StarTalk Radio - The Science of Sex (Part 2)

Episode Date: August 25, 2013

The Science of Sex comes to its inevitable climax when Neil deGrasse Tyson, Kristen Schaal and Charles Liu discuss human, primate and alien sexuality with Dr. Ruth Westheimer and Mary Roach. Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to new episodes ad-free and a whole week early.

Welcome to StarTalk, your place in the universe where science and pop culture collide. StarTalk begins right now. Welcome to StarTalk Radio. I'm your host, Neil deGrasse Tyson. I'm an astrophysicist with the American Museum of Natural History here in New York City, where I also serve as director of the Hayden Planetarium. And today, the topic is the science of sex. And who else could I possibly bring in to talk about this but the one, the only, the inimitable Dr. Ruth. Dr. Ruth, welcome to StarTalk Radio.

I love the way you said sex. Say that one more time. Sex. Very sexy. Now, we went to the Facebook page, and I got some questions from a few people, and some interesting ones here. I don't know if you know that I was an accessory to the demotion of Pluto from its planet status, and it's now just called a dwarf planet. Okay. And so someone who wrote in was aware of this fact and had a question related to this. This is D. Haventon Wilson.

Concerning Pluto's planetary status, does size really matter? Wonderful question. Neil, tell all of your viewers, size of that part of the male anatomy that we are talking about, the penis, size does not matter. A woman's vagina can accommodate all sizes. Now, if somebody has a minuscule one, that's a different story. That's another story. I sent him to a urologist. But here's… You have a whole set of…

You have a whole network. Of course. But here's what I tell, there are men who are very concerned about it. And here's what I tell them to do. Preoccupied even. But here's what I tell them to do. Not in your studio, at home. Stand in front of

a full-length mirror. Bring yourself to sexual satisfaction. Stand there. Admire the direction. You will never worry about penis size again. Really? And women have to know

never to say to somebody like you or anybody in your studio, my last lover had a bigger one. That would be terrible. That would be very destructive. So loud and clear. So there's a whole psychology to this.

That's what it is. Loud and clear. It does not matter the size. Now, how about in the animal kingdom, typically when we want to justify certain behavior in society, we find some other animal out there that does what we want ourselves to do and say, see. So, for example, the bald eagle, they make for life, right? They build a nest, huge. They're like condos up there in the trees. I mean, I've seen some, have you seen a bald eagle nest? It's huge. And it's so maternal,

paternal. And they say, we should be doing that too. But then there are other animals that all they do is copulate with whoever is closest to them every day of their lives. And so do you have any sense of whether humans are naturally monogamous? You are very fortunate that I'm not Sigmund Freud. Because right away I would say, I know where you are going with that question. No, I'm not. However, I want to tell you something. I'm not a zoologist. My museum has zoologists, but all the animals they work on are dead. There's stuff.

But I really don't have an answer. You see, somebody like me has to be able to have the courage to say, I don't know. Not enough people say they don't know. I know that in our culture, most people want to have a significant other. They want to have somebody they can count on, even if it's not the same person throughout life. Serial monogamy in that limit, yes. But the idea that you walk around, I'm not telling you personally, that people walk around and say, I wonder how that person would be in that position. It's hard sometimes not to think that, right? And it's okay.

People walking by, you know. Half naked. And it's okay to think, but don't touch. Yeah, look but don't touch. I see, I see. Okay, so the fantasies are healthy. The fantasies are very helpful, especially in our world, because there are so many pressures on everybody.

So to use fantasies is wonderful. Okay. And is there anything in your life that has surprised you most about the human nature, either good or bad? Something that just came out of left field and you say, my gosh, that's shocking. Shocking good or shocking bad? Very good point. You're part of the psychology of people's, the dynamic of human emotion and interaction. In my, a sex therapist like myself, psychologist, psychosexual therapist, has to know one's limitations.

If a person walks into my office and I, in that intake, in that first encounter, I realized they are depressed man or woman I don't give them a second appointment with me I say you have to go and see a psychiatrist so it's very important that you know your own limitations when you are trying to help people Maybe the funniest question where I was able to show the philosophy of how I teach is a young man calling, I told it on David Letterman, a young man calling saying his girlfriend, they love each other, they're going to get married, they have terrific good sex, they don't want to be parents right now, so they are using what? The pill? Contraception. I was very happy. They love each other. They're going to get married. I said, what's your comment?

And he said that his girlfriend likes to toss onion rings on his erect penis. I did what you are doing. I giggled because a good sex therapist has to visualize what people do. And it permitted me to state my philosophy. Anything two consenting adults do on their kitchen floor, living room couch, bedroom, is perfectly all right. Including ring toss. Whatever. So here's the point. In the Talmud, in the Jewish tradition, it says, a lesson taught with humor is a lesson retained. I could never tell you a joke.

I hear jokes every day. They go in one ear and out the other. But I can hear of a question or I can hear of a situation in my office that can make me laugh and that I can use as an educational moment. As a tool. Before we take a break, here's some of the science behind human arousal, Charles. I'm taking notes. You're taking notes. Okay. And when we're interested in someone, our pupils become dilated and studies have confirmed that heterosexual men tend to rate women with wider pupils as more attractive and feminine. It's too bad we can't see other people's pupils on the

radio. Or see it in a dark club, right, where most of this action takes place. Oh, yeah. On the other hand, heterosexual women only moderately preferred men with dilated pupils. And so that means perhaps women like men to be interested, but not too excited, perhaps. And also, arousal causes our brains to release, I've got it written here, norepinephrine. Norepinephrine. Okay, see, that's why I have you on the show. Professor of astrophysics, Charles Liu here. Norepinephrine, there we go, thank you, which stimulates sweat glands. The human palm has 3,000 sweat glands per inch.

So that sweaty palm feeling is real. You know, no wonder our hands get that way when we get close to someone we're interested in. Oh, yes. Well, when StarTalk Radio returns, we'll learn much, Neil deGrasse Tyson, and I'm here with Kristin Shaw. Such a pleasure to be here, Neil. It is. Thanks for having me be here, Neil. Thank you. Thanks for having me. I love having you on this. And I got you here because, not just because you're funny and I like having you around,

but on this show of The Science of Sex, who knew that you had written a book called The Sexy Book of Sexy Sex? Yeah, I know a lot about sex. And that makes you an expert. It does. It does. I wouldn't trust what I say. I'm just saying.

And you're here on the Botticelli remake here. And Botticelli's got nothing on you with Venus coming out of the seashell. So we also have clips from my interview with Mary Roach, who wrote the book Bonk. Bonk. Bonk, all about sex, the science of sex. Bonk, the sexiest word in the human language. Is it? Bonk.

So we've got those clips. We'll put them in. In the next clip, we talk about porn. And I always wondered, you know, I think guys look at porn more than women do. So what's up with that? Do you have any insight into that? I do, Neil, because I was just saying, I think that, because this generation of kids can

access porn so easily now. And I'm worried. They don't have to walk into peep shows on 42nd Street. All they have to do is say, yes, I'm 18, and they've got all the porn they can handle. Right, right. But I'm worried that the girls who watch it are going to grow up being attracted to men without faces. Because the camera's always down here. Well, okay, is that a problem?

There are plenty of guys attracted to women without reference to their faces. Oh, the butterfaces. So there's precedent for that. So any other insight into porn? Well, you know, I do think that it's helpful, actually. Because the stereotype is like the teenage boy getting a hold of the magazine. You know? I mean, that's the, you don't think of the teenage girl getting a hold of, that's not,

the same stereotype isn't there. It isn't there. It isn't there. Did you? Did you? I know, well, boy, yeah. When I was, this is trouble. When I was pretty young, I would say I was.

You're still pretty young. Thank you. Okay. I can't remember the exact age, but I would say maybe like early high school, late junior high. I did come across a dirty video that I didn't know what it was. See, guys would have been there by 12, okay? So you're saying, oh, in high school sometimes I came across a dirty video and couldn't identify it. I know.

It was like hot nights on the beach. And I was like, what is this? Is this a new police academy? You know, and I like popped it in. And I was like, what is this? Is this a new police academy? And I popped it in. And I was like, ho, ho. I saw two guys. And they were double teaming a lady. And it was the first time I'd seen sex.

And that image is like, wha. It is branded in my brain. If I meet those actors, I mean, they'll be a lot older. But I'll be like, I saw you guys. I know what you did on that hot summer night. I know where you were. Wow, I'll never forget. How's your butt? Is your mole still there? I know who you are.

How's your butt? Because it was so jarring. If you've never seen it, right. But I do think for old... And that messed you up for life. No, I was pretty healthy about it, I guess. But I think it's good when people watch porn, like people who are in a relationship or whatever,

if you do want to watch it from time to time. You get some ideas. You get some ideas and it's fun, but you don't want to do it too much. Just like you don't want to do one thing in sex too much, because it kind of gets gross. Okay. You've got to shake it up with sex and with porn a little porn here a little porn how about romance how about romance i don't like romance what kind of girl are you i'm kidding yeah roman dr ruth was 100 right she was talking about you know the men

who take the viagra and are ready to do it but they've ignored their wife right but they walk past the bouquet of roses and past the box of chocolates yeah and they're and they've ignored their wife. Right, right. They've walked past the bouquet of roses and past the box of chocolates. Yeah. And they've got their divining rod ready to find its target. Yeah. And all the romance is gone. Yeah. That's what you're saying. Yeah, romance only makes sex hotter.

And I think that you're dumb not to think so. You're just a guy not to think so. I guess so. But, I mean, on an emotional level, if you're connecting romantically, the woman is going to want to give so much more back in a way. And guys are just idiots about this.

Well, they've got to smarten up. Smarten up, guys. Smarten up. Let's go to my next clip with Mary Roach. She was kind enough to visit me in my office at the end of Planet Zero.

That's huge. How'd you even get her? I know, it was fun. It was fun. And I pulled out my trusty microphone and let's talk about arousal and the role of pornography.

Okay. Usually what's going on with the scientists in the white coats and the people having sex, it's one person and a finger or a vibrator. I mean, if you're studying arousal and orgasm, you don't need two people. So just for simplicity's sake,

just you have one person come in and whether they're in an MRI or whatever, you're rigging them up for measurement. It's simpler to step. So it's really just the autonomic response. So it's not the arousal triggered by another person. It assumes you could do it yourself or that a machine can do it to you. And sometimes they show – they'll show – Pictures.

Yes, they call it visual erotic stimulation. It's porn. VES. Get that in one syllable. Porn. Yeah. So they'll show snippets. And I thought there was a special educational scientific research porn supply house.

I said, where do you get these films? And she looked at me like, of course, you get them at the porn shop. Yeah, the porn shop. On the corner porn shop. Yeah. There's not a special medical version. Not a prescription. I did. on the corner porn shop yeah they're not a special medical version not a prescription for i thought it was like a special somehow sanitized erotic scientific video but no is there an

understanding of why women are perfectly arousable with soft core porn in ways that a man might require hardcore porn do they look at sex differences among arousal? They did. Well, you know, this is kind of counterintuitive, but what they found, surprisingly, that men were aroused by porn that fit their sexual orientation. Like, they weren't aroused by gay or if there are animals involved or whatever. They were aroused by men and women having sex or women and women because there's two naked women. But the women responded to anything. The entire spectrum.

The entire spectrum. Animals. Anything. You name it. They responded in terms of the measurement you know what they would say but what the body was reacting vaginal blood because they can't say well or they just didn't pick up on it like either they were in denial or they were so subtle that they weren't picking up on it but physiologically they responded to everything they used i think some images of bonobo monkeys anything anything no one thinks that people think of you know men as being visually stimulated and to everything. They used, I think, some images of bonobo monkeys. Anything. Anything will turn a woman on. No one thinks that. People think of, you know, men as being visually stimulated and women as

just could care less. But if you asked the women, they wouldn't necessarily say that. I mean, they might say, that didn't do anything for me. But they're- We have electrodes that say otherwise. Their vaginas were saying otherwise. And this is also, there's a disconnect with women between the vagina, the body, and the brain. Like Viagra actually does quote-unquote work on women. It does increase vaginal blood flow, but the women don't pick up on it.

They don't feel aroused. It doesn't change the urge. It doesn't change the, no, no. It does have an effect, but it doesn't do what it's supposed to do, which is make them feeling like they want to have sex. Right, so it doesn't affect the libido. It doesn't affect the libido. So that is an interesting disconnect that isn't there with men so much and i asked a researcher like well why why is that she said well it could be just because if you're a man

you know and you have an erection it's kind of hard to ignore and you're a woman it's a little more subtle wow so women are turned on by everything. Yeah, that's awesome. Even if you won't admit it to yourself. Well, I'll admit it. I've watched game porn, and I really like it. Really? Yeah. Hey, guys. Guys do it.

Well, that's two guys. Four guys in a train. They can do that. Okay, and four women. They can do a lot of stuff. But what Mary Roach was saying, it's animals. Bonobos monkeys are incredible, too. You should do a whole segment on them they

they just like it yeah they just like they'll hump you to say hello they're amazing and they're very close genetically to us so maybe we're in denial of true inner urges maybe you know usually to find monogamous other animals we have to like find tree shrews or something or bald eagles but not the very closest genetic identity to us the bonobo chimps so what do you know about bonobos did you like see the nature channel oh yeah well i researched them for the book we have a section we have a section in the book about them because your book the sexy book of sexy sex yeah we have a section about art because we what we did is we went into the jungle and we lived with the bonobos so we learned our language so sex is there is there is there vehicle

to communicate ideas and thoughts yeah wow yeah so are you in denial of this result that would no 100 i agree you're on it well because women too women, too, I think, well, I don't know. You know, because the biggest sexual organ, of course, is the brain. And so it's silly to say that. That's what women tell each other, right? A guy would never say that. It's well known the guy's brain ceases functioning. That is clear.

Well, let's just say for today that the brain is the man's smallest sexual organ. Okay? It plays no role. Yeah. But we have fantasies, and also we have all our smut novels, too. You can't forget those. Oh, right. Like, on the chain, like, that's how I learned about sex, too,

was I would just flip to page 60 and page 180 of all those Harlequin romance novels. That's all you need. Just hit the two pages. That's when they started it. That's when they started it, then they had a fight, and then, ah, made it up. Makeup sex, right?

Mm-hmm. Right, okay. I knew a woman who was a romance novelist. I was kind of scared to walk by her. Why? Well, because, you know, you just never know what's going on in their head. Oh, well, what's going on in her head

is going on in all our heads. All right, when we come back, more of the science of sex with Kristen Shaw and my clips with the author Mary Roach. You're listening to StarTalk Radio. See you in a moment. We're back on StarTalk Radio. I'm Neil deGrasse Tyson with Kristen Schaal.

Hello. Hello. And we've also got clips of my interview with Mary Roach. She had come to my office, pulled out my microphone, and she did some crazy things. I thought all you pulled out. No, pulling out and whipping out are two different things. So to get your vocabulary. I pulled out all the stops.

Great. So Mary Roach wrote a whole book on the science of sex and all the research that had ever been done. Did you know that she not only did research on all the science that was done in sex, she was her own subject? Really? She was just masturbating like crazy while she wrote? Because that's what I did. I'd be like, wow, real lord. Let's find out on our next clip of Mary Roach telling us about sex in the lab.

I didn't set out to do this with the book. I was thinking, well, I'm a journalist. I'll be in the room with a notepad, and there'll be a couple and the researcher, and I'll just be, oh, don't mind me. Don't mind me as I watch you have sex, Jeff. But the researchers, of course, would say, are you kidding me? You can't be in the room. First of all, you might influence the experiment. Second, nobody wants to have you there.

Plus, you're not wearing a white lab coat. You're not wearing, yeah, exactly. Yes. And invariably, they'd go, I know you can be the subject. And there was one study where my poor husband got dragged into the fray. You and your husband went into the lab, observed by a lab-coded scientist. Lab-coded scientist. Dr. Dang. Wait, wait. There's a doctor named Dr. Dang?

Yeah, yeah. Wait, wait. Not Dr. Dong. I don't know. Wait, you're telling me that someone by the name of Dr. Dang convinced you and your husband to have sex in his lab while he's watching with his lab coat? Precisely. Okay. It's published in The Lancet.

I will have you know, Buster. Okay. He's a scientist. I'm a scientist. So how'd you do? Did they find, what'd you learn about yourself? Obviously, the burden of performance was on my husband, Ed. And Ed did very, very well indeed.

Viagra helps. They gave, well, here, let me tell you what it was. It's this four-dimensional ultrasound moving picture image that they were trying to see if that would work. They've done these really cool images. You can go online and you can see like a puckering lip or an erecting penis. That's his previous one that he had done. And he was trying to do a four-dimensional moving ultrasound image of genitals having sex. So, four-dimensional would be you have all the spatial information and a time information.

Exactly. The fourth dimension being time. So, it's a 3D movie in ultrasound. You know, I've seen the image. It's on the internet. Your vagina's on the internet?D movie in ultrasound. You know, I've seen the image. It's on the internet. Your vagina's on the internet? It's in ultrasound. It doesn't, it's a good grainy.

It's the most G-rated. I bet someone's colored it in and made it like real. All right, go on. Oh God, I hope not. All right. But anyway, it was an interesting experience in that it. Did you learn anything about yourself? No, I didn't learn anything about myself.

It felt less like sex than like some awkward thing that you have done at the hospital. You know, I'm wearing the little dorky hospital Johnny with the open back, pair of socks, and there's equipment everywhere. So it was a very perfunctory and sanitized version of sex. I got you. Really not the kind of sex you would want to be having. But that means you're living your books. This is extraordinary. I try.

This is the journalist who gets the story, who, if I got to have sex, I'll do it. Yeah, I have to have sex. Damn it. I got to have sex for this one. I took one for the reader. I did. Wow. You got to do the research. Oh man, that sounds terrible. I hope she had a vibrator at least. Well, no, she had a vibrator at least well no she had her husband then apparently she said he did fine gave him some viagra it was working yeah but she enjoy it i mean no no she didn't because it didn't have the flowers like you said but it's interesting earlier we were talking about sort of monogamy and i think about you know how do you know if we're monogamous i mean when you walk down the street

do you feel i'll do yeah is that how you feel too no but also it's don't men if we're monogamous. When you walk down the street, do you feel, yeah, is that how you feel too? No. But also, don't men want to spread their seed? Perhaps, but I'm saying the Bonobos are not buying each other flowers. That's true. One is not coming up with a daisy. They're just doing it. I don't know.

For me, maybe I'm special, but when I met my guy, it was just like, he was game over for everybody. He's the best one. Your guy here who you wrote the book with. Yeah. I'm very lucky, and it doesn't happen to everybody. Right, right. Also, I think if you do find someone, it's something you work on, right, I guess? Yeah, it's work.

It's always work. I don't know. What did you do with your lady? Yeah, it all worked. I mean, maybe you want to get with other ladies? Well, so we married 25 years. We've got kids. There's a whole world going on there.

And what's interesting, you walk by the clubs, and they're all like the 20-somethings, not married, no kids, all going in there trying to find the love of their life. Right. Right. And then there's a whole other line of the married people trying to find people. It's an interesting opposite thing. I wonder if the line of married people may be settled when they shouldn't have. Oh. Like, I think you have to really know.

Keep looking. But I'm also lucky. And when I was single, which was 30 years of my life, and anyone brought up their romantic relationships, I was like, Oh! Shut up! This is not real! You know, so I'm sure people are, like, puking at home. Well, we have no training for what happens after you're married.

Because all the fairy tales say they lived happily ever after. Right. The story's only up until they get married. Yeah, because then it's your bliss, right? That's the assumption, but there's no data. It's not from the fairy tales. And what was your state of mind writing this? Like, were you aroused by doing this?

Um, no, because, like, the Casey Anthony trial was going on at the same time. Nobody says you've got to watch TV. The Amanda Knox trial, so I was just really distracted. Nobody says you've got to watch TV at all. You just put yourself in a room and just write. Oh, is that how it works? That sounds magical.

You just go in a room and it all just flows out of you because you're an astrophysicist there it is when we come back with StarTalk Radio more on our show dedicated to the science of sex wow

that's not a good sound You're back on StarTalk Radio. I'm Neil deGrasse Tyson, Kristen Schaal. Hello, sir. Am I pronouncing that right? Schaal. Schaal. Schaal. There you go.

The longer you can make it, the better. I got you. And in these segments, we've been replaying my audio clips of my interview with Mary Roach, who wrote the book Bonk, all about the research into sex over the decades and over the centuries. Really? It's amazing. She researched for centuries? No.

She's 300 years old. So apparently experiments have been done for quite some time just to understand what are the secrets to good sex, for example. Oh. Let's find out what Mary Roach has to say about the secret to good sex. Okay. It's one thing to have all these lab-coded people observe others stimulating themselves or having sex. That's one thing. Right.

So another thing, if the fruits of all this research could be put into a volume that would advise people of how to have better sex. That's one thing. So another thing, if the fruits of all this research could be put into a volume that would advise people of how to have better sex, a manual, give me a recipe so we go home, we can make it even better. Have anybody done this? Yes. Masters and Johnson actually did a study where they had straight couples, gay couples, long-time couples, and couples who had just met. And they all looked at what they were doing, whether they had orgasm, how easily they had orgasm, etc. And they came to some conclusions. And what was interesting was that the long-term couples were having the best sex. And the reason was that they were...

They knew each other's spots. Yeah, well, they were also living in the moment in that they weren't just sort of going like, well, you know, first I got to do this to her and then I got to diddle that for a little while and then I do this and that ought to do it. They were losing those. Diddle that for a while. It was like that.

It wasn't like there was, but I was going to say the gay couples were having better sex in the straight, because the straight couples, like the guy would be going, oh, I know she likes it, I'll do this, I'll do that, that ought to do it. It was formulaic sex, but the gay couples and the long-term gay couples in particular would take their time and they were kind of focused on the other person's responses they were very much kind of losing themselves in it and not just going through the motions so all those things you see on cosmo these 10 tips to drive him wild now it's really more just like cosmo the magazine.

Yeah. You say Cosmo around me, I'm thinking Cosmos the universe, so I have to specify. Cosmopolitan the magazine, where every issue is about diet, sex, and how to be better in bed with your boyfriend. Exactly. Yeah, okay. Exactly. So they were finding that secret little techniques and tips was not the answer. It was more about losing yourself in the moment and just going with it and

focusing on the other person's arousal. That was arousing for people, not just focusing on yourself. It sounds really hokey, but kind of being one organism. Or being sensitive. Yeah. That's another word for this,

isn't it? Being tuned into the other person's responses and not just. That's being sensitive. Like going, okay, now it's your turn. Now it's my turn, that kind of, yeah. So anyway, that was. She's saying a sensitive man is.

Yes, a sensitive man is a good thing. A sensitive woman. It went both ways because some of the women were really bad at pleasuring the men. And this is the 70s. Presumably women have learned a lot more. The homosexual couples had gender advantage. In other words, i know it's good feels good for me feels good for you got the same organs like the same organs so they had that

advantage going for them same organs yeah you know exactly what's going on yeah you know reach around right so did you have tips of your own in your book, the sexy book of sexy sex that you put in here? Yeah. One of them was to go to the slow zone. And that might have been what Mary was talking about a little bit, too, about being in the moment and just not like a wham, bam, thank you. I thought sometimes there's a time and a place for quickies. Sometimes quickies are really, really exciting. Yeah.

Yeah, you're running late. It's the running late sex, right? Yeah. But the long and slow, really exciting. Yeah, you're running late. It's the running late sex, right? But the long and slow? Oh, yeah, we talk like a week, just put some locks on the doors. Again, this is a joke book. Right. I keep reminding myself.

So this is not a documentary. No, this is... This is a joke. These are hot jokes. Oh, but we do... Oh, I can't even do it. We had not a documentary. No, this is. Right, this is a joke. These are all jokes. Yeah, yeah. Oh, but we do, oh, I can't even do it. We had some sex toys. They were really gross.

Okay. You have to get the book to find out. You have to buy the book or, you know, borrow it. And Mary Roach's book, Bonk, that's been out for a while. How do you spell that? Bonk, B-O-N-K, exclamation point. Okay, sometimes I'm hearing bonk. No, no, not bonk, it's bonk.

And, of course, Dr. Ruth has a book out. It's all about a woman to understand her own body and sexuality. And I've kept thinking guys should read that just so we get secret access to that information. Yeah, it shouldn't be secret. It shouldn't be. Here's a bit of sexual trivia for my fellow math

geeks. When a man ejaculates, 120 million sperm travel through the vas deferens at an average of 28 miles per hour. But did you know that pigs ejaculate many times more sperm than that? No, no. I don't know that, and I'm not going to ask why you know that, Charles, professor of astrophysics. But once they're transported out of the penal shaft, they slow down to.0011 miles per hour.

Oh, man. Man, yeah. That's why we need rocket booster. Charles, when StarTalk returns, we'll end our show on the science of sex by featuring more of my interview with the sex therapist... Dr. Ruth Richtheimer! Okay. Welcome back to StarTalk Radio. You've been listening to The Sex Show featuring Mary Roach, Dr. Ruth, my comedian co-host Kristen Schaal, and right with me now is Charles Liu.

Hey, Neil. Yeah, he's a professor of astrophysics, but he should be a professor of everything. You know, scientists once theorized that a deeper male voice was correlated with better sperm quality. Oh, well, that explains a lot. Hey, I've got three kids, man. Did you sing baritone or something in some quartet? Yes, and bass. And bass. Yes.

A recently published study found that higher levels of testosterone, which leads to deeper voices, can also impair sperm production. Uh-oh. So while women tend to be more attractive to voices on the very white end of the spectrum, that may be because of other high

testosterone qualities like greater strength and overall physical dominance. Oh. There you go. Well, okay. I don't have to worry about hiding my voice then.

No, that's why the skinny guy with the deep voice is so fun to watch. That's true. Right. That's true. Oh, yeah.

I am that guy. In the last segment of the show, let's hear what Right. That's true. Oh yeah. I am that guy. In the last segment of the show, let's hear what Dr. Ruth thinks about the more out-of-this-world aspects of sex. What is this fascination we have in our films where we show other alien creatures

and the men want to have sex with them? Like Captain Kirk. There'd be some blue alien and he's got action in every galaxy. But is the blue alien a male or a female? It's a female. Well, apparently, these aliens have males and females, and these females...

It doesn't matter to me. I tell you why. You're cool with alien sex. I don't want to engage with alien sex. However, anybody who watches your program... She said it here first. She doesn't want it. That's true.

But if that's what helps them not to worry about the stock market, if they can engage in some fantasy, and I don't care if the aliens... These are competing emotional forces in the world. Absolutely. If they can use an alien, I can think of

that, what was the little one? Steve Spielberg's. Oh, E.T. If E.T. would be a grown-up, then I could say that I could go for a walk with him. Okay. But a grown-up. I think you're actually about the same height. I mean, E.T., is that why you're saying that?

You know, we have people trying to commercialize access to space. And you go into orbit the Earth. First, you have great views. You're also in zero-G. You're floating. So if you had the opportunity to have zero-G sex, would you? I have always asked the question, do these people in outer space, some of them were couples, were they able to have sex or not?

Were they? I think the answer is yes to that. Then I'll go. Americans won't admit to it. Then I'll go. Americans won't admit to it. Then I'll go. Oh, so it's been done before. But you have to get permission from your wife.

I'm a widow, so I can give the permission. Ask permission from your wife, we go to space. My first date in space. Now, you are involved in talking also about the stars, right?

Yeah, yeah. Heavenly bodies of another sort. Yes. So you are involved in talking also about the stars. Yeah, yeah. Heavenly bodies of another sort. Yes. So you have to help me teach everybody. It's wonderful to engage in that activity while gazing at the stars. Make sure there's no police car next to you

in the privacy. But there is nothing better than to do it outside with the stars twinkling. Under the stars. Under the stars, in privacy, on the porch or wherever you can find privacy. So the ideal case would be a bedroom with a ceiling that opens. That's a brilliant idea. That's a brilliant idea.

All of you viewers are going to want that. Yeah, next house I design, that's what it's going to be. And I quickly have to tell this story. Ten years ago, I edited a volume of Natural History magazine called City of Stars. And it was about all the ways that New York City, which you wouldn't normally think, would conjure images of the universe. It was an accounting of all the ways that it can and does. And, in fact, it contained the first photo of Manhattan Henge, where the sun sets on the grid of Manhattan, and it's very beautiful.

And you were kind enough to contribute a piece at the end of this volume as one of the prominent New Yorkers, just to comment on the universe in the city. And I don't know if you remember it, and what you said was, from where you live, you can't see the night sky. But you do see the George Washington Bridge. And at night, when it is lit, those lights become your galaxy. That's very true. And I've not forgotten that. And I have to tell you something interesting.

Because there's now the play about me. And in that play, I remember. Wait, there's a play? Did I miss this? Yes. The play is called... You got wine, you got a play, you got a book. Listen to that.

In that play, I recount, and Deborah Jo Rupp is playing me, and I tell of a children's song from Germany before the Nazis, while I was living there for 10 and a half years. And that song is all about the stars. So I'm going to get you the translation of that song. It's all about, do you know how many stars are twinkling in the sky? I would love it. And there's a famous quote from Oscar Wilde where he said, we're all in the gutter, but some of us are looking up to the stars. Oh boy, that's the two of us. I like to look all in the gutter, but some of us are looking up to the stars. Oh, boy, that's the two of us.

I like to look up in the gutter with you. I'm taking you into space, girl. All right. This has been Dr. Ruth Westheimer, and she books Sexually Speaking, what every woman, I'm going to put a little insert here, and man needs to know about the woman, sexual health. And, Ruth, it's been an honor and a pleasure to have you on StarTalk Radio. Thank you so much.

I'll come to the museum with my grandchildren. You give me a call. My universe is your universe. Oh, I like that. You're going to show me the stars. I will show you more than the stars. And the Milky Way. And the Milky Way. More than the stars. I will show you... Did you hear that? Well, the universe has comets

and asteroids and gas clouds and? Well, the universe has comets and asteroids and gas clouds and the edge of the universe itself. I'll save it for you. Thank you. You've been listening to StarTalk Radio. As always, keep looking up.