Start With A Win - Communication, Preparation, and Energy-Management in Sports and Life

Episode Date: June 9, 2021

In this episode of Start With A Win, we hear from Molly Fletcher, a speaker, author, and former top sports agent. In her professional career, she spent two decades as one of the world’s only female sports agents and negotiated over 500 million dollars of contracts. Molly shares a bit about her career, including key points she has learned over the years of negotiating contracts and working with people. She notes that negotiation is simply a conversation, and the better the relationship, the better the outcome will be. Understanding where the other person is coming from is vital, as are good preparation and communication.On the other hand, Molly lists two of the top mistakes people make in negotiating: not asking the tough questions early on and not taking the time to pause. To wrap up, we learn about the idea behind Molly’s new book, “The Energy Clock” — that the linchpin for performance for athletes, coaches, and business people alike is not time management but energy management. Show up for your big moments with the energy you need! Connect with Molly:https://Mollyfletcher.com   https://Training.mollyfletcher.comDiscount code: WINConnect with Adam:https://www.startwithawin.com/ https://www.facebook.com/REMAXAdamContoshttps://twitter.com/REMAXAdamContos https://www.instagram.com/REMAXadamcontos/ Leave us a voicemail:888-581-4430

Every day is filled with choices. You're here because you're choosing to start with a win. Get ready to be inspired, learn something new, and connect with the win nation. Coming to you from Denver, Colorado, home of Remax World Headquarters. It's Adam Cotto, CEO here with Start With A Win. Looking across the virtual studio today, I see producer Mark. How are you doing, buddy? So good. I love it. I love it. How long have you been saying that? I mean, we've been here since like- Yeah, going on three years. Yeah. I want to get a shirt that says so good. It sticks, right? That's right.

Awesome. Well, hey, Mark, we have a really, really fun guest today. Molly Fletcher. I mean, we've had her at a REMAX event. She is awesome. She's a speaker, author, former top sports agent. So get this. Molly spent two decades as one of the world's only female sports agent. So get this, Molly spent two decades as one of the world's only female sports agent.

She's hailed as the female Jerry Maguire by CNN as she recruited and represented hundreds of sports biggest names. I mean, talk about somebody who's seen behind the curtain in professional sports and really high performers. So she's negotiated over $500 million in contracts, built lasting relationships with these people and observed and adopted these traits. You know what? The cool part is she shares these ideas with all of us. She's a popular keynote speaker, a podcaster. Like I said, we've had her at our events.

She's that good because we only bring in the best, okay? So I want to welcome to the show Molly Fletcher. How are you doing, Molly? I'm doing awesome, Adam. Thanks for having me. Yes, I loved that keynote. I remember how fun and engaged everybody was. It was special. Awesome. Yeah, it was really, well, the stuff that you talk about, we're a business of entrepreneurs, just a big giant network

of entrepreneurs. And they are people who really are super high performers. They outproduce their competitors two to one, and they love to get better. They go that one more mentality, go the extra mile, focus on what you're good at and make it work. So I mean, we've got a lot of cool things to talk about because you have a new book out, The Energy Clock. I'm really looking forward to that. And you also have another one, Fearless at Work. Both of those, I mean, if you combine the two of those things, you're unstoppable, aren't you? Well, what I'm blessed to have has been around some pretty unstoppable people, and I try to bottle all that up and redistribute in a way that helps others. Awesome. Well, why don't you tell us about that background? You're a top sports agent,

20 years of doing this. Give us a little bit of background on yourself. Sure. So I was a student athlete at Michigan State, played tennis, and then I wanted to get in the sports marketing space. But you know, I grew up in East Lansing. And so I tell this story when I speak and I, you know, I saved a little bit of money, moved down to Atlanta to try to get into the sports space and, you know, negotiated this deal to teach tennis at this apartment complex for free rent, which gave me a little bit of bandwidth to get into the sports space where you make no money out of the gates. Right. And then, and then navigated my way into an opportunity where I began to see that if we were going to grow the agency, we needed to go get more talent, right. We couldn't just rely on referral business, if you will. And so I began to kind of get more

aggressive there and started recruiting baseball players and, and, and, you know, long story short, you know, so we started with four or five athletes and coaches and, you know, long story short, you know, we started with four or five athletes and coaches. And, you know, 18 years later, we had about 300 athletes, coaches, broadcasters in that space. So it was a wonderful journey. And then I started writing books and speaking and we do training and all that kind of stuff now. That's awesome. Well, you mentioned your first negotiation of getting an apartment, you know, with the tennis piece there. I mean, you had to have learned a lot of lessons about negotiating in your time as a sports agent. Give us some of the key points that you learned. Sure. Well, you know, as I think about your

listeners, right, as I think about what they wake up and do every day and navigating those conversations, you know, I mean, I think one of the biggest things that I found was so important is that a lot of times we go to negotiate, whether it's big or small deals, is we spend a lot of time thinking about what we want, right? What would success be on our side of the table for our party, for the family we're representing, for the people that we're serving? But I think it's equally, if not more important to get inside the head and the heart of the people that you're negotiating with. And I tell a lot of stories about whether it was general managers or sports manufacturing companies and leaders. I tried to spend a lot of time going, what are they worried about? What are they excited about? What's working

for them? What's not working? Because that's, at the end of the day, negotiation's just a conversation, right? It's a difficult conversation at times, but it's just a conversation. And so the more we can connect, I have found the better the conversation. And so the more we can connect, I have found the better the outcome. And so a lot of times people think, oh, sports agent, right, you got on the other side of the table, took the gloves off and went at each other. And you know, the truth is, I found that the better the relationship, the better the outcome. And in fact, the better the relationship, the quicker I could close the deal. So I'm a big fan of quality relationships, great preparation inside of those, great communication and great connection. And then you can close better deals and you can close them more quickly.

So you, well, it's interesting because we all think about negotiations of, okay, you get this number, I get this number. How do we, how do we both become equally unhappy with the results here and, and end up in the middle of some place. But you kind of took this out into this relationship piece. Yeah. How do you, how did you work the emotional aspect of the relationships into that negotiation? Because it sounds like you got these people to like what you were delivering to them and vice versa. I mean, that's kind of contrary to what everybody, you know, people think of going and buying a car or buying a house or whatever with negotiating, but you made a lasting relationship there. How did that work?

I think we, absolutely. I mean, and I, and I found that the better the relationship because we, in our business, I mean, we had, you know, there's 30 big league teams. I mean, if you get sideways with, with a general manager and you have another player coming up, that doesn't help that second player and that third player, right? If you get sideways with a golf manufacturer and athletic director and you got to go back in there for another athlete or coach, I always found for me to truly serve every single one of our clients, I had to keep those relationships in place, not just for the best outcome for the existing player, but for the future, you know, too. So, you know, to me, relationships are the thread. And, you know, one of the things that we

teach in our negotiation training is that's counterintuitive, right? But is that we want to add value to the people that we're negotiating with. We want to make their world better. And I tell that story about my sort of fun tennis story. But the more that we can add value, get inside of their world and deliver value, I mean, you know, sort of that power of reciprocity, it's really, really powerful. And we think, well, who in the world would at some level add value to the people that they're trying to do a deal with? But when we, and it can be big, it can be little, it can be not expensive, it can be expensive. But can be not expensive, it can be expensive. But when we do that, it is human nature to want to find a way to give something back inside of that dynamic, right? So we teach that, right? The other thing I think, you know, tactically,

that's incredibly important is, you know, there's lots of moments when I was negotiating contracts for my athletes and somebody didn't think they were worth what we were asking for. And I love my clients. And that was hard. And it's hard to hear. No different than somebody who's trying to sell a house that's really proud of what it is. And we can get defensive in those moments. And what I found consistently is the more curious we can get inside of those moments versus defensive,

the more we can shift to trying to better understand the why behind their position, the more it gives us an opportunity, again, to connect and to build that relationship. And, you know, again, the stronger the connection I found, the better the outcome. Now, it also, though, doesn't mean, Adam, right, that there aren't moments that we have to walk away, right? You never want to agree to a bad deal. And so, but you can still be intentional about how do I sustain this relationship and walk away? Because the last thing I want to do is get locked into having to serve or execute against a bad deal, right? We have to have the courage to walk away too. So powerful. Great points there. I love the, the reciprocity. That's a huge factor of influence there and so powerful here. And it's

interesting you bring up, there's only so many sports teams out there. So you're playing in a very, very small space where every relationship does matter. And what if everybody operated their business that way where they're like, hey, I'm going to run into this person again. How do I treat them with dignity and kindness in order for us to be able to do business in the future? And I'm sure that didn't happen for some people, you know, in, in negotiating. It doesn't sound like you were one of those people, but I'm sure there were mistakes made during negotiation by some people as well. Do you, do you have any lessons of, I mean, maybe you didn't make them, but you saw them made and you came in and cleaned them up perhaps or something like that.

But what are some of the top mistakes people make in negotiating? Yeah, and I certainly made plenty, Adam. I would say, you know, I mean, I think there's a couple. One is not asking the tough questions early on in the journey, right? I think sometimes we don't want to ask the question because maybe we don't want the answer. We're afraid it might implode the deal, right? We're afraid that it'll cause friction. We're afraid it's too difficult of a question. We're afraid of all those things. But the truth is, if you park it over to the side, it's not gone. It's still there.

And in fact, it may just get worse. And you may spend more time and energy on the relationship moving toward a close, but then that bomb will drop on drop on the 10, 10 yard line. Right. So I would say one of the biggest things is avoiding the tough questions. And, you know, there was lots of times when I was, um, you know, we did Billy Donovan's deal where he went to, um, from Florida to the Orlando magic and, you know, changed his mind after 12 hours and then had to unwind that deal. And, you know, had I maybe done, and we done a better job of asking some difficult questions to Billy along the way, we might've created some clarity and saved him from sort of that. And so those athletes that I recruited where, you know, they were already,

every client that we signed with the exception of a guy coming out in the draft or a kid coming out of high school or college, they already had an agent. So we were pulling them from another relationship. And so, you know, that was important to understand the relationship that they were in and was it good and was it working and was it in fact an opportunity or not? And was I running up the wrong flag? I mean, there's a lot of big league guys. There's 750 big league guys, right? If you're going after a guy that's good, there's 749 more. Go find them. So that would be one, is not asking the tough question. The other one I think that comes to mind is not pausing.

One of the chapters in the book that I wrote on negotiation is how important it is to pause inside of these moments. And I think know, I think about your audience, right, as they're negotiating deals and, you know, the courage to pause and a pause can be 30 seconds on the phone. It can be a day. It can be a week. It can be a month. It can be five. It can be whatever. But when we pause, we send a message potentially to that other agent that our client is firm, right? They're firm and they're not moving. And that can be powerful. So pausing is important. Two, I mean, those are great points. The, uh, I'll tell you what, I love the ask the hard questions one, because so many people, you know, they come in on behalf of their client. They're like, Hey, I'm going to represent my client. I don't want to upset my client. So they don't ask those hard questions, but that might

make your life so much easier to ask hard questions up front. So. Yeah. And it maybe potentially helps you manage expectations a little bit. I mean, you know, early in my career, I always wanted to sort of tell my clients the things that I felt like they wanted to hear to say yes. But the last thing we want to have to do then is service a relationship that is completely exhausting and unrealistic to execute against. And, you know, in the sports world, as in your world, you know, it is a bit of a bubble, I'm sure, for folks in various markets. And, you know, I believe all you have is your reputation. And I always wanted to make sure that any guy in any clubhouse of those 30 big league clubhouses only had good things to say. And I think when we're inside of a community and we're selling homes and that when people are at cocktail parties and events, that they only have good things to say about you.

It doesn't mean that you're not tough. It doesn't mean that you can't have tough conversations. It doesn't mean that you're not good at what you do, but it means that you enter and exit relationships in a, in a way that allows for other opportunities to potentially come out of that and other, and other great relationships. Ah, so true. And those are the things that people remember. That's what people are going to talk about when they're discussing your reputation in the marketplace. So, hey, Molly, let's move on to your latest book release, The Energy Clock. Can you give us a fly over of, I mean, what is The Energy Clock? What does that title mean? Well, I mean, you know, what it really comes down to is within 20 years in the sports space, what I saw the linchpin for performance being with athletes and coaches was energy management,

not time. And then I sort of wrote these books and then I transferred into the business world more, the traditional business world. And I found business people sort of borderline obsession with their calendars. And I thought, wow, you know, and so what that looked like in a microscope for me was, I mean, I remember sitting with like Matt Kuchar, a PGA Tour player of mine, and, you know, going through his tournament schedule. And none of these guys are going to play 32 weeks in a row, right? They play two on, one off, three on, one off. But the goal is, how do I peak at the Masters? How do I peak at the US Open? How do I peak at the majors and not just grind and then show up to the Masters half dead because I'm completely exhausted.

And then I get into the business world where people load their calendars and then they show up to the sales pitch, to the meeting, to the moment that matters the most, and they don't have the kind of energy they need to perform at their best. And so it was this very interesting kind of eye-opening where I thought, what if business people looked at their life through the lens of energy versus time? Because what happens is we're in an environment right now, and I know in the real estate space in particular, where the level of demand on people, on your agents, I would imagine, is exceeding their capacity. They're busier than ever. There's so much opportunity. They're drinking through a fire hose. I mean, it's great, right? But if we don't navigate the demand against the capacity effectively, and we show up for big moments without the kind of energy that we need, to me, it impacts performance directly. And I saw that with athletes. And so the book helps people

get clear on where their energy is going now, gets clear on the things that gives them energy, that drains their energy, helps them understand how they show up as their best selves. It helps them understand the things in their lives that are distracting them from performing as their best selves. And then it's a system that helps them set themselves up for success moving forward. Oh, my gosh. I'm going to go back and rewind this and listen to it again because this this is one of my, one of my favorite things to do is I have my calendar right here and I sit there and I'm changing things around, make sure that I'm absolutely focused and performing at my highest level for each of these meetings. And I'm getting rid of meetings because they're nothing but energy sucks, by the way, you know, it's, it's just a fantastic, fantastic concept. I'm going to encourage all the business

leaders out there, get a copy of the book for your assistant so they understand where stuff should not go on your calendar, for crying out loud. So this is really cool. You mentioned the word distractions, which it's this creepy thing in your life now that just really takes over, and I hate it. So why is it so important in your perspective or from your perspective to eliminate distractions in our work and our personal lives? Well, I mean, they're everywhere, right? I mean, there's two kind of, you know, there's external distractions and internal distractions and the external distractions are what everyone is dealing with, right? Whether it's, you know, technology or phones or, and we have to be intentional about navigating those. Otherwise we can't execute. And I've had so many incredible

people on my podcast that this is what they do. I mean, they focus on, you know, Cal Newport talks about deep work and calendar blocking, right? So that you can in fact lock in and focus. I mean, our brains are not wired, right? To go from starting an email, to taking a call, to cleaning out our inbox, to jumping onto a Zoom, I mean, to running out to show a house, to jumping in our car to respond to four emails, to picking our kids up from school. I mean, we're not wired like that. And so what that means is it impacts performance. And so there's all those external distractions. And we've dealt with more and more of them now inside of COVID in light of the fact that so many people are working from home and all the things that come with that. And then there's the internal distractions, right, Adam?

I mean, like when you think about our private voice. I mean, people talk to themselves in a way that is inconsistent with how would the greatest coach in the world talk to you? Why don't we talk to ourselves that way, Right? Like let's be our greatest coach because sometimes the things that we tell ourselves certainly don't serve us. And, and human beings, they believe the stories they tell themselves, right? Even though the story they tell themselves isn't taking them where they want to go. So, you know, I'm a big fan of saying, what are the two or three big gaps in our lives? What's the story we're telling ourselves around those gaps? And how do we rewrite that story to be one that serves us?

You know, I hear so many leaders say right now, for example, how in the world do I have time to work out? I mean, there's no way. I don't have time to work out. I mean, I got emails. I got calls. I got my kids. I got my husband wants this. I don't have time to work out.

What if the story was, you know what, for me to be my best self, I need to take 30 minutes a day and get my exercise in. Because if I do that, I have the kind of energy I need to serve my family, my clients, the people that I work with even better. It's just changing the story and then it changes what you in fact

put your energy against. I think I found my new best friend here, folks. This is awesome, Molly. It's like a business masterclass, a mini business masterclass going on to start with a win today. So Molly, you've, you've dropped so much value on us here. I'm going to encourage everybody, go play this one again and write down the notes because there are at least a half dozen key points here that I think are incredibly valuable. And go get Molly's book, The Energy Clock. Molly, where can we find you? I mean, you're an author, you're on social media, things like that. Where can we find you across the internet here to find the book as well as follow some of the things you're saying and doing? Sure, sure. You know, people can go to mollyfletcher.com,

and there's a bunch of stuff there. I think one of the things that your agents might be interested in, we have a platform where people can, it's one-to-many coaching, where I deliver on a particular topic every week, and they can go to training.mollyfletcher.com to check that out if it's something that we're interested in. I think my team set up a discount code for the REMAax folks. Oh, right on. Cool. All right. Well, we'll get that and make sure we put that in the comments of this podcast. And everybody,

remember, a coach is there to unlock your potential. And Molly has so many great ideas to help you do that. So make sure you go and check her out. Molly, I do have a question that we ask all of our guests on this show. And I know you're going to have an awesome answer because you've been dropping some serious value bombs today. Molly, how do you start your day with a win? How do I start my day with a win? Well, with a cup of coffee in hand and a little bit of just quiet time. You know, just a little bit of time to think about the people in my life that matter most. How do they need me to show up and support them today is, is, is what I try to do. So I think about all the people in my life that matter most.

And then I think about what is, what is going on in their head and in their heart and how can I best serve them today in a way that, that will help them be their best. Awesome. Molly Fletcher, speaker, author, amazing person. Make sure you check out her new book, The Energy Clock. And Molly, thank you for being on Start With A Win. Absolutely. It's a pleasure and an honor, Adam. Thanks for having me. Hey, and thank you for listening to Start With A Win. If you'd like to ask Adam a question or tell us your Start With A win story, give us a call and leave us a message at 888-581-4430. Don't forget to go onto iTunes and subscribe. If you love this content, write a review and rate the show. It helps us get the word out and reach more people. For more great content, head over to startwithawin.com. Follow Adam on YouTube,

Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter. twitter and remember start with a win