Spitballers Comedy Podcast - Brad’s Guy & Recreational Activities to Get Hurt - Comedy Podcast

Episode Date: August 4, 2025

The hunt for Brad’s guy is on to help us fight the effects of aging, plus the return of Highway to Spell! Lots of laughs and hilarious events before we wrap things up with a Recreational Activities to Get Hurt Draft. Re-brand Mondays with some comedy! Subscribe and tell your friends about another funny episode of The Spitballers Comedy Podcast!Connect with the Spitballers Comedy Podcast:Become an Official Spitwad: SpitballersPod.comFollow us on X: x.com/SpitballersPodFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/SpitballersPodSubscribe on YouTube: YouTube.com/Spitballers

What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the Spitballers Podcast with Andy, Mike and Jason. I understand why that just happened. But that was horrific to listen to. It was real bad. I didn't like it. You didn't have to listen. You got to say it.

Listening to that was like pure torture. Did you think I was in pain? You made me in pain. Okay. Well, look, you know why I did it. Yes. Because we're drafting a topic that relates to getting hurt. Yeah, I know what the 101 is now, listening to Andy Skat. I am pretty disappointed it didn't end with a McGroin. I thought about it. I really did. I thought about it. I didn't want to you know I try to keep things real real clean up in here. We don't talk about McGroins. But now we are. Well

we're gonna be talking about activities that you might get a McGroin strain. That's true. We are drafting recreational activities that you do if you want to get hurt, which that is the great The great equalizer. The great equation in decisions that you make, especially past a certain age. Yes. It's like, I like fun.

What fun will I get hurt doing? And there's a lot. Oh, man. At this age, I thought about just drafting, like walking, sleeping, sitting in a chair. I mean, I've had a few sitting injuries. You are famous for them. We're also going to do some Would You Rather today and a revisiting. I believe there's only permission to do the segment about once a year, but Al Borland has brought back Highway to Spell Jason is the one that made that sound also uncomfortable to listen to but we'll be doing that on today's episode episode 335 of the spitballers. The nice thing is when we play Highway to Spell I don't have to do it as long as you guys

That is normally right you get to be more of a audience member. Right, right. Although you've won it before, haven't you? I think I did once. Yeah, so just harking back to those good days. Stop clock. Accidents happen. Did we start him a couple grades lower?

Is that what happened? Probably. I don't remember. At Spitballers pod. What letter does this word begin with? Uh, there might be a four. At Spitballers pod, one X. What letter does this word begin with? Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Oh, there might be a few.

Swing box. There might be a few we could get them on. Are you going to the mall? Oh, my goodness. All right, we have Al Borland in the house, sitting over there in Deucer's Alley with Papa Josh. We're here. And they never have to spell lucky.

We sure don't. No. We are going to kick it off with some. I'm sure Josh would tell you he's the best speller. Yeah, what do you think, Josh? Are you a good speller? L-U-C-K-Y, lucky. Oh, OK, lucky speller.

I just always get it right. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. I tried to move on, man. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. But did you hear what he said? Do you? You just described yourself as a lucky speller. Is that what you did?

I wrote it out there like, oh, right again. My children, I've had to explain to them the, you know, they say the, with filler words, and we all kind of do it, because you just described something like, I don't know why. I'm just really good at this. You know, like, I'm like, stop. People don't like that. Like that comes off as really braggadocious and arrogant when you're just like, I don't know why I'm just so good. So good. Yeah. And literally Josh literally just gave the,

I don't know why I'm just so good at spelling. It's not I'm good I'm just super lucky. We know why he's got more experience. Oh good. Let's do so much you'd rather. Would you rather? Papa Josh is he is so Papa Josh. I've never seen someone who is more who they are. Here's, here's, here's, no, no, no, I can explain it. And I think Papa Josh, I'll even put him on the camera here. I think he will actually, no, no, no, you're gonna like this explanation. You're such a genuinely kind, nice, and optimistic person

that you give other people the benefit of the doubt, and optimistic person that you give other people the benefit of the doubt, including yourself. You give yourself the benefit of the doubt as well. Sort of, cause he's the best. The benefits for other, they're not the best. Danny from the website says, so would you rather, your family is now doing movie night every Tuesday evening and game night every Thursday evening,

would you rather consistently be the game night victor or get to pick the movie at every family movie night? I know my answer very quickly. Oh, me too. It is game night victor. Of course it's game night victor. I can be surprised by other people's movie choices to the positive side.

I don't think I, unlike Josh, I don't think I pick all the best movies. I also think when I have to choose the movie, that sucks. Like I would rather go in and if someone else has been in charge of picking the movie, I'll watch whatever, but I'm so indecisive that I feel like, oh man. You think you can run into a real stinker. Sure, I could run into a stinker, I'll watch whatever, but I'm so indecisive that I feel like, oh man.

You think you can run into a real stinker? Sure, I could run into a stinker, but I don't think that my other family members are picking bad movies on purpose. It might be a movie we've never seen before, in which case, it's a stinker. Okay, that happens. You know, we go to the movie theater,

a movie I'm excited about, I see a stinker. I'm not too worried about that, but I like, I hate being the one to decide and I know when I decide not everyone's gonna agree. And you know that you love winning. Yes that is the main point. And it's funny because this is just a character flaw but I have it. It's it doesn't matter if the audience is three. If I win like three times in a row, I'm gonna make you feel it. I'm gonna let you know. Like I wanna walk out of that game night every night going,

you can't beat me. And I feel like, I'd be like Mike, you're that way with- I am. With like the Mario Kart with the boy, you never give him a free pass? No, I do not give a free pass. It has, things are getting harder as the children are getting older.

That's true. My son can now beat me in Pool Pig. I thought you were gonna say also a 40 yard dash. Oh yeah, that's done. He can beat you in Pool Pig. Yes. Okay. We were playing some Mario Party over the weekend student has become a teacher Which Mario Party was banned in my house for years. Oh bad Bad attitude if you steal a star, is that what it is? Yeah, the way just mad all three of my children have my

competitive The way, just, man, all three of my children have my competitive desire and drive to win. And it just, so it got banned, and I was like, okay, we'll finally, we'll do this again. He brought it out of the ban box. Yeah, I did, I let it happen. And then, I mean, it went pretty close to as expected. It wasn't as bad. But if you've ever played Mario Party,

and I'm, like, I'm winning the whole time, it's going very, very well for me, and then just a stroke of unlucky on my last roll, I end up landing on a space that just gives a star to my youngest, and who had just bought a star, it was like, they show your win probability at the end it was I'm winning until the last turn oh and how that I was I I think I handled it appropriately for my children but inside went back into my goodness slam the door I was so unhappy screamed into the pillow my victory was stolen stolen. Yeah. Oh, man.

My blood was boiling. That game's tough because for those of you out there, and that's a lot of you that have played it, they also have, at least the versions that I've had, they have the stars at the end. Yep. And sometimes they're very arbitrary. It's like, who's gone the most spaces?

That was the star. Oh, no! The only Scott that took him over the edge. That's the one. It's like just this what the one that moves the most. Yeah. Well, the Nintendo games are famous for equalizing things. Goodness gracious. Yeah. Victory. Yeah. I'm not going to lose. Jason, you're with that. Of course. Philip from Patreon. Would you rather get five cents for every step that you take or five seconds of time added to your lifespan.

Was this like the Timberlake movie? Oh, man. So you got to walk? So 10,000 steps, for example, would be like 500 bucks. Okay. That's a lot of steps. 10,000 steps is what you should be getting every day. I don't hit that, but that's doable. That's a lot of steps. It is not the the average for people people are more in the five range Yeah, like right now. I'm probably in the the 7500 ish range, which is a good amount Now ten thousand steps a day in time breaks down to about 13.8 extra hours of life

Which means that you're just additional that means you're getting half your day back, right? That's extra life. That means you're basically living double. That's the choice. I mean, so this is, you said that you're gonna get to an age where you're not keeping up. Oh, you don't do the steps as much. You're gaining 14 hours. Just about.

Every day. If you walk 10,000 steps, and you wanna know what? You walk 10,000 steps, your health's gonna be better. Yeah, it will. Well, that's true, you get more than that 14 hours, you're right. But you will reach a point where walking is difficult and you're going to know that if you don't go out there

and walk, you're gonna die. Would that work? I mean, that's kinda true now. Yeah, but it's not as intense and existential of like, if I don't go walk right now. I'm down to 20 I guess you could go at any moment. Alternatively every year if you're walking those steps. Yeah, you're making a hundred and eighty two thousand five hundred dollars. I'm gonna take that one You want money not the time?

well Yeah, you know what I can do with the time if I got that money? Time is money. Now, when you're counting steps. Could you add more hours to your life with that amount of money invested in your health? I would. More than 14 hours a day of life? No, of course not.

That's 14 hours extra. You could have a full-time person, I mean, well, maybe not. Not a doctor. But I was just thinking you could have somebody overseeing the extension of your life. Yeah, you would have to make more money than that. I mean, every day that,

you live so many days in your life, 24 hours in a day, but 14 of those hours get redeemed. So your days are now 10 hours. Well, I mean, that's, so to do the same math on the course of the year, how many days extra you get, so you get $182,000 a year. Or? Or 212 days.

212 days. Tacked on. You have to go that route. Now, but what's funny is like, what if that was just available to buy? What if you could buy time in that exact same way? Would you work harder to get more money so you could buy that time?

Oh, okay, that's a fair question. That's what I'm saying. Because yes, let's just put that to the test right here. 182,000. Would you pay $182,000 for 212 more days? Yeah, if I could afford it, yeah. You would? for 212 more days? If I could afford it, yeah. You would? For 212 more days?

Yes. I don't think I would. Oh, I don't think I would do that. That's almost 2 thirds of your lifespan added per year. No, no, no, I'm just saying just. You're saying a one time purchase? One time per. You get 200 extra days for basically $200,000.

I'm thinking, yeah, that's interesting. If it's one-time purchase. I don't think I do it right Yeah, but if it's something I could keep buying and let it stack. I feel like I would try to do that Yeah, because if it's why is that why would you need everybody else to do it? Why would I know on the on the website? Yeah, we really really really, not at all. I mean, that's ridiculous. I mean, maybe I live to be the same age as my kids. That's cool. You're gonna be so shriveled and gross. Mike said something earlier that I discounted

that I think is actually correct. So. It's adding 23 years over a 40-year span, by the way. Okay, so you are currently, let's say you're going to live to 80. Yeah. So that's another 40-ish years. Oh, and I can go to 103. And you can go to 103.

Yeah. So you get to go from 80 to 103. But how much is it per year? 182,000. 182 times 40 years, $7.28 million. I did not think I was going gonna walk away here with the money I thought I was taking life, but I mean really working through this exercise Would you pay when you turn 80 and you're on the deathbed though, and you're about to

You're about to die that sound I made at the top of the show. Yeah Would you want to 7.2 million dollars of sitting in your retirement? Yeah, you swap in that for that 23 years of living? Of extra? Yeah. No. 23 years of extra living? Well, assuming I'm old and I'm like. You're 80 and you could go to 103.

No. Those are the, that's when you want to die. But you don't need that money then. You're going to die. You don't want that life. No, I want the money 20 years earlier. Earlier. 20 years earlier.

Yeah. Yeah. No, give me the money. Yeah, give me that money. You two have severely disparaged being over 100 years old in recent shows. Yeah. You don't think you could be a Spry 103?

No, I don't. The steps are gonna help. Interesting. This has been a really, I'm curious what the Deucers would do back there. Papa Josh, what would you do, would you take the money or the time? I'd take the time.

Okay, what about you, Al? I think that's the way I lean too, and primarily just in case I'm currently slated to die at like 55 or 60. Which you- I'd rather extend that. Are you a little worried about that? Not necessarily, but we could all go any day. Yeah, no, you could.

You're adding it onto the back of your life despite when- Yeah, that's a good point. And if you look at the five of us, we would pick you first. So... I guess that's like buying... Thank you.

That's like buying a... If you could buy it in a 23-year chunk, you'd buy it as quick as you could, because it would guarantee you 23. You don't know if tomorrow you're going to... I agree with Mike. I don't know that I would want to live... If I'm going to live till 90,

I don't know that I want another 20 years, but the security of Possibly go so Mike wants the 7.2 million spent in his 60s to 80s Spend it all out and then like the last coin hits the bottom and he's dead Yeah, nothing left for the kids stay sweet everybody That should be some sort of reward like if you can spin to the minute into the day so you have nothing, like you get a bonus. All right, Kevin from Patreon, would you rather immediately look 60,

but lock in on that appearance? Wait, what is? It's a little, it is different. It's kind of related, but not really. Would you rather immediately look 60? So boom, we're all about 40. Yeah. So you go to 60. That's not gonna be great.

No. But you lock in that appearance and live to your 95 with that appearance locked in. Wait a minute. What is this last part? Or lock in your appearance now and die at 70. Okay. How you look in your 40s.

This is how you're gonna be. Boy, this is such a vain question. This is such a vain question. Because it has nothing to do with how you feel at 95. It's just how you look. Just looks. You're going to sacrifice 20 years of your life for looking better?

Yeah, I'll take that one. We're all in the 40s. We're all looking in the mirror. We see what's going on. Yeah. Accelerate that 20 years. Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble. I now know how bad it can and will get.

Or could've if I didn't take. Can I get face lifts and stuff? Can we have an honest moment? Yeah, let's go. That's what the show's for. When I was 20, if I saw somebody trying to hold on to youth at 40, I genuinely thought they were pathetic. Yeah, no, I get it.

I thought that they, I was like, just age gracefully. Why are you injecting this and buffeting that or whatever you're doing to keep the hair extensions, or not extensions, the hair, work on your hair or wigs or anything. Anything that. And you were like, I'm better than you. Yes, because I'm young. Stop trying to be me.

Right. It was just almost like. There was a little bit of that. Like you're old, just deal with it. Yes. And I just. I'm gonna be young forever. I just thought they were all just,

it made no sense to me. It's like, just accept your age and live with it. There's no other part of this. Oh, I was gonna say, and now. No, there is another part of this, right. It's just, now I get it. Yeah, and then. Because now I understand why it happens,

but it's still such a stupid uphill battle. And I still believe fundamentally, philosophically, just accept. Yeah, no, you're right. Because age is a gift. It is. You could just, you could lock your age in at 25. If you die at 25, you'll never look older. But you get the blessing of growing older.

Yeah, but then you see... What, I'm idiots? No, no, no, no. It's, obviously it's an extreme situation because Brad Pitt was a very attractive man, it still is, but you can tell that Brad Pitt had a very skilled person fix some things on his face. Right. And now I'm like, who did that? Yeah, yeah.

What is, who did that? What is the number of that person? I see people who have gone to a very unskilled person who tried to fix their face. This is not what you should just accept. No, that's why I need Brad Pitt's guy. Brad, if you're listening, please DM me the information for your guy.

OK. Let's get more honest. OK. OK. I know Brad Pitt's guy. You've been holding out on me. Let's get more honest. Okay. Okay. I know Brad Pitt's guy. He's been holding out on me. If you, cause like, you know, the whole face surgery, that's a level that I feel like I would never do.

It's very scary. Like Botox, okay, easy, so common, so regular, and actually some Botox. There's actually some benefit to it. But like surgery, face surgery, things like that, it seemed so wildly outlandish, bad. The risk reward is not acceptable. If you knew for sure, if you knew for sure

that the surgery would be perfect, you could not tell that you had surgery, your face just looks younger, and you knew it 100% guaranteed. Yes, I would do it. Andy? Yeah, probably. Yeah, I would. If you don't know. I thought you were going to be like, there's an 80% chance it comes out looking great. No, because I think that's-

I was like, yeah, okay. You're like, still in. I know math, that's pretty good. It's just funny to me because it's literally, time does not stop. So everything is a band-aid. Uh-huh. You know what I mean? That's okay, that's all right.

Band-aids do great work. Yeah, just a couple of years. When I get a cut, when I get a cut, I want a band-aid. I see Papa Josh shaking his head. And as somebody who definitely hasn't gotten work done. Way to age gracefully. You're thinking just accept the time, right? You just got to accept that you're old and ugly, man. He said it before.

No, I don't. You do. Yeah, I wasn't born ugly, so I don't have to accept that I'm ugly, Josh. Oh, Josh. Oh man. And also, I don't care if people, like if you were like, where people don't even know, I don't care. Look at my face.

Yeah. Know that it happened, but as long as it's looking good. Yeah, I completely agree. I've been looking into for years, like the hair transplant surgery. You're looking for Brad's guy. Dude, we gotta find this. I'm looking for Steve Carell's guy. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. That guy did good work. I'm Chad GPT-ing like places in Turkey. Where you been trying to? You know, I would do it in a heartbeat. And I don't care if people know. I'm not embarrassed. You've said that before.

If you had a beautiful head of hair that was a toupee, you'd rip the hat off. Yes, 100%. Like Carell, we all saw the hair. Yeah. It's documented. You can still go see it. Yeah, you can watch, he's got.

And then it was fixed. There are lots of people like that. Terrible hairline, awful looking, and then looks wonderful. His hair's awesome now. Oh no, he got a hair job. Man, you look really good. Now why, you have done a tremendous amount of work

on health and fitness in the last year. You look great. Thanks. You get comments all the time. Why didn't you do it earlier? Because it wasn't until you hit a certain age where you realize this sucks. It's now or never?

It's now or never and it sucks. It was always acceptable, it was always okay. Isn't that funny? And then you get to a place where it's like my body don't work I've got too far. Yeah, and so it's like I try to The last bite of that cheese I try to now go because I just think like man I wish me now could go back to me in my 20s and somehow get through. Because 20 year olds know it's impossible. Yeah.

I tried to- Because they're looking at you going, why are you holding on to your youth, man? What a loser. Yeah. I try to tell my kids now, like try to- My kids eat pure unadulterated slop 24-7 and feel fine doing it. There's no way you convince that person to eat better. They don't need to exercise.

They still have no- I'm going to live forever They still have no body fat. Man. You know what I learned on today's Spitballers episode? That I really hope face surgeries get good in the next 20 years. Be the tech optimist that it gets better by the time you. The tech optimist where it's like, oh, all right.

So maybe we'll be 100 seconds. Are you locking in the 60 look till 95? Or are you locking in the now till 70? I hate to say it, but I'm old diet 70. Yeah. Oh. Wow. Looking like now till 70.

Because you'd get compliments from 50 to 70. Oh, for sure. Right? Yes. Yeah. I think, oh man. And 70 to 95. How do you not take the diet 70

after you wanted to diet 80? Just move it up another. Because I don't want to go. You can spin your money faster. But not at 70. Oh, so 80s though. So it's 70, 80 is the age. Yeah, 70, 72 young. 80 is the age in my mind.

I mean your lives are more than half over. I will say this. Yes, I am aware. Like, I think. I've looked at my face. I think your 70s are absolutely fine. Your 70s are... Like if you take care of your body,

it's still gonna be functional. Exactly, you're functional. 80s, you're dead. But not by the time we're 80s. See, that's why I choose to believe it. That is a good hope. That is a good hope. Our 80s, I wanna be saying,

80's the new 60. You know that phrase? Oh man, yeah. I wanna be saying that. If 80 is the new 60, we will have made some bets. This saying that if 80s the new 60 this is the weirdest show what is so many people are like listening to this like shut up for this podcast old farts why don't we spell crap Highway to Spell. Did you have something to add there, Jay? I was literally just going to say C-R-A-P. That was it. It was just the deadest of all

dead jokes. Oh, because I said spell. Some crap. I gotcha. All right, we're gonna play some highway to spell Return to this famous adventure and I don't know who starts first and I don't know what grade level we start on but play along I start on fourth grade We're both in high school. We start on fifth grade. Okay, and we'll be starting with Andy Yeah, Andy your fifth grade word is favorite. Oh, come on. I know that one. F-A-V-O-R-I-T-E favorite. Nailed it. It's the first one, getting that out of the way. It is scary. Boys, let me tell you, it's great to have it done with.

It's like going on. I didn't hear the sound the sound effect was it there did I get the checkmark sound effect? I apologize. Thank you It's my favorite sound who wants to be a millionaire Oh, I like that first questions got to be so nerve-racking because it's supposed to be a gimme Yeah, you can't be embarrassed in front of everybody. Yeah. All right, I'm through though You are through the fifth grade Mike your fifth grade level word. I feel like I'm closing in on a name here guys a Name yeah Brad's guy After the show I mean if you're if you're a

I'm not I didn't even you're I don't even know what Andy's word was I was locked in if you're a surgeon if you're a plastic surgeon Wouldn't you just leak that you're Brad's guy you but, but you have to be very discreet about it. Well, Brad doesn't want people to know that he has a guy. You just get some burners and just go start commenting on places. Oh yeah, I know who did this. I know who did this. All right, Mike, your word. Chocolate.

Oh, gosh. Chocolate. Oh, that's easy. C-H-O-C-O-L-A-T-E. Chocolate. chocolate oh that's easy CHOCOLATE chocolate I like it you put the O in there that's what I would have needed to do alright only one person to blow it now

oh baby the nurse james sweating here's your fifth grade level word wound what? wound okay wound uh okay Wound. What? What? Wound. Okay. Wound. Wound.

Okay, that one I know. I hope. W-O-U-N-D. Sounds so simple. It freaked me out when you said it. I was like, that's too few letters. All right. All righty, everybody made it through the fifth grade.

We're gonna move on to sixth grade. Andy, here is your sixth grade level word. Exercise. Oh yeah. I get, I mess that one up all the time. I do too. Oh no. I think I've got it. It looks right on my board. Oh, I mess this one up all the time. Hold on. This is definitely a red squiggly word. E-X-E-R-C-I-S-E, exercise. Oh boy, I had an extra C in one of those. I am clearing my board, Mike. Good work over there. Luckily, I think yours is gonna be a little easier here, Mike. Your sixth grade level word.

Entrance. Enterance. Oh no. Entrance. Enturance. Oh no. Entrance. Oh gosh. No, I psyched myself out. There's a chance I spelled this wrong. I think I got it.

Entrance, E-N-T-R-A-N-C-E. You scared me with your pronunciation. When you said enturance. I wrote down enturance and I said, that's not right. Good work over there, Mike. Jason got it wrong, all right. I wrote and then I wrote down entrance and I said that's not right Well, he said entrance When I heard that I thought Mike was dead, I thought I thought he was dead when he read it All right, Jason, all right, here's your sixth grade level word. Oh, man. Plumber. All right.

Oh, no. All right, I got that one. P-L-U-M-B-E-R, plumber. I'm entertained by the pronunciations today. I love it. All right. All right, everybody's graduating to the seventh grade. Weak.

Andy, here's your seventh grade seventh grade. Weak. Yeah. Andy, here's your seventh grade level word. Boundary. Boundary. B-O-U-N-D-A-R-Y boundary. Boundary. Boundary. Boundary. Boundary. All right. Mike, your seventh grade level word.

Paralysis. What? Paralysis. What? Paralysis? Correct. I think I got it, but. Okay, we're gonna go P-A-R-A-L-Y-S-I-S. Ding ding ding. Yay, we did it.

Nailed it. It's back to me already? You got scared, then you hunkered down and dominated the seventh grade. Dug deep and yeah, yeah dominated the seventh grade deep We don't here is your seventh grade level word Bizarre oh No, oh Oh

This word is spelled. Oh, no, come on man It's like a seven 17th grade word There's no way that's right. There's like a 17th grade word. There's no way that's right. There's no way that's right. He's writing it down again. Oh man, how many R's are in that? Shoot.

Bizarre-y. Bizarre. Dude, I'm done. I am done for. Let's find out. B-I-Z. A. R?

And then the next letter is... E. Bazaar. No. R-E? That was what I wrote down first! That was what I wrote down first! That was what I wrote down first! And then it looked so wrong.

I couldn't figure out if it was two Zs or two Rs. Yes, it was two Rs. You had it correct other than the the second R. Oh man. Well, you made it through a few rounds there, bud. Thank you, man. You're gonna hang out in seventh grade there. I feel pretty smart. But the other two are moving on to eighth grade

All right, Andy. Here is your eighth grade level word vulnerable Vulnerable Hmm hmm that one's easy VULNERABLE Vulnerable Had that one go with the first spell. Bizarre. Freaking turd. All right, Mike, here's your eighth grade level word. Unconscious. Oh, no way. You give him the easy one. No way. Uncon... Oh, that one's shush. No way. No, no way.

I have so many letters in this word. I've got my best guess, but I'm happy I don't have that one. Oh, no way. No way! Alright, whatever. Let's go. U-N-C-O-N S-C-I-O-U-S U-N-C-O-N-S-C-I-O-U-S.

Yeah! Good work. Whoa! I had, didn't, that was one of my three versions! Yes! That was... Oh man! Definitely... Swish! Not what I wrote down.

Did you say S-C? Yeah. Oh, you're a man! Yeah! Wow. All right. That was so good. So you got it wrong too, right? I would it wrong. Yeah. Wow. I didn't have no middle s in there I always heard it was spelled

Conscience and so I wrote that that's conscience. Yeah, that's a different word conscience. It looked right. So that makes sense It's a word All right. We're moving on to the ninth grade unconscious What was the word? Unconscious. No. No. Unconscious. He was unconscious.

Not unconscious. Unconscious. I've got no conscience. I'm unconscious. We are dumb. Unconscious. What was it? Unconscious.

He's on his spout. Unconscious. I mean, what would the word unconscious mean? That's so stupid. I don't know. that's so stupid. I don't know. It's the opposite. It's a sociopath, right?

Yeah, it's like... A sociopath is unconscious. It's an unconscious. It's like Jiminy Cricket with devil horns. I gotta see if that's a real word. Are we in high school? We are ninth grade, so yes. All right.

Okay, high school. I feel good now. When I spell unconscious, it says, these are the results for unconscious yeah yeah all right here is your ninth grade level word Andy irrevocable yeah get bodied IRR EVO irrevocable. Nice, that's pretty good. I wrote that one down. You took no time with that one. Yeah, I did.

Time is my enemy. It's your enemy. If I would have just wrote down Bazaar. Bazaar, you would have been right. Plus, imagine the things you could get wrong fast too. You'd have so many weird letters. The cool thing is, I don't have to be put under pressure anymore.

Yeah, you're done. So you're living free. Mike put under pressure anymore. Yeah, you're done. So you're living under pressure now. Mike's on under pressure now. This is a fun game. He's unconscious right now. Let's see if you guys can both move on to the 10th grade. Unconscious. Mike, here is your 9th grade level word.

Soliloquy. Nope. Nope. Nope. Soliloquy? Oh, you're dead, man. Oh, man. Soliloquy.

That is correct. I should know how to spell this. Soliloquy. Soliloquy? Oh, you're dead, man. Oh, man. Soliloquy. That is correct. I shouldn't know how to spell it. What? The act of talking to oneself. Solilo... Oh, I know what he's saying to himself right now.

I'm dead. What? What? Soliloquy. You can't even write one that makes you think you got it right. No. I think I got it right. Oh, let's's get can I phone a friend I don't think

you want to phone Jason's not the guy this is not right all right let's hear s a li la que oh man that's so wrong that was wrong. I told you I've noticed. I want to see what Jason's got. I wrote S-O-L-I-L-I-Q-U-E You started better. Ah nice. Andy, do you want to take a stab at it? I have no clue. I think it's S-I. No. S-O-L-I-L-O-Q-U-Y Oh, there's a Y at the end. Goodness. Q-U-Y. There's a Y at the end? No, really? True story. Q-U-Y.

Q-U-Y. Salilaqui. That gum it. That's a hard word spell. Feel free to fact check me on this one. S-O-L-I-L-O-Q-U-Y. Wow. That is, that's the word.

Sure. I hate to say it. That's the world's hardest word. That's the hardest word in English language. That and separate. I didn't. You had told me kids separate out of my life. Desperate and calendar. Oh, yeah. Restaurant for me, man. Restaurant. I know what starts with R. If you ask me like, I cannot not put an E at the end of restaurant. I can't do it. You want to be like, you got to know the song because it ends with T.

Restaurant. Every time I can't do it. You wanna be like, you're a bean? Restaurant-ay? Every time. I can't, I cannot not put an E on it. Hey, guess who won? Andy. Yay! All right, we're gonna take a break. Then we're gonna draft.

["The Spitballers Draft"] The Spitballers Draft. All right, we have chosen to draft, if you didn't guess it from my awesome scat, we are drafting recreational activities if you want to get hurt. All right? And at first when I was putting my list together, I didn't think there was a 101. I changed that opinion. I think there's a 101. Okay. There's a pure opt-in to getting hurt.

I don't really know anybody that's done this activity without some sort of injury, but people love it. They do it all the time. They want to do it. And I'm gonna kind of wrap them together. You guys can tell me if it's okay to wrap them together It is skiing snowboarding tubing snow stuff. It is skiing snowboarding. Yeah skiing snowboarding. Yeah, that's fine I mean, I I know it's fun

But I literally there's nothing there's no recreational activity. I've heard more injuries broken arms Jason tumbling down into a concussion. I busted my behind. My wife broke her back skiing? Because that's possible. If that's a possibility. Yeah. I did a full Tommy boy down the mountain. I mean, that was just stand up at the bottom looking up at my ski that's about half a mountain up there and I go, what in the world was that all about? That's, yeah, to me that one is like... My goggles smashed out. Between all the people I knew that got hurt and then all the famous people that died. Yeah, it's very dangerous. I was just, that one just seems like... And now, am I too old to start? Yes. Yep. Because if you're young and can get hurt,

I've never skied. You can go cross-country skiing just fine. OK. That's just walking with skis. That's just walking with skis. All right. I think that one I would probably. I'd just get a Nordic Trek.

Really. That's true. I'd get a snowmobile. So that's going to be my 101. Comparing the exercise. There are lots of recreational activities. Yeah, skiing definitely on the list. I thought you were gonna go with the one

that is near and dear to our hearts because I don't know if any of us made it out without injury. So I will take flag football. No, it's on the list. It's a great pick. I got a broken rib. Broken thumb. A broken thumb.

Josh tore his ACL twice. And a foot surgery. And a foot surgery. A little trifecta. Andy, we thought he broke a collarbone? Shoulder and wrist? I tore my labrum for sure. And then I thought I broke my wrist,

but did not break my wrist. Okay, Owl, what did you ever get? Cracked sternum. Cracked sternum? Oh, that's Jason. I popped my shoulder out. Oh, you had the shoulder issue, yeah. Which has never gotten better. No, it's a permanent forever injury. Yeah. So that's cool. My thumb. I do push-ups now and it's like I feel it every time. My thumb, like I used to be fully double-jointed in both thumbs. Single-jointed not. Single-jointed? Is now janky. All of us. No one escaped our adult-flag football years. It wasn't on my list.

But when you go around the room of five and we all are dead broke, yeah. And those people had multiple. That is good. That's a good pick. It's a broken sternum, bro. Wow. It hurt to cough for a long time and we kept playing sure did

I was out there the next week yeah I was out there the next play man pop that thing back in there get out there yeah we were we were mad we were so tough and stupid yeah that's a good one and champions yes, never forget. Pioria. Yes, B-League. Thank you. Oh, stop it. Thank you. Oh, that's very kind, Spivak. Oh, yeah, we know, we know. But I just want to make sure that they remember. Jason, you get two selections here. I get two. My 101 is still there, because I can't even watch videos of extreme parkour, like... Oh, yeah.

Parkour, why is this parkour parkour is the stupidest activity of all time that's some of the stuff they do is pretty cool cool but if I were to do it and I'm just jumping like parkour if you don't know what parkour is it's jumping from one thing to another thing yeah it's doing tricks it's off a building is, it's jumping from one thing to another thing. That's all it is. It's doing tricks off of buildings and between them. Everybody that does it is stupid until you're the best. So everything in between just looks dumb,

but if you're the best in the world, it is cool. But it's one of those things where- They do flips between tall buildings. I don't think I need to do that. When you, let's say it's not extreme parkour. Let's just, I'm at a park and there's benches at different levels and it's just regular parkour. One slip is just, it's a guaranteed injury.

Everything is like, hey, just don't hit the giant rock edge there, you idiot with your shin. So that's my first one. The second one. I imagine the groin's in danger in parkour. Oh yeah, for sure. But man, especially if you're going to jump on a bar. Yeah. When you see them doing the like climbing an exterior of a building, you know, like they just go hop, hop, hop, like, or up. I call it Jackie Channing. You're like, boom, boom, boom. And all of a sudden you're on the second floor. You're like. It's amazing. Or they do it where two walls are kind of close together, so they just...

Back and forth? Yeah, they go up. Or they slide down. And I'm like... Can you and a couple friends just like, can you call your friends and be like, let's go do some parkour? Yeah, well, I'm sure they do. Parkour! But every time I watch them, I'm like, man, these guys, imagine if you had to get away from the cops. Oh, yeah, that's true. They will never catch you. That's fair. I'm on the third floor to get away from the cops. Oh yeah, that's true. They will never catch you. That's fair.

I'm on the third floor now, go take the stairs. Yeah, you gotta yell copper at them, right? Yeah, yeah. See you later, copper! Doot, doot, doot, doot, doot. All right, my second one, this is, it feels like cheating, but it's really not. This is a recreational activity that people do on purpose.

It is famous. And the whole point is to get injured, or at least to not get injured. The whole point is to not die. It's running with the bulls. Oh. People do this. Yeah.

Where is that, in Barcelona or something? That's not on my list, that's such a good one. Running with the bulls? You're literally in a street that you can't get out of the way. They like block it off to where you can't get out of the way of a stampeding herd of Bulls. It feels like the final remnant of a gladiator era. Yeah. You're like, oh, dude, what did you win?

I got away from the Bull. I'm still alive. Well, me too. But I didn't. How about your buddy? Oh, he got gored. He's all over the place. Sir, what is the prize? Nothing. Didn't get hurt. I did it. I did the thing. Yeah, so it was invigorating. That one seems so dumb to me. All right, Mike, you are back up. You have flag football. That is a tremendous pick. So flag football is my first, my second thought. And now I also, I come at this perspective as a desert child.

I grew up here. I've lived here. And yet we still want to incorporate ice skating into our lives. And goodness gracious, it like, going to an ice skating into our lives and goodness gracious it like it going to an ice skating rink when they set them up just like for Christmas for the winter it I'm almost almost there's still a little devil inside but it's like I'm almost passed away like it's not funny because you're just watching grown adults go

crack in the and the sound of someone landing on ice is haunting. You know how it hurts. Yes. It's hard as ice. And you're in public, so you have to say, It's still a little funny, but. You have to save face a little bit.

Yes, you have to pretend you're not hurt. Falling in public means, oh, it's no big deal, and then you're off crying in the other room or something. I can't believe I didn't have ice skating on the list because, Oh, it's brutal because unless you grew up doing it, like the ice rinks around here, people just, it's like a once a year thing, and you all relearn how to ice skate.

Yes you do. There's two ways to not get injured ice skating. It's one is grow up doing it, you're really good. You're just an ice skater. Ice skaters don't get injured, they just go out and skate and it's wonderful. The other way is how I avoid injury, which is you're so bad that you can't... I'm holding the wall. Yeah.

I'm just... Oh, you're not good. Oh my gosh, I hate the idea of ice skating. I can't walk or glide. I'm literally holding a wall like a newborn deer. It's such a good thing. Your legs are just flailing around? That's great. I, ironically, I'm back up. I have skiing and snowboarding.

I did have mechanical bull riding in, but yours is so much better. That was one I thought, it's another bull related one, so I'm not gonna take that. I'm gonna- You could have just put like real bull riding. Well, I was thinking more in terms of like literally a recreational

thing I could go do. Oh yeah. I don't I can't go do the bull riding is not so much a recreation. It's a sport. It's a sport. It's not a top golf for bull riding. Right. And so I was trying to bridge that line of like this weekend I could go do it. Which is why I'm going to choose. I'm going to choose something that it this one doesn't even just hurt me. It hurts anybody that sets their feet upon any of these facilities. It is just, it might as well be a feeder to hospitals and to orthopedic surgeons. It is a trampoline park. Yeah, I figured it out.

I mean, we have a bunch of these around here. My kids always wanna go. They've all been hurt. And they all know people around them at all times. Like at no point can I ask them, are any of your friends actively hurt from a trampoline park? One of them always has a broken something. So that means these trampoline parks or jump parks,

whatever they are, they're just, how many a day are happening here? I feel like trampoline parks is a great pick. Trampolines are awful, but I almost think the backyard trampoline is even more dangerous. I was gonna bring up, you have to get insurance and they're like, do you have a trampoline? And if you say yes, they're like no.

If you say yes, you pay more money. Like, oh, that's a death machine. Those of you out there that are younger and you jumped on the backyard trampoline. I just want you to understand what it was like for us old heads in the 90s. There was no net and there was definitely no pad for the Springs exposed Springs exposed. How many times your leg go down through a spring? Several times. Every every session. Every session.

I mean, you hope your leg went down through the spring because it kind of kept you in place. You falling off the outside. You jumped the wrong. Yeah, you're right. It's better to have your leg go through the spring hole because that only just hurts like heck. Yeah.

So I had a time. So you know when you're jumping on trampolines and you bounce someone, right? You do the huge bounce. And you go one, two, three, and you do the double bounce. And so someone jumps down to the crisscross position or just on their butt, or even if they're standing. So I was doing this with my cousin in my backyard.

At what age were we? This would have been probably about 13, 12, 13 years. I don't think I would say... Early teens. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 12, 13, somewhere there. And I go to double bounce. We were doing this for a while. We're crushing it. We're killing it. Lots of big bounces. Lots of crushing it. We're killing it. Lots of big bounces. Lots of big bounces. And so we go to the next round and he goes, and what we were doing is one, two, three, he jumped down to his knees and I would double bounce him off his

knees. Oh no. And I don't know what happened on this one. Something with physics went wrong. I was too far behind him or something. But I double bounced him. Dude, he just was pulled to the side. He flew off the trampoline doing a backflip, cracked his head in the cement block fence. I mean, it was, I don't know how he's alive. Yeah, 399.95 at Costco. Yeah.

I was going to say, did the scorpion were like your back Oh, I've been over backwards cuz you get yeah cuz the double bad Josh jumped off of a roof I jumped off of a roof under trampoline once I had my tongue cut off from Like a chunk of my tongue was cut off. I will crawl under the trampoline. Yeah, my sister jumped on me Yeah, this is these are murder machine. Yeah, really, but they're so fun. Oh, they are pretty fun Good bounce, baby. All right. I'm up. I won't let you do it. I I'm not up wait. Oh, I thought you took trampoline and you took train. Yes, I took that's my park my third one I

Have a bunch of picks that I think are interesting. Man, I think, do you want me to stay away from roller skating and rollerblading? No, no. I feel like those are just, you have to put on pads. Like they actively try to tell you to put on pads. I think you roller skate, you roller blade, you go down if we all had them growing up. So I feel like, and I've had adults that are like, yeah, I'm gonna do that again.

It doesn't, they don't do it again very long. Stopping is very difficult. Yeah, stopping's hard, balance. That's the most inherent flaw of the rollerblades is getting used to it and being able to go forward and decently fast is very easy. Stopping is incredibly hard. And there's no wall. There's no wall like an ice hockey that will eventually stop you. You just have to like, have you ever been roller skating? Yeah, I've never skated in a roller park. Roller skating is about five times harder

than a roller blade. You think? I think so. I don't think so. I don't remember. And then they put the weird front brake thing on there. Yeah, I don't understand that at all. If they put a brake anywhere,

we'll all try to stop with that spot. Like they could put it anywhere they want and we'll be like, oh, we leaned to the, I leaned my body forward to brake? No. All right. You're back up, Mike. Okay. Uh, I'm going to go, uh, I have a, uh, I have a good friend who was a doctor and she always recommends we don't ever use these because she sees people who ride these. And you know those little electric scooters on the side of the road? Yeah.

That are really, really fun to ride. Those are so fun. Yeah. Well, people get hurt on those. Oh, dude. And not just like a- Really? Not just a baby, oh, I scraped my knee.

The bird scooters. People get hurt, hurt on them. We use those, I mean, not in the summer. You don't go outside in the summer. but in the cooler month of the year. In Arizona, we take family trips on those scooters all the time. But there's a difference between you know how to ride and you've built up being a better rider. I'm talking like you're just walking through the city and you're like, hey, there's this

transport I can take. It's hot. I rode a scooter when I was young there's this transport I can take, it's hot. I rode a scooter when I was young, and then they just jump on, and then your arm's broken. And you don't have a helmet when you're grabbing it out. It was number one on my list, was scooter riding. And it was all, I didn't pick it because I can ride a scooter well,

but I have watched people like on the boardwalk in California or different places, they're like, oh, what's this? This looks fun. And then I watched them eat it in front of everybody. And they are dangerous. All right, I'm up. I know my first one that's easy.

This one is one that, kind of like the flag football, I don't know anybody that really did this that came out unscathed, never had an accident. Mountain biking. 100%. Mountain biking. 100%. Andy, your brother mountain bikes, right? Has he ever eaten it? Like a thousand times. Yeah. And he's good at it. Right. Well, because the thing is,

is the better you get at mountain biking, all that means is I got to try a harder one. Yeah. That's true. You always level up to, you always have the same risk of injury. At all times. As you get better, you do things that equalize the risk. He's had multiple times where he's called me, he's broken a wrist, doing it, he's broken, he's cut himself open, but he called me one time,

he was like, he showed me pictures of this wreck, and I was like, thank goodness I had my full face mask on, because he'd be dead. He just would have, it was a rock to the face. Oh, you you mountain biked a lot in your youth. Did you ever come out unscathed? I never had any like broken bones, but I definitely went down a lot. Yeah, I mean, you're in the cactus.

Oh, it's just like you're just you're aiming for injury. Like that. And it's so unpredictable. You know what I mean? Like it's just the terrain if you've never been there before. I don't know. Yeah. All right. Now my last one, I'm between-

It's amazing how many things we do with the total risk of getting hurt all the time. Yeah, because you gotta live, man. We were like flag football was the funnest time of all five of our lives. Can't leave your life in a bubble now. Who needs a sternum? Some of these things though,

I feel like it is the danger that is why you do it. We didn't play flag football for the danger. We played it for the competition and the fun and the camaraderie. Like mountain biking, I feel like if, I mean, it's not like pelotonning. It's not pelotonning. You can ride a bike.

I'm going fast. Yeah, but it's like there is danger to. Yeah, I mean, I see that. Running with the Bulls, certainly. Running with the Bull. Yeah, but it's like there is danger to. Yeah, I mean I see that. Running with the Bulls certainly. Running with the Bulls for sure. I think parkour. It's the only danger. Parkour is part, like a lot of them,

it's like go places you're not supposed to be. Do things that are like risky. Doing tricks. Yeah, doing tricks. All right. It's looking cool. This one is, all right, for my last one, I'm between two, I'm just gonna go with the one is, all right, for my last one, I'm between two. I'm just gonna go with the one that the purpose is to get hurt, or to hurt.

It's just fighting. It's just fighting, man. I mean, we used to do this at parties all the time. I had boxing gloves. Are we going boxing or are we going fighting? I mean, I just had it written down as fighting. But like- No G. Yeah, just fighting. But like- No G.

Yeah, just fighting. Like, you know, it's a recreation. Whatever. If you take a Muay Thai, if you're boxing, if you're- I mean, it's not MMA. Yeah, whatever. It's just like the whole point is, like you stop. This is what I know.

The stopping point is somebody getting hurt. Exactly. Every recreation- There's no winning without it. There's no winning until someone's like, oh, I can't, you hit my nose, you broke my nose. Like the whole point. Or you tap out. Yeah, it's getting hurt.

Back in the day when I would do a lot of online video games, well, more than I do now, but one of the guys I would play with, he lived in Philadelphia. I never met the man in person, but we were, you know, internet buddies. And one Friday night, we're finishing up some games, we're like, oh, he's like, you know, what are you going to go do? It's like, oh, me and me and some buddies were going to go to the bars, probably get in some fights. Yeah, the record. Yeah, I'm like, hold on, hold on, dude. You're, your intent is to like, to do the thing I spend my life actively avoiding. You're gonna just go out and do this?

We're just looking to fight tonight. Wait, where was he from? Philly. Yeah, math checks out. Yeah, no, I know. People of Philadelphia, this is really colored, how I view people who live there. Offense intended.

They're not offended, I don't think. They're like, you're doing right. That's right, that's called a Friday night. That's probably my brother. I know that guy. So I'm up. Yeah, you're up. Last pick. You have flag football, ice skating, electric scooters, and? And we're going to go with, this is not something that most of our office goes out and does on a recreational basis, but we have one of them who's very good at it, and yet he has suffered massive injury doing it, so we're gonna go with rock climbing. For sure.

We have Rob, our programmer, who one day, we got a message like, yeah, I fell, I broke my ankle real, real bad. And we're like, oh. They carried me two miles, or however many miles. But you're strong and you're good at that thing. We're like, oh. And then he just. They carried me two miles. It's like. Or however many miles. But you're strong and you're good at that thing. He's like, yeah.

Yeah. Okay, well. Everyone gets hurt. Yeah. Eventually. No, thank you. Well, I've got a final pick. I know what it's gonna be.

There are more things on the list that I'm sure we'll bring up later, but I gotta close it out with wrestling with your kids. Ah, yes. I gotta cut. Ah, yes. I mean, there's just like a- Not them, they will be fine. They'll be fine. No, you will get it.

You talk about getting hit in the groin. Yes. That's a red alert. I mean, I have one kid that's like, if you tickle him, that's what he's going for. Oh, groin strike? He goes for it. Wow.

He's gotten it. He's got it set up to where like like he's so unpredictable in his kicking. He's like, you know, I won't have any regard for where I'm kicking. Oh yeah, the old, I can't control myself when I'm tickled routine. That's right. That's what he goes with. That's smart. That's smart. And also that's a lie. Yeah, well it's not a lie. You're not a ticklish person, Jay. No I am am I totally understand I know that you're you can't stop yourself from tickling But I I'm not gonna always end up like kicking every time I kick him in the groin

Kicked in the head He has no regard. Yeah, but yeah, they love it So they beg for it all the time or at least when they were little they used to is like, let's wrestle Let's wrestle that meant at least when they were little they used to, is like, let's wrestle, let's wrestle. That meant I'm gonna be winded and I'm gonna be hurt. So that is my final pick to go with skiing and snowboarding, trampoline park and roller skating.

Jason has parkour running with the Bulls Mountain biking and fighting, which I love, I love that. And then Mike finished with flag football, ice skating, electric scooters and rock climbing. Honorable mentions, I had bounce houses. Sure, like your trampoline park. But that kind of, yeah, kind of fit. Riding four by fours.

Oh yeah, ATVs are... And dirt biking. The only thing I had left on my list, which I was between fighting and this, the hoverboard. Oh, that, oh my goodness. If you don't know the hoverboard, it's the two foot, like it's only, you stand on this little two wheel thing.

And then you definitely don't hover around, you roll around. You roll around, I don't know why it's called a hoverboard, lying, you know, deceitful companies, but you will break your caustics. Yeah, yeah, you're gonna fall. Everyone, everyone goes down right on the back and it's not like the booty. You're not falling on your cheeks, you're falling on. Everyone goes down right on the back. And it's not like the booty.

You're not falling on your cheeks. You're falling on your bone. Just Google Mike Tyson hoverboard. That's what happens to every adult. Oh, have you not seen this, Mike? Your face is not literally. Right before you said that, I just threw the Slack chat. Oh, yeah, Mike Tyson hoverboard.

This is an, this is a athlete. This was, you know, a long time ago This is a very athletic capable man, and when he gets on this hoverboard, he's riding around, no problem. You know, he's spinning around. It's Kerplow! Kerplow! Oh, and there's no way we- With no bracing! There's no way to brace! You can't brace it!

Both feet are up on it. I had a- It's literally like the cartoon where you go on a banana peel and your legs go flying out from under you. In Mike Tyson's defense, he didn't fall on his tailbone. He caught himself with his head though. I went to a car show and they had these things called drift boards and everybody was in line to drive them. And it's like the back of the... It's almost like a scooter, but the back... And then you pull the lever and you just... The back drifts around and it's got this drifting. And I'm telling you, kids are in line, adults are in line, they're cruising around this course, they're flying.

I'm looking at this thing from the jump going, I don't know about that. Hey, no way. But my son wants to do it. So I'm in line, he's in line, we finally get it. Everyone's doing it, everyone's fine. I get this thing first turn I eat So much crap and then I have to do the play it off thing. There's hundreds of people on the court

Did I meander around the course as slow as someone can do and then they then they're like, I come back around and he goes, you wanna do another lap? And I go, no, no, I'm good, it was really cool. I got my fill here. So yeah, yeah, we ain't doing no more drift boards. What did we learn today? I learned that Josh is not a good speller. He's just super lucky.

I learned how to spell the word soliloquy. Everything I had about that word was wrong. That's a tough one. Yeah, we learned it is, in fact, the hardest word to spell in the English language. I think it's the hardest word in English. You know what we did not learn yet? What's that?

Brad's guy. Oh, yeah. We're on it. We're looking into it. You need a new face, Mike. I have a meaning to tell you. Mr. Pitt, let me know. Thank you for listening, goodbye.

Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast. To see what other nonsense the guys are up to, check out spitballerspod.com.