Son of a Boy Dad - Son of a Boy Dad: Ep. 84 - Smurfs feat. Dan Soder

Episode Date: October 19, 2022

Sas is heading back to the Mall of America, nobody can get Rone's name right, Benjamin Button is terrifying, and we are a Phillies podcast now. Dan Soder joins the second half of the episode to talk all things Smurfs, amateur DJ's, stealing gnomes, and more. Enjoy.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. What is up, everybody? Welcome back to Son of a Boy Dad Podcast. Today it is Tuesday, October 18th. Yes, sir. And we are in this bitch.

And we are in the studio. Like we never left. Like we never left. Like we never left. It's 2.42. It's 2.42. We're not in the radio room today. Which, I don't mind. We're in our own little corner of this office.

You saw they built Chicken Fry's studio, though. They built you a studio, brother. Yeah, we're trying to put it on someone else. They built you a big-ass studio. Yeah. Yeah. That was crazy, dude dude it looks like you guys are in the exact same they've just built the exact same setup for both of you guys yeah

it kind of works it works very well i thought you i i couldn't tell if you guys were in different places or not yeah me and you are actually in different places right now yeah people don't know that people can't tell because they built the same studio for sass while he's on the road follows him around in a trailer everywhere it goes it's actually super cool of them to hook that up i was pumped about that it's like when garth brooks takes his like recording studio on the road and like the tour bus behind him smart you got your tour bus going from fucking buffalo to minnesota wherever the hell you're going and right behind it's your podcast studio i'll be in minnesota this weekend at the house of comedy in the mall of

america and i let me say one thing i'm excited to get back to the i'm excited to be back in minnesota and i'm excited to be most of all in the mall of america yeah it's cold i'm gonna ride the world roller coaster every single day you won't i will not i'll i'll pay you a hundred dollars if you do i'll pay you a hundred dollars a day if you do it every day dude i think it costs like 40 isn't it like expensive so you'll make 60 a day that's not worth it bro i'm gonna eat 160 no no no yeah i want to go out with a sick with a hundred flat every day uh no no that's bullshit i'll give you the hundred and you figure out how much it is.

It's probably $36 and I'm willing to split the $36 with you so you'll come out with $118 every day if you do it every day. So that's $118. How many days are you out there? Four? That's almost 500 smackaroos, brother. You're going to have to ride it on Sunday before I go to the airport.

With all my luggage. If you want the whole $118. Yeah. If you want my fat $118. I hope we're not staying in the airport. Or to the airport. If you want the whole 118. If you want my fat 118. I hope we're not staying in the airport. Or not the airport. In the Mall of America. Isn't there a hotel at the mall? There is. I bet we're staying at it.

It'd be sweet to not go outside for the whole time you're in Minnesota. That would suck so much, dude. No, Minnesota's so cold. Walking outside of the fucking hotel and in the mall that would bull that would take me to new levels of depression you go out for a smoke and you're in the victoria secret that would suck you know they have like a they should have like some sunlight some uv some uv lights yeah some fake light it like dims have you ever seen those uh like fake windows uh that or

like yeah if you have like a wall in your house they'll put a fake window that goes through the whole cycle of light so that like it simulates your brain to think that you're like experiencing the that can't help i can't do as much as they probably say it does they probably i don't know dude people talk crazy about light i'm about to be on the blue light glasses because i think i'm pouring badness into my brain you are yeah the blue light glasses because I think I'm pouring badness into my brain. You are. Yeah.

The blue light glasses actually do help. But you don't use them? No, I did when I was in high school. I need some blue light contacts. Because I was getting migraines and they were helping me a lot. Yeah. Then you got off them? Yeah.

They look a little weird because they are very like mirrored. But some of them look stylish. Chef Donnie was wearing some. He looked like the fucking Great Gatsby or some shit. Yeah, they are nice. If the Great Gatsby wore glasses. Yeah. I got to get on those. Maybe we'll both get on them look stylish. Chef Donnie was wearing some. He looked like the fucking Great Gatsby or some shit. Yeah, they are nice. If the Great Gatsby wore glasses. Yeah, I got to get on those. Maybe we'll both get on them.

Yeah, that would be sweet. Yeah. Or if there's a Blue Light Glasses sponsor that wanted to get on the fucking train. Yeah, they hop on the show. Get on this runaway train. Actually, I think there's probably two brands that I can think of off the top of my head. If they want to go to the moon. They're probably listening and they're probably wondering why did we not buy ad space on this episode.

Yeah, get on the space. It's probably because we're giving them we're about to give them a free ad but we're not gonna we're gonna stop short of saying their name any brand names if anything i'll say a brand name it's not them yeah oakley's shady rays i bet oakley's does uh fucking blue lights freaking celebrity booker kelly's calling me kelly no celebrity bookers freaking celebrity booker kelly kelly freaking unbelievable i'm recording exclamation point what did you do to soda he won't stop talking yeah yeah he's off this murder is talking later on in this episode we're gonna have dan soda on in a highly charged, energetic interview. Very energetic.

It's a very good interview, too. We really pried him open. Oh, dude, we had research that we got to the bottom of. We had so many good questions. We nardwared his ass. We found out shit from early on in his career. People that he had talked to. You've got to stick around for that interview.

Dude, I think we do the guests. I think we do guests the best. The guests, anytime they come in. We just make them think they're part of the crew. Yes. First of all, they're not. We make them think they are. They want to be.

Yeah. No, but everyone's always like, oh, this was fun. It's like, yeah, because we're not going to sit down and be like, so when did you start doing standup? Yeah, we're just going to talk. They don't want to talk about that dumb shit. We're going to talk about poop and pee. They want to riff with the fellas.

They want to talk Smurfs. Especially comedians. And gnomes. They'll even come in and be like what is this show then they'll be like holy shit these guys are actually really good these guys are actually funnier than fuck yeah these guys are funnier than fuck like oh no i just shit myself from laughing so hard at these funniest fuck guys yeah which is them we have a good time you also have been funny as fuck on uh stand up and i saw a clip that you put out. Yeah, I don't know.

I know you're down on yourself about that clip. I thought it was good. No, I'm not down on myself. I think the joke was funny. I think it was good. Funny joke. Posting stand-up is tough because anytime you post it, people are going to try and critique it. I hate when people notice stuff about me that I didn't notice about myself.

Yeah, it's not even that. People are just like, oh, this, the delivery, the fucking, oh, you didn't, people were calling it crowd work. Like, no, dumbass, it's not crowd work. That was a written joke you had. It was a written joke, along with a series of other jokes about Jeffrey Dahmer that I didn't want to post because I didn't want to get canceled. Oh, really?

They're a little more risque. Oh, damn. No, they're not. But what kind of stuff do you say? Hey, it's got to be homophobic. what kind of stuff do you say hey it's got to be homophobic it's all slurs yeah it's got to be home i mean and he's one guy that if you're going to be homophobic again yeah yeah yeah it kind of seems get out of jail free exactly because he's a bad man no but if all gays were like him there is more to that joke i just like i don't want to do the domer stuff like i'm i don't know i don't really know how long i'm going to do that stuff before because it feels like it's dying out yeah i'm not going to

post my like good written material that you're timeless shit you're evergreen stuff that i can keep doing and working on so it's like i don't know it just annoys me when people are like that like they've never done stand-up they don't know anything about it and they're like um this feels like you shouldn't be posting crowd work and it's like it's like dude the whole like the joke is if i like i know if i ask hey has anyone ever seen anyone watch those documents which also so i saw some dude that was like such a weird thing to just throw out and be like does anyone here watch serial killer documentaries like what do you think i started the show with that i just got on stage i was like so does anyone here watch serial killer documentaries honestly it wouldn't be that think? I started the show with that. I just got on stage. I was like, so does anyone here watch serial killer documentaries?

Honestly, it wouldn't be that bad to start the show with because everybody does. Yeah. But also that that that is coming off of a joke. It's coming off of a Ted Bundy joke that I do. So that's why I change into that. These motherfuckers should just be grateful that they just got another grid post on Instagram from SAS after fucking no no the entire summer of no grid posts yeah yeah dude someone was like where have you been bro and he was like i post

on my story like five times a day for yeah close friends no no i post on there very rarely i post my close friends and i'm like what the fuck am i doing and i delete it because you'll post like the dumbest meme i know it'll be like a toy story yeah the toy story meme is hilarious posting a meme on instagram is like uh well dude you guys didn't follow me back in my og days i used to be posting memes on my story like 20 times i know and i think when you post a bunch of them it's funny because someone can go to your page for a bunch of laughs but when you post a one-off meme every like two months people it's like it is weird because i'll be like i'm gonna start posting again on like social media more but then it's like

i i don't think i could ever go back to the way i did it when i first started doing it because i was just like i didn't care at all and i was like this doesn't mean anything to me so i was just posting whatever you need a third burner you need a third you need like another toast account that you could just throw shit on there i used to just be throwing up memes and spotify links like 40 times a day yeah you're spotting i would like a screenshot of like two minutes into a mac miller song yeah yeah exactly like clips of songs that's like music videos and stuff dude we gotta start and then i just post and be like i'm so depressed i'm gonna kill myself like i would just post this and be like, I'm so depressed. I'm going to kill myself. Like, I would just post that on my story. Shit like that.

Be like, dude, I don't think I can do it anymore. And people would just be like, all right, next, next, next. I would just post anything on my story. Or people hit you with like the crying, laughing emoji. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, this was like before they even had the reacting thing. Really? This was a dude when I was in college.

I'd just be posting and being like, I hate my life. I think they had the crying, laughing emoji last year when you were in college. Bro, that was three years ago. Dang, time does fly. Time flies. Well, the one thing that I did notice about looking back at your Instagram posts is that, and I'm sure this is only true because you have gotten older, but you did look young as fuck in all your last posts.

Yeah, because I've gotten older and I've gotten fatter. Yeah. Yeah. So has everyone. So has I. Someone said in the last video that we did, the last've gotten older and I've gotten fatter. Yeah. Yeah, so has everyone. So has I. Someone said in the last video that we did, the last episode,

they said I looked younger than you. Or I looked older than you. And I did not look young there. No. That was a rough week for me. Sass is aging like Jack. Have you ever seen that Robin Williams?

It's like a Robin Williams movie where he like goes through all the ages by the time he Robin Williams? It's like a Robin Williams movie where he like goes through all the ages by the time he's eight. He's like in high school and he's an old man. Well, it's reverse Benjamin Button. Oh, Benjamin Button.

No. Benjamin Button gets younger, no? I thought he got older. And so he just gets older fast. No, because at the end of Benjamin Button, he's a baby and he has an old lady wife.

I thought he was an old, old baby. He's got like wrinkled skin, doesn't he? Look, he's an old man in a baby's he was an old baby. He's got like wrinkled skin, doesn't he? Look, he's an old man. In a baby's body. Going back to, I've never watched Benji Butts. Yeah, neither have I.

I've never seen it. It's just apparently it's supposed to be super good. It's actually kind of disgusting. Yeah, it looks gross as fuck. Yeah, he's a gross old man baby. He's like a shaved cat. Yeah, that shit's horrific. That shit is not cool. But it was brad

pitt at his hottest it was well i guess you couldn't even tell you he looks like et ew dude punch that baby punch that baby to death yeah i would kill the fuck out of you ever think about that i would abort that baby i don't see a baby without thinking i would go all abortion all over that thing but uh like that would be crazy if you could abort Benjamin. You probably could. Yeah. I mean, that's probably how he dies. The fucking libs.

I know they're aborting like six-year-olds at this age. At this point. Goddamn liberals. They're in their 56th month of pregnancy having an abortion. These freaking liberals. These liberals have no respect for fucking human life. These goddamn liberals. Not like us libertarians. No, we These goddamn liberals. Not like us libertarians.

No, we're libertarians. Not like us librarians. Yeah. We're one of the biggest librarian podcasts out there. We gotta be. Yeah. At least top five. Yeah, it's sick.

The only comics are either libertarians or late night comedy. Yeah. What do you mean by that? You have a libertarian sense of humor or you're like the election was stolen yeah yeah yeah fucking trevor noah trevor noah's leaving the late show bro let's talk on that is he yes why or the daily show he's they didn't even put him at night that's how much he sucked well it is at night the daily show is a nighttime show i'm riffing oh fuck Let me riff for once.

God damn it. I'm a fact checker. Deep down in my cockles, that's who I am. I love to correct people. I come from a long line of correctors. When I was in Buffalo, I was watching The Office on TV on Comedy Central. And it was a rotation between this Arby's ad and an ad for Trevor Noah, the Daily Show. And it was driving me insane, dude.

It's crazy that there's only like five ads on the TV. Yeah. And I don't even know what they are, but I know them by the song. Yeah. No, I knew these ones like word for word. You're probably singing along with the farmer song. Yeah, the Arby's one was pretty good. Arby's.

They've really spiced it up nothing drives me crazier than when somebody i'm around somebody who starts singing along with a commercial song what like cars for kids yeah when but they sing along with it or like that's because dude they're being they're being brainwashed i know the capitalist america and that's what pisses me off i'm like you you understand what's happening right you understand that they put that song in there as a catchy ass song to you got caught by the catchy song you know it's catchy because it caught you yeah that's that's embarrassing it's embarrassing it happens to my it happens to my wife sometimes embarrassingly we're in therapy get that under

control yeah get that under control we're in better help marathon session screaming crying god damn she keeps on singing the fucking the cars for kids jake from state farm song there's no song for jake from state farm dude that's how i know i'm riffing bro let me riff now you're fact checking me i'm fact checking you because i think you thought there was a song for Jake for State Farm. I know there's not. I don't think you did. I saw you looking to find something. In my head?

And then you went with Jake from State Farm. It's another insurance one. I'm sitting there and I'm thinking, there's no song for Jake for State Farm. No, there's the Farmer song. And then there's another one that, or there's the sky rizzy song nothing is everything dude the geico commercials suck dick mook knows what i mean why why do the guy the guy who commercials they're just doing anything now i like that but they're just doing anything and at the end they're just like i guess get insurance with geico yeah they're always like we need the stupidest

fucking mascot possible fucking they'll be like oh these headphones are my headphones broken or no that wouldn't even work because that's something broke yeah it has nothing to do with it they'll be like oh no my headphones died good thing they have a plug on them plug them in they'll be like you don't want your headphones to fail you that's why you got to get geico sometimes like uh companies have ads and it's like they don't like no no one needs like an oil company ad like you're not gonna like buy your gas differently because you saw a good exxon ad i saw a good year tire ad and i was like what are they getting to like what i think it's supposed to be like there's some study about it but you just have to like market like you just have to

be in the general consciousness they want you to be a part of the conversation which is fucked so then when you go to get tires and you're like the guys like which one do you want you're like i guess i'll go good tire i don't know anything about what i've seen their commercials 7 000 times good year used to be scandalous tire company yeah what was their tires like blowing up or like their tires were like killing people they were making them out of human flesh they were like radicalized. Out of the babies that the liberals aborted. The grown up babies that were being aborted by the liberals. They were using Benjamin Button's leathery flesh as tires.

They hate the death penalty unless you're a 10 year old baby. Who's fixing to be made a tire. They just curl up a fucking fourth grader as a very late term abortion. I love the nuclear family. Me too. I can't get enough of the nuclear family. If you love the nuclear family

so much, why don't you have one? Why aren't you married, little sass? I don't know. You should get married. Don't throw things in my general direction, please.

I know. I just prefer that. I get to that time of the year. I guess there's just something weird about me. I just prefer people don't throw things in my direction. I get to that time of the year. I guess there's just something weird about me. I just prefer people don't throw things in my direction. I get to this time of year where I just want to start throwing shit. It is getting darker quick and it's settling in bad.

Because it gets to the nighttime and I'll be walking around the office at 3 p.m. And it's dark out. So I'll take, I'll pick, I picked up a huge beanbag chair yesterday and threw it at Spider. But he's the one person who will get down with my shenanigans with me. He'll get down with anyone. Spider, I don't really know what Spider does, to be honest. He has incredible vibes. I just see him get down with my shenanigans with me he'll get down with anyone spider i don't really know what spider does to be honest he has incredible vibes i just see him walking around just causing shenanigans yeah going up just bumping arms with everybody and that's what he's here for he's like when there's like a dog in the cancer ward yeah yeah yeah

it just makes everybody feel better he does just go up and like pet spider it is great and i honestly like he could do any job he fits in with everybody he does just go up and like pet spider it is great and i honestly like he could do any job he fits in with everybody he does i've long said that he has the highest emotional intelligence in the office yeah he probably does he's always good vibes folks game time is the exclusive ticketing partner of barstool sports game time is a ticketing app that makes it easier than ever to score last minute deals on tickets to sports concerts and shows, and they guarantee the lowest price. Whether you're a real fan like me who loves to go to Eagles games and Phillies games or a fake fan like Sass who likes to go wherever the wind blows and will root for any team that likes him just a little bit,

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Lowest price. Guaranteed. You keep to yourself, though. I do. You're one of the most humble, reclusive, unapproachable members of the office. But I don't think, and I think you're misunderstood. You're misunderstood because of that. No, but I like that.

Yeah, that people don't want to come up to you. I see people come up to me to be like, should I ask him if he can do a video? And they're like, no, let's ask someone else it has gotten to a critical mass of takes dude is so annoying there's 15 people that will come up to you every minute of every hour what's your favorite uh type of water bottle do you like the skinny ones or the big ones and they're like and then i'll be like i like the skinny ones they're like dude could you make it funny name three people that, name three celebrities that you would drink water with. Yeah. It's like, what the fuck are we talking about?

And then you see it posted and all the comments are like, Barstool needs to rot in hell. Like, this is it? This is the one. I'm unsubscribing now. Yeah, yeah. They posted one that was like, things for men. What's something that's for

the boys and i was like puss i said pussy and then all the comments are like bunch of fucking misogynist pieces of shit and it's like dude you like i don't that's why i don't want to be doing i don't want to be people asking me these questions it's lose lose it's lose lose if you want to be shit on the internet one of them that has been like all right this is gonna this is gonna actually work this one's gonna this one's gonna help the company a lot yeah if you want to get shit on you'll just post one of your stand-up clips i will yes if you want that for yourself i wanted that which you which you fucking don't but i think it's because all these brands just have like somebody that they're like dude we need to get our fucking tiktok pop Yeah. And they'll just.

Newsflash. TikTok is it's out. Is it? It's gone. Yeah. Now everybody's just on that shit where you take of the hour. Everyone's on be real. That's my.

That shit is so lame. That's my main networking app. Yeah. It's just like taking a picture of my fucking shitty dinner. Like seven months from now, someone will atstool will send out an email being like, we need to be on Be Real. We got to get on Be Real. The fact that Barstool is not on Be Real right now

is shocking. It's horrific. I think they gave it to Clement, to be honest. I think that was one of Clement's first things is when he started, he got the login for the Barstool Be Real.

Oh my God. That's why I think it was his fault. I'm like, I'm probably wrong, but I really don't think that everyone needs to be on every single form of social media

to be successful. Everyone at every time needs to you dumb but then there's people that are doing that and they're more successful than me and our podcast mean girls i don't know all right i was gonna say i don't know numbers of success but they are doing better than us in what way well that's they're also uh posting like suggestions of pussy on uh only fans i just like i don't know i i just like don't want to do that you don't want to bust it open on a fucking paywall website no i just don't want to like have to be like all right well we got it oh fuck rome come over we didn't do the be real for today we gotta like people have been successful without doing that yeah i mean it it also is a good ass way to burn the

the candle to the fucking wick real fast oh yeah oversaturation bro it's a thing or just like your brain feels terrible and you feel like a existential dread of going into your work or having to do any of the little shit that like is part of your job it's like uh this is supposed to be a fun ass fucking job dude like if if you're just like fuck like what's my take on gambling of week seven of hockey or some shit like that it's like i don't have a take i just don't have a take on this you don't need to have a take on everything you don't need to have a take on everything i'm fucking empty of takes i'm devoid of takes i'm done i'm done doing takes they tried to get me they tried to put me in a fucking costume the other day for what i won't say yeah i won't say but i said i'm not doing that and i'm i don't say no i always

do the takes they always cut me out of them i think i don't know you give them a soft no you're like no i don't say no i'm like yeah sure i'll do it and then i do it and then i put my headphones back in but giving them a shit take starting in like five minutes and someone comes over like can you just hop in this video real quick i just need to put you throw you in a costume no and i was like like one of those costumes and the people are all like shirtless and i was like dude i'm never i've my main rules i don't go shirtless on camera i saw that wait and they're all like their faces were painted red yeah they tried to throw me in there and they're like

it's gonna take five minutes and I was like guys screaming at the top of their lungs jumping upside down Ben Mintz like stumbled out like Ben Mintz stumbled out of the room like he was in a training exercise for Navy SEALs and he just got like tear gassed yeah he was just like wiping the red paint from his eyes

no yeah I was not gonna be you just do something really quick from his eyes. No, yeah, I was not going to be. Can you just do something really quick? I was not going to be in the car. I mean, I don't know. Depends on what it's for. We got this new taser that we want to do an ad for. Yeah, yeah. We need you to get shocked.

Can you just do a quick dance for us? We have this Lockheed Martin ad where you need to get shot. Geez, just do a quick dance. You know how to gritty. Come on. The TikTok commenters are going to hate you. There's this new dance. It's going to be great. It's called flossing. Yeah.

Just floss. Just floss. Do the Fortnite dance. Yeah. Come on. We're going to post this on the main page. Everyone will make fun of you and DM you to kill yourself. This is going to be good for us. If you died, it'd be good for the company. Yeah. Think about the t-shirt sales. Yeah. Can you give us the socials? Can you give us the social passwords so after you die we can post your airbrushed t-shirts? Yeah. Can you give us the socials? Can you give us the social passwords so after you die

we can post your airbrushed t-shirts? Yeah. Come on, we're printing new shirts with your face on them. And the day you died, which we assume will be tonight. Yeah. After you see this awful feedback to you trying your hardest. If you can get it before 8

before they launch, that would be awesome. The merch team wants to know what kind of coffin you want. We're trying to get it sponsored. We have these Gildan coffins. Yeah, we're trying to get... They actually shrink if you leave them out for too long. I know your mom wanted you in the suit, but we're going to throw you in a nice Gildan tee. Sleep on your dead hoodie.

Sleep on your dead hoodie. all your dead hoodie with some shady rays on basically forever oh my god that's devastating but also eerily true oh it's true and i this obviously i was obviously an over uh an overreaction how so so? It was an exaggeration, I mean. I don't think so. I think we're just riffing. Don't fact check yourself, bro. Bro. Bro. So I think I'm going back to Denver's calling my name. I have a gambling competition there this weekend. I can get you a free ticket there. I'm

fucking around. I'm actually, I'm doing pretty well. No, I will go. I will go to Denver this weekend, though. When is it? It's this weekend? Yeah. You just missed your chance. No, you're doing pretty well. I meant in terms of I'm not going to kill myself. I understand.

You're going on Sunday? The competition is on Sunday. When are you staying until? Saturday, Sunday, Monday morning. We do. You leave Monday morning? Yeah. Why?

Well, I mean, you could leave whenever the fuck you want. No, I can't. I was going to say i would go sunday monday leave tuesday you can probably yeah i gotta be here i gotta be here get it do what son of a boy dad dude they need me for tapes jesus what don't you get dude you we could have a good time in colorado it would be so fun i could see my friends yes you could see your friends we could have a good time in colorado it would be so fun i could see my friends yes you could see your friends we could have some fucking you're not going anywhere this weekend yes i am i'm going to minnesota that's this weekend yes dude you travel too much i know it's burning me out i was in the airport for 10 hours on fucking sunday my flight kept on getting delayed they're

like we don't got a pilot they're like our pilot fell ill so now we're gonna uh we'll let you guys know when we hear back and then like they're like three hours later like all right one hour until board it's just some drunk bastard who didn't want to come into work that day motherfucker pilots are all pilots are young as fuck right now i know i don't trust them you either get aborted at 10 or become a pilot yeah i want an old pilot who's flown it like has spent more time in the air than he has on the ground yeah someone who's handsome as hell who has like some defined but refined lines in his face and like a coif of beautiful brown hair yeah that's what i want

it does take a lot to become a commercial uh airline flyer though i think you need like a thousand hours of flying fuck i forgot maybe probably more honestly got into your wheelhouse of flight yeah yeah we did damn it yeah i need to i need to pivot off a flight before you start rattling off some fucking some factoids about the fucking boeing 777 i know but i did see a boeing 747 at jfk and those things are fucking huge. It's my first time seeing one. You said you saw a plane? Yeah, I saw it on the runway.

I can't stress this enough. I don't care. No, dude, you should because they're fucking massive. Is it a double-decker? The front of it is a double-decker. Damn, I wonder what the upstairs is like. I think that's where the first class is. We need to get on one of those. I know. They're fucking huge.

We should start doing plane tours like Casey Neistat. Yeah. We need to put up some Neistats before that. Now that Neistat's back in fucking NYC. Is he? Yeah, dude. No way. He's back in the city. Damn.

I saw him the other day at the bodega. No, you didn't. Yeah. You know who else is back? Diddy. Diddy's back in the city too. Diddy's in town tonight. I noticed that.

Yeah, Diddy's in the city. I could sense it when I woke up. I was like, is Diddy here? Is Diddy here? Is Diddy in the city right now? What the fuck that yeah did he's in the city sense it when i woke up i was like is diddy here did he here did he in the city right now what the did he must be in the city i was like did he and nice dad in the city at the same time is new york back dude uh ob said that he took a picture of uh diddy and and uh it was while it was on it's on diddy's instagram actually you like this picture yeah yeah it's him uh a blunt, like leaned up on a cop car with like the American flag hanging in the background. Obes said that after Diddy saw the picture, he was like, he came up to Obes and he was like, Yo, you just became a millionaire.

You just became a millionaire. Why? Because he said the picture is like so sick and it's iconic he's like i own half of it but you just became a millionaire that's hilarious yeah it's like how how did i become a millionaire by taking this picture that you posted on your instagram without giving me credit yeah yeah no doesn't he usually tags obes does he yeah i think so well maybe he gave him credit but it is funny to tell someone he usually tags obes does he yeah i think so well maybe he gave him credit but it is funny to tell someone so crazy that obes is just like his photographer yeah that he's just around him at all times at all times and that he like trusts him yeah that's so weird about him how'd he get that gig uh from the same this dude frankie frankie santella who

used to manage this group in philly called Ground Up, who Mook knows. And Frankie Santella was the one who I first talked to about bringing Million Dollars Worth a Game in here. So the reason Frank, since me and Frankie are friends, that's how Million Dollars Worth a Game is at Barstool. And then he also just kind of linked up with Diddy some years before while he was just doing all that shit. So you introduced that guy? A million dollars worth of game to Dave and all of them. Wait,

what about Obes? You lost me. Obes used to roll with the ground up dudes that this guy used to manage. Obes went to Temple. Ground up is a group from Temple.

This guy, Frankie, is from Temple. It's all Philly shit. Damn. So did you hook that up? What? Obes with Diddy? No, no, no.

Frankie did. You got lost early. I got lost. It was a bunch of names. You were throwing out a lot of names. I know. Frank. Frankie.

Ground Up. Ground Up. But I mean, the Philly heads will be going crazy thinking about this, dude. Ground Up. Ground Up is great. Ground Up was legendary, dude. And Obes was in it? He was there.

He did a lot of photography and videography for them. Damn. It was like his first movie. So he went from Ground Up to Diddy. Obes did and Frankie did. They both worked with Ground Up and then they both worked with Diddy. That's pretty crazy. That's a pretty big jump.

Yeah. It was great. I mean, Ground Up was big too, though. Ground Up was huge in Philly at the time. Ground Up's classic, dude. But Diddy, I mean, ground up's classic dude but diddy i mean diddy's diddy diddy is diddy but i'm still trying to get him on the pod i want to hear that fucking uh the mute the new music dude diddy's been working on this new music for so long you're

gonna go see him is he live tonight no it's the phillies in the playoffs oh shit fucking sixers season openers tonight and lakers season openers tonight, dude. Oh, you're a Lakers fan now. I'm just watching for Pat Bev. Oh, okay. I mean, I... Just take that note. Oh, so you can have 18 teams and I can't have fucking two that I just watch?

I don't claim to be a big fan of any of them. Yes, you do. Except for the Bills. I am part of the Bills mafia. And the Eagles. Shout out Gabe Davis. That's my brother. And you always wear a Cowboys shirt.

Okay, I will say I didn't know that the Eagles and the Cowboys had like a... They were like rivals's like the one that's like the red socks and the yankees yeah i didn't know that that's like until i watched the game and they were like this has been a rivalry for 20 years and i was like oh shit yes dude people are hitting me up being like my sweatshirt off they're like people are like you let Sass wear a cowboy sweatshirt? I mean, that's on you, to be honest. I know. They're saying I should have ripped it off.

That you should have ripped it off. I didn't know. But I'm scared. I thought it was just another football team. And you're like, why are you wearing another football team's sweatshirt? I didn't know it was like. Their bitter rival. Yeah.

It's their most bitter rival. That's on you, bro. You should have caught me. No, I was scared of what would happen if you had your shirt taken off of you what kind of hulk you would turn into if you fucking were had your shirt ripped off mid off first of all i want to point something out there's no way you would be able to rip that sweatshirt off the stitching is premier especially in the collar especially and there's no way you're getting the collar is double fortified a hefty pair of scissors to get through that sweatshirt that's why they sell it because like it can't be ripped off now it's for

a fan who's going into a hostile environment it's probably for a cowboys fan going to go to philly but the phillies though what about the phillies can you root for them at least yeah now that the mets are out no i did want the mets to win i just wanted to see frank happy dude frank makes me laugh so hard yeah but they're out now right i feel like people Mets are out. No, I did want the Mets to win. I just wanted to see Frank happy. Dude, Frank makes me laugh so hard. Yeah, but they're out now, right? I feel like people are like off Frank being like it's too much. The more Frank, the better. Frank and Jersey Jerry like playing

video games. I was watching like... Where is Frank? He hasn't been here in days. He was here yesterday. Has he taken a couple days off? I mean, he is going through it right now. After that hot ass picture he posted in his bed. Yeah, yeah. He's probably about to start an OnlyFans with his sexy ass. He should.

He'd probably make a shit ton of money. Yeah, honestly, he makes a ton of money on Cameo. Why wouldn't he be able to make a ton of money on OnlyFans? Let's talk about Allbirds. And specifically, let's talk about the Wool Dasher Mizzle. Allbirds weather-rellent performance running shoe. Keep your feet warm and dry with the weather repellent Wool Dasher Mizzle shoe from Allbirds.

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That's such a good name. Discover your perfect pair at Allbirds.com today. That's A-L-L-B-I-R-D-S.com. Now let's get back to the show. Now let's get back to the show. Dude, I went to a restaurant this past weekend. It was a relatively nice restaurant. And it's a restaurant where they ask you your, like, they, like, print out your name when you come in.

And it's like they have a file on the people that go there. So I went to the front door and I was like, they're like, what's your name? Ferone. Like, oh, Anthony. Like, welcome back. I was like, ah, it's actually not Anthony. It your name Ferone like oh Anthony like welcome back I was like ah it's actually not Anthony it's it's Adam Ferone and then uh they're like okay come

on in I got to the front desk and the next lady's like oh Anthony and it's like fucking packed and buzzing and three other people kept on me like Anthony like passing it down the line where I couldn't correct them I felt like snapping but I was so,

I was just, it was like a restaurant that's nicer than I am. It's nicer than I, so I was like trying to fit in and they even, they sent a maitre d' over to the table

and they were like, ah, Anthony, good to see you again. What is so, because he just is your returning customer? I guess because I'm a returning customer,

but they got my name, they got my name so embarrassingly wrong that they just called me Anthony for hours, dude. You should have just been like, hey, you should have hurt you. I think the move there is you got to throw someone up against the wall. It's not Anthony.

Hit him with a James Corden. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen, you fuck. Yeah. It's not Anthony. But after- I haven't heard that name in years. After Pat Bev called me Ron, all these people call me Anthony, dude.

Oh, bro, you're having an identity crisis. I'm deeply disrespected where people refuse to learn my name. I was at a wedding down in Charleston a couple weeks ago. The bride sent a, or I was in like North Carolina, whatever, the Outer Banks. The bride sent a thank you note for me going to the wedding. And she wrote Ron as my name on the thank you note. And I know that couple from home. I went to high school with the groom and she wrote Ron.

Was she fucking with you? No, she wasn't even being funny. I think she was fucking with you. I don't think she was. Maybe she was. I bet she was fucking with me. So she wrote on the letter Ron? She was like, we know Ron's busy, so we appreciate you making time.

So they call you Ron? Yeah. I mean, my friends do. It was like a high school nickname. Fuck, dude. It's not like my podcast name. I don't know. People have rap names and podcast names.

Where do you think it came from? It's your rap name. You think I was like, yo, call me Roan? Yes. No, that was a nickname. People were already calling me that. And I was like, I don't want to come up with a rap name. People were calling me Lil Sass in middle school.

That's how that originated. Yeah, right. My teachers used to call me that. There's probably going to be a bunch of new comedians that come out fucking named, like they use their Fortnite names. Like me. Yeah, exactly. Next generation.

Next gen influencers. Yeah. Damn, Sass changed the game. You are a next gen influencer. You are a next gen personality. God, no, I'm not. Yes, you are, dude. I don't do enough takes for that.

You need to get a coaching tree. I know, I should. Huh? I should. Let's get on it. Who do you want to hire? Who could you put under your coaching tree that I couldn't have any claim to? No one.

Bro, why do you got to stun on me like that? They're happy. Who do you know that I haven't introduced you to? Oh, fuck. who do you know that i haven't introduced you oh fuck like two people my parents probably you know sass yeah did i introduce you to sass you know your son yo this is sass who was i talking to recently about you uh one of my friends he was like yeah bro he's like you hold on to ron dude he's like hold on to that so that's gonna take you far i was like dude fuck off i've literally taken you nowhere now you have now i haven't i just i go home early while you're out fucking

carousing what do you what does it even mean i don't take you anywhere i'll take you to dinner bro you couldn't take me anywhere you couldn't take out the trash in the book i was reading i was going to use a line from the book i was reading but it's sam talent uh running the light he goes he goes you couldn't take me to the movies if you bought me tickets that is a good ass it's a good line right i gotta chuck a line just laughing reading your book yeah that book is good as fuck. Turn the page. It is a page turner.

I was reading it for like an hour and a half last night. I've been carrying around a book on every flight for the last two months, haven't cracked it, but I'm always like, I'm going to read on this flight. Dude, you got to find a book that you actually want to read. I do want to read this book. No, you definitely, if you wanted to read it, you would read it. No, I just- It's as simple as that.

I like being on my phone and watching movies more than books and i'm sorry so would have shakespeare so would any person in history so would fucking you listen to get hot so would james joyce dude no need to get hot on me i'm just saying if you if you wanted to read it you would read it we used to be a book podcast then we turned into a movie podcast and now we just talk about how our co-workers riff now we shit on our co-workers who and who we're fucking envious of. Now we shit on our co-workers. Whose numbies we're envious of. And it's taking us to the top, honestly.

It is, dude. We're growing. Yeah. Did you see our socials up 1% from last week? Well, I don't know about socials, but... I'm kidding. I know we're a top 10 barstool podcast, dude. They're saying that.

Yeah. It is getting around. Someone said that and a higher up said that in a meeting. After Owen left, they're like, well, we got... These are two top 10 barstool podcast, dude. They're saying that. Yeah. It is getting around. Someone said that and a higher up said that in a meeting. After Owen left, they're like, well, we got, these are two top 10.

These are two top 10s, right? These are two top 10 barstool podcasts that we got right here. That's crazy. Meanwhile, I'm solo trying to fucking board than a homeless guy. Top 10, you don't say.

Top 10 out of months 7,000 podcasts dude have you ever looked at our podcast feed I didn't there's something I've never even heard of yeah they post an episode like once a year there's one about like the union soccer team yeah dude what the fuck we have so does it cost money to like put a podcast

on a feed it must not I just think it would cost money to give up the feed so we keep them is my guess why would it cost money to give up the feed so we keep them is my guess. Why would it cost money to give it up? Isn't that the whole caller daddy thing?

Oh, but that's because I feel like most of our dormant ones on a feed are just because we haven't because they like suck. Yeah. Because they were like shitty and like fucking fell down

to it like nobody had enough of an interest to keep it going or make some cash off of it. That is crazy. People just stop. I mean, I've stopped multiple podcasts. What is that conversation like?

Like, let's fuck. I don't want to do this anymore. Peter's out. Yeah. So is it kind of just slow? Let's not do an episode of this week. And then you're like, maybe next month. Or they're like, we're taking resources off or like or like Francis is getting fired.

Kayla's moving. Something like that., we're taking resources off. Or like Francis is getting fired. Kayla's moving. Something like that. The co-host is gone. Yeah. Shit like that. This podcast will never die, though. Yeah, this is going to go until we're dead. Yeah.

And then we'll pass it down to someone. Yeah, exactly. It's like a franchise. They're going to call it Starting Nine. Is that what it is? Yeah, Starting Nine. It's like Starting Nine. It'll be exactly like Starting Nine.

It'll be like the daily show it will be we'll pass it down to Trevor Noah or some shit like that we'll get some like South African dudes I think Trevor Noah

will be good on this I don't know should we have him on I don't know if he could really run with us I don't know if he could run with the bulls yeah

the way that Soder does later on in this episode the way that Soder does coming up next fucking shit how long actually how long in are we should we just end it there 35 we have 35 for Soder in this episode. The way that Soda does coming up next. Fucking shit. How long, actually,

how long in are we? Should we just end it there? 35. We have 35 for Soda and 35 for us right now. It's an hour time. What do you want to do? Do some ads. Do some ads.

And then we'll be coming up next with that Soda interview. And you guys are going to fucking go absolutely ape shit over this shit. Listen to the Pat Bev and Roan podcast. What's it called? The Pat Bev podcast with Roan.

They keep on referencing it on like, it was on like First Take this morning or some shit. Yeah, it's going viral. It's everywhere. Fox Sports Show. And they leave out the With Roan every single time. What? Fuck, though. That's disrespectful.

On the Pat Beverly podcast with no one else that sucks dude on the podcast pat beverly does that about all alone you should ask pat if you can switch it around can it be the rome podcast featuring pat bev that would be way doper i think i think you need to start the rome show oh dude nobody it doesn't put asses in the seats no it does a guy did come up to me uh to me on his bike yesterday, and he was like pedaling next to me, just like cheesing, smiling. From the pad, Bev? I just cheesed, smiled.

I didn't know what it was at first. We were just riding parallel to each other, fucking cheesing, smiling down 16th Street. I cheesed back at him, and he just cheesed at me, and I really just thought we were just enjoying two citizens. Yeah yeah yeah just having a good day and i because i have done that i will just like smile at citizens like that like i i have no problem with that but he was like i'm listening to you talk about soaking right now dude oh really freaking podcast that's hilarious is it doing really well uh i guess i don't know it has to be i mean it's been everywhere i don't

really check numbers all over the media all i care about is mainstream is it it's mainstream media yeah i don't know you told me it was on the front page of reddit it was that was fucking crazy it was under nba r slash nba and what's that top of the reddit on the nra on the now not quite national bomb association not quite very i see what you're doing but not quite. National Bomb Association? Not quite. Very, I see what you're doing, but not quite. Damn,

I wish it was. So you and fucking Mook go shoot some more guns. Yeah. No, I've retired for now. From guns? Yeah, and betting.

Why? Went out on top. Honestly, that's the only way to win. I didn't lose any bets this past weekend because, uh,

I didn't bet. Yeah, see, I won all of mine. And now I'm not going to bet until probably Sunday. Oh, wow. You really gave it up. Going to have to bet on the Pats again. You can't be a Pats and the Eagles fan either.

What if I'm a Pats, a Bills, and an Eagles fan? And Cowboys? No, I'm not a Cowboys fan, dude. Pats and Bills are the same type of rivalry that Eagles and Cowboys are. I know. So your four teams are like bitter rivals. But the Bills are so much better than the Pats. Pats look pretty frisky the last couple weeks.

What if the final four teams in the NFL this year... Oh, my teams. Yeah, you should do that Dana Beers-like tour where you just go to these stadiums. I don't have four teams, though. I have... You just said my four teams. I know. I was joking. That's why I was correcting. I don't have four teams, though. You just said my four teams. I know. I was joking. That's why I was correcting myself. That shit's not funny, though.

That shit is not funny. I have the Bills, the Eagles, the Pats. There's an order. There's an order. I have the Bills. I won't say it. The Eagles. There's an order. I'll let you decide who it is. Who's on top.

It better be the Eagles brother or work turn in only one of those teams has invited me into their home and Dave and Buster and Dave and Buster

what are you talking about the dude the Eagles came to your show before the Bills did did they now this summer remember I told you yeah

but they never came they didn't chill well they were in training camp they weren't staying at their houses. They were probably staying at a worse hotel than you were. Look, dude, you can't get mad at me. I can't get mad at you. I'm still an Eagles fan.

It's still go birds. You're a bandwagon. Bro, don't say that. You are. I'm Philly born and raised. You don't mean this. You're like a golden retriever. You'll love anyone that gives you attention.

I remember when we first moved into Penn State together. I went in and I hung my Eagles flag high and proud. Yeah, but you were a senior and I was a freshman. I hung it high and proud. You were way older than me at the time. And you said, holy shit, you're a Birds fan? And I said, bang, bang, Bird gang. And you said, I'm going to use that and make a career off of it.

No, dude, you have no idea who I stole that from. I stole that from Nicky Sanuti, dude. He's a whole different guy. Like Frankie Santella. All right. We'll see you guys at the Dan Soder show. Thank you. Or not the Dan Soder.

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Yes. And that's the perfect place to wear sunglasses because it is sunny out in Bora. It's sunny in Bora. And you're going to need yourself not even one, maybe two pairs of Shady Rays. Well, how could I get two pairs? You could go to ShadyRays.com and use code SUN for 50% off two plus pairs of polarized sunglasses. Wait, so I could get two pairs and I could get them 50% off? You could get two pairs and you could get 50% off if you use code SUN.

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Baby. Hell yeah. Dan Soder, obviously, in here. What's up, brother? We only have you until 3.30, so we have you for 20 more minutes. Yeah, I don't know why these time restrictions. You guys put me in a holding cell. Bro, that wasn't us.

I feel like I'm being X-Men tested. I know. It was crazy. This is our first time we've had a guest booked. That barstool books for us. And that they've cared about. They usually do not give a fuck about our guests. They'll walk around. Maybe they'll sit in the lobby for

30 minutes. For you, they threw you in a box. I told you guys, the old barstool offices, when I'd come in to do KFC, I'd get high and they would just have you sit out in the middle of everyone and i would just be there in a wrestling t-shirt with my back to everyone sucking on a coffee being like this is fucking awkward dude i can't imagine that old office looked intimidating because you just opened the doors and everyone was right there right

you come off the elevators and it's just you're there it was one room it was like being at an apartment where like a studio apartment where like 18 people live like and you don't really know your roommates and shit like that but you could tell i'm such like a child of an own of a single mom because when they where they sat me i was like looking with stuff to play with i was like oh what's this just like looking at fucking bobble heads and shit i I was like, oh, this is fun. Just spinning a football. Yeah, then Kevin would come and get me and I'd be like, oh, I was, you know, I was making

my way. I saw you in that fucking solitary confinement, nothing to play with. And it was a contract on a table. Oh, was it really? Yeah. I swear to God. I walked in and there's a release, a pen, a water. Do I get to meet my public defender?

Yeah. What the fuck? We found a body. Why do they do that? You're linked to a murder. Because we have a green room and so I don't know that maybe there's somebody else in the green room. I don't know if we... Like the rock. Yeah. Who is a more heavy hitter than you? I mean, I don't know. I don't even

I'm actually, this is where my ego is. I'm fine with that. This is nice. I think I would have just rather stayed in the i think i would have just stayed rather stayed in the lobby i don't know i it was it was one of those things i think phones are so great now that you're just bare your head in the settings app yeah like what's going i'm gonna look at the odds for everything what's my brightness at right now what were the last four places i went on google maps yeah it is easy as fuck to go like eight hours in the phone and you just you just

eat the time up and yeah you pay no attention to anything have you ever been in an uber and they go the wrong way while you were looking at your phone no but i've heard you talk about this you're you're a big talk from the back guy no shane put that on me and shit and it's yellow cabs i was very specific because they try to fuck you and And you got to give them the good directions. You got to be like, no, take the river, take East River Drive, whatever. Yeah. I was talking to Shane about this last week and Shane was like, you're a fucking psycho in the back of a cab.

Because when I used to live in Queens, I'd always be like, hey, 59th Street Bridge, upper level, take 21st Street all the way to Astoria Boulevard. Every time. That's what I would say. Yeah. Because if not, they try to go and there's traffic and the meter meter goes up yeah but shane's like you're a psycho and i'm like no i'm i'm being direct and you're trying to save yourself some money dude what are you made of cash no i'm taking a cab it's a luxury yeah that's cabs are the way to go nowadays what's that cabs are the

way to go now they're way cheaper than ubers yeah you know what it's it's like you're uh it's like the hot girl from high school had a kid and then got divorced and then you're like remember when you didn't talk to me in high school she's like i'm on real rough times right now help she needs it but her neediness though is kind of you know sometimes you go like i can call an uber i can just call i could do it right now and that's at the airport that's the move now what is it take a cab because they have the cab stand you don't have to wait you don't think a bus to a parking especially in la god dude the la airport with the fucking shuttle yeah that was one of them i don't think i've ever been that angry in my life like you have to take you to a another location yeah they have to take you to the green room that we put you in that's

great we're gonna lock you up, ask some questions of your whereabouts. A nasty ass interrogation. I don't ever tell an Uber where to go. I've calmed down in my older age. They have the directions already built in to show you which way they're going to go. I've done it though. You have? I got into it

with a guy. An Uber guy? I was like, dude, just take 20. What's your rating? 4.8. That's good. Mine's 4.6. What? Yeah, I don't know. I have no idea why. Do you take a lot of drunk Ubers? By myself. Do you talk to them? Never. I did leave my phone in an Uber the other day, though.

But they can't rate you bad for that. Yeah, they rate you bad when you're a dick. Or late. If you make them wait. I'm late all the time. I'm always late. I order the Uber like five minutes before I even intend on leaving. What's yours? 484. Solid. Pretty solid. I care a lot about it.

I'm not going to have a nice conversation, but I'll be sucking them off, though. I'll be like, thank you so much for picking me up. Thanks for the ride. Have a really good day because I want that rating. We use the same style playbook. I'm very in there like, how you doing? I get very like Senator energy. What's going on?

What are the Uber drivers talking about? I want to get here with the people. Or I start asking them about their shift. Like, how long you been working? You been out here all day? Oh, that's a great one. Did you just start or are you finishing? You about to finish up?

I do that all the time. You know what I do? You guys have the wrong idea. This is the worst. If they're having a conversation, because I want to listen to music, but I feel like such a fucking snob when I just put my earbuds in and I'm like, hmm, I want to listen and look out the window. But if they're on the phone and they're getting off, I go, hey, stay on the phone.

Talk, talk, talk. I go, yeah, talk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, totally. Look at us over here, close to four nines. Exactly. Get down to your mid-fours. And you're probably missing out on rides, totally. Look at us over here, close to 4'9". Exactly. And you're probably missing out on rides. Dude, I think that they exclude

these lower numbers. You might get kicked off the app. I have no problem getting rides. In New York? When I get in the Uber, there's a mutual agreement. No words spoken. Damn, you guys are like a Russian marriage. Yeah, you get in and it's strictly business. No.

I love that shit. You guys are like a Russian marriage. Yeah, yeah. You get in and it's strictly business. I give them a head nod when I go in. Sometimes I do feel like a gigantic pussy when I give them that, like, hey, energy. And they're like, I don't know. Yeah, they don't want to talk to you. Who are you? Why would I talk to you? And you're like, it's pretty hot out today. And they're like, shut up.

That's what I love when they have the guard with this, when cabs have the guard and then the tube coming through for the AC. Yeah, the tube was crazy. Suck on this, you fucking hamster. There's an old Lego Batman game when you get into like a cab and the Joker is driving the cab and he throws this fucking gas into the thing. And that always reminds me of that when you get him when they have that massive to. Yeah, just someone's just going to throw a tear gas and kill me.

I would love that. That would be like what a mysterious death. Because I'm just like I'm afraid I'm just going to die with like such a thud of like Hyatt heart attack. Fucking Charlotte comedy. Everyone's got to be like, he was so funny and never got his chance. I want someone to be like poisoned and trapped in the back of a cab, Joker style.

Mysterious where it fucks with people and they're like, don't ask how he died. Don't even ask. And then they do like a fucking hard-hitting Netflix documentary where it's like, was he asking questions? What did he say? My mom does an interview with a voice modulator and she's like he was a very curious child he was a good boy he was a good boy and he always he always really cared about his family yeah they can't find the

black box of the tax instead it was like he ate candy too late in life. Then he had a heart attack. Yeah, he couldn't stop ordering steaks and ice cream. I fucking love it. He died from milk. I do eat like Kevin McAllister in Home Alone. Yeah, I do too. I love it. I just crushed a fruit roll-up right before we started this. Fucking hell.

You know what I got back into? What? Gushers. Dude, I eat fruit roll-ups and gushers every day because I have them in the office. Yeah. And that's what keeps you strong. Oh, yeah. Dude. eat fruit roll-ups and gushers every day because i have them in the office yeah yeah and that's what keeps you strong oh yeah dude one at one like two of those a day it'll keep you it'll make you resist the urges to have other shitty food you want you want to really go down the

rabbit hole yeah young padwan take him i fucking i tell people on the bonfire and i obviously i'll say on a podcast you know what i love is do you remember catalog candy where like in in middle school you'd have to sell like oh a certain amount like near christmas or like fundraising shit fundraising catalogs yeah that they give to children yeah yeah yeah there's a candy in there called uh frog fudgies and they're like mint chocolate with fudge in the middle and they're shaped like frogs you know i remember this shit from like middle school it's crazy it's that good tossed it out on a podcast and now because of twitter people are like yo my kids selling stuff and i'll just get like i'll get high and get like four boxes yeah

yeah and forget that i bought them and they just show up at our apartment and my girlfriend's like dude what the fuck because i don't tell her she's like, dude, what the fuck? Because I don't tell her I'm ordering it. She's like, more catalog candy? And I'm like, fuck yeah, dude. This whole room. And I'm just eating fucking frog fudgies. That's crazy that they're still around. Dude, it's great. Frog fudgies?

Yeah, dude. I've never heard of that. If you like mint chocolate. I do. They're like the height of science chocolate, where you can tell it's not real chocolate. But my problem is I'm not a chocolate. When I'm eating candy, it's something that chocolate but i'm not a shot i don't when i'm eating candy it's it's something that was made in a lab love it i love science yeah why

wouldn't you go near it why are all these people trying to go organic totally the future is science food we're moving away from that there's probably people dying on the cacao farms down in cabego or whatever dude we got meanwhile sass is gonna be like wolverine because he's been eating fruit loops for two fucking uh fruit rolls for two exactly just crushing that i i when i was younger i used to get this uh i would go to like the candy store and they had this just like this toothpaste bottle and inside of it was just like it's that red it's that red sparkly gel sugar gel yeah i know what you're talking about. Damn, dude. You're just walking around with it all day. You're a moon man.

Yeah, walking around with all that, just sucking on that thing. What's the one you dip in sugar? Oh, yeah. It's like sugar that you dip in sugar. What's crazy is candy gets you ready for adult addiction. And then when you get out of adult addiction, you go back to candy. Yeah, it is. I swear to God, when I quit drinking, I didn't give a fuck about candy from 18 to 29.

And then at 29, I was like, I love it all, dude. It's a safe landing spot. Anything sweet. A guy we work with just said that he bought his baby son a 12-pack of apple juice, and then he just crushed it all himself. Hell yeah. A 12-pack. Hell yeah.

Jersey Jerry crushed a 12 pack of apple juice. That's so much. I could drink a fucking pint glass of high C. A pint of high C. You could just fucking drain ecto cooler and the whole thing and I would just be on ice. Are you in better shape now

off the sugar than you were off the booze? I mean on the booze I started getting real puffy yeah yeah because when you when you put in long hours you start to of course no i have puff up and then i got i quit drinking and smoking pretty quick and i fucking tightened up and then pandemic it's i started getting like fucking near 40 titties and belly and being like so now i'm starting to starting to curb it finally because it was too fun yeah it was too fun eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches at like one that's the problem is

you grow up and you're like oh i think all these foods are good for me because this is what my mom gives me every single day and then you're like i've been eating like shit 20 years straight you have real sugar your body doesn't know how to process it now my friends are getting diabetes like nate margetzi had to like get off sugar because it was becoming a thing because they'll give you like a ticking clock on your life they'll be like yeah you have 10 years or you can keep having the fun dip and i'm starting to have like slight pains you know what and when i'm on the road i buy something uh sour and something chocolate yeah and then that's what i'll eat every night when i go back i did the i i buy i buy something sour and then like chips like a big old bag okay you go savor i go i go salty and sweet because

then you go back to your room and you're just like i want to go booze i want to go booze every friday night drinking on the road and you're gonna see this when you go on the road people want to show you their city yeah they're like you ain't never done buffalo and you're like and you sometimes end up in fucking crazy spots where you're like i did not know louisville could be this fun yeah and then the next day you're like i'm suicidal because i have no water in my body but yeah it became and then so now my treat is like i'll go home and fucking if they got like a 25 shitty movie fuck it i would have gone to the bar anyways Yeah you're saving money by watching this shittiest

Movie of all time Any gems that you saw recently at hotels Where you're just crushing some sour shit Oh yeah I mean there's some real Bad movies out there but there's one Escape Room the entire franchise Oh yeah yeah yeah It's like makes Final

Destination look like a Kubrick movie Yeah it's great it's the it's like makes final destination look like a kubrick movie yeah it's horrific horrific yeah yeah my we went my girlfriend and i were in seattle for niners seahawks and then after the game i was like staying for a show and i was like what's on i don't want to go out in seattle like what's on the tv and it was that and i was like are we about to split this movie and see how bad it is and it was it was fun. One of my favorite memories on the road was I was working Laugh Boston and Nick Mullen was featuring for me. And we went back and watched the Zac Efron EDM movie. Oh, I love that movie.

Dude, I'll tell you right now, I don't think there's been a time I've ever laughed harder in my life. He's a DJ. He becomes a DJ, right? And his body like ODs on Molly. Dude, and then he like DJs the funeral. Like Nick and I were doing him DJing the funeral. And he's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, overdose, overdose.

Wait, he actually DJs the funeral? No, I think it was a thing. Nick Ball and I were like, oh, got it, got it. He uses the dude's last voicemail. Yes. Yeah. Dude, I wanted to become a DJ after watching that movie. I was like, dude, this is-

It was varsity blues for DJ. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's dog shit. You should see it. No, I'm pretty sure I did see it in some drunken stupor. I forgot that movie existed. Yeah, there was like a Thursday night at Laugh Boston. And I was like, should we get food in the hotel?

And then, you know, like Mullen was with me. He's like, what are we going to do? I was like, we can watch that Efron EDM movie. And he was like... That movie's good. It was great. You've seen it? I vaguely remember it watch it with a friend it was bad yeah just like blossoms into him like like the trials of his dj career or something like that he's dying

yeah that's the main part that i remember it's one of those things where he's just like he can't figure out life and then he goes home late at night and he's like, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And his friend's like, you got to be a DJ. And he's like. It starts with him like, boop, boop, boop, boop. Whoa, whoa. I like that sound. Boop, boop. That's got a mix in that.

And he's like, oh, fuck it. Maybe we might be doing something. It, by the way, gives no credit to drugs in that circus. No, no. Which that's all fueled by drugs. The only reason he has fans is because of drugs. Yeah, because someone's pupils are this big the worst beat ever sounds incredible yeah it sounds like angels singing and that like emily rajowski's in it yeah just basically is the girl who's like

you're good at yeah yeah yeah my dead friend thought so too it's fucking horseshit it's so bad it's so bad it's great yeah that's legendary the kid dies it's like they're like in like the living room after like a rave and they're like yo zach's not waking up guys and then it just like cuts to him djing a fucking sold out festival he's like this it wouldn't be this it would be if i wouldn't be here without him dude i love that shit sass did you watch it earnestly when you were... I watched it when I was in middle school and I was like, dude, this movie fucking rocks.

I legitimately was like, I'm going to become a DJ. That's so fucking great. I love that that got people to buy stuff to hook up to your laptop. Oh yeah, 100%. I have one at my apartment. I think those dudes turned into crypto and NFT guys. The guys who were just trying to like

launch themselves into a DJ career. And then some of them probably became billionaires off of it. Probably. Some of them probably got rich as fuck. It's, I'm telling you right now, probably learning DJing at that time was like getting good at golf. Where you're just around a lot of business people.

They're like, I'll do business with you. And you're like, I'm in crypto, and now I got $3.5 million. Yeah, super serious guys in pinstripe suits and shit like that just fucking DJing just doing lines of Molly dude I you I literally thought I was like like I like tried to be a DJ I tried to like make beats how long how long like three months and I was like dude like I'm like I'm like showing my friends that's gotta be yeah fuck talking to you about it i want to talk to your boy that you're like no and they were like they were like dude this sucks ass

in my head i was like no they don't understand yeah yeah one of you guys is gonna od on molly one day and then it's over for you and then i'm gonna be playing a packed a packed out las vegas show yeah oh my god i hope one of you guys ODs on Molly one day. Barely referencing drugs is, it's like talking about football without brain injuries. Yeah, I know. You're like, you have to. It's part of the story. It's the integral thread.

Yeah. No one would listen to that music if they weren't like high as fuck. No, dude. But I think that there are people who drive into work in the morning listening to like the most head thumping like dubstep and edm which i can't i cannot fathom and i've been in the car with someone where they like to listen to like dance music at full volume and it's in like it hurts your brain so badly that's one of those moments where you're just like i'm a better person than

you are you are a bad person all right y'all y'all buckled up and then the car starts. It's like, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. He goes, I was saying, I think the Henderson case is going to go over. You should almost play it

as a power move when you get in. You'd be like, say something. Yeah, what? See where you stand. They drive crazy as fuck, too. Like you're in fucking crank dude i also another

like dj story my when i was like this was i was younger i was in like early middle school my friends were like like dubstep was like the new wave everyone's like dude you gotta listen to dubstep and i thought dubstep was an artist yeah so i went on to apple itunes and i downloaded an album by dubstep and it was just like 30 random ass like electric songs i was like yeah do you guys hear this one like they're like who the fuck is this it was like an apple dubstep that's great they just put together a it was just like now that's what i call dubstep this guy rules when i was in this old i am when i was in sixth grade it was when biggie's ready to die came out yeah and it was like Big Papa was everywhere.

Like even middle school gym when they would like play like basketball or whatever, they would play the Big Papa. And I just remember being like, I love this song. And this black girl in my class was like, is Biggie a person or a group? Said it in front of everybody. And I was like, he's a group? And then it's just like middle school black kids falling out. I'd be like, ah!

I'm in person, I'm in person, fuck! Dude, I felt like that was the definition of throwing a pick and being like, I want that one back. Yeah, he needed it back fast. Immediately. The first day I heard about Biggie was like the day that he died. I think it was in like third or fourth grade. It was a devastating time.

Do you know who Biggie is? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Big fan. No, I actually, I love Biggie. It's crazy though. It's like, there's a thing now called like classic rap where like, if I told you, it'd be like when people told me about like the Stones

or Billy Idol. I'm like, yeah, he's cool, whatever. It's like, I've listened to his shit now. You're like, no, you don't understand. He's fucking cool. I do that with hair metal. Like Big J is six years older than me. So big J will be like this band.

And I'm like, it's goofy to me, dude. Yeah. Boys and makeup with hairspray kicking around. Yeah. It is weird how people that are like age can change, but I'll,

I'll rock a shirt of a rap, like a, like I, I'll rock a shirt of like an old band. And I think people will rock shirts of rappers the same way, like a juvenile shirt. They've never listened to juvenile or anything like that. 400 Degrees changed my life.

I have that t-shirt. The 400 Degrees juvenile t-shirt. It's got like holes in it. Like fucking smoke holes for me. Just smoke and listen in the juvenile. That's one of my go-to when I want to annoy my girlfriend voices. I go, oh you think you can go in the kitchen, huh?

Oh you're going to get away from me now, huh? Oh, you're going to take the dog for a walk because we got to an ornament, huh? Baby, baby, please, baby, don't fight, you know what it is. Drop, drop, drop it like that. I just hit her with woe-dee one time and she was like, don't ever come

in with that again. I think you should. I was like, what's up, woe-dee? I totally think that woe-dee is acceptable and I think it should be coming back. I think you should. I was like, what's up, Wody? I totally think that Wody is acceptable and I think it should be coming back. I think everyone needs to start confusing

their girlfriends and start talking in slang they don't understand. Yeah. I want to talk about Ridge Wallet. Come on. You got a minute, Ron?

Let's talk Ridge Wallet. I'll make one. Ridge Wallet is an ultra slim minimum wallet. It holds up to 12 cards plus room for cash. There's 30 colors, style including

carbon fire and burnt titanium it's made with rfid blocking technology that protects you from digital pocket digital pickpockets pickpockets the pirates the pickpocketing pirates and that always that's been a big fear of yours for a while around i'm terrified that's my only you're always every time you leave the apartment or not the apartment well i guess it was the dorm back when we were at penn state but you would always be like oh dude i'm scared these digital pit pockers they're uh they're they're they're picking yeah the pick pockets all right yeah oh and that's the last and i said hey roan you ever heard of the ridge wallet slim ultra slim ultra slim minimalist wallet i hadn't heard of it at that time and then what'd you do we i went out and got went down to ridge.com and you use code dad for 10 off your order that's what

you did ridge.com and i use code dad for 10 off my order yeah that's exactly what i did i mentioned that you used to lose your keys a lot too you were a little bit of a klutz i was forgetful i was a forgetful but i introduced you you to the Ridge wallet. I introduced you to the ultra slim minimalist wallet, the Ridge wallet, where it secures two to six keys. And let me tell you, if you have more than six keys, get another Ridge wallet because you're going to need two of those to hold all those keys. It organizes your keys in a compact silhouette and fold out for easy access. Head on over to Ridge.com and use code DAD for 10% off your order. Terms do not apply. It doesn't even say that.

I know. Terms and other restrictions do not apply. Terms and other restrictions do not apply. Member FDIC. And back to the show. There's a lot,

there's a lot like throwing around John to people who don't understand John. John is a thick one, especially in Philly, but I think that it kind of has transcended past's finally done it yeah i think it has i remember being explained what a john was by like j-a-w-n yeah and it's just like uh it's like anything it's like the way the smurfs use the word smurf they just like use it for stuff i'm not really

too deep in the smurf world so smart into Smurfs. I Smurf. What if you guys find out about that? I'm super into Smurfing. Soda wears white pants and paints himself blue. He says the word Smurf. I'm deep in the world of Smurfing. There's a big community. No, not a Smurf reference that confident.

It's crazy. I don't think it is. I think Smurfs have transcended society. I think so, too. Yeah. They got to come back. Smurfs should have been bigger than they were. Well, I think they were huge.

They were giant when I was a kid, dude. They were giant when I was a kid. Really? Yeah. They were like Paw Patrol times fucking 10. Paw Patrol is, Smurfs are in a different league than Paw Patrol. Paw Patrol sucks ass. Smurfs is a billion dollar industry

I think it might be I wish it was two billion I wish they controlled the media Smurfs control the media Kanye West is ranting about the fucking Smurfs Smurfs man I would fucking love to know He's like I was taking a meeting with Papa Smurf

Kardashians and the Clintons And the Smurfs Everybody I was taking a meeting with Papa Smurf. Kardashians and the Clintons and the Smurfs. Everybody knows. Everybody knows there's a meeting in Switzerland where the Smurfs is running it. There's a cabal of Smurfs. They got a $5 billion network. $5 billion? $5 billion?

Is that what you just said? You hope there are 5 billion. I'm going to say, I hope it's 10. I want to double your profits. And that's like a foregone era, too. Like, that's probably like old money that, like, with inflation. Oh, you're looking at 10 with inflation. That's like 95.

That scene in the social network where they're like, he's like, when Facebook hits a million, he's like, let's talk a billion. I'd love to see, like, a serious sit serious sit down like at the meeting at the smurfs are you are you being for real he goes i'm smurfing serious we're going for 10 billy smurf right i am we're going for 10 billy are you smurfing me in my ass right now? Are we going for 10 billion? Dude, I love fucking boardroom smurfs. Tent fingering. I'm smurfing for real.

You ever get into Gnomeo and Juliet? You ever see that one? No, but lay it on me. It's a classic. It's Romeo and Juliet, but they're all gnomes. I don't think I could have picked that up. They're all garden gnomes. I thought, honestly, I thought it was a regular lady fucking a gnome.

Because they love to do that and shit. They love to take regular ladies and pair them with you. So if it's a gnome lady, that's true love. No, this is gnome on gnome. Where was this? Where did this occur? This is... It's like a video?

It's a movie. It's called Romeo and Juliet. What are you not picking up? It's a movie. It's called Gnome Young Juliet. What are you not picking up? It's a full length feature film. There's two houses and they're next to each other and they both have gnomes in the yards. But there's one side that's red and one side that's blue. And a couple of the- Rep your set.

Crip shit. Rep your set. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't use the letter B in this garden. We don't use the letter B in this garden. We don't use the letter G. Yeah. Dude, that's great. They're like, the flowers are cluming.

The G's are silent. We don't use B. Slob ass gnomes. Dude, that's great. You know that was the original idea. Yeah. Oh, we got to make this work. Yeah, yeah.

They got Papa Gnome.ome caught him slipping dude yeah one of the gnomes slid on papa gnome dies i ain't mark ass buster what garden you from garden you from dude quit playing quit playing dude i'm gonna look that up. I'm going to watch the full trailer. No, you watch the whole movie. I will. It's a good ass movie. Sass, I'm not playing around. It's a good movie. I'm going to Charlotte this weekend. I will. I'm going to fucking watch Gnomeo and Julia.

You should. It's very good. What's going to be funny is if it gets me. I'm like. It will. Watch on the plane. It'll get you. You'll start crying on the plane, dude. Any plane movie. It's easy to cry on a plane movie. I cried at Good Will Hunting on the plane. It get you You'll start crying on the plane Dude any plane movie It's easy to cry At a plane movie I cried at Good Will Hunting On the plane

And it was like My 70th time seeing it Oh yeah And I was like Dude this movie's Actually really sad I have a bit about it But I got

I got opened up Watching Place Beyond the Pines Oh really I've never seen that It's like Gosling And Bradley Cooper It's a But that sad porn though

That's like That's supposed to make you cry Especially if you don't have a dad That one's like built to be like fucking cry cry bitch there's the subliminal advertising under it cry you fucking pussy he left for good reason i was in the middle seat just the lady comes by with like the juice full crying were full crying? I was like, there's just this scene where I was like. No, really? You at the Bills game being like.

Sloppy crying on a plane. But I was like doing this. So I was going like. That is brutal. Brutal. Brutal. I've been lost in a cry where like the two people next to me have to tap me and let me know that

The flight attendant's there because I'm like crying I look up What's happening If I know what's happening I'll like act Like I'm napping and do the cowboy thing Where I put my hat over my nose but in reality I'm like What the fuck

It's a cars Jesus Christ The gnomes are uniting. They tied their bandanas. And then raised their hands. The one is in a wheelchair now because he got shot in his spine. He lost his football scholarship. He should have zigzagged.

Crying on planes, dude. It's humbling. It is super humbling. he should just remake every movie with the gnome i'd love that shit dude i would absolutely love titanic in a bathtub yeah yeah yeah significantly more thorough yeah oh yeah you're right i guess it can't be every movie but the travel gnome was creepy that's what's going to be hard for me to remember when they did like Expedia. Oh, yeah, yeah. It was their mascot in all the commercials. It was just like pop up places.

It was creepy. Gnomes inherently are creepy. Yeah. Travel gnome. Yeah. He's like big on like, you know, he was like, what do they call that? Yeah, the mascot. I went to like I was in Ethiopia for a wedding and I went to the nicest hotel in Ethiopia

and it was the whole lawn was the most elaborate gnome setup that i'd ever seen in my life it was like a football field of all gnomes like mixed it at this like very high-end hotel like it was just one guy's thing where he's like do you like my yeah i wouldn't dude i i guarantee you after you watch this movie i would not be surprised if you buy a gnome now that i'm thinking about like i kind of want to live a gnome yeah no where would you put it though you can't have it indoors you need a garden your door yeah put it yeah yeah because no one's stealing a gnome there's gotta be some cool ass gnomes out there that you could get customized yeah custom gnome you get a gnome of yourself oh my god dude i would love to wear a

cone hat yeah a sweet ass one oh yeah dude i don't know if we could uh because gnomes always have beards right oh yeah i think me and sass is a little face bald ass just couldn't fucking pull it off dude i'll get a full before i shave i'll gnome out yeah i'll just take a picture of me in a long blue sleeve shirt with a tall ass red hat and i'm like make this to scale i want this but it's not here you go dude so do you blew a weekend's money on a gnome well worth it was worth it he washes off he watches over my door in my apartment hallway yeah no one's ever gonna see it except for my neighbors who are gonna think i'm weird as fuck yeah the weird lady across the hall with wet hair all the time

who hates me katie if i got gnome snatched i would i would that's war dude i had a house party in high school and my mom had this like little tiny little girl statue yeah yeah yeah and it got ganked someone was just like that's mine damn that's how i got caught and she also she caught it she found it yeah she was like where's my where's my statue out front and i was like what rib statue she's like where is it i was like, where's my statue out front? And I was like, what? We have a statue? She was like, where is it? I was like, fuck it. I don't know. Someone must have grabbed it.

Yeah. And she was always at her boyfriend's on weekends. Yeah. So she was like, yeah? And I was like, I had a party. And she was like, all right. Damn. But she was at her boyfriend's.

It's like, she's traumatized. Sorry you're not here being a slut. Mom? These are like developmental years. I'm going to do something like that. Yeah. I'm going to get crazy. I would have been the person stealing it, though.

I remember going to this beautiful house in in uh cleveland one time and there was like there was a picasso in the house this beautiful awesome picasso and uh i stole like a bird statue from the house and i had it for years it was a beautiful statue but i think they had so many trinkets that uh that they would have never noticed it was missing. Or you got the most important one. Has anyone seen Peepaw's bird statue? That he brought over from Yugoslavia when the genocide was happening? It was just you at your house being like, I delivered pizzas and would put it on my,

I would drive around, it would come flying off. I'm going to tell you right now, that bird led a much better life for you, Steel. It was much more full of a life. Yeah, I freed that bird. That bird got to smell pizza and fly around in your car. Sounds awesome. It shattered, and I glued it back together because I cared that much about the bird, dude.

When it shattered, were you like, fuck, fuck, they fucking got my bird. This nice ass bird. They got my fucking bird dude you should have mounted it to the hood of your car that would have been badass like a like a ben's symbol like a phantom just comes out of a honda that's what it was it was a toyota corolla dude i would have loved to have someone else's imagine being the person like like someone else's bird. Imagine being the person that you stole it from and you just see someone drive by.

Is that my bird? It's mounted on the car. You go, you remember that bird I bought you in Sonoma? Look to your right. Is that it? Just driving by. Glued together. Dude, I don't know what it is about hood ornaments.

My dad was just like a fucking dirt bag. He lived in San Francisco and he had this yellow bug. And he moved north to this lake town and he traded his bug for like the shitty bends like this mid-80s junk bends but it had the hood ornament and he was like so booze brained out that he was like fucking you see that hood ornament mercedes i got a burn i got a benzo yeah yeah you're pushing it And then one of the lake people ripped it off While I was visiting

I never saw my dad get hot He got so fucking mad He's like he's fucking mad That was a 90s ass move It happened in like Mrs. Doubtfire Or something like that You would take This is how bored you were before phones

You would take The Chr, this is how bored you were before phones. You would take- The Chromies. Chromies off tires or pull hood ornaments. Yeah. You'd just like one, two, three, pull. Wait, what is the chrome? Like that keeps the air in the tire. Oh, really?

But they would get chrome ones that you put on top, but you could just screw them off. What's the point of having a chrome one? It just looks cool. Yeah, you just have a bunch of- Chromie wheels. It's like Kanye used to ride. Like, I want to have the car with the chromey wheels. But then you would take them off and be like, whoa.

But yeah, there's nothing you could do with it. Put them on your parents' car. Your dad's shitty Mercedes. Check out that 91 4Runner with chromey. It was awful. Bro, they're texting me saying that they need you. Oh, yeah, you're done. Yeah.

Damn, dude. I'm sorry I went through the proper channels. Yeah. I should have just DM'd you guys. You're coming on again whenever. Yeah, hell yeah. We'd love to have you on again whenever. Plug your dates, bro.

Charlotte, I'm at Comedy Zone this weekend. I don't know when this comes out. Tomorrow. DanSoder.com. I'm going to be Charlotte, Nashville. Got Philly in December. Bell House in Brooklyn, December 10th. Let's go.

Yeah, got two shows at the Bell House. So fuck yeah, dude. Thanks for having me on this. Thanks for coming on. You're a legend. Yeah, you guys are hilarious. No, you are. It's a fun clip.

I like watching you guys' clips. Oh, thank you, man. So they're like, you want to go on Son of a Boy, Dad? I was like, fuck yeah, dude. Fuck yeah, dude. I remember when you guys got introduced for the first time at the Cellar. And I think it was by Shane. Yeah.

And he was like busting sasses balls being like hey sass wants to be a comedian I remember that and he would like tap SD and be like hey can he perform here Shane Shane has got locker room energy all the time yeah especially in that that's essentially the locker room

over there yeah he'll be like hey coach this guy plays football shut up I totally forgot about that I was so pissed I remember that yeah he was coming from like Yeah, where he'd be like, hey, coach, this guy plays football. Sass is like, shut up. I don't fucking do it. I totally forgot about that. I was so pissed. I remember that. Yeah.

He was coming from like Caroline's or something. And no, wait, you had written your name on the table. And he's like, hey, he wrote his name on the table here. And she came over and wiped it off. If I'm going to be honest, that kind of culture has to come back to the cellar. You need to be, it used to be the most terrifying place in the world. I lived here. I was like doing comedy in New York for like five years before I got

passed there. Yeah. And I would like, I wouldn't walk by it. I would go like around, I'd go down sixth Avenue to go. Yeah. Cause I was like,

yeah, I get tore up like Keith Robinson, Bobby Kelly, all those guys that come in and Keith would be like, why are you here? Open Micah, why are you here? And I'd be like, I want to watch the show. I like Greg Giraldo. And they'd be like why are you here open mic oh why are you here and I'd be like I wanted to watch the show I like Rick Giraldo and they'd be like you're bugging me

when I auditioned Bobby Kelly is the one that recommended me and I went and sat down and Keith was there and he's like oh Bobby your friend's bugging me he's like he's too nervous Esty's gonna sit down his fucking head's gonna explode and i was like that's fucking bugging me is as low-key insulting as fuck bugging me i got bugging me yeah shout out keith he's getting healthy again but keith pre-stroke would fucking rip through you like a samurai sword hell yeah keep that alive yeah dude but that's i like that i like shane's right we need to bring that back totally yeah makes sense fear yes dude it inspires that good ass comedy. It probably does. It really does.

Yeah. Makes sense. Yeah. Cause you see people walking around. Some people that are cocky. You're like, no one's told you yet that you stink. There's like, there's people at the cellar that I watch where I'm like, no one's been like, why do you do that joke?

That's an old joke. I did that at skank fest. I love skank fest is a blast. Yeah. But probably there. Yeah. You just got back. I got back. I was in at Skank Fest. I love Skank Fest. It's a blast. Yeah. You were there? Yeah. You just got back? I got back.

I was in Vegas. I should have talked about that. I was watching like Pauly Shore do like 80s bits. He was like, you know, men go out to get laid and women go out to dance. And all these like hardcore comedy fans were like, yeah. Yeah. And I went up there. I was like, fuck all of you, dude.

You gave me so much shit for all this year. And you're just letting the weasels. You're going to let the biodome. Yeah, but shout out to Pauly Shore. Encino man fucking rules. Yeah, he's a legend. He is a legend. So funny.

But it was fun to watch comedy fans and be like, yeah, we got to start calling each other out more. You have to. It keeps everyone honest. Yeah. People, yeah. Locker room accountability. Keep the locker room.

Locker room accountability, dude. Shane's going to be there whipping our ass you guys rule though thanks for having me on appreciate you brother thanks for coming in appreciate it