Spitballers Comedy Podcast - Spit Hits: Don’t Do Murder & Our Biggest Fears - Comedy Podcast

Episode Date: August 18, 2022

Spit Hit for August 18, 2022: Kids: Don’t do murder! We don’t even have a ‘Life Advice’ segment on the show today, but here we are, handing out some solid bonus counsel. We also talk about killer clowns, seedless watermelons, and Jason’s first kiss. We button up the show with a draft of our scariest fears & phobias! Don’t miss it! Subscribe and tell your friends about another hilarious episode of The Spitballers Comedy Podcast!  Connect with the Spitballers Comedy Podcast: Become an Official Spitwad: SpitballersPod.com Follow us on Twitter: Twitter.com/SpitballersPod Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/SpitballersPod Subscribe on YouTube: YouTube.com/Spitballers

Spit Wads, we have one of our most important episodes for today's Spit Hits because the biggest PSA we've ever given is on this episode. We're talking about not doing murder, and I think that's really important for all listeners, all people, to really know. And the kids out there, don't do murder. We're going to dive deep on don't doing murder on today's show. So you're going to want to hear that. And we've got a great draft with our biggest fears.

Check it out. What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the Spitballers Podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason. It's the Spitballers Podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason. My spiders, they're everywhere.

You just... No, no, no, I'm cool with it. Andy's cool with it. Andy is cool. It's fine. Uh, we, we often will try and work in, it's not creative, a little foreshadowing into of the draft today's draft into the scat. And he's just like scats done by the way. Spiders. Yeah, that's true. Now I'm not cool with it anymore. Welcome into the Spitballers podcast. Mike Wright, Jason Moore, Andy Holloway. Episode 121. We do have a scary draft for you.

You cut that off a little. I let you have some room. Thank you. We got Would You Rather, The Situation Room. Al Borland is here. Al, how are you doing today? Doing great. What's up, Spitwads?

I have a little bit of a... What is a fear of owls? I'm sure we could find it. Can we figure that one out? Yeah. Yeah. It has to exist. I've got a little bit of a fear of owl.

Of owl or owls? Strigaphorbophobia. Whoa. There you go. Strigophobia whoa formophobia i'm afraid of trying to pronounce that word that's terrifying at spitballers pod have i ever told you my owl story this is real we have an owl you have a real owl story it's uh i mean it's just short and sweet okay uh but i was this I was a younger fella. So this happened in the past. Yes. Got it. Yes.

And I'm at home. My backyard wall. And then it's street. So you could see streetlights just right outside my backyard. And so it's dark. The lights are on. And I look up, and all I can see is a shadowy figure on top of the light pole. And, I mean, we're in Arizona.

We're in suburban parts of Arizona. And it's a steel light post. And I'm looking up going, how did a cat get on top of this light post? Because I had never even entertained the thought that I would see a wild owl in Arizona where we live. And so I just keep checking on this cat because it's not moving. I'm like, oh, man, this cat is stuck. This cat is stuck on a light post. It's very high up it was metal i don't

know how it climbed up in the first place and then eventually the cat flew away now that's a cat it was and the wings were gigantic and it was holy crap that was an owl you know when you started the story and you said you know know, I was in my backyard and there's a fence, I was thinking to myself, like, there might be people around the country, around the globe that, you know, they see owls. I'm sure people see owls all the time.

They have nature and trees. We're in the desert. Right. I've never seen an owl in the wild in my life. That's why it was so confusing to me. Because owls don't live around here. At least I thought. So it turns out it was a flying cat, though?

Yep. Huge wingspan. Okay. All right. Let's kick this thing off. Would you rather? Noah from the website has a would you rather question for us. He said, would you rather your kids grow up to be way smarter than you?

Impossible. Or way better looking and physically, athletically superior to you? Okay. Interesting. I think I know what happens when you get older i don't think we have to be passed by our kids like generally you imagine your kids grow up they become smarter than you you become dumber yep i believe it is a choice and that 100 of people end up choosing to be dumber okay because the older you get it's not that you're not capable

of learning. It's that you no longer want to. That's fair. I find myself, like when we're all tech heads, right? Or at least fluent, right? We're not like our parents' generation or grandparents that we had to go to their house to teach them how to use the VCR and things like that. I always thought when I grew up, I would then be at the same level as my kids because I'll be just as interested in tech. Right. 100%. I now have an almost 12-year-old. I got no interest in learning new stuff anymore. He knows more than me already,

and I'm done learning. Yeah. Sorry, Jay, but maybe you're done learning because you know, you have someone who just will do it. That is also a factor. Yes. That helps. That helps a lot. Yeah. Really?

You're, you're speaking truth here because it's exactly right. It's not that we can't learn. We don't give a crap. I don't, I don't care. You're, you know, like I don't have the same interest. I don't have to go to school anymore. Like I can totally get that where my learning of tech is, it kind of fell off.

I mean, we can keep up. I can hang. But, I mean, I was back when I was younger. I'm teaching myself computers on a Windows machine. Somehow I had to learn how to reroute memory so that I could run a DOS game. Yeah. And look, there's kids out there listening to that statement saying, I have no idea what that means.

But this was something that I just figured out how to do it by looking things up on the internet. And now I don't want to look those things up anymore however i want like my thirst for history is now off of off of the charts really oh man history is like the most fascinating thing actually going to a place where a historical event occurred my parents they would drag us every summer we would get dragged somewhere and like there was one trip we went up and down the entire east coast this is where i told the story about how my dad yeah i got a little lost he missed pennsylvania yeah the entire state but we went up and down looking at it it was a, you know, seeing America. That's where kind of the birthplace of the nation. Like we went down to Williamsburg and stuff.

Yeah. And I didn't give, I didn't give two craps about what we were doing. And now I'm thinking, man, you could go, you could go to Gettysburg. And this is where, this is where that, that, that battle happened. Yeah. It actually took place here. Based on your mannerisms, I believe you, that you're really into this. You are hyped over Gettysburg.

Oh, man. I know the answer to this. As a parent, one of these validates me as a parent. If my kid does not grow up to be smarter than me, I feel like I failed. If he doesn't grow up to be physically, athletically superior than me, whatever. That's how I feel. So I would rather them grow up and be smarter. Also, I want them to be smarter because I need to be just one inch taller than my boys.

Yeah. Just one. Yeah, but that's because you're tall. That's right. I got one inch too short. I was close to getting to six foot, but I didn't make it. I want that for my kids. Six foot club. Exactly.

I want them to outgrow me. It's a great club. I want it in the club, but I'm never going to get there. Hey, Mike, how do you like that top shelf? Oh, it's so easy to reach. There's a lot of cool stuff up there, Jay. There's cool step ladders, though. I got one that folds up real small and is light.

You guys probably don't need those. Do you use that for, like, in your mirror, though, so you feel better about yourself? So you can reach the sink? I actually just move all my mirrors down a lot. So when you come over, you can't even see yourself. Right, right. No, that's nice. Yeah, I'm going to Louis Armstrong this thing.

I'm going to hear babies cry. I'll watch them grow them grow okay they'll learn much more than i'll ever know taking the intelligence route to be smarter because i already know they're gonna be better looking like that's that's done now i get both yeah fair enough robbie from patreon would you rather be the only genius in a world full of idiots or the only idiot in a world full of geniuses i mean that's brutal okay ignorance is bliss right that's that's what they say at first i was like this is the this is maybe the easiest slash dumbest question we've ever got because okay why would you want to be the only dumb person? Do you want to be dumb or smart? That's what the question is saying.

But if you really think through this, if you're smart and the whole world are idiots, there's no Tesla to drive. There's no cool new EV cars. That's true. There's no cool new technology coming. Everybody's stupid. The world around you is screeching to a halt or never even got to the cool. We're talking all this tech stuff. Now everything's stupid. No innovation because everyone around you is an idiot.

The whole world is dumb. I'm just picturing idiocracy. I don't know if you're familiar with them. You've never seen idiocracy? I have seen bits and pieces, but I never saw the whole thing. But he goes to the future and he's just of average intelligence. Then and pieces, but I never saw the whole thing. But he goes to the future, and he's just of average intelligence. Then he becomes, but he's now the smartest person. And him trying to-

Because everybody else is stupid? Yeah. And him trying to explain basic things. Nope. Sounds like a movie. It's a delight. But there's no way I would not be able to handle that. If all of a sudden I'm the smartest person, I can't handle that pressure.

I don't want to explain everything to everybody. Yeah, if you're being – And then the rage. If the rage you would feel at everything. Because nobody understands you. Because no one understands things. Yeah, and does it feel special to be praised by just a plethora of idiots that think you're smart?

Does that really mean anything? No. I want smart people to think i'm smart yeah and you know you know how like some smart people they are snooty they look down on you right they're they're smarter than you they are better than you but if the whole world is full of geniuses you know what i mean like they they're not better than anyone else everyone's just great so then you then you're different. Would you get sympathy? Would you get empathy as being the idiot?

Would they look at you? Oh, if you're the idiot? Yeah. Yeah, well, look. Look at history, Mike. We look back at history. People that were different in history, we didn't understand them. We certainly thought they might have special powers or you needed to do different things to get rid of their problems.

I don't think the geniuses would burn me as a witch, though. I think that they would see right through it. I think they'd take care of me. They might think something's wrong with you and they want all geniuses. They'll take care of you. Now, could they use their smart power to make me smarter with all their technology. That's a good question. I see an advanced civilization here with a world full of geniuses.

I like how being a genius equates to having great technology and power. Yeah. So are there no geniuses right now? No. Oh, Elon Musk is very smart. He is, but he hasn't made me like rocket shoes yet. Right. Which is the base level of genius. Flying cars, schmars. made me like rocket shoes yet right but which is the base level of genius where

flying cars schmars where's my rocket shoes where's my rock where's my hoverboard like a real one yeah hoverboard you promised me that a long time ago hoverboards should be doable i mean they really like yeah but not for 150 000 in a team of 47 engineers give me one i can buy at walmart that's what i thought we would be here. You can, but it actually has wheels on it. Yeah, that's a big lie. How did that happen? We just call it.

Who went? How did? Okay. Al Borland's probably sending us pictures of hoverboards. I know they make hoverboards now with like. We're talking about a world that is just, you're the only smart person. Everyone else is an idiot.

Do we live in that world that we accepted that hoverboards are these skateboards, but the wheels are on the side? There's no hovering that is going on. It is, in fact, a wheelboard. What's funny is if you make a hoverboard, what's the real practicality of that? I mean, it's really not that practical. Is that the difference between a hoverboard and a skateboard is just you're off the ground a little bit?

That's not that cool. What? Of course it's super cool. I think I'm on Andy's side here. You don't think it's that cool? I mean, other than skating on the ocean or something. No, you can't. No.

Back to the Future rules says you can't go on the water. Oh, I did die over the water. You need a power source. Didn't the pit bull get over the water? Yeah, because of the power source. Okay. Yeah. Splendid.

I'm out of control. I am going to be an idiot in a world full of geniuses. You're darn right. And from the website, you're in a situation that requires you to clean up after a crime. Been there. Would you rather call- Who amongst us has been here? Would you rather call your spouse to help you and risk having them get caught with you?

Okay, okay. Or do it all by yourself but never be able to tell them about it? Oh. Interesting. So do you, I mean, partners in crime here. Wow, this is. I don't think I'm so self-sacrificial that I would not include my wife on the risk. Now, is it the risk part that you want to share, or is it the cleaning part?

It's the cleaning part. Yeah. But I'm not. I don't want to clean up this mess. I just feel like she'd be able to help me significantly, think about things I haven't thought of. It's easy to get caught for murders these days. Am I right? Oh, the investigators are so good. For sure for sure i mean this ain't the 90s yeah kids don't

do murder um it's bad you're gonna get caught i'm definitely just say no just say no to murder no to murder um i i have to bring in my wife here yeah because there's zero chance I can clean it up. Good enough. Like, basically, I'm saying, do you want your wife to have a chance to go down for you or guarantee that you are done? Right. So I want a chance for us to both live a life with each other from here on out. I'm not a great cleaner. Now, let me ask this question. If you're cleaning up a murder, is, couple things of newspaper just laid on, is that going to handle it?

Is that going to throw them off the scent? Back in the 90s, it did. I think you have to go back a little while later and scoop up the newspapers and throw them out. Yeah, you got to change them every once in a while. This is not a letterbox or something. or throw them out. Yeah, you got to change them every once in a while. This is not a letterbox or something. Mike is treating, taking care of a cat

and cleaning up a murder identical in Mike's mind. It's not that different. It's not that different. You're going to need your wife, Mike. You're going to need some help. Yeah, it would be, I mean, if you pulled it off yourself, I don't feel like I would have a hard time moving on without sharing this secret. But I guess I haven't.

That one's just for me. Yeah. You would have a hard time? Oh, man. That would eat at me. Guess what I did for the rest. I can't tell you. Just knowing.

Just holding on a secret. Guess what I did today. Can't tell you. Did you take the garbage out? No, no, no. Did you take the dog for a walk? New haircut? No, no, no.

You're way off. Ask me if I did murder. Ask, ask. I did, I did. I did murder. Oh, that feels good to get off the chest. Ask me if I did murder. This is your wife's response to you.

Come on. Come on. Ask me. Ask me if I did murder. Ask me. I did. I did murder. You need to clean it up.

That's the bonus surprise. I need help cleaning. Oh, my gosh. Turns out murder's very messy. Yes, yes. Also, we're all going to jail. Yes. Including our wives.

And remember, kids, don't do murder. That's right. Don't do murder. Al, should we do one more of these or move on? Let's move on. All right. Shop with Rakuten and you'll get it. What's it?

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The Situation Room. I feel like we were just in the Situation Room. We did some murder. We got to take care of it. We had a situation. Yes. All right, Felix from Patreon. The cat.

Thank you for your support. Yeah, thank you for supporting the show. Fly away from the light post. Oh, okay. It was a flying cat joke. Yeah, not bad. Felix the owl. Oh. Now it's an owl joke. Oh, okay. It was a flying cat joke. Yeah, not bad. Felix the owl. Oh.

Now it's an owl joke. I'm lost. After the smash success of seedless watermelons. Oh, they're great. It is time to take the next step. You're asked to come up with the perfect combination of shape, taste, texture for a fruit and an aim to go with it. What creation do you present to the world? All right.

Let's get them creative juices going. Can I get like an apple I don't have to chew as long? That's called apple juice. Done. All right. The problem with apples is you've got to chew them too much? The problem with all fruits and vegetables in general is that you have to chew them too long. I think that's a you problem, bro.

You guys are just a few chews and a swallow? I have never once eaten an apple and gone, man, I've got to chew this too much. I mean, what kind of mush, mush apples are you eating? No, no. Maybe like a carrot. I'm talking about the peel. The peel on an apple? Yeah.

That's the problem? Yeah. Okay. I don't know. Apples are delightful. You don't relate to that. No, I do not. If you eat a carrot, don't you have to chew it a little too much?

Yes, a carrot, sometimes you have to chew and chew and chew. You need that ranch to help break it up. But I think that's the end of my list of difficult. With the seedless watermelon situation, if there were only seeded watermelons, would that have been at the top of the list? Taking the seeds out of watermelons? I don't know that it would have been. It should have been because it's magical.

The fact that they still sell watermelons with seeds is it's crying it's it's yeah it's a it's like when you buy the the like this like a seedless orange there's a freak you can do that oh yeah dude like cuties there's no there's no seeds in them you know how once hashtag like i don't need a lot of fruit that's what i just learned i don't know how it works. How does fruit work? You know how once fluorescent and LED bulbs became popular, they literally outlawed the old busted type of bulbs? Seeded watermelons should be illegal. I agree with you. Who would want that?

Who would choose it? Who would opt into seeds? Yeah, I really liked those inconvenient chewing. If we get rid of them though banish them does there come a point where you don't have any watermelon at all don't you need some type of seed they have to plant something for the seedless watermelon but it's it's a genetic thing that they've done but they're not they're not just 3d printing it in the lab. So do they have a watermelon with seeds? One master watermelon.

One master watermelon. The alpha melon, we'll call them. The clone. The alpha melon. The alpha melon puts out seeds for all the seedless watermelons. Because all it is is seeds. You cannot let that. Just inside is just seeds.

Okay, here's my first thought. Go ahead. My first thought is pineapples are delicious, but they are a nightmare. Put a banana peel on a pineapple. Oh my goodness. Just peel it back and eat a pineapple. We've done it. That sounds pretty good.

That's the problem with pineapples. Let me ask you this. So we try to figure this out. Benign apple? What would you call it? Yeah, would you call it a benign apple bin apple what i was thinking of is what fruits do you eat the most often and how could you improve them because if you improve something you eat a lot that's a you know i don't need a lot of watermelon sure i've got another one but is it do you eat fruits a lot because of their convenience? Yes.

Right? Because if certain fruits were more convenient, you might eat them more often. If we could grow the strawberries without the whole green part in the butt, you know what I mean? Oh, you just pop them back? Yeah, like a grape. That's a real big inconvenience? Oh, absolutely.

Just the bite? Just taking a bite of it? Because what do you do after the bite andy you have to you got to find a discard pile for the rind that you're not going to eat if you got grapes you just pick them off pop them in your mouth i guess that's like eating peanuts shelled or unshelled we need unshelled strawberries yeah i want to just take a strawberry pop it off a vine pop it in my mouth Can we get an apple that doesn't have a core? Oh, that's good.

Because I eat apples more than any other fruit. So is discarding the waste product, is that a big thing? Spitting the seeds? It's not the discard. It's a dangerous game when you're eating the apple and you start biting and getting closer and closer to the core because you do not want to go you can't icarus and fly too close to the sun with it if you get a bite of that core it's disgusting and the experience of eating the apple is completely ruined yeah i think what we need is a brand called lazy fruit and lazy fruit is all done for you okay my oranges them peeled all right my

apples them cord yeah my my strawberries the butts are cut off basically it's just ready to serve and eat we can have uh human labor do this for us we don't even need science i i have something to tell you human labor uh you could go to the grocery store and you can in fact buy like a a plastic bowl full of fruit that's ready to eat those things are 700 they are really expensive clearly we're on to a good business opportunity if people are willing to pay 10x the price of fruit just so it's ready to eat i think the problem is that the people that they have currently who are slicing up these these are all doctorate people they are paying out the nose for this labor and they need to find some really affordable just machine cut them just just build

a machine that can slice everything up and then package it. Stop. I'm just really upset because every time I go and I see the fruit and veggie platters, I want them, and I can't do it. It's a matter of principle. I'm not paying $10 for a little tub of sliced fruit. For you, that's saying something because I think the essence of American industry is the lazy fruit brand.

You don't want to go to the store to get that fast food. We'll go to the fast food for you. We'll make it fast food squared and bring it to you at the house. That's delicious. That's good. Yeah. And you'll pay 10 X for that. I sure will.

Maybe you need to start buying these $65 fruit platters. If fruit was not as good for me and tasted better, like fast food, I would do it. Like if it's the exact same platter, but it was like fried chicken wing? Mm-hmm. What if it was just deep fried fruit? Ooh.

Ooh. Can you do that? Do they, yeah, do they do that? I mean, you can deep fry everything. I would imagine you can. Has anyone done that, though? Deep fry a pineapple. What's that like?

Probably not very good. Oh, I don't know, man. If you had anything deep fried that was not very good. I don't know. Deep fried with the sweet taste? Dude, a deep fried Oreo? Oreos are good, yeah. You're darn right there.

Deep fried Twinkie? Yeah, and you can grill pineapple, right? Yeah, people do that. You might as well fry it up. Okay. I think we're almost there. All right, Vish from Patreon. The killer clowns are back.

All right, I didn't know that. And this time you're locked in an arcade instead of a carnival. Okay. You must beat the clowns in any game in order to escape. What arcade game are you choosing? Oh, it's an arcade. Did we do this at a carnival and we had to choose one of the carnival games and then otherwise we were going to die?

Exactly. I had wiped this from my memory because I didn't want to die. What did we pick? I think you might have gone with – I know we talked about throwing the rings at the milk jugs. Did I do the basketball game? Because that one's – Oh, i probably did the hanging bar yeah i i i would have done the the darts at the balloons but i do not remember this question at all wow well i have a vague recollection the killer

clowns are back i mean they've been gone a while um they've been out doing murder they've been doing a lot of the murder and now they're're back. Which arcade game are you choosing? This is the easiest question of all time. It's easy for me, but I have no idea what you guys think. It's easy for me because I'm with you, Mike. I'm stepping away. Oh, are you letting me play? And I'm letting you play, what, probably NFL Blitz?

I was going to go NBA Jam. Sure. Yeah, Mike's pretty good at NBA Jam. I was thinking of Blitz, NBA Jam. Is there another, like, I can't have. Air hockey? What's your confidence in air hockey? I don't know if I'm going to get killed by that clown or not.

Air hockey has a little bit of randomness involved. Now, I don't have to play against the clown, though, right? Of course you do. 100%. Who are you playing? Oh, I have to beat the clowns in a game. I guess it could be a single player and you're going for a high score. You're playing some asteroids.

Does a clown have limited mobility in air hockey because of them big shoes? I don't think you move your feet a lot in air hockey. That's pretty much a stationary game. But I think I'm great at air hockey. I'm going to say that I'm the best. It stinks to lose at air hockey, and then if you know you're about to get killed by a clown right afterwards, it's even worse.

Because then you have the shame of you lost air hockey. Oh, he probably mocks the heck out of you before he does the murder. He may not even do the murder. He may just let you live with the fact that you lost to the killer clown at air hockey. But what game would you lose and not feel ashamed of losing what game would be like well yeah but it's pinball you know probably one of those claw games where i gotta i do the claw game and i have to get something out of there to survive there are people because i ain't living there are people that can do the claw games every time i used to be a friends with someone who would say

this and for years it's impossible i'm like no that's you can't no that's impossible you know i'm sure you've won before or you couldn't win if you put ten dollars in and try ten times you that dude won every time we ever went to any claw machine. It didn't matter the content inside. He was dialed in on that claw. That was his superpower? That was his superpower. He's the manufacturer of the machines. I can't.

I don't think I've ever gotten some from the claw. I've landed some claw items. I'm decent. Decent at the claw. The only ones that I can get are the ones that are filled with the balls. Oh, yeah. Those are easy. That one I win every single time.

Those are layups. Yeah. the balls oh yeah those are easy that one i win every single time those are layups yeah the the hard part of the claw machine is that you you can't just pick which thing you want or or who was super power super claw player could he say which which item do you want and you would point and he could get it no he just knew which one yeah okay so that's different that's it that's engineering breaking it down. Okay. You got to see how all the toys are stacked. You feel confident, Jason, facing a clown in the... I would do the hot shot basketball. That's my final answer.

Ooh, the pop a shot? Yeah, if they have a pop a shot in the arcade, I think I can take care of that. My bank shot's pretty good. Yeah, I think I would go air hockey if I have to go for myself, but I would prefer to ask for a champion and have Mike step in and fight for me.

I will beat all comers on NBA. All clowns. I will take all clowns on and defeat them. Wait, does this arcade place have a foosball table? Because I will smash them clowns. Probably not. It's a bad arcade. Ryan from Twitter, you lost the bet with your local wizard.

That's a problem. Now you must let him take away one of your five senses. But in turn, one of your remaining senses is now supercharged. Which sense do you sacrifice and which do you enhance? And obviously the five senses are what again? Sight. Sound. Sound. Hearing. Taste. and obviously the five senses are what again sight sound sound hearing taste did you just say sound and smelling did i say both sound and hearing noises they're all sound hearing noises kerplunks and no uh what they? I just named most of them. Sight, smell, taste, sound, touch.

Touch. Clearly, that's the one Andy's getting rid of. I've always... I mean, this one is... I'm getting rid of smell. I think that that's the one that impacts me. I need touch. I need to be able to hear.

I need to be able to see. Although, we know that smell smell is related to taste. Right. I mean, okay. So I don't know how much. Would I rather be able to taste something? I guess you're saying you could lose two. Yes.

Yeah, that's exactly what I'm saying. I wish I could figure it out. Maybe I'm willing to give away my taste. If I could have a super sniffer. A snooper sniffer, yeah. No, a super sniffer, I think, would be an outstanding thing to have. You're backwards. You're exactly wrong.

I am? 100%. It has to be the smell that you give up. Because the other powers are superpower. And you don't want smell to be a superpower, Mike. Are you sure? I am positive. Look, if you're going to change careers and be a police dog that sniffs things out.

Maybe I'm going to be. And all the power to you. But I think you're going to smell the bathroom far more than you're going to smell good things. You know, I remember my wife when she was pregnant. She had an insanely heightened sense of smell like genuinely she could smell everything it didn't matter where good or bad she could smell everything and it was always a problem for her because a good smell is like okay great that smells great but when you get a really bad smell it it's so nasty. It can take you down for a day if you're just smelling rotten eggs somewhere.

Now, if you go super taste, aren't you tasting all of those smells? No. Aren't you tasting all the smells? Yeah, you know when you smell something and you get like, oh, I can taste it. That's how strong the smell is right now. Yeah, but you wouldn't be able to smell. Yeah, I lost the sense of smell. Then how are you...

You can taste without smelling. Can you? Yes, but smelling adds to your taste. I think that's true. Okay, it's just... So maybe you have to supercharge your taste if you lose the smelling. So you really didn't lose anything there on the taste. But also, how do you not take super sight

right i mean super sight that's what we all want right yeah yeah some binoculars eyes there's no way you can lose touch or sight maybe hearing yeah i got subtitles yeah i guess that's true preston from the website you are visited by someone claiming to be you from the future how do you make them prove that they're really future you the verification must take place publicly in front of your co-hosts oh wait future yeah future you how do you future you yeah so you are show me that you know something about you. Yeah. That only you know.

Yeah. But you have to do it in front of someone, in front of everyone. So you can't be like, hey, what's the worst? You remember when I did that murder? Yeah. Who was it? Who was it? Remember when I did that murder?

Who was it? How did we clean it up? Yeah. Well, we called our wife i mean there you know you could have them show you a birthmark or something but you could fake that no no no no the point here is if you have a birthmark that people don't know about yeah you know what i mean obviously if you've got got just a birthmark on your face, then someone would come in with that birthmark. I would just say that that would not prove it.

It would prove it to me. If somebody is smart enough to dress up, look like they're you from the future, they could figure out what's going on with a birthmark. What's going to prove it better than that, though? I don't know. That's why we're being asked the question. Mike, you've never seen this mole. mole okay because it's unfakeable um it's it looks like south america oh this is this is easy jason ask future jason to show you the the mole uh jason show me the mole oh we had it

removed because it was uh cancerous and where was it it was oh yeah nice answer not it was cancerous. And where was it? It was... Oh, yeah! Nice answer. Not. It was on your butt cheeks. Incorrect. That's great. You are not me. Incorrect.

Would you try and rope a girl with, like, a lie? Oh, yeah, for sure. You've got to hook them onto something that you think they're going to get wrong but let's say we don't have a specific unspeakable mole or birthmark speak for yourself

but this is for the people someone might run into this problem in the future it's possible yeah what is the type of question that anybody could ask the future self to make sure that only they would know? I really don't know. Especially, you throw in the monkey wrench if you have to do it in front of people.

I mean, does this person have knowledge of the future? Would they be able to tell you something? I mean, I could do it over time. I could say, hey, what's going to happen to me that's significant in the next two weeks? And if it happened, that's validation. Future you doesn't have time for those games. Future you's going to say, fine, you don't believe me. I will move along. They came back because there's a robot trying to kill you. Obviously. We don't have two weeks. In two weeks, a robot's going to kill you. Yeah. And then when it does, I'll know he's telling the truth.

Now, could it be something as simple as, like, who was the first person I kissed? It could be. If you think you can fake a South American-shaped mole on your butt cheeks, you can fake, you can get the knowledge. Yeah, people can get that info. No, I'm thinking about this. I'm thinking about the first person I ever kissed. Uh-huh.

Yeah, people can get that info. No, I'm thinking about this. I'm thinking about the first person I ever kissed. Uh-huh. I don't know that there is anyone else alive, possibly including that person. That's weird. That knows that that was my first kiss. I was worried you were going to say that, and I am more worried now that you said it. So your first kiss has passed away?

No, but I don't know if she knows that that was my first kiss. Oh, my gosh. I thought she didn't know that you kissed her that's what i was that's right he wasn't oh no i thought she was asleep or something no i just meant she doesn't know if i was her first kiss no one else was tracking with me no nobody was tracking with you we did not go there when you said that she didn't nobody else knows including her i was like all right that's weird but i i think that would be my i think that would be my question because i look my wife sleeping beauty mike you've never seen it my my wife knows you know all all about my past we've been married for 15 years but i'm pretty confident if i asked

her for the name of my first kiss she would get it wrong i think she thinks she knows but she probably i don't i don't believe she knows so that would be my question but to be clear the girl you kiss knows she knows that we kissed yes she is i don't know if she knows whether or not that was my first so you didn't tell any of your friends oh of course i did and if you think that my friend from freshman year of high school remembers that i mean no freshman year huh very oh shoot then that wasn't the right one i would have got it wrong i would have i can't answer it for current me jason i forgot there was one that superseded that okay oh man this is we're getting deep here's what i

know into your path i know that that future jason is an imposter he will never be able to prove it to me have you been kissed before j Jason? I'm still waiting. Okay. Let's draft. Shop with Rakuten and you'll get it. What's it? It's the best deal. The highest cash back. The most savings on your shopping.

So join Rakuten and start getting cash back at Old Navy, Best Buy, Expedia, and other stores you love. You can even stack sales on top of cash back. Just start your shopping with Rakuten to save money at over 750 stores. Join for free at Rakuten.ca or get the Rakuten app. That's R-A-K-U-T-E-N. The Spitballers Draft. All right. Jason has the first pick, and we are drafting the scariest fears and phobias. So we are drafting phobias, and we are trying to assemble the scariest group. Yeah, I mean, look, this is an important day to have the first pick. Yeah, it worked out for you.

But I need to say a PSA. And I've said things like this in the past. It doesn't matter. If you come at me and tweet a picture of this creature usually you get muted and by usually i mean every single time someone tweets i don't care who you are he's not lying i just i just mute you and i will never see anything from you ever again oh it was so funny to nobody ever um but for the next two weeks it's's a block. You're getting straight up blocked. But arachnophobia will be the 101 because I has it.

And I don't like it. Man, do I hate spiders. They are spawn of Satan. I mean, it doesn't even matter if they're poisonous, not poisonous. If it's a not poisonous little tiny spider that can't hurt me, it could kill me via heart attack. Have you heard recently, I mean, look, not a scientist. I have no idea how they would be studying these types of things, but the theory, the hypothesis of our fears,

where we have a real irrational fear that we can't control, the theory is that your ancestors had a very traumatic event. It came down in the brain science? It came down in the genetics? Right. Basically printed in your DNA that your ancestor, many, many moons ago something happened with spiders oh my gosh and so that like as they grew that was just in there and

then then it gets passed down through the dna so here's the crazy thing about that i remember being a kid and not being afraid of spiders uh there was this, you know those big green electricity boxes? So maybe it was you. Yeah, yeah. The Transformers? Yeah, it used to be right in your yard. And there were daddy long legs on that. And I would go and I would play with them. They didn't scare me at all.

Then nothing happened. And all of a sudden, my terror just gripped me. I don't know what it was. That's because your great, great, great, greatfather, Clarence T. Rutherford Moore, had an issue with the spider. He woke up covered in spiders. So you're drafting arachnophobia. Yeah.

I'm going to draft taffophobia. Do you guys know what that one is? Oh, is that taffy related? Taffy can be so dangerous. It's scary, right, if you get it caught in your teeth? Or you're scared of that president? Taft? Yes, yes, that's it. William.

No, it is the fear of being buried alive. Okay, that's a good one. Oh, yeah. Because even entertaining that possibility, I mean, that's rough. That puts claustrophobia in there, and it just goes to another level. It brings fear of death in there. It combines them all. If you were buried alive, I don't want to know what the process is from that moment that you know that you're buried

until the moment you would expire. You'll fall asleep eventually. One would hope. Oh, you will. Will you wake up again? No, no. You'll carbon dioxide.. One would hope. Oh, you will. I mean, wouldn't you? Will you wake up again? No, no. You'll carbon dioxide.

Oh, I hope so. You'll poison yourself. Yeah. Okay. So I'm drafting that. So if you're in that situation, just start breathing rapidly. Okay. I will.

I will, Mike. I will not. I won't be calm. Good advice. But wouldn't you be like inhaling dirt? Maybe small. What kind of cheap coffin't you be like inhaling dirt? Maybe small. What kind of cheap coffin are you buying? Oh, no.

I was just shoveled. No, you're just buried. You're shoveled alive. Oh, you're just buried. Yeah, just straight into the dirt. Okay, I'm pretty sure that if you're just buried alive with dirt, there's no process of you trying to figure out what's going on. It's just done because you have suffocated.

Yeah, I don't want that. But you don't. Let me just tease this out. Because people get, you're skiing, right? And then you have an avalanche. That's different, though, because it's snow. And you can breathe snow easier than you can breathe dirt? Not well, but I mean snow.

People survive under the snow for a long time. What if this is a very airy soil? I don't think you die right away. I mean, snow. People survive under the snow for a long time. What if this is a very airy soil? I don't think you die right away. I think you. I don't think you die right away either. I think you go real quick. Under five minutes? I mean, if you take a big.

If you can breathe at all because there's room for air to get in, then you're right. You're taking a big inhale of dirt, and then you're choking, and then you're going to inhale more dirt, and it's going to be done. All right. Well, that's a good one. Oh, no. Oh're choking, and then you're going to inhale more dirt, and it's going to be done. All right. Well, that's a good one. Oh, no. Oh, okay. Did you have the wrong word? I do have some intel for you. No, that's the right word.

Fear of being buried alive. If you're in a coffin, it would take five and a half hours before all the oxygen in the coffin was consumed. There you go. Yeah, breathe rapidly. That is more terrifying. All right. Okay.

This is a great draft. I just realized that I am going to be terrified. soon there you go yeah breathe breathe rapidly that is more terrifying all right okay this is a great draft i just realized that i am going to be terrified it's spooky season all right all right mike you get two phobia picks all right i've this uh well because i had like i had my number one pick already and it's it this is it's a terrifying thing all right i i guess it it's fine for us but as in this the general public but this isn't like a i'm afraid spiders are going to harm me i'm afraid that i'm buried alive that cause I'm going to die. But glossophobia is the fear of speaking in public. It is one of the most terrifying things that someone will encounter, uh,

at some point in their life. Did you ever have glossophobia? I mean, cause obviously now you've, you've, uh, well, in your,

in your past, you were a musician and you did go in front of crowds. And obviously with the show, we've done live shows. I have, in certain avenues, I do get very, very nervous. And like back as when you're a musician and you're green and you're cutting your teeth, I mean, you're terrified before each and every single performance. Once you get booed enough. Yeah, yeah.

Then you get the thick skin and then nothing really matters. So not as like, I guess death scary as what you guys are talking about. Thank you for the break from the death scary, to be honest. And I remember the Seinfeld joke where the, that fear of public speaking is greater proportionally than the fear of death. Yes.

And the populace. So he would always make the joke that you'd rather be in the casket than given the eulogy in that situation that's a good joke yeah it's not bad that's a good joke all right it's my joke actually oh man you should do stand up thanks that was my that's my beat uh all right i'm i'm torn here okay Okay, we got to stay on brand. For some reason, this one has two words. Okay. I'm not sure why, but we have apophobia or Melissa phobia.

And it is fear of Melissa's. Yes, because they are Melissa Joan Hart. Oh, my gosh. I'm terrified. She was a teenage witch. Alyssa Milano. I'm terrified. She was a teenage witch. Alyssa Milano was also... Is not a Melissa. She was also a witch.

She was also a witch, but she's not a Melissa, so that's good. Melissa Milano is her sister. Alyssa minus the M. All right, so go on. It's the fear of bees. Oh.

Certainly. You are really quite afraid of bees. Are you the same with wasps, too? Yes. Yeah. Things that fly and have stingers. Here's the true problem about wasps, hornets, bees. When they're flying, you have no idea where they are going to go

because they have no idea where they're going to go. If they submitted a flight path, you'd be fine. And they can't. Scientifically, I've seen these things broken down where it's like, bees don't really make sense. Bees shouldn't be able to fly, but they do. And that's why, the reason they

shouldn't be able to fly, that's why they never know where they're going to go. Eventually, they crash land onto a flower, take some pollen, and then pray to the bee gods that they make it back to the hive, or they'll sting you. Pray to the bee gods? Now, I'm afraid of the bee gods. I'm going to be honest.

Those are murder hornets. I think you should have seen my son this past weekend. We went up to the cabin. Good for him. Listen, we went up to the cabin, and there are animals in the wild. Did you guys know this? I was aware. Insects in the wild.

We've done everything we can do to completely protect this house. We've got a pest person coming by. We've sealed all the entrances. We've kept the doors and windows shut so bugs can't fly in. One little moth gets in the darn house, and the whole house comes crumbling down because of that. The unpredictable nature of flying. No stinger though. In the Wright household, we had a night where a moth ended up in my boys room and no one could catch this thing.

It was just pure pandemonium and chaos of me bobbing and weaving, just swinging a fly swatter. Oh, we've gone. And the kids are screaming. It's a moth. The Dyson vacuum, the cordless, has become the bug catcher of the air. I sucked the moth out of the sky. But then it's just alive in the container.

Not for long. It buried it alive. Five minutes, 50 seconds or whatever. All right. All right. We've got... Mike has two. He has glossophobia and melissaphobia.

Remind me what they are again. Fear of Melissa Milano. We've got to put those in here too, Al Borland, when we're writing them down. Melissaphobia, fear of bees, glossophobia, fear of speaking in public. Okay. And I've got the fear of being buried alive, and I'm going to combine that with a very common fear, a fear that I don't think fully goes away,

nyctophobia. All right? It's the fear of Nickelodeon. Yeah, if you don't have cable and you're fearful that you don't get to watch what's on there. It's the fear of the dark. It's the fear of the dark. That's nyctophobia? It is.

It's fear of being in the dark. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. Nyct, what? Nyct, nyct? It's N-Y-C-T-O, ny nyctophobia that's how you pronounce it all right sure uh but uh i think this is something that you know obviously as a kid the darkness is very scary

oh yeah but even as an adult you watch the wrong movie you you get up at the wrong time you hear the wrong sound and i think what it comes down to is you can't see as well in the dark yeah i think that's a big part of it. It definitely is. That's got to be it. Well, here's the thing. When you're in the dark, do you know what is right in front of you? No.

It could be anything. Exactly. It could be anything. Yeah. So I'm going to go with that one. It's common. Everybody's got it, and it can still get you when you're older. I watched the wrong documentary up at said cabin when I was by myself,

and I'll be honest with you. A lot of people wanted to murder me outside that house. It's funny because. I'm here to do the murder. I'm here for the murder. Somebody call a murder. It's funny because you say it gets adults too. And I think to myself, I am not afraid of the dark.

I'm not afraid at all. Okay. I turn the lights all the way off. I want every electric, electronic. I'll prove it to you. I'm not afraid at all. Okay. You know, I turn the lights all the way off. I want every electric, electronic. I'll prove it to you. I'm a man. I sleep with the pitch black. Pitch black.

I can't even see my hand in front of my face. So black. My black-o-curds are black-o-curds. That's right. But then I'm thinking, like, there are certainly situations. Oh, man. And I think it might be exclusive to cabins, but I was at a cabin and had to walk around the cabin at night,

and that is doggone terrifying. Yeah, because there's bears. Well, I think I was. And night bees. Bears and night bees, and I'm pretty sure at all times someone. Right. Like, that's the fear. Were you afraid as a kid of the dark in your

room um probably did you need a nightlight i don't know i don't remember you need a booboo blanket my childhood okay you know a real fun game is uh in the middle of the night go to like your kitchen and look out the window and just imagine there's someone standing there oh yeah that's a really fun game super fun game everybody go home and do it kids yeah kids just not just kids adults enjoy just do it uh and that unfortunately that is also why jason's first kiss doesn't know it was the first kiss they were it was pitch black it's black i ain't no dark j Jason has two picks. All right. With my picks, I'm going to take one that is somewhat similar to yours, Andy, your first pick, except actually common, applicable in life, and I don't think I'm going to be-

I feel like you're insulting me with this presentation. And that's what I was going for. So congratulations, me. I'm taking claustrophobia i mean the fear of tight spaces okay i watched these videos and i'm in a nice bright lit room and i watch a video of someone climbing down some of these caves oh yeah that are like well first of all i couldn't fit um you know, it's like how. I totally would go down there. The idea.

Tell me how it is. Of like a one-way tight space. Oh, no. Where someone else comes in behind you. No way. What if you replaced the person coming in behind you with like someone shoveling dirt into the cave? How would that be?

Would that be better than getting in the cave? That would be worse. Look, I would rather be in a tight spot than be buried alive. Okay. But I'm never going to be buried alive. Oh, yeah. I hope I didn't jinx that one. Famous last words.

Yeah. People who are buried alive often are, that's the last thing they say. Yeah. I never thought. I said it wouldn't happen to me. All right. And for my second pick. So right now I've got arachnophobia, fear of spiders.

Yeah, yeah. Claustrophobia, fear of small spaces. And on the opposite of a small space, I'm going way up to acrophobia yeah a fear of heights which i have a mild fear of heights like i never thought i don't care you know airplanes right you don't get higher than taking an airplane and i know that some people who are afraid of heights well you you can't get higher than that but go on sure you ever heard of a rocket ship yeah don't don't you think you could be an astronaut jason don't you think you could still have that career how am i getting higher than an airplane without a very specialized uh all right i'm with you um but people that are afraid heights they go on an airplane they say

that scares them that that's not fear of heights to me. I'm sitting in a chair. But if I'm on like a 12-foot ladder, I mean, I'm like, oh, my gosh. When did I get afraid of being just a little bit off the ground? When you talked about liking spiders as a kid and then all of a sudden it hit, that is my story with that one. That would have been my next pick. It's a great one. At some point in time, I used to climb on the roof of my house as a kid. I used to climb fences

and get up high on ladders. It didn't bother me one bit. Then all of a sudden, I try to hang some Christmas lights, and one thing leads to another, and I need to hire someone to hang some Christmas lights. Stuck on the roof. That actually happened, yes. I think what happens is your body

figures out. Your body is always doing the math of if I fell from here, what would happen? What would happen. And when you're a kid, 12-foot ladder. If it's grass. Oh, yeah. You're just bouncing. Did you fall out of a tree as a kid?

I'm sure I did. All 50 pounds of me. I definitely fell out of a tree. I could? I'm sure I did. All 50 pounds of me. I definitely fell out of a tree. I could do more pull-ups back then, too. And I got up, and I was like, oh, perfectly fine. And I know if I did that exact same fall in this body, I'll see you guys in a month. Yeah. Because I'm out.

Full traction. I'll be in the full body cast. Yeah. All right. That's a great pick, Jason, and a very common fear that for some reason gets worse over time. The fatter I get. I'm going to draft calrophobia. A fear of cows.

California. A fear of California cows. Yeah. Moo. It's a fear of clowns. It's a fear of clowns. This one's wild to me. Regular, ordinary clowns, sure.

But once somebody had the idea that a clown could come get you, once that happened, they're creepy. It's multiple things. It's like a mask. If you see a person in a mask or a person without a mask, you're like the anonymity of a clown mixed with the kind of creepiness of like, okay, if a happy thing has turned mean and bad, that's a common fear and it's a scary fear.

It's fair. Well, and with the disparaging of clowns over the last several decades, you know that those who have successfully grown up to become clowns, you know, they've might have fallen on hard times you can't trust that yeah and and by the way i mean we saw earlier in the show they also they will challenge you to a duel in an arcade and they will kill you if you lose have you heard about actual like clown school tell me more tell me about so i i don't it. I'm remembering just like an anecdote. Not a sponsor. No, no.

Is that the one founded by Bozo? Probably not. Bozo is probably one of the reigning alum. Okay. But it's actually insanely difficult to get admitted to the actual, this clown school. Like harder to get into this than it is to get into a lot of prestigious colleges i don't believe that well you should go ahead and look no that's interesting go ahead there's probably not a lot of clown schools so like there's a lot of demand this is the one i think it might have been like steve-o who told that story because he trustworthy source

okay he tells the truth and he went to clown school. I mean, I'm looking at theclownschool.com, and they've got some funny noses. That seems like something that you... You know how you can get an officiate a wedding via online certificate? I feel like I could probably graduate. They probably got a quick online

program. You could, but your juggling would suck. Yeah, you need to be on site for your juggling. What about your clown murder? Really hands on site for your juggling. What about your clown murder? Really hands-on training for juggling. You can do clown murder without school? Here's how you do murder. A lot of murder on this show. Don't do murder, kids.

Yeah, yeah. Never forget that. I got two picks here. I'm building a very strange roster of fears, but I will take this one. Well, you've got public speaking and bees so far. Yes. The bees, it's home.

I just wanted the people to know that I understand it's scary to speak in public. I will take necrophobia, which is not the fear of being buried alive. It's just the fear of death or the fear of dead things and the people out there they don't like dead things i feel like that's a twofer it is really especially when you describe it as two phobias i just it's a it's like a flex position pick that i just said i would imagine that those things have different phobias no no no definitely don't research anything i'm talking about i believe the one you said is the fear of death, right? When I, whoever gave me the definition, they gave me both of them.

So I will take that. And then with my final pick, I don't know that this is a common one, but this is one I have because I pride myself on my memory. So I will take athasagoraphobia, which is the fear of forgetting. The idea that I will get old and I will start to lose my memory. But you won't know. And you don't know. It is terrifying to me.

And it's only terrifying now because if it happens to you later, you won't know. You won't know. That's why I'm not afraid of it.'s probably the way death goes too once you're dead you're probably not afraid of it anymore well what was i so worried about some of these when they happen to you're worse off than the fear of them like i don't know the spiders or the bees yeah or the heights potentially um so i i in researching phobias, one of the phobias I found interesting was a fear of being forgotten. That's actually, wherever I was looking, that's kind of included in the- You just got four phobias.

You guys need to learn how to draft. You've got to up your game. Yeah, I think that I've had some dreams in the past where I am existing in a world and I am trying to interact with people and everybody's doing their normal life around me. Nobody sees you. Nobody's paying attention to you. It's bad. No, it's not good. All right.

I'm going to go with this last one because of what it can do even when you don't want to be afraid of it. There's something that just... Taco bellophobia. Right. Even if you don't want to be afraid, something. There's something that just... Taco bellophobia. Right. Even if you don't want to be afraid, something happens. The things it can do to you. It's hemophobia,

which is the fear of blood. And in particular, a lot of people are very afraid of blood in general. But I am more... It's incredible what happens to your own body when you see your own blood. This happens to people when they get their blood drawn. They pass out.

I can see other people's blood and I'm a little bit. Do you have a problem with your own blood? I have a problem with my own blood. Not to the point of passing out, but like I had to cut the I was working on something. I sliced my finger open. I got deathly nauseous for like 30 minutes because I saw so much blood coming out and I knew I was practically I knew I was fine I got it all wrapped up but when I started thinking about it again I started getting I almost threw up I was like over a trash can it's wild my

I had my dad passes out almost every time he gives blood I had a friend who had a a story did you have a friend jason yes uh it was it was it was clarence moore a friend's husband is a tall big guy okay and this the story went like this he's walking into his kitchen and he banged his uh hand on the on some sharp thing on the counter like a corner yeah just and and he lifted it up, and his hand was bleeding. So he immediately passed out and smashed his face into the counter, broke his nose, and the wife comes in, and he's on the ground in a pool of blood passed out because he bonked his hand on the counter. That dude had a fear of blood.

That's what I mean. And you can tell yourself you're fine, and your body knows something's wrong with it. And when you see blood, it's weird. What's funny for me, I mean, my kids have that unbelievable. Oh, they all do? My boys. And, like, they scratch themselves. They go full panic. Is it bleeding? And then they're like, themselves, they go full, full panic.

Is it bleeding? And then if like, yeah, it's bleeding a little bit. Bleeding means it's serious. Oh, you're, you need to go to the hospital. I have like, I have absolutely no problem with, with scrapes cuts. It really, any type of injuries, blood, it, my own, it's never bothered me. But what bothers me and always gives me the quiver down the spine when I first see it is stitches. Really? If somebody has something stitched up and it's, oh, let me see it, I will go, what?

I'll become accustomed to it after that, but it's this weird reaction, especially when I have no reaction to any other type of injury. It does seem a little weird that you're like, hey, can I see it with that fear? Oh, well, you've got to see it. You've got to check. Come on. If your friend has stitches and they say, hey, you want to check it out? Yeah, I want to see it. Of course you do.

You've got to know your limits. And with my limits, and this kind of ties right in for the final pick here yeah i'm taking trypanophobia oh this is needles isn't it it is needles but like mike it is defined as an extreme fear of medical procedures involving injections yeah needles and injections is what i got yeah so on my list oh i i you have a real issue with this so i do i have a lot of things to be honest i have a real genuine deep you know spidery fear of well because i recognize everything's relative to the spider fear which is max i recognize in you know intellectually that the fear of spiders is stupid you know i'm not afraid of

scorpions scorpions can hurt me far more than spiders i don't that they don't they don't bother me um that needles are not gonna i mean you know in general that's not gonna hurt me but i have such a fear and it's not it's not actually of the needle, I got my flu shot the other day. How'd that go? No problem. Wait, what? Not afraid of it. Didn't hurt. It was nothing. It was absolutely the easiest thing of all time.

Because I got that in my shoulder. But for me... For drawing blood? Wait, did you watch? I did not watch. Okay. But it's when you draw blood. When you go in a vein.

Oh, I mean, my arms, like the underside of my elbow, I can't even be touched there. And then you bring a needle and put it inside of my arm to take my blood out. Oh, man. You say your dad passes out every time. You get close? I get close. I always. I remember getting the health

insurance blood draw here for the company and i know that one man made a big deal out of this it was me hey uh out of curiosity al so that the people at home can learn a little bit more about you we named 12 fears out of those 12 give me the one or two that is at the top of your list what do you think um that would probably be uh the being buried alive and uh interesting yeah heights those would probably be the two i guess it's not always about the practicality of like we don't have like a lot of high likelihood that we'll be buried alive in the near future. But once you start thinking about it. Yeah, I get it.

You said heights for your second one? Yeah. I don't know if there's an actual phobia for like the fear of being startled, but that would be high on my list if there is one. Interesting. Were there other ones we left off? You know, fear of sharks. Fear of flying I know is a fairly common one i i brought

up this before maybe uh to these guys but al i don't know if you've heard of it have you ever heard the of the fear of holes like closely clustered holes no like honeycomb and things like that's a common if you're out there with that fear send me a little dm on twitter i want to i want my people get a support group it support group going. It's weird, man. It's a weird phobia. Alright, we're done. What did we learn today? I learned

that Jason does not necessarily know who his first kiss is. I think I do now. I worked my way back there. I learned that in Arizona, cats can fly off of light back there. I learned that in Arizona, cats can fly off of light poles. And I learned that

a newspaper will only clean up a murder for so long. That's not a permanent fix, Mike. It's not. Very temporary. Alright, that'll do it for us. Hope you enjoyed this show. If you did, could you leave us a review over on Apple Podcasts? That would be appreciated. And we'll be back with you next

week. Goodbye. Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast. To see what other nonsense the guys are up to, check out SpitballersPod.com.