Spitballers Comedy Podcast - Golden Geese & Best Places to Have a Private Party - Spit Hits! - Comedy Podcast

Episode Date: April 2, 2026

Spit Hit for April 2nd, 2026:  On today’s episode we discuss the merits and measurements of golden geese, figure out what to do with yard poopers in Life Advice and wrap things up with a Best Places to Host a Private Party Draft. Re-brand Mondays with some comedy! Subscribe and tell your friends about another funny episode of The Spitballers Comedy Podcast! Connect with the Spitballers Comedy Podcast: Become an Official Spitwad: SpitballersPod.com Follow us on X: x.com/SpitballersPod Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/SpitballersPod Subscribe on YouTube: YouTube.com/Spitballers Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore on realistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the spitballers podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason. Blim-Bin-de-blah, blah, blah, blah. Oh, come on. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Just.

Whoops. Whoops and doozles, everybody. He hit a wall That makes me so happy He's not impervious to the mistake Oh wait I missed oh nope Did you did you guys see The most recent

Failure Of the Star Spangled banner Did you catch this? We had another one? We had a disaster Of that proportion Do they just stop? Oh yeah she messed up a note

in the middle of it. And then she used some language. Into the mic? Yeah. Oh, she goes, oh, I messed it up. Oh, oh, oh, no. And then she resumes. Then she gets to another part that she starts to mess up.

Oh, no. Oh, no. I'm so nervous. Oh, no. Oh, my God. And then she finished it. So I don't know if later on your, yeah, she asked if she can restart, but it was live.

You can hear them going, it's live. And then she just keeps going. outside of pissing your pants in that moment. I don't know that you can do much worse. It's like my kids do theater. I did theater growing up. There's always the thing of like

if you forget your line or whatever. You just got to kind of go on. What happened with your skat was the equivalent of like, I don't remember my line. And you run off stage. You're like, no, nope. I would Ashley Simpson did the, I just did an Irish jig off the side.

But this poor, that poor woman. That makes me feel so bad. But also, like, what? I'm trying to think. How do you phrase the question? As a musician, right? I know that there's a little, like you can get like,

hey, I'm singing the anthem to open the Super Bowl. Okay, that one I get. There's so many eyes on you. That's massive publicity. But like for, for, you're saying upside, what's the upside? What do you stand to gain? except for at the done, at the end of it, you're like, thank God I made it through, and that is done.

Oh, no, there's some, I mean, that is, that's an all-time achievement award. That's like, what do you stand to gain at throwing out a ball at the beginning of a baseball game? You can mess up. You can go out there and you can throw out the first pitch. It's like, I can screw up the best case scenarios I just complete it. But the thing is, is I say, I got to throw out the first pitch. Yeah, but you know what? You wouldn't do that.

You wouldn't, like, turn your life upside down to go throw the first pitch out at a single-A baseball game. you do it at an MLB game. Of course, I'm way too big for us. Come on, man. But like this singer was like some C-SPAN political event that she's the one singing for. I'm just saying, do you let, do you get to trade in? Like, can you trade in five small performances for one medium performance? And can you do five mediums to get to a ball game and five ball games for the Super Bowl?

Or what? How's that work? It's an incredibly, if you don't sing. It's a hard song to sing. It's an incredibly difficult song. and having to do it. And then nerves. And a cappella scared out of your mind and you're in a, I mean,

you might be in an uncontrolled environment for what, how are you hearing yourself? Things can go wrong. I'm just saying there's, there is very little to game. And if you're out of ballgame, the speakers are always delayed. Exactly. You're getting the slap back of the sound. So you've got to nail it with like a monitor, right? Oh, yeah.

I assume most of them have in ears, but just overall like, oh no, I messed up. Like the downs. I guess there's some upside, but I just, I'm weighing. Everything is risk-reward. The risk of something going really wrong is so much higher than something going right. And then a good benefit to your life. You could 4D chess the thing and mess it up on purpose and get this kind of publicity. Oh, yeah, catapult yourself to whatever kind of fame you can grasp. But I've always wondered this. It's been a genuine question. Like, if all the people, the halftime performance. or the National Anthem singer.

They got to get free tickets to the event, right? They're not just like, okay, you come in through the back door and then you leave and you don't get to watch. Oh, you think they do it for the ticket. But I'm wondering what that ticket is. Because could you imagine if it's like super nosebleed and you go down and you see the national anthem. Hers became nosebleed.

You sing the National Anthem. Yeah, it's based off of how good you do. You're up there. You're up there in the city. We've got 12 seats from top to bottom. And you got 12 notes. you got a hit so but but i feel like if i was in the cheap seats the top row of the upper deck and whatever and i'm at i'm at this game or whatnot and then about five minutes after the game

starts you know he comes walking up the the person who's saying the national anthem and comes and sits next to me i'd be like oh man they did you dirty yeah okay you you did really good oh that would be i think the national anthem singing that must just be like one of the benchmarks of a singer. Like if you have the opportunity to do that, you do it because you're a singer. For sure. Like, I know my kids would love to sing the national anthem at any kind of, they don't like baseball because they're smart.

And they would. When we had that, we, it was the COVID year, but we were actually supposed to throw out the first pitch at a Diamondback team. We were. The three of us. We were scheduled. And it was on the calendar and then COVID hit and, you know, our chance for publicity went out the door. But I thought many times, like,

I was going to fire a laser strike. What can the three of us do to get on SportsCenter? That's what my thought process was. It wasn't can we throw three strikes. It was, what can I do to get on sports center? What could we come up with? Throwing out the first pitch? I mean, we would have to do like a full three stooges.

The worst pitches. I'd swap the ball for a tomato. You know what I mean? I'd get that ball and wind up and reaching that pocket. It's not 1931. Reaching that pocket. Get a, okay, an onion. I don't know.

What do you want? Wait, is it's better? Tomatoes are old in class. Throwing fruit with an old-school thing in my head. All right. Moving forward. What is that a tomato? Would you rather?

I see people throwing tomatoes at like old street performers in medieval times. Yeah. That's what I was thinking about. The dude is in the, I don't know what, the marionette or Josh, Josh, how about the, your head and your hands are through the wood. Stocks. Yeah, you remember those. Yeah, you get.

Um, but we turn to the Josh for the medieval. I feel like Josh is my reign of trivia guy. Yeah, that's fair. I feel when I think of, you know, tomatoes being thrown, I, I only think of Fazi. Is that what his name is? Waka Waka Waka. Did he throw a tomato? That's not medieval times.

He is more like a banana, banana cream pie. No, he's tomatoes. It's like always tomatoes. Okay. He got that from the Middle Ages. All right. Would you rather? Cedric from Patreon.

The local wizard just shortened. He's back. Shortened Earth's years by one month. So it's an 11-month year. Which month would you rather get rid of? July or August. Oh. So we, okay, that's weird.

It's weird because you're naming two very similar months. Why isn't this just which month would you get rid of? Or even if it's like totally different seasons where it's like, do you want to get rid of November? Cut a month of the season. Or, you know, June. And it's like, oh, yeah, the hot or the cold. This is like, you want... This is our two months of Inferno and Arizona.

July and August. Just pure, yeah, Mount Doom from... Lordor. Can we just combine that? Can we say both? That'd be great. Yes, please is the answer? I will say this.

For children, those are the two months, a month and a half that they have off from school. They'd keep July. So they would keep July and they'd get rid of August. July also has a national holiday. August has none. August for us and you know this question is posed to us. The wizard isn't asking anyone. You know, he's asking us three gentlemen and man, August is a busy month for us.

Yeah, we go to five shows a week on the main footballers and cut out of work a little early. Cut that out. Man, that's a hard month. The paychecks are going to be the same without August. That's a good point. That's a good point. Yeah, I mean, weather wise July is out for me. You would get rid of July? Yeah. July. I feel like August is always worse. I think they're identical. I could not tell you which month is worth. I think July is hotter, slightly hotter. I mean, we just had that run of 100.10 degrees.

August is where you set the record. You started in July. Yeah, but it's hotter in July to me, but we still get a bit of the monsoon weather. So it's humid and muggy in the desert, but it's also 110 degrees. But it never actually rains. It never actually rains. I think the thing is, is by August you're just even more sick of it. So you're just feeling the mental burden of nonstop heat in a place where human beings shouldn't live.

July is technically one degree hotter, one degree hotter than August historically. But again, I thought you were saying August was worse. No, no, no, he was saying July. This is rather myopic. I mean, we're in Arizona. If you could just objectively, let's go for other reasons other than temperature. For a moment, let's examine. 12 months of the year, one of them's got to go.

Are there other pragmatic reasons? Like obviously if you ditched December, it'd be less expensive, you know, or whatever. It is a 30, 30 day, right? Dude, I don't know. I got to do the knuckles. Wait, hold on, hold on. April, June and. The knuckle trick where you count your knuckles.

I know that that exists. April, May, June, July. You got a, oh, wait, no. You got a knuckle to knuckle. Yeah, August. It's August 31st. They both have 31. Okay, so I wanted to ask.

Yes. There's six of us in this room, three ducers, three, you know, real men here. How many of us know how to do the knuckle trick to count how many days? I do. Okay, so Mike and Andy both say they know how. Even though you just gave an example of, it seemed like you had no idea what you did. I said you got a knuckle and together. He was saying double, but the way I do it is one hand and I double count.

Or as in like I go one direction. If you do it like this, it works. And then I start from the edge and go back. Okay. So we're doing the same thing. But what's the point of your inquiry? I just was curious because I never learned that. And I see people do that to know how many days are in a month.

It's not complicated. Put your fist together. You're done. You're done. I'm not done. I don't know what to count. You just count the knuckles. One, two, three.

No, no. I see eight knuckles. Okay. Start with the beginning of the year. The higher knuckle means 31 days. Okay. So January will be 31. Yeah.

And then lower means it's not, it's either 30 or in February's case 28. Okay. It's the lower. But I've still got to know how many days are in that month. No. in February because it's not that you can learn. Oh, that's the one. This is not easy, gentlemen.

Everything else is 30 or 31. Sure it is. I give up at two. Well, sometimes it's 29. How old are you 50? You had 40 something years to learn how many days is in February. I don't need any because I just go, hey Siri, how many days are. Oh, my gosh.

I mean, why do you need to have Siri 15 years ago? This whole idea that you didn't need to know how many days were the month 15 years ago. You shouldn't know anything because we can find the information. No, that's legit. No. Yes, it is fully legit. You could have found stuff when you were a kid with the encyclopedia, but that would have taken word. Andy, how well do you know your multiplication facts right now?

Perfectly. Very well. Perfect. Okay. Eight times six? 48. That's correct. Seven times three.

No, that's easy. Okay. I'm trying to give you. Keep swinging. Up to 12. I'm pretty good. But are you saying that it's important in today's day and age that you know, you know, your multiple case.

It's helpful, yeah. It's kind of like a, if you have little bits of information all over the place, it creates a web of what we call intelligence. Tell me more. And knowing things and being intelligent does aid you at times. Stay in school, kids. But use Siri if you need to.

All right. Is there another reason to get rid of another month? Those two, I have no other idea. I'd get rid of, if you want one, get rid of February. Then you know that every month is at least, 30 or 31. Maybe that'll straighten it out for that, but it's so nice. Can we borrow a day? Can February like, oh, can we, why are we some 30 and 31? Take the double knuckles in the middle, make July and August just 30 each and then February becomes 30. But then the knuckles don't work.

No, you don't need the knuckles thing. I mean, that's what I've been saying. You got Google. You don't need enough. Where am I? And what time is it? If we actually do some averaging out, Can you work it up so that it's like we get February up to 30 and then a couple and then the three months in the summer have 31 or something? Does that mathematically work? Does anybody know? Nobody knows who made the months. So we're not allowed to petition. That was the Mayans.

The least popular month for tourism in the entire year. Do you want to know what that is? Is this in the United States? This is in the United States. The least popular month for activities. Okay. Do you know the month? Can I guess?

That is the inquiry. I would say September. Okay, Mike, do you want to take your shot? That's a really good guess. Thanks, man. January? It is January. My guess was better.

People start cold weather. Yeah, it's all new budgets. Yeah. And people just spent money. Yeah, they just did all the Christmas travels. Oh, that's true. They can't leave. They've got a new routine.

They're going to stick. with this year. All right. Next question. Amanda from Twitter, would you rather have Scooby-Doo or Brian Griffin as your family pet? That. Brian Griffin's the dog from family guy. That is easy. I mean, the talking one. Oh, they both talk. One of them is annoying. Well, which was annoying? That one. I mean, Scooby-Doo. I don't understand how that cartoon was ever popular or enjoyed. The whole thing is

I mean it might as well be Olden days door of the explorer It's just so, the characters are annoying It's just not It's not a pleasurable cartoon Got in on shaggy Zoinks? Yeah, exactly

He's just annoying to me Those two They're supposed to be lovable and funny Yeah, they are It might be lovable They're not funny They're just not funny They're just annoying

Well there are a handful of shows As a kid that were popular That I just didn't really understand Why they were Is that one of them? Is that one of them? Yeah. The Muppets are another one.

Well, Scooby-Doo was, we were, I think we were too old for Scooby-Doo. Like, when did that actually stop? The original Scooby-Doo. So, like, Josh must have been into it. Yeah, for sure. Josh, did you like Scooby-Doo? It was okay. Yeah.

But I'm saying. That's his way of saying, dude, I watch that every day. I think Scooby-Doo reruns were going on while our new cartoons, they were showing it to us. But if, for in terms of it wasn't funny, because that show was old. It might have been funny. humor changes. So there may be, it may have been a time

that Scooby-Doo was funny to kids. That's fair. But then we, yeah, you know what happened? Ninja Turtles and Transformers showed up and we're like, Scooby-Doo,

that dude sucks. Things got funnier. And then old funny was like, well, that's lame. And it's old. I mean, stuff for kids has to age rapidly.

Yeah. Okay. Well, you know, I didn't really connect with either of these. So I guess I'll just take Scooby-Doo because I feel like he solves problems.

and I don't think Brian Griffin does that. Oh, Brian Griffin. He's genius. Yeah, he could probably be, make you feel real bad. About yourself? Yeah. Yeah. Just a little, little.

I'll go Scooby. A little like a fake sophistication. I'll take Scooby out back behind the shed. All right. Oh, come on. All right. I'm keeping Scooby. Eli from the website.

That's a loyal companion, Jason, would you rather be able to collect the pot of gold at the end of any rainbow you see? Okay. Or have a goose that lays golden eggs. Oh, that is an easy goose. How many eggs does a goose lay per year? I would guess. And how big is a pot?

Yeah, the pot of gold, that's a great question. It's not, you know, it takes time to drive to a place that's going to convert gold into money. So I'm going to, if I have a goose dropping it, I can't spin the eggs at the store. So I got to take the eggs to a gold conversion place, right? That turns them into money? You want to know where the end of the rainbow is, not on the roads. It doesn't just end on an adventure. You've got to find it.

And it's way over there. Yeah, but I mean. And honestly, I don't think you can ever get there. I think that's the point. Like, the way that the light works. In this one, you can. Yes, Jason. You can't get to the bottom of a rainbow and look up and see the rest of the.

That is 100% the point. You can never actually get to the edge of a rainbow. Exactly. Because it's just perspective where you're standing. And here, I'm going to throw this out there, Jay, because, again, knowledge. I'm not sure that geese can lay golden eggs. So we're going to pretend both of them are true for this question. They do lay eggs.

Here's the thing. Let's say now I've got to invest in some off-road vehicle, right? I've got to buy something. Yeah, you've got money in before you can get money out. Exactly. But then, but it's a pot. But that's the problem. I get there, right?

And there's this giant pot. of gold. But what is, how am I loading that up? How am I lifting that into my vehicle? Buy the right vehicle. Yeah. What is it got?

Bring a trailer. But you still got to get it up off the ground. You ever lifted a pot full of gold? Okay, hire a guy. You've got a pot of gold, man. You're going to need a trailer and you're going to have to get a bobcat. Yeah, you're going to have to jack the thing up. But it's so much investment to get started.

But I'm saying, we always say it's a pot of gold, but then the legend, at least for us, dumb Americans, oh, oh, it's a leprechaun. Well, is it a, is it a, is it a, is it a, is it a, is it a, pot of gold sized for a leprechaun? Because that would be a gold coin. Well, I bet you can pick it up. Yeah, that would not be a problem. I was put that thing in my pocket.

That doesn't have value. From what I understand, from my very advanced research, I just did, if you assume that at the end of the rainbow, there is a large cauldron, that pot, right? It looks like a cauldron, a pot. According to my sources, they think that would hold about 8,000 pounds of gold. Good luck. Yeah.

How are you getting that on the... So listen, the practical of getting that, that would be worth... I'm getting the current price of gold right now. Canadian geese... $245 million of gold. Does that change your little... Ooh, I've got a little bit of an issue getting it to sell it.

Canadian geese lay one egg every one to two days. During laying season is what I'm seeing. So it says geese lay around 20 to 50 eggs per season. Chinese geese can lay up to 90 to 100 eggs. Okay. Per year. Okay. You ain't getting no Chinese goose, man.

I'm getting a golden goose. It's got to be better. I think I'm going to be a golden egg. I'm looking into it right now. Unfortunately, I got the actual cost of a goose egg, which is three to $10. Hold on. How much is a... A goose?

Or how big. I've got the density of it all. We've got to go volume into weight. Wait into value. Here we go. A goose egg is worth about $133,000. Just a goose egg? That's a crop getting a goose.

I got to get a goose and geese, man. Dude, now I know how people. I just told you those are $3 to $10. This is $133,000 for a golden goose egg. Or $245 million. I only have to do the work. What? How many rainbows do we get in per year?

What's the rainbow per year in Arizona? to one? I think you only get one rainbow. What, Al, Al, will you help us? I thought in this question The question says every rainbow you see, but the math would, I would say we could alter the question to one rainbow. One rainbow or

unlimited eggs? Bird in hand versus bird in the bush. Okay, so then you've got to take these eggs. You got daily work or you got work one time? I'm doing. I got daily excitement, man. Oh, is you going to lay one? Yep. Do you think, yep?

No, I'd be opening that little egg crate and I'd go. Okay. All right. It would take 1,831 golden goose eggs to equal the weight of the gold in the large cauldron. Okay. Okay. So like what? What's that three or four years?

1,000. How many do they weigh? Let's just say 50. Or I mean, how many do they lay per year? 50 eggs per year. Yeah, let's go 50 eggs. Okay. This is why you learn how to do that.

36.62. Years. Years. Or as you said, a couple. A couple years. Just a couple here there. Thanks, Siri. I'm going to go with the rainbow.

I'll take the rainbow. I'm going to rainbow. All right. We'll take a break. We'll get into some life advice. Spitmallers to the rescue. I was searching for the button. I was looking.

I was looking for the button. I found it. Because we're getting serious. So I don't want to, you know, when we give. Not hit the button. When we give life advice, we want to really take this show down or not. It's saying about golden geese. It's saying about rainbows.

It was. About helping people with everyday situations that are serious. And I think this is a good time that we do that. Yeah. So just stop laughing. We appreciate you writing in and sharing whatever difficulty you're going through. We are here for you. And that's why we'll turn to Denise.

All right. Denise, what can we help you? This is probably hard for her to write in. Let me, let me be good. Thank you for your bravery, Denise. My husband and I have been noticing Frequent dog poop in our front yard Very serious

Front yard Every time we remove it Another dump shows up It's good that it's dog poop though Now we don't have a dog Denise doesn't have a dog So we installed a ring cam To see where it's coming from

Turns out it is our next door neighbor Their dog They're going to assume their dog Because it said it's dog poop Every morning she walks out of her house right over to our grass where her dog poops and peeve. Okay. Okay.

Otherwise, that ring video is a problem. They then continue on their morning walk. What is the best way to approach this? The neighbor has a poop habit with their own pet. Oh, this is, I feel like there's an easy first step. I mean, I don't know that it will solve your problem. What I would do, Mr. Non-Confrontation. Is anyone that is doing a daily dog walk in the morning, you know that that is at a

time right there is there is a you know they wake up at six they have their coffee it's usually on a schedule it's 630 is when they walk the dog so i would look back day after day after day and say oh they they get there around 832 in the morning so about 833 in the morning is when my sprinklers be coming on oh you know what i mean enjoy you want to wet the poop then i want to before they get there oh that's maybe smarter he did a minute after for some i wanted to do wet the poop i wanted to I wanted to have the lady and the dog get soaked. Well, but is the lady going in the grass? Motion sensor sprinklers.

Okay. All right. That's a better idea. Motion floodlights. Would that be enough? I guess not if it's bright outside. Wouldn't do much. But if it's still early in the morning, you know, trying to sneak that poop.

You're in rare form today, Jay. Listen, this is not okay. that your neighbor's not. If the neighbor's dog does poop in the yard, pick it up yourself. Don't leave the poop for the owner of the yard to have to clean up. Could you install? You know, you go to like the little community field. There's always that like post with the dog disposal.

It's got the little bags and the little trash can. Can you just install it? You can, but you're basically saying please poop here. I think if my dog was constantly doing that. and then the next day I walk and I see that there. I'd be like, thank you. Oh, I would. Thanks for the convenient bag.

I'd start, they don't want the bag, obviously. They want to leave it. Maybe they did. Maybe they can't afford it. Maybe they think they're doing something nice. Maybe they're like the fertilizer. This helps the yard. If you don't clean the poop up, how many piles, like how big will the pile get?

Because if the dog always poops there, will there be like two, three, four? Like, there'll be multiple piles. And the neighbor will never clean it up. No, this neighbor is, uh, is, uh, is. Not a kind neighbor. So then you poop in their yard, alternatively. The petty thing to do is, is every, you get yourself a good size box. Yep.

You put every one of these dog poops in the box. And then holiday season rolls around. You wrap that thing up. Ding dong. See, I started out agreeing there's not the direction I was going. I said it was petty, but you just ring the doorbell. You leave that box there. There's a lot of problem for yourself, though.

You're hoarding poop for a season. No, don't hoard. Just use an instrument every day. Scoop it up with the little shovel, walk it five feet over, and turn it over. Well, but it might not be the next door neighbor. It might be a neighbor from down the street. You know what I mean? Like, I don't want to walk down the street with two.

Then I'm tracking this person to find their house. Can you put little like mouse traps throughout the yard? Oh, that's cruel. It's not the dog's my yard, bro. But it's not the dog's fault. It's the human. Yeah, it is the human. The dog's just doing dog business.

Isn't there stuff you can spray on the yard until, to make the dog not want to be there? Yeah, but that doesn't work in my experience. Rat poison works. Okay, yeah. Yeah, but I thought this wasn't the dog's fault. That's what Mike says. I just want a way to like punish the dog's owner.

Yes. And I like the sprinklers. I think if you just got to make sure you're not just watering the poop after. So if you're gone. If you sprinkle before they come and you soak the yard, I don't think that the dog owner, will want the dog going in there. There's no way, though, that the,

that this dog is pooping at the same time every day on the exact moment. It's going to be pretty close, though. I mean, you're talking, what, 15, 20 minute? Yeah, so back to my idea of the box. Okay, go on. Okay. Because they're going to bring it in the house

and they're going to open it. Oh, you're leaving. You're wrapping it. Yes. I'm sorry. I didn't understand that. Yes, holiday season rolls. I wrap this thing up nice, like a big present.

And they get, oh, Secret. Santa showed up. They're going to bring it in. They're going to open it. It's going to be poop. I don't know if you've ever had a bag of poop in your life, Mike. If you've cleaned up poop from your yard and you fill a bag and you've got to take that up, just walking that bag to the dumpster is barely doable. If you're telling me that I'm going to sit with a box right in front of my lap and I'm you know how long it takes me to wrap a package and I'm going to have to wrap that stinky box up? That's not happening. You got to put the work in if you want to get them back. I'm finding a whole new way to get him back.

I'm putting something over the fence that has nothing to do with dogs. What if you burn their house down? That's real easy. I can't imagine letting my dog poop in someone's yard. No, it's, that's a horrific human being. Those people. Horrific. Shouldn't be around.

What if you just put a sign in your yard for a week? You just nail a little sign. It says no dog poop's allowed from bad neighbors. What if they think they're a good neighbor? Yeah, they definitely do. going to bypass a sign. But if it says bad neighbors, so you just got to say no dog poops allowed? Or any poops.

You could broaden them. There's got to be some way that we can collect all the bad people and all the neighborhoods and make them all live in one neighborhood together. They can all poop in each other's yards. I mean, imagine the worst person in every neighborhood, all living together in a new neighborhood and filming it for television. I think we're on. I'm trying to find out if there's at least.

recourse. Well, you're not allowed to set booby traps. I know that's illegal. Really? Yes. Even on your own property? No, that's not illegal. I think it is. What if they're funny? Papa Josh says yes because he's probably thought about it. Wait, what, like home alone style booby traps? You can't booby trap your property at all. Yes, you can. I mean, home alone's thought, well, like a paint can flying down and hitting them in the face. Yeah, exactly. A little, little hot iron action. No, there's no way it's illegal to boobie. I mean, you've seen this with political signs. Have you seen this?

Oh, yeah, where they like electric, they electrify the political signs because people are stealing from the yard? I saw one that was even more advanced. This person was on a main road and they had a sign that was within, like a car could easily turn to the right, run it over. And then go back. And they put strips to pop the tires. And people would go to run over this political sign. Good for them. And then the person would end up popping their tire.

Good for that's not. As they run over the sun. That should not be illegal. You want to drive through my yard. You should have the tires pop. I'm on your side. I think to some degree you should not be able to go in and do it. Someone left a broken bottle there.

What am I going to do about it? I'm thinking you've got to... Doing so is illegal under U.S. law. Come on, man. Yeah, that's dumb. I thought this was America. I thought this was America. Good goof.

Land of the free. Can't booby trap my own yard? I think the rule is that you're only allowed to defend with reasonable and justified levels of force. Yeah. Hot iron. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. A paint can. It's reasonable.

I'm not putting a shotgun. I'm not putting a shotgun like you open the door and you get blasted in the chest. That is what the court case was. Real? Yeah. Well, yeah, that makes sense. That's called murder. That should be supes illegal.

We're just talking about facial reconstruction surgery. Yeah, we're talking about you reach for that doorknob. It's on fire. Ironically, in that court case, the court noted that it would have been justified to shoot the person with the shotgun, had the person been home at the time of the intrusion. What? But rigging up the booby trap is illegal. Okay, I'm back to unhappy with that ruling.

That's fair because it's not a danger to you if you're not there. Oh my gosh. So what if you're a shotgun is coming into the picture with the dog? What if you're on a ring doorbell system and your alarm system and you've got a booby trap set up, but you see the intruder. Now I'm like, I'm taking part of this. Are you in danger? Nope.

My stuff is. I don't know, man. Mr. TV is in great danger right now. Yes. What if I'm on the TV? You know what I mean? Right. I'm watching them.

I'm like, please leave. And they're like, no. And they start reaching to like they're going to punch the TV. Blow. You know? You got to take care of business. All right. All right.

Also, you could just talk. You're welcome. You just talk to the neighbor. You can just ask me not to do that. Yeah, no poo on my yard. Talk to the neighbor. It would be funny if you put a fence up, but only for that corner of the yard like it doesn't go across the whole front yard it's just a corner of the fence all right

glad we could help you what if you put like a little square patch of grass out on the sidewalk in front to help it says like poop here i don't think now that i think about that i don't want that poop piece of grass in my sidewalk so all right that didn't work just talk to the neighbor all right dave from patreon with a question for us my co-worker constantly listens to music at their desk with a Bluetooth speaker and it's driving me crazy. How do I ask them to keep it down without coming off as the office grump? Dude, when there are distractions in an office place, they can get out of control. Whoa, what are we talking about here?

Who are you talking about? I have no idea. But if you go to the dozers cam, someone's eyes are pretty big. Why? Who's been doing the distracting? Oh, man. Straction A and distraction B over there? That's true.

honestly Falcon you you might not start the conversation okay Papa Josh is the is catalyst catalyst and the primary cause of distraction in the office work environment but should he start I mean you I'm letting you go you two guys he's like the will feral impression of Harry Carey just like he's he think the moon's made of cheese and it's like Josh which is the place of business we're trying to get stuff done But would you eat it? But now there's a whole conversation about it's the moon made out of cheese. Oh, man.

Also, I mean, I think. How do you do this? So can you start by saying turn it down? You can, but check this out. It's a little bit of mischief, but then you make up for it. Okay. What if you sabotage the Bluetooth speaker? How?

Drop it in water. I don't know. Just make it not function anymore. Okay. And then they go to use it and then they're all mad that their Bluetooth speaker. I know where you're going. And then the next day you're like, hey, man, I'm, I heard you. The speaker, I knew you were really upset. So I bought you these headphones. Oh, yeah. Some AirPods pros, baby. I bought, yeah. I spared no expense. I got you. They're noise cancelling and everything. I like listening to it out loud, but thank you. I'll still take these. It's all right. I already replaced my Bluetooth speaker.

Yeah, thank you so much. Give me those back because I need the noise cancellation because you're too loud. This is the same kind of people that live in that stupid neighborhood. I mean, if you don't have awareness for the people around you, it is just, you know who else lives in that neighborhood? The people, when I walk up at a movie theater to order popcorn and they work for the movie theater. And there's no one else in the line. And I'm standing at that thing and they're just turned around and they're talking to each other or they're like doing something and they don't come up and take my order. That gets you real peeved, huh? It's insane.

It's insanity. You're at that age now where you get real. I've been this way my whole life. It's insanity when somebody is... Can somebody get in on this with me? Why is it only moving? Stop Gavin, you got a job to do. You don't want your jibber jibber.

It's because if I was them, I could never do that. If I saw a person waiting, it would be impossible for me not to go over and help. I'll bet when you were a teenager. You thought the same way you think now, but oftentimes didn't realize you were having a good time talking to your buddy and didn't see someone. Look, I'd go help them if I weren't having such a good time. That's nice if you might. I'm going to just start getting my own popcorn. Just walk back there.

Excuse me one second. Another option. Sing along with every song and see how long that songs last. So I would think if this is, you're trying to teach, right? You want them to turn your music off, but this is a learning opportunity too. And you might have to sacrifice a little bit here, but I would just make sure you get there first and get your Bluetooth speaker on prior to theirs.

Established dominance? So you're taking the armrest. 100%. This is my armrest. And so if you, here's what I know you can't do. Like, if someone's playing Bluetooth music next to you, you're not going to put a Bluetooth music on yourself.

It'll just sound awful and upsetting. And so whoever, whoever establishes dominance first, they control it. So if you put your speaker on, now your neighbor's going, well, that's so rude. And they will learn. I hope.

They will not. No, you'll just have shown them that it's okay to do that. Yeah. Terrible offer. They will not learn. I have another idea. Okay. What if you got,

so I don't know how you would. I don't know how it would work with Bluetooth, but just figure out a way that you can get another, like a remote or something paired to the Bluetooth speaker. And then you just keep turning it up overly loud. So other people come over and say. Yeah. So that other people start getting, or HR has to get involved with like,

do like Bob over here keeps playing his music way too loud and then before you know it Bluetooth speakers are banished. Alternatively. Oh, yeah? Just talk to him. Oh, you could talk to him. Well, yeah. But if you want to just find a way to cope with what you're having to deal with, I did,

I learned this on this podcast, many episodes ago, Mike, I believe you brought an article to our attention. You could pour water in their bag when they're not looking. So if I would say if you're a government. worker and you're a duly elected official and you're upset with something you could just behind their back start pouring water in their bag or purse every day for months just poured water I've forgotten all about that so you know there's a lot of different ways you can do with this but probably just talk to him or the water one they felt so bad once they got caught

because because you just got caught for months pouring water in a colleague's bag it's ridiculous us. Liam from Patreon said, my friend always wants to split the bill 50-50 when we eat out, which is, by the way, super easy to do. It's the easiest thing. Just split it down the middle, right?

You can tell the server. But there's issues. But they always order way more than I do. Exactly. How do I suggest that we pay for our own order without causing awkwardness or calling them an overeater? Oh, you just got to order more, bro.

I mean, this is a contest now. This is a pissing contest. And you're going to do it up. Like, Liam, I don't know if you like lobster, but you do now. Mm-hmm. You like lobster and you love surfing, surf. If you see MP on the menu, okay, that means must purchase, okay? That's not market price.

That's much purchase. And eventually here, but. Oh, I can't stop myself. It's just so good. We're splitting this, right? I mean, just like always, right? I'll take the caviar. Be two people.

You're going to teach him a lesson soon. enough. And in the meantime, you're getting great stuff out of it. Have you been in this situation where you were unhappy that somebody wanted a 50-50? I have not been in this situation. I have definitely many times as a teenager got stuck with the, where the group goes. And everyone's like, here's my contribution to the bill. Oh, and it's not close. And then they bail. And you're like, there's tax and tip. And there's like this. I spent $10 on my meal. So here is $10. Oh, yeah, that sounds teenage.

And then the bill shows up and you're like, we are short $30. The problem that happens is what it's a group and everyone chips in with their cash. And then at the end, it's like the whole bill was like $300. And then at the very end, you've got $120 for like eight other people. Exactly. They're like, um, yeah. And they all leave. Yeah.

I've had that happen several times. Do you guys have the family member that won't let you pay for things? Yeah. Like just absolutely like it's like oh I got this and they'll like never it was they won't let you they won't let you pay it's like you're pooping on their yard are you complaining right now well no no I'm trying to read the tone of your voice because you're like hey you you ever got this buddy all he doesn't just pay for all of your stuff whenever we go out it's awesome no no no I think he's got a family member that won't let him pay for them yeah but at my point is that's awesome oh yeah I got you I got is the issue I don't know I don't know I I think it is, I believe, this is not a joke. I believe it is a good thing to be able to accept kindness as well. And so sometimes people have a hard time. They will give kindness, but they would not.

Sounds like you're having a real hard time accepting their kindness. It does. It does. Okay, that is completely fair in this single example. I agree. So maybe I should work on that. But I think all people should work on that. It's okay to accept kindness, except help.

Yeah, you never want to be in the situation where, like, a pride thing why you can't accept again. I have gotten to the point where, like, I'm, look, if we go out and, you know, like, I'm, I'll pay. Like, hey, I got it. And then if they do the, oh, no, no, no, no thing, that's the end. Yeah. That is the end of the conversation.

You're not going to do the insist. We're not playing the game. Oh, no, I insist. No, no. The game is done. If I have offered to pay and you jump in and say, no, no, I want. Oh, okay, then here's what you're paying. I am 100.

That game is done. thousand percent. Get that out of my. That ain't Mike's game for sure. No, I think it's right. Like, you can offer to pay. And if they say, no, I don't want you to, then you should not pay. Yeah. And then it's almost, you're like, I'm calling your bluff. Have you ever had somebody that just goes, why don't you pay? You got it this time, right? Now, this question comes. I got the last one, didn't I? This question comes in from Jason on set. What if that is your stance, but then your wife is always completely adamant that you pay? And so now there's like this fight between like, hypothetically?

Yeah, of course. Hypothetical situation where it's like, you're willing to pay? Have you gone to the server like secretly before? Oh, many times. Yeah. Because it's take care of the, put this card on file and let's make sure the bill's taken care. Yeah, exactly. I've done that.

Sometimes you have to depending on the situation. Yeah, because you've got to let the family know that I'm better than you. I'm going to pay for everything. That's why they turn it down. That's why they turn it down. No, Mike, I agree. That's what I feel like it portrays sometimes. Yeah, that's why I do it. You get, well, you guys do it because you're kind?

No. Yeah, it's, it's funny. Paying and splitting bills. To the restaurant where I'm better. Yeah, paying and splitting bills is always that like, that awkward end to the meal. If it wasn't just clearly established in the beginning where you go, oh, this was nice. There's a second awkwardness. What are we doing here?

If you let it known beforehand that you're paying, it prohibits them from ordering what they want some money. For sure. You got to pay at the end. You don't unless it's beforehand like, hey, my treat, I'm going to take you out to something. No, but if you say that, sometimes people will seriously not order stuff just to prevent you. That's on them. Accept the kindness.

Be generous. Accept generosity. There you go. Great quote. Do you guys buying? No, man, you are. We accept your generosity today. All right.

We'll take a break. be back with our draft. The Spitballers Draft. All right, we are drafting the best places to host a private party. This could be anywhere on earth. Anywhere you want to have a party that would be very cool. In fact, before Mike takes his first pick, I remember. I know.

And that stinks because it's the 101 and I want it. And if we were in reverse order here and Andy started it came to me, I'd have it. Go ahead, Mike. I'll tell the story later. Oh, sorry. No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no.

I insist you tell your story. You, your story, Andy. All I was going to say was that one time in high school, the prom was not at like an empty amphitheater. It was at a science center. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's pretty common here. And it was, you know, a prom is a party. And it was like, cool to have stuff around that you could look at or see.

So there are places where it would be very novel and neat to have a party. That's all I was doing. Arizona Science Center? Yes, sir. Yeah, I went to one prom for someone else at school, and that's where we were. It's fantastic. So the bad news of having the 101 means that the, that legendary scat I did went out there. Great news is I have the first pick for this one.

So it's Disneyland, baby. Disneyland. It's not just Disneyland. It's Disneyland after hours. It's having the parks yourself. No, no, we're starting to. So we're starting at the beginning. And we're going to.

Just a solo. You get Disneyland for the day. How unbelievable. I can't imagine. I've thought about like if you're Elon Musk, if you're just a billionaire and you can have enough money to just be like, no, every worker works today. Yeah. We're not going skeleton crew here.

It's me and my friends. Every tour stand is operational. It's like everybody got like snapped and disappeared. Yeah. Yeah. I mean. It's so cool. Yeah.

So that's funny. I didn't think about the whole park. Oh, yeah. I thought about like just a part of the park. So, like, if you... Ooh, you got to think bigger. If you're at this park, are you all, like you and your group? It just seems like so much space.

Oh, yeah. That's part of the... Oh, they'll be so great. Yeah, that's part of the allure. In fact, here, let me show you how it's done. I am, I'm up next. I am not taking the Oval Office. I'm taking the whole White House.

Okay. I get the, I'm partying at the White House. Which other room in the White House do you like? Oh, all of them, man. Lincoln Bedroom. Okay, all right. That's good enough. the whole West Wing.

We're going to, we're going to do it up. So you're taking the White House after Disneyland? Yeah. I want Disney. Which one do you want? Yeah. I wish I could, I would be happy to take California adventures. You'll be like, I'm the president and I'm going to be on Big Thunder Mountain.

You know I'm dressing up as Abe Lincoln. Like you know, for my party in the White House, I got the top hat and the beard on. Oh, my bedroom is still here. Oh. Too soon, Andy. The next pick I'm going to go I got a double

A double selection here Number one Again To me this is I got the invitation It shows up It's got White House on it That's awesome

I'm going to the White House For a party You know where I'm going I'm going to Alcatraz Oh that's on my list I'm going to Alcatraz I got to take a boat To get to this party

And then it's all creepy And cool to be done up In a cool prison way Well of course Well yeah I mean, you got to theme the party to the locale. Yeah. I'll hire prisoners to be like at the bars.

I would hire actors, man. I would have just actor. I wouldn't get real prisoners. That's danger to your party. Yeah, it's fair. I won't get real prisoners. Everything here is authentic. 100%.

I wouldn't go in there. See that toothbrush shake? That's real, man. That guy just whittled that down. Watch out. See that crazy guy? He looks like a murderer because he is. Spare no expense.

So come to my party on Alcatraz, and then come to my party, and this isn't the spirit of that old prom at the Science Center. Come to my party at the, I know Jason won't come, but everyone else can't. The Museum of National History. Natural history? Yeah. You said national.

Natural history. Okay. I just wanted to make sure we're talking about the same place. In New York City. The dinosaur place. Yeah, well, more than that, but yeah. There's a giant whale hanging from the. the center of the Museum of National.

How much do you have to... Natural. How much you got to grease the wheels up there to go ride that whale? I feel like... Am I party? Nothing. It's a ride. I was going to say, you wait in line to do it. You wait in line. If you're able to have a private party and you have that whole thing, I'm a lot of...

It's all touchy. I'm a lot of touch other things. It's all touchy. Everything is touching. This is now became an interactive science museum. All the ropes, I'm like, can you move all the ropes outside? It was the museum, right? the movie, the museum?

Night at the museum. Night at the museum. That's what it was. But that's where... With Ben Stiller? That's where the party is, but they don't come alive. Okay. Jason, you are back on the clock. Okay. So,

there's not a lot of cool places left in the world. Wow. I've got most of what I want. So Disneyland, just to be clear, if Disneyland was gone from the world, you would have almost nothing to do. Exactly. Oh, Disney worlds.

Yeah, I mean, Disney World's a little farther. It's really far away, though. And apparently when you try to go, there's usually a hurricane. Yeah, it can be. I mean, you could go to, you could go to Japan to go to Disneyland. Hey, dude, that's, that's number one on my list of Disneyland's to go to. All right. What other touchy places are you drafted? Other touchy places that I'm drafting, which is the draft today. I think I'm not the, go on. I would love, we're football fans. I think having a party at a famous stadium would be really cool, kind of having it all to yourself.

And when I think of famous stadiums, there are two that come to mind. I don't know if it's right or wrong. Like famous, any stadiums at all, I think of Wrigley Field and I think of Lambo. And I'm actually close between them only because if you had a party at Wrigley, I think it would be fun to have a baseball game. And you can't. You can't just like at a party, you can't have a football game. Football games are too dangerous.

Too dangerous, too advanced, too cool. Oh, okay. So you're playing in the game. Yeah, I'm saying like the people at the party can have an impromptu. I was trying to figure out why the players couldn't play during the party, but I got you. You can have a kickball game using the field. You know what I mean? That would be fun.

At the same time, I don't want to put myself in a baseball stadium. So I'm going to take Lambo. Okay. Lambo Field. I'll rent that out. Just pick the right time of year, man. Don't do it in the middle of winter. It will be a nice, cool summer day.

Okay. Okay. Mike, you've got two picks left. All right. So my first pick, I don't know if you guys are aware, but so the, when you visit the Eiffel Tower, there's like, there's the second floor. So it's like this huge area. I looked at it. It's 4,700 square feet.

So it's the second floor of the Eiffel Tower. So you're in your way up there. 4700 square fee is a, it's not a huge party. But, yeah. I mean, me and. Select company. There's like 10 people. Yeah.

10 people hanging out on top of these. Didn't know that. Didn't know you could go up in it. Yeah. And you can, I mean, you can climb up to the top two if you. want, but there's, there's a big enough area that you can hang out there and have a good, oh yeah. Like if the drinks are flowing or people, there's glass and stuff, like to keep you from.

Well, there's also edges. Ah. I'd look up for those. Yeah, that's what I was talking about. Yeah, well, we'll just have to take precautions to make sure that people. So the Eiffel Tower. That's pretty dope. Yeah, so you're, you're way up there.

And speaking of way up there. Uh-oh. You got to take a ride to get up to this next one. I will have my party on the I-S-S everybody. Oh, I thought for sure I'd get that on my last pick. space station. I mean, that is, that's probably the 101. Like, DigitalLand is cool, but I thought that that would not go drafted because, you know,

like Andy started saying, anywhere on Earth, and I was thinking, hmm. Low orbit. Yeah, I'm not on Earth. The biggest, the biggest problem is I didn't know what the, like, it's on my list, it would have been picked, but I didn't know what the square footage would be like. Yeah, I don't care if it's two people. Yeah. Honestly, when I have a party, that's, you know,

usually the amount of people I want to invite. So this is all the way around. It's perfect. It just feels like it might be easy to be late to that part. You know what I mean? You got a really time thing. I don't think you can be late. I think,

well, if you miss your flight, you're going to have to wait a month or so. Yeah, for sure. For another launch window. But I do think that they are, they don't, I think they're on a pretty tight schedule with those rockets. All right.

So am I back up? You are. All right. Space Station is gone. Darn it. I'm, I'm about 3,900. square feet if you kind of

That's not bad. But it's all tubular. It's all tight quarters. Okay, so there's one that maybe I could definitely see Andy enjoying it. It might be on his list, but I'm going to play the game see if it comes back to me. I'm going to

take a luxury yacht. I've never been on one. But you can make some assumptions. That is not bad. I can make some pretty clear assumptions based on you know, all the photo of awesome yacht parties, that that'd be cool. I'm out on the ocean, just watching dolphins swim and having a great time,

having a party on a yacht. I never thought I'd be on a boat. What is the, Andy, like the dolphins? I did, I did. Because I just feel like there's got to be a bit where Jason just talks about what stuff is. It's just what stuff is, two minutes with Jason. Stuff there's out there.

I'll be seeing dolphins. and like they'll be like glistening on the ocean. I can smell the waves and the ocean and kind of the peepee water. The ocean kind of smells like pee. Salty pee. Salty pee. You think an ocean smells like pee? 100%.

Not mine. It does not smell like pee. You know how much pee is in the ocean? You know how many animals are out there excreting? Yeah, they're pooping. That's all of it. I mean, I was trying to be kind, gentlemanly. Do fish?

They poop. Do they urinate? They have to. I don't care. I really care. No, I need to know this. We've got a marine biologist in the house. Papa Josh.

Bob Josh is Googling. Have you ever been peed on by a dolphin? Fish do? Yes. Nice. I think. Interesting. I don't think you're smelling pee though, man.

Yeah. I don't think you are either. Okay. Then seaweed smells like pee. It smells like seaweed. Seweed does smell bad. Yeah. Is it my turn?

Yes. Is it back to me? All right. Step one. Pick three here. I've got Alcatraz in the museum of, natural history. I'm going to go an ice hotel in Sweden.

Dude, it's on my list. An ice hotel? Yeah. The ice hotel. I mean, why not? I mean, that's a dream for me. That seems very, very unique and special and cool. No, it will be awesome.

Literally. to have a party and to feel regal and unique and special. I'm taking Downton Abbey. Oh, that was the pick I wanted to come back to me. Taking down to Abbey the castle because it really exists. There's a castle there? I mean, it's what, I don't know anything about the show. Down Abbey is.

It's just for snobby people. It's great. Downtown Abbey. No, no, no. Downton. Abbey. Grow up. Downton.

Downton. I will post a picture of it. It is a... There's a castle? It is essentially an abbey, but it's a castle. It looks like a castle. Wait, an abbey is a castle? It's not a castle.

I thought Abby was a name. No. There's no ramparts for you to walk. Okay, so it's not a castle. But it's a, it's an old manner that is humongous. There's no moat. All right, that's the pick, man. Yeah, I was going to end up drafting.

That was the pick that I had that I wanted that I thought Andy likes. He would respect it. maybe it'll get back to me. If it got back to me, I would have actually taken the Windsor Castle just because it's bigger and more regal and it's actually a castle. You could have taken Buckingham Palace. You've got taken a million of those. So I'm taking Downton. And I like it.

I like it. The show's great. And that would be fun to be there. Since I don't have that, but I am fancy and we're going to cut it up. We're going to the Sistine Chapel. Oh, right. And we're throwing a party at the Sistine Chapel. Okay.

I get to look at some fancy art, be part of history. and cut it up. That seems to be the big one. Yeah. Cutting it up. That's what you want. Do you take a guess without looking? When do you think that was built?

Give me like the century. Oh, man. Okay. If you get this right, I'll be so impressed that you don't need serious. When was the Sistine Chapel built? Yeah. Let's play a game of who's closest to the guess. That's the one with Michelangelo.

He did the, yeah. So before him. It took eight years. Yeah. So you can get anywhere in that eight years and I'll be happy. If I got within 100 years, I'd be happy. Yeah, if you give it 100 years. I'm going to say the...

I'm going to say the 1,300s. Okay, Mike. I wanted to say the like the 1100s, but now that sounds stupid. But I'll go with that anyways. 1473. Okay. All right. I said 1,300.

I meant 1399. I'm pretty close. That's not bad. That's not bad at all. All right. Yeah, that's not too bad. I didn't know if you were going to say like 1971. All right.

Mike, you get the final pick here. Jason has the White House, the Lambeau Field, luxury yacht with the dolphin swimming around, and the Sistine Chapel. All right. Some of the greatest art in there for the, for my, my final pick here. It's a little tough because I can't actually tell you where the party would take place, like what room, but we would figure it out. Because I'm partying with the aliens, baby.

I'm going to Area 51. Okay, okay. That's good. Just don't. We're going to cut it up in some UFOs. It's the only place where your gas might get shot trying to get to the party. Yeah. Well, you show me them aliens, man.

Yeah, I, you know, that makes sense. I thought Area 51 would get drafted. Yeah, that's a good draft. You've got a lot of space going on. Yeah, that makes sense. Well, that's how I get to the ISS. It's from Area 51. Can they launch from there?

I'm sure. Yeah, but in the alien craft. So it's even faster. The only other real one I didn't take that was on my list was the Roman Coliseo. Oh, yeah, that was a good one. I thought that one would be good, but you took Lambeau Field. Basically the same. I don't have a single leftover.

I had the Mount Everest Base Camp. Sure. Seems like that would be a good time. That's going to limit your guest list as well. Yeah, well. And this is more just, it's picture-picture, but like Stonehenge. Okay. In the background, lots of pictures?

Yeah, I mean, other than that, you're just... It's a grassy... Yeah, you're just in grass hills. Yeah, you're just like... I've got a grass hill pretty near my house. With some rocks, though, man. Not Stonehenge rock. But if we made the rules about the museum that I can just ride the whale,

if I'm having a party of Stonehenge, that means I get to be all of it... You can climb up in those ruins. Come up in those hinges. Yeah, I'm gonna be dual push-ups on the top. It's really done. There are no hinges in Stonehenge, which I feel like is... Well, it's not spelled like that. Yeah, it is, it is hinge.

There are hinged. Isn't henged with fence? Yeah, with H-E-N. You can spell hinged multiple ways. This is crazy, man. Today is crazy. It really hinges on how you spell it. Yeah.

Oh, but, booch. Um, all right, let's, uh, close it down. What did we learn today? I learned that if you just talk to someone doing something wrong, It's probably the easiest way. I learned that I got a, I have some booey traps to take down. Oh my goodness. And I didn't learn anything today.

So that'll do it for today's show. Jason with the scat next week. Can't wait. What? And we'll be back with another episode. Dude, this was our last show ever. Congrats guys. Oh my gosh.

Wow. Well, have a good one then. Have a good life, everyone. Goodbye. Thanks for listening to the Spitballers podcast. To see what other nonsense the guys are up to, check out spitballerspod.com.