Start With A Win - Interview With Sue "Pinky Benson

Episode Date: November 30, 2018

Podcast Name: Start With A WinEpisode Name: Interview With Sue “Pinky” Benson.On this episode of Start With A Win, Adam Contos interviews Sue “Pinky” Benson. Sue, or “Pinky” as she’s known by, has had huge success as a RE/MAX agent and social media enthusiast. Sue encourages others to really getout there, create content, and own who they are. In this remarkable interview, Sue opens up about her son, Sawyer, and how grief can give you a new perspective on life. During the episode, they discuss how wins can come from failures. The show starts with Sue introducing herself and explaining how she is a mom, RE/MAX agent, and video enthusiast. The discussion segues into the fear that many people have being in front of the camera. Sue explains how people are judging you no matter if you are in front of a camera or not. You have to get out there and really own who you are. Sue opens up about the tragic loss of her son. She shares how that experience has affected her life in all areas. Recently, BombBomb has announced Sue as one of the Top Video Influencers. Sue describes how she got to this incredible place in life. She was able to learn the technology and start creating products that improved over time. She recommends using Facebook Live and Instagram stories as user-friendly platform tools. Her goal for 2019 is for more women to join her in creating videos without fear. Sue shares how she motivates herself at the beginning of each day. She suggests reading Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook: How to Tell Your Story in a Noisy Social World and Brave Enough. She closes with two of her favorite quotes and she advises listeners to own their stories. and sharewho you are with the rest of the world!Connect with Adam:https://www.startwithawin.com/https://www.facebook.com/adamcontosREMAXCEO/https://twitter.com/REMAXAdamContoshttps://www.instagram.com/REMAXadamcontos/Follow Sue on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sue-pinky-benson/Check out Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook: How to Tell Your Story in a Noisy Social World by Gary VaynerchukCheck out Brave Enough by Cheryl Strayed

At top of the 12th floor of the Remax World Headquarters, you're listening to Start With a Win with CEO Adam Kantos. Hello everybody, Adam Kantos here, top of the Remax Headquarters 12th floor, overlooking beautiful Denver. It's a clear day. And with me here today is producer Mark. How you doing, Mark? So good. How are you doing?

I'm doing amazing. We're, uh, we've got a pretty cool show today. I know. I'm excited about our guests. She is well known and she creates a lot of content, which I like people who create content. Yeah. Let's, uh, today we have an incredible guest with us who's not just an amazing marketer, amazing person. She's also an amazing Remax agent. We've got on the line with us Sue Pinky Benson from Naples, Florida. How are you doing, Sue? Hey, guys.

I'm so excited to be here. Thank you so much for the kind words. I love it. Wow, I feel so good. We're glad to have you here. And I mean, you've been on a lot of different, uh, you know, videos. I've seen you on stage talking to different events, things like that. So we've, uh, we've got a big name on with us

here, Mark. Yes. All right. So, so, uh, or a pinky, I should say, cause that's what you're known by as pinky. Hey, tell us a little bit about yourself. Okay. So, you know, I got to tell you, I can talk on videos and I can talk on stage, but the worst part for me is talking about myself. I'm not very good at it. All right. I know I'm not the best at it, but so let's see, I'm a mom and I'm a real estate agent and I live in Naples and I am a video enthusiast. So I love to help people learn how to do video. I love to do videos and I love my social media. And so those are about me. All thumbs up me.

All right. So let's let's break that down a little bit. You talk about video enthusiast videos, intimidating to a lot of people, isn't it? Oh, for sure. They get in front of the camera and every single fear that they've ever had is like what holds them back from getting in front of that camera. It's crazy. I don't know. I guess I should say I do know why, because I was incredibly fearful of that myself. And then you just, I guess the thing is you just got to do it, right? Yeah, you got to do it. You got to understand. And once you get your mental state there,

people are judging you regardless of whether or not you do the video. So, you know, if you, if you've got bad hair, you're overweight, the only person you're hiding from is yourself because you already have that, you know? So when you get in front of the camera, just own who you are. And then once you've settled on that, once you've realized that like, Hey, this is me and this is what I am, forget the judging, you know, you'll be fine, but it does. It's like one of those things you got to just get out there and start doing it and then work on what you can do to make it better. I love it. So just kind of own it, right? Own it. Yes. Just go after it. It's funny because at our convention, I know you grabbed me and you're like, Hey Adam, let's shoot a video. And I go, what? And then you turn it on and we

just started riffing. It was so much fun. And thanks for including me in that, by the way. Oh, those are my favorite things to do. I love to interview other people. I think that like everyone has a story to tell and, you know, just doing a little bit of research on someone and asking them some poignant questions can just make for such an amazing video. Oh, totally. Totally. So, hey, let's jump into the interview here. Usually we like to start with a win, you know, cause that's, that's how we like to live our day is starting with a win. But really, wins come from failures. In fact, I mean, you could say they come from not losses, but learns, but there are losses involved. Can you talk to us about a failure or loss that kind of has you motivated on a daily basis in your thought and your, you know, in your heart and why you do what you do? Sure. So for me, I think,

like you said, it's not a failure, but three and a half years ago, I lost my son, Sawyer, and he was just 21 months, just a little guy. And after going through this, because grief is an ongoing process, it's not something that just ends at the funeral. You know, I remember waking up in the beginning and being like, you know, why do I need to get out of bed? And I quickly learned that the reason that I wanted to get out of bed was the same reason that could keep me in that bed, which is I wanted to be able to get up and say, okay, I've done this for Sawyer today because I felt like, or I still feel like I have two lives to live, one for myself and one for him. And so that is my motivation. And everything that I do is that I want to share this life with him. And I want to talk about him. And by just doing videos, even though I'm not saying his name, it's a part of me. It's an extension of me that it motivated me to keep moving on. And so that's why the videos are so special to me is because of that. And, you know, I could have easily just quit. And then what happened after that was we made a decision that we wanted to change locations.

We were three hours north of Naples in a small town near Tampa. And actually, I was trying to get myself motivated, throwing myself into work. And I would go out and I'd go on listing appointments. And I'd sit down with my potential customer. And I would hear the words like, oh, we just heard your son passed away. And we didn't know whether you were full-time yet. And what had happened was other agents were going in and telling my story before I got there. And using it, I felt like as a tool to bring me down. And I come from a place of like, I just want to build the building together. I don't want to tear anybody else's building down. And that was really hard for me. I just, here I was a top producer in town and I was being judged

on that part of my story. And I thought, you know what? I think it's time. I think Sawyer wants us to have a new experience. So we relocated from Brooksville, Florida, down to Naples. I went from a place where there was like, you know, 400 agents to not being able to go out to dinner without dropping bread and some real estate agent picking it up. So it's been a crazy transition, but I think if I can say anything, grief gives you goggles and it gave me the ability to only focus on what I needed to focus on. And so every day that loss is my motivation to keep going. Yeah. So Sawyer, I mean, Sawyer gave you a voice and I mean, that's Sawyer's voice, I guess, huh? You know, it's, it's amazing. And I mean, first of all, it's such a tragic situation.

I couldn't imagine going through that. I know so many people do. It's so sad and unfortunate. It just touches your heart to hear somebody dealing with the loss of a child and dear sweet Sawyer at such a young age. It just, it's heartbreaking. But you're right, Pinky. I mean, just you're right, Pinky. I mean, you just, you, you gave that life,

you gave that, that unbelievable tragic loss in your life so much energy and, and, and went after it. And I just, you know, respect the daylights out of you for that. That's a, that's a tough thing to get over. So, so my, my heart's with you on that. And every day you get up and you honor that. It's so cool. So thank you for sharing that. I know you've given that story a few times, but I'll tell you that it's heartbreaking every time you hear it. It's got to be tough to tell every time you tell it. Is that safe to say? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't ever want it to be something that's just an elevator pitch. It's my why.

And it's my why and it's my passion. And, you know, I always want to be in touch with it because that's what grounds me. And you have the option or I feel like you have the option of being better or being bitter. And I wanted to be better. You know, my children were still young when this happened a few years ago, especially my daughter. She was about to go into her teenage years. And I remember having this moment of, I have to do the eulogy for Sawyer because I want her as a up-and-coming teenager to say, you know what, my mom was strong enough to do this. I can get through whatever is in front of me that is a challenge. I knew that

she would remember that moment. And I wanted to make sure that she knew that she came from a strong woman and that she had it in her to keep it going. And like I said, you're either better or you're better. And I wanted to be better. I love that. And in getting better and telling your own story, you've put out so much video, so much amazing person-to-person content that has really illustrated how incredible you are and honoring Sawyer. And that's led to this huge win that I want to ask you about. And first of all, huge congratulations to Pinky. Oh, thank you. You just, as of like a day or two ago, won this big award of being recognized as one of the top video influencers in real estate by BombBomb, who's just such a cool company.

Tell us, how did you get there? Tell us about that award and how we got there with this, because they didn't just go draw your name out of a hat. They were like, oh my gosh, this lady earned this thing. First of all, what is it? Tell us what this BombBomb Award is. Well, you know, BombBomb just started this last year and I was actually excited because I got, last year I got number two in the live video real estate influencer

category, which they didn't do this year. But basically BombBomb goes and they vote for your peers in the video realm and, you know, in the real estate world that you think to fit into a certain category. So this year I ended up in the all around content category, and it was about where you're putting your content in this particular category. It's like, not just Facebook live, or it's not just Instagram. It's sharing it out across different platforms and using the same subject in different ways, depending on that forum. So it was super awesome to be, you know, first of all, nominated, but then to be recognized in the top 10. I mean, there are some really cool, amazing people that are creators on there. And just to find out that I was, I think I'm number seven this year. So it resonates with

me because I do put out video. And it's hard sometimes. People don't realize that to create an entertaining, engaging, educational video, it's not just popping it on the camera on your phone and being like, hey, I'm here and this is me and I'm so excited. You really have to do a little bit of work and a whole lot of work, actually, and really know what you're doing before you get in front of that camera to be able to execute that. And like, just, I'm so excited about it. Like there are a lot of awards out there and this one is just one

that I just get really excited about because I do love my BombBomb and I do love my BombBomb peeps. So it was a huge shout out. Ah, so cool. And I mean, great company as well. For those of you that don't know BombBomb, go check it out.

It's B-O-M-B- B-O-M-B.com. And it's how you can send video emails to people. Basically, it's more than text. It is you communicating with people. And that's really, Sue, what you've become so good at in video is communicating with people as a human being. And you keep talking about getting in front of the camera and some of the psyching yourself up part and the professional and, you know, some of the psyching yourself up part and,

and the professionalism that you utilize, do you really need to, do you need a video production crew? Or, I mean, how do you, I noticed when you interviewed me, you, you, uh, you shot it on your iPhone and broadcast it on social media. Is that, is that all it takes or what? I mean, tell, tell us about that. Yeah, I definitely believe that that's all it takes. You know, when we relocated from Brooksville down to Naples, it was funny because my husband was like, you can't afford a videographer anymore. Because I was doing videos up there beforehand, and they were mainly listing videos. But then I came here after Michael Thorne gave me a little boot camp, him and Jesse Peters, and they said, okay, you need to do community videos. And my husband was like, you can't afford to be out there, you know, having a videographer editing

and let's face it, Naples is a little more expensive than the average place. So, you know, he's like, you're going to have to figure out how to do this on your own. So that was me, my phone, a camera and a tripod. You know what I mean? Like it was a microphone and that was it. And I just started slowly figuring out how to do it on my phone to the point that now I'm like, oh, I got to get on my desktop and edit something like that's complicated. Well, it's more time consuming, I should say. But yeah, I'm a firm believer in you have everything in the palm of your hand. So don't give me any excuses. Just go out there and start creating products that then you can tweak on and get better at.

So, yeah, I really embrace Facebook Live. I think that's a great forum just because you don't have to be intimidated by the editing aspect. You can get the product out there and share it across so many great platforms. And there's so many things you can do with it. It's amazing. I love what you said. Don't give me any excuses. Just get out and do it.

Right? Yes. I hate excuses. I'm with you. I love what you said. Don't give me any excuses. Just get out and do it. Right? Yes. I hate excuses. I'm with you. I love it. You know, it's, if all we do is think about reasons why we shouldn't be doing video, then we'll never get any done. But you're right. And I've watched you create some of these videos and it's, it's cool because you might see Pinky walking down the hall at a convention or conference or whatever. And she sees somebody and she's like, all right, let's go. It's go time. So she's like a ninja. It just jumps on the video. And next thing you know, she's doing an interview with somebody or just riffing on something,

a thought or idea that you've got. I mean, that's cool. And it's just because you have the guts to say, all right, push record, right? Oh, yeah. I mean, it's definitely one of those things that you just have to push the button. And so many people don't even know where the video camera is on their phone. And I'm like, don't you even play with the thing? Take it out and look at it and then decide whether or not it's too complicated to use. But you have to get yourself educated first and go on there and just play

with it. You don't have to post it so the whole world can see it. You can post it just to get your comfort level up. And one of my newest things that I absolutely love, and I know you're on there is Instagram stories. And I really encourage people to get out there and try Instagram stories because it's a 15 second video and it pushes you to say what you need to say in 15 seconds and then go on to the next thing. And so it makes you articulate and it helps you to say what you need to say in 15 seconds and then go on to the next thing and so it makes you articulate and it helps you practice and it's such a great forum and my big passion after winning this year was I looked at the the amount of winners right and I think there was like 78 or 79 really great awesome people and of that it was like 58 were

men and only 21 were women. And while these women are outstanding, awesome women, I want to help the other ladies in the world get over their fear of not having their makeup on, that they need to lose the baby weight, whatever it is. My goal for 2019 is to help these women get in front of the camera and get over their fear. Well, thank you. And that helps me because I'm not wearing any makeup and I have some baby weight right now.

So I need to get over that. In fact, I'm going to shoot an Instagram story here which is why we have this cool thing called Smiling in Conversations. And you don't have to wait to be in person to do it now. So it's pretty neat. And that's something you've done such a great job of is your videos are so uplifting as well. You share your smile and the sunshine and ideas and things like that. And even emotion. I remember one where you're talking about Sawyer and just sitting there discussing it. And I'm going, whoa, this is powerful.

And I mean, just as a human being, you go, you're amazing. And I appreciated you sharing your feelings. It was so cool. So anyhow, hey, the podcast is called Start With A Win, as you know. How do you start your day with a win? I mean, what do you do to make the rest of your day amazing? Do you have anything that you get into? I mean, do you shoot video, go exercise?

I mean, what is it? Well, you know, I'll tell you, I get up and I hate to use the word meditate because it sounds like I'm in a closet with dark rooms and candles. Like that's not what I do for a meditation. It's me getting outside and whether it's walking the beach or walking my dog, I feel the need to like be outside for at least 15, 20 minutes. And I like to focus on, you know, the sky and look at how large of a world we live in and how small I am. And then, you know, I like to look at the ground and ground myself and remind myself that I'm here for a reason. That, you know, even though I'm a small person on this gigantic earth, that I still have a reason of existence. And then while I'm doing that, I take in a podcast.

And it might be Adam. Hello. Hey, start with a win. Start with a win. But you know, I'm a huge Gary Vee fan. So I love to listen to him to get me pumped up and going in the morning. Oprah has a great one as well. Even if it's just something like from social media examiner listening, I feel like if I'm learning something first thing in the morning, it gets my brain going and starts making me think about my day and how I can incorporate it into the rest of my day. Because I feel like if we're not learning, we're not growing and you might as well just give up at that point. I love it. I love it, Sue. Some amazing podcasts. I listen to those as well. Gary Vee, Oprah, Social Media Examiner, and of course, Start With A Win. I mean, just

great, great podcast. In fact, a lot of those are on my listen list. All of them are on my listen list. So, hey, are you ready for a little lightning round action here? Okay, sure. All right. I got a few questions for you. First of all, best book. What do you think? I have two favorites.

I have my Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook with Gary Vee. Right. And the reason I love it is because when I lost Sawyer, that's when I first met Gary Vee, so to speak, was through that book. And it inspired me to do social media in a whole new way. So that one is my love it, got to do it, you know, book. My other one is called Be Brave or Brave Enough by Cheryl Strad. And Cheryl Strad, I heard her on Oprah. And this book is a book of quotes you have never heard of that she has written that will kick you in the hiney and get you motivated every single time. Love it. Okay. All right. Speaking of quotes, best quote.

Which best quote? I have two. I got two. So the first one is, it's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice. And that's by Sir John Templeton. And then the second one is, the most important days in your life are the day that you are born and the day you find out why, which is Mark Twain. Oh, those are awesome. All right. Very cool. Okay. And last question, lightning round. What piece of advice do you have for our listeners? Own it. Own your story. Don't let anybody else own your story. You are in charge of it. Get out there and tell it and no excuses.

Just get out there and own your story. And so many people want to put up on this facade and blah, blah, blah. No, go out there, share who you are with the rest of the world, and you'll find that you have a much more prosperous life. That's awesome. Hey, Pinky, thank you so much for sharing your story with us today. You are owning it, okay? And I love the advice you have for everybody. I love your why. And you truly do start with a win. You're an amazing person. We appreciate you. If you're down in Naples, check out Sue Pinky Benson with Remax for all your real estate needs. Thanks a lot, Sue. And we'll catch up with you real soon.

Thank you, Adam. So happy to be here. I'm so pleased. Thank you. Thank you so much for joining us today. Make sure to head over to startwithawin.com to get more great content. Please subscribe and rate the show on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts. Follow Adam on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. And remember, start with a win. Bye. you