Son of a Boy Dad - Son of a Boy Dad: Ep. 10 - The Art of Podcasting with BIG CAT

Episode Date: July 27, 2021

-- Sas & Rone are joined by friend of the program Barstool Big Cat. We discuss fatherhood, playing pickup with Vaynerchuk, fist fights, responding to the right DMs, & much more. -- Make sure to check out our new merch as well!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, son of a boy dad listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. All right, shall we? Do it. Just do it. Let's do it. So I'll make sure we're talking.

It's the mic. Thank you. This is your first rodeo. What? I don't have headphones. I don't have time for this guy. I don't have time for this guy. I can't hear you. I don't have headphones. I don't have time for this guy. I can't hear you. I don't have headphones. Thank you.

Thank you. Make sure it lays across Sass's lap. Alright, ready? Do you need me to clap? We could use a clap. One, two, three, four. I like to always be the last clap. Alright.

What's up, everybody? day what is up everybody welcome back to son of a boy dad podcast today is a very very very special episode i am sitting here in we're in between studios right now so we're changing things up um i have my co-host ron hello and then we have Barstool Big Cat with us today. I thought you guys were supposed to have Tim Dillon on. Well, we... Kelly canceled him for us. Oh, okay. Kelly told us that we couldn't have...

The backup Tim Dillon. Yes, exactly. So we're going to need you to be on the same type of vibe that Tim Dillon's on. Yeah. Okay. No vaccine. Or is he no vaccines? Or just vaccines?

No, he's pro-vaccine. He's pro-vaccine. I'll suck all your cocks in here yes yes that's exactly what we're looking for big cat would you like to be an executive producer of this show i would love to i love you guys i love uh roan more than sass but that's okay we're working on it of course um but yeah that would be great i think that this show is great thank you i retweet it every time i see it i don't listen but i retweet it now you don't need to listen i actually actually do listen.

It's not very listenable. It's more of a visual. Most people turn on the YouTube and just watch it and they mute it. Watch it with no sound. They like to see Roan's dick. Were you aware of what happened? Yeah. You saw? Yeah. Roan had a little incident where his penis was out on the show. That's okay. Yeah, it happens. It was the bare bottoms that I was wearing. They just framed

my penis perfectly, but we'll get to that later on. We'll touch on bare bottoms in a bit. How's it going i'm great it's great to be in this studio that's very cramped it is cramped and it is warm too i'm progressively getting warmer let's riff i don't know yeah this isn't an interview yeah you're kind of you're doing a little interviewee but maybe we could start off by um who's tom happening? What? Is this not Diet Coke for everyone? Yes, it is now. It's for the table. We did also, we brought this rose for you. I thought this was for everyone.

You brought this for everyone. It's Diet Coke for the table. If this is your Diet Coke, I won't drink it. No, you can drink the Diet Coke. I don't care. Nope, that's fine. That's alright. The cards in that wallet are for everybody too. And that Costanza ass. It's a fat ass wallet. That is a fat ass wallet you're gonna wind up with any cards scoliosis from fucking sitting on that one i think i already

have scoliosis you know what i actually think i have is the uh is the not scoliosis but the twisted spine it's i think you well you have internet shoulders yeah big time where you become like uh i think we all probably are afflicted by this i definitely have internet shoulders someone sent me a picture while i was in the office of myself and i was like oh my lord like my neck is legitimately at like a it's like a terrible like an impossible angle it's like a terrible meme of saying you know like oh you're you're just in your mom's basement yeah literally like that's what it looks like like my neck is my chin presses against my chest you're like a c-clamp you are just it's completely like that it's crazy and that's just how i sit like i sit

like that at home too they make like the sesame street you know the letter of the day it's just kind of a g honestly the way the knees kind of kick up you have a little g vibe to you but big cat why we really had you on is we want to learn how to be successful podcasters you've been a successful podcaster for as long as you've been podcasting. You jumped in the podcast game and got successful right away. Sass, this is his first foray into the podcast game, and he's had early success. I jumped into the podcast game a couple times.

Didn't have much success. Yeah, I disagree. But it wasn't the kind of success that Sass gonna that sass is looking for. Call her daddy success. Exactly. You want the Spotify movie. We're looking for that 60 mil. Smartless. Well, I would say right off the bat. Teach us everything. I think that you guys are

good because sass is he's got the cute boy thing going down. I think you gotta lean into it more though. Yeah. So shaking a little ass. Yeah. You're just, you know know you're a cute boy he's a giggle dicker he needs to turn into a wiggle dicker yeah there it is that's the giggle dicking right there just giggle dicking

we love to laugh on this podcast you should be doing giggle dick tiktoks and getting everyone redirected to son of a boy dad we're pretty good with our pushing the show I feel like so you don't want his advice, you're saying? No, I do.

I'm not going to give it now. No, I think the only thing that we struggle with the most is like I only promote it like on Monday and Tuesday. Yeah. And so how can you fix that, do you think? Because we only do one episode a week. So I feel like if I'm on Thursday, I'm not going to be tweeting like, oh, go listen to the new episode. No, but you could tweet out clips. It's the constant conversation.

So you're posting clips even on a day where the podcast isn't out maybe not when a day when the podcast isn't out but that's also because we do the podcast three times a week so but the conversation never stops yeah yeah so it's like something comes up you talk about it you interact with people what about sex tapes though sex tapes are good about releasing one of those uh between the two of you we don't know yet okay we're trying to figure it out we were thinking about working a third in if we had to this oh this is a very tight this is a studio built for two small women yeah we were actually gonna touch on the chairs a bit before i'm not i'm not a fan of the chairs yeah no they're not good they're not good chairs we'll talk to someone about that um i do think though that you should

yeah you should play up your boyish good looks more yeah definitely you're heartthrobbing people i think you're a little more jacked is it okay to say that shirtless pictures sass is a reluctant heartthrob yeah but that's also kind of that plays into his heartthrobbedness the fact that he's like coy about it he's a coy boy uh-huh exactly little zach efron high school musical era it's like what these dance moves yeah uncircumcised penis oh this look that i just gave to the camera yeah throw one look i mean it's so fucking cute every time you do it i'm like god damn it you're like a pet frog yeah this little frog look like if i stroke your back little tiny little hedgehog with your hair spiking out just want to fucking pet you and and you know

put you under my pillow yeah definitely definitely so to segue into the next topic um bezos was in space today do we think dave portnoy will ever go to space no you don't think he'll start i don't think so i don't think you're really doing anything with will ever go to space? No. I don't think so. I don't think you're really doing anything when you go to space. It's more of a flex thing. You get there and it's not like a 15 minute round trip. Space is very boring

I feel like. I feel like the only thing that happens there is you just get really scared. The idea of space is a lot better. You're just like wow this is terrifying. there is you just get really scared. The idea of space is a lot better. Yes, you do. You get scared. This is terrifying. I want to go back to Earth. If I fell out of this spaceship, I'd probably die. A brutal death.

But not by falling to Earth, by just going the other way. Right. You just fall out of it and just drift. But they say that everything's in space, though. There's other universes, and there's a parallel. There's another little Sasquatch. You think so? A funnier,. There's another little Sasquatch. You think so? As cute? A funnier, cuter version of little Sasquatch.

If there's infinite universes, there's definitely cuter and better versions of you. That's true. Space, overrated. Not a space guy. He said he was going to get Penn to 140 before he goes to space and I appreciated that. Really? Did he say that? Yeah.

That's awesome. How's your portfolio these days? Did he say that? Yeah. It's awesome. So you fucking love that guy. How's your portfolio these days? My portfolio? Portfolio. Sorry, I'm parched because I can't drink any Diet Coke. You did put it super far away from me. You put it so far away from me. You are depriving

me of Diet Coke now. You gauged his arm length. I just went and I bought this Diet Coke. I just bought this Diet Coke right before we recorded. What are you even doing drinking Diet Coke? You know Diet Coke is going to make you just as much of a fat ass as a regular size Coke. Does it really? Is that true?

I don't think that's true. Yes it is because the artificial sweeteners latch on to your fat cells. Yeah but it's zero calories. Diet Coke makes you hungry. Yes and it makes you hungry. I'm on that gains mode yeah well you better get those gains i bought the diet coke because i was tired because i didn't

sleep at all last night and then i wanted something that had caffeine in it but i didn't want an energy drink because i didn't want to get anxious before the podcast but you are anxious no as it's shown by your legs just absolutely driving a hole through this fucking table yeah he's had a fucking 140 beats a minute that's probably not quite my tempo s's had a fucking 140 beats a minute tempo. Not quite my tempo, Sass. That's why we do a above the waist shot these days. We've seen too much penis and too much restless. There was literally an episode

where Roan's entire dick was just out. Yeah, I saw it. I jerked off to it. It went viral. That was our sex tape. Some girl posted it. We talked about this like 10 times, but it's funnier. 11th time is always the funniest time for you to keep on sex tape. Some girl posted it. We talked about this like 10 times, but it's funnier. 11th time is always the funniest time for you to keep on pushing it. This girl posted a TikTok and it was like, I watch Son of the

Boy. Oh my God, I love Son of the Boy. I watch it because it's so funny and then the camera pans over and it's just Roan's dick. Did you say Son of the Boy Dad? Son of the Boy Dad. 10,000 likes. Wow. Yeah. Is that a lot? Yeah. Okay. Wow. All the comments were just like, let me I want to unleash that thing inside of me. Damn. It didn't say that. Swing comments were just like, let me, I want to unleash that thing inside of me.

Damn. They didn't say that. Swing it around for us. I want to take that thing home. I want to put it in my purse. No, they didn't say that. I want to carry it around all day. They say, why is it shaped like a figure eight? Why is it lumpy? Why is it lumped out like a soft pretzel?

I want to use that as lip gloss all around my mouth. There was some lip gloss talk, a little bit too much lip gloss talk. But one of our problems that we're running into, Big Cat, as we have you in here as our consultant, our consigliere. Which I would love. I'm happy that you guys invited me on. I thought it was going to come a little bit earlier,

but that's okay. We weren't really doing guests. Yeah, that's true. Not guests, but I don't want to be considered a guest. By the time I have this kind of show. Yeah, a friend of the show. We still don't have any guest time I have this kind of show. Yeah, a friend of the show. We still don't have any guest episodes. Yeah, but this is, I'm a friend of the show.

Yeah, you are a friend of the show. I'd like to just, you know, anytime you guys need me to pop on. You should get a sponsor on our podcast. Okay. Because we were talking about part of my take on Oh, we're not supposed to say it. We were talking about it. He's trying to silence any talk. We were talking about your podcast on the last episode. We had to bleep it out a couple times. That's smart.

We didn't want to promote other podcasts. I did bring an ad with me from part of my take. Is it for part of my take? Is it one of your sponsors? Every time I go on another podcast, I bring one of my own ads with me. That's very smart. Very smart. So you definitely do have that Gary V type mindset. Yeah, I will

kill my entire family just so that I can see an ad on another podcast. Our thing is like, our, our thing is kind of like, like when a friend asks us why we aren't, why we weren't at the club this weekend, we reply and we say,

or no, they say, so like a friend will come up to me and Roan and they'll be like, like Nick or KB, some of those other guys. And I'm like, Hey man, I didn't see you at the club this weekend.

And me and Rome will reply in sync. I didn't see you at the bank this weekend. Oh, I Rome will reply in sync. I didn't see you at the bank this weekend. Oh, yes. I know. Yes. Okay. Well, you are my accountant. So you are that you are on that hustler mindset.

Yeah, right. Exactly. I never stopped grinding. Yeah. There was a moment in time where I was, I don't want to say friends with Gary V, but we were friendly ish. Cause we, I, I interviewed him and then I played basketball with him a couple times. You did? Yeah, a couple

in the inner city or early morning. He has like a run Thursday mornings. I want to say six to 8 a.m. No way. I would go in. I'd play. Does he play like Manny Pacquiao where like everybody around him has to like kind of let him win and like they kind of get out of the way and give him a boost so he

can dunk. All I'll say is I gary v is actually a pretty good basketball player he does this is also my bias because when i'm not a very good basketball player i pretty much just run around set picks you get it when you fit in right i don't take a lot of shots so i do have a little bit i don't want to say it's animosity maybe jealousy of the guys that basically run three-point line to three point line and jack up shots. Cause I'm out there getting the post. I'm getting dirty.

I'm grinding sweating elbows, shirts and skins. You're slipping off some guys back. Yeah. So you're the kind of guy that you get the ball on there. Let him, let him shoot. Yes.

That once a game, there's a, let him shoot. I shoot, I miss. And then I say, that's on you guys. Yeah.

Shouldn't have let me shot. Shouldn't have let me shot. Yeah. But every now and then I hit it and then I come back down and I shoot, I miss and then I say that's on you guys. Yeah. Shouldn't have let me shot. Shouldn't have let me shot. But every now and then I hit it and then I come back down and I say I'm hot. And then I miss that one. I shoot till I miss. And how did it go in V's league? Did you wind up scoring when you were with V? I think I scored a couple. That was actually how I was introduced.

What was this? Like an exclusive celebrity? No, it was not at all. I don't think a lot of celebrities are waking up at 6am on a Thursday. It's a go-getter league. So it was just like you. I don't think a lot of celebrities are waking up at 6 a.m. on a Thursday. It's a go-getter league. Go-getters get up at 6 a.m. So it was just like you, Gary Vee, and then like a bunch of strangers?

Yeah. That's awesome. But that's the language of basketball, my friend. That's streetball. You go to Paris, France. You don't got to talk to me about streetball. Play ball. That was also when I first started interacting with Kevin Durant online

because I put up an Instagram story being like ball is life. And he replied to the Instagram story in the DM saying, get this trash off my court. That's awesome. I like that. That was pretty fun. Kevin Durant is a very, very funny tweeter. Yeah. He's online as much as you.

Yeah. He has some of the funniest, like, like, like he probably has as many accounts as has to unlimited accounts just has unlimited accounts are you rocking these days just two just two yeah i got two and then we have son of a boy well that would be my other piece of advice we want to circle back to the start is you got to use the main account yeah i do use the main account to start to the conversation though too i don't know how to start the conversation with our podcast what's are you ever gonna merge them what do you mean what are you talking about like you would say you you talk about the stuff on line that you talk about on the podcast right so that is like i feel like it i don't know like you don't want to repeat yourself i don't see roan starting any conversations oh now this is when we need that soundboard

i should wasted i should be better at starting conversations though you're right I don't know I haven't I've just been throwing retweets out there both of you are incredible at starting the conversation on twitter I don't know what my first tweet of the day ever should be it's always too little it's always too little

to matter to tweet about 7000 times a day well but he starts every conversation he's always starting the conversation I know that there's also so do you yeah you do as well but it's our job whenever someone's like hey dude

like you tweet too much like yeah this is my job like I don't I don't like go to your job and be like hey you're you work too hard you're working too much on that Excel spreadsheet. I'm sorry, this is my job. I know it's pretty sweet that it's my job, but yeah, that is my job. And you're doing good at it.

It's important to do well at it. It's important to put a volume out there. I need to start the conversation. Conversation's all it's about. Did you see what our boy Tyler Miller did? The comic books? Refresh my memory on who that is? Our producer Tyler Miller. The one he looks like a longshoreman.

He looks like a farmer. Not Jake. Not Jake Tyler. Jake's problem, if Jake's listening right now, is that guy can't just wipe the smile off his face. He's just smiling all the time. Yeah, he's trying to bring good vibes to

all situations. He's a nervous smiler. You know those type of people? I mean, I was a nervous smiler when I first started. Were you? And now I'm just the angry. Now you're just fucking God. You're brooding. You should go through a God phase. We don't really talk to him. You have like a surly teenager

vibe. It's like a shut up mom type of vibe. Yeah, no, I love being around little sass because it's like, it's almost like swinging a bat with a donut on it for when my son becomes a teenager it's like i've been through this i've dealt with sass yeah what are you gonna do when you're uh just always you know what are you gonna do when your son sits you down he's like i want to start a podcast like let's do it bro i want to start a pod and then you and then you're like and he's like he's like papa he's like hey papa i want to do a father son sports podcast and then you guys do it and you're like you're still like i'm assuming you got a lot of time left on in your career

wrong you do wrong and the end of his rope no you're not yeah i am and everyone's still like oh my god big cat cats like this crazy good sports commentator like nope no one has ever said that's not what people say what have i just done in the last and then and then this hypothetical let me continue to make myself a good sports commentator i don't know you have a big sports podcast that's what i was getting that that from and then and then so everyone's like oh sorry Big Cats is this legendary podcaster. He's coming out of, so maybe you have retired by this time, and he's like, oh, he's coming out of his grave.

He's finally lacing back up the skates, like, let's do it. And you sit down and record the first episode with your son, and he just doesn't have it. It would suck. But I don't think that you would even give him the chance until he's ready to start the conversation. It's not like you would put him on this stage at fucking Juilliard before you heard him sing yet. You wouldn't even give him the chance until he's ready to start the conversation. Yeah. Like, it's not like you would put him on, like, on the

stage at fucking Juilliard before you heard him sing yet. Right. You're gonna fucking find out whether he has the juice, the chops to be a part of my taker. Yeah. And I think that he will. No, I would tell my son is, like, when a football player comes in, like, not gonna let my son play football.

I podcasted so my son... It's too dangerous. So my son doesn't have to, I podcasted. So my son dangerous. So my son doesn't have to. Yeah. Okay. So he could be an engineer or a doctor or a scientist. Stand on the shoulders of the people that came before you type of thing. Imagine it must be terrifying.

It's actually awesome. I'm scared. I'm getting like, I'm getting your 20. So yes, you should be. I just can't imagine having a kid and you just like, don't know what they're going to do with their life. What? What are you going to do with their life. What?

What are you going to do with your life? I know, but like... But you're ready, though. That's how I could tell that you're ready to have a kid. The fact that it's on your mind, you're biologically... You're prepared. Your eggs are going to be expired soon. You should freeze some sperm.

You should just jerk off into an ice cube tray and just freeze some of your sperm in case you need it later on. I do like the idea, though, of going into my son's bedroom when he's 14 and him rustling the things around and closing cabinets and everything. I'm like, what are you doing? I find a

snowball mic and I'm like, what the fuck is this? I told you. I did this so you don't have to it's like that old weed commercial and he looks you in your eyes and he's like i learned from you i learned it from you i learned podcasting from you who showed you this i have irony poisoning so you don't have to he just slowly gets ironic yeah that's a father's worst nightmare yeah the kid winds up ironic yeah he just hates everything but yeah being a dad's awesome yeah i would highly recommend it sounds like it to you as soon as you can as soon as your body is biologically able to produce

potent sperm become a father that's what we say on this show all right all right all sons of boy dads in here. Yeah. All legitimate sons of boy dads. My son would be a son of a boy dad. He is as well. Yes. All men are.

He already is a son of a boy dad. Right. But he would be as well in the future. Right. Going forward. So we have merchandise that's out now. Uh-oh. But the problem is that SAS only wears like a couple items. So how do we sell merchandise that SAS only wears like a couple items. So how do, how do we sell,

how do we sell merchandise that SAS could wear? Okay. Here's an idea. We basically, we hire Caucasian James to create son of a boy, dad merch, and then have him put it out. And then SAS would be like,

Oh my God, I have to have this. That's fucking genius. Yeah. Yes. Not a bad idea. Or have Cody co come on and tell us what merch should look like and then we'll buy it from him for us but from him are you a big cody co guy yeah i i like him as well he's been on part of my take

really yeah yeah he came in the office did you we're codaniacs yeah we're codaniacs you know noel too yeah he was? Yeah we interviewed both of them I didn't know they were on part of my take There's a lot of things you don't know son Me and Noel are good buddies Really? Have you ever seen him in person? How does it work because I think you do have

And I know how it works for me But you have people online Who you consider friends that you've never met Like Caucasian James you've never met like caucasian james you never met yeah i mean but also like me and caucasian james don't like talk that much oh so you're not friends with them okay no we're like we're friends just want to throw that out there he doesn't mean that i have like three james sorry no he doesn't mean that i have i have talked about the badgers that was actually caucasian james slid in my dms yeah it was like i can't believe something about a badger game i was like oh let's roll dude I have talked about the Badgers. His jeep slid in my DMs.

It was like, I can't believe something about a Badger game. I was like, oh, let's roll, dude. You're wide open. Now you have a future. He didn't even go to Wisconsin. He's from Wisconsin. He's just talking to me about the game. That's what guys do. You don't know that. You're just learning. That's why you have no real male friends.

You never talk about the game. Today I went to lunch with my family that I don't see a lot why you have no real male friends because you never talk about the game. Today I went to lunch with my family that I don't see a lot. It was like my dad who I do see. But then everyone else I don't. It was my dad's side of the family. It was like my grandparents, my uncle and my cousin. And my uncle had

a rental car. He's from LA. And they drove us to Penn Station. I walked to the office from Penn Station. And they were just talking about sports the whole time. And I was just like, no idea what's going on. You need to get a basic knowledge.

We need to have like a little recap for you, which is a list of names. Yeah. There's no names. And I remember I was like thinking, and I was like, this is just something I, I don't even have the patience to be knowing all these people.

But all you need is like a basic knowledge of the names. And then Mark Titus, who has, uh, who's a friend of mine, who's a very good sports commentator, uh, and has a podcast like myself, but not really. Um, his whole thing is like, if you can know enough mascots for college teams, you'll always come across as fairly well versed the demon deacons right you're like oh yeah oh you're talking about the yellow jackets georgia tech yeah pretty good this year i think i'm too far gone though i remember when i was little i used to like everyone would talk about sports i remember i used to like try and like wake up and watch espn and i'll just be like

what the fuck is this video games yeah it's just like at the end of the day it's just like not something that interests me you actually should just play the video games. You would learn everything from that. Oh yeah, definitely. I did. I mean, I did. I used to play soccer. I was into like NHL. The game is pretty good. Oh, you played Chell? Yeah. Madden I was never really into. I feel like it was too easy. You hear that, John?

Well, you just run. John is gonna be pissed. He didn't mean that either, John. You just run a Hail Mary every time and you win. Why don't you just put it on like a harder setting? Anyone who plays, John. You just run a Hail Mary every time and you win. Why don't you just put it on a harder setting? Anyone who plays Madden and doesn't do a Hail Mary every single time is a total loser. You're an offensive genius.

Who's playing Madden just like, let's run it on this ball? I like to establish the run. Open up the pass game. I would probably smack you in Madden. Let's do it. We'll set that up. We'll do it live on YouTube.

You don't have a son of a bitch on YouTube. No, it's Lil Sasquatch. Damn, because it's already established. So does that hurt? It's corporate bullshit, dude. Don't even get into it right now. Hurts you more? Yes, it hurts his skits.

Does it hurt you? My skits have plummeted on YouTube. For real? Yeah. Is that because you're not funny anymore? No. The last one got 12,000 views and it got 5 million views on TikTok. Is TikTok fake?

Yes. 100%. Okay. So we shouldn't be quoting those views. No, but it also did well on Twitter and Instagram. This is like when Facebook, remember when Facebook had a whole, they basically spent an entire couple of years boosting everyone's views by an insane amount. And people flooded to there.

They're like, well, this is where I get the most views. They actually killed like a bunch of content creators careers. Like no joke. Like people got money. We're ready to go. Like, look at all these millions of views. And then Facebook was like, whoops, just kidding. We faked everything.

Yeah. No, I think TikTok views are a hundred percent fake. Like when you see a post that has a million likes, that should be something that you've seen on every other platform. If something had a million likes on Twitter, you've seen that video. Don't you think the likes are real?

It would be in the newspaper if you saw that. Beyond Jimmy Fallon. TikTok is like every other... Casual swipe. This one has 70 million likes. Yeah. I want to go back to when you were talking about sports when you were in the car with your family who would who would you have said as athletes like if you just were trying to sprinkle some athletes into the conversation I name dropped I name dropped Karabas so so Ronan and I are talking we're your we're your dad I'll be your dad. I'll be your uncle. Uncle. Yeah. So what do you think?

Buck's sons, huh, son? Yeah, it's a shame about Carabas. You nailed it. You nailed it. Yeah, Carabas and Ortiz, huh? What do you think about that podcast? It's going to be pretty good. And football season is right just around the corner, son.

Who are you excited to watch? I think Jared should be great out there. Yeah, what about the Packers and all the turmoil that's going on there? What do you think is going to end up happening at their QB situation? Or just any QBs you're into. Someone's going to have to do something about that. There you go. You're crushing this.

Who's like a college football player you know? I don't know any college football. I was about to say Patrick Mahomes. Okay, well he did play in college. He used to be a college football player. Yes, he is. He still is any college football. I was about to say Patrick Mahomes. Okay, well, he did play in college. He used to be a college football player. That actually is. He still is a college football player. Keep going. Yeah, that's about it.

That's pretty good, though. You should just actually, you know what you really should do? Because it's clear that you don't want to invest any time in sports, which I'm not knocking. You should just become a hardcore fan of a singular player in every sport. So like in college football this year should just become a hardcore fan of a singular player in every sport. So like in college football this year, just

be a Spencer Rattler guy. He's the quarterback for Oklahoma and just everything is Spencer Rattler. Spencer Rattler. Yeah. And like any time, any conversation that someone brings up college football, you just veer it back to Spencer Rattler. I'm not watching unless I'm seeing the rattle, the rattle man. Yeah. The rattle

snake out there. The fuck is Rattler? Yeah. Put his ass on the field. Oh, you guys like that guy? He's no, he's no Rattler. Yeah.

That actually would work. Wake me up when Spencer Rattler's playing. And if you get the advanced stats, it's like our guy, James, one of one who like has just so obsessed with one player that you can beat anyone in an argument. If you bring them to that player,

it all goes back to rattler yeah you bring all your arguments to your home turf of spencer rattler and then you beat them over the head with it dude and he's cool and he's cool he has a cool name he has a cool haircut yeah yeah yeah oh wait fuck speaking of cool i have something wait i'm gonna come right back you guys talk you guys talk oh fuck what do you think can I get a sip of that diet coke real quick yeah here you can have the rest this is just backwards so do you actually like working

no no not at all why well I could tell I could tell when you did the whole like I'm gonna make all the son of a boy dad videos on my personal YouTube that was clearly a power play so like you've learned your lessons from Alex Cooper and Sophia Franklin a boy dad videos on my personal YouTube. That was clearly a power play. So like you've learned your lessons from Alex Cooper

and Sophia Franklin and you're like this is we're expecting that like we're already like we're pitching it to other to other companies, right? When this we're talking HBO and all that shit. When this split up happens, you have all the IP. Yeah, that's smart. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Okay. And actually I got a big raise with the

podcast and actually got his salary cut he's back he's back i also have the password to his youtube if you want it oh nice i'll start posting some stuff what do you want me to post first i don't know surprise me spencer what do we have here i still don't know what it is

i still don't know what it is what is this jewelry oh yes ron got me a necklace i thought that i thought normal thought we need to get into the chain game i've been telling i ron and i spent some time together uh over july 4th vacation no big deal really what you guys do get into that we just hung out a little bit yeah we went to eastern long island um eli he yeah he met my family which he knows uh but he i was saying i want to i want to be a chain guy i'm not wearing this okay that's fine i'll wear it you're a piece of shit dude just open it literally just open it and look at it and

this is the saint of good gambling luck yes yes san can cayetano open your package and I'm gonna wear it and I'm gonna have good gambling luck and it's perfect because I didn't know what size chain length to get and so I got

without thinking I got 16 inch chains which is about the size of the average neck and so it doesn't hang at all jesus christ it's just a choker bro pop your chain on brother i'm not putting it on what this is what you gotta do you gotta have a neck phobia oh can you come get me you gotta take more risks man this is you know, you know what? You're scared to fail. You're scared to have people say that you miss. Here I am rocking a choker with my bro.

Oh my God. Look at that. Look at that. Yeah, I might cut off my circulation. That's fine. Oh, Jesus Christ. You know what I won't do? Die being not swaggy.

Die having bad gambling luck. Yeah. Fuck that. I'm wearing this shit. Owen, can you get me here? Owen, look at this. You're addicted to Twitter. We're having a conversation.

We're popping out chains with our boys. And I think Owen's actually going to choke me if he gets this on because he's not it's so hard to put on these necklaces oh there we go I'm in Jesus Christ that looks so good do I got any waggle on it or no it's really choking me

now you know the size of your neck 16 inches it's actually 16 and a half so I'm really fitting into this smaller like yeah what were you going to say your biceps 16 inches. It's actually 16 and a half. So I'm really fit. That's like smaller. Like, yeah. Well, we're going to say your biceps. Your biceps are not my biceps are not unfortunately. Yeah, we're going to get you. I was going to say my biceps and then I was like, no, I don't want

to say that's not going to say my dick. Why don't you do steroids? I'm thinking about it. He doesn't want to get. He said he's worried about breasts. Oh, well, as a man who has breasts, it's not that bad. It really is. I said I was worried. I said I want my heart to explode. Oh, as a man who has breasts, it's not that bad. It really is. I said I want my heart to explode. Oh. You're one of those guys? Today, actually, at lunch, we were talking

about steroids. With your grandmother, grandfather, uncle? Yeah, and my uncle was like, my cousin's name is Sam, and he was like, yeah, some of the kids on Sam's baseball team have been experimenting with creatine. Oh, that's not steroids. As if that was supposed to be like a big drop. Right. Like, whoa, shit. Experimenting with creatine. that's not sterile as if that was supposed to be like a name like a big drop

right like whoa shit and i was experimenting with creatine i was like bro i'm on creatine right but it's not doing anything it does i'm fucking inflated actually when i do this when i went to chicago for a week when i went to chicago for a week i keep talking i'm just jiggling my chain you're such a chain guy. It looks so fucking sick. It looks so sick. It looks so bad. I know it looks sick. It looks shockingly bad. What's your problem? Why are you being negative? This is a guest.

This is literally our guest on our show. You can't tell him if anything. I can't believe we got you instead of Tim Dillon. Yeah, but if Tim Dillon had came on, would you have been like, oh, your stand-up comedy joke was so bad? No, I would not have said that. Also, I'm Tim Dillon had came on, would you have been like, oh, your stand-up comedy joke was so bad? No, I would not have said that. Also, I'm not scared of the Delta variant.

Not saying Tim Dillon is, but I'm not. Easy. What? I'm not. Easy, big cat. I'm triple vaxxed, bro. Yeah, me too. I had COVID. I got all of them. You did, that's right. Johnson & Johnson, Moderna, Pfizer. Johnson? Johnson! Moderna, Pfizer. Johnson?

Johnson! Am I supposed to say something? Is that a drop? It's a Joey Molinaro drop, brother. You obviously don't watch Molinaro. Yeah, I fuck with Molinaro. See that bomb he hit? Oh yeah, on the baseball thing? That was an absolute bomb. Hey, what do you guys think about

doing some kind of therapy online? You ever think about that? Yeah, I was thinking about that. What the fuck? Speaking of. Yo, how did you know? How do you know our ads, bro?

Dude, how did you know this? We're into mental health. How did you know that sometimes we all get bullied online and we have to sometimes find somebody that we have to talk to? Yeah, like I've always gotten help, but I'm looking for maybe better help. Really? Look, look, look. Life is full of stressors. It doesn't matter who you are, what you have. Your life is probably stressed.

Rowan, why don't you hop in? Keep just keep going. You may not be feeling down and out and depressed or like you're a total loss a total fucking loser but if you're stressed is high your temper is shorter than usual or even if you're starting to feel strain in any of your relationships wait total fucking loser that it doesn't say that on there are you editorializing bro you're trying to make people who are getting help feel like losers. It's okay to not be okay. It's really fine to not be okay. It's totally okay to not be okay.

You can unload the spread that you can unload that stress and you could talk to somebody who is completely unbiased about your life. Someone who isn't going to judge you or take sides in anything like this guy. Exactly. They'll judge you. It'll be guys why I can't come to him for anything. You come to me for everything. And that's why I go to BetterHelp.

I literally loaned you $10,000 the other day. I went up to Big Cat. That is true. That is true. And that's what BetterHelp will do. I'm in a jam and I need $10,000 quick. Hey, Big Cat, I'm in the hole. Alright. BetterHelp is customized. Look, when there are things that you can't tell anyone. Hey, Big Cat, I'm in the hole. All right.

Better help is customized. When there are things that you can't tell anyone. Look. Or if you feel like you can't unload to family and friends or Big Cat, you need to unload it. And that's how therapy can be. What? Have you ever read before? I'm really.

Better help is customized online therapy that offers video phone and even live chat sessions with your therapist. So you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. It's more affordable than in-person therapy and you can start communicating with your therapist in under 48 hours. Unload the stressors and get some unbiased feedback that you'd be pretty surprised what you might gain from it because it's just feedback tailored for you. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp and son of a boy dad listeners get 10% off their first month at

betterhelp.com slash son. I'm starting to feel a little woozy with this necklace. It's a real life choker. It's like right into my Adam's apple. Let's get you on BetterHelp yeah my friend is about to die in a

suffocation manner once again though that is b-e-t-t-e-r h-e-l-p dot com slash help no boy slash boy slash boy. Slash boy. Slash son.

Oh, fuck. Slash son. God damn it. Is that pretty cool? You know what? We got the son. Yeah, that is pretty cool. Like I wasn't taken.

Yeah. You think you're tougher than the son? I think I'm tougher than the son. If you want a way to feel good about yourself and you don't have to go to therapy, you can go to Roback.com. Use code PMT for 20% off. Wait a second.

Wait a second. What the fuck? What are they? What the fuck? You're competing ads with us. I. Use code PMT for 20% off. Wait a second. What the fuck? Hey, what the fuck? Competing ads with us? I always bring my own ad. Damn it. That is so fucking savage. You wouldn't go to a dinner party without bringing a side.

I bring my own ads. Competing companies. You believe that shit? No, get this guy the fuck out of here. Who booked this guy? Who booked this clown? Just fucking get Kelly Martin the fuck in here. You know what I was watching yesterday after that guy came Who booked this clown? Just fucking get Kelly Martin the fuck in here. You know what I was watching

yesterday after that guy came in to the yak? I was watching the Brandon and Devlin fight and it was just so fucking funny. So good. Brandon Walker. Have you ever seen it before? You do it. You do the Devlin impression. Brandon Walker. How dare you? How could you?

How could you? Fuck you. It's a full yodel. He goes like eight octaves apart. It's so fucking funny. It was a day. I wish I was working here when that happened. And Brandon's just in the milk suit the whole time. Yeah, that was the

worst part is that he just looks like an absolute clown. It's a fight in grade school. It's like the day when there's like a fight or like two people are about to fight out back or something it's just a palpable excitement in the air that shows my dad almost got in a fight today what was really strange with your uncle no stranger stranger i've never seen this happen in my entire life dude it's new york my dad's like not like a hothead so it was like really weird how do you know maybe he's walter white he could be it made me think like he might has he made he maybe has how do you know maybe he's walter white he could be it made me

think like he might has he may he maybe has killed someone before or maybe he's on a cycle right now maybe it might seem something like that we're literally well okay so we're leaving lunch and um my dad's like saying bye to his mom and dad and then some guy comes up and he's like why are you standing in the center of the fucking sidewalk and he was like a he was like a he was like a rich asshole basically right and my dad turns around he's like i don't forget what he said he was like why don't you just go around why don't you just fucking go around us or something and the guy comes back like waddles his way back there and my dad like drops his bag off and they're like face to face with each other and he's like are we doing this and then my grandma had to break it up do you think then we all walked away in silence and then eventually i was like

i had to break the tension i was like that was well that was pretty crazy brawl back there and did it did everyone laugh yeah he just jim halpert looked at the camera do you think that he did that because he knows his son's a badass now and like no not at all i was i legitimately thought it was like a friend because he's from new york i thought it was like a friend from high school and they were like fucking with ah they brought a kiss yeah yeah dude but that's exactly what happened at the at the red sox game when the woman people here are tense the woman was like are you just gonna stand there because i was asking sass people don't like. The woman was like, are you just gonna stand there? Because I was asking Seth. People don't like

when you stand in front of them. She was like, are you just gonna stand there? And I was like, I'm asking my friend if he wants a hot dog! So, Roan was literally getting up. He was like, do you want a hot dog? And I was like, no, I'm fine. And she was like, so you're just gonna fucking stand in front of me? And he was like, I'm just asking if he wants a hot dog. And then Nick and KB just giggled and were like, you're an asshole to strangers.

I was asking him! I was trying to stick up for my friend! I don't think Roon's an asshole to strangers but he definitely is a bit a little bit of like a smart ass no he's got you know he has a quip up from the east coast he's a classic philly he's a classic philly guy battery at you i'll fucking wing a battery but ron it's like someone tells him to get out of the way and all of a sudden he starts like he starts battle rapping them in public that's okay i just undress him he's's like, I am white. I am a fucking bum.

Flat rim. They're like, dude, I was just asking you to, I was just asking if you could move out of the way so I could see the game. I have to leave. We're going to let you go. I really enjoyed this. Friend of the show. I would love to come back on in a semi-regular, doesn't have to be like semi-regular. No, bro, we got it.

We got it. Hey, this is your every quarter, quarterly, yearly? Bimonthly. Bimonth? What is that? Six times a year. Bimonthly? Six times a year. We can put that in. Maybe we go six times a year and then a bonus? Surprise? But you get to bring a

guest for your bonus. Yeah, I'm going to bring Tim Dillon. It has to be someone famous. Okay. Is Tim Dillon famous too? Yeah. I agree. Very funny comedian. He's not famous to me. He's a funny comedian to me, but not famous. Caucasian James. Is he famous? No. What are his

credits? He's got a million followers on Twitter. He's got all the shirts that Sass wears. He's got all the shirts that I wear. Did he make that shirt? He's a designer. Wait, is he making Barstool Sports shirts?ucasian james dude you went for barstool sports nah nah nah what do you think you're some kind of bro oh not a good look bro let me guess you like just go up to chicks and be like smoke show fucking misogynist today we were a legitimate thing that happened was we were sitting at a dinner and my uncle looked at me he was like now you've had dinner or lunch sorry we were

sitting at lunch my uncle looks over i mean he goes so how much does big cat make i know he did all right thanks for coming on you know the answer to that of course i know the answer eighty one thousand dollars an episode apart oh so the price going i heard you so i heard you were still on starting salary well i am but then my commission is eighty one thousand dollars and it's not it's actually it's like winning a golf tournament after we finish the moment we finish it just goes right to my bank account yeah as soon as you press direct deposit press the stop button right i could fart in the mic and it'd be boom eighty one thousand damn it's nice yeah it's nice so sick again i've never let my son podcast but it's a good life no yeah that's nice that's not bad yeah it's not bad it's not you

no oh no god no we are way more than that god no thank you boys also then give me your choker because I'm probably going to lose one yeah so this is my backup all right thank you my backup choker put both the chains together maybe it'll be a real

big boys necklace all right thanks for coming on brother oh thank you thanks brother thank you no thank you Put both the chains together. Maybe it'll be a real big boy's necklace. Thanks for coming on, brother. Oh, thank you. No, thank you. No, thank you. Finally. Is that the whole episode? No, let's do more.

Welcome back to the Son of the Boy.after show. Now that we got that bitch-ass big head out the room, get down to it. God damn. You are reckless, bro. That motherfucker. We didn't even invite him on and you're and you don't care. You'll speak your mind when anybody's in the room. And that's why I mean, like, I'll look him in the eyes and say, I'm a savage. Fuck. I'm a savage. I don't see you at see you at the bank ever You're always at the club You may be fertile but You're not in the fucking You're not in the vaults I look him in the eyes and say bro I don't think you're an electric factory And here Saying shit like that

That's beyond the pale That's crossing a line That's being a little bit fucked up But at the same time though you just got to keep them straight you got to keep the boys i gotta keep it bro i gotta keep him humble that's how you keep barstool's ethos correct that's how you make sure that we don't stray too far that the pirate ship stays its course exactly it's like fucking uh jack sparrow type shit yep have you ever seen caribbean of course i have brother all of the entire trilogy of course brother that's a trick question there's four movies i haven't seen any of it wow all right

well you got a sunken chest yourself brother i can make some pirates jokes sunken chest well you know what helps with my sunken chest bare bottom t-shirts or bare bottom clothing in general the bare bottom makes my chest just explode through the tea. It's almost an illusion. It makes me look like something I'm not. It makes me look jacked. It makes me look sexy. It puts emphasis on the shoulders and the arms,

but it tucks away that belly. And I'm a bare bottoms shorts guy. I actually am wearing bare bottom shorts as we are. Those BBs are BBs. Shut up. They have so many different designs. I know they're actually very comfortable shorts. I like them a lot.

And the worst thing that you could do, I think it's even worse than wearing a shirt that doesn't fit, is wearing shorts that don't fit. There's no faster way for me to tell that someone doesn't have the fucking juice that they probably don't even have like 5,000 followers on TikTok if their shorts are funny. I actually have noticed I was wearing a full bare bottom fit in the gym the other day and these

make, not only does the shirt make me look jacked, but these make my ass look fat too. Which I do like because I have an inverted ass. My ass is legit. You can eat cereal out of my ass cheeks. It's just all the way dipped in. You got a crater ass.

But these make my ass pop. You got to get the Bare Bottom Optical Illusion Collection. If you have ever wanked off to a girl on Instagram, to her butt pics on Instagram, there's a chance that she was wearing bare bottom, that she too has an inverted ass, but it only looks as juicy as it does because of the bare bottom. Of course. It'll make a woman's ass look good, but it'll make a man's ass look incredible. And that's why we're asking our listeners of

Son of a Boy Dad to go to barebottomclothing.com with code SON. That is S-O-N. SON. Fuck yes. And I mean, they have it all. The shorts are 5.5 inch. They have the 7 inch seams. I I mean, they have it all. It's the shorts are 5.5 inch. They have the 7 inch seams.

I have more of a 7 inch seam. And the best part about the 5.5 is like, everyone's like, oh, you gotta wear the 5 inch inseams. But it's like, a guy like me, I don't, I'm not wearing 5 inch inseams, but 5.5, I would think about it. Yeah, that extra half inch. That extra half inch does you justice. Because like, I'm not trying to be going out

just with my dick hanging out, but 5.5 that could cover me up pretty well. That'll just eclipse the tip of your dick. If your dick was Jeff Bezos' spaceship, the 5.5 would just be enough to shroud the cock tip.

The cock pit. The cock tip and the cock pit. Wow, if you say tip backwards, it's pit. That's fucking crazy, bro. Yeah, bro. Wordplay type shit, bro. Bars. I know we just did something here, bro. Don't steal

that from us. Soundboard. Freddie Gibbs is about the bars. Bars. Bars. But yeah, get free shipping on your first order at barebottomclothing.com with code sun that's b-e-a-r like the animal bottom clothing.com use code sun look good feel good have a juicy ass look good feel good juicy ass big arms emphasis on the shoulders and the chest and tuck that belly away seriously if you not engaging, you're getting rid of that thing. Get rid of it. But you know the best part

is you don't even have to get rid of it. Yeah. Just wear some bare bottom. And they will, you'll go from looking like a fat slob to looking like you're six-packed out with a fucking Zac Efron type shit. 12-inch Efron schlong. Yeah. Dude, I've heard crazy things about Efron schlong. Oh, me too.

I heard it's got a rumble pack on it like a nintendo controller i heard he has to tape it up up what do you mean he's got to tape it around his legs no way so long gets in the way shut up i'd only heard of it's vibrating uh you know how like pete davidson's getting all of his tattoos removed because it's like such a pain when he goes on set that they have to like put over all his tattoos. That's why? Yeah, that's why. I heard Efron is getting his dick. He's getting the surgery where they make it smaller. Like lap band surgery for his dick?

Because it's such a pain in the ass when he goes on set and they have to tape it up every time. Yeah, because if he's method acting as a guy with a small penis, no one would be able to. He's like, how am I supposed to get into character when i know what is living inside my pants right now and the co-star whoever is his acting partner in that scene they have to live with his gargantuan fucking and it's hard oil penis no matter what you want to say about like fragile masculinity like it's hard it's hard being around a guy who legitimately has a like a 15 inch dick yeah i saw the video that Zac Efron put on his YouTube page where he put a camera like right next to his massive bulge and went on the train. And the amount of women who are just staring at his dick,

it's disgusting. That is disgusting. The female gays should be in prison. No, there it's just the fact that women are just treating males, male penises, like they're pieces of meat that fires me up. Yeah. It's just, it's not fair.

It's not fair these days because I was all for first wave feminism, second wave feminism, even up to like fourth wave feminism. But that? Fifth wave feminism, just ogling men's penis. Come on now. Just staring at a mushroom. What is this? They're just demanding mushroom

soup out of my fucking sweaty mushroom stamped pants. No. That shit's stamped pants no that shit's not right that's just not right and uh women be better that's all i have to say do better women are trash all right well don't don't go that far okay women aren't trash take it back reel it in a bit reel it in reel it in but if sexuality was a choice why would i ever date and choose a man why would i ever choose a woman if sexuality is a choice never seen a woman be able to rattle off the seattle supersonics roster from 1996 no that's why male companionship is just the best tell me if you think that this is gay what a friend of mine said friend of mine said he wishes that all of us could just date each other instead of having to date chicks. Pause.

Pause. Pause. So, yeah, so it is. And so that's completely. I'm not going to say it, but pause. Whoa. I'm going to have to step out for a second. Oh, pause this man. Clear my mind. Oh, bro. I'm not going to say it, but pause. Whoa. I'm going to have to step out for a second. Yo, pause this, man.

Clear my mind. Oh, no. When bra says some sauce shit. Bra ordered some sausage pizza with pepperoni. Pause. I'm just saying. The only thing he should be ordering is chicken breast, all right? Yeah.

Yeah. Come on now. My man ordered some bone-in chicken tenders. said no pause pause my dog i wouldn't even eat corn on the cob bro no i take that i slice that corn off the cob exactly and i'll shape it into a labia yeah i'll i'll throw the corn my mom asks me if I can shuck the corn on the cob. Or what is it? Not shuck. Yeah, shuck.

Is it shuck? Is it shuck? Is it? Pause. Yeah. I look her in the eyes and I say, pause. Mommy, pause. You got the wrong guy. I say, you talking to me?

You talking to me? Mama, you talking to me, ma? You thinking these hands are going to shuck corn? Hell no, mama. I ain't doing that, mama. Get me my wife beater. I want to get a wife beater. I want to start rocking one of those.

Yeah, that's why you need You can buy like 15 of them For like $3 Yeah I definitely had a phase Where I was wearing wife beaters Under That's not surprising in the slightest

Under my clothes though I wouldn't wear just a wife beater You were definitely You were rap battling With a wife beater on weren't you There were But Slim What if you win

We're going to get every word Of fucking 8 Mile on this podcast this podcast before everything is said and done but where are we gonna go after that the fact that they don't have more rap are there any other rap movies oh well i guess there's a lot of rap movies but there's none like that like what what's one other rap movie roll bounce get richard die trying kind of i take you to the candy that movie's good as fuck yeah it is fitty yeah he's just talking about fucking are you a window shop yeah and he's like window shopping with the girl i love that i love that movie it's actually a really good movie yeah it made me cry when he

sold crack to that mom no wait that's the biggie that's the biggie movie have you seen that yeah and he goes his body's like yo dude he like, you just sell crack to a pregnant lady. And he's like, what do I look like? A damn social justice? Or no, not social. What does he say?

Social worker, social worker. Yeah. Fuck. Hilarious. Shout out to big hang crack commandments, bro. Shout out to biggie though.

Biggie, do you think that selling crack to someone's mom could get you canceled? The answer is no. I don't think so. The answer is no, but, think so the answer is no but uh like it's not like he's just selling like i mean he's just selling drugs like he doesn't be like i i kind of get like he's he doesn't have to pick and choose who he sells drugs to so you would sell to tell crack to a pregnant lady if i was selling crack yeah you would yes not me dude i'd be ethical and i think that people who sell crack to pregnant ladies

should be canceled. I know that this is reverse psychology. You just said that you don't think it should be canceled. Yeah, well, it was reverse psychology. I wanted to bait you into saying it because No, I really, like, I mean, if you're selling drugs, you're fucking, like, I don't know. Like, if you're selling drugs,

you're selling drugs. Like, I don't think it matters who you're selling it to. What about killing someone? Drugs? You think you should be murdering someone? That's cancelable? Yeah. Are you sure? Yes.

How many people have you killed? Bro, tell me you haven't killed someone. Dude. Okay. Time to come clean. Look me in the eyes and tell me you haven't killed someone. I put a brick through the face of a stranger while I was on vacation. They were just sitting drunk on the corner by a church.

We were just on Long Island and fucking whipping around in a Ferrari. What did the Yak boys get into this time? Murder. We were just doing hate crimes. I'm pretty sure that the president of the Philippines would just like ride around. He used to ride around on a motorcycle and just shoot people in the face and he just like confessed it. He used to ride around on a motorcycle and just shoot people in the face and he just like confessed

it. Yeah, that's crazy. It's like American Psycho. Yeah, it is. I watched that the other night. It's a good ass movie. It's so fucking sweet. I love that movie. But he would get cancelled. I love it. The intro of that movie is so good. How does it go? I just know the part where he's like Ever since I was a boy

I wanted to be a serial killer. He's like He's like in the morning i do my he's like in the morning i do my ab exercise or no he's like he's talking about he's talking about working out and he's like he's like in the morning i do my crunches i can do a thousand now i love how he says it it's so funny so is that was the point of that movie that he didn't actually kill anybody killed anybody So he just fantasized about it? Yeah, I think so. That's pussy shit, though. I know.

I don't think I ever even made it to the end of the movie until I watched it the other night. Really? I thought it was a good-ass movie. It is a good movie, but I just wanted him to- A little too ambiguous of an ending for me. Yeah, I wanted him to have killed. I wanted there to actually be blood. Someone, I think we talked about Inception and the ambiguous ending in that, someone dm'd me and they were like bro like inception ending is not ambiguous

like and then he like says his theory on what happens and it's like you realize that like is the definition of an ambiguous ending just because you think something happened and you're like so certain that that's what happened does not mean that it's not an ambiguous dude what happens after you die isn't ambiguous my thought is that you go to a place like the Magic Kingdom in Disney World and the sky's all blue, but so is the ocean. He's like, it's not an ambiguous ending, bro. Like he's just in his reality with his wife where he wants to be. And it's like, but they don't show that off the camera. So it's inferred.

And so it is ambiguous. There is an inference in there. Come on now. Come on. I mean, if you're going to be listening to this podcast. I just learned the word ambiguous pretty recently and now I'm just using it as much as I can. You did? No. I'm kidding. Where'd you learn it? I'm just fucking around. Do you have a word of the day calendar?

Nope. We should start a word of the day calendar from the fucking whatever podcast we're on now. Yeah, whatever one. We do too many, bro. Seriously, bro. How many shows a week are we on at this point? Bro, I fucking put out so many shows. I'm starting to feel like the studio is my second home.

I know. All the days run together. We're going to start having like a Drake songwriting mill where people have to just sleep in the studio. They're just sleeping in tents like, give us a premise. Come up with a premise. We need something to riff on. Dude, being in the studio with Drake is nuts.

Yeah, but it took it back to those days. Fucking Quentin Miller though, man. He fucking blew the whole lid off the whole operation. They were only making $5,000 a month. Really? He was making $5,000 a month to just flip and write shit for Drake. That's crazy. Isn't that nuts? That's not

a lot of money. That's weird. Drizzy's a big, I thought Drizzy was supposed to be like, I've got my boys. That's $60,000 a year. Yeah, he's paying his boys $60,000. Teachers make more than fucking Drake's Ghostwriters. That's crazy. I was going to go into Drake Ghostwriting, but I'm just going to go ahead and teach history to third graders

instead because it's more lucrative. I want to be able to set up my family, so I'm not going to Ghostwrite for Drake anymore. I mean, like, I don't really get the whole, like, the whole ghostwriting thing is weird to me. Why? Like, I guess, like, if you're really famous and you've, like, already, like, had a bunch

of hits yourself, like, I guess ghostwriting is not the craziest thing, but it's, like, people who, like, come out of the gate and they just, like, don't write any of their music. It's, like, so what do you do? Some people just look like they're supposed to be famous, like olivia rodrigo isn't there like a whole bunch of controversy with her like didn't she doesn't she have ghost writers or she's like stealing songs from people or something i think she's just singing like paramore i think paramore is just a style like the way that biggie fathered a lot of rap styles yeah i think that paramore has now just

fathered the careers of olivia rodrigo and Willow and like all these other people, but you could just get a Travis Barker, but that's like, no, drop a couple more names, bro. Show us what you got. Uh,

Tom DeLong, of course, or the guys from, uh, uh, all time low. Shout out those guys. I love those guys.

Friends of the pod, friends of the pod, friends of the program. Mom, I thought it was a phase, that type of shit. Those are those guys. You know what I've been trying to get into is

Screamo. Oh, really? I was listening to Screamo yesterday for the first time and I turned it off instantly. It wasn't for you? I was listening to Bring Me the Horizon. What did it sound like? It was like I looked up a gym playlist and that was the first song and I played it and it was... I was like, this is not for me give a give an impression of uh

i don't even know like i can't even do the impression without like i want to become a screamo artist filthiest shit i ever fucking wrote you saw this kid son of a boy dad new song coming out now let's get him to do that this dude? yeah do you guys ever want an intro song

or you want it uncut? I mean I don't know an intro song wouldn't be the worst but that would be fucking hilarious and I'm dead serious about the soundboard son of a boy dad yeah let's get that happen soundboard coming soon. That would be so fucking funny.

Having Screamo? Yeah, as our intro. But how do we get that guy to do it? He's got 4.7 million watches on that, bro. And that's legit numbers, bro. I mean, we could just like DM him or something. I mean, I'm sure he follows me.

That guy's counterculture, bro. He's in the punk scene. Yeah, he doesn't follow. Dude, I would love to get into the punk scene in New York, but I don't even know what I would wear. I don't even I saw like a punk rave that was going on at a fucking, it was at like a train like a train depot. There's just like a bunch of trains and it looked like

an old west shoot-em-up set or something like that. Yeah. And I wanted to go so badly. I wanted to be included in a counterculture movement, but I don't even have the fucking wardrobe to go there. I couldn't go there in bare bottoms. They're versatile enough for damn near every scenario except for a counterculture. Yeah, it's true. Bare bottom needs to release a countercultural rave line.

We need to or we need to come up with some counterculture rave shirts or something like that. Jankos. All black with white writing on them. We need to get ourselves some Jankos. I want Jankos too, but at the same time. No, I don't think you want them as bad as me. I've owned Jankos before. I don't think you want them as bad as me. I have had Jankos in my life before.

You had them in an ironic way. No, I had them when they came out. I want them in a real way. No, you want them in an life before. You had them in like an ironic way. No, I had them when they came out. I want them in like a real way. No, you want them in an ironic way. I want, I want. You're irony poisoned. I want to be walking around with Jankos. You want to do them as a wacky bit.

I want to actually be incorporated into the goth world or whatever, whatever counter called. I'm sure goth is an outdated term and they'd laugh me out of their fucking. It's actually a slur. Did you not know that? So we'll have to take that out and we'll take care of that jesus christ i don't know how much longer i can work with this guy dude i just don't know the terms change so fast dude the terms are just so in flux like oh the things i was saying yesterday i just wanted to be able to say them and now i suddenly can't

say goth anymore roach it's the times that's... Dylan said it best, brother. The times they are changing. Tim Dillon? I don't like the Delta variant. It's the scariest. Decent. I was trying to think of a Tim Dillon

does Bob Dylan type of situation. Yeah. I had my Quentin Miller, my ace in the hole, decent i was trying to think of a tim dylan does bob dylan type of type situation yeah i had uh i had my quentin miller my ace in the hole best ghostwriter coming up with that shit bro he's unstoppable that was the softest softest yawn i've ever heard i had to mumble it down and then it turned into a little bit of a dylan voice didn't it yeah do. Do you think Bob Dylan was just yawning the entire time? Bro, get a couple of winks to sleep. He had narcolepsy.

Why couldn't you sleep last night? Dude, last night was a fucking nightmare. Well, that sounds like something that happens when you do sleep. I go to try and sleep at midnight. Okay. Sounds pretty standard. Yeah. And I'm like, no, i'm not falling asleep like i'm

having a really hard time falling asleep and then i'm like all right i'm gonna watch some curb your enthusiasm so i fire up an episode of curb your enthusiasm watch it try and go back to bed again and then i'm just like wow i'm like i really am just like really struggling like i'm not tired at all too is the thing and i'm like i really cannot sleep and then around three i get up and i'm like well oh no no that's what happened around three i almost fell asleep but then i'm like fuck i gotta pee really bad and so i get up to go pee there's a glass on my floor explodes no way untouched oh yeah like a poltergeist situation no i touch i kicked it over and it blows up all over my bare feet glass everywhere shut up broken glass

everywhere so then i cleaned that up and i just threw it into owen's room and then uh and then and then uh and then i get back in my room i still can't sleep and then i'm at the point where then you're gonna get to the point where you're like oh okay so like this is a thing now like i can't sleep and then i'm like i'm running through i'm like so do I have insomnia now? Is it like I'm never going to be able to sleep again? Is it cancer? Yeah. And then I'm looking Do my eyelids have cancer? Yeah. So then I'm Googling and I'm like, how do I make myself fall asleep? And it was like no screens.

Tried reading a book or something. So then I put my phone down. But you knew that before. You didn't need to Google to know no screens. I know, but I usually don't have a hard time falling asleep. You just wanted to be reminded of no screens and then put my phone down and i uh read couldn't see but i didn't want to turn the lights on so i just squinted at the letters really hard and tried to read them and then eventually i was like all right well this isn't happening

and then by that time it was like 6 a.m and uh and then eventually i just i must have just fallen asleep i don't really know when it when it happened but it did i was up just as late i know it's funny but also owen doesn't owen doesn't sleep at all yeah owen runs off of like two hours a night and he's fine with that yeah i feel like that uh just trying to get a little bit more wouldn't be the worst thing yeah it just doesn't seem enough yeah two is not a lot and i'm the kind of person i need like 15 hours of pure beauty sleep to to really function but honestly i got like three hours of awake time a day and like that's that i gas out after three i'm like oh my god i'm exhausted you're like the opposite of owen you're a 22 hour a night type of sleeper

but um people who are like people who do brag earnestly about like how early they get up and how little sleep they get like oh went to bed at 3 got up at 8 o'clock this morning 5 hours and like that's like bragging about eating unhealthy food or whatever

psychologists like ate fucking a ton of McDonald's it's like it's probably not good for your brain. Well I think it's also like so I had to wake up early this morning not really i had to wake up earlier than usual though to go meet my dad at penn station for lunch you had to wake up early for lunch yeah and uh well they had an early i mean who eats lunch at 12 o'clock i didn't get lunch i got breakfast most people and then uh i sometimes when i have to wake up early i like psych myself out about it because i'm like okay okay, if I fall asleep right now, I'll get eight hours of sleep. Right.

And then I'm constantly like doing the backwards math. At least now, if I fell asleep, I would still get four hours. I do that before flights every time. Yeah. And then I'm like, well, four hours isn't that bad. And then I'm like, okay, I have to be up in 30 minutes and it was just bad. But I'm actually surprisingly like not that tired. So why are you yawning so goddamn much?

Oh, I'm a little tired, but it's like, like when i get three when i get three hours of sleep i'm usually like i think that you yawn on this show because your brain is giving you the anxiety of having to come up with something to say no and that don't bro don't don't fucking diagnose i just psychoanalyze you don't analyze me yeah don't fucking come in here and analyze me yes bro what do you what are your goals what do you what do you hope to do what do you want in here and analyze me. Yes, bro. What are your goals? What do you hope to do? What do you want in life? To sleep. A nice little spread out in Nashua?

I want to sleep tonight. Ah, you didn't even get it, bro. That was a good whale hunting line, bro. Oh, come on. Come on, bro. Have you never even seen good whale hunting, bro? You're the shepherd. Go fuck yourself.

You're the shepherd. A little spread out in Nashua hell yes bro um yo so uh when people are hearing this i'm i'm gonna be in hawaii you'll be married brother you will have tied the old knot i might be dead too straight up i've heard that people go on honeymoons and just die well let's hope that that doesn't happen. Why? Because then I'm not going to have a fucking co-host, bro. Yeah, but what are you going to do if I die? Quit? Shut up! Alright, please quit and start a Patreon.

If you die, I'll start a Patreon. If I croak, you quit, start a Patreon, make all the cash yourself. It would be a money. It would just be so much money if you died, and then I'd be starting a Patreon. Yo, right, like the first episode? We would make like $100k in a week. and first off you get all the merch money oh yeah like none of it goes to my family none of it goes to barstool you get the merch money oh no it would go i would i would definitely hook up hook up our boys hook up our crew a little bit too yeah i'm like drake

i know drake it's not really about that life but we would give everybody five thousand dollars a month yeah which is not brutal. No, exactly. When we do it, it's nice. When Drake does it, he's an asshole. Well, Drake is rich as fuck. Not that I'm not. And you will be even more so once the insurance... I don't even know because I never see Drake at the bank.

He's always rapping about being in the club. He's never rapping about being in the bank. Damn. What's up with that shit? Yeah, bro. He is. He is not it he's practice what you preach my boy's from canada he's never even been to bank of america no no god knows he's

not allowed in there yeah he doesn't never hit a santander no he hasn't hit a pnc owen shout out santander if anyone wants to hack owen's accounts they know at least where to start i wanted to ask big cat if he has any dirty money. I forgot to though. He obviously does. Oh yeah. You don't gamble for that long and not have dirty money. He actually probably has a bunch of dirty money.

I know. He probably spends his dirty money though. Yeah. Like he probably doesn't currently have dirty money, but the fact that he had dirty money probably lets him have clean money. Yeah, definitely. I wanted to ask him about that. I forgot. We didn't really touch too much on the salary, which I was really looking to get into. money but the fact that he had dirty money probably lets him have clean money yeah definitely i wanted to ask him about that i forgot we didn't really touch too much on the salary which i was really looking to get into yeah how much money do you make and like what kind of girls do you fuck

yeah i know you're married and all but like come on come on i'm not gonna tell anybody come on you're not you're you mean to tell me you're not dipping your pen in the company ink come on seriously who is it wait did you see the most who's the guy that drives up to people and says uh oh the hannah cook one oh my god so funny where the hell was she drove what who who is she with that has that car jeff bezos are you saying that she can't afford that car? I love your car. What do you do for a living? Um, I guess I respond to the right DMs. Respond to the right DMs? Yeah.

Do you think it's scripted? It kind of sounds scripted. No, I work for a sports company. Oh, dope. What company? Barstool. Barstool Sports. Yeah. Yes, it's scripted. What the fuck are you talking about? You saw this dude, Daniel Mack, walk up to Dave during the pizza review.

Like, Dave is the worst actor of all time. He's like, oh, I guess this guy's just coming up to me. I didn't know who it was, but that makes me feel better that it's scripted. I guess I respond to the right DMs. She said that was the joke. Then they just casually drive off.

That was the joke answer. That's obviously actually the real right answer. She's not making that much money at Barstool to have that car, not to be rude to Hannah. Well, she's not full-time. Exactly. She's a part-time employee. I don't know why you're putting her business out there, but I wasn't going to say that. I think it's pretty known she does, what's it called?

She does the advisors. Right. And Tommy's TikToks. I'm in TikToks with Tommy Smokes. Hey, how did you get this car? How'd you find this mansion? Dude, that car was

shockingly nice. $280,000 car. And she's just whipping that thing around. But have you ever seen that, I mean, there's a lot of financial literacy podcasts that would be having a hearty laugh at her expense. I mean, our boy Gary Vee is one of the prototypes of being like, your car is something that you buy to impress other people who you don't even give a fuck about and they don't give a fuck about you.

Gary Vee rides a moped around, a used moped, 400,000 miles on it. Gary Vee rides the moped around from that. What's that Andy Samberg movie? Hot Rod. He rides that moped. He just puts a pedal on it. He puts it in neutral and just hangs on to the back of UPS trucks as they drag him around. Bro, you can't pay for your own gas, bro.

We saw that guy riding a bike with no tires. Oh, my God. We saw a guy riding a bike with just the rims of you saw a guy riding a bike with just the rims of this bike what no tires just the rims how is it propelling forward it was like the the metal rim oh oh so there were tire like the tube the tire tube was off got it got it of a motorcycle we were like no of just a regular bike oh and we were like dude i would rather i think either nick or kb or i forget who said or owen they were like i would literally rather somersault everywhere instead of overdoing that it was i've never seen that in my entire life just like screeching with sparks flying up off the road that does every pebble you hit is just hurting your ass that sounds terrible yeah and imagine the handlebars must have just been

vibrating that doesn't sound fun at all no it was funny though it's a funny sight to see yeah fucking clown but i feel like bikes are so easy to have steal and acquire like people are just like always have like random people just have a city bike that they're just posted up with like standing still with their city bike like that's obviously you've stolen that city bike and gotten it off of the grid oh yeah you're a city but sometimes if you go places you'll just see one like on the side of the street and that's what i mean it should be easy to acquire uh a bike tire like sealing a city bike i don't know how that works though because unless you like push someone off of it and steal it from them because like you get charged a lot if you don't like have it back in time well actually

i think they just changed i think now you just get charged by like the minute or something that you're on it it used to be if you you got you got to get it for 30 minutes and then if you didn't have it back in 30 minutes they would charge you 40 dollars like on the 31th minute 30 31st minute 31th the 31st minute they would charge you 40 you need to go back to school bro i looked at my bank account and i was like what is this charge and i was like oh my god i was one minute late damn that's just the fucking that's just de blasio though it should be like a library book i know like you don't have to return that shit yeah or like at most they they charge you the how much the book cost yeah yeah i mean i would never want one of those things those things suck library books yeah they stink they're like smelly they like feel old it's like yellow

libraries dude and librarians oh my don't even get me started the only thing that they're good for is using the computers off record so you can look at porno in public i love looking at porn on in the libraries if you're listening to this go to the library right now and pull up Son of a Boy Dad on every single screen and play it out loud. That's a fact. And if you do that and you send us a video of it, we'll send you free merch. If you can show us that you have Son of a Boy Dad on seven screens.

It doesn't have to be a library. It could be like a computer lab at your school or something like that. Computer lab, yes. If you can get it on seven screens or more. No, no, I don't want seven screens. I want the... Yeah, seven screens, I guess screens because if people can do it at their home if they can show us seven screens of simultaneous no i think we got to go i want a full row of a computer lab okay a row of a row of screens we'll send you free merch yes that we promise that we

promise that's a good promo are you that would be such a funny clip too are you gonna wear the son of a boy dad shirt? Yeah. Just like around? Yeah. I'll wear them. Even though they're white? Yeah.

I've never seen you wear a white shirt. No, I wear white shirts all the time. Under your shirts? Yeah. So you're going to wear it under your shirt? No, no, no. I'll wear a white shirt. We need to get sweatshirts.

Yeah. We got hats, posters too. I like that touch. Yeah. That's huge. Is that you Owen? Mm-hmm. That was a nice touch.

I want one of those. People are still clamoring for Martin Luther King was a good guy. I know. Yeah, I know. Martin Luther King is the GOAT. Yeah, Martin Luther King is the GOAT. People want those. People have sent me them a lot.

I know. I've seen mock-ups. But to this day, people are fucking clamoring. Yeah. Can we do that? Can we do that? Are we allowed to do that? I mean, I don't care.

Do we have to give the cash to Coretta Scott? Do you think it has to go to the next of kin? Like you think that Martin Luther King's estate has lawyers that they're going to try and split it like we did with the Sons and Ford guy? Yes. We'll do a rev share with the Sons and Ford guy. Sons and Ford? Sons and Ford.

Have you ever gotten your ears cleaned out? Bro. You're about to get your ass beat. You might have a massive earwax buildup. I want to get a fight in. I want to fight really bad so that we can clip it. Me and you fight? Come on back in.

Big Cat's back. Sorry. I forgot my Diet Coke. Bro. Callback. come on back in big cat's back no I just sorry forgot my diet coke bro call back that was a full call no no no big cat I was about to beat his ass

I was so fucking close for promo you were just looking for a fight I was so close to beating his ass and I know you dude I know you whip ass and you knew I would've oh dude I know you you don't back know you'll whip ass. And you knew I would've. I know you. You know I would've. Oh, dude, I know you. You don't back down from a fight. Whether they be a Dominican woman

at a Yankees game or your dad's bully who stopped him. No, my dad won the fight, by the way. Did he? I don't think I cleared that up. Yeah, it seemed like the guy turned and walked away. It seemed like the portly rich man kind of sunned your dad. Yeah, the guy walked away. He did? And your dad just stayed there? My grandma's's like you don't

know who has a knife for a gun it was like a 50 year or like a 60 year old white dude in like vineyard vines head to toe would have been very surprised if he just like pulled out a glock or like a massive knife yeah it was like an 11 inch blade yeah he's got one of those like holsters on his leg like he's rambo yeah he just like does a somersault into like a fucking blow dart that he fucking shoots at your dad's neck tranks him it was funny though because i was telling my dad i was like i was like i've lived in new york for over a year now he grew up in new york so like obviously he's lived in new york but i was like i've been in new york for over a year now and you've been here for an hour and I was like

I've never even once came close to any sort of like physical altercation and he somehow got into one within the first hour and it's I mean you're not completely non-confrontational in public like you'll you'll whoop

it up in public I guess the closest I ever came to fighting someone which it wouldn't have been a fight it would have been me getting killed was when we were me and owen were getting out of our uber to the office and we're walking in we see like jeff d low and a bunch of people from the office and uh us like a construction dude bumps into me and i'm like oh sorry and then he turns back he's like what the fuck bro and he's like he's like and i'm like i'm just like keep walking and he's literally just standing there yelling at me my entire way into the store he was yelling at you through the window yeah yeah

i was legitimately like i'm about to walk out of here and get my ass beat would uh like jeff d lowe have had your back do you think? Don't think so. Really? No even with calves like that Cleveland calves he could have stomped a hole through this guy I don't think Jeff D. Lowe would have had my back he could have stomped this guy through the fucking equator and I would have appreciated that yeah I mean if he was actually your boy yeah or dad

he would have helped you out or my son or your son but he's of no relation no he's not we should have like tiers of membership like a son a your son, but he's of no relation. No, he's not that. We should have like tiers of membership. Like a son, a boy, a dad. Yeah.

Dad, you have to pay like 10 K a month and we'll suck you off. Shout out to all of our dads out there. So I don't sell it to all of the dad tier members. You guys are literally paying our fucking rent. Love you guys. And the sons, we,

we won't be able to suck you yet, but keep on grinding and you'll be able to make it to a tier. Get your money up. It's like Joel Osteen's churches. You just need to work your way up to get good favor with God. Or in this case, the hosts of the show. Lil Sasquatch.

Yeah. Good shit. Let's get the fuck out of here. Alright. Thanks for listening guys uh see you next week see you next week peace