Spiritually Speaking with Jessica & Samantha - Feeling the Feels with Sam & Jess

Episode Date: May 3, 2024

Dive into the latest episode of "Spiritually Speaking" with Sam & Jess! This week, we're getting real about the rollercoaster of emotions.. Sam shares her journey through the big highs and lows of the past week, while Jess opens up about her anxieties surrounding her upcoming travels. Tune in for an authentic and heartfelt conversation that's sure to resonate with your soul

Hello and welcome to Spiritually Speaking with me Sam and with me Jess. Hello everyone. Hello. For some reason right whenever we start this podcast I feel like I feel the need to say where we are when we're recording it. I was just about to say that and then I was like why do I do that every week? Well we're in our beds aren't we? We are. So we are basically doing like a lockdown 2.0. We are. we are so we are basically doing like a lockdown 2.0 living that way no we're practicing on zoom because summer is fast approaching and the podcast will be predominantly done on zoom so we're having a practice and it's raining well this is it we had a storm whatever it wasn't like the major storm the other week but we had a storm here if you had heard it

3am was it bad it was really bad yeah it was exactly like last week's oh was it whenever it was yeah yeah it was really bad um so that's why we might sound different we might sound better yeah we're like we're intrigued how this is gonna sound so hopefully it's not terrible but I am I'm heading off on my travels from the 3rd of June so we needed to I know oh my god so we needed to um get a bit savvy didn't we with technology yeah get practicing we've got headphones on look at us we are in the zone do you know what I might actually just take a quick picture so that we can be like guys I know like oh I've got my iPhone storage is full that's depressing that is depressing sorry you pay for more storage I probably just need to I just haven't got around to it I also feel I can't even

take a picture Sam oh I can do it yeah because I feel sorry for all these people listening to us yes there we go there we go cute that's right done oh oh what just happened there's balloons okay okay right let's remember what's going on with you we need to talk about what's going on with you because if we start talking about what's going on with me an hour and a half is going to pass well that's all right well okay I'll give you an update on my life and then you can give an update to everyone in your life because it's been a lot, hasn't it, my girl? So I've got a sinus infection. So just in case you think I sound like I can't breathe or I'm a bit nasally, that's why. And I'm going to get some antibiotics after recording this. I'm good, girl. It's been really busy. I feel like I'm probably on a bit of a, not a burnout, that would be extreme to use that.

Do you feel like you're heading into one? Yeah, I think I'm all right. I think the sinus infection's caught me. I think the body does this, doesn't it? There's that phrase, isn't there? Yeah, if you don't stop, then your body will make you or something like that. And yeah, it is pretty true. Yeah. So I feel like I've just been really on one, which has been great. But I can feel my body is just like, babes, just slow down, please.

So I'm listening to my body. And I've been in my pajamas all day. Obviously with the rain, it helps. Yeah. So that's kind of the main thing. I've been just like it sounds so boring but just focusing on work but I booked my travels which is quite a big deal so I'm going to Thailand on the 3rd of June I'm flying from Sharjah airport so you booked it yeah

so people told me about this and I completely forgot about it and I should have really told you about it but um yeah Sharjah airport supposed to be much cheaper yeah and Andy flew from there he went to Istanbul and he said it was absolutely fine yeah so it's like a third of the price so it's a no-brainer fantastic yeah so um where in Thailand are you going straight to Phuket um I've actually booked like two weeks in one place, which I know like people, like you should spend three days here, do that. But obviously I'm on no time yourself. Ground yourself.

Yeah. Like I don't, obviously I'm limited to the visas, but then I can just kind of move around. But I just need a bit of downtime. So I've just booked somewhere. It's like a cabana on the beach. I'm buzzing. Oh, nice.

And this is actually the first time I've booked something like just for me and just on your own as well on my own um I'm going to be traveling on my own for the summer people might come and join me um like obviously anyone's welcome anyone listening if you want a holiday public service announcement if you'd like to join Jess on holiday do you know what though like when I lived in the UK and like being single like you didn't really get like holidays were quite hard to book um living here it just feels a lot more easier so yeah any single girls you know or men it's men yeah no yeah single men you're definitely welcome um no it's so true though like I've got friends that are um single in the UK and they

wouldn't necessarily think to book a holiday like you have yeah um it's not really as much of the done thing whereas I think here probably we kind of get pushed out of Dubai really in the summer because it gets so hot that it does make people want to leave so that yeah I think so well that's the UK is quite nice in the summer isn't it yeah I did the UK for the summer last year which was great and I loved that but I don't want to do that this year I'll go home for like a month for Christmas um so yeah my plan is Thailand so start off in Phuket just chill I just want to start getting um I want to write a book which I've like been thinking about for a while and I just want to start sorry you will write a book, which I've been thinking about for a while, and I just want to start getting... Sorry, you will write a book?

I will write a book, Samantha. Yes. You're absolutely right. And the plan is to start it when I'm there. And I've got a few ideas that are floating, but I feel like they're going to arrive there. Yeah. And I've been looking at my astrology chart.

You can look at the world map. Okay. And you can see different planets and, like, the lines that go on to certain parts of the world map and you can see different planets and like the the lines that go on to certain parts of the world so Thailand and Vietnam is a really like expansive creative place for me so that's where I'm gonna spend my time building this more online part of my business and so yeah it's really cool isn't it yeah that's so interesting I really want to know where mine is now I'll have a look for you yeah because this is like my new obsession so like I was obsessed at looking at everyone's

charts now I'm obsessed at looking at the world map and the planets and also there's like a really um interesting like line that's like really good for me but it's Papua New Guinea which is really tribal it's like next to Indonesia um and I um was talking to my friend and I was like like what's it like and he was like I think like it's really dangerous there and I um was talking to my friend and I was like like what's it like and he was like I think like it's really dangerous there and I'm like it's a really good line for me like I'll be really successful there he's like maybe in a tribe and I'm like I'm I'm here for that I could see myself naked with leaves on my boobs and being part of my tribe oh my god um I'm just imagining you know Bridget Jones when she gets arrested I'm imagining that and

they're like oh why did you come here Jess you're like well and the world map my line is my Venus line was all over Papua New Guinea so they're like you can't be here um but yeah so that's the plan so basically maybe three months away I don't know go the flow see what happens yeah yeah so like obviously you're limited to like like visas and stuff but you just pop around move around I'm really drawn to Vietnam as well I know it's not like the peak season but I'm kind of here for that because I don't really I would rather it be a bit more quiet a bit more chill and obviously I'm not in a I think when you live in a hot country it's very different yeah you want to go somewhere and there'd be nice weather it's not like you would obviously care

if it was raining every day but like it is a different thing when you come from when you live in the sun but also I can just like move if I don't like it so yeah um so I've been breaking it down I've been really anxious about it I've been really stressed um stressed that's a big I haven't been stressed but I have been anxious um because I do feel a bit scared to like go on my own yeah I'd say that's completely normal yeah I also think like there's always that whole you know what doesn't scare you isn't I don't know yeah I don't know it doesn't kill you basically what yeah I won't sing it as much as I know you all want me to um but yeah no I think that it's good to be scared of something oh that's what the phrase is nothing good comes from a comfort zone something like that yeah yeah totally but I just think that being scared of it is a really good thing

and you're gonna make it work yeah and you've got so much like passion behind going and like you know starting to write your book and all these different things and this is just going to be like a part of that story yeah um I think so yeah I think you'll inspire a lot of sorry I think you'll inspire a lot of people as well um who are in a similar situation to you to do something similar yeah I think so thank you babes I think for me this is like for some people this is really easy for some people this is really difficult I would say I'm actually probably more on like if there's like a middle line more on the difficult side of this like I'm quite bold in other ways but I wouldn't say I've been very I'm'm not a proactive traveller. You know, I was a Marbella girl all the way, you know, in the early 20s.

Have you ever been travelling then? No. Like literally. So I obviously, when I was in my corporate job, it would be like Mexico two weeks or inclusive Marbella with the girls or like my family. We used to go to Marbella and Ibiza, but not like party stuff. But, you you know and then Covid happened I really haven't seen the world and then I moved here but obviously I moved here for a job so it wasn't like I came here obviously I'm so happy I'm here and I'm so happy that that

happened but I wasn't like oh I want to be in Dubai I didn't have this desire to be in Dubai I just kind of ended up here so this is more like what do I actually want to do oh, I want to be in Dubai. I didn't have this desire to be in Dubai. I just kind of ended up here. So this is more like, what do I actually want to do? What do I want to go and see? Where do I want to be? This is like the first time I've ever done it. Oh, I think that's amazing. Yeah.

So it feels like, so I am a bit scared. And I had like a little moment, I always know you do about it, where I was like sitting on my bed, having a full on chat with Spirit. And I was like, I'm bed having a full-on chat with spirit and I was like I'm really anxious I'm really nervous um and I was like me like give me the strength because you know so if I sound like a rat pussy people probably travel all the time and they're like Jess you'll be fine you will be surprised I think I think more people are going to be agreeing with what you're saying right now and how you're feeling yeah and the opposite well the thing is it really I really felt it in my body so I was like oh my god this anxiety is actually really coming up and anyway the light started like turning on and off um and I was with my

friends and my flatmate we were standing by it and I was like oh I just need that spirit to help me out the light went I was like and then I was like spirit if that's you do it again they did it again and then like it was just so so like brilliant and then later on like about 10 minutes later I was like do you know what I just feel really supported by spirit in the universe blah blah and the light went again and I was like okay it's all good like yeah it was like complete validation for me and I was happy with that so yeah so I know and then obviously I pushed through the anxiety I then booked the hotel so like there was a it was a process of booking a flexible one then I was like actually I'm just

gonna book like the cheaper price and set the dates that was like a week later so like the procrastination definitely was there um and now the flights booked which is great so it's all good I'm um moving in the right direction but there's definitely been anxiety there so you guys are all going to be on the way you're all going to hear it you're going to literally know like yeah when I get there like that's going to be really interesting it's exciting oh I'm really excited I'm gonna be the spiritual experiences like I kind of want this more for me like spiritually this is like an opportunity for me to go deeper into my spirituality because I'm craving that and I think there's Dubai is great it's a really it's actually a

really good place for spirituality um it's it's it's un not unsurprising, it's surprisingly good. Yeah. But I would like to be in an environment that's more nature-focused and more like learning from cultures and spirituality. Yeah. So I will keep you all up to date on what happens. I know, it's exciting, isn't it? Yeah, I think it's going to be fantastic. I think it'd be the making

of year really yeah I think so thanks girl I feel like this is I'm intrigued what's to come and I like it and my tummy feels good as I say that so yeah so that's my main update um and other than that it's all good I think I need to sneeze that's all right um yeah so that's it really but obviously you've had a lot going on and that's obviously what we want to talk about today so this could be another therapy session for Samantha what we are now like the fifth one or that's all right I think we're just like this is maybe this is what it would be just therapy um but you have had a really tough time and and you've also you've had lots going on so why don't you want to well yeah um so this obviously is why

we didn't record last week um I mean I feel like even it feels weird even actually starting with this because so much actually has been going on even before this um but one of the main reasons even in the past episodes when I've just been saying that I've not been feeling myself and things just haven't been so great is that my amazing grandma has sadly passed away um and in the past few weeks leading up to that she was a bit unwell but nothing was seeming like it was going that way at all so it came as like a huge shock um and it might sound silly to say that it sounded like it that it came as a huge shock because she was of an amazing age she was like 92 but we were so close we'd speak on the phone like every other day um she was fully copus mentis is that the right word I haven't got a clue what that means but I think it's copus I think that's the right terminology when um she was completely

with it basically like yeah like she would tell me stories about like from when she was in her teenage years and things like that like she really was fully with it was she a rascal in her teenage years oh yeah 100 percent um even when she wasn't in her teenage years yeah like is there any wild stories or was it just just different funny things yeah just different very interesting but like she told me about how like she got my granddad drunk to conceive my dad. Oh, yeah. Because she really wanted kids. He wasn't sure if he wanted kids and stuff like that. And she could tell me the bar they went to. And she was telling me the drinks that she drank.

She really did have an amazing, amazing memory. And, yes, that's just a bit shit, really, to be honest with you. It's a bit sad. And, obviously, it's hard when you're abroad, and you're dealing with things like that, because you're not around your family, and very lucky that I've got Andy. But it's just a lot, you know, like, obviously, I've just had the girls and she won't get to meet them. Yeah, it's just been hard. That's probably the best way to describe it um and I think I struggle with emotions anyway I'll be honest like I'm not the most well wasn't the most emotional person in the

world and obviously feeling that is difficult because it's trying to like process your emotions and trying to get comfortable processing them as well yeah yeah you've had quite a lot haven't you to deal with emotionally yeah in general yeah yeah exactly um yeah so that's been a lot which I'd say I still haven't completely processed it to be honest like even speaking about it now feels a bit weird um it's not really something that I talk about but it just yeah it is what it is you did really well though just even saying, because obviously that was even quite difficult when we met for coffee the other week, you know. Yeah.

So, you know, and like what I was saying to you was, you know, you're kind of in like a bit of a survival mode because obviously, you know, this is the first time you're dealing with something more emotionally, like turbulent being a mum. So that's like a whole other ball game to like deal with yeah yeah and like I'm glad I think having them is just amazing because it just keeps you distracted and keeps you like you know happy for them and all of that type of thing and then it's when they go to bed at night

that then I'm sat on my own and not on my own necessarily but you know just sat there and that's when then I start to think about it and that's when it's a bit harder um yeah oh yeah it's it's just been a bit difficult um why don't you tell me I'm sorry I interrupted you okay um I was gonna say why don't you tell me something like really funny or really lovely about your nan like what was your nan's name as well I always like she was called joy which is really it was meant like for her that name um however she was called Audrey joy because they um wouldn't christen her as joy so she had to be called Audrey joy um so river my daughter has got um Audrey has her middle name which is really nice yeah um and yeah I used to um surprise my grandma most of times when I went home um because if I told her when I was going home

she would just she would literally expect me like from the plane to be at her house and like as as she got older like in the last couple of, I did start to tell her when I was going home or around about the time. So she had something to look forward to. But before that, I didn't tell her. And, oh, my God, it was the videos of when I surprised her. I was used to videoing it. They were incredible, like, so amazing. And actually, about a year ago, I completely forgot that I did this.

I interviewed her and videoed it and yeah and when when she passed away and I was just looking on my phone at different things of her and I found the videos I was like oh my god I completely forgot that I did this so that's really nice because then I got to send it to my dad and it was my dad's mom so show him you know like I'd asked her things like you know what do you think of dad or what do you think of my mom and you know things like that and she was she always had something amazing to say about everyone um yeah she was so lovely um and everybody felt like they knew her like even if people didn't know her just from seeing all the different videos of her and stuff everyone loved her so yeah she has left an amazing memory at least so yes been

dealing with that and then at the exact same time of the lowest of the low came the highest of the high um because of course my sister god bless her then went into labor so everything happened within a very short 24 to 48 hours of one another um and literally the same place that my grandma passed away my sister was then having her baby so and a little girl didn't she she did she's called ania and she is absolutely stunning and her middle name is joy so she's an ear joy so she's got my grandma's name in there as well so that was really lovely um so yeah and yeah i feel for my sister to be honest in fact that actually makes me a bit upset just thinking about it now i know i think i just feel i know

let it out go i just feel for my sister going through that and going through that at the same time oh I feel bad that she's gonna listen to this and it'll set her off but um yeah I think I feel more sad for my sister because it's already so challenging when you give birth but to go through that on top of that at the same moment I just I can't even imagine it um oh well yeah I didn't actually expect to cry at all then so I am I have I feel all that must be you know for your sister that's a lot of emotions and things to deal with yeah I also feel like it's very quite spiritually beautiful that your nan sort of passed on that to your your sister's fate it's like as if that soul has moved you know there's there's this new soul that's come through and there's something

quite symbolic there as well as much as it's so emotional and you see this quite a lot with families don't you where yeah you do grandparent passes and then a baby arrives um yeah I always feel like those babies and same with your girls because of that sort of closeness your grandma passing like she'll be their guardian angel you know and I think second would have really had your grandma watching over her while she was in that birth and yeah definitely so as much as it's really sad and you know it's hard and she'll be having a party over there in heaven I think they have a bloody great time 100% yeah and like yeah there's yeah there's there's it I think as well like one of the things that's been really strange like wrap my head around is because there's so much to be grateful for

like as in like I feel way more grateful for the stuff than I feel sad about stuff but then still feeling sad when you feel do you know what I mean it's like yeah she lived such an amazing life she was healthy right up until the very very end and it was a very short bit she didn't have like a long drawn out illness like she was so lucky that she didn't have to suffer we didn't have to suffer um like that like there's so many things to be positive about but then when you still feel sad I don't know it's confusing to me yeah it's confusing yeah no it's confusing when you feel fine and then you feel grief and then you feel happiness and yeah and that is what is the most magical thing about life is that we get to

feel and we get to have those things and and it is difficult grief is such a terribly hard emotion to deal with and yeah and and there's no rule book for grief and obviously lots of people come to me with grief as a big thing you know and I can imagine it's so painful but I think you know it's something you just have to feel and yeah I wouldn't say take it day by day I think sometimes it's minute by minute not even hour by hour you know it really can move and change and and it's okay to feel sad it's okay to miss someone and it's okay that you really you know want them here it's okay and it can also it's also really okay when sometimes we have moments where we forget and life is normal our life is happy and and then we feel guilt for

that emotion and that is also okay that guilt is just uh our conscious feeling something can it's just it's okay you just have to ride it and I think for you right now you have just got like a whirl of emotions all going on yeah and that's exactly and also the babes like not being funny like you with your emotions like we've been on a real journey so it's like they've just put you in a real boot camp haven't they yes that is true I remember your mum sent um you a really nice message which you forwarded to me um saying about how from the first episode of the podcast to now she was like it's really nice to see like the journey that I've been on in terms of that which I thought was really lovely yeah well you have been on such a journey your motherhood journey that you're it's very vulnerable you've shared so it's beautiful it's very inspiring what you've shared but you

know you you've had a lot go on and everyone's seen it from before the girls got here to now so yeah you're you're doing really well and I think thank you with all the emotions especially with losing your grandma like you know it's just a case of taking it bit by bit and also not being with your family like your parents and stuff um you know you'll be with them soon and then you know yes you just need to need that time yeah you know yeah exactly yeah I think I was I was just feeling that little bit of like homesick obviously wanting to be there for my sister wanted to be there for my dad and my mom and everyone else and feeling a bit like helpless um and Andy Blessing was like you know if you need

to go home you can go home and you're trying to come up with all these different scenarios because I can't fly legally on my own with the girls and because there's two of them by the way in case people are like why can't you it's because there's two and they're under two and they have to be on your knee that's why yeah um but anyway and it just wasn't going to work and I was like no no I'll go home when I'm planned to go home anyway at the end of May and that will be that um and then anyway it's worked out that I'll get to obviously go to the funeral so that's worked out well and then I'll get to meet my beautiful niece as well well this is it yeah exactly so it'll be a big trip a big trip yeah yeah your sister's gonna meet your girls I know yeah which will be amazing there'll be yeah yeah a lot like i say lots of highs lots of lows

and then the other day so what day is i don't know what day it is today thursday yeah on sunday i went out for a walk um as i do every morning with the girls and i came back into my apartment and my best friend was in my apartment from home and oh my god I literally jumped out of my skin I'll probably have to share the video actually on the I will share it on the yeah on the Instagram but I was completely shook I was so surprised um which was amazing and he literally just flew out for like three days um and that was the real like just a little bit of home that I needed um and just distraction as well even you know and yes yeah it was lovely really really nice yeah I'm so pleased he did that um I met Jack Sam's friend

um for breakfast and it was just so nice yeah um and I think it is nice to have that bit of home isn't it when you're going through lots of emotions like you kind of you kind of cope but then when someone comes from home I had my friend from home um visiting with her other half and just even spending the day with them I'm like oh it's just it's just nice isn't it yeah definitely especially with everything going on so yeah so you've had a lot going on my girl yeah a lot going on I feel like there's even more stuff than that to be honest but I can't even remember half this half of it now I mean we had obviously all the floods here as well which we've not even spoken about because that was when we um didn't do the episode didn't do the record which I mean obviously if you live in Dubai then

you've lived through it and if you didn't live in Dubai then you might have thought we just got a little bit of rain but believe you me we didn't well it did get a bit publicized in the UK which made me laugh because I just was getting lots of it was very lovely so thank you everyone for that reached out to check I was okay yeah um but it was really bad like people really suffered here and you know what I think for me like the biggest thing is that mother earth is just talking to us and I don't like the physical damage that happened and lots of people of their homes are so sad but I think about the more like the fact that the earth is a planet and like all what we do to it and what we do to her and all

that and sometimes I feel like she's just like you fucking idiots and it just you know you can't mess with nature can you yeah exactly messing with it too much it reminds you how small we are yeah that was insane like I was in in my living room and it was two o'clock in the afternoon the sky went black oh it was literally black I was on face time to my sister and I was like oh my god and then before I knew it went green did you see it go green it was really weird I was on FaceTime to my sister as well um it just I didn't see it go green babes but I'm all for that I just saw it go black and then I was I saw like a whole um like balcony chair dining table come off a balcony opposite yeah and smash onto the bridge and I was like shit

this is scary. It's so dangerous. It was really scary. I started thinking, I thought we were going to have a power cut. So I boiled loads of water because I was thinking of the girls bottles. Well done. I know.

What a survival mode, my girl. Well done. I know. I just went into full survival mode. Yeah. So yeah, that was funny.

My flatmate got stuck at Mall of emirates for the night oh my um because or a little bit of it yeah well basically she went she went to a co-working space and i was like well babes wouldn't do that today like the weather's not good she said no it's all right it's all right i was like okay fine so anyway she went there and i messaged her like babes it's like it quite dangerous. I think you should get back home. And I've not left the flat. Like I basically was in my pyjamas, went down to the shop. I bought like Easter eggs that were left over.

I was like, I'm going for it. Yeah, like I slept. Like I actually had like a really lovely day. Like and also when like the weather's really extreme, my body like responds to it. And I just, I think I had 10 hours sleep, went to the shop, got Easter eggs and then I fell asleep for like another four hours it's very bizarre it's very bizarre yeah so anyway in the meantime my flatmates have been chaos like life like I'm like babes are you

okay she um had to she got in a car managed to get halfway to more of Emirates and the water was like up to the window of the car so she's like oh my god this is so scary so then she had to get out and walk it was all sewage water which is so dangerous like not even that as well like that in itself was so dangerous like the water and being like contaminated and everything but also like there was electric lines electrical stuff yeah because yeah people because that actually did kill people I I think. Yeah, I think it did. Yeah, who were, like, walking in the water. It was so bad. But then she ended up in Mull of Emirates.

And then I get the giggles because she managed to get into Marks & Spencer's and buy a pair of pyjamas. Oh, this story, it kills me. I can picture her. I can literally picture it. She then got, like, really drunk in a bar that was, like, left open, managed to get in the Kempinski for the night. They charged, like, really bad high rates, which is very naughty in my opinion.

Naughty Kempinski. Yeah. I think that's shocking, I really do. I do, I think it's terrible. You've got nowhere else to go to put your eats up that much. I think it's absolutely terrible. They should be disgusted with themselves. I agree, I agree, Samantha.

And then she managed to get, so you think she left what was it Tuesday the stall yeah Tuesday 9am she left and she didn't get back till 3pm the next day and she's wearing her Marks and Spencer's pajamas and bless her it was just the way she opened the door it was like this darkness from the sky and then then she rocks up in her Marcus and Vince's pyjamas. And I was like, babes. Oh, my God. I just felt for her. And I just felt bad because I actually had, I was fine.

The only issue I had was the lift was broke. So I had to do like 20 flights of stairs and that was tough. Oh, wow. It must be tough. But like I can't complain because obviously people's homes were um really damaged ruined some of them some of the videos and I'll tell you this was one thing where I was like I need to just turn my phone off the amount of whatsapp groups that I've got with different people like the girls from work or my friends or whatever yeah and the same videos were

getting shared in all these all these groups but the anxiety that it was giving me because I couldn't get to the salon so I didn't know how that was yeah get to the house so i didn't know how my house was and all i'm seeing are videos of water up to people's ovens i know it's so bad it was insane oh god yeah i really feel for people who were really badly affected because yeah we're just not built for it here like nowhere's built for that much rain but yeah it's like we have we've had loads it's absolutely insane but yeah then today it's rained as well so basically because of what happened last week every um Dubai went into a bit panic mode they were going to get rain again today so they just have closed most things like today and

tomorrow so like schools are remote learning um and it's not even that bad, to be honest. No, we was really lucky, thank goodness, but, yeah, I actually went out and walked in it today,

I had a really nice little rainy walk. I tried to, I got outside my building, it was throwing it down, and I didn't have a rain cover on the pram, and I was like, it's probably not very responsible, so I didn't.

Yeah, you'd definitely get judged, you'd probably be on like some, yeah, I'd probably be on like some yeah probably be on facebook yeah shame shame shame on her you know I went for a lovely walk I had my flip-flops on like when it rains it's just like why would you wear trainers because they're gonna get wet just embrace that your feet are gonna get wet and then they'll dry because you'll slip would you not slip I had babes I did not sleep I was very much firmly surprised you even had um flip-flops on I would have been around barefoot yeah I would have but I was like no keep keep the flip-flops on um and then I just went and got some scrambled eggs at the mall

lovely um and then I've been in my pajamas all day because I feel sorry for myself I'm poorly so oh but now it's warm I'm like oh i feel a bit a bit you know wearing a tracksuit and a bit sluggish now i do i do i feel like an absolute slug you've got time you can get out now for the rest of the day i'm gonna cook i'm gonna do nandos tonight homemade nandos so i'm gonna cook after this but yeah i do but i'm i think the temperature god this is boring you're talking about weather but it's getting hotter here now like it's really hot oh my god or do anything well I again I wasn't necessarily gonna mention this because I really do sound like

the worst mom in the entire world but we went for breakfast the other day right and I didn't realize that it was just amping up the heat as much as what it was and one of the things when you have babies it's so fucking hard to get your head around is when they're too hot and too cold because it's just really hard to know basically anyway we took them out for breakfast we could only sit outside because i've taken the dog with me because trying to be a good dog mom i thought he needs a walk so i'll take the dog anyway i had to sit outside that's fine the girls had fans on them and then I thought right it's getting quite warm now so took the clothes off them and just had them in the nappies and they looked dead cute didn't they and they were fine they were absolutely fine they were chilling um anyway I then had to walk back from

breakfast and it was about a good 25 minute walk and it was getting hot and all of a sudden I'm thinking the poor dog on the floor with his paws I'm worried about him I'm worried about the baby's overheating I effectively sprinted back right I was absolutely done in by the end of it and I put the dog on top of the pram did I send you a picture of this send me the picture yeah I put the dog on top of the pram did I send you a picture of this send me the picture yeah I put the dog on top of the pram he was living his best life but he was and sprinted back to my apartment I got in the apartment put all the ac up and was like oh my god I'm checking the girl's temperature they were absolutely fine but you know he messaged me like I'm such a bad mum and I was like no you know I was like because the weather was actually totally manageable like not that long ago like a week ago all of a sudden it's just changed so I think that's okay and yeah it's just yeah it's

just this this you live and learn don't you you live and learn girl it's all right not being funny it's what it's about like what did they do all those years ago like well yeah exactly especially over here honestly wouldn't have had AAC or anything that well it was tribal life wasn't it obviously they would have yeah they would have had their ways but they would have been exposed to the heat and you know yeah it would have been i guess you'd be breastfed for a very long time wouldn't you you would though like that's like you would because how else would you be fed like if you had a dessert you know I guess there's that kind of you'd be feeding the whole family with your your babies that's so funny I um got into a bit of my tourist energy as well and I've done a little bit of shopping

oh just a little bit for the villa or for you no for me oh good well done what have you got tell me um no i just went online and ordered myself a nice pair of shorts um good and ordered the girls a couple of bits um we've got a staycay this weekend my birthday yeah this is my birthday on saturday saturday um so we're going and staying at the hotel that we got married in which is like a two-day time yeah what day i thought your birthday is the 6th of may no fourth may the fourth be with you fourth fourth fourth oh my god i really had it in my head that my niece is the sixth that's why um so what are we doing for your birthday you keep avoiding it.

And I'm like, do you not want to hang out with me? No. I'm going to make this all about me. No, let's definitely do something. I'm just not in that zone right now. I know, I know. I'm just not in the mood to celebrate. But yeah, it is what it is.

I think we'll do a belated birthday special. Fabulous. I thought you were about fuck that like that thank you where I'm like I'm gonna have a whole month about my birthday yeah no I'm glad that you did that though I just have too much else going on and I'm just not that I feel like mentally I haven't got space to give to it yeah next year we're gonna go large yeah that's fine next year I can go live for it I think staycation's perfect and it's where you got married isn't it yeah it's where we got married and we had points um from when we got married so it didn't even cost us anything which was amazing um I obviously love it there and it's the first time going, staying anywhere with the girls, so I'm going to have to pack my whole kitchen sink.

That's all right. It's a shop worst case. 100%. If not, drive 30 minutes back down the road to where we live. Are you going to get a massage? I haven't booked one. You should book one.

I had a massage there. It's good at that hotel. Yeah, they are good there. Yeah. I had a couple's massage there. It good at that hotel yeah they are good there yeah i had a couple's massage there it was very nice um yeah no maybe i will maybe i will book one um i should do i'm just happy to have a bath have a nice bottle of wine just have a wash yeah have a wash no you need to book a massage babes honestly like I'm sorry but don't don't be basic you're not basic I'm not go and get a massage booked in and like I'm here for a bath like I get it have a bath have um I went to say delivery room service like that but please just go and get a 90 minute

massage that's the least you could do for yourself, for your 30th birthday, anything you've been through. Fair enough. I think everyone listening will agree. They'll all be nodding their head going, yes, yes, Samantha. Yeah, that's fair. So do that because you should. Okay. And I think that would be really nice

and you can just have a little time to do. And you'll be fine with the girls. Do it around nap time. Yeah. Oh, yeah, he's with them now. He's all. Do it around nap time. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He's with them now. He's all right. He's got it.

Yeah, he's great. And then, yeah, we'll just have to celebrate your birthday after. When do you go back to the UK? 20-ish of May. Okay. So we've got time. Yeah. Well, we need to do, we'll have to do something before I head off as well.

Because I won't see you for a few months. Like life just in real life we're just gonna be like this i know it's gonna be weird we need to do our um we are just fully waffling on here by the way do you ever forget that people listen to this yeah i do yeah i do um and we need to get our manifestation workshop yes we do running soon we've been talking about it I think it's going to be well good definitely say say something that you've manifested give people an insight what is it that you've manifested uh I feel like I've manifested my whole life but I don't yeah I agree like so like but literally I've always wanted to be able to travel and be free and work for myself and I'm

doing that and that honestly never felt possible so I've definitely manifested that um I know my my biggest manifestation was with my therapist when I said when she was like babes she didn't say babes but let's just pretend she did she was like babes were you looking in a mirror she's like what do you want from life and I was like I want to live in a hot country and work for myself do my spiritual work and that's honest to god what I said to her I actually said Ibiza but I think I'm working my way to the Mediterranean at some point but not yet you and me both we are girl we've got this that's where I'm hoping my world map is when you said that before I was thinking I hope mine's so far most of mine's in Saudi um and actually the UAE's got quite a lot

of lines and in Vietnam and Thailand and then like the Greenlands is like where I'm going to meet my man apparently and I'm like well I'm sorry but I haven't I don't that's like I think that's not the type of man you were looking for. Well, I don't even know what type of person they are from, the Greenlands. What are they? I have no idea. Absolutely no clue. Like culturally, I don't have a clue.

Like do people live there? Is it just land? Is it just green land? Like I don't know. Maybe it's a farmer. Oh, I'd be happy. Do you know what? Like I would happily live on a farm like I would like not do animal

stuff like I don't want any any jobs connected to the farm but I would live in a nice house with land and live on land yeah yeah yeah just like a lovely big plot of land and I don't need a big house just a big plot of land where I can have like just a really lovely outdoor kitchen but not like modern. Like I would cook my food outdoors every day, like I'd be outdoors and then I'd like some little pots. In the rain. Yeah, in the rain.

I'd be like, right, we've got fresh water from the rain. It would be some spiritual holy water that I've got from the clouds um and then I would have some little like little pod cabins so people can come and like spend a few days and get all spiritual and yeah I'd grow my own fruit and veg I actually think I will have this by the way I see it all the time I was about to say this is probably going to be your next manifestation yeah and then I always see like the outdoor space and then basically my kitchen would be like big, but it wouldn't, again, it'd be old, old table, really big table. And then there's loads of like different food on it that I've made, like salads, all this

healthy stuff. Cause I'm going to be a real skinny bitch when I'm there. In my skinny bitch era. I do think the skinny bitch era is actually coming and I actually remember spirit saying in your 30s you'll find it and I was like all right I'll wait so I'm gonna enjoy that McDonald's in my 20s and no but I think I'm actually on the way to becoming a vegetarian which is actually like really it's very conflicting for me um so anyway you asked me what my manifestation is I've just sort of said what one of them would be,

which I'm working towards. But this life I'm living now, I've absolutely manifested like 30. I stopped manifesting men because I was getting the wrong ones. So, yeah, I feel like you can manifest the perfect man and then there's that one thing that's really crucial that they might not have. So you have to be a bit mindful of that. So, yeah.

What about you, girl? You've literally manifested everything. Yeah, pretty much everything, to be fair. Twins was a big one. But, yeah, I would say everything. Like you say, life here, yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you've done really well there funny actually because I was having a clear out today and um I found one of my notebooks from two years ago and it was like my goals um from two years ago and it was really interesting um of like where

I wanted to travel to um what I wanted to do with my career and now actually I've surpassed what I was aiming for at that point um which was really nice to see so yeah oh my goodness where I I literally crack up when I read my old journals yeah because one of mine I wrote a letter to future me and it was like two years from now this was two years ago when I first got to Dubai and I was like what the fuck am I doing honestly I don't know like but I was like I do know what I want and basically I wrote this letter and I was like babe this is all good you're like really good at what you do like you've set up your own business and all this stuff. And I actually remember writing it thinking,

this ain't going to happen. Like this is like ballsy that you're saying all these things. And I read it and I was like, oh, it did happen. So I do think it's good to look back at your journals. I've got a big journal at the moment that I'm doing for my Saturn's return. And I'm like, it it's gonna be really interesting when I read back on that when I look back at this time add it into the book well yeah because each chapter is like more chapter of the book but my journal is of a different man in my Saturn's

return so I need to work I actually had a little chat for myself I was like seriously your journal is all about penis like seriously you seriously, you need to like. Well, you did say Venus, bring me the penis. Bring me the penis. Yeah. I'm having a bit of a dry spell there, girls. So we need to manifest that. But I think I have troubles that will happen.

But in all seriousness, I'm sure loads of people that are single or were single can relate to like all self-help and self-development being focused on a relationship and a man. And that when I was looking at all the journals, I was like, you know what? I just, it's not the answer. And like now I look at what I've been writing about me, like these travels, these trips, like I'm actually doing what I want for once. I'm not like focusing it on someone else and trying to like get someone else to bring you happiness yeah or be like oh when I meet someone they'll want to travel we can do it together or like when I meet someone I'll set up my business like that's what a lot of women say to me when they come to me and I'm like fuck that like why yeah fine if you've got a husband that can support you that's

amazing but what if your husband doesn't come along for five years and in those five years you're just miserable in your job because like yeah you're waiting and then you don't do it in five years time like well yeah exactly so I feel like yeah I had to kind of do it myself because they were like babes come on and that's what I've done I'm really proud of that actually you should be strong independent woman yeah yeah so it's good so I think yeah there's loads of things but yeah we're gonna get this manifesting workshop and I think what we're gonna do is we're working out the logistics so I won't bore you with all of it but what we'll do is it'll be like a live session, but you can also get the recording and it's going to be something that you can

listen to or watch like multiple times. Like the aim is, is that you could get so much from it again and again and again. Yeah. And then we might delve into some other things. So like, let us know if you want to know more. Cause I think that's,

you know, the, the podcast, I absolutely love this podcast. Also, I was looking, we've had like nearly 3,500 downloads now yeah it's gone coming to that yeah it's like it's skyrocketed recently yeah so I think yeah it

has it has I think we're getting we're getting our rhythm girl won't we but um what would be nice for us is now we're thinking about how this content and what we can do to bring more. Yeah, give people even more value. Yeah. So things like that, like having those workshops and other things, I think that would be quite nice. We did think about a book club at some point,

so we're toying on that, aren't we? I don't know. We've got to work out what that would be. I was going through all my books before and I was like oh my god I've got so many books I need to get rid of yeah don't get rid of them donate them oh no I always donate them oh good I wouldn't yeah when I say get rid of I mean like pass on okay good yeah good oh well well should we like we're at the end now aren't we I think we asked them for so um do you want to do the outro okay you're the outro you're the outro girl well thank you so much for listening to us again

um on this week of spiritually speaking um and yeah do all your amazing stuff and tell someone share it on instagram and tag us like rate subscribe all the other stuff all that stuff and if you want to find us on instagram i am at hair by samantha green and we are at spiritually speaking underscore podcast and i am at jessicamarie underscore holistic yeah well done thank you and we will be back again next week we will with an older me oh my god yes i'm gonna be all my shit is gonna be together by next week so that's what happens isn't it you've had your shit together for a long time my girl so i won't worry about that oh my thing's just frozen what did you just say I said you've got your shit together, you've always had it together, girl.

Yeah, you're right. Yeah, I think if one of us hasn't, it would be more me, so don't worry. You feel the feels. But anyway, lots of love, babes, and lots of love to everyone listening. Thank you. Bye.