Son of a Boy Dad - Son of a Boy Dad: Ep. 5 - NFL Columbine

Episode Date: June 23, 2021

-- Sas & Rone discuss trench coats, Pepto Bismol, the U.S. Military, & of course, beerYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. What is up, everybody? Welcome back to another episode of Son of a Boy Dad. It is Tuesday, June 22nd. I am here, Lil Sass, with my co-host, Adam Ferron. Yes, sir.

Shout out to our sponsors, armor water the barstool sports book and four hymns and four hymns four hymns are you are you too young to be getting boners because four hymns will just give you one anyway four hymns the reverse viagra for when you constantly are getting boners and need to have them pushed away. It dissolves your boner. That would actually be a good idea. A boner suppressant? When I was younger, I used to get boners all the time.

When you're in eighth grade and you're just really horny. I used to Google how to get it to go away. I just told you to jerk off. There's no solutions. You were jerking off and your boner persisted through your jerk off. There's literally like, when you're that young, there's nothing you can do. But also at the same time, my dick was really small.

So like even, I don't think anyone would even know if I had a boner. Like I could like stand up wearing khakis and no one would know. It was fully at a 90 degree angle from your body and no one didn't even pleat your pants. It just looked like the part of the, it part of the zipper part of the khakis. Are you saying that your cloud of pubes over your dick was holding more weight of your pants than the erect penis underneath it? Probably. I don't, I mean, I didn't

even have pubes until like I was a late bloomer. Late bloomer when it comes to the pube game. Did it happen to your armpits first or did it just... Yeah, I definitely had armpit hair way before I had pubes. I had bald bald pubes until i was like 10th grade there's not a single stitch of hair i remember i had like one ball hair for a while you know you just get one and i used to cut it with with nail clippers was it uh like the thickness of a regular hair or was it just like

no it was one thin black hair. Yeah, just... And I was like, what the fuck is wrong with me? Like that it was growing out or that you didn't have more of them? I didn't have more. I thought I was just always going to have one single pube. I remember there was a fucking kid in sixth grade who was putting deodorant on his armpits. And he was like the first person I saw that had hairy armpits.

This kid, I mean, he was five, six and he could dunk. first person i saw that had hairy armpits this kid i mean he was five six and he could dunk he was obviously progressing at a faster rate but yeah jarring when you find out that people are fucking sprinkling hair on their bodies yeah it's because i remember i was in like 10th grade like again i didn't have any pubes and and this one kid that i was friends with we were walking home from school and i remember he showed me his pubes like like the two kids that i was with were looking at their pubes and they had like dad they had like dad bushes and i was just bald and did they pressure you to show yours or like you were asking them to show theirs and you just changed the subject when it was your turn i was like dude i'm not

gonna fucking do that you guys are gay i proved that you guys are gay My first pube grew out of the tip of my dick Like a rose Growing through the crack of like Of the paper Ew that would be so fucking gross It was just like slithered out of like the top of my Of my dick and I had no other puse And it just like split my

Split my dick hole Like Timothy Green Have you ever seen that movie? Is it about a kid whose pube grows Timothy Green is the movie where the kid has the leaves that grow out of his ankles what? is it a Disney Channel original?

no his parents planted him his parents couldn't have kids so one night they got drunk and they took a shoe box and they wrote down a bunch of qualities that their child would have and then they threw it in a box and buried it. And then one night the box got struck by lightning and the kid came to life. Sounds like the dad was jerking off in a flower pot like Harvey Weinstein.

The Harvey Weinstein story. I bet Harvey Weinstein produced it. He was probably just trying to normalize people jerking off in flower pots. Probably. How was the seed planted? Just their like letter was all that their wish that's all it was the magic that's all they needed i saw that movie when i was younger i was probably in like seventh grade or so and someone set off fireworks in the in the or not fireworks fire crackers in the theater no way yeah so you thought that someone was you thought there was a theater

shooting i was getting shot up. Shut the fuck up. It was two girls that did it. Not funny. Not fucking funny. Not funny, ladies. That shit's not funny. Okay? Don't fucking cry fucking fire in a movie theater.

That's not funny 101. It was crazy. I just remember smelling smoke and everyone's like running. Did you protect your mom? Were you ready to be a man at that point in your life? No, I was young. So she was protecting you. That was one of my two active shooting scares.

Have I ever told you the story about the other one? Did we talk about it on the podcast? Because if we did, that would make for a horrible retelling. I don't think we, I don't remember. The story where I got dropped off at school during the lockdown? No. Well, I was. Definitely not.

I would have remembered your accident. I was in eighth grade or i was in i was in i was a sophomore in high school and i uh i got dropped off at i got dropped off at school and there was two sides of our school so one side was like the high school side and one side was the middle school side and if you were getting dropped off you got dropped off on the middle school side like everyone did and you would just walk down to the high school side if you were in high school right and um i didn't have my license until i was a junior so my mom would drive me and my two little sisters to school and you had to wait until you got pubes

to get your license yeah they wouldn't let me get them because i didn't have any pubes and so we get dropped off and we're like walking in. And at this point, it's like no one else my age is getting dropped off for school by their parents still. Like most of the kids were getting rides from like older siblings and stuff. Older kids at school probably. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But not me. I got dropped off by my mom.

And so we go in. We walk into school and there's a lockdown alarm going on. Which means like there's basically that just means that there's someone shooting up the school. Had the alarm ever gone off before? No, we just did drills of it all the time. And it was actually going off? It was actually going off. And teachers are

running around. I literally witnessed the principal of the school take a kid and throw him into the cafeteria and and slam the door. Oh, maybe you did tell this because that sounded familiar. Did I say it on the podcast? Do you know, Owen? I don't think I did. I don't think I did either.

Might have been in the Kansas City episode. Maybe. The forgotten Kansas City episode. The forgotten episode. I mean, if the people clamor for it, we can't give it to them. We can't release it to them yeah and release it and and yeah so there's the principal throws a kid into the into the cafeteria and i'm like what the fuck's going on and then he's like everybody get to a room and so i'm like we're all sprinting

up the stairs but keep in mind i'm on the middle school side so i'm like 16 and i'm with a bunch of like 10 year olds and we're all, they're literally like, I'm running as fast as I can and they're literally at like my waist. And then I'm like, and then for a second I was like, Oh, they all think that I'm the shooter.

That's just me and a crowd of 10 year olds and we're all sprinting into a classroom. And you're kind of a school shooter presenting anyway. I was back then too. I, that was back when I was like listening to all like suicide boys and puya yeah big time you were definitely on like the school's watch yeah yeah they probably saw you coming to the middle school side and pulled the alarm and then we uh so i'm sprinting with these kids and everyone's going crazy everyone's screaming and um and then we got into a classroom and we're all hiding and then all of a sudden the principal came over

and he was like, sorry, that was a false alarm. Which I don't really know how. How the fuck is that a false alarm? It's pretty hard to fuck up a false alarm. It's either someone is shooting people or they're not.

Oh, he was just playing basketball. What the fuck are you mistaking for someone, for an active shooter running around a school? No, I really don't know. But yeah, that was a. Was it traumatic for you? It wasn't very traumatic for me.

It was more just like a... It was a funny story. Which one was a scarier experience? Probably the... Probably the movie theater one. Because you just heard the shots. We literally thought we were like dodging bullets i mean you don't it's not every day where there's firecrackers just exploding in the movie theater

no it's extremely fucked yeah it's i mean and it was like two teenage girls you don't think of girls as ever doing no actually has there ever been a girl school shooter i don't think so no i think there was one who tried to shoot up the white house but like she like got shot in the head or something before she made it in you're talking about the woman who stormed the capitol it wasn't that it yeah she like drove her car she was like with her baby too a girl tried to i know a girl strapped the baby up with an a-kit but that just shows how much us guys have to go through like i know women have such great they have it so much they don't have to shoot up anything and we have to do all the hard work exactly it's bullshit they're they never are or they're never even getting put on watch lists they're not suspected of it they

don't do it because they don't have enough stress in their lives actually it's the young men that are going to it uh sexually deprived young men yeah whenever you hear like uh kids in high school shooting up a school because like they're not getting pussy it's like dude like no one's getting pussy in high school like just fucking wait like it has nothing to do with like it would be cool if like school shooters became the new like jocks yeah dude i like the cool kids or like uh the girls like like the girls all dude i'm so sick of playing football like i don't even get any puss all the school shooters are taking all of it all the puss girls love school shooters these days i just have to present as a school just kidding we don't we don't uh condone school shootings or school shooters these days. I just have to present as a school shooter. Just kidding. We don't condone

school shootings or school shooters. But if school shooters are... Play a fucking sport, bitch. Man up. No one on the soccer team's ever school shot. No, exactly. No one on the football team either because they're getting too much puss. But I think that there is like a make-a-wish foundation, like get some pussy

for these kids before they shoot up a school type of thing. It should be. It should be like a type of thing where you just go to the hospital and you just get fucked once like well i guess there is something to live for subsidizing sex workers so kids can fuck like once sex works work becomes illegal in the united states like there should be a certain amount of them that are fucking at of age at risk students who like might be on a watch list yeah yeah people who like googled certain things you're from so were you from philly um like in the city or are you from outside of the city i went to high school in the city but i lived in uh like delco like right outside the city so like you were in like uh so what was your school big it was a big school

and it was in the hood yeah yeah, that's what I was thinking. The city makes sense. There was one day where we heard gunshots outside the school. We had a bunch of threats at our school. Really? Not so much when I was in high school. More so when I was in

middle school and elementary school. There would constantly be bomb threats. I remember one time my best friend at the time when I was in middle school and elementary school, there would constantly be like bomb threats. I remember one time my best friend at the time when I was in like second grade or something, his neighbor who we would always hang out with, he like went to the bathroom during school and just the trash can was on fire. What the fuck?

Some kid just lit the trash can on fire. Where? And we would always be getting like, like we, I remember one time I was at the library and we had to get evacuated because some kid had like a knife threat, which I don't even know how that happens. Was your school good at sports? Because it seems like your school is known for the freaks.

Your school might have been the situation where the school shooters were the jocks. No, we were really good at lacrosse and football. Did the lacrosse players ever just wear trench coats to fit in? Just so they seemed like they had like clout around the school not quite i always thought it would be a funny uh probably not yeah it would yes it would i thought it'd be a funny video idea to wear a trench coat into the office and see what anyone says anything present as a present does not even acknowledge it just come in with a massive leather

trench coat on. And like sunglasses. Yeah. People would definitely think that it was a... But it's also bullshit that they've like co-opted trench coats as like, no one even can wear trench coats anymore. No, definitely not. And actually, there was a kid at my college who would wear a trench coat and I fucking

hated it. It would make me so uncomfortable. Because you got spooks. I literally texted my mom and I was like, this kid wears a trench coat. It would be like 90 degrees out and he'd be walking around in a black leather trench coat. Maybe he's just self-conscious about his legs.

He'd wear shorts with it. That's what I mean. He's wearing shorts so he could be cool, but he doesn't want to... Maybe he has weird knees. It would genuinely make me mad. I would be like, dude, just take that fucking thing off. Like you're scaring everybody here. Like when we're all in the cab, we're all in like this, this is the dining hall eating dinner.

And then all of a sudden some kid just walks in with a massive trench coat on. It's like, oh, here we go. Just on edge. Yeah. You need to, you should have school shot him for looking like a school shooter you should have preemptively self-defense with self-defense trench coats aren't acceptable in 2021 it's not but i mean there are like long coats long coats had a year this past year i don't know how much you follow the uh in the city they definitely do in the city for sure you go up into like central park all the girls are wearing

long leather jackets. Or that one account where the guy's always taking pictures of people on Bedford Avenue in Williamsburg. You know what I'm talking about? The guy's always snapping photos. I know he's in your algorithm, Owen. I'm not on TikTok, bro. You know this. Stop lying.

I haven't had it on my phone in like over three months so how do you post videos to it how you can post videos from desktop and you just think of it as a time suck that just sucks too much of your time it ruins my life why literally because you can't put it down i can't put it down and i'm just like i get like so mad while i'm on i'm like i hate the comments i hate the content on it like because you're just spending time on the things you i mean it's like you need more music that's where the that's where the goodness is you consistently see the exact same video with the exact same like you'll go scroll like five times and three of those videos will be the exact same thing like the exact same

thing but that's the point i think that's the point of the algorithm but it's so dumb like i i can't enjoy that at all and i used to get mad i used to be like oh like you're stealing this i already saw this before but then i was just like oh that's just like what tiktok is what about finding new restaurants or finding a new workout routine or finding uh no the workout routines on tiktok are so dumb shut up dude you're fucking jacked right now from the workout routines there's no chance that they don't do they don't like all you gotta do is just normal compound movements like they do. They'll be like great curl exercise and they'll have like the – this will be like the barbell and they'll be like – Make an S curve out of it?

Yeah. They're like swinging their hands around. This is great to work the entire bicep at once. It's like that you're going to explode your shoulder doing that. All of your heroes and all the heroes of our day are on there and they're going to be on there. If you want to know anything about the celebrities of tomorrow, that's where they're at right now. Also, what pisses me off is when a celebrity like an A-list celebrity will go on TikTok and then all the replies are like D-list celebrity TikTokers who are all like commenting. And they're like, oh my God, Will Smith, so glad you're on this app.

Like they like- Thinking that there's going to be an interaction. And then there usually is too, which is the worst part. Because there's somebody running it. Yeah. Or like then all of a sudden they're in Jason Derulo's house the next day. With a shirt that's changing colors. Yeah.

Derulo is such a fucking beast bro Did he quit TikTok? I haven't seen his TikToks in a while No You deleted the app But he was like big I haven't seen him in three and a half months Like that

That saved his career In a way Yeah Definitely I mean now he has like He probably has multiple songs In the top 200 It definitely did

And he was a beast on TikTok Yeah he was He was on that battle rap show That I wrote for really it was Derulo against Liam Payne did you meet him

yeah it's awesome he like showed me one of his like the move where you like slide like do like

a sideways move yeah yeah yeah I was like dude teach me that move Derulo did he oh yeah he broke it down for me

he like took me outside he was like throwing water on the ground so I could like kick it up a little bit like the Chris Brown video or whatever. None of that happened either. Good ass dude. Solid ass dude.

Did you actually meet him though? Yeah, I think I've met him. I'm pretty sure I've met him. Oh, so you haven't. You don't meet Jason Derulo and forget about it? I mean, he was... Yeah, I think he might have talked to him once or twice. You've obviously never worked in television, my bro. You obviously have never put in time

on a network show. Derulo's always walking through those doors. Oh my God, dude. He practically is second home. All the fucking time, bro. Who was the most famous person you met? Puth, I guess. I don't know.

Puth is super TikTok famous. Puth was standing in a circle with all the backstreet boys talking about all the pussy he got and it was really i swear i swear to god it was like they were all just like standing there because like did he does he does he pronounce it puffy it's a poothy he just loves he was drowning in Puthy. I'm getting so much Puthy. He was really, because they had a line where, like, they had the song, like, I want it that way. And they had a line where it was like, why won't you go away? And they were, like, practicing it all together.

And he just, like, walked up to, like, the semicircle group. And, like, one of the first words out of his mouth was, like, yeah, like, I brought this I brought this 10 back to my apartment last night. I was like, damn, bro, you're actually super famous and you're still just so insecure that you had to jam it down other people's throats so you're getting poofy. But that being said, that little scar he has on his eye. You know, he's the person

that came up with the I'm hungies thing. He did? Yeah. He was the original hungie? He's the I'm hungies. The original tweet was when Charlie Puth is hungry, he tells his Uber driver, I'm hungies thing. He did? Yeah. He was the original hungie? He was the I'm hungies. The original tweet was when Charlie Puth is hungry, he tells his Uber driver, I'm hungies. And he came up with that? Yeah, that was like the original. Wait, so he's the godfather of singi too? In a way, yeah.

And numbies. People are really using the singi thing. I'm hearing it a lot, and I'm not getting much credit for it. Yeah, because Charlie Puth started it. I've seen multiple occasions where Mr. Portnoy is using it. Mr. Portnoy is? Dave.

Well, Dave isn't singy. I just saw a picture of him fucking nuzzling. Maybe throw me a tag. I don't know. Or at least have the GF tag you. I know, right? Not singy. Doghouse meme. Fucking if he's going to be burying his neck in the fucking in the gf people don't know that you were in the background of that picture on the on the uh on the pj when it was you portnoy his girlfriend and you were this you were the i mean

you're more singy than him i know i. I was there. Yeah, that was fucking classic shit. I was all Ativan'd up, though. I don't really remember it. Yeah. Wait, what? Ativan is... Oh, that's a relax... Yeah, it's a benzo. That's an anti-benzo.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's what you were on when we were flying out to Kansas City. Yeah, during that crazy turbulence where you were geeking out. You were geeking out. Land this plane now! No, Sash was... geeking out you were geeking out land this plane now no sass was he had the highest register of screen that i ever heard he was fucking you weren't there when i talked about that on the yak and everyone was pissed at me they were like they were like dude like you're just gonna go and talk about rome like this when he's not even there to defend himself clearly he was at a moment of like clearly he was in a moment of need of vulnerability that was the same flight where that was a crazy

flight though i just remember like not being nervous at all and then i look out the window and we're just in like a fucking tornado or some shit yeah our plane was getting whipped around like it was going down a toilet bowl it was like going in yeah it was like wizard of concentric circles like that scene in wizard of o Oz where the house gets swept up. It was very much like that. Like, we weren't going the direction that the plane was headed. Like, the nose was going one way,

we were going sideways. They say the safest place during a tornado is the eye of the storm. That's true. We tried to just fly in the eye. On that flight, too, like, a guy got up to use the bathroom, and I was so on edge

that I thought that he was about to, like, hijack the plane. And so I got up in the aisle and like squared up with him. No one's taking this plane down with me on it. Let me shake your hand. Shake my hand. Shake my hand. People get so fucked up for flights.

Like people are so scared that they just have to get shit faced and then just wind up having It is crazy that like it's that's like that people get that scared because like i i so i am very scared of flying but like when you really think about it and you like look into it more like it really is like not dangerous at all i can't believe you're saying this because like no i had four weeks ago i feel like an awakening you did yeah Because you were scared as fuck. I know. But I was brave and you were scared. I'm not scared anymore because like I watched all these, like it sounds crazy, but I watched all these documentaries on this channel five, Flights from Hell. And like even the planes, they'll be like quadruple engine failure and the plane still

like safely lands at the airport. Yeah. I think that a plane hasn't crashed from turbulence since like the 80s or something like that yeah turbulence ain't bringing it down no no they got those big ass fucking i mean i would i would never fly on one of those tiny ass planes though well the one i mean other than when you're on with dave and his girlfriend yeah that's as small as i would go though yeah no it's not a problem also if you get an offer to go on a plane with portno you take that off right away yeah what all the i mean tell them how much pink whitney you guys dragged on that

fucking flight you guys were just cracking like nips of pink i was shitting pink for about a week after that that is one of the underrated features of pink whitney it turns everything turns your like everything everything my it was pissing pink you're oh yeah calm was pink dude i had a i don't remember what medicine it was but i did have a medicine that gave my my cum like a greenish hue hue like you could see hue when i took uh when i take pepto-bismol it makes my mouth black and i am swear to go and it's and it's not it's not a very uncommon thing what like my tongue turns legitimately jet black i woke up and i was like i'm gonna i think i have to go to the hospital i think we need to get you some pepto-bismol no dude like and no it makes my breath smell and taste so bad it's foul how is that possible oh and are you looking it up i swear

to god it seems that seems like a lie to god it's a thing. That seems like a lie. I swear to God it's a thing. No offense. Like my teeth had like black on them. From Pepto-Bismol? From Pepto-Bismol. That's fucking nuts. And I've taken it twice and it's happened both times. Yeah, like that.

That? Okay, that's not pitch black, but it's still very disgusting. Mine was black. It was blacker than that? Way worse than that. That's fucking foul. And then I brushed my teeth and i brushed it all away and then it came back an hour later what yeah so it was below the surface below the subcutaneous oh

ew it looks like she swallowed black paint that's what mine looked like have you ever did you ever chew uh did you ever chew on like a pen and have it explode in your mouth no no no but that happened to a kid that I sat across from in school and I was like what the fuck yeah but I mean that's what it looks like it looks exactly like that it actually happened to me more than once in my life

and it's just like oh fuck you taste that like spicy little spicy blackness of ink in your mouth it's fucking foul. That's the kind of thing that I think would make me sick. Did you throw up after? No, it was just foul.

It was just disgusting to have to rinse for a long ass time. My aunt used to tell my cousin when he was lying, when he was a toddler, when he was lying, that if he lied, he'd have a black spot on his tongue. Yeah, my aunt used to tell my cousins that if they got out of bed during night, that their toes would bleed. What the fuck parents do some weird shit i used to think that's gotta be something you're just like super tired and you just like need to come up with something to get

them in bed it you'll you'll fucking die if you get out of bed if you say a fucking word you'll die so even if there's an emergency test it test it that's probably what benoit did benoit was probably just fed up with his family he was fed up with his kids breaking the rules and it's a wild i mean it's just a wild move to but you can't just lie to kids they just don't they don't fucking know no you can easily they truly don't know i i think that you'd be disturbed if you took whatever medicine I took and it made your cum green. No, I don't really get disturbed by shit like that.

By green cum? You think that a black tongue would disturb you? The black tongue is different because that's in your mouth and you're tasting it. Yeah, I don't understand how Pepto-Bismol can do that. It's so pink. I'll literally look it up right now. It's definitely a thing. I just need you to do it. I just need you to

take some pee. Next time you have nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, or diarrhea, just take some Pepto-Bismol and show me your mouth. Oh, look, a black stool came up too. Fucking. So, Pepto-Bismol.com is actually saying this?

Yeah, look, I'm on that too right now. Bismuth? It's the bismuth that's doing it? And when it combines with the sulfur that is naturally present in your mouth and digestive tract, this can sometimes result in a black tongue or black poop. Dude, so you have extra... It would be way funnier if you're like, or black shit. You have a...

The amount of sulfur present in your body when you take the... You have too much sulfur. ...determines... Shut up. ...if and to what extent you experience the black tongue and black shit. You have a surplus of sulfur. I must. What does that mean?

Probably on my way out. You definitely are. If you're not living, you're... Time's ticking. time's ticking time's ticking uh the sulfur is found in a lot of foods meat and poultry especially ham chicken duck turkey that makes sense i'm a fucking heart and liver you've been eating duck nobody being a lot of chicken duck liver fish and seafood most types of fish shrimp scallops mussels prawns so it's in everything i've been eating chicken for breakfast, lunch, dinner. Oh, and is this true?

Has he been eating chicken for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? No wonder you're getting so many fucking gains. I know. I'm getting fucking jacked. What are the fucking gains like, bro? Dude, I'm just the strongest anyone has ever been in the entire time. Are you 180? Shirt off, shirt off.

No, I'm not 180. It's parps off. I'm like 173 probably. Fuck. I'm down to 168, so you got me, bro. I know. I'm way more jacked than you. Well, I just...

I was deadlifting 225 for reps the other day, bro. Yeah, but your form was... No, my form was impeccable. You were hunching your back like you're doing cat cow. My back was as straight as an arrow. My back was like Frank the Tank's back when he was playing Oculus. Frank the Tank's back is so fucking straight. It's insane.

I hope people know that. It could not be any more straight. It's as straight as like a fucking military drill sergeant. Those dudes are always super straight, right? But they're gay on the low. They're not straight. Military dudes are all gay. Yeah, military.

I got it confused. dudes are all gay yeah military i got it confused they're all gay i was thinking they're all straight military dudes if you're in the military it's like our zero blog 30 podcast which is really just a subsidiary of out and about those dudes are all just so gay like it's not I don't blame them like they are out they're out at sea I understand why they choose to be gay yeah they're out at sea for years and then they gotta be and there's no they gotta switch shit up a little bit or there's like so few broads that it like behooves you to be gay

it's dope if you're out in out in the high seas sucking dick yeah I mean you gotta get your dick sucked and you gotta suck some dick sometimes. It doesn't matter who it's coming from as long as it's getting done. Yeah, that's...

I know the drill sergeants are probably on that shit. They're just like... Why wouldn't they be? Those are the drills. They just have you... Drop down at 69, son! After Hell Week, something's gotta ease the tension.

I need you sucking this dick's ass, boy. Get over here and suck on this cock. It's crazy because the military could do that and then just no one would ever get in trouble for it. Yeah. The military's fucked. Should we talk conflict in the Middle East? Yeah. We already talked about that a bit last episode.

We talked about it from one side, but I think that it's best that we present both sides yeah probably we are bombing the fuck out of the middle east with drones to cover up our own latent homosexuality maybe they won't realize we're gay if we just bomb some of these kids they won't know just bomb some of these kids. They won't know. Just bomb some more kids. Just got caught giving a handjob to my Sergeant Major. Let's kill some kids. Let's blow up this village.

Yeah, it's the only way. And I completely get it. You have to do something that's bigger than... Yeah, something has to get done. Yeah, honestly. Either get get or you get it. You have to do something that's bigger than... Yeah, something has to get done. Yeah, honestly. Either get get or you get got. That's why these NFL players are ruining it by coming out. It's just going to make it so normal that everyone will be okay with the fact that the military is gay

and they'll start focusing on the fucking innocence that they're killing. You know what I mean? It's going to fuck the game up. The ESPN headline that was like, or I think KFC talked about this on the rundown, but he was like, the headline that's like, who was the guy that came out? Carl Nassib.

Carl Nassib? Nassib. Nassib? Carl Nassib is the first ever gay NFL player. What did they say? Active, active gay? Actively gay? Is the only, or yeah, something. They made it seem like it was. Like gay is the only or yeah something they made it seem

like it was like he's the only ever gay nfl player they made it seem like he was actively gay like there's other dudes who are gay but they just like haven't activated their gayness like they have that like they just have to flip the switch and like turn it on and start start being gay to get a couple more uh tackles or something. I don't know. At a certain point, at a certain amount of yards when you just achieve gayness.

It's a fact. Yeah, it's like a player card that you can unlock. Rush for 2,000 yards and unlock gay. It is a watershed moment. There's no gay podcasters is the problem. There's a ton of gay podcasters. What? Are you serious?

Pat from Barstool. That's true. That's true. He's gay. He was on Talking Today. Was he really? Yes. Big time, bro.

You don't listen? No. Sounds like you're part of the problem. But I did see that the Roanan episode was pulling some serious numbers i mean from a rap battler to class clown you're a class this episode of token roan describes the adventure of rap battling to a podcast with lil sacks so what is a rap battle? I'm getting pretty good at explaining what it is.

Are you going to get back into the game at all? I would like to, but it's like, who should I rap battle? You know what I mean? Are you just that big in the scene? Like you're too good to rap battle any of those small guys? Not really, but it's like, I just want to have something to say to someone. Like this last dude that I battled, I knew so much about him.

Yeah, I watched that. I knew all the specifics about his life. I knew the things he had done wrong. I had followed his trajectory. People wanted it to happen for a long time. Yeah. So it's like I just want there to be something to write about. I don't want to just be making up random pop culture reference lines or whatever.

Maybe I should do that. I want to do more compliment battle stuff. I want to do something about the nicest rapper and just go around the world and do compliment battles against nice ass fucking rappers. You know what was a fucking good ass

rap battle? You against Beck. What? You against Noah Beck. Noah Beck? Oh yeah. what was a fucking good ass rap battle you against beck what you against noah beck noah beck oh yeah i remember that i do not know who noah beck i tagged you in that and you didn't even look at it and i because i didn't see it yeah right you think that i would right right right you think that i would throw a fucking wayward shot at the king of New York. What was the line? Noah Beck. Oh, yeah, Noah Beck. More like Noah Neck. I hate you, Noah Beck.

And he saw that too, right? It was a bar. He saw it, right? No, I don't think he saw that. I'm pretty sure he did. Did he? All the Sway Boys are fucking in the sass fucking universe.

Yeah, they do love me. Those are my fucking boys. That's not what you said last episode. You said, I fucking hate those kids. Speaking of which michael gruen wants to come on the pod you saw that owen grewy because my because my assistant tagged him in a tweet and said funniest part of the episode is when you guys said that michael at michael gruen had to fuck josh richards to be his manager and it turns out out that Dave... And then he was like, yo, let me on the fucking pod, bro.

That's not fucking true. So come on. I didn't fuck anyone, dude. I don't think he said it wasn't true. I think that he just wanted to set the story straight. So there's a... There's actually a lot...

He did not deny it anyway. Well, Hollywood's all fuck for play. Yeah, there's a very, very high chance that he did actually fuck Josh Richards to be his manager. No, I thought that Dave fucked Gruen to have Josh on the pod. Oh, yeah. Was that what it was?

I think that both could have happened. I think it was a three. Like, everyone was getting sucked in. If you want to make something happen with Sway House or with Barstool, you got to fuck Gruen. Yeah. That's what it was. You gotta pay the troll. You gotta pay this.

You gotta pay the troll toll to get in this boy's hole. Right. Exactly. And the troll toll is. Is Gruen. Is fucking Gruen. Yeah. He'll set up like.

Fuck Josh. You have to fuck Gruen first. So Gruen can see if that's like. If that dick's good for Josh. If it's up to the standards. If it's. Yeah. If it's good enough.

Like yo. That dick's not up. That's not quality dick. And Josh only accepts quality. He'll just send you back. It's like an the standards. If it's good enough. Like, yo, that dick's not up. That's not quality dick. And Josh only accepts quality. He'll just send you back. It's like an American Idol judge who will be like, just come back next season. Just work on it all year. Just get your shit straight.

And then you'll be good. Yeah, exactly. Shave those pubes a little bit. I mean, just take care of yourself. Respect yourself a little bit. You think you can just come in here and fuck Josh? you're a cub right now we need a lion we need a lioness we need someone who's and i think that that's probably what he wanted to clarify gruen so we need to get him on i tried to be in the sway house a while ago and they didn't let me in they said i need to lose weight

they wanted me to take my shirt off in the interview and I was like, I can't. And they were like, just take your fucking shirt off, dude. And I was like, I really don't want to. It was a body ache? I started tearing up. I really don't want to! And they were like, take it off! And in retrospect, it was

like you could just leave, but you just... And that was like Bryce and Griffin. T.O.? Was T.O. there? No, T.O. like you just. And that was like Bryce and that was like Bryce and Griffin. T.O.? Was T.O. there? No, T.O. wasn't there. And then Noah's more of like the nice guy. He came over to me after and he was like, dude, like he's like, those guys don't know what they're talking about.

Like, you're great. Like, you've got the moves. We just need you to like. And he like tussled your hair, right? He like rubbed the top of your head. He's like, we need you. We just need you to get down to like a healthy hundred pounds. Just get down to a nice.

Because all those dudes are. All those dudes are between like 90 and 110. Yeah. He's like, a nice, scary 100. All those dudes are between 90 and 110. Yeah, he's like, what are you? 170? He's like, dude, just lose 70 pounds. It's not that hard. Because your only other option if you're trying to get in is you lose the weight or you brawl with

Bryce. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You fight Bryce in the driveway. And you have to pay 10 mil just to fight Bryce, which is crazy. But it's worth it in the long run if you get in, if you beat Bryce's ass. But you're not going to beat him. That's why he's 40-0. He's a real street fighter and he's been in 40 fights. He just doesn't want anyone to get

into the house. No. And I think, well, I just think that Gruen... I mean, you got denied from the house too, didn't you? By Gruen. And that's why we need to have his ass out here. It's all happening. It's all happening very quickly have his ass out here. Like, we need to... It's all happening. It's all happening very quickly. It's manifesting.

My dad's supply has been out for less than a week, and we've already got Gruen on. And do you see who else was in the cinematic universe of Son of a Boy Dad? Caleb? Well, I didn't even... I wasn't even going to say that, but Caleb, too. Caleb's going to be back this week.

Maybe we sprinkle a little Caleb in. Yeah, we're going to sprinkle a little Caleb in. Sprinkle some Caleb in. Maybe he can tell you... He could talk to you about the pitfalls of doing content with me. Yeah. Because there's a lot of them. Let's just say...

I work too hard. I expect too much from those around me. I give and give and give. Haven't I given enough to this company no what were you gonna say who who who else was in the v who's v oh gary v yeah i did see that that was crazy yeah gary v is uh like he'll definitely come on yeah we need him on does he follow you i don't know but he's he's trying to fuck yeah he is trying to fuck there was a picture of a kid and i said that this is what would happen if i fucked gary v and yesterday he responded with uh

he agrees with that sentiment and he's also down if i'm down to fuck that is classic v but he's that we need to have gruen on first so gary v can fuck gruen to get to me yeah that is true. I do feel like Gruen and Gary Vee could be interesting. But then at that point, we're just like a business podcast. There's going to be people ranting about how you have to take a cold shower every morning.

What about an episode about just how to make a billion dollars with Gary Vee and Michael Gruen? That would be awesome. Two billionaires. They don't have a billion dollars, but I count them as billionaires. Yeah. Gruen's That would be awesome. Two billionaires. Yeah. They don't have a billion dollars, but they're both like, I count them as billionaires. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Is Gruen pretty rich, right? Oh, yeah. He definitely has at least like $100,000. No, that guy must be rich as fuck. All the brand deals that he's setting up. He definitely has some apps in beta right now. Oh, that's what they love. They're always like, we're not TikTokers.

We're fucking entrepreneurs, dude entrepreneur entrepreneur entrepreneurs entrepreneurs and uh he they all uh it seems like everything that they launch fails horribly like any energy was that one of their new drinks no one has ever drank that ever but uh i think that the people just want an energy drink like my friends who were in pyramid schemes in high school, they were just selling energy drinks. I just don't get like just do like they're already rich as fuck. Like just keep doing your shirtless little videos like you're going to be a millionaire until you're dead no matter what. Like you don't have to be like, oh, you know, we this has always been a lifelong dream of mine to be famous. Now it's do energy drinks because that was also like no one's ever been sitting in the room be like dude i need to start an energy drink

but the writing is on the wall for some of these people like i i've i was uh talking to some someone this past weekend uh pat shut up pat just doing a little flick of the tongue between the fingers eating pussy motion classic even more ironic as eating ass. Yeah, eating ass probably. He was eating ass. But I found out this past weekend that mathematicians, there's a sweet spot for prodigious mathematicians that you have to be young because the synapse is in your brain closed when you're able to do experimental math that actually thinks outside the box. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's definitely the same for these fucking tiktokers like you have to be a sweet spot in age to have the right to have the right body composition to be like right in that 105 pound range to be able to hit the all like the dances and have like the

bangs in the right way like they the writing is on the wall for these motherfuckers and that's why they're trying to at least work on becoming moguls in the background because they can't be mathematicians forever. You think, though? You think that they're – like, I mean, maybe some of them are old, but Josh is like 19, right? Not anymore. Yeah. I think he's not 29? No, I think he just turned 19 recently.

Oh, for real? There's no way that Josh is like – it's definitely Gruen. Like, there's no way that they're like josh and bryce are like dude we should totally start an energy drink together it's definitely gruen's like i'm fat and uh well no that has nothing to do with it gruen you're not fat you're not fat gruen's a slim guy it's definitely more like i it's glandular you piece of shit it's definitely more like he is a money hungry guy and you call him hungry because that's not funny either it's glandular he probably eats less than

you probably if he's on that fucking bryce hall diet yeah yuck it up they eat their meals together okay and he he he smokes cigarettes which are an appetite suppressant learn one thing about gruen one time for me that's literally all that i asked all right that's my bad that's my bad i got off track there i interrupted you though as you were i don't even remember what i was gonna say i just started dripping sweat yeah because you're probably we're chopping that we're chopping that part no way what we don't that's that's the ethos of the show we're chopping that we're chopping that part no way what we don't that's that's the ethos of the show where we're not chopping anything we're gonna throw a nice over that no one will know grew it is we can say anything about him um yesterday

last night i was on reddit for like two hours just trying to write funny troll posts i saw the one you wrote the cigarettes one it was funny you read the two hours just trying to write funny troll posts. I saw the one you wrote. The cigarettes one? It was funny. You read the beer one? That one was really funny. That one was way better. The beer. It was beer.

I thought you wrote about beer in like a cigarettes group or something like that. I don't fucking know. No, I read one of your posts. I wrote a cigarettes one about cigarettes. No, he doesn't have to read it. It's way too long. No, I'll read it. You want me to read it out loud?

Sure, yeah. The entire thing? For sure. Stop me when you get bored. You're not going to get bored. It's really fucking good. I'm addicted to beer. Wait, keep in mind, this is in Reddit r slash beer.

Were you trolling last night, bro? I was trolling and I had fun doing it, too. Shut up, you dog. You're probably pissing people off for real. No, that one got taken down within seconds. People take their Reddit communities very seriously. Reddit might be the most serious

social media. People are dead serious about their Reddit. They don't let bullshit in on their Reddit. I think it's safe to say that it's been about a year since I became a beeraholic. I'm someone who's addicted to beer.

This is the first time I've ever told any about it, so here it goes. I'm 20 years old and I'm a full-on beeraholic, which is hard to believe considering I've never actually had a single sip of beer. But I am. I know I am. I grew up in a very religious, very follow-the-rules type home, and for those reasons, I never got around to the whole

underage drinking thing. You see, my addiction has always been strictly psychological. Bud Light has always been my favorite beer. I think it has something to do with the flashy blue cans. Those cans aren't flashy as fuck, bro. You see a Bud Light can and

you just want it. I find them quite intriguing. I love them. I'm fascinated by them. I'm addicted to them. However, I've never actually had a sip of them. I'd say around 30 to 40% of my day is spent staring directly at the 12-pack of flashy Bud Light cans that rest on my desk completely untouched. When I'm not looking at them, I'm thinking about them.

I constantly fantasize about the taste and what I imagine it must be like to take a gulp out of one of those beautiful cans. Is it fruity? Is it salty? What's the texture like? Thick? Watery? Are just a few of the questions I ask myself. But to be completely honest, I have absolutely no idea.

I honestly think that's what keeps me coming back for more. The curiosity. The curiosity is a big factor in what fuels my addiction. Now you might be asking, why are you telling us about this? It doesn't sound like you're an actual addict. It just sounds like you have some sort of weird obsession. Well, the truth is, although it's not your typical alcohol addiction, it's still fully ruining my life.

Something to consider. Something that I constantly think about every day is the day that I will enjoy my first beer. It will be April 5th, 2022. That's the date I turn 21. I'm rooted for you to get this first beer out. In my head, I imagine I will go to the bar with the guys. We'll all order some ice cold Bud Lights.

However, my biggest fear is the magical scenario. In this magical scenario is that I won't have any guys to go with. I quite literally have zero friends. All the friends I have in the past have completely abandoned me. Anytime I'm close to making a new friend, I believe they're insane. Instantly turned off when I asked them to come over and look at my beer collection. Most likely because they have a smaller collection than I do. As a 20-year-old guy, things can be very competitive.

When a friend comes over and we look at my beer collection for even just a quick 45 minutes, they instantly want to leave. Why? Because they don't have what I am. What I have. What I have. They're jealous. I have a lot of beers and I'm constantly craving more.

I really am at a loss for words because I don't know what to do. Please give up. Do I give up beer, cold turkey, or do I say, fuck friends and continue to watch my life go down the drain as a beeraholic? Please let me know what you think. What fucking made you do that?

I have no idea. What made you just want to fuck with beer people? Do you know anybody who's seriously into beer? Yeah. Because they're hilarious. People who are like... I feel like it's like an older guy move, like a craft beer guy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like trying all different types of beer guy with like a beard and like uh like a black shirt on that's too small and like a jeff cap or whatever like a true beer snob yeah that's definitely what that group is for true beer snobs no it is that's like what it is it's all people like brew their own beer and shit like that and they definitely love like and i posted that and the first comment was like is this satire and then just got taken down because it's not satire no because it's fucking real it's dead fucking serious i thought i i don't know why they like i don't know what it didn't break any of the

rules like i guess it was like a shit post so like you don't make fun of beer not on this page i thought it was great there was definitely people who were furious about it totally there's i i know people who run like i have a friend's older brother who runs an instagram account where he just takes pictures of labels of beer oh yeah yeah it's just labels of beer that's like a very like 2014 instagram type thing you like love bacon. Yeah. And taking pictures of bacon every day. Epic bacon time. Yeah. Epic bacon and beer meal.

Those guys are fucking sick. Like you could do that with anything. Like it could just be like cameras of the day and then just post a different camera every day and that account would have like a million followers.

We are actually super pussy for not having a million followers on any account because there's so many people that have millions of followers on tons of accounts. We are like we're we're bad at this yeah i mean it'll come eventually one day the millie the millie the richard i'm not too worried about it uh i don't i just need alex cooper to name drop us on her on her podcast which she

should after he gave her that beautiful departure speech that sign off that send off I know doesn't get much better than that I know I heard she cried I heard she cried too she actually sent it she sent me a selfie crying and she was like mood AF she was like mood AF after listening to last episode of son of a boy dad

on Snapchat no yeah it was on Snapchat actually that's love yeah i would screenshot it but you'd be pissed i know i know i didn't want to expose her like that she would get so fucking mad we were ahead of her in the comedy rankings all oh yeah and then oh yeah and then we just bumped her back up so she's double indebted to us that we just slipped down to 10 and i think she was salty about that definitely she was salty about that yeah because i hit her up and i was like did you see the uh i was trying to just kind of be like buddy buddy i was like

you see the rankings lol just iced red no way she left you on red yeah she's a bitch like that but that's why i love her like don't you like sometimes you like wish people would be more of a bitch and then like that's why i'm thankful that father coop is just like actually the bitch to us that like you want her to be totally totally it's like when you meet a hero you want them to be the person that you like always thought they were yeah and she is like when i or that's like when i met pooth it's like you wanted him to be a pussy hound oh yeah you want and he was like you wanted him to be a pussy hound. Oh, yeah. You want Charlie Puth to be a pussy hound. Do you, though? Definitely.

Yeah, I guess. If we get to 25,000 followers on Twitter next week, we both have to shave a Charlie Puth scar into our eyebrows. Yeah, I would do that. Just a straight up and down scar. Yeah, I would do that. For Puth? For down scar. Yeah, I would do that. For poof? For poof? Oh, you might just have to do it. It definitely doesn't have anything to do

with the 25K. It only has to do with the poof. Just getting poofy. Yeah. Let's have poof on. If we're able to just speak things into existence, let's get poof on. We've already got a lot of big guests lined up. We've got poof, Sheehan in swift isn't

confirmed yet is she no but we're talking to her her publicist but it's just like with her new music releases it's tough with her because she's about to be touring and everything like that she's hard to get in touch with harlow harlow harlow Harlow I fucking love that guy Salute Salute Salute to you Harlow Shout out bro Friend of the pod

What's poppin' Super good friend of the pod Super good friend Leroy Leroy's Might come on He said Leroy

Look there you go Can't like who I fit in for what time is it 530 they'll all be on all the gentlemen will be on

are you saying that we should call it should we yeah should we wrap it up we'll wrap it up chicken fry might come on she said let us know what

what pod crossovers you want because we'll we'll also get some crossovers going in here. I'm talking a yak crossover, perhaps. Yeah, a yak crossover would be awesome. We were thinking about doing Big Cat, so I do want to try that out. Big Cat?

So maybe we could even have Big Cat on, on his own, without the rest of the yak? Without those other stragglers. Straight cats? Yeah, no, we could do that. I think having KB and and nikon will be fun too because i mean those guys are just fucking great dude they fucking are i mean we might have caleb on yes as he makes his return to the press day have you ever talked to caleb yeah one-on-one yeah we did the beer games together but did you

talk to him did you have like a one-on-one convo with we did the beer games together. But did you talk to him? Did you have like a one-on-one convo with him? Bro, you're talking about my coach right now. Did he ever like bless you with any knowledge about the content game? I don't think so, no. Try to get a video to 20 milli. Talk to Caleb, brother. Yeah.

He'll get you to 20 milli real fast. All right. 20 milli on the tube. Well, maybe we'll have him on. Have him bless us with some info. On how to get to 20 million? Yeah. The road to 20 million?

Yeah. They're never going to give us 20 million. No. Unless Caleb unlocks some shit. Let's gaslight all of our subs into thinking that we won't get to 20 million. You guys will never give us 20 million. We don't deserve it. We're not funny enough for you guys.

You guys are the best, but we just wish we could live up to your super high expectations. I know you guys want us to get 20 million, but we never will. We just won't. But thank you for 15K. Yeah. Or thank you for 14.5K. No, we're at 15. We're at 15? Yeah.

Thank you for 15. Oh, dude, come on. You didn't have those up when me and Omer were spraying champagne all over our apartment when we hit it? You were? What? Yeah, we had 15K balloons. 15! fucking you didn't have those up when it went me and Omer spraying champagne all over our apartment when we hit it you were what yeah we had 15k balloons 15 the sky's the fucking limit this is just the beginning

you soaked up the floor and we're just sliding back and forth on the floor just sliding all the way down the hallway it was like wolf of wall street 15k in six fucking days oh 15 15k fuck yes bro we need we need compilations like we need a fucking thunderous compilation yeah cuts music music Like, new pod alert. I want like a TikTok dancer right over here just dancing the whole time.

Just doing us a little dance. Yes, bro. Yes. Someone serving. Someone serving. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, we need someone serving.

Have you noticed that this summer in New York? People are just serving. I know. Anywhere you go. Everybody has serious main character energy. Yes, dude. people are serving yeah i want just a bunch of like sports illustrated swim saw swimsuit swimsuit swimsuit models filled in this room yes all of them serving looks i need them serving looks main character energy i want no parts but maybe i do maybe i do want parts i want no parts, but maybe I do. Maybe I do want parts.

I want all parts. I'm glad we're on the same wavelength. Yes. Oh, my God. Can we serve this summer? Let's serve. It's going to be a fucking vibe in New York this summer. People are walking around serving everywhere. Showing a little hip, showing a little shoulder.

Speaking of white boy summer, that really died out quick. I know. Should we try and get Hayze on i heard he's gonna be in the office i heard he clocks him he charges about 10k every 10 minutes yeah he'd run us up about 60k for one for one appearance because we're long-winded we would want him on oh yeah we'd want him on for like two or three hours too but we want to pick his brain yeah oh get to the bottom of it what makes you tick yeah what it makes you what's your makeup like what's it like just being with tom and rita like at dinner just eating brussies so

forrest gump do you hate it or do you love it is life actually like chocolate or was that just like a line in the movie that's just like funny because it is funny but was tom hanks actually that fast did his mom in the movie have AIDS and everything have you seen Gump of course of course the classic put me onto a movie bro give me some homework I've had so many people recommending books

this past week listeners of this pod so many of the oh yeah I got a I had some kid asking me if I'd ever seen catch or ever watched or ever read catcher in the rye like a hundred times. And have you? Like a really long time ago. And I probably barely read it.

Fucking skimmed that shit. Fucking skimmed it. Fuck. Read the Cliff Notes. Spark Notes. Shit was decent. Cliffies were not bad. The Sparkies. From the Sparkies.. Cliffies were not bad. The Sparkies. Got the gist from the Sparkies.

The Sparkies were not bad. I used to read shakes on the Sparkies. But we need to name our people. You want to get like a little... Like the monster Swifties. The fan club. Type of shit. Let's call them the Sons of Sam.

club type uh type of shit let's call it let's call them the sons of sam is that what the uh soccer group is the sons of sam is like a cult but isn't it uh isn't that i thought that the sons of sam were also like what the u.s soccer fans call themselves oh is it oh no you're right i think i think you are right about that but the son of sam is a killer too yeah no no it's a cult fuck oh so you oh so you haven't seen the documentary clearly i mean i've watched zodiac the movie gyllenhaal fincher was us that movie was us have you seen prisoners with gyllenhaal akira no i haven't seen it that is good a good movie. Okay. Watch that. That's my homework? Yeah. Who's your... Okay, okay.

Yeah, I like that. That's my homework. Yeah. And yours is 48 Laws of Power. All right. I'll watch it. No, no. It's a book.

Oh. Well, yours sounds a little more enjoyable than mine. All right, but I didn't ask for something enjoyable. I don't want for something enjoyable. I don't want to read fucking 48 laws of power. It's like a prison book. It's a book you read in prison. All right, yours, I changed yours.

Yours is now the art of the deal. I've read that. Give me something new. Of course, you have your businessman. I'm a true businessman. Did you see that tweet that's going viral of a guy, someone walking in there like, this is my little brother's bedroom and it's a uh trump 2024 oh yeah that was hilarious and then the pov as i enter my 16 year old stepbrother's room trump 2024 take america back jesus is king flag a flag that says. Jesus is king, flag.

A flag that says Jesus is king. Saturdays are for the boys, flag. And I have a dream, Martin Luther King poster. Someone was like really sending me mixed signals here. Everyone keeps on being like. How many likes does that have? Huh? How many likes does that have?

18K. Oh, nice. Because I liked it when I was like 200. Really? We call it the sass bump. Yeah. I mean, once people say liked by, people see liked by Lil Sass. They're like, oh, this is a banger. But everyone keeps on being like, I would need to sit my Lil Bro down if this is what

he had in his room. Lil Bro, MLK? Come on, Lil Bro. If you're that, if you're six, like when you're like in high school, your political opinions could not be like worse. Like I remember just being like, well, financially, I'm a conservative, but socially, I will live. You just had no one has any idea what that means. Yeah, it just sounds no idea what I don't want them to be spending my parents tax money on anything.

Well, I don't believe with Biden's tax plans at all. It's like you're 13. You're like wearing a suit in a briefcase whatever your whatever either one of your friends says or what your parents say yeah people don't people do not know no but uh it is also hilarious that martin luther king is sprinkled in there did you ever used to like google martin luther king and like the first thing like i don't know how they mastered the seo of this, but the first thing that came up was a webpage about how awful of a dude Martin Luther King was. No, I don't remember that at all.

He cheated on his wife, and here's a recording of him cheating, and all the bad shit that someone had a serious vendetta against Martin Luther King. Well, there was probably someone that was a piece of shit. Who? Martin Luther King was? No, whoever made it. No. No, bro. Martin Luther King's not a there was probably someone that was like a piece of shit. Who? Martin Luther King was? No, whoever made it. No. No, bro. Martin Luther King's not a fucking piece of shit, dude. He's a fucking good guy.

It's just the fact that they worked hard enough to make it go to the top of the algorithm is just incredible work by whoever they are because it's kind of got me believing that MLK is a piece of shit, bro. I'm going to need to hear some more evidence because the first website I went to... Dude, he was the fucking goat.

He had a fucking dream, dude. We also need merch and that kind of sounds like a fucking merch. MLK was the goat. MLK equals goat. Just like an emoji of a goat. Like a really nice drawing of him. Or like blankets.

Like a blanket that said MLK was the goat would be fucking fire. Or like a coat. MLK was the coat. Coolest of all time but it's actually on a coat on like a varsity that would be some like that would be some like balenciaga shit and then it would sell for like eighteen thousand dollars a piece well i can't we i mean we need to start getting into exclusive drops for the pod where it's like there's 200 of these and they sell

out the episode 200 of the episode i mean i was thinking of merch but like episodes wouldn't be a bad idea we're trying to juice you guys for as much money as we can because it's not going to go to us but oh it's all the fuck we're gonna find a way to get it to us the boy the patreon oh yeah all of them don't tell anyone don't tell any of the higher-ups about that that thing is up and running keep that between us. And we are pulling in money. We are yanking in money. It's fucking unreal.

We're going to catch after this. Going to get some steaks and bottle service. Yeah, we're going to catch steak, obviously. Sorry, Bouncer, I'm not 21, but I am rich as fuck. Does that change anything? Do these Patreon metrics do anything for your liking, sir? Think about that. Extrapolate that. If that's in the in the first month imagine what we're gonna do over a year okay now can we get a primo table here now can we woof down the bronzino but yeah mlk equals the goat uh limited edition shirts

should be on sale should be on sale soon yeah definitely so They'll be out by the time you're listening to this. They probably already will if it's sold out, honestly. And if you do graphic design, definitely submit your MLK equals the GOAT designs and whatever the best one is. We'll have our own shirts, but we'll just know

that you sent in a good one. And shout out MLK. Shout out MLK. Happy belated Juneteenth as well. Happy belated Juneteenth. Cheers. Cheers. All right. Thanks for listening.