Spitballers Comedy Podcast - Spit Hits: A Million Dollar Challenge & The Most Memorable Death Scenes - Comedy Podcast

Episode Date: April 14, 2022

Spit Hit for April 14, 2022: We're back!! On today's episode we talk about a pretty wide gamut of nonsense. From getting hit in the ankle with shopping carts, to being reborn as a domesticated animal. In the situation room, we tread in some dangerous waters when a listener puts us in a real life 'Wife Swap' scenario. We put a nail in this episode's coffin with a draft of the most memorable death scenes. Subscribe and tell your friends about another funny episode of The Spitballers Comedy Podcast! Connect with the Spitballers Comedy Podcast: Become an Official Spitwad: SpitballersPod.com Follow us on Twitter: Twitter.com/SpitballersPod Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/SpitballersPod Subscribe on YouTube: YouTube.com/Spitballers

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just go to skylightframe.com and enter the code ballers. That's S-K-Y-L-I-G-H-T-F-R-A-M-E.com. Use code ballers. We're back with another spit hit on today's episode. We're going to talk about, well, a pretty wide gamut of nonsense. As much nonsense as possible, including things like getting hit in the ankle with a shopping cart. Ow! Being reborn as a domesticated animal. Awkward. And in the Situation Room, we tread into some dangerous waters as well.

Make sure you do not miss a minute. Enjoy the show. What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the Spitballers Podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason. Afraid I'm up, up, this is gonna hurt. Ow! Ow!

Yeah! Did you say, it's gonna hurt? Oh, it's gonna hurt. That's right. I'm so scared. This is a show about pain and freedom, my friends. Welcome to the Spitballers. Oh my gosh. It's gonna hurt.

Yow! It's not bad. I'll take it. My standards have changed after 115 shows. They just keep moving down? Yes. Welcome in. It's an escalator on this show it's got one direction apologies to anybody who is careened off the road during that scat into a canal or something uh welcome into the spitballers podcast andy mike and jason back with you

great show today jason was doing some foreshadowing with his just tremendous scat and uh we have would you rather situation room when people hear why that was a foreshadow and then like backtrack to what the scat actually was i i i'm gonna officially weigh in here i liked it i i it. I was perfectly fine with it. I'm not going to go as far as to say I liked it. Right. Okay. Fair enough.

But I like that people will enjoy it the further they get into the show. I like that. Absolutely. This is deep. I have many layers to my scats. And if I can weigh in. Jason was scatting 13 seconds before we hit record. My scats are like an onion.

Exactly. They stink. They scats are like an onion. Exactly. They stink. They stink. And they have layers. They stink and they have layers. I'm going to give it an A plus. A 100 out of 100. An onion is the right comparison.

They stink and they have layers. I love it. Spitballerspod.com. Click the Become a Spitwad button. Support the show. And you'll get some perks over there on Patreon. You can find us on Twitter at spit ballers, pod,

Instagram.com slash spit ballers pod. And if you wanted to watch that scat in full high definition, that's youtube.com slash spit ballers. Excited to be with everybody. Let's do some. Would you rather, would you rather, everybody. Let's do some Would You Rather. Would You Rather. Full transparency right before the show, Jason realized it was his scat and we were urging Al Borland along. Al, say hello.

What's up, Speedwads? There you go. There it is. And we said, hit record, hit record, start the show, start the show, because we didn't want Jason to be prepared. Yeah. And Al reassured us as he was getting things dialed in. He said, I don't think Jason's going to end up prepared if you give him an extra 30 seconds. To be fair, those 30 seconds are where I- Were they crucial? They were crucial.

It's where I found myself- This is what we told you, Al. Come on, man. As a man and as a musician. And so you can all thank All for the delay in my wonderful skit. All right. First, would you rather question comes from Mr. King on Patreon. Mr. King.

Yeah, he's very important. All right. Yes, he is the king, but he prefers to go by Mr. King. That's Mr. King to you. That's right. I don't know if I could take mr king seriously all right would you like your highness right mr king mr king uh would you rather be fair in defense of mr king he actually his name is adam but we had another adam in in uh wrote in for the situation room so i I used Mr. King.

I took the liberty there. His name's Adam King. You took the liberty? You changed? Wow. Hey, if you got to change a name, Mr. King is a pretty good name. Wait, did you come up with Mr. King all by yourself? No, his name was Adam King, but we had another Adam.

I thought you just changed an Adam to Mr. King as your ultimate. That was the only thing you could think of. It was like, Mr. King seems right. I need a name. Yeah. Any name will do. All right. Would you rather have someone follow you around randomly hitting you in the ankle with a shopping cart?

Oh, no. Or have somebody who randomly comes and screams in your ear through the day. I will say that shopping cart ankle hit is, that's a painful experience. Yes, definitely. It's brutal if you're walking. If you're standing still, someone runs into you with a shopping cart. It's like, whatever. I mean, it's not, I don't want that to happen.

Now, have you, what's worse, Achilles or front shin? If you're on it from no, no way. Achilles is way worse. Oh, we've got a discrepancy. If you're and this is what I was in the middle of saying. If you are walking and you're in the process of having the heel roll up from the ground at the same time that that front bar comes over your heel and you get kind of you know what you know what do they call it like a flat tire you know when you do that to someone give me a break i mean that doesn't

feel good but we're talking about the the bone the metal on bone is worse than metal on i think that andy has never experienced an attack on his achilles because i know he hasn't maybe not it is maybe i keep my achilles safe i don't know you apparently maybe i'm not irresponsible with my achilles a wife or children that have far more respect or fear i don't know what it is but when they're out grocery shopping with you they must not walk too close behind you with a grocery shop with a shopping cart. Because when I'm out, I'm always pushing the cart, bro. We're learning right now that Jason is not pushing the cart.

I'm 50-50. I'm 50-50. I think both my wife and myself prefer to push the cart. This is just a matter of like, do the wives enjoy? Like, I like push the cart. I'm hungry at zero. This is just a matter of like, do the wives enjoy? Like, I like pushing the cart. No, that's not what it's about. That's not what it's about. It is in my home.

It's about the fact that if my wife pushes the cart, she leaves it in the middle of the aisle. Oh, no. She's in the way of people. Oh, no. She's got no cart awareness, honey. I'm sorry, but you don't. Oh, no. You got no cart awareness.

It's full obliviousness with that car. She can pin four or five people in behind it. No, they won't know. They won't know. There's a full traffic jam? She won't notice. She'll walk away from it when they're all stuck back behind it. I'll be right back.

There's some samples over there. I'll be three rows down. I love you, honey. I love you. But seriously, I'm taking that car from you. So the Achilles squish is pretty bad huh it is brutal i i would say you know if you looked up top 10 most painful things that have ever happened to people i think shopping cart achilles has to be i mean a shin uh injury

that's not fun no it's not fun a shin smack is it's that's trouble you know you forget to wear your shin guard at that old soccer game uh you're not gonna be happy but i've been kicked in the shin and it it hurts it hurts like bumping an elbow it hurts like any bone that gets knocked on something hard but when you're actually trying to utilize part of your body that then is both hit and stretched and said, no, man, I tell you one thing I did this week. I tried to get to my bed a little too quickly. Apparently, I don't know how this is possible. This sounds like a classic.

And I smashed my thigh into the corner of the bed frame. And I want to explain something to you when it happened there was no physical sign that damage had happened other than the pain inside me over the course of down did you go down i went i went down hard and my my wife literally kind of gasped and like the pain she go like oh she knew that i was in pain. And over the past week, the bruise, the size of a softball has formed from that damage over time. Like that, that was running into the bed from running into my own bed.

Friend, you guys, this is a serious problem in the more household. When we, what is wrong with you people? I'm telling you, here's what happened. This was about,

this was about two years ago you have all right we have a little rabbit hole here a little a little story time what kind of bed frames jagged bed frames my jagged with the ones with the spikes sticking wild wooden wild wooden bed we we we had you know our we've been married for 15 years we had the same you know bed furniture set that we had always had for 12 13 years and then a couple of years ago that's a pattern you had a long pattern we had an entire pattern of what it's like to walk around our bed and two years ago we replaced our bedroom furniture and we we and we got this bed that has a really nice headboard. And at the base of the bed, at the foot of the bed, there's a little bit of an ornate.

Is this a sleigh? Yeah, kind of. It's not a sleigh bed, but it's kind of like a sleigh bed. If you can imagine that. Ornate footboard. And at the front, it sticks out a little bit like you know i would say four or five inches not much to the side but it's a hard edge it's it's you know it's a 90 degree angle edge of wood um why does it do that but well i mean if you saw it it's very normal

i'll post a picture if you want to see this i'm very intrigued but here's what happened in our house we get this delivered i'm not here i'm at work i get home that afternoon that that evening and my wife tells me and shows me this massive bruise she has on her leg and it wasn't from once and it wasn't from twice it was three times that she ran right into it because she's used to walking around the bed at a certain distance. And that was you. I mean, you walk the same thing a thousand times. You a thousand and one.

All of a sudden, it's different muscle memory. I got you. She massacred her leg. I mean, this bruise was brutal. And I proceeded as you might have. I ripped. I mean, I just I tormented her for the stupidity of three times running into that thing. It was unfathomable that you could constantly do that.

We fast forward a couple hours. We're getting ready for bed. And I have never ran my leg into bed post as hard in my life. ran my leg into a bent post as hard in my life and over the next two weeks guys i'm telling you it was 30 40 times that the both of us we could not walk around this thing we tore our quads apart and here's the craziest part it was never an inch different it wasn't a centimeter different. You're bruising the same spot over and over and over. I felt like it was bleeding at one point. It was crazy how it

just falls off. You just cut it down like a tree. It took at least a week before we... Obviously we'd change. Obviously we'd go okay, I'm not... My leg's a little sore. i want to walk around and so we'd walk around but you can walk around four or five or six times but that seventh

time if you forget if it's late at night you're getting up to go to the restroom you've got your path that you always take it and your leg falls off it was they don't make those bumpers for adults those corner bumpers they make for the kids for furniture. I needed to install those. We need those. We had made them. And nothing in our 15 years of marriage made my wife happier than after getting mocked. After getting mocked for running into it when I did it, she threw a party. She was so happy.

And it hurt like the dickens. Oh, that's spectacular. It hurts, man. I still have fear when I walk near my bed. PTSD. And it hurt like the Dickens. Oh, that's spectacular. Yeah, it hurts, man. I still have fear when I walk near my bed. I'm afraid of PTSD. It's like bed 87. He puts rollerblade pads on before he goes to bed.

Okay, I don't remember the question anymore. Mr. King has such an important one. A shopping cart or somebody that randomly comes and screams in your ear through the day. I don't want to be afraid that much. I don't want to scared the guy screaming in my ear i'll probably punch them that's assault charges i'm gonna go with the shopping cart i guess you and i have to take the shopping cart i have built up a callus or something so i will take the screaming you can look the truth like if you if it keeps being like the front because it's like, oh, wait, no, it's someone follow you. Yeah, that's Achilles. It's definitely an Achilles.

Oh, man. You're going to tear an Achilles one day. You're darn right you will, over and over. Oh, no. I guess you have to take the scream because of long-term ankle injuries. Okay. This, whatever. Rosalyn from the website, would you rather be reborn as a

domesticated pet oh or as an animal in the wild and this has some that's this has some layers to it because it definitely does much like an onion much like a stanky old onion uh or or a scat from jason um i my instinct was like wild animal instantly. Got to be a wild animal. Make me a wild animal. Right, you want to be free. Be free in the ocean. I can go wherever I want.

Be a deer running through the woods, babbling brooks. That'd be fun. But then you're really, you're part of the circle of life at that point. You're part of the food chain. And not at the top. Probably not. And so, you know, as a domesticated pet, I could be living that. Look, I don't like cats, right?

If you listen to the last, an episode a while ago, what did we do? Cat salesman? Who knows when it was? I was allergic to the episode itself. You're a smart man. Yes, go on. Yes, but I wouldn't mind being one because that life seems just fine. Oh, you don't have to care about anybody and you get cared for?

Look, here's the reality. I mean, you actually care. You have anti-care. You don't care about anybody, but they want your love so much. Oh, they'll buy me things like those cat towers look fun. Nah. Please give me the food and the catnip there are certain people that i know that love the outdoors they love hiking and climbing and climbing rock walls

and crazy things and and being an animal with those abilities outdoors could be appealing to me the outdoors and we live in arizona is a nightmare at all times i am hot i am sweaty what i don't want to do is put on a fur coat and then be outside i know that my dogs don't like being outside what if you were like in alaska well then i'm freezing what that was the example you went with well what if it was terrible in a different way you couldn't go like san diego here's the reality i live a good life right now i'm happy he's a sea bird if i was an animal like a chipmunk i mean here's what my dogs do they get fed they play they swim they get rubs and lots of poop far poop. Far more than I. They poop wherever they want.

Oh, you poop where you please. I mean, you know, you get trained that's like, oh, I should poop outside. Okay. But I mean. You have a pretty good choice. So pretty liberal poop choices. Yeah. I think they have a great life.

Literally, the only advantage a wild animal has is that they can run a further distance. Probably from a predator if you could make me a bald eagle i will go with that one because what's killing a bald eagle well yeah domesticated bald eagle is not fun i mean domesticated i'm saying the flip side of being if i'm a bald eagle i'm gonna choose outside no i there's no domesticated bald eagles that's my point is this do we get to pick the animal do we get to there's no domesticated bald eagles that's my point is this do we get to pick the animal do we get to pick whether we're any animal that's that's i think that's what it's a random draw what part of what makes it great is because like you could be you know a deer in the pacific northwest and then that seems pretty solid i'm sure there's

natural predators up there but like humans like human beings pretty great or you could be like a gazelle in the savannah where you're like going down to the waterhole means that our gator might pull me down and so there's pros and cons of like the domestic animal like so jason we have we have had to experience domesticated animal life very recently of being trapped in one place the only time you ever get to go out is because you get to go to the vet and that's it otherwise you're trapped in the home like that's another layer of it and you're are you good with that if i grew up with this if this was the only normal that i knew i'd be fine with this this life is fine i miss what used to be and so yeah no i'm i'm taking the man in the box doesn't know

he's in the box my dog loves his life both i say my dog i have two dogs apparently i love oh well no no no no no no no it was rocky rocky was the one I was talking about. Sugar's too stupid. Don't let him hear this. Sugar can't listen to podcasts. She's dumb as a rock. I love her, but she's so dumb. Rocky is smart. He gets pampered. He gets presents. He gets rubs.

He gets love. He gets fed as much as he wants. And the other dog doesn't? No, they both do, but I just don't think about Sugar. She's too stupid. I'm a lover. she's a sweet sweet sweet dumb dumb dumb dog i mean dumb a dog dumb dumb dumb a dog she's no you know she takes after her father which is me okay okay okay uh if it's a random draw in the wild the likelihood that i'm

eating within six months is high and I don't want to be eating. So I'll go domesticated. Someone loves me on purpose as a domesticated pet. They bought me, they might, you know, take care of me for a long time. They buy me treats.

You get air conditioning. Yeah. So like the random draw though, if you're domestic, if you're a domesticated pet, the random draw is of you being a dog or a cat like the probability goes way up meanwhile if you're a wild animal like the possibilities are endless man i will be an angler fish down in the in the ocean where people don't even see things i wish al could assign us a wild animal at random. Not choose one for us, but let us know what we would be.

Is there a random animal generator anywhere? Can you take care of that for us, Al? I'm sure you have one of those laying around. Here is the downside. You choose domestic. Andy's a crab. You choose the domesticated animal life, and you're a bird.

I got a generator here. this is for our wild animal all right give it all right all right mike first i'm i'm wild i'm wild i'm in i mean you mike are a basilisk oh that's pretty good what is that it looks like a lizard of sorts a basilisk is like devastating when it comes to role-playing games. I was going to say, in Harry Potter, very venomous. Yes, but in real life, you'll be stepped on as a lizard. Nope, not by stone people. But stories will be written about him. What am I?

Because basilisks are so fierce. Andy, you are a kangaroo. Oh, that's a good draw. I'm pretty happy. That's a good draw. You can jump, you can dunk kangaroo. Oh, that's a good draw. I'm pretty happy. That's a good draw. You can jump, you can dunk. Hopping around. I can store things.

I can dunk. Yeah, you can dunk. You can dunk on like a 20-foot hoop. I like it. And Jason, you are an elephant. Oh, yeah. Hold on. I demand a recount.

Yes. You want to know who's my predator? Nobody. I'm just know who's my predator? Nobody. I'm just out there living my life. And I eat what I want, obviously. And this is a little bit of typecasting, but I'm down with it. We've seen the Jungle Book. You have to bow to the elephants for some reason.

I would pre-cut your tusks off and just leave them on the ground, though. Just to stay safe. Just leave them. Hey, that's a real problem. I'm not... You're not wrong. You're not wrong. Okay.

Just out of curiosity, Al, are you an owl, or did you do a random draw yourself? I'll do one more here. Okay. I just want to know what you would be. I got a kitten. All right. Which happens to be a domesticated animal. Yeah, but you're on the streets.

All right. Here we go. Skolger on Patreon has a would you rather question for us. Let's go Vikings. Would you rather never be able to watch professional sports ever again or never be able to watch your kids play sports ever again? what is this question who let this through the process this is an easy question this is an easy question for me um i love my kids i do but my kids have a very short window of their that's how you start every question yes when i love my when you're coming with bad news

i love both my dogs i will watch professional sports i've i've been watching professional sports you know very regularly so good for at least 20 years and i hope to do it for another 50 years versus the you know what is it a 10-year window that your kids are playing sure yeah you know go get them champ and not every kid play sports i don't think i play i played tennis for like a year but that was that was the extent of my it also doesn't say that your kids doesn't say that your kids can't play sports you just can't watch them right oh yeah they're gonna play you're just a bad dad that doesn't show up at the game because you're at the NFL game. You're at the actual.

Now, here's the loophole. You ready for my loophole? I don't think I'm ready for your loophole. I'm going to devastate my youngest, Isaac, because he loves sports. And daddy ain't never showing up to his game. And here's what I'll tell him. I can show up to your game when you make it to professional sports so you need to be better if you want daddy to show up and then that's motivation he needs to

get all the way to the paid ranks that's pretty new house that's pretty strategic you've just yeah how many professional sports stars had dad wounds i am the reason he makes it to be a pro because i never showed up to his games you're welcome isaac i'm pretty impressed man i will say that gosh we're recording this episode in the midst of the pandemic and the number one thing like my wife said that kids had short school seasons and stuff like that. I missed the heck out of watching my eight-year-old play sports. That's what honestly has broken my heart through this whole thing is his season had just started. But I like professional sports a lot too.

And this is an easier question to us because we have an out. We have an excuse. Yeah, it's our job. Our professional job as the Fantasy Footballers podcast. We watch the NFL for a living. And so, yeah, sorry. Do you want a house? Do you want food?

Well, then I can't come to your game. That being said, I want a PSA here. We're all three very loving fathers and don't miss any of our children's games in real life we don't we help that's we help them we coach them and it's both regular and children's sports no i don't think mike answered i'm one i'm gonna make mike answer smart yeah so i've been trying to break it down and like to me, because my daughter's not really into sports, but she does. She loves dance. And I'm assuming that I'm missing dance things now.

My son loves sport. My middle son loves sports. My youngest, we aren't sure yet. We aren't sure which route he's going to take. But if I could, I'm taking, I'm taking my kids sports. Sorry, guys. I'm fully analytics, baby. Let's go.

Just reading box scores. The eye test is the lie test. I'm not watching anymore. Every day we come into the office. Hey, hey, what happened? What happened? What happened in the game? I need a play by play breakdown.

All right, let's jump into the Situation Room. Spitwads, when we started doing this podcast, we were doing absolutely everything. I was in a cloth office. Mike's feet were in front of Andy's face on the shared desk. But eventually we have hired, we have expanded, we have grown. And the most important thing you're going to do for your business is who you hire and if you're hiring you need indeed because indeed is the hiring partner where you can attract interview and hire all in one place they're the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applications to meet your must have requirements or else you don't pay.

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This first situation comes from a supporter on Patreon whose name is Jason Used Me As a Puppet. So there you go. Oh, that's one of my puppets. That's their name. That's theirets. Yeah. That's their name in a real, that's their name, Mike. That's their name in a real life version of wife swap. The three of you must swap families and health households for a month.

How will that go? Who will survive the longest? Who will survive? We'll be able to adapt. Who will get thrown out? Oh man. That is a brutal question. Sure is a situation.

This question is a situation. This situation is real. Let me speak in generalities. I think we fit in our families just about right. In our own families. We fit in our families so perfectly. We really do. I think if you move one to the right, we're all messing up these families.

If you move one to the wrong, we're all messing up these. One to the left, we're all messing up these families. Or abandoning. We really have. You know our personalities on this show. We kind of fit together nicely as like a three-piece yin and yang um what's the third part of that jay yin and uh yong i guess but um i don't know we need a new vowel i'm just i'm just saying like i can

visualize you know a three-piece yin yang and yang i guess no like a like a piece yes oh there you go it's already done one of these things exists it's called a piece symbol um yes okay so we we fit together like that but our families are really reflections uh you know of us as a whole so the yin and the yang and the Yang, I am, I am not organized. My wife is not organized. We are much more, um, you know, you,

we're just, we're, we're a little bit more insane, um, is what I would say. And so like the Holloways are super organized, super efficient and everything's, you know,

it's a, it's a tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight,

tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight,

tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight,

tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight,

tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight,

tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, tight, things you know it's a it's a tight tidy ship i think if we swapped i don't know what i don't

know if the family bursts first or if we do but i think we would right it's like who who adapts who gets thrown out i look uh who survives who survives nobody it's going to be a catastrophe i have no answer for this situation this is man, this is the hardest situation room that's ever been asked. Because while Jason is right, while the three of our personalities can form this triangle, which is just a very strong structure, if you swapped us, it would be a disaster. I will say this. Whoever... I think Jason would survive the longest because you are the most kind of go with the flowy.

Oh, man. Yeah, I can go with the flow. I think I would survive the longest. But Postmates is everywhere. Right. Yes. Thank you. Doesn't matter what family you're in.

You can get Postmates no matter what family you're in. I think whoever comes to my house would, look, at least you'd be extremely well fed. And, you know, I think you'd enjoy yourselves. I do. Look, Jason, you'd be up for a rude awakening because my children do not eat McDonald's. They don't.

That's fine. I eat everything, my man. I mean, like, if you get rid of my top five foods, I've still got like 50 top-ish foods to go to. So I'm okay there. So long as it's not like if there was a problem where it's like I can't have gluten, I'm out. You know what I mean? Like day one, I'm done. Wow.

Anything to add, Mike? No. It's impossible. Yeah. It's impossible. Yeah, it would be. I know both your wives. I very much respect both your wives, but no, it wouldn't. The switch of the three of us would be a catastrophe. I don't know if you guys have ever heard this metaphor,

but it's kind of like changing the footboard of a bed. Right. you guys have ever heard this metaphor but it's kind of like changing like the footboard of a bed you know after 15 years you're gonna smack into that new footboard muscle memory you're gonna mess it all up you will be destroyed you'll be all right we're moving on alex from the website here's his situation for us your tv just died on you a friend steps in with an extra tv that they graciously gift to you you use that tv for a while until you are ready to upgrade can you nail can you now sell the gifted tv okay to offset the cost of your new TV? Great question. Real situation. Been there. You've been there?

I've been there, and I've had the person sell the thing I gave them before, too. Oh, so you've had it both ways. This is interesting. The parents gave you a TV because that's a different deal. The parents give you something. It's because they are saying, we want this out of our house. And through the kindness of our heart, we're just going to give it to you. True, true.

So you have given someone an item and they sold said item? I'm fairly confident Josh has done that a few times. I mean, we all knew who it was. I mean, I'm pretty sure that's happened before. Look, I think the real answer, my real answer for this, and you guys can weigh in, is that because I wanted to say like, okay, if you have it for six months, then it's fair game. But I think it's more of a, you got to have a little sense to it. It's a little bit of, have I used this in a real

way for some period of time? If you give me something here, here's the TV and I don't use it and I just sell it in six months. That's, that's not good. That's not okay. That's not above board. I should be giving you that money. I can sell it. I should give you that money. But if I use it for some period of time, it's fair game to sell. It's mine. I'll say where it is tough, I made the joke about the parents doing it, but I'm imagining me doing it.

I give somebody my television. I'm doing that with a purpose. I'm doing that because now I go to the wife and say, look, these people, they were up against it they needed a tv we have the ability to get a new tv and now we look we we got to do it so almost the person who i have given the television to they have they have basically done me a favor by opening things up that I get to upgrade my television. Yeah, I get that. But, you know, I've been on the other side.

Like, I was thinking about. So I know my answer. My answer, I feel like, is pretty clear. But I also know the feeling. You know, we've given quite a few vehicles to my wife's family over time when, when we're going to replace one because she's got nine siblings. And as they all have grown up, it's like,

you could give a car away a month and you still, still need one. Yeah. We need more months and more cars, but like, that's a big item where it's like a, you know, a kind gesture.

And I will say, had they just turned around and sold that it would have, Oh yeah. I would have been like, turn around and sell it yeah like you got it it's like you sold it it's like wait what we just so that that lends credence to what andy's argument is if like you use it for six months a timeline i'm gonna use a real life situation and i'm gonna put mike on the spot because it actually happened to him oh boom, boom, bam. All right. A long time ago when Mike was buying a new vehicle, he sold his old vehicle.

I did. And he sold it to my brother. I did. And he sold it at a discount, I believe. Oh, no. Is this where I hold on? Oh, he's going to learn something here. Oh, no. This is not good.

This is not good. Did you sell it at a discount and does that matter i sold it to him for because you gave him a deal it wasn't a giveaway but you gave him a deal i gave him a very good deal how many months later would it have been appropriate for him to sell that vehicle mike for a profit tell me he made a profit i'm sure he made a profit i mean and listen my brother didn't turn around and sell it he didn't acquire it to sell it he drove it for some period of time but i'm actually asking how many months because if he drove he might have driven it for honestly i think he

probably had it for about a year is that enough okay yeah a year is enough time uh because because this is okay breaking breaking news i did not know about this okay so i'm breaking this down your your brother is a car guy yeah he's probably bought and sold 50 cars in the last this this car this car definitely needed some uh some fixing that like i can't do i would have had to go to pay to do it your brother knows your he has the skills to do that. So to me, he fixed it. I'm sure. Yeah, he did. I mean, like cosmetic damage, engine damage.

So that actually doesn't bother me because he has used skills that he has developed over the course of a lifetime. And so then I'm okay with it. No hard and fast rule. No hard and fast rule. No hard and fast rule. He had it for a year. He fixed it. Like that's... He made $40,000 on that car.

I would feel really, really bad. You might feel bad. But in this example... He turned around and sold it for 90 grand, Mike. In this example, though, you you sold it you didn't gift it true you know what i mean so he did kind of do a family discount if he turns around because he was andy's brother yeah all right so my view of this is a great i said i had a you know where where i genuinely believe i i this is this is, I'm going to need your brother's address.

He has some make good to dish out here. He gets an invoice from Mike. If I gift something to someone else, they can turn around and do whatever they want with it. That should be the way that your mindset is when you give somebody something.

If I had given a vehicle... I'm not saying it doesn't feel bad. But it's still going to feel really bad. If you gift some, if I had gifted one of those vehicles and they turned around and sold it, I would have been upset, but I would have recognized that's their right to do. Otherwise, what I'm saying is in the future that would be the well right yeah absolutely later on that could affect that but if I'm the receiver if I were to get that gift because that's the way the question is asked right my tv goes out I get this tv I use it a little while later I have the ability to upgrade my tv what do i do with that tv i probably i'm just being completely

honest here i probably wouldn't even think about asking the original if they want it back i just i would just that's my tv i'd probably just sell it and get a new one and now with this question being asked maybe i would be wiser. I hope we've changed some lives here. Yeah, I think we have. I mean, you've got to think these situations through. We've changed my life with this question. I know someone who owes me $30,000.

Right. I mean, the real question is when you received the gift, did you or did you not say no takesies, backsies? That's the real issue. That's the legal precedent. The contract clause, yes. If I said no takesies, backsies. And that holds up in 48 of the states. That's right.

The continental US is good. I submit my evidence. No takesies, backsies. I find in favor of the plaintiff. All right. Adam from Patreon. This is the Adam that forced the other Adam to be named Mr. King. Oh, man.

This guy's no king. But thank you for your support on Patreon. Yes. Adam Clown. Yes, the jester. A man approaches you three and offers $1 million. Oh, okay. And a Tesla Roadster.

Don't end it there. To the person who can keep their hands on the car the longest. You must stay standing. You must not speak a word. Who wins and how long do they last? This was... Oh, my goodness. The YouTuber Mr. Beast does a lot of stuff like this where it's

put your hand on the box of money or whatever last man standing wins i have always wondered this because there are like survivor challenges too where they're how long can you last on the top of a pole or you know in the elements i know i don't know i know two-thirds of this answer um confidently which is um it's going to be a two-man race it will be 100 between andy and mike because it says you must stay standing i'm out like there's no chance one million dollars at tesla roadster when we get to our eight when we get to our eight i mean i i know there's no way that i am going to be willing to just stay standing as long as you two let's say we all want something the same it's it's exactly what i don't know if you are into a roadster or if you like a million dollars. You know, maybe you don't.

But if we all want the thing the same and we're all going after it the same, if standing is part of it, I will lose compared to you two. Now, if it was, if it was just a matter of will and not physical body, I will win. But not if standing is involved. I feel like I have a very competitive will. Look, this is not just standing. You got to start thinking long term.

You got to start thinking about hunger. You got to start thinking about pooing and peeing. Oh, go right in my pants. You would be the leader in that clubhouse. Yeah. Now, let me ask you this. Maybe that's my out. Let's say I poop my pants right there.

Maybe we leave. Maybe we leave because of it. Maybe that's my out. Let's say I poop my pants right there. Maybe we leave. Maybe we leave because of it. Jokes on you. I can't smell anything anyways. That's true. Jokes on you, man, who pooped in his own pants. You can smell it. I can't.

I think it would be very competitive if you were in this situation. And we're all, I mean, we talk about Tesla all the time. Mike's had his eyeballs on that Roadster. If somebody offered him a chance to win a Roadster, not pay for it, and then a million dollars on the side, which you probably need for the taxes on the Roadster, that would be, I wonder how long. Let me ask Al, let me put Al on the spot,

since he put us on the spot with the switching wife swap family question. Oh, goody. Al, who wins? And you don't get to say. You have to pick somebody. Who actually wins that battle of will? You know all three of us. You've known us for a while.

Who do you think wins? Man, it is that two-man race, and I i gotta go with mike man he's stubborn as a mule i i think i would go mike as well because i think once it got down to the when both of you are wanting out but both of you are wanting it and i know how much mike has wanted a roadster and andy knows how much mike has wanted a roadster at some point when you're near the very end i think andy could in his mind justify the grace of the incredible gift that he is now and i would accept it to allow him to take his hand off and say i'm i'm not doing this because i'm tired for me this is for you mike remember this and the other part of this is not only do you have to stay standing,

but you can't speak a word. And I feel like that's living Mike's best life right there. Mike would love to never speak. I was going to say a word to say, Mike, I'll let you win the Roadster. Split the million with me, and I'm good. I'm out. I have seen the, you know, how long can you stay in the, you know, the hot tub full of ramen?

You know, I've seen like one of the Mr. Beast videos of that. If that was the contest, ain't nobody ever beaten me. I mean, if I'm, if we're in an air conditioned controlled environment where we're sitting, sorry, fellas, I can stay here forever. How long until that tub is just you in a tub? There's no ramen. I mean, ramen is delicious. Chlorine ramen.

Oh, my gosh. Chlorine ramen. And after 48 hours, it ain't just chlorine in that ramen. Fair point. How long do you think we could last? How many hours? In a hot tub? No, no, no.

In the car situation. The car situation. I think we could go like what how many hours no no no the car situation i think we could last situation i think we could go the full full 24 i could go 24 hours you wouldn't be able to go 24 because you'd start falling asleep no i could go 24 stay awake 24 hours my issue is i wouldn't want to i would probably be like trying to hand signal you to like make a deal with me i think it like our you 500 me 500 you roadster i think it quit after a second jason's gone i'm bartering 50 50 with you oh now here's an interesting thing here's the way this should be done now okay because i was just thinking okay you you know you have to have your hand on the steering wheel of the roadster uh but you got to be standing outside or whatever well obviously all three of us

can't do that it's probably too difficult to reach the roadster okay but now let's say we did it one at a time and we have no idea how long the others last that's the way these videos should be being done because now i'm going against myself and my own mind of what they can do the best about that would be the person that ends up staying there for an extra 10 hours longer than they needed to yeah i mean because everybody quit and you didn't really quit i wonder if that would make people stay longer or shorter. That's a blind challenge. Yeah. That'd be amazing. Let's do one of these videos. I'll be in to do it. Let's get a mil.

Our YouTube is not big enough for us. Al, totally unrelated, but what kind of car do you have? A Honda Element. Oh, how long would you stand for a Honda Element? Thank you, Al, for volunteering. That's golden YouTube content. How long do you stand for a Honda Element? Thank you, Owl, for volunteering. That's golden YouTube content. How long do you stand for? Nobody shows up to the competition.

I think the spitwads can pool together and have a million-dollar prize pool. Come on, spitwads. Let's do this. We'll be in a bowl full of ramen. All right, let's draft. this we'll be in a bowl full of ramen all right let's draft all right spit wads your bedroom it deserves a refresh now is the perfect time to elevate the most important room in your home with thuma thuma this is a bed company that it it focuses on less is more design clean lines lines, subtle curves. You got to check them out because you're going to love it. Lifestyle enhancing details built into every single bed.

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to receive a $25 credit towards your purchase of The Bed, plus free shipping in the continental U.S. That's Thuma.co slash Ballers. And enter Ballers at checkout for a $25 credit. Thuma dot C-O slash ballers and enter the code ballers. The Spitballers Draft. All right, we are drafting the most memorable death scenes from TV and movies. I knew that this was our draft before we began, just barely before. I did not know it said TV until just now, which does change one of my answers.

Interesting. Okay. now which does change one of my answers interesting okay so i'm actually very excited to have the second pick because i know what jason's number one pick is because he knows it would be my pick at number two so jason kicks it off the most memorable death scenes from tv and movies now memorable can mean a few things yes it certainly can and uh ladies and gentlemen, which I will speak directly to my children right here, spoilers, I would turn this off if you're worried at all about spoilers because I know that there's one in particular for my kids that they don't know about

and that's all I will say. So my children, turn the podcast off. Also, some of these movies you don't get to watch for a while yeah well those don't matter but movies that they're gonna watch sure okay so jason you are numero uno all right well look i i like a draft where i get the first spot and there's a clear 101 um and and that being said because it's tv a movie i think there's maybe a clear 102 here as well so andy i'm sure you're happy but uh my scat talked about freedom

talked about the pain that was coming i forgot about the scat it's gonna hurt freedom william wallace yeah i mean the whole movie leads up to the iconic, inspirational martyrdom of William Wallace. That's my favorite movie of all time, Braveheart. So I will take that as the 101 death in movies and TVs. Okay. So you've got William Wallace in Braveheart, which is a very memorable moving death scene from your favorite movie. All right, now the TV thing brought one into the equation,

and I'm afraid that if I let it go, Mike's going to take it. Maybe. I think I have no idea what you're talking about. Oh, now you're saying that, and it makes me want to let it slip through. Or is he saying it to... Okay. Most memorable death scene in movies or TV.

Oh, my goodness. At the 102, he is really struggling. It's because of the TV brought in the one into my mind, but I'm going to let it go through, I think. All right. All right. I'm going to lead it off with this because memorable, iconic, probably could save it to the end, but I'm going to actually give it its due in the first round,

which is Al Pacino in Scarface. Okay. At the end of that movie is one of the most ridiculous scenes ever. If you remember, Al Pacino is standing on a balcony being pumped full of lead after coming out. So I'm going to go with that movie scene. I've never seen Scarface. Have you both seen Scarface?. I've never seen Scarface. Have you both seen Scarface? Yes, I have seen Scarface.

It's been a while now, but that scene is memorable. And Al Borland wants the world to know he's seen it. Al Borland has seen Scarface? And he's only seen four movies. He's seen four movies, and that's wonderful. I'm shocked right now. And the other three were Land Before Times. So he's seen three Land Before Times and he's seen Scarface.

Take it easy with the draft, man. He's giving you ideas. It's not on my list, but I know what you're doing. We all remember it. Yes, we do. All right. Sadly. Okay.

So now I have my own dilemma because there are two which I think Andy was referring to. Oh, no. Now, the question is do I just take them both because honestly. I'm so dumb. I don't think I've ever been shocked more than both of these. Look, it's happening. It's happening. Oh, no, no, no, no.

It's happening. So I'm going to open it up with my first pick. Oh, okay. Spoiler alert. If you ever watch Game, no, no. It's happening. So I'm going to open it up with my first pick. Oh, okay. Spoiler alert. If you ever watch Game of Thrones. This is a spoiler. Yeah. So I let it go and you're taking it.

Yeah, because of course it was on my list, you dummy. I'm so stupid. All right. Because I'm taking them both. Oh, no. No. First, we'll go in chronological order. Like I said, Game of Thrones.

If you're worried about spoilers and you want to watch it turn the podcast off number one ned stark ned stark that's the one that's the one i let go the first season was one of the most shocking things i've ever seen i knew nothing about game of thrones except uh and uh i jumped in right before season two i knew nothing about it except for there's like it's medieval. There's some magic. And so I bought the first season. Who's on the cover?

Ned Stark. Eddard Stark. He's the leader. And we get to the end of the first season. The scene is happening. And I'm like, oh, man, who's going to rescue Mr. Stark here? And nobody does. And you go, what television show am I watching right now?

It was the first show that I think, like. It's a sit up in your seat. And that's. Yes. It was the first TV show where. Well, I'm dumb because you picked it immediately. And that's the one I thought would make it back to me. When I said there was a 102, that was the 102.

Yeah. Okay. So maybe this is not the 103 for you guys, but I got to follow my heart here of shocking. I know. I know. The Red Wedding. That's where I will go with it. Oh, Jason has a different one.

But for me, I'm selecting Jon Snow's death in Game of Thrones. Oh, my goodness. of thrones oh my goodness what oh my goodness what is happening that's not nearly we're just drafting game of thrones we're about to because am i on the clock this draft is gonna suck if it's just all game oh my goodness now i feel like i'm chasing game of thrones oh yeah okay well anyway so like i'm chasing game of thrones oh yeah okay well anyway so just to elaborate a little bit more the red wedding i have never been more shocked by a scene in television than i was by ned stark except then it was when it was followed up later

in the series by the red wedding i did not see it coming i did not see everything that was going to be involved in that scene and i literally gasped when it all started to take place. Jon Snow's was like, whatever. Yeah. So who's on the clock now? I'm not going to make you stick to that pick, Andy. You can change if you want. Okay.

I will change then. Yeah. I will go with the Armageddon scene. Harry from Armageddon bruce willis all right there we go now we're back on when he is talking to his daughter it's not the game of thrones podcast no it's not no it's not all my picks were movies too and then i was like i should have just gone with eddard so i know bruce willis the end of armageddon very famous melodramatic but fun death scene it's fantastic fantastic. You have the whole buildup to it

where Ben Affleck thinks he's going to be the one. Yes. And then Bruce Willis just dismantles his breathing apparatus, shoves him back in. Saves his life, yeah. For his daughter. Oh, man. It's an incredible scene.

It is. It's memorable. Very, very memorable. All right. And much, much better for the draft. Yeah. Very, very memorable. All right. And much, much better for the draft. All right, Jason. All right. Here's the thing.

When you said you were taking two Game of Thrones, I was worried because I wanted the second best death at Game of Thrones. Then Andy went in with another Game of Thrones, which wasn't even the second best. We could have done a Game of Thrones death. What I've learned today is that 100% Game of Thrones has all the best deaths because Game of Thrones changed the rules of television and it's everybody's fair game everybody can die at any time and it was awesome because it made the intensity of every episode and scene you know you watch tv and it's like oh this person's in a really bad situation like that's what I'm not gonna die who's gonna come who's gonna come save him i fully expect it

to happen and then by the way by the way before you pick your pick jason sean um sean sean bean has now come out and said he is rejecting roles that include him dying no that's all he's good at roles that include him dying. No! That's all he's good at! Because that's all he's ever done in movies. So, go on, Jason. Look, when you're really good at something, why... I am not going... I'm not playing

basketball anymore. I'm too good at it. It's so weird, though, because he didn't get to enjoy the next six, seven years of Game of Thrones publicity and fun because he was dead. Yeah, that's... It's probably that one... That bitterness that that one that bitterness that one bitterness i mean he's like this show's never gonna work fine i'll take this role i'll take the early out all right go ahead so i am not going to draft this because this is not going to

turn into a game of thrones draft yes thankfully but i am going to say what i wanted to draft prior to to already Game of Thrones, which is the second best death in Game of Thrones. The shocking, literal eye-opening death of Prince Omer. Oh, my goodness. Go ahead, Jay. Yeah, that would be the one that I would take. Okay.

All right. But, you know, look, if a lot of people out there haven't watched it, and, you know but you know look if if there's a lot of people out there haven't launched it and you know so i'm gonna go with more i mean this is talking about the most memorable that's the most iconic like what are the biggest um most memorable ones so i'm gonna go old school here i'm gonna go andy holloway and take a classic of all classics i'm pretty sure this was the first movie ever made. I like how I'm taking the bath here while Jason's making the pick. Well, yeah, it's kind of, you know, we got to stick to our brand. This is like the third time somebody's gone Andy Holloway when Andy hasn't.

But this is like when I think about iconic, most memorable, like it just came to mind right away because it's mocked. It's made fun of. It's classic. Oh, I know what it is. It's the Wicked Witch of the West. Oh, no. The Wicked Witch of the West

has this whole death scene which is, I'm melting! No, no, no, no. That's great. Oh, my goodness. Jason, I thought you were going Citizen Kane. Oh, get out of here

with that garbage movie. That movie sucks. That movie is the freaking worst and it's the number one movie of all time. You want to talk about overrated things, it's Citizen Kane. Oh, get out of here with that garbage movie. That movie sucks. That movie is the freaking worst. And it's the number one movie of all time. You want to talk about overrated things, it's Citizen Kane. Was it an incredible feat that like three people put this together? Absolutely. Does that make the movie

hold up over time? No. It's a piece of trash. Alright, I'm in. Okay, I'm in. So Wicked Witch, iconic, the toes curl up, right? The toes curl up. The toes is the Wicked Witch, iconic. The toes curl up, right? The toes curl up. No, the toes is the Wicked Witch of the East. Thank you, Mike. The Wicked Witch of the West is the one that melts when she gets water.

Thank you for the delineation. If you have Wizard of Oz questions, please direct them towards me. All right. Now, since I went old, I'm going to go something new. Something old, something new. I'm going to take the span of time, and it will all be mine. And this one even goes towards the future. I'm going.

And again, I know Mike has already said this, but this is a heavy spoiler of a somewhat recent movie. Oh. So I'll give you three seconds, two seconds, one second. It is Avengers Endgame when Iron Man. It's not even on my list. It's because it's too recent. It's so recent that you don't think about it. That's so good.

At the end of the entirety of this incredible saga of 30 movies, you have the guy that started the whole thing with iron man one the leader of the avengers the sacrifice the finality of iron man tony stark he is gone mike is unhappy uh so yes i will take william wallace the wicked witch and iron man avengers end game as my third pick. And Mike's not recovered. I have Al Pacino, Scarface, Bruce Willis, and Armageddon, and I'm actually coming back with... Mike, you okay? That's poll winning.

We can stop the draft as far as the poll goes, but let's have the rest of the show. Just for posterity's sake. Yes. A memorable scene can be how important it is it can also be the manner in which it takes place based on the uh generation the movie is in i'm actually going to go with hold on hold on what's the movie raiders of the lost ark i knew it when you described it like that i knew it and i'm'm taking the Nazi whose face melted off.

It's fascinating to me. In Raiders of the Lost Ark, because that is just in your brain forever. It absolutely is. On my list was actually the other one, because I think that the... I'm sorry. I'm stealing your limelight here, because I thought about this a lot before the draft. The Raiders of the Lost Ark. Raiders versus Last Crusade. Sure. of Raiders vs. Last Crusade.

And it's like, Last Crusade, man. It's the wrong cup. The guy comes in and he's like, he chose poorly. But Raiders is definitely way up there. Raiders is definitely there. Yeah, when he started talking about sometimes it's important, sometimes it's just memorable.

I literally wrote down melting guy because I added it to my list. Because, I mean, there's not many more drawbacks. If you just think about drawbacks or let's just say gifts online of these moments, that one's up there. And you have to imagine when it was made, filmed, that was like, some people worked pretty hard on that. Oh yeah, on that claymation. To send that moment to your screen.

I've watched special behind the scenes stuff on it. It was really, really intense. Alright, so I feel good about that pick. Yeah, I like it. Alright, now this is the one that I was referring to at the beginning of the draft. My children, please stop listening to the podcast immediately.

I had not read the books, so I didn't know what was about to happen. I have followed along because in these movies, I just watched the movies. They were coming out like one a year, one every other year. Oh, this is a good pick. I don't know it. It's a better pick if you could pick the book. Yeah, well, that's fine. Maybe.

Maybe. Did you guys know that Dumbledore freaking dies in the movies? Oh, gosh. Holy crap. How was he not on my list? This is my Iron Man. He wasn't on my list. Of course. this is my Iron Man he wasn't on my list I had

0.0 inclination that this was about to happen in the movies and that moment was like what have they done what did Steve just do which means that all three of your picks so far

where you said most memorable they all fit the bill as being the identical memorable for you, which is shocking. Sit up from your seat. Yeah. Let me tell a little story. Please do. I love Harry Potter. I've read it a few times, but I started reading it when there were only three books out.

So I got to participate in the book releases when you'd go and line up what movie was it or book whatever books sure so the prisoner of ask so much better yes they are but i totally get it the moment in the books like every person that read that in that book it was like me when i saw the movie bawling just instant bawling the Prisoner of Azkaban was out when I started reading it, and then I stood in line. That was part of the experience, right? Like the midnight 500-person line to get the next book. I love that, man.

I love the midnight release. And so there's these huge lines that go. It was really cool. I was happy to be a part of it. It was pretty much the only thing i was really a part of like that as far as the books he's ever read yeah i mean that's it um and so when the when that book came out and there was this super long line uh of of people waiting there was this youtube video of uh a minivan that would go to these lines.

And I don't know how they, I don't know if they got there early. And they would literally yell out the window, Dumbledore dies. And then they'd peel out with all the smoke in their minivan like that Southwest commercial. And they just kept doing that. Now, hopefully, in fairness, if somebody somebody did that I would not. I would assume it's a joke, but at least, but then it sucks because it's in your mind the whole time. That's a great pick, Mike.

I'm sad it wasn't on my list. I've got really terrible news for you. Oh no. I've got really terrible news. News that will break your heart. No! Oh no, I know what's coming. No! My 11 year old is sitting in on the show.

What about the warnings? Need I say more? Where's the fathering? Come on. Come on. You're telling me I just did that? I can't. No, that has to be on Andy at this point.

I choose not to believe this. I was told you guys were big fans. I got a text on my screen from him across the room with the word, No! I take no responsibility for what has happened. I was under the impression that you guys were like massive fans. You've been to Harry Potter Land. I'll be honest. The reason I didn't bring it up is I thought that he had seen all the movies.

Have you not seen all the movies? Oh, this. I apologize. he has not seen them all we ruined his life well there you go wow all right mike you get to pick one more there's still a how about the death of my son's innocence can be your fourth pick i will say this there's still some there is still you know you're listening there is still incredible excitement. Oh yeah, don't spoil anything else about it then. Yes. I feel so terrible right now. Okay, well moving on

with the draft. What's your next horrific pick, Mike? Alright. What books are you going to be reading soon, son? Have you read Where the Red Fern Gr the red he already read that one we can go with that if you need it oh that oh that's actually not a bad pick that thing destroyed me uh no i'm i'm down to two picks uh one they're they're both both very memorable

one of them is more devastating i'm gonna go with it i'm pretty sure that you guys don't know this one but it's i gotta pay homage to the person we were we were tweeted this idea and they said immediately someone said immediately the 101 is this pick because look futurama the episode with seymour the dog is i I told you, you guys don't know this. So your hearts are not breaking into a thousand pieces like they would if you knew this episode. It is absolutely one of the top three saddest things on television if you are invested in the series. So I'm taking this pick. I knew it would be safe until my last pick but futurama when fry's dog

passes away it's it's the i have to stop talking about it or i'm going to see it i can see it in your face you're it is having trouble reliving this well you you mentioning that as that special no i've never seen almost any of that show, so I have no connection there. And it shocks me that a show called Futurama could have a moment like that. So that is interesting to me. Yes.

That's like saying that scene from Simpsons. And I'm like, what scene from Simpsons? That a cartoon, that's like a funny cartoon, they sneak in and then they punch you right in the heart over a thousand times. I then, that defines my final pick which will be very similar to yours in the fact that if you didn't experience the series you will not enjoy it you will not relate to it this is the only death scene you talk about the shock of the red wedding ned stark right those are big moments i remember watching this show um spoiler alert for those

currently going through the series dexter i was watching dexter season three and uh i'm laying on the couch watching this show and when the surprise death of dexter's girlfriend rita happens in season three i went from a horizontal position to a gaping mouth sitting up bawling my eyes out shock shocking death scene so if you've seen dexter i've seen you understand it's a very wild it was as insane as any of these oh man so i got the last pick and i'm surprised we've all gone we've all gone sad. I came in a little unprepared right before the show and I have a list of like, I'm trying to decide between these great options. So I'll start with one.

I have such a list too. Man, there's so many good ones. one so uh one of them that i'm not taking uh was hitler from inglorious b when they redo the timeline and just destroy him which if you haven't seen is great but andy got the melting guy we don't need to i really like it the movie because we know that kids go to glorious b yeah um i'm going to i'm not going to take this because we had this in our saddest draft but I think it was in the saddest draft was this Macaulay Culkin and my girl? I believe that was taken. With the bees

that was sad. Jason you have a theme going keep the bees coming so I'm down to three and this is interesting because I thought Mike when you said you saw this on twitter and it was the one-on-one you were going to take this i'm not going to take this but it's totally on your brand hans gruber falling from the the building top 100 i was down between i was down between

futurama and hans gruber yes so now i am down to two and And I'm going cartoon or... Oh, I thought he picked that. I feel like Jason is trying to claim... I thought he picked that one. No, no, no. I'm saying... I'm telling a story leading where I'm going. All right. All right.

I think this is too old. I've already got The Wicked Witch. So my last not taking... I am not taking Bambi's Mother. That is a classic. But you are trying to get some partial credit by mentioning these. Yes. No, I mean, we always say the things at the end of the show.

We don't walk through five options. But I am going to land with, and this is weird because it wasn't necessarily the death scene that was memorable, but this is one of the biggest moments. Which would make it a bad pick. Well, this was one of the most memorable deaths in all of cinema when it came out it changed the way movies had hooks at the end but bruce willis oh in the sixth sense oh but but his is his death scene is not even in the movie well no it's trying to claim the whole movie he's trying to claim the whole movie six He's trying to claim the whole movie, Sixth Sense. I mean, basically, I am because the death scene is in the beginning, but you don't find

out until the end. And it's that hook of like, oh, my gosh, he's dead. Can I ask, Al? Al, have you seen Sixth Sense? I have. Does that count as a death scene? The movie, Sixth Sense? I mean, I'll allow it, but I wouldn't draft it.

Oh, it's great. It's a great pick. Good job, Jason. So are we finally down to your pick now, Jason? Yes, that's my pick. We're done. Oh, you're taking it? The draft is over.

Yes, that's what I took. That is what I took. All right. I think the shocking omission is the Titanic scene. That was not mentioned by any of us. Yes, Jack is on my list. Because it's stupid. There was plenty of room.

Climb aboard. You could both live. I almost had Sean Bean from Fellowship. When a death scene happens with a character that's got a mixed... He was Boromir in that movie, and he gives himself up at the end so that everybody survives.

And he dies in every movie. Self-sacrifice. On my list, I had T2. Terminator 2. Is that that the the thumbs up like that's and then uh and then like the shocking ones i have you know uh uh not as a big of a movie but sam jackson in deep blue sea that's like it's out of it's absolutely out of nowhere uh on that same vein the bus the bus girl. I don't even know her name from Final Destination. If you saw Final Destination in the theaters, you know exactly what I'm talking about.

And then the last one, the departed. Spoiler from the departed. But Leonardo DiCaprio at the very end of the movie, man. You do not see that coming. We drafted a spoiler draft. That's what we did. Yes. Top spoilers. movie man you do not see that coming we drafted a spoiler draft that's what we did yes well the best of the best lives in movies and tv you know who made it through the movie

psycho's a good one for sure and then like the hans gruber death uh by the way he hasn't what's alan rickman right yes that's hans gruber he has a death a great death in robin hood that i was remembering oh as the sheriff uh as the sheriff of nottingham and so that one was in consideration we had the jurassic park lawyer that popped into my head the dinosaur eating him that one was on my list yeah so there there are quite oh but but like the hans gruber one is the batman the the batman original with michael keaton do you remember when joker gets thrown off the top of the building yeah and then you've got that laughter at the bottom yeah all right let's figure out what else we learned today

what did we learn today oh Oh, I know what I learned today. I learned I will be forever apologizing to Andy's son. Because I'm a terrible person. The best part is he took, apparently he took his headphones off for this section and he put them back on because he thought we were done talking. Oh, how funny. I learned that our wives are perfect for us and we and we we should stay how we are and i learned that uh i i would be a kangaroo in the wild i'm just fine with it i'm feeling pretty good so i'm pretty envious yeah that is it for this spitballers podcast thank you for tuning in supporting subscribing, and adoring the show.

We appreciate you. And we'll be back next week. Indeed. We'll see you next time. Stay safe. Goodbye. Thanks for listening to the Spitballers podcast.

To see what other nonsense the guys are up to, check out spitballerspod.com.