Spitballers Comedy Podcast - 72: I’m So Rich and Fancy

Episode Date: November 11, 2019

The wheels fall off early on this episode. We start by diving deep into a strange flex from one of our listeners. Then we have some serious faux pas during a discussion on human anatomy. We revisit Jason’s presidential campaign as he decides who the best ‘running’ mate would be. We deep fry this episode with a draft of the ‘Best State Fair Foods’. Do not miss this funny show.   Connect with the show: Become an Official Spitwad! Visit us on the Web Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Instagram Subscribe on YouTube Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/spitballers/posts See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, spit wads, when you run out of this great show and you're like, I want more shows, you can get access to our entire archive at spitballerspod.com. You can become an official spit wad of our Patreon, have access to everything we've ever made ad free at spitballerspod.com. What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the Spitballers Podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason. I feel like you felt some pressure to add to what you had done. I was in the zone. I opened my eyes and I saw you also in the zone, but then your hand went up.

I kind of called for it. Your body needed more. I don't think I needed more. I got more. That's for sure. Welcome into the Smith Hall of Fame. That's my philosophy on life. You might not have needed it, but I'm giving it.

I liked it. It was kind of a volume crescendoing. Well, I went up. Yeah. The music goes down. Right. And we intersected in the middle, and now there'll be a baby somewhere. It's my turn next week to do the scat.

Yeah. Because if you're not aware, Spitwads, we basically cycle. Every week, whoever's got the first pick in the draft is responsible for the opening scat. And so next week, i will scat and i i'm telling you right now i'm thoroughly disappointed in my scatting i don't like it i don't like being the scatter i don't enjoy listening to my skin which means are you gonna work on it next week i'm bringing something new i'm bringing something different and i'm not and i am not saying it's gonna be good okay i just want that out it's going to be good. Okay? I just want that out.

It's going to be great. Don't put that on me, man. What's funny is I'm a little worried about where this can end up. No, I believe in Jason. I believe in Jay Moore. Thank you. We had to release a couple classic episodes, as the spit wads know, because of people being out of town, the plague hit most of the fantasy footballers

and their households, and we didn't always used to scat. That's true. And what I heard from the most were people like, you know, we enjoyed the classic episodes, but you guys need to like overdub some scatting on there. Oh, maybe that's what I'll do next week. Maybe next week my fire take will just be the intro and no scat. Wait and see. Check back next week.

He's going to try something new, which is being quiet. Nifty. I don't know that I can do that. All right. Welcome in. Would you rather? That's a great question. A great draft on the show today.

Follow us on, well, let's go with Twitter at SpitballersPod. Jason is at JasonFFL. Mike is at FFHitman. I'm at Andy Holloway. We're all also on Instagram. You can follow those handles at Instagram. And if you want, I've got a super important post coming up

real soon. Also, Apple Podcasts. We appreciate your reviews, your support over support over there in fact we even read them review asaurus rex this one comes in from joey roll potential medical hazard five stars what i actually read this one i know what this is gonna going to say. Don't even bother. I already know. Oh, okay. These three buffoons, as advertised, are ridiculously funny, perhaps too funny, as they will make you laugh at any moment, such as when I'm doing a bench press or running on a treadmill or using power tools.

Listen at your own risk of sounding like the joker and laughing randomly at any moment also jason moore 2020 the president america doesn't need but wants well of course you want me for president i have two reactions to this number one i feel like joey roll well thank you so much for the review was just weirdly flexing on himself. Right. He's pressed. I bet you I run. I use power tools. I'm a man. Watch out if you're listening to this while running a marathon, because sometimes in that 26th mile, I'm like,

they really made fun of me in boot camp. I like the idea of somebody going from all of their workouts just straight to power tools for no reason. Just like they keep them in the car. In between workouts, they use the power tools. You never know. He was trying to get Borland's attention. And it worked. Good job,

Jerry Roll. The second note was the perhaps too funny. Please tell my wife. That's good. Potential medical hazard is really one we didn't consider due to a lack of bench pressing. When I'm doing open heart surgery on a patient, sometimes I'm listening to this podcast, I'm like,

whoops, ha ha! I had to break out the who's gal. Sometimes when I'm flying my jet, and I'm like, oh no, I lost control of the wheel, because it's so funny. It's also the yoke, Jason, it's not the wheel. If you have listened to this show while doing heart surgery, let us know. It's also the yoke jason it's not the wheel if you oh yeah have listened to this show while doing heart surgery let us know called a yoke yeah you didn't know that no i had i i would have thought it was called the joystick or something i mean i'm thinking like if i do a

flight simulator i got a little joystick in my hand yes that's true because that's a flight simulator airplane parts take the yoke when you say airplane wheel it comes up with landing gear That's true because that's a flight simulator. Airplane wheel. Take the yolk. When you say airplane wheel, it comes up with landing gear, which makes sense because airplanes do, in fact, have a wheel. Several. But those are the wheels you're grabbing because you're so butch. Right. It's just I'm a man.

When I'm flying under the plane holding onto those wheels, I don't want to laugh. Don't listen to this podcast. We do get a lot of people dropping objects on themselves or laughing while they're driving. You're welcome. So whenever my chauffeur hears me laughing, he sometimes veers off the road. Oh, now he's a rich guy.

He asks, what's so funny back there? And I say, roll up the window. Mind your business, Jeeves. Well, I'm choking on my caviar, laughing. What happened to Joy Roll? I don't know why he's rich. Sometimes when I'm at the jewelry store, I'm like, have you heard this one? Would you rather?

I could have gone way longer. I could have beat that dead horse. She's trying to support the show. No, that's a projection by us on people that use their bodies to exercise. That's all that is. That's true. That's us saying we turned him into some sort of evil rich man. I love it.

For working out. All he did was work out and use tools. He's just a regular dude and we're not. So we're like, oh, well, aren't you fancy fixing things and working out? Try sitting down, talking into a microphone. I wish I was so rich that I could run outside with my legs. All right, Robert from Patreon has a would you rather question. Believe it or not, would you rather have an hour in each day Where the calories you eat don't count

So one hour This is like the purge movie Where you've got the one day a year You can do whatever you want Sort of but instead of cold blooded murder You're just eating cheeseburgers Murdering yourself But you're not

So wait would you rather have an hour each day where the calories you eat don't count? Okay. Or all of the exercise burns double the calories that it does right now. So you could have a window where you burn double calories. Okay. I'm definitely taking the cheat hour. I think I am too, man. I could get all of my indulgence into that hour.

No doubt about it. In fact, is it every day? Every day you get an hour, Mike. Okay. This is too easy. I'm reframing this question from Robert.

Would you rather have one hour a week? No, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, I want to reframe it differently first because I want to keep it as much as the same, but your hour is like one to two in the morning.

It's just, I'll still take it. It looks like I'm staying up late. I mean, I'm staying up late every night. If at 1 to 2 in the morning, I can eat anything I want. Do you know what is open at 1 to 2 in the morning? The foods that you can't eat.

It doesn't make you not have diet. The taco bell, the jack of the box. You're still going to have diarrhea. There's things you deal with. I mean, if it said, hey, you can eat anything. So now you're saying once a week? That's not good enough. I'm just saying.

To make it eat. Because we're all taking the food. That's true. This isn't the issue with the question. The issue with the question is not how do we make this worse. It's how do we make the other side better. Or all your exercise burns double calories. We don't exercise that much.

We just established that. That's because what's double of burning five calories? Exactly. But that's the problem. I only burn single calories. If I could burn double calories, perhaps. You would not work out. If you burned quadruple the calories, you would not work out.

You want to know why? Because working out sucks it's not because i don't finish my workout and go you know what that was only like 450 calories i burned if only i burned 900 i don't know what i burn in the first place what happens after the workout i go you know what sucked. I did not enjoy this. So there was a time where I was, this was my peak fitness. So this is a decade ago. This is forever ago.

But I was like six days a week. I worked out for an hour every single day. I mean, I was in incredible shape. And then Sunday was my cheat day. But my cheat day was unbelievable i it would start because we my wife and i would play church in the morning and sonic okay that sounds yeah we gotta we gotta we gotta dive in on that a little bit because like we played church like you play school sorry church in the mornings look in the biz, in the biz, when you're a musician- You be the preacher.

When you're a musician, you just say, we play this. Yeah. Okay. All right. No, that's why we- I'm sorry that you don't have talents. It sounds ridiculous. We play church.

We play like- We were trying to help you, Mike, and you've once again turned it on us. This is my philosophy. Okay. We have to be at church early in the morning because we're going to play music for the people. Sure, you're leading worship. Okay, so we have to be at church early in the morning because we're going to play music.

Sure, you're leading worship. Sonic, they offer breakfast in the morning, but they also offered lunch at like 6.30 in the morning. My day would start with a double cheeseburger, double bacon cheeseburger, a large fry, an extra large Coke, and a side of mozzarella sticks. That's how my day would start and so what was the verdict you had this i ate something bad every week and i worked out all the time oh it was it was great but i was also young yeah it's the age it has nothing to do with our workout i feel like if i worked out an hour a day every day i'd be fat i had this conversation with a fellow mid-30s man the other day and we just said that you transitioned from getting into shape into stopping a decline into just obesity.

Yeah. You're slowing down a bad thing instead of improving a good thing. You can't ever get better. It's just like I don't want to be worse. It's just how much time can it take for me to be wheeled around? It's just how much time can it take for me to be wheeled around? What sucks now is instead of the positive thing that comes out of the workout, it's like six-pack washboard abs.

And now it's just I don't have a heart attack for the next 10 years. Now it's my pants don't hurt when they're buttoned. I was like, I can wear pants. The benefit is just not worth it and you know i don't feel like i'm about to bleed from my waist belly button i say like your waist wait hold on hold on your waist belly is there more than one no but my i'm saying like my waistline underneath my belly button i don't know what that's called what's the center front of your waistline called your Your midsection? Well, that's a whole area.

I'm talking right where that button is. What is the anatomical name? I don't think it's that. That's a very different spot. I definitely don't think it's that, Andy. No? No. Your Goomba.

Sure, Goomba is better. But what is... Your Kerplunker. Is there an anatomical name? I mean, Spitwadsads if you're out there you're listening and you're a doctor clearly you are i mean you're all fancy and rich and exercising by the way if you're not please you're not allowed to listen to this this is only for rich people that's right that's how people find this they go well i've come into

a lot of money now what is the podcast you listen to, Jeeves? But my point is, I don't know. Podcasting for the rich. I don't know. We should change our name to that. I don't know what the name of the body part right behind the button on your pants is called, but that is what hurts on me a lot. So you're talking this is below the belly button.

Right. I can stand up. I can show you this. No, I mean, there's an area. There's an area. It's called the fupa. Is. I can stand up. I can show you this. No, I mean, there's an area. There's an area. It's called the fupa. Is that for real? Yeah.

Did you Google this? No, I know about it. It's not the gooch. It's not the gooch. Did you Google? No, but I'm learning. Yeah, kids don't Google these things. All right, so did you see it? The fupa.

Yeah. We're talking about the spare- Oh, goodness. I'm so sorry. Oh, goodness. Okey dokey. Oh, yes. Am I right? You're right.

That is correct. It is the food. But thank you, Mike, for being a rich listener. Which one are you taking? I'm going to take the I will eat whatever I want. I'm going to eat it at length for one hour every day. And you can take your exercise and calories back. What about you, Andy?

What are you taking? I'll take the hour of food. Okay, good. Borland. It's good to know that I didn't make the biggest mistake on the show today. You turned the air down in this room. Got it. I'm starting to sweat.

All right, moving on. I was going to give you a shout out. Apparently, I'm giving you a shout out now. Al Borland, I have seen pictures of you in your youth, and you were shredded. You looked like a Muscle and Fitness Magazine supermodel, other than the face. But your body was shredded what was that shot for you could have just called him a fitness model what was wrong with his face fitness models still have good faces mike what are you saying about his face i wanted to give

him a positive shout out you're you're welcome yeah thanks that felt really positive especially all the past tense associated with oh yeah sorry but hey i would hold on to that forever if that was me like there's no period in time where i was just jacked because it wasn't like thin and muscles show through you were like swole and jacked yeah to speak to your point earlier though you've been working out an hour for like a year and a half yes exactly what's what i mean no no offense no no offense i'm still fat what could it do so so i have been working out for two to three days i'm supposed to go three days a week but you but let's be honest. It's usually probably two and a half on average.

For a year and a half now, I've been consistently going. And I will say this. Here's what's changed. I mean, you're much stronger. I am much stronger. I can lift things easier. Peanut butter jars? My arms, I feel like I have muscles.

I remember six months in, leaning against my car window or whatever while i was driving and well not like lean but like my arm was up against the what the car window okay he's gonna talk about some droop and i know no it wasn't droop it was like oh what's that in between my arm and the door like there was something uncomfortable it was a tricep it was a muscle so that was cool but i'm still fat and that's that's upsetting because i'm just staving off i mean you're more staving yeah yeah and opening jars i think part of the problem and i know my trainer would agree with this is that over the last year and a half i've eaten like like i am a city dumpster i've eaten like put whatever you want in me. You don't need to sort this. You don't need to, you know, I'll take your recycle.

I'll take your garbage. I'll take your leftover. Just I'm a city dumpster. You think your trainer will agree with you on that one? I think that's part of my weight issue. But you fell into the trap of. You thought this hour existed every day for the last year. Just because.

It's called dinner. You're in your mid-30s, you have to watch what you eat, no matter what. Yes. Oh, goodness. Actually, the moment for me was when I got blood work done in my mid-30s and then he's like, it mattered.

You're almost a diabetic. He's like, you have cholesterol issues. And I'm like, no, no, no, no. I'm 12. No, sir, no, no. I'm 12. No, sir, you're 35. Do you drink butter? Well, yes. No, I eat.

Sir, how dare you? I eat butter. Tortilla chips for my healthy snack. Here's the crazy thing. So I'm out of shape. We all know this. No, you're not. You're actually in very good shape.

You're in the best shape of the three of us. Yeah. Well, I've got a big fat belly. Can we agree with that? You're a sturdy fellow. I'm a sturdy fellow. You're not. You're actually in very good shape. You're in pretty good shape. You're in the best shape of the three of us. Yeah. Well, I've got a big fat belly. Can we agree with that? You're a sturdy fellow. I'm a sturdy fellow. You're sturdy. But my blood work comes back, and it's always like healthy as a horse.

And I eat like trash, and I'm overweight, but my blood work is fine. So I'm like, do I really need to change anything? What has this episode become? I don't know, but it's very funny. Wait for this one to come back next time we're... Oh, man. I can finally see through my tears. Kyle wants to know something.

He sent us a question on the website. Hey, Kyle. Would you rather put on wet socks and brand new underwear every day or brand new socks and wet underwear every day? What? That's not a question. Some people have a real problem with wet underwear. Oh, this isn't. That's not a question. That's not.

Some people have a real problem with wet feet, though, which is why this question. Wet socks is out. So you would take wet underwear. There you go, Jay. What? Wet socks is out. Wet socks. No, no, no, no. Hold on.

I don't think you understand. Let me read the question. Okay. Let me hear. Would you rather put on wet socks, which is out? Like, you don't want that, and you get a new underwear every day yeah it's out okay or would you like to put on soggy wet underwear and have your groinal region be what is sopping wet and have dry feet but after the what has just uh commenced on this show with that laughter,

the underpants are kind of wet. So you're just saying you're used to it. But the dry... I will take... So here's... Wet feet is out. That's foot rot, man. Well, the other one is crotch rot.

No, no. No, because they will dry. But your socks, wet socks socks will not dry, ever. That's actually probably true. Why is that true? Because I think it is. Because of the shoe. You don't wear a shoe on your crotch.

I wear a shoe on my crotch shoe. God bless you. I don't wear, like I still have pants on. And so how does that, so you're telling me if my shoes were made of jeans part of it's the material right like socks are genuinely if my shoes were made of jeans my socks would dry if my shoulder yes denim socks no no he's saying if his shoes were made of jeans oh his socks would dry like i put a little get the train of thought your socks are made of genuinely like like a thicker material you want it to be cozy comfy cotton you're a lot of times underwear is

made of a very thin material that dries it out it's not because you're wearing denim that makes sense no that see that's the answer i was genuinely looking for i think that must be why because i i know experientially that you're right your underwear water goes down so like you're dripping out of your of your underwear but into your shoe i feel like you are a freaking scientist over there you are answering these questions so well in in discovering like the the mystery behind why socks don't dry but underwear do when whilst wearing what does it change did all that science make you want a wet crotch give me the wet crotch i'm on board you convinced me because one of those is going to dry and one of those won't and i have a bad way to

start your day every day knowing there's about a three four hour period of time at least but it's three it's not all day and we look over at Jason. Are you dry yet? No, I'm still wet down there. I hate wet clothes. I hate it. Like, some people don't like it. Some people are fine with it. I hate wet clothing.

I can't have a... I assume you never swim with a shirt on. Look, I am one... If you go to a water park and you go, that guy should wear a shirt. I'm okay with that. Maybe. But I'm just saying, I'm not one of those that's like, oh, I'm excited to get my shirt

off and rock my body. You know what I mean? I'm not that. Sure. But I will never go swimming with a shirt on. Because it doesn't feel good. I'm with you. I can't swim with a shirt on.

When I see other people with wet shirts, I feel gross. Yeah, we went to the water park. Yeah, the water park, and I had a wet shirt on. You grossed me out. Oh, I grossed you out. Yeah. Well, I mean, depending on the shirt. It's good for sun protection.

It's good for sun protection and saying, I don't want you to see anything on my body except for my nipples. Because these are showing through this wet shirt i think i wore a white one too it was a white shirt all right i guess you guys convinced me that that at the end of the day i'll have dry underwear and socks if i choose the wet underwear so we all chose wet underwear by process of incredible scientific analysis i am i am scarred by my modern American history class where we studied in-depth Vietnam. And it was like the most important thing. That's hyperbolic. But one of the most important things to those soldiers, dry socks.

100%. Because there's water everywhere. Otherwise, you end up with rotten feet. Yeah. What is that called? Foot rot. Is it really? I don't know.

Do they get gangrene from that? Yeah, you can. Yeah. Get scurvy. No, no, no. You can get gangrene. Okay. Everybody knows what that is.

I'm not going to explain it. That's when there's a lot of people and they're green. Last, would you rather. Would you rather start every statement with, hey, idiot, or end every statement with, just kidding. Oh, man. Trenchfoot. Yeah, there you go.

Trenchfoot is the. He lives up in the Canadian mountains, right? Or trenchfoot. I actually saw him once. I did. Carving things out of lumber. All right. What was the question? foot oh no i actually saw it once i did carving carving things out of lumber all right what was the question you either start every statement with hey idiot or end every statement with just

kidding which poses its i mean these both both pose itself like try proposing with either propose to your wife i could make the hey idiot proposal i could do that because you can you can lovingly so we're sarcastic people right like you know i call my kid fart face i don't even know their name is that sarcasm or just cruelty i don't know what are what are my kids names it doesn't matter right fart face is is all of their names and you know that's no different than i could i could see my daughter who i love and, and I'd say, hey, idiot. And she would know I love her from the bottom of my heart. And my boys, the same.

Traditionally, though, one sentence of your life, the one that begins the, will you marry me? I love you sentences. That might be the one that most women would omit it from the sarcasm. Hey, idiot. Is it better to be sarcastic with just kidding at the end? No. Let's just go through the proposal. Hey, idiot.

I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me? Yes, idiot. I will. That would be the response. Or I love you. You're the light of my life.

I want to marry you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. kidding wait are you are you really are you being serious no no i'm being serious just kidding you can wait i don't get it are you no no i love you with all my heart yes i do oh that's great just kidding well that yeah i mean you can't do the just kidding do you want to set a date yes i do just kidding just kidding because you can't do the just kidding. Do you want to set a date? Yes, I do. Just kidding. Just kidding. Because you can't ever undo it. You can't ever convince with a following sentence. Like, just kidding or just kidding. I don't know that anybody knows what's happening.

You would be called hey idiot soon if you chose the just kidding side. Just kidding. I mean, you couldn't do anything in life ending the sentence with just kidding. So we've decided that it's better. I'm sorry for your loss. Just kidding. Just kidding. Oof.

No thanks. I would much rather go up and say, hey, idiot. I'm sorry for your loss. I'm so sorry for your loss. That's not good. That's fine. It's not. It's not fine.

It's fine for me. Like, I feel like people that know me they would expect that they'd be they would give them comfort that in their time of need i would have the confidence in our friendship to say hey idiot idiot well no see you're right and you've you've spun this the right direction because like your wife knows you the problem here is that there are there's a category of acquaintance to stranger where the hey idiot may not be quite like you go to you're asking them to push number three in the elevator hey idiot can you get number three that's more or you're at the dmv hey idiot i need to get a new license yeah that's. You've got to have a certain level of charm.

You know what I mean? You've got to be able to walk in that elevator. So you've got to be handsome. Exactly. It's really hard to be a charming, ugly man. Like our listeners? Right. Very handsome.

Well, they're so rich that they don't care what the people think. You really need to be able to say both. Then you can get away with all of it. If you can say, hey, idiot, hand me that thing. Just kidding. But then you don't get the thing. I still want the thing. Hey, idiot, push three.

Just kidding. And then they don't do anything, and you call them. That's no solution. It's got to be, you got to be able to go, hey, idiot, just kidding. Can you push number three? That's true. That's how it works. Okay.

I think we're ready to move on. Just kidding. That's a great question. I'm really taking in the previous 27 minutes of this show. Yeah. Committing a lot of things to thought. That's a great question. Deleting things from memory.

Yeah, some important questions. Brian from the website says, what is one thing from your childhood that you loved to do, loved to do, but now as an adult you hate? So, for example, doing puzzles, rollerblading, maybe board games. Maybe it's reading. I don't know. But you loved it as a kid, but now you hate.

I'm not going to go as far as to say I hate it, but I find myself, and I don't like this about myself, but I find myself too impatient for most board games now. I don't actually like. What board games are you playing these days basically anyone where i have to learn the rules okay so a new game so a new game yeah you put me some chutes and ladders i could i could take that down but it's the startup process i'm no longer at like i to me playing a game means relaxing sure but now as an adult playing a game means learning a complex rule maybe it's because i have some friends that have that play more complex games maybe it's because i'm much dumber now see but

i don't like learning i don't like learning a complex set of rules to play a game. Because I like strategy in a game. And if you're learning how to play, it takes you like five games to strategize the game. I totally get that. I'm hyper competitive. I want to win at everything. I remember, I don't know, a couple years ago or something. I think you were there.

There was somebody's house. We went to a board game night, learned this new game, and everybody else knew it except my wife and I. So we're trying to get the deeper strategies of this game, but we got no chance to win. Right. This is our first time, but I'm not okay with that. I'm not okay just not winning.

Because that's not okay. Exactly. And I totally get this because as a youth, here's what I know. I'm going to learn this game, and it's okay because I'm going to play this, I don't know, 10 or 12,000 times over my next year. You've got all the time in the world. I've got time in the world. But this is all I'm doing on this Wednesday night or whatever it was, and I'm probably

never going to play it again. I think that's 100% what it is, is I feel like I can't be competitive. So I don't want to learn a new game. But then you get in a trap of not learning things. Interesting. My thing that I loved as a kid that I hate now is exercise. You loved exercise? I loved...

Like, put it this way. Well, like aerobics? No, no, no. I didn't do... Jazzercise? Jumping jacks were 275, 276. Come on, Keith, play with me. 277.

No. But I loved activity. I guess physical activity okay like that's fair die hard into basketball basketball was life you know that Andy I beat you every morning um and one-on-one and sports and and I mean I still love to play sports but everything else around it you know like I would run places for no I would just I mean, I still love to play sports, but everything else around it, you know, like I would run places for no, I would just, I would prefer to get over there. Exactly. I would prefer to run. I need to get over there.

I'd like to be there sooner. That's a nightmare. Like, and I think it's just a weight thing because if I right now weighed 155, that's what's on my license, by the way. I saw that today. Oh, I got to see what's on mine. That's what's on my license, by the way. I saw that today. Oh, I got to see what's on mine. That's not true. Mine's probably pretty close to there.

Let's see who's got the largest gap. I don't have my license on me. I'm curious what the largest gap is. Well, that gap, for what it's worth, I weigh 190. That's 155. I haven't had my license. So that's a 30. I'm pretty sure mine's right around where Amy's is.

A 35 gap. A 35 gap. All right. Well, what's your gap, Jay? I'm pretty sure mine's right around where Amy's is. A 35 gap. A 35 gap. All right, well... What's your gap, Jay? I got you beat. All right. Because my license says weight 205. And I am...

Well, I will say this. Usually, over the last year, I am 255. Yes. 55! Hit me with it. 55! I am 255 usually. People are so confused. All that being said, I am 255 usually. People are so confused.

All that being said, I am 245 right now. I've been eating healthy the last couple weeks. I'm down 10 pounds, so I'm 40 up over my license. Yeah, that's only five more than my gap. I'm coming for you. Well done. All right, where were we? Mike needs to say what is one thing from his childhood that he used to love to do, but now as an adult, he hates.

It's funny because saying something like rollerblading or roller skating, I can't say that I hate it because I haven't done that in 20 years. Have you rode a bike? I've ridden a bike a couple times. I wouldn't say I hate that. It was fun. It's not great. It's not great, Bob. It's not great, Bob.

I would say for me, and it's not so much that I hate it, it's just that the enjoyment you got as a child compared to being an adult, talk about a gap. It's very wide, but it's swimming. Really? Swimming as a child was the – we grew up in Arizona, so you're pretty limited on what you can do. Especially when we were growing up. In the summer without death, and it was swimming.

And you would wake up, and you would swim, not exaggerating, for eight, nine hours a day. Every day. I think you're exaggerating, but I get it. Not me. Not me. Most of the day. I would wake up at... This is a full-time job?

Yeah. I was a kid. I didn't have it. What child labor are you doing? Apparently, swimming is the child labor. I would wake up at 7, and we would go in. We'd swim before breakfast, come out, eat, play some Nintendo, swim until lunch, swim until dinner, play Nintendo.

Okay. I mean, it was outrageous how much I swam as a kid. Now, you're in the pool, and you're like, okay, what do I do now? I'm in the water, so it feels nice, but now what do I do? So here's the great... What do I do with my hands? Just splashing around. I'm not drowning, but it's just I don't have my kids' imagination anymore, so I just got to hang out.

I think that's the one thing that is excluded from my exercise issue. I love swimming now and the reason i love it now as much as i did as a kid is this reason when i was a kid i couldn't open my eyes underwater i still i still can't i just i don't i don't like it it hurts did you know they made a an invention so you can? So these goggles are the reason. That's what I'm getting to. You didn't have goggles? I didn't have goggles growing up, but I got goggles now, and it's amazing.

I'm living under the water. Your goggles have opened up your eyes. Goggles have opened up my eyes underwater. I can see legs and bottom of pool, and I don't know other things underwater. The only thing underwater are legs and the bottom of the pool. But I love it. I really do love swimming around. I'll go out late at night when my kids are in bed. Oh, we in arizona just doggy paddle around oh we've heard yes we've heard what happens late at night yeah it's it's good times i absolutely love swimming as an adult now and

maybe that's again because of my weight because i weigh less underwater are you buoyant i should go to space oh i would love space what would i weigh in space let me uh zero no not zero well like on the moon okay yes on the moon literally they call it weightless so you wait not that's So you weigh nothing. That's right. You weigh nothing. You weigh nothing in space. Okay. But on the moon. Yes. On the moon, you weigh something. Yeah, but on the moon, you'd weigh, I don't know, like 30 pounds or something. How much do I weigh in a weightless environment?

Okay. All right. Next great question. But do you... No, hold on. Okay, go on. Do you really weigh nothing? Because I still have mass.

It doesn't. There's no gravity pulling you down. There is no gravitational force anywhere. If you were in outer space, so for example, if you're in outer space and you push on a wall, you will forever move the opposite direction unless there is some other force that acts upon you because you weigh literally nothing but my issue here is with how we determine weight it's called gravity gravity is what determines weight you have to have that's my issue there is no gravity in space and therefore you do not i should weigh

whatever i weigh wherever i am because this is how much my body but you only weigh a beast based on the pressure downward on you that's why you weigh what you weigh on on the pressure downward on you. That's why you weigh what you weigh on something. Now, if you're saying, what is my physical mass? That is going to be measurable. My circumference, your circumference is everywhere. Let's say we're in space and we weigh nothing. All right. space and we weigh nothing all right i believe right or incorrectly that if we were to do the jumping jack motion it would take more energy for me to do that because i weigh more it would

because my arms are heavier but there's no gravity you're do you see what i'm saying no it's not really but it's not about weight it's about what energy it would take your body to actually do the motion. Because of the mass of my body. Because of the gravity pressing down based on the mass of your body. But there's no gravity. He's saying in space. Oh, in space? Yeah.

You don't have weight in space. It shouldn't matter. I don't think it should matter. So I'm just stronger then. I've got bigger muscles. Yes. Oh, I'm going out of space, man. I'm going to crush it there.

See you soon. All right. Since Jason has thrown... This is Jose. Jose from our Patreon, by the way. Oh, thank you for your support. Spitballerspod.com. Click the Become a Spitwad button.

Since Jason has thrown his hat into the presidential campaign ring, which one of you will be his running mate? Andy or Mike? We both have to make our cases. Oh, and then I get to pick. Yes. Oh, this is great. Okay, so I'm the running mate?

You're like the VP, right? Correct. My case is simple. Okay. You've known me for nearly 20 years. Yes. I think you know me to be the most responsible person or one of the top few in your life.

Certainly of this group, yes. So your financial situation, your forgetfulness problems, you're showing up on time, all solved. And you are my running mate. I mean, this, Mike, I don't know what you can... I know. Music. He can offer you music. Oh, we'd have a good time, Mike.

You would be a fun running mate. Now, let me ask you this, Jason. Okay. you're the president of the united states of course you're trying to get bogged down with financial reports and budgets i'm sure i can find an international democracy i am sure 100 sure that i can find other people to do that for me if i'm the president right i can find anyone out there to do it with me my issue is this is a running mate i'm not president yet unless this is like this is like i need a succession plan where i can yeah but what about that thing what about that thing andy did oh back in the that thing the skeleton that's now

that's my platform now if you need an actual running running mate oh yeah i could that's not me mike can do i can't run him no you can't no that's not true he Mike can do the running. I can run him. No, you can't. No, that's not true. He can't. Well, not in like a 40-yard dash, but in a 30 minutes. We're about to have a huge challenge. Oh, yeah. We're about to have a huge challenge. My running mate will be determined by whoever finishes

the marathon first. No, no, no. No, because he would be dead. Who can get the furthest in 30 minutes that's interesting that's interesting isn't that an interesting one because you can pace however you want yeah but it's just how far can you go 30 minutes in 30 minutes the problem with that is this if i mean you got to do it completely separate like blind test you guys can't go to the same place because that's interesting as soon as someone is out into a lead a little bit.

Yeah, it pushes you. You get the juice. But that's the competitive nature I'm relying on to beat Mike. I'm not worried about the juice of, oh, no, I've got to catch up. Once they're out too far, you go, all right, I'm not going to win. So then you're giving up. And that person's like, well, he's way back there. I'm just going to go at whatever pace he goes, and then you don't go as far as you want.

With a 30-minute race, that probably would happen for one of us. So I'm going to call for two separate 30-minute blind races. Winner is my VP. Wait, we have our eyes covered? No. How far can you get? How far can you get? Tripping, you're disqualified.

Interesting. It's an interesting challenge. But honestly, if I was running... I would pick Andy, too. I would pick Andy because my schedule would be tight. You know what I mean? Everything would be organized. I'm trying to be the president.

I'm not trying to do anything. Exactly. Yeah. You've got to vie for my role, Mike. Yes. Oh, my gosh. All right. Do you guys want to do a draft? Mm-hmm. The Spitballers Draft.

All right. Right now, actually, in our neck of the woods, the state fair is here. And this is a pop, you know, the state fair, county fair, whatever the case may be. You know. I'm told people like it. You know what a fair is.

And you go there and you give money in exchange for losing at games. A lot of money. And you give money for food and you give money for rides that may or may not be safe. And you also get in long lines and hopefully find your family after you get lost. So we are drafting today the best state fair foods. So best fair foods. Yes. The things that are known as fair fair.

There will be a lot of fried items. There will likely be only fried items. I can think of... Possibly, yeah. Now, are we going three rounds or four? We can try for four. I can think of one fair food that is not fried. Well, no, I guess a couple.

There's a handful. But, I mean, I don't know that we'll draft them. But then are they on the best? I don't know that we'll draft them. Yeah. Also, update update breaking news i would be 25 pounds on the moon or 1.7 stones oh i feel real good about my weight when i'm down at 1.7 not bad i weigh 1.7 uh mike is that i have the first pick and to me there is only... I guess if you weighed,

your mass wouldn't impact you as negatively if you technically weighed less in another place, right? Because if you had gained more weight, it's really the impact of that weight on your organs and your body and... Yeah, there's other... The gravity is what hurts. It's not just gravity, though, because there's fat cells that can

attach to your liver. Okay. Things like that. That sounds scary. Sorry. Back to the number one pick. Back to drafting foods. They call it fatty liver. There's only one number one pick to me, and it's funnel cake. It is. Funnel cake is outrageously delicious.

Which the truth is. Why is funnel cake not more places? Seriously, if it's this popular at the fair, go ahead and bring it out to my The truth is... Why is funnel cake not more places? Seriously. If it's this popular at the fair, go ahead and bring it out to my restaurant. The reality is funnel cake is okay. It's all right. Indian fried bread.

There's the same difference, really. And that's why I'm including it here. Because you get both. They're basically the same thing. It's basically a stretched out donut. Out of curiosity, since it's the number one pick, it deserves a little extra time in this draft. What's your preferred topping?

I go just powdered sugar and honey. I'm actually just powdered sugar. Just powdered sugar. That's all I need. I like the honey. Yeah, I like the- Or cinnamon's good too. Cinnamon, sugar, and honey, or powder and honey.

But we have to give a shout out to the dinner fry bread, where you've got like the, it's basically like chili and cheese. Because fry bread can be an instrument for just about anything. I mean, if you're putting other food that you would eat on top of this fried dough bread, I mean, it's going to be good unless it's a liquid. And this is the entire basis for my french fry restaurant fried things taste good yes step one there's no what a perfect capstone to this episode so insanely focused on exercise and weight to end in a fried food draft

of sorts yeah um yeah there's no way that a French fry based restaurant where it's just a bunch of things on fries would fail. Not in America. No, it would be amazing. You go to Europe, people would be like, what? I assume. I don't know. I've never been to Europe. That was a very nice European accent.

He goes, whoa? It was kind of an amalgamation. All right, so I'm up you took a funnel cake or fried bread which is a great pick um we just talked about my next pick right because french fries are the greatest add-on they're the greatest side in the world you are correct the kids love them grown-ups love them you can be getting i mean i've seen like meals where it's like you get a bowl of spaghetti and you can get fries with it not just burgers that sounds strange you know what's what's actually great is i don't know if this has been forever if i just had an awakening as i grew into an adult

chinese food places oh so good they've got french fries now a lot of the time yeah most all of them have and they are spectacular you want to know why? They're great. There's no way to mess up French fries. You can have inferior French fries. Okay. I mean, I'm not talking like old, oh, these French fries were made six hours ago. Yeah, they're messed up. You can have inferior French fries.

Like some people like the steak fries. Some people like the shoestring fries. I know we're on opposite sides of that, you idiots. Hey, idiot. Just kidding. But they're good opposite sides of that, you idiots. Hey, idiot. Just kidding. But they're good because they're deep fried in oil. That's the key. And it's just like, oh, this deep fried oil tastes good.

So I'm going to take French fries specifically because it's the fair. Chili fries? No, it's the curly fries. It's like Piggly Wiggly. Oh, really? I don't know. Is that national? Is Piggly Wiggly national? I don't even know what those are. Every fair I've ever been to is like that. But just those giant plates of curly fries. Yeah, every fair I've been to has that plate.

All right. So I get two picks, right? You do. I'm going to go with... What fried food do you want? Yeah, I'm going with two fried foods. And they're kind of the same, but they're different draft picks. So I'm taking them both because you've been talking about frying things in oil

and how great that is. Well, cheese is delicious too. Cheese is very good. I'm taking first fried cheese curds. Cheese curds are unstoppable. Yeah, they are. And then I'm not leaving the cheese category oh doubling up on the cheese i'm going fried mac and cheese oh my god okay which i've had many a time and they're

a terrible person they're outstanding mike was hoping they'd both come back mac and cheese is unbelievably good thank you so good great picks and the real key to both of those is the cheese and the fried yes it more than the mac yeah the pride of the cheese is let me let me ask you this and i and this is against my own pick okay okay but let's say i had a little block of cheese okay i bought it from the deli and i'm to slice you up a little piece. Right. And I'm going to give it to you. And then I said, well, hold on.

I'm going to take a potato. I'm going to slice off a little piece of this potato. Okay. And I'm going to give you that slice of a potato I got from a grocery store. These are two different experiences for me? They're just right next to each other. You got a slice of cheese. You got a little slice of a potato.

Eat these things. Which one tastes good? The cheese the cheese yeah because the potato is stupid a potato tastes good once it's deep fried or cooked and butter and all the potatoes are amazing but the base is nowhere near what the base of cheese is so you deep fry you're starting at a better base i've never heard it explained that way and it is it's accurate i mean potatoes are just cheap if cheese was as cheap as potatoes everywhere we'd go it would just be would you like would you like some cheese fries french fry cheese yeah all right um gosh there are so many different things and i'm fascinated where you're gonna go trying to think do i go

meal do i go snack do i go side do i go entree i've already kind of got the side and so when i go to a fair i've never thought there was an entree at a fair i've thought these were all there are a couple illegal foods there are a couple just not legal we had to get a special permit for this major entrees and i'm gonna take one now i love a fair gigantic corn dog yeah i thought you might take the huge fair sized corn dogs are delicious again fried it's like i love i love hot dogs hot dogs are one of my absolute favorite foods but then if you can just dip that in batter and fry it and then give it to me on a stick that I can carry around, I'm all in. Yeah, it's a solid pick, and it's such a perfect fair food. Yeah, because you still want to be able to walk around.

Even when I've gotten the fries before, it sucks. That's a two-handed affair. You've got to have one hand to hold if you're walking around and one hand to eat. You just might want to do the cornd dog toward the back half of your fair trip. Oh, it's... In case you need to... First in, first out.

Scooch out. Scooch out of there and take care of it. Yeah, because all this other stuff. Yeah. The fried cheese curds. I've been genuinely scarred by hot dog related foods in that department. You haven't eaten enough bad foods then because I am scarred by all equally. My insides have been scarred so much that I feel nothing now.

All right. My first pick here, I was going to say I'm going to take something that's not fried, but I can't speak with authority that they don't actually fry them. They're just not breaded, but they could be fried in oil. I'm going to take the turkey leg. I'm going to take the turkey leg. Oh, okay. I'm going to take the monster turkey leg. It's also available at Disneyland. I love it. Or

Renaissance festivals. Yeah, but it's a fair... Or Thanksgiving's. Not these turkey legs. No, I know. These turkey legs, you walk around and you feel like an absolute beast of a man. You want to talk about... Who left that review? Oh, yeah.

That guy goes from power tools to workouts to turkey legs. No doubt. For sure. So much protein. Yes. So I will take the turkey leg. Probably dinosaur legs for that guy. I've heard.

I cannot confirm nor deny, but I have heard that the Disneyland ones are actually ostrich legs. That sounds like a lie. That was a rumor floated around on the dark web. They're actually kookaburra legs. Kookaburra legs are actually real small. No, they're extinct.

They're not kookaburras, fine. They are? Yeah. Kookaburras are fine? Yeah, they live down in the old gum tree, eating all the gumdrops they can see, but down in Australia. What is happening?

I don't understand either of your references right now. You don't know the kookaburra? Kookaburra lives in the old gum tree. Never heard of the gumdrops. Mary, Mary, king of the bushes, he, or something. What? You know this? You don't know the kookaburra song?

Laugh, kookaburra, laugh. Laugh, kookaburra, laugh, kookaburra. Not in my life have I heard that. No, because it's so stupid. I knew it, Mike. Did your parents know each other growing up, and you two were like, your parents came up with this super funny song. What's the bird that's extinct?

Oh, a dodo bird. That's it. Thanks, Mike. This show is... It's probably a pigeon leg, am I right? Special. All right, so you took... So I took the turkey leg, and then I will take the staple of the fair.

How do you make an Oreo better? You deep fry it. You deep fry it. I will take the deep fried Oreos. I have my meats and my... You can do so much with Oreos. You can do so... You talk about you put cheese on a table, you put a potato on a table, you put an Oreo

on a table. Oreo's ready to go. Yeah. All right, Jason, you're up. All right. There are, I'm looking through this list. So far, you have a corn dog. You've got curly fries.

That's all he's got. Mike has a funnel cake, turkey leg, deep fried Oreo. Look, if I so choose to put chili and cheese on my curly fries, I can't. I can get any kind of curly fries I want. I can load them up. That's fine. Just so you've got a funnel cake. Sure, but when he puts up the poll, it will of curly fries i want i can load them up that's just like you got a funnel cake sure but when he puts up the poll it will say curly fries it will not say curly fries parentheses

any way i want to eat them uh i'll make it so um all right so now i feel like i've got my entree just take your nasty fried pickles and get it over with you don't fry i mean okay fried pickles are okay but i would rather at a fair, genuinely, fried pickles are good. I would rather get one of those big, you know, they've got those like monster pickles. Those are great. I know you hate pickles, but they're fantastic. I'm not taking that though, because I've got a plan here.

I've got my entree. I've got my side. I need my dessert. I need my dessert. And I would be horrifically off-brand if I did not take a churro at the fair. This is a fair thing to do. I'm not getting out of this draft without the best dessert. Well done. Well done.

Food that has ever existed. Churros are phenomenal. Feels like you snuck your way into the funnel cake category with the churro. Oh, yeah. I just basically stretched it out, rolled it in sugar. That was an excellent pick. I did not see it coming. And I ate it, and I am happy.

I feel a little bit insulted about the fried pickle comments that took place, because they was on my short list. No, they're good, but... But churro wins. Well, yeah. I've got... Would you like these fried pickles or a delicious churro? Yeah.

Well, it depends. Are you savory or are you sweet? If I'm in the mood for savory, then I would a delicious churro. Yeah. Well, it depends. Are you savory or are you sweet? If I'm in the mood for savory, then I would take a churro. Because it's that much better in its category. It's not savory. That I don't care what. No, I'm not saying it's savory. I'm saying I would pivot.

I would say, oh, I just want something savory. Wait a minute. There's a churro. You have curly fries, fried corn dog, and a churro. I guess all corn dogs are not fried Just fair corn dogs No they're fried That's just a corn dog That was a pivot

I was just reading fried corn dog And I was wondering if it was redundant You just call it a corn dog I have cheese curds, mac and cheese I'm going to go to the dessert round And I'm just going to I'm going to go to the dessert round, and I'm just going to, because I don't want to miss anything here. I'm going to go dessert waffles.

Okay. I've had the trucks. Oh, the waffle trucks are fantastic. How are there not more of these? There's kind of dessert waffles where you can put tons of stuff on top of them, or there's waffle ice cream sandwiches. I like the waffle. Oh, they're so good. They'll make waffle sandwiches sandwiches that are just basically here's two waffles and a bunch of dessert in the middle

it'll be like bananas and chocolate yes whipped cream butter whatever yeah and it's like here eat all of the stuff you like in a convenient package of waffles yeah and so i guess what you're saying is i can't choose chili fries for another pick, right? Correct. Because you just have fries. And I've got dessert waffles. And so I will go with the savory choice of fried pickles. I like fried pickles. I think they're a unique, fair treat. And so that's how I'll round it out.

All right. So this is tough. You have two picks left. I've got three things on my list here where they're classic okay i'm gonna i'm gonna say something i know you've got a pick left mike do you have some on your list are you i do all right so i'm gonna say i doubt my the one i want to take is on your list so like i'm gonna throw this one out first because i'm definitely not taking it but it's on my short list like popcorn kettle corn right you're walking around there yeah you want that but the problem is that's

a concession of like everywhere defeat it's it's a concession of ever it's not a fair it's not a fair andy's so sad he didn't take kettle corn right now no there's another one that i'm about to say one that is just a low-hanging you go to you know fruit you go to you go to the movie theater you go to your kid's school event. They got a popcorn machine maker. Yeah. You know what I mean? Cattlecorn's a little different, though.

Sure, but cattlecorn's at every movie theater I'm at now. Sometimes they have the different flavors. So now I'm between two. I'm between cotton candy. Yeah, that's the one I was thinking of. Yeah. It's a fair treat. It is a fair treat.

I know. Cotton candy's not good. Oh, tell that to my children. Well, yeah, I candy is not good. Oh, tell that to my children. Well, yeah, I will. And myself. I'll tell it to my children. You talk about something you loved as a kid that you kind of hate as an adult. Maybe cotton candy is the one.

Because it's too sweet. I hated it in both areas. No, you didn't. No, I did. I did. I did. I did. I did.

I did. I did. I did. I did. I 100% did. This is why your food takes are the worst. Because you have no food. Oh, it's disgusting.

Cotton candy is terrible. Yes. Owl yes and it's a mess yes owl and you have the exact same taste though right like you often you'll go to lunch you'll just say give me what mike likes because i like bad food too and so you know it makes sense uh but i'm not gonna go with cotton candy you'll be happy owl i am going to go something very similar to what mike went with but the better version. Because I've had both of these at the fair. One of these deep fries perfectly and one of these doesn't. The Oreo's okay. But if you really want the deep fried

treat, it's the deep fried Twinkie. The deep fried Twinkie, there's no other place, like Cotton Candy, I can get elsewhere. Popcorn, I can get elsewhere. I have no idea on planet Earth where you could get a deep fried Twinkie other than at state fairs. You've had two home run picks back to back, I'll be honest with you.

It's well done. It's a food draft. Well done. You are well done in your element. All right. So my draft is over. Andy's draft is over. Mike, take it away.

So mine is, to me, is a fair food. It's also, Mike. Take it away. So mine is, I don't, it's, to me, is a fair food. It's also a street food. And my, I apologize. Roadkill. I apologize. That was the last episode. Apologize. My Spanish accent is not good.

But it's a lotte or Mexican street corn. Are you familiar with the Mexican street corn? I am familiar with that it is delicious now this is just it is so good is that not because i was thinking on my short list was uh like a fair corn on the cob they make is that not a corn on the cob it's i mean is it off the cob no no it's a corn on the they make both but the the the the common way to make it is corn on the cob but it's like it's got the lime, the chili powder, cilantro, mayonnaise on it. I thought about doing a bacon-wrapped corn situation for the fair, too.

So corn is kind of... Corn's underrated because it's not fried and it's a vegetable. Corn is amazing because it's a vegetable. It's super sugary, isn't it? It doesn't have a ton of sugar. It has no nutritional value. It just masquerades as a vegetable, but has no nutritional value. I learned in my anthropology class in college, they can look at skeletons and go, oh, yeah,

this was a corn-based diet because the joints have nothing left because there's no nutrition in it. Here's the thing. That's kind of not true. You can get fat, vitamin A, vitamin E vitamin e vitamin b vitamin k from the butter well you get that on corn and so i think that it's really it's just a it's a vessel for butter here's the biggest problem i have my wife is unfortunately she has a proclivity towards vegetables she likes them she thinks they taste good i don't know what planet she's from.

However, she tries to get, you know, oh, eat healthier, right? Eat a vegetable. Except for all the vegetables I even want to inch towards, she just destroys them, undresses them as having no nutritional value of any kind. Potatoes, useless starches. Yeah. Corn, useless.

Yes. Lettuce. No, no no romaine iceberg stupid iceberg is so basically ice cream it's like no get a good romaine or a spinach i'm not sure i'm with you what i'm saying is is that she should be happy if i'm even entering the like same department as vegetables maybe it's a gateway vegetable. That's what I'm saying. You don't hear about gateway things being too good. Iceberg lettuce is a gateway to diabetes. No, that's not fair. It's a gateway to drinking too much water.

It's a gateway to romaine. I'm not going straight to spinach because it's awful. Spinach is way better than romaine. I'm going to start with some iceberg it's awful. Spinach is way better than romaine. But I'm going... They're both fine. I'm going to start with some iceberg. I've heard iceberg is actually legit bad for your digestive track. I don't believe it.

Why are all the things we like bad for us? Even when we're trying to be good. That's stupid. Here, let me do this. Nope, that's not it. Oh. Don't we have one of these? What did we learn today?

I learned today that Jason doesn't understand the zero part of zero G. I believe you don't know. I learned that all good vegetables are also bad for you. I learned the name of certain places of your body, and I also learned that all of our listeners are so rich and funny. That's true. And fancy. They know how to use power tools.

They work out. Oh, man. They exercise. To be young again. All right, we're done. Thank you for joining us, Spitballs. We'll see you next time. Goodbye.

Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast. To see what other nonsense the guys are up to, check out spitballerspod.com. Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast. If you want to hear more, if you want access to the full archive, ad-free, go to spitballerspod.com. You can get all the information it takes to support this show.