Son of a Boy Dad - Son of a Boy Dad: Ep. 78 - Ali Macofsky

Episode Date: September 13, 2022

Son of a Boy Dad: Ep. 78 - Ali Macofsky -- Lil Sas & Rone are joined by Ali Macofsky: a hilarious stand-up comedian of KissFM, Kill Tony, Joe Rogan, & JFL New Faces fame -- We discuss NY vs. LA comedy, Australian dick appointments, kids with divorced parents, ADHD, Jean-Michel Basquiat, prank calls, subways, ubers, sex tapes, & more -- Full episode also available on YouTube, thanks for listening/watching!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, son of a boy dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. We good to go? How do I make my... It's one of these. Do I have to wear them or are you doing no? Okay, I'm going to raw dog it. Yeah, I'm not going to wear them either.

I just like the sound of my own voice. I know, it is nice. Even though my voice is terrible. Sounds like a woodwind instrument. I don't think so. I think, wait, talk a little bit. This is my voice, the sound of my voice. That's nice.

It's kind of like the pitch is wrong. If I could kind of pitch correct my voice. There's a little something off with it, but it's not bad to listen to. I sound like a little kid playing detective. Someone told me that one time. That's pretty good. What does your voice sound like? Me?

Yeah, you have a good voice. You have like a cartoon voice. Yeah, he does. You have a Pixar-ass voice. Yeah, he does. I say that voice. He used to do a thing where he would ask everything like a question. Or he would say everything like a question.

But he doesn't do it anymore. I broke out of it. It was his calling card. It became like a thing where I would like hear yourself doing it and be like I hate myself. It actually wasn't even like that. It was like I would hang out with my friends from home. That's where I got it from. Where are you from? Massachusetts. It's not a Massachusetts thing at all. Just your friends?

It's just like one of my friends did it throughout all of high school. And then we all picked up on it. Yeah. And then I like her. I like hung out with him. And we were probably in like Nashville for the first time in a while. And I heard him doing it. I was like, dude, this is like really annoying.

And so because I think it was based on his own insecurity because he would be like, I didn't want to say things definitively. It was ruining jokes, too. Because I would get like excited to tell a joke and then I would like my voice would start getting higher and higher. I think that is like I feel like a lot of like alternative comics adapted that style

of speaking as well. Oh yeah. I remember like back in the day doing open mics and there was like a trend of people doing the like high pitch at the end and it's almost like and this is where the joke goes there was this dude that I and laugh now

if I don't say it like this I'm gonna bomb there was this kid oh and remember that time with that kid that we saw do the open mic a couple times yeah yeah yeah with like the Seinfeld voice yeah he would start off but then he'd be like at the end he'd be like like so high

pitch. But he was very funny. I actually wonder what he's up to now. Are there hacks? Yeah, he's a dead man. Are there hacks to how you can say, just say things that like, I feel like I've seen like comic hacks of like, you just say a joke a certain way. There's just like certain ways that you can like say the punchline

or just like little like tags you could throw on be like so there's that like just like that's actually one thing that pisses me off because you see people do it and like it's stomping on their own jokes yeah like when instantly the punchline hits and they're like okay anyway and it's like dude like you didn't even give them a chance

to laugh so I'm single like he's telling the most to laugh so I'm single yeah yeah yeah like he's telling the most foul story so I'm single of course you are you loser

yeah yeah it's um it's a big thing that people do though when I was in Atlanta someone I saw was doing that and it was like

the jokes were funny but it was like they would just end the joke and every single time they just go anyway and it's like dude you're killing but it was like they would just end the joke and every single time they just go anyway and it's like dude you're killing your own joke something that's happening a lot now that I feel like I'm guilty of I'll

notice it and I'll be like fucking stupid bitch is um a lot of people say you know now like whether it's even like just regular people in conversation or whatever but a lot of time on stage a lot of people will say you know i'm you know and i've been doing that and i've been trying to stop myself i've been going i go i don't know

after every single joke i said yeah i don't know and then i continue something else yeah and then i'm like dude this is making me sound like i like don't think any of this is like working yeah and like the whole point of comedy is like the illusion of confidence yeah yeah you're just breaking that down you're like i actually don't know anything someone like after illusion of confidence. You're just breaking that down. You're like, I actually don't know anything. Someone like after one of my shows this week, they were like, dude, like this joke was really funny. Like, I wish you didn't say, I don't know after. Oh, wow. Even the audience caught on.

Is that how it came to you? Damn. There's a fuck. What was I going to say? What were we just talking about? Confidence. Confidence, yeah. The illusion of confidence.

Is LA comedy like, I imagine it's a lot of confidence, right? People, from what I've heard, people get real physical on stage in LA. Yeah, yeah. There's definitely a lot of, I feel like in LA there's a lot more like style and performance to it. Do you notice how like the big difference between that? Like in New York, there's a lot of people that play this character where they hate. They're like,

I don't even want to be doing this. I'm so fucking stupid. Leg up against the wall. Yeah, totally. The cool guy comic. You do this every single night five times a night. You want to be doing this. Why are you pretending that you're in pain on stage yeah it's like a weird kink of theirs yeah i don't

even want to do this yeah but they're all but i can't stop um yeah no there's definitely like the cool guy comics in la who are like oh you guys didn't like that yeah whatever i don't need this yeah like a lot of there's so many like it's so crazy because before I started doing comedy I would go to all these shows and it was all uh it was also like magical to me but now that I see so much comedy and I'm like in it you can just kind of like see behind the curtain of like there's just so many like lines that are so common like people doing the well I already got paid to do the show so I don't care if you guys like me or not oh yeah that's so

dumb yeah and it's like you care yeah well so why would like that be like such a mean thing to say to the crowd yeah you guys already paid me mine's already in my pocket it's just a defense mechanism yeah start the show let's start the show are we recording I think that was recording right

is that for Patreon or it's the exclusive we wanted to do Patreon but they won't let us we gotta give all our money to our daddies at Barstool we're like little

little street workers out here don't nevermind I was gonna make such a dumb joke no what was the joke I was gonna say

don't call her daddy but no that plays any even small reference to call her daddy they'll like clip it and use it on our main Instagram still just like are they back yeah desperate to get any clicks even off the words call her daddy put together that's so funny yeah we're big call her daddy fans yeah we love that

well yeah both of them in its purest form i like to call her daddy i still like it now but i loved it when it was the gals together i never listened to to it, ever. Did you ever listen to it? Not even once? Not even the first ep? You just know what it is as a cultural touchstone? But you know what is funny? When they were trying to find I think there was like some post or something about like two female podcast hosts for Barstool. My sisters

were like, Ally, you have to submit for this. Really? Yeah, and I was just like, i don't think i have the personality to be a barstool gal but all you have to do is talk about um like just like sex whether you've had it or not like you just have to talk like an expert like and you have to yeah you have to know everything about sex everything yeah and if you don't pretend you do and people will believe you okay i can do that but then it backfired that backfired on call her daddy because then everyone was like i was listening to these girls and like now my ex-boyfriend wants has a restraining order against me like their advice uh that people

called them to a mental facility yeah no people called them like misogynists because they're giving bad advice like well why are you guys listening to them are you listening to their advice yeah it's also like the same thing when people get like yeah just any any any celebrity or famous person it's like why do why are we following no yeah most of them are pretty out of touch and yeah yeah they're just making it up but there is a new like we have a new podcast that kind of talks about sex and they're like obliterating us on the charts like they're blowing us out of the water why don't we make this episode all about boning yeah yeah yeah

we've tried we just can't speak knowledgeably cause you guys aren't good at it it falls flat badly every single time should we say her name yeah they are have we actually not started no we have but we have

is it a soft start all i have to do is just yeah okay all right what's up everybody welcome back to son of a boy dad podcast today it is september 12th monday 3 30 p.m today we're joined by guest ali mckoski hell yeah thanks for coming Thanks for having me. Thanks for saying my last name correctly. Oh, of course. Yeah. Do people fuck it up? Yeah, they fuck it up a lot.

They like add letters. How do they fuck it up? I feel like that's like such an easy. McCloskey. McCloskey? Or McCowski. McCowski, I could say. No, I couldn't.

It's pronounced, it's written out as McCoskey. Yeah. I saw one spelling of your name where the O was capitalized though. Yeah, people really want me to be Irish. Makovsky. Makovsky. Try and just switch it up just to see what happens. Capitalize though. Yeah.

I don't think it would make a huge difference in my life. When they bring you up on stage it could change things a lot. When I was first doing like open mics, kind of like what you said before the pod, people would just see my name on a piece of paper to call me up and they'd be like Ali Makovsky.

Which first of all is just like two of the most crazy names together. Like Ali and Makovsky just are not in the same family at all. Pakistani-Scottish mix up. But then they would see me and I'm like not an Ollie. That's not Ollie.

Yeah. Where the fuck is Ollie at? It's me. Yeah. It's a whole. Look, how do you guys know each other? How, how do you, uh, how did you come to be here on son of a boy dad podcast? Um, I met Ali at the stand like a year ago probably.

Um, yeah, I think it was like one of my last trips here. Yeah. And then we, uh, did Moon Tower together as well have you noticed any growth in little Sasquatch's stand up comedy in your time probably in like 8 months but I'm gonna say yeah that's a good answer

actually I don't even know if you've ever seen it go up have you at Moon Tower when I was just fucking bringing the roof down you were it was an 8-minute set. I mean, come on. Yeah, we're super supportive of his dreams on this. We like to stoke the fires.

Yes, we blow into the fire and try to get some fuel. It was great because we were walking down 6th Street in Austin, and so many people were like, oh, my God, Sasquatch. And it's always like, my boyfriend loves you. Just the most drunk girls being like, babe, come here. It's Sas. And the guy's like, I don't even know who that is. All right.

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So you put in BOYDAD149. And head on down to Every Plate, baby. Where the food is good. Thank you. Back to the show. I did feel weird. I walked in here and I've never, I don't know you well enough to where I've had to say your God-given name many times. Oh, yeah.

So when I got to the front desk, I was like, how do I? Oh, yeah. They don't even know my real name. I know. They'd be like, no, he doesn't work here. I was like, I'm here for Harry's podcast. And they're like, who is that? And I was like, Sasquatch?

It is a dumb ass name. It rocks. No, it sucks. I hate it. But as a person who has to say it out loud, I'm like, I don't like this. I want to not use that anymore, but I'm too far in. Wait, didn't they tell you one year ago not to use that? They've been telling me for a while not to use it. Why? Every single

comedian I've talked to has been like, dude, don't. What are you doing? Oh, like on stage? Yeah. But it's like I can't like sell tickets. Yeah. What am I? Yeah. Can you do like can you do one of those like double names like Harry, a.k.a. Yeah.

I've done that before. A.k.a. Young hot boy. A.k.a. I've thought about doing that or I have done that before. But then it's like I like I don't look at I just don't want to have to make the host like memorize this paragraph to bring it up. Yeah. And Little Sasquatch is it's like I just don't want to have to make the host memorize this paragraph to bring it up. And Little Sasquatch, it's memorable.

Yeah, but it also like every time I see it. It's too memorable. Yeah, you're only remembered for your name and not for your jokes at all. And also it throws people off. It throws people off. I didn't mean that. I was joking with you. It throws people off when I get brought up and they're like,

who the fuck is about to walk up on stage and then it's me yeah and they're like oh well i guess for for the purpose of selling tickets little sasquatch is good but then like when you go on i don't know yeah what a tough position i know he's too fucking famous didn't you originally do it to like protect your family or something like that you would like some it's all to protect my some. Some fakely noble reason. You're not noble. I did it because I started tweeting when I was in high school, like 9th grade or 8th grade.

And I was going to go to college. And you never said any F'd up S on there? No, I did. That's why I didn't use my real name. What kind of S did you say? A lot of bad shit. I was a bad boy. What kind of S did you say? A lot of bad shit. No, you didn't. I was a bad boy.

What kind of stuff have you deleted? Nothing. My tweets were so stupid. Yeah, my tweets were dumb as fuck. Roan, on the other hand, I mean, you don't even want to do the deep dive on him. Yeah, but I don't delete. I stand by it as well. Really?

Yeah. I burned my Twitter down. All of it? Roan should. Roan should. I need a fresh start. I keep it a buck. Dude, I said what I down. All of it? I need a fresh start. I keep it a buck. Dude, I said what I said.

I was out here living. I was out here for a fucking minute. You got rid of all your stuff? Yeah, I guess. Or you went through and picked buzzwords? My Twitter was never hot enough for me to be like, oh, this is tough. I was like, burn it down. Really? Yeah. I feel like that be like, oh, this is tough. I was like, burn it down. Really?

Yeah. I feel like that's like ripping up a diary, though. I feel like there's like a part of you in there. But mine wasn't a good diary. It would never get published. There would never be a deal on that diary. Not even just for you? Add a few bangers, I'm sure.

Yeah, just a good couple pages of the diary. Yeah. That's sad, though. I feel like it's like burning up your childhood like, childhood, like, toys and shit like that. Or maybe you've got to get rid of that. You got to grow up. Yeah, I guess you got to grow up at some point.

Thank you for your service. Nothing's permanent. I just saw that. I should definitely change my name. This is making me think about it. No, no, no, no. Got to grow up one day. Such a fucking loser.

I wish, I used to, my, like, Twitter or Instagram or whatever it was, like, my username in middle school and high school was Versace Lettuce. Oh, but that's a sick ass name. And it was so cool. And I wish I, I wish I. That's like Little Sasquatch. That's like the same vein. You should start going up and be like, you guys know her from Twitter, Versace Lettuce.

Sounds like a rap name, Loki. Well, it was at that time where like people would have stupid names. It would be like Gucci hot dog. Oh, yeah. And I was like, I'm Versace lettuce. Brianna chicken fry. Yeah, that's why I did my name because it was like all the people on Twitter. It was like Bill Ratchet, Big Tan, one of young domestic abuse.

That was one guy. It was like everyone, no one's using their real names. Yeah. And also I was like still going to go to college. So I didn't want it coming back to my name. you end up going to college i went for like a semester and dropped out yeah i got a job at school wasn't for me i knew i was more of a creative the stool was the stool was yeah you're one of those guys who's like well steve jobs actually yeah zuckerberg actually dropped out so you should be good it's so funny when people do that and i'm

like so what are you doing and they're like i'm selling weed i'm like just like same job yeah yeah you got the entrepreneur in you it's a whole different fucking bag of tricks for them but you i mean it was a good decision by you to get out of college did you go to college i also went for like a month what were you gonna be what else were you gonna do with your life i mean i knew i wanted to i had done one open mic before going to college. So I ultimately knew I was going to do that. But I was like, I'll study political science while I'm here. I mean, I didn't. I dropped out so quickly. With the intent to do what? Like protest by your junior year? I went to one or I watched I watched some movie where they were talking about like the the logistics or like the analytics of how a president should appear.

Like they should wear shoes that are a little bit worn and scuffed, but still like nice and presentable. And for some reason, I was like, that's political science. Like, I don't even know what job that is, but I'm like, I want to know the things. What the fuck is going on outside right now? Dress a president. Sounds like a siren. Yeah. It's loud as fuck.

I saw something crazy. What was it? Something wild happened. Oh, there was a woman smoking on the train last night. It was incredible. Smoking kush? Just smoking a cig. Smoking Zaza?

I started smelling some cig smoke and I was like, is my mom in New York? And then I looked over and it was this lady fully just like smoking a cigarette. And I was like, that is me. Are you staying in Manhattan right now? I'm staying in Manhattan. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. Because taking the train to Brooklyn or back from Brooklyn late at night gets like, because

eventually everyone will get off and then just the people that are going to Brooklyn are on. And then it's like you and you and two people for 30 minutes. Tyler, do you ever get that? No. Yeah? You're just chilling? Hell yeah.

He's the one they should be scared of. He's smoking cigs on the train. Yeah, that's true. Tyler definitely is smoking up on the train. He's just going to lit the fuck up on the train. Tell skinny white guys you were scary. Yeah. It's like, stop.

Wait, but why, though? Tyler's a scary motherfucker. I don't know. There's just something. You just got so much length, so much wingspan. I don't know there's just something you just got so much length so much wingspan I don't know he could grab you up and not even be close to you

yeah that's true he's got reach he could be on the other side of the train and just fucking snatch you he could push the fuck out of you

strong push wind up I just feel like guys you could like flip a switch and then just be like crazy and you don't see it coming. Damn. He's a mean motherfucker. Yeah.

You don't want to fuck around. He's actually security. That's the only reason that he's in here. We didn't know what kind of tricks you were going to pull. I pulled some tricks. He whips ass from a distance. So there was a dude who was just blowing the fucking, I guess it's not bad if it's just a vape, but just like smoking, smoking anything on a train is a fucking crazy

move. It's just a preposterous move. Just treating shared space like it's your own space. I guess that's the fucking city. I don't think I've ever seen someone like fully like smoke something. Yeah. I'd never seen it before. It was incredible.

It's a pretty wild move, but I guess like at, I don't know, a certain time, it's like, well, the fuck? No one's going to do anything. Like there's like you could do anything on the train. Like, no, what do they do? Yeah, I don't know. I was getting off as soon as I noticed that she was smoking a cigarette. But it was like at the time where you could start smelling it. So I could just see everyone looking around.

And I wanted to stay on the train so bad just to see how it unfolded, but I didn't have the time for it. One time I fell, have you, one of my first times in New York, I was taking the train, which is like such a foreign experience being someone from Southern California. Oh yeah. There's no public transport. There's no public transport. And I was like, I'm very like, I'm staring at my phone, making sure I'm going the right way. I'm on the right train, you know, all of that. And I was so tired. It was late at night and I fell asleep and ended up like somewhere near like Coney Island. Oh Jesus. And my phone was at like five my phone was at like 5%. It's like two in the morning or three in the morning or something.

And I was just stranded. Did you have to get like an Uber or what? So I got an Uber because I'm like, my phone's not going to last for me to find my way back home. So I like ordered an Uber. I'm standing on the street corner and my phone dies. And so I'm just wait. I'm like, I'm praying they don't cancel on me. I'm praying. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've had some close calls like that. Oh, because I'm like, then I'm just stuck. Yeah, yeah. That's the thing that's nice about New York. I become the woman smoking on the train at that point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're just lost. Yeah. The good thing about New York is if your phone dies, you can still get a cab.

Oh, yeah. That's the move in New York. But this was like in such a weird area where I was like in an alleyway. Like there wasn't there was no life around. No, no, no. Yeah. It's a nightmare. That kind of is a nightmare to be like in a in a deep corner of New York with nowhere to go No, no, no. Yeah. It's a nightmare. That kind of is a nightmare to be like in a, in a deep corner of New York

with nowhere to go. Like no, no option for an escape from that area of New York. Yeah. It's easy as fuck to get lost on the subway too. I still,

like to this day, I'll get on the train and like, it'll just pass my street and I'll end up in like Fidei. And then I'm just like, I'm just like, what the fuck?

I don't use the subway or I don't use public transit in other cities because I know it's just going to my ass i know i'm just gonna get so lost i'm gonna wind up going the wrong way or i have to ask someone for directions and shit like that i'm too insecure as it is to have to do i mean la is pretty tough like for not having a car out there like do you have a car i'm assuming yeah but there was a period where i didn't have a car for like two years i crashed my car in a blackout. Oh, hell yeah.

Wait, what do you mean? The energy was out? Or you were blacked out drunk? I was blacked out drunk, yeah. Legend. You got arrested or no? No. Oh, you're.

Did you bail? You left the car? No. I mean, this is like such a when people like white privilege is not a thing. I'm like yeah i should have gone to jail because i was fully blacked out i was fully blacked out i like don't remember starting my car at all yeah and do you remember crashing it oh yeah oh yeah that sobers you up as soon as you hit the center divider on the freeway you're like

it's like a cocaine bump. You're like, I'm ready to go. I could drive right now. Yeah, no, she truly, I was like, let's go. But it was tote. My car was totaled. So I could not drive away. And it's like, I think three in the morning or four in the morning. And so I start calling my mom, my dad, my sister is like trying to get advice on what to do. No one's answering. I call my sister's like trying to get advice on what to do no one's answering i call my sister's roommate she picks up i'm like i need to talk to my sister and my sister's like i told my sister i was like i was drinking and i just crashed my car i guess i didn't sound that fucked up because she was like just chew gum drink water if the cops come like don't tell them you were drinking i do not say you were drinking so i'm like okay but i only had one of the things. I either had water or I had

gum. I didn't have both. So I'm just either sipping away or chewing away. And the highway patrol comes to move my car. Yeah. And I start crying, you know. Oh, yeah. Power move. I was like, I'm a comedian. I work late hours.

I'm so tired. It's fucked up saying it. Cause I like seriously could have hurt someone. Um, luckily I didn't, but it is. Um, what if I just admit, I was like, I killed two people. Um, you know, we all have our time. Everything happens for a reason. Did you consciously cry?

Were you like, oh, this cop's coming? I think I, I wasn't crying because I felt bad. It was like I was crying because I knew that that would help me. And also I was like, my fucking car's totaled. Yeah, that sucks. And I've told this story before, but this was the second car that I had totaled in a month. Oh, shit. I had bought myself.

Was the other one you were drunk too? No, I was dick drunk, but not like alcohol drunk. Which could be worse. Hell yeah. It's more dangerous. But dick drunk for me, yeah, it alcohol drunk. Which could be worse. Hell yeah. It's more dangerous. But dick drunk for me, yeah, it was a weird time in my life. I was like making an illegal U-turn to park in front of this hostel where I was going to bone an Australian guy.

And I got T-boned right in front of the hostel. By the Australian guy? Yeah. Yeah. And then after I got T-boned,bone i had the the wait what did you say i missed he's like australians have big dicks i don't even know if they do i missed my chance i didn't even get to hook up you didn't get to fuck no because so here's how crazy it was i crashed my car right in front of the hostel i wanted to meet up with this australian guy

and also like boning in a hostel like there's multiple rooms they're always there they're always there they're everywhere they travel they get around yeah but then it's like I would have been boning him in a room with like seven other people wouldn't be the first time anyway that might have been more unethical than the blackout drunk car

crash yeah maybe there's just like a group of like homeless children in the corner yeah or hot Australian dudes you really never know what if it's all hot australian dudes in there but i crashed this car it was brand new i bought it with cash bought this car and four days after i crashed it in front of the hostel the airbags go off it's totaled i have this giant welt on my forehead is this from the t-bone or the drunk driving this from the t-bone for the dick and um and my sister's like i'm gonna pick you up and i was like oh no i have to meet up with my friends i have this huge welt on my forehead anyway she picked me up so then i get the car back because i totaled a brand new car so i got the money back for what the value

was which was brand new so i bought the same car but this time i got it in the color white because i'm like if it's white everyone will be able to see it it's a bright color and then i crashed in a blackout 28 days later yeah but the highway patrol came they moved my car they saw it they probably picked up on it quick they were like thank god it's white this was so easy it's wrapped around the tree dead of night we would never have been able to sign this and is so easy to find. It's wrapped around a tree. Dead of night. We would never have been able to find this. And the flames shooting out of the side. But yeah, they put me in the back of the car and they were like, okay, we believe your story, I guess, these idiots.

Yeah. So it was the cops, right? Yeah, it was Highway Patrol. They're like more serious than cops. Like they're more down to like, do they have top hats? No, that would be cool if they did though.

It's like some kind of wide brimmed hat though. No, no kind of cool hats. I feel like that's kind of immoral. I think that's state troopers. Yeah. That's state troopers. Oh,

I'm thinking state troopers. If I was drunk and they were wearing top hats, I would have been like, let me wear it. That's so cute. You should have asked if you'd shot their gun. Shoot their gun. I'm sure they would have let you.

I mean, the car's already totaled. You could have just blown that thing up. Let's just have fun while we're here. They couldn't be cool about it one time. Yeah. I'm surprised that you didn't still try and link up with the Australian dude, though, if you were like right outside the hostel. Well, I texted them. I was like.

Them? There was multiple? Yeah yeah i think there was two i mean i wouldn't have done it at the same time but back to back for sure um dealer's choice really but um you guys figure it out amongst yourselves yeah um but uh but that if you're like bloody like stumbling into the hostel you really test that could have been the start to like a good like romance yeah I mean Australians get here Australians party hard so I don't even

think they would have been affected oh no they would have been like let's go the whiplash scene but for a dick appointment oh yeah just like stumbling yeah I think I texted them after I was like so hey guys something came up

they're looking out their window is that you just getting carried away in the stretcher yeah something came up I'm pretty slammed tonight pretty busy it was also they were they were at a different hostel it wasn't even the right hostel i went to the wrong hostel yeah damn and you're sober yeah fully sober you really needed that australian dick i guess so i was so yeah i was very despo

back back then back then hell yeah real des. Back then. Now you're rich though. Yeah. Yeah. You don't drink, do you? I don't drink anymore. Was that when you stopped drinking? It should have been. Yeah. My sisters were like, you have a problem.

That's not normal. And I'm like, yeah, it is. I felt like crashing your car in a blackout is like a... It's a rite of passage. Yeah. I was like, you get your license, you blackout, you crash your car. Like it's just part of life. But they were like, you need to take a break.

And I was like, I don't know about that. But I tried taking a break, didn't do it. And then I was like, oh, maybe this is a little darker than I thought. Hell yeah. How long have you been off the sauce? Off the sauce. Like almost seven years. Oh, hell yeah. But I do Kratom every morning. Do you really? No. That would be sick. But there are a lot of like,

California sober type people. Yeah. Like sober people who like rock hard for the Kratom. We work with one of them. It's so wild. He tells everyone. He's like, I am coming up on two years sober. He's like, dude, weren't you doing whippets last night? Yeah. There was this one dude who's sober from everything but Kratom and me and my boyfriend were at his place. And my boyfriend hasn't seen this guy in so long. And they used to do heroin and shit together.

Oh, really? And the guy's like, I'm doing much better now. He comes out of the bathroom. He has Kratom like all around his mouth like he just ate like donuts yeah yeah yeah like it was just homer simpson vibes yeah yeah yeah raw powder yeah i don't even know how he was doing yeah how do you take how do you take a buddy we have a buddy who works here who did who went through a big kratom phase and it was when he was not drinking right he was trying to get yeah he was doing like a 50 day no drinking thing and he got like really into Kratom yeah and it was

way more detrimental to his health than alcohol oh for sure how do you take it is it um there's multiple different forms can you like you mix it in a bev yeah he was taking little shooters like five hour energies like a vegetable replacement smoothie type of thing it was like uh there was like a reddit where people were talking about Kratom

right yeah and the guy was like some guy like, I just took a full vial. This is stronger than any heroin I've ever had. Oh my God. And Hugh at the time was doing like two vials like a day. Jesus. But can you overdose on Kratom? Can you overdose like heroin on Kratom? I don't know what Kratom is.

I don't think so. I think Kratom's like- I think you can get like a really bad tummy ache. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So- Isn't it just like CBD, but like for heroin instead? Yeah. It's like a CBD version of opioids.

Yeah. But you can overdose. I think you can. I think it. I think it can cause like, like, I think you can get like a really bad headache. Like, it'll fuck you up. Like, you won't feel good at all. Yeah.

It feels like something. It sounds like something that would just make you feel terrible. Yeah. But it's better than heroin. But when it you get a vial and a half you gotta try your boyfriend should never have quit heroin he he should keep that shit out everybody i know that doesn't loves it they're obsessed i had a dream that i did heroin recently and i remember being like did it once and i was like dude that i did heroin recently and i remember being like did it once and i was like dude this is the shit yeah and i wanted to keep doing it yeah it does seem like it rocks and i was like oh fuck i'm not doing heroin but dude i'm never

touching that shit that dream fuck after your dream explaining your dreams to people is like the most dumb shit if like i don't even know why like it's was, what were you guys going to get out of me telling you that, that I did heroin in my dream? Well, also there's something like, damn, that's really cool, dude.

It's an interesting story. You can, no one can ever explain a dream the way that it felt. Cause dreams are so like feelings based. So when you're trying to explain it, there's like, but you, you had to be there.

Yeah. Yeah. That's like the ultimate. You had to be there. And it's like like you don't even know half of the shit that happened because like i never remember my dreams i'll have like a super fucked up dream and then i'll wake up and i'll have no idea what it was about yeah yeah damn i don't know we got to get back into your dreams maybe it's like repressed memories you think so shit you think i was doing heroin like a long time ago I don't remember. Giving out foot jobs? Maybe it's resentment towards your family. It could be, dude.

Making you keep the name Lil Sasquatch. To protect them. What does your family do? They're like dock workers. You're like, what the fuck? Now, some people found my full name, though. And then this dude was like, this is why.

It would be better if I just came in with it, not like I didn't, everyone knew my name. Cause then no one would give a fuck about what my name is. Yeah. But then it's like. But there's the fun of the hunt. And this dude was like tweeting at me and my dad. Your dad's on Twitter?

Like, no. Yeah, he is. And he gets off spicy takes. No, my dad gets off no takes. No, they're mild. And they were like tweeting at my dad and they were being like they were like i went to this this this guy's house and him and his dad were calling me the n-word like all this shit and it was like just a burner account just like making shit up and like tweeting at like my dad's like co-workers and stuff oh my god and i've told

my dad a hundred times like you need to be private on twitter and then he like will like make himself on private because he like likes the attention and i'm like will like make himself on private because he likes the attention. And I'm like, what are you doing? Are your parents still married? Yeah. Oh, damn. But your parents are divorced as fuck, right? Oh, so divorced.

Oh, yeah. Couldn't be more divorced. Did you have my mom? She's on like she's on Instagram. She used to be. She might still have a Twitter account. It's very inactive, but my mom will do the thing. She also kind of loves...

She'll like... My mom... I opened for Russell Peters a few times and when all the stuff about Louis was coming out, Louis C.K., my mom tweeted at Russell Peters saying, at Russell Peters,

in light of all the news, I just want to thank you for being so nice and generous to my daughter and I was like mom what are you doing what the fuck is this did he like show it to you or did you just see it I think she showed it to me

that's fucked yeah and sometimes she'll like she'll DM like comics that I'm friends with and she'll be like she'll dm like comics that i'm friends with and she'll be like whenever you're back in la would love to make dinner for you oh that's crazy i had to be like mom you gotta you gotta cut it off but there's a decent amount of people in here whose parents like are like they have active twitter accounts and you'll like uh they're co-workers of ours but you'll see their parents tweeting and i think they just realize how easy it is like Their dumbass kid has

100,000 followers. They might as well get some takes off. They might as well troll a little bit online. People's parents? Multiple parents in here have like, we hired someone's mom. No way. Yeah, someone's mom works in here. She's great too. She's awesome. Oh, that's so sick.

She makes us cocktails on Friday. So there's hope for your mom. It's really good. Yeah. I'll have to get her out here. You think she wants to work here? Yeah. Yeah, we should hire her.

We should bring in your mom. We should put her at the reception desk. Dude, you had the one bit on your Instagram talking about how your dad could do anything and you'll have the longest leash with your dad, but your mom will just do the smallest thing you'll be like fuck mom you're ruining my life yeah the fuck mom it's so messed up i feel like um a lot of women are like that with their moms they'll just like guys aren't i i don't think dudes because i mean there's a whole mama's boy thing that goes on with dudes and their moms you know what i mean but i think that there's like uh i think it depends i think it depends on the relationship your parents

have because I think observing your parents interact with each other really like like affects how you view your parents so I felt like growing up my dad would talk a lot of shit about my mom and so then I kind of had this like bro

dad attitude where I'm like yeah she is a bitch like I'm just like yeah, she is a bitch. I'm just like such a misogynist because I grew up with my dad. I'm like, yeah, women are objects. My parents got divorced when I was like five. And my dad had like, for the most part, I went back and forth, but mostly had like primary custody. So I spent a lot of time with him and it was like I was just his bro yeah so he'd just be like having lunch or something after school cracking a beer a hot girl would walk by and he'd like turn his back and so i'm like just like pat

you on the arm like you see that that's funny as hell that's hilarious is it uh did you from the rip in comedy start talking about like your family dynamics and stuff like that or like your parents need divorce? Or were you like, I got to start talking about this shit? No, no. I'm only like recently trying to talk more about my family and stuff, because I think when I first started, it was at the time in my life when I was crashing my cars for Australian dick. vindict so a lot of my stuff in the beginning was just more like sexual and it still is but it's definitely like becoming a little bit more um uh intertwined with like other things get to the root of it nobody funnier than someone whose parents are divorced though it makes it makes people way funnier i think having parents that are split up or at least

like hate each other yeah i think you just like get such a different perspective well it's also yeah i don't know there's so a different perspective well it's also yeah i don't know there's so many especially at comedy clubs so many people go on dates there and so having parents who are divorced like i look at all these couples at the comedy show and in my head i'm like you're only going here because you guys can't talk to each other anymore yeah yeah like you guys are so sick of it like my view on relationships is so messed up i'm like you guys are breaking up soon. Like,

this is a last ditch effort to bring like joy and happiness. Yeah, you're enjoying this show together. Like, it's a wrap for you too. It does make sense though

because it's like you go to a comedy show together they don't have to talk to each other for like two hours and then they like have something to talk about afterwards. Yeah. Yeah.

You think that's why people do that though? No, I'm sure there's plenty of happy people who like a comic or like just like going to comedy shows.

But I think it does also just like. I don't know, I think you see so much more like dark shit at a young age. If your parents get divorced, you like see a lot of adult stuff that you normally wouldn't. So you start looking at things from like a much older perspective, maybe. Or like if you have a happy family your entire life, you have no need for like ever to have escapism or even a good imagination. You just like live in the present. You just live in the

moment. It's just like, oh, mom loves each other, dad loves each other. I don't care about Cinderella or some fucking Disney story. I'm already living in it. Yeah. It's some bullshit. I do find... My parents have never hugged each other. Are your parents still together? In the eyes of the church.

Yeah. See, that always fucks me up way more. That makes me so uncomfortable for you. Your parents are together, but miserable. Who are you doing this for? I think a lot of people do it. There's always people that are like... I have friends with their parents who are like, as soon as

this kid gets out of here, we done and it's like why like you're not helping him like the kid is definitely silently rooting for it yeah yeah i know just go fuck someone yeah i'm trying to do a joke right now about how like um when you're young and your parents get divorced there's that thing where you're like it's my fault you know i you know i'm i'm the problem i'm too much my parents can't be together because like the kids have ruined their life and now that i'm older i realize i'm like oh if your parents are still together it's definitely your fault like you have like a drug addiction or there's some reason why they feel they have to stay together like i know my parents got divorced

it has nothing to do with me or my sisters. We're perfect. They got divorced because they're fucked up. But you see a kid addicted to Kratom and their parents are trying to figure out a way to send them to Malibu for rehab or something like that. They're pooling resources.

It probably pulls them closer together. It probably helps their relationship. The tag of that joke is essentially like divorce is expensive, but so is sending your kid to rehab. Like you have to make a choice. You can't do both. It really is a fact. Yeah.

You might as well. It is crazy. Yeah. The happiest families have the most fucked up kids or like people who like spoil their kids. Like I was at a, a wedding this past weekend and there was a kid who, uh, who like spoil their kids. Like I was at a, a wedding this past weekend and there was a kid who, uh,

who like last time I saw them, they were like, they were, they were way skinnier, but then like their, uh, memories I have of them is like being a kid and they're like drinking a two liter of Mountain Dew or whatever.

Like their parents are just completely indulging them all the way. Like giving them so much love or like anytime they want a toy, like they get the Dew or whatever. Their parents are just completely indulging them all the way, giving them so much love or anytime they want a toy, they get the toy or whatever. In practice, it sounds like good parenting. You want your kid to have things, but then the kids just wind up going through it

and being overweight and not loving their life. You have to hate your kids a little bit. A little bit. You have to hate your kids a little bit. A little bit. You have to be somewhat neglectful just so the kid can figure shit out on his own. And fend for themselves. Yeah.

I was the third. I have two older sisters. So by the time I was around, it was also like seven and five years after my sisters. And so by that point, my parents had like given up pretty much. They were like, you're a gift from God, I guess. Oh, you're the guess oh you're the youngest yeah yeah the youngest gets i mean i got two younger sisters and they don't like i i my my parents used to like make me do all kinds of crazy shit my little sisters it's just like go on tiktok scroll tiktok go to school like school is the worst thing that they've ever had to do by a mile it's nuts like like watching my parents, like just not give a fuck about what

my younger sisters do is insane. Yeah. Yeah. My dad, I mean, I would just like, I would like walk home from school or like take the city bus and just like make my own lunches. Cause my dad was out and like, you know, I just felt like I'm glad I'm, I'm honestly so glad that my parents weren't like that great at parenting me because I felt like I learned a lot more. It's such a blessing. If they were putting their all into it, that would be bad. If they gave their best effort. You'd be a politician.

Maybe. You would have finished off that political science degree. They wouldn't have let you. Where were you going to school? I was going to this shitty school in North County, San Diego called Cal State San Marcos. It was like a, it was a bad, like it wasn't, it wasn't for smart people. There was a girl there who's like, I had a 0.05 GPA and I got in. I was like, oh, that's good.

There were like service dogs on campus. And I'm like, I think they're students. I think they got in. Bright ass service dogs. I remember in like one of my first English classes at that college, the teacher was like, so do you guys know what chronological order is? And I was like, oh, we're starting from here. We're doing chronological order. And I was like, that's it.

I'm done. How did you pick that school, though? Like, just you lived in San Diego or you were closer there? I was living in Long Beach and I didn't do well in school. So my options were already limited. So I applied there because I knew it was easier. And then I applied to like San Francisco State University and I got into San Marcos and that was pretty much it. And then I made the decision to go there. And then I found out that I also got into San Francisco State. But I was like, whatever, I'm going to San Diego.

I knew I wasn't going to last. And it was like two hours away from home. So I could like, it was an easy transition. Yeah. That's straightforward. That's pretty easy. Did you ever fail in classes in high school? Oh, yeah.

Really? What was your GPA? I don't remember. Probably like. Well, I want to see if it's lower than mine. I thought I was a bad student. Yeah, I don't think. You were a bad at student?

I was a bad student. Oh, bad. Yeah, that sounds right. I remember my entire childhood was just do your homework. That was a constant conversation. And I was just like, yeah, OK. And I just never did it. Did you get like diagnosed with ADD or anything?

Oh, yeah. Fifth grade. Fifth grade? Yeah. But it wasn't even. I don't even think. I think diagnosed with ADD or anything oh yeah 5th grade but it wasn't even I don't even think I think I have ADD but like I think people make ADD way more serious than it is I was just like lazy also homework is bullshit like nobody

wants to do homework I was in 5th grade and everyone was like acting like I had some sort of like mental disorder because I didn't want to do my homework I wanted to like play video games the people who want to do their homework are losers facts why did you get ADD yeah I was uh well I don't do anything I wanted to play video games. The people who want to do their homework are losers. Facts. Why? Did you get ADD? Do you have ADD?

Yeah. Well, I don't do anything for it now. No, neither do I. I might need to, but... No, it makes you less funny. Those drugs. Yeah. What were you taking?

They destroy your... Everything. I've taken everything. Oh, really? Vyvanse? Concerta, Vyvanse, Adderall. I fuck with Vyvanse. There's one more.

I have all of them. Ritalin. Ritalin. I've taken all of them. They were like running experiments on me it was crazy i remember when i took vivans for the first time i was in fifth grade and i literally just had to lay on the couch like in the dark the entire day because i it fucked me up so bad like i'm like my head was like pounding and i like uh it's that those drugs are

so bad yeah and my doctor was like like like upping my dose. Yeah. Yeah. Like nonstop. That's what they did to me. And then my mom brought me to the doctor and they were like, he's like not a human anymore. Yeah. They were like, no, they're like, he has no personality. And they were probably gonna have to put him on some antidepressants. Oh God.

And that was when my mom was like, all right, you're not taking this stuff anymore. Yeah. Yeah. I had like a teacher's aide come into my classroom and he you know when they like have a student observer teacher whatever no you gotta pick that hair up that's gonna stay here forever these rooms don't get clean i'm leaving my dna that's gonna biodegrade in here um there was a like student observer teacher teacher's aide or whatever in the class and the whole time he was observing our class i think he was there for a week he's in our class and the whole time i just keep going up to him being like do you want to

see me dance do you want to see me sing like i'm putting on shows for him during the class how old were you this was in i think like eighth grade oh okay that's not that bad but too old too old for sure but it's not that bad i thought you guys like senior year of high school or something no no i was just like watch me watch me so i'm keeping him entertained i'm entertaining myself and then at the end of the week i get called into the office yeah and i get there and my mom and dad are there oh yeah my teacher's there that teacher's aid is there and they're like so we think your daughter has add yeah yeah and i was like or um you guys can observe my parents and tell them to give me more attention

at home so I don't put on performances for a strange man. So I don't desperately need attention. Yeah. I can't imagine what school was like from like the 50s to like the late 80s before everybody was on. Well, they would just beat your ass if you were doing

that. Yeah. They would beat the fuck out of you. I think that's when ADD... That's when the medication popped off when they couldn't whip ass anymore. If they can't beat the shit out of you, they're like, we're going to sedate them one way or another. You should not get that stuff prescribed at that young of an age.

If you get to an age where you're like, okay, I'm old enough to know what this is going to do and take it, sure. We can't whip ass and we can't sedate the baby, so what you want to do it doesn't even sedate you it literally just like kills you like you're not a human anymore and doesn't even help i was just like now i'm just gonna stare at this fucking crack in the wall for eight hours straight i felt like it helped me a little bit really yeah i felt more focused but then at a certain point when the dosage got real high i was just like i was i was like very focused on plans and

the way that I wanted things done. And I'd get so angry. I was furious 24 hours. Yeah. Constantly. My GPA skyrocketed and I lost a ton of weight. It was incredible, dude. I slimmed down and my grades got way better.

I was 40 pounds underweight in eighth grade. And then I gained like 40 pounds and they were like, yeah, you're getting, you're like gaining weight too fast. And I was like, yeah, maybe it had to do with, I was like a hundred pounds in eighth grade. Maybe that has something to do and they were like yeah you're getting you're like gaining weight too fast and I was like yeah maybe it had to do with I was like 100 pounds in eighth grade maybe that has something to do with it but yeah that shit's not good yeah it also does make you less funny yeah yeah it definitely like makes me very serious yeah yeah you lose your whole sense of humor yeah I feel like I lost a little bit of my brain chemistry oh yeah oh yeah big time yeah damn how are you to rebuild it back up?

Anytime I bomb, I'm like, it's from the Vyvanse in a way. This is not my fault, dad. I mean, mom. Yeah, that shit sucks. We've talked about it before, but I'm seeing it more and more where people act like ADD is a legitimate...

Oh, they're prescribing it so young now? Yeah, but people on Twitter and stuff act like it's like, I, I say they act like they have down syndrome. Like they want it to be treated. Like it's like, well, this crippling disorder that they have.

It's like, dude, like you, you don't pay attention well in class. Yeah. My, my aunt, there was a whole tweet,

there was a whole thread. And there was like, it was like, go easy on us. ADHD people. It was like, sometimes we ask questions twice. We can't help it. It was like it was like go easy on us adhd people it was like sometimes we ask questions twice we can't help it it was like dude like you're a normal person like stop trying to have something wrong with you so bad people do want to be like put into a category now it's

insane i mean i'll be honest it is pretty boring being like a pretty straight woman yeah yeah i'm like i want i want a little bit of rough and tumble yeah a little thing just a thing to have but it's like uh 100 for 100 on diagnosis with diagnoses with adhd like if you go in and ask for one they're going to give you one yeah it's guaranteed they've never had someone go in and been like now you're you don't have it yeah dude the test that they make you have to do the test it's like how would someone pass that they're like all right listen to this audio for two hours straight every time you hear a beep press this button and then it's like if you like stop paying attention to the beep 70 minutes in they're like yeah dude you're fucked yeah your brain's fucked up they like read me a list of like 75 random words and they're like

all right tell us the words back yeah they're like oh we were expecting you to group them differently yeah what the fuck yeah i'm an idiot as is i like bad like hey i like couldn't like use a pencil the right way when i was younger and they were like that's a symptom oh my god i mean that's what tiktok is now i'm diagnosing myself with new things every week it's fucked we need a new one though because it's adhd is like taking over and everybody has it it doesn't feel special anymore like i want a new thing. Yeah. Last time I saw my aunt, she was like, you know, us neurodivergent people.

I was like, you're saying that now? It's hit my aunt's age. But nobody's neurotypical, dude. I don't know a single person that causes if you have ADHD, that's neurodivergent. That's what she was saying. That's like who, so who is neurotypical? Everybody has ADHD. I have nothing wrong with me, actually.

I went back to the doctor and they said that I'm actually perfect. That's actually the new having everything. Just having nothing. They should just stop diagnosing it until you're like at least 15 or 16. You think? Well, people can get it at any time, though.

They'll give that shit away as an adult. I know nothing about it. I feel like everybody has it. Everybody has it. I think it's a spectrum now. Everyone has it. When it's just like, how bad do you want the drugs? Yeah. And they'll give them to you.

No matter how bad you want them. If you want them just a little bit, you can get the drugs. Like, you could have never had it in school and just, like, hate your job. And just, like, all right, you can grind through your job with it. Well, also now, like, our world is the society. We live in a society. Let's fucking go. And everything is made to be, like, happening all at once.

So it's like, yeah, obviously everyone's going to be, like, a little bit ADHD. We have nothing. Like, we need to go back to factory jobs. We need to just be sitting stationary, putting one thing on a factory line, and then going home, feeding our wives. Those are the happiest people. Yeah. Farmers. It is. Like, that's factory line, and then going home. Those are the happiest people. Yeah. Farmers.

It is. That's what it should be. We got to go back and be like, yeah, just stand here and fucking move this. Dude, I need a physical job. I think I'm losing circulation to the rest of my body because all I do is fucking sit around. I got cold wrists like a fucking octogenarian. I'm like on my deathbed. Octogenarian, likeogenarian like an 80 year old he's always throwing around big words he likes to drop one in every episode i didn't mean nothing by it

see if anyone else can pick up on what it means oct octo yeah yeah yeah see 80 years old oh see that's usually not it would just be like i feel like i'm 80 yeah like i'm fucking 80 years old yeah what kind of women do you like octogenarians it sounds like a good job yeah it looks like a shirt on venice beach that's like i'm not an octogenarian but i'll take a look take a look under the hood. That is funny as fuck. Should we do an ad? Ooh, our personal favorite. This next ad is from a personal favorite of ours, Shady Rays. Shady Rays sunglasses offer an industry-best combination of fit, style, and performance without the big brand price tag.

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Feel the comfort of those built-in liners today. And that's Bird Dogs. Head on down to Bird Dogs. Head on down. Come on. So you out JFL this year, right? Yeah. How was that?

It was so fun. Yeah, I got a question. What the fuck is that? I know. It's so funny. People will be like a question. What the fuck is that? I know. It's so funny. Like in the comic, people will be like, like when I go on stage, like what credits do you want? Should I say JFL?

I'm like, no one knows what JFL is. No one outside of comedy knows what JFL is. It's just for laughs. It's a comedy festival in Montreal. It's been happening for maybe like 40 years or something. And it's like very prestigious. It's like where a lot of comics got their big break. Congratulations.

It's a big deal. And now I'm doing Barstool. Hell of a fast. JFL to Barstool. Hell yeah. It doesn't really like, it used to be like, oh, this is where fucking Seinfeld

or like there's crazy stories from it. It still is a big deal now but it's not as like instant success overnight but it's really cool they have this new faces showcase where it's like yeah that's like the big thing to get to get JFL it's like the hot new comics

on the scene so I got to do that it was super fun so you already did it I did it yeah yeah that's just recently right it's like what a month ago a month or two ago yeah holy shit yeah to montreal which is like are people mean in montreal or what uh it's like french french canady french canadia french canada so are they nice or do they mean they're cool yeah i had cool i had a good time i had a bad time with a guy with bad time with a guy at passport control there. He had three fingers on his one hand, though.

So I was like, he's just being mean because he has three fingers. I didn't hold it against him. I just figured that was why. I feel like I saw that guy. Do you know who I'm talking about? I feel like I saw that guy. He told me to go get a new passport. He was like, this is too disheveled.

I want you to go straight to the Capitol. But I was flying to Toronto. But I just figured he was mean because was that a point or was that a palm that you just he kind of gave me but it was like it looked like it was all right yeah it was all three i get fisted by that guy that's an easy fish booming on yeah you mean uh you mean my boy marcello out there yeah i kicked with marce. His self-titled new Pete Davidson. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Marcelo's great.

He's a friend of mine. Yeah, I saw him last night. Marcelo's cool. Marcelo was there. A lot of New York. It was very New York heavy. Oh, yeah. Big time.

Damn. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Good thing. Yeah? Yeah. Any people not from America there? Any non-Americans? Yeah, for sure.

Not on the new faces. Not on the new faces? no they they have like their own it's like uh across the world like something like that yeah international they have an international showcase wasn't that british dude who's the british dude that really famous guy james a cast yeah he was there right oh my god i was you love him yeah i love him i was stalking him really because he i like never get the chance to see him perform. And so he was doing a bunch of shows there. So I literally like right after my first showcase,

which is like the big showcase. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a lot of people like stick around and watch all the other comics. But I was like, fuck that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I went right after my set, I left. Got some poutine or what? I got some nasty poutine.

I just saw the first available poutine and it was disgusting. There was like the guys working there weren't wearing gloves. They're just like dipping their hands into everything. It was foul. Damn. God damn. Poutine is a little bit better in theory than in practice. Like you think poutine is delicious and then you have it's just like a.

I had disco fries the other night at a diner here which is essentially like poutine yeah gravy and cheese it was so disgusting but i love shit like that like i love like nasty just like warm slop style yeah yeah i've had poutine once and it was in boston and it was fucking awesome it was good yeah it was great so yeah happy for you brother hate to pay to flex on you like that. Next time I'm in Boston. Next time you're in Boston, make a good poutine out there. You gotta try the poutine out there.

I got a question. Do you know Ryan Seacrest? I don't know. Whoa, IMDb daddy. I told you, I read your IMDb. I was like, damn, Ryan Seacrest is like a famous person who actually feels famous to me.

Yeah. Yeah, he's like mega famous. Yeah actually feels famous to me. Yeah. Yeah. He's like mega famous. Yeah. He's super famous. Yeah. He, um, no, I don't, I don't like know him anymore, but yeah, it did work for him. Yeah. We had a huge falling out.

That sucks. We're beefing. Yeah. Ryan, huge beef. But settle it now. Or we could fucking let it. We're going to bring him in. Yeah.

I just switch up. Get on in here, it. We're going to bring him in. I just switch up. Get on in here, Ryan. I'm like, Ryan, Ryan. I almost loved you. Do you remember me? What did you do with Ryan Seacrest? I used to work for him. I was an employee of Seacrest Media.

I was on his radio show, Kiss FM, for like four years when I was in third grade until about like sixth or seventh grade. I made prank phone calls on Kiss FM. Really? Yeah. Which is essentially like Z100. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The West Coast. And yeah, I just had this wild high pitch voice and I would make these prank phone calls. And it was like locally it was like a big deal. Like I'd go to fifth grade and people would be like, how's Ryan? Like I had like fake friends in school. That's hilarious. I was only your friend. So I could go to the Shark Tales premiere.

Damn, that's nuts. So you're doing that in third grade, you said? Third grade until like sixth grade. How did you get that gig? I just, I randomly called in like, you know how you can call and just like request a song or something. I just, one day I called in in i wanted to like say something on the radio once again parents aren't home i'm just looking for anyone to pay attention to me so i call in i get through and i'm asking for britney spears tickets and they're like can you sing a

song so i sing toxic i'm like the taste and then after i sing this song they're like oh we don't have we don't have britney don't have Britney Spears tickets, but we have American Idol tickets. And I'm like, only go if they're VIP. And they're like, who is this? They're like, where are your parents?

I'm like, I don't know. It's like seven in the morning. Um, and then they ended up like, they were like, we have an idea. It was a morning show.

It was a morning show. Yeah. Seven in the morning. My dad's out. So you just like, oh, you just opened your eyes. You're like,

I'm going to call into this. I'm going to prank someone. Yeah, I was getting ready for school. And my dad was taking my sister to school. And my other sister was home. And so I was like, let's call. And then the producer was like, we have an idea. If it works, great.

If not, whatever. Come to the studio this week. Have your dad call me. And we'll see if it works. And so we made these prank phone calls they put them out and ended up like being a success and so did it for like four years damn so you're like a child star i was a little i was yeah but it's one of those things where like i wasn't like i was locally famous yeah yeah yeah it was like a big deal locally

but like no one else that's crazy they don't even know that i'm on ryan's secret on the radio a radio star is hilarious too it's just like such a non-modern way to be a star oh yeah but i mean this was the time for it there was like ipod shuffles just came out you know but cars didn't have aux cords really yet. Yeah, totally. And it was like Sirius was just starting. So and I know that you could get like, what was the name of station? Clear Channel.

It was 102.7 Kiss FM. I feel like you could get Kiss FM like if you're in New York, if you had Sirius and shit like that. I feel like you still might be able to. When did Sirius start? I think around then. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know how old you are. So I don't know. How old are you still might be able to. When did Sirius start? I think around then. I don't know. I don't know how

old you are, so I don't know. How old are you? I just turned 27. Congratulations. This is a good year to die. I know. I just went to the also I didn't know. Do you know Basquiat, the painter? Oh, yeah. We're very friendly. We love Basquiat.

He's in front of the pod. Big time. He's coming on of the pod. Big time. He's coming on after this. I went to his, there's like an exhibit that I went to. Also, I didn't know his name was Jean-Michel.

I thought it was like John Michael. No, no, no. John Michael Basquiat. Jean-Michel Basquiat. Jean-Michel Basquiat. He died when he was 27 too. Yep. He's dead?

He's dead, yeah. He's dead as fuck, dude. What? I'm sorry. Yup. He's dead. He's dead. He's dead. What? Dude, what? I'm sorry. When did Basquiat die? In 88. I read his whole Wikipedia. Fuck, we were just kicking it recently.

If you have any other Basquiat questions, I'd be happy to answer it. Yeah. Who was he hanging out with? He was hanging out with Warhol. Warhol, right? Warhol. That really, that's what sent him into a spiral when Warhol died. Really?

But he was also kind of catching some flack for hanging out with Warhol so much that he was starting to be called like Warhol's sidekick. People say they fucked. Do you think they did? Yeah, absolutely. There's like Wikipedia or there's like TikTok rabbit holes where you can go down or the algorithm will just start feeding you New York tours where they go to like Basquiat's old house and shit like that. In Park Slope. Yeah, it's like this is the little... Have you been on tours where they go to like Basquiat's old house and shit like that. In Park Slope. Yeah. It's like, this is the little, have you been on it or you went to, you read it? No, I read the whole Wikipedia.

God damn. You were obsessed with Basquiat. He's half Haitian, half something else. His mom got put in and out of mental facilities and that's when he really kind of lost control and was like running away from home, dropped out of school. Damn. He was good at drawing crowns. And dinosaurs. Yeah. He painted his works like hundreds at a time.

Let's go, bro. Did you read his, did you read it too? I got a coffee book of his. Of Basquiat? We're big Basquiat fans. But then I didn't, I was at the I was at the exhibit and a lot of his stuff, it'll have like, you know, he'll write something because it was a mix of like poetry and art. And he would put like quotes around it and then put like a little C circle thing, the

trademark thing. And I'm like, did Virgil Abloh. Stole Basquiat's whole school. Did he like, was that like a nod? Did he ever acknowledge it? You're bringing up some controversial topics now Yeah they're both dead But I just don't know enough about Virgil

To know if he was like Oh yeah this was inspired by Basquiat Or if he was like this is totally mine Yeah I honestly didn't know anything about Virgil We gotta get those guys on the pod Yeah we gotta get Virgil on Basquiat We need a Ouija board So we can link up with Basquiat and fucking Virgil.

You guys should have a medium on the pod. Yeah, we should. We got two shmediums. We just need a medium. Yeah, two shmediums. We just need one medium. Fuck yeah, bro. Yeah.

I had a medium on my podcast, my friend Monterey. Monterey, like the city? Monterey, yeah. And she's the second medium to tell me. She was like, you were molested as a child. And I'm like, this information isn't helpful. I don't know who did it. I just have to walk around.

I called my mom. I'm like, mom, was I molested as a child? And she was like, yeah, we did have some weird babysitters. I'm like, okay. Wait, for real? Yeah, I guess so. And these mediums knew that? We'll stray away from the medium then.

Yeah, I'm not trying to find out. I got molested. I know, it's so unhelpful. Yeah. They also could just bullshit. I know, that's what I'm saying. I'm like, just because I have sad eyes doesn't mean I was molested.

That's a bold one, though. They go for like dead grandmas. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were molested. Yeah. Or they'll be like, you're going to meet a tall guy with brown hair. go for like dead grandmas yeah yeah yeah molested yeah or they'll be like you're gonna meet a tall guy with brown hair it's like dude yeah that's most dudes yeah yeah yeah most human males of men at least yeah so it's half a barstool for sure no no no no more if they were like you're gonna meet a guy's like, it's surprising he's alive at how fat he is. Then that would be most of Barstool.

He's 24 and morbidly obese. It's our calling card. What do you know about Barstool? Yeah, what do you know about the stool? Okay, here's what I know about Barstool. Call her daddy used to be here. Big drama. I used to sit right here.

Feels like just yesterday. You feel that? I feel like ghosts in here. Right in this room is where they came up with the gluck gluck. Oh, yeah. It was beautiful. I remember that like it was yesterday. Yeah, it did. The whole office was buzzing.

I just love a place that has drama. Yeah. You know, like I love drama. We have it all the time. So that's fun. It's pretty easy to not get involved in drama. Yeah. Like me, we even, like I don't think any of us have ever been involved in any, but some

people it's like every day there's something new. Yeah. Some people really love drama. Some people thrive on it. I think it's people who have like somewhat boring lives. Yeah. Yeah, probably. And now I have drama with those people.

Oh yeah. You're taking shots. You're taking shots at Virgil. I want that on the record. Poor. Oh, yeah. You're taking shots. You're taking shots at Virgil. I want that on the record. Poor Virgil, dude. You guys do the food testing, right? Yeah. My boyfriend watches those videos on the toilet.

The food tests. Yeah, the food tests. And then Dave Portnoy loves eating pizza, I think. Wait, yeah. So what's the food testing? What was the... The one in the office where there's like a weird food. There's a guy... Oh, oh, oh. Lowering the bar. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what's the food testing? What was the... The one in the office where there's like a weird food. There's a guy who...

Oh, oh, oh. Lowering the bar. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like got to be one of Barstool's biggest shows outside of like... I want to try it. Are they doing it today? I want to try a weird ass food. They probably are.

I have no idea. Really? Yeah. Everyone I talk to is always like that. Everyone's always like, oh, I don't watch Barstool, but I do watch Lowering the Bar all the time. Do you feel like there's a lot that you wouldn't eat? Would you do well on a show like that?

Or are you going to be like throwing up and it'll be funny? In my head, I think I'm like really adventurous and like YOLO vibes, you know? Like in my head, I'm just like this wild person. But I think maybe in actuality, I'd be like, I'm scared. I don't like the texture. Yeah, well, that's what it is, though. It's a lot of like really gross shit. But then also there's part of me that's like, oh, well, it's being filmed.

And mama loves attention. So I'm like, yeah, I'll fucking do it. Rowan hosted, tell her about Most Dangerous. It was a game show that I hosted that he was doing where you had to do, like, nasty stuff. I had to eat a scorpion. For attention. For attention, yeah. Yeah, see, you know those, like, scorpion lollipops? Like the dry one. Oh, the one where there's a bug inside of it. Yeah For attention, yeah. Yeah, see, you know those like scorpion lollipops?

Like the dry- Oh, the one where there's a bug inside of it? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got one of those and I was too scared to eat that. But is that real? I always thought those were fake. I think they're fake, but even the thought of it-

They are fake? I thought they were real for sure. Oh, they are? That's amazing. I remember seeing those as a kid and being like, oh, that has to be fake. Yeah. Why would you buy that? No.

You know what would make this lollipop better? If there was a dead bug inside of it. That would make this be really good. It's trying to turn people out to start eating the bugs. Yeah,

you pro-eat the bugs? I mean, yeah, I don't know. It's like one of those things when you're a kid and you're like swimming and you're like,

there's a shark in the pool and it's like, obviously that's never going to happen, but your imagination is so wild. I still get that. Yeah, in my head, eating the dead scorpion and you're like, there's a shark in the pool and it's like, obviously that's never going to happen but your imagination is so wild. I still get that. Yeah, in my head, eating the dead scorpion,

I'm like, my saliva will bring it back to life and I'll have a scorpion living inside of me. Like all logic goes out the door. I'm like,

this is my reality now. That would be sweet as fuck though, to have a scorpion living inside of you, just like in your tummy. Would be interesting. When I ate the scorpion,

it wasn't bad because it was like dead as fuck it was just like crunchy so he had another favorless potato chip yeah but then i tried they tried making it a water bug which was like similar size to the scorpion but way more dense hell i took like a little tiny bite and i was like no it was so it was foul did you ever did you ever fuck with that I'll take a tiny bite of something and I'll eat it without a problem but I'm not trying to eat all of something like finishing something that was when it got to the problem with the scorpion was when I was like wrapping up and I was like dude this is in my body right now and when I like went for the torso even though it still was like very small but oh so gross yeah bad don't eat scorpions is also what i know about barstool um i don't know if

i'm allowed to say this uh say it uh dave portnoy has a sex tape that's out several multiple have you guys watched of course i watched the first one but i didn't i stopped watching after the first one we have like a viewing party every time one drops at the office it's so wild yeah in my head right out of theater i think it'd be really interesting to like watch a couple have sex like in person is that just me or are you talking about pornography no like in person yeah no but i've heard people say stuff like that i don't know if i would enjoy it but just for like uh and what i don't know what the word is. Anthropologic, uh, purposes. I would just be curious to observe how that goes down. But then watching that video,

I was like, maybe I don't, maybe it's too much because in my head people are having boring sex. And then I saw that and I'm like, I didn't even know that was on the table. I've never seen a menu where that's offered. Yeah. Where. How did it come across your desk? My boyfriend, I think my boyfriend works at a podcast studio and Dave was doing a podcast with someone at the studio he works

at and then they were talking, I guess somehow it came up that he has sex tape so we watched it together. Interesting. Yeah. What studio is that? Melrose Podcast. It's in LA. Interesting. We. What studio is that? Is that Melrose Podcast? Melrose Podcast. It's in LA. Oh, hell yeah.

Yeah. Interesting. Interesting. We'll have to check that out. Check out the studio when you're in town. We gotta check out his podcast studio. Do you think that it'd be harder

to work for a boss where you've become so intimately familiar with them? With their sex life? No. Because I'm so used to comics and comics are weird. Oh, yeah.

They all have gross don't know if gross shit going on yeah and they like talk about it or they i feel like some comics probably do weirder shit so they could be like so i was doing this fucked up shit the other day it's like dude you did that shit on purpose like you're not like fucking twisted you're just looking for material yeah yeah it's called committing to the bit is that why you shaved your head this year no just committing to the bit you shaved your head about it. Is that why you shaved your head this year? No. Just committing to the bit?

You shaved your head? Yeah. I think that was a couple months before Moon Tower. I don't know if I still was buzzed up then. I don't remember. I think it grew back, but I shaved it. When a guy shaves his head like that, someone who's known for not having a shaved head, do people go, did you go crazy? Yeah.

That's what everyone... Everyone assumed you went crazy. Everyone assumed I went crazy, which I might have a little bit, but I don't think I fully did. I had wanted to shave my head since I was... For four years now. I remember the first time I was going to do it,

I was fully going crazy, though. And then my roommate at the time was like, no. Or no, he was like actually super like into it. He's like, all right, bro, but if you shave it, I'm doing it.

And then I was like, never mind, I'm not doing this. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. But he was just going to steal your attention. Yeah, I don't know what it is. I mean, I just want it, uh, he was just going to steal your attention. Yeah. I don't know what it is.

I mean, I just want it. I do. Then people will think we both went crazy. It's like someone wearing the same shirt as you. Yeah. But yeah, I,

uh, it was, I got denied a raise, which is why everyone thought I, that's why everyone thought I did it. Oh, that's so funny. But it wasn't,

I ended up getting denied a raise and then I got COVID. How do you get, what does that mean? Getting denied? I asked for a raise. I ended up getting denied a raise and then I got COVID. How do you get? What does that mean? Getting denied? I asked for a raise. I didn't get it. Oh, I thought you meant. Oh, my God.

I heard you wrong. I thought you meant you got denied at raise the bar that like Nicholas Braun goes to. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. And they're like, nah, man. No, no, no. I was like, that's such a sad. Yeah. Go to the bar.

No, I asked for a raise here and I got denied. And then it became like a big public thing. And I was getting like publicly shamed. And then I got COVID like the next day. And then I shaved my head. Nice. Yeah. Yeah, it was tough.

He saw a day of sex tape and he was like, I don't fucking respect this man. And tried to march into his office and ask for a raise. It actually wasn't like that at all. he actually like gas lit me into thinking what i was asking for was a fine amount and then dave was like that was the most delusional offer i've ever been asked in 20 years oh my god he's like i've been doing this for 20 years never in my life he didn't even say offer he just said it was the craziest thing he's ever heard yeah so have you gotten a raise yet

I have not should we talk to Dave yeah maybe you should represent him yeah do you think you could

yeah absolutely are you a good negotiator no that's what you think and then you see him and you're like whoa he's scary

that's the guy from the tapes yeah yeah yeah I love your work yeah yeah you've seen nothing that he does except for him with a dog collar I'm like He's scary. That's the guy from the tapes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love your work. Yeah, yeah. You've seen nothing that he does except for him with a dog collar. I'm like, Lil Sass needs a raise.

And in order to do that, he's like, I'll do it, but you have to say, what does he say in the video? Something like, daddy, but it's so aggressive. Oh, I haven't watched in depth like that. I wasn't watching with the subtitles on. As a transcript. Yeah, I read the screenplay of it. It went perfectly to script. Yeah, it's an interesting dynamic, but I don't think it's affected that as much as,

I don't know, you'd think it would affect way more to have your boss. No, he doesn't give a fuck. That's why it's not like a big deal. That's why I like, I love, I'm obsessed with Karen Feehan. Yeah. She has an OnlyFans. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm so obsessed. I think it's not like a big deal. That's why I like I love I'm obsessed with Karen Feehan. Yeah. She has an OnlyFans.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm so obsessed. I think it's so cool. I subscribe to her OnlyFans for a month. You know, I'm not committing that hard to watching her porn. But it rocks.

It's so cool to just be like, yeah, I've had sex and you can watch it. Yeah. And she's making like a shitload of money. I think she talks about it on stage. I think she said she was like, I made like $27,000 last month. So cool. I was like, holy fuck. Wait, that's not that much for having sex on camera.

I don't think she's not having sex on camera. She's like making sexy videos of just herself. She'll like be at the gym in the sauna and she'll like lower her like pants on the back so you can see her butt and it rocks. And so were you just curious when you subscribed or were you just trying to support the arts? I'm more curious but then I was like she does good work.

Hell yeah. That's quite the endorsement. But I'm like that's when I become I'm like I'm too awkward. I'm too awkward. I can't do OnlyFans. I'm too awkward. Dude a lot of girls a lot of women in here have started doing OnlyFans. And they're not, no one's getting naked, really.

No one's getting naked. They're scamming. Yeah, that's how I feel. They're scammers. Yeah, I couldn't. I would be, yeah, I would feel like I'm scamming. They're selling a dream. Yeah.

Yeah. But that's what it works. You know what I mean? Yeah, I'm not mad at people for making money outside of it. No, I don't give a fuck. Especially living in New York. I get it. Oh, yeah.

It's too expensive living here. I'm too expensive you have to find something yeah have you is that like something that's holding you back from moving to new york like the like the fact you have to do only fans the fact that you have to do only fans i have to also like do you have like a nice apartment in la um i have a decent apartment in la yeah it's definitely like if i moved here i would be downgrading. Oh, big time. Yeah. I mean, I don't care. I don't need my house to be like a palace or anything. Just a lot of plants? No, I'm not good with the plants.

They die? Yeah. What about with rodents? We don't really have any rodents. There's no rodents. Here, it will. I know. We got rodents. We have a lot of rodents right now. We got a problem over at our place. They're so will. I know. We got rodent. We have a lot of rodents right now. We had a problem over at our place. They're so cute.

I saw two tiny little baby rats. Oh, gross. I just wanted to pick them up. Are you sure they weren't mice? They might have been mice. No, they're probably rats. Those rats are not cute. No one has ever looked at a rat and be like that.

How big were they? They're tiny. Really? Oh, rats are so gross. Their tails are like this thick. I love them. I also love like opossums. Maybe you would like New York. Yeah, maybe you would.

My mom, when she came out here, her first time here, she kept, she was so excited to be in the city and she just kept sending photos of rats in the subway, like in the train. She was like, oh my God, second day in New York. Look what I saw. It's all just

the rats. Just a rat rubbing someone at gunpoint. Yeah. The rats are so gross. I love it. Aggressive ass rat. But I can't, I mean, you guys have mice and you refuse to do anything about it. It makes me think you like them. In your apartment?

Yeah. Inside, living amongst you. Yes. I was there a couple days ago or like a week or so ago. I was in my room and I watched one come into my room and then leave my room with the door closed. What if we just found out you're super racist and it's just that you have like a Jewish room? We have a rap problem.

One time I had an Uber driver taking me home and I was living in like not a great area and the Uber driver was like, yeah, we got to clean up these streets. And I was like, do you mean like litter wise? If an Uber driver is racist, they will we got to clean up these streets. And I was like, do you mean like litter wise? If an Uber driver is racist, they will let you know. Yeah.

They have to. And if an Uber driver is racist, they're an Uber driver. Oh, yeah. Across the board. Same with cab drivers. Cab drivers are going to get it off their chest. It doesn't matter where they fall in the pecking order. There's someone where they're like, you can't go to that area.

It's all like this type of people. Yeah. I had an Uber driver like probably like a year ago but it was in new york and he was telling me that like the day before like three black kids like threw a brick through his windshield and we're like and i was like then he said a bunch of racist shit afterwards and i'm like dude like there's no way you could ever convince me that that just like that just happened i don't know you definitely did you definitely were doing something somewhere that you shouldn't have been doing. And then they ended up throwing the brick that you probably deserved it.

Dude, when I was in Nashville a couple weeks ago and I met one of the top 10 Uber drivers in the world. They had 23,000 trips. They'd been on Uber for nine years and they had a perfect five-star rating. They'd never gotten a single bad fucking, a bad rating on Uber. Just like a minivan. Oh, I was going to say it has to be a minivan. A minivan is a good experience.

Did he have like lights in it? It wasn't lights, but it was very, uh, it was just like he had a couple options of maybe like hard candy or like a couple bottles of water. And he was just very patient with me. I went in,

I got some donuts and he just sat in the car while I got donuts. It was, it was fantastic. Yeah. They really like when Uber and stuff first started, they really were like, here's water, here's candy, here's gum. And now they're like, shut the fuck up. Yeah. They will always give you their smelly asshole without fail fail It's still so much better Than cabs though Like cabs suck No I like cabs Do you think?

Yeah when I'm out here I love a cab They're cheap They're cheap Which is nice I like when a cab Like takes a corner fast And you just slide

The whole way across Cause there's no partition In the middle And it's just a leather seat Just whipping you around Like a cocktail shaker Back there I took a cab home

From the airport yesterday and it was a really shitty cab. It was hot out and there was no air conditioning in it. Turn on the air. Sometimes I think they like the heat. Yeah. It saves money. Right? Doesn't using the AC use up gas? Yeah. I just drove to North Carolina and back this weekend

and the dude driving me was like yeah, the AC just broke. And then... Wait, we took an Uber to North Carolina? No, no. I drove and my friend was driving. Oh, oh, oh, oh. And he said that the air conditioning wasn't working. And then like with one hour left in the drive, he like put up the windows and like the air

conditioning was working. It was like, dude, this entire time we were fucking screaming at each other with the window down. What? And the air conditioning actually did work. He's like, yeah, it just doesn't work that well. I was like, what the fuck? We were yelling at each other,

putting up the windows to talk on the phone, sweating, and just finally he put it up. He's like, yeah, I'm out of Freon. I was like, dude, we could have been comfortable and conversing like normal people. Also, just stop and pick up Freon. I know. I don't even know what Freon was, so he had me on that one.

It's like, can you just get Freon? I didn't get that anywhere. I used that in my car, right? You just spray the engine with it or something? No, no. It's just like a liquid. You just pour it into whatever hole it needs to be poured in. Damn.

Are you an octogenarian? How do you know that? No. No, I'm good pals with my mechanic, Socko. Socko? Yeah, Socko. Socko. We got to bring your car into Socko, bro. Damn. How do you know? What, Socko. Socko? Yeah, Socko. Socko. We got to bring your car into Socko, bro.

Damn. How do you know? What's Socko tell you? Socko tells me that I look beautiful. He really boosts my confidence. Really? Yeah, Socko's like, you're the most beautiful woman. Thanks, Socko.

How's your wife? Damn. Do you have to get your, I guess living in LA, you're going to have to get your car service the decent amount or more than we do. We don't fucking have cars. You don't have cars. Yeah. You got to go every 5,000 miles.

Get the oil changed. My problem is I would just get fucking duped by a Socko type character in my life. I just don't know enough. I just don't know enough about fucking cars or what shit's supposed to cost. Because when Socko starts working, I go, show me. And I just don't know enough about fucking cars. That's why I know about it. When Sako starts working, I go, show me. And I stand with him. Oh, that's smart. And he has one of those hot babe photos of a girl

with a car. And I always go, that's me. You just love you. That's awesome. Damn, I respect that. That's a manly ass thing to do. How long are we in? Hour 20? Oh, hour 20. long are we in? Hour 20. We'll wrap it up. Do you have anything you want to plug?

Plug away. Throw some plugs in. We got a money spending crowd. You tell them to spend money on some shit, they'll fucking throw money around. I got a few hats left. I made some limited edition merch. I'm not remaking it.

I have some sick hats on my website, AllieMikofsky.com. If you want to come to a show, tickets are at AllieMikofsky.com. If you want to see my Instagram, you can go to, it's at not AllieMac. And I used to have a podcast

called Resting Bitch. It's being revamped. We're doing something new. But if you want to see the old episodes, I got some heat on there. Fuck yeah. Got some good shit on there. Let's go. Buy a hat.

Drop some heat. Yeah, go see Ali Makovsky live in action. Hell yeah. All right. Thank you, guys. We'll see you guys next week. Thank you. Thanks for having me. That was fun. All right. Thank you, guys. We'll see you guys next week. Thank you. Thanks for having me.

That was fun. Appreciate you. Oh, picture.