Spiritually Speaking with Jessica & Samantha - Pilot - Get to know Jessica Marie: The Ebbs & Flows of Life

Episode Date: December 20, 2023

In this episode, it's all about Jessica Marie, the spiritual babe unlocking her intuition and holistic wisdom. Join Jessica as she candidly shares the ebbs and flows of her life, diving into experiences of love, heartbreak, and the rewarding challenge of setting up her own business. Throughout the episode, she opens up about the transformative process of tapping into her intuition & spirituality. This instalment offers an intimate exploration of Jessica's profound and enlightening journey, a unique blend of resilience, self-discovery, and the pursuit of spiritual authenticity. Don't miss this chance to connect with Jessica as she shares a glimpse into the vibrant chapters of her life so far.

Hi and welcome to this episode of Spiritually Speaking. So in this episode it's going to be really different to any of the other ones that you are going to hear. Basically it is me and you getting to know Jess. I am going to ask her all different questions about her story, how she's ended up where she is now. Some of the things in this episode really surprised me, were things that even I didn't know. And it's just a really nice, insightful way for you to get to know her before you become addicted to our podcast and want to know everything later on down the line. So I hope you enjoy this episode and we will see you soon. Hi and welcome back to Spiritually Speaking. In the last episode it was very heavily about myself and so today it is going to be about Jess

and we are going to learn all about what she does and what she is about all the really exciting stuff like I'm really excited for this to ask all these questions because as much as I feel like I know bits I actually don't know the full story I feel like we've never actually fully gone into that so you're in for a treat um to learn all about Jessica Marie um so I'm gonna ask you first we're gonna do this a little bit like an interview style but just a bit of free flow and yeah feel the vibes um and yeah I want to know first how did you start your career but actually pre what you do now okay yeah so what were you doing before okay cool yeah that's a good place to start. So I'm the cliche, worked corporate for 10 years.

I worked in London. So I left school when I was 16, similar to you, quite young. I didn't really fancy college sixth form. I just wanted to earn loads of money. I wanted to be really cool. And I worked in London and I absolutely loved it. It was just the best 10 years ever um well the last few years were a bit hard going because I was ready to make a change

okay um I worked in marketing for a lot of it which was great it was really fun I organized parties I got to travel um that was the first time I flew business class and I was like I'm just living the dream oh my god living your best life that's young as well time I flew business class and I was like I'm just living the dream oh my god living your best life that's young as well to be flying business class for the first time I went to Singapore and I was like 26 organizing this event and I was just like this is crazy that is so nice yeah I loved it like you know I I wouldn't say I was made for the corporate world I loved the company that I worked for they were just a very very good company um I grew up there like yeah I was like it was like a transitional stage of your life yeah and there's so many

very very important people that I met on that journey in that career so I did stay at the same company for 10 years um and I have been on such a transformational journey over my 20s. And if 20-year-old Jess knew this was my life, she would be like, what? Really? This is outrageous. It was nothing that you ever saw coming? No. No way.

Was it a goal? No. Oh, wow. This is not what I wanted. Okay. I'm very happy. Yeah. But I didn't have this on my vision board wow I didn't ever think this would be my life and it's absolutely outrageous that it is oh that's so nice it's it's interesting because like your life you've you've like yeah I'm like I planned this your vision board like mine's just like freedom travel but when I when I was you know 17 working in London I just wanted to be a corporate girl that was the goal I wanted to get married I wanted to have kids

and that was that is crazy because I just don't see yeah I'm like what that's not like you know that was just and imagine if you had stuck to that well there was a boyfriend that could have led to that okay and I think that breakup transitioned the spiritual like boom but yeah that was nearly my path and it would have been the wrong path and it would have been a really unhappy path for me um but something came in intuitively and was like no you need to make some changes so so marketing London corporate that's the theme of my 20s okay for the first trunk of my 20s yeah um and then I have always been spiritual and what I mean by spiritual we're all spiritual

we all are we're all connected in one way or another. Yeah. I have always been a very sensitive child, very emotional. You know, someone would be in the street lost, they would ask me where to go. Like I just always had this thing that I couldn't explain, I couldn't put it into words. And I always would say I just had an inner knowing. Okay. So I would know when someone was like good for me sometimes I'd

know they're bad but I'd still go there yeah but I had this inner feeling and we all have it yeah this is not a gift like that's the first thing I will say this is not a gift we all have this divine energy we have just been conditioned and we've lost it so I feel as though I'm here to help people find it okay because we all have it and I think that's really important and I squashed it I just didn't like it um and it was a very difficult time especially in my early 20s like I was drinking all the time I was out all the time I was anxious all the time so the intuition was like how do I get in yeah so I had to really find the voices that were kind of coming through and and obviously in an environment where I'm around lots of people

that was really difficult you know the floor the office floor hundreds of people you know, the floor, the office floor, hundreds of people, you know, it's just busy. Yeah. So I didn't have a clue and I was overwhelmed and I was burning out without realising. So that was a really intense time for me in my corporate career. And then I had, like I say, I had my boyfriend who was like my first love. And that, you know, I was ticking all the boxes. I had a really good job. I had a lovely boyfriend. Well, like when I say lovely, like, you know, like stereotypical, it all like...

Lovely for that time. Yes. Yeah. And he was. Yeah. And I bought a place, I bought property. Like I was 23 and I was like boom boom boom tick wow you bought a property yeah my god yeah so it was just like you know I was I was so grown up yeah and I was

and you were I do love a clue and I was rushing yeah I was forcing everything like even that relationship poor guy like really we shouldn't have been together but I forced it you know and I own that this will work yeah yeah and like of course we loved each other yeah you know it's that kind of thing like my career I was like I'm gonna be a boss babe and I was like why you know me that's not me yeah yeah but I was always ambitious so I always had ambition I'd always go for like higher roles I worked my way up went for different opportunities so yeah so like my my like first chunk of my 20s was yeah like a very unrelatable version that I know now but I love her and I disassociated with her for a long time because I just thought oh

like what would you do with him but if I didn't do that I wouldn't be where you are now yeah so so that that's the summary of the corporate side and my career and then obviously the cliche covid happened I was single then at this point so we'd gone through our breakup and I was like heartbroken like the saddest I have ever been really oh my goodness oh that feeling it was oh I just was devastated yeah in in from my perspective he was the love of my life yeah and we were meant to have this whole life together and I was just so sad yeah any of my friends that like they just I would just cry all the time I was just broken that's horrible yeah well now I'm like oh my goodness yeah of

course he had a path and I had a path and we were really lucky to have that time together but yeah yeah just it was actually such a small part of your story now but at that time it's like you can't see past it yeah and I would say that that was the first time that I ever experienced like intense depression oh wow yeah so from a mental health perspective I was struggling you know my anxiety was always there I just didn't know it right but then the depression hit me and like the questioning of who I am why am I here yeah and wow all because of this but that was just my journey like yeah he was there and the situation caused this but I had to go through this yeah and it was life-changing but it was

really hard and I had my property so I was lonely in COVID so you were living on your own yeah wow yeah so it was tough yeah I was working from home um so I was you know it was a really really difficult time for me yeah very and yeah I had I started therapy um which was incredible and my therapist is just the most amazing person ever I love that yeah I texted her drunk the other week I was like oh just you're the best person in the entire world because you haven't spoke for a while and she was like I was thinking about you the other day and I was like oh that's so yeah so it was just this you know I needed therapy yeah I didn't tell anyone I was having therapy because it felt shameful what made you decide to have therapy I was just so low right like I just questioned me yeah but I

just and that was because I was not in the right environment yeah so nothing was fulfilling there was no purpose so I just felt nothing and that scared me yeah and I knew I had to do something and nothing was working um but I felt so much shame for booking therapy really I got signed off work yeah so much shame all this conditioning that we've like yeah um it was probably the most challenging time of my life I'm still young and there's lots to come of course so far this was a really difficult time for me yeah definitely um so yeah heartbreak work everything it was just crumbling yeah yeah and I felt like I was failing all my friends were settling down and it was just this cliche like oh my god I'm single I was only like 25 26 and I felt like my

life was over which is just absolutely ridiculous crazy isn't it but at that time you don't you can't see that way and I don't have the skills and the tools that I have now and I think you know they're just going to keep growing yeah so you know luckily I've never felt what I felt then again yeah of course I've had ups and down days and I have volatile mental health in a sense of I'm incredibly emotional okay and I feel a lot um and now I know when I need help yeah and that's amazing yeah definitely like I think we're just all so scared to like yeah which I was yeah so like if I need the support I have the people and I have the resources and you know my family are incredible but usually it's like a trained professional

either a therapist or a healer yeah or whatever and you know that really does help yeah yeah and that's that's kind of the journey I went on so yeah it was intense but it was great um I wouldn't change it and I got signed off of my corporate job and how long for four weeks okay done longer right um but I felt pressure to get back not from anyone else but myself yeah um because I was okay you know I was going to the gym but like actually that time signed off for the years yeah I needed longer yeah and I, I needed longer. Yeah. And I urge any of my clients to do that. And even like you just said I was okay, you weren't okay. No, I wasn't. No, but because you were moving each day, you think, well, I'm okay.

So then there was this thing, well, she's at the house. Yes. Why can't she be at work? Yeah. So there was this like real conflict going on. And I went back and I just wasn't in the best place. And I think I had an argument with my boss, which, again, is very unlike me. Yeah, I couldn't even imagine you arguing with anyone.

No, no, I can, but I try not to. I try to communicate clearly and get the answers. But, yeah, at that point it was quite difficult. So, yeah, that happened. And then I managed to get made redundant. Oh, no way. Which was incredible. and it was through a choice of my own it wasn't part of me so that was again I was being protected I had this feeling

and knowing that something was gonna change for the better I just didn't know what it was and this is that in and of him right so I trusted when opportunities come because what happened was I was offered a promotion and I was just like no I don't want it because I felt so much pressure and then because I didn't want that there wasn't a role for me so redundancy was the option which was great um and it was great on all sides I was done I was at that company too long and I'd say to anyone that resents their job yeah you've probably been there too long you just need to get out yeah definitely because you just need fresh fresh you know if you can evolve and grow within a company incredible but I had got

stagnant and instead of taking responsibility I blamed my environment yeah no I should have taken myself out of it yeah I should have been bold and made a career move, but I didn't. I just stayed and I felt sorry for myself. So then you needed to be made redundant to be taken out of it. Yeah. So I then finally took the choice and it was scary. Kind of in the meantime, I think for about 18 months, I started my side hustle in COVID, which was my spiritual work. So I suddenly had this epiphany with my sister when we were in a pancake shop locally.

Every time I walked past it, I'm like, that's where that happened. And I was like mindfulness magic with Jessica. That was what came to me. And that's what I started off as my business name. And I was petrified to basically come out spiritual to people because they were like who's this girl what's she spiritual can anyone just decide to be spiritual well yeah they are the questions that people have because when you're not spiritual or maybe you are maybe you you know believe in like the side of like manifestation and things

like that but you just don't understand where that beginning comes from. Yeah. And where that starting line is. Yes, exactly. And it was something that felt quite taboo. You know, it felt quite embarrassing. And, you know, I didn't really want to, you know, people knew, but it wasn't something I shouted about.

Yeah. You know, and I guess that's the conditioning of, you know, that sort of spiritual woman yeah in this world in this life that feels suppressed yeah you know and that's something that I'm changing now but yeah it was just like it felt a bit embarrassing prior to this were you always the friend that like gave all the advice okay and I think all my friends can vouch for that yeah like you know I remember before I set up my business we was all drunk at mine and it was like 4am and like the cards came out okay and it was just like incredible and it was so fun um and I was like

okay like something's happening here but yeah as a friend I would say and I still am and I'm still working on this because I do tend to take on people's problems is that I was the advisor yeah now I'm less of the advisor because I've learned that it's not always about advice yeah sometimes you just need to be the friend yeah yeah but I would be that person that would take people in when they were having problems or you know I was just there I would say and I would I would acknowledge that I'm less there now for people in my life and that's been really difficult because I can't be there for everyone you can't and that's where those boundaries come in and these boundaries have been difficult and have kept me up at night yeah but I have just got to a point where I've realized that I have to look after me before I can look after others. What is it? You can't pour from an empty cup.

Yeah, and that's so important and that's like, and I get it now and I live it now but I didn't and I was so tired. No wonder I was struggling and had all these things. So drained. Yeah, so I was that friend but I was also that person to strangers. You know, the person on the train that's crying I'm like I will actually go are you okay oh really and then all of a sudden

I'm at Liverpool Street getting them a coffee and I'm late for work oh you're joking yeah but this was the problem and this is the problem like I would love to be that person it's yeah you know I feel you have so much empathy I do and I think know, I feel. You have so much empathy. I do. And I think that's it. And sometimes I have too much empathy and I have to mind my own business sometimes. So that's another learning that not everything's my problem. And sometimes people just want to cry.

Yeah. And you can just let them. You can just say like, hey, do you need anything? Are you okay? Do you need space? Like, you know, you can ask those Are you okay? Do you need space? Like, you know, you can ask those questions. And I feel as though I know those questions now. But before I would be like, okay, this is now my,

this is what I need to do today. This is my purpose. And I think because I wasn't practicing spiritually, I had to do that because I needed it. It was like this, like, I need help. It's like your soul was like calling for it. Yeah. So then now I think

when I set up the side hustle which was working with people on a one-to-one basis I kind of started it off as like so you'd come to me and we'd meditate and I would do some reiki so I'd done my reiki attunement and then we'll just talk like that and it's kind of still the same thing actually yeah to some extent I've kind of gone back to my original model um but I put this post on Instagram so set up my mindfulness magic it's now evolved to Jessica Marie um I tried to get a bit more sophisticated you and me both I had many many Instagram names over the time um but it was yeah just I put the Instagram post out and said, hey, guys, this is what I'm doing.

I'm charging 20 quid. Come see me for 90 minutes and whatever. And five people booked in. Wow. Yeah. That's a lot. Yeah. Yeah.

Considering, like, I had no testimonials or anything. And, like, I was buzzing. Were there people that you knew? No. Wow. Actually actually my first ever client was from Dubai and she was back in the UK which is weird wow yeah yeah just bizarre yeah um so 125 pound in the bank I then like I was like amazing so I put that straight back in and got like a reiki bed um and like invested straight into the business and that was the start and that was every Monday and Tuesday night and every Sunday so I'm working a busy job I'm

traveling I'm working Monday night Tuesday night Sunday could you ever imagine me doing this no I don't like that's quite a lot like yeah it was too much yeah but it was the only way I could do it because I couldn't go full-time at that point yeah so anyway the redundancy happened blah blah blah um and then it was like ah okay and I was given an opportunity which was incredible to come out here and start working here more as a life coach more holistic um which was an incredible opportunity so at that time then when you moved over here were you still quite at the very beginning of that journey yeah that's actually really interesting because I didn't think that at all like I would not have known

I'd probably been sort of doing it 18 months wow yeah yeah if you just said to me you've been doing it for five ten years I'd have believed you yeah I'm really new on my journey like the thing is like the school of life teaches you yeah and so many things and I've dedicated so much time to my spiritual development you know I have always made time for you know mentors teachers yeah always you've always invested in it yeah yeah and I'm even starting with therapy yeah exactly and there's just so many things I've done I from when I was about 18 investing in me as a person spiritually so like it it's been 10 years of study yeah of course or 29 years of study but 10 years of conscious study yeah definitely um so yeah and that that's kind of what happened so really new opportunity and yeah like why not

let's give it a go um so you came to Dubai came to Dubai I then needed to do some sort of coaching qualifications which again I was like amazing so I invested again in myself and did that and it was really tough actually I didn't connect with it all because perfectly honest yeah it didn't agree with all my belief systems yeah so that was a trigger wait hang on like I don't know if I believe that I don't know I just couldn't so I had to really like understand what like coaching meant yeah of course and like spiritual coaching and also how you could adapt that to what you wanted to do because at the end of the day I just see everyone as a soul yeah like we're in a shell and we're a soul and we have karmic lessons and soul lessons and a soul's journey and it's as simple as that yeah and when it gets complicated I'm like oh gosh like it's over complicated so

I had to kind of go and explore that but that was amazing you know I think I'm like oh gosh like it's over complicated so I had to kind of go and explore that but that was amazing you know I think I spent like eight solid days in this classroom and I was thinking oh when I was working in insurance doing marketing any course I hated it was like nothing stuck but this did oh wow so even though I didn't agree with everything yeah there was it was like substance to it like you knew that something good was going to come from it yeah so then obviously I was like doing my Reiki um I had now done this coaching and I had no clientele but I was just like it'll be fine and you know what really quickly my clientele became very busy here and in the UK. And global.

Yeah, literally. But everyone is all over the world. It's not just about here. It's everywhere. But, you know, I came here with, I just didn't know. And, you know, I'll be honest. I think what my work is very much how you feel. You leave with a feeling.

And it's not tangible. You can't touch it. Yeah. But you'll tell people about it. Yeah. And that's how my business grows because you feel something. And I say business is service, is service to others to help people. It is a business though because you live off it. Yeah, of course.

It is a business and I'm sure it will grow even know like yeah it is a business yeah and i'm sure it will grow even bigger um it definitely is a business yeah and you should be really proud of what you created um but that what you're saying about that feeling i can completely relate yeah because i remember leaving that so one of my friends came to see jess and she'd said to me you need to go and see this girl and I was like okay I saw you and I just could not stop telling people I was like everybody needs to go to see to see Jess like it was such a feeling like you say and so transformative for me in so many ways that I wanted people to experience that and I think that's the beauty of what you do is you make people feel a certain way where they feel empowered or you just open

their eyes to a different way of thinking and seeing things and feeling absolutely that is so um amazing so yeah it is it's it so, not many people can do that. Well, I think. Very few people. I think what it is, is I see potential in everybody. Yeah. And what I mean by potential is I see the goodness of their soul. Because everyone is a good soul.

Yeah. And then the body comes in and the brain comes in and then the conditioning comes in the projections come in and all of a sudden we're a complex creature yeah so then what I like to do is just simplify it yeah and I'm like let's break this down and sometimes you just need someone to help you with that yeah and you know looking at the energy feeling the energy feeling the empathy of what someone's going through sometimes all you need is to feel understood yeah you know of course like sometimes that's all I'm doing yeah and that's what's incredible so I think when I had all these different learnings and this and that I was like

okay you've now got it all. What are you going to do with it? And how are you going to make it you? There was no structure. There was no sort of formalising. I just was intuitive in the way that I worked with every client. And that's how it's evolved. And now, you know, I'm really fortunate that I then, you know, with the opportunity that came here, I then decided to go fully independent.

And that was absolutely the right thing for me because I don't want to be around people. That sounds terrible, but the people I work with as clients is great. But working in the office with like all these people, it wiped me. So then I really quickly learned I need to be private. I need a space that's private you take on everyone else's energies without realizing sometimes there's been a lot of learning of protection so then I understood my needs yeah my work and that was huge and that was like really brave and really bold really scary um but at the end of the day because my purpose is to help

I have to do it. You know, I feel as though there are some very particular ways in my environment, you know, how my table is and the experience when people arrive. But by doing that, it helps me flow and it gives them the best experience. Yeah, definitely. And even last week, I wasn't feeling good. And I really don't like cancelling my clients and I very often do it um but I had to and I was I'm so sorry that I've got to cancel but I just know you're not going to

get the best experience because yeah exactly I just don't feel well and it's not so I I've learned those things and you know it's just takes a lot to learn that it does and I think what I know is that someone can wait a week and it will be right yeah definitely but I also can make a judgment if they need to see me because there's sort of a crisis which sometimes happens but that's okay so so that's how it works there's no label there's no job title there's no none of that yeah that's all just made up yeah it's about a feeling it's about helping people um I also have been studying astrology for the last year and that's changed my life yeah that is amazing yeah and I've been so interesting I'm sure we'll do a whole episode on one of them so there's just so much to explore obviously it's still so new but it's just making things clearer in my mind and when I look at the situations that were going on

and what was happening in my chart I'm like ah yeah so then to be able to learn that and then help others is kind of part of where I see see me evolving um so yeah spiritual you know is just a word yeah which means many things and you can take it for whatever you want but I would say like what it means to me is a deeper inner knowing that you're here for a reason there's something bigger than any of us and it doesn't matter what it is or what it's called it's just that feeling and consciously growing and evolving and taking the lessons and receiving the abundance is really important yeah so I think for me, that's how I feel. And that's what people come and explore when they work with me. And do you love now what you do?

Do you feel like you're now doing what you were meant to be doing? I do. I think there's something else within this journey that will, I think I'll constantly evolve. I always say I will never retire. Because probably on my deathbedbed I will be saying something to the nurse yeah like this isn't a job yeah that's why I say like business it's like oh it doesn't feel like that this is just me yeah this is my purpose and it's to support people

and it's to help people but it's also to grow for me too this is also about me in my journey it's of course about others but and it is that but having the time to look at my own triggers and my own behaviors and my own conditioning has been huge so you know it's the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me and I am incredibly grateful for that for that this has happened um I am I wake up every day so grateful I might wake up anxious and I might wake up sad yeah because of something I will always be grateful yeah um because I'm human I'm here as a human I might have all the but I still have my life stuff yeah of course yeah like I still experience emotions and fear I'm not a robot yeah so like it's you know it might be all love and light but there's also my life and my story there is definitely that like um idea that because of

you know you being spiritual and you having um this almost what i would call a power it's like how how like to me it would or to you know a stranger it might be like that you know the answer to everything yeah and i feel like you must know the answer to everything and that's a lot of pressure to actually have on your shoulders because if you did you'd have a big ego yeah like I don't know everything yeah what I do know is that if you can tap into your own intuition you'll probably get a better idea yeah and if I can help you with that then that's brilliant yeah you know I I can I can maybe say yeah this is what I feel, but that can be the shortcut. Would you relate a intuition to a gut feeling? That's the same thing, yeah.

Same feeling. Yeah. And what happens is we have this deep gut feeling and intuition and then it gets through growing, you know, it disappears in some way. Yeah. And I think it's establishing the voices in your head. And now obviously I'm not trained in how the brain works.

So what I would say on a simple version of, you know, someone who's intuitive is anxiety shouts. Yeah. Intuitive whispers. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I get that.

And that's as simple as it is. Yeah. The shouting is anxiety. Yeah. And the I get that. And that's as simple as it is. Yeah. The shouting is anxiety. Yeah. And the whisper is calm. And everybody's had that experience where like, you've been like, oh, should I listen to my gut? I knew I should have done that.

Yeah. So that's basically what that is. Yeah. And I would use it in my office job. Like I'd send an email and then I'd be like, oh, no, wait, wait. You need to call that person. Yeah. And it would work out, you know. So I would always be quite call that person yeah and it would work out you know so I would always

be quite fortunate yeah that I would use it but I wasn't using it for greater good I was just using it for like day to day yes yeah yeah now it's about people and their journey and how they evolve and how I evolve and yeah it's just the most magical thing ever and I think anyone that's on their journey of like an awakening or and there's so much language out there and it's really quite um it can be quite scary or overwhelming or you know it doesn't need to be and I think my job is to simplify I'm just like let's just make this simple yeah and actually it's so simple it's difficult yeah and that's the issue that it's all this terminology and all this language complicates yeah that's so true yeah

yeah but I think that's what we do as humans yeah our lens complicates every story yeah because of our own stuff and actually when we clean it and we look after it it's much clearer yeah and then it's simple. And then you get, you know, and I think, you know, we live in a world now where we're chasing so many things, money, you know, material things. And that's why when people come to me, my brother-in-law, who I love dearly, is a Capricorn.

And we sat around the fire and had a good old chat when I was back and then he was like but what do I get from this like what can I take away and I was like you're a Capricorn so you need this you need a bit of structure we need a list but it really made me laugh because I was like for some people a tangible you know a feeling it's hard yeah everyone has that yeah definitely you know like some people do need a plan yeah you're a little bit like that yeah definitely I need a list yeah so I'm like I might give you some tasks to do after we've like oh yeah even if you've gone for a coffee I'm like right yeah yeah yeah and I love that yeah like I need that yeah so it's that kind

of thing so then you sort of have to like mold and flex to the people when there was something actually I can't even remember what it is now but there was something I honestly can't think what it was but where we were discussing something about me needing to make some form of decision and you said to me you were like I'm not going to give you the answer to that because you need to figure it out. And I remember being like, oh, for goodness sake, like I'm going to have to now sit down. In fact, I actually do remember what it was now. And I had to sit down and really like process why it was I was feeling a certain way about a certain situation. And I'm so glad that you did make me do that because I'm very much like I just need that quick answer.

And many people yeah have been like that around me yeah and you know people probably take advantage of that but then I've not helped them no of course not and I remember you saying that to me like I'm not going to help you by giving you the answer and it's not about I've got the answer I'm not giving it because I just don't have it yeah it's not my job to have it it's your job yeah so you've got to sit with it and also that must be a lot of responsibility like giving someone an answer because like you say if it's not necessarily the right answer or yeah yeah it's not that one's right and one's wrong but it's a lot of pressure then on your shoulders as well so I think a lot of people

will recognize when I'm like you need to sit with this and they're like what do you mean I'm like you actually need to sit with these emotions and these feelings and unravel it. Yeah. And you just have to sit and be. Yeah. And that is so unfamiliar for us now because we're always on the go. Yeah.

You know, so it's that kind of, it's just basic, you know, behaviour that we've lost. Yeah. And, you know, and I would suggest to anyone with small people and obviously you've got your little babies come in yeah to help them sit with their emotions and feelings because I think really like we didn't have that yeah and that's why we're go go go yeah next goal next goal and I have no goals I have a lot of ambition but I have no goals really yeah okay and you're like I'm like what um so that is something that I've learned to get comfortable with like I say I work two days a week

possibly three at the most uh which I think most people were like what yeah you know I'm single I don't have kids that's like society is like oh no but that is amazing and you're also so comfortable with that yeah which is even more amazing and something that I actually would look at and feel almost a bit jealous of yeah because how comfortable that is for you like for me that's like anxiety yeah but something that i need yeah but something that like would just make me feel so uncomfortable who decided five day work week i mean five if i was lucky like yeah i know who decided that you just get conditioned don't you like it's what you see from like your grandparents and your parents and oh my goodness and society as well but I definitely think that those closest to you are the ones where you really like to take it on of course and that my family were like oh my

goodness yeah and you know I think it was this huge huge change where I questioned everything. Yeah. Like, I don't ever really know what day it is. Yeah. Like, because the days are made up. Okay, we have the moon cycle and that makes sense. Yeah. But we don't even follow the moon cycle as the calendar. Even like, so for this now, it was so funny.

So I was literally messaging Jess and I was like, what are we doing? Like, I need like to plan out like a schedule, you know, we're going to have like a meeting beforehand of exactly what we're going to talk about. And she's like, it's just going to flow. It's just going to flow. And then, but I need that sometimes.

Like I need somebody to say those things to me and I just then go with the flow and it's worked out well. Like, and it does flow. But yeah, you're very much like go with the flow yeah everything's gonna be okay yeah like and that's a very difficult energy to be around sometimes it can be very triggering yeah because that in and i mean i have you might not have yeah so you might be thinking well that's irresponsible or possibly not but anyone could so I would say in the past people and I think me a couple of years ago probably would have yeah but I definitely

think now I have learned so much from you and even yeah the own work that I've done like I have learned to not think like that yeah and just like I am slowly going on a journey of trying to become a bit more like that yeah and good yeah it's nice isn't it yeah really nice yeah it is nice it is like we're here to have a good time yeah like and I think that you know when when I trigger people with that you know it used to really make me feel shame like I felt lazy I felt you know that I wasn't good enough like that was a really big thing like that really consumed me and it stopped me from you know believing in myself and that's why when I was saying the belief you had you know when people were saying those

things to me it knocked me yeah and then I was like hang on a minute yeah you know this is reset real life definitely you know I proved to myself that I was a hard worker before this and it wasn't good for me yeah so now I'm able to check in and if I'm saying to people sit with it I need to be sitting with it too yeah so I have to practice not I don't like to say preach but practice what I preach yeah so I have to take that time and I have to reflect and I have to take that time and I have to reflect and I have to sit with things and I have to look at when I'm triggered and why I'm triggered yeah you know and I I get triggered when people talk about money and I'm like oh and then I'm

like okay sit with that yeah why yeah why am I feeling that way do you want that money yeah do you want to be able to talk about money like that? Like, why are you triggered? Yeah. So it wasn't necessarily judgment. It was a trigger. And then I sit with it and I work it out. You unpack it and then you realise. Where does this come from? It comes from the fact that, you know, nowadays, you know, especially in sort of the coaching, mentoring world,

a lot of people talk about money. And I'm still unravellinging it but it kind of made me really uncomfortable yeah and I just had to sit and yeah I'm a bit like that as well I would say I think it's quite a British thing as well but it's this kind of and again that's conditioning like yeah so I had to really explore it and then I was like but don't hold judgment yeah and I think that's what I had to do and I told the person and we laughed about it but you know it's that kind of thing but you know I I would say that I have time to do that yes I didn't yeah so that's kind of where it comes from so yeah spiritual holistic all these words it's just you just live in your best life oh babes I do I feel good you are yeah and I think I'm very curious

and very nosy yeah and I get to be curious and nosy and people choose that yeah and that's what's so magical about it um but many people that have seen my journey have really seen like that transformation oh I can imagine yeah and it's funny because the perception you have of me others have now yeah and I've not caught up with that perception yeah so I've had to really go into that and dig into the perception of me now and not that it's about what others think but it's like okay you're you're comfortable you're good at this and yeah you're great at what you do but you know that's so like yeah but it's those things that you have to sort of explore and I was never really you know yeah this is just

one of those things that's become just I'm I have found me yeah that's nice and that's probably all I want well I know it's all I want for everybody it's all anybody wants yeah and I think it's a really difficult thing to do I think you have to really put a lot of time and effort into it to be able to do that um I don't think it's something that comes natural to many people yeah um yeah to figure out who you are and I feel triggered because I'm young yeah I think people I I have this thing and I'm working for at the moment so guys bear with me yeah um that people are like oh she's so young or I don't know maybe I'm not so young I don't know but I feel like

I have always been young with this work and everyone who's a peer is always older than me I've always been exactly the same yeah yeah it's like this thing of that I've had to unravel and work through and I'm still working through it yeah because when someone comes to me and they're like in their 50s I'm like why are you working with me I don't say that to them I'm thinking it you're thinking and that's you know a form of self-sabotage yeah and I will happily share all the things I'm working through because I'm always working through stuff like I'm not fixed I am not like this like elite healed human I'm really not like I am work in progress and I believe you are always your whole life yeah 100 the minute you stop thinking that yeah you're you're silly yeah definitely so I'm willing to be really vulnerable and share that and I think a lot

of people probably don't know so much about my faults because I know more about yours yeah because when people are coming to see you they're talking about themselves yeah they're not asking the questions yeah so yeah so I think that's where I'm yeah where I'm at so I'm really excited to just work through all of this with you and I feel like this is going to be a bit like therapy yeah I think so too and I think we're going to make it fun like we're going to have so much fun I mean we don't know what this is going to be called. We have, I have goals as to like how this is going to look. We need some goals. You just work on them and I'll just see.

As to how we want it to be. But I'm very excited. I love that you've shared your story with us. So I really appreciate that. And I love your story as to how you've shared your story with us so I really appreciate that and I love your story as to how you've got to where you are and just generally to see that you went from a place of feeling so down yeah and to be where you are now it's just so transformative but also so inspirational for a lot of people who'll be listening to this and maybe feel like that

you know to know that they could also get to this point so or will get to this point yeah with that work that they can put in anyone that's feeling like that please just ask for help yeah always always ask for help that's why I wanted to ask you about the therapy thing yeah because a lot of people I think I think everybody needs therapy but you don't need it but don't necessarily oh it's scary make that you know make that choice to go for therapy. Totally. And it's great that you did do that. Yeah.

It's really great that you did do that. Well, I feel like I had to make a public announcement that I was in therapy. Yeah, I bet. Which you don't at all. And so I think that was, yeah, definitely the first time I asked for help. And now I ask for a lot of help.

I'm the same. And it's great. I ask for so much help. I'm not a and now I ask for a lot of help I'm the same and it's great for so much I'm not a hero I'm not a martyr like I I asked for help and I think accept the help yeah take it on yeah so that's definitely yeah yeah but no so thank you for letting me share my story oh I've loved listening I've never actually spoken about my story before so it's actually really lovely to reflect and take that time. And I'm really excited for what this is going to be. And I know this is going to be great.

And I think really the next visions and feelings I have is, you know, we're going through lots of different things and we can bring it up and talk about it. I feel like we've spoke a lot about friendships. I'm single and dating, is you know I think there'll be lots of people that will be interested to understand about that side of things you know you're obviously going through you know about to become a mum and all this sort of stuff so there's so many topics that we are going through right now and we're both in our Saturn's return I think we could maybe talk about that possibly in the next few episodes yeah definitely um explain what that is yeah and have some fun yeah so now we've gone deep like and we like that we like the we started off quite deep but we want you to know

us and yeah we wanted you to really get to know us and to know exactly who we are what brought us here today yeah and um yeah at least we've had that introduction now and then yeah then we're gonna we're just gonna flow oh it's gonna be amazing yeah drink wine yeah for you oh yeah well we won't be long not long yeah yeah so thank you for listening thank you so much for listening to that episode i am sure that you absolutely loved getting to know Jess as much as I did our next episodes are going to be a little bit more topic focused and something quite different to what you've just heard today don't forget to like and subscribe to this episode and the podcast you can also find us on Instagram Jess is at Jessicaie underscore holistic and I am at hair by Samantha Green. Thank you again

so much for listening and we look forward to seeing you in the next episode.