Son of a Boy Dad - Problem Solving | Son of a Boy Dad #240

Episode Date: October 8, 2024

Problem Solving | Son of a Boy Dad #240 -- Ferrone, Ellis & Settel talk shop -- #Ad: Download the Gametime app today and use code BOYDAD to easily score great deals with the new Gametime Picks! -- #Ad: Son of a Boy Dad is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit https://BetterHelp.com/SON today to get 10% off your first month. -- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #comedy #podcast #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, son of a boy, dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Yeah, I'm up on it. Be right on top of it. of a boy dad podcast today it is October 7th and we are here live from HQ three hello let's get it today this is gonna be a good one yeah I hope I can tell you know it sounded kind of negative when you said yeah I hope I don't know I just man you never really know no I can tell I can't that never can tell you're not a tone setter. It's probably true. I'm a tone setter. Yeah. Yeah, yeah I feel the energy from you today. I'm feeling really good It's your lettuce. I think I think just come from the hair is just getting better every week now people

I don't know how to the hair is it is what it is I mean you guys are nice, but let's be honest, it is the jury's still out on the hair. Well, let them let them fucking wait. Yeah. Some days it's great. And then some days it's not. Bottom line, I, I took a late flight back last night from LA, and I'm here. And I'm ready to read a red eye. No, I didn't take a red eye. But I got in at 130am to JFK. What were you in? No, I didn't take a red eye, but I got in at 1.30 a.m. to JFK. What were you in LA for?

I didn't even know you were in LA. I went to a wedding. Oh yes, yes, yes, you said that. Yeah. You did say you were in LA. It was an awesome wedding. I mean, no offense to other people's weddings I've been to, but it was probably the best wedding I've ever been to.

Damn. It was so sick. How was the crime? In LA? Yeah. Dude, I did not venture from the hotel. Oh, that's nice. I didn't leave the hotel. Yeah.

That's the safest way, it's the best way to stay away from the woke mind virus. Yeah. Well, hotel and- Well, the safest way is to isolate for 24 hours when you get back, so. Yeah. Now I'm kind of worried that I might get it.

Hotel and the place where the venue was. The venue, yeah. I was in Baltimore. I stayed at that hotel. Which one? The Admiral? Yeah, that's on the corner there on that cobblestone street. That's nice. I didn't stay there. It's not nice. It's not? No. Not at all. Did you recommend it to him? It's not nice. I didn't stay there. It's not nice. It's not now. No, I didn't. I know.

But you were there and go stay at the four seasons. No, it was terrible. It was a really bad hotel. Well, you should have done what I said. You're also haunted. Yeah. I stayed in a haunted hotel in Austin. Really? Yeah. The one that they, the Driscoll and they like turn that into a fucking thing there. They have shit all over the walls with plaques explaining like who died, where and who haunts which hallways. Oh really? Like what kind of a fucking freak gets off to actually knowing their hotels haunted?

Well, dude, I didn't even know. I, I, I, I drove there and then I couldn't figure out where to park. So I tried to look up the hotel to see if they had like a parking thing. No, they're not gonna have that. And they don't, but I typed in Admiral in and then the first recommended thing was haunted. And then I clicked on it and there was just like hundreds of articles about the ghosts.

The thing that didn't make sense to me was the, apparently the ghost that haunted it died in 1999. So they had the fucking, they had email? They're haunting via dial-up? The fuck? Way too recent, but the hotel sucked. The club was great. The board was very fun. Did you end up going to either of the restaurants that you went to?

No, no. I didn't do, I didn't leave the hotel. You gotta stop giving it, you're just wasting your advice. But it's not even a restaurant, it's a street food place that's unbelievable. You would have loved it at Cabetin. I know, I heard. It's like 20 bucks. Yeah, no, we didn't do that.

I went fishing both days. That was nice. I saw the fish you caught. Yeah. Fucking tiny. Tiny, but it was a nice little. Oh, I thought you were doing, I thought that was a picture of you doing the thumb trick

where you take the thumb and pretend to remove it. Yeah, I thought it was your dick. It was a small fish, but it was, yeah, I caught some wild brown trout in Maryland. That was fun. I clogged the toilet the day I got to the hotel. Are you trauma dumping on a trip? This is a funny story. Well, I got a lot to say about Baltimore. I had a lot to say about LA, but we got off that pretty quick. Well, I didn't know you were still going.

No, that's okay. I'm glad you used it as a springboard. We'll we'll go back. I don't have any interest. I'm gonna find a way to get us back to that. Oh yeah you're that guy? You're the guy that rings it back around? I'm gonna bring it back. No that's this guy. You're that guy. You'll see. It's gonna be a flawless transition. Well I'm on the edge of my seat waiting for your flawless transition that'll happen. All right, you clogged the toilet. So I clogged the toilet the first night, Thursday. I got in, I did the show, got back from the show, like 9.30, took a shit, big shit, like emptied the tank. Like one of those ones that's been piling up for a couple days. And then I wiped my ass and I flushed the toilet

and it didn't even look like the shit in the toilet paper attempted to go down the drain. It just immediately clogged. So maybe it was already kind of clogged. It could have already been kind of clogged. But it's also a very old hotel, so I think they might just have shitty plumbing. Yeah, that's the 1999 haunting.

Yes. There's just a ghost under there just pushing. That's how we die. Just fucking. Just holding this shit up. Dude, so then I'm like, so then I'm sitting in my room for like 30 minutes and I'm like, I really don't wanna have to go down

and ask for a plunger. Cause I tried to call the desk, none of the lines work. So I walk down and I'm like, hey, there's a dude in front of me. I wait in line and then, you know, they do that thing with like, can we help you with anything? Like as he's still there. And then I gotta be like, can I get a plunger? I clogged my toilet. And then they're like, yeah, I don't think we have a plunger. So my toilet was clogged the entire time I was there. What?

They didn't have a, they do, they like, they like pretended, like just like kicked shit around, like pretended to look for a plunger. They're like, church their pockets. For like five minutes. And then they were just like, yeah, no, we don't have one. So they just didn't, I just never got to unclog my toilet. And you stayed in that room the whole time? The entire time.

Come on. Dude. What's the catch here? There's no And you stayed in that room the whole time? The entire time. Come on. Dude. What's the catch here? There's no way that any, that's what is it? Probably a three star hotel? One star. No.

How do you not have a fucking plunger at a hotel? That's what I'm wondering, and how do they not even attempt to solve it? Dude, I don't know. Did you go out looking for one? I went to 7-Eleven to try and find a plunger and or Drano, and they didn't have one. And then I was like, what am I gonna do? I'm not gonna go to like a fucking, like a Lowe's and buy a plunger and or Drano and they didn't have one and then I was like what am I gonna do I'm not gonna go to like a fucking like a Lowe's and buy

a plunger and then why not just went to Maryland to fish and couldn't find a Lowe's on the way home I didn't want to fucking buy the hotel a plunger to plunge their toilet take cut it with you and then also I had to park the car like a mile away there's eight dollars there's you'd rather live in a shit marinating fucking hotel room than do the hotel a solid of buying an $8 plunger. The hotel didn't have a plunger. Is that not insane? But did you elevate the issue past the first time

you asked at the desk? They said the first time I asked, they said, well, we can check in the morning. Or we can see if we can get one in the morning no and then and then I went out early in the morning fishing and I was like oh I bet housekeeping like plunged my toilet and then I got back in it and then it was still clogged but it was that sneaky clog where like the shits gone you know the shit sinks down and then it's just clear water and I flusheded it. And it all came stirring back. Overflowed. No!

Overflowed. With all of your shit? No, the shit was gone. It was clean water. Wow, where did it go? It went down. The ghost took it. The ghost must have taken it.

Ghost ate it. The ghost must have ate it or something. It's like when you take a hit of weed and nothing comes out when you exhale. Yeah, exactly. They literally ghosted your shit. Dude, I had to take all of the towels and surround the toilet. I mean, dude, it was like I was at work the entire weekend.

I had to go to 7-Eleven and buy paper towels to clean the bathroom. Paper towels? Yeah. Yes, dude. I was out of regular towels. You could have asked them for more towels. They do. It was not...

No, that's correct. It wasn't a welcoming environment at all. If you go down and you say, I flushed the toilet that I thought had been unclogged by the housekeeping staff, it started to overflow, I need more towels. Dude, it was a couple of no-nonsense black broads working the desk. They did not want to hear from me. Well, I think that's obvious. I went down and I said, I need a plunger. And they were like, nah, we're not going to help you out.

They checked the pockets of their skin tight pants. Yeah, they were not looking to help. They were not looking to help at all. Dude, it honestly seemed like they didn't even know why I would need a plunger. When you go down and ask for a plunger, it's kind of like an urgent situation. They thought that you were making some silly art. Yeah.

They're like, no, I don't think we got one of those. Which they definitely do. There's no way they don't have a plunger. Is he trying to scale the outside of the building for a heist? Yeah, that's the right sound. God, I wasn't even close. He's asking for one plunger. Surely he needs two, one for each hand.

And they probably just open up the back room where the computer is and there's just stacks of plungers. Just like a pulp fiction briefcase opening up and fucking gold reflecting off of their faces because of the abundance of plumbers in there Isn't that so brutal though going down and asking for a plunger and then they why did you call? I told you I tried the lot and then no one picked up. Do you know what's even more brutal? I called three different desks, but it's also it's all to go to the same phone Yeah, it's your problem solving ability is brutal. No, you're not a problem solver. I am Okay, let me let me

Let me run through this one more time with you. I found you gave me the story and I see so many No, let me explain. Let me explain myself. Let me explain myself. I just can't believe that you chose Let me explain myself. Let me explain myself. I just can't believe that you chose you Listen you gotta listen you gotta listen, okay Let me let me give you a quick rundown of my thought process here. All right fine night one. I clog the toilet Wait stop listen Francis Night one I clog the toilet. It's late. I go downstairs. I'm okay problem-solving I go downstairs and ask for a plunger. They don't have one right. It's late. I go downstairs. I'm okay problem-solving. I go downstairs and ask for a plunger. They don't have one. Right. It's late. I already shit. I

don't have to shit again today. So I'm like alright I'm gonna go to bed. Housekeeping will come in the morning. They'll see the situation. They'll fix it. On board with you. On board. Yep. I wake up. That's still tenuous because there's shit particles flying around your room like gnats, like fruit flies. No, that wasn't until night two. I'm not sleeping as that well night one, knowing that I haven't solved that issue. I see them kicking stuff around.

I might say, all right, clearly these two women at the front desk are not the right people to help me with this. I need to find some maintenance man, woman who only speaks Spanish and has, but it was, there was no, it's a, dude, the hotel's like, it's like a, it's a ghost town. Literally. Yes. All right, fine. So you're off the hook for night one. Night one, night two or day two, I wake up at like seven. I'm out by eight. I hear people knocking on doors. So I assume housekeeping is coming. Yeah, there's a mistake.

Why? When you hear someone in the hallway knocking on doors and you know that housekeeping is around, you need to flag your issue to one of them before you leave. But my assumption was that housekeeping was gonna come to my room. They never did.

So night, so day one I wake up and I'm like, all right, I'm gonna go fishing, housekeeping Housekeeping is going to come in the house. He's going to come in. They're going to fix my clogged toilet. I think ever since COVID I've learned that housekeeping does not necessarily come every day to sort of. Tidy your room up anymore. And you got to put one of those service, please things on the outside of the door,

especially if you have a toilet, they need a shit clogged toilet sign that you can hang on there. Yes, you're a priority. This is not just I want my sheets retucked. It's I can't be here anymore due to the biohazard I've created. I created Three Mile Island with a couple logs in my toilet. All right. So I'm kind of on board with you guys for day two. You're growing sourdough cultures in my toilet. All right, so I'm kind of on board with you guys for day two. You're growing like sourdough cultures in your toilet.

You can make pritchin wine in your toilet. And you're out fishing thinking, oh, some magical Spanish fairies are gonna come in here with their beautiful plungers and figure this out. For day two, I'm on your guy's side. I should have probably tried to reach out to someone again. Well, what time did you get home from fishing? Five.

OK, it shows it's 7, 7.30. Yeah. You see that it's still clogged. I see it's still clogged. I am gassed. I go in the bathroom still clogged, and I go, Jesus Christ, and then I just lay in bed until the show.

There you go. Yes. So now. That's unforgivable. Yeah. That's unforgivable problem solving. Yes, you're right. You're right.

That is utter resignation. You're right. That is utter resignation. You're right. I resigned. You resigned. Day two, you are right, I resigned. Day three. Lying in bed is so funny. When you started this, you had so much confidence when you were like, wait, well, let me walk through this.

Let me get, cause I want to explain day three. But there shouldn't be a day three. No clean human in a hotel room in three days is letting that continue to fester. Day three, I wake up, I go fishing again. And on the way home, I'm thinking I should probably get a plunger. But then you had your own car. Yes. But the car was parked far away and there was a festival happening in the area

So I didn't want to have to park the car and then walk a fucking mile holding a plunger You could put a bag over it. Everyone's gonna know what it is I don't think it's a baguette. You go to a bread store and you get a tall baguette bag I didn't want to go buy a plunger. You don't buy one with the yellow handle. Everyone knows that it's that's what that is You buy one with a different colored handle and they think oh oh, what's that? A paint roller? Is that a spool? Well, that was me. That was the plan on night one was hoping that 7-Eleven had a plunger. 7-Eleven is not going to have a... You have to go to the 7-Eleven bathroom and rob them of their plunger. Well, I thought about asking the port if I could borrow their plunger because it's literally

right across the street. I was going to just bring it across, go punch my toilet and then bring it back. That would have been a good plan. That would have been a good plan. But then I started getting pissed. So then I was like, fuck that dude. This is, I'm leaving this shit in here. Like this is on. Then my mindset became vengeful. My mindset on day three was revenge. Yes. My mind, I did shit on top of it. My mindset on day three sitting on top of it. Yes my mind I did shit on top of it My mind's head on day three was just straight-up revenge I was going this is what you get this is what you get for not giving me a point I asked for a plunger They said they were gonna give me one in the morning. No one gave me one in the morning

But you never resurface the issue. How you get a double shit You never re-brought the issue up though Cuz I assumed they would remember Yeah, but they did. But maybe the women that were there that first night aren't there anymore. They were there. They were there all weekend and they saw, I made sure they saw me. Did you re-flag it with them?

I would look at them and I would go. Did you go back and say, guys, toilet's still clogged, any movement on the plunger? I would say stay away from 394. Well, it's crazy of the, of the cleaning lady to not do it because you're in a Mexican standoff with them at this point because you know I don't they want was a cleaning lady, but but Like so when the next people got into 394 your clogged shit was still in there It is still it will probably still be in there until someone tries to flush the toilet again because it doesn't look like it's clogged And then when you flush the toilet again because it doesn't look like it's clogged and then when you flush the

Toilet it explodes with water You're really leaving the world a better place dude I try no you don't I do I don't have a problem with you Complaining about things that don't work properly if you make a proper effort to fix them Which you did not I made a proper effort to fix them, which you did not. I made a proper effort to have the fuck to stop the bathroom from flooding. That's damage control. That was damage control like you've never,

dude, I was sweating, going around just like throwing paper towels on the ground, grabbing a towel, like mopping up the floor. It was hell. This was after the show was on Saturday night. I'm exhausted. And there's water and there's water. Why would you continue to use the fucking toilet? There was no shit in the toilet anymore. So I was like, it has to have unclogged. You didn't even think to flush it once for the check?

I did. That's what I did. Oh, you didn't use it that time? I didn't use it. And then I was like, I was like, okay, there's no shit in the toilet bowl control flush. And I was like, let me flush it. And then I flush it, dude. All of a sudden you just hear this like pop underwater, like the mass, like a massive air bubble comes up and then water is just flying out, flying. Dude, it was like you're watching it, like, you're watching it. No, gently, like, rising. No, you watch it rise, and then you go,

it's not gonna stop, is it? And then a waterfall starts just flying over everywhere. That happened on Friday night. That happened Friday night, yes. Okay, and did you tell the hotel, guys, the toilet's overflowing? No then I was, I was partly that I was embarrassed. I was a little embarrassed. Unbelieveable that you would not tell the hotel that you had a fundamental plumbing issue now

that could cause damage to the floors below because that would have galvanized them. Then they would have fixed it. They probably would have either brought you a plunger or like brought you a plumber. I didn't want a plumber, dude. I was embarrassed. I got embarrassed by that. You weren't embarrassed on the first night to go ask for a plunger, implying I was. I was very embarrassed. And then I went down and said, and they said, we don't have one. So then I was expecting, I don't know what they're going to say when I go down and say, Hey, my, by the way, my whole entire room's underwater right now. Well, at that point it is their fault and therefore you should not be embarrassed. You also take no for an answer way too

easily. It doesn't even, it's not even that. It's like your logic is so confounding. What was wrong with my logic? You admitted it to yourself. You saw that it wasn't where you resigned yourself. You were like, I'm not dealing with this anymore. I'm just picturing you laying down in the bed and just your body rises up because you just shit yourself because there's nowhere for you to poop. No.

Where would you have pooped when push came to shove? I went shit at the club. I think that from a hotel, there's like whatever, a couple things that you deserve in the same way that you know Plumbing is one of them. The basic hotel rights. It's bed, TV, shower and toilet. Yeah agreed. Toilet even over TV. Yeah.

I'll go to hotels that don't have TV's. Oh that hotel barely had a TV. I never even turned it on Just wiped your ass with a flat screen Fucking threw it on top of the shit in your toilet Spiked out through the TV remote down the toilet, and that's what clogged it I left the place I left the place very tight and clean and I get I left a tip because I felt bad What yeah, you left a tip I did for the cleaners What did they do on the next two days when they came into your room? Did they make they never never came? No, it never came once and you still tip them

What are you tipping them for? For the inevitable scenario where they go to flush the toilet and it overflows Because there are currently no signs that that toilet is clogged other than the fact that it is clogged What about all the soaking wet towels that were on the floor? I put them all in the trash can you threw them away in a metal trash can No, there's real towels and you threw out those two. No, they're not there. They're they're sitting next to the toilet in a bucket It's like it's your first day on earth What did you want me to do with them? I can't even. What was I supposed to do with them? Put them in the sink?

I give up, I'm giving up. I'm gonna do to you what you did to the fucking toilet and just resign myself to the fact that you are going to fumble and bumble your way through life without, I don't know. This happened to me once before, this exact same thing where I clogged the toilet and it overflowed.

And this was in Houston, Texas. And I called them and I said, hi, my toilet is clogged and it's flooding. And they said, all right, we'll send someone up. And then they never sent anyone up. So then I went down and I was like, you guys gotta go up there, it's not stopping. And then they let me switch rooms

and I handled the situation. So then you push for it, you advocated for yourself. I advocated for myself in this scenario. I went down I advocated for myself. They didn't want to hear it. There was I'm telling you dude. No nonsense black rods They did not want to hear it. You have to meet their fucking energy of no nonsense But like I had there was nonsense that was occurring and they didn't have any tolerance for it. So they sent me back out. Okay.

So you run into a couple N squared B squareds and you don't know what it is that you have to say to them to galvanize them. Cause there is a way to unlock that. You know what it is? I'll tell you exactly what it is. It's clapping your hands on the syllables. I need some help. I need someone to help me.

They would have fucking turned on like that if you did that. That's an option. To me, it's as simple as the water. It's the water. Emphasize the fact water is overflowing from the toilet and it's because I thought it had been unclogged but it's not and now it's leaking they're gonna be on that that's a damage to the hotel they don't want that Francis would have got Francis would have had this salted I

Gary if you this if any of this occurred you would have switched hotels no I would have switched rooms if you went down and they said and you said my toilets clogged I need a plunger and they said, and you said, my toilet's clogged, I need a plunger. And they said, no, what would you have done? That wouldn't have been the end of it. That's for sure. You would have had a little, you would have gone back and forth. No, there just would have been a, I don't know. I don't, if they, if they truly just said, we're not helping you figure it out on your

own to me, then I would have said, okay, can you point me in the direction of a place that has a plunger? I wouldn't have just guessed that the local 7-Eleven, because I know that I'm there that whole weekend. I'm annoyed that the hotel's not taking care of it, but that's life, this is what it is. Now we're here.

But you have to confront them with their own logic. You have to be like, okay, so you're telling me now that to unclog my toilet, I have to reach in with my bare hands? What happens if I want to use the restroom again? This is your hotel, your plumbing problem, how can we sort this out? Yeah, I mean, I had all of these thoughts,

I just internalized all of them. Yeah, you have to externalize them. Like I was going back up to my room, like where the fuck am I supposed to shit if I have to? Like I was pissed. I think it's a confidence thing. I was mad. I think if you, I think you need to know that you have the confidence to, you're in the right. You see an N squared, B squared, you need some exposure therapy where you just go up to them on the street and tell them what's what. Dude, I tried my best.

Wow. It was not your best. Because you said in Houston, was it N squared W squareds? It was no-nonsense white broads. White women. N squareds, W squareds, okay. So that shows that you... One squared Warner Brothers. But I got up in their face with it.

I was like, send someone to my room now. Well, you spoke that way to whites, but not blacks. Well, I have more respect for the other. For black women. For which ones? Black women. Or fear. Respect.

Fine. It's a, it's an atonement. It's your, it's sorry about the 1860s. No, to be, to be fully honest, I went down, I said, do you guys have a plunger? They said, we don't have a plunger. And then in my head, I was like, all right, if you guys don't care about the 1860s. No, to be fully honest, I went down, I said, do you guys have a plunger? They said, we don't have a plunger. And then in my head, I was like, all right, if you guys don't care about the clogged toilet, I guess I don't care about it either.

And then I went to bed. I was tired. There you go. Then it progressively got worse and it got extremely frustrating. And each time that you made any cursory effort to solve it, you realized, I'm tired. Pretty much, yeah. I went, I'm fucking gassed. I don't have time for this bullshit. I don't wanna do this it, I'm tired. Pretty much.

Yeah. I went, I'm fucking gassed. I don't have time for this bullshit. I don't want to do this. So by the end of the weekend, the bathroom just stayed closed. Yeah. I said, that's not part of my room anymore. Like washing your hands and peeing.

I would go in, brush my teeth, pee. Where? The toilet. So you're just adding. I was just adding to it. You're adding no you were in the shower I peed in the sink once might as well not hold back now right like there's not like I wanted this to be like a funny story and now

it's just like I feel like it's exposing a lot of bad qualities about me this is dragged on far longer than I was hoping. No, it's that funny of a story that we need every detail of it. It's so fucking funny. The funny part is the truth. The truth is what's funny. And so getting you to tell it in an unvarnished way. I thought the funny part was them not having a plunger and then sending me back up to my

room. No, it's listening to you be willing to drive to Maryland at 7 in the morning, but not be willing to like fucking find a plunger. You literally were just finding fish that were hidden from you the entire time. The guy at Home Depot will tell you where the plunger is. There's no mystery in that. You can almost get catch your fish right away. Fishing was pretty sick. Don't change the subject. It was it was great Just you yeah, just me. Yeah, do you listen to music?

No, just you and a stomach full of shit stomach full of shit definitely a stomach full of shit on Saturday How many fish did you catch? Not a lot I caught four the first day and then the second day was pretty pretty slow. I mean force pretty impressive I I think that was all right Why did you just shit in the in the woods? And then the second day was pretty pretty slow. I mean force pretty impressive. I Think that was all right. Why did you just shit in the woods? Cuz I didn't really have to I kind of have the ability to just turn it off if I need to Just since your asshole shut yeah, it has a good line. I think that he does He'll go up and it'll say someone clogged my toilet. Yes. Yeah, so why'd you use that line? You don't think

any no nonsense black broads appreciate a little humor? They would have been like who? And then I would have been like, I don't know. Ghost. Yeah, the ghost. The ghost of Baltimore's past. You are a work in progress, my friend. But that's what makes it so. And that's why I was saying that the hotel that I stayed at last time in LA was the best hotel I've ever stayed at. Anyways, does anyone have anything interesting to say about LA? Oh, who? That is the first time that's ever happened that he's gotten us back on my track. Well, he called a shot with the transition. All I had to do was just shame his story to a point of... Pointing out every bad quality about him as an individual, and then

flawlessly we're transitioning back. Yeah. I love that. Yeah, no, this wedding was awesome. I'm trying to think. Did anyone clog like any toilets or embarrass themselves? No, this hotel was too nice. Fecal embarrassment. That's my fetish. I love fecal embarrassment porn.

Fecal shaming. The toilets there have to be... Oh yeah, they're going down smooth. It was all Japanese toilets. You ever see those Japanese ones? You wave their hand and the seat raises. The lower seat is heated. Yeah.

So you got nice toasty cheeks to rest upon. And then you stand up and it just automatically flushes. Everything's automated. Yeah, we didn't have that. What are those? Toto? Toto or something like that? Toro maybe? Toro maybe? Toro maybe, yeah. Might be T-O-R-O.

There's on 23rd Street they have a place. You gotta grab your own shooter from there. You gotta start bringing your own toilet on the road. Yeah, bringing my own bidet. Not even just a bidet. Installing it. Yeah. A full on Japanese toilet that you install every time.

They're supposed to be pretty easy to install bidets. Yeah. Greer's always raging about them. Wait, no, didn't someone in Chicago, someone's neighbor flooded their apartment because they were installing a bidet. Oh, I could see you getting out of control. Like Tom Lay, his neighbor, flooded his apartment, installing a bidet.

Or no, Big T. Big T's neighbor was trying to install a bidet and it flooded. He woke up, put his feet down and it was water out to his ankles That's so fuck cuz so we're trying to install a bidet. I thought it was literally you like screw. I think it is It probably just bad plumbing. Oh, did I tell you guys I I swung through Vegas on the way out there. Yeah to do a quick gig and The morning it was a corporate gig and the morning keynote speaker was Alex Honnold.

Oh really? The Free Solo Climber. Yeah, the Free Solo Climber, really? So he spoke and I got to watch that. How was that? Which was pretty fucking cool. That's pretty sick. I mean, he's just sort of telling the story of his,

you know, how he got into rock climbing and then also what made him decide to want a free solo el cap Yeah, and then is like pretty severe as burgers, right? Yeah. He's fucking autistic Like deeply yeah, I think because he doesn't have train sets didn't really capture The interactions between him and his like, girlfriend. Yeah, so now that's his wife. And they have two kids. He had an amazing answer because he did his whole presentation,

which again, it's a slideshow and he's sort of talking through and he's using photos, but it's all the story of the movie pretty much. And then stuff from behind the scenes. And that movie came out out I think in 2016. Yeah, so It seems to me that he now makes it at least a portion of his income just from doing corporate gigs and Telling a story that I would guess he's been telling for six years. Yeah years. Yeah That's amazing. You probably get like six figures from some of these. Exactly. Like if they like a stand-up comic, they love a mountain climber. Absolutely. Because the analogies

write themselves. Well, exactly. So his whole metaphor was risk and risk analysis. Yeah. Which they were trying to layer over business practices and things. And he, I would say he didn't do that good of a job. He was pretty literal. Drawing the parallels, you know, as someone with his condition is wanted to be. Exactly. Cause after they did a Q and A and all the questions were about assessing risk and all this stuff. Yeah.

And someone said, someone asked a question, which was how does your wife or girlfriend or whatever feel about the choices you make to free solo and put your life on the line? He goes, he goes, well, you know, the girl I was dating in the movie is now my wife. And back then I really just didn't care what you thought you could tell from the movie. He goes, but now that we have kids, uh, I value her opinion a little more. And he meant it totally literally. Like it wasn't a joke at all. He was like, now we're a team. I have to kind of run things by her. Yeah. But he fully said, you know, I was just did not care. Still do it. Uh, I don't know. Just less frequently. Maybe I don't know if he's free. So have I told you that I went skydiving with him or just coincidentally once now, I don't know if he's free soloing. Have I told you that I went skydiving with him?

Or just coincidentally once? No. I don't believe you have told us that. You went skydiving with a guy from Free Solo. Already let's talk about Game Time. Game Time. We got a new feature at Game Time, Game Time Picks. And man, is it special.

Game Time has always been my personal partner for Phillies games. Every time around this year Phillies playoffs I say hey I gotta freaking get there and then I go to Game Time go to Game Time picks and I see how incredible the pricing is. It's saying that you can get into a game three ticket right here in New York for $351. What? That's an insane deal for playoff baseball. It's not bad. No, it's insane. Dude, listen to this. You can go see Jelly Roll tonight at UBS Arena for 14 bucks.

Where's UBS? Is that out in? Oh, is it in Long Island? I think so. Travis Scott at MetLife for only 97 bones. Bangle's Giants on Sunday for only 63 bones. Last time J-Roll was in town, he came on the pod. Yeah, I wonder if he's gonna do the rounds again. He came on the squad. He did your guys show, that's right. Yeah, the day before his album came out.

Right. It was the last show he did before his album came out. Right. It was the last show he did before his album came out. That's so sick. And then it was pretty sick. So you should be back around, right? You should be back around. But you know where I'll be around this weekend?

Is the Game Time website. The Game Time website. Justin Timberlake at the Barclays. Oh, no. The Barc. Looks like the world tour is back on. Man, I'm tired of seeing. Wow. Remember that?

This is going to hurt the tour. This is going to hurt the tour. What tour? The world tour? Oh man, Game Time Picks, you know what it has. They filter out the fluff to show you only incredible deals on great seats so you don't have to waste time searching through thousands of tickets. What are you waiting for?

I might go get my tickets to the bark lays right now now I'm gonna go get my tickets to the Barclays immediately download game time app and use code boy dad to easily score great deals with the new game time picks what time is it game time we shall wear maybe like suits and sneakers to the Justin Timberlake concert yeah that's cool yeah suits and like turtle necks and sports jackets. Yeah. Dig in a box. And we all get drunk and try to drive home. Well. Never mind. All right.

You lost me. All right, guys. Let's take a second to talk about BetterHelp. I love BetterHelp. Halloween lets us have a. Francis has been hammering BetterHelp lately. I've been hammering it. I think he's the first person to ever have

a 24-hour therapist on BetterHelp. He's doing a live stream. I think he's the first person to ever have like a 24-hour therapist on BetterHelp. He's doing a live stream. I have diamond medallion status on BetterHelp. I got my own personal hotline. They just pick up and they're like, hey, Francis. They just have a ring camera installed in his house and they watch him 24-7. It's like the portal to Ireland.

Just go to Central Park and just talk to a better help. Employee rotating at a desk at all times. And shout out to them because that's how it can be for you. Halloween, let's just have fun with what scares us. But what about the fears that don't involve zombies and ghosts? Therapy is a great tool for bringing your fears right to the forefront of finding ways to overcome them because sometimes the scariest thing is not facing our fears. Obviously I've benefited from it. Obviously Francis has benefited from it. Imagine your

life without it. Be a lot more candy, that's for sure. Yeah, exactly. It's very simple, very straightforward. You fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist. You can switch anytime, no additional charge. Overcome your fears with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash sun today to get 10% off your first month. That's better. H-E-L-P dot com slash sun. The first time I ever went skydiving was outside of Denver and he was on the plane. But this was before free solo. This would have been probably 20,

2011, 2012, something like that. Do you think he feels anything from skydiving? But this was before free solo. This would have been probably 20 2011 2012 something feels anything from skydiving. Well, that's why I said to him I said cuz like checking his phone while falling It was his 19th jump. Yeah, and he was getting his own license so that he could go by himself Yeah, and I said, what are you? Why are you doing this or something? And he was like, I don't know It's the next thing, something like that. What the fuck? So then that very same skydiving facility is the exact same place that we did the skydiving for

the Most Dangerous Game Show. Yeah, no way. I remember you said you went there before. I didn't realize it was with the biggest daredevil that's alive. Yeah, you shake his hand and it's like shaking hands with a guy who has five sausages for fingers.

I mean, have you ever seen the video of the rock climbers against the bodybuilders doing a, it's like probably like a lat pull or something, like a row. And the rock climbers ability to fucking move this is like blows these bodybuilders away and he out reps them, does more weight than them. And he has, he's built like, you know what I mean? He's built like Owen, handsome, beautiful body. It's truly bizarre how muscular their fingers are. And he talked about getting in shape to free solo L cap and

how he did a lot of finger strengthening exercises. No wonder his wife saves with that. I know. So he's just doing pull ups with one finger in these holes. Yeah. Like in his van, that's what he did. But I don't know. He was cool.

No wonder his wife lets him continue to train. I think he still does do it because in the alpinist, he's in the alpinist, right? Is he interviewed in that? Yeah, he's in it because what's his name? The dude from that solo, LCAP, I think faster than he did, so then he goes back and does it again. Those guys are the kind of guys who, if they don't die, do it, like they, they will basically do it until it kills them.

That's what happened to the dude from the Alpinist. No matter, even if you have kids or a wife that you can... The best one of all of all of Free Solo is the best, but another really good one is Maru. Maru is so good. And it's Nate's cousin. Really? His first cousin is the third guy, the guy who falls in, I think in a skiing accident. And has to rehab and they wait for him and bring him up.

That documentary is phenomenal. It's crazy. I didn't know you saw that. Conrad Anker. So Conrad Anker and Alex were climbing partners for a while. People really seem to respect him. Yeah. He's got to just be skydiving with a resting heart rate of 45.

Yeah, nothing. He doesn't feel anything from that. So if you have a parachute, he's like poking holes in a parachute before they jump This conference I did the the speaker the morning speaker was Alex Honnold the the midday speaker was Some a woman who's a CNN? Fox News analyst who came in to talk about the state of the US economy and then me. And I'm like, wow, what a... That's a good murder as well.

How did the show go? Mélange of... A beautiful Mélange. It was the best corporate gig I've ever done for sure in that they actually set up the stage and had the like seats around and it had a comedy club kind of vibe. And it was 220 people packed in, and people were up for it. It was good. I started by just reading their mission statement

and making fun of it. And they liked that. And then I did my act, and they didn't love that as much. Yeah, did you have to do a lot of like, I did some changes. Off the top shit. I did, I remember there was a moment where I have a joke about like,

kind of making fun of fat people. And I changed, at the last, just in my head, I saw it coming. Yeah. And I was like, I'm gonna change that a little bit. Yeah. Wow, cause they were really fat guys. I just, you know, I don't want to fucking bum people out at 3 p.m.

It was a three. No one's drinking. Then then that night they were going to see Maroon 5. I mean, it was like a pretty jam packed schedule. Yeah, it was cool. But the company was awesome and everyone was super cool. And it was a fun gig. I had to do. I, it was cool. But the company was awesome and everyone was super cool and it was a fun gig. I had to do a... I did a... Last thing, last thing.

So then I had to go to LA that night. Yeah. And I got off stage at 4.30 p.m. The hotel that I was performing at was five minute drive to the Las Vegas airport. Yeah, Harry Reid. I had an 8 p.m. flight to LA, but I was trying to get there sooner

so that I could get there to do, to be part of like the welcome festivities for the wedding. And I booked myself an earlier flight. I booked at 4.30 p.m. I'm at the hotel. Yeah. I booked a 5.20 p.m. Delta flight. I booked at four thirty p.m. I'm at the hotel. Yeah. I booked a five twenty p.m. Delta flight. I call an Uber. So I'm still at my hotel. The flights in 50 minutes. Yeah. I go I get there at like four forty five. I go up to the ticket counter. I can't even check in on my app because it's too close.

And they're like, do you have the credit card that you booked your flight with? And I was like, oh shoot. I had accidentally booked the ticket with a card that I'd canceled because I'd lost it. And they were like, we can't let you go. We can't check you in unless you have the card. And I'm like, well, how did it even go through if I canceled this card? And they were like, whatever. So I said, can I go through security and try at the gate? And they were like, we don't advise it, but okay. Cause security, all you need is the ID. Yeah.

So I raced through security. I get on the tram, I go to the thing. Now it's fully like I'm sprinting through the airport and I get to the gate and there's no one there. They've already boarded everybody on the flight. And the woman said, oh yeah, they called us to tell us that you were coming. And I was like, those fucking snitches.

Cause they were like telling me not to go. There's no way I'm gonna make it. I'm like, look, I had a flight, I had a seat reserved, even though the card didn't work. I don't know how this happened. But I know I had a place on this plane. What can we do? And they were like, I don't know what to tell you.

And then some other woman goes, why don't you buy a ticket for the later flight and then fly standby on this one? Because the original ticket I'd had for the 8 p.m. was on Southwest, which I did not. I'm on now? Jesus Christ, bro. It's not ridiculous.

So I buy, standing there at the gate, I buy a ticket for the later flight, and then I fly standby and got there. Hell yeah. It was like the most heroic I don't know travel make. That feels amazing when you've got a good make like that. Yeah I've had it like I'm fucking make it and then you slide through. Well I got in like three and a half hours earlier. We're getting an early yeah I've had that where I've gotten to the airport and then I like out of the corner of my eye,

I saw a flight boarding to where I was going. And then I just went up to the desk and I was like, can I get on this flight? Can I come too? And they were like, it's going to be $70 extra. And I was like, how about 700? Take everything? Get me on this fucking plane.

It changes everything. It just has a euphoric feeling. But LA has the same problem Chicago does, which is that they've now hacked it with Uber such that if you want to take an Uber from the actual terminal at LAX, you have to take a black car, which was $140. Dude, it is so brutal. You know, JFK does that now too. Yeah, I've heard that.

Or you can get on what I would only describe as like a refugee van. Yes. To bring you to a tent city where you have to trade a totem with a gypsy for the right to stand in line for an actual Uber. And it's not the dude, the wait for the shuttle is not short either. No. I've waited for like 40 minutes for the shuttle.

It stops at every terminal along the way. Yeah. It is brutal. You know who that economy is amazing for? It's for the guy who stands there with just like a polo shirt on and goes up to everybody is like, taxi, taxi. Yeah. Yeah. Because at this point I'm ready to get in the taxi. Those guys. I don't fuck with those dudes. Excuse me. If they're going to fucking, I just spit.

That's why I said, excuse me. I feel embarrassed. It's all good. No, both of us were interrupting you and you deserve to continue telling your story. No, I literally just, I'm only saying, excuse me, because I spit. But it's like, I would get human trafficked for the chance to not have to take the bus. Absolutely. Even if they have to do that. Those guys are just, they're not as bad as people give them a reputation.

Yeah, it's just the idea that, but it's like... Because you're in an unmarked vehicle. You need to set the terms though. You just say, this is where I'm going. We're not no-nonsense white women. We can handle ourselves. This is what I'm willing to pay and either you're taking me for that or you're not. No tip included.

Like that includes the tip. And they'll either say yes or no. And you can cross reference by checking the price of an Uber first. Well, I had that happen to me at JFK when I first moved here, but I didn't know what was going on. So I paid the dude like $300. I thought he was gonna kill, but I didn't know what was going on. So I paid the dude like $300.

I thought he was going to kill me if I didn't. And they'll also like forget how to speak English halfway through. They'll be like, you didn't pay the market. I didn't know what was happening. And then like halfway through the trip, I'm like, I realized that I was just in like a random, random car flying down the highway. I was so scared. I remember texting my parents being like, I don't know what to do That's gonna tuck and roll that happened to me in Chicago where I got in one of them and the guy had a taxi meter And it was going by it was going up. Maybe every point five. Yeah. It's

Infuriating and I was like is this by a fucking gas pump? Yeah Second it's infuriating and I was like is this by a fucking gas pump. Yeah I was like is this by time or by distance and he was like it's by both. I was like no Can't be time and distance I was so shocked he's got his own equation He definitely had an algorithm that he made like special for me velocity equals distance over time, right? Yeah, he was hitting me with... We were going to a hotel, an airport hotel. It was one of the ones that's right there around the corner. It was like $80.

It was like, please get me out of this death trap. That shouldn't even be legal. I think Joe DiMaggio's father was a cab driver in San Francisco and he found a faulty meter where it would juggle up every time you hit a pothole and he learned how to... He memorized where all the potholes in the city were and that's how he... Paid for his son's baseball career? Yeah, but it's also like how many times did he have to fix the suspension of the car? That would probably be costly, the suspension, the shocks.

That's a great book, by the way, the biography of Joe DiMaggio. I can't remember what it's called, but... How explicit does it get about his trysts with Marilyn Monroe? Marilyn Monroe, yeah, they talked about that. Is that where they said that she was a stinky sandwich eater and fucking like... Yeah, they called her smelly. Bring tuna to bed with her. Yeah. What? They said she would have just sandwich eater and fucking like... Yeah, they called her smelly....bring tuna to bed with her?

Yeah. What? They said she would have just like tuna sandwiches in her bed. No. And she had... and she smelled bad. Yeah. Seriously. No, this is true.

I'm not letting you judge anyone after your fucking... hotel clogging, marinade camping session. He names his towers. Is that where they talk about our nation pointing at our lonely eyes to him? Yeah. Come on. I love that song. That deserves more. He names his talents. Is that where they talk about our nation pointing at our lonely eyes to him? Come on. I love that song.

That deserves more. That's great. That was a banger. It's an amazing song. I've never really understood why there's the Joe DiMaggio reference. You know, he got pissed about that. I heard that. Yeah, from me.

Because I told it on the podcast before. It's possible I'd heard it prior to you telling me that. I think you heard it prior. I don't think so. I remember you saying it and thinking, oh yeah. It wasn't new information because that tickles a different part of your brain when you get new information and then when you get something that's... Right.

I didn't say, oh wow. I said, oh yeah. Like the fact that Indian people own 50% of motels. Have you been telling people about that? Someone reached out to me about that and said, he's a Patel and has more information. And I said, share. And he never got back to me. Exactly. Because he's not a Patel.

He is a Patel. That's his name on Instagram. It's a fake account. That was me. That was my burner. Fuck you. I just... Fuck you. That would be hilarious if I was just DMing you from a burner. From your Indian guy burner.

I'm sure it runs deeper than we can even imagine. Really? Yeah. That's intriguing. What the fuck? Howard Johnson was a Patel? Who's Howard Johnson? The...

That's the hotel chain? The hotelier. Yeah. Wait, wasn't it... What kind of hotels do the Patels have? Motels. Oh, it's all motels? Yes.

Patels have hotels or motels? Motel is the game company. Motel. Motel, can you play Motel at a Patel Motel? Hmm. Interesting. Not to be confused with SAS's favorite human. Don't tell. Dave Attell. with SAS's favorite human. Don't tell.

Dave Attell. Oh, Dave Attell. Have you seen Dave Attell's Don't Tell while playing Motel at a Patel Motel? He stayed at a Patel Motel. Very fun. Filming his Don't Tell called Dave Attell Presents. Dave Attell. Dave Attell Presents.

Namesh Patel. God damn, that's good. That's good. Riffey Longstocking. Clip it. That's good ass shit. That's gonna take us to the next fucking level. Dude, when we were in Baltimore, that area of the club is like pretty nice. It's so nice.

Yeah, it's a nice area. What's that called again? Fells Point. Fells Point, yeah, it's stunning. And the last night, me and Mook went to 7-Eleven to pick up some drinks. You guys didn't go to And some plungers.

Tim's Street Oyster House. No, we must have missed it. The food truck. We went to some sports bar that was very nice. Jimmy's Seafood? No, I don't believe we stopped by Jimmy's. But we went to a, we went to 7-Eleven and I was wearing my Patriots sweatshirt, my gray one,

and we walked in and there was a dude to the right and he goes, man, fuck the Patriots. And I kind of like turned around and I was like, yeah. And then I turned around and his eyes are rolled into the back of his head and his pants are like at his knees. He's a character from The Wire. And I was just like, all right, that wasn't a joke, was it? And then he got in a fight with the 7-Eleven employee. I was with Moog once in, we were in Denver.

We went to 7-Eleven. I think he, that's where he shops. 7-Eleven. No, he didn't want- That is his grocery store. He wasn't going to go. 7-Eleven. No, he didn't want- That is his grocery store. He wasn't gonna go to 7-Eleven. I was the one that was like, you mind if we stop at 7-Eleven? Okay.

Yeah, that was my suggestion. Mook sustains himself via what he finds at 7-Eleven. I've been there in my life before, sustaining myself fully at 7-Eleven. Oh yeah. Yeah. Going to every shopping trip at 7-eleven Some lady came to the show an older an older couple came and I guess they're fans of you and they pretty much ruined my weekend

Because they brought me candy. They brought me a lot of candy and then I ate ex just Insane amounts of candy. I can't use weekend. They said that they said they brought you some sweet treats. She was like, Francis isn't the only one that gets that gets that gets desserts. And then she handed me a bag of all of my favorite candies. I must have eaten 10,000 calories of candy this weekend. This is nice. It was awesome clock in the toilet, dude. It was awesome. But I'm currently trying to get off the gummies and that did not help at all. Dude, I bought on the way out awesome, but I'm currently trying to get off the gummies and that did not help at all. Dude, I bought on the way out to Vegas before I left, I bought a family share size bag of sour Skittles and I don't know why I did this. I put a napkin down on the tray table and

then dumped them all out and sorted them into different colors, like their own color groupings. And I ate them in order from worst to best. Yeah. And I finished them. And I remember going halfway through the yellows and being like, why am I doing this? Because you got to get to the blues. That's why.

Well, by the time I got to the purples and the reds, I was, I was, I'd come so far and I had earned it to finish the good ones. I'd worked to get to that point. What did your seatmate say? Bro, it was weird that I did this. And not only that, but my mouth for two days felt scarred. It's like, it's like if someone took a knife

to the inside of your mouth and just diced it up. It felt like there was just like sloughing off the skin. Like the inside of my cheeks was burned. And that's from a chemical reaction. How crazy is that, that you literally have a science experiment going on in your mouth? It was so bad. And I don't know why.

I've got to get a handle on my stress eating and my binging. Yeah, I'm done. I'm done with gummies. I have a real problem. It's nerves. It's like somehow putting things in my mouth calms my anxiety. Dude, that in the exact same way. And I don't even realize I'm doing it.

Yeah. But I was getting to a point. Then what I started doing was I would take one of each color and put them in my mouth and push them around with my tongue and decide, see if I could tell which flavor was which. And then I'd suck all the sour off and then get it until the hard shell had been melted away. And then it became this like one mass.

And then I would suck on that like a hard candy until it disappeared And I thought if I went at that pace that I wouldn't finish the skittles But it was a long flight. You know, I had plenty of time Yeah, and something about having them all there in front of you out of the bag I wasn't gonna put them back in the bag now. You just had them on your table, raw? Yeah, well, on a napkin. One of them fell off onto the floor and I accidentally stepped on it.

And this is how fucking crazy I am. I thought about peeling it off the floor and eating it. Yeah. This is where I'm at right now. That's unbelievable. I have major problems. Dude, this lady brought me structural issues's amazing. Structural issues. This lady brought me Life Saver gummies, gummy bears, Sour Patch Kids-

Oh my God. Sugar cookies, and a gallon sized bag of Airheads. No, that's borderline fetishist behavior. The Airheads were a problem. She's a feeder. That's Munchausen by proxy. She's definitely a feeder for sure. You know who I'm talking about? No. Someone in Baltimore said that she said she brought you, or maybe, I don't know, maybe

she said she saw you at the port and she was like, Francis isn't the only one that gets gifts. I don't remember anyone bringing me candy. Maybe she was referring to the podcast, because you've talked about how people bring you pie. They do bring me pie. Yeah. Someone in Austin made me pies. Yeah.

And I was like, oh, do you bake a lot, this guy? And he's like, this is the first time. I was like, hey. That's weird. But he was a good guy. Of course he's a good guy. He learned how to cook. Little individual ones. He was like, I tried them. I promise. It's not that bad.

Were they good? Did you try them? I did was it good? We ate them. They were solid. Yeah, they were good. Well look It's his first time make a pie the first time I made a cake It tastes like soap baking is very precise You need to use the exact measurements of things like baking soda and you know Whatever flour and all that and you have to mix the hell out of it If you don't have an industrial mixer, yeah that shit with your hand is not going to work. You cannot kind of fudge baking. You're not supposed to fudge baking.

You just can't. No, you can't fudge baking. You have to be very precise. You can try baking fudge, but you can't try fudging baking. You can't fudge baking. Fudging baking. Oh, man. No, but he was such a nice guy. Of course. Fudging baking. Oh man. No, but he was such a nice guy.

And they were good and we all ate them. Me and John Kennedy and a couple other people. Gardini. Solid crew. John Kennedy was with you in Austin? He was there for that weekend so he hopped on and did a little guest spot. Nice. I think Gardini might come to Rochester. Oh excellent.

Yeah. We'll see. That would be great. I'd loveini might come to Rochester. Oh excellent. Yeah we'll see. That would be great. I'd love to have him up there with us. Us. Am I out now? I gotta bring someone to Rochester. Are you seriously booting me from the Rochester show? Yeah. Yeah. I'm getting bumped. Sean? What is this? Dude I was looking at photos of that club this morning. I had a stressful, it was a stressful morning. I had a package that was supposed to be coming tomorrow and now it's not.

I wake up to my manager texting me about Rochester and then I'm looking at the photos of Rochester and it's like, dude, what is it? A fucking 10,000 person room? I mean, it's the biggest space I've ever seen You want to hear stressful morning factory? I had Peppers got arrested a rug delivered. Yeah, Jibril got arrested for what like everything you could imagine cocaine and strangulation cocaine weapons

strangulation assault Cocaine weapons strangulation assault So now we don't have a good what we do is do we have Gonzales he's truth safety corner I I had I don't know why I did this but I I had some rugs delivered from Morocco They finally came which by the way, you have to pay an import tax when they arrive at the border So I had to log in to DHL and pay the border agents. And there's the fucking shipping, the shipping strike was going on while you're, while you had Moroccan rugs in tow. That's true.

Well, they came and I have like a small living room in a. And I put the rug in, I lifted up all the furniture, cleared it out, flipped the sofa up and put the rug down and then put everything back in place. And then I realized that that rug was not going to go there and I had to switch it. Yeah. So I undid everything, pulled the rug out, put the other rug down there. And then I went into the bedroom and I had to put it under my bed and I have a king size bed and I couldn't, it has all these, you know, pegs under the middle and I'm doing this alone. Yeah. And I tried to lift up the bed and feed the rug under and that wasn't working because it kept bunching. So I got under the bed and I'm bench pressing the bed and pulling the rug under

me and then lifting my butt to scoot it under me and the bed's heavy. And I'm having a really hard time keeping it up while simultaneously feeding the rug under both my body and the bed. Yeah. It's having to work out. There was just this moment where I was like, I guess this is why I should probably be in a relationship. So you could have a woman to do it with? I need a feeder. I'll lift. I can do the lifting, but it would be nice to have the company of a feeder. You know what's crazy is women can do most of that on their own. They know.

They know a way. Isn't it like, I'll just come home and my whole house will be rearranged and my wife like put a rug underneath a bed or like moved an entire couch around or something like that. Just like, yeah, like I just did it. It was hard. I just did it. You know, it goes to show that you hear those stories of how women have this incredible strength to lift a car off a baby that is trapped under the car,

which by the way, how did the baby get under the fucking car? But if you have that strength in you, then- Use it for nesting. Apply it for other things. Yeah. Yeah, get to cross-fitting. One time I went skiing when I was younger, and there was a lady and her baby was falling off the chairlift and it was like a child, like a small child and she couldn't lift the

baby back up onto the chairlift so they had to like call 911 and I was young and I was like she must not fuck with that kid at all. How do you not have like the adrenaline and the strength to pull your 40 pound child? It's probably not her kid, it can't be her kid biologically. Yeah. There's no way. Like don't you think you would kick into like an extra gear and be like.

Yeah. And she's just like, I can't. Yeah. Did you think about going to one of the poles that supports the chair lift and unstrapping the padding to then bring under the kid and catch it. I think they had to bring out the net. They usually use one of those pads that's attached to the pole. Oh really? So that if you hit the pole full speed you bounce off and they get five or

six people to stand under it like they're catching a child falling from a burning building. That's what they did for this kit. They did? Yeah. You know why they do that? So that they don't die when they hit the ground? No. Well, that's reason 1A. No, excuse me, 1B. Reason 1A is that it's very hard to catch a child wearing skis. That makes sense. Because they can impale you.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. And I think that it's very smart to have realized that we shouldn't just try to bear hand a child basically wearing... Weapons. Knives. Weapons, yeah.

On its feet. You could easily just like take your skiing poles and kick the kid's skis off though. Well then you'd think that if the mother were dexterous enough to remove the child's skis, she would probably be able to bring it back onto the skis. It would be funny if she like lifted the kid up and popped the skis off and then put it back down. I can't pick them up. So there must have been someone who learned the hard way that you can't catch a kid with

skis. Correct. Yeah. The kid probably was fine. And someone just got their head chopped off. Yeah. Probably not chopped off, but definitely a good gash. Or just pierced through the neck.

Yeah. Chairlifts are scary as hell. I've always fucking hated chairlifts. Do you ski a lot? No. But I used to. I was on the ski team. Really?

Oh, yeah. Racing. Doesn't sound like something that's true. It was. I was on it for three years. You did a quadruple black diamond. But I really only did it for one year real and then the next couple years I kind of would just would go with the team and then just ski by myself. Hmm. That's nice that they'd let you do that. Yeah. They don't

really give a shit. Well they probably saw your performance on the Javelin team and we're like well this guy threw it 80 yards. Yeah exactly. He automatically has a shot. He's the best athlete we've ever seen. someone sent us your javelin results. Yeah. Yeah, not bad No, I don't think it was as bad as we had thought. I mean, I was only like two meets It was like 23 meters or something like that. Yeah, not bad. That's not bad I couldn't throw a javelin that far probably maybe you probably could I Was 13 at the time so I would assume you could probably throw it further than me yeah I got a bum shoulder though true you do have a bum shoulder shoulder pops out like nobody's

business Josh Allen's definitely got a bum shoulder I'm just seeing you see that concussion that he got oh you didn't see it no he went out cold Allen did yeah I was like there's a lot of controversy they think that the bills are gonna get in trouble for letting him play the rest of the game. It was like last like five minutes of the game, I think it was definitely in the fourth quarter and he got hit hard. And then in the slow, like it didn't really look that bad, but he was, he was down for like a while and they brought him to the blue tent and then they put him back in. And then after the game, people saw like this footage of it slowed down

And it was like he totally went out like lost conscious, but the concussion doctors a third party Yeah, but I think they Yeah, I don't know Yeah, I guess if you get knocked out. It's a concussion no matter what I mean dude. He went out Completely that fucking sucks. Yeah, that's terrifying. He's also fucking smart as shit Josh Allen when we did a dozen with him in Wherever the Super Bowl was he carried our team. Oh really he knew everything watching him do like long Multiplication or long division whatever the fuck it was he flew through it so fast. It was so impressive I have just such a newfound respect for him. And

I mean, you got to be probably be pretty smart to be a quarterback. Yeah, in the NFL. Quick decision making. Did you see that video of that lady with Jackson? I did. Yeah. That was fucking creepy. Hey, just some older lady just like walked up to Lamar Jackson. Well, he was like at dinner. And you know how old ladies will just like touch you? Yeah, she like had his arms around her. She had her arms around him and she was like, whoo, day.

It was very uncomfortable. Just like trying to root for her team. Yeah. And how did he take it? He kept on going, this shit going to be your fault. This is going to be your fault. Oh, that's cool. He was cool about it.

Well, kind of. I mean, I don't think he was going to like hit her. No, but he was playing back. He was being playful. Yeah, he didn't look like he was cool about it. Well kind of I mean, I don't think he was gonna like hit her No, but he was playing back. He was being playful. Yeah, he didn't look like he was thrilled about it He just kept them saying it this is get like it's gonna be your fault when you lose I'm gonna use that's better than him being like get away from me. Yeah He was already I think he was on live or something. Oh really he was being filmed There was a reason he was being filmed. It wasn't I across the restaurant. I think they were at like a team dinner. Yeah. Yeah.

That's so fucking weird. Just an invasive ass lady. Yeah. I talked to a couple people this weekend after the show about the Ravens and there's like people from Baltimore who are like Bears fans and shit. I was like, that must suck to be from Baltimore, live in Baltimore and not be a Ravens fan right now. I mean, you could just be a Ravens fan.

You could just ride with them. True. You know what actually worked together were the green and the yellow Skittles? The reds and the purples were fine, but I knew that would work. Yeah, it's like a berry smoothie. And then the yellows and the oranges were OK.

They need to throw in a flavor as a palate cleanser. I would say the reds do that. No. They should have like reds too similar to purple. They should have small cubes of steak in there. Yeah. To like kind of like just get a savory to go with the sweet. Or like maybe like a like yeah. Beef jerky.

A little piece of beef jerky. Something like a biltong. Maybe some biltong, just some crispy biltong in the middle of your skittles. Because I've noticed that when I was eating When I was eating like 15 airheads at once in one sitting the flavors start to blend together Right starts to taste like the blue That's what like when you have the wasabi pea in the Czechs mix exact or in the pub mix exactly that shit is

Great cleanser a gorp gorp raisin a gorp raisin is so nice. A great cleanser. A gorp. Gorp raisin. A gorp raisin is so nice. I haven't had a good gorp in a while. When you watch that, uh, the, uh, 7-Eleven worker get in a fight with the white guy with his pants by his ankles. He was not a white guy. Oh, he wasn't? No.

Who won? Who won the fight? Dude, those 7-Eleven guys really, they really hold their own. They always hold their own. They really hold their, they always hold they really hold there They're not scared of anything the only thing more dangerous than a 7-eleven guy is a guy that works at a gas station in, Texas That's Asian, but it has a Texas accent. Oh, yeah, if he has a Texas accent, you know, he has the biggest gun you've Huge fucking Chinese guy with a fucking brilliant Texas accent.

Y'all get along now, you hear? It was two Indian dudes working behind the counter and then like 10 black dudes just like ripping into them being like, one of the guys was asking for a free drink. And he was like, remember last time I was here, he was like, you owe me a free drink. Let me get a free drink. And the Indian dudes were just like,1 but they were they were not letting it fly of course and then they were they were like laughing like the the dudes behind the counter thought it was hilarious they were not scared at all

and they'll be those guys were not joking yeah and then they stormed out because they probably one have the oop with them yeah right behind the counter yeah and two they could probably beat your ass with a mop like a Shaolin mop. Yeah I saw a video this morning of a bunch of dudes in You know that's why I asked about the crime in LA because there was a video this morning of a bunch of dudes breaking into A 7-eleven in LA and then the guy at 7-eleven fights them off with a mop. Does he? Yes, swear to God But those dudes are so badass It's like 30 dudes like kicking through the door, and then this guy just standing there

door closed They do repost that was like what's to stop some like Some 7-eleven worker from pulling out a Uzi and mowing down all these low life Yeah, we'll get fired up about the looting. Yeah. Should we wrap this up? I gotta piss real bad. Sure.

You've been going for an hour? Yeah. Definitely. Really? Oh yeah. I felt like we were just getting started. I'm having fun, but I think Airballs are right. If Harry wants to stop it.

If you wanna keep going, I can piss and come back. I think it's safe to say that when you go to the bathroom, that's the time. No, it's actually when I go to the bathroom and then I come back and I got a whole new life in me. No, the fans will remember who ended this one. Yeah. All right, well, we'll be back on Thursday. I'm going to be in Rochester this weekend. Please come, I beg.

And just a reminder, I am no longer part of that show but is everything good with you yep all well thank you all right we'll see you guys on Thursday all right Francis Francis will maybe be there we don't know buy tickets regardless doesn't matter if he's there or not all right we'll see you guys on Thursday. Goodbye.