Spitballers Comedy Podcast - Spit Hits: The Love Jump & The Best Christmas Traditions - Comedy Podcast

Episode Date: August 24, 2023

Spit Hit for August 24th, 2023: Today we talk about traveling by toilet, burning down your own house, and a pilot that is very lucky to be alive. Then, in honor of the season, we bring some positivity into the world with a draft of the best Christmas traditions. Re-brand Mondays with some comedy! Subscribe and tell your friends about another funny episode of The Spitballers Comedy Podcast! Connect with the Spitballers Comedy Podcast: Become an Official Spitwad: SpitballersPod.com Follow us on Twitter: Twitter.com/SpitballersPod Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/SpitballersPod Subscribe on YouTube: YouTube.com/Spitballers

What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the Spitballers Podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason. Jingle-y, ba-dingle-y, what up, Mr. Kringle-y? Hey! All right. jingly badingley what up mr cringly hey all right oh mr cringly i actually really like that one because i know that you were not prepared no i wasn't this was fly by the seat of your pants and and I... Oh, my goodness gracious.

Like, your pants are looking fine. I know it's good when Mike breaks out halfway through the scat into one of his cackle laughs. Oh, Mr. Kringley? That's right. Bajingles and bajingles. People take liberties with those names to make it rhyme with what you need it to rhyme with. That was... I mean, you got your catchphrase in there. Not bad, right?

No, not bad at all. It's been a while. Welcome into the Spitballers episode 176. If you couldn't tell already, it is Christmas time around here. We've got a best Christmas traditions draft. It's not just around here. You said it was Christmas time around here, but it's... Everywhere?

It's great. Like, if you are in a region that celebrates the holiday of Christmas, it is Christmas time. Now, to be fair, they could be listening to this years later, which would still be Christmas time if it is exactly on the year later. But months later, now we've got a problem. Best Christmas traditions, and just to, you know, this is the Spade Ballers podcast, so I might as well start here. In the southern hemisphere of the world, Christmas is still the same day, it's just summertime.

Yes. Okay. That is true, and when you actually start to think about it it's very bizarre because like we're in arizona and even though i have never in my entire life experienced the snowy christmas the white christmas the the picturesque this is what christmas actually looks like it's never looked like that for me. I've been here. I've been in California.

But still in my head, you were like, what does Christmas look like? Okay, well, there's snow outside. There's pine trees. I mean, Santa's on a sleigh. Yes. No matter where in the world, Santa's on a sleigh. He's not in a golf cart. No, he's not.

There's no wheels on that thing. He's not rolling down sleigh. He's not in a golf cart. No, he's not. There's no wheels on that thing. He's not rolling down the street. He's not coming from the pool. But he does go down the chimney the opposite direction in Australia. Yeah, that is accurate. And he drives a sleigh on the other side of the road. Yeah, the wrong side. Follows the law.

He's a law-abiding. the wrong side but what i what i haven't thought of is do like do australians what is christmas to them what is like what is the what does that look like this is why i brought it up i have no idea i've never been there i mean i don't know what the the seasons in the southern hemisphere are opposite right yes they are and it's weird that means it's their winter is their what like may june july yes my guess and i i've obviously i could be wrong here my guess is that it's 100 the same like the the picturesque i think that they also think of a snowy christmas now that could be massively ignorant because of the hemisphere I live on.

So I'm excited to learn once this episode comes out. Sounds very American. Australia, please let us know. I do know for a fact that the sleigh are pulled by kangaroos and not reindeer. I know that's a fact. You know how hard it is to get reindeer down in Australia?

And then obviously all the elves are koala bears. But other than that, I don't know anything else about their Christmas. I figured it's a fact. You know how hard it is to get reindeer down in Australia? And then obviously all the elves are koala bears. But other than that, I don't know anything else about their Christmas. I figured it was emus. But I looked up, when is winter in Australia? Winter 2022 will begin on June 1st and end August 31st. That's strange. That's not just strange. That breaks your brain.

So that does mean that you can live in winter all the time if you split your time between the northern and southern hemispheres. That is true. You could be permanently winter. Yes, because of the old earth on its axis or slightly tilted. Yes. I know you're just

waiting to get into the real detailed science, but I'm going to hold you off, Mike. Okay. Don't go PhD on us just yet. I know it's tempting. I'll hold it. Thank you so much to everybody who listens to this fine podcast and subscribes, reviews, and please tell your friends. If you enjoy this, I have noticed something.

Jason's cackling. Sorry, I just Googled. You're deep diving. I Googled Christmas in Australia because this is fascinating. Yeah, perfect. Here we go. And the first sentence is exactly what we're saying. In Australia, Christmas comes towards the beginning of the summer holidays.

That's so weird. It is weird. It's broken. Also, when I said it comes in the towards the beginning yeah that was not my mistake I was reading word from a really good source here yeah why Christmas towards I don't know Google um thank you for telling your friends about us I have noticed something we are a very popular podcast yes on road trip on road trips people love the spitballers on road trips. Being able to go through episodes. We're getting towards the 200 mark.

If you don't have good audio on a road trip, that's a nightmare. That's not a big deal. Do you call it good audio? Oh, yeah. You're like, man, this trip is lacking. We need some good audio. I'm saying. I just did.

Recently. You need something to listen to. What is this? Fire up the good audio i'm saying i just did you know we recently something to listen to what what is this fire up the good audio what is that i'm just describing no no one describes it like that no one what i'm saying is you need something good to listen to audio is what you you listen to you listen to audio of course i do we need some good video up on the screen i don't listen to video i listen to audio oh man all right we are relentless can you skip to the next audio please would you rather my mic was really taken aback by your turn of phrase.

Pam from Patreon says, which curse would you rather have for the rest of your life? Okay, this sounds fun. Which word? No, which curse? Oh. Yeah. Not on this show.

All animals hate you. Okay. So all animals. You know, you got the pet implications there, but it's also wild animals, right? You're out in the woods. You're out walking. Don't want to go there.

The birds. Yeah. Number two, so that's curse number one. All animals hate you. You've been cursed. Number two, people have difficulty understanding you when you speak. Oh. That's frustrating.

When you're on that third repeat. The third repeat. It's an awkward place never mind it's like I give up when people can't hear you like you know I brought this up my wife it's she doesn't have the best hearing and when I have

to say something and she says what again I'm I am filing papers right then it's over I was at a Freddy's restaurant the other day which which is a fast food chain out here. I went up to the counter. I'm trying to ask a question or order something. Oh, no.

And the 12-year-old behind the counter looked very uninterested in his job. And everything he said was, And I got into that point with him i go oh i'm sorry i couldn't understand you fine and his his repeat same volume same voice how many times did you continue to play along before you just nodded and gave up what i did was i said i made a joke that was somewhat like, ha ha, you're going to have to speak up. Then he did it again.

And then I had to make the self joke of, ha, I don't know what's wrong with me. I guess my ears aren't working today. See, I experienced. You fell on the sword? I fell on the sword. Why? For this mumbling child.

Yeah. I don't know what I even ordered. We're in the holidays, and for the Thanksgiving weekend, I checked into a hotel. And because of the world we live in right now, masks and plexiglass. The combo between us. There was no pause. My ear was down on the counter trying to hear through the little slot and i still couldn't hear and so eventually i literally just did the nod and agree i have no idea what

this woman said during the check-in process i didn't know where my room was i just used the map because i couldn't hear in and i asked at the beginning it's just what oh i'm sorry what then eventually I'm just like, yeah, I'm going to leave here with a smile on my face. I give up. I quit. You know what we need? There needs to be cups. What? There needs to be a stack of cups at the front desk so that you can do the trick where you

hold the cup up to the plexiglass. With your ear in it. And then you can actually hear what is being said. Because I i've done the same thing where oh it's bad there's all these safety precautions which good like let's stay safe but did mike i'm at a fast food restaurant on my knees like trying to scream up under the plexiglass still making no headway. Just write it down. Write it to pass me a napkin. What are you saying? I've been there. So the last one, so people have difficulty understanding you when you speak.

And the third one is nightly nightmares. Nightly nightmares. So which curse of the three would you rather have the rest of your life? So the nightly nightmares is awful right i mean terrible if you're having a real nightmare you're gonna be afraid to go to sleep you might wake up sweaty it affects the quality of your sleep as well absolutely but i don't know that it has the same physical impact on like i think you can get rim sleep while having a nightmare. I don't think those are mutually exclusive, but the other two have a real physical impact on your daily awake life.

You know what I mean? I feel like the nightmares isn't going to affect my active life as much. It might. I'm not saying it couldn't, but it's not a guarantee, whereas animals hating me. That's a problem. The birds. When Andy said birds, I was like, oh, man. Birds, we don't even realize they're everywhere.

I still. We don't even realize. You don't realize. You do not realize. You go to your car and you don't think there's birds around you, but there's birds up in the trees. You want to know why you don't think about the birds? Because they don't hate you. birds around you, but there's birds up in the trees. You want to know why you don't think about the birds? Because they don't hate you. They're scared of you.

If they hated you- I just saw another video of somebody hit in the face with a bird on a roller coaster. What? No. Yes. And she was in the high G-force part of the ride, so this bird was plastered to her face. Oh, my gosh. To her face?

To her face. And she has your face to her face oh she has to just grab it and throw it off of her did the bird like explode on the no no no the bird the bird it was like a it softly flew into the face but then the g-forces kept it pinned to the face a bird mask yeah it was a pigeon too. Dirty bird. All right. The animals hating you, that'd be hard. But I can, you know, I could live indoors, I guess. I could fight off the birds.

It's not just birds though, man. Anytime you walk past a dog. I think I'm okay with people not understanding me when I speak. I will find another way to communicate. Yeah. I don't need to find another way to communicate. Yeah. I don't need to talk to people. Oh, wait. Do I get to stop talking to people?

I know that would be a real delight for you. Yeah, I'm taking that one. I can't live without my animal friends. I can live without my people friends. I don't think that I could take the people having difficulty understanding you when you speak because the frustration we we talk more than we see animals. We talk more than we, you know, dream. We're always communicating. me at some point my frustration of not being able to properly communicate i think that would lead me into pure depression like i wouldn't want to talk i wouldn't that would be that would be

devastatingly difficult and our job would suffer yeah yeah that right i do well to be fair people have difficulty understanding me when i speak already on this job. Even if they have good audio? Even with the good audio. I mean, this is good audio, but bad words is usually the way that the misinterpretation comes. But that one's out for me. So I'm between the nightmares and the animals. Nightmares would be a real, real, real problem.

Yeah. And you talk about, I mean mean every once in a while they're fine and if animals hate you does that mean they're trying to attack you all the yes of course if they hate you yeah i i'm so my daughter's been going through sleep problems recently and i've seen the effect that poor sleep or not being able to sleep. I think we're in Arizona. I'm going to have to start packing. I'm taking the animals. I pack for protection. We can do that here. I thought you were packing to move away to where there are no animals.

No, no, no. I'm packing heat. I'm strapped. You're all firing into the air at these pigeons coming at you? These birds are going to take you all off. Block her, blocker, blocker. Yeah, I mean, just look. It's for, you know.

Man arrested said animals hate me. Man arrested for shooting in the air at birds. No, no, they hate me. They hate me. You don't understand. Bring me your dog. You'll see. Shoot the neighbor's dog.

Wow. Okay, so you're taking that one. Mike, your final answer is the understanding when they speak? Understanding when I speak. Yeah. Yep. Tim from the website. Would you rather question for us?

Would you rather be able to fly, but only at five miles an hour, or teleport, but only to toilets you have used before? It's like wave points in games, in video games. It is. Because you have to visit a location before you can teleport there. So when I get to the Barnes & Noble, I run to the restroom so I can then portal to the Barnes & Noble in the future? Okay.

Can we at least agree that the teleport will block you if the toilet is occupado? Yeah, I think for, yes. You're like, I'm out of here. You're like, oh, okay. Hold on. In use. That's not worth it. Oh, hello. Oh, excuse me. I didn't mean to know you were in here. Isn't there a chance that these places could change their toilets out? Would you then go to where that toilet is now located? I think the power is with the toilet itself. So you got to be.

Now, at the same time, look, I don't think this is that big a downgrade on teleportation. I really don't. I mean, I visit a lot of bathrooms. Yeah. Fancy restaurants. I go on a trip. I've never gone on a trip to another state and not use the restroom but you would have to unlike a teleportation like you think of like right now you have teleportation i'm gonna go to uh mount everest well you will you have to have

gone there once without teleportation if you want the ability to use this so you're gonna have to like right now you want to go to france you going to have to fly to France, find a toilet in France, sit down on the toilet. Now you have to use it, right? Toilets you've used. Yeah, but you can sit down and have a wee. Can we make this a number two only toilet? Okay, sure. Now this becomes a problem.

Because I like the idea of you wanting to go somewhere and you have to also take a dump there first. I don't do the public restroom dump. So this is a real what you're knocking on doors in france i mean ma'am no no may i please use your restroom look okay on on a vacation right i just went to california for a couple days obviously i'm gonna i'm gonna do a duty right um that being said most of the time i brought up restaurants or places around town. I don't do that. I've never once pooped at a friend's house.

You also said when you camp, you just don't go. No, that was the question I was going to bring up. If I go to the top of Everest, can I turn it into a toilet? If I take a dump at the top of Everest, you miss out on my toilet. You got to bring one up Everest. But you have to, well, at least the portable ones. And then you have to leave it there and hope nobody moves it. Which they probably won't.

If they move it though, I just teleport to wherever they moved it. Yeah, but who knows where that would be. Oh man, I hope I don't teleport while they throw it off the mountain. What is this toilet seat? Chuck it. Look, I'm not flying at five miles an hour.

Look, I get it that as a transportation method, five miles an hour doesn't sound great. If you're like, I'm going to fly to California. No. But like vertically, like five miles. How fast do you move upstairs? Are you moving five MPH? No way. No, I'm not moving that fast upstairs so now i feel

really slow in the air it will feel real slow but also like but i don't care about flying up my stairs mike that's not what i want superhero but what would you actually want it for because jumping off of really high stuff no i i get that but that's not i mean that would be cool but it you're are you using this as a form of transportation in any way shape or form no i mean that's what i mean you're not five the same way you use walking as a form of transportation which i don't i don't view walking as a form of transportation personally um i just don't know if i mean it would be very cool it's a parlor but it's less it's less practical than the... I could decorate my Christmas tree real easy.

It's so funny. Now I'm starting to think of all the implications of this toilet transportation thing. And I'm like, you know, some people, they got long distance relationships. They're like, oh, I want to be able to see my significant other. But I got to go take a dump in a new place first. That's tough. That's tough, especially if you're in the dating process. Right.

Once you're married, whatever, you can poop in front of each other. But when you're in that dating life, you're not in front of each other, but in the same house. But once you're married, you just drop down and poop wherever you want. Does that come in a honeymoon set? Yeah, I mean, you're right. The dating process. And telling your new boyfriend, girlfriend, like, look, I have a superpower. I can teleport to your place, but I will need to take a poop in your toilet.

I will need to take a quick dump. Now, what if you don't? I mean, this is like Mike said. Okay, you can always, you know always squeeze out a little urine sample, but you can't just manufacture a bowel movement. Not always. That's why this teleporter would be carrying a lot of mucilax or whatever it's called. Yeah, no, a lot of like pills.

Not suppository. I'm going to go the pill route, but you need to be able to provoke. Yeah, that stuff. I'm still taking the teleportation. I but you need to be able to provoke. Yeah, that stuff. I'm still taking the teleportation. I mean, this would be incredible. And I think it would really change my travel behavior. I mean, I would become a public pooper. I would want to mark my teleportation network as wide and far as possible.

You could live anywhere and still work right here. Absolutely. Oh, man, that's cool. Until our two bathrooms are filled and you have to beep, beep. But think of a cruise ship. I mean, if you teleport onto a cruise ship, you're supposed to be there. They're not going to go, excuse me, sir. Where's your ticket? I see your ticket. You're like, no, I'm on the there. Oh, yeah. They're not going to go, excuse me, sir.

Where's your ticket? I see your ticket. You're like, no, I'm on the boat. I'm here. They throw you overboard. No ticket. Yeah, and then you just teleport home, sleep at night, and come back to the cruise ship. Yeah, even if they do throw you overboard.

Oh, my gosh. Yeah, I'm doing that. I think you've got to go with that one. You have to. Is this toilet portation? Oh, my goodness. Toilet portation. It's been there the whole time.

Oh, man. Toilet portation is great. You're getting a full nine for that one. Shannon from Patreon, would you rather have super cheap subpar sheets or super cheap subpar pillow? Oh, no. This is actually a very sensible question it sounds like you know we're trying to make some crazy issue here but the reality is one of these is far more important this is an easy it is super easy i've done this in my own life recently really yeah i upgraded one

of the two i I just was saving. Oh, I'm fascinated. I was saving some money, and I didn't want to do the whole set. It was being a cheapskate. Okay. And there was one thing that was far more important. The pillow. The pillow, for sure.

Yeah, this is easy. Because subpar sheets, you can actually overcome those just by wearing clothing. If you wear a comfy pair of pajamas you're fine i don't do clothing at night well even still nonetheless all the mode over here yeah uh don't do pants nonetheless the pillow you've got the the softer skin on your face you need that comfort for me it's all about temperature it's temperature no because it that's just the actual pillow that is nice and luxurious that the the sheet oh the sheet on top is the same set yes absolutely wait a minute this is you don't buy a pillow when

it comes with a pillow mine is actually right on this one i see it now in the question but i interpreted it and you obviously would you rather have good sheets or a good pillowcase then it's pillowcase but this is a totally so now all my sheets and my pillowcase are either nice or awful yeah do you have but the pillow's either lumpy or i still gotta go pillow what kind of pillow do you go with are you a feather pillow do you have with? Are you a feather pillow? Do you have one of those foam neck pillows? No.

It's a supportive, I think it's a spring pillow. Not like hard metal springs. There ain't no such thing, brother. You don't have a spring pillow because they don't exist. I'm going to tell the world what pillow I have because I bought it. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You will do nothing of the sort. I have not paid for that advertisement. I have, so this is a question near and dear to my heart. I have a very expensive pillow

that was given to me as a gift by my wife. And she has, to this day the worst pillow that exists wait so she bought you one as a gift and didn't go didn't just do the combo of one for me it's a very expensive pillow and yes she bought me one as a gift and it was it is awesome. I mean, it is a perfect pillow. I've had it for years, and every night she sleeps on this just, it might as well be an empty, it's like a bag that's been hollowed out. It's just, you're not even using a pillow. She still won't upgrade the pillow?

She has not yet. She doesn't care as much for things for herself as she does for things around her. And she has a terrible husband that has not fixed the problem for her. Why haven't you bought her a nice pillow? Thoughtlessness, carelessness. The list is very long. Okay. But every single night, I know she would love to have my pillow.

I will never allow that. Wow. This was a gift. Well, that's because it's allow that. This was a gift. Well, that's because it's your pillow. This was a gift. If we bought one pillow as a couple and we had one good one and one bad one, we could figure out some rotation,

but she got me this gift and I will not, I am honoring her by showing how much I love the gift she got me. Anytime she's using it, I will pull it out from under her head and take it back for myself. Okay. Out of love for her gift-giving abilities.

So, in my head, I'm like, you know, what's an expensive pillow situation actually looking like? actually looking like and then i google expensive pillow and there is someone trying to hawk a six thousand dollars okay okay this is not we're not at that level here we're not at that level you only bought one yeah we're not what is this what is i don't even want to say their name on this no you can't advertise that just google expensive pillows there's no you will find one it was made out of gold it wouldn't be worth it also probably very uncomfortable um i just bought one no i didn't uh but i do i do want to know what that feels like now like can you get a one-nighter you want to like i'll rent my pillow out yeah do people rent the six thousand dollar pillows out um well i can't speak for the six thousand dollar pillow but i can i will rent you mine if you want it comes in different there's different

like layers so you can you can have it to the firmness of your choice okay um but i'm taking my pillow i love it i will have bed sheets and my awesome pillow all right mike you didn't really weigh in here uh i gotta go with it has to be the comfy pillow because i'll wear the that'll be brutal i mean your neck's all out of sorts for sure i'll go you ever had a pillow i'll just no no covers just oh i was just saying you ever had a pillow? I'll just, no covers. Oh, I was going to say, you ever had a pillow so bad that you decided you're better off without one? You're just like, I'm going to lay flat on the bed. My wife's. It's awful, man.

It is the worst. It's really unfair. Christmas is coming up. It's already planned. Shoot, she listens to this. She didn't hear that part did she hear the part about the $6,000 pillow

I don't love you that much no one loves anyone that much Al how are you doing today what would you choose I would go with the pillow do we have time for one more would you rather or do you want us to move on we got nothing but time

you always say that Simeon from patreon would you rather go on a hot air balloon ride or skydiving have any i have been skydiving you have skydive mike i went skydiving on my 18th birthday really this is a story i'm sure that i don't know why i never told that i don't think so because i've never heard this yes did you survive? Barely. Yeah, I went tandem skydiving on my 18th birthday. And it is... That kind of surprises me. Number one, terrifying.

Yeah. Really? Jumping out of the plane? Yes. Okay. But so, I mean, I guess there's not a ton to the story. The things I do remember are, because, so, I mean, you're strapped in everywhere, right? You know, the straps go under the legs and in the crotch area and everything.

You're attached to the person behind you. Yes, but they don't clip in until you're about to jump but on the on the ride up um i do remember i couldn't get like i couldn't shift in a position where it wasn't cutting off the strap wasn't cutting off the blood to my leg so by so by the time we're at the altitude to jump my leg is just no it's done i'm just hanging off the side and And that's for security. I'm on the stank. Yeah, but it was just pinching the blood, and I had the stanky leg. I couldn't.

This leg was not. Ten minutes longer, it's going to fall off. Probably. But then I went. So because when I was younger, and I could actually do thrill rides and everything, because I would go on everything except for spinny, because I loved nothing more than the drop. The weightlessness.

No, when your stomach goes up. Oh, yeah. The belly tickles. The belly tickles, exactly. On the big first drop of the roller coaster, a flume log ride, that's my favorite sensation when it comes to thrill rides. So I'm like, this is going to be the ultimate. And so you go do you actually get that jumping out of the plane no not at all i didn't think so you you can't hear it's the it's so loud it's funny because you once you've done it and you

watch uh like movies where they talk about each other like in point break they're all just they're having a conversation like that is impossible number one you cannot hear number two you can barely breathe like the wind is is forcing itself up your nose you cannot breathe through your mouth and and there is absolutely no no feeling of. You feel like you're just standing in the most powerful wind that you have ever stood in, and you're not really moving. So the wind resistance changes everything that you think you're going to feel. Yes, that is what you feel is the force of air pushing against you, not falling.

So were you happy you did it? Yes, I'm happy i wouldn't do it again how was the landing uh rocky no we we did okay uh the it didn't have one leg to use once you pull the chute then it's really bizarre because everything it's been so loud for so long of the free fall, and then it is just deathly silent. Is it more fun during that part because you get to see everything? Yes, that part is more interesting. You get to look around and have that perspective of how –

Do you talk then? Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah. Once the chute is open, you can have the conversation. My leg! My leg's about to fall off! Please get us down to the ground! Now, you didn't do the tandem face-to-face, though, right?

That's not... No, no. That's called the love jump. Yeah, we did the romantic couple jump. The love jump! Yeah. That's the honeymoon special. Now, I'm curious, because when you do skydiving now, a lot of times they record it as you go down.

They did record it. But we didn't have. It's on a VHS tape somewhere. Did you have a big over-the-shoulder camera? Did you follow just this giant VCR recorder? That was Steve's job, the other guy that works for them. I don't remember, but I have to imagine someone had some kind of helmet cam. Did you go by yourself or with friends?

I went with... Did your dad go? No, my mom went. What? Yeah. What? I went with one of my best friends. Did she survive?

She did not make it. Oh, I'm so sorry. Now I know why we haven't heard this story before. So painful. If he dropped that news at the end of this story, all this commentary on it, and then now just a little caveat here, my mother did.

Yeah, the mom you guys have met, that was not my original mom. Okay. Oh, boy. But no, she went and my buddy went as well. All right. I did not know that. Now, I have been in a hot air balloon twice have you

really i have yeah i'm jealous of that okay i have always felt like the hot air i've never done it and i want to hear your story but before i before you share it i've always thought that it feels very helpless being in a hot air balloon because you there is no way to be nimble at any point in that experience right no there is you you are you are at the mercy of the wind something's coming at you we're going that way now exactly you have no control they they don't know it's all the wind right i think so i don't know rudders up there i don't believe that they had any control i've been on two different hot air balloons and i think it's just go up and then there's like a vehicle on the ground that kind of tries to follow you so that they could be there when you land and they

have not perfected how to land in a hot air balloon I mean this is hundreds of years the hot air balloons have been around and they have they have given no care to the landing figuring out like a better way to do this you're just going down to the ground and then there's people down there that are trying to make sure you don't fall over when the basket smacks the ground and sometimes you do there's just there's just nothing you can do about it the name of the game i mean fall over uh where did both of yours land both of mine did the same thing which is we tipped like we turned like we were gonna fall over but then the other people were able to like grab ropes and like i felt like we were cattle being wow you know uh wrassled right yes that's what you do with cattle you wrassle them um being in a hot air balloon is primarily stupid

and really wondering yeah i mean you go up and it doesn't it doesn't feel like anything special like it's pretty cool when you're going up. You leave the ground. You're like, oh, we're flying. We're getting a little higher. Once you get kind of to, I don't know, cruising altitude, you're just really high and you can't see anything of note. You know, it's just. Well, the landscape.

Yeah. It seems like the It's a Small World ride of thrill rides. Yeah, and you can't go anywhere you're in a little box how many people were in your basket are you strapped in um no no you're not strapped in if you climbed over the edge yep they allow it um they say just jump they say that's on you um and i said no i'm good so they jumpers anybody um i I think I know one of them was just the two of us in one was like both were dates like that's why

that's why it's like oh we're gonna do the fancy. So it wasn't like this romantic thing that you hoped it would be? No what it sold is this super romantic thing you're going to have this like rolled out red carpet mimosas and then leave in a hot air balloon.

I mean, goodness gracious, you're in the middle of a desert. There's like a little tiny blanket with a fold-out table and like some canned mimosas, and then you get in this. It's just janky. And then you get in the basket, and then there's just like a dude like a foot away from you. Yes, yes. To make it real romantic.

Almost always gigantic beard. And this was a long time from you. Yes. Yes. To make it real romantic. Almost always gigantic beard. And this was a long time ago before beards were in. This was like, I just don't want to shave guy. Oh. So. And he's controlling whether you live or die. That is correct. He is not controlling where we go.

He has no control over that. If you are coming at some power lines his choice is under them or over there i would always choose you gotta go over if you see the size of a hot air balloon you're never going under power lines ever the big bearded guy go i'm trying to make a decision here guys what do you think over or under i've always thought i could go under one of these all right we've got to move on. Is this real life? All right, is this real life?

We share, each of us, we share a story from the real world. Something that actually happened that makes you shake your head, something we wanted to share with each other. I'm going to get mine out of the way. Do you mind, Jason? I don't mind, but mine is a pretty nice segue. Okay, go for it. Because we're talking about flight and the dangers of the hot air balloon. Oh, no.

Where is this going this one is seven plane crashes what in seven days for this pilot ends at the bottom of lake michigan that's the headline that is the article headline seven plane crashes in seven days for this pilot ends at the bottom of Lake Michigan. Did he die? He is fine. He never got injured in seven plane crashes. Were these intentional? No. So he gets this. He's a first timer.

I mean, fool me once. Yeah. This was a bad week. So this pilot goes and he's a licensed pilot and he's the proud new owner of an amphibious airplane called the sea wind 3000 um so he went and he got like a lucky guy he got this aircraft that had not been flown for years um And apparently, maybe he should have done a little bit more work. And so he... Used aircraft.

I mean, buying a used car. So he has... Used aircraft? Yeah. He had to fix her upper. Has not passed the 128-point inspection, apparently. So he crashes on the test flight in California that day. The landing was bad um a lot of landing gear problems so it's like a crash landing everybody's okay everybody's fine they are able to fix it up

okay the next day we're not talking the next day uh the the plane had to give it the plane had an engine stall, and they came down hard. This is in New Mexico. So he had a flight. He's in a different state and crashes with engine failure. I scratched my car once, and it took him two weeks to fix it. Right? So then the next day, he has another crash landing in Mexico. They're fixing this up every day.

This is, I don't know, put some duct tape on it? How do you possibly fly after little crash landings? And this is a small plane. This isn't like a giant aircraft. I looked at this thing. It's a personal aircraft. It's unbelievable of like, you got to get back on the horse. You don't have to

do it the next day crash four was due to was he in a hurry crash four was due to the left wing um the landing was in nebraska so he had a successful flight so we got we got from mexico to nebraska that is right the next day's a good distance. Another test flight on the repairs ended in yet another crash in Nebraska. What is happening? Then crash six on the sixth day. A hydraulic pressure gauge was registering zero. The fuel gauge showed an uneven supply skid down on the runway in Michigan. So he's all over the country crashing everywhere.

But he's fine. No. This man is after insurance money. There's no way that you keep crashing this vehicle when your goal is... He's trying to total the plane. And his engineers are like, no, we can fix this. We can fix this back up, sir. We can get it in the air tomorrow.

And he's like, you sure? Are you sure you can? If it's not that, then what are you doing getting back in this plane? I know you probably spent a lot of money for it. No, that is insane. My favorite one is the final crash, crash seven. Oh, we haven't heard the final? You have not.

My favorite one is the final crash, crash seven. Oh, we haven't heard the final? You have not. Since it had so many recent issues with the landing gear deploying, the pilot promised the FAA that he would keep the landing gear down for his 25-minute flight. Wait, wait. How does the FAA? He's like, all right. Yeah.

How was the FAA letting this person fly over and over? Here's a problem. Okay. You shouldn't fly with the landing gear out. The landing gear caused the plane to go vertically into the water that he had to land in first. So he went nose down into Lake Michigan and his brand new many times crashed plane. It was not brand new. Well, that's true for him. It's at the bottom of Lake Michigan and his brand new many times crashed plane. It was not brand new. Well, that's true.

For him, it's at the bottom of Lake Michigan now. And he's fine. He escaped unscathed. And now forever he can tell the story. I've survived seven plane crashes. Yeah. Did you get the follow-up? Man collects gigantic insurance check for plane at bottom of lake.

That's insane. Come on. for playing at bottom of lake oh that's insane yeah come on i would i so you would want to parachute if you went in this man's plane wow that that is absurd mine is mine is short and sweet but it still entertained me greatly and i think it might be something that you would do jason if the situation was slightly different okay let's hear it maryland homeowner burns down house trying to fight snakes heck yeah heck yeah i hear you maryland homeowner oh no i approve of this message and if you see the pictures of this fire this is a raging inferno this thing was burnt to a crisp on november 23rd trying to manage a snake infestation the homeowner

tried to use smoke from coals to fight the serpents in a house on big woods road gotta do what you gotta do and from what i understand the status of the homeowner, safe. No human injuries. Stake status, unknown. Oh, that's a snake. Undetermined. That snake got away. It's a snake. Do they not need oxygen? No, they're slippery.

It got in there in the first place. I mean, it's true. You say, like, you know, stop, drop, and roll. You want to be low to the ground. That's right. To avoid the smoke inhalation. He's laughing or hissing um just rolling no i i mean look my family you know this last year we moved into our dream house we want to

live there forever if i ever found a tarantula there i don't know what i don't know if i could live there i don't know if i could come home ever again and i might think about burning it to the ground for insurance money. I mean, I shouldn't admit that here, but... Yeah, call that pilot. Scrub it from the tape. Cut that. So he didn't intend to burn the house down.

He wasn't like, die, snake. But you're saying from your experience with certain animals, he may not be that disappointed. Right, yeah. He may be kind of sort of fine i would if i if all i had to kill the tarantula was a flamethrower i would use it i would hope that the house is fine but if that's all i have at my disposal it's either live you know it's life or death so yes the house is secondary. Wow. Oh, my gosh.

That's funny. Mike, what do you got for us? All right. So I got a – it's the holidays. We're the draft coming up. We're doing our favorite Christmas traditions. I'm going to go with a good story, an inspiring story. Okay. All right.

I like it. I like it. Look at you. Regular mystery. But I couldn't find one. This one is fascinating. So there was a grandmother, and she sent her grandson a text message inviting them to Thanksgiving dinner. Turns out her grandson had a new phone number and she was texting a complete stranger.

But the stranger said decided to respond and said, well, who is this? And she responded, well, it's your grandma. And then they said, well, may I have a picture? And the grandma's like confused and sends a uh photo of herself over and somehow this conversation just ends up keep it keeps on going and then the stranger ends up going to thanksgiving dinner with this random grandmother who had texted them and this is now something that has been going on for six years. This tradition has kept, like, even this is a sadder point of grandmother's husband has unfortunately passed,

and they're still going. Like, they've kept on the tradition of these two complete stranger families have met up and created their own tradition that they have Thanksgiving together. That is awesome. It's a Thanksgiving together. That is awesome. It's a really hard- That's amazing. I was so happy to hear that that started six years ago and is ongoing. Yes.

Because if that happened this year, I'd be holding my breath for like grandmother- Sure. Yeah. For the bad part to happen? Right. From the bad part of the stranger that she let into the house. But that is delightful. So you're saying if you randomly text some people,

you could end up with a friendship? You could. And you could end up with a Netflix deal because apparently Netflix has picked up the story and they're going to run something about the families that you choose. So it's like, that's a feel-good story, man. There was in the news this last couple weeks, That's fantastic.

There was in the news this last couple weeks, there was some like the Notre Dame prep school basketball team that was making a group text. And they accidentally texted one digit off from. Oh, yeah. From the Buccaneers. Yeah. And it was a player from the Buccaneers. And then they ended up chatting with everybody. Lenny and Tom Brady. We got to start just randomly texting people. Like people like hey you want to not be the best do you want to go see spider-man

meet me here random person no you start with just the text but are you just are you but are you throwing out a name like hoping you're like uh oh that that's too hard you don't want to throw out the name you just you just want to leave it ambiguous. Start a conversation with a new friend. Like Peyton. No, no, no, no, no. Because then they say you have the wrong number. You've got to start the process with a little bit of question in the air. Okay.

I like that story. That's a good one. It's fun. You want to draft? Let's do it. The Spitballers Draft. All right. We are drafting the best Christmas traditions, which there are so many.

And this is probably, you know, very subjective. Everybody has the different things that they like about Christmas. Our friends down in Australia, they like to go tanning on Christmas. They go to the beach. It's the best beach day of the year. But there's a lot of things that people do around Christmas time. I'm going tell you right now i don't know what my number one pick is yet even right now i'm gonna tell you you gotta figure that out pretty soon and so there are so many different things that you can do i'm trying to think of the thing that at my core says Christmas. I feel like that's the tradition that opens the season

that means something special. There are a lot of them, however. Certainly. To me, it is setting up the Christmas tree. Okay. I had two first picks, and that was one of them. Yeah, and I had a couple that I was really close between. You'll probably take the other one.

But, yeah, setting up the Christmas tree is something special. Ever since I've had kids, you know, I have three. They want the tradition done exactly the same every year. We've got to have some hot cocoa going. Okay. We've got to bring the ornaments out. We've all got our special ornaments that we do that nobody else does. We've got the music playing.

So we throw Elf on in the right house. In the background. When I think about Christmas, let's say it's not the Christmas season or it's coming close, putting up the Christmas tree, decorating it with the family, that is one of those traditions that is looked on so fondly, with such high regard. When the day comes and you're having to set it up, it's always a nightmare for me. Nothing ever works. The kids don't want to do it. nothing ever works the ball the kids don't want to do it it's it's one of those that is on my list where it's like i like this in theory but it it's just never what i want it to be

oh i'm sorry to hear that it's okay all right so oh i do have a sorry to interrupt i wanted to google um top christmas traditions in australia since that is what this podcast is about. The number one, and this is from many sources, the number one tradition is surfing Santa. Santa on a surfboard. It's a different world over there.

Okay. That's awesome. Yeah. All right. I've never thought of that one, but I like it. Number two is eating prawns. No, it's awesome. Yeah. All right. I've never thought of that one, but I like it. Number two is eating prawns. No, it's not.

Yeah. Apparently, that's a big Christmas tradition. Getting the prawns on? So, like, throwing a shrimp on the barbie isn't too far off? No. Oh, cliches. All right. So, you took the tree.

My other number one, you got to go with. I mean, come on. It's opening up the presents. It's interesting. Those are my two. It's opening up the presents. And, like, everyone, mom and dad, we have some presents. That's not the focus anymore.

It is watching the children open presents from, you know, from family members, from Santa, whoever. But just watching the joy of them getting surprised, thinking, I didn't think I would get this, and there it is. That's right. Opening up the presences on the Christmas morning. Do you guys do fully Christmas morning?

Do you do the one? Oh, okay, okay. Who wants a little Christmas Eve action in here? We'll see. I was really, really hoping that, you know, you both of your altruistic natures wouldn't not allow you to take opening presents as a great Christmas tradition. Screw that crap. It's the clear one-on-one.

I mean, say whatever you want, but that is, uh, that's kind of the main event. So well done. It was between those two for me in terms of favorites. You get back to back picks. Did you not realize that during this draft you would eventually be picking? I thought Mike had two for some reason and then it was going back to him. I can go again. I'm happy to.

All right. There's still a handful that I really, really love. There's still a handful that I really, really love. I am going to go with the one, though, that it not only kicks off the season, but it also is throughout the season. It's a tradition that you get over and over and over and over, and it's Christmas movie nights. Ah, that is near the top of my list. I absolutely love Christmas movies when we throw on, you know, Buddy the Elf.

And we throw on just, it's always, it brings the family together. The movies are awesome. You know, Christmas movies are fantastic. Some of them? Well, sure. I mean, they're not all winners. But I do. I love family movie nights. And Christmas just makes it all the more special.

What if you picked again? That would be incredible. I'm back on the clock. Here's something that we do every time we set up our Christmas treat. It's a twofer in the Moore family. It is a must on our holiday traditions it's probably our like when we think about just our family's traditions there's two that come to mind that are every year traditions like really like we will not have a christmas without this thing we do

and it really is it's granny linda's cocoa. It's hot cocoa night, basically. Okay, okay. In our family, it's Granny Linda's cocoa. My mother had a recipe of homemade. I mean, we're talking this is not, you know, break out the Swiss mist or whatever that, you know, powder that you're putting in hot water. This is your melting down chocolate. You're putting, I mean, you're drinking liquid chocolate, and it's awesome.

But drinking hot cocoa, that is a Christmas-exclusive tradition in our family. That would be my number two. So your hot cocoa, if you let it sit overnight, would it become a candy bar? Is it that? Impossible to let it sit overnight. Exactly right. It was trick question. Impossible.

You take one sip of this thing and it will be an empty mug soon. And real quick, to piggyback on your first pick, episode 26, we drafted best Christmas movies. So if you haven't heard that, go check it out. That's a good reminder. We've done it all. Mike, you're up. All right. I am going to go.

So I got the opening up the presents. People do this different ways, but I will phrase it as the Christmas light walk. Where you go. I mean, some people do it in the car. You're saying going around and seeing Christmas lights. Christmas lights sightseeing. I don't know how exactly you want to put it, but our neighborhood, somehow our street.

They do good work? Yeah, our street is like- Full psychopaths. Yes. We're pretty close to that point, but- I'm getting there. Where people will drive to go to our street, Yes. We're pretty close to that point. I'm getting there. People will drive to go to our street.

It started with one house. We call it the singing house because this household, they go all out for all holidays, Halloween, Christmas, whatever it is. But they have the synced lights. To the music. And we're talking like if you lived across the street from this house you probably loathe christmas those people because it is so insane but they they did it and now like the houses it's spreading like a virus where the houses next to them are starting to put the lights up,

but they sync to the master command of the singing house. Yeah. So they're all, it's just this huge area now of like eight houses all flashing LED lights. But for not living there, it's fantastic. So you walk it. Oh, yeah. I was going to say the house across the street was like if you can't beat them join them because i i just dropped your daughter off at your house the other night they've

started to get in on it you turn it's like oh it's nighttime until you turn onto that street and then it's straight up daylight but only every other second because you're right it's literally strobe light like there are you know there are certain people that should not be on that street that would cause seizures i think mike should just get his answer should just be christmas lights that's fine yeah because i think that in cap i don't want to like pick putting them up separate from sure because you put them up it's the tradition of christmas lights on the house okay fair enough which definitely would have been my next pick so that is my i said we have two traditions we never go without.

One is the hot cocoa. One is driving around looking at Christmas lights. Yeah, we get cocoa in the mugs. Oh, you combo. And we drive around. They wear their PJs in the car, too. That's the other part. Oh, that's a third one.

Yeah. All right, so now I have to pick twice. Well, I'm going to go with Christmas music. Okay. Christmas music is one of the traditions of the season. Again, it goes with the tree. I love it. I am intentional about putting it on in the car.

I'm at the house. We get the records. We just got the Charlie Brown, Vince. I don't even know how to pronounce it. That Charlie Brown album, the Christmas. Okay., Vince. I don't even know how to pronounce it. That Charlie Brown album, the Christmas. Okay. The Vince. I don't know his name, but Charlie Brown Christmas.

The trio. Wolf Park. We're just throwing out names? The piano music. Great football player. Okay. I see what you're saying. So, yeah, Brooks just said, that's the best Christmas album.

So when you talk to your smart speaker, which, you know, Alexa, not a sponsor, what do you say? Alexa, play. That's funny because I do that a lot. Because, like, there's so many different types of Christmas music, but you're on command. What do you tell the computer to play? Quick sidebar, Vince Guaraldi Trio.

That is what the album is. It's amazing. What do I tell? I say, I did this the other day in the car and I did three different versions. First, I said, play Christmas music. Just generic. Then I said on one, my daughter was like, oh, I want to hear like Jingle Bells and stuff. So I said, play Christmas music. Okay, just generic. Then I said on one, my daughter was like, oh, I want to hear like Jingle Bells and stuff.

So I said, play Christmas classics. Okay. So that's the other one that you go to. And then I might go, if I'm in the mood, play Christmas pop music. Ooh. Yeah, I'm a big fan of the Christmas pop, but it's always when I am auto. Get that in sync on there? When I'm looking for good audio, I usually go with just Alexa play Christmas music. Okay.

Yeah, I go with the Christmas standards or Christmas classics. I want the Bing. I want the Sinatra. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we have the Sinatra Christmas album. Oh, yeah. And between that and the Charlie Brown Christmas album, you don't need nothing else. I mean, you could live on that.

Just breathe it in. Now, real quick, because this could be playing you know, I assume we are this good audio is playing through a nice speaker. Yeah, very high five. Wherever they are. So, real quick, if we could just do this for the listener. Okay. Alexa, play Christmas music.

Yeah, what just happened in your house? Nothing to mine because mine is called computer. And exactly 100 episodes ago on episode 76, we drafted best Christmas songs. Oh, well, there you go. We did? We did. Al came prepared. Well, we've just done it all.

Have we done best Christmas traditions before? Is there an episode I can go listen to? We've done the worst ones, but not the best ones. So now I have one more pick here, right? As we swing back around. You went Christmas. Do you? Did you take two?

No. Okay. I have decorating the tree and I have Christmas music. You guys have done a great job of stripping me of my favorites. So I think what I'm going to go with now is Christmas dinner. Okay. I'm going to go with the Christmas dinner. It's a,

it's the box. Uh, dad, not Mike's Christmas dinner. You can draft that on your own, but the family around the Christmas table, you know, you share a bunch of food and ham and whatever you're making.

And you got music going and the spirit and desserts. Christmas desserts are great. It's wonderful. I'm getting into it. I'm so excited. You're putting it in the spirit now? Yeah. There we go.

All right. Da-da-da-da. Okay. I have. A regular Mr. Kringly. All right, I'm going to go with... These are... This...

Whatever. Poles, whatever. This is a very specific for the rights. I think it's a lot of people actually now do it, but I will go with the ice skating. That doesn't get to happen a lot around these parts when you live in the desert. But at Christmastime, there is... You do that every year, don't you?

Yeah, we do. There is a particular area shopping complex where they deck everything out. They do the fake snow, and they put up an ice rink. And they got the Christmas jams going on, and we always go once a year we go have ourselves a good ice skate and you have which is basically everyone trying to remember how to ice skate and people uh bruising up the butt cheeks a little bit maybe the elbows do skating i don't do ice skate and that is one that you if we had worst christmas traditions that would be on my list because i you should you should learn man it's a delight that goes with his other christmas

tradition of um christmas time hospital visit yes um no thank you all right so i am i am just keep your butt down and you're good okay now i assume this is on the ice it's yeah sure can't fall if you're already there i would love to go ice skating if I get a sled. You just pull me around on the ice. Well, I think they have like... Yeah, I think they could provide like... Not a walker, but something like that to help you keep your balance. A walker?

An ice walker, yeah. It's what they use to teach kids how to skate. I need more than two legs is what you're saying. Yes. All right, so I assume that this one is different enough than Mike's. Override it if you want. I've got enough on my list. But it is something we do every year.

And it is a real tradition. And this is why I cut you off. Because we always have the one Christmas Eve present. Yeah, it's different enough for me. You get to open one present on Christmas Eve. I love that. I've had open one present on Christmas Eve. I loved it. I've had that since I was a kid. And when Tiffany and I were getting married and we're getting our first Christmas,

I was like, is this going to be, can we still do the one on Christmas Eve thing? And she was all about it. All right. Now, can I ask a question about that? Yes. This has been informative for my own traditions compared to your guys'. Is that a random gift for your family, or is it always the same thing? Because we do that, but they always get new Christmas PJs.

Yeah, so here's the truth. It used to be a gift. One of the gifts I will give you on Christmas Eve. Who picked the gift? The giver or? The giver. The giver would pick which one you get to open on Christmas Eve. And now over the last pretty much decade, so this is what it is now.

And I didn't say this because it's lame. But yes, it's the pajamas. Now we always open pajamas on christmas eve i think do you do the matching the whole family no no we've done it before but for the most part everyone gets like a a new pj set that they would love to wear they wake up at christmas morning in the pjs and all right that way the pictures look good close out out your draft there. I'm going to go. There's a few left. I'm going to do reading the Christmas story.

That's one where every Christmas can't go through Christmas without the reason for the season. So my family, we always read the Christmas story on Christmas Eve. Wonderful. That's my tradition. Mike? This one is very specific to the rights, but this is how I grew up. Jack in the Box. No, no.

There's way better than Jack in the Box. You'll be in on this one. Disneyland. Disneyland during the holidays has been a trip I have taken probably 80% of my life. You did that as a kid? Yes. We live in Arizona, so you're six hours away in the car from Disneyland. And if you have not experienced Disneyland for the holidays

and you've got the ability, trust me. Bring your children to Disney while all the Christmas stuff is up. It is a magical, magical trip. Mike, this is a very big show, and if you tell people to do that, it's going to be more busy when I go. I take it all back. That place sucks. My family just got back from Disneyland.

Oh, brother. And it was Christmassed out. And I'm telling you, if you go, you got to do the fireworks show. Oh, yeah. In Main Street. In Main Street. You got to find a spot in Main Street. Oh, man.

It's wonderful, huh? I will not tell you whether I cried with my children. That's fine. But also, I cried a lot. One of our trips, we got my wife's brother to bring his family down. And they are not Disney people. That's like, there are Disney people and there are not Disney people. And there are scoundrels.

But we got them to go. We got them to agree because it's expensive to go. And we did. We did the fireworks. And this guy was bawling. Yeah. Just bawling. And he's like like this is amazing

yeah it's like that's right this place is magical during the holidays well I'll add that to my Disneyland list yes sir alright I'll close things out with something that Christmas does a tradition that I think it begets in almost

everybody which is Christmas giving because it's an amazing time of year it begets in almost everybody, which is Christmas giving. Because it's an amazing time of year with, you know, whether it's Angel Tree or toy drives or families and the ability to come together as human beings with slightly more concern for other people than for ourselves. The tradition of giving at Christmas is one that I appreciate. And it seems like a time in which tradition transcends things that are going on around you, and Christmas can get people just a little bit happier.

I love that. Yeah, it's great. You guys, did you ever hear the story of, I believe it was World War I? I've heard of World War I, yes. Yeah, no, look. Heck of a story. World War I. I've heard of World War I, yes. Yeah, no, look. Second of a story. World War I, terrible time. But there's a story about on Christmas,

like somehow. Oh, the ceasefire? There was a ceasefire, and the opposing sides got together and did something, which is just. Before going back to killing one another. Right, and previously, that's all they were doing. It's like the insane power of the holidays and Christmas.

Yeah, that owl, the Christmas Truce of 1914? Correct. That is absurd. I can't even imagine what they're going on, what they've got going on with their lives. And they're like, no, it's Christmas. Time out. We're all going to hang out and celebrate Christmas. That's pretty crazy.

Wow. Now, one that I'm glad none of us chose was Christmas caroling. Oh, man. Oh, get it out of my life. It's awful. I wouldn't subjugate myself or others to that. awful i would i wouldn't subjugate myself or others to that i was as a child uh the rights are a very musical family not just mine but our entire extended family you have to do i was dragged to oh i'm many many caroling sessions if i opened my door and there was a good group of good carolers

i think that would be awesome right i would not mind that. I think that that would be really good. It's never happened in my life, but that would be great. You're not going to know unless the door is open. And then if they're bad, you just... You have to sit there. All the slow clothes. And I wouldn't slow close. I would sit there and wait forever.

Wait, we talked about caroling on the worst traditions, Jeremy? We did. You guys are staying true to form. Yeah, that sounds right. All right. What did we learn today? What did we learn today? I learned that Mike went skydiving.

I had no idea. I've known Mike a long time. And knowing Mike now as a person who doesn't go on all the crazy rides and does get sick now, I was shocked to find that out. Yeah. Do you have one? Yeah. I learned that the Santa surfs in Australia this time of year, which is summer. Yeah.

And I, I've never really thought about it, but I learned that the pillow is the most important part of sleeping. That's a good point. It's true. That'll do it for today's Spitballers episode. Thank you for tuning in, supporting the show, sharing it with your friends. Leave us a review.

We read them all, and they're wonderful. Enjoy your holidays. Goodbye. Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast. To see what other nonsense the guys are up to, check out spitballerspod.com.