe. Let's ask the boss man. Boss man's in this week, bro. I know. You want to go? I got to get out of here you wanna get some face time with him

not particularly you guys would hit it off for sure I don't think we would yeah you guys have like similar hair height actually I would

I have some ideas for him yeah like what I think we should get into gambling that's awesome that's fucking genius holy fucking shit you gotta start investing in property Dave yeah I know gambling. Fucking genius. Holy fucking shit. You got to start investing in property, Dave.

Yeah, I know. That's what I'll say. Dude, I might be the best gambler of all time. I just can't stop winning. Talk to me nice. Fucking paid for my flight home last night. Did you? Gambling.

Did you? Yeah. You already had it bought. Sunday games. Oh, yeah. A little parlay. A little parlay action. No biggie. I had Gabe Davis, yeah. A little parlay. A little parlay action. No biggie.

I had Gabe Davis, Tyreek Hill parlay at any time. Yeah, and they both hit, obviously. Of course. Why don't you start blessing the internet with your picks? No, that's when it gets not fun. Because then you lose. Then people are like, dude. You're a dummy.

Yeah. You could be like seven and one. They're like, thanks for the pick, fucking retard. Dude, they always hit you up. i posted my pics once last season everyone was like dude i really needed that money and i'm like all right this is getting depressing now yeah that's your fault really that fun it's like i bet like 15 my child can't eat now yeah yeah people will be like dude i just fucking got bodied on this parlay. Can you send me some money? Have you ever gotten DMs like that?

People are like, can you send me a little bit of cash? Absolutely not. Don't put the fucking parlay down, moron. Bet straight. Bet straight, you fucking fool. You were just saying you fucking are smashing parlay. What the fuck are you talking about? Yeah, dude, because not all of us are a fucking betting genius.

You got to know your spot in betting. Dude, has this ever happened ever happened you guys do you have old scars that get like itchy yeah this is a scar from when i was in college like i punched through glass and when i pulled pulled back in i got this scar and i it gets itchy like fucking harry potter yeah and i always wonder if i do have a little in me you probably do if i got a little wizard there's got to be evil clothes david a little in me? You probably do. If I got a little wizard. There's got to be evil close. Dave is in the office. Where's Dave?

My fucking arm's glowing. Why don't we get that bastard in the fourth place? We should. Let's go, Dave. Chop it up. Talk about skank fest. I would be so scared. So would everyone in here. Yeah. Let's talk skank face. We make jokes about

Dave and then we see him and I'm like, hey, Dave, how's it going? Yeah, sure. It'll just hit you with like, so nice to see you. The shortest like eighth note. He's not singing that thing out. Fucking barely any sound is coming out. Half a syllable. Like the squeak

of a broken smoke detector. Fuck yeah. Dude, I tried to go to a fucking... Oh yeah, we got to hear about this. This is so... Yeah. My shit.

This was hilarious. You got to hear this. This is so funny. I tried to go to A concert this weekend On Friday night Actually I've been looking forward To this for months I've seen almost every

Musical act that I want to see And there's like Maybe There's barely any left That I haven't seen That I would like to go to I can't even really think Of that many

Like I've seen classic acts I've seen contemporary acts And the last one That I haven't seen Is think of that many. Like I've seen classic acts. I've seen contemporary acts. And the last one that I haven't seen is Paramore. I would fucking die and to go see Paramore. Hard times. Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na. Hard times. I like Paramore too.

Why do you even try? Dude, bro, their shit is so fire. It's for the guys. It's for the girls. It's for the whites. It's for the blacks. Yeah. Steph Curry

at his 30th birthday had like fucking Paramore and like Kendrick Lamar there or some shit like that it's so well they're so well-rounded

everyone loves Paramore so liked fucking honestly they could go to the Gaza Strip and fucking have them uniting flags well that's how it started

right wasn't there there was a festival near the Gaza Strip to bring peace Paramore playing just grabbing a bunch of those

be Frank Ocean no-showed. That's when Oswald and Hamas lost their temper. They were like, fuck this shit. Where's the bisexual black man? We were promised Frank. We don't want to see Blink-182. They said it was going to be Frank. So I fucking, we bought tickets to this show

And I'll be honest I think it was the most expensive Concert tickets Where was it? It was at Like Webster Hall So we're like

Oh dope Intimate It's not gonna be in like a stadium Like Cause they They fucking rock MSG Or some shit like that they fucking wanted rock out like anywhere and so we're super excited i literally planned my week

like didn't didn't like wasn't drinking i was like on friday night i'm unleashing on paramore i'm gonna have the fucking time of my life at paramore just so locked in on the the night of uh i was drinking those peronis that remember the peronis that when you came over to watch football i had that six down on the peronis we looked up their fucking uh their schedule and uh we figured out when their openers were were like perfect we're gonna skip the two openers we're gonna get there right like probably about 15 minutes after they start playing like skip the first like 45 minutes of the show on the way out the door after three peronies i looked down at the

peroni like i was trying to bring one as a road soda i noticed there's 0.0 alcohol i thought i was smashing a bus really there was there were zero zeros what the fuck you had the uh ah fuck what's that called when you take something and you think it's working but it's placebo yeah i was i was placeboing myself like i'm gonna have a good ass fucking time that's crazy it's kind of nice i was i was and i looked down i was like what the fuck is going on 400 calories i was loaded and like burping for no fucking reason whatever dude i'm a fucking massive paramore fan there's literally nothing that's going to kill my fucking vibe. We get there to the show.

And like, as we're rolling up, my wife sees the tickets. And she's like, this is actually for like NYU or for the New Yorker concert week or some shit like this. I'm like, I'm sure it's going to be fine. She's like, no, it says that there's like a Q&A or something like that well I'm like oh they'll probably like play songs or something or they'll probably do the Q&A and then fucking rock some songs dude we showed up at this fucking

concert 45 minutes late and they're sitting on their stage with the fucking legs crossed like this having a fucking panel conversation they were podcasting with the fucking legs crossed like this, having a fucking panel conversation. Paramore podcast. They were podcasting. It was the most expensive concert tickets

I've ever bought in my life. Do you mind divulging how many units you spent? 900. It was $900 for two tickets, dude. It was $900, but we're like, we love Paramore. It's like, it's more money that I spend on any event. It was more expensive than going to the Eagles game.

It was more expensive than fucking Phillies playoff tickets. More expensive than fucking everything. We showed up and we're like, at least they'll like probably play some songs at the end. They get to the end of this vapid ass conversation. They're like, all right, good night. And walked off stage. So since we went late to skip the openers that we thought that we there that would be playing we just skipped them playing

like the four songs that they played at the beginning so we missed the songs i was dead sober from the non-alcoholic beer it was 450 a ticket 900 in total as we just sat there in the fucking last row of the upper balcony of fucking Gramercy Hall or whatever and watch these die hard fans like woo to every fucking answer they had they're like yeah we're probably gonna like write a book and they're like

woo what's your songwriting process like where do you start and like we start with the rhythm woo it was the fucking worst dude it was so frustrating that it was like honestly pretty funny in the moment but i was infuriated dude dude and then uh i just i just have now gotten a text from my wife. She's like, I hit up Ticketmaster because it was just listed as a Paramore concert. It wasn't listed as a Q&A for the New Yorker week.

So I was like, can I get some kind of refund? They're like, since you use the concert tickets, you cannot get a refund. So it was like, if we had just not gone or fucking not scanned the QR code, he could have smashed a fucking refund. What did you guys do after that? Like, what did you just go home and go to bed? Yeah,

that's, yeah, that's pretty like, that's a pretty defeating way to end the night. It was like, I, when I was there, I just went and like smashed as many Miller lights as I could as I listened

to them talk. And then we just like went back to a neighborhood bar and fucking drank Pilsner's until, and I tried to put on that movie bottoms and i just fell asleep sitting up pretty pretty bad friday night to be honest with you pretty shitty depressing that sucks i was waiting so long and so hard you were talking about it all last week i was a rose colored boy dude i was so fucking psyched to see it that's crazy they shit down my fucking throat maybe they'll

hear this they unscrewed my head like hey come on the tour with us i like them so much too that i don't even want to put it online like complaining too much at the risk that hayley sees it and she's like oh no i've let down i lost a fan yeah because you didn't lose me but i'm still here but i was like pre-gaming all week listening to their songs like oh yeah this is a fucking hidden gem like hold on to hope if you got it bro 26 this is a fucking classic all of these fucking it was the

biggest blue balls of fucking paramour and like now they're just gonna be playing fucking theaters dude I'm gonna have no chance to get this sweet intimate access soon? probably never they'll probably never have a theaters dude i'm gonna have no chance to get this you think they're gonna do a show in new york again soon probably never yeah they'll probably never have it i'll never have the chance to fucking enjoy paramore again they're so good dude i mean you had to have it like like you had to

have had like a feeling when you were pulling up like why are we not hearing the music from outside oh it was bad but i was trying to be i was trying to be rose colored boy on the way over i was trying to be positive yeah like no no we'll probably it'll be fun like they'll probably talk a little bit then play the songs or whatever yeah we got in they're giving out tote bags at the door dude it was like that kind of vibe that's people are walking up like the only person drinking yes and it's like they're going it's like the editor of the new yorker and they're like yeah we're here for the after party like people were already going in for the after party we didn't even have the right bracelets for the after party didn't have the right bracelets to go upstairs there's no seats left to fucking listen to them like talk about like growing up wherever the fuck

they grow up it was the biggest kick in my fucking dick dude that's so bad would you have been satisfied if they did like four songs four songs would have been fun i could have gotten one note of singing from her and i would have been like that's all i needed that's really all that i needed just a little taste just the slightest taste i fucking love paramore dude you don't understand I fuck with them so hard Did anyone else seem to have the same frustration? On the way out I saw a guy talking to That's how I knew they only did four songs Because a guy was going out being like

Well four songs is better than none He was even like rationalizing it In his head Just having $450 To see a fucking conversation What the fuck is this? The Mean Girls podcast? What the fuck are we talking about dude? just having a $450 to see a fucking conversation. What the fuck is this? The mean girls podcast.

The fuck are we talking about, dude? A conversation. I could not believe it. This like cock sucking, a New Yorker reporter being like yours. Your, some songs make me dance with my upper half and this,

these make me dance with my lower half. Was that your intent? Like, get these fucking stupid ass questions out of here and let me hear one note of singing, dude. That blows. It broke my fucking heart, dude. That's a letdown. Okay, good.

It was so disheartening, but I guess I can handle it now. Yeah. But it did. That does suck. It is hilarious, though. Dude, Going to a concert, getting ready. The alcoholic free might have been a bad omen. It was sort of a... Yeah.

It was God being like, you don't need to get fucked up for this. You think you're going to have fun. Yes. This is going to be worse if you're drunk. I couldn't believe when I saw the fucking zero zeros on the back. I saw it in the fine print. I just glanced at the label and I spun it around and sure enough, like two titties due to zero,

zero fucking right. Even though Peroni made zero, zero. I didn't, they were delicious. Yeah. It tastes like the real, it tastes like the real deal.

Honestly, damn good brew. Yeah. You should, that should be your Monday night beer. Yeah. A little zero, zero Peroni action.

I know you didn't drink that much this weekend though. No, I barely drank at all. I see it in your skin. Yeah. Honestly, people were hitting me up. Only thing people hit me up more about this past week than condolences about this Paramore thing was people being like,

is Sass okay? Screen grabbing you from last week as you got back from Skank Fest because you were just like bent over with two black holes. The space time continued. I mean, I got in that night. I came straight from the airport from JFK

and recorded. You looked like hell, brother. You looked like a piece of absolute shit. I don't think I showered or anything. You looked stinky as hell. I feel good now, though. I barely drank at all. I only had one beer. You boys bless yourself with Drake's album?

No, I heard it was bad though. Who'd you hear that from? Joe Buttons? Yeah. And Mook. Mook said it was mid. People say that always. Mook said it was mid. He said this shit's mid as hell. He like

angrily took off his hat. Fuck is this? Nah, bro. Mook is happy. I listened to the first half of it. He said the J. Cole song was good, but he said J. Cole even buried Drizzy. I mean, J. Cole was him. Yeah, true. J. Cole is him. UNO.

Remember when J. Cole told Lil Pump that he was like not going to go anywhere and everyone was like, dude, fuck J. Cole. And now Lil Pump is like dead. Really? Speaking of Mook, you just sent us a video. Did you like lose a fish

from your hands? Yeah. Well I got it out of the hook and then it shriveled away from me. Wait can I see this video? I posted this on Twitter. Oh I didn't see that yeah dude it fucking shoots and then you waddle after it bro your fit is your fit is so awesome because it looks so baggy at that i don't know why it

looks so bad at that angle it looks like and then I stand up and it looks completely normal. It gets normal, but it looks like you're wearing a glad bag. I know. Well, those pants are soaking wet because I was in the water. Oh, so they're pulling from the bottom. And that sweatshirt doesn't really fit too well. Are those your fishing pants? Those are my wet wading pants and those are my wading boots.

You can tell. But that fish jumps onto the rocks. And then it knew how to get down. It knew its way out. Yeah. He's been through this situation. He's escaped before. That was probably the biggest one I caught all day, too.

That fish hit the underground railroad. Main page is going to use this for a caption contest. Yeah. He hit the underground. Yeah, that one's a good like eight or nine inches. That's me fumbling the fucking paramour tickets. That's my fun-ass Friday night plan slipping through my hands. I would kill to be back

out on this river right now. Yeah. We need to. I mean, that's the benefit of doing Boy Dad. Just Boy Dad. No,

yeah, dude, we should be on the river. We should be hitting the river except for any time you look up like things to do in New York in the fall.

It's like go to a brewery. Go to Connecticut. Yeah. It's like, bro, that's not New York. It's not dick. The only thing to do in New York is just get drunk. Yeah. There's no fall

even happening. Bro, it's 50 degrees today. It sucks shit. I love it. I fucking love it. It's so nice. It's beautiful out. It's going to start. This chill is going to kill off all the green though. Hopefully it kills off All the All the green though

Hopefully it kills off All the fucking rodents too It won't We were Cooling out on Saturday night And a fucking rat Just joined us at the table The fucking fat rat

Just fucking scurried up That's not the biggest one I've ever seen the other day Yeah they still scare me They are scary You feel like a bitch When you go But you're gonna

You're gonna have armadillos. Do they have those? Yes. That's their rats. Crocodiles. They got scorpions too. Yeah, scorpions. No crocodiles.

They're crocodiles. You're going to be getting a lot of crocodiles out there. They're going to have big spiders. That's why I have my revolvers. Yeah, true. To blast a crocodile straight in the fucking face. Your seats are bad for your bussy. Yeah, big time. My bussy has been out

This whole time Yeah Has it Yeah Fuck We'll pixelate you It's probably because Those tight ass jeans

Sorry I think they look dope Sorry not sorry I like those jeans brother Don't let sass We'll be at Zany's this week I wore it for that reason Yeah

Zany's this week Zany's Chicago All the shows are sold out though So Sorry Missed your chance Aside from Rosemont If anyone lives in

Rosemont, Illinois Where the fuck is that? It's by O'Hare And you have a show there as well? Yeah Oh you have shows all over The Chicago land area No that's also Xenius

They have two locations They have two clubs And you're bouncing back and forth? Just one show there When are you going to Chicago? Tomorrow? Yeah tomorrow God damn Yeah I know It's pretty exhausting No no Damn and you're bouncing back and forth? Just one show there. When are you going to Chicago? Tomorrow? Yeah, tomorrow.

Damn. Yeah, I know. It's pretty exhausting. No, no. But then I go to fucking... Then I'm home for a couple weeks, which I'm pretty freaking pumped about. Pumped to hang out. Yeah, let's hang out. You trying to hang? Yeah, big time. Gardini, fly back up and hang out for a weekend as soon as you move. He leaves tonight.

That's not true. Yeah. This is like when Jelly Roll put out his album the same night as us. What? Jelly Roll put out his album the same night he did our podcast. Oh, nice. Did he promote it? Yeah. It's like his last act. He's like, yeah, I'm about to put it out in like 10 hours. He's like, I wanted to end it with you boys. I'm doing Kimmel. A fun one. Matt Lauer

before us. He's so kind. He's just such a nice guy. Just Matt Lauer he had like a Dr. Evil button that was the biggest takeaway from that story he had a trap door he had a button you could press to release the hounds

he's a fucking Mr. Burns under his desk someone would come in and you just that is like a rapist of your fantasy having the button under the desk desk. Someone would come in and you just... That is like a rapist of your fantasy. Oh, yeah. Having the button under the desk. That's like fucking H.H. Holmes. Yeah. Who's that from Mad Men? No, serial killer.

Ah, fuck. He beats me. Yeah. The devil in the white city, brother. Come on. I'm not into that crap. Put me in, dude. Put me on. I don't know shit about these serial killers. He was like the first serial killer, I think. Really? Either him or like Jack the Ripper. It's a female trait to know about this kind of stuff. Yeah,

fucking true crime ass. I think there's some conspiracies that he is that he was Jack the Ripper. Oh, I see. Really? True crime ass.

He killed a bunch of people during the fair in Chicago. True crime podcast. You want to get into the world fair. Jack the Ripper, is he ripping limbs?

I think he ripped fucking souls. I don't know why they call him that. I don't know what he did know what he did he killed process he must have had like a fucking hook or some shit that he like i don't know i don't know right there was also conspiracies that he was a ghost jack the ripper some people think jack the ripper never even existed oh holy fuck dude yeah it could be true like like Lord Jesus Christ. Jack the Ripper used to like scare the shit out of me as a child. I don't know why. It was like a legitimate fear of mine.

The name, I mean, the name itself is like a scary ass name. It's villainous for sure. A ripper? Jack the Ripper? What is even a ripper? It's a middle reliever. It sounds like he farts a lot. No, Jack the Ripper, dude.

They never caught him, right? Sounds like a dude that just poots. Sounds like a guy that just fucking rips healthy ones. It sounds like a beanie. I gotta read my last Google search. Jack the Ripper. My last Google search is who is good and bad in Israel and Palestine.

That's the thing, brother. I had to make my mind up before I went public with my statement. I'm sorry for saying that on your guys broadcast No you're 100% good Jack the Ripper yeah dude there's only fucking Paintings of him Oh look at yeah this one he's a ghost What the fuck he's got a long ass coat

We can watch this video of this girl Talking about Jack the Ripper Doing makeup for 51 minutes. I'm tired of fake ghost videos online. I've seen enough of them, dude. Show me the genuine article. I need to see an alien and I need to see a ghost before I see any more videos or listen to any more shit about them. Yeah.

Catch it on fucking tape, bro. The whole world is closed circuit TV right now. There's not enough ring lights that we can't fucking capture the real ring true ring cameras or whatever they almost got it on that las vegas one with the family over that with the with the chess cam the aliens uh oh yeah remember the las vegas yeah i was like they're in our backyard yeah but there's a guy that's nine feet tall standing out in our backyard right now. You don't remember that? I do. But they didn't get him. They still didn't record it.

No, they never got him. There's cameras everywhere. Yeah. That's fucking nuts. It's a bunch of bullpucky, if you ask me. Yeah, I think it's bullpucky, dude. If I had to fucking call it myself, I think that someone is fibbing. This is a handwriting analysis

that proves that Holmes and Jack the Ripper were actually the same person. You killed people at the Chicago World's Fair. Yeah. Have you ever heard about those? There's actually conspiracies revolving around the world's, the world fairs. No.

Really? I don't know too much about it, but it has to do with like the Tartaria conspiracy theory. Have you heard about that? No, I haven't. I haven't. Come on,

lost city. Come on. He's always throwing me wild conspiracy. Sort of. Yeah. The Tartaria was. Come on, Lost City. Come on. Gardini's always throwing me wild conspiracies. Sort of, yeah. Tartaria was like, it's a really retarded one. It sort of revolves around the flat earth type people believe in Tartaria. But it's like we had advanced technology and for some reason they got rid of all the evidence of it. Because we used to build these world fairs that were like stone, huge, almost Roman things.

And then they'd tear them down like a week later and build them in like a year yeah and everyone's sort of like how did we didn't have excavators or anything how did we build these things like you're saying and i don't think it was slavery in 1900s when was when was the chicago fair i think it was like i think it was late 1800s okay maybe, maybe, but yeah, they were... Still not slavery, though. Yeah. So Tartaria. It's probably Tartaria. They say it's Tartaria and it was like this weird... If we were to bring it back, that'd be... 1893.

Re-Tartaria? Hey! Oh my god. Let's fucking go! Do you guys have dates? Dates? Yeah we gotta go Oh yeah I have

I'm gonna be in Tampa Oh yeah I'm doing that festival In Tampa The Sunshine Fest The Sunshine Comedy Fest If you use my name Sean To get tickets

I get money More money Where do they put in the name And like When you buy the Promo code type deal Sean With a W

With S-H-A-W-N That's right Fuck yeah. I'll give some other comics they could use as well. There's no comics you could use besides me.

Colin was telling me to go to that. You should. Yeah, maybe. I'm going to use... You just said you're going to be home for weeks, dude. I thought we were going

to have a fucking... That's in January. Oh, okay. Cool, cool, cool. And then listen to the super ultimate audiovisual experience as a broadcast

I do with my BFF, Big Chrissy. Big C. Patreon. I miss Big Chrissy. His gentle soul. I miss that motherfucker. He's a gentle giant. People can't go to Chicago. Chicago's sold out, but there is still tickets for the Rosemont show.

And then Raleigh. Pop Punk Tennessee this weekend. Pop Punk at University of Tennessee. Yay! Thank you, Sean. Thank you guys for having me. Come on anytime, brother. We fucking love you. Love you too.

Shaka, bro. Sayonara.