Spitballers Comedy Podcast - 43: Silent But Deadly & The Best Movie Franchises - Spitballers Funny Podcast

Episode Date: April 15, 2019

Come hang out and chat with the guys today at 6:00pm ET during our YouTube Premiere party! We have a great show this week in which Mike throws several of his unsuspecting family members under the bus. Not out of the ordinary, we also bring you some excellent advice on farting in public and awkward bathroom attendants. Then, Andy, Mike, and Jason question if there are people that genuinely enjoy running or if they are all just compensating for overpriced running shoes. No episode is complete without a nail-biting draft so we conclude this episode by picking the greatest movie franchises. Make sure you subscribe and tell your friends about the Spitballers Comedy Podcast!   Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Instagram Subscribe on YouTube Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/spitballers/posts See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, Spitwads, do you enjoy this show and you want just a little bit more? I do. Oh, there you are. I love this show, yes. Oh, that's not annoying at all. Head over to SpitballersPod.com and find out how you can become an official supporter of this show and get access to the complete archive. Spitballerspod.com.

What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the Spitballers Podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason. That was for Jason. I know Jason likes that Louie. Yes, it's a wonderful world. When we start an episode of the show, it's always better that there's a little uncertainty about

who's going to scat their way into the show. Yes. Sorry. What was that? We're 10 seconds in, Jason. Look, last episode. Was that a scat reference? Yes, last episode ruined me forever.

Now forever I'm... If you hear the word scat, it's cat scat. It's animal scat. Thanks. Yep, you did this. Welcome into the Spitballers podcast. Welcome into the YouTube debut of the show. So if you've been listening, now you can watch.

That's really what it means. And it's spectacular. I mean, the set looks great. You can't see Al Borland, which is crucial to watchability. I have watched every show we have recorded. Even before we were on YouTube, I was watching. Yeah, you could see them and you said, this needs to go public. The biggest problem with

the way that I would watch our show, though, is I couldn't see me. Right. That's a big problem for you. We know that. So, I said, let's get this bad dog up on YouTube. Normally, when you see yourself in a mirror, you... Ooh. Hey, what? Whoa. Hello there. Where did you come from? You got the hair

nice and tight. This must be a tough week for you in terms of leaving the mirror. Well, it's always tough, but you are right. It's a little bit tougher right now. Go live my everyday life or stay here and observe the majesty. Alright, we have a great show for you today.

Welcome to everybody watching on YouTube. If you're listening in the morning on the podcast, you can actually go and join us in the premiere of the video event that is at 6 Eastern. YouTube.com slash Spitballers. YouTube.com slash Spitballers. And here's the thing.

We want to hear from you. We want you to go in there we want you to leave a comment and you've got two options on the comment okay you can either tell us because we've got a great draft on the show today yeah one of the best we're drafting the best movie franchises so i either want you to put in your perfect draft or better yet give us an idea for future drafts on this show because these are fun. These are great, but we're always looking for ideas. We were so close to doing an ice cream draft today. Yeah, I know you're disappointed, Andy.

Now, that kind of draft, you eat the ice cream during the draft, right? Right. We're going to bring all the ice cream together, put it all out. I'm taking Rocky Road. And then you draft by grabbing. Yes, and eating, obviously, a pint of each. Right. No, we thought because you have the third pick in today and eating, obviously, a pint of each. Right. To solidify the draft pick.

You have the third pick in today's draft. It would not be fair. I deserve. You deserve the one-on-one if it's an ice cream draft. I don't even know if I want that in an ice cream draft. Of course. Or a labine. No, stop it.

Oh, stop. I would not go. Maybe French vanilla. Do you guys like the French vanilla or the regular? I don't know. Give me the French. Really? I honestly don't know. Give me the French. Really?

I honestly don't know the difference. Yeah, that's a bad decision. You guys are going to get blown away in this draft based on that. So what else is going on? We got Would You Rather on the show today. We got Life Advice. And we got the Best Movie Franchises draft. Here's what else you can do. You can head over to Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts,

and you can subscribe to the show and leave us a review because we read those reviews. And by we, I mean Jason. We reveal the review. We reveal and read. That's what you were going to say. Thank you, Mike. On the show. Review-a-saurus Rex.

This one comes in from Zaminaho. That was nice. Thank you. I think you said that correctly. Oh, incredible. A podcast of historic significance. Five stars. It can only be said of a handful of events over the course of history that they truly shaped the human experience and altered the evolution of our society.

The control of fire, the invention of the wheel, printing, press, antibiotics, etc. Those sound important. This podcast is not one of those things. That being said, Andy, Mike, and Jason are incredibly funny, relentlessly entertaining, and may possibly have the best chemistry I've ever experienced on a podcast. One of the best moments of my week is when I get the notification that a new episode is available. Six stars out of five. That is more than you're even allowed to give, and we appreciate that.

Also, bonjour, because this fine listener of the show. Oh, I did not see that. Coming in from Israel. Ah. International. Bonjour, for sure. We do appreciate each and every one of your reviews, all the support we get on Twitter at SpitballersPod.

You guys are why we're here now on YouTube. This is show, what, 40-something? Yep. 40 more than I thought that we'd get to. So we appreciate it. I'm glad that you enjoy the show. I'm glad you guys are making it a part of your week. And let's get to. So we appreciate it. I'm glad that you enjoy the show. I'm glad you guys are making it a part of your week. And let's get to it.

Would you rather. All right, let's start with this would you rather question. Would you rather have to run two miles to work every day or drive 1.5 hours to work every day? So you are going long commute or you're going two miles. I have two immediate questions. Number one, this question is phrased, would you rather run? Do I always have to run? Oh, because you're thinking you're going to walk.

Well, I could walk, or as we talked about last week, my skipping is legit and out of control. If you walk, it might be 1.5-hour walk. That's the problem. Well, this was what I was going to say. It's the same length. Oh, yes. For me, this is basically saying, would you like a one and a half hour commute where you have to sweat, or would you like a one and a half hour commute in the AC with a podcast

playing? Because there's no way. Running two miles right now, what is the time on that? Jason, you can listen to podcasts while you walk around. It does say you have to run. So, Mike, you're having to run this two miles. Question number two. Okay. Is there a

shower of any kind at work? Or is it simply the sink bath? I think you gotta start your job. I think you gotta start the day off. You get right in and you go. You gotta get right in. Oh, man. Can you run... Can you get a prescription so that you can run without sweating is there

some sort of yeah mitchum i don't think you'd want to do that no i feel like you would die have you seen there's like super strength uh deodorant that like oh that has a side effect essentially no like what it does is over time like seals your sweat glands off oh stop it stop it oh it happens and uh because there's some people uh shout out to he's not gonna like it but shout out to my brother-in-law who's got the sweatiest pits i've ever seen in my life he's not gonna like it no i wouldn't And you know me, so that's really bad. Yes. And so I've learned a thing or two about the deodorant game from him.

But I would think that if you just cover your entire body in this, eventually you won't sweat. I don't know what the ramifications of that. I feel like what happens is you would swell up like you know violet in charlie the chocolate factory she just swell i mean all your sweat you're what you're just storing it you just it's inside the skin here's the thing and i saw my wife and i just were watching shark tank or something there's a commercial that came up for a prescription wipe for heavy sweaters and i told her a Yes, it's a wipe and you put it, it's like one of those commercials

where there's 30 side effects at the end of the thing where it's like, what? You may also, you know, hot dog fingers and cancer and all these other things that could happen.

It's not just a baby wipe that has extra No, no, no. fragrance soap on it. It is a prescription and I thought to myself, at first, I thought it was funny.

Like, why would you take, why would you risk all these side effects to stop sweating? But then I was talking to my wife. I'm like, if you sweated a lot, it would suck. I mean, that would be the worst. Like, that's a real problem. Thank you. So your brother-in-law is saying.

I got to let him know about this. On the bright side. On the bright side. Look, because I. So it's the sweat, the detail. Like, you don't. Because you'll get to work... Let's say you run a 15-minute mile.

You're going to get to work in 30 minutes running. A 15... You can walk a 15-minute mile. Okay, so I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt. Andy, how fast do you run a mile? Probably like... I don't know. Probably like 10 minutes.

Okay. Yeah. All right. But I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt there. Also, this is... Let's just... You're in an office job, so that means you're running with a backpack on because it's got – You take your backpack to your job? You have to change your clothes, man. Oh.

You're not running to work in your suit. But that's what we said. You get to work. You've got to start your job. So I have to wear the suit and the dress shoes. I kind of like the idea that Mike is bathing with baby wipes every single day. One whole container of baby wipes at his death. I'll just buy a lot of stock.

Who makes the best baby wipes? All right, let's flip it the other way. 1.5 hours to work. That's not fun. That's not an excessive insane commute. People do it. It's kind of rough. kind of, it's rough. And driving, it's proven.

Borland, I don't know if you knew this. They've done studies. Your cortisol levels, which is your stress hormones, those have been, they've studied this. And they say the longer the commute is, the proportional amount of stress hormone is released in your body. Because I remember this. I used to work really far from home and i would leave work in the best mood of my life and when i pulled in you better hide hide the kids hide the wife it's because you get stressed totally yeah totally you get stressed

running miles no it doesn't that give you endorphins isn't it isn't it supposed to see here's the thing like i struggle with eating and weight mostly because of eating but if i had to run to work if i had to run i would be in great shape yeah this is the thing like i've been working out with a trainer for you know a year now and i feel like if i quit paying for a trainer and just ran like i'd probably lose more weight but running is the worst the worst the worst me there are people out there that love running yeah there are i they call them runners oh i call them liars yes yes mike i love this why are they doing it then it's every time it's me time if every runner out there is a liar so under this pretense no runners actually enjoy what they're doing including the like the marathon runners oh correct so every runner hates running that's a fact so why are they running because they're stuck in their echo chamber of running

is good they talk to their friend and they're like, no, no, really, I like running. And you're like, oh, crap, I have to like running because this guy likes running. How many people out there are still running because they spent too much on running shoes? Oh, man, you go to a running shoe store? This is a true story. My wife and I went to a running shoe was like we wanted to get better shoes for our feet and those who wanted to become runners right well certainly not i don't hate myself and so you go in there and they're so nice and so helpful but they've got like this process

yeah where as soon as you start as soon as you say hello next thing you know your your shoes are off they're filming they're filming your walk and your feet as you move. So by the end, it's like, okay, here's your shoes. We literally never saw or heard a price until we were paying at the counter. And it was like, oh, okay. Do you finance? It was unbelievable. They've got that process down.

And then you wake up in the morning, and it's time to go to work, and you stare, and you've got, it's literally a bag of money sitting in your closet in two shoes, and you've got to wear it. I'll take the drive. I'm not even going to pretend I want to be in better shape. I just want to listen to podcasts and drive. So have you guys ever heard of this technique called chi running? No, I've never heard of chi running.

It sounds stupid. Is it where someone else runs for you because that sounds good no it's it's supposed to be a healthier technique for the running and help you go longer you get on a bicycle yes so and you run on that it's called chi running by harley davidson my uh my sister she frequently finds herself looking from like she's the perfect beach body customer okay there's a new product oh boom i'm gonna get you're just gonna call your whole family out on today's show look i didn't name names i just sent my sister yeah hey sis uh so she's like she does she wanted to do this instructor like there's an instructor that comes to your house oh no you so imagine

they don't give that price up front either. Imagine the running store where they film you, but it's like an hour. And you look so awkward because the entire technique is you've got to lean forward. And that's what's driving the momentum is you lean over your legs. Did it stick? Is she a cheat runner? Oh, no. Oh, goodness. It's a cheat runner? Oh, no. Oh, goodness.

It's a fake thing. Goodness, no. Because at the end, it's still running. But three of her friends are cheat runners, and three of her friends' friends are cheat runners. It's just a big pyramid scheme. Yeah. I'm going to do the thing where I take out a loan,

I get a Tesla, I shove an orange in the wheel for the auto-drive mode so it thinks I'm holding on. I take a one- a half hour nap and I am refreshed when I get to work. Would you rather? Here's another would you rather question. This is Jason's last podcast. Would you rather take a year off

of your job at full pay or work your job for the next year at double your salary? So you've got this opportunity. This is hypothetical. Anybody out there doing your job, you want the year off at full pay. So it's a year's paid vacation.

That sounds pretty nice. Or you've got the chance to double up. Now, theoretically, if you double up, you can then take the next year off. But then you had to do it. Then you had to do the double work. So if you really want the year off, you might as well just get the year off. But then you had to do it. Then you had to do the double work. So if you really want the year off, you might as well just get the year off.

Well, you're not doubling your workload. You're just doubling your salary. Right. You're doing the same work. No, you're doubling your workload if you wanted a year off in that situation. I was saying you could just take the double money and then pay for the next year's worth of lunch.

But you've had to do a year of double work, so it's better to just take the year off. But you don't do a year of double work. Right? Am I missing something? I am. Gotcha. But you've had to do a year of double work, so it's better to just take the job. But you don't do a year of double work. Right? Am I missing something? I am. I'm going to stop talking.

You just do the year. What I'm saying is. Okay. Help me track. E equals MC. If you do the job and you get double pay. Hold on. Oh, you don't get double work. There you go.

Okay. So it wasn't both of us. Andy's looking at us like we're not getting it. You just get double pay. A lot of the time Andy talks and I'm just like, yeah, totally. Thanks. Yeah. No, I just always assume that I miss everything.

Like, this is how I live. I walk through life like this. Every moment I just assume, oh, yeah, I didn't get that. It is the test. We run it up the flagpole where Jason's like, I don't get it. Let me check in with Mike. Mike, do you get it? Man, we're not sure.

Okay, Andy. Look, first time for everything. I missed the mark on that one. So where do you lean? Do you want the year off? Look, I don't want to say this about myself. It's not a good thing. I'm certainly not proud of it at all.

I am so lazy. i like i am very lazy a year off paid sounds pretty nice so then with that laziness you wouldn't actually take it full advantage of this year where you could go you could see the world because you're making money no no you't understand. I would take full advantage of this year by doing nothing. I would probably. His shirt says churros, churros, churros, churros on it. Yes, that's true. I would probably not ever leave. I would like the first week we'd go and do something and then I'd be like, I live in this home.

I would do far less in my life that year off. So I can rephrase the question. Would you rather take a year off to become morbidly obese... Yeah, double your weight. ...or double your salary? Double your weight or double your... Here's the actual truth. Double your weight or double your money.

And you're leaning... Are you leaning towards doubling the weight? Here's the truth, all jokes aside. Sometimes, when you have like a week off, by the end of that week, I'm really ready to go back to work. It's like I love my family. I love my kids. I love my wife.

We've got – everything is great. But harder work at home. Yes, it is harder work at home. It really is. And so it's like, yeah, I'm going to go – I mean, see, and I think we're made to work. You know what I mean? Like, I think that's a part of our nature. Yes, I agree.

We are most happy when we are working and doing things for other people and serving the world. Oh, I've got my answer. Oh, dear. Oh, I've got my answer. No, dear. I just realized I am going to take the year off with pay, but I am going to head to work. I'm going to work, but while I'm there, I'm doing nothing. I'm in the break room.

Oh, because you want the routine. I don't want to have to be like, hey, when you're home, can you do some laundry? You're just the guy loitering at the office. Yes. You brought your PlayStation. This is going to be a great year at work. Not working, but at work. Everyone's going to hate you by the end of that year. You'll be walking around going, so is that, you need anything off the printer?

That's a clear solution. You're welcome. If this happens to you, you now know what to do. Jason has been at the water cooler for 45 minutes. If you get the double pay, does it ruin work for you for the next 10 years? Because then you're just doing the same job. Because you said you're not doing double work. Right. You're going to do

the same job at half pay from what you got used to. Yeah, that would stink. Give me the year. Yeah, I'm going to take the year off. Give me the year. I'm going to go see the world. I'll see you guys in the break room. Alright, let's move on to some life advice. Spitballers to the rescue.

If you're just joining the show, one of the big keys, one of the big components is we, and you heard it from the first half of that review, we try to help people. We try to change your life one important question at a time. I thought you were going to say if you're just joining us,

you should go back to the beginning of the podcast. Right, you skipped the first few minutes. Why are you jumping in halfway through? That's a fair point. Fair point. You ready for some life advice? Yes. All right, this first question comes in from...

What's so funny mike i'm a i'm a grown-up child and it's funny to me oh because it came from silent but deadly yes that's the name of the person on the website and you you you laugh because that means a fart and you're into farts yes they're real funny i admit it i'm super into farts they're great so i feel like when i was growing up and this is a small detour oh my gosh your mug says i love to fart yes it does because guilty as charged oh this whole thing so before i get into the question from silent but this will you here's what i know about this that is small. You like the message of I love to fart on that mug more than you like the amount of ounces it holds. This little tiny thimble mug is not acceptable. I have begged forever.

Our Fantasy Footballers website, we've got swag and merch we sell. And one of our most popular things is a mug, is a Fantasy Footballers mug. Except it's a little tiny itty bitty baby mug. Nobody wants those anymore. It's an 8-ounce, 10-ounce mug. And you're like a 12-ounce mug or nothing. That's right. Unless itty bitty baby mug. Nobody wants those anymore. It's an 8 ounce, 10 ounce mug. And you're like a 12 ounce mug or nothing. That's right. Unless it says I love to fart.

I don't like that the mug's brown. Well, I mean, when in Rome. Here's the quick detour. I feel like when I was growing up, toilet humor. Like this show, let's just settle in here. Yeah. I mean, I had a- Call a spade a spade.

A good friend of mine, Paul, his two boys, they're huge fans of the Spitballers to the point where they annoy their parents by playing it on Google Play four times an episode. Nice. Appreciate the demo. Through the show. Thank you. To where they have to turn off their friend, Andy, talking. Now, first thing he says to me as he walks in the room when i see him this past

week is the the 10 year old goes did you ever get the pin out of the toilet yeah and so this show there is a solid ribbon of poop going through this show from the beginning poop jokes fart jokes it's a it's a silky brown ribbon. Question for you. When you were growing up, was the toilet humor acceptable? That's what I'm bringing up. Great. The point was, I feel like when I was brought up, it was frowned upon. Now, it's more frowned upon. Was it frowned upon by both mom and dad?

Not as much dad. Yeah. I just think that as parents so we've been moving away from manners for a while now i really agree our society has gotten better good no it's great our society is taking leaps and bounds and i'm so proud that today we can openly talk about potty humor now everybody finds it funny everybody on the earth even the people that are like stitching their mouth shut and not laughing on purpose inside they're going that's really funny because i poop too everybody poops yeah the it's not funny to my mom oh oh she's now we're under the mom yeah we got brother-in-law we got sister let's talk about the mom i figured it's it's it's time to bring it out no my mom is disapproving and both the wife and i were all about it so my my three children it is

very frequent the the potty humor the toilet humor and so when it comes out and my and my mom is around i can just see the look of disappointment. Because you raised them wrong. Because I'm like, yeah, that's funny. She just stares into my soul. I don't want my kid going to school and spending his day there making poop jokes. Right. There's a time and a place. There's a time and a place.

But the times and the places. Which is most time and places. The times and places have become more places and more times than they were when I was growing up. That was my point. But SilentButDeadly sent in a question. He says, I'm hanging out with my girlfriend and her family in their basement. Oh, my gosh. And had the urge to pass a little gas.

Happens to the best of us. I sneak off to a corner and let one rip, which, by the way. Okay. Pro move. Pro move, but I'm also picturing it being very obvious that he's going to this corner what's over here oh i love the luckily it was silent but it was also very deadly her family is now convinced that one of their dogs pooped in the basement and i am helping them look for it oh yes do i tell them I tell them the truth? Is he live tweeting this?

Or continue this unsuccessful quest. So he's now looking for the poop of a dog that he knows was his own silent fart in the corner of the trailer. Do you yell at this dog? No. Barkley! You can't yell at the dog until there's proof. But you already know there's not going to be proof. Well, that's right. You can't yell at him, until there's proof but you're trying to know there's not gonna be proof

well that's right you can't yell at him but just give him a stern look oh okay and then a little dog family is now look i just putting myself in his shoes first he's made up some dumb excuse to go to the corner oh you got some cobwebs over here do you then i really like this plant well did he make a mistake did he not stay in that corner long enough i mean i get it no you gotta get out of the corner are you kidding me wait the stink stinks or sticks yeah well i mean it's gonna trail a little my point is you don't you pull it back over when you walk over too soon you can't you can't cut the butt cheeks are not scissors they can't cut the same you're telling me can that be borland can you put that as the quote

of the show? That's my what I learned already. I'll just tell you right now. Butt cheeks aren't scissors. Look, I'm putting everything on to our good friend here, Silent But Deadly. As a professional, you got to know, when the tumbly is rumbling,

you know this one's going to be bad. You know what's about to happen. You know the deadly part's coming yes at least you should unless maybe you're gonna be surprised yeah there's always those surprising ones where you go oh yes where oh i am never surprised there are the time foods like the first time you've had a food and you you got the rumbly but you don't know that is the deadly oh all right you've got it you've got a sixth sense. I'm very in tune with my B.M. Can there be an app for this? Whoop, whoop, whoop.

What's that? You just rub it on your tummy? Yes. And it x-rays in? You rub it, and then it tells you, This is going to be a 7.5 on the stink-o-meter. I feel like it's going to have to be a post-fart, like, you know. Oh, no.

A breathalyzer type of thing? That's not helpful. It's just, get away get away i already know to get away because i have an app it's called my no you're standing in the corner holding your phone to your butt you're telling me that you have never farted and then gone oh this one's bad oh this one's bad because I'm sure you thought you had a six that turned into an eight. Oh, yeah, but I always know it's going to be over a five. I know what's the base level. So basically, you're saying SBD here should know if it's got the potential.

Yes. If it's got the potential, you hold it in. Okay, all right. I need to know this. Or go to the bathroom. Mike, you're the pro, it sounds like. Jason, you are more of like. How dare you?

Look, you're more experienced. He sounds like the professional. you are more of like. How dare you? Look, you're more experienced. He sounds like the professional. Still offended. Still offended. Offended for the dumbest reason anybody's ever been offended in their life. You've said a lot of mean things to me through our 700 plus shows. This is probably the most disrespectful to who I am. Here's the thing.

You are wearing an I love to fart or drinking from an I love to fart mug. But you can both answer this. you're already in the situation you've gone to the corner what do you do now you've gone to the corner you've let it release you now know now what do you do what is the proper action he didn't do the right thing he went back he now has a situation where they're all looking for an invisible poop that will not be there. What do you actually do? What is the right course of action? Once you have started the chase, it's done. Right. You're pot committed.

Yes. You are in on this. Pot committed? Yes. You are taking this to your grave. At this point, now that you've- Or are thousands of listeners. Right. But that's what I was going to bring bring up you are doing this wrong sbd you literally just been i hope that this gets back

to anyone out there if you're listening and you're like huh my boyfriend was over here and we were looking in the basement for for a dog poop and we never found it. That's your boyfriend who wrote in. Whoop, whoop, whoop. All right, Cole from the website has a question. It's a two-parter. When walking through a door, how close does the next person have to be in order for you to have to hold the door for them? Oh.

And then what is the best way to get out of a now I'm holding the door for everyone situation? Cole, I understand your plight. I've been in the awkward you're waiting too long for them to get there. Now you're putting pressure on them to speed up and get through the door. It's complex. There is no simple answer to this because there's a lot of math. A lot of variables.

A lot of math that's going in because you open the door. You have to look at the subject who's coming towards you you have to gauge how far away are they then you need to gauge what is the rate of speed that this person is actually moving age age age is a factor gender no no well i i'm gonna be honest with you height height is the chivalrous aspect of it. Oh, I see what you're saying. I'm saying it's going to be different. Like if it's a dad coming up.

Yeah. You're like, he's got this. Well, I'm more likely to hold it longer if I see a little old lady walking up. Sure. And I want to help her out. I got you. And I might stay there and hang around for five minutes while she gets through the door. Yeah, man, this is rough.

I hate being on the other side. I hate being the one that that's like i am way too far for you to hold this door i don't want to you want to wave them off i don't want to jog in no thank you go like sometimes i stop sometimes i'll like turn around like i lost my keys or something like you do not need to keep holding this door for me my shoes need to be tied. Now, would you ever be vindictive about that weight and then just go in the door next to them? Or just walk all the way up and open the next door? Maybe I've been doing it wrong. Instead of giving them the out and turning my back,

you just slow down. Oh, that'd be rough. And slowly walk to the door. You can't slow down. You've got to start a long conversation is what you've got to do. With the person in the door. You got to start a long conversation. That's what you got to do. With the person in the door? Yeah. What about the situation where you're stuck?

You held it for one, then it's two more, then it's three more. Then you're the door guy. Then it's like, you've got to find the man or woman willing to put their arm out and take the mantle. Take the responsibility of the next set of people. Generally, we live in a pretty good... We have a society here. And normally, there's one or two willing people. But I've been in that situation too where I'm like,

am I going to leave? At that point, you work there. At that point, you will greet them. You say, welcome to Macaroni Grill. Enjoy your stay. Because they're checking in. And you send a bill. You send a bill to Macaroni Grill. Enjoy your stay. And then you stay because they're checking in. And you send a bill. You send a bill to Macaroni Grill. Oh, put your hand out for a tip. Oh, that's the ticket.

Ooh. Yeah, no, that's not bad. Do people tip for door holding? Only if they're wearing a nice suit. So now we're going to every place in a suit. I need to know something. Because I barely ever experienced this and it's a detour.

But now that you brought up the tipping and the holding the door, what's with the bathroom attendant situation? Oh, no. It's the worst. How much time do we have? I feel like I've never, ever, like I didn't know this existed until a few years ago. Right. Like I was creeped out by it.

Because I went into a very small bathroom. Oh, was this Nashville? Yeah. Remember that one in Nashville? We were in a honk-a-tonk. Yes. And we went into a bathroom. And I thought this was just a weird stranger who was trying to, you know.

And for the listeners to set this up. Yeah, explain it all. So if you're used to the toilet, bathroom attendant, whatever, I don't know the official title, it's usually a more upscale place, and it's a large bathroom. He's got his own area. Yes. He or she.

Yeah. Well, yes. Generally speaking, it's a man in the men's bathroom. Yes, in each. Honestly, I might be happier if it was, like it would make it very clear that they're an employee. If it was a woman in there. Sure.

Behind, like, a counter. They need a name tag. Because that's what makes everything official. But for this bathroom. Does that make their hands clean? For this particular bathroom, this was a one urinal, one stall bathroom. This is not the location that needs an attendant. This is the kind of bathroom where

I hit the attendant with the door when I opened it. Yes. Right. Where you have to say excuse me when you're trying to get to the sink. He was kind of hiding behind the door. One of my greatest life accomplishments, I recently went to a show with the wife. We went and we saw a comedy show.

Every time I go, I know I got to get ready. I got to mentally prepare because they have the butt wipers. What? The toilet attendants. Sorry, me and our family, we call them the butt wipers. Well, hold on. It presumes a whole other activity. For the record, people listening, this is not one of their job descriptions.

This is a post-duty role. And what are they supposed to do? They're supposed to sell you mints? So what they do, yeah, and they put the soap in your hand. No, they don't. Oh, yeah. And they hand you a paper towel. So I go to the bathroom, and getting the soap is unavoidable

because he's like, if you don't offer your hands, he's going to shoot it right in your face. So you've got to take. You're getting soap on you. Like one dose of soap is coming on you no matter what. You're getting soap one way or the other. So I accept the soap. I go wash my hands.

I turn and he tries to give me the paper towel. I wave him off. What? And I go to the hand dryer. Oh, you're using the hand dryer right in front of him? Oh, yes. Did you keep staring at in front of him? Oh, yes. Did you keep staring at him? Give him the stare?

I'm like, you are darn right. I looked into his eyes. Did you try to put a quarter in the hand dryer to tip it? I said no, and I walked out. My chest was puffed up. I was the man of the hour. That is a job. Waved him off.

That is a job that we can get rid of. It just reminds me of somebody pumping your gas for you. Right. Which, by the way, did you know? I don't know. I would like that. That sounds pretty awesome. In Oregon, they still do that?

No, it just got changed. The law just got changed. Well, they just got changed, but people don't know how to pump their own gas in Oregon. How do you not know how to pump gas? They grew up in their whole life. Someone pumped their gas for them. I remember driving. It's like a complex machine.

I remember driving to Washington. i remember driving to washington i remember driving to washington i got out and started like doing my gas breaker yeah lawbreaker that's against the law it was and this was this was many years ago and i got like in trouble they're like what are you doing i'm like what are you doing you can't handle that sophisticated machinery yeah and so apparently i was like, I can't pump my gas here? There had to have been a class that you have to go in. It's like a food handler's card. That detoured a little bit, but you guys ready for some drafting?

Yes. The Spitballers Draft. All right, I mentioned it at the top of the show. Mike has the first pick in the draft. Yes, I do. Skibidabop. He also won last weekers draft. All right. I mentioned it at the top of the show. Mike has the first pick in the draft. Yes, I do. Skibidabop. He also won last week's draft. You can vote each and every week, generally on Tuesday on Twitter,

at SpittballersPod. But what I would say is, specifically for this week with the YouTube premiere, go leave a comment. Put in who you think won. Put in your perfect draft. And put in some draft ideas that we can do on future episodes of the show. YouTube.com slash spitballers. The best

movie franchises. It's a great draft. People are passionate about this. I love my movies. If we could go 12 rounds here, I would. The movies that you make, you're saying? No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No, I do not. No, no, no, no, no, no. Home movies. I was thinking home movies. I make no movies. But movie franchises, people get very heated. We've talked about it on the show. I'm not the hugest Marvel fan. Yeah.

But Mike has the first pick in the movie franchise. Now, we said you can't just say marvel yeah and for clarification you have to it's a franchise where so iron man would be a franchise i can't take all the marvel movies because then the draft will be done right i would get 98 of the vote right because it's the best it's very popular but we're starting it off and i'm taking the best and one of the most popular franchises of all time. I love it. We went through a lull.

I hear you out there, people. We had a three-movie lull, but we are back, and they are better than ever. Star Wars, baby. Me and the ghost of George Lucas. Wait, he's alive. Yeah, well, he's not doing them anymore. Oh, okay. I was just like, poor guy.

He doesn't own Star Wars anymore. R.I.P. Mr. Lucas. It was a good run. Oh, okay. I was just like, poor guy. He doesn't own Star Wars anymore. R.I.P. Mr. Lucas. Sorry, George. It was a good run. Sorry, George. So you've got Star Wars. Heck yes.

I get it. It makes sense. People are excited. They're passionate. Star Wars is... I love Star Wars. Now, do you like the new... Yes.

Like even like... Solo. Solo. Do you feel like it waters down the magnitude of those releases? Because they're kind of going Marvel Universe with the Star Wars Universe. They go one a year. Eventually it will.

There will be fatigue. What was the other one? What was the? The Rebel something. Wow, I can't even think of the name. A true fan there, Mike. Well, I don't say I'm diehard. I just love it.

I just want the boots. It was the prequel before they blew up the Death Star. It was them getting the Death Star plans. The Death Star is in all the movies, though, right? No, because it wasn't built yet. It's either stopping it from being built or you're blowing it up. And there's a new one. Yeah, and then

there's the upgraded 2.0. We've really run out of ideas here. What other... I got an idea. Bigger Death Star. People loved the first one. All right, so I am up. I'm on the clock. And look, Mike already laid out my pick for me.

He just doesn't realize it. He's like, if I could draft Marvel, I'd get 98% of the votes because I'd get all of them. Well, I can't draft Marvel, but I can sure draft the Avengers movie series, which has, I don't know, all of Marvel. Now, I don't get the Iron Man movies. No, you do not. But I get Robert Downey Jr.'s Iron Man. There's been three, right? Yes.

And then this was the fourth one. Yes. And it will break every record imaginable, including the votes on this poll. Come on, people. Oh, man. Give me the votes. Avengers. Wow.

I'm opting for votes. I'm glad you took Avengers. Thank you. Because you wouldn't have. I would have. Oh, against your character? Against my will. Now, they're fine, okay?

I love a lot of those movies. I love the Thor series. I love... Some superhero movies are great. Now, you have not... Guardians of the Galaxy 1, loved it. You have not actually seen The Last Avengers, which is probably the best Marvel movie to this point ever made.

That's true. So I'm not set up for success. But what I didn't want to have to do is draft it because I knew how powerful it would be in the victory column, and you've taken that away from me. Thank you. You are very welcome. But I get to draft two series now.

I'm going to write down the two you're going to draft. Okay. I would love it if you could predict my two series. I've got them, too. Was Butch Cassidy a—no, I'm just kidding. Here are the two. Now now you guys wrote them down number one I'm going to go with Lord of the Rings

I'm one for one I'm going to take the Lord of the Rings series one of the best ever made incredible epic tale on the basis of an incredible book and world the Lord of the Rings series dominated movie theaters for a long time see I'm glad you took that because. The Lord of the Rings series dominated movie theaters for a long time. See, I'm glad you took that because there

is Lord of the Meh. Oh, come on. Meh. Stop. I will not. Very good. They're alright. They're great. They're alright. The second series I'm going to take Um Just, oh Do you want to tell that story real quick?

Real real quick. I believe we've told that story. I? A spoiler? Real, real quick. I believe we've told that story. I think we have shared it, but someone told me that Frodo died as a spoiler to the movie when it was first coming out. So I watched the whole film knowing something that nobody else knew, waiting for it to happen, and it was not true. But that's a prank. I mean, that's right up your alley.

Oh, I loved it. April Fool's. Look how happy I still am. By the way, Frodo does die. So I've got Lord of the rings and then i'm gonna go for my second uh man it's just a matter of whether it will get back to me i don't think either of these ones that i want will get oh then i'm gonna be wrong harry potter oh what do we got we got two for two dang it those are the one look you you predicted it harry potter obviously

there's more than you know just one or two movies in that set, so it's nice. You've got the full, what, that's eight movies? Because part seven was a two-parter. It gets better as it goes on. But we're drafting a franchise. The lore of the books, the progressive improvement on the movies, in my opinion. I would have taken it.

A lot of people love every single one of the movies. I thought they just got better and better as time went on. But the Harry Potter series, absolutely love it. So we'll go Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. I know I would not have gotten Harry Potter on the way back. That is 100%. I mean, that was my pick. I was all excited to have the Avengers and Harry Potter.

See you later. I won, unfortunately. Well, now you've got to pivot. Now you've got to go somewhere else. See, I had two movie series written down that I thought for sure you were drafting because they're yours. Like, you love them as opposed to just. I know them both. Super popular.

I know them both. Right. I know them because I love them. Right. And if you bring them all the way back to me, maybe I'll take them both. Yeah. And I don't know if I will. They're in consideration for sure.

I'm kind of going between two, trying to figure what would get back to me and what would be more popular. I'm definitely between... All right. As you think about this, when you think of best movie franchises, do you think of it in terms of, like, obviously with Avengers,

you could go highest grossing, or do you think of it as, like, most revered or best reviewed by critics? Like, how are you thinking? Or most, like, iconic? I am thinking of it in terms of favorite. best reviewed by critics? Or most iconic? I am thinking of it in terms of favorite. Yeah, I'm going favorite. Which ones do I have?

So Mike, legitimately, of all the franchises, even you as a big Avengers Marvel fan, Star Wars is your favorite. Yeah. Okay. I didn't know you liked it that much. I did not know that. I'm also factoring in the Avengers.

There's three or four movies. I mean, Star Wars, I have a huge amount of movies I can watch. All with the Death Star. All right. I was deciding between two. One of them, they're not all home runs. So I'm going to avoid that one. Okay.

And I'm going to pivot to the other one. And it might surprise you guys. All right. I'm going to pivot to the other one. And it might surprise you guys. All right. If it's going to be so mad. But Toy Story has changed movies. Toy Story has changed. I was going to take it. Yeah.

If it came back, it was going to be mine, too. It made Pixar. It made computer animation. And each time a new one comes out, it's pretty much the new best animated movie of all time. If you are out there and you watch Toy Story 3 and you left that movie without your shirt soaked. You're a robot. Your shirt soaked? Are you sweating?

I am crying so much that my shirt could be ringed out into a bucket. I'm emptied of all tears. I'm so impressed that they make the next movie the best movie. Yeah. That's what's impressive about it. I mean, Toy Story 3 was a masterpiece. So, and I mean, Tim Allen? Come on. Yeah. And Tom Hanks.

Two of my favorites. The top four things I had written down were Avengers, Toy Story, Harry Potter, and Lord of the Rings. I like the order of that. They're gone in the top four picks. So, nice pick, and Lord of the Rings. I like the order of that. They're gone in the top four picks. Nice pick. Thank you. Good job.

Mike, we can only hope he destroys his picks on the way back. I will. I'm in a very tough spot. I agree with you. I think that those all were easy choices for Jason's poll. You're going Madagascar, aren't you? Now you have two picks. You have two picks.

I'm actually going Ice Age over Madagascar. Yeah, I'm back-to-back picks because I'm on the turn. Woof. This is a difficult one. Okay, I'm going to go with a series that it might surprise but this this series has turned into something that we never thought it could which is somehow one of the best franchises in history and one of the best action franchises in history i'm taking mission impossible oh okay it's it's written down on my list. It's

weird because do you guys remember the first Mission Impossible? Yes. I saw it in theaters a few times. Did you say awful? It was awesome. The second one was the John Woo one. Just the absurd awful movie. He tried

to ruin the franchise. That's the one that starts with him like climbing up the rock face with his long hair in the beginning yeah but but now like the last mission impossible was is fantastic that's the one with the helicopters at the end yeah yeah that was a good movie so i'm gonna jump into a superhero series here as well And this movie franchise bucks all trends because somehow the second movie is by far, by far the best movie in the trilogy. I'm taking Batman. I am bringing home.

Now, this is the. This is. Dark Knight series? Yeah. Well. Are you trying to get them all? I get them all because it's Batman. Now, if you get them all, you also get Clooney.

Yeah. No. Look. Do you want them all because it's Batman. Now, if you get them all, you also get Clooney. Yeah. No, look. Do you want them all? Yes. Do you want them all if it comes with Val Kilmer and Clooney? I want them all because I get the Dark Knight, but I also get the Tim Burton Batmans. You do. Yeah.

He's right behind us on set. Michael Keaton's back there hanging out. Just forget Batman Forever and Batman and there. Just forget Batman Forever. Batman and Robin. Just forget they ever existed. And you've got a really solid franchise. You don't want Alicia Silverstone? No, I don't either.

So you've got your whole team is done. What is your team? Oh, no. You have one more. I have one more pick. So far, though, I am Star Wars, Mission Impossible, and Batman. Okay. Jason, you're up. I have two that I. So far, though, I am Star Wars, Mission Impossible, and Batman. Okay. Jason, you're up.

I have two that I want to get to me, but three that I like, so I'm not feeling too bad. You'll have to decide whether you want to try to ruin my life or pick a great franchise. I'm going to pick a great franchise. It's really tough because there's just so many here that are both nostalgic and awesome. It's really tough because there's just so many here that are both nostalgic and awesome. It's really tough. I want to go with one that I enjoy more. However, it's a little older, a little bit outdated now, and there is a different one that I enjoy just about as much,

which had an awesome movie recently with one of my favorite actors continuing the series and i thought for sure you were going to take this andy the last time around jurassic park being around i know they haven't all been hits that's why i said i'm deciding between two your problem is does that count Jurassic World? Jurassic World was an awesome movie. It's a separate franchise. Yes, of course it includes it. Mike's trying to ruin it. Mr. I Get Clooney.

Yes, I get the Jurassic Park franchise. Now, see, Lost World is one of the worst movies. Oh, man. But it doesn't even pale to how bad Jurassic Park 3 was. But those are overshadowed by the giants. But Jurassic Park 1 and Jurassic World 1 were great. I get it. I love it.

Obviously, nostalgic. One of my favorite movies. Because it's on my list. We've got a Jurassic Park. We've got John Hammond on the front of the desk. SUV over there. So we're up to five Jurassic Park movies, right? Yeah.

And two of them are good. No of them are I think we're up to incredibly great so foul to I'll go with one of them is great one of them is pretty good and then the rest are I I'm a hundred percent agree with you the first one amazing Jurassic World pretty good yeah like a plus for Jurassic Park a B plus to a minus for Jurassic Park B plus to A minus

For Jurassic World Hearing Andy try to talk Jurassic Park down He's really sad Jurassic Park Andy knows it won Oscars For best pictures It won 36 Oscars that year Alright I get it Obviously Jason would have taken a Braveheart series

Had they made a sequel Just chop it into three movies and it's mine. I wouldn't use chop. Chop is not the word you want to use there. Spoiler, they could not. All right. Sequel! I'm so excited because I really wanted to round out my draft

with these next two. I have Lord of the Rings. I have Harry Potter. And now I'm going back in time a little bit. Yep. And so I'm taking the ever-infinite, rewatchable Back to the Future series. They are very rewatchable. In fact, while I was saying that,

Al Borland had already written down Back to the Future for me. Back to the Future, you can watch them all the time. When they're on TV, I have to watch it. Mike and I, we did the 20-year anniversary. They put out all three in succession in theaters together, and we went and watched it. I dressed up as Marty McFly. You sure did.

It was awesome. Back to the Future, I love it. I adore it. Nostalgia, all of that. And then I'm actually going to go with a movie series that is similar to the Jurassic Park situation. Oh, yeah, I know what you're taking.

But that, look, it's hard to... Look, Star Wars has some that aren't revered by everybody. Oh, yeah, there's three in the middle. Me some love Star Wars. So I'm going to actually go with one that... It's my Jurassic Park.

These are the two that I had. Yeah, it's Indiana Jones. Yep. And look, if you want to wipe out Batman and Robin, I'll happily wipe out the aliens of Indiana Jones 4 that doesn't even belong in this. Because to me, that first trilogy, and then there's the runty descendant.

That was an attempt to do a fourth movie. But Indiana Jones, The Last Crusade is one of the best movies ever made. Yes. So I'm going to go with the Indiana Jones series for the same reason I love Back to the Future. I love it. I have such a strange relationship with Indiana Jones. The actual guy? Yes.

Yeah. It's a strange one. He's actually your father. Me and Harrison. guy yes yeah it's a strange he's actually your father me and harrison uh because in my heart indiana jones is one of my favorite characters sure of all time i don't know if you realize they the movies are all up on netflix now all the indiana jones i did not and i just recently re-watched them and i know exactly where you're going i re-watched them and i went these movies are okay not the third one no the third last crusade is i agree with you when you watch the first one

you kind of go huh like the argument has always been the fourth one is an abomination to the series and i went and i'm watching raiders of the lost ark and temple of doom and going you know this movies are just like like, I can watch them. They're enjoyable. But I felt a weight of sadness. Because they weren't as good as you thought. Exactly. They're not as good as I remember. I'm not even going to argue that point.

That's true. I think the power, now, obviously, when they were coming out, the power of Harrison Ford drove them all the way to a third movie. And then that one was absolutely outstanding. So I feel like part of it is a character vote. Ford drove them all the way to a third movie, and then that one was absolutely outstanding. So I feel like part of it is a character vote. Part of it is the character or the actor. Harrison Ford is so great.

So, yeah, I feel comfy with that. I mean, when you think of best movie franchises, you still think of Indiana Jones. Yes, you do. I won't disagree. All right. We've got one pick left for Jason, who has Avengers, Toy Story, and Jurassic Park, which is really a great team. I would actually like two picks.

I'm sorry. I would put in a formal request to Mr. Borland that I be allowed two picks. Mr. Borland, thoughts on that? Denied. Worth the shot. He didn't even think about it. It was worth the shot. Oh, yeah.

I'm really proud of myself. Can't get what you don't ask for. No, that's true. Squeaky wheel. It was worth the shot. I'm really proud of myself. Can't get what you don't ask for. No, that's true. Squeaky wheel. So here's the deal. Squeaky cheater. I'm actually looking at my roster that's not dominant. It's really good. And I'm looking at Mike's team and he's got two different kind of franchise types

that I want a piece of that I don't have. And I'm trying to decide which one. Do I go towards the action movies that you've got? You've got the action series. Do I go to the stars? Do I go that direction? I see what you're saying. You're going to grab the inferior one.

Well, right. No, and I agree. I mean, certainly votes-wise it is. I would guess you've seen 10% of those. Oh, no. 100% of those. Really? 100%.

You're a Trekkie? Even to the old ones. I actually think Star Trek is. You're talking about the originals. Yes, I'm talking about the originals, but the new ones I love. Where they save the whales? Yes. Oh, and they go back in time.

Look, those are actually great. I am shocked. You're shocked that I've seen them? I am shocked that you've seen them. I am shocked that you like them. Oh, Star Trek is a great product. Next thing you know, I'm going to find out you're a big Beatles fan. So here's what's crazy. Get out of here. Here's

what's crazy. I really do love Star Trek. Okay. I really do, but I'm not going to take it. Instead, I'm going to take a franchise I don't like. I'm going for votes. You're going for votes. I'm going for votes. I don't care. I am not happy. I'm going to take a franchise I don't like. I'm going for votes. I'm going for votes. I don't care.

I am not happy. I'm taking franchises that are my favorites. Jason Moore 10 minutes ago. That's a solid. Can you guilt him into changing? Nope. You can't because my favorite is winning. Oh, no.

And look, they're super popular. You're not going to guess this. Okay. They're super duper popular. I know what it is. They're always getting made. I know what it is. There's a hundred of them.

Yes, it is. It is the Fast and the Furious franchise. Give me all the action in the world. And look, I don't know. He has his head over his face and just he's just disappointed i'm just disappointed i've let dad down a little bit look those are huge monstrous movies and and everybody look and when you say movies that's a plural and you really mean a plural with these oh there's what nine of them nine soon to be a 100 yeah they're infinite money printers yes that is for sure i thought about

medea the but you know all right all right i just watched this is no joke i just watched um medea the the big family reunion like two nights ago unbelievably funny really? it was so like I totally get the character now I had never watched one so good no joke alright Mike

you get to finish up I feel like after that talk I gotta take Ernest oh my gosh that would put wait Andy are you done? do you have all four?

yeah I have Lord of the Rings Harry Potter Back to the Future and Indiana Jones you can't hurt him by taking Ernest anymore no that's I assume you're a giant Wait, Andy, are you done? Do you have all four? Yeah, I have Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Back to the Future, and Indiana Jones. You can't hurt him by taking Ernest anymore. No, that's... I assume you're a giant Ernest fan. I am not.

Hey, Vern. No. Really? You're not? Never even seen him. I saw... I wasn't allowed. You weren't allowed to see Ernest?

Isn't that like Ernest saves Christmas and all that? Yeah. Ernest scared stupid. That scared me stupid. That was going to be my story. My dad took me and the sister to see Ernest Scared Stupid, and I was terrified for weeks. So moral of the story here is Andy's parents were 100% right because that movie scarred both of us. And they're like, no, I don't want my kid to be in bed.

Ernest and Pee Wee Herman have the same time frame in my head, and I wasn't allowed to watch either. Both scared me to the end of the world. But Ernest goes to jail or goes to prison, and then he gets the superpowers at the end. Great movie. Great movie. Great character.

Let's wrap it up. Ernest it is. Oh, my goodness. So you're struggling here. I have like 20 left to draft. Yeah, but that's the problem. That is the problem. There's no obvious. There's so many that you could struggling here. I have like 20 left to draft. Yeah, but that's the problem. That is the problem. There's no obvious.

There's so many that you could go through. I already have. I trust that you'll make the wrong pick. I probably will. I already have the superhero, and there's another superhero franchise that I would love to get a piece of because there are 10 movies, including what I think is one of the best superhero movies. You should take it. That has been created. Or do I go like a Jason Moore there?

Or do I take the movie franchise that in my heart I should take because it involves my favorite movie of all time? You're not helping me out here, Jason. I'm encouraging you as a friend. I'm looking to you for guidance. I would take the one that your heart desires. Do you want dad to be proud of you, or do you want dad to be disappointed? Well, they're both good. Oh, gosh.

Oh, I know what you're going to take. I would choose one. You have to take that. I thought you were going to take that a round ago. Really? Yeah, it's your favorite. All right. I feel like Jason's going to win no matter what.

So I'm going to be a man of the people. I'm going to take the one that's in my heart. I'm going to take Die Hard. Yeah. Honestly, I thought you were going to take that last round just because you love Die Hard so much. Yes. Die Hard 1 is my favorite movie. Talk about rewatchable.

Okay. I can respect that. It's funny. When I think about Die Hard, I also think about Lethal Weapon series. Right. And the Lethal Weapon series. No. And the Lethal Weapon series. No, not that they're the same. I didn't say I think they're the same.

I said I think about it because they came out in the same time frames, and I love the Lethal Weapons. And then as soon as you're to Lethal Weapons, I'm like, okay, Beverly Hills Cop, which is awesome. Also, check this out. They're making a new one. Not surprised. I'm thrilled because Axel Foley.

They figured out a long time ago. It's actually titled Beverly Hills Cop 4. Eddie Murphy buys a yacht. That's the working title. What are the best ones undrafted here? The other one that I wanted to go with was X-Men. Of course. I knew that.

I thought you were going to go Godfather for votes. That's honestly what I thought you were going do uh yeah true story here crossed your mind no seen it no brooks is gonna be really mad i think i've never seen any of them so here's here's my story with that i've got a story too here's my story with the godfather series that so like i am very anti-old movies i just like uh what's the greatest movie ever made? Citizen Kane, piece of garbage. Oh, get out of here with that. Piece of garbage. Terrible movie. And I'm not allowed to say this. I was a theater major in college. You love Meryl Streep.

I know. So I have to love Meryl Streep. I have to love Citizen Kane. I have to love these classics, these ones that came before us that are, you know, whatever. So I never saw Godfather, any of them, because it was such a classic and i knew already i was gonna hate it i'm not a at this at this point i wasn't a huge gangster movie fan and i hated all old movies pretty much i had ever seen so i just refused and then i think it was like my third year in college i finally broke down i'm all right. I'll watch this stupid movie. It is awesome. Yeah. I mean, it's like, oh, yeah, this is The Godfather.

It's incredible. You watch them all? I watch the first and second. Yeah. I think some people stop there, don't they? Brooks is back there waving no. So back in the day, I don't know if you guys remember this, Netflix used to mail you DVDs.

Oh, yes. This was before the digital had taken over. So I had a huge list of movies that I'm going to work through them because they're classics. I just haven't seen them. I got to fill that culture void. Godfather was one of them. The DVD shows up at the house, and I look at the runtime,

and you go, holy crap. That's a large investment. So this thing sits on the counter. And sits on the counter. I paid for Netflix for two months. To rent one DVD? And then I never watched it. And I sent it back.

Because I knew I just would never sit down and watch it. It's hard to get over that hump and commit. Godfather, I've already given you $20. Yeah. I just haven't seen your movie. All right. Before we close out, two quick notes. Head over to youtube.com slash spitballer.

Subscribe. You can watch it on there. We appreciate all the support, the reviews. We're going to keep this thing going. We're going to make it better all the time. Also, what did you guys learn today? I learned that butt cheeks aren't scissors. I learned that Jason's favorite movie franchise is winning.

Oh, man. I learned that my bucket list item is going to work without working. That would be great. Things I'm not surprised for $500, Alex. Yes. Hey, we will catch you next time on the Spitballers Podcast. Thank you. Hey, tell your family, tell your friends.

Goodbye. Goodbye. Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast. To see what other nonsense the guys are up to, check out Spitballerspod.com. Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast. If you want to hear more, if you want access to the full archive, ad-free, go to spitballerspod.com. You can get all the information it takes to support this show.