Spiritually Speaking with Jessica & Samantha - Cycle Wisdom: Periods & Personal Power

Episode Date: September 27, 2024

In this episode, Jess and Samantha dive into the often taboo topic of periods, sharing their personal experiences and journeys. Jess opens up about her diagnosis with endometriosis at 21, discussing how it led her to track her cycle and align with the moon’s phases for healing and balance. Samantha shares her own insights, and together they explore the sacredness of menstruation, breaking down the stigma and empowering listeners to embrace their own cycles with awareness and compassion. They aim to voice the realities many of us are afraid to talk about, creating space for healing, connection, and empowerment.

hello and welcome back to spiritually speaking with me sam and with me jess welcome back yes welcome back i'm sorry if i sound a little bit um under the weather on this recording um but that's because i am because you are babes you're burning the candle at both ends aren't you my girl yeah exactly that exactly that, exactly that. I actually spent, yesterday, I actually spent the day in bed, which, like, obviously I never do. And it was so nice because because I was ill, I actually didn't feel bad for it.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Normally I could never do that because I just feel so guilty. But I actually, yeah, like just enjoyed it, yeah. I love a little bit of like laying in bed and chilling. I find day to day, like I can't get in the duvet. Oh, you lay on top? Yeah.

That's funny. So like for me, I will lay on my bed and I'll have my blanket, but I can't get in it and I could lay there and I don't feel guilty but if I get in the duvet that's such a commitment and that means I'm either poorly or like just a bit sad like I'm in like a low mood a bit sad like you know and it's like but I I like chilling on my bed um yeah, can't commit to the duvet. It's too much. I think it's because my brain and body's like,

ooh, bedtime. And I can sleep at any point in the day. So then it's just not good. See, yesterday I really wanted to sleep in the morning because, so the girls have just been up at the moment, like through the night, like just little cries, but just consistently through the night. And obviously that means a lot of broken sleep and um I think they've got a little bit this cold and um when my nanny got here in the morning I was she was like oh go back to bed and I was like yeah you know what I actually think I will because I really did feel rough I can't go

back to sleep yeah once I'm awake I'm like my brain's just like and I can't yeah I think it depends for me like sometimes if I sort of get up like and start being alert then it's hard but and then I can have like a sort of full sleep about like 8am like wake up at 6 chill for a bit and then like 8am fall asleep again for like 45 minutes. My god, why? The child free life babes, you know. Yeah it is. I also napped a lot on the weekend because I was at like this really chilled like random coastal town from like two hours from Kuala Lumpur there was nothing there so I was just reading and then I did actually get into bed I didn't commit to the duvet it was an on top of

the duvet nap and I did that Saturday and Sunday and it was lovely oh nice yeah I'm sorry Sam that's all right I'll be there one day I was gonna say and then when yours are older and I've got my ones you'll be like oh well she'll yeah my sisters always say that to me like especially my own and she's like mine are gonna be older and you're just gonna have these new bones I'm like well that's what having sisters is for you can help me yeah exactly exactly oh but how you do because obviously there's been so much with the salon so like and I don't know what's been going on so give me a little update yeah it's um the last so there's big changes now like the salon so the current shop is um when I say current I mean like the one that I've always had um looks completely different now um which is really good so we

closed that on Wednesday last week I think it was on Saturday and a lot happened which was good um so that does look really different but the one the new one next door isn't finished yet so you're still just going into the current shop but it means that we don't have a reception desk anymore so like they're working on reception now like from a hair station which is obviously a bit difficult just looks a little bit mishmash at the moment but a lot of people don't even realize which is really weird and I'm like oh my god no it's absolutely not gonna look like this when it's finished um but on Saturday so they've done loads of work Saturday day and then he rang me the contractor at like five o'clock and he was like you need to come here so I just thought oh for goodness sake right okay so anyway I get there and leave the

girls with Andy to bath and bed them as well which I think I had to do this week before even as well I think anyway yeah I think I did and um I get there and it was like oh no sorry sorry that was last week that was the week before this week I'd put them to bed and then I had to go so I'd gone at like half six or something and I get there and there's no door on one of the shops right there's no door bear in mind as well oh and then sorry on my current shop there's a new door but the new door hasn't got locks on it right it's not ideal is it so no and the locks on the door come out of the glass I don't know it's hard to explain it's not like a door like a lock you know like your front door would lock it's a lock at the top and a lock at the bottom. So this lock gets put in and when the lock isn't there,

it's just an open glass hole. Now, security is not my main worry in Dubai because it's an extremely safe place. I can leave that salon open overnight and nine times out of ten, it would be fine. I wouldn't do that, obviously. But what I mean is I wouldn't probably lose sleep over that. However, what is my worry is how't probably lose sleep over that yeah however what

is my worry is how hot it is oh yeah because of the heat outside getting into the building is a nightmare for me because my AC can't battle with that heat because it's so hot because even overnight it's still like 35 degrees probably yeah um humidity everything like so that coming in is what the worry is because then when the clients come in in the morning it's going to be hot already and yeah it's just a nightmare because then as it heats up through the day you've just got no chance of it ever cooling down so i'm like they're trying to figure out what we're going to do about that we've boarded up the one that hasn't got a door um because basically the hinges had broke in this time they were um putting it on and then obviously they can't put it on then the hair stations aren't

finished and security's there like arguing with us like they need to leave they need to leave they can't work at this time um people are complaining in apartments above. And I was like, mate, don't try and kid a kid there. There are no apartments above this salon. It's a swimming pool. And he looked at me and I was like, you know what I mean? And also it really annoys me because I could be in there doing hair till nine o'clock at night on a Saturday and there's no issue. But if they're in there painting, there's an issue.

And it's like like what's the difference yeah it's so frustrating like there's just so much red tape um involved which is just so frustrating so how do all of that in general security like you just go do you just give him a bit of cash oh i tried that it wouldn't take it oh yes I wouldn't take it I ended up ringing his boss yeah to get us like allowed for like another 30 minutes to just finish what we needed to do um I get it I get it like they have a job to do and also I think for them especially in Dubai like if they lose their job it's like oh god yeah like I don't want that no but it's kind of like let's look at the bigger picture here yeah someone is painting the wall are they making noise no are they

disturbing anyone no yeah are the blinds down no one can even see in yes so what's the issue yeah like it's just so so frustrating and when especially when you're like battling against like a clock you it's yeah it's just annoying you know what you need to do is an ampha sorry you do right I know my security guard used to be a pain in the arse when I was in Dubai Hills but he was incredibly efficient I had to give him a bit of cash to make my life a bit easier but sometimes when people are just making your day difficult and then you're frustrated with them you've just got to send them love and light I know I know I thought everyone listening send some love and light to the security guard at the yeah to this guy greenhouse to Yusuf um but yeah so then so that was Saturday night Sunday morning I got back to the salon for

7am to then clean it to blitz it before the clients came in at 10 the girls arrived and helped me um and then it was just like intense in terms of like trying to clean it and get it ready for when the clients came and I'm very conscious that like we have so many new clients at the moment like there's a surge of new clients because obviously so many people just moved to Dubai with it being September and teachers and schools and that time of year um like so far this month bear in mind it's the 25th today so we've still got another five days um we've had 65 new clients that is bloody incredible babes yeah it's amazing that isn't it yeah in 25 days 65 new clients and we obviously have a lot of returning clients normally so to get that many new on top of that was incredible but then in my head head, I'm like, all these new clients,

the first impression is so important. And they're coming in and obviously we're doing building work and whatever else. But anyway, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine. I just keep trying to tell myself everything's fine. Also, you can send them a little message like the new client.

I do do that. Like, I don't get it. They get it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, they do get it. Most of them don't even realize anyway. Sorry. Then to add to this, on Monday when I'm in the salon,

I think it was Monday, and I'm stressed and everything else, what happens? Municipality come in. Tell people who they are if they don't know who these people are. If you imagine any job that you do an inspector coming in so offset for schools khda for schools is what municipality are and you but the difference is you never know they're going to come so they just walk in and as soon as they walk in you your stomach falls to the floor because you could have done everything right but they make you feel like

you've done everything wrong and they're not kind they're not smiley they're not nice people i'll be really honest very rarely have i had a nice one um and they honestly just make you feel horrendous it's the worst experience um and i saw her come in and as soon as i saw her i thought she's going to be municipality and the last thing i need right now is that when i'm in the middle of doing a bloody renovation yeah so then what happens is they go through the salon basically with a fine-toothed comb you almost have to stop what you're doing they go through it with a fine-toothed comb and they will fine you on anything so i'm talking not one hair in a hairbrush is allowed oh for goodness sake god they'd be screaming for my hairbrush yeah that is like to the level of what of how strict it is and every single thing that's been opened has to have a date on it

so every tube of color has to have a date on it every can of hairspray has to have a date on it every bit of hand soap like you name it it's got to have a date on it like it's so meticulous and yeah that that on top of it I honestly thought this is going to send me into an early grave oh babes so yeah that's how my week's been that sounds really really intense yeah no wonder you was in bed all day yeah and I just think that like I've been saying a few times on here anyway I know now that for the time being I can't be doing hair as well and it is what it is I'm just not going to take any more appointments what I already have booked in and then we'll just go from there and then I'll say maybe I'll do hair again in a month's time but for right now I can't do any more than what I'm already doing because yeah 100% like my capacity is overflown that's

fine and I think that's good good boundaries there babes because it's a lot you're yeah a lot with business motherhood life so well done give yourself a bit of credit light is at the end of the tunnel and yeah I don't know what else to say yeah it's a lot yeah yeah it is yeah exactly light is at the end of the tunnel like we're really not that far away now um so yeah it's it is what it is it's just one of them I actually weirdly haven't actually cried over this I thought one day I was like I'm gonna cry now like this is gonna be my time like I'm so ready to cry over this and then I just didn't um but I think I'm just a bit like there you're probably slightly in survival mode as well and I think this happens to a bit light there. You're probably slightly in survival mode as well.

And I think this happens to a lot of us. And like yesterday with your body, like obviously needing that, your body's probably like, oh my fucking God. And your mind is saying, just stop, stop talking to me right now. And we do this a lot as humans.

We tell our body to stop communicating with us so we can just get on with it. You know, I haven't got time for this. And then more than likely there'll be a little bit of a burnout coming up in the next couple of weeks and make time for it. Like I would post launch that, you know, listen to what your body needs and allow yourself some downtime and maybe do it a bit gradual so that it's not a shock. And just sort of, so that it's not yeah and just sort of yeah it's okay it's just yeah you got this you're doing a really good job really really good yeah managing it really well like it's very inspiring to watch you manage all of this while juggling babies and everything else oh thanks well done so what's your thoughts so my love you're in Chiang Mai now I'm back in Chiang Mai um and I'm happy I like being here

um and I've come on my period today well last night so I'm a little bit um lethargic I don't know I just feel a bit like not sad I'm not like but just you know it's like day one it's just a bit harder yeah it's weird this I find this really weird because I feel like I'm so not in tune with my body at all when it comes to stuff like that yeah so I couldn't even tell you what that feels like on the first day of your period because it's like say whenever I'd come on I'd just be like okay yeah that's happened I don't then take a minute to think oh that's how I feel and that relates to that yeah I mean yeah no definitely like I just like I'm quite in tune with my cycles and like the main reason for that is because I was like diagnosed with endometriosis when I was about 21.

So I feel like I've really like been so observant to like how my body works because I kind of it's important for fertility further down the line. So like I do know when I'm going to come on usually and And like, I could feel it a good few hours before. But you were saying you don't always know, do you? I have no idea, no. But again, I think that's maybe I do get warning signs. Complete surprise. I'll probably have warning signs, but I just don't listen. I don't pay attention to it.

Do you get period pain or anything? Yes, once I'm on. So it's sort of, see, I always feel like like like I feel as though like I can feel the shedding of my womb happening and it's like I'm like okay something's something's moving and then I know in hours like to be ready like definitely that um and like I can feel I sometimes find my ovulation can have a similar feeling mid-month oh okay yeah that is quite normal actually because then I never knew what ovulation felt like because I wasn't ovulating and then when I was doing all my medication and everything and then yeah right before I had girls I remember texting my doctor like I have stabbing

pains in my stomach and he was like you're ovulating and I was like yeah so like I will I find that in between obviously I I remember realizing that I think probably a couple of years because I had surgery for my endometriosis they like yeah yeah yeah I had to so I suffered really badly with period pains from like a really young age I came on my period when I was 11 um it's quite young I was it's normal I think it's normal now for it to yeah happen around that age but I think when we were that age that would have been quite young yeah so like I was like my first week of senior school, but I was like, I was over the moon because I had big sisters and like my dad like made a big thing of it. And he gave me like, he gave me a hundred pound

and was like, you're a woman. And like, yeah, it was like this whole celebration. I loved it. That is amazing. I know. Oh my God, that's so lovely. I can remember when I came on, I remember coming out, I was like 14 when I started I came on I remember coming out I was like 14

when I started my period I mean and um I was at my friend's house and I remember being like what the fuck is this and then anyway obviously I'd gone home and told my mum my mum was over the moon she was so like excited for me and she definitely made it like not scary and like yeah which was really nice but that is so cute that he celebrated it he did the same for my sister's like I know bless him he's made for daughters but like I remember like calling my sisters because I was like oh my god like it felt like such a big deal like I was so happy um and then obviously like they were fine I realized that it had to happen every month. And I was like, no, take it back. Yeah.

And then I'd say probably around 13, 14. So I think like maybe year nine, year 10 at school, I started to really feel like my symptoms quite severely. And it was always sort of day one that like it would be so painful. And I'd like, I'd be sick from the pain like I literally would throw up yeah happened a couple times um and obviously when you're that age you're not as aware of like you know like if I could feel my period coming on I know that movement's good for me I know a bath's good for me like I would probably take a paracetamol if it felt bad you know but at that age you're not you're not aware and obviously I thought it was normal

to have such like severe symptoms that's also half the issue I think for a lot of people with an endometriosis because you go to a doctor like yeah it's supposed to be painful yeah and it's like no no it's not supposed to be that painful yeah exactly so like it was like it was quite tough and then it was actually it's like I carried on sort of accepting it and then it was only when I was about 20 or maybe 21 I was working in my corporate job and I had private health. So I was like, oh, fuck it. I kept going to the GP. The GP was like, meh, whatever. And I actually remember like this gynecologist when I went private, she was really sweet.

And she was just like, do you know what? Like, yeah, get your symptoms. But the only way we can diagnose is through like laparoscopy surgery. She was like, but I really trust your intuition that you feel that something's wrong that's so nice yeah and she went so we're gonna do it and yeah I did have it and obviously I still they clean it up like that's what they do like they go in and you know so like because what it is is like a spider web on the womb so that's why there's fertility issues because what happens is that

when the sperm and egg come together and they come down to the wound, they can't then attach to the lining because the lining has like this sort of spider web that builds up. So that's kind of what it is. And obviously it can go into other organs. And, you know, it's actually very common. And I think that it's just more that you can get it diagnosed now. But that's why it brings, I don't know, these sort of increased stuff.

Anyway, that was when I was younger. And then after surgery, I was better for a few years. They told me to go on the pill, which I didn't because I really don't believe in the pill. Like, I just feel like it blows my mind that we like take medication that stops something so natural like I could yeah it's like when they used to do like electric chair shocks when people were gay to like stop them being gay you know like shit like I didn't know that happened like in the Victorian times in the asylums like they just it's just I honestly think in like 100 years time they'll look back at the medication that we took like the pill and be like oh my god like yeah what were they thinking you know so anyway anyway so I've

not really been a taker of the pill um but I was mindful that every time I bleed it can then add to the symptoms so I started having acupuncture every month and it changed my life wow yeah and anyone that's in the Essex area um who suffers with endometriosis I can recommend an incredible acupuncture therapist she's very wise and spiritual she's like a Chinese medicine witchy guru. She's incredible. And basically we just really worked with my cycle and I worked with her for a year and I would go around ovulation time.

And that's why I think I really started to understand my cycles. And we just worked with my periods and how to release the energy and ever since then I've been like I don't suffer with the symptoms like I haven't had to take any painkillers today um I knew it was coming yeah like it's a bit discomfort and you know what I actually said last night I was like cooking dinner and I was like oh like I was like I just hate like my period like I said it out loud and then I stopped myself and I was like no I don't I'm really grateful for

my body and I'm really grateful for this period and this is like the most sacred thing that like my body can do and it's actually really um when you actually think about what a period is like it's a lot on the body and the fact that like we deal with this every month and I know we all know this but I'm just going to reiterate it like that we're expected to just like like get on with life as though nothing's happening but actually we're just shedding a load of our blood out of our body like to me I think it's outrageous that we should just be normal yeah I actually think I feel like I've been extremely naive to this for like a really long time because like I never so I was on the pill from being like I don't know 15 or 16 or something I think I had like heavy periods and um anyway got the pill and then I just continued it till after when I got married like however many years ago so I was on it for like

a long time yeah well like over 10 years probably and um when but the pill I was on I never had a period yeah which is what a lot of people's. Yeah. So I didn't know what it was like to have one or I completely forgot anyway. And then when I came off the pill, I then would only have a period for like a day or then it'd be two days and then it'd be three. And then it might go back to two and then it'd be five and it was so mishmash which obviously leads to the problems that I was having um in terms of fertility but um I didn't know any of this so when you're saying that like you know we all know like I didn't know so there might be people that are listening to this who don't because if they're on the coil or they're on certain things where they don't bleed

then you wouldn't actually really know about it so i'm just trying to look because i basically read a book about it i think it was um how the pill changes everything the there's a good book i've heard about it about um it's heard about this book it's something like I think you need to know about the pill and what I love about the way that this author um writes this book is educational and she's very much like I'm just giving you the facts and like it's not sort of it's right or wrong which obviously I'm I have an opinion but that but that's that I'm comfortable that I've got an opinion with it. But her book was more informative. But basically, like how much like it brings like depression and suppression. I don't know it blows my mind that that we take something every day that stops the most

natural empowering cycle that we have as a woman I just I don't know like I get it just never even occurred to me like that like it was something that I was just taught like you take this so you don't get pregnant yeah and I didn't want to get pregnant so I was like obviously I'm going to take it and I never even thought about other possibilities that I could go down like other routes of contraception or anything like that it was just like this is what I have to take to not get pregnant I don't want to get pregnant and then all of a sudden when I wanted to get pregnant it was like right I must fall pregnant like that now because I've stopped taking this pill and then obviously I didn't and it was only when I came off the pill and I didn't get a period straight away either yeah I think it's at least three months to get a period and all of a sudden

when talking to people I was like oh shit not everyone is on this I just assumed everyone took it and like I don't know like I've always worked with like a lot of women obviously and people would talk about the periods or whatever but I don't know I just never really paid that much attention to it and then all of a sudden I was like oh shit so many people aren't on the pill yeah and I've been on this for so long I've never even thought about what it is I'm putting in my body or you know and after I had the girls obviously they give you a little bit of a pep talk of like right now you're potentially going to be really fertile you've got to be really careful I think it's best you go back on the pill and I got it again because I thought when when my period

comes back I'll probably I'll start taking it again and I was just looking at it and I was like I just don't feel right about it anymore and I haven't actually taken it I bought it and it's there but I haven't actually taken it again um because something just doesn't feel right about it anymore like and it's not because I want more kids or it's not for that reason it's purely just because all of a sudden I'm like I don't know I don't really like what you potentially did to my body in the first place. And then I don't think that maybe I should be suppressing it. And, you know, I've got a friend who's a doctor and I've spoken to many doctors and they've said to me like how it's OK to take it. It's not got hormones and all this and the other. But there's just something in me now that is a little bit more wise to it and maybe aware of my body like you say and yeah it's I

fucking hate having a period every month like I really don't enjoy that but at the same time is it it doesn't it's not debilitating to me like I don't find it to the point where it's debilitating I just find it an inconvenience if I'm going to be completely honest. But I think the reason sorry to interrupt you that we find it so frustrating is because the world isn't made for periods yeah actually if the world was made for our cycles which would be great if it was then when we ovulate we go and have our appraisals at work I've probably mentioned this before we go and public speak and present because we are incredibly attractive and at our best. And when we're bleeding, we can go and give ourselves permission to go and hibernate.

Like I'm not really leaving my flat today, you know, that I'm in. And I'm just going to, I'm probably going to get a massage later. But like just on my feet and legs, like not on my body. And I'm going to cook a massage later but like just on my feet and legs like not on my body and I'm going to cook warm meals you know like I'm in I'm in the winter of my season right now but when I ovulate I'm in my summer I want to be out I want my skin on show I'm going to look more symmetrical I'm going to be like I will have some like like energy releasing from me that makes me more attractive you know actually if we made our life more connected to our cycle we wouldn't hate our period and it's also

like we've both said it like oh for god's sake it's just like so inconvenient and like why don't we all take a moment everyone listening whether you're on your period or you're even with the menopause even with our hormones and everything and we should be more accepting and kinder to it because the world we live in kind of doesn't give us space for that and yeah so for like the little people that are gonna go through this you know like my nieces, you know, your girls. Yeah. I want them to be so much more like comfortable that like when it's their period, they're going to feel emotional and that's okay.

You know? Yeah. And how can they be more prepared for it? Because like if we can give them more of that support. So like, I don't want to talk too much about my niece, because she might not want me to talk about it. But I think in general with teenage girls right now like you know giving them more understanding of like the fact that it is a winter energy so like it's okay if you want to be at home and it's okay like if you need like more food that's comforting and you know I know

we say like chocolate but it could just be like a really good home-cooked meal sometimes is all we need but we don't cook it you know so maybe that's why we match cook and we have it in the freezer and we're a bit more prepared for our cycle and then we get the shepherd's pie out you know like yeah it's that sort of stuff you know and I think if we teach that at a younger age and I know these things aren't like the science stuff, but it's the soulful stuff. And that's what, as women, we are like designed to work with, you know? Yeah, I think for me, the reason as well, why I feel the way I do towards it is because every time I would come on, it would mean that I wasn't pregnant. Yeah.

So I had this like negative connotation towards it that it was like that was a really like oh thing you know and like even after I'd had the girls I noticed when I'd come on after that it was very triggering for me yeah like weirdly because it was like I wasn't in a state at all like I'm still not where I want to have a baby but still when you come on it was like that brought back that memory of like that awful yeah that feeling is like coming on so I think if there might be people obviously listening to this who feel like that as well who obviously have a very negative feeling towards their periods because it means that they're not pregnant and maybe they want to be um which is also really hard um what do

you think because obviously I can't relate to that so like I think that's quite hard to bring in that positive part do you think there's like an element of having that? It's really hard. Yeah. It's really hard because there isn't, I can bring positivity to anything, I really, really can. But that feeling is really, really difficult. I would just say it's not meant to be this month. And there's a reason for that.

And like, there's a reason for everything. I really, really do believe that, you know, everything happens for a reason for that and like there's a reason for everything I really really do believe that you know everything happens for a reason everything but what I mean is um I would always be like right okay it's not meant to be this month so maybe I wasn't meant to have a baby born in October although I really wanted that for whatever reason at that time okay it's not meant to be then okay it's not meant to be then okay it's not meant to be November right it's not meant to be December maybe I'm meant to have a spring big maybe it's meant to be 2024 and not 2023 yeah you know and that's the only way that I would say that I could personally get through it is just thinking that it wasn't meant to be that month

and then obviously when it did happen for me it made so much sense because then it was meant to be February which is such an important month for Andy and I anyway that's when our wedding anniversaries are and it was three weeks after my best friend had had her birthday at baby sorry not birthday when she just had her baby and it was 11 weeks before my sister was having hers like it was it timed perfectly but I would never have known that before so I think if you are having a negative feeling around it then that's the only way personally and acupuncture again I can't stress I'm just gonna say so that would have been that would be my recommendation obviously I've not I've not been on a fertility journey but obviously I've been on my endometriosis

journey which was also really lonely and hard at times and I felt really misunderstood and I just found working with with my acupuncture therapist she was so in my cycle with me and like we were through the ups and downs together and like I remember there would be like a conversation where we giggled where I was like that was the best period ever and it was like really funny because we were like it was just seamless it just happened and it was like really lovely and then when I had a bad period I would get really upset because I was like is it back is it worse you know so I think like if you have got the resources available to you I really would explore Chinese medicine in my opinion I also think reflexology is good but I think you've got to get the right reflexologist who is more connected to like

um the cycles of the like the women the woman the woman's body um but I would say if you're on a fertility journey like working with someone maybe more of a yoga type like I say Chinese medicine who's more connected to the cycles because I feel as though you start to see the sacred element to it instead of the logical masculine science to it which is what we get consumed by which isn't what works for women you know yeah that's what I would say there gosh we went off on a tangent but that was bloody lovely I know I was thinking that I was like wow that was not meant to be the topic this week but it was actually really nice to talk about it I could talk all day about this and can I just add one more thing because I feel like I'm in my rhythm go for it um so the moon cycles with the um your menstrual cycles so I

track my cycle against the moon because that works for me because I'm always working with the moon now for some of you you might be like I don't even know when the moon's full I just look up and it's big and I think okay it must be, which is probably a lot of you and that's okay. But the moon is a 28 day cycle. On average, my cycle is 32 days. So what I tend to do is track from when the full moon was to when my bleed is. So at the moment, I'm working with like a six days after the full moon that I'm having my bleed. And obviously that the moment I'm working with like a six days after the full moon that I'm having my bleed. And obviously that's going to keep moving because my cycle is longer than the moon cycle. And that works really well for me. So like I find that instead of working with

like the day I work with the moon. So I know that I'm starting to approach the new moon with my periods, which I really like when my period aligns with that. So it's something to explore. I can delve more into it on Patreon because I feel like that might be something that's going to come up in, there's a book for the book club that I want to do with the moon and menstrual cycles, which I think would be really good. Because that's what they used a long time ago. They used the moon.

Do you make a note of like, do you use like the flow up or anything like that? I use nothing. I use just like, obviously I know what's happening with the moon. I know what's happening in the sky all the time. And I know I can, yeah, I can count from the full moon basically and just work it that way that is it's pretty simple for me um but it's taken time and I also think that's the issue with the pill I get what doctors say and I think the pill works for people that need it and I haven't got like an issue with that but I think what it does do is on a like intuitive level it stops you connecting to your body so like I feel like in my 20s I was

really aware of my cycle because I wasn't on the pill um you know I was really cautious when I was you know having sex in my 20s with like and keeping an eye on my cycle but I was able to like explore it and understand it. And I think that's another thing about the pill and probably why people do struggle after. It might not actually be to do with what the pill is doing to the body. It could just be that you don't know your body because you're having to learn it at 30 instead of learning it at 15. 100%. I think like I was never educated really on like what happens in a cycle and how you know when you ovulate how long you ovulate for what it means what can happen or yeah I just I feel like I was completely put in the shadow about it all because I just took the pill and

that was that. Yeah I think like for me when I think about the small period of time I took the pill and that was that yeah I think like for me when I think about the small period of time I took the pill I was really low like I feel like that really connected to my like heavier like emotional depression as well um and I felt like I wasn't able to like feel highs and lows I was just quite numb you know yeah and I think when I came off the pill after a few months I really started to see like my intuition you know like and I think when a lot of people speak to me and they're like how can you tell the difference between intuition anxiety I found that when I came off the pill my intuition like my feminine it like, I was given my womb permission to like, be free, you know? So yeah, I just love it, Sam. So fascinating. Yeah. Yeah, it is fascinating.

It is. And like, it's, it's nice to hear, like, I think for a lot of people to hear both our takes on it, because obviously they're so different. Yeah. it is wild but I haven't actually tracked mine since like my periods or anything because I just it still has a lot of I don't know brings a lot back for me to do that and like if I go back onto this flow app and I start tracking like right my period started on this day it lasted this long and put it in if I do that it's going to tell me when I ovulate and I just don't even want to see it on an app. But this is the issue.

It's so masculine to like go into that. So like maybe instead of tracking days, track how you feel. So like instead of it being about like this is day one and this is when I'm ovulating, like today I am bleeding for the day one I feel I feel really cozy I feel really content my tummy feels heavy like you know when your body just feels that bit more heavier and I know that I just need nurture today like and I that would be how I describe today do you ever get rage for anyone your period um probably a little bit before my period I would feel rage um if like like what I find a few days before my period is like if something goes wrong I'm less patient so my taxi drops me off at the wrong location

that could trigger me maybe a bit more obviously I'm not going to go crazy but like it could make me agitated probably more than rage so I find or like I'm clumsy before my period so like I drop things a lot more like I'm but like that's maybe what people could do like if you just write down like a feeling for like each day clumsy agitated yeah maybe you feel rage but maybe rage is like I find rage is due to suppression sometimes where actually if you just let it feel like you are it is okay to feel different all the time like throughout like I think sometimes we're we're so forced as women to be like consistent and we're absolutely not meant to be like we are the opposite of consistent like we work in a cycle even with the menopause you know people that are listening that

are going through the menopause there is also a cycle with that you know so it's it's I think it's just about feeling instead of tracking now again this isn't going to necessarily help people with well it could probably help with fertility because you're starting to listen to your body so like today I'm listening to my body like I'm wearing clothes that are comfortable you know like right now I'm wearing a bra and I can guarantee in about an hour that bra is going to be off like I don't want to wear my bra today you know so yeah it's like it's sort of like maybe just what I would sort of guide people on is just write down how you feel and see what comes up um and see where the themes are and then you can start to implement that into how you live your

life like I say then difficult conversations can happen in ovulation where you're going to be a little bit more confident you know the amount of times I had things on like my period at work I'd just cry honestly like my poor boss you know and I think like even for you Sam with your girls like you know if if there's like you know like yearly reviews and whatever just say like just don't do it on your period girls like not in like a derogatory I can never say that word that sort of thing a man would say like don't do it then like when do you feel good like is it the morning you know like like most people have points of the day where they're feeling their best put their meetings in then you know when they need to talk about themselves and reflect on their ability because we want to be

more empowered you know what I mean it's all that stuff yeah yeah yeah yeah definitely I'm yeah I think that's what comes up for me but I'm also thinking that we're probably gonna have to move this topic to next week like the one yeah I'm thinking the same thing yeah but I'm actually really glad that we've um chatted about it I feel like it was obviously spoken about today yeah definitely and I think like for people listening you know that book I'll find it because I had it on my audio I just can't find my audibles on my phone um I'll put it on my Instagram stories and I'll put it on our one as well but it's's a more, like I say, factual and informative approach to this.

I have a bias. I'm comfortable with that. You know, I'm not a doctor. I'm just a woman who connects with my body. And do you know what I'm doing next week? What? I'm going on a tantric course for five days, six days. Did I tell you?

I don't even know what that is now what is that so basically it's like I actually don't know loads about tantra but it's all about the the divine masculine and the divine feminine um and it's all about well there's a tantra gets a bad reputation it's like sex related that's why I thought it was yeah so it's and there is that and I'd heard about like I'm sure I'd seen something to do with it to do with sex but I had no idea what there's a few communities in Dubai that have it that like I just wouldn't even turn up to in my opinion because I'm just like it doesn't doesn't resonate um but the this is run by a lady which instantly made me feel like more connected to it um and it's it's yeah six days it's a lot

of like breath work and basically it's like how how you can connect to your body on an even deeper like scale now I talk really passionately about things like periods and stuff like that but I don't think I'm connected to my body like I don't think I'm conscious enough with my body for what it needs and what it wants so that's kind of what I'm wanting to explore um so there's going to be a lot of learnings that I'll share with everyone once I'm okay but it's not going to be like the monastery like I have a really nice like private room on so you go and stay there yeah it's like a retreat so it's like this isn't the yoga retreat yeah so there's yoga in the

morning and then there's like so it's like the schedule is like breakfast it's all like vegan no coffee which I've got all um yoga I know yoga and then it's like a lecture on like these topics and then it's like lunch and it's like another lecture then it's downtime and then it's like tantra exercises so you can go as couples you can go as an individual I'm going on my own I'm not I think that'd be a bit too much a few months in making him come to he was he did say he was like what does this like involve like are you going to be partnered up with like random men I was like I honestly don't think so I was like I'm going don't think so or don't know you don't even know I don't I don't know but like I don't I think so. I was like, I'm going. Don't think so or don't know.

You don't even know. I don't know. But like, I don't, I think, so I've done a Tantra course before and it was actually really great. And it was by a sex therapist and yogi in Essex. And when I went, it was loads of exercises to push you into discomfort. And what I mean by discomfort not physically like mentally so you had to sit cross-legged with the person opposite you and your knees had to touch this was a complete stranger and it was a woman so it was like you know and I had to put my hand on her chest and she had to put her

hand on my chest and we just had to stare at each other and breathe. Now, I bet loads of you... Oh, I would hate that. My sister, when I told her, I remember she was just like, this sounds really odd. I wouldn't even want to do that with you. And I love you. I know. But I would not want to do that with you. But this is the thing.

It's like, it's actually a very natural thing to do to be able to make eye contact and breathe at the same time with someone. However... You don't want to just start start laughing I was giggling the whole time this was about four years ago like I could not like I could not keep anything yeah I would be exactly the same and basically that my laughter was the absolute discomfort that I had in my body at that in that time because right I felt so uncomfortable to sit with this woman and stare in her eyes okay now I don't know what's going to happen next week but I imagine there's going to be a lot of things like that

um but what it's teaching you is like from what I can understand is that's actually a really normal thing to do now I know none of us probably think it's normal but it actually is on a human level to be able to sit and make eye contact with another human is probably the most incredible thing you can do and we all hate it you know so we will see but I think we'll have a recording before like we'll probably get one in before I head off so then it will be two podcast time that I'll share but it should be fun but yeah I might be making some weird eye contacts with people yeah good for you I mean I'm glad that you're exploring all these different things so that I don't have to.

Yeah, I think that is honestly the railway in this lifetime for me in general. And I think of everyone listening, those on Patreon, I'm happy to just go and work this stuff out because it does help. It really does. And then if you lot don't want to go I get it but I'll just share and share my learnings because that's kind of the whole point I think of why I'm here in this lifetime which is part of my purpose which is what we was meant to be talking about but we'll probably do that next week yeah so we were going to talk about purpose but we'll delve into that in our next episode won't we babes

we will indeed thank you so much for listening if you are still here and you know message us on instagram if you've resonated with things that we've talked about today um because we always like to hear feedback um and yeah find us on instagram we are at spirit speaking underscore podcast i am at her by samantha green and she is at jessica marie underscore holistic amazing babes well done well everyone enjoy your period enjoy your side and if you're a man i hope that you enjoyed this educational session