Son of a Boy Dad - Land Before Time | Son of a Boy Dad #309

Episode Date: June 12, 2025

Land Before Time | Son of a Boy Dad #309 -- #Ad: Go to https://kraken.com/barstool to learn more -- #Ad: Buy one Double ShackBurger, get another FREE with code DADMODE. Terms Apply. -- #Ad: Go to https://vuori.com/BOYDAD for 20% off your first purchase. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. -- #Ad: Get started at https://www.factormeals.com/son50off and use code son50off to get 50 percent off plus FREE shipping on your first box -- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, son of a boy, dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon music. All right, ready? Yep. All righty. Welcome back to the son of a boy, dad podcast. Today it is June 10th.

Wow. Tuesday. I can't believe it. We haven't had a single day of weather in New York that has felt as though summer is anywhere nigh. No, not at all. If I wanted to live in fucking the Pacific Northwest, I would just move to Seattle.

This is fucking miserable. Yeah, the rain is. I saw there hasn't been a weekend without rain in New York since November 16th. It's June. Wow. Wow, is that real? That's a real statistic?

I saw it based on nothing. I mean, it was like a TikTok that just said that. Shit. That just can't, I feel like that can't be right. No, it can't be right. All-winner? It's so damn good though. Why not just say that to people? Why not take that home with you?

It rained every weekend all-winner. No way, no way. This isn't London. Fucking hell. Now- When was the last time? I don't think it rained last weekend, did it? Yes. What about the weekend before that? Yes.

I don't know. You could say it, but- Torrential two weekends ago. Torrential. It has been raining for the last month, but like yet winter just doesn't make sense. I'll say this. Here's a controversial take round. I don't mind. I don't mind it right now. And here's why. I know summer is the worst time to be in New York. It is always hell, hot, humid, piss Hot, humid, piss, everywhere. Just piss everywhere. And it smells. So the longer we stave that off

by keeping the hot weather at bay, the less torture of hot summer, hot humid summer we're gonna have to deal with. Who, no, no. Disagree, disagree. But nobody's trying to go to the beach right now anyway. I think people would love to go to the beach. I think beach going folk would love to go to the beach beach going folk would love to go to the beach I like it when it's hot in the summer. I hate the beach me too. Well you get to hold your water

I mean your breath Underwater I do like to swim at the beach, but I don't like being on the beach for hours unless there are games to play There's literally like zero redeeming qualities for the beach for me. I don't like to swim. I don't like the sand. Well, you're a house cat. No, I mean, I like being outside, but I'm just more of a freshwater man.

I don't mind that. That's a good take. I'll take that. Take that tank to the bank. I don't really like swimming in general because I hate myself and my body. Right. But I like being outside.

If no one saw you. Yeah. What if you were alone? No, still hate myself and my body. You're saying that you're alone on a glassy lake. I see myself in a third person view. Also glassy is the worst. Because you can really see his reflection.

Well, but don't look straight down. Look out at the reflection of the mountain and the trees in the lake You know, I think the only time I could enjoy swimming is if it was pitch black and it was like a pool Oh, you're skinny dippers. Why not scuba dive you literally put more clothes on. Yeah, you could be a good scuba I don't want to see my shape in this in the wetsuit a baggy I could see you being a scuba diver guy with the hood on and all that.

No, I don't. I don't fuck with the ocean. No, the ocean scares the shit out of me. A lot of people are scared of the ocean. The oceans like probably above like five flying used to be my biggest fear. It's probably the ocean now. Really? Yeah.

Your biggest fear? Why, because the waves are sharks? I mean like, not more than being murdered. Yeah, that's... But like the idea of being killed, attacked by sharks, definitely bigger than being murdered. What about sharks versus drowning? Drowning I'm not worried about.

Really? Drowning's way scarier than me. Oh. I feel like I'm punching a shark. When you're built like Phelps, you don't have much to worry about. Yeah, Drowning's way scarier than me. Oh. I feel like I'm punching a shark. And you're built like Phelps, you don't have much to worry about. Yeah, but. Like Mike.

Hold on a second. If you, Bill like Mike. If you get killed by a shark, I would say chances are you're drowning, right? No. It's the double whammy. You're drowning with a massive leg wound.

Yeah, or you just die immediately. I don't think that, I don't think they're that immediately. I don't think that I don't think they're that precise. I don't think they're just ripping jugulars like McClover. Yeah, but occasionally they'll just take a bite out of your torso and you die. And then what? How long does that take? Probably pretty quick. There goes my pancreas or there goes my kidney. When people die from shark attacks do they die in the water usually, or do they die on land? Probably the water.

Really? I don't know. Depends on how shallow, right? Yeah, I guess they say that the sharks usually swim away because they realize that you're not a seal. That's what happened in Maine. I've told you that story, right? Well, that's like the story.

What? That's what happens. But there's a specific instance of this. There's thousands. No, I don't think it's thousands. No, there definitely is. The big one was in Maine. Like I'm pretty much like Amferty Shark Attack.

A great white shark killed a woman in Maine in, I don't know, maybe 2020 or 2021. Yeah, I remember. Right off of Bailey's Island, which isn't that far out. As the crow flies, it's not far from my house. That's at the windy roads back there. Yeah, you do have to go a long way out to Whiskasset and all that if you're driving.

But as the crow flies by boat, really not so bad. Yeah, more straight shot. In other words, as a shark swims, it's not that far. And I go in that water all the time. And the shark ate someone. She was a triathlete training for a triathlon in deep water, wearing a full black wetsuit with a hood. Short of putting whiskers on her face,

she couldn't have done more to look like a seal. You know what I mean? She might've even grayed out her face. Yeah, yeah. Seal face? Seal face, which, controversial, ever since the minstrel shows. The accident.

But anyway, she was swimming between the islands and a shark bit her and then realized that she was not, in fact, a seal, and then apparently spat it out and sent it back to the restaurant. Yeah. I was like, this is not what I ordered. Yeah, that's what I said. And she died. She died.

Her daughter pulled her out of the water. Yeah. And let me tell you, when she died, and this is not funny, I'm not being funny about any of this, but when she died, you guys, don't laugh now. Okay, this was a big deal in Maine, big deal. The only lethal great white shark attack in the history of the state of Maine, the only one ever.

I'm telling you, dude, I remember they were like, people were like, it was like Jaws. People were going out in boats with like rifles. I was in Martha's Vineyard when it happened. You remember this? Yes. Remember it? Yes.

Weren't you supposed to train for triathlon that day? I was. That would have been so brutal. My father sent me to the Bayside, and then somehow the shark ended up in the bay Hmm and everyone was looking forward in the ocean dude. I'm I'm due for an awesome jaws jaws is so good From start to finish it is a perfect movie. Yeah It's not for me. I really like water-bound movies. Here's to swimming with bow-legged women

What's that? Who is that? That's what like the dude says. Quint. Is that his name? Quint? Oh, oh. Quint?

Quinn. Dr. Quinn. Quint. Hard T. Is it Quint? Quint. He's the fifth of his kind. Can we just take a quick look at that, please?

The fifth of his kind. It is Quint, He's the fifth of his kind. Can we just take a quick look at that, please? The fifth of his kind. It is Quint. Wow. Yeah. Hey, Quinton? I've seen the movie. Hi, I'm Harry the Quint. I think some people do call their fifth Quint.

That's pretty good. I dig that. There's a jump scare in Jaws that really gets me. I screamed the first time I saw the dead body coming out as they're underwater. Yeah, it's really bad. That one gets me. Have you ever seen, I think it was,

I think Mythbusters did an episode about Jaws, the ending. When they shot the tank out of its mouth? Yeah, I think they found out that it would not explode. They're wrong. Well, because it explodes with like, I think it found out that it would not explode. No, that's... they're wrong. Well, because it explodes with like... I think it would explode from pressure. Bro, I've never seen the end of Jaws. That's on you.

But, uh... That's so... That's so fucked. I don't think it like... In the movie, it explodes with like flames shooting around. Uh, it's chunks of, uh... Yeah, there are flames probably, but the ch... I remember the chunks of the shark landing in the water all around.

What I love about Jaws is when they kill the shark and then they swim back. Yeah, they're kicking on the plank of wood. But wouldn't you be like, you know, there's probably another shark, realistically? No. maybe a lot more. No, they knew that was the one that had been terrorizing everybody. It was the hungriest shark. It was the bad, it was a bad fish.

But yeah, but considering there's like what six Jaws' they were wrong. That's how it should have ended. It should have ended with their paddling back and they get hit again. Did Spielberg direct Jaws 2? Did he do Jaws 2? I doubt it. Maybe.

Could we get a little fact check on that? Was Spielberg involved in Jaws 2? Because Jaws 2 was not good. Nor was Jaws 3. I think one of them was decent. You kept watching Jaws? I needed to know. I've seen one through three.

But I think one of them was pretty solid. No, you're thinking of the Godfather. Godfather 2 was excellent. No, Jaws 2 is what? Jaws 2 is the one where they're on the sailboat. No, Robert Redford is flashback in time, and he's stalking the guy through the streets of Little Italy.

No, seriously, what is it? Are they on the sailboat? It's the origin story of Don Corleone. Not involved. Not involved. That explains him. Because the shark follows Don Finucci down the entire block during the San Gennaro festival and then sneaks up and then Fannucci is like, what do you have there? But in Italian, of course. Yeah. And then the shark fucking attacks him.

He was the shark of the Sicilian shark. That was his nickname. The yeah. You've never seen Godfather 2. No. Don't care to. And you're talking about Jaws 2? Yeah. And three.

I'm trying to think of what 3 is about right now. Was that the one where there were the kids? I think that's the second one. Oh, they're out on boats and it's all kids. I think 3 is Joe Montaigne is the shark. I don't know. I saw them both, but I can't remember. They were horrible.

I don't think they were that bad. They were both pretty bad. I think if you like the first one, they're fine. Did you guys ever watch the perfect storm? Oh great I never watched it, but I know everyone dies loved it Clooney Walberg, I thought by the end everyone John C. Riley everyone doesn't die everyone does I feel like that's the premise of it that no one survives Walberg They let him float out and he floats, but the waves are 400 feet high,

so I don't think he makes it, because they're 150 miles out to sea. And then Clooney goes down with the ship, which always baffled me, because it's like, okay, well I get that happening on the Titanic, but a small fishing vessel, the captain has to go down with that? How long is his options?

Oh, I see that more than the Titanic. Get out of here. The Titanic is like that's that's corporate America. You don't want to go down with the Titanic, your own your own rig. You die with the rig. That guy, the captain with my rig every day. The captain of the Titanic had had been assigned to that job, and it was probably he was probably a celebrity as a result. Yeah. The captain of the Titanic had been assigned that job

and he was probably a celebrity as a result. The Titanic was the largest ship ever built, you know? Yeah. Okay? Huge, huge fanfare. I mean, it came out to bells and whistles. You know, the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders were dancing on the deck. The Titanic sucked.

And it wouldn't have meant anything if it didn't sink. No, it would still be around today. It would be the QE2. It would be a dinghy they would use to get to one of the fucking big boat, big cruise ships. Do you know the QE2? It would literally be the ferry from Miami to... The gift that Roman Abramovich gives to his upstart son on his 13th birthday. His side piece.

Do you know about the QE2? No. The Queen Elizabeth 2? No. Oh, that's a big ocean liner and it parked in, I'll never forget it, in the bay at Portland, near Portland Headlight and like Fort something. And we all went out in a boat to sort of tour around it.

It was a huge deal. It was where the parents met in the Lindsay Lohan version of the parent trap. That's right. That was their origin story. Did you guys get to drive on the boat? No, we tried. But when we tried to go on, we didn't

know the secret handshake. I didn't know if they brought you guys up to Vancouver or something. No. Yeah, you do the secret handshake that they do. Yeah. So I didn't know if they brought you guys up to Vancouver or something. No Yeah, you do the secret handshake that they do. Yeah, Lilo and stitch Classic that's a fucking classic. I've never seen that I've never seen twister either Can we get a little info on the qe2, please? That wasn't the boat that actually transported Queen Elizabeth, right? I think it was named after her

Yeah, I don't think it had anything to do with her. The second. Just how you name a boat after a woman. Yeah, it's the only way. But they do that with like the New York fairies. What do they name them? Like Rhonda the Drag Queen. It's just very random, low level names. It's just very random, low level names.

I've come to the realization that what I want named after me more than anything is a truck stop in New Jersey. Oh, I think that's pretty easy. I think you just sign up online. No, the names of those truck stops are pretty amazing. Do we have some QE2 info? Built in 1969. 69, built in... Built in 2008 QE2 info? Built in 1969. Built in 1969, okay well. And now it is a hotel in Dubai.

Now it's a hotel in Dubai. It sounds like a complete tourist trap scam that you were lured into. I mean it was a big deal. It was all over the Portland Press Herald. If Dubai was able to pick it up that easily. Well it was decommissioned in 2008. Does it say whether or not it was for the royal family?

Yeah, short run. 10 years. The Mexican sailboat had longer than that. Yeah, the Titanic had longer than that I think. Pfft, maiden voyage. Why the fuck are they still building the QE2 after we had been to the moon? They're like, let's conquer ocean travel.

Yeah. Go back to the moon. I think ocean travel might be the worst form of travel. Yeah, why would they go back to that? Did you ever watch The Crown? I think I saw like the last season. You started on the last season? My mom was watching it and it was the last season.

Joined? And I popped it on. I think we watched Diana go down and then I went and did something else. You popped some champagne and celebrated her downfall. Yeah, I was like that was kind of all I wanted to see. Finally, fucking die. Well, I wasn't rooting for her death.

Well, her name was Princess Die, which like no one ever put that together. No one put that together. It was written. Mm. Well, I learned a lot from that show. Mainly that Lady Di's driver was drunk. Yeah, shit faced.

And on the galaxy gas. Yeah. Yeah. That's probably what he was on. Could be. What's galaxy gas? Like nitrous. Oh, really? Just London. Fair enough. Yeah Oh, really? Just London. Fair enough, yeah.

London drugs at that time. He was probably smoking that skunk. Yeah. Isn't this skunk when you spray weed with like Raid or something like that? Why would you spray weed with Raid? So you get more fuck, cause the weed sucks over there. Keep the ants out of it. Keep the ants out out because a weed is so shitty that they need to like

soup up the highs or they're basically smoking raid I don't even understand how going off the skunk ah smoke you're smoking raid but it needs a place to land you know you can't just smoke a spray. You guys should see the lineup of Raid I have in my apartment. Oh my God. The collection. Do you know how many people sent me that video on Instagram of the person who was shaking out

the cockroach tower? Oh no. Did you ever see this video? I didn't get one of those though. I don't know what country it's in, but there are millions of cockroaches scurrying all over the floor. And someone is coming in with these,

I don't know what they are. They're these little like honeycomb, they almost look like beehives and shaking them out. And there's like another thousand that comes out. Then they grab another one and shake it out. And they were like, this is what you should do at Harry's apartment. That's what feels like is what's happening at my apartment.

I'm just, I can't stop finding dead roaches Like to I'm up to like two or two a week at this point. Oh, that's not so bad But I'm dude, I'm kid like I'm killing them Like they every time they come into my apartment. They die immediately the crunch of killing them is no no no They don't they're dying from the natural causes. No, they every time I find them They're flipped upside down and that's from the raid. Yeah, that's from the poison. Oh Your apartment is just covered in poison pretty much Yeah, I got a gallon jug and it has a hose and it and it has like this all like it has like an on-off switch

There's some sort of engine inside of it because when you turn it on it's like Walk around my apartment and just, just like pumping it. No, it's autumn. It's literally just a trigger with this massive, like it's like a power washing gun. And you're just fucking blasting every surface in your apartment with it. No, no, I'll go into like the corners and the crevices.

But it's just, again, it's not. It's safe for indoors, it's called the indoor raid. Yeah, well, you know, that's gonna be one of those things that 40 years from now, they're like, have you been impacted by the spray raid? Did you lose a child? I only do it a couple times a week. Have you suffered seven miscarriages in a row?

Usually. Call us at Morgan and Leibowitz. It lasts for a while. You may be entitled. I'll spray it sometimes after I find a roach, but I really have no idea where they could be coming from. Maybe they're committing suicide. I don't know, because on the raid, on the gallon jug, it has a photo of a roach upside down. Dude, we used to love the personal injury law advertisements in our, in our, where I grew up.

Yeah. Hardy, Wolf, and Downing was the big one. The three lawyers would come out in black and white with bats and they would be smacking the bats in their hands. They're like, we don't settle for less. It's like, dude, are they gonna beat the defendant up? Jesus Christ. We'll commit a crime and get ourselves out of it just to show how good we are.

I got hurt in New Jersey.com. Is that one? Yeah. That's the big one. That billboard is when you're like driving through the hall like out into Jersey, you see that billboard like a thousand times. What do lawyers who get into a law firm like that like tell themselves? Like is it just good pay or does that suck ass?

I think they're hoping for like uh eventually they're gonna get a call from a dude who works at like USPS and he's gonna be like I broke my arm and they're gonna be like this is the golden ticket right here we're going for the government like that's what they're hoping for they have to sit through a lot of shitty little ones yeah to catch the big fish I mean it's fishing yeah 100 it's ambulance chasing but I mean I guess there fishing. Yeah, 100%. It's ambulance chasing. But I mean, I guess there's like, the guy's Morgan and Morgan. How do you get from just being a regular guy

to having a fucking practice with your name on it? You build up a big client roster, and you win cases, and you win people money, and then when their friends get hurt, they say like, well, you're hurt too? Yeah, it's all about just stacking wins, stacking dubs. What's a good winning percentage? What's your win-loss ratio?

Yeah, what's a good streak for a person injury? What is a win in a personal injuries lawsuit? Most of them settled, right? Yeah. So then I would guess it's the dollar amount. True. It's like, were you, you know. I mean, if you're going into one of those realistically,

like what's your minimum that you're looking to get out of it? For, you know, we've handled 48 cases of pit bulls ripping the faces off of people, and our average settlement is $12,000. Cause as it turns out, people who own pit bulls really don't have much money. I'd be happy with $12,000. But if my face got ripped off, I wouldn't.

No, that barely covers your plastic surgery. Also, the lawyers are probably just trying to get enough to be like, all right, I worked for four days on this case. If I get 25%, I need to make sure I'm getting whatever $1,000 a day or something like that. So let me get $4,000 and then quadruple it to be what they get or something like that.

All right, we're looking for $16,000. Yeah. I don't fucking know. You were gonna be a lawyer? Yeah, true. Yeah, but I wouldn't have been a personal injury attorney. That's for damn sure. Constitutional law?

I don't know what I would have done. I don't think I was cut out for like, yeah, well that- Public defender. Yeah, you do public defendant for a bit, right? And then you flip sides. And then you prosecute. Or then you go to like white collar defense. Yeah, you're like-

So public defense is the lowest. That's where you just start off. No, I wouldn't even call it low. It's just that, that's like, you're in the lowest? That's where you just start off? No, I wouldn't even call it low. It's just that that's like you're in the trenches. That's tough. That and assistant district attorney. Those are the two opposite sides of like street crime. Yeah, the DA, the ADA.

The ADAs, yeah. How many orders do you got us running for the DA? One of my friends who's a lawyer was like people who he started off as a DA or as a, as a public defender, everybody will come up to him and be like, why didn't you get me off? And he would be like, you did it. You told me you did it. And they'd be furious at him because they still had to go to jail.

People think that just because they got a lawyer, they're like, oh no, let's get out of jail free. Yeah. Well, isn't a public defender also trying to get, like, just knock time off your sentence? They're kind of just like, you're going to jail. Let's see what we can do. Well, it depends.

It depends, right? If you have a public defender, first of all, every citizen or whatever has the right to a trial. And most of the time, the district attorney's office and the courts don't want the case to go to trial. So I think most lawyers will try to convince their clients like you should take this deal.

Because if you go to trial and you don't win, your sentence is gonna be way worse. Yeah. So they'll offer them a better option to try to avoid that cause trials are expensive and costs the, you know, county money and you've got fucking jurors and all that shit. Don't you think part of,

does part of you ever wish you did, you were a lawyer? Like, I feel like part of that, like, I don't know, like I feel like part of that like I don't know what if you got like a sick no man a lot of juicy gossip as a lawyer like you ran hard on the jukebox juiciest juicy gossip I don't know I don't know what was the problem I would sealed. Can't tell anybody or else they'd take your bars away. Like Young Thug's Lawyer. You ever see the videos of Young Thug's Lawyer and they play a song in the courtroom and Young Thug is like, he's like going along with the lyrics like this and the lawyer

like starts like following his hand. They're laughing. It's gotta be so fun to be a guy like that's lawyer who like obviously did it, but they're a decently good criminal enterprise and you're probably gonna get them off and they're paying you a shit ton of money Yeah, but aren't you also probably worried like if I don't get them off, they're gonna kill me. I Don't kill the lawyer Yeah, you don't think Who's ever killed the lawyer? I would kill the lawyer

Who's ever killed the lawyer? I would have killed the lawyer. If I was young thug and my lawyer didn't get me off, well, we're just going to kill you too. You can't think of any other solutions? No one kills the lawyer. I feel like a lot of people are killing the lawyer that you don't know about. You're thinking of Jurassic Park. No. Where they eat the lawyer. I think a lot.

I think. That's not a criminal enterprise. Those are dinosaurs. You get that, right? I think a lot more people are killing the lawyer than you. No. You're thinking of the big T-Rex from Jurassic Park that eats the lawyer off the toilet.

Have you ever seen Lincoln Lawyer? Yeah. McConaughey? McConaughey. That's a good one. I like that. There's a show, too. Yeah, yeah. I never saw the show. The McConaughey. That's a good one. I like the show too. Yeah. Yeah, I never saw the show. McConaughey one's baller though. It is so sick. Wish I was him. Who's a better Lincoln? I'm always chasing McConaughey in five years.

Imagine if my, have you ever seen that video of McConaughey being like, you know, like who's your goal and he's like It's me in ten years. What if my goal was also also Matthew McConaughey in ten years Who's your who's who do you look up to McConaughey in ten years in ten years really You might not be around. Yeah. Do you have any idea what that looks like? Could be dead. Are you wishing for death? I trust it.

Who's a better Lincoln? McConaughey or Daniel Day-Lewis? McConaughey. Daniel Day-Lewis was so good. Yeah, I'm going DDL on this one. But McConaughey's the best. Who has more misses in their movie catalog? McConaughey or Day- DeLue Tyron DeLue does McConaughey have any yeah classic those fires club buyers that was so sucked buyers was classic Uh, fool's gold. What's all his dating, his like Katie, Kate Hudson dating movies.

Yeah, fool's gold was not good. He had a lot of that shit. Uh, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days was good. Mostly the one with J.Lo. Oh, The Wedding Planner? Yeah. That one was good. He was piting down J.Lo.

Yeah, J. Lizzie. And then, uh. That was my, I went to that movie, that was my first date ever was at that, going to that movie. To which one, Wedding Planner? Wedding Planner, yeah. Went to the movie.

She was a little ahead of herself. Me? No, she was, taking you to Wedding Planner. Oh, I know. The first one you went out, that's a little bit. Yeah, I know, well, she was Latina as well, and they moved quickly. She was ready to start popping them out. Respect. That's a little bit. Yeah, I know. Well, she was Latina as well and they moved quickly She was ready to start popping them out. Yeah respect. That's great. What do you remember from the date?

Did you hot mouth? I remember that my date kept her coat on the entire time and it was a winter coat Yes cold-mouthed Sounds like she was freezing. She was very cold. She was blowing smoke in each other's mouths. There was a lot of distance between us. And then my parents drove us there and then her parents picked us up and drove us home. So they coordinated it. They both knew that the date was happening. Let's put it this way, it wasn't worth it. Oh, sure it was.

No. You gotta get one out of the way. Being in the car with your parents as they drive you and your little girlfriend to a date is hell. That was hell. I feel like you started dating when you were in like third grade. No, that was seventh grade.

That was seventh grade. Going out to like white tablecloth dinners. Yeah, I'll do the chicken fingers. Extra ketchup for the lady. Just little rascals. Like watch this. Can you mix the iced tea with the lemonade? No, I was terrified of women until seventh grade, sixth grade maybe. Well, that never happened for me when I was in grade school I don't think high school either or someone my parents drove me to a date doubt either

How'd you get there? I didn't date until I could drive Yeah, well did you live somewhere where you could just walk God no That was to walk everywhere well that would have been ideal I mean we just didn, Maine was so spread out. I used to walk to my friend's house and it would be like seven miles away. But I'll be there in four hours. You didn't have a bike?

I would bike too. Yeah. Skateboard. Sass grew up in Donnie Darko's neighborhood. Yeah. It is crazy. I feel like when I was a kid, I would get like 30,000 steps a day like every day

Now I'm down to 33 Because you're hovering so much you're taking that damn hoverboard everywhere. I'm always hovering these days It's a perfect kind of I got the one wheel Just lean places they used to be everywhere and now it's like exclusively homeless dudes on it They should have had your character ride one of those one wheels on uh on tires What is that was one wheel the thing that you stand on thing where it's just the two? Pedals on the side of yeah, that's madness. Yeah, I think it's insane and they go anything Oh like 95 miles per hour. Anything goes wrong, you are absolutely dead. Dead.

Like if you go over like a pebble, and it doesn't sit well. Yeah. Full face plant. It doesn't matter how much armor you're wearing, because the guys will wear elbow pads, wrist guards, and the full helmets. Your body's getting mangled.

They're wearing like iron plates. It's going gonna be like the Teflon Kevlar Hmm like the squirrel suit guy who flew into the Golden Gate Bridge Did that happen? Yeah, how out of a plane? I think that they were like a group of three of them and I think they were trying to go under and he didn't go under Oh, it feels pretty I Don't know, I've never done it.

You're going to say it seems pretty easy to go under? To avoid the Golden Gate Bridge. It's probably pretty windy around there to just use your body as a kite. True, true. Remember when we went it was super foggy. Imagine being that guy who died and you're just calling him an idiot. Oh, I'm not calling him an idiot. It's pretty easy for a guy like me to do. I went indoor skydiving one time and my fucking body

got folded in half into a full V. You think I'm going to be able to have the fucking core strength to angle my body right in a squirrel suit by the Golden Gate Bridge? KB got me indoor skydiving tickets for my birthday. Have you used it? No. I had a feeling.

Never going to do that. No, that's not going to happen. That's number two behind ocean. The sky, the ocean. I would fuck around in like an indoor skydiving machine again, like if it was just me solo in there. It was so emasculating. It was like I went with my wife when we were dating I got folded in half at my fucking at the base of my spine My whole spine was up my whole leg

They had to grab you and pull you back in. They like brought me down and they were like holding me on top and bottom Like I was a Turkish like bowl of rice that they were gonna flip over at some point. They're just like guiding my body up and down. And then afterwards, like one of the guys went in and like shot me. Oh yeah. When it's seven floors up, it was like spinning.

And I just like took pictures of them and acted like that was me on them. But I posted them online. I would be so mad. I don't know if anything would make me more mad than that. Dolan skydiving. Especially because I've seen those videos of the dudes when they like jog you. They're incredible.

And you're like. In space. They pop right back out. Yeah. And you think to yourself, how long did it take them to get that good? Because this is the least transferable skill of all time. I would say even if you've been skydiving a thousand times,

I think you step into that thing and you're like, what the fuck is this? It's all new. My arms look like olives from Popeye. They're just like up in there like this. From olive oil from Popeye. Is there anybody that likes it? I feel like I would get in and I wouldn't go up.

I would just be still on the ground. Or your body would inflate like a parachute. I just wouldn't be budging. This guy's got iron shoes on. Yeah. Twink, twink. This guy's got iron shoes on. Drink, drink. Sir, do you have any metal in your body? It's so embarrassing. It's all laced.

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indoor skydiving place How many repeat customers do they have? Because I don't know anybody who's ever gone and thought I gotta do that again. Rose the only person I know that's ever done it I've done it really yeah, we went and it was a nightmare. Yeah, it was as bad as it gets I'll never forget the feeling of the goggles cutting into my face. It was so uncomfortable that I just couldn't wait for it to be over. And you know the wind is so powerful. It's like 90 seconds too. Like I wasn't in there for long at all. What if you're good at it? Like were you good at it? No they won't let you do anything. You gotta like earn your black belt.

So you just have to sit there and just hover. Pretty much, they let you come up a little. But you know, clearly it's dangerous because they're really on top of you. Yeah, that sounds awful. It's terrible. But it's the same reason that I feel like skydiving sounds awful, like I don't wanna be attached

to some fucking guy. Skydiving. Especially because you're falling for like what ten minutes. No you fall for 60 seconds. Oh really something like that skydiving. I've done twice once By my own volition and then the other time was for that show the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and Skydiving is kind of cool, I have to say. Yeah, I don't fuck with that. I don't fuck with that. I wouldn't. I'll never do it again. I don't even do it again. The plane that you jump out of.

Yeah, at least the guy's like a flannel shirt, like drunk. Yeah. Just say, let's get this thing on the ground as fast as possible. I've got fucking booze going warm. He owns a sheep farm and Moonlights as a skydiving. He just does not care if he dies or like if anybody on board lives. Yeah, well they all got parachutes so he's probably kind of just like, who gives a fuck?

Like if we crash, if we crash and just jump. Dana said that, Dana. Just do what we came here to do. You remember Dana was too fat to do it and so he like flew up and they told him he couldn't go and then so he had to fly down but he said as soon as everybody jumped from the plane like the pilot just like dropped altitude immediately like it was like as scary as skydiving because they just had to like He's just like fuck it. Let's get this thing

around as far as possible. I'm sure yeah, he's probably done. I mean, he does it probably 10 times a day. Yeah, he does not give a fuck probably just free fall dives. Yeah, probably got that thing down to a T. Yeah, he's probably like a Japanese dive bomber. Yeah. So why would you not? Why would you do it? Why did you say it was awesome, but also that you would never do it again? Well, because I don't want to tempt fate ever again.

I shouldn't have done it twice. You know, I think if you get away with it and you survive once, you say, it's a handshake with God. What's the survival rate? And you both agree never to tempt fate again. It's like 82%. Really? 18%. What is it? 82%. Really? 18%.

What is it? 82%. No way. No. It's gotta be higher than that. It's gotta be 99.9. Yeah. If it was anything less.

But after we went to the place in Colorado, you were like, I've just got out from here before. Yeah. And then as we were leaving, we looked it up and it's the deadliest skydiving facility in the United States. Damn. The deadliest. Is that facility in the United States. Damn. The deadliest. Is that just because they have the most people jumping?

I don't know. I just saw the placard that they had in their lobby. They owned that? They were happy about that? Six years running. The deadliest skydiving facility. Death Weekly has ranked us the number one place. We have a James Beard award for death. Wanna die in the sky? Well, you've come to the Mecca. That's crazy.

I don't think skydiving is something I'll ever do. I'm not a heights guy. Like I like to ski, but I don't even like being on the chairlift. Yeah that shit stops and you're like the highest point you don't even like observatories I know that about you now I don't I've never seen you in it at the edge in New York there was an observatory or not an observatory but we took a field trip I remember to a mountain in Massachusetts where they have like a weather tower.

We got to go up on it. Not for you, you lay down flat on the ground. I did, I sat down. I was like, this is, because we were on a, we were only, we weren't even high off the ground. It was literally like being on top of like a one story building, but it was the fact because we were on a mountain,

it looked like we were way higher up. And I was like, this is not for me. You can't fall while you're sitting down. Hell no. You've already fallen. You know people are more scared that they're just gonna jump themselves, just say fuck it.

Clooney said that. It's not true. Clooney. I feel like that's just objectively false. In like a GQ article, Clooney was like, I'm just scared I'm gonna fucking jump. Yeah. It's actually, most people are just scared

of what they're capable of. of what they're capable of. Of what they're capable of bringing into. Free will is what really scares me. Clooney, his life is so perfect that like, his trauma was that he had like, free will. Yeah. There's nothing for him. For a second it was possible for him to die.

Yeah. Then I just thought about all you poor fucks having to live here without me. No more Ocean oceans movies. I could see Clooney jumping and just a team of angels being like no Come on back now George not ready for that How many will be the how many will be too many people to be in Danny Oceans crew? Like what numbers critical mass how many sequels could they go to? 15 is a team if the team is yeah hockey line. Yeah

So yeah, I think 13 is really what was it 14 Did they do for no they went to a 11 12 and 13 and then they went to eight which was all women eight Because they realized that more than that. Yeah, they wouldn't get along Even so and that was just it just logistically was impossible. Yeah. We didn't have a party bus big enough for all of them. How women get around. Yeah. I feel like 15 would be too many.

Ocean's 15. There's 15 people. Oh my God. Something very funny happened yesterday. I just remembered. What about Ocean? Oh my god. Something very funny happened yesterday. I just remembered. What about ocean? Oh my god. I feel like we're still kind of on oceans. Okay, I'll hold it. I'll hold it. I'll hold it. Yep. You're right. Like we were right. Just knocking on the door. I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm

so sorry. Uh Ocean's fourteen. No, fifteen. Oh, what about, what about this? Before you get 15. Well, what about this? Before you get into your story, what about Oceans 16? All right, Francis, you wanna hit your story? Well, we haven't even figured out 15. Let's talk about 15 for a minute. There's not even more roles. 15 is like, that's a whole basketball team

with the three guys on the injured reserve. At some point, they have to go coed, right? How do you think? Oceans offense, Oceans offense, oceans defense maybe. Yeah, yeah. Oceans 22. Just some guys are specialists. Well, we all know that Harry

would never be part of the team. Why? Because you said you wouldn't go near an ocean. And now we can go on to the final thing. I think I would be leading the team, if anything. Well, it's not Lakes 12. So it'd be settles what? Not Rivers 6.

Right. I hate the direction this has gone. Continue with your story. I provided you a lifeline and you shut it down. Swatted it away. Sabotage my topic. There's more meat on the bone. We gotta do Ocean's 15.

I'm just gonna have Owen cut the whole Ocean's 15 thing and we'll redo it next episode. I tried. I played the game. Well, we had the script. Yeah. You didn't do any of the lines that I wrote you. Ha ha ha ha ha.

You tell me. Tell you what? When you want me to tell the story. Oh yeah, I told you, you're good to go. It's a quick one. Alright. Okay, I got into an elevator in my own apartment building. And there was a guy in there with a dog, a nice dog, that was looking at me and wagging

its tail. And he had like ear pods in. The dog? No, the guy, right. And I turn to him and I go, oh, may I say hi? And he goes, hi. I swear to god. I swear to god. He was like, he looked at me like, what? That's so weird. And then I went, oh, no. And he goes, oh, okay, sure. He has to feel like an idiot. He probably thought about that for hours. Dude, I swear to God, he was like, why are you?

Basically, why are you asking permission to say hi to me? I wonder if it was in your delivery, or what if the guy was salivating over you when you walked onto the elevator, and he was dying for you to say something, and then he just choked when you finally talked to him. Dude, I- It was his dream.

I don't know, but I guess I wasn't really indicating that I wanted to talk to the dog and pet the dog. You know, usually when you do that, you're like, may I, can I say hi? And you just looked at him and you said, can I say hi? I said, well yeah, because I know that there's an etiquette of petting someone's dog. Or Scott asked permission. You got to ask permission.

You can't put your hand out there because if there's a chance, they might be like, I'm sorry, they don't like people. In which case you have to respect that because that means that dog's about to rip your face off. You're going to have to call Morgan and Bloustein. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I think that that's definitely... You could have loved that guy though. You could have gotten along great with the guy. I'm picturing the scene from American Psycho when he goes in and grabs

the guy in the bathroom and he's like, of course, but why here? Why now? Can I say hi? Sure, but why in the elevator? That guy thinks he wants to hook up with him or something. Right? Yeah, he's a gay man. And then he thinks that Patrick Bateman wants to fuck him. When was the last time you guys watched that flick?

It's been too long. American Psycho? Yeah. Oh, not in a long time. I've only ever, I think I've only seen it once. That's when it gets better every time you watch it. It's a strange movie, and I remember seeing a clip recently that,

who's the main actor in it? Christian Bale. Christian Bale, when he read the script, thought it was a comedy. And it was meant, I guess, to be like a dark comedy. Yeah. But nobody really took it that way. It's like directed by a woman,

I think it's just to make him fun of like Wall Street Bros. It's like a parody. But it did too good of a job. Yeah. That was his big break, by the way, Christian Bale. Yeah, I can see it. That was his big first movie. It's a good movie.

I love the font scene. It didn't do as much for me. You know what got, you know what, from that movie that caused a huge problem? Remember the Duke Lacrosse rape scandal? Of course, how could I forget? So one of the Duke Lacrosse players- One of the great rape scandals?

I mean, yeah, it's- It's the one. Easily top three. It's the Harvard of rape scandals, for sure. Well, no, Cosby is the Harvard. I think Duke Lacrosse is the Yale. No, you are just omitting because you are a Penn State grab. Okay, Penn State is the Harvard. Penn State is the Harvard. Cosby is the Yale.

No rape scandals at DePaul. You don't, let's look that up right now. That can't be. That can't be right. It feels like none that get reported. But anyway, there was a guy on the team who I think after the woman- I looked it up and it says the Duke Lacrosse case, DePaul College of Law.

So the only one at DePaul is the one they studied about Duke Lacrosse. Wow. That's hilarious. That is crazy. You could go demons. So go ahead. That is crazy. You could go demons.

So go ahead. Well one of the guys on the team, I think the woman, one of the strippers or whatever after she had accused them, he sent an email to the team as a joke where he quoted American Psycho and said something like, I wanna rip her skin off and wear it or something. It was a direct quote from the movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember that.

And the email got leaked or the press found out about it and nobody connected the dots that he was quoting the movie. Yeah. And it got thrown as another log on the fire that these guys were like the worst people ever. That's gotta be a nightmare for the movie quote guy,

who is like usually just doing old school and shit like that. He picks that day to have that movie quote. That was a big personality trait around that time too, just a guy who knew every word for wedding crashers I'm gonna stop doing movie references Should have gone with we're gonna need a bigger boat Knew it. It was between that and Luke I am your father

But you know, I don't know if she knows her father. So didn't pertain. And then, dude, I have a situation I need your guys advice on. My dad teaches at a school at a college. Duke? No, unfortunately not. But at a different college. And he said that he caught one of his students, he was like, do you have like five minutes to talk? I called him and he was like, I caught one of my students cheating with the meta glasses.

And he was basically like, how do the meta glasses work? Like I need inside intel. And I was like- Cheating with the meta glasses? I was like, I stand with the people. You figure this out. I don't know. No, like, I stand with the people. You figure this out. But... Snitches get glitches.

Rage against the machine. I was trying to figure out how they were doing it. How did he catch the person? They had... Because their eyes were glowing up in LED lights? I haven't seen them. They're the ones I have. I like film my bike rides in on them.

So you're talking about those Ray-Ban ones that have the camera? Oh, I thought you were talking about the Google Glass. Like the glasses. No, no. That have like a screen. No, these look really normal. These look like normal glasses. But there's a tiny thing on them, right?

Yes. I wasn't thinking about like the fucking Apple VR. That would be hilarious. Yeah. Their prescription. Yeah. I have to wear these. Why?

I can't see the test if I don't wear these. But these ones are just like the Ray-Bans. I have a doctor's note. Dear Professor. I need to be plugged in at all times. But they have the camera, but they look like they're like $300 Ray-Bans. And the camera glows a little bit on the ones I have. I don't know about the current ones and their speakers in the ear.

So I figured that this person could probably like live stream the shit to like a burner Instagram or something like that and someone could be at home watching that live stream and like typing in the answers and then like texting them Because when you get a text message it reads it into your ear Some shit like that. That would be I mean that would be pretty advanced. So how do you think they were doing it? Well, that's what I'm take a pic cuz like if you take a still with them You have to go on your phone to send the still home. Can you actually live stream with them the glasses? Yeah I think right? I think at this point you can. The ones I have can't but I think you can now. Are you sure

these are the same glasses as you? You said the meta glasses? Yeah they said they were bragging about it to another student is how we found out but he said he can't he can't like do anything about it because he didn't catch them red-handed but he knows what's happening. Wait did the other student tell him? I'm not sure who they told maybe they told it like a TA Oh wow. Or something like that and it made its way up the chain. Snitches once again but I'm trying to figure out how they could have done this the microphones are fantastic They are it sounds like you actually have speakers on and then you take her than my air pod pro

They are you take them off and you feel like somebody is like you feel like everybody could hear what you were just hearing But no one can that's probably yeah, that's probably what it was for sure Yeah, it sounds like you were on to it there You had the you had the scent of it. If so, I feel like Frank Abagnale, a former cheater gone rogue to work for the government. It's just how they do the checks. My dad lets me go home for a weekend.

You think I should have told anybody? Or do you think I should have let the kids get away with it? I don't know. Did you guys ever? You gotta help your dad. Did you guys ever bend the rules on a test? Of course. Yeah. Oh, I know you did for sure.

Francis? Yeah, for sure. Definitely. High school. To what level? Well, I remember I was in a math class and I was really not prepared. I meant to what level of your education?

Oh. College? I would never have figured out that that's what you meant. Well, that's why I rephrased it and told you. I appreciate it. Um. You ever cheat in college? Uh, no, I don't think so.

No. I was too afraid. Yeah. I was too afraid. Also, also, I, my freshman year was the only year that I had exams because I, well, I hated them. I hated fucking exams so much. And so then from that point on,

I only chose classes that had final papers, right? Or like final assignments of some kind. And you know, those final papers would suck. They'd be like 15 pages. And they'd take me a long time. Well, it's way harder to cheat. Bubbling in a Scantron. Fucking trace that bitch.

They tried to say that I got I was cheating in college. You were? I wasn't. You're cheating yourself probably by not putting your whole fucking no no college. I had like A's and B's. And then I and then I took philosophy. My second semester. And I like it was like just some read this what do you fill out the short answer test and I read what the philosopher wrote I don't know who it was maybe Plato and then I wrote like my interpretation of it and then

they were like you you just used his ideas. Oh, you didn't even paraphrase? And I was like, well, the test is on what we just read, and I just told you what we read. You used Plato? They accused you of copying off of Plato? They said I used too much, like, word for word what he said. Was it an open book test that you were able to use? It was like an assignment. It was like an assignment that you did at home.

I see. Yeah, yeah. And they were like, it came up on, like, Was it an open book test that you were able to use? It was like an assignment. It was like an assignment that you did at home. I see. Yeah, yeah. And they were like, it came up on like a plagiarism checker that I like plagiarized the entire thing. Those things suck too, the plagiarism checkers. And they made me redo it. I took science A35. Oh, sorry. Go ahead. No, no. She pulled me into her office and she was like,

to be honest, I should be reporting this to the dean. And I was like, what? Because I didn't. She like, if I cheated, I would have been like, yeah be honest, I should be reporting this to the Dean. And I was like, because I didn't like I, if I cheated, I would have been like, Yeah, of course. I was like, what? I was like, Are you at because I have obviously I've cheated on tests and shit before. This isn't cheating. But I was I know. Okay, you're talking to a cheater. But this time you got it wrong. I was like, I actually did not cheat on that test. Yeah.

You're gonna want to look for Other things. Yeah, but not this I'd redid it and I got an a they made you redo it Yeah, I do the whole thing Wow I think I had to redo like a do a new assignment and write like a whole essay Wow It was easy philosophy is easy bullshit the closest I came and This is sort of a gray area one, was that I took Science A35, the expanding universe, to fulfill my quantitative reasoning,

or no, it was my Science A core, actually. And I was not a science math guy, those were hard for me. And this was physics, really, is what it was. And it was one of those classes that historically had been an easy one. And the way that Harvard worked was that if you, like every year of the class, there was this thing called the Q-Guide

where students would review classes from the year before and rate them in terms of like how hard they were, average amount of homework, you know, individual things, rate the professor, things like that. And we all had that as we were selecting our courses for the next year. And this class, for the last two or three years, had been, people were like, that's easy.

That's how you should do, get rid of your science, ACOR, that's an easy one. But then, if that happened a couple years in a row, the class would get smart to it, and then out of nowhere, the class would be impossible. So one year it would flip. Like they'd read their own Q scores and then they'd be like, okay,

this is the year we turn it on. I teach at Harvard. You don't tell me my class is easy. Yeah. And they just turn it on. And the year I took it, sure enough, it was a nightmare. And luckily I had two buddies in it

who were brilliant at physics, but I was so in the woods. So I would just use, I would do our problem sets with them. And then for the final, you were allowed to bring in one, whatever, eight by 12 or nine by 12 note. Yeah.

Okay. What's that? Did you print? Yes. And you were nine by 12 note. Yeah. Okay. What's that? Did you print? Yes. And you were allowed to do that. Yeah. Put in like four fonts. Because it has all the equations on it.

He had told us we should specifically study past year's tests, which were available to study. And what we did is we went into the past year's tests and we took the problems from those, solved them, and then we turned it into font size like three. The smallest, tiniest font that you could still barely read. And then we packed that one page from one side to the next. I mean, it looked like the scribblings of a maniac and they literally reused the problems from previous tests. So we had it all there and we had covered our sheet.

Yeah. You know, most kids had written like formulas and by hand and, but we, ours was just like a full blown reprinting of that. So we, I guess that was probably bending the rules a little. Nothing was worse than when they would get, when you'd get one of those tests and they'd be like, uh, open notes and then you'd be like, Oh, it's gonna be a breeze. And then you have the open notes and you're like, I'm going to fail this still. I didn't take any notes. I forgot to take notes. Fuck. You're like, this is, I'm so fucked. I forgot to say it. Fuck.

You're like, this is, I'm so fucked. It's just like Joan of Arc dash, and then you start drawing some random shit. Hey, you want to get lunch sometime? Fuck, that doesn't... I remember when I was, I think I was about, or I had already like interviewed with Barstool, and I had some final for like a religion class and I remember that like this was we were fully remote at this point, so it was like cheating was a given and

Even trot like I had the full power of like the internet at home I For the life of me. I think I just didn't do it I think I just didn't submit it cuz I was like I don't know what any of this shit means like I would read the Passages or whatever and I'll bet I don't understand It is crazy chat GBT existed then it would have saved dude so much I don't know fucking what the point of any education is anymore. I really don't it's good to know things Fine, but Going to class, you know what I mean? of any education is anymore. I really don't. Well, it's good to know things.

Fine. True, true. But going to class, you know what I mean? I don't know how, people are either gonna apply themselves or they're not, and they're just gonna use chat GPT or whatever, right? And so what I mean is, if it's just gonna be a completely self-determined, I wanna learn versus I don't need to learn,

then the kids who are going to learn can do that from home, right? So what is the point of enrollment? And by the way, I believe this has already started. Because did you see that college enrollment among males versus females has now reached like 40, 60? Oh, no. I'm going to look that up. Could you look that up for me? Like male-female college enrollment split. It's the widest education gap in the history of... It's the widest education gap in the history of,

it was 58, 42 in 2021. It's because all the teaching and all the learning is like skewed towards women. Like there's nothing about like monster trucks or like Sydney Sweeney's, like huge cities or anything like that that we could like, that we know like the back of our hand, right? Which is so why you're on the 19th amendment Even a semester on monster truck. It's such bullshit like zero sound

imagine how good we would do if monster trucks was part of it and like okay like Fine, I put in social studies or some like English girls have good handwriting. So what? So fucking weird. That's why guys don't want to go to college and they all enroll in monster trucks three years of cursive Three years of learning cursive and no gravedigger jumps All right fellas, I gotta go all right brother to the airport, okay pal All right, fellas, I gotta go. All right, brother. To the airport. Okay, pal.

Unfortunately. No, that's okay. Have a good trip, good flight. Thank you. Enjoy Chicago, brother. I'm curious about that gender gap thing. Oh, okay, so it got to 56, 44, which is crazy. And now it's 56 to 39,

which means that there's 5% somewhere in there that is a different gender. Prefer not to answer, yeah. Either way, I mean 39% is crazy, you know? Yeah, it is. I mean, let's put it this way, guys. If you wanna get some pussy, go to college. Yeah.

Because it is crawling. Yeah. Or China. Or China. China's a good place. Yeah, China's a good place. What's the numbers like in China? Or is it 50-50 now?

Because they're all the girls. No, it's not. It was like 55-45 when I was there. But that was in favor of guys, I thought. Oh, because they were, because they were, the mandate was you had to have a guy. Well, and also, for a long time, when families had daughters,

they would just give them up for adoption. True. They were like, what's the point of even having this? Interesting. So if you're looking for pussy, do not go to China. Don't go to China, go to China. Go to college. Go to college. All right.

We'll see you guys next week. Thank you. Goodbye. All right. Close was over, still, still underground. I looked older till you came around I was only falling one way I was only falling one way Days were drifting For, for a sigh

So, so then you listen Now I come alive I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way Fetish drew your eye Did you realize

No one could take me alive I was only falling one way See you just a distant light Be a fast forever ride Call it just a memory Take my hand as you can see I'm Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Finish to your end Did you realize No one could take me alive