Spittin Chiclets - Chiclets Game Notes Episode 2: Kangaroo Court

Episode Date: December 1, 2022

On episode 2 of Check The Game Notes, Colby and Murls first establish a new name for the show, then welcome on Paul Bissonnette and Ryan Whitney (29:00) for a Kangaroo Court after cheating allegations have been thrust upon Biz and Whit after Sandbagger 14. The guys also talk Beer League Heroes, Check The Game Notes, and give some Barstool Sportsbook picks.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/schiclets

Hey, Spittin' Chicklets listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Here we go! Everyone's been waiting. It's been too long, baby. It's been way too long. One month, and here we are into December. A month of November, absolutely electric in Chiclets land. And it doesn't stop here with Chiclets, et cetera, episode two. And to that announcement, I'd like to bring in Merle's. I'd like to bring in G on camera with me as we make this announcement. And we'd like to thank all our listeners, all the Chiclets nation that has jumped on our bandwagon and followed along.

And we've only had one show, guys, right? But it's picked up steam and we've got a lot of comments, a lot of interaction. And we're so thankful for that and input onto this team name. I'm glad we left it up, the show name, sorry. I'm glad we left it up for the people a little bit. I'm glad we left it up in the air. It makes it super exciting today for us to announce.

Merles, why don't you say the name? Yeah, it was great hearing from everybody. So many great suggestions, but army, you, you were on this right in the beginning. And I think this was probably our most popular chicklets game notes. Boom. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Perfect name. We already got a t-shirt made. I it's it's perfect it's a perfect name we still got the chicklets brand you're famous for the chick or the check the game notes line we are giving game notes we are giving all the inside information that the pros find in their game notes and and that's what it's all about here yep and and we're changing hockey a little bit we're we're

basically i think uh you know hockey development the development job in hockey we're trying to train guys we're affecting the beer league we're cleaning it up which we'll get to later with the boys a little bit as they jump on with us but i think branding wise really good the t-shirt should be selling g can we do any kind i know we just did the thanksgiving promotion which was huge ripping ripping stuff off, but ripping stuff off all over the internet. Like, I don't know, what was it? Like billions of dollars worth of revenue off the merch store? Yeah, we'll say that.

And then we can do maybe another discount coming up a little later in the month to keep people interested in Chicklets game notes. No, we might not be able to do that. No, maybe not this month, but maybe next month, maybe January. We'll head into 2023 with a couple discounts yeah and we'll have more stuff coming to you from our sub podcast chiclets game notes right under chiclets and spitting chiclets brands all the way through it on all the channels you can find us episode two merles i'm so happy to be back with you guys chiclets game notes just rolls

off the tongue like you just roll chiclets game notes just rolls off the tongue. Chicklets game notes. I mean, it's beautiful. It sounds perfect. We're right under Chicklets. It sounds like we're going to give you some little bits and bites from the show from the month that was.

That's what game notes do in general when you're on the shitter pregame, taking a dump, perusing through the guys that you have to play against that night. And that's what

we're going to do here. That's what we do kind of here around the hockey world. We take glances all over the place and visit with our favorite guys biz and wit who'll jump on with us a little bit later mur in sweden still crushing sweden i've noticed i want to make a quick uh episode two and with the new name and the everything that's come with your backdrop i i'm i remember your you had a horrible backdrop, episode one, unprepared, not ready to roll.

Now you went to Ikea in Sweden, I'd imagine. Yeah, it's Ikea. Good eye. And you three hours. I built that myself. Yeah, built that myself. I watched a couple of YouTube videos before to help me. I got to admit, the wife had to come in at the end for the the doors, the hinges for the doors.

She's a pro at those. Like I called her in for that. How long did it take you Merle's? Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait, Colby, Colby. How long do you think it took him? I think it probably took him like to build that whole thing. I've had a key of stuff before.

Pretty good. I think I have something similar to that. That's, that's a, that's a two and a half hour gig right there for you. I'm saying three hours. Yeah, it was three. I tell you, I did the YouTube video, which saved me. It was a two hour job, not counting when the wife came in with the door. So that would be up in the air.

I only made one tiny mistake and I would have had the dots showing on the top one. And there's these little gray plastic Ikea dots. And I had no idea once they're in, like they're almost impossible to get out, but there's a little tip I found on YouTube. You stick a safety pin in it and just turn it a little bit and you pop them right back out. So any Ikea builders out there,

you guys want to get that little gray thing out, but I still don't have everything I want. You know, I'm going back to the U S in a couple of weeks here so I can get some more hockey memorabilia, but you can see here. I got the holidays. Merle's you're coming back for the holidays.

I got a little, I got an American Christmas Santa and I got the Swedish one, which they call Tompton over here. Tompton. Tompton. I'll tell you a little Swedish Christmas, a little different here. I like,

so Christmas, December, we are into December Merle's. This makes perfect sense to get in the holiday season. I love it. So in Sweden on Christmas Eve, they have somebody in your family or a friend or a neighbor will dress up as Tompton, Santa Claus, and he'll come in. He'll come right into the house with a big old bag of gifts and hand out the gifts right to the right to the kids. Right, right, right away. So they don't do the. There's no Christmas morning like you wake up and go see the gifts right to the kids right away. So they don't do the put them underneath the tree.

There's no Christmas morning like you wake up and go see the presents under the tree? No, Christmas Eve is the night. No, you get them all Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve is the night. And so that's a little different. And we're still a little worried. Like, how are we going to do it with our daughter? Are we going to do it the Swedish way?

Is he as plump and as jolly? Is it the same? No, he's actually a little scary looking. He's kind of like they put this mask on and he's kind of a little scary. He creeps in at night. Like it's obviously already dark here at two o'clock, three o'clock. Super scary. Actually, there's your Swedish lesson for the day.

Tompton, don't come to my house, bud. Don't come. I want Jolly St. Nick. I want Jolly St. Nick sneaking in and the mystery of Santa as he usually is. Tompton, see you later. I've got to ask you about Christmas markets. Now, when I played in Sweden, that was my favorite thing at Christmas markets. Actually, I'm wearing Swedish slippers I bought from a Christmas market.

I'll just show you quick. Nice, nice. Full leather bottom, probably sheep or something, probably some animal. Moose, big moose country. You're right. And these Christmas markets, gee, if you you i know you're in new york they probably have small versions of this or maybe big versions i'm not sure but i don't think anywhere in the world does it as good as they do it in sweden i've been to a few legendary ones meats cheeses glug glug will be coming out soon

in sweden i imagine making its rounds which is a hot kind of cider wine. Am I wrong? So, yeah, in Sweden, it's called Glug. Most of the other European countries, it's called glue wine. It's a hot wine. It's usually red. Unbelievable. Sweden's decent at their markets.

But if you want to go to the best Christmas market, you go to Germany. Germany. They are unbelievable. You're there. They're selling the little sausages they're big hot dogs you go down there with your team you're on the glue wine you have a couple too many like you said there's all these little shacks and you're buying all these little knick knacks you get all your shopping done while you're getting loaded off the the glue wine it's it's

really something i don't know why he's not in the u.s there should be yeah i know it should be huge i love it they have outdoor every very outdoorsy in Sweden. They have fires outside. They have, you walk around, there's no lights because it's dark. You go there at night and there's fires around all the way down the pathways.

It's beautiful. So maybe G if the engagements coming up, maybe a little hint to your, to your gal there to hit up Merle's. He can pick something, some kind of delicacy or some kind of fur thing he can buy. They have a lot of fur hats and different things at these markets as a engagement gift. As I know you're big time into that for yourself.

I'm nowhere near an engagement. Don't, don't get that going. Let's not get that narrative going. Cause my girlfriend's sitting right next to me as we record this and I don't want this. We got Christmas't want to come on. We got Christmas right around the corner. I'm like, what do you want for Christmas? And she points to her engagement ring. I'm like, oh, let's start.

We need a bachelor party. Gee, I'm so old now. I don't got anybody for a bachelor parties. I know. How funny would that be? It's like, yeah, Grinnell proposed to his girlfriend just so he could go to Vegas with Merle and Army for the bachelor party. Hey, I've heard of guys doing fake ones. Oh yeah. This guy, this guy got engaged. We're going.

Hey, whatever happened to that wedding? Speaking of being old, I turned boys. I turned 40 Merle's. I know you're into the forties. I turned 40 on November 23rd, kind of snuck up on me. I'm not going to lie. I remember being 37 thinking, not a big deal. 37 ho-hum bad number, like a camp number or something guy would have on his Jersey. And here I am 40 years old now, it kind of snuck up on me. So I could use that bachelor party G in a bad way. And I'm a Thanksgiving, a U S Thanksgiving had my first American citizen, U S Thanksgiving. I do this Thanksgiving loophole also, which was great. I do the Canadian and i do the american i crush turkey all both thanksgivings i dominate it i love it this is a tough season for me thanksgiving thanksgiving

into the christmas festivities i will be crushing eggnog soon eggnog is already in the grocery stores rum and eggnog guy i go hard on the eggnog i absolutely destroy it i i can't get enough of it i love it i actually freeze jugs of eggnog after the christmas season is done to keep it to pull it out later guys do you do this are you into the eggnog i love the christmas season as it's upon us now i have never had eggnog is that is that the craziest thing ever i've never i've just never had it and i actually feel like i would love it i love a nice glass of milk so like i'm into the dairy. Yeah. So I don't know. I guess I I'll wait till I'm with you guys to try it next.

Yeah. So they don't have eggnog over here, obviously. So I I found a store on that's that mailed it in. They mailed me in two quarts of it. But I also have a bag of powder that I brought over last Christmas that you just add to milk. So you just scoop the powder in there. You mix it up. That's how much it's close enough. last Christmas that you just add to milk. So you just scoop the powder in there. You mix it up.

That's how much it's close enough. It's not obviously as good as my, my Stewart. What is eggnog? You taste like it's like really thick and creamy. It's not good for the, for my boiler and the bod I got going right now. It's like going to get worse during the holidays. And does it come with booze in it or do you have to put booze in it?

It comes, it comes either plain or spiced. Usually usually usually it has spices in there already the stuff i get i love it uh and then you can put some nutmeg as the recipe usually put a little i believe it's nutmeg on the top you sprinkle some cinnamon cinnamon get the rum in there stir it up spiced rum in there oh my god gee there's one company that has like a liquor infused already like in the eggnog that you'll see in the liquor stores now i'm not down with that we only go in there for the pink whitney but if you look there is one that already has it in there but you gotta have eggnog my wife thinks i'm insane i found one in south korea one time

and i bought four gallons of it and it was obviously i couldn't drink four gallons of eggnog in a season i end up throwing away two of them but she's like what is wrong with you i'm like you don't get it eggnog is the best you don't get it you do not get it you just don't get it this time of the year this is when it's on it is on and eggnog those cows better be ready those eggnog cows because they're gonna get drained we're taking it all once we get g on the eggnog, those cows better be ready, those eggnog cows, because they're going to get drained. We're taking it all. Once we get G on the eggnog train, see you later. See you later, boys.

He's going to get a podcast body pretty quick, let me tell you. So we got the new name of the show. I love it. We got Christmas upon us here as we enter December. A great month of chiclets, Thanksgiving promotions, everything selling off the shelves. Thank you to the people again. Great feedback. I love the interaction.

We're going to get into some more Beer League stuff. Shower Sheriff, really popular. Some confused people, I don't get it. Some other people, like, that's great. Everyone's loving it. I'm getting text calls, and my mentions are blowing up, as I'm sure your guys' were, after our first episode, which was really really good and

live show as well g uh was announced the other day which was huge uh it was just when was it yesterday yeah and what was the deal with that because i think we're making waves again and set new records yes so we are so we announced it uh online yesterday we are doing a live show on january 1st in boston Massachusetts, 7 p.m. at the Wilbur Theater, a historical, huge theater, which will be really cool. And we put the tickets on sale at 3 p.m. By 3.06 p.m., the whole theater was sold out. So just that's a testament to how loyal our fans are.

We can't say it enough how much we love these guys and how much we appreciate them. But we love you guys. We appreciate you guys. Colby mentioned the merch all the black friday cyber monday stuff we can't we can't say how much we appreciate you guys for buying the merch but again boston's gonna be incredible boys we have some unreal guests lined up as well i can't wait this is gonna be a dream come true for me i'm going home going home unbelievable event i think um you know for you ra and wit especially being hometown guys in the boston area with the penguins rolling into town for that outdoor game that will be the next day on the second so the festivities continue in christmas month of october

like i said i turned 40 thanksgiving actually had sid over sid sid came over for my uh whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa you got to dive into this how are we just hearing about this i know i just threw this out there i i i'm i'm i'm very private person okay i don't like does he want me to move back there does he want me to come back after this is the thing and then even my dad man my dad texts me because sid came over for dinner we did thanksgiving on tuesday which my next day was the birthday then the next day was thanksgiving the thursday but i had to fly to tampa bay to do blues tampon tnt between the benches absolutely crushed it ripped it up dave randolph and jody shelly great game really fun

but sid came over and he didn't stay for long he had a game the next day he came in he saw my shrine to him in my basement that i have i know i have like an old autographed sherwood stick that he used to use and i have like a couple pictures down by the bar showed him that bragged about it and uh and then i was concerned the next day because you know how he is right a little bit like superstitious hit a game the next day and i was concerned my dad texts me he's like oh hope sid plays good today or he might never talk to him again. He might not talk to you. It's my dad's imitation voice.

And I guess I think he was happy with his game. I don't know. I'm unsure if I'll see him again, if he's satisfied with that ritual routine. He seemed to have a good time. I have four kids. I had another buddy over that has four kids and his wife and another buddy and his wife

that have four kids and only brought two or three and his wife that have four kids that only brought two or three of them so it was a gong show craziness um sid was like sid sid and his girl were like what's going on here um we were just crazy and after he left i ripped it up i ended up i was dancing in the kitchen with my wife turned 40 she's so lucky she's so happy to be with this you know beautiful you know eye candy husband trophy husband of hers and uh we just dance the night away in the kitchen to old like uh 2000s 90 tunes you guys ever do that with your girls you guys ever just couple and i was crushing big deal brews too big deal brews got me going i had sick dance moves she's loving it uh you guys

ever dance with your gals in the kitchen is that that's a great move g just to let you know last time i danced in the kitchen was at my parents 50th anniversary this summer and i'm not a big dance guy but i owed it to my mom for everything she does to do that we ripped it up we had my daughter dancing and it was we did um My wife had to figure it out. Whatever year they were married in fifties or sixties. I don't know. I'm an idiot. It was all those kinds of songs that we dance.

I'm a huge dance guy. I love to dance. I'll dance anytime, any place, especially this time of year with Christmas music. I'm a huge Christmas music guy. The day after Halloween, I start playing it and I'll dance to Christmas music anytime, especially with my beautiful girlfriend.

I'd be happy to dance with her. Buddy, as soon as it's Halloween's done, Christmas trees up. Boom. If you don't have your Christmas tree up yet, everyone's like, wait till after Thanksgiving. Is that a real rule? Gee, no, I put it up the day after the day after Halloween. It goes up. Get in the mood. Get the Christmas going, get the tunes on immediately.

Decorations up, garlands, everything, Christmas trees everywhere. Get the get get the energy up, get everything going, get the vibes going. The holiday season is upon us. Christmas is my favorite friends, family, drinking, eating, just feeling good, warmth, fireplaces, all that stuff. Merle's that's how I do it. And I know with kids now you probably try to push it a little harder don't you yeah we're we're getting ready we're gonna be back for uh in in new york for that so we're kind of doing a little bit over here and then we'll be back in new york ripping it up but i'm

i'm gonna be resting up because of that that live show and that winter classic trip when does the christmas shopping start for you guys oh i'm usually a last minute guy yeah i'm really brutal my wife kind of does it all i'm a horrible last minute guy and i've been like that since a kid like oh shit i have a project due tomorrow in school oh shit if i can cram this thing in and i get like a c and i'm like that's not bad you know thank you thank you for that hard work and c just getting by c that's what that's what i was like so i'm a big time procrastinator my wife is a little better planned but she's still kind of a procrastinator but um i i would say we're on it this year boys we're freaking on it we used to always do uh christmas eve shopping with the boys just an excuse to get out and uh you know for a couple hours before all the family stuff starts go

boozed up on eggnog at the mall we're booze and you're oh yeah you're always we're basically just booze and we had most of the stuff picked out but that's a fun little tradition whenever i was home at christmas and i'm home this year so we'll be getting that going again i pictured clark griswold at the counter at the lingerie counter at the mall shopping um it's a little nipply out remember that little scene um which reminds me that's my favorite christmas movie also without a doubt the best way yeah that's i try to get my kids to watch it every year it's so great the music the whole scene griswolds everything elect i i one day want to do my house with lights like that honestly i'm not even joking i would love my house to be completely barfed on with Christmas lights.

I think that like Clark Griswold did it right. Greatest dad. Awesome. Awesome Christmas guy. So Christmas is upon us, guys. Holiday season's upon us. All right, boys. I just got to butt in before we go any further.

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Over 2,000 certified EV dealerships, along with a growing network of public charging stations to help you live electric. Finally, charging won't put you in the penalty box. EVs for everyone, everywhere. The sandbagger dropped now also this month which was i think you tweeted g and it might be wildly talked about in the same thing in circles around the world that this may have been the best sandbagger ever i don't know if that was a fake pump-up promotion or if it was it is it was the 14th sandbagger that is correct 14th sandbagger

where ryan malone myself merles you were there uh as kind of reinforcements um also drink sampling all over the place um you know some somebody's got to do it. Army. It's a tough job. Some, somebody's got to rip the promos or the big deal brew and the pink Whitney shots. Hey, you are, you are our full swing simulator guy to reading the stats to everyone

with, they get you, they get pissed at you on one hole. But other than that, we were good. And, and, and shout out to,

to all those sponsors to G4. It was G4. They provided the shoes for everyone, the sandbagger, as well as full swing simulators. Full swing. Incredible stuff. They give you all your swing speed, where the ball landed. It's incredible.

Which is the coolest thing. It's the coolest thing when they put it together. And Merle's, that was my first sandbagger, obviously. I don't know the production on this thing every guy had their own camera guy i'm telling you when the first one i ever i think we talked about it like the first before like the first one i thought went to i thought it was just g on his iphone just picking these guys up and then i went and there's 15 carts out there driving all over the place but yeah these guys don't mess around and hey that's why you and bugsy i don't you guys i don't think we're prepared for it yeah you're right merles you're

right i don't know if we were ready for that i didn't know what to expect the amount of carts being used by by the crew uh camera guys in our face i had my own camera guy all day he was glued to me like it was like the carolina hurricanes man-on-man defense. Everywhere I went, microphones everywhere, cameras in our cart. And the biggest thing I noticed, too, as a player in this, is I never knew what they were saying on the other side. You never know how they're scheming, which there was plenty of scheming on their part. And watching it back later, we get to see what they're saying over there and

pasha and his crew did an unbelievable job amazing pasha crashed his golf cart if you haven't seen it please go check it out is it was electric there was a tilt on one of the t-boxes at beautiful swickly heights golf course thank you to them for allowing us to go there as well but something came out of this boys bugsy my partner the chillest guy in golf actually got upset not in the fight the fight he's handled himself like a man when he was attacked by biz nasty we'll get into this later a brew haha came about and there was a kangaroo court uh that had to be done and we're doing it today when we get the boys on the boys will be joining us shortly wit and biz i am without bugsy today merles you will be the judge your honor right yes i have a little experience in these sandbaggers

that you said and um i'm just going to referee it i'm going to let both of you guys give your give your remarks and um i'll come down with the verdict and you guys are both going to have to live with the verdict and explain the kangaroo going to have to live with the verdict. And explain the kangaroo court really. Cause it's, it's been a hockey thing in history and dress rooms all over. Say I show up late or one minute later, 30 seconds late. Someone go army. That's a fine. I would say, what do you mean? I'm right on time. They'd say, no, you're 30 minutes late. That's a hundred dollars. And I would say, I'm not paying the team fine.

I'll go to kangaroo court to fight my thing. And it's been a thing forever, right, Merle? In locker rooms. It's always been a thing. And like you said, it's about the fine system. And somebody might say, well, on this paper, they might have evidence that on this itinerary, it was 1030 in the locker room.

And they might have the team rules from the start of the year that said 1015 in the room. So you can bring that kind of stuff one thing a kangaroo court is you usually don't win because the team wants to find money for the end of the season party so if if you're fighting the court it's an up uphill battle i'll just let you know that before we get going well i think me and bugsy in this case would like a rematch i think think we'll get into it with the boys. There was dispute over the ethics of these crazy hooligans in the sandbagger who were on a heater. They beat us.

They've won five in a row now. And then some rules came into account where, guys, I like this. And, gee, you're more tapped in. You get all the messages. You get all the app mentions. You get all the mentions on social media from your fans, your followers, our fans, our followers, a lot of electricity around all the stuff you get all the app mentions you get all the mentions on social media from your fans your followers our fans our followers a lot of electricity around all the stuff you guys do there seemed to be a lot of dispute about the redo rule was it done properly did everyone know and that's our that's our complaint about this loss is that there was a lot of fucking give and take

with what happened and no one really knew. And I said this on those messages. I said this on spit and chiclets. I kind of take fault for this. I should have stepped up and said on camera, Biz and Wit both need to distinctly say what the rules are directly into the camera, because all the listeners that were watching and commenting didn't know about the Cheesecake Factory lunches and dinners and who talked and who spoke to who on the range beforehand. So we'll get into all that with the kangaroo court, but there was a lot of stuff going on that people didn't see. I'll say that. Yeah, guys, I'd like you guys to save this. I don't want any of the evidence tainted before court. So I don't know if these guys are

ready. Do we go right over to them or? Yeah, go g's ready to go let's throw it to the boys they're coming on right now we'll introduce them and we'll get everything going kangaroo court baby come on in boys all right before we throw it over to the boys we get them on we get a little kangaroo court action for you i got to talk to you about game time game time's a ticketing app that makes it easier than ever to score the best deals on tickets to sports concerts and shows and they guarantee the lowest price can you believe that i can if you don't and you haven't given game time a shot yet don't know what you're waiting for you guys are going to love this app we've had tons of barstool fans using it hitting us up on social about great deals they're getting. We have even used it to go to a game time to go to a Steelers game, and the boys are

going to be using it to go to games in Philly and in Columbus. It's going to be unbelievable. Download the game time app, go to the account tab to create a login and redeem code CHICKLETS for $20 off your first purchase item. Download game time, last minute tickets minute tickets lowest prices and it's guaranteed all right guys one more time download the game time app it's easy go to the account tab create a login easy and redeem code chiclets for 20 off your first purchase. Super easy. Let's go. All right, we bring in the two gentlemen,

the legends themselves, Spittin' Chicklets, Mainstays, and Hockey Stars on and off the ice now, taking over the hockey world, totally dominating, fucking absolute beauty legends, one with a mustache, one completely has gone international.

And we are here now, Merles. And I'm glad you are completely done. Actually, look at this. He's got a gavel and a hammer because we want to get down to this kangaroo court, boys, and get it going. It sparked up online. Biz fired back. Bugsy went crazy. I chimed in and we get to do this this this kangaroo court which is a great idea brought up by biz i think totally fair i think

everybody's in on it so merles how's this gonna go and how are we what are we arguing here and and how's this gonna run well we yeah we to talk about kangaroo court and exactly what it is. And like, yeah, like of it and how guys have been involved. I've only done I've only done probably two kangaroo courts, guys, in my career. I think I've only been a part of one. It was a guy making out with a girl like in the bar. Like it's just back. Were you guys in Wilkes-Barre when Scroisey we took scroisey to kangaroo yes

yes i'm sorry so i've been there twice i came in the suit in the briefcase in the whole thing and i think it was about playing poker or something i forget what it was about that's the only one i had ever been in the bus what do you mean you forget what it was about how can you not remember these are like such memorable cases i mean because he's a drinker oh yeah that's right he's probably now when you say a guy was making out with a girl was he making out with just some random or like one of the guy's girlfriends like that no it's just like i think we had like a no in bar in bar makeout rule at one point something like that but in the end looking back that's pretty foolish like that's pretty

sick if you can get a girl to make out with you i So kangaroo court, I mean, just a brief description I would give. Some people are still confused is when there's an issue within a team or a group. Like it could be anything. It's people who work together, live together. If there's an issue, they take it amongst themselves. And somebody gets named the judge. Somebody is the defendant. Also, always he can have a lawyer, a representative, and then there's the plaintiff.

And then there's all these different things that could go in. But in the end, it's the team helping and arguing and fighting and then one guy deciding. So with us all being kind of part of the squad, including Bugsy. Now, the problem is Bugsy's not here, guys. And that's a fucking indictment of itself because if you look at what people do they plead guilty and then the court case takes two minutes and they basically don't even show up that's what him not showing up does it proves to me he knows he's guilty and he knows he lost but i'll stop talking it's not my podcast i know i

would agree i agree yeah murals hit the gavel jesus let's sleep in the gavel let's get to the let's get to today's proceedings here all right let's go good afternoon i'm justice murals this is the first ever spit and chiclets kangaroo court docket 001 we have the plaintiffs ryan bugsy malone and colby army armstrong versus the co-defendants Paul Biz Biz Nasty Bissonette and Ryan Whit Whitney now the plaintiffs are accusing the defendants of illegal rule procedures during the last sandbagger objection can I can I object no this is not your turn to the opening remarks I would like your turn to eject okay i just want to make sure that it's called the scam beggar not the sandbagger from now on hey order order order bailiff okay all

right so at this time plaintiffs will open this up for your opening statements you have one minute that's us that's me that my partner isn't here. Hello, Your Honor. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for holding this proceedings. I'm the arm dog. I'll be representing myself and my team today in this matter. Arm dog and Bugsy versus biz and wit and sandbagger ink. Okay. Or as myself and Bugsy like to call it the scam bagger all right we've made there's been some allegations to the legitimacy of the sandbagger 14 and the ethics of this match my co-plaintiff could not be here your honor bugsy malone could not make it but i have a doctor's note okay i have a doctor's note you can see there have a doctor's note. You can see there. Please submit this to evidence.

Yep. This is exhibit a, I will submit it to you now. It's a doctor's note that he is in pain and suffering. Okay. Over this public humiliation and disaster of a sandbagger. And also at the bottom, it says that he has a concussion.

Okay. But he's got a hot nurse. Bugsy's got a concussion, boys. And I think we all know why. I'll get to that a little bit later. Obviously, I want to get hashtag pray for Bugsy going. I want that to start trending, people. Hashtag pray for Bugsy.

You could make it here today with me to represent this case in regards to the Sandbagger 14 and the rules and the redo rule and a few other things I'd like to submit as we get going. Your honor. Thank you. Thank you. You may be seated. Defendants, you have one minute for your opening statement. Okay. Well, I'm representing myself and my buddy there, Biz Nasty, Biz Sinet. And it's pretty plain and simple. I'll kind of go back a little bit. We've, I think, had done about 13 of these things and Biz said, Hey, what I want to, I want to add something. I want to switch something up. I want to do a redo where you can make each guy one time, redo a shot. He said, I want to add a one club. I said, okay, biz, you know,

he comes up with all these ideas, a hundred percent biz I'm in while the first sandbagger, we were going to do it against was army and malone because of that we went out to lunch the day i'm not even going to give my entire we went out to lunch the day before all the rules were explained all the rules that were thought of by my guy biz were explained to these two people it was clear as day and they knew the rules okay we can get into why that's happening and why they think they didn't hear correctly. But when I have the chance to have more than one minute or biz, we'll explain exactly what went down. And you listeners at home can understand these two guys are complete fucking idiots, morons to the highest level. They don't listen. They don't pay attention. And it's on them.

Your Honor, if I could just add a few a few sentences, please. Go ahead, sir. It wasn't, in fact, at lunch. We were actually at Cheesecake Factory, and it was dinner with. I understand where you may be confused because we did a lunch, then a dinner there. We double dipped on Cheesecake Factory. But Bugsy Malone was sitting with us when we went through the breakdown of the rules.

So he actually had thought and input into the rules, and that's why we thought that his team would have known army was sitting at the other end i wasn't he was or maybe wasn't at cheesecake but bugsy malone was there when we talked about it and uh as far as the the injuries and stuff we can get into that later, but that's complete bullshit and completely false. Sorry about my language, Your Honor. All right. There's the opening statements.

We're going to move now to the plaintiff. If you have a witness or some evidence you want to submit, the floor is yours. I've already submitted Exhibit A in my opening, just to get that out there. Also, this is for the unethical Sandbagger 14 and in hopes that possible rematch down the road so that an asterisk will not remain next to this sandbagger. The next piece of evidence and thing I'd like to bring up and defend myself on is I was not at the Cheesecake Factory dinner. I had no knowledge of this thing.

Bugsy's not here. Bugsy's got pain and suffering. Bugsy's in concussion protocol still from the sandbagger. He'll not be able to be here to testify to that. I want to add into this now. I submit Exhibit B, Your Honor, Witt's illegal putt on No. 7th green. It's on video. He also comments on this video. G, if you want to run the video. Witt has a hard putt on number seventh green uh it's on video uh he also comments on this video g if you

want to run the video wit has a hard putt it's a downhill downwind right now so his is going if he i know but he's good like he knows how to do it but he's i think they're like a little too anxious i think he's forgetting about the wind oh what does that count what is that where's the camera you don't nothing when you don't mean to? Nothing when you don't mean to. What? Nothing when you don't mean to? It looked like you mean to. You hit it with your club. Oh, I didn't mean to kill that guy. I just had a gun on me. It wasn't my fault.

Oh, please. Nice outfit. It doesn't count if I didn't mean to. Now, if you look at that video, you can see clearly I'm completely confused. If it didn't mean to, I make a really great comment like I didn't mean to kill that guy. And we could list several things that you never mean to do. Objection. OK. It was made clear after the United States Open in which Dustin Johnson won at Oakmont Country Club, which ironically enough

is in Pittsburgh, close to your fucking house and your family where they sleep Armstrong. Ironically enough, Dustin Johnson, he hit a putt. He went to hit a putt and he was practicing before he was going to hit his putt and he hit the ball by accident and they waited and the rules officials came over. And in the end, they actually charged Dustin Johnson later on with a one stroke penalty. So I believe instead of winning the United States open by three or two, he won by two or one. But it was such a ridiculous moment in the history of golf that later on after that season, the United States Golf Association made a rule that if you do not mean to hit your putt, but hit the ball with your putter in a practice putt, it made a rule that if you do not mean to hit your putt but hit the ball with your

putter in a practice putt it is a rule the stroke does not count the ball goes exactly back to where you're putting and you get to put it no penalty so that right there is me describing the rules of golf via the usga and shutting your entire point up i rest my case in this uh little argument okay i don't uh and and your honor you'll get the rest my case in this little argument. Okay, I don't. And your honor, you'll get the point of this. You'll see how they swindle and kind of, you know, by telling the exact rules of the United States Governors Association for an elite golfer

that obviously has some kind of leeway and knows someone in the PGA. And they kind of let him off the hook because he's like a hero, an American hero. Okay, that's great. We're talking about the sandbagger. We're talking about totally different situations, lining up his pot, hit it, reset it, made up an excuse that doesn't. He could have said that on the thing.

He could have said, OK, Oakmont 1925 when I'm saying it now because I didn't think you wouldn't believe me. I thought you knew I was a man of honor. But if you're going to call out that, I actually made up the the rule that i'm gonna put your ass in a bucket body bag describing the usg rule let's go baby sorry your honor it's okay so i have a doctor's note i have this on video a total thing of of them making up on a stroke as we know they are playing they'll do anything to win we hear it on video several times we're here to win we're here to win we'll do anything to win we hear it on video several times we're here to win we're here to win we'll do anything to win you think we're fucking around they say it several times on the video these guys are unethical scumbags uh and don't get me started also before i finish up your

honor on biz's handicap which has been the same for the last 15 years oh Oh, my God. Also, another incorrect. Biz, do it. Thank you, Your Honor. What do you say? No, my handicap was an 18. It's now moved down to a 14. Thank you. The only time, Your Honor, can I kind of give my spiel here? Now it's the defendant's turn to bring in some evidence and witnesses,

if you have them. Well, I mean, I wouldn't call what he had evidence, a fake doctor's note to a guy who was in fact the actual bully and the one initiating everything on the golf course. Can we roll the tape? Can we roll the tape? Objection. Can we roll the tape?

Biz, what's up with you, bro? You want to fucking hit me? You want to get me going? You want to fucking get me going, bitch? You want to fucking get me going? You fucking... you fucking. He doesn't have his tie down on him. What an idiot.

Get the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here. Oh, my God. Yes. Yes. Yes. This is set the tone alone. Oh, my God.

Jiu-Jitsu. Get in your cornhole, Bugsy. Get in your cornhole. Get in your cornhole. Look at Bugsy. He's doing pretzel. Oh, he's going to break your neck. He's going to break your neck.

Oh, my God. He's got a pretzel hold. Oh, my God. Bugsy's cut. Bugsy's cut. I'm choking him. Bugsy's cut. He's gonna break your neck! He's gonna break your neck! He's got a pretzel hold! Oh my god! Bugs he's cut! I'm choking him! Get out of here! Holy shit he's cut! That was a harm. Watch your wrist.

Who's our trainer? We got blood! He's trying to see if Buzz is asleep! Did you put him to sleep? Hey Buzz you made him bleed, though. He's bleeding, bud. Hey, that's such set the tone alone. We got to change the pace of the game. You want to go me, bitch?

You want to go me, bitch? You want to start something, bitch? You want to start something? Antagonizing, antagonizing Bugsy. Bringing Bugsy in. Bringing Bugsy in. Bugsy's the chillest guy. There's a video out there. Chillest golf guy on the course so chill bugsy's super chill laughing i was anxiety

army one more time biz go ahead you're being rudely interrupted no shit no shit order order in the court so go so your honor merles um my handicap went down from an 18 to a 14. I don't get strokes on the par threes. Now, if anybody wants to call me a sandbagger, they're out of their fucking mind. Given the fact the only time I get rounds in is when we have sandbaggers. So we can go months or weeks before rounds. I don't practice. I don't have a swing coach.

The first swing coach I ever had was the guy who kobe armstrong brought on the golf course that day who taught me a little something called tempo and that's why i play it on my mind so thank you very much kobe armstrong for shout out to perry shout out to perry shout out to perry for delivering that victory uh going back to the bugsy malone stuff okay i can understand where the confusion was because the rules were not established off the hop for anybody listening including myself i don't even do the intros to the sandbagger because they're extremely difficult because not only do you have to remember who you're playing against their nicknames what their handicaps are where you're playing who you're

going to thank you the sponsors and then of course as i mentioned establishing these new rules that we decided to do because Grinelli, it was actually Grinelli's idea. We originally started on the Aposo one in Molson with adding the kid element. So we thought, hey, I think the fans like these different rule elements because they add something different. So we tried it, okay?

So as Witt is doing the intro, Bugsy Malone, being the antagonizer that he is is rubbing the back of wit's head with the putter wit for about three or four moments of contact i was battling i was fighting it he was fighting through it trying to remember everything and guess what i believe he did mention one of the rules but one of them the redo shots was left out of it hey we get it we understand it but as you can see in the video we joke about not reminding them of it but we do because they are the ones who call the first redo they call it on me when i nailed a 40 fucking footer that was the biggest slider in sandbagger history that i fucking drilled and these idiots scumbags called the redo and we still won the

whole why wit because I two-putted and you guys all you had to do was two-putt and and and like there's just for Bugsy and you army to call it the scam bagger to say you didn't know the rules and then on video show the clip this is so good That is so fucking good. 3-2? 3-2, sit. Sit. 3-2! That's what I'm fucking talking about!

Are you fucking kidding me? Suck on that, bitch! Suck on that, baby! Your new fucking rule. They're calling the redo. Bugsy, great call. Called the redo. You're not getting a redo.

You don't think I could fucking do it again? Biz, we just need to two-putt. Biz, we just need to two-putt. You don't think I could do it again biz. We just need to to pot Hey shut the fuck up Shut the fuck up Merle's he's gonna regret making you redo this biz fucking literally Bugsy you knew the rules the rules because I didn't get the chance to say it in the intro because he was flicking my ear and sticking his club head up my cornhole I forgot to do that but when you're at lunch with somebody and then you go to the same goddamn restaurant for dinner and you talk about the rules over and

over and over and over and then forget for the viewers at home i understand the viewers being upset armstrong and malone knew the rules they started the original redo they then got bit in the ass by the redo because bugsy's an absolute loser and i'll say this this fucking handicap is as legitimate as it gets we have, I think maybe 15 or 16 sandbaggers film now in three years. He's played 15 rounds of golf in three years. He does not touch a club when he does not play a sandbagger and he still is playing four shots less. And also with handicaps, I'm a very, very savvy handicap person because of all the golf I play. People don't understand your handicap is basically

average of your best scores, okay? So Biz really should still be an 18. He had one really good round, and it happened to be in Pittsburgh against Armstrong and Malone, and the whole world's up in arms about it. The next one comes out, you won't be bitching about a 14 handicap being business handicap. He is the most legit 14 handicap in golf history, maybe. So this is...

Thank you for adding that. And I just want to touch on the Bugsy Malone injury report, okay? Not only was he antagonizing Witt off the top, so it added a little bit of fire early on because it upset us because we had to redo the intro and take focus focus off of our round okay he initiated after they got down early what happened after that in two instances when i was about the tee off he kicked the ball off of my tee trying to spark it up trying to spark it up trying to spark it that doesn't happen ever by accident oh your honor your honor your honor your honor if you want to

watch i call it biz one time as he's walking up i go watch this he's gonna kick the ball off that's not an accident and then and then so finally i got fed up i said maybe i need to take matters into my own hands being the the aggressor on our team. That's what I do, right? Witt brings the A game. So I bring the C game, but I got to bring the physicality, the fourth line energy. So we get in a scrap and he puts me in one of his judo holes. Jiu-jitsu, actually. Your honor, he doesn't even know this.

It's jiu-jitsu. Jiu-jitsu holds, which Witt mentioned in the video, that should be illegal. And he should, in in fact be in prison for that because when you have that type of training you can't be starting fights in public and even if you want to do say i want to say i started the fight that's fine but to to call me the antagonizer antagonizer and all this is absolute bullshit i will down the road have a a rematch if they want potentially and it's up to my partner here but to put an asterisk on this victory is absolute bullshit i won't even do another sandbagger um if i have to put my foot

down in order to fight for our right well your honor your honor can i speak your honor can i speak your honor how much time are they going to speak plaintiff this is what we do the plaintiff order order order we had to debunk all your bullshit we're gonna put the defendants in contempt it's the plaintiff's turn well first of all i'd like to say that bugsy is not in prison thankfully he's in concussion protocol and he's having major anguish and suffering from the uh public uh you know you know your fans are just coming after him. And he made one. He stood up and he was brave.

And Bugsy's braveness, he comes forward and challenges the, you know, weight of the sandbagger and all that you guys provide with, you know, your great fans and your big deal brew and the pink Whitney drinking fans that just support you guys and come out in droves and bugs. He has to deal with the scrutiny of all of this on his shoulders. Obviously he's taking it extremely hard. And I just want to put what you guys said as exhibit C I'd like to submit it.

Your honor, the opening, the opening at beautiful Swickley Heights golf club, the opening that they tried to, you know, scam their way through again. Amber Heard had a better defense. You going to let him add that in? I mean, he's from the peanut gallery with that one. I would like to say that the opening, this was their 14th sandbagger. This is like nothing for them.

This is a cakewalk. And here they want to act like buddies of theirs over years and years and years of being friends would distract and mess up their sponsorship ad reads to a golf course with a couple numbers for handicap. I would like to submit the opening. Our fans are confused. Your fans are confused your fans are confused the viewers don't lie i uh i wasn't at the fake cheesecake factory meeting where uh the rule

was made up apparently and uh they use that to destroy the integrity of this titanic matchup that the fans wanted to see the comments are real they didn't like the redo rule it wasn't read at the start of the match very well in the opening and and this is where we're standing all right can i speak that sounded like the plaintiff's closing remarks so i'll go to mr whitney for the defendants closing remarks they sounded very contradictory in the fact that they were the victims based on the comments in the chat. And now all of a sudden, you're the victim. You're actually the victims in the chat. So, so I'd like to ask the plaintiff something army.

What did you guys think the redo rule was considering you started and you used it first? I don't understand. What did you guys think it was? You called it out first. Bugsy did. Bugsy made the call out 100%. Brilliant call out considering the rules.

We didn't know after when you chipped in on eight, no, seven, after the Bugsy suffered a concussion. Oh, weird. You chipped in and we didn't challenge because we didn't know all the double challenge things for whatever the thing is. I still don't know what the rule is. That's my answer. Whit.

Thank you. Okay. I'd like to call a witness as is in my final remarks. Sure. Okay. I'd like to call Mike Grinnell to the stand. Oh, Mike Grinnell.

Can gentlemen, can you put your, put your hand on the Bible? You swear the whole truth and nothing but the truth. So help you, God. I do. I have two questions, sir. First, is it true you have very, very skinny, undersized wrists?

That is true. OK, I just wanted to get that out of the way. Good. My other question is, did you did you do you remember when the rules were read to both of these two one take back per each person? Do you remember that, sir? Ryan, I actually remember it being done multiple times, once on the driving range. And then once again, I was also at the cheesecake dinner and I did hear the rules being said to Bugsy's face. I did hear that. But most important, that hasn't been mentioned. The rules were explained on the driving range.

I heard it. Thank you so much, Mike Cornell. Thank you very much, Mike. Can I cross examine? I will. Nope. I will finish. This is my closing remarks.

Witness, you don't get to talk to him. I will finish off by saying this. Viewers at home, I'd like to say I apologize for having a tailor-made golf club sticking up my asshole from Ryan Malone. And I forgot to mention the take back redo rules to you correctly. I apologize for you viewers. But these two men, these two scumbags, these two idiots who played against us and lost to us fair and square, they knew the rules. Rest my case, Your Honor.

Plaintiff, I'll give you one more chance since your partner didn't show up. What the hell is this? Yeah, this is actually the this is actually called fair fairness you guys you guys ever heard of that fairness okay i don't get to cross-examinate a guy that is there on your behalf absolutely twisted on pink whitney nips the entire time with a camera. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And he's under pressure from you goons that lean on him and overwork him and destroy his confidence and shatter his wrist size and, and, you know, demasculate this guy.

Got more residual pussy because of this podcast than anybody on the planet. So fuck off with us. We are dominating this kangaroo court. The USGA ruling just crushed him on the planet. So fuck off with us. We are dominating this kangaroo court. The USGA ruling just crushed him off the hop. They make him live in a rat infested apartment in New York City to run. He's fucking living in a penthouse now, baby.

Order to the court plaintiff cross examine. Keep it on the rails here. Cross examine eight. Your honor. I ask that you see the unethical do anything to win antics of this sandbagger and award myself and bugsy malone a rematch hashtag pray for bugsy arrest my case your honor i'd rather be locked in prison than have to go through this 25 minute conversation of this fucking nonsense from this birdman goon over here so if you got to throw me away and never do another

sandbagger do it as long as i don't objection your honor name calling name calling okay okay gentlemen i'm gonna retire to my chambers i'm gonna soak up all this evidence and i will be back shortly with a verdict don't get too drunk in your chambers oh yeah pink whitney nips all over the place just getting absolutely crippled they're like your honor your honor here he comes here he comes here he comes okay okay this one didn't take long i re-watched the sandbagger this morning before the before the proceedings the rules were talked about throughout the throughout the the match there was plenty of time for the plaintiffs to understand that um failure from one of the plaintiffs does not show up in my courtroom is just total disrespect for the court um the plaintiffs i don't believe you've shown a reasonable doubt that

the rules were not known to you i think that there was enough time out there you guys could have used the rules and i don't think it really affected the play. The sandbaggers are better than you guys, but I will agree that next time the rule should be written down in paper or done on camera. So I'm ordering the defendant, Paul Biznasty Bissonette, to send a case of Big Deal Brew to the plaintiffs and defendant Whitney to send one case of Pink Whitney to the defendants or to the plaintiffs for their suffering and pain. But that being said, I rule in favor of the Spittin' Chicklets crew. Biz Nasty, the wit. That's a winning match.

That's five in a row for the Spittin' Chicklets. We beat him on the course and we beat him in the courtroom. We got brains. We got brawn. We got absolutely everything, Biz Nasty. Yeah, you know, we got a case of Big Deal Brew and some Pink Whitney coming our way. Thank you, Your Honor.

Thank you. I'm glad that we can put it to the test for the people under fair judgment. That's all we ask here at Chicklets. You know, anything involved with Chicklets, the people wanted, there was some confusion. I think you guys would admit, I'm glad we took it to a kangaroo court. This is what has been done in the hockey dressing room for hundreds of years.

Hundreds of years, you're able to stand up and speak up and challenge against anything you don't like. And we just gave it to you right here, right now. This is exactly how we do it in the room. just gave it to you right here right now this is exactly how we do it in the room uh obviously the judge would be a lot more sober uh in this situation in this usual situation than absolutely bamboozled like uh you know your honor but the bills lost hey hey hey content hey with that's a long way of saying he's got a new nickname army amber heard arm dog oh my god that's so true that's so true i love it thank you guys for that i'm sorry bugsy couldn't make it and couldn't track him down honestly uh wish bugsy was here

all right people that brings the end of kangaroo core i ruled in favor of biz and wit they are five times in a row champions of the sandbagger. But let's move on from that. Let's talk some real hockey here, Army. Well, yes, absolutely. Let's get to these guys. Well, we got them. Huge week.

Another chicklets has dropped. Biz was hot and heavy on TNT last night, which will bring us to our check the game notes, bud, section, which we have a shirt on the bar stool store you can go find that and buy it if you didn't buy it for 20 off over the thanksgiving weekend which was an absolute beast of a sale a beast a beast do we have numbers on that g do we know yet have they calculated all the day data let's just say we sold a shit ton shit ton of stuff there you go that's actually that's actually

science right there we have scientific data that says shit ton um and also we at the start off the top a new name um we might have a kangaroo court over this comment as well because uh i think wit came up with chiclets etc cue the snap show and uh anyway he's got he's got there is absolutely zero chance one i would ever be involved with naming the show and two if i was pick chicklets etc i knew it was gonna bug you that's why i said it it worked perfectly good uh and so we've come up with the new name which you've seen in the comments i said it it worked perfectly good uh and so we've come up with the new name which you've seen in the comments i know biz pushed for mindsies uh chiclets mindsies uh but it will be chiclets game notes boys congratulations this is episode one of chiclets game notes

episode two of i don't know what you call that what Merle's, what do you call it? The Army and Merle's. Army and Merle's Gong Show. So it's kind of weird. So it's like a, it's kind of a weird one, two thing that we did. One, two, two, one, one, two, one, two, two, one. But here we go. Check the game notes. Great guests this month, boys.

Unbelievable energy stories we got. The sheriff was electric energy with a great story and and i hope that you guys follow up and i'm part of it we can go to watch him play in that crazy quebec league i know you guys talked about that go up there i'm going up to the quebec peewee tournament with merles you guys very familiar with that turn i want it my son's gonna be there merles lost in the final finals yep i'll give you some shout out for that thank you um but we just want to look through some of the stuff and and you posted a video the other day which i thought was absolutely amazing of you on the dolphin ride um i got to ride a dolphin i don't think i had a double taxi squad pushing me um but how are the arches holding up on that thing i know you got into it

your feet are like gnarled up like probably an old uh tree from forrest gump movie that he sits with jenny and what was that like for you in that experience with your family and your kids and did you did were the kids involved like i know they're smaller but yeah rider was very uh very scared to get in the water and then he's like i don't want to get in i'm like come on buddy you like it turns out he had the best day, which made it very fun considering it was his birthday. But in true fashion, I kind of had to make it about myself. And and I went for it. I mean, I didn't know that the dolphins would be coming up from behind you.

Now, what's scary is you're facing where you're going to end up being pushed towards. But it's almost like you can't see these dolphins. And there was all these different sections of people doing different things. So there was probably 16 dolphins in this giant cove we were in, dolphin cove. And so when I'm looking towards my wife and my son, who I'm going to be like riding this dolphin, like, you know, I can't even really describe who I look like because I thought it was so original how tall I was. But I'm facing looking and you don't you can't see them coming so you don't know when they're going to hit your feet they swarm behind you right yes they swim underneath me and then turned around and then boom and somehow they time it exactly the same because I was worried about my right knee getting

it first and then like my knee possibly hitting me in the face but boom they timed it perfectly and the arches aren't great the arches have been great. But to have a dolphin nose stuffed in your arch, it's absolute horror. But I battled through it to lock my legs up. And I wish I was able to hold the balance a little bit longer. But I also, in the back of my mind, thought maybe these dolphins have lost their mind. They're going to push me into the rocks, into the cliffs. So I was getting ready to jump off the dolphins' noses. But in the end, an amazing experience.

I almost wanted to go back and do it the next day. It was like 180 bucks. Now you're, you receive some criticism as I did. Cause we're both pale individuals, super pale. You have the pink Whitney trunks on, which made me think about a fake baking as they call it tanning. What's your guys' take on possibly fake baking as a player tanning. I've hit the tanning bed when I was a player.

You're in season. Sometimes just get a little bit of sun on your skin right you got to have the sun with i don't see you as a fake bake guy with the little goggles wheeling in there i tried doing it prior times in my life i remember i was in college it was always never mid-season though it was about maybe like going out or going on a trip but i just i i go from red to white i get burnt to a crisp i look like a complete idiot like a fire hydrant like a strawberry like a pink whitney bottle and then it doesn't even turn tan for one goddamn day i go right back to being pale and ugly so i'm not with tanning tanning's horrific for your skin and horrific for your body if anything spray tan but that didn't work too well for me either.

I think most chicklets listeners know that story. Yeah, we used to do the tanning in college and you only get a week off in college. It comes after you lose out and our coach would lose his mind because we would be showing up a week or two before the end of the season and he could start seeing that we're already planning for our spring break trip. So he'd be furious that eight or nine guys are already tanning before the ECAC finals, but we would drive the 24 hours straight to Panama city.

And you do not want to waste any time worried about tanning or getting too much sun. So we always prepared before those spring break trips and the coach wasn't happy, but what are you going to do? That's where you first met ra right panama city yeah he was still down there on college spring break he looks exactly the same age as he does right now did you guys uh did you guys remember the the reporter in wilkes-barre who was like tan mom we used to tan tan too much? No, no. I remember that. Oh, yeah, okay. There was a guy there.

And so we were going. Funny you mentioned March break or spring break, whatever you called it, Merle's. So I was going back home. And fuck, you're going back home. You're playing pro hockey. So I wanted to have a nice tan going back because you go for a couple party nights before you settle down with the family and hang out.

So I went for like 15 minutes in the bed and i hadn't been tanning so by the time the game ended i was fucking red and that reporter was in the locker room i remember jeff tape was on the team and he was just laying into me post game calling me the reporter's name and the reporter was in the room uh asking questions after the win and the fucking boys were just absolutely howling so that's that's the one thing that i thought of uh when you mentioned the tan situation but yeah it's so it's so bad for you to have the lines on your back so i've never done spray tan but have you done the lotion have you done the lotion biz uh in the basket no no but but i was on the skin

but i would definitely hop in hop in the bed from time to time and also it would help me clear up my acne a little bit too yeah that's the thing right that's the big one i would get the worst back me i'd get fucking zappers the size of a quarter hey i get a funny um just zappers are the worst on the back luckily i've pretty been lucky i've kind of been lucky for that but um ned havern and brian yandel they finished uh college the same year um or i don't know how it worked out but ned havern and brian yandel hadn't seen each other in a long time and chicklets listeners know both those guys and they ended up being together at the end of the ahl season with lol the lol lo Monsters, whatever their names

are. I don't even know if they still have a team. Does Lowell still have an AHL team? I don't even think they do. They do not, no. So they haven't seen each other in a while, and Ned's in the shower, and Yandel walks in. He's like, Bri, what's going on? And Bri's just like,

what up, dude? Gives him a whack on the back, and then just goes, oh, Jesus Christ, Ned, what's going on with And Bri's just like, what up, dude? Gives him a whack on the back and then just goes, oh, Jesus Christ, Ned. What's going on with your back? He had bombs everywhere. It's like your buddy right in front of everyone else just shrivels you. So I always get a kick out of like, if I see somebody with back knee, I'm not going to give it to him the way Yandel just tore down Ned quickly after seeing him.

Just a couple of goiters. Oh, yeah. Just a blood pool. Just a pocket on the back oh yeah just a blood pool just a pocket on the back just a massive blood pool zoider um wit i gotta ask you i've been in jamaica before um did you get the classic line like hey do you like bob marley and then you're like yeah obviously right because bob marley's probably playing a non-stop down there i guess right um i assume uh we've been controlling the aux cord in the house we have last night i actually had bob marley on i have been putting on all different

type of music though now let me the way of life here is unbelievable it's so crazy everyone is so relaxed i mean granted they could be super high all of them just uber relaxed and and just to think like the fastest men and women in the world for years and years are from this like chill island it's it's a great place though i'm really happy i even two days i'm starting to get sad do you like to party like bob marley but wait to to to allude to that point about the sprinters there was uh like a piece that just came out and actually the most effective fastest ones on the planet would run at the, it's called the 85% rule because you're more relaxed at that state. So they actually train, uh, everything they do is at 85%, but it's more about controlled

breathing. You don't go till failure. You do it at 85% for a certain amount of reps. And that is what, uh, in fact makes people the fastest people in the world so maybe that's why they have the advantage maybe the the the indica and sativa hitting it before training so they're in that perfect state is why they do it i had we get this caddy here this guy's named gas he's so funny he's walking around all day long, rolling joints and crushing red stripes. And then I'm like,

gas, where you like this putt, man? He goes, in the hole, man. I go, gas, how far is it? It's a 150 shot, man. Come on, you put it in the hole, we put it in, we go to the next hole. Everything's 150. Everything's 150. I'm like, it looks 240,

it's like 150, man. Great people down here, though. Remind reminds me of the time hotel army is gonna bring him to fucking kangaroo court yeah i gotta get a guy like that a zen master caddy in for me next time maybe that's a difference maker too which you guys did have a caddy also i didn't bring that up oops the court's done the court is done the only time i run 100% Merle's is when my ass cheeks are clenching. I got to run through shitter. That's 100% full flex sprint. The fastest man you've ever seen. Totally leg locked.

Rip into the. Somehow your body knows the closer you get to the toilet. It's like, how does the body know I'm almost there? But you're hanging on for dear life with that clenched ass, straight leg and run. Just a turtle head ripping out ever shit your pants you ever shit your pants army no not not in a long time buddy not since i was little a few close calls though a few close calls hey boys i remember i went to i went to jamaica though that was a story with bugs and balloon and he was like uh all-star break and it was like the guy dropped us off at a hotel in a golf cart

he's like you like bob marley man and i'm like yeah yeah sure it's my first time there i'm like see-through white glowing during the middle of the season he's like you like to pop party like bob marley i'm like uh i don't know and he like cracks out this ziploc bag of weed like a giant bag of weed i was like uh what what's going on here i had no clue what was going on i saw bugsy down by the pool later i told the story he's like yeah i bought it i bought that thing merle you look like a type of guy who shits his pants like once a year um the one time a funny time i did it was in vegas and uh i was on a heater at the craps table and so no pun intended you know you know if you're hot on craps there's no better feeling in the world and you do not change a thing you have superstitions going knocking on wood

tapping your head spinning around you keep it going and i it was a sacrifice i made when the roll ended i went in you you do the drop off you know just clean up drop the pants off and go on your go on your way how many how many people do you think at a casino Merle's to your story as a hardcore, you know, got the routines down, run the heater. You never leave when you're on a heater. Well, that's diapers. Don't remember last year during the live stream, we were talking about our eight, the slot machines,

wearing a diaper handle came on and said something like that. But that I wanted to bring up RA because that's I mean, he's my guy, but it's my favorite part of this segment when you can make fun of some of his takes. And I know it's been a while, but the Elon Musk that he's he can beat him in jeopardy or that he's smarter, smarter, just just outrageous. Is this is this a real thing like you guys have hung out with him more. I've only seen him talk. That is 100% real.

No, but is it real that he's smarter, in your opinion? I know you guys haven't met Elon Musk, but just like. Do I think Rear Admiral is smarter than Elon Musk? Like this claim? I know. He does have a fancy way of tricking people. I think that he's like really. The one thing I'll say is he that he's like really like one thing i'll

say is he he says he's really good at trivia and he does say about the jeopardy thing any give it's like any given sunday it's like you know you get the right board you get the right questions i guess anybody could beat anyone but if vegas did jeopardy odds and ra was playing elon musk elon's minus 800 and RA is like plus 650. He's a hockey podcast host. Going against the smartest man in the world. Let's put it this way.

He's a self-proclaimed journalist. I don't know how much digging he's ever done for one story other than getting a scoop via DM. You know what? RA. And you know what? Ari, a couple of comments. I got one thing that I loved.

And Biz, maybe you can do it. The Jesper Brat call. Jesper Brat. Yes. And that's how you're supposed to do it. That's the great way to do it. I think we could all maybe do it. Merles, can you do it?

Jesper Brat. No, that was very. It's got to be Jesper Brat. Swedish. They don't pronounce so bad merles like i get in trouble because i can't say my wife's name correctly her name's johanna and i don't say it right it's okay it's okay but on the first episode of talk he he went into the jesper bratt um area and if you want to play it for us g yes but brats and that was it and it's you know how he does like

the throat thing and he's trying he can't quite get there and he's just working the throat it's like he tried to do it and i for whatever reason it caught my ear as like an ra you know doing is doing trying to fit in do the thing and it just like i was just like oh my god we got to clip that off because we could boom boom just keep hammering he could even do it close biz and i picked that out right away i love that that was a moment for me for for ra and another one with ra too that when he when he went you mentioned about journalism right full journalism ra, RA. He comes in with a question on Kyle Conner, which I saw he tweeted, like, huge chicklets bump coming for Kyle Conner. And he had an assist the game after that interview.

He roasted him on his goal-scoring ability that he's a playmaker now. And I almost sent out a post, Kyle Conner retires after this interview because you guys are just no so what happened what happened army is sometimes we store the interviews and i think that we interviewed him in the next game he had a hat trick oh is that when it really happened yeah and i i knew you guys were interviewing him so i did a score bet prop connor to score winnipeg to

win because i knew that there was a backdoor chicklets bump and boom he had the hat trick they won going away oh my god everybody in ontario cashed in so the joke's on me then the joke's on me you're you're just like that court case we did yeah stay hot army stay three you're both you're fucking having a wit night in Russia right now. Sweden. Vladimir's going to put two bullets in the back of his head. Sweden. I couldn't keep the fuck out of my neck. Any beauty takeaways from this month, boys, though?

Since we only get up once a month, I mean, this month on your shows. No, but I love the reaction. I got to say, Andre Waugh, awesome. I can't believe it was the first time you guys had him on as well. And I know playing with him and he's got stories for days he could go on and on one of the funniest guys i ever played with and i thought he really really brought it and um that san jose story wit was electric okay like i because i can picture it so clearly going on the ice and i remember like the step was this big

during that story when he was like we're sending the penguins you know that's big step as you step down in san jose yeah it's not like the normal boards it's like it's like two and a half bigger and guys were like coming out laughing and falling down needless to say we did lose the game and it wasn't it wasn't great but was he kept it loose every day uh he was he was unbelievable on there he was great and and i've said before sometimes you know guys personally and how funny they are but it just doesn't always translate like podcast start. And guys are different in terms of storytelling. And like, maybe they feel a little pressure being on a pod.

So I didn't know if he'd still be like as funny as he always wasn't to me. And it was it was it was even better. I mean, he did not stop. It was put a quarter in him. I love the story about fighting the goalie after he chirped him during the shootout and then that turning into a bench clearing brawl in one of the minor leagues he was in that was great and yeah he was funny i had a lot of people comment that was just a great lesson and and now because he was that funny it's like all right we got to do more with

him so we're going to try to do something on camera with him get a little more content with the big guy all right and then i won game seven because cookie in my ass. Yep. That's right. I always remember was he always wanted to be on the power play army. I don't know why they don't see it. I got the best. Every fighter wants to be on the power play. He had a great shot. I scored goals, Matt. I scored 15 goals in junior. I can score.

Yeah. He always had, he had like a huge slap shot. He's like, I don't get it army. Why they don't put me on five on three was he fucking he used to do the goal and so um okay moving on now from that i just wanted to mention if you asked about the last month november uh second second best november for the toronto maple leafs uh since the oh here we go oh Oh, Jesus. Leafs talk. No Leafs talk. Jesus. Guys, come on. It's a quick comment. Second best November since World War II for the Toronto Maple Leafs. The only better one was last season. And since Witt opened up his mouth about Mitch Marner, 18.

Oh, my God. 18 game point streak. You're welcome. You're welcome. Tied for the Leafs record with, I think, Sittler and Eddie Olchek. That's right. Keep in mind, no overtime back then. I think when Olchek was mentioning that he was playing.

So pretty impressive that he was able to go 18 in a row. But best right winger in the game right now, baby. Tricky Mitchie. I would pay money. He's one of those guys in the league that you would pay money to go watch right like you're not hitting up you're like walking in like hey i'm biz nasty have you guys uh tickets when he when he tied the record he came to the locker room have you ever got the water bottle bukkake from the boys i called it the water bottle bukkake on the air last night still waiting for a phone call we were tnt like the last sometimes the show moves so quickly in the beginning because you have to

get in all these sponsor things like end of the show you get to like go off the rails and that's like in there all night on the last 30 minutes i just fuck i don't give a fuck i'm like looking to get cancer this is a pp whack time for you you think biz you think you're gonna this is uh no no i don't i think i'm good i think it flew on me hey hey army before these guys get going i want to get to our quarter mark of the season awards and and biz this is where you can talk about some of your leafs maybe if you got some of these guys winning one of these awards so So why don't you get us started here, army? Well, okay. The Norris trophy boys at this time of the year,

I think we all agree. Maybe not. I don't know. I got Carlson probably for his production right now and his resurgence since Brent Burns left. And now he can be the lone horse stallion running through the field with electric hair and a true hanging out of his mouth. Just absolutely lighting league on fire.

The suite is back. He's producing. He looks looks happy their team stinks but he's producing and he's having one of those ek 65 seasons that we've seen in the past and been passed i mean many many years ago any objections to that guys like i think he's kind of the standout he's a runaway norris i think go ahead maris oh no i got I got there's a little stat. I wanted to bring it up last episode and I was going to say a different guy could win it. But the last 10 Norris trophies have been won by 10 different players.

That's a very interesting stat. So Eric Carson has already won a Norris trophy. So he's out. I got Josh Morrissey now. Josh Morrissey. Yes. Give him some love. Correct. He's been dominating. The Jets are a sneaky team. And he's a guy that fits under the new player of the last 10 years.

Shout out Prince Albert Raiders. And I believe, did he go Kelowna Rockets at the end? I think he got traded. Shout out Western League. Best league in the world. Josh Morrissey. I like that. Actually, Merrill's really good.

Yeah, no, I think that's like a great other option. Like he said, I think he might even be still leading his team and scoring Winnipeg. I just think that the stats are so dominant for Carlson early on. But I do feel like those will level off. Now, it brought up an interesting discussion for defensemen on the broadcast last night, and it was defensemen under 24. Who would you want to have?

People were complaining though, that Noah Dobson wasn't on the list. Now this is a guy I have not watched much of. Yeah, I know. He's with the Islanders. A bunch of people chimed in that this kid was left off the board and they were pissed. The other names were Jake Sanderson. They had a skin in from Dallas. They had a skin in from Dallas. They had this is a wheelhouse question.

Darlene Moritz cider. And there was maybe one other guy that was on that list. Now, if you were starting a franchise right now, you can't McCarr and Fox, I believe are 24 a piece. Which one of those guys would you pick right now if you were building a team first of a defenseman under 24 who you would want? Would you want Jake Sanderson, Noah Dobson,

Marit Seider, Haskinen, or Darlene? That's a really good question. I'll turn it over to wit the the genius defenseman legend i picked doleen just based on what he's done so far this year it seems like i think doleen has like so much further to go i feel like i feel like he's really good but like i think like he could still like go way higher like i don't know why when i watch him i just feel like there's more there even i think in uh 15 years marie cider's gonna have two of them yeah if not you got absolutely welded with a shot last night by the way so i'll

say this wit it's it's their team still is a little bit thin on the back end and obviously they signed that ben charot in order to play with him i don't want sophomore slump isn't the word it's just all of a sudden now he is getting every top line matchup so I don't think he's producing as much offensively as he was last year so this year is going to be a massive learning curve and the fact that he's got to take all these heavy minutes I'm really interested to see how the second half of the season goes but as time moves on I definitely think that he will be that horse that you're describing where he is that Chris Pronger. I love him.

Modern-day Chris Pronger type where he's fucking hammering guys. He's playing with an edge. He's maybe fighting in some cases, but yet still able to be that PP1 option. So I just wanted to bring the D-man conversation a little bit longer because I think that we all mostly have Carlson at the top for the Norris. Yeah. I want to go to the goaltenders next, the Vezna.

I think that's, you know, a pretty important position. We see the goalie carousel boys. What are we looking at right now? I'll give you my pick. Excuse me. I'm looking at right now. I got a Hellebuck is for me. And I think at the end, he's going to stand the test of time

with that sneaky Jets team. And he's going to have a beast of a year. connor hellebuck watch out jets you got josh morrissey just absolutely working for his first norris and then you've got hellebuck in there who's been there at the top and been in the conversation at the top for many years hellebuck's having a great year i mean witt's gonna probably go sorokin because he's oh my god well i actually it's funny i think the bruins are so good that allmark isn't getting the credit he Buck's having a great year. I mean, Whit's got to probably go Sorokin. Cause he's, Oh my God. Well, I actually, it's funny. I think the Bruins are so good that all Mark isn't getting the credit.

He deserves. He's leading the league and save percentage and goals against. Do you think we don't give him credit? Cause he's like, he's not like the pedigree of all these other guys. Is that why? He shares the net too. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. But he's been way better than, than Swayman and whoever else was in there when Swayman was hurt, but all Mark's been great, but still, to me, you look at the roster and how good Boston is, so people don't give him the credit. Sorokin and Hellebuck are number one and two.

You could flip-flop them any way you want to do it. But I said before the season, I'm not trying to be that guy. Sorokin is a world-class talent. In the end, he'll be a better goalie than Shostakhin. He's bigger. He's stronger. He's going to be able to continue to play at this level where Shostakhin, last year, legendary. All-time year.

But look at this season. It's been rough. And I think Sorokin has proven that this is exactly what people saw when they were coming over from the KHL. And he outplayed him over there, too. Yeah, he won the championships. Yeah, you were better than sorry, Merrill's Elia better than Igor shirts on the barstool

store. Let's check that out. Yeah, I gave I gave Sorokin in our preseason. I have it in paper and my blogs, but I watched him. He was in CSKA and like Whit says, he won the championships over there when Igor didn't will run the tape at the end of the year. Islanders have a better defensive team, so he's just going to get better chance to do better.

And I'm on the Hellebuck train. All Mark's a great answer. I'm going to go Homer status, and people aren't going to be shocked. How do you feel if you're the Washington Capitals? The second and third goalie in the league right now in save percentage are guys that you gave up on to go side Darcy Kemper, which I love Kemper. I mean, he deserved it.

He won a Stanley Cup. He got paid five times five. But second and third are Samsonov, and then is it Vanacek or Vaticek? How do you say his last name? Vanacek. Yeah. Let's get to the heart, Biz.

Biz, who's your heart pick already? I got one more after this that we'll do, and then we'll move on. I'm saying McDavid because he's on a different planet. Yeah, I'm McDavid. Don't overthink it. But I think what, based on analytics, expected goals for, blah, blah, blah, like Jason Robertson is not far behind. And he's also not, he's also not playing 26 minutes a night.

Like I watched McDusty and Drysaddle last night. They're playing 26, 27 every night. Do you think that because they're like way better than like they have a, they need to because their team isn't as good, which is funny. They were hanging on by a thread with the Chicago Blackhawks. They got the lead for one and then they fucking gave it up, so the coach had to keep throwing them. That's even more the heart.

That's why I'm right with McDavid. Right, but I was just going to say, what Jason Robertson is doing right now and where he's brought his game, it's fun to watch. So fucking fast. His ability to shoot the puck with speed is just as good as anybody in the league and he's got that stand-up skating stride where even though he has the speed he's always got

his head up scanning the ice so he's able to make these plays so he in my opinion if they challenge if they continue what they're doing and so does he he, he has to be challenging McDavid for it. It's crazy to say, man, this guy's fucking in his third full year right now and just absolutely dominant. He's got better expected goals. I ain't going to go too deep in the analytics, but he's my guy right now, right behind McDus. Stats are for losers, Biz, but whatever.

Exactly. I'm on Robertson too, and And I just they're a surprise team. They're going to do better. They're going to finish higher in the standings. He's second and even strength points in the whole league. You guys know who number one is. Eighty seven. Eighty seven.

And, you know, this Robertson's not just picking up cookies on the power play and losses. He's getting important points. Dallas is looking good. Biz, you want to, or Witt, you want to get in on that? I actually, I like Robertson right now just because he doesn't have the right side of the way

McDavid does as MVP. But I love mentioning Crosby. I think he'll be right there. And I think you can't sleep on Pasternak. He's been outstanding. He's been the best Bruin, best he's ever looked for me. And the Bruins are the best team

in the league. So keep his eye as the stats continue to pile up towards the end of the season it's going to be a great race for MVP boys I gotta run I gotta run you need any more picks for me rookie of the year quick one rookie of the year and and coach of the year quick coach of the year no brainers Lindy Roth moronic devil fans just looking foolish foolish foolish but when I'm wanting them fired after one game rookie of the year massachusetts own seattle's maddie benears that's a game-changing player he could skate like the wind um unfortunately played at michigan i'm not a big michigan fan uh

but a hell of a season he's having and as you guys know you crushing this podcast game so i love you guys i'll talk to you later. I love you, buddy. Go hit them good, man. Go hit them good, man. See you, man. Yeah, man. Great job, Whit. Love you, brother.

Boys, I think that the coach of the year is probably the tightest race of them all. I'm not even necessarily ready to hand it over to Lindy Ruff. Oh, my gosh. And you push for Lindy Ruff's apology. I know that. Listen, listen might be ahead by a minuscule amount, but this is the tightest race going right now because you have Haxtell and what he's done with the Seattle Kraken.

I'll give him that. Monty. Monty. Fuck, they haven't lost at home yet. Given the strength of their roster and the superstars they do have, I think that, what's his name, Cassidy in Vegas is probably outside looking in. But going right back to Dallas, like, Pete DeBoer, how many times can you go to a different team and sprinkle his magic

and all of a sudden they're having more success? So, to me, right now, I'll probably have Sheldon Keefe. Bro, they got an AHL D squad, and they're fucking ripping off. I think they're playing better with the AHL D squad. They just had the best November, or second best November, and they're playing with an AHL back end. They didn't have their goalies either in Toronto. So I think you got to look at,

didn't make this all comes in, didn't make biggest points, you know, jump, which will be New Jersey. Probably Vegas didn't make the playoffs last year. So, you know,

Cassidy's right there. I think rough Cassidy and Monty. Yeah. That's a Monty. It'll be the top three just because, and I could see Haxtell sneaking in at number four there with big conversation depending how they ripped down the stretch I'm glad we got it all on tape with that though Monty's your guy though yeah he's my guy but he

does have a lot more like established like weapons but you know they weren't supposed to do this well they were supposed to struggle a little bit but he does have the better lineup when you're looking at teams like Seattle or New Jersey when you're comparing them so i could see him not getting it but if he wins the stanley cup he's going to be happier than the jack adams absolutely and biz i want to keep you i know you got a i think you're traveling today but i want to get you like two more segments if we could and i know you love these ones i want to get to the next one which is beer league heroes and i'm sure we'll see a smile come on your face as you think of the greatest league in the world where it doesn't matter how good you are we all end up in this league the beer league where everyone comes together and it's all

everyone loves hockey and you just do it you get off the couch 11 o'clock at night and you get in there merles we got nailed on social media comments you've got a great story that was sent in it's so cool biz you got to hear this yeah i think this was our our best segment we got the most feedback from it and the one story came from taiwan this guy joshua smith told me about it he was kind of defensive because of the whole shower the shower rule thing shower sheriff he's a lady boy and um so they don't they play in a rink that didn't have showers. So he said, but we don't do showers. But what I tell you, we do is every time we go across the street to the seven 11 and seven 11s there have beer taps.

So the whole crew goes over there. They crush a bunch of beers. He admitted they're all still a little stinky because they don't shower. But he wanted us to know that at least they're drinking their beer after, which leads us right into rule number two of the beer leagues army. Yeah, no, absolutely. And shout out to everyone out there playing. I mean, this is this podcast and this brand of spin chicklets worldwide, Taiwan, they're sending in beer league pictures.

Hey army, they got to get the truck bed with the blue tarp. You should see the picture. The picture is actually really great of these guys at a 7-Eleven all gathered around for a group pic. Like Connor McDavid's hot tub, just the beer league version. The beer league version, yeah, the back of a pickup truck with a tarp in the back with beers. Quick soak after the game.

Quick soak, loosen up the legs. By the way, I thought that was hilarious on TNT last night. They showed you in the hot tub with McDavid. And who else was in there with you? I forget who else was in there. I forget who it was. They put someone else's head in there. It was actually brilliant and hilarious.

But the first thing I thought of was hot tub time machine. Remember that movie? The Chernobyl, the energy drink that spills on the computer. I got a great story, too, which i kind of should have said last episode but this guy's story rang a bell so when i played in japan there was a team in china so you would go down to china for a week and you'd get all three of your games against them out of the way in one week so the first day we go to this place it was brutal so we get in the locker room and all right where do you where do you go where do you piss or you know where do you take a shit guys like in there so we look me and the other in pork we look in and it's just a shower in this big hole in the middle of the floor

and we're like no there's no toilet in there man he goes no you shit right in the hole and you just piss in the hole so this shower is just one shower head and then a hole in the floor where you shit piss in in the locker room so so we go out on the ice, we practice. This rink is disgusting. Like people are smoking in there to smoke filled up. We come off the ice. Obviously we were one of the first ones off the ice. We go in the shower, no cold, no hot water, only cold water. So it was just a disgrace. So that's insane. Oh, it was nuts. So after this,

the coach said, bring everything you need, except your equipment back to the hotel. And we're going to just get dressed in your hotel rooms, like the locker room. So we showed up in like our getch and, and like taped up your ankles. And then we showed up just in time for the game to put your equipment on. That's at the play off.

It was, it was hilarious. Normal. Is that like a normal? No, this was only in China. Oh, yeah. In China.

You'll see it in Russia. Yeah, you'll see it in Russia, too, just the holes in the ground. So, Merle, did you not play in Japan, or were you in China the whole time? No, so this league was Asian Hockey League. We had four teams in Japan, three in South Korea, one in China, and one in uh far east of russia so you got to see it all it was that was your that was your like ehl experience when i went

to uh to cardiff so you day i want to hear more of these crazy stories that you experienced i would imagine that it was a pretty big culture shock but we don't need to get into it now but i'm sorry that you had to endure the the poopy hole yeah oh yeah that's unbelievable that that was that like a like the rink you guys played at like is that the best rink they had that's no i mean that was their team would travel around which they end up telling us is they would do like two months in one city then two months in beijing then two months in shanghai me being the the mush that i am of course i I ended up in like the crappy city of the three. You come home with all the knockoff suits from there.

It was great. Okay. Rule number two, which is I want you to hear. I call this guy the variety pack swindler, the variety pack swindler. I don't know who this guy is. I heard this story a number of years ago. And every day at beer league, right?

You have jobs and every day someone Beer League, right, you have jobs. And every day someone will be assigned to bring the beer. And sometimes the same guy, sometimes it rotates. Well, this guy, the Variety Pack Swindler, he took a beer from everybody's night that they brought a beer. Every Tuesday, let's say they play. One guy would bring a beer. He took beers from that one, took beers from another, kept them in his bag. Took beers from that one, took beers from another, kept them in his bag.

And then when it was his turn time to do the beer, he, he, he opened his bag and he had this massive hot variety pack from all the things. Not only is he cheap, that's a brutal move. And you never do the variety pack swindler. If you're that guy, get off, you're kicked off the team. It's a complete joke. You got to have them on ice. You got to buy them. As a matter of fact, big deal brew is the beer you got to get. And I think that's agreeable. And how do you feel about this, boys?

Just the cheapness and the creativity of people to get around having to buy beers for your team, which is the one sacred thing after the game that you do. It's completely unacceptable with this guy. Kind of obsessed with the variety pack swindler such a biz move that is such a biz move yes get in on this i love that genius that is genius have you seen that at all now do you play beer league i've i've never imagined someone would do that but just the now i could understand why it would happen in Canada because of how expensive booze is in Canada. So for you Americans, I want to say a pack of big deal brew in the States is in some places, I want to say $9.99 and other places $11.99. I want to say in Canada, it's at least an extra four or five bucks for a 12 pack.

Maybe even a little bit. Probably more, maybe 10, 10, 15 bucks. So it just tends to get a little bit crazy. Same with the pink Whitney. And unfortunately we don't, we don't control the prices, but the fact that this guy more than likely in Canada. It's a Canada. It was Canada. It's the weight of it. Was he keeping them in his bag the whole time? Apparently, the guy kept them in his bag. So when he cranked them out on his night, he's like, here you go, boys.

It's all like a shit mix. There's skate marks all over it. Some of them have been cut open because, you know, he's not covering up his fucking skate blades. There's rust on them. Actually, you know what? He might be the guy who puts the sock over. Oh, there's rust on him. Actually, you know what?

He might be the guy who puts the sock over his skate blade to protect the fact that he doesn't cut one of the beer cans. I 1,000% am the guy that puts his socks over his skate blades. That is me. G looks like the guy that wears his socks upside down and tapes them like bell-bottom over his skates, the tops down. I use laces as tape during beer league oh my god that's a bad look this is the stop army we gotta we gotta clean these leagues up we gotta get pictures of this this is our job hey fuck you this is what makes these leagues great

like this is what's driving conversation ingenuity the the beer bag the beer variety pack guy i want get send him some big deal brewers he's got a sponsorship yeah let's get i want to find out who this guy is that's right spitting chicklets to find out the story of this guy that i got told i don't know his name biz but you're right this is unbelievable biz the first sign endorsement by big deal brewing is the beer swindler i want to see what he looks like hey instead of a twinder twinder what is it called tinder tinder swindler yeah tinder swindler the beer league swindler the variety pack swindler that's what he is netflix documentary about him yeah there is

there is some preposterous shit going down in mensley League. We're cleaning it up. We're cleaning it up. Murr's cleaning it up. He's dedicated. I'm dirtying it up. Rule number two, bring enough beer for everybody. You can always take it home. There's nothing worse than sitting there and you ran out of beer. Bring it up. Anybody, anybody listening?

Send me your the worst gear where send me the worst fucking stories and i will send you big deal brewing because i want this theme of people being obnoxious at the beer league skates fuck what these guys are saying we're not cleaning shit up this these are the real entertaining leagues it's probably more entertaining than the national hockey league with personnel yeah oh yeah the characters man my best thing to see when i play beer league or if I ever see it is the dude that's out there. And, of course, they're not buying new gear. The gear is just, like, dated. It's ancient.

They don't care. It's just, you know, they show up. But the guy that has now packed on a few LBs and those hockey pants don't quite fit like they used to. And they're, like, literally like Kneelander, like Willie Kneelander tight pants on them. I love those guys. Those guys are my favorite to the point where they have to breaking inside up breaking news, breaking news.

I just got a text, uh, 34 Austin Matthews. We'll be signing an extension with the Toronto Maple Leafs today. Wow. What? You heard it here first folks. This is unbelievable breaking news right here.

Gee, how fast can we get this thing turned around to get it out there? It's probably already. Is it let me let me text them and say if it's OK to report check notes first on the scene. No, no notes. Rumor boys.

Rumor boys. Strike again. Let's go. Let's go. Let me ask to see if I can say if I can even tweet it out. I should put Austin Matthews. I should get him painted on top of this eagle behind me flying into the sunset into that Leafs logo. I have right over here.

There you go. Leafs nation. The five-year deal was maybe a perfect move. And then they get them on a year where they say he's kind of struggling, right? Like he's not, he's kind of struggling right like he's not he's still putting up good good numbers it's not like goal a game like we're used to seeing but i mean what a signing the five-year deal uh his agent will be happy you know that you know i was i thought he was going i thought he was going to be going i was always giving biz a hard time that

he was going to go to la or you know but wow that's unbelievable breaking news biz thank you thank you very professional reporting rumor boys nailed it rocked it that's so good for chicklets game notes thank you biz for that the insider the insider that we don't deserve biz nasty i think we should speculate what do you i haven't been told this what do you guys think he's going to sign for? What do you think it could be there? This is going to be nuts. I would say another five years.

13 and a half? 14. I think he's getting at least 14. At least. Wow. With the cap jumping up, the cap's going up, boys, too, so this contract probably won't kick in until the next one's done. So it's like, Hey, Hey, false alarm.

It's, it's, it's, it's an endorsement deal, not an extension. Rumor boys. This is unbelievable. We got this moment. We got this swindler moment. Hey, how many people who were listening went to their phones to tweet it, to check the airways to see what he signed for? Check the game notes, Biz.

Right there, bud. Holy smokes. What there, bud. Holy smokes. What a great Biz Nass. This is like in the Sandbagger. You're right. I put it on the green. Damn right. Rumor, boys.

Anyway, boys, I think that's it. Oh, my God. I'm glad you stuck around for that. I'm glad we had that moment, Biz. Unbelievable. Great job on TNT. Great month by Spittin' Chicklets. You and the boys continue to bring it.

Great guests, great content. Always good stuff and great announcements. Quickly, before you leave, though, I know we announced what we talked about off the top of the show. The Boston show, Biz, sold out in six minutes i believe um which wasn't as fast as pittsburgh but it's a bigger uh state um theater from what i understand faster than pittsburgh it was two minutes quicker than pittsburgh oh we did eight minutes in pittsburgh we did eight minutes in pittsburgh six minutes in boston we're getting in and faster. And Boston's a much bigger theater, too.

Yeah, way bigger theater. Yep, correct. So you can see the power of spitting chiclets in the Boston area around this event, which will be unbelievable. Looking forward to that, I'm sure. Right, Biz? Six minutes. One minute more than the number we have in wins in a row in Sandbagger. Suck on that.

You son of a bitch. And yeah, our live show announcements are going to need roman swipes because they ain't been lasting very long and we we did keep some tickets on hold for friends and family um we don't know we haven't gotten all the numbers yet but if you didn't get the chance to get a ticket there may be a few extra that come on sale here but to the 800 or 850 so odd people that did get one uh we're really looking forward to this we're very excited we're going to keep this thing going and uh looking forward to having some more special guests come out so keep kicking ass boys i had a blast

army um probably the worst kangaroo court defense or plaintiff case i've ever seen in my life, but thanks for coming out and we love you guys. And I kept my streak alive. Exactly. Uh, Merle's great job. Love you guys. And a shout out to all the beer guys out there, the beer swindlers.

We love you. There he is. Hey, sell them out of the, sell them out of the back of your trunk next time to all the leftovers. There he is. Business nasty. Looking for sponsorship deals for big deal brew for all you beer league legends out there he is business nasty looking for sponsorship deals

for big deal brew for all you beer league legends out there get those pictures in for him thank you for joining biz all right boys that was it thank you for coming on biz and wit and settling this issue of the kangaroo court was absolutely electric i thought that was very professional murr great job you had fun with gavel you had a gavel you still you had the cape hey you know this is i got a swedish law book here that's where i got my degree from if anyone's questioning how i became a judge yeah that's good you want to see the swedish law book that's always good to have i want to see the size of this thing yeah i want to see that that's what he. Yeah, I want to see that. That's what he studied. Saviridja's leg. Saviridja's leg. If anyone's questioning my verdict, take it up with them.

Well, I don't think I've ever won a kangaroo court, so. Nobody has. The streak continues. But awesome for those guys to come. Biz, obviously, on TNT last night, dominating again. Hilarious. Great points. Great interviewing ability also,

as he redeemed himself with Stevie Y. And another good one with Leon Dreisaitl. I loved it. And of course, Biz, our wit's still in Jamaica. Thanks for them for joining us. Tough schedules. Gee, you keep these guys running around like rats in New York City. They're just busy as hell.

But before we get to the end of the show, we obviously have to get to the Barstool Sportsbook EBR section of the show, which is always huge. People stick around for this. People set their clocks to this. Anytime Merle's tweets or sends anything out, the stats are through the roof. Stats are for losers, but we keep track of those stats.

Murr, where are we going with this right now in the Barstool Sportsbook? Maybe do you want to recap last month what we did? Yeah, I want you to pump up my tires about the EBR play of the month. You were right. If anyone remembers, it was Ferry Estead in an unreal way to win it. We had a win in regulation. They were down a goal with 10 minutes to go. They tied it up.

And then with two minutes left, they got a penalty shot. And the guy scored on it. Everybody cashed tickets. Everybody went nuts. But also our armor pick the armor, the collab, the collab pick also hit. We had sharks over and that thing. I think that thing cashed in the first two periods it was just not not even a question so we will be back again and i got another game of the month it's

from sweden but we also have our armor pick the armor pick game of the month from sweden merles you are crushing sweden you're constantly putting out the greatest content ever it's like my backdrop uh i love the backdrop. Look good for another show here. We got a new name and now we've got some new picks. Barstool Sportsbook, EBR, Mr. EBR himself, the content machine, Matt Murley. What do you got for us moving forward here? All right.

So first off, the EBR game of the month is going to be Saturday at noon. Your time, noon Eastern, 6 p.m. here in Sweden. It is Shaleftia. Shafdia is a great team north even more of me they are unreal team so shalafdia saturday take a money line take them three-way line take them puck line any which way shalafdia three-way and then our armor play is sunday night so we'll take the winnings from Saturday, move them on to Sunday. Can I say this though? We won our last armor.

Of course we did the Anaheim San Jose over when they were playing each other. They played each other like a few days before we did the last show. And it was like 10 goal game. It was even more the next night we crushed it. So we're sticking with that theme. Merle's I love it for the armor pick, which game are we doing again?

And what is it? It's over again. We're doing over. And I meanle's I love it for the armor pick, which game are we doing again? And what is it? It's over again. We're doing over. And I mean, this team played a huge over last night, Detroit. It's going to be Detroit at Columbus over six and a half. And one of the main reasons we liked this,

there will be boots on the ground from the chicklets crew. G will be there. Biz will be there. There'll be dummy and big deal brews if we need rally beer. So we're going to have, we're going to have boots on the ground to help us get there. So Detroit, Columbus, Sunday night, over six and a half. I love that. I love boots on the ground.

GGs, you guys are doing what's going on. We got bottle signings. We got bar star appearances. What's going on with the boys over this? Just before we move on to the big. Is this your play of the month? Sorry, Murr, that we just did with Shalafia. Shalafia, yes.

That's the one. OK. All right. So we are going to Philly Thursday and Friday, Thursday night. We're going to be at the Flyers game and be dishing out some big deal brews throughout the concourse. That'll be a blast. Friday, we're doing a quick meet and greet at from five to seven p.m.

at Fine Wine and Good Spirits in Philadelphia. That'll be awesome as well. Saturday, we head to Detroit, heading over to Little Caesars Arena, doing a little meet and greet at the Tin Roof beforehand. That'll be amazing. And then Sunday, we're heading to Columbus, our bar, crushing our bar before the game, going to pound the Big Deal Brews. And then Tuesday, we're heading to Newark, the Presidential Center, as Biz likes to call it. American Whiskey beforehand. The Brat Pack's going to be there.

It's going to be a blast. That's going to be electric, actually, that you guys are going in there really at the end because there's been kind of a hornet's nest stirred up with New Jersey and the fans and Biz and Spittin' Chicklets. So I think it's going to be great. And all, stay tuned. I'm sure with boots on the ground, Merle's will have a play for that game later on in the week when you guys are there right also mer probably ebr is just

electric going to keep and keep an eye on those guys when those guys are around good things always happen we we win every bet when we're on these trips together and i i'm it's hurting me not to be on this detroit one as i am the red wings guy of the podcast but i think we're going to be able to make a trip there in the playoffs the way they're playing so i think i saw mr right at some point he's kind of pissed at you the other day i think he he was pissed about some bet with detroit and he kind of was going crazy on you ripping his shirt off and calling you out about your boys the detroit red wings so detroit obviously that's your team some great picks from ebr uh we got the armor play. Stay tuned for that. That's on the Sunday game, the Columbus game. We go the over on that one.

And that's, is that it? That's pretty much it. The Shalephtia bet, 12 noon on Saturday. Mr. EBR himself was calling it right now. That's why you come here. That's why you come for this content. That's why you come for the pick. I want to thank G for getting this all together,

coordinating it all with everybody um travel schedules everything that we have merles enjoy christmas uh while you've got it before you come back stateside yeah i'm gonna be stateside in a couple weeks which is huge i don't have to be staying up till five in the morning watching these nhl games anymore i'll be able to to really hone in and live bet and and i i will i'm only probably an hour and a half drive from the new jersey border to sneak down and put in the barstool sportsbook bet so look for me to do that maybe get down in new york before to cg or or whatever and uh but if not i'll see you guys in boston that's for sure yep that's the next time we'll be seeing you

g busy all month of december bar star appearances other things stay tuned watch spit and chiclets for that we thank you episode two in the books what an episode kangaroo court uh we we figured out a lot of issues with the sandbagger gave you some bets gave you some picks a great new uh beer league story uh and a new name obviously let's game notes baby chiclets game notes, baby. Chiklitz game notes. Thank you, everyone. Have a great month. We'll see you at the live show. We'll see you in Boston.