Son of a Boy Dad - The Tickle Monster | Son of a Boy Dad #381

Episode Date: March 5, 2026

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If the numbers for the podcast are higher on Monday than usual, I'm going to be. Wait, let's start recording. This would be, this would be funny on this podcast. On this fucking close. They definitely won't be. That will be the dagger that I put in my own neck. I'm telling you right now. I'm telling you they won't be the same numbers.

The numbers are higher on the Franlis podcast. No, the funny thing that you said was that we're like, I'm sure that you and Sass have some catching up to do. Yeah. The fact the idea that we're going to catch up while you're not here. Well, it's been a long time since we did an episode of the pod that was the original cast. Yeah, well, we don't have catching up. They don't have shit to know.

That was the whole reason that we added you to the show. We ran out of everything that we're caught up. It's because we have nothing to talk about. We're fully caught up. Trust me. All right. Should we get into it? Let's.

Disass did a hamstring workout today. Whoa. And my hams, Miami's aren't in bad shape. You hear a fucking violin fucking cord. Yeah, literally. I'm concerned about you. Imagine, imagine what would happen to Harry if he tore a hamstring. That's what it felt like this morning.

And I'm talking through. Yeah, that's what it felt like today. Like, they're going to have to pull them back together. Yeah, that would be so bad. They're tight. He's got his first deadlift. He felt the pop. You're deadlifting?

Well, I did a deadlift with the hex bar, which is not really. That's real. Yeah, but it's easy. I feel like it's easy. to have good form with that. Okay. What do you mean? Well, I would never do just a straight barbell deadlift.

Fine. I think that's fair. I'm just saying that like what you're, you're trying, you're minimizing that lift. And I think that that's a, that's a good lift. The heck. Yeah, I love doing that. 45s. So 135?

Great. Didn't feel great. How many did you do? I did three sets of eight. Great. Well, that was the goal. He said it sounded like a car back firing every time he bent up. over.

Oh, man. Your back is going to hurt. No, it wasn't the back. Because I do good forms. I don't want to hurt my back. You don't round. Don't round. Yeah, yeah.

How do you not round? Because your back is... Is round? Yeah. You stick your ass out as far as you can. Your back looks like a high lie stick. Yeah, but it's a question mark. My back rounds in an area that no one else's back rounds.

It's not the lower back that's rounding. It's the upper back. But I did like... I did the treadmill and then I was like, I'm gonna, the gym was empty. So I was like, I'm gonna do some deadlifts. Nice. And I did the first set and I did like eight. And I did it pretty quick.

It was easy. And then I put it down and I was like, I was easy. And then like within four seconds, it was like, it was like someone took an ice pick to the back of my ass. Like just two straight in my hamstrings. And I had to just like slowly walk around for like 10 minutes. It'd be like, oh, that doesn't feel good. But he won't stretch. He's refusing to stretch.

Yeah. He's got a stretch. I don't stretch. Did you stretch before? before you did it? No. Oh. So dumb.

At least, I mean, at least getting out there. This is, and I don't, I mean this sincerely and in a non-condescending or patronizing way. Yeah, of course. This is the difference in being 36, 37. Oh, yeah. To 24 is stretching. Yeah, no, I don't stretch ever. Yeah.

I don't know how much stretching I did when I was here. I didn't care about it that much. Now it's more important than the stuff I do in the day. Yeah, that's what everyone says. Rhone does like, don't you do like an hour of stretching a day? I'd had it. and I was on a 230-day streak and I fucking

I lapsed. I like woke up at the middle I woke up at 1215 I was like I did stretch I logged on to the app and the streak was gone Oh no disappointing dude

I fuck that It was so nasty But I love it I mean it is the best Being limber I still feel like I'm not limber Yeah I The hammies are definitely feeling tight

Was able to power through The rest of the set though Thank God I need you to give us a clap Oh yeah I didn't even So you lifted too You got to work out in I'm sorry

What is it? What's happening here? All right, welcome back to the son of a boyd podcast. It's what is it? March 3rd Mine says February 26th That's a little while

I think that's off It is off I think it's the third I don't have my phone It's got to be the fourth I left it at home today We're not going to worry about it right We're not going to worry about that

I think it's March 3rd It's Tuesday of this week Oh, my shit is dead. Yeah, mine was dead too. Dead is crazy. Whatever time, this is 303? Is it 303?

Yeah. Not bad, okay. It's 303 PM. We're live from HQ3. Just talking, just talking shop, talking lifts. Talking our bodies, talking male body positivity. Yeah, exactly. Nothing wrong with it.

Nothing wrong with it. Nothing wrong with vanity lifting either. That's the only way you can be lifting. You got to put 45s on each side of that. no matter what. No, you have to do it for the fudge. I'll just do one set of one if I have to. I got a good lift for you though,

but you're going to have to work up to it. I'm not, let me, like, this is, I'll give you the breakdown of my gym, my gym schedule, because this is the most consistent I've been in years. Great. I just go and I just do whatever. Like, I'll do what I told,

I was telling Nate about it downstairs, says the gym's always crowded, so it's like, you can't even have a plan when you're going in. You just go based on whatever people aren't using. You're like, okay, I guess I'm doing that today. So today was the first day I've had like an actual like full on. Okay, I'm going to do like back and biceps. And of course, deadlifting, which plays into both of those.

And yeah, productive. But I go in and I really just, you know, hit a couple lifts, get some cardio going and I'm out. I love it. I have no problem with that. What's the workout that you want to put him on? So I usually try to do a decent. sending ladder of alternating if you're hex bar deadlifts where I do jumping deadlifts and sort of I guess static deadlifts so I'll do you're in the hex bar you go one there goes my knees back they're

going backwards too five of those and then you just do five sort of yeah and then you do four jumping four regular three jumping three regular two jumping two regular one one I don't hit it. I will say I literally don't think I can do that with just the bar. I do you do that and you try to do it without putting the bar down. Like never never touches the round. Don't take a break. Get all the way through. I like that. Five all the way down to one and do three sets. The five, the number five, like the fives are tough. Why? The jumping deadlets are very hard.

Very difficult. That's where I'm getting a little nervous. But it's how you work on explosive movements. Like if you're trying to explode. I'm trying to explode. Which you do look explosive. I need to, sometimes I'm like, oh, fuck. Yeah, no, I need my explode.

That's why I'm in the gym at all is to get my explosive energy up. I have to sprint up this staircase right now. Yeah. You haven't felt explosive, honestly? I haven't felt explosive? You haven't seemed it. No, no, not. Right now I'm the opposite.

That's the thing is like I don't really under, like the gym is good. But like if I'm going to the gym, like what is the reason that anyone goes to the gym? Exploding. To explode. Exploding. And to hopefully be able to defend yourself when you need to. Which is why I never understood that famous pre-workout the no explode. No explode.

Yeah. What are we talking about? I'm not going to have that. Yeah. Very obvious. I'm trying to blow up right now. Yes, explode. But if I.

I were to go, like if I were to get jacked and then I were to say you go to the gym like five, six days a week and then you get in a physical altercation, I'm going to be sore as hell. My muscles are going to be jello. I've been scared of that before. Like isn't that a major concern? That like I have no explosiveness if I get attacked. Exactly. Please don't come at me.

I'm filled with lactagic acid. Exactly. Exactly that. Like right now, I am the least explosive anyone could be. I'm having a hard time staying awake right now because I went to the gym. So how am I supposed to defend myself in an altercation now? Sometimes it'd be hard to even

escape. Yes. Like if there's like oh somebody came in fucking shooting the shit up and you're like, yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Just waddling down the street. I got a weird feeling somewhere down the line you're going to get into Jiu-Jitsu or something. No.

I think that you're going to get to a point where you're like, whoa, I'm dying. No, no, no. I need to do something... Sass Gracie. I need to do something cultish to really turn things around. Roll.

And you're gonna... I'm not rolling. You're gonna dedicate yourself to it. I go to you rolling. I don't have that any. You're gonna have a doctor's appointment in like five years where they're like... Oh my God.

No, no, no, no. Oh, my... You're 29? He's got cobwebs in there. You have the inner organs of a... No. 97-year-old. I'm on like, I mean, I don't...

I haven't really spoke about it. much, but I'm on like a health journey like you couldn't even imagine. Couldn't imagine. Quit vaping again. Eating a lot of salads and fruits. You know what they say about quitting vaping. It's how many times you do it. Yeah.

Not for how long. Exactly. That matters. Exactly. Back on the pouches. Feeling good. You look good. You look a lot better than I do.

I look like hell. No, you don't. I look like hell. Because you have a light shadow. Because you were a three o'clock shadow? Why? What do you, what are you saying you look like? helpful. I've just been under an enormous

amount of pressure. Enormous amount of stress. You know what helps with that? Vaping. I like that. No, that will give you the craziest anxiety after you've done vaping. I tried to start vaping again. It would be so funny if Francis got into vaping. Oh, I'd love it. Like the most off-brand thing imaginable.

Just, yeah, sucking on a geek bar. Yeah, like a fat one. A really thick one. I'm one of those people where, and I've met a couple other people like this, both vaping and cigarettes. I could never even get through one hit or two. Yeah. Well, that's the thing. It felt like I was being punched in the lung. Yeah.

And it made just coughing hard immediately. I never got that like smooth breakthrough that everyone spoke of. But weed doesn't make you cough? Not at all. That's crazy. I mean, if I take a gigantic, fuck. Right. Like a ginormous dinosaur hit.

If I'm going bongs away. Yeah, yeah, of course. You know. Yeah, really ripping it. Nikki Glazer's over. He's coming over. I'm going. Yeah, you're going to cough.

I'm going to cough. I'm going to cough. That's going to be, that's expected. I want to impress it. I want to hear to know. But cigarettes, what about when you're drunk, though? No. Never, and you never got a little bit like dizzy from it?

I never, oh, I've had that sort of nicotine sort of effect of lighting the fusey, even more for for drinking but it was only ever from you know lucies or like uh whatever other other nicotine products not cigarettes i couldn't cigarettes i never really got into and i did but it was the same feeling from cigarettes as vaping yeah but the when you when you smoke a cigarette you even if you're even if you brush your teeth you wake up the next day and you're like i smoked a cigarette last night and I can still taste it. Yeah, your skin on your your philtrum smells.

But that's what, that's what cigars are like too. And weirdly, I am quite fond of cigars. Well, that's everyone else. I feel like. Well, the last couple times I brought a cigar in here, I couldn't get a fucking man to smoke one. I like smoke. I like smoking a cigar, like when I go fishing. They need to be on my terms.

Yeah. I don't like to be surprised by cigars. No one does. I don't like to be mouth-fucked, unconsensually. With a cigar. Especially, yeah. I mean, like, I like smoking a cigar while we're recording, but I don't, it's not my preferred way of recording.

Do you know why I was a little tardy today? Yeah, didn't you have an appointment or some shit? No, no, he did. I had an appointment. He was tardy for a different reason. I was tardy because my cleaning lady arrived and I was about to go out the door and she started admiring my coffee machine. Oh, yeah, well.

And I said, do you drink coffee? So the fellas can wait. Yes. and I said do you drink espresso drink she's probably from where the beans are yes she's from Poland I don't think they have good coffee

I don't think they have beans I think they just like have ancient grounds and ammunition tins from Soviet era potatoes they just they just make coffee out of like the ashes of dead relatives

you want sausage coffee so you made her a cup so I made her a coffee Did she like it? She couldn't. She said, and I know she's telling the truth because I don't think she can, I don't think from Poland you can. They're not allowed. They're not allowed.

They're too dumb. They never learned it. Yeah. They're too dumb. They never learned it. They were against, they would get shot. They'd firing squad. Of course.

If you lied. Yeah. And she said, this is the best coffee I've ever had. Really? Yeah. I believe it. She said, normally I just drink from Starbucks. But even then, it's not.

it's not good no it's not and then I said because I made her a proper latte yeah but I didn't tell her that I made it with

pistachio milk which was the only milk I had left I'm not even kidding you you can't even offer that to a Polish woman I'm experimenting with

I kept the label away from her yeah I told her it wasn't dairy milk but I was like it's oh it's oat milk it wasn't

it was pistachio and it's almost brown it looks like ceiling cold. Stachio milk is crazy. It's insane. Tough to steam. Tough to texture. My latte art was not good. Why pistachio milk? I'm just trying all different types of milk to find the one that I think is really good. It's what do you wouldn't give us your top three right now. Easy. I don't drink dairy milk, which is tough because whole milk is the easiest milk to texture. And the best. I wish I did. It's the best tasting with a latte, I think. Yeah. Yeah. But why are you anti-dairy milk?

I've just, I've been, when I was a child, I was quite lactose and talking. Oh, okay. What about like raw milk? What's that? Raw. Why are you saying it like the sun god, raw? Why are you saying it like the revolutionary force in Ireland? Yeah, up the raw milk.

You should start making your lattes with raw milk. Be hilarious. Raw? Raw. Raw. Raw. What am I not pronouncing it right? You're leaving the W out.

Raw. Yeah, that's what you said. Raw. like up the raw raw I'm on raw St. Brown I'm on raw same brown I'm on raw same brown

I'm on raw same brown I'm on raw same brown yeah you're saying raw the same as raw that's how it's pronounced raw raw raw raw you're bow no that's raw that's how you would say it this is raw

you'd say row that's how it is pronounced can you differentiate R a and RAW yeah you guys are saying RAA just say both of them You're like RAA say both of them It's actually RAC

say both of them next to each other. RA and RAW. Ra. Raw. You're saying like a long A. I feel bad for you guys. It's all right, though.

We can move on. We can move past it. Yeah, we should. You should try rad milk. Anyways. Razz was unpasteurized? Yeah. Cool.

I bet that's great. Can't be. Cannot be. It's disgusting. Oh, really? Doesn't taste good? Never had it. It's gross.

It's like drinking a Guinness off the tap. Yeah. It's thick. You can't do that. It's like paint. Did you try goat? No. Oat. Oat is what I really do rely on the most.

Not almond? Ammon? Ammon's impossible to texture. Because it's like water. So thin. Yeah. Yeah. It's so watery.

And you're on pistachio. Well, I bought that because they had a barista addition. And so anything that has a barista addition, I want to try. What is barista? It's milk specifically made for texturing. What do you mean? What kind of a question is that? It's in the title.

Barista. The barista edition. Yeah. Like somebody that makes coffee, a barista. When I was in middle school, we had like a fundraiser for diabetes, like a food drive or some shit, which is weird because I'm pretty sure they already found the cure for that. But the, it was just the diabetics putting on a food bar. I don't know what we were fundraising for. But the principal came over and did the announcement.

and he kept on calling it diabetus. Have you guys ever heard people say that? Yeah. It's just not... It's like a Pittsburgh way to say. Yeah. He's like, we're doing a fundraiser for diabetes. And everyone was like, what the fuck is diabetes?

I do remember. It's what happens when Jerome Bettis retired and lost a ton of weight. Yeah. Diet Bellas. Yeah. Damn. I got it. Well, you really got to get over for a cup of that coffee.

I do. Are there other nuts that have been... made into milk. Probably macadamia. Milk, and they call it milkadamia. That sounds so nice. I think that's going to be quite good. You should start getting into like, have you ever seen people make their own almond milk? No, that's a bridge too far. Not for you. You could probably make it a little thicker if you wanted to.

That's a bridge too far. Cashew milk is supposed to be good. Is it? Creamy, yeah? I think I heard there's only like six almonds in a half gallon of almond milk. There's like a shocking low amount. Maybe it's not exactly six. Mac, maybe we could check that. How many almonds are in an almond milk?

I thought it was the other way around. I thought it was like a billion almonds yield one cup of almond milk. I think it's the other way. I think it's like there's not that many almonds. Four almonds? In what container? What size container? In an eight ounce glass.

Oh, God. So it's just not almond milk. What else is in there? Yeah, there's got it. That's not even the main thing. It's white water. What else is in there? It's just water.

Water? Water, white coloring. Dry wall. So it's got to just be water and almonds. That's disgusting. You could definitely think in that if you just put... Yeah. It's just watered off.

Yeah, that's fucking disgusting. I'm never drinking that shit again. Well, what do you think the rest of it is? Fucking powdered milk. But I'm saying, what do you think that macadamian milk is? Macadamians and almonds. Macadamia. Yeah.

I think that you could probably make a nice thick one. Or like an almond ice cream? Almond heavy cream. Because that's probably what is. They're probably only using four almonds to save money because almonds obviously, they're insanely expensive right now with AI and everything. But so if they, you could probably make your own and use like 700 almonds, then you get some thick almond milk.

Yeah, that's good. Just a paste. A nice paste. It looked like cottage cheese. Yeah. It looks like a fucking sourdough starter. Well, you guys know what day it is. It's a gift day.

It's present Tuesday. Oh, wow. Yeah, we always do presents on Tuesdays. Fast. It's tradition on the podcast. We do present Tuesdays. Yes. And I actually have a two-part gift.

Great. And I'm going to give one part to you and one part to you. Awesome. But the gift doesn't work unless you two. It's like a horrocks. Share. We have to put your two things. Infinity stone.

So why don't you guys just, if you wouldn't mind, closing my eyes? Oh, sure. Yeah. Would that be right? No, put out your hands, Harry. No, I'm going to need you to put out your hands and close your eyes. How am I supposed to close them without my hands?

He's right. This is a fallacy. You can't close your eyes and hold out your hands. All right, here you go. Ready? I don't like having my eyes closed. That's for you. And that's for you. Can I, or I already open your eyes. Oh, hell yeah.

Whoa. Yeah. So this is a. What? Kevin Stevens bobblehead that did not make it here in one piece. So I don't know. Which Stevens is this? Is this my Stevens?

Yeah, it's your Stevens. You see my Stevens knocked his head off. That's crazy. Look at the schnaz on this Stevens. Let me see. I feel really bad. This guy had one of these and he sent it to me. It broke in transit.

It wasn't your fault, right? No. I opened the box and it was like. Who sent it to you? Kevin Stevens. No, no. Dude, for what it's worth, when I was in Pittsburgh, I went to six different stores looking for Kevin Stevens jersey for you. Yeah. Nobody had one. Got to get that off fanatics. They're like, crumpled up piece of fucking. All we got is, uh, Lemieux, Crosby. I can't

do it. Yager. Yager and, uh, if Jenny Malkin. Yeah. Malkin. This is, uh, Mark and, uh, Malkin. This is Archandre Flurry. Yeah, that's so nice. That's such a good gift. I had some fucking... This is almost like a war crime of some sort. Well, put it... I don't know what to do it.

Maybe we can... Super glue it. Maybe we can glue it. You know who I'll know what to do with this? Frank the tank. He's probably... He's probably got a repair guy. He's probably bit the top off.

He probably has access to the guy from Toy Story 2 that fixes Woody. I don't really... I'm sad about it. I was excited for you to have this. Those are hard to find, I would think. Let's put it on the table. Yeah, put it on the table. I'm trying to balance it properly.

You should be able to. If you have any feng shui, you should be able to balance that. If you've ever done Tai Chi, you should be able to balance that. What a great gift. It was a great gift, but... Still, it is. It's better this way. We wouldn't be able to...

Oh, well done, Harry. It should be a pretty easy fix. I mean, it already is fixed. Yeah, we'll never do anything more than that. So now if we have guests and they knock it over, we'll blame them. We'll make them feel bad. Oh, that's a tough one to find.

Good luck. Well, if you want to replace the Kevin Stevens bobblehead, be our guest. It's one of one bobblehead. Did you guys see that... It's hilarious. The guys from spitting chicklets were taking some shots back at you, Sass. I did not know. They basically have you on pigeon status.

What are they saying? We were on son of a boy dad. Great guys. Sass turns out three. to be the biggest scumbag of anyone. Because he said he loved you. He said he said he was a big whitney guy. Yeah, but I love SAS too.

But in the sense of the argument or the discussion, SAS said he will never let anyone cut him. So if you're somebody like me that's like, I'm going to miss my flight. Now granted, I ended up in the Delta Lounge. That was the tough part of the story. He's like, no. All I could think of was him telling your dad wit that he can't go by

in what would ensue. after the fact would be life-altering for SaaS. Dan Whitney, 25 years ago, he's probably, like, headlocking the kid in the middle of the airport. And, like, they're rolling around,

like, wrestling, pinkies up. But nowadays, my dad would say, hey, you know what? I understand. And I get it.

And with old age comes peace of mind and maybe realizing that this little gamer slash comedian slash, how else would you describe? Shitster. Yeah. Did you say comedian?

Yeah. Non-first. class flyer. That you're a pigeon. That's crazy. That you're a shitter and that you were the main one going at Whitney and that he loves us. Well, I wasn't going at Whitney.

You wanted his head on a player. That wasn't a personal attack. I was just disagreeing with what he did at the airport. You said he was a scumbag. But I also said before multiple times, I was like, and you know, I have nothing but respect for Whitney. Which makes when you were like, that's crazy because I respect him. But.

Exactly. Which almost makes it seem to me, it's working. It's what like when people will always be like, hey, I like the guy. I'm a fan of his before they absolutely sewer him. That happens on a lot of podcasts here. I consider him to be a good person. Yes, I consider him a good friend. When people say that. So for him to have done that is so out of character. I would consider, I would consider Whitney to be a friend for sure. And then he said that if this had happened 20 years ago, his dad would have put you in a headlock in the line. Really? His dad would have put you in a headlock 20 years ago. Why would he be putting me in a headlock? Because if you, if you, if you, if you, you'd have put you in a headlock in the line. Because if you, if you, if you, if you'd have put you, you said no, you can't pass. And he would have put you in a headlock. Yeah, and then we would have gone to court and I would have sued him and won. Can't put someone in a headlock for following rules. 20 years ago, 20 years ago, you could.

That's what happened in this fucking country. That was post 9-11, 20 years ago. I know. That's what I'm saying. Right after 9-11. He could be like, he's a terrorist. He's wearing a turban. I will say, well,

while we're on the topic of terrorism, um, the, with the, the, the, the, the war obviously going on.

Yes, of course, obviously. I don't, like, I'm not like a paranoid person typically, but like, I'm on the subway

these last couple days. My eyes are bouncing. I'm looking at everybody. Like, giving them a full ocular, like, does he have an explosive attached to his chest right now? Since when do you go on the subway?

I take it here and back every day. The one train? Yeah. to what stop? Don't worry about it. Christopher Street. No. You go to Houston?

Don't worry about where I'm going. You're going to Christopher. Don't worry about where I'm going. Obviously, we know you're going to Christopher. I don't need the sleeper cells finding my info. Christopher is a lot closer to you than Houston. Oh, I like to walk. You also take an Uber every time I ever walk out of the office with you.

Maybe I'm going somewhere else. Oh, in the same direction. A bounce. Yeah, you always do. I do take the train. Have you detected any bogeys out there? Any potential? A couple false flags.

I started watching neighbors. Oh, yeah. You guys were right. It's hilarious. It's phenomenal. So funny. The way that such different groups of people in such different parts of the country throw the word liberal around.

Oh, yeah. As the worst insult that you can call someone, he's a liberal. Yeah. He's fucking pussy liberal. Yeah. That's liberal behavior It's so nice It's nothing to do

And then how the people Always wind up having like very similar interests That's just like they would be best of friends Well there's a lot of them in that arc They were good friends Yeah Have you have did you watch every episode of just the first Just one

Oh there's only three What? Yeah Will there be more? Yeah it's it just came out It's coming out now Like it's just starting Oh good what fun

But the I think the third episode is my favorite so far. I was scrowing. Screaming laughing. I thought that there was a fire alarm going off in Manhattan. Yeah. It was fucking sass. So that was laughing so goddamn hard.

I thought a damn banschie was out. Have you guys ever had any type of beef with your neighbors? I know you said your neighbor always, what, she'd fall asleep on her door or something? Yeah, shit like that. Oh, that was a great. That was one of my favorite moments you ever shared. Well, it's happened like five times.

Can you just give us a quick recap? one of my neighbors will occasionally just like pass out right in front of my door and then I gotta go like wake up I gotta go like knock on the super's door and be like I think my neighbor's dead it's happened like multiple times that's so funny and they're standing or they're laying they'll have a nice lay but it hasn't happened in a while thankfully and I get like every time I hear something by the door I'm like fuck You just hear a slide and then a thump. Because last time it happened, it was like 7 p.m. How is it possible that she gets all the way to her door? That's what Nate was asking. And says, I can't go another step. I'm too tired.

I think it's like the keys maybe. You go for the keys. That's like a fucking Manchurian candidate trigger? No, I've never once gotten to the door and then not gotten in. I think it's the same reason that a lot of people will only, shit themselves as they go through their own front door because your body starts to relax when you know that you're close to home and so it's just like yeah maybe in her maybe like like for me the end goal is obviously getting into my apartment but maybe for her it's just getting into the

building safety yeah getting to safety the stairs are hard the door is easy she's done the difficult part yeah that's got you never hear her coming up the stairs either you'd think you would hear like shit falling over. She slithers up those bitches. Yeah. She's navigated the Congo ice fall. She's made it past Camp 3. Yeah.

She's made it up the Hillary step. Yeah. And she's 20 feet from the fucking summit. She says, I don't want to see the summit. I don't want to make the top of the world. I mean, it's happened. It's happened during the day. It's happened on Sundays. It's happened at 3 in the morning. The 3 in the

morning one was the worst one. why? Because I didn't have anything. It was just like, it was like, it was just chaos. Why didn't you just let her sleep there? I did. So why was that bad for you?

It's kind of hard to go to bed knowing that there's someone asleep directly outside your door. And you're like, hopefully they're alive. I'm not really quite sure. Yeah, because you might have to wake up in an hour and a half when paramedics come. Yeah, exactly.

With a black body back. The fire department prize opened my door. Dude, this girl, I think this girl has a disease. I don't know. Yeah, it's called addiction. She's got narcolepsy. Yeah.

She has to be an opiate addict. No, I don't think because there's never any weird behavior for like months at a time. And then it's just one, boom. Maybe she gave it up. One time, I used to live in just like a four-story walk-up. Oh, Mott Street? No, in Brooklyn Heights. Oh.

And I was on the second floor. but each floor was its own apartment. Yeah. So one night, this guy who lived the floor above me came home and was super, super drunk. Yeah. And it was like one in the morning on a Wednesday or some shit. And he starts ringing my doorbell buzzer. Yeah.

Because it's 1.30 in the morning. I'm dead asleep. Did he think it was his apartment? No. He just like left his keys and needed me to let him in. and I went down and let him in. What did I do? I mean, yeah, because I didn't have a buzzer.

I didn't have the ability to unlock the door. So I got up out of bed. That sucks. Put clothes on, went down, let him in. And I was like, what's going on, man? He's like, yeah, I left my keys. I don't know. And he never apologized.

And then I didn't remember. He was so drunk that he didn't remember it happened. Yeah. So it's like one of those things where I was like, do I bring this up to this guy and be like, by the way, you really put me out the other night. Like, please don't do that again.

Hit him with that passive aggression. Hey, Mark, you had a fun night the other night? They can feel bad about it. Yeah. Give him that old Catholic guilt. Yeah. If I did that to a neighbor,

if I woke a neighbor up at 1.30 in the morning because I didn't have my keys and I was super drunk, I would buy them a $400 bottle of wine. Yeah. I would just move out like that week. Yeah. I've got to get out of here.

Yeah. You've disgraced yourself in front of you. of your community. Like, people would be shunned in the Aztec time for things like that. Yeah. We're like killed publicly maybe. That's so, that's, I guess not bad. Have you,

you don't seem like the type of guy that would ever have any type of nasty behavior that would have the, your neighbor's mad at you other than playing Huey Lewis in the news too loud while you chainsaw girls to death. But outside of that, it'd just be. I've said this before, but I love it when people just like, constantly say that I must be a serial killer because I'm shaven.

Yeah. It's like, oh, you don't think that that guy right there who, you know, is unkempt, doesn't smell good, has horrible hygiene. Yeah. And has photos that like pictures on the wall of pretty woman that have like fucking crosses through the eyes and darts sticking out of their breasts. You don't think that guy's the one killing people? Who knows?

I'm having dinner with them. I'm getting to know these women. It could be a thing where it's like, you know, maybe those people that are so out there, it's like, well, they can't be them. Yeah. It would be too obvious. Too obvious? Yeah. But everybody puts it on any...

I feel like it usually ends up being them. The comments of any one of Francis's videos have that undertone that people will try to put serial killer on you. Yeah. I have too much at stake to start killing people. Yeah. Maybe like 10 years ago, but not now. Yeah. You're not going to kill now.

They're probably saying that. Best club in the country. I think I'm going to kill a woman before selling out the comedy works downtown. Yeah. Maybe after down. I think they're saying that you're going to celebrate a little bit. We'll see how this year's internet invitational goes. You know, if I'm losing early, yeah, maybe, maybe.

We'll kill some women. Women. I think that people are saying that you're calculated and your attention to details high enough that they could see you being able to execute. something. No, exactly. I think I think the key distinction is that I could get away with it. Right. Exactly. Yes. That's what they're saying. That it's like, oh, you

thought of every little detail of something and I think that that's what they're referring to. I take that as a compliment. It's a compliment. They're on your dick. Anyone is saying your serial killer is clear. People who kill women, the proclivity towards that is not well groomed, being groomed, well-groomed and having a skin Care routine and all of that. Girls actually, you're talking about a fantasy that they have as being serial killed by a well-groomed man.

You know that they want to have a combination of American Psycho, but also 50 Shades of Gray, where they also, they get killed by a super hot guy. That's why they listen to true crime so much. They're just trying to get themselves in the mood for death. They're trying to get off. Yeah. That's what they're doing. Everyone loved to like play up how handsome Ted Bundy was. Not even handsome.

I'll tell you what. That didn't look so good. No. What are actually hot serial killers? John Wayne Gacy was gross, right? Fat as shit. Yeah, fat gross. Usually, I think it's like men that can't get women, right?

Isn't... Yeah, I think the Ted Bundy stuff just gave people like the idea that it's not that. But yeah, like if you look historically at most serial killers, they're like oafs. Yeah, they're just... Yeah. This is going to get you serial killed. There's a serial killer listening right now who just... squeezed his eight-ounce glass of Welch's grape juice until it burst in his hand, just furious at you.

I don't have to kill women because I get along with them. Does that make sense? Like the math adds up for me. I've had, you know, look, I get it. Like, if I didn't get along with women, yeah, I could understand needing to kill them. It really just goes back to like your relationship with your mother. Like, if you have a good relationship with your mom, usually you don't kill people. but if you have a bad relationship with your mom this dude watched one Hitchcock movie and how that's literally like this the Edipus complex

He watched uh he watched that Monster's show The Ed Gein's story Literally did you watch that one I watched the Ed Geen all the way no I was thinking of What's the fucking show that got canceled After two seasons

True The one about it's about the serial killers And like the study of serial killers Mind hunters? Yeah, Mind Hunter. I didn't see it. Oh, phenomenal. It was, I tried it.

It was pretty dark and, I don't know. The first two episodes, weirdly, the acting is like awful, but it gets better. It's Jonathan Groff, right? Yeah, I think. He's a big Broadway guy. Yeah. Speaking of, Luigi Mangione's show just went on Broadway today. If we're talking about Killers and Broadway, really?

There's like a show about Luigi Mangioni already out on Broadway. No way. I feel quick. A farce? I'm not sure. A comedic farce? Mac, could you see if it's a comedic farce about Luigi Mungioni? Well, you know it was probably the CIA that wrote it.

They've probably been writing it. Oh, they're in on killing the CEOs of pharmaceutical companies. The CIA is? Yep. It's a comedy? It's a com. My cardiologist, I can't see him anymore. I'm supposed to have an award.

You're out of network? Mount Sinai Medical Group. is no longer fucking the uh but our insurance anthem blue cross with shield doesn't work with them if don't fuck with them so my primary care physician and my cardiologist are now no longer available to me and these are people from whom i need uh continuing care yeah that's insane so can they like recommend you to someone else that is in network i mean i'll just have to go find someone myself but like i'm i'm on a prescription medication for years from this guy.

And then they're going to probably try to prescribe you some kind of like, oh, it's exactly the same ass medicine. You're going to go watch Luigi and everybody else is going to be laughing and you're going to be gripping your eight-ounce glass of Welch's grape juice like this, fucking so pissed off. You're probably going to leave fucking with a bloodlust. You're not wrong. You're going to leave so pissed off ready to kill.

Should we go see Luigi's, Luigi's play? Mack, who's the CEO of our health insurance company? of what, Blue Anthem Blue Shield? Who's the CEO and what's their address? Yeah. What's their cross street? Not a bad idea. I wouldn't mind seeing in Luigi or get the actor to whoever plays him.

What do you think's playing him? Probably Christian Chenoweth. Timothy Shalemi. Who's that actor that's Ben, Ben Platt? Oh, yeah, I saw him in, uh... What was his goofy ass? Waving through a window. I don't know if I know Ben Platt.

I think you would You would He was in Some Some shit About the acapella groups That everyone loved Pitch perfect

Pitch perfect Using that He's like the second main character Not Adam He's not the hot main character He's like the Nerdier guy I guess And then he's in some

Musical where a guy Falls out of a tree And breaks his arm Because he was trying to kill himself I watched that on a plane Not knowing it was a musical But by the time they started Singing songs

I was pot committed So I just had the fucking Tough, tough musical movies are so bad. A tough watch, dude. When La La Land won an Oscar, I just realized that everybody in Hollywood is the dumbest person alive. Every time they come out with one. What about a tic-tick-boom? 39-day, 39-d-I.

I made it 10 minutes into that movie. I loved that movie. I've seen it twice. I've never even seen it, but I just heard him sing 39-D. Is it 39 or 49? I forget what they say. It's the story of how rent was made, right? Yeah.

Yeah, I can't be bothered. It's good. It's a good movie. I mean, lay mis, things like that. No, this is more. They always win the Oscars and I'm like, what the fuck are we doing here? This is a fun one. Swinney time.

It's fun. It's Andrew Garfield. Yeah, I know. Who doesn't like Andrew Garfield? Everybody likes Andrew Garfield. Exactly. So watch the movie. It's a great movie.

I tried. I was like, oh, it's going to be this the whole time. It's not the whole time. It's some good dialogue. And then there's some good dialogue. songs in it. La La Land was not quite musical.

There was five songs, there were five times to that movie where they broke out in song. I know. City of Stars. I also thought the music was great. It was not. You didn't like it?

I love that movie. It certainly was not. Why didn't you like it? The fact that they're breaking out in song and everybody's like, this is amazing. Like they're in traffic, like on the top of the thing. Yeah. another day of summer

opening number it's an ensemble it's an ensemble number it's insane you need to start with a bang a show like that they bastardized Ryan Gosling's career with that one

yeah Gosling was Gosling just on Jeopardy anyone yes with a guess yeah is that real I think yeah

he said IDK and it was like what's the surgery for ACL actually is it okay that could have been AI getting us that could have been AI

I've seen a lot of AI accounts recently where it's like guys being like the divorce effect. It's just an AI of just like a saggy-faced old guy filming himself at the gym and then they snap and it's the hottest guy you've ever seen with a 12-pack like two weeks afterwards supposedly and everybody's like congrats man.

It's so fun. You really turn shit around and keep going but you're like brother. Yeah. I saw one where there was a flood in India and an elephant with its trunk plucked a drowning tiger out of the river and put it on its back. And then the tiger

lies down on its back. And all the comments were like, oh, nature can be amazing. And then the fifth one was like, who's going to tell them? Yeah. It's pretty crazy when you read the comments of those in it every, there's like most of the people are like, wow.

Yeah. That's fun. That's really good. The gorilla getting dragged into the forest and like they hand their baby gorilla to people on a safari and everyone's like wow that gorilla's so fucking smart to have done that the dying wish of a mother

transcends species my favorite ones are the ones where it's like it's like Obama and like Charlie Kirk and Epstein and Trump and Yanjahoo have ever seen those they'll do full like Charlie under arrest

yeah Charlie Kirk came a little kid and it's Obama with like a SWAT SWAT uniform on I liked when LeBron, the one where they would do the LeBron press conferences. I haven't seen it in a long time. That was back when it was fun. Yeah. That was back when people were having fun with it.

Yeah, they were having fun. They're intentionally being duplicitous. Now it's for the use for evil, strictly. Strictly. Well, I mean, your boy, Altman, did you see Altman sold it all to the government? He was like, they promised they won't use it to hurt people. Yeah, that guy's a fucking bomb. I wish nothing but the worst for him.

Honestly, Matt, can you look up Sam Altman's cross streets? Yeah, we might need to go. watch Louisiana find out what healthcare he uses I'm sorry that I spoke over you I don't know I just did just now

I don't think you did I don't think you did I was just a riff I think we're building we're building a bit of a lasagna where like the pieces have to be on top of each other yeah you're just just

like when I edit my voiceover stuff you wanted to come oh yeah we call it a J cut or an L cut what did they do? Yes or like when you're shuffling

some cards the whole card isn't over each other but just enough to make a nice tight deck. So you're good brother. The, uh, yeah,

Altman, guy's a problem. Yeah. It's a bad, bad guy. He's, he's a guy that you look at and you're like, that's a bad, like he's evil. Like, you know he will do anything it takes. He doesn't give a fuck. Matt, can you still see me? Maybe Sean, can you still see me?

Yeah, yeah, you go. Are you tucking away? I want to see more of room. Oh, I got you, I got you. I got you. I spent so much time looking at you because it's easy. It's hard for. me to look at him. I'm always bouncing around. I think that we need to yeah, we're going to orient the pod more towards me.

Yeah, I think that that would be nice. Or yeah, it's going to be nice. Or maybe we're both on a couch and you're on this couch. What about that? I wonder what that would do for our dynamic. And I'm still in the middle, but we're just looking at you. You know, who wouldn't like it? Why? Only child over here. Single child. I don't hear it. I could just start laying down on this one

facing that way. What do you mean? Just tilt the mic this way. Will you want to lay down? Sure. If we're going to change up the whole I've I've I bored as long as I could It's lie down Oh I see

I can't I can't countenance that anymore Well I can't So lay down is Brista I'm gonna say Barista Talking about lie or lay

You want to hear that barista Barista That's how you want to hear Have him say it Yeah It's funny I actually said it as baristic Because I wanted to sound less cunty.

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Take a quick quiz, a style quiz. And be sure to select boy dad when prompted to unlock your 80% off. That's fabletics.com slash boydad. I bought a laptop yesterday. You did? Yeah, I did. I got fleeced. they they they they fucked me

you buy cash no I walked to Best Buy right after we finished recording way colder out than I thought it was going to be I was freezing and then I got in there and I was like well now I'm definitely behind a laptop a little treat now I'm cold now I need a now I need a toy I wish I couldn't relate to that

oh my God yeah it was not a good idea it was one of those ones that as soon as I bought it I was like this was stupid and I didn't need to do that. Is it built like a tank? It's a beast. Really? Yeah. And I got a cooling pad. I need that.

From below it. It gets so hot. It gets hot. From being on your lap? No. Because it's it's a regular laptop but it has the capability to not be a regular laptop. So it's like... Would it be a fucking plane? Is it a transformer? Are you talking about a transformer that you bought

yesterday? No, like you could use it like it's like a standard, like a PC. Like a you have a gaming PC, you can still use the gaming PC just to do normal tasks, like, just like go on Google Chrome or open up Excel. So it's like if you're doing like regular shit like that, it's not going to get too hot. But if you play games on it, it's going to get very hot. If you watch porn on a gaming PC, do the women come out of the screen and jerk you off? Yes.

It's like the ring, but erotic. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, the NUVA ring. Like this thing, it's 240 hertz refresh rate. So you're going to be seeing stuff in porn that you've never seen before. Yeah. You haven't had the technology to see it. You see the cuts.

Exactly. And like are switch position now, please? Yes. You're going to be seeing those. You're going to be getting those extra frames that you'll realize just how fake it is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Is it going to be elevated to keep it cooler? Like if you put it on a little like elevation and it's not flush on a surface. That's what the cooler. The cooler goes under. Got it. It's just two fans. A little igloo cooler. So basically you're doing for your laptop what I did for my bed.

what did you do for your bed? I got the eight sleep. Oh, you got that temperature regulation. Is that the thing that goes under the sheet? Or is that like the whole mattress? It's under the sheet, but it's a new, it's a new mattress. It's a new mattress top. Yeah.

It's like a fan that goes in. No, it's water. It's a water. It's a mattress topper that has water running through it. And then there's a machine connected to it that regulates the temperature of the water. and regulates the temperature of the bed beneath you. How much water are we talking? How thick is it with water?

Like that? What? Does it feel like you're in a water bed? No, not at all. Does it like cycle out the water? Or do you have to have like running water attached to it? You cycle, it cycles out the water through the, through the reservoir thing. So there's like a tank.

There's like a tank next to the bed. But I can't even see it. Yeah. Is a machine, a hub. they call it, I think, which has a hose into the mattress. And throughout the night as my body temperature changes, sometimes I get hotter, your body It changes with it. It adjusts the temperature of the bed to make sure that you are having optimal temperature.

That's great. Honestly, I don't even like kind of fuck eight sleep is my attitude because I asked them if they'd send me one and I would promote the hell out of it. And they were like, we only work with athletes. and I was like, I'm in the best shape of my life. And they were like, we send them the internet invitation? Dude,

should have said, I am an athlete. I know. They were like, we've stopped working with influencers and work. I was like, don't you fucking call me. Hold the fucking phone there.

Yeah. Not an influencer? Don't call me an influencer. I'm an entertainer. Athlete, comedian, entertainer, musician. I am an entertainer.

Yeah. Don't you dare call me an influencer. But they were like, anyway, so anyway, pissed me off. But, so I don't want to give them free ads.

So you bought it. I bought it. bought it. How much was it? Maybe 3,000 bucks? I thought you were to say $300. No. There's got to be a $300 version. No.

Yeah, there's cheaper companies. Yeah, you get a water bag. Just get a trash bag, fill it with water. Splashing around in bed. Sleep in the tub. Frozen trash bag, a slab of ice. Wake up freezing, turn the tap back on. It regulates me. I used to put water on my pillowcase.

Okay, that's fucking insane. Not really, no. Yes, it is. No. You're going to, you're going to trust me on this one. It's not like you're going to bed soaking wet. You're putting your, making your pillow wet every night? I said I used to when I was young.

How old? Child. How old? Probably like eight. Why'd you stop? I don't know. Because you realize it's crazy. You grew up.

Yeah. It actually isn't that crazy, though. Pouring water on your pillowcase every night. We didn't never. we never have had like my parents still don't have AC they just live in like a thousand degrees constantly it's insane like I would go to bed every night like oh my god I can't breathe it's so fucking hot what about like a ceiling fan or something no never had one that can't be true you're just do you're I swear to God I've never had a ceiling fan in my own in my entire life I've never had a ceiling fan in my room

what about a box fan yeah occasionally a box fan but Those don't do anything that just blows around hot air. No, if I have a box fan. On your face. Yeah, blowing hard at me. Even if it's warm, I can sleep pretty well with that. That's how I sleep now. Now I sleep.

I got the ace. I still have the AC just humming. Even in the winter. Good for your brain. You have to. The radiator, if you choose to live the life where you're letting the radiator decide when you're going to be hot and cold, it's a bad life to live. Right.

You're submitting. So I. And I have a fan next to my bed. I hate to do this. I really, this bothers me to say this. All good. The eight sleep is the single best thing I've purchased. Ever.

Probably even better than my coffee machine machine. My only worry with the AIDS sleep. Oh my God. Did you just break that? What the hell? You're savage. You got to buy us a new one now. Oh.

My. So much easier this time. My only worry with the AIDS. with AIDS or the AIDS sleep. Eight, eight, eight, I thought it was AIDS sleep. My only problem with the eight sleep is that,

it's for people sleeping better when they have AIDS. Eternal AIDS sleep. I'm just worried that it would be like, I worry that I would get into a thing where I wouldn't be able to sleep without it. That is a fear. Fortunately, I travel so much that I can't adjust to it.

And it makes me look forward to getting home and sleeping in my bed so fucking much. Yeah. You have one upstate too? Mm-mm. Just in the city. No. I don't have one upstate because I rent my place upstate and I don't think that the people renting it deserve to have. No.

And also I worry they'd fuck it up. They'd pop it. But I also get, I'm giving them so much fucking credit here. I get sleep scores. Let's clarify their pieces of shit. they just make a damn good product. Why do you think they're pieces of shit? They wouldn't give you the free one.

Oh, they are. Yeah, yeah, right. We're scumbag assholes. Yeah, don't buy their product, but it's amazing. They give you sleep metrics and it tracks all this. So like it tells you the quality of your sleep, fucking how much time you had in REM, sleep interruptions. Hit us with some stats, brother. Don't be stingy. Well, I haven't slept.

What's your average REM looking like? I don't know I mean on a this was last week I got a 90A that's the best I've ever had and I slept I mean it was a crazy night of sleep

eight hours and 27 minutes what time did I go to bed that means you got about nine and a half too if you factor in how much time you were awake yeah that's what he's awake for an hour

it knows when you fall asleep it's like Santa Claus yeah and then it it It takes away the time that you weren't asleep during your sleep. No. That's what mine does. I don't think so. Well, either way.

I would go to bed and I'd be like, oh, I got nine hours of sleep and then I would check and it'd be like, actually, you got eight. I really didn't have much sleep interruptions. But I had one hour and 16 minutes of deep sleep, one hour, 51 minutes of REM. And I mean, that's the best night of sleep I've had in a long, long time. What time did you go to bed? That night? Yeah.

1122. Wow. You slept until 8 on the dot? Yeah. Until right before 8. This week has been bad because I'm so stressed. And you can just tell. I mean, so last night I slept six hours and 45 minutes.

Quality was 84%. It's not terrible. Sleep score was 82. Not terrible. I slept from 1138. Oh, excuse me. No, that's not right. Slept from 1207 a.m. to 709 a.m.

Not terrible. That's pretty much what I did last night. One thing that's cool is, no, that must have been two nights ago because I had that. That can be right. I was writing all night last night. That sounds like it. Yeah, this was two nights ago. Sounds like your sound asleep.

Maybe you're sleep writing. You never do that? No, I can't do that. So anyway, the point is, though, one thing that's really cool is that like to when it wake, if you want, you can set an alarm through it. Yeah. And it just gently vibrates under. you to wake you up.

Oh, that's nice. That's so nice. And then it'll slowly raise the temperature as well to like. Do you know what? You know what kind of numbers? The video of you explaining all this would do just like that cut up video. I'm angry that I got sucked in, but it's such a good product that I can't, I can't even resist. Now, I would like that.

I wake up hot as shit all the time. You'd benefit from this. Yeah. Because it can be so hot around you and you can just, you can go. all the way down to the minus 10 setting and you'll be cold. You'll put a hot, heavy duvet over yourself and you'll be

comfortable. That's nice. Minus 10. That sounds so nice. That sounds really nice. So what is your internal temperature when that's happening? You obviously sleep hot though. I could probably use my gaming laptop on the bed to cool it down. You can put your, yeah, you don't need the cooling pad. In fact, you probably

take that right back to Best Buy. Oh, return it immediately. Yeah. How much was thing was a piece of shit. The cooling pad, it was like 30 bucks. Yeah, so now the mattress is only going to cost $2,970. Yeah. Let's see what the cost of the... I mean, gaming laptop was up there. I know.

You could have had a gaming laptop of the best night's sleep in your life. Aid sleep. Could have that AIDS sleep, that deep aid sleep that killed Freddie Mercury. That's sweet AIDS. Sweet AIDS sleep. Well, at least you bought this thing now. And now you're going to be able to game so fucking hard. at least you'll probably get good at video games now instead of sucking.

The guy tried to get, he made, he, the guy at the store explained this price match thing to me where he was like, the price will go, he's like, the price is going to go down in the next three months. And he's like, when it goes down, you, if you notify or like, you scan some shit on the app, on the Best Buy app, then they'll return the price difference. But I don't think the, like, I, and I was like, oh, I was like, I'm okay. And he was like, you're going to, he was like, you would save like 500. bucks if you do it. And I was like, all right, and I'll do it. But then I was thinking about it, I'm like,

well, what makes them think the, what makes them think the price is going to go down? Isn't everything trending up? Not in technology. Yo, specifically in tech. No, that laptop will be replaced by a newer version next. Yeah, but the parts, like the storage is what's expensive. That's what's causing everything to go up. You got suckered.

I think I got fucked. You got badly suckered. Anytime that they want to buy a... Now I'm just like, I'm a Best Buy member. Oh, you're. You are? Yeah. You can't be buying that when they're like, you want to insurance on this calculator?

You want the warranty on this TI 89? That's what I. That's what I. You don't want the fucking warranty on the same. No, typically I say no, but this was so expensive that I was like, yeah. Did you get shamed by a black nerd? No, Indian nerd. Oh, even worse.

But we didn't, he didn't shame me. We both were. It was more of a collaboration. It was more like game respects game. Because once I dropped on him, I was like my current rig at home when I'm working. He was like, oh, this guy's serious. He means business. Yeah.

That commission must have been nice for him. I think they got commissions. He got paid yesterday, that's for sure. And I did the survey. It's kind of guy I am. Five across the board. Oh, yeah. That's love.

Francis caught me in the hallway talking, talking, talking, talk a little Spanish. Yeah, Rome was talking a spy doll. To the cleaning ladies. He always is doing. We call that in, we call that, uh, what's the, the word for that. Code switching. It's close. What's the word I'm trying to think of?

Oh, performative. We call that performative. Yeah. I mean, I was doing it alone. Were you, though? Yeah. Because it sounds like you were just, you just caught Francis walking by at the perfect time. Francis caught me. I didn't know Francis was curling around that corner. You were waiting for someone. I wasn't waiting.

You were waiting for someone to go by and there. Was that Roan's talking fluent Spanish with the cleaning lady? how impressive is that he wasn't though he was asking her how to say something yeah I was asking how to say something dumb ass he said he said comeo say di say ice on

hispano how how come he say they're here right now yeah how much said he say run I was asking how you say brown because I said one of my sons has brown eyes like me and the other one has blue eyes

like Jesus in the Bible. What did they say? She said, I'ma gus Jesus. Me Gusta Jesus. What's the, no, how do you say brown? Marron. Maron.

Marron. And then what's blue? Agua. Adul. Athul. If you're in, if you're in Barcelona. You guys both have brown eyes? Yeah, I have brown eyes.

Yeah, you got beautiful blue eyes. You got really blue eyes. Lovely blue eyes. They say that blue eyes with red hair is the single rarest combination of hair and I color together in the world. I'll believe it. Someone just told me that. Yeah, I believe it.

Yeah, that makes sense. Because there's probably even more women with like blue hair and brown eyes than brown eyes and yeah. I never would have thought, though, that I always thought that a lot of redheads had blue eyes. No. I don't think. A lot of them have brown eyes. I hate, I hate redheads. With brown eyes?

Just period. Full stop. Hate them. You're self-loathing ginger. Yeah. I do everything I can to hang out with non-redheaded people. What's a self-loathing ginger? It's like an uncle cracker?

You and Mook are going to be like quite the squad together. I can't be seen with him. You're going to be opening for you. I think if people see us walking together, they're going to think we're up to no good. They're going to think he's your son. They'll think we're plotting. Yeah, my boy's open. for me tonight.

Is that happening in comedy? Are they like famous Canadian sons the way that they're football players? Like, Chidor Sanders. Is there a comedy version of Chador? Fardsey's dad is a clown and he brings him to come do like magic. He does like magic and stuff. Oh, really?

I didn't know that. Yeah. I thought he just did stand up on the shows. Why does, yeah, well, I wonder why that is. If you have a,

if you're a funny comic dad to the kids wind up not being funny or they're just like, I want to be somebody that's present in my kid's life. That's a good question. I don't know. Athletes always want to be kids. I feel like if you're an athlete, the thing is like your kids are going to be athletic.

But if you're funny, your kids aren't going to be funny? Not necessarily. Really? You just get a serious batch? Good. Depends on how you raise them. I'm raising my slapstick. My dad, my dad, when I said this,

when my dad, when I became a comedian, my dad also started becoming a comedian. He was like, oh, he's successful. Clearly, this is a genetic thing that I ignored in myself. If he had fostered it. I gave this to him. Now, it's almost not too, it's not too late,

but it's close for me to uncover this long-lost skill of money. Yeah, yeah. My dad's honestly the same way. Yeah, he's turning it up. Yeah. I can see that. Big time.

What comedians are you? your dad's age? I don't know. What comedians are your dad's age? Seinfeld. Really? Jerry. Your dad could have been Jerry if he had just applied himself.

I feel like anyone could have been Jerry. You're saying there's no special sauce to be a Jerry. Had to be the right guy. Huh? Had to write the jokes. Like that time, like that time when Jerry got big, they were just begging for a Jerry. They needed a Jerry. You just, anyone could have been Jerry.

He just had to write the jokes that Jerry Seinfeld wrote. That's like being like. like anybody could have been fucking Wayne Gretzky. You just had to score the goals. Yeah. Pretty much. Yeah, but that like, Wayne did it.

And Seinfeld did it. But Seinfeld probably had like a unique. You just don't like Seinfeld? No, I love Seinfeld. He dated that 17 year old? Because she was legal. Because that was the age of consent in New York at the time was 17. No, I got nothing against him.

Okay. So what's the problem? If he wants to do that, I wouldn't do that personally. It's legal. That's not really my cup of tea, 17. But look, if that's the way that Seinfeld likes it. Because you just haven't hit your late 30s yet.

You don't have enough money. Once you hit your late 30s when you really start craving 17. You just don't have enough. You don't have enough money yet. Yeah, true. Once you have enough money, all of a sudden, 18-year-olds look tired. Yeah.

The senior class, I don't know. I want the junior class. Do you guys ever like just randomly while we're doing this look up and see that our producers and not one of them is laughing? What are you talking about? They've been laughing the whole. I'd just be like, oh my God,

I feel so bad that these guys have to fucking listen to this shit. Now, to be honest, I look up and I'm like, why is the hooping and holler and set so much nicer? Norse. Looks like they're about to film like the survival, the survivor fucking. finale.

What are the tiki torches doing over there? We're going to go over. We're going to get the votes going now. Jeff. Jeff's going to come flying out. Is there anyone on earth that you two would ask for an autograph at this point in your life? Autograph. Whose autograph you'd want? Nope. No, not really. I couldn't, I wouldn't ask for John Hancock's autograph if I saw him alive. The autograph. Yeah, I don't think so. I just hand him a pen. John. You know what to do. So no autographs. What about who would, with whom would you want a photo?

A lot of people. Yeah, a lot. Really? LeBron, Brady, Gibbs. What is that photo going to do for you? Are you going to look at it? Are you going to post it? Yeah, probably.

Both of those. Save it for when they die. Yeah. Then post it again. I wouldn't want. Say I was actually their best friend. Just a pose. This is about me, not them.

I don't have a Vanderbeek I wouldn't want just a contrived photo with Tom Brady I'd want one that like those girls do Candid? Where they're like looking at each other Yeah yeah that would be cool I want a candid photo with me and Tom Brady I want to get you could make that happen though

Without like begging like you could just be like Hey take a photo of me and Tom Brady And then go up and be like hey and I and then like while you're taking the hand Someone's sick that photographer just has to be dialed Yeah, like you could get a candid one like that. I want to go up to Tom and I'd be like, Tom, can you just pretend that you're laughing really hard? Or like, would you be willing to be laughing so hard that you're like leaning into my chest and I've put my head on the top of your head? Do you think that you could tickle?

Does tickling, does that work at any age? Like, could anybody? It becomes assault after a certain age. Yeah. But does it still make you giggle? No. But it's just like giggling without your consent? No.

I think you stop giggling. I think you start punching back. So there's nothing. There's no tickle. There's no tickle that could get you. If I tried to tickle Harry right now, he would fucking have a problem. Yeah. Not a problem.

You might be the last person on earth I would ever try to tickle. I'm not ticklish. Is there a thing where you can't like tickle somebody? You can only get tickled by someone you like. Like it can only work if you like the person. Like a stranger comes up and tries to tickle you. Like if there are a thing. interrogating a terrorist or something like that.

Like they couldn't tickle him and like start making him giggle, right? That'd be impossible because the terrorists. Yeah, I don't think. Yeah, no, I don't think that would work. I don't think it only makes babies giggle because they don't have it. Like, that's like their main. Like, has you, have you ever met? Like, have you ever, have you ever giggled from being tickled over the age of like six?

I mean, nobody's tickling me because you kind of know not to tickle people. Yeah, but you still have been, like I've probably been. tickled multiple times after the age of six. And I definitely wasn't like, woo-hoo-hoo. I was definitely like, yo, what the fuck? Stop. Who's tickling you?

I don't know. I mean, just like, you know, you used to, like, go up behind your boys and you give them the squeeze. That's a good one. That's a thing. Yeah. You've definitely done that. I'll hit one of you guys with it in the next couple days.

And you'll be like, Are you talking about right under the rib? Right under the ribs. And you give them the double squeeze. It's truly. That's like when someone does that to you, you want to fight them immediately. Yeah.

Because you're like, why did you just grab my fucking side fat? It is. When you take a little. I just don't think it's, the way you did the way Well that's like what That's like what people think happens

When you get tickled And it ain't You have to like almost check in on Even if you are tickling in that zero to six range You kind of have to tickle And check in on somebody To make sure that it's not turning into something You don't want it to

Well I think Francis was right I think it is It does turn into assault It's like a runaway train of tickling Like if you're getting tickled And you start laughing But you can't stop laughing didn't cook out an amazing good about this.

Is there anyone on earth that actually feels that they get tickled and they're laughing so hard they can't stop laughing? I have been in that situation that you start crying. You've been in that situation. You've been in that situation. Yes. Yes.

No more. No more. I've never been in that situation ever. I was like seven years oldish. Maybe six honestly. It was right at that. It was like my tickle. Yeah.

It was right when you stop when you lose your tickle. Yeah, exactly. Six. I lost my tickle. Yeah. When you do it to a big. maybe it feels like a superpower. When I'm tickling my boys,

I feel like I'm the funniest guy ever. I feel so fucking funny. That's cool. When you get your kids laugh, when you're getting runs, they have a great laugh. They all, both of them have great laughs. Finn especially.

Yeah, he's a fucking menace, but they both have, yeah, lovely choice. What's Finn short for? Finn again? Not a damn thing.

That's the whole fucking kitten caboodle right there. Bam. He's going to be got a lot of questions about that. I don't think so What's Finn short? What's that short for? Finneas. Finneas?

Finnegan. Finnegan's a cool name. I like that. It's just Finn. Finnegan's wake. People always ask me, they go, what's Harry? What is it? Harrison, Harold.

What the fuck would Harry be short for? Harrison. Harold. Okay. Those two specifically. Uh-huh. But they're not. It's not short for anything.

Yeah, same thing. Birds of a feather. I was telling Ron, I went to the, I went to do my passport today. like we spoke about. Did you? I couldn't. They would. I can't.

So I met it. I met this like I, my flight's in like a month, three weeks. I can't expedite it because it won't get here in time. And I can't do the emer, like the super expedited process because it's too far away. So they're telling me I have to wait until I'm 14 days away and then go. Wow. And that feels like it's a little bit of like, I know, we're kind of stressing and stressing this out for no. Like, what if I just go now and then you guys just.

It's landed to me in three weeks. Like that feels like that. You're in no man's land a little bit. You got to send them your flight to prove that that's when you're going. Such bullshit. Whole thing. You know where he's going? Birmingham.

You know, did you guys know Max going to Birmingham too? You're going Mac? For Dota. Dota, too. What's that? A game. What do you mean?

It's a competitive. That's why I'm going to Birmingham. It's for Call of Duty. Wait, you're going to film. No, I'm going for enjoyment. You're going to enjoyment. You're going to Burmmerham. Birmingham, England for enjoyment?

Yeah, he's going for Dota. He's a Dota fan. I was telling him the first rap battle I ever had was in, or first British rap battle I had was in Birmingham. And it's the worst city in all of the globe in the entire world. Yeah, it's going to suck. I think I played in a lacrosse tournament there once. Well, we've all been to Brum.

I don't think they even have grass there. Well, we play, I played for the... It's just like NFL Street. Yeah, you just have to play on the concrete. I played for the... Oxford men's team. And technically you had to be enrolled at the university to play in this because it was a college tournament. And they just lied and said that I was in the college.

But we went and we played, I remember we played a number of different universities. And a couple of them had, like each team would have one or two players that had played for national teams. Really? There was a guy who had played on the Welsh national team. He was pretty good. And that's that that's that game that Andrew Decker Featheroff had three. goals, right? Andrew D.C. D. F. ADF.

ADC. Guys, my birthday is coming up, which I know is the gayest thing I could possibly say. Isn't it in, aren't she going to be on the road? Yeah. How do you know that? That's how we've just topped the gayest thing. Because he said that. By you knowing

his birthday plans. Because he said that yesterday. Starting to feel like I'm the only one who really listens around. My straight ass couldn't fucking be bothered. I guess my question Because should I acknowledge my birthday at all? I think it's been like maybe five years since I even had anyone sing happy birthday to me. Yeah. Maybe even longer.

I don't need anyone to. But I think I'm getting to a point now where like I'm just dying. I think I think my so many birthdays in a row have gone by without any. acknowledgement or a blowing out of a candle or a cupcake or a present or a blowjob of any kind whatever you know it will blow you no one has there it's been so long since someone was appreciative that I was alive on my birthday that I actually think I'm dying birthdays are overrated you know we yourself some jeans that's what I tell myself every come on man you know that was a gift. He was fine. What the hell? Now the real Kevin Stevens is dead. Yeah, this is a

voodoo doll. He was also, his head keeps on falling off and getting Iqabod craned back on. You, uh, I think if you people started celebrating it too much out of nowhere, that would really feel like you're dying. You'd be like, whoa, what's this? Yeah. You need us, you need to just go to a restaurant where they sing to you. I don't want the, I don't even need the singing. I just, I'm, and by the way, I actually don't know if this is what I want. I am wondering in your opinions if this is something that I should do. Should I plan something?

Should I tell anyone, hey, my birthday's coming up. Yeah. Let's go. Let's go to Four Charles. You guys want to go to dinner. Can we take, can you take us to take you to dinner? Yeah, I could do that.

You make the Four Charles reservation. You use your connection. there because we don't have any, but we take you. Yeah, I'll go. Would you go? Absolutely. To Fort Charles? To Fort Charles? That'd be so nice. Like I'm declining a Fort Charles offer? I wonder. What about the men from your, uh, from your Harvard club? Couldn't those boys come together and sing you a little barbershop quartet or something like that? They all have kids. I've learned

people with kids are, they're too busy. They don't have the ability to like be as social. You know? It's a damn shame. Brown? I just neglect the kids. I let him fin for himself, if you know what I mean.

My friends, I don't see them anymore. And I know this is like everybody says this, but I almost feel bad asking them to do anything because I know that they're, to do so means that they're like asking permission from their wives and then leaving them at home to deal with shit. And their wives are definitely pissed.

Like people ask me to do anything. People ask me to do stuff and if I say no, they're mad at me. They're like, you don't have anything going on. That's annoying. That's piss me off. They respect that I have a lot of work, but they know that I don't have anything socially happening. That's so mean of them.

But I'm old enough that I don't really need social stuff to happen, which is again, what brings us back to my birthday. Should that be the one day of the year where I actually go do something planned? You could have like chat, GBT saying you happy birthday? I could do that. You're going to kill yourself on your birthday, but that's okay. I think that to me is... There's nothing wrong with that.

The perfect day, too. To end it. Too dramatic. Just from a... Oh, it's tight. Like the numbers are clean. He lived exactly 37 years. To the day.

Almost to the hour, actually. How old was he when he died? 37.0. He was still. 37.0. Yeah, I like that. I like that. Yeah, that's nice.

I wouldn't do that. I'm not advocating for that. Is that where, is, are you sure you want for Charles? Maybe we could find another place. I would go whatever. I don't,

I don't even know what we need to do. Let's go to Semma. Let's get something spicy Indian. I'm genuinely curious. How about Atomics? Men who don't, because a wife will be nice to you and, or whatever,

she'll honor you, the kids, that kind of thing. Yeah, yeah. You go out, oh, we're going out for your birthday. I'm treating you, whatever. I don't know. I'm just like, that day's, that day's going to happen.

And it'll be the next day and I'll be like, oh, fuck, my birthday was yesterday. That's what it's going to be. Like I'm an orphan. Yeah. Like I'm Harry Potter. I mean, that's pretty much how my birthdays are. It's like my mom texts, my parents will call me. And then that's really it.

Just go on with the day. What would make you feel most appreciated on your birthday? The problem for you is that you don't drink. When you were in your 20s, like your birthday was like a drinking occasion. Yeah. People would come together. It was an excuse to get fucked up.

Yeah. I guess on my 21st birthday, I went to Denver. Yeah. You don't need shake either. You don't need cupcakes. You don't eat any type of sweets. Yeah.

Maybe I'll buy a vape on my birthday. Maybe a birthday Swedish fish that we just plug a candle into the middle of. We just put a Yankee. you candle through a Swedish fish. That would be nice. What would make you feel appreciated on your birthday? I don't know.

I don't even think I want to feel appreciated. You want a gaming laptop? I want to feel like I actually was proactive about celebrating my own life. And I don't even need to do that with other people. Maybe it's that I, I don't know. The problem is I treat myself too often. Yeah, see, that's my thing too. You buy what you want when you

I buy it Yeah And then I'm like Well I don't deserve anything For my birthday Yeah Well someone should be doing that for you And it should be made

Harry No one's gonna get you The thing that you actually want Right which is a $3,000 mattress topper Exactly We're gaming laptop Or gaming laptop I can't go to my parents

And be like Buy me this multi-thousand dollar laptop Yeah They're gonna be like No Definitely not Rohn You made a joke

a couple times when I continued I was on my buying spree. You were like, that's the thing that's going to make you. And you know what's crazy? It worked? I actually think I bought all the things I need. Or want. I think I'd beat the game.

Yeah. No way. I think I'm there. For a little while, I have no cravings. No, you'll have them. I don't have my eye on anything. Now, I deleted Facebook from my phone.

That was big. When? I don't know, like a couple weeks ago. Probably around the time we got a brick. So I'm not, I'm not corresponding with people on Facebook market. The chase was always the problem. Yeah, it's the chase.

I loved the chase. Have you bought your spring summer wardrobe for this year yet? I don't have to look if so. Not really. I mean, well, there, it's coming then. But I don't even know how to dress for the summer.

I really don't. I hate dressing for the summer. Yeah, no one knows how. It's just impossible to look good. Yeah. That's not true. Unless you're on the Riviera.

Yeah. And you're wearing like linen pants with some fucking polo. You're going to look great this summer. Don't even say that. Summer's tough. It's a tough time for fits. Summer I just wear bathing. I just wear bathing suits and t-shirts.

That's it. Yeah. I pretty much in the summer I'm shirtless. I want to say like 99% of the same time. Yeah. Walking around tops, tarps off. I've never seen you shirtless one time in my life.

You don't see me in the summer. That is true. In the summer, like I'll walk down. I'll walk to the office. TARps off. Just flops on. Can we delay my birthday to do a pool party in the summer so that I can see you shirtless? No.

I would wear a scoop a suit. For my birthday, I want to see your shirtless. I think that's the least you can do. That's the one thing that would make me happy. For Charles. It's unfortunate because I want to give you something nice. And now I know I won't be able to do that. If you don't take your shirt off for me on my birthday, 37 is my.

last day on earth. That's my death day. My birthday is my death day. You better to start getting the funeral ready then. It's like that song, How to Save a Life. That's what it was about, one of a boy taking his shirt off for his other boy to save his life. If we're preparing for my funeral, I want you to pay me for, or pay for my outfit. You're going to get me an outfit for my funeral since you could have saved my life. No. And it's going to be a spring, summer outfit. I'm not taking my shirt off and I'm not buying an outfit either. He's going to put you in those Stan Smith that he's wearing right now and some dumbass Patriots pullover It's just tough, man.

I feel like I'm just suggesting fun things right now for Harry. Look, I got a lot of, I'd go to Fort Charles. I would give you a gaming laptop for free. You have to wear a shirt at Fort Charles. It's dressy there. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Sanny shirt.

You got to wear a shirt. Would you dress like this for Fort Chuck? No. You'd put on something a little nice. Is the fedora maybe? I'd probably get the fedora out. The fedora at stake night. How good of Harry that fedoras are in?

Oh, yeah. Not, no, your newsboy cap. Yeah, that's me. That's not a fedora, right? That's all me. And they're in because of that show. JFK Jr. The JFK Jr.

And Harry was wearing the newsboy cap before that show came out. Exactly. You had it. You were sucking off the Kennedy family for a minute. They were sucking me off. The Schlossberg family. They were sucking off the boy. Yeah.

You're tapped in. I'm tapped in. The Bouvier family. I'm enjoying this. I don't think we should stop. I have to pee pretty bad. Well, go ahead. You guys wanted to stop?

No, I don't have to stop at all. I'm gonna, oh, it's 422. Yeah, I got time. I'm so much more comfortable than I've ever been on the show. Yeah, so nice. I feel like you took a Xanax. This is so much better for me.

If I don't plug my phone in, I'd love to keep going. I'll plug it in for a second. I'll text my wife that she needs to fucking tend to the youth. Oh, come on now. It's her job. I win the bread I have to be out here winning the bread

I'd love to get into and I could see this being up your alley like a bread making like I saw somebody make a cinnamon swirl loaf and I was like I'd like for that to be a hobby of mine I admire that but my problem is that I don't eat bread yeah so I can't really get into that hobby

it is a white girl activity for sure yeah but I don't mind I don't mind talking to my inner white woman. Do you think that there's such a thing as trying to pursue too many different skills such that you lose the point of life? No, I think in the Renaissance, that's what they were doing. Well, that is always how I have directed my life, is to try to be as well-rounded as possible. That's how knights live their lives. Yeah.

So you're just being a modern day night with no one to battle. I'm telling you, if I had lived in the 1500s, I would. would have had my pick of the hottest 14-year-olds. Easily. Absolutely. Anyone I want. But the problem is no refrigeration. You wouldn't, they wouldn't keep.

The 14-year-old would go spoiled. That's true. They would go rotten. How did they, when did ice become a thing? I think they were just salting the 14-year-olds. They were, they were. Jesus. They were curing them.

They had to cure the 14 year old Of what? No, not of anything. Could we look up when ice first? I mean, how would you have gotten ice in the warmer months in medieval times? They did not have it. It was not available. 1850s when ice was available.

And how did they get it? They would make it? Or would they bring it in from really cold places? they'd bring it in and where would they send it when they were done with it 1968 they did what oh they'd make the ice in 1968 got it got it

wait a minute that's when they went on the people landed on the moon that can't be they were they were had ice before 1960 they were making it oh we're talking they had ice houses in medieval times oh okay I see yeah interesting He said he would have had the hottest 14-year-old in medieval times, but there was no refrigeration. Because I was so well-rounded.

Because he's a true Renaissance man. That I would have had my pick of the letter. The most pretty eligible wife 14-old in the land. You would have been the laziest radish farmer in the 1500s. Definitely. You would have been a surf on the outskirts of the kingdom fucking having to pick radish because it was the life that you were born into. You would have been dirty. you know you'd break into song like poor me

poor me I can't afford a little piece of bread I don't know if I know that one that's your singing oh I see I see I think I missed out on some of this we're talking about when they started ice and then Francis wanted to abolish ice and here we are

this is it interesting interesting you know Francis is platinum already I did know that Nice Yeah that's not bad I'm already black Shining That's a reason enough

To live through the year 37 Yeah I wonder how early I'll get diamond This year The best I've ever done I think was like October maybe When the book is done

Are you gonna go right to Japan You should Or maybe when it comes out You should go right to Japan I feel like that's something Kanye would do I have this dream of bringing a really expensive bottle of wine to Dave

and finishing the book and pulling it out and being like, what do you say, old boy? Yeah. And him being like, I don't drink. Yeah, I don't drink wine. No, he is a great, he's a great wine cellar at his house. He does.

He does. You're going to be in the, I mean, you should wear the mediglasses into his house. Got to. Map it out. Yeah. You map that bitch out like fucking. And you don't even have to say, say you're just sending it to your boys.

Yeah. I don't have to put it online. But then you're sending it to my friends. Posting this to my close friends. Yeah. But you do put it online. Yeah. You rack up to it.

Yeah. Should I do anything down there? Should I go fishing? In Miami? In the Keys. In the Keys. In the Keys. In Islamarada.

I don't just go fishing with Dave. Well. He's got rods. I don't know. That seems like asking a lot. Well, go fishing with Dave. He's got shotguns. I mean, that's got to be a great time to write.

A little water. this is where Hemingway spent a lot of time in the Keys. Of course. I've never spent any time down there. Oh, yeah, big. Have you ever been to Key West? I don't think so. I was quite underwhelmed.

There were some cute spots, but it's like, it's so Florida that it doesn't have this, like, castaway charm. It's like a beltway ring around that has Popeyes and Dunkin' Donuts and shit. It's like, what? I thought I was going to ride around on golf courses and, like, watch someone paint iguanas under a palm tree. I've never been. never been to the Keys I've been to Captiva

that's way farther is that way away I don't know that's on the Gulf Coast on the golf coast yeah the left coast the west coast the best coast

yeah what about uh is there a nice part of the Keys is there a good part there probably where Dave lives and there's probably really nice parts of Key West that I just wasn't definitely

dude Key West is a full two hours from Dave's home why the fuck is he at where he's at he just wants to be an hour and a half out of Miami I don't know. He's an hour and a half from Miami? There must be a private airport near there, right?

He probably likes to drive, too, clear his mind. I think he's got his own runway in the front yard. He's taking... He's taking cigarette boats, like a cocaine smuggler, like a cocaine cowboy. Yeah. That would be hilarious to see Dave just like riding like one of those pirates. Standing on it. Francis.

Good. All right. All right. Should we wrap this up? Yeah. We can wrap. All right. Thank you guys for listening.

I'm going to be in Arlington, Virginia, this weekend, four shows, Friday, Saturday, tickets at harrisettled website.com. Also tickets for Detroit and Cleveland next weekend on harrisotov website.com. I'll be in Denver, Houston. San Francisco, the LA show for the Netflix fest is online now. And Minneapolis, all of that's on punchup. Live slash Francis Ellis. See you there.