Son of a Boy Dad - Son of a Boy Dad: Ep. 71 - The Evolution of Titties (ft. Joey Camasta)

Episode Date: July 26, 2022

Son of a Boy Dad: Ep. 71 - The Evolution of Titties (ft. Joey Camasta) -- The boys are back in the radio room to discuss their weekends, Andrew Tate, murder bloggers, stand-up, pup punk, the Most Dangerous Gameshow, Marilyn Monroe stinking to high heavens, & the evolution of titties, as well as a pop-in/Jersey Shore recap from Out and About's Joey Camasta -- Enjoy!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to Son of a Boy Dad Podcast. Today it is Monday. It is July 25th, and we are here at Barstool HQ3. Not HQ2, not HQ1, but HQ3.

And I am here with my co-host, Adam Ferone. Adam, take it away. We're back to our roots. Son of a boy dad, you might remember our first couple episodes we recorded in this fucking room that we're in right now with the big tvs behind us but then for an unbeknownst reason to any of us we went into a worse room with worse tvs behind us worse sounding mics less acoustics because we're shy and this room has big glass walls and we didn't want people to see the things we were joking about with our words and so uh we we recessed into a different studio but now we're back trying to

recapture that sweet ass magic yep we are back and take it away a little better than ever take it the fuck away and we're rebranding as a fucking sexist podcast yep now we're fucking sexist podcast. Yep. Now we're fucking sexist. Anything you want to talk about? Yeah. How fucking women, women, if I had a fucking woman, she wouldn't be allowed to fucking talk to other dudes,

but I'd be allowed to talk to anybody I wanted to. If I had a woman, preach. Who is that guy? Let's take a call. Yeah. We're going to take a call from, uh, Andrew Tate on the line

646-291-2437 call on in andrew tate hey how's it going guys i actually never got pussy in my life women are meant to be conquered pure form of woman is meant to be conquered by i i made a joke about andrew tate on twitter today and i got a reply and the dude was like are meant to be conquered. Pure form of woman is meant to be conquered. I made a joke about Andrew Tate on Twitter today and I got a reply and the dude was like, yeah, dude, when was the last time

you bought a Bugatti? Is that what he has? I guess he's like a buys Bugattis. I don't know. I just saw a video of him just beating the fuck out of some girl.

Like a hooker. Is that real? Yeah, just beating the fuck out of her. Oh, that's not funny then. I thought you were making a joke. I'm being dead serious. Are you serious? Got like a hooker. Is that real? Yeah, just beating the fuck out of her. Oh, that's not funny then. I thought you were making a joke. Being dead serious. Are you serious?

Where to God? So why is he, wait, what? And the Nelk boys saw that and they're like, bro, we're flying to Croatia right now. We got to get Tate on the pod. Sass was, you were in your old bag on Twitter this week. I don't know why, but I felt like you were in your, like finding some celebrities to make fun of. Oh yeah, I'm back on Twitter. I'm trying to get back because I realized it's stupid of me to not to stop tweeting. It's stupid as fuck.

Why would I stop doing the one thing that made me anything? Bingo. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. Sometimes it just gets exhausting, but I mean. Yeah, it's tough to just be like milk boys and like three crying laughing emojis oh yeah but I figured

I gotta get back to it so no that's your fucking bag and that's what I enjoy the most about your Twitter presence so if you kept on doing that it would make me very happy just as like a consumer not as someone who's pushing you to drive it's also fun like if you're having fun on Twitter it's like a blast.

What types of things were making it not fun for you? I think just stupid-ass people are getting fucking loud opinions again, and it's, like, fun to make fun of. That's when you got to get back, and you got to set them straight. Exactly. On the law. Because people are like, oh, Andrew Tate, like, are women my possessions? Yeah, I mean, dude, the only people that follow that guy have to be, like, 12-year-olds, though.

Yeah. Like, the only people that are actually, like, into that, like, money shit are, like, kids that got CTE in high school football. Or, I mean, it's true. It's true. Yeah. Like, their brains don't function, so they have to follow like big flashy Instagram accounts that are like the bank thing who are like, yes, I'm, I'm fucking motivated. They're just like, I'm going to drive a Lamborghini one day.

But like, they don't, they don't have any, they don't have a job. They don't know, have no source of income. They're camp counselors. They're just so certain that they're going to drive a Lamborghini. I know. That's like all that matters to them in life. And then there's like 12 year olds who it makes more sense because they're like, okay, Lamborghinis are sick. I'm going to drive a Lamborghini. That's like all that matters to them in life. And then there's like 12 year olds who it makes more sense because they're like, okay, Lamborghinis are sick. I'm going to drive a Lamborghini. Bass ass dude. Sass is spitting absolute fucking facts right now. And I dig it,

but it is, uh, or, or people just love to strive for some shit. Like people are people that's like the lifestyle. It's not even like getting the things isn't the lifestyle. It's just like wanting things and convincing yourself that you're't the lifestyle it's just like wanting things and convincing yourself that you're gonna get them by just like busting your ass or like just like waking up and like fucking doing like a bunch of pull-ups or some shit like yeah it's like then you're gonna be rich yeah it is crazy how how much the like the motivational money guys and the fitness motivation guys like combine into one when it's, like, it's not, like, you can be rich and be, like, fat as fuck. People think, like, you have to have shredded abs to be, like, rich.

And a lot of the most jackedest dudes at the gym are poor as fuck. Yeah. Because they spend fucking three hours at the gym with the dudes. They spend all their money on supplements. Yeah. Supplements are expensive as fuck. Yeah, dude, it is crazy. It's an absolute racket. We need to get

a branded supplement the way that Spittin' Chicklets is getting their own fucking beers, vodkas, liquors. We need to start getting some suppies at GNC. It's about time that hockey deserves a new beer. What is their slogan that they're using? Is that what they're saying?

Something like that, right? Hockey deserves a new beer. Really? I feel like it's a partnership with Labatt, right? isn't that what they're saying something like that right hockey does no what is it like hockey deserves a new beer really i feel like well there is it's a partnership with labatt right yeah yeah i feel like labatt was automatically like the hockey beer because it's canadian yeah labatt's great yeah it's fucking delicious i love a labatt yeah i love a labatt blue labatt blue light i like a labatt blue light and or now the not a big deal or whatever the fuck it's called. Yeah, not a big deal. Salute to those dudes, dude. They've been fucking just grinding hard of just being likable.

It feels like they've been grinding even harder recently. You think so? I think. Do you think that they... I've seen Biz everywhere. He's everywhere always. Yeah. How do you think that he keeps a good attitude?

Do you think any of his work feels like work to him? You think it's a lot of drugs? He's got to be on copious amount of drugs. Are you talking about like weed drugs or like pharmaceuticals? Anything that could keep his mind sharp. I don't think it's pharmaceuticals though. He runs like 24-7. He's always doing something.

I know, but I feel like he has a lot of good producers and stuff where he can just kind of be on set and just kind of be funny. But I think there's also a calculatedness to Biz that he doesn't want you to see. Like somebody who makes shit come easy, but it's because of all the work that they put in behind the scenes. Yeah, definitely. Kind of like your stand-up. No, don't say that. You act like you don't give a fuck, but really you're fucking crying at night because you only have three spots at the stand over the next three weeks.

I give the most fucks about, I care about that a lot. Well, you care about that a lot, but most of all you care about Barstool and Son of a Boy Dad. I do. I care about the Yak and Son of a Boy Dad a lot. A ton. Even a little bit more than stand up. Yeah.

I know that about you, brother. I know that about you. No, but like everyone thinks like oh first of all the francis episode it's like like 90 000 views on youtube is it yeah and we got to get francis back on i know that same story again i would have had him on months ago if i knew it was going to do that i was trying to tell you i said the first shane gillis episode should be him and uh francis that i don't think even the shame one got like around that i think it might have gotten less holy fuck well because it, because it's juicy.

I think that's why we just got to lean on people who are... Juicy. Yeah, or have Barstool backstories and stuff like that. And we don't want to become like that show. For the numbies? Yeah, true. Maybe we just should. Who gives a fuck?

Who fucking literally gives a fuck, dude? For the fucking numbies? Because the next day on Dave's podcast... In that 86, I was like, hmm. I saw it this morning. Got me fired up. What? 86,000 views.

Was that what it said? On YouTube. I didn't know. Did I say 90 before? Yeah. It might be at 90 now. Probably. It's probably at 100 now.

Who gives a fuck? Me. I don't. On the next, on the Dave Portnoy show, though, he, dude, I just got distracted, dude. I just bought these new socks, dude. They were like fucking $16 for one pair of socks. They're coming apart at the same time. I could fucking ripcord this like a lawnmower

and they'd go down to a single thread, dude. What the fuck is this? Yeah, that's tough. Gotta get yourself some Nikes, dude. This is bullshit. I had enough Nikes, though. I was trying to fucking pivot. Dude, Nike does some bullshit with their socks where they change up every, like, every package of socks has, like, a little bit different of ribbing. So you can't, like, put together, like, the Nike socks you got, like, two weeks ago with

the Nike socks you got this week. Now you can't. It's fucking genius bullshit that Nike's pulling. Yeah, it's also, like, why is it standard for us to buy, like, one pair of socks for, like, 15 bucks? Socks should be, like, free. Socks are skyrocketing. Yeah of socks for like 15 bucks socks should be like free socks are skyrocketing yeah it's like napkins they should be free if i was a communist bernie sanders ass president i'd be giving away socks as my first thing yeah i just did a sock genocide i just did a purge of socks in my fucking top drawer amount of socks for that

you don't i don't have we don't have drawers in our apartment. Space. You just throw everything somewhere. Where do you put your socks? Just shove it all into one corner. I feel like socks are the thing that's- You have to dig it up and try and figure out what you're going to wear that day. Yeah, just going through old socks. Socks, dude. Why do you say we talking about your bedroom?

Dude, I hate my bedroom. Well, actually, that's not true. I love our apartment, and it's the only apartment I've lived in that I haven't despised. But I need a dresser and it's just I don't have room for one. My room is so small. What about the people who... Owen's room is double the size of mine. Yeah, well, he works places hard. Owen's room is small.

He'd fucking bust his ass. Boog's room, on the other hand, I mean, it's not even livable how small it is. He has one but it's his fault. He got a fucking king-sized bed in like the smallest apartment in New York. He just made it. The apartment is his room is just a bed.

Wall to wall bed. Dude, he has like a one foot space to get to his bed. And then that's his room. That's kind of sweet. But then you just wind up having everything on your bed. Yeah, that's like what my room is, too. You just put the shit on your bed and then move it over to sleep on it. Yeah, that's kind of sweet sweet though. Just eating in bed.

Yeah. Do you guys eat in bed? Yeah, every night. I feel like my room has gotten smaller though since I got my AC and it's pissing me off. I really want to get rid of it. Elaborate. It just feels smaller because that fucking jet engine in my room

every day just... First of all, it's killing me. I wake up with like chest pains every morning. Here's the machines are attacking you already. This bus that wasn't it? COVID. I don't know, dude,

because then I woke up the other day and I was like sick as fuck. Did I tell you about this? No, dude, I hadn't taken my LC, bro. I hadn't taken my Zoloft in a week. And as I ran out of my prescription, then I went to Philly and then I came back and I kept on forgetting have LC, bro. I hadn't taken my Zoloft in a week. And so I ran out of my prescription.

Then I went to Philly. And then I came back and I kept on forgetting to pick it up. I woke up on Saturday morning like on my deathbed. Like 100 something fever. Because you didn't have Zoloft? I took it. You were depressed to death? 30 seconds later, I was like, I could like feel my body. Like I felt like when Thanos gets all the stones and the gauntlet

except it was just thoughts yeah dude literally it was crazy because I was withdrawing you just were like the whole movie inside out exploded inside of you literally just feeling every emotion it was amazing you definitely were withdrawing I was I was about to have to cancel I had two shows

and I was going to cancel one of them I was going to cancel both of them and then I took it and I was like fuck you I went out I was about to have to cancel. I had two shows and I was going to cancel one of them. I was going to cancel both of them. And then I took it and I was like, fuck yeah. I went out. I got fucked up. If you just didn't get your fix of fucking anti-Ds. Yeah, it got me thinking. I was like, wow, so I can never quit this. Oh yeah, at all. No. I don't really give a fuck. The drug companies want. Who cares?

Yeah, what does it matter? Taking a pill every day. Literally. I'm not even kidding. What does it matter? Just take a fucking pill every day? Everyone's always like, oh, I'm so depressed, but I'm not going to take pills. I don't want to be relying on that. It's like, why? Yeah, like you just want to be depressed? It's literally just serotonin. Just fucking take it. I wouldn't mind being a dude who took like a fucking

box of pills every day. Who just had like a ton of shit. Who? My dad. Does he? He would take like 700 pills for his heart. Really? Yeah. What's his heart problem? He had a heart attack. What? Well, like, yeah. He had to get a double

bypass. That shit wasn't funny, bro. I thought you were about to tell a joke. No. He has to take like 100 pills a day, though. Damn, dude. He's always got alarms going off and it's so annoying. Of just when to take a pill? Do you think that he's stressed like you? How do you make sure that... I feel like heart disease is... Oh, I'm going to have it.

You are going to? His dad had to get a quadruple bypass. God damn, dude. They're both in shape. Damn. Just stress. Does he make the Thursday an R on the pill box? No, what does that mean?

Sometimes it's Monday, Tuesday, and then... Oh, I see. I don't know. I've never given his box the full... You've got to examine that shit. I mean, the pill bottles've never given this box the full. You got to examine that shit. Yeah. I mean, the pill bottles that have timers on the top

have to be the fucking smartest thing. I always want one of those. See, my thing is I would do the box and then I would run out and then I would never fill it up again. Yeah. It's tough.

And that's the same reason that you don't have any, like, space in your room. Like, if you were industrious, like, you'd fill the box. If you were industrious, you'd, like, make, like, loft shelves or whatever. Really should. i really should because i think it would improve

my quality of life a lot i know that's why i'm telling you you need to go trans because if you're a woman you'd be like such a better fucking organizer if you just like uh you because it'd be nesting it would be a biological need that you had to like nest and make sure your house looks fucking sweet and nice and like presentable for for when eventually you got into estrus and wanted to have babies. Yeah, I know. I should. Where am I going to go buy a dresser? Should I just get those?

Are you asking me what stores sell dressers? If someone tries to buy something in New York, they're like, oh, we can order it for you. It'll be here in a month. Why don't you just order it to your house and then get it to us? Grab it to build it. I have this idea in my head now. Now I need to leave here and I need to go in a month. Why don't you just order it to your house and then get it to build it? I have this idea in my head now. Now I need to leave here

and I need to go buy a dresser. Do you have room for it? No. Do you have room for it? Yeah. Do you want him to buy it? I want it online. I want it in my hands today.

Why? You're not going to build it. It's going to sit on a... No, I can't get a wood. That's out of the question. It has to be one of those ones that's just... A plastic? Plastic or some shit.

Yeah. Or like a chest. I feel like people used to just put shit in a fucking yeah my grandparents used to just have chests in every room really and my grandma just found a glock in the chest wrapped up in a towel it wasn't your grandfather's we went over no they didn't know whose it was so someone no wonder your dad has heart problems he's fucking stressed over the murder he's trying no no this is the other side of the family. The other side of the family. They used to have a bunch of guns.

Definitely was. That's why you don't talk to them. No, no. I did. This is the one I do talk to. Oh, got you. Got you. And we used to always go to their house.

They grew up on my mom grew up on the Cape and we used to go to their house like every summer for like the whole summer basically. And one day she like called my grandma called my mom and she's like, yeah, we like found a gun to go and it's like a fucking like, i don't know what kind of gun it would be but it was like a flashy like silver gun really and it's literally a revolver owl like under a bunch of clothes in a bag or in a in like in a chest what the fuck someone in your family was sweating she turned it in serial number filed off or what? Oh yeah, it was a burner. Really? No. That would have been so fucking

sweet. Yeah, she turned it in. My grandpa went insane for a bit. Murder on the Cape. Sounds like a fucking sweet-ass novel. Dude, every single horror movie takes place on the Cape. Yeah. A lot of horror movies take place in Massachusetts. They do. Or like New England, at least. In a lot of novels, like women

love to read a novel about like somebody dying on vacation or some shit like that like some panic yeah like a high-powered yeah like someone has an affair on vacation and someone gets killed i mean it's good shit dude i yeah i just started watching this documentary fuck what's it called? About how they caught the Golden State Killer. And it's like there's a comedian whose wife wrote, she was writing a book about it.

She's doing some super deep, she was like a murder blogger or something, and then she started writing a book about it, and then halfway through, when she was about to finish the book. Francis, a murder blogger? Okay. She was writing the blog, or when she was finishing up the book she got murder no way it's like a very famous comedian's wife she fished her wish yeah uh yeah tough to joke about murder but you would know it if i told you but that is a fucking oh wait it wasn't pat

oswald yeah i was really yeah got murdered? I thought she just died. I didn't realize she got murdered. Oh, no. Maybe she didn't get murdered. That's just what someone told me. Yeah, I think she just died. I think she died. I don't know, but he's already remarried. Yeah, because he fucking murdered her, dude. You think it was? P.O. fucking murdered a bitch?

Was she O.D.? She died in her sleep unexpectedly. I thought he was like sobbing though. I feel like he was like. Because he's the Golden State Killer, dude. Pat Nolswald? Yeah. From King of Queens?

Yeah. The voice of Ratatouille? There's actually, there are a lot of theories that he did kill her though. Really? Yeah. Yeah, there actually is. But he finished the book for her because he already fucking knew it from experience. He had a first hand.

The book needed an ending. That's our stand up news. That's our slash stand up. I can find anything about it. They think it's a 4chan rumor. Damn. That's fucking... Was that before or after he got Ratatouille?

You think that they would still show Ratatouille everywhere knowing that he was the voice of it everyone i don't know remember when he remember when he posted that uh that picture of him apologizing for like being friends with dave chapelle yeah of uh like headshot of him in the mirror or something like that had someone take a picture of him writing an apology letter yeah getting too famous like that like uh i guess it's just being in a disney movie will make you that famous yeah but like Getting too famous like that, like, uh, I guess it's just being in a Disney movie will make you that famous, but like getting too famous like that is, uh, has to just be terrible for trying to be a comedian. It's probably sweet if you're any other type of actor and you can just be self-important, but like, you can't take the piss out of yourself if you're doing like mirror selfie apology videos or whatever. Like you have to be able to make fun of

yourself. No, I think, I think there are a lot of people who do comedy like stand-up as like a leveraging way to get into like show business though you think so i think like a lot of people's the dream is to be in a disney movie or to like be an actor it is interesting when stand-up people talk about stand-up as like an art form because like uh it is and that is true but it's also like when you talk about it being like your art that like takes kind of the joke out of it. Oh yeah 100%. But no talk about how it's your art and shit.

I would never say that. That's ridiculously weird. You will get to some point like that. This is my fucking life. No no. I dedicated my fucking life to this shit. I am on grind mode right now though i know i gotta step my i gotta step my level up yeah you're gonna step your level up at barstool as well i know that i know that you're about to step up as far as like how much you fucking

grind for the fucking stool and stripes bro how much you my life is the stool and stripes i've given everything to this company i know clip that please fucking clip that everything everything you wake up i got nothing left you leave it all on the fucking table the fucking scrutiny that you have to undergo dave doesn't know shit about that now he's somewhere on fucking montauk poor bastard i went to montauk this weekend i know you didn't tell anyone you were going to be gone on friday kind of a scumbag move. Yeah, I did. We were all, where's Ron?

Oh, should we wait? Should we start? I did tell everybody. I said at the end of the show on Thursday that I wasn't going to be there on Friday, but you were checked out. I'll be mistaken with someone else. Yes, brother. You need to fucking do more meditations so you can learn how to live in the moment, brother.

I do need to do more meditations. I've actually been thinking about it. I know. I always am like, I'm going to meditate. It's a good idea and then I never do it. I meditated before your fucking stand-up show. You were nervous? No, so I could fucking be a better viewer of you.

I was like, dude, I really want to be in the moment. Are you nervous at all or no? No. My wife thought I was nervous, but I was really want to be in the moment. Were you nervous at all or no? No. My wife thought I was nervous, but I was like taking notes on your set to go up and talk about it. And she was like, she was like, give me advice. She was like, chin up.

Put your shoulders back. You're going to be fine. And I was just like taking notes on my phone of like shit to talk about, about your set. She thought I was like going over what I had to say, but I was really just, I just had hunched phone posture, fucking taking notes. Did you watch the whole show or did you stay in the green room?

No, I watched both shows from the side. Oh, nice. Nice. It was fucking dope. Yeah. Well, I guess we haven't even talked about Philly. So yeah, Rowan came up. He came to Philly for the second, for this, for Thursday or what was it?

On a Wednesday. Wednesday. The Wednesday shows. For both shows on Wednesday. We did a little bump mics action. Just kind of shot the shit. We were just shooting the shit. Proud went bananas. Holy fuck. Put it in this episode. Oh both shows on Wednesday. We did a little bump mics action. Just kind of shot the shit. We were just shooting the shit. Proud went bananas.

Holy fuck. Put it in this episode. No, no, no. We don't need to do that. Yeah. Good part of the video of him walking out, but not the material stuff. But then isn't that like only me like has like trying to be funny? Like I'm just saying like, look how loud people fucking cheered for me.

Like that's just not funny. No, but it's. Like, yo, they fucking love me out there, dude. But it's cool. They were going fucking ape shit for me like that's just not funny like yo they fucking love me out there dude but it's cool they were going fucking ape shit for me you gotta think when you do something you think what would andrew schultz do he would put that video in yo they went crazy for me i see videos like that sometimes and i'm like goddamn i tom segura posted a video i I think yesterday or today, of him walking out. He was doing an arena show. And I'm like, dude, how do this many people know him?

It was like 30,000 people. I always think that about basketball teams. I'm like, you know about the Knicks too, bro? 20,000 people know about the fucking Celtics, dude? Like imagine being one person Who could sell out an arena That would be horrifying And just with your words

Yeah You don't even know how to play piano Billy Joel I get it Music is like Do you think people get nervous for like concerts As a musician after a while Yes You're just playing the same songs

you're just saying the same words you don't even have to hit the right pitch yeah but like if you go like if you do if you do a con billy joel does a concert no one's gonna be like oh piano man sucks i saw springsteen live in concert and i walked away thinking that it sucked why what is frank what's frank doing here? What was that? He just came up and gave like a pissed off look. He looked at you and then just like still doing shit with fucking

Oh, he probably wants you to do a soda review. That's what it is. You're going to have to pass this duty on to someone else. Yeah. It is my most critically acclaimed work working with his soda reviews. It is. But it's preposterous

to think that musicians don't get nervous. I don't know. Everybody that does shit in front of other people, like athletes, but I've had the same thought about like athletes

just like athletes get nervous. Yeah, because that's true. I would never even think that athletes, like I would never even cross my mind. Like before a big ass basketball game, I'm sure like fucking athletes is like terrified.

Yeah, first game in the NBA, probably shitting your pants. My buddy was like a kicker turner for football and like anytime a kickoff would happen, the ball would be in the air and like as it was in his air, in the air, he would just look down and like throw up

and fucking run it back. And he was super nice with it. Like he would return shit for touchdowns. up and fucking run it back and he was super nice with it like he would return shit for touchdowns my boy wicks said dude he's fucking but he just i think sometimes the people with the most talent the most like natural raw talent also have like the most anxiety or maybe i'm just thinking of this dude who i fucking admire his talent bill hater's got some funny stories about that about his anxiety yeah what uh like he he gets nervous before like snl and shit like that yeah i think he said he would have like a panic attack like every time before snl caught that fucking fly no big deal uh yeah it's uh it's probably terrifying you know did did bo burnham do stand up before he was famous i think he got famous doing the piano.

Did he just go straight to theaters? I think he was doing the piano, and then he fucking got famous on YouTube the same kind of way that you did. Was he doing the piano on stage? Do you know that? I don't know. I think so. I think he was, and then he would go up on stage. He probably did a year of colleges. When dudes get famous that fast, it's probably sweet as fuck for them but also well he's so disconcerting because like why did he have to stop because he was having panic attacks on stage oh really yeah yeah yeah maybe he needed some anti-d's bro maybe he wasn't trying to take a pill a day

now he needs some yeah he could use that but i i was always just curious because i i know like his youtube videos popped when he was so young and i always wondered if he just was that famous from youtube and just went like straight into doing theaters for like the first time he ever did a show it probably was like that but you had to kind of like uh calm it down it's crazy when uh people who are famous for other shit start doing stand-up too like didn't like john mayer had like a while where he was just doing stand-up and shit like that he was no bro isn't your boy uh i mean i just know this anecdotally that he would just do stand-up and just kind of like pop in places and just try to do some stand-up. But I admire people trying to do, like whenever somebody, if like a stand-up makes like a song or some shit like that,

like I admire people trying to do different types of things, even though that's not what people want to see. Well, who's doing stand-up right now? Like T.I.? Yeah. They hate him. And it might suck, but, like, I admire him trying. It's like you're... Once you get so famous at one thing,

it's probably, like, pretty scary to be, like, judged for doing something else. Yeah, definitely. It's gotta be. That's why you gotta try some new shit, bro. Like, fucking being a professional athlete, maybe. Yeah.

Yeah, probably. Yeah, you should definitely give that shit a shot. But, yeah, I'm trying to you should definitely give that shit a shot. But, um, yeah, I'm trying to do some new shit, uh, including uh, pop punk. If people still want to buy tickets for these shows, we got a show in fucking Atlantic City this coming weekend. It's on Friday in Atlantic City.

Oh, hells yeah. Please come to that show in Atlantic City. I'll fucking love if people came to that show in Atlantic City. We're gonna be- Yeah, go see that. It'll be a blast. Those things are like parties is an absolute rager it's a fucking absolute rager party dude your favorite barstool sports personality is performing yes and we're gonna be giving away fucking cash tons of money and then the next the next week we have a show in new york uh on that saturday i think the sixth so definitely come to see or maybe that's a friday come to see

that shit too though god damn you know little sass you're not the only one that gets to fucking plug shit out here brother now okay so now after you've bought the tickets to all of our own shows why don't you head on over to uh my instagram or my twitter and my link tree and I will be in St. Louis this weekend with Francis Ellis, friend of the podcast. And then I will be in Providence and Atlanta in the coming weeks. So go check that out. You've got to fuck. We got a hell of a show planned for you guys. It's going to be a fun time.

And if you can't get the ticket straight up, make sure you get them on GameTime. GameTime is a ticketing app. Hells yeah. Dude, SAS does have resale tickets and they're going for $120 to $190. Yeah, no one, but we talked about that.

No one's buying that shit, dude. I think that if people are selling it, people are buying it. That means that there's a market. If someone has proof that they bought one of my tickets for $190,

I will reimburse you. That's stupid to say. I'm not making the money. But then people can get free tickets to your show just by getting $190, I will reimburse you. That's stupid to say. I'm not making the money. But then people can get free tickets to your show just by getting $190 tickets. They buy $190 tickets. Okay, well, I meant for the Philly shows. Yeah, never mind. Scratch that.

That deal's off. That deal's off. But you can still get way better deals than that. You can get that cheap-ass ticketing with our good friends at GameTime, the ticketing app that makes it easier than ever to score last-minute deals on tickets to sports, concerts, shows, even stand-up comedy shows. And you're guaranteed the lowest price. They've cracked the code on how to score deals on last-minute tickets. So you could even go down to a baseball game for under $15 all-in on GameTime. a baseball game for under $15 all in on game time.

Yankees tickets, $14. Red Sox, $14. Mets, $13. Braves, $14. Cubs, $12. Dude, you name a team, Game Time has the hookup for some deals on how to get you

into the ballpark. Sass, talk to the motherfucking people. People. Talk to the people. I use Game Time all the time. If you want to use Game Time, you got to download the Game Time app, go to the motherfucking people. People. I love GameTime. I use GameTime all the time. If you want to use GameTime, you got to download the GameTime app, go to the account tab,

create a login and redeem code BOYDAD for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. And also keep in mind, that's $20 off your first purchase. What did it say? Red Sox tickets were $14? That's a steal.

For the Red Sox? I've never been to Fenway, bro. You always told me you'd take me to see the Monstie. Yeah. So download GameTime. Last minute tickets. Lowest price guaranteed. Use code BOYDAD.

All caps. For $20 off your first purchase. Dude, and while we're fucking ushering people to go do shit for us, watch the first episode of Barstool's Most Dangerous Game Show. Definitely do that. It's a hit. Because the first episode came out on Sunday. Next episode's coming out today, this evening.

Well, yeah, it's Tuesday. Yeah, so yeah. Yeah, if you're listening to this today, the day it's dropped. I said exactly what the fuck I meant. I know. You said it right. I don't know why. I tried to overcorrect.

That's all right, brother. Such a fucking idiot. No, don't say that, dude. I do the same shit all the time. Dude know. You said it right. I don't know why. I tried to overcorrect. That's all right, brother. Such a fucking idiot. No, don't say that, dude. I do the same shit all the time. Dude, you're the fucking man in the arena, bro. You're just under the spotlight. Man in the arena, aren't I? There's going to be a little bit more scrutiny.

I told you that shit last night. What? Man in the arena. Why? What are you feeling down about? Down about? I had a rough set last night. Did you?

I'm just so hard on myself like i could have like every joke work and then if one joke doesn't do well i'm like well that i'm gonna fucking kill myself now yeah you're just too hard on yourself that's what it is your biggest drawback also it was too hard of a worker but also it was a bad set but there's also only like 10 people there but then like i was like whatever it was like 10 people, but there's also only like 10 people there. But then like I was like, whatever. It was like 10 people. I was like, who gives a fuck? And then like three people come up to me. They're like, yo, dude, we came here to see you.

Like, and it sucked, dude. What was that? I was like, yeah, just don't tell anyone about this. Yeah. You just gave him some cash. That's what I said. I said, don't tell anyone about it. You memory wipe them.

You gave him the men in black. You never seen Men in Black? No, I have. Have you? Yes. Actually, I used to have it on disc. Damn, dude. My dad gave me a DVD for my birthday this year of The Godfather.

That's a good gift. Thanks, dude. Actually, it was a box set of three DVDs of The Godfather. Three different Godfathers. One, two, and three. It was pretty fucking sweet. That's actually a good gift. You making fun of my fucking pops, dude?

Oh, that's a good gift. I like a good box set. Yeah, but they were so slim. You didn't really need a thick box. Now they do the box sets, they cheap out, and they give you the slim-ass discs. I know. Not the discs but like the packages i borrowed a vhs box set from my boy tom leonard one time growing up of all five rockies

and i never gave it back to him it's still just sitting in my fucking house collector's item dude it definitely is a collector's item what do you think the most valuable thing you have is in my like in my room or like in total in total the most valuable thing that you have access to you have any collector's items you have anything that you think would really pop at an auction i have a baseball that's signed by ted williams i have the original honus wagner card i don't know it's that expensive i don't have anything valuable i don't think a baseball card signed by or baseball assigned by ted williams sounds pretty valuable yeah i don't have anything valuable, I don't think. A baseball card signed by, or a baseball signed by Ted Williams sounds pretty valuable. Yeah, but I don't know, like, I don't know how much that would go for.

Tyler? Quite a bit. Yeah, I think quite a bit, dude. I think that we could fucking give up this comedy dream and fucking make it. It's signed by the whole team, too. His name is in big letters. I wonder why. In a case.

Is it real? It takes down the value. Probably. 400 bucks big letters. I wonder why. In a case. Is it real? It actually takes down the value. Probably. $400. Nothing. Really? $400 for a Ted Williams actual signed ball? Yeah, or photo for $100. What? I thought that that would be... Are autographs expensive or no?

Owen, what you're saying, is that right? That it takes down the value of it? Yeah, I have a glove with Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera, but it's worth less because it has Melky Cabrera and Robinson Cano as well. Makes sense. I feel like photographs just killed the autograph. Better graph. Significantly better graph.

Why would you want someone's signature when you can just get a picture with them? They'd be like, hey, look, this is me and Ted Williams. There's something tangible about an autograph, though. It's like he touched this thing. Yeah, and then you'd be like, look, he touched me. See, this is part of my shoulder. No one gets autographs anymore. But wait, you didn't see that grown man autograph fan at the All-Star game that was like elbowing a little kid no i did see that i did see that but but also i felt i feel

like it's probably different if you're older what do you mean like you're still like oh i need to get an autograph of this person it's like a secondary market though where people are going like with 10 headshots of like dave being like hey can you can you sign this peach review big fan from back yeah but like no one could no one's buying that shit, are they? I don't know. Obviously not if fucking Ted Williams, but there's... Didn't Baker Mayfield or...

Or no, Johnny Manziel got in trouble because he was signing a billion things to... Who's buying that? I don't know. It's stupid as fuck. It's playing, though. Ted Williams has been super dead for a long time. Yeah, yeah.

It's true. Right. But I feel like that would make it more valuable. There's a, it's a finite amount of those. Like, Baker Mayfield could go fuck up the market. Johnny Manziel could fuck up the market and sign a billion more autographs. Wouldn't you be like, well, this doesn't really mean anything. Like, I feel like that's more of like a, like if you get something autographed, like, oh,

wow, I met this person. Like, this is cool for me to have. Yeah. Why would you buy someone else's signet? Why would you buy? I'm not surprised the Tag Williams thing. Why would you be like, I guess he's dead now, so it's different. But why would you be like, oh, I'm going to buy this copy, this photo of Dave signed by Dave?

Oh, yeah. This is a fraud industry. Top seven most valuable. The seventh is only $125,000. Really? Albert Einstein. His autograph? Okay, maybe I take back everything I just said, because that's sick.

What, have an Einstein for $125,000? Have an Einstein autograph? That would be so sick. Jimi Hendrix, $200,000. I'm fucking... Abe Ruth. I'm pulling back $38,000. John Lennon 525k

Abe Lincoln 3.7 mil that's fire that's fire Shakespeare 5 mil really dude that's

cause that now I'm thinking like I'm pulling back I think it was just Ted Williams I think I just don't want a Ted Williams

signature but historic people like Shakespeare having Shakespeare's John Hancock's John Hancock. Yeah, dude. George Washington, 9.8 mil. Hancock should be the white whale. It should be the one. He should be the dopest one.

But I mean, these dudes were just signing letters, too. Are any of these just specific autographs? Can these actually be autographs or are these just like a stamp? It has to be real. It can't be a stamp. It has actually be autographs or are these just like a stamp? It has to be real. It can't be a stamp. It has to be authenticated or some shit. Einstein was just hamping off. This will reverse something. Joe DiMaggio

and Marilyn Monroe baseball. A double feature. That shit has to be fake, bro. There's no way that they were signing it together knowing that... I think those two sucked and fucked. Wasn't she stinky? I heard she was stinky as fuck.

I heard that she was just like a gross pig bitch that just would like eat in bed and like would fucking like develop a stink. Like she basically lived how you live. She would just like fucking have... Up close she reeked of body odor and was also a pig between the sheets. I told you she was a pig.

She was a stinky pig, bro. Baseball legend and second hubby Joe DiMaggio complains that the blonde bombshell stunk to high heaven. That's hilarious. Yeah, it is. Stunk to high heaven. That's gotta be like the meanest thing. You would avoid bathing for days and weeks on end. Especially back then.

Yeah. Saying she stunk to high heavens. Like a New York. That's like a curse on someone. Dude, old timey roasts like hit way harder now. Like what other ones are you thinking of? I don't know. What's that video that we always watch?

What does he say? Which one? Yeah, you're a crumb. Oh, you're a crumb. Yes, you're stunk to high heaven. You're a lush. You're a lush. You're a crumb bum.

Yeah, they did used to be able to fry people up badly but her stinking to high heaven must have just been her way of you know how like girls will be like real hot and then try to do something like to like take away their hotness and like see if their hotness still stands up that was probably monroe trying to just be like let me see if i'm if i can be stinky as fuck and still get the Playboy cover. Dude, stinky people are the worst. I know. That's got to be one of the worst characteristics you can have.

And she was just parading around being hot and stinky. Imagine how bad it smelled in that photo shoot where the fucking air was coming up her dress. You know that famous? Yeah, the subway air. you know that like famous oh yeah the subway air whipping through monroe's desk like shooting her fucking stank undercarriage out through her mouth mole people were like ew it smells like maryland pussy yeah she cleared out the fucking subway with her stank ass pussy that would be nasty yeah that would be nasty to fuck Marilyn Monroe. You could not pay me. It grows with her fucking away, dude.

She's gross. I would never. I was way more of a Jane Mansfield guy. I fuck with Jane Mansfield way more heavy. Talking about Marilyn Monroe, I'd be like, no, I don't think I would ever hit that. Oh, gross, bro. Never hit that, dude. Fuck no, dude.

There was definitely dudes at the time. Some of my buddies that I was with from home a couple weeks ago, they're like, we were friends all in high school. They weren't my best friends, but that's something that they would actually talk about. Well, that's saying I wouldn't

fuck. Bro, would you tap that? Hell no, dude. Gross. And they all like punch each other like take their shirts off and shit start throwing each other they're all like d1 athletes and they're like they're all hilarious because that's just like i grew up with them they're rowers no no no they're all like like hockey players and lacrosse players and football i think one of the places football like real would you fuck her fuck no and then just strip naked and brawl with each other that's fucking gross dude i heard you got some snatch last night some fucking primo snatch

fuck my ass about it yeah you want to fuck me about it want me to suck you about it they're like they're like they're always they're those kind of guys that are just always busting balls and then they like want someone will take it to the too far and they'd be like bro you don't even fucking play d1 pussy like that's like real conversations that they have just snap all of a sudden it gets way

too real and it gets super tense in the room that's funny as fuck though I don't like when you say that to Nick and Kyle about not doing stand-up. Yeah. I'm like, bro, you've never even been in the arena. You don't fucking know what it's like to hear the roar of a live crowd. You don't know what that adrenaline rush is like.

You don't know what it's like to hear the crickets of a live crowd. You haven't been through what I've been through. You haven't been through the fucking ringer like I have. It's crazy that some of the bitches that were Monroe's age age are just like still alive right now and like they have to they're like forced to still live off that image like they couldn't like pivot wholesome the oldest fuck i think they're like 80 year old like whores who are still just dumping out their bags like i think that a lot of them just like pivot into like old whoredom what what is old whoredom like they

become old whores like that that's how they're like escorts no i don't but they're i think like old pinup ladies like i think still are just like trying to take pictures like with their like like bags out i'm almost positive that's still going on i don't i i would be very surprised if that was happening no i'm I'm stamping this. Yeah. Valid. Cancel your ass. No, we'll find some fucking... We'll find some pictures

of some old pin-up girls who are now fucking... You're saying that Monroe's old crew is still taking... They're all taking nudes still? Yes. Where are they going?

Find some old broads that are like that. Tyler, please help me out here. Monroe's sister is the third highest grosser on OnlyFans. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Is Jane Mansfield's ass still alive? What do we got? Some old pinup broads? I was never really into like the, I know that was like kind of your era, but I don't think we were ever into like the newspaper porn. See? Dude, did you have a pinup era of jerking off? The one that you'd have to order on the fucking-

Of jerking off? Yeah, when I was growing up. To call a phone number? That's all we had. Describe an image to you? Before the advent, it was pin-ups and then we had phone sex operators. Rest in peace to cone titties, though. Fax over a half-naked woman.

Yeah, rest in peace to the cone titties. Rest in peace to the elf shoe titty, too. The one that kind of like curly cued that like went down like this and kind of like fucking curly cued up like a galaxy a titty that just looked like a frink it is crazy how much like titties have changed over the years it's true like if you ever watch like an old movie out of context that's hilarious yeah you ever watch an old titty yeah you ever watch an old titty if you ever watch an old movie they're always shirtless and you're like that's not what titties look

like yeah I know I'm like I know and that's not it yeah because me and my fucking hockey boys have fucked over it me and my hockey boys love talking would you fuck that absolutely not bro are they long?

Yeah. What do you think it is? Bra technology? Yeah, definitely. We need to get a fucking woman's opinion on this. This hat is itchy, dude. Oh, and you have like lice or something? No. Is that an Owen hat? It's a hat. I thought it looked swaggy. A five panel?

I know, right? It's fly as fuck. Three panels. Kind of my thing now. How many panels is that hat, bro? 30 panels. That's a fucking ton of panels. That's a shit fuck of panels, bro. Panels. Speaking of panels.

Bird dogs has the best. Bird dogs are the best and only shorts you should be wearing this summer. I love my bird dogs. I wear them every day that's why i do love bird dogs like the built-in liner like the pockets that fit my phone they got the fucking sweet designs too they have pants they have shorts they got built-in undercarriage like a little liner to the if marilyn monroe was wearing bird dogs she wouldn't have stunk so bad oh no because the yeah she would have had that uh like built-in underwear

and it wicks they didn't have the technology right then probably to wick she probably had some kind of sewage dripping off and yeah and but bird dog with bird dogs Louisiana Monroe bro Louisiana are you telling me you'd fucking hit that bro

yo fucking pause bro you'd fucking hit that, bro? Yo, fucking pause, bro. You'd have sex with a girl? Anyway, Bird Dogs, they got sweet-ass designs. I was wearing their seersucker shit this past week. This is an R-rated ad. Huh? This is an R-rated ad. It says we're allowed to go R-rated, right? Yeah, we can contain the R.

We can say the R word. And was I not? Yeah, that's why. Hard R's, R words, everything. They contain R-rated content. Holy shit, dude. I was going to stop you for cussing. No, bro. Read the top, bro.

They want me to cuss. That's what's really going to bring in the fucking edgy fans. Yeah. Bird dogs. Edgy. We're an edgy group. And we move fucking merch. Bird dogs are for people that don't want to play by the rules.

And we're that. Don't want to fall into the system of the woke left. Yeah. Bird dogs are for explorers. And for those who dare to break out of the box. Go to birddogs.com. Enter promo code sun. And they'll throw in a free bird dogs tumbler.

That's birddogs.com. Promo code sun. And boom. Free bird dogs tumbler. And your pair of bird dogs tumbler. That's birddogs.com, promo code sun, and boom, free bird dogs tumbler and your pair of bird dogs. I wouldn't stop at just buying one item though. I would load up on items. They're going to carry you through the end of the summer. They're going to carry you into the fall and it's very transferable. You want items in your wardrobe that can be staples that you can build around. Bird dogs is exactly that. When you think of summer, think bird dogs. When you think of fall, think bird dogs.

They're the only bottoms that you're ever going to need. You will not take these things off. I fucking promise you, bro. I think of anything, I think bird dogs. Fuck yeah, bro. Go on over to birddogs.com. And we move fucking units here at Son of a Boy Dad. We fucking activate our listeners and they do what the fuck we tell them to, dude.

We activate the fucking brand. Remember when we had one of those big ass company meetings? I think one's coming up. There's an end of summy one. Oh, they took you off the email though. They changed your key card too. I got bad news for you, bro.'s tough you're fired oh that oh that's what i was gonna say about the francis thing was everyone was acting like i ever it was everyone was being

like yeah sass is on the chopping block for sure what who was like that because i like made a joke about my salary or something it's crazy that like eight months later people are still like fired up talking about my salary people also pick pocket watching bro people pick up weird like uh details and then like extrapolate them and like my talk about them like fact like nothing is happening in my brain right now this is just auto this is autopilot just dumping shit out but people will take this as gospel yeah people and they'll like talk about like people are like oh, like Dave said that like Roan makes the company zero money. Oh yeah. He's not a fucking earner.

Yeah. Dude, what, what are you fucking talking? Funniest is when they're like, uh, I was going to say, keep going, keep going. Keep spitting. People just, uh, well they'll just like run with something and act like it's. Also that's a, that's like a false lump in. I don't think you fall in line with Kyle and Seth.

Does Caleb not make the company money either? It's just interesting how people are just wrong about a lot of shit and they'll just act like it as fact, but then they'll use that as a building block to build

more facts on so like if this thing is true then this thing also must be true so strange yeah like if someone was like like francis said something about like like he wanted to complain to sales and i said like don't it's a corporation and then someone was like when dave sees this it's over it's like first of all dave will never see that i think dave is at home like i'm gonna let's watch the new son of a boy that episode yeah he said with chicken yeah let's oh we're in my we're my 50 million dollar mansion they're in the chicken coop hamptons let's throw on let's throw on the new boy dad episode they're in the roost yeah it uh it's definitely never

happening also it's like i'm not saying like people act like everything I'm saying, I'm like 100% serious. Joke. It's supposed to be a comedy podcast. Yeah, you didn't see Edward Snowden tweeting about like Hemingway's old philosophy of like he never wanted his letters published. Like he had like a philosophy that the small things that you say like aren't you,

like you shouldn't, everything that you've ever said on record like shouldn't be like defining of you yeah and snowden was basically like you're not your tweets dude if you like tweeted some like crazy shit like you're probably just like dumping out your emotion at that second but like a single emotion of yours like a single thing you say like it's a corporation that doesn't mean like you're this anti-corporation like fucking yeah you love corporations actually you're obsessed i'm on i'm on the like you're this anti-corporation like fucking yeah you love corporations actually you're obsessed i'm on i'm on the record in a corporation right now like you're a fucking cog in the wheel of a corp you love barstool dude i do you would never unionize you hate a thing

where everyone thinks i fucking like hate barstool i don't you love it it's flash i don't you love it dude and it's fucking funny if people found out that you were going to fucking Erica's house for barbecues and everything like that. Weekly. You fucking bake the pies. Yeah. You bring over the fucking, like, should I bring an appetizer or a dessert? And then you want to bring in both. Of course I do.

That's just how I am. You're a fucking overachiever and they don't know that. So maybe they should build on that as a fucking building block. They want to fucking talk out of turn about fucking how we get down out here. That's damn true. Isn't that the truth? You know what? Let's yeah, let's do a mega thread on Sass and Erica's bar.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we need a mega thread. Mega thread. It's good. Sass has been hanging out with Erica. What? They can't get along. Wait, Owen, what were you saying to S ass earlier a second ago when i interrupted you you said you were chiming in and out i fucking clumsily fucking talked over

you i feel like i just had a bunch of shit to say all at once and i forget everything i know that's that add i'll be fired up for a second i was thinking about the comments i said what do you love about barstool and he said his boys boys. I said the boys. I said my rider dies. Yeah. My family. Yes. This place is like a fucking home. It really is, dude. It's like a fucking fraternity, bro. These are all my fucking brothers

and sisters. These are all my pledges. Everybody that works. I was going to say, Dave also does not care when people like, we all joke about Barstool people think that someone's gonna be like oh I made a joke about Dave better not let this get to Prez

also like why the fuck do you care I won't go on this whole why let's keep it light let's keep it fun I like when you go off keep it fun let's keep it light no it's it's because people are gonna be pissed off at you no matter what bro you might as well just get it off your chest people are going to be like sass is a fucking you'll be a pussy no matter what dude yeah so that's why i'd rather just not talk about i'm i'm having a good time and i just want to uh i don't want to go to that space right

now yeah let's pivot to uvalde shadow realm where only demons go to death i want to go to my demons yeah it does bring out the best in you though that's when you make the best art yeah that's when you're really when you're charged up as an artist as a comedian you only want applause i don't really get angry anymore i just uh spit facts my big thing now is i spread love yeah he's been spreading positivity and love uh in all facets of his life. You spread love and fuck bitches. I don't hate anymore. Yeah, spread love is the fucking Brooklyn way, brother.

I'm trying to cut back on hating. Yeah? I don't hate anymore. Oh, you've gone cold turkey. Yeah. Is that a conscious thing? Sometimes I'll be typing out a hate paragraph to the boys, and then I delete it. That's important.

You can let yourself type it. Yeah, you've got to get it out. Delete it. Sometimes you want someone else to agree with you. And then you can like. I like to write it out on a piece of paper. So there's like something tangible there. And then I light the piece of paper on fire.

And just watch the emotion go away, bro. Seems a little bit dramatic. It's fucking sweet, dude. I'd rather just do the text and delete. I almost burned down my balcony the other day. I day that part without the on fire part in covid and then i went home for uh to get uh nice clothes the other day and just found a stack of letters oh my god what were you saying what oh was this when you stopped drinking around i don't know but uh that was fun were you drinking at the time when you were writing the letters cause that would be sweet I'll probably buy that book

I know that's the shit Hemingway was talking about Bukowski that would've been awesome yeah fuck I would love to hear a fucking modern day

handwritten letter or it just could be trash cause there's no like editing or deleting I'm interested to hear your letters maybe you could bring them in for a show and tell

maybe we could do a show and tell would that be nice I'd be down that'd be really nice a little visual for the YouTube yeah doing something I'm interested to hear your letters. Maybe you could bring them in for a show and tell. Maybe we could do a show and tell. Would that be nice? I'd be down. That'd be really nice. A little visual for the YouTube. Yeah, doing something a little bit fucking visual. Yeah, we should start making this more of like a prop comedy show.

Just do costumes every episode like Schultz. Yeah, yeah. Do they do that? They did for a bit. Yeah, they were designer clothes as a costume. Yeah. They were like Fendi as a costume. I met one of the guys last night.

The guy with the curly hair last night. Really? Mm-hmm. The, oh, no, you didn't guy. I don't know. I don't watch the show. Oh, snap. I don't watch, what is it, Flagrant?

Flagrant 2. Yeah. No, I've seen a couple episodes, but I'm only referencing his when Dave hits him with that. Are you still saying, what did he say? Are you saying mid? You're 38, you're saying mid? That's what they do.

He's like, you're still saying mid? And they're like. It's always like they have to remove the mic 10 feet away from them after. Even when he was on the yak, he tried to do it with these stationary mics. He hit it. Yeah. With his fucking hand, like he was on the yak, he tried to do it with these stationary mics. He hit it. Yeah. He was playing volleyball.

He spiked the shit. They're also like David Yermin earrings. You pop the Yermis off. Or they'll grab each other. I can't really shit on it because it clearly is working. And it makes it way sweeter. Also, come on the pod man that would be fucking dope that would be dope as fuck if he did

he was also like undeniably very nice in person cool guy I know you can tell that he's like secure in his success you know what I mean you know how some people are insecure in their success so they're like will be they'll be like a little bit'll be a little bit sassy a little bit and they'll

kick it back a little bit. Can you say a couple words on the mic just so we could be featuring Joey and get the clicks off your name? Is that cool? I have a guest coming right now. Is he live? No, it's not live. We're recording for tomorrow.

Son of a boy, dad. Oh, what are you guys doing in here? We just wanted to have a little bit of a different change of scenery. I got to say. See, this is where I didn't even need to ask anything. You're just a font of like content. I just want to say, and this is really savvy, but you are such a brilliant host and such a great timed comedian on that new show.

Thank you so much. That's so nice of you. You killed it. And you are so innocent and just there to like have fun and not about the bullshit. Exactly. Bug eating.

You were like, fuck that. A lot of the comments though were like, this needs Joey. I know, I saw. That was love though. People are like, you're like hot sauce. You're just good on everything.

What's the matches for mansions, beds, as comfortable as everyone's saying? His ass was fucking on him, so... Hell no. Maybe ask him. What with all dudes? It was self-love. He was pounding off on him, but that's still fucking... All right, I know that was across the line.

No, I loved it. I got to wait for a few more minutes before I stand back up, in fact. But I'm excited. I'm excited to watch the outcome. Will the show be over by next week? No. By next week, there'll still be another, there'll be two more episodes, Tuesday and Thursday of next week. There still has to...

One on tonight? Yes, on Tuesday. There's one on tonight, on Tuesday night, as this is coming out. It's my favorite show on TV right now. Shut the fuck up, dude. And Tommy's scream when he said they're moving, they're alive. I'm trying to make that my ringtone on my phone. How was the Jersey

Shore? I saw you were wearing some balls beachwear. Yeah, I went to Jersey Shore. Jeff Gillo was there, or Jersey Jeff, I was like to call him because he's a completely different beast over there. Yeah, what's he like over there? Can I be honest? I think he's, you ever see Charles Manson's documentary? I think he's like, that's what i got the vibe was because it's him and he has a pack of fucking like nine girls that he that he like he like runs i think those girls are being held

captive by jersey jersey jeff he's manson he's making those girls do all the dirty work and they're like a little bit of a cult yes it. It's very ritualistic and very something's up. It's like Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. I wouldn't be surprised if he just had – he made them all wear very long dresses and they went to a cliff with a maypole and danced around it or some shit like that. There's something ritualistic going on. He's even just taking the picture of the one girl and he'll just put it on the story. a picture of the one girl and he'll just like put it on the story. Yeah, so I think if there are things there's a crime spree in New Jersey now you hear

DJs or someone's you know someone's acrylic nails are getting ripped off by the cuticles. I think those girls would have to be responsible and I think Jeff D'Lo's the mastermind of it all. Something's up down there. I don't know what it is but um. Yeah, you had boots in the ground though and you still couldn't figure it out. Yeah.

Are you trying to figure it out? I just don't want to get in trouble so I just kind of did whatever he said and kind of went with the flow. What's the scene down there like? Are there dudes at DJs? Are there straight dudes only at DJs? Believe it or not, I brought

two different guys home from DJs. Are you serious? One of them told me that he wasn't attracted to me but he still cuddled with me. Then he moved back to Pittsburgh. And then the other one, he was just... We haven't seen Nick since. The other one was just,

you know, he was in DTF so I got rid of his ass. But you have to run because my interview's here. This is perfect. Thank you so much. Love you guys.

Thanks. Appreciate it. Thank you for elevating our show with your presence. Absolute best. Yes. Love it, dude you for elevating our show with your presence. Absolute best. Yes. Love it, dude. He's fucking hilarious.

He's unreal. Watch out and about. Out and about is fucking. The future. It is the fucking future. It's fucking massive. Future is gay. There's one kid I'm friends with.

Every time they bring him up on stage or like the host will come up and they'll be like, what do you want us to bring you up as? And he just goes the future are you serious yeah oh my god dude he's kidding they don't actually bring him up as that I could see I thought he was

you've told me about some of your friends I feel like some comedians do have a little bit of an ego in fact all of them in some ways a lot of people they won't even like they won't even like look at you if you haven't been doing it for like 15 years i know it is funny it's crazy well no one has to suffer through that more than you probably what not look at people not looking at me no i'm saying that you haven't been doing it for 15 years so those people are obviously like there's no pretending that you've been doing it for 15 oh no

now you have to have been doing it since you were six years old. Yeah, no, I don't care. Also, there was players on the Cavs trying to humble LeBron his first year. Right. Ilgauskas was like, this is my team. He's like, nah, Big Z. You've got to see a lot of yourself in that situation. I do. You are LeBron James.

I'm the worst of myself in that situation. Fucking early on all-star. Just absolute fucking stud in this bitch. I'm hungry. That Joey segment was brought to you by Manscaped. It was. Wait. R-rated.

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free shipping. All the shit I just talked about. It's fucking sweet. It was a good ad. It was a hell of an ad. Well, it's just because we support the people that support us. And Manscaped are fucking putting their full weight behind us. They said we want to prioritize

sons of boy dads. Because we're pushing units. Yeah. We move fucking merchandise. People fucking love our shit. And honestly, the women listeners can use the shit too. It's like when the broads sometimes use the Old Spice because it's just as strong as the secret that they're using. Or they'll drink the Pepsi for men just to see what it tastes like.

Dr. Pepper for men. I forgot they're making different Dr. Pepper for men. I think it got discontinued quick. Oh, Dr. Pepper for men. High test Dr. Pepper. I remember the first ad I saw and they were like, this is Dr. Pepper for men. You saw that old

ad of they used to McDonald's used to make a burger for adults. And it was like... The advertising was fucking terrible. It was like, spinach beats McDonald's burgers. Now something a little bit more grown up. What? I could see them having a burger that was more of a premium product.

And it's high end for the people like that want to like have a really like fancy burger experience or some shit like that but calling it for adults is stupid as fuck yeah or just that also why if you're going to McDonald's you don't want that or why would you lump it in with things that are like

people don't like because they're healthy and bad like this isn't going to be healthy burgers have had a weird that's basically just saying it's gonna suck remember when people used to put onions in burgers what are you about to say owen i think mcdonald's launched like a healthier option but it was just the same burger with lettuce and tomato i think jason alexander was the spokesman in it yeah that might have been it like they were using like a full thing of lettuce instead of shredded lettuce. Yeah. We're really doing

a lot of those deals for a while. Do they stop all those? Like McRibs or like Charlie D'Amelio meals? Charlie D'Amelio, the Travis patty, the Travi patty.

Harlow's got one at KFC right now. Shout out to fucking Harlow, bro. I was working at a Dunkin' when they made the Charlie stuff. It would kill me at like 20 years old at like three in the morning with like a bunch of girls would just be like, can I get the Charlie stuff. It would kill me at 20 years old at 3 in the morning with a bunch of girls. I'd just be like, can I get the Charlie? And I'd just be miserable.

Making Charlie after Charlie after the 17th. It's always just like a normal ass meal. It was a caramel swirl with milk. A.K.A. the most basic coffee of every single day. I'd make 500 Charlies. I'd just want to hang myself by the end of it. How much money do you think they get for that?

How much money do you think Charlie D'Amelio gets for that? Charlie's bitch ass probably got paid up front, dude. You think she got? I know. What do you think she got up front? First off, we haven't shit on them in a minute. Let's. Yeah.

Yeah. They probably have like. I have nothing to say. They really just like fell off. That's the biggest indictment. I mean, they don't do anything anymore. They probably just fell back from the spotlight because we roasted them so hard. I felt bad.

They were getting a lot of shit. From us. And in the arena shit, dude. Yeah. They were the ultimate woman in the arena. Yeah. No one knows what it's like. We said they fell off.

No one knows what it's like to be a sad man. Sad girl. Sad girl. Sad girl. One knows what it's like. They're probably still crushing it too and we just don't know. I don't think they are. Are they?

Aren't they? I don't think so. Damn. Well, maybe we could build them back up. I know Charlie got surpassed. We should give them a makeover. Wait, what do you mean she got surpassed? In followers.

Oh, no. Poor thing. Yeah, dude. Oh, fuck. So she's not the number one of all time anymore? over wait what do you mean she got surpassed in followers oh no poor thing yeah oh fuck so she's not the number one of all time anymore fuck sounds like she fell off dude you're not number one you're just like the fucking rest of us

even sass is number one at something yep number one fucking bitch idiot um say that I don't know how to correct myself it wasn't there was Yep. Number one fucking bitch idiot. Don't say that. I gotta correct myself. It wasn't, there was no burger. It was a McDLT, a McDonald's lettuce and tomato.

What the fuck is that? It's just lettuce and tomato. That's like kind of depressing because that's for people who are like like that that's a mental illness if you're buying that something is seriously wrong with you yeah go to the fucking grocery store didn't mcdonald's used to have like salads uh that were in like a cup like a cup of salad or some shit like that they have they had like a lobster roll for a bit didn't they like this was this was recent. Yeah. They might have that. Yeah. They still do that regionally.

Yeah. It's insane. That's fucking... Actually, I would probably buy it. I would probably try it, to be honest. Like what if it's just good? McDonald's level lobster? I feel like lobster is like the number one food

that has to be very fresh for you to be able to enjoy it. What if it's just good? What if it just tastes like a lobster roll? I don't know. And it's like five bucks. I'd be like, okay, let's do it. I'm going to have these every day. That shit ain't happening, dude. There's no way they could just make it.

Yeah, the mixed salad shakers, a fucking salad. That would be maybe one item I would look for a vegan option of, just a cheap-ass lobster replacement. That would be sweet. Isn't there like imitation crab sells really well and they're just like sticks of crab lobster dude lobster rolls are

insanely expensive it's fucking insane yeah they are I tried to uber eats one recently and it was like $70 if your paycheck goes to Jeffrey's grocery yeah dude some of our buddies go to Jeffrey's Grocery, which is like a West Village seafood spot.

Damn. And it is so expensive. What are some of your favorite types of fish? I don't know. I don't really eat a lot of fish. Dude, I had so much fucking fish this weekend. I had swordfish. I had halibut, branzino.

God. Yes, dude. Talk I had halibut, branzino. Yes, dude. Talk me through halibut. Halibut is fucking delightful, dude. Pretty thick, but it's flaky and you can get a nice crust to the outside. It goes with lots of different sauces. It's fucking lighter. I'm pretty sure I had a halibut sushi the other day.

Really? It was bad. Dang, bro. It must not have been last off the boat or last caught first off the boat. Definitely wasn't. All I eat is last caught first off the boat. I want to go fishing so bad. Yeah? You just can't afford it?

Where am I going to go fishing? The East River? People do it. People fucking fish in Central Park. Young page views used to catch behemoths in there. Really? Remember that big, the video of that like Goliath tuna that he had? That was in Central Park. Oh, have you seen this video of the fish with the face though?

Uh, no. Saw this shit on Reddit. Oh, it has like a normal human looking face? It's a human face. I feel like I have maybe seen this. It's horrifying. Some of them have like lips that look like they got fucking lip injections.

Yeah. Ew, dude. And there's a video of it moving. Look at this. Look at this shit. Oh, is TJ back? Yeah, TJ's putting on for the fucking city. Isn't that insane, dude? Oh, it's trying to evolve. Ew, dude, it looks like the Wizard

of Oz. It looks like the Mona Lisa. It looks like if you walk back and forth, the eyes would follow you. Oh, it's trying to evolve. Ew, dude. It looks like the Wizard of Oz. It looks like the Mona Lisa. It looks like if you walk back and forth, the eyes would follow you. Oh. That shit is creepy. That's fucking scary. It looks like Voldemort. Yeah. That shit doesn't...

Maybe it was Voldemort. I would not fuck that. No, I would not tap. I definitely would not want to see... There's got to be some sort of explanation to that, though. You wouldn't fuck that, right? No, no, no way. Would you?

Fuck it? No. I said I wouldn't. You're a fucking non-D1 ass. You D2 fuck. Yeah, you don't get any pussy. That's scary, dude. Imagine seeing that thing in the water.

I truly can't imagine it. I don't care how far it sets us back. What if it was like, what if it got parent trapped and swapped into the body from the body of a grown woman or something like that? I would just kill the fuck out of it.

What if you were killing the soul of fucking Ted Williams or John Hancock or Albert Einstein? Still, would it move on to Qaddafi? Yeah, what if it was Qaddafi? I'd fuck it. You'd fuck Qaddafi?

That's what would fuck Qaddafi. If it was Qaddafi, I would fuck it. Shut up fuck it? If that was Gaddafi, I would fuck it. Shut up, dude. No, bro. You know too much about politics, bro. You have to fucking stop, dude. Add that to your act. If that fish was Gaddafi, would you guys fuck it?

That's fucking edgy. That would have done better than my set last night. Yeah? Everyone was just going up there. I was throwing some real shit at them and they couldn't comprehend it yeah that's the problem that was coming up with real shit lately no i've been spitting facts honestly in truth because you're an edge lord now i'm an edge lord i'm a truth lord no but i will say you've gravitated gravitated towards more of like a bastion of truth like a modern philosopher that's what i'm going

for dude as a comedian we have to be philosophers yeah look people look to us to tell the truth when no one else will that that is a fact literally like that's your art or actually like that that is your art yeah that's why people want applause that's how fucking dude i think we're just trying to make people laugh. No, dude. No, dude. They want us to- People laugh at the truth. People come here to get away.

To get away and hear the truth. Universal truth that nobody fucking- That's why I like to police what other people say. If they're not telling a universal truth, I fucking cancel it. Don't say it, bro. Dumbass. If you don't have anything universal truth to tell,

don't say anything at all. I'll beat the fuck out of someone for trying to lie about a universal truth um you were funny as fucking most dangerous game show bro yeah go check that out that's gonna be really good the first episode that i watched like uh even when i showed it to other people beforehand um they're just laughing at what you said so much it's like everything you said was funny as fuck so that's tight man and i appreciate and i appreciate that i just want you to know in this sea of people telling you that you don't have life experience yeah stupid opinions don't always say that that much anymore i know because they know you have

life experiences now you just have no excuse yeah you caught up to those guys in New Hampshire real quick on life experience oh yeah I know yeah I don't know say it bro stop stifling your universal truths brody I was a philosopher you I'm not have to work on this you have you are a philosopher

find those words now I need to you're a philosopher raptor. How long have we been going, TJ? A little over an hour. TJ, do you have any fucking shit you want to plug and get off your chest? Watch the college football show this year. TJ's going to be a... Pro football show.

Oh, pro? Yeah. Oh, big leagues. What? Pro football. You won? Big leagues, big leagues. Yeah. I'll be a suit in no time. Oh, big leagues. What? Pro football. You got called into the big leagues big league. Yeah.

I'll be a suit in no time. Fuck off, dude. Oh, man. Well deserved. We're lucky we have you while we do, Teej. I love being here. Salute to fucking- I'm a boy dadder.

Are you? Hell yeah, brother. Yo, what, dude? Give TJ Hitchings a follow on fucking all platforms. Shout your Twitch out, bro. I haven't streamed in six months. TJ Lemao. TJ Lemao.

Damn. Fuck yeah. Yo, Sass, let's wrap this up. Let's recreate the video of Fousey getting slapped in the stomach with a stick. Did you say Fousey? Yeah. It's Fousey. His name.

A word? It's Fousey. Oh, fuck. You dumbass. Now I'm never gonna get to do a prank video with him. I don't understand those videos because it's like, what's the point? I've seen it go viral on like every type of account. It comes up on my Instagram

every day. And it's always like the one guy going and he's like, and then all of a sudden the music changes and it's like and then Fousey walks on screen. He's just looking. See, he's the type of dude who pivoted from making comedy to telling universal truths. He's just trying to be hot and have dramatic music behind his shit.

He's trying different shit and I appreciate Fousey for that. Yeah, it's a good plan B. Why? If I ever really started sucking, I would start doing a lot of drugs, a lot of hard drugs, and then I would get sober. And then the next thing you'd see me up on stage somewhere and I'd be like, the reason that we have not progressed as men is still we're still associating with these substances. You have to be sober. Hard times make weak men. Yeah.

It's all about Ativan. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's literally like and then you become like a billionaire. Yeah. It is crazy. Ativan is the softest one too.

I know. Ativan barely does it. I would have to quit Zoloft too and then I would leave I would leave a pack of people that are on SSRIs. You have to ramp up a couple levels. Yeah. Then quit. Yeah. Like I would have to have like if I ever if you ever see me and I'm going nuts.

I go insane. Everyone's like oh my God. Sass said the lowest of his low. You have no idea what's next. Yeah. Forced trauma is the only way that people who have like inherent success can get to the next level of success and I'm going to get they're not ready you're gonna force some heavy fucking trauma on your

own bitch ass and that is not ready little Sasquatch promise all right to wrap it up yeah should we wrap it up no no I say that I think I feel like we should wrap it up now let's wrap it up want to wrap it up thanks guys we'll see you next week.

Watch the most dangerous game show. Peace.