Son of a Boy Dad - White Russians | Son of a Boy Dad #290

Episode Date: April 8, 2025

White Russians | Son of a Boy Dad #290 .......... "The Gang Starts a Business" -- #Ad: Go to https://TempoMeals.com/BOYDAD for 60% off your first box! -- #Ad: Download the Gametime app today and use code BOYDAD for $20 off your first purchase -- #Ad: Grab Popeyes new lineup of bold, pickle-flavored products on Uber Eats. Try them all while they’re here! -- #Ad: GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, [phone] or visit gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit ccpg.org (CT), or visit www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Max. $150 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos. Ends 4/13/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. -- Follow us on our socials: https://linktr.ee/sonofaboydad -- Merch: https://store.barstoolsports.com/collections/son-of-a-boy-dad -- SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE #SonOfABoyDad #BarstoolSportsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/sonofaboydad

Hey, son of a boy, dad listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Shall we? Is that running? problem call 1-800-GAMBLER. In New York, call 877-8-HOPE-NY or text HOPE-NY 467369. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boothill Casino in Resorting, Kansas, 21 and over, age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Voighton, Ontario, new customers only. Bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see dkng.co.au Alrighty.

Are we all waiting to see if it's going to come up? It's not moving, right? No, moving right no it is just moving very slow what I Think it's set to a wider It's set to a wider screen so that it's not it's not the edge There it is there we go. Yeah, yeah. I see. Little mental insurance. Oh yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. How in the world is this? Yeah. All right. Welcome back to the podcast. Bro, why is this blanket in here? I don't know, but you look quite comfortable. It smells, has a smell to it.

Why are you wearing it around your shoulders then? I didn't smell it until it was out around until I was shrouded in this blanket Smelly blankets brutal every time you guys start the podcast while I'm playing chess I lose Just want to say that stop playing chess minutes before we start the podcast I never know when we're gonna start the episode you guys are always out. You know I'm not playing Sudoku over here Doing willy Willy nilly stuff playing foraging Fucking words with friends over here brother diarrhea

Every time I don't ever have diarrhea here. I have occasionally You tell us that you do wait. That was crazy in the same sentence. You just refuted your own claim He does that a lot if you if you pay attention Sass will a certain assertion and then if you let it you know unravel long enough He walks it back and says the opposite walk it back in real time. Mm-hmm I have a good so I went fly fishing this weekend and I caught ten fish ten fish and One fish two fish fish, red fish, blue fish? And we talked about it a little bit on the other episode but I got to use

Patron's rod. Beautiful rod. I mean just unbelievably. Billy's rod. But I fell multiple times while fishing. Why? And I do commonly. Drinking? No, I slip. His inner ear has always been fucked. Because I'm in the- Tinnitus? Tinnitus. The river that I fish is uh, it's like notoriously rocky. So you're constantly walking on slippery rocks.

And I think I gotta get like studs for my boots or something because I'm taking falls that I'm like, one of these is gonna be bad. You're gonna wear crampons underwater? I think that's what people do. Let's get you some waterproof crampons. I think people put studs on their boots. I don't think they're necessarily crampons. I'll tell you what, I'm gonna tell you something right now.

There are no studs that are gonna help underwater like that. Dude, I fell while I had a fish hooked, and then I got up and it was still hooked. That's pretty baller. It was pretty sick. I just up and it was still hooked. That's pretty baller. It was pretty sick I just maintained that tight line Damn cuz I was fishing barbless because as you guys know in Washington the guy made me pinch all my barbs Yeah, you're like I tried to find the footage of that by the way. It's like you got to like call the office

Yeah, yeah, you have to do the Freedom of Information Act Like fill out forms. Yeah form you have to fill out I thought it was just gonna be like on like a database somewhere that I could just download the video He thought that all of them are already published. Yeah, every police encounter. Well, I think they technically are all public They're public public record West. Yeah, and you have to have a reason as to why you want them I can be like I'm the guy in the video In your account from theirs I think you could just say there's a discrepancy in your account from theirs. Unfair warning or something like that.

Yeah, but I want to give that guy a hard time. He was nice. Well, it's not going to give him a hard time. We're just going to get the information released to you. He's probably going to be like, why are they pulling tapes from my footage? Am I doing something wrong? You could take away his qualified immunity. Wow.

Yeah. I don't want to give that guy, I don't want to make that guy's life any harder. I don't think it would, but it's nice that you kept that fish on the line It's like that video. Have you ever seen the video? I think it's like a Houston Astros fan or something some thing gets knocked out in one of those stadium concourse brawls But he holds up his 24 ounce beer as he's knocked out the entire time. I've seen that. I've seen that. Isn't that a classic? Great video. Hmm yeah, it was good, but I'm in nasty falls.

Where'd you land on? What part of your body? My knee. Oh. And then my shin. Fell forward? Same leg both times. Better than your rump though.

I tore my, there's a leak in my waders from falling. Got out of the, got back to the car to take off my waders. My right leg is just sopping wet. Everything else is dry, but my right leg is soaked.'re gonna need new ones now Patrimon did you have a picture of it of the fall yeah now so how do we even know what happened brother point yeah I mean how do we know it that you even fell at all if there's not video evidence on the water like that they'd probably have that I can show you guys I was very deep in waterer than I was when we fished?

Uh, around that. No, you guys told me I was too deep. Were you guys going deep sea fishing? Like, I was up to my... I thought when you guys fished for Kobe, it was... Here's a good photo. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Why are you pointing at, like, a TV remote? Because I wanted to make the same face as the fish. Ha ha ha. But I am pretty deep. Like, that's deep water. Why are you pointing at like a TV remote? I wanted to make the same face as the fish But I am pretty deep like that's deep water not as deep as why do you ever fall in that you're fucked Why don't you ever publish these I? Don't know Because if I took a picture like that it'd be if I had a picture of me with the fish like that it'd be on Instagram immediately look at that one look at that bird Beautiful bird actually is that's why is that not one of the best fish you've ever caught wasn't that big

that looks pretty big to me by it by your standard I think that's big just because of the camera angle because I'm holding it up in front of the camera hmm makes it look be the one I caught in Washington was way bigger than that but you were holding it close to your body yeah so it could get wide enough you didn't eat because there's no need to cold it close in that You're already using this attack in the back exactly yeah, you got the fat barrel Yeah, thank you bat this one. They already knew it was a fucking beast. We gotta go whitewater rafting Oh, man, dude. It was nice though. It was such good fishing

They just wants to just stock the water cuz opening day was April 5th They are such good fishing. They just want us to just stock the water. Because opening day was April 5th. Where are the fish before they stock the water? China. No, they're in like a pond or like a fucking... They're in hotel lobbies in China. Why are they in the lobby?

They're just decoration. Oh, I see. Corporate centers. Open fish lobbies. Decoration decorative corporate Corporate centers open in the middle open Fish lobbies made me fired up to get out there this summer on a nice like dude the the flex on this rod incredible The mend like I was able to mend the line just like with a flick just like that Holy shit.

Fly fishing I think does feel better when you catch a fish than it does on a regular line. Because when you catch a fish fly fishing like you set the hook and then it's like you feel every movement of the fish underwater. Because you're holding the line. It's my favorite. You've never done it. We've got to get you tight.

You think I've never caught a fish fly fishing? I do. You're wrong. When have you? I was at Glacier National Park. Oh. Fly fishing and I caught one through the eye. Really? Yeah. False head. Well I reeled it in. False, false hook. False front. I've false hooked a lot of fish. Happens. Yeah, but he bringing him in by the spine. Mm-hmm I guess is a tough scene Those are the ones that you don't even take out of the water. I didn't earn this you take a picture You're like cuz that because when you catch a fish like that you're like it they fight way different So you can tell pretty easily cuz you're like, why does this fish feel like it's 30 pounds?

Mm-hmm, and then you bring it in it's an eight inch trout and you're like, oh cuz I hooked it by it's fucking fin right and it's battling flailing around Damn, I gotta fucking eat one of these fish that you're catching. I know I Home cuz I their loan back with it cuz that river well I could have in Washington now the one in Washington was catching release only to how did Helen Keller learn to communicate? Yeah, it doesn't make any sense. I don't think she was communicating at all. She was just like biting She wrote a book. She wrote a book through bite marks. She like bit Braille into a book. She really bite Did she really write the book?

She she bit. Yeah, she had Francis. she bite the book or did she write the book? Alright, I'm going to say every letter of the alphabet. Bite me when I hit the right one. Yeah, yeah. Okay? B. Oh no. R. I don't, I mean... It was Tommy Smokes translating what Helen Keller really meant.

The stories of Helen Keller make her seem like just a problem You know Like they had her just out in a fucking box They just had her in like a shed. What stories are you talking about around in here? What stories are you talking about? We've talked about Helen Keller multiple times on the podcast and this is how it always goes times on the podcast and this is how it always goes. But even like when I read those books when I was like I was like 10 when you have to read all that shit. I don't even I don't remember reading a book I just remember there being like tale of or we would learn about Helen Keller a biting woman but I remember learning about it and

being like why what was the purpose of this? She's remarkable. She's remarkable. It's like some weird fucking Nazi science that for some reason we had this girl in like a... just a shed alone, just like throwing shit around all day. Trying to bite her way through the lock. And then some lady would come by every day and like take notes.

No, this is what she's saying. Yeah, this is what she does.. Yeah, this is what she does. She's in a good mood right now. She's just, ah. She enjoyed the raisins. Roll over her face. There's foam coming out of her mouth. Chain hanging on either side.

You're the resident expert on Helen Keller. I just don't believe she did. Do you think it was a conspiracy? I think it was like someone else wrote the book. They were probably getting paid by the word They're like I can get out of here faster if I just say she was if she meant she wrote the book I'm gonna look this up because then that was probably why it sold so well because then she went to do the book signings And everyone was like there's no fucking way

She wrote this book and then the lady that wrote it was like no she did and they were like, alright Well, we got her buy it and read it. She's just tipping over every stack of books at the bookstore. Yeah. Yeah She went through the hard copies Did I Too good questions actually do they sell the Bible at like Barnes and Noble? Yes, you went to like a Barnes and Noble you just buy the Bible. Yep for sure. That's pretty cool, too I know but you just buy the Bible. Yep for sure. That's pretty cool to They sell the best-selling book of all time at the biggest bookstore you never know

Yeah, like that is weird that you could just go like I could just buy the Bible on like my Kindle Why is that weird? I don't know you'd think it would be you think you'd have to go to like some separate You think you'd have to go to the church you think it'd be more exclusive. Yeah, Helen's teacher spelled letters and words into her hand. Mmm. I guess that's how she taught her But Helen Keller was blind deaf and mean dumb right mute No, she was an idiot. I think she was a genius dumb as the She was dumb as rocks. Yeah, that's what you're asking but for some reason they phrased it into like she was

like for some reason when you're younger you think it's like Albert Einstein and then Helen Keller, he's just been blind deaf and dumb like You can't speak oh no, I didn't know that Oh no, I didn't know that. That's news to me. But why would you say with so much certainty that she was dumb? Oh no, she was dumb as rocks. Because she definitely was. If you don't see or hear anything, you can't be smart. So what? Yeah, she knew the alphabet.

That's impressive. You're saying because she never learned something, she couldn't be smart? I don't think she was like... Because she couldn't read a book, she couldn't be smart? Like she wasn't like Stephen Hawking. No, but nobody is. No one's calling her Stephen Hawking either. She was smart for her circumstances.

She did the most with the least. Yeah. She wrote a book. Oh. Supposedly. I feel like you can't just start with the alphabet in the hand. No. You have to start with like, yes, no, sex. Oh, she eventually learned to hand. No. You have to start with like yes, no, sex. Oh, she eventually learned to speak. Oh. But her speech was never as clear as she would have liked. How did

she know? How did we know? Think of that. Learning to speak when you've never been able to hear. That's got to sound. Horrific. Tough. Yeah, it's got to be tough. Because I think that there are deaf people who lose their hearing and continue to speak and it sort of becomes... There's a woman on last season of the Great British Bake Off who is deaf but she speaks perfectly. Is that so?

Yeah, she has like a signer but but whenever she's talking up, Paul, Hollywood There's a woman in the Good Shepherd is the one he really loves the one he really loves is Deaf really mm-hmm. I got no problem with the deaf community sounds like you do. I'm sure they're watching right now You just insulted their hero. I don't think that's their hero. I'm sure they're watching right now. Who just insulted their hero? I don't think that's their hero though, I think that's a common misconception. Who is their hero? The guy from Koda? What do you think? Every deaf person has like a Helen Keller poster in their room? Definitely.

Like a fathead? What does she look like? If she looked like anything like the girl from the Great British Bake Off. I'm imagining her looking like the girl from the fucking Conjuring. From the girl from the ring. Oh there she is. She's... ooh. She looks pretty normal. You think so? She lived for almost a hundred years. She looks like just a normal old lady. But I want to see where she's a child. She got better looking in later life, it looks like.

It looks like as she became more capable of speaking, she could probably ask for things like a hairbrush. Oh, hang on, bro. She actually looks very normal when she's younger, too. She actually looks right. When she's a child. She looks like a normal child. They got a picture of her here smelling a rose Yes, saw that that's got to be her only joy in life Hmm must have been incredible to smell shit. She could probably smell what people were saying Yeah, her teacher taught her to read lips by Pressing things into her lips.

Are you sure she was blind? I'm pretty sure, yeah. She's looking right at the camera in this picture. And not in the way that some blind people look at the camera. I mean she's truly one of the figures of history. Yes, she was blind and deaf. And, but not dumb. And dumb as fuck.

No. Those were your, but not dumb. And dumb as fuck. No. Those were your words, not mine. She learned to speak later in life, but she didn't like, never as well as she would have liked. So she didn't want to speak. That's gotta be, I mean at that point you'd be like, you gotta give us something. They're like, you can speak and you're not speaking? What are we, how are we supposed to communicate?

She graduated cum laude from Radcliffe College. Radcl have this Harvard before yeah before it was before Harvard really like when I was the women's college And what so she was a fucking genius if you was smart or she was given neck to the professors you think she was talking How do you spell penis? Press it up against her lips I'm just kidding that shit is not nasty. just kidding. That shit is not funny. That shit is not funny at all. But I mean 1880 to 1968 she like basically heard about the moon landing. Yeah. She lived through both world wars.

There was probably like slaves that she knew, like people who used to be slaves. I mean she's from Alabama. She probably slaves. Yeah, like witnessed the moon landing. Yeah, not witnessed Sick life for her. She was alive for the Titanic Yeah, she really saw it all and both World Wars and Vietnam or no No, not Vietnam Vietnam, but the Korean War She definitely was around for the Korean War. I wonder what she thought about it if you guys could have now Yeah, she was alive for Vietnam if you guys yeah 1955 to 1975

If you guys could have grown up she didn't get to see the ending of it Probably for the best yeah I was waving that L waving that white flag probably her last thought was like at least we're gonna win no it'll kind of just vaguely end the soldier will come home and everyone will be mad at them yeah we're gonna be really upset with the soldiers. They'll be addicted to heroin or something. If we could live in any age... No, I was gonna say, if you guys could have grown up in any other part of the country with its sort of specific culture from that region, what would it have been?

Let's say you could have grown up in South Carolina and your family was obsessed with college football and tailgates and you ended up going to Ole Miss or some shit and having that ridiculous haircut that all those mopish southern boys have and you wear the polo shirt with the school emblem and khaki shorts with a lanyard sticking out of your pocket. It definitely wouldn't be California. It definitely wouldn't be surfer bro culture. I probably would just stick with Mass. Okay, that's really not the exercise, is it though? And even if it were the exercise, that is the worst possible answer that you could give for this exercise. Why? I liked growing up in Massachusetts.

He said, what other place do you think you would have wanted to live? Other. I missed other. I don't think you would have wanted to live? Other. I missed other. Um... I don't think you missed it. I did. Let's see. You thought I said if you guys could have grown up anywhere including your own home. It's kind of how I took it, yeah.

I guess I would go... Being like a good old boy from Texas would be nice. Mm hmm. I also think Pacific Northwest culture is nice, but also like, like especially 90s grungy, but uh, damn depressing. Yeah. I don't know if I would want to live out there. It rains a little too much. But if that's what you're born into, you really don't know the difference. True.

I wonder what state has the highest retention rate of its youth and generations, right? The least amount of drain and exodus. Hmm. Where kids grow up there and they say, I'm never leaving. It's got to be Cali. I don't think so. I think it's got to be like Colorado. I think it's got to be like Arkansas or something where people don't have the opportunity to leave.

Colorado I think it's got to be like Arkansas or something where people don't have the opportunity to leave You know people don't have like the financial ability to get somewhere else like we think of one of the poorer states Arkansas Mississippi, I think my answer is a massive state my answer by the way would have been Colorado I think If I could have grown up anywhere other than Maine it would oh wow yeah, yeah, Yeah I think Colorado for me would have been the answer. I thought we were still on retention What's jumping around? What does anal retentive mean? It's a good question. What does it actually mean? No. No, what where does it come from? What is what's being retained? It's good question. You're why is anal? Somehow a synonym for why does it also mean someone who's like, particular?

Really particular, right? And specifically the term anal retentive. Does that mean that you're just holding your ass so tight that shit will never leave it? And how does that correlate to being particular? Has to be something else. I think it's just kind of like a guy who won't shit everywhere, you know? He'll pick and choose. Like you. Like Nick.

Well you say you never diarrhea in the office, except for sometimes when you diarrhea in the office. Yeah, like Nick only shits at his house. But I don't think of him as an anal retentive guy. I don't think he's anal. I'm thinking more of like a tight ass, like who has worked here, like I guess... KB got me indoor skydiving tickets for my birthday. I'm thinking more of like a tight ass like who has worked here like I guess KB got me a sky indoor skydiving tickets for my birthday. Oh, I got this I got this for you The term anal retentive comes from Freud's theory of psychosexual development Specifically the anal stage which occurs around ages one to three

When children focus on bowel and bladder control So I think you guys were kind of on the hunt Interesting Freud believed that individuals who experienced conflicts or fixations during this stage might develop personality traits associated with excessive control orderliness and frugality Do you think that there's a chance that Freud was just a sexual deviant and he just projected it on everybody? Yeah, definitely probably So that you actually all want to fuck your mom. Yeah, it's not just me that wants to fuck my mom you Psychologically have to want to fuck your mom. Would you say that you're anal retentive?

No, okay, so let me give you some of the things that characterize it. Orderliness and neatness, obviously you're out. Stinginess and possessiveness, I don't know if that really applies. Would you call yourself stingy? No. Possessive? No. Me neither.

Stubbornness and obstinacy, that you are. Difficulty adapting to change or compromise. Like that's all one thing, that's you to a T. What do I have difficulty? Adapting to change or compromise? Yeah. You don't compromise. Yes I do.

No you don't. Yeah I do. Look what's happening right now. Yeah because you're telling me, you can't just tell someone they don't compromise and then be surprised when they say they do. I'm not even meaning this as a slight. But I think I do compromise. I think you're telling me you can't just tell someone they don't compromise and then be surprised when they say they do I'm not even meaning this is a slight, but I think I do compromise I think you're let's give an example Rome wanted you to come on the show to be a permanent member

And I was like no fucking shot now here we are I Fully believe that no that's not true at all. I fully believe I was joking Just trying to get some jokes off respect you wrote that one you can't put that toothpaste back in the tube that is the truth no it's not that's not out come on that's so damaging you know that's not he's about to leave for a month I'm gonna fuck it's gonna be just off I'm gonna hold that over you people aren't even gonna know Ron's gone right

because we're gonna have bang to every episode. Perfectionism. A relentless pursuit of perfection in all aspects of life. Okay, yeah, that's not you. That's not you. Perfectionist? Perfectionist? Perfectionism.

The only one here that applies. You don't think you're stubborn? I think you're a little bit stubborn. No, I would say I'm definitely stubborn. So those are the two. I think you're pretty stingy. I don't think I'm stingy. I don't think you're necessarily...eh.

I think you're pretty stingy. I don't think I'm stingy. I don't think you're necessarily. Yeah, I Think you're I think you're frugal Through I think you're frugal and I mean that I don't even mean that as a slight either is frugal necessarily bad No, I think you save your money. I think you're like you don't spend a lot You're a bit of a sting lord spend thrift. I kind of spend a lot you thrifty. I'm a gearhead You're shallow with the pussy. You're definitely shallow with the pussy. She's shallow She's shallow that Jake hole Fool me with the pussy. She's shallow You haven't shallow with the pussy recently

Too shallow with the pussy I have noticed that about you. Have I been a little too shallow with the pussy? I mean, I think it's a good time to say it. I think it's the most... Yo, we've actually been meaning to talk to you. You've been a little bit shallow with the pussy. I've been really shallow with the pussy lately. Dude, I've been working on it.

Fool me three times, fuck the peace signs. I'm in therapy. Trying to work on how I can get deeper in the pussy. Mm-hmm What did he even mean when he's talking about she's shallow with the pussy? I don't know most of Jake's lyrics are like that But he decided to sing that one. Yeah, you know that's what I like about Jake hole and Drake though So they're not afraid to bring out the melodies the melodies right Kendrick

You never hear Kendrick singing like that Drake has a new song out He has a whole new album out right? You listened did you see he reached out to Bieber and was like do you want to do some music and Bieber left them on red? Go cuz Bieber's I got his own shit going on right now Because yeah, cuz he wants Selena so bad because Benny's fucking Selena Yeah, because he wants Selena so bad because Benny's fucking Selena Benny Bieber like regularly posting just shit where he's like on a shit ton of drugs. I think there's just Constant videos, but he looks like zanned and perked out like he's on beat out looks emaciated. He's still married is yeah

Yeah to Haley and what's going on there? Is she okay with that? I can't imagine she's thrilled about it. Well she's obsessed with Selena too. What? Have you ever seen the videos of like all the- I don't think it has anything to do with Selena Gomez. It has everything to do with Selena Gomez.

It probably has to do with people figuring out that he was diddled by fucking P. Diddy. I think it's a lot to do. And everyone coming to terms with like, yeah he 100% was. Did you see the new tattoo? He got this week. Yeah, it's shit is sick. It's amazing horses. Don't stop. They keep going young thug Yeah now It's still fucking plays though. It's a sick tattoo. I got to get that but but Haley Haley Bieber his wife has been obsessed with Selena Gomez for years.

But hasn't Selena Gomez been obsessed with her too? Like I think Selena's not, not uh, I think she takes some blame here. No, bro. For what they're doing to JB. Selena's with Benny. Yeah, but that's a rebound. No, it's not, bro. 15 years later.

Is she rebounding with him because her face is round? The round mound of the rebound. You have always been anti round face whose face is rounder Selena Gomez or Sabrina Carpenter Well, I think you're the one to the perfect one to answer that cuz you're a big fan of both I you're a big Sabrina guy aren't you no he's like Sabrina Ionescu NYU Liberty right I fuck with Sabrina Carpenter too. We should get her on the show. I love Sabrina Carpenter. Selena Gomez. I'm working late.

Face. Face. I've got a spot at the upstairs room with the stans. Look at that. I'm working late. That's a round face. Cause I'm a comic. I'm working late.

I'm doing frantic. Still doing frantic. I'm doing frantic. I'm doing frantic. I'm doing frantic. I'm doing frantic. I'm doing frantic. I'm doing frantic. Starts at nine now, jizzin' as bad. I'm so depressed they cancelled real ass podcast. Poor girl bro. Yeah, I like Sabrina.

Selena didn't really ever do anything really after Wizards Waverly Place though What that was kind of her peak? Well, she's that Kygo song. It was huge. Oh, no. Oh, no my friend one hit wonder You've been asleep at the wheel. She's got a lot of hits You guys weren't cuz you guys weren't you guys weren't really like watching Wizards Waverly Place. I was outside bro. That shit was She's in the trash. She was in the trans musical the one that won the Oscar What's that? Didn't it win like best picture? Oh She was in that I also didn't know that was about trans people. Oh, yeah

There's like a you haven't seen the clip of them running through the hospital singing Nope, it's a banger. I was watching the Bob Dylan movie hospital singing nope it's a banger I was watching the Bob Dylan movie yeah when you're looking bad that type of shit mm-hmm come gather around people terrible wherever you are terrible too much rasp and show them how it's done because you can't do it. Oh bro, I have a good ass gift to give you next episode. I don't really do a good Dylan in his prime as much as I do a good post-prime Dylan. Right.

How about him? Did we talk about him reposting MGK? No, I don't think so. That's sick that he did. Did he? Yeah. What do you post? He posted MGK on his Instagram? He's always doing shit. I don't know if it's actually him. He's always tweeting definitely him, bro He'll always be like, oh, I saw the background I saw the backup drummer of the of the kinks in an elevator last night in Dublin Wish him nothing but the best who else could it be and then you're like what?

He'll randomly just tweet that shit. I don't know Maybe he's got like it could be like the situation with like the Trump Remember the video of Trump from the dictating Kamala take this down. He's like tweet this Yeah, but you think that there's no way Bob Dylan is like has someone else there or is dictating He's got to have someone running his social media I think that he's just plugged in bro You're thinking of Zimmerman You're thinking of George Zimmerman. He could be he honestly could be tweeting those

I mean how old Bob Dylan now what he's got to be like 83 84 I was so disgusted when I found out that Bob Dylan shot Trayvon Martin. I Was hurt That's a crazy lyric Oh my ocean, but they do look alike they do but it's what a wild thing to say Yeah, that song was experimental I Love that song. What is that song called? Nikes? Yeah, that's Nikes these bitches want Nikes the best song on that album though is is a

picture of future of free the last song Francis you ever get into Frank Ocean. Yeah, I like Frank Ocean Blonde same name kind of see Francis Frank Francis Ocean Did I like to have long things to do with moonlight Not that I know lost in the heat of the moon that one I think that one's a good one. What is that? That's a Frank Ocean song? It's probably his biggest hit. Well I'm not really a hits guy for Frank. Cause then yeah, then you got lost. Yeah what do you think of Moonlight? I don't know, I think for some reason when I watched that movie for the first time. Cause you're saying

cause you're gay. No I think he tweeted something about it And I thought he like directed the movie or some shit Shout out to Moonlight, those brothers look just like me They kinda did I guess Those gay bros look just like me Those brothers fuck just like me That guy in Moonlight, jacked Yeah, you got a thing for him Do you fuck with those dudes that are making the waking up content?

What's that? Because they kind of got that build too. You haven't seen those videos of the brothers online who are posting and they'll be dunking their face in the ice water in the morning. Oh, maybe. You should make one of those videos. You guys too, Jacked. I think that's a little silly.

I think you should make one. Well, I think this would be the worst time possible to make one of those. I think you have to, because like everybody, cause like Mr. Beast and like Mark Zuckerberg were making that video. There's like a critical tipping point where like. But I think Francis could do it unironically and do it very well.

If you just did an actual wake up, I think if you did a funny ass like my daily routine video and narrated it, I think that you could murder that. I think that you did a funny ass like my daily routine video and narrated it I think that you could murder that I Think that's fun like you being like my overnight oats just finished Breakfast time and then it shows the clock and it's 3 a.m. I think people would believe that yeah People would people believe anything you said it would make sense as to why you get sleepy like early Yeah, cuz it's like oh yeah, Francis has been up since 2 It's midnight for him right now. He has he's a grinder

I'm trying to think if I have anything interesting to contribute. Of course you do brother. We're kind of just tagging you up I know I back Aren't you fighting back today? It's never a good time when one of your boys stops fighting back Goes limp then you that's gonna need wallow to talk them off the bridge Yeah Did you see that clip of wallow that a guy was about to jump off of a bridge and like somebody was just driving by And wallow was like being like don't fucking jump like they just caught her a candid moment of Wallo trying to talk someone literally off of the ledge.

Was that real? Real or fake? What do you think? 100% real. 100% real. Because there's a cop there being like don't stop filming. 100% real. I could see it. That's the kind of guy you want in your corner. Oh my god. Wallo on the suicide prevention hotline would have the numbers at zero. Yeah.

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What time is it? Game Time. I would do, if I saw someone about to jump off a bridge, I would jump in in front of them to do what Clarence does in It's a Wonderful Life. Yeah. No. Then they'd have to jump in to save me.

And therefore by that property property I have saved them. Right, it's a little... I thought you meant you were going to throw yourself in and break the water so that when they hit the water they don't die. You know, break the surface. I always plan to do that. Take off a shoe as I'm falling, throw it, break the surface. I don't think that actually does anything.

Definitely not. There's no way I could even reach my foot in that that scenario I think the whole reason that divers do that is to see the water no it's to see the water what do you mean it creates ripples yeah which allows them as they're flipping oh to know how close they are on a flat water they can't see it that makes sense cliff divers whenever they throw the the fucking rock off and then just follow the rock sick that might be to break the water No, they they throw the GoPro off, right? Oh, that's sick, too And then they get to film them as they're falling. That's cool because everything falls at the same speed

Right 10 meters per second per second once it reaches Terminal velocity then we're fucked And shit gets a little messy then you should start speeding up slowing down isn't it true that not everything falls at the same in a vacuum things fall at the same speed right so in the absence of friction and things like that, a feather and a rock only fall at the same speed in a vacuum, right? I don't know.

I just remember in science class they did that show where they had a bowling ball and a tennis ball and they fell at the same speed. I think that feather's being acted on by wind. But feathers obviously aren't going to fall at the same speed as a bowling ball. Yeah, but everything I think of a certain mass, the human body, all human bodies fall at the same, once you jump out of a plane, you reach terminal velocity. Yeah. No matter what your mass is, even if a piano or an elephant were thrown out of the plane. So I don't know why these fat boys are so cocky.

But it, but it takes a minute. You accelerate at different speeds to that. Oh, I see. So I think that initially, you know, one would be ahead of the other. Should I call my dad right now? This is right up his alley. This is physics. Yeah. And it's, I love this stuff. I'm kind of a physics head myself. What kind though? Biophysics?

Molecular physics? Molecular? Molecular? True. I mean biophysics could be molecular physics. It's all the same. Right. Do you know what the chemical symbol for iron is?

IR? No. Think of my name iron is? IR? No. Think of my name, brother. RO. Close. AD. Closer. FR.

Closest. FE. Yeah. Yeah. And the way people remember that is Francis Ellis pumps iron. Really? That's what they taught you guys in school? That's what my whole class remembered it.

That's sick. Which made me feel cool. That was when you had to get in the gym. Yeah. Did you get in the gym at an early age? No. You're not an early gym guy? No. When did you start running consistently? Pumping iron?

College. Yeah? Yeah. I remember going to the gym, like the YMCA, with my mom when I was in like fifth grade, just having no idea what to do. My dad didn't lift weights. He's just a scientist. And so no one was there to teach me and I was just like doing like leg extensions because that was like the thing that embarrassed me the least. You know what I mean? I was going to climb onto the fucking bench press. Put some tens on. I can't wait to get into the gym I can't

wait to just go punish myself later yeah it's crazy you're a nighttime worker out or I'm gonna go punish myself sometimes yeah and just the fact that I've not I haven't you know I went on that golf trip and didn't get in the gym because we were fucking walking the courses every day and it was mountainous. Yeah, but that's a good workout. It was. Probably getting like 20,000 steps in a day. That's exactly right. That's what the golf course was, was 20,000 steps. Yeah. But that doesn't do anything for my delts, my traps. It's packs. Should just hit some push-ups, pull-ups, set-ups, crunches. Fuck's he gonna do a pull-ups, set-ups, crunches.

The fuck's he gonna do a pull-up, bro? He's in God's country. You can always find somewhere to do a pull-up. They say Chattanooga, Tennessee is the city that has the highest readership of the Bible in America. That's so sick. They do refer to it as God's country. They must have a lot of Barnes and Nobles down there for people to purchase all these Bibles. People refer to Maine as God's country, too. I don't know about that can anybody publish one by

referred it to me as to man is God's country we should come out with barstool Bibles I had might mind I had a fake ID my personal Bible would be sick I got to get those gone but uh I had a visual son of a boy dad barstool Bible I think we should start selling shit like that I mean King James is just like he just slapped his name on the Bible. Really? King James edition. He's just like... LeBron's got a Bible? I think we could. LeBrible? Dude I think that the white Russian mix is so on the table right now. Oh I think we got to get get it out after KFC was able to come out with his midnight bean Martin

Martinez, I think if I go a white Russian mix, but it's powdered milk. I Think people will buy those. I think they will buy it if it's just if it's if it's unpowdered No, I think we got to go powdered I think we'd sell more because people don't want it because then like because if like people bought them as merch as like Oh, this is funny And then you wait until the holidays to open it out or milk is gonna like you could put that on like your desk Leave that there forever. Yeah, you can't you can't keep regular milk You know what we should do is we should do a limited run and have the number one out of 50 on each on each

Thing yeah each tin. Yeah, and then do a commemorative tin What should we call it? white russian mix But it has to have something to do with us No, it doesn't you don't think we should have it nothing to do with us No son of a boy dad anywhere son of a boy dad's white I think it's just a carton because we have technically we have three sides to work with the fourth side has to be the nutrients And shit, right and I think well second side has to be a missing child. Okay, and then we have two other sides to play with all right

You want not I think the two sides we just throw a massive barstool logo on them It wraps around nothing about son of a boy dad. Yeah, I think that would play so hard But I like other people are able to come out with different merch. Why not us? Why can't we have a box of powder that we just sell? Maybe it's like our secret recipe. Yeah. And then the container is what you use.

So like we tell it, we have the ingredients and the ingredients is just milk. You add milk to the powdered milk? Maybe it's just a carton. Just add milk. Yeah. But then obviously. Is there vodka in it? Yeah, I think there would have to be.

No, I think you add vodka, add milk. We'll have vodka and Kaluah. We're just going to make, we're going to make, we'll call it White Russian Mix. But it's not. It's just vodka and Kaluah, and then you've got to add milk. You just add milk because milk is perishable. Yeah.

Well, that's why I say powdered milk, I think, because it's non-perishable. I think it just lasts longer. Right right so if we just had a box of powdered milk last forever I think yeah so I think that you add Kaluah ad vodka to the powder milk so we just have a we're just selling a container of powder milk yeah yeah yeah yeah and you open the top of it and then you like cut off the top with scissors to make it a nice clean edge. Yeah. And then you pour the ingrid- pour water, Kaluah, and vodka into it.

Yeah. I think we could get it to just be just Kaluah and vodka in addition to the powdered milk. We'd have- we'd have some- So no water. Water to taste. To go, so I think. Oh yeah, to go. Yeah.

Yeah. Like nips. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Nips. Yeah. I think, yeah, I think water like add water as needed. You know, it's not required. Oh, now you're getting into a very then then it's very subjective and nobody knows the right. Everyone wants to know exactly how they're supposed to make this cocktail.

How do you make powdered milk into milk? I think it is probably an add water situation. How much so? Tablespoon. Yeah there's a tablespoon of water Have one tablespoon of water to taste yeah But his tablespoons done necessarily the same as my tablespoon unless we're actually using a tablespoon a table spoon But then it could be like oh you make a really good

Instant white Russian because you know how much to do it's like how you make it old-fashioned so buy two you got to buy two Well, it's like you want you want to fuck up yeah I wanted to choose one to lose yeah and then one to make just right when's the best time to drink a white Russian winter got it so we'll have the summer or the summer to figure it out of the summer to go taste test you know get out go to the fact go to the milk factory watch them chipping the milk into we tried 700 different types of milk To find what the perfect

bar stool white Russian mix was I Think we could dude. I think we got to do it. Why can't we? Like sure we could we could sell it for a bunch We will sell them for $40. They're called they'll cost 50 cents to make like that guy who sells the lemonade in Nobody else is selling white we didn't we would check the market and we saw that there was nobody else selling powdered milk white Russians For 25 bucks a pop. That's when we realized we are the market. We control the market Yeah, in fact, we didn't see anyone else selling powdered milk white Russians period

And that's when we started to realize boy these things really taste like shit I think this is a great like dude. I think if we did this if we made this Obviously, it's a joke But we were somehow able to get on shark tank with it if we told them that change that would change dollars Yeah, if mr. Wonderful could get lip on this. I think this would be our like this would be Shark Tank with it? If we told them that it was 50 cents, that would change the bars. Yeah. If Mr. Wonderful could get lip on this. I think this would be our, like, this would be, if we go to Shark Tank and we stay completely in character

and we're pitching our white Russian mixes. If Lori could just have one gulp of white Russian mix. All right, hit me with your pitch. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. All right, and we're all coming in at the same time. Us three. Sharks! You probably are tired of having to go to the bar and order a white Russian with perishable

milk. No, we'll start out with like, white Russian might seem like a drink you only really get once in a while. You go to a nice cocktail bar, you get a guy guy you figure he could probably make a good white Russian Why why not make white Russians from your home? But I think we have to illustrate that there's our kind of you have a white Russian at the comfort of your own home No, I can't say that I have I Only drink them out and now you can

And that's when we bring in our carton and we hand everybody one and we give Damon a black Russian. Yeah, yeah. Chocolate milk. And we give a little chocolate milk to Damon. We made this special for you, Damon. We did a double dozen Kaluah for you. Damon, we didn't really know how to go about making yours. We heard your people are lactose intolerant. I don't know if that's a real thing or not. I think he has been out on products because he's lactose intolerant before. I'm almost

positive Damon's lactose intolerant. Damon, full transparency here. We've just never seen a black guy drink a white rice here. And for that reason I'm out. We're going to opt out of working with you. For that reason we're out. Can we go earmuffs for the rest of this? We don't want to make this all the way back. Damon, we got you a Nintendo Switch that you can play with for the rest of the pitch.

I think the white, and we'll have to make a lactose intolerant version, of course. Well, if it's powdered milk, it could all be like Damon could be like while I'm lactose intolerant And then we could be like well above up. This isn't actual milk. This is an actual this is powder This is dandruff. This is dandruff How about what is powdered milk made out of do they like boil down regular milk? Harden it and then chip it away? That's a good question. Something like that, I would think so. Or is it made of like oil?

I don't know, but I think the thing is people are going to be expecting it to be a carton of milk, but it's not. Yeah, you can kind of shake it. Cartons are actually a lot lighter than you, you don't even know you have it on you. Maybe we build them and they have like a belt loop So you can go to the bar with it? Yeah, you have a bunch of them, but obviously it's too awkward to like carry in your pocket That's why we have the belt loop you have a bunch of lining Trapping onto your belt you just slap it down in front of the bartender and they could pour the kalua

Yeah, just charge me for the shot and the kalua That's straightforward and easy. Yeah That's what the people want something to consider dude. I think this shit is fucking I think it's gonna make us money and I think everybody else has products I think I'm gonna get our souls get a good night bean It's not like bar stools sell a Stella blue like bar still doesn't have the name in front of it Could just be white Russian mix Yeah, Owens trend, but we got to be willing to take a big loss off the jump

That's the problem is who's gonna get behind this we need an investor and Dave just lost 10 to 15 percent Yeah, Dave just lost 7 mil. So clearly that's out We're gonna need to source all of our products from within America. Yeah, we need American milk We need to get our own cows dairy farmers What if the twist is because we could lean in The easiest option here is to lean right, right? Obviously, yeah. Well, I don't even anti-white Russian. I think that's who we are Yeah

Really right. So maybe Yeah, it's all American made it has to be to be American-made. Oh, 10% of our profits go to... Wounded Warriors. Wounded Warriors. Like, we'll be the Black Rifle coffee... We'll be the Black Rifle of the White Russian mix. ...of White Russian powdered White Russian mix. White Rifle.

White Rifle. White... ...Rifle... ...Russian... ...coffee... ...mix. Oh, what if it's instead of like Russian, since that's probably like a naughty word. It's like white American

I'm gonna have a white American. We'll have a white American. Yeah Yeah, that makes it seem proud a white white American mix but also mix kind of has a connotation that yeah No, get rid of the mix thing. Yeah, white American just white American pure. How about pure white American? Essentials needed to make a white Russian. I Think we got to take Russian out of it. But do we take the move? That's gonna be in very small font You'll barely even know it comes right?

Well, what's like is there a more correct term to use because like didn't they aren't they going away from car bombs but that's offensive what a Blanco Ruski a Blanco Ruski is nice that could be that could play white American white American car bombs now cuz you're not supposed to call them car bombs anymore I don't know man I don't know cuz. I don't know. Because it's offensive to the people of Ireland. Yes. Because most of their relatives died in car bombs.

Right. With their tanks and their bombs. And their bombs and their cars. Wasn't that uh, wasn't she pro IRA? I think all the people of Ireland are pro IRA. No. I think some of them are. That's not, well yes, some, but that was the whole point.

It was a war. Yeah. Up the raw. Yeah. Brother, you're talking to someone who knows what he's talking about here. You just said all of Ireland was pro IRA. And then I said, well well some of them were because I

stepped in the raw I was gonna say that regardless uh-huh with their tanks and their bombs and their bombs that's a book you'd know no she's anti-ra because she's criticizing the raw for their tanks and their bombs and their guns say nothing is the name of that book it's really good really tell the story of the troubles what's in your head I think we really gotta get moving on this white Russian Blankow Rewski. You guys don't have to be involved what are you talking about I just brought it up. You don't see that

you don't seem like you want to be involved we can give you like a revenue share you know what would be kind of cool, right? Is if we like, if we kind of just did like a, you know when sometimes the, to just make it more familiar and kind of folksy a little bit to like the audience that we're trying to reach is that since we're going to make it a powdered milk, right? We could do something like, you know,

you know how you can put an apostrophe in the middle of a word to get rid of a letter yeah so we could do like a pure white power oh but take out the POW apostrophe er yeah no mix no mix but that's how we get pure what. What is another word for mix? Combos nice Pure white power Pure white power combo pure white Power you like some stores might be hesitant to get this up on the shelves. Why oh, that's why we're selling direct-to-consumer I'm not worried about brick and mortar. We just set like there's no reason you're wasting your time

I'm expecting us going on like a tour Like, you know like Burton Tom or like the Nelk boys. I think it's more Charlie Kirk We're at bars we go to college hunting lodges Elks clubs veterans club we go to college and debate Students. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's kind of the vibe. Yeah, and then we and we hand out the drinks beforehand Yeah, we have everybody people loose Yeah, so that if anyone protests the people who have enjoyed the drink and beat the shit out of that. Yeah But I think we do need to be like showing face

Like we got to do a pop-up at like in like Hoboken and we're behind the bar You don't think we could kind of like fashion some kind of fun and we're behind the bar. You don't think we could kind of like fashion some kind of fun, folksy thing to wear over our heads in like almost like the shape of a milk carton, but a little flowier? Yeah, couldn't be too rigid because that would be uncomfortable. And also to make sure that the people that know that we're like

truly supporting the farmers, we could ride in on horses. Yeah. Yes. On fire. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's gonna be a lot of fire involved. And it would be like very secular secular like not like church involved at all Like we'd be like anti like we could be like anti church. I like obviously like burn a cross or something

Yeah, everybody's welcome Everybody's unless you're lactose intolerant We're intolerant of the lactose and we're intolerant of lactose of the lactose community. Yeah. Yeah, I Think this is fucking genius. I think that Cubans gonna come to us I'm gonna talk to my agent and get the get the tour figured out. I'm gonna talk to your business manager We're gonna be doing we're gonna go to like all the SEC schools. Oh, absolutely We're not even gonna be like not even SEC.

Like Liberty University. We're going to Georgia Southern. There will never be a lactose SAE. There will never be a lactose SAE. That's great. That'll be our jingle. So fucking good. Kids these days just don't know how to make white powers like they used Hold the phone what was that We're going away from the traditional name known as white Russian To be honest we don't like the Russians. Yeah, that's right. It's like freedom fries right after September 11th Yeah, we don't like the rushes freedom fries, but we'd also like to add that when it comes to Russia versus Ukraine I don't see why that's our problem

It was hilarious after 9-eleven when we were like attacked by a dude from like Afghanistan that were like fuck the French For not joining yeah, fuck the French Yeah not joining. Yeah, fuck the French Yeah, we did that with a lot of people We did that with the with the Japanese after Pearl Harbor But that was like a Japanese conflict like they attacked us the French didn't yeah Yeah, but we were like picked out somebody else to be like Xenophobic up. Yeah, we were taking it out on the Japanese Americans though. Oh, of course You're in turn an intern

Which is which is insane to do? To be like you had to have known Dude, I've lived in America my entire life. You knew it was coming though. You could feel it. I Just like the Dodgers I'm literally a baseball fan. I like Shohei Otani. Yeah, I just like Hideo Nomo. Dude, I was at a restaurant this weekend and somebody hit me with my fucking,

one of my top five pet peeves of all time. It's infuriating. Ordered a meal with my wife. We're eating the food and as the other people are ordering, they're just, I fucking our food. And I swear to God that I would rather have somebody jam their fucking arm, elbow deep into my dish than fucking stare at my dish really that doesn't bother me at all bothers me i actually kind of like that you don't think that they're inspired by what you've ordered they might have been but they just were it's like a new york table where they're closer than you and i are yeah right yeah fucking staring at it and they just can't stop staring did they get what you ordered yes see i almost think it would have been more insulting if they'd been like, eh, we don't want anything that's on that table. I love that. Or like, have you ever been in like,

like what you're saying? I'm agreeing with you. Yeah. You like when people look at you. Oh, I love you ever get a bug. You get a burger and the person next to you is wow. The burger looks good. I get it. If they glance at it, these women were having a conversation with their heads tilted towards us for like five to ten minutes about the food Were they talking about the food? Yes, and they couldn't decide in typical woman fashion They were like so indecisive like should we get the omelet? We'll split the pancake and they just were fucking staring at it. It felt so violent. You went to a breakfast for dinner place I didn't say it was dinner

Yeah, you did You literally said I went to dinner this weekend That might have been his earlier story Exposed yourself you're out of the white Russian business. So where did you go? You can't it's my idea. No, it's not Are you talking about I already had no I own 100% of the company as of this moment I own all of the company. Yes now it's an arm trace Yeah, how to can get to the moon first dude when I went to my business manager's office to get my will together a couple weeks ago The shares were involved

Brother I already have this and you're written out of my will Because you're that you have no shares of white right weren't getting any you weren't getting any of my will either because I thought You had all the percent of Francis white power If anything happens to me god forbid it goes to now Francis is not getting more than we're getting from white guys I'll be honest with you. I have a lot of white power myself But I could always use a little more. I think we're technically all getting 33.3. I'm fine. I can live with that I can live with that and also for what it's worth hairball Don't have your fucking business manager write your will why I don't think that's gonna hold up in court

That's like asking your you know personal trainer To my will it was my will it was my I don't remember what it was Some shit where I had to leave people money Who gets your retirement accounts and assets and things like that? Yeah, that's your will. That's your will. What are you talking about? He did it.

He wrote it. He wrote it? Yeah. I, Harry's business manager. Dear family, dear to who this may concern. Upon the death of my client, Harith Ball. Harith Ball. We will be taking our typical 30%.

He bequeaths his 33% of white power to me. Bro, you guys are divvying up shares of white power. No, I know your business manager's taking all of white power as soon as you die. He's not involved in white power. Not yet. He'll take 5%. As soon as he listens to this podcast,

clips his 20% of our ad revenue, he's going to say, I want a piece of that equity as well. You should do something fun with your will and make like a bunch of like videos or like a scavenger hunt or some shit like that. That would be fun. Fenn's Treasure. Pop up afterwards. Write a poem and bury, you know, your Xbox and PlayStation controllers out in the woods

somewhere. Like the town. near a fishing hole yeah Yeah, they did a documentary about the fence treasure. I started watching it then 20 minutes in I said what am I doing here? About what why am I watching this about talking about every true crime? Some of them are good the Karen Reed one really captured me Yeah, looked it up. It doesn't have good reviews.

Don't listen to reviews. You're not a reviews guy? Every DM I got from anyone who watched that said what a great recommendation. Really? Fantastic. Alright, I'll watch it. It also helps if you don't know anything about the case. I don't know anything about the case.

There you go. I think you're going to enjoy it. My sister knows everything about it. Okay, well. Well, we're Boston. We're from Boston. Yeah. Fenn's Treasure. you know about Fenn's

Treasure, right? Not at all. That's the old man who thought he was gonna die so he had five, three million dollars of his like gold and jewels in a chest and he hid it in the woods in New New Mexico. And someone found it? Well, he wrote a poem in a book and he gave people clues about where it was. And this spawned a gigantic treasure hunt. People would come, people I think got injured going and hiking in to find it.

That is a good way to get a little like make it about you after you die. Yeah. Someone, but he didn't, first of all, he didn't die. He got healthy and someone did find it. He didn't find it after he died, after he didn't die. He didn't go. He didn't first of all he didn't die. He got healthy and someone did find it He didn't find it after he died after he didn't die. He didn't go look in look He knew where it was he planted it there. Don't you think like well, I'm not gonna die He's right. I do that back. No, I should probably get that three mil from the woods. Give me that back. He Left it out there

Because he enjoyed the chase. He had a sense of adventure. Yeah people went someone found it and they returned it to him. I Don't know what they did with it. He should have made it a Netflix show Then he would have been goaded hosted by LaWan. Can you imagine? For three million LaWan show they get two hundred fifty thousand damn, huh? I mean show Is it out yet yeah I mean that's the same what was surviving bar school 250,000 and what's the traders 250,000 all these shows were 250,000 what happened to the million dollar show yeah well there's too many of the shows, so it's getting diluted

fucking bullshit What's survivors prize a million million except for on the 40th season it was 2 million You'd think that they would raise that I know it doesn't hold the same weight that it did in like fucking 98 when it first came out or whatever guys my my Spending is solved I solved it When it first came out or whatever guys my my spending is Solved I solved it What'd you do? I have been on the cards Believably abstinence. I found three million dollars in the I'm really crushing it. You've been abstinence. Yeah, we never heard that you do. What was the strat? Um, I got very scared about what's happening with the economy.

And so I just said, all right, dial it in. I used fear. So for example, last night I got home pretty late because of my flight. I was hoping to go to Whole Foods or Trader Joe's, get some groceries, but I didn't have time for that. So I went on Uber Eats and I went to my typical go-to Seamours and I was going to do the Brussels sprouts, shaved Brussels sprouts salad with Icelandic salmon as well as the lobster mac and che Right with fees and delivery and tip it was gonna be like 84 bucks

And I said not today not today not in tariff just get your America So I went to spring bone and got a cup of broth and drank that for dinner. That's insane. $14 plus including delivery. Have you gotten such better food for $14? Well, why do you think I look starving today? You do look a little hungry. You look a little lighter on your feet. I drank my dinner last night. I drank dinner last night I drank dinner that's great I can't imagine I can't I can't do the whole like drinking your meals thing they had the they have those KFC radios got all those Huel drinks

they're delicious I drank one slammed it I was hungry though still hungry after mmm but I got all my nutrients in which was good Bone broth is nice because there is some protein in there. Yeah, broth is extremely healthy. It's good. I love bone me and Dana Do those yeah white? Dana whites big into the bone broth. I thought you meant beers. No, no white. I still thought you meant white broth That's why I said white after I was like, is there a whole line of white stuff that we could start Here I thought you meant our white friend Dana beers, and I was gonna correct you and say he's actually Egyptian Did you know that I didn't know racist

His last name is Barawi Albin Laden. How does this time is beers? Did you see his bachelor party this week it was yeah He texted me because I DMed him after he showed all those jerseys and I said, this looks awesome. And he goes, I'm in shambles right now. He's also been to three bachelor parties in the last four weekends or something. Jesus Christ. And so every time, and he's expected to just go nuts at each one. Yeah, he's the guy.

That's his cross to bear. He's sort of the Grace O'Malley of bachelor parties. Yeah each one. Yeah, he's so that's his cross to bear. He's sort of the grace. O'Malley of bachelor parties Yeah, so he you know it to fall Yep Hide it on and Every time he comes home he can barely like keep his eyes open. Yeah, I'm sure it's just a mess Sounds like hell this is leading up to his what four weeks in a row of bachelor parties And he literally ozempic just started working on me. Oh yeah, not anymore.

It's like the dude Adam Richman from Man vs. Food, where he just had to go and do eating competitions every week for his TV show, and then he got massively depressed because of what he was doing to his body. If Dana's not depressed right now, part of his brain's not working. Well, Dana stopped drinking for a while, didn't he?

Was that in preparation of this stretch? God no, what? Wasn't he doing an I drink a beer every day until like, stone cold Steve Austin looks at me? Yeah, he took a couple weeks off. He made it a couple weeks. I don't know how, exactly how long, but it wasn't that long. Tommy asked me if I had any jerseys that he could wear for that.

Bro, how about your mere Gibbs changing his number? I know. How pissed are you? I don't give a fuck. It's a throwback now. It's a throwback. It actually makes it more valuable because it's rare. Yeah. I offered up Mac Jones.

He said I need a weird jersey for this weekend and I said do you want my Mac Jones Patriots? And he refused. He said no. He's a Giants guy. Yeah. He should have worn a Barawi Albin Laden jersey. Patriots and he refused he said no He's a giant guy. Yeah He should have worn a burawi albin lot in Jersey But like what do you want like what do you want from me at that point?

If I'm giving you Mac Mac Jones is a good Jersey to wear out He just wanted to start a conversation about how he was invited to the bachelor party You weren't you were talking about it for like three. How are you invited? I was invited Couldn't make it I was about to say Because of the foreplay thing My best Jersey I Have the red authentic Michaelvik Jersey from when he played on the Falcons

That's sick game one. I had to mow lawns for weeks to buy that thing That's sick mode everyone's lawn in the neighborhood How much were you charging for a mo? Probably like eight dollars. I was charging like 25. Yeah, well mean Those lawns are probably massive. Yeah true. Are you pushing pushing? Oh my god for eight dollars an hour. I mean it You're alone. Yeah, I don't remember how much I charged was probably like 15 I Was pretty sure I was 25 so I've said this before but I had to feed our neighbors cats

While she was away. I fed them for a week breakfast. I think and dinner went over twice a day She gave me six bucks. Oh, yeah, you said that That's tough six one dollar bills. She tried to pay you in hair, right? She gave you an envelope of hair, right? I died to feed my neighbors. I Had to feed my neighbor's cat one time and I remember I went over and there was like It was like they they'd been gone for like multiple days already And then I went over to feed their cat and there was like shit everywhere Yeah, like bacon like a like a pot with just bacon grease in it just on the stove still and I was like this is nasty You learn a lot about people. Yeah feed their cat which I leave I live the exact same way now

So what their underwear smells like yeah, you got up in their shit You learn how their bras feel you ever get up in someone's you ever get up in someone's shit Well, you were mowing their lawn like they weren't home take a little take a little tour No, I definitely did I Definitely took a tour. I Was always self-conscious that there would be hidden video cameras. Same. I used to think my parents had hidden video cameras like in my study area when I was a kid. I would like duck underwear. I

thought they were like I was in Mission Impossible. We had a we had a dude that we used to do landscaping for a lot. And we would get paid decent. But some of the jobs were fucked. And there was yet a guest house that we would get paid decent but some of the jobs were fucked and There was he had a guest house that we would like use the bathroom and one time he was like we're going out He's like we're going out of town today So like we won't see you guys before you leave and we went in the guest house I went in the guest house to go to the bathroom and there was there a ton of alcohol in there and we were taking shots and then we got back to work and

Then it was not a good idea because then we were all just working in the Sun shit face drunk Yeah, it was like a tea. We were taking like Bombay shots It's having some gin in the middle of the day Keith Moulton used to come and Help with stuff because we need I needed help on our property Yeah, and we had to stain the the deck Like the the wood and waterproof it and it was you know along it wasn't the deck It was the walkway out to the water. It was really long. A lot of steps. Like a dock.

Well, the dock was at the end. Yeah. And then this was just like the walkway out there. Yeah. But there were, I don't know, hundreds of slats that we had to stain. And we're just sitting down. And at lunch, we came in to take a break and my parents were up working somewhere else. And I think I gave them a sandwich or something. We ate sandwiches and I think I gave him a sandwich or something we ate sandwiches and I was like you want a beer like here have a beer we were I don't know 16 yeah and we drank like half of it each we were just like I don't really

want this yeah yeah and we both you know drank Yeah, and we'd be like go party go to parties and stuff Yeah, but like we were like we have to go back out. Yeah. Yeah, it doesn't pair with our backs bent Yeah, staining the deck now No, yeah drinking. I was like what we're not you know, we're not Ben Affleck yeah To be honest man, it looks like we only got like 40 minutes left on this job, so I don't think I need to be wasted for that. We definitely did that multiple times, like bring a beer, and then we were like, why,

this is awful. Let's just finish this fucking job. It sounds good. Dude, I showed up to a job. I remember one time when I was going into going into call it must have been a senior going into college You know is the summer and we were doing we were still doing like odd jobs And I remember we showed up and there was a pile It was me and one other kid and I was like this person said they were gonna pay us like a couple hundred bucks to

Do this job and he was like, yeah, I'm down and we showed up and it was just a like a mountain of cinder blocks, like I'm like 300 cinder blocks, if not more. And pretty much they were just like, can you just move these to there? And it was the most like tedious, exhausting. That's how I fucked up my the tendon in my arm. Because we were just carrying cinder blocks like this all day Yeah, and eventually you're like dude. I can't carry anymore

And my tendon exploded in my arm Cuz I had to keep carrying them. Yeah. Yeah, but we didn't that we ended up get paid a lot You think we got paid like 200 bucks each. That's a big payday at that age. How far did you have to move them? Probably like 30 feet Maybe more maybe like 50 feet. All right. I hate to do it. I have to jump All gee, I think we're good, right? Yeah, we're good See you guys on Thursday awesome

Perfect day. Awesome. Perfect. I'm going to be in Edmonton, Hoboken, and Philadelphia coming up. All those tickets are available at harrisettowebsite.com. I guess I'll be in Providence tomorrow, or no, sorry, on Friday of this week, but I think the Friday Late Show is the only one that has any tickets left, if any at all. So then Westniac in New York in a couple of weeks, Kansas City right after that, then Dallas and then Chicago to close out the spring. Or all five of these heads. PunchUp.live, PunchUp.live,

five Francis Ellis for tickets. Close was over, till you came around. I was only falling one way. I was only falling one way Days were drifting Fall, fall as I So, so then you listen Now I come alive I was only falling my way

I was only falling my way I was only falling my way I was only falling one way I was only falling one way Fetish drew your eye Did you realize No one can take me alive I was only falling one way See it just a distant light, feel it fast forever bright Call it just a memory, take my hand and you can see I'm Oh Man is When I'm gone

Vanished to your earth Did you realize No one could take me alive Be alive