Stavvy's World - #105 - Blair Socci

Episode Date: December 2, 2024

Blair Socci joins the pod to discuss her special LIVE FROM THE BIG DOG, being Italian on the west coast, competitive volleyball, the first time she met Stav, getting forced to go to church, writing short stories, and much more. Blair and Stav help callers including a guy whose mom wants him and his girlfriend to sign a lease, and a woman who wants to make sure she uses her witchcraft for good and not evil. Watch Blair Socci's special LIVE FROM THE BIG DOG out now: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9oyau71a5XE Go to https://www.prettylitter.com/stavvy to save 20% off your first order — AND get a free cat toy Exclusive $45-off Carver Mat at https://AuraFrames.com/. Use code STAVVY at checkout to save! Get a refreshing Twisted Tea today. Keep It Twisted!! Visit https://www.twistedtea.com/locations to find Twisted Tea near you. Discover personalized ED treatment options at Hims. Start your free online visit at https://www.hims.com/stavvy  Go to https://BuyRaycon.com/STAVVY to get up to 25% sitewide on earbuds, headphones and more. Follow Blair Socci on social media:  https://blairsocci.com/ https://www.instagram.com/blairsocci/ https://x.com/blairsocci https://www.tiktok.com/@blairsocci    https://www.youtube.com/user/bsocci/ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!

Oppa! Welcome everybody to Stav's World. 904-800-STAV. Call in to show us to solve all of your problems. We have on the couch, it was about time we got some surfer bro representation. All the way from the beautiful shores of Southern California. Blair Socky is here. Thanks for coming Blair. Oh, Sav, it's great to see you. I know. This feels like 2017. I know it is crazy. We, yeah, it's, we were just talking about how it's, because we met, actually, I was thinking about this, you may have been the first person who I did not know at all, like the first friend I made, with no pre-existing connections to New York whatsoever. Cause we met at New York Comedy Club when I was like,

I mean, my first fucking couple months in New York were so, were so horrible. I was subletting a room with unbeknownst to me at the time, bed bugs, and I kept being like, time bed bugs and I kept being like remember that and I kept being like hey guys I'm kind of itchy like oh yeah you're just getting bit by mosquitoes at the creek in the cave open Mike I'm like okay I guess I don't know the city I guess they got real bad mosquitoes over there no one else seems to be getting them this bad but hey I must be sweet-blooded yeah yeah I was like come

come with me sweet little Greek I'll take you to the open mics yeah yeah yeah we had some we had some indoor open mics yeah but yeah that was yeah that was that was fucking atrocious sub sub letting a room with a couple who were you know, I'm were friends of ours, but just Again in hindsight how it was like bedbug addiction in hindsight. They were just the most toxic couple of all time In the throws of they were addicted to amphetamines Just like never left the apartment. I was like, I guess this is how you make it in New York City Stay in this apartment and hang out with your pals and I guess talk comedy that is the craziest Welcome to yeah

Look at me now, baby. I haven't had bed bugs in it's been it's been nine years It's been nine years since I've had red bugs but I did freak out there were multiple times where I would just like come home and be like I've got bed bugs and throw everything away and I got a metal bed one time cuz I was like well bed bugs can't be metal I had no money either that's the other thing I was throwing away clothes I just anyway whatever yeah but I think once you have an experience like that like oh yeah phantom Forever forever a slight itch you're like yeah, yeah, yeah, I went to the dermatologist

They just prescribed me like lotion. Yeah, it was probably like a specific kind. I just had dry skin Right, but yeah, you're like it, but it could be but it could be very buddy Yeah, yeah, that's so cool. It's That's so cool we are matching glasses on today. We do. They're pretty similar. Yeah. Mine are for sight. Yours are because you had an allergic reaction to a dog.

Sorry to expose you. Sorry to expose you. That's the truth. Yeah. You're like, I want to look extra fuckable on the pod. None of your fans are going to want to smash if I got puffy eyes, so I gotta hide them you're saying all this stuff You're like the bigger the incel the better for me, baby. That's my kind of guy We're like we got a couple of those Blair. Don't you worry? My main objective on male comedy podcast is, yeah,

how sexy can I get when I go on there? I want all those dudes to look at me and be like, I don't even hear this bitch. I don't even listen to what she has to say. Is she a model? I'm tuning out that angelic voice. Yeah. Thank you for saying that angelic voice. Yeah. Just saying. Thank you for saying that.

Thank you. Yeah. Thank you so much. I get a lot of lovely feedback. Sorry. About my voice. I don't want to stoke the clay. I like your voice.

I think it's very fun. Thank you. Yeah. Sorry to stoke the feedback flames. No one be... This is what really works on the internet. Nobody be mean to Blair. Thank you, Saf. Thank you very much.

You know what's crazy about Instagram? I mean, your Instagram is like so big you probably don't like see if anyone, but like someone, if they catch me on the wrong day usually I don't like say anything But the other day I just wrote want wrote back shut up bitch comment I said something about I fucked the guys mom and it was doing great people were fucking torching him Yeah, and these are these guys can't handle it and then they're like, haha, we'll see about that Yeah, and now you get auto suspend if you have a big enough account. They'll just auto

Delete it and be like you're strike watch out. You can't do that again Literally shut up bitch talking about how little guys dick is it's really taking the lot the cuz look I would I mostly ignore but then every once while you just treat yourself talking about how little a guy's dick is. It's really taken the, cause look, The fun out of it. I would, I mostly ignore, but then every once in a while you just treat yourself to calling someone a bitch. Treat myself, the day before my period, I want to say shut up bitch.

Yeah, and you deserve that. Yeah, and then, and to me also, shut up bitch is so innocuous. Sure. I mean these people are like saying, they want to like stream like string you alive They are it is like you keep you have to get they almost like make you get creative to not get to not get like You know your shit deleted. Yeah, and it's also like but they're inside my house, right?

Absolutely, you absolutely can that's a that's a sacred right? Right to tell someone to fuck right off Yeah Yeah, most I get the most Yeah, I guess I've stopped which is a shame. It was always fun I guess that's a Twitter being gone now that was always fun just to pick some random piece of shit quote tweet him. Yeah, I mean I say small I'm still on there. I don't know why I'm going down with the ship I guess But yeah, I do I just write the dumbest shit on there. I enjoy it. Yeah

Just making just enjoying your life Yeah, I mean you absconded so you were here and it did feel like you were it's interesting because you probably never should have come to New York It was like it's like it's like you were like a you were like a fucking octopus It was just like finding little puddles of water to drink like you should have been in the water, but you're like no No, I love it here. You're like the most California person that's ever existed Yeah, I Was like getting dinner with Irene before the show and these two guys come up and they go excuse me To me and they go are you from California?

Yeah, and he goes okay well because I bet my friend $50 and I just lost $50. That's crazy. Yeah. But everyone did say that to me when I was here. I loved it so much when I lived here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you just wanted to come, you were like, this is my... because another thing, an interesting thing about you, a crypto jock.

People don't know this. You're like, now you're doing like breath't know this you're like you're like now count You're doing like breath work stuff. You're like on the beach. You're back in California. You're like miss mindfulness or whatever the fuck you're up to You're just like all about like I gotta get my shit, right? I don't I have to protect my peace shit like that You know what I mean? Like you moved back to kind of do That kind of stuff, you know, you're just like you felt like you were going through a spiritual Well, yeah, I mean, you know why why in kovat? It was like LA was a lockdown It was like you know, I'm sure like three years. I see I see I was just like in my apartment. Yeah

I guess I'll just breathe there Can you are you one of those motherfuckers that can breathe in a glacier and stay warm probably yeah your guys will maher yeah when will have hey when right he's that fucking guy that just goes yeah I'm going to be an interesting man I don't know what you know sitting down to dinner with him What you like sure yeah, but he can fucking be in a glacier and sure killing yeah Do you do this fire that no I tried it for a second? I was like all right seems to be good for you, and I did it what somebody had I was doing

He's doing a show and Burt was the the big tour and so he has a bunch of random shit Oh yeah, he like makes you guys do all these activities, right? Yeah, it's like a summer camp. You didn't know you signed up for. You're like, I thought I'm doing shows They're like arts and crafts and there's fucking eight cameras in your face I'm like, oh, I kind of would rather and they're like arts and crafts I'm like Turn the camera off and then it comes back on I'm like, I'm so excited to be doing arts and crafts But they had a I was pumped they had a Ice bath and I was like because I also got I got a little into I'm not a very spiritual person

But I definitely this year got into a little bit of like self care. I'm gonna get my shit, I'm gonna get my mind right. What kind of self care? Mostly exercise, eating right, some sauna, I'm a sauna guy. But I get- But that's spiritual to you? To me, yes, that's the closest I get to spiritualism. That's what I just realized is like,

I had six months of just thinking and like, no, not worrying about about anything and I was like the closest I got to spirituality is just like I a couple times I would be in the in the sauna total dark just kind of be zoning out and then I started watching Bosch on an Amazon Kindle fire That felt spiritual. Like just putting on a just watching Bosch in the sauna.

Forty six. No, forty six minutes of Bosch in the sauna. Just right. My body gets used to it. You got it. Yeah, that's how I connect. This Hieronymus Bosch. There's a his the thing is his code. There's a beauty to his code

that we can all aspire to it's justice and truth above all else whether that's his personal responsibilities whether that's the red tape that the LAPD wants to impose upon him whether that's just societal norms Bosch doesn't care his own the danger of himself that's out the the window. No, Bosch lives outside the lines, baby. Well, Bosch is for trying to find justice for the victims. Yeah. Everyone counts or no one counts.

That's a kind of a go-to motto for Bosch. Beautiful. And I've always said that about you, too. And that's what I've always loved about you. Thank you. I'm so glad for you to find that representation on Amazon Prime. It's truly... And yeah, I'll take that yeah I mean a lot of people might not know that about you. I think I guess I'm for the first time realizing I have no

Just having this conversation cuz I just I guess I don't Have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm not sure what I'm talking about I'm not sure what I'm talking about. I'm not sure what I'm talking about I'm not sure what I'm talking about. I'm not sure what I'm talking about I'm not sure guess I'm for the first time realizing I have no just having this conversation because I've just I guess I don't I do think spiritual shit is dumb as far as I think there's something to just like chilling and being with your thoughts and like going on a nice walk and

watching the sunset and being like oh hell yeah that's sick. I think that's what it is. Okay I'll take that. Yeah no because I think that's what it is. Okay. I'll take that Yeah, no cuz I think that a lot of it can get really weird. Yeah my whole thing with well I'm not sorry. I was just I was coming good couple the guys like well I'm not spiritual, but I'm really religious I just love the rules and I love feeling better than people and I love guilt, but I don't believe in any spirituality That's a funny guy to me, but anyway anyway sorry no no um I think that I'm not religious at all because I think it's really weird were you raised religious

only like culturally like the hardcore Italian thing like we had to do all the catechism and all the classes and of course I took every word literally and I was like I have to save my family from the fiery pits of hell. It was a lot of pressure. So Catholic. Catholic. Yeah. But then when I would like ask my parents about God they would like immediately change the subject.

What are you doing? Interesting. We don't do that here. Oh so the guy I just made up is literally your family. They're like we don't believe in anything, but we want you to feel bad. Like, we felt bad. No, no, I think it was just like an Italian thing.

I think there is a cultural thing. My dad clearly does not think about God ever. And he would never go to church. But when we were like, why the fuck? You're never at church. You always go watch soccer at a Greek coffee shop., it really is and and his response was like I went when I had to As a child and now you go when you have to and when that's over. I don't fucking carry Yeah, like my mom which is very interesting. My mom is not I never thought of her as religious little V. Shout out to her

I never thought of her as religious, but she I think actually does Believe in God and is a little sad. I just don't believe in God at all and my dad But she never forced really us to go to church I think she just kind of wanted us to find our own yeah But my dad who did want us to go to church just cuz it was like you have to right He's like just I don't I'm not I don't know why I'm not gonna think about why but it's just something you have to do. He I don't think I don't know if he thinks about God. Yeah he probably will be one of those that's why all that's why people have those

deathbed confessions because it's like I can see my dad really weirdly getting religious if he knows he's about to die. Right. in a little sneak in a little fucking past the heaven hey have you been anyways I actually pray a lot I like I don't know to who or like it's not like a religious God or anything yeah yeah yeah just putting it out there yeah I like to be. Into the ether. Yeah Folks we all know cats are picky. I am too Especially when it comes to the cats in my life Be it my brother's cat Ralph Sifireto Halkius or my other brother's cat Toast Halkius or even Eldest's

cat Sumaya That's right, Staph. Sumaya is a very picky cat. She's a very picky cat. I remember we used to be roommates. That's why we use Pretty Litter for all the cats in the Stavie's World family. Pretty Litter has non-clumping formula, traps odor and moisture, very absorbent, lightweight, gives me peace of mind. You know, it also changes color to indicate early signs of potential illnesses in our beloved cats, including urinary tract infections, not yeast infections, which the

owner of Sumaya has had on his uncircumcised penis. Yeah, she does not have yeast infection. She does not. I have, but she does have kidney infection. So Pretty Litter helps us. Pretty Litter has helped us recognize that. Elders' Kidney Infected Cat. So Pretty Litter's amazing. You have to try it.

Go to PrettyLitter.com slash Stavi to save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy. That's PrettyLitter.com slash Stavi to save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy. PrettyLitter.com slash Stavi. Terms and conditions apply. See site for details. It's funny so you're both your parents were Italian or your dad's side? My dad's a hundred percent. My mom's Swedish. Oh okay that makes sense. Yeah. It's just so funny to say hardcore Italian. Again it's like I know there are people who

technically are Italian that are so LA coded but it's just, I know there are people who technically are Italian that are so LA coded, but it's just hilarious to be like, yeah, I'm Italian, bro. Oh, hey, I'm looking for Don Finucci. Yeah. Um, actually, um, actually, uh, our families are actually engaged in a centuries long blood feud and I'm actually back from SoCal to kind of slit your throat. Is that how you think I sound? Yeah, in my head. In my head that's how you talk.

You know what's crazy is because my parents' injuries do sound fake. Like my dad got blasted by a stingray the other day. Oh my god! On top of his foot. Holy, you almost got Steve Irwin? Like truly. Wow. But it was like on the top of his foot and it hit an artery.

Oh my God. And so blood was like going this high. Gushing, holy fuck. Like a geyser. From a stingray? And my brothers had to carry him to like take him to the hospital. The seven year old man.

That's fucking nuts. And like when I say that, it just sounds too... And then when my mom tore her Achilles wake surfing... I mean not her Achilles, her hamstring, like five years ago. Holy shit. Yeah, like a woman in her 60s. Damn. No bindings, baby.

Damn. Wake surfing. Good for her. That's fucking nuts. Yeah. But it is just so funny to think of that being like your dad being Italian Just when did when did the family move to how did they get to California? Oh, well, my dad grew up in New Jersey and Transferred when he was 18 and

to Orange County Oh transferred where he's in the military or just a job? You don't know what it was? No. Any idea? Is it because it's problematic? You're like he was um... No I think it was like mortgage. He was running a private prison and they actually they actually were trying to take advantage of the booming Latino community. They had locked up enough black people in Jersey and they're like, all right, we need someone to head up the Latino division in Orange County. And your girl is like, ooh, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. No, no, no. Wait, this is the number one political podcast in America. This is the number one political podcast in America.

This is where you sort of get to the bottom of the issues, right? We get to the issues. We expose our guests guests we expose our guests for being nepo baby corporate prison corporate heirs to a prison fortune The dark secret behind Blair Saki She doesn't even talk like that it's the key people off the scent thank you I'm thinking about it yeah I'm thinking about doing more voice work you could do a lot of it right now who's that Pixar yeah yeah I'm

ready I'm ready. I'm ready Let's get a new foot. Let's cook up something you girl as a period or something. Yeah, I watch Turns into a panda is not one of them It's called red She gets a bridge. She turns into a giant red panda and it's like, I mean, come on guys. We can't, one layer of subtlety, one layer of metaphor. We can't do like, it's also like, it looks like a soaked, like it looks like a tampon raccoon. Yeah, it got dipped in the toilet full of blood.

That is truly the wildest premise for a movie. I bet you it's good too, but it's like, come on, she can't turn into a different, it's gotta be red. Sure, she has to be turning red. Yeah, that is really on the nose. A little, it just feels like a second draft. It's not the first one, the first one's like madam pussy blood no no we can't say pussy or blood

about red okay and then they were like they didn't fucking massage it at all again I bet it's good you know Pixar does a lot of good stuff I love it and I'm available if you guys need my help. Oh, yeah, what's going on? You have, why aren't you, why aren't you, like, voicing, like, a haunted Jack in the Box or something like that? Yeah, I really, that's my dream to voice a haunted Jack in the Box.

I would have thought more like Polly Pocket or something, but thank you. But on either end of the spectrum, I'm trying to think outside the box I could have said a you know a cute little squirrel or something, but I said I said Honda jack in the box. Oh my gosh. You know the main thing that people comment on my shit now is that She has the same condition as RFK jr. Oh All right, RFK jr. Really I don't I don't see that yeah, it doesn't waver as much

Yeah, does voices like that right? I thought he got fucking hitting the throat or something. Oh really I think so I made that up then I don't know he might I don't fucking know what our case up to he was showing his dick to some Reporter that's pretty fucking funny By the way Who gives me who gives a fuck oh Kennedy was cheating of course the sheer magnitude yeah I didn't have much time while so campaign it is true well before that's the thing that's where he fucked up is trying to be president he had an awesome life getting all the side pussy he wants Cheryl from fucking curb is not gonna stop him You know what I mean? She doesn't give a fuck really and I believe they met while he was cheating

Really? I believe it's a marriage born out of cheating. She's anything about it, but maybe she's doing that. Maybe she's got it I think there. Oh, yeah, that could be an open situation How did RfK and Harold shine? Thank you for doing a little Producing not not from her Wikipedia. They're not gonna say story Whatever man who gives a fuck It doesn't matter that much. I think he I don't fucking know what happened RFK, but salute to him. Yes I don't fucking know what happened RFK, but salute to him. Yeah, salute.

He's got some great- He's got some great- Love your voice. Incredible. Sounds great, baby. You don't have an RFK thing going at all. Thank you. Why the hell write that?

These people are, they're internet hacks. Oh. Yeah, well, thank you. It doesn't waver your voice. Yeah, except for if I get tired or have too much caffeine. Really? Or even have one adult beverage the night before. Oh really?

Yeah. Oh hangover you're talking about. It like was, it could get weak. Okay. I was just screaming on stage a lot. Sure, sure, sure. She has to be on vocal rest? Yeah.

Okay. Interesting. Alright, so okay, let's get back to the origins of the Saki family. So grandpa gets off work long day at the prison. And your dad comes home. I think he was like mortgaging or something. Not the prison by the way. Your dad got an internship at the prison.

He loved it. I don't think there are any prisons in Orange County. Oh, there's definitely prisons in Orange County. They're probably like underground or they're pretty sinister. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. So and your dad just like, fuck it, I'm going to California? Apparently he really didn't want to go and he had like long hair.

Oh, wow. A hippie. Sort of like that guy in remember the Titans sure sunshine. Yeah Cuz my dad's like so like type a and clean cut and all this stuff and so so wild to hear that and apparently like He wouldn't play football because the football coach told him he had to cut his hair Wow Yeah, so I find out where I got my stubbornness right right right yeah from pops from your mom's Not like that your mom's would go with the flow type person Interesting so you're the most laid-back one of the family would you say I don't know I cuz you have all brothers right yeah

Mm-hmm. I don't know if I'm laid-back. I'm like Yeah, I wouldn't say that even nervous woman I laugh a lot. I have a good time, but I'm genuinely Generally pretty worried. Yeah That's the downside to having the Cali aesthetic everyone thinks you're just like going with the flow yeah having a panic attack a lot of things I don't know what about me what do you mean just the way you look that's people are stupid Blair that's what you have to understand we're trapped we're prisoners to the most like

basic like things we're putting out. We'll never escape that. It would be nice if people were judged by what's inside, but it will never happen. So you better just kind of adapt, be pushed into the boxes society tells you to. You know what I want to be though is that person that's like, it's not that deep.

It's not that deep. Like I's like, it's not that deep. It's not that deep. I want to be it's not that deep person. I'm working on it. But I would never say it out loud because that's rude and it's dismissive to other people's emotions. But in my head to myself, I want to be like, it's not that deep.

Well, that's where I think you fucked up. Because you are fighting your nature as a jock, as a blonde jock, by being introspective and like thinking. You are naturally, and it's not that deep shut up nerd person. I am not. I do have that side. And you're trying not to be, you know what I mean? I've seen the, don't think I haven't seen

the real estate pictures of when you were. That's private. That is private. 23 year old Blair blonde as hell how did you even find that? Oh my god that is secret. That's who you are bro. That's who you are. You shouldn't have come to New York to find yourself. I came here to be anopolis. Anopolis. I came here to be a novelist A novelist?

I came here from grad school When I met you I was in grad school You were still in grad school? To be a novelist I didn't know it was novelist, I knew you were like writing Yeah And then I like accidentally started a comedy That's so funny

Like very oddly, like I started comedy like right when I found out about comedy like I had like barely ever even Incredible that's so What a way to make a life decision Of course before going back home Yeah Getting a job at the prison Marry the banker Marry the banker living in Newport Beach

Exactly, which there's still time Maybe There's still time Um, novelist I love that Yeah The waves were gnarly today I'm a novelist. I love that. Yeah. The waves were gnarly today. As Sebastian got on his board, he noticed. He couldn't help but thinking,

maybe in the winter there'll be fresh powder as well. But for the summertime, he could only enjoy the tasty way Wow, what did you have any like did you have any like we had you sketched out any ideas for a novel or like novel gonna be Well, I graduated which is the most hilarious thing. Wow, that's crazy. That's how much I didn't know this was a career. You were fully in classes when we met.

The whole time. That's insane. For two years. That's fucking crazy. I truly like had some idea but yeah, yeah. I completely forgot. I genuinely forget that any of that happened or that I even have a degree. Yeah, yeah.

Like because. You have an MFA I guess? I guess so. I guess I do. Yeah. But for what? I don't know why. For who? So what was the, what was your final project or thesis or whatever? I finished the collection of short stories. Very nice. Hell yeah. Give us, what was your favorite one? None of them are good. Let's go. Give me one. Give me the plot of one Yeah, I feel like all we did was like we none of us were ever went home and we were just like out

Like all night. Mm-hmm and never like I don't know when I did any of that, right? Yeah, yeah, and just doing so many shows and mics just like yeah yeah yeah let me not take seriously this thousands of dollars education I did academic scholarship but still it was like lighting yeah money on fire yeah I mean one I mean out of state and then he was ever done out-of-state MFA That you weren't like also a TA for there's no even unless they give you like a hundred thousand dollars scholarship I really thought that that was gonna be my career Like and I was gonna who did you want to pattern your life after like what was there?

George's Fuck is he eldest he writes well he writes some novels He's most I feel like he's most famous for short stories Yeah, okay He like he like started writing when he was working as like a technical writer and is like late 20s or some shit And I think where's he from like Buffalo or something? What's the fucking good story his I've never read any of his stories, okay? Eldest no elders I think is like a famous one. I think it's called the spider.

The spider? Something, the spider. There was a movie with Tobey Maguire. Spider-Man. No, no. Spider-Man 1. Okay.

Your listeners are like, what the fuck are they talking about? Oh yeah, of course. There's like a handful of writer nerds who are so pissed right now Sorry, but you're actually super intellectual. They know that about I'm intellectual Yeah, I do like politics and I don't really know that much about okay. Maybe not anymore Yeah, exactly. I used to be I since I was 20 my knowledge of everything has been dwindling Yeah, when I met you you were like it was a fire on your way to the White House

I don't know about that Honestly after Bernie now for real it's like I am truly the most stereotypical Bernie, bro But after Bernie lost I was like who fucking cares. We're fucked Nothing good is ever gonna happen. I'm not learning anymore about politics and then like, you know But you know who gives a fuck I did know stuff, but it's over now It's all over all my knowledge is in podcasting and stand-up comedy Two of the most important art forms for for humanity. Yeah, but now you're like, it's so crazy. You're like, you're a comedy giant.

Relax. You are. Tell me I'm fucking intellectual and a comedy giant. I can't handle this, Blair. I'm not. I'm doing fine. It's crazy. We're doing OK here at Stavisworld, you know.

You're like a modern philosopher. That's true. Now, finally, something I can get behind. You know, you're like a modern philosopher. That's true Finally I can get behind I do I am leading a generation With my with my emotional intelligence I do can't weasel out of your upbringings that easily with compliments you know I served I served for a while you surfed then went into volleyball I read a lot of books and I was sort of it but when you say went in viable you played volleyball and it

fucking what UCLA yeah that's kind of nuts right yeah that was you were like a serious volleyball player It's funny to me it is funny to me that you are that you were 70 years ago, but yeah, that was like Were you like a little jock in high school was that your whole personality? I was like a jock when I came out of the womb. Yeah You know like when I've had All that cuz when you have all their brothers you just don't fucking with you Yeah, like it's like it's like hand-to-hand combat like you're just it's like survival every moment So like when I would then go to like play soccer with the little girls like my age

little girls like my age. I was just like. I was just like. I was just literally mow bitches down like as if it was totally normal. Cause that's what I thought it was. You have how many older brothers? I have two other brothers. But we lived in a neighborhood where there was 13 families

with boys the same age and no girls. Really? You were the only one or like one of a handful? No, I was the only one. That's crazy. Yeah and so like. And there handful. No. I was the only one that's crazy Yeah, and so like and they were 13 families with all boys and one girl Yeah, I mean there was like other kids and stuff there sure there weren't any really girls my age Wow, who's like the first who's your first like friend?

No, I mean I had girlfriends like from school and sports I thought I just mean like in the neighborhood and so it was just like this mob of and I was just like wanted to share air with You know like and I would and like if if they needed a if one guy wasn't around and they needed a fourth to come Played Nintendo 64 and I was just like sit there quietly like praying I got called up to the major You know, I guess you just have to throw away the N64. Yeah. I guess we'll just fucking throw it in the trash. No, they'd be like, Blair, come on.

Yeah. Just pissed they had to play with you. Yeah, and then I would be like, oh my god, don't move the controller. Don't, you know, because that's the girl thing where you go move the controller turnt. Oh, sure, sure. And I'm like, okay, so so so so.

And then I would go play when they were gone and they would, I would lose their spot where they saved on the and they would get so mad at me. They're like, Blair, you were playing Star Fox again when we were gone. And I'm like, that wasn't me, that was mom. I didn't do that. So you had to survive, you had to be physical for survival. They must have beat the shit out of you. Yeah.

Yeah, a little sister with two older brothers. Yeah. You know, like a lot of people, my beloved grandmother, 92 years old at this point, not the most tech savvy. So it might seem a bit odd to get her a tech adjacent gift, but Aura's digital frame is actually perfect. That's because, yes, it's's tech but it's so easy. I set it up for my beautiful grandmother. She gets a stream of pictures from me, my brothers, you know,

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I was the fastest downhill skier in California when I was four years old. What? I was sponsored by Coca-Cola. You had Coca-Cola sponsorship? When I was four. Wow. You were probably, yeah, you were probably a cute little blonde kid. I guess. Perfect to drink a little Coke. Are they supposed to give four-year-olds Coke?

I don't know. It was like, no, what happened was it all happened accidentally, of course. Of course. like everything, where it was, I was just going down the hill, but it was like a setup racing thing, and I guess they had like, but really I was just chasing my family, trying to get down the hill so they didn't leave me.

Wow, look at that. Your whole life, your whole life was just trying to fucking chase your family, who like, you know not that interested like they care, but they don't it's not the biggest fucking concern over there is what's up with you Always trying to figure that out. No, my parents finally saw me do stand-up for the first time at my special. Oh, wow Yeah, maybe my parents No, I mean my parents have come to Baltimore shows and now they wanna come and it's kind of fucking annoying to be honest with you because it's like.

Because you're like talking about dick sucking and stuff? No, actually that I don't care about, it's them. I wanna talk about them. Or like my family and I'm like come on, you're ruining my art form. It's like you like all the little perks that have come with me doing well, then you gotta let me talk about the some of the most crucial mistakes

You've made in your lives some of the many ways you fucked me and my brothers up You have to I have to talk about that for the world, but I don't want you in the audience while it's happening But whatever yeah, I like don't talk about my family anymore Hmm now it's current events I truly hate political comedy. Yeah, just because uh It's just like all you hear about and so I'm like when I want it going to be entertained Like that's just not what I feel. Yeah hearing about and plus the Babylon B. Just does it so good How are you gonna top that shit? Oh, yeah? No, it sucks, and it's so hard to get right

but So cuz I mean it is interesting to think about cuz little kids and you actually played in college But like so much of a little kid's life is sports Yeah, and it is like I think about that like I who am NOT a talented athlete Okay, I'm a real Thanks, buddy But who you know, obviously I couldn't play on like a fucking more serious level But when I was little that's all I did until I legitimately got out of high school and then it was just like that's out of your

life completely was that because you you played I guess you know I guess downhill skiing didn't really continue for you but volleyball did no like that wasn't even like a big sport for me you just set records it doesn't even trying. I was trying to get some hot cocoa. Truly. Yeah. That's all I cared about. So you must have been on volleyball teams then for the rest. That was like your main sport? Yeah well I wanted to play soccer and this is like the saddest thing like I still talk to my mom about it. Where but my mom took me out of volleyball because she met my dad at San Diego State and she was like, I wanted to put you in volleyball

so you'd be able to play on the beach with the boys. I never could. And I was like, bitch, I could have been an Olympian. But then I said that to Greta once and she was like, yeah, but you would be teaching clinics in Torrey Pines right now. Sounds like a good life, I don't know. No.

Torrey Pines is nice. It is nice good life, I don't know. No. Torrey Pines is nice. It is nice. Yeah, see? Do you golf? No. I feel like you're gonna get into it. No, no, no.

I feel it coming. I'm not gonna be a golf. Now look, does riding around in the cart. That's what I like. Getting fucked up. Yeah, and being in nature. A manicured nature. That seems fun, doing that once,

but like, I will never be a guy who cares It's also like I don't know. I'm I don't want to do like like just rich guy stuff that just rich guys do that's boring I don't that's what I'm saying I live in the place you you've been to this place before when I had no money Watch like the first season of drag race here We'd there was definitely some drag race watched on that on that for sure Were you that is very humble of you that you're still here? Yeah, well, who knows how long but Going to Austin next

but uh... i'm going to austin next yemeni account the right above the the mothership i'm gonna i'm gonna be next door neighbor tony has a great condo i'm gonna sit next to him to be next to him no i i mean going to condo yeah i just want to do that condo life uh... no i would actually i thought about this and i i uh... would rather probably kill myself than live in Texas really I because it's a great visit place but like it's fucking hot as shit yes it is

really it's so hot it's just like I like a city I like walking around I like I like public transit like I like Europe I love being by Greeks I also like a flight that's closer to Greece for real like it's not that hard to get to Greece from New York New York's the best place on the only Look seven hours seven hours there ten hours back So it's not that mean it's long, but I mean LA is fine I go I try and go every year. Wow. Yeah, where do you go? I want to go so bad I go I mean my family's in Athens and my godfather's on Naxos and I try and go to a different island every time.

So I went to, uh, Gerkira this time, this island. Beautiful pronunciation. It's called Corfu. I don't know why it's called Corfu in English, but... Oh, I went there once for a day on like a $700 cruise And I got food poisoning Wow I went absolutely ham Of course didn't turn out well for me, but I still enjoyed it That's awesome to eat that on the on like a beach trip. Yeah, that's like a

Homemade like casserole. Yeah, it's like a heavy ass. It's good But I like to go grilled when I'm on the beach personally. Like what? Oh like seafood. Seafood, meats, Yeah. Salad, all that kind of shit. What was the cruise? Was it a family cruise? It was a relationship cruise? Um, no, it was like this cruise. I begged my mom to go with me. Like I saw some and it was literally like $700 like all-inclusive. Yeah, hell yeah. And my mom the the whole time they lost her luggage. It took like three flights to get there. My mom was just you and your mom Yeah, it was just me and my mom and then you got food Yeah

Eight hours we there. Yeah And then you got food poisoning on a boat Well, I got it from off the boat, but yeah, but then you had to deal with the ramifications Yeah, I mean a cruise is atrocious Yeah, I mean a cruise is atrocious You know out of the way No, and then like it is weird cuz like the whole point of traveling is to be able to like go to dinner and nightlife And yeah, and like it's like curfew like you're on a field trip Yeah, have to be back at the boat at like five and then you sleep on a fucking boat

Yeah, like a migrant being like sex trafficked like it sucks That's what you are not having a much different experience than some fucking lady You know shipping containers my point and you paid thousands of dollars for it Sorry seven and that was probably part of the problem if you're gonna do it Maybe chip in a couple extra bucks Yeah fresh fresh off the fucking So what was your most devastating volleyball loss There must have been a few.

Yeah. I have a lot of crazy stories. Like the most humiliating. Yeah. It wasn't even the loss. It was my personal moment. I was a freshman and we were playing University of Arizona and it was their senior night. So like everyone came out to their entire

like crowds going crazy like was full the whole school and that's a big school and and they had this senior who's in Kim Glass and she's Olympian oh wow and amazing huge like 6'3 and was also on America's Next Top Model, Beautiful Woman. Oh, sounds awesome. What's she up to these days? I don't know. Tell her I said what's up if you see her. And I was like at the five foot line and she just drills a ball off my face. Oh no. Like straight down, like straight down.

I was like so close to the net. Tough. Right off my face and... Did it fuck your nose up or anything the entire Over the loudspeaker goes Kim glass with her career So it's like acts like it's not affecting you I can't fucking see I don't know where I am The moment lasts it was like a 20-minute. Yeah moment Yeah, it just kept the ovation must have been good for you though cuz they give you time to blink it off

So you didn't have to be like Is that highlight anywhere? Look up Kim Glass 1000 Kim Glass 1000 I haven't checked this in so long! 1000 career kills 1000 career kills Eldest, type something else!

Go to video There's no video Okay, okay, thank god Call of Duty, fuck! There's no video. Please God let there be video Thank God wait, no Look at Kim glass Kim glass college highlights So you team USA stuff you're lucky you're fucking so I'm gonna find this no, it's not on there I'm gonna do some fucking research Anyway, no look at Blair look at Blair's Saki college highlight Why does it say Blair Saki's husband video, I don't know they're trying to figure out who it is.

No, just a bunch of b****, nice. That's pretty fun. Defensive specialist slash libero. Okay, please stop, this was a lifetime ago. I am an entertainment professional now. That's entertainment. I have given up all athletics. Playing in front of that, that amount of crowd though, is better than doing stand up in front of big crowds?

Well, I'll say like, there were some crazy things, like when we played Nebraska, like those Midwest teams where it's like, they're so all about it. They have nothing else? Their entire, it was 16,000 people. Holy shit. Yeah. That's gotta be fucking cool Holy shit. Yeah, that's that's gotta be fucking cool shit Yeah, it was really scary though. Yeah, I see I was not built like me dude. I would have been like And energized by the crowd I would have been like Jumping higher than I was a freshman. I was like what the fuck is going on. Yeah freshman is kind of crazy. Yeah But yeah, then I went to grad school and met you. So you went to, you

were done playing volleyball, you're like time to be a novelist? Yeah, I was like I'm an artist. I'm an artist. You know what's funny is like when I quit volleyball, I just never thought about it again. That's pretty interesting. Yeah. Yeah, I was just like, oh, I had spent my whole life, I was like there's so many other things I want to do. I would like try out for plays, but I never had time because I had such a gnarly athletic schedule Interesting. Yeah, did you do plays? I did the opposite where I so clearly should have done acting. Yeah, I was like no I'm a jock Like I talked about this on a recent episode when by the way speaking of acting I guess I should plug Let's start a cult. I believe is out in theaters right now

and coming to VOD soon. We gotta do that in the beginning. Wait, did you write the movie? I wrote it with a couple films here. I can't wait to see this. Yeah, it's gonna be. I'm so excited. I'm really excited for it, but yeah,

I just talked about this, but I basically did that where I was like, I just wanted to play sports and I wanted to be a fucking jock so bad And I was whatever for I could play high school sports, but no, but I so clearly mad hop That I can't even ironically go with I had I got I got this far off the ground No, but I was I was was, I was a unit. I know you could get rid. Nah, yeah, yeah, I used to dunk.

No, I got cut, I probably got to cut the fastest anyone's gotten cut from a high school basketball tryout, where they did like the, they lined everybody up, it was just a clearly like, okay, everybody who's five, seven is cut immediately. And it was like, it was like it was like alright everybody line up we did like literally like a sprint and like a dribble and they're like alright the seven fat short white kids are gone and then they started the real I could

have been a floor general no you would have run that shit like a Navy that's right oh my god that's right but know, that's Baltimore Polytechnic Institute's loss, right? But then you're like the face of Baltimore sports. Yeah That is you like maybe I should try and make the Ravens you should send a little note to your high school Coach say look at me now bitch. Yeah. Well, I did play football Okay, so they know I had some athletic ability I wrestled I played lacrosse for a semester. I can you please explain the wrestling thing to me? I've never understood why anyone would want to do that. It's just you know pure brute force

But it just sounds it just looks so unenjoyable It's cool to be like I'm fucking I'm stronger than you bitch But what if you're just like sleepy and you're just like damn I don't feel like attacking a man right now You got to what I mean I'm whatever you did was way worse All the bullshit you had to do for sure college Worse all the bullshit you had to do for sure college volleyball wrestling as just like as a concept as a sport like it just looks Just really unenjoyable same as swimming like I just swim team for one year because my parents forced me and I hated it so much And but you just like look at all the little boys and they'd be like in speedos being like

Just like it just seems not fun at all. Yeah. That's what, and wrestling also. Well that's true, I forgot about worrying about how little your dick looks in the singlet. That was a real worry, but you get over that. And then- I forgot that you always talk about your little dick. I don't always.

You love talking about having a little dick. I don't always, but- You love talking about having a little dick. That's all you talk about since I've known you. I don't always but I don't love it It's a big it's a you know part of what I think about quite I mean I'm over it now, but definitely in high school really cuz like I didn't like what if this is just a shtick And you really got a hammer on I wish I'm not that kind of a genius look am I maybe underplaying my dick sell You know undersell over undersell over deliver deliver but we're not over delivering by much right we're just I barely don't have the smallest dick of all time is kind of yeah wait so then

the smallest dick of all time okay mate I like a micro penis I don't have a micro penis I will put that on the record but as far as regular cocks go my shit is what just the just maybe right at average Okay, but also like spiritually my dick is small actually spiritually. It's pretty big no No, but then I always said this about like really hot people, and I feel like it's probably the same thing with like a huge hog Cultivate any charisma or like anything interesting about you or if you're fucked up looking and have a little dick Imagine how much charisma you'd have to cultivate Enough to be a intellectual comedy giant yeah and the modern philosopher of our time yeah absolutely I always think of you as a modern philosopher yeah I might go to grad school that would be so I don't know yeah I'm not sure well we should we should bring your unique perspective. You've lived many lives

I have yeah And so why don't we try and help some of our some of our callers here? And do you have anything you want to plug here at the midway point of the show? Oh, I thank you very much I do yes I have a new special out called Live From The Big Dog on YouTube and I would love for you guys to check it out and write some really nice comments. Yep.

Yeah. Yeah. Be like, Kim Glass owns you. How's your face? Still recovering. Yeah. It's been 15 years, but. Yeah.

All right, easy. Sorry to do the math. Sorry to do the math that quick. It's been six years. My face still hurts from last year. Folks, you know us here at StavisWorld. We like to keep it twisty. Oh yeah. And there's no better beverage to keep it twisted with

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I'm on a sober year, but you better believe the second I can crack a little something, a little naughty twisted beverage I'm going right to twisted tea we love twisted tea here we love keep it oh yeah and if you want to be like us if you want to keep it twisted just like us grab a refreshing twisted tea today and remember keep it twisted all right big twisted. nice, but I try to take everything super slow because I have a History of jumping into relationships and like being a love addict. Mmm So I'm trying to correct for some past behaviors on my part and this fucking guys another Anyway about like a week ago

my new guy mentioned that He had had sex with his roommate who is an older woman. They had like a sexual relationship for six or seven months over the winter and they stopped having sex about two months before. Oh that's fresh baby. That's wild. I mean this guy's pretty interesting.

He's got first of all, older woman roommate. Just that, if you don't fuck them, is a great, a hilarious dynamic. And then- This sounds like porn. It really is porn. It's like, oh, I just got fired. Do you mind if-

Knock, knock. Yeah, it's like, oh yeah, I'm renting out my room. Ever since my husband passed, I can't afford the payments myself. I'm so sad and lonely. Just, and just, if my tits ever jump out of my dress while I'm washing dishes, just let me know, you know, it's just been me and my husband here. I'm not used to having to cover up. So this is hilarious. But anyway, two months, you're right. To live with someone

that you stopped having sex with two months ago. And that you still share a bathroom with. Yeah, well, who knows? They might got their own in-suite. Right, right. Who's to say? Probably not.

Also, you got the lady you fucked right there while the new girl you're going on a couple dates with ain't doling out pussy. I wonder if, I wonder if his roommate ever got a wrapping at the door One month into that relationship, but I won't who knows yeah I don't want to make you more paranoid than you already I should hear is not based on not based on any fact This is what I'm paid this is what I'm paid to do is to just really attack it from every angle

Keep going old But the weird thing is Amongst other things is that she like thought They were kind of together But she also didn't want anyone to know that they were together. Oh, this is brutal. Oh, been there, pal. There was this kind of sexual dynamic. I knew you'd be there. This is wild. This is tough.

Didn't want anyone to know that they were together or have this kind of sexual dynamic to their roommate relationship. Sure, it's sacred, the roommate relationship. Anyway, like, I think she had a taste that started seeing me. I think the whole thing is super messy. I don't really understand why he would

have sex with his roommate, first of all. And then why he's accepting the kind of dynamic where she sounds like completely out of it. And then why is that kind of dynamic where? You she sounds like completely out of it. I don't understand how she could have that perspective Hmm Well, I do see how she could have that Sex for seven months Actually, it's actually much harder. He's like saying I love you as he

bust inside her the second time. And this goes like, I mean, I mean, you are so it's insane. You're the world's worst journalist. You have one source who's directly involved in everything. You're just taking his word for it. I mean, yeah, this is this is so

fucked up and weird I am laughing right now because I remember when I used to have these conversations about like guys are like and you'd be like what are you talking about that's what I'm bringing that's the that's the perspective I bring to the show. The truth. The truth, baby. Brutal. Like like Hieronymus Bosch. I'm always looking for justice in this world. I'm sort of the Bosch of Colin advice podcast.

For everyone or no one? Everyone counts or no one counts. So, yeah, this is really strange and and weird and he's not telling you everything. You're just accepting his side of the story. But from our outside perspective, they had a, he should, yes, he shouldn't have fucked his roommate. Guess what he did? And he fucked her for six or seven months over the winter.

That's a long relationship. And then he says they stopped having sex about two months before he met you. That to me sounds like if I were going to lie and what's the closest time that is acceptable for me to have cut it off, I would probably pick two months. I need to call into this podcast. Yeah, I wouldn't. I'm just a little dubious about this whole thing. And you do see like it's good that you took it slow. You didn't like dive right in.

But like you can see this is fucking weird. And yeah, I mean, whatever. You didn't you say she's been dating him three months for three. So this woman had a twice as long Relationship whatever you want to say they had a relationship whether it was casual whether it was whatever I don't know how casual it can be when you fucking live with someone and you fuck them Even it's no there's nothing even slightly casual about that no matter how hard you try to well exactly It would take the world's two of the world's clearest communicators

Yeah, with like who are on the same exact page for that to be true, and I got I have a hunch That's not what we have here right like clearly the woman thought they were together this guy. I don't trust him I don't I don't know why you're trusting him implicitly because I don't know that I take what he would I don't know that I would take what he's saying as the as truth necessarily as the completely unvarnished truth You know I have your best interest in my heart right now, but I don't know why you're thinking she's crazy She's crazy They've been fucking forever why would she think they're together now, but I don't think I think this I don't know This doesn't sound like a nice ease full Lovely situation for you. I think I would bounce if I were you yes

Yes, so and now to to play a little devil's advocate here The this woman is also an idiot who fucked her roommate right so let's put let's they're both dumb right so Just is why I don't believe in roommates just to give credit where credit's due because you fuck you fucking them Smart that's why I had to stop living with stuff. Yeah, this was sucking me off too sweetly It's all one fucked up one big trough our lives are one big pigs trough Kind of yeah, this Elvis's wife is calling in. You guys are very clear communicators. So yeah, but your point though is a good one Blair because she's calling in and talking about

she wants to take it slow. She wants to be like intentional about dating now. And this to me is like a great One of the benefits of you taking it slow and not feeling emotionally entangled with this guy is that you can now see This is fucked up I'm better off just kind of starting over somewhere else. Yeah, that's kind of my read on the situation It's a little fucking weird I think you are already emotionally involved given that you are making this phone call

Imagine not as bad as you could have been worse And it would will be in like a year when this man has turned you inside out Yeah, I say take the money and run bitch. Yep. Yeah Get out of there make like Bosch and get out of there while Bosch sticks around until justice is served Let's not play fast and loose with the Bosch mythology, Blair. And I really think you should check out Bosch. And also Bosch Legacy.

I wanted to play Bosch if I could. Bosch Legacy, season one on freebie, season two, commercial free. All right, play another one, Eldis. free. All right, play another one, Eldis. I pray for that girl. I know. Hey, Stavi, long time, first time.

I've been with my girl for about six years, lived in an apartment, moved out from my parents about two years ago. Shit's been pretty good but because of how expensive everything is we're gonna be moving back in with them at the end of this month. My question is about two or three years ago we during COVID we are towards the end of COVID we we were going on vacation and we have a dog so we set up a camera like a puppy camera in my bedroom while we were living with my mom and dad at the time. Wherever this is going. The camera wasn't really hidden or anything it just was like up you know on a shelf that

we could see where the dog was. About 20-30 minutes after we left to go to the Outer Banks we checked the camera and we see my mom digging through my girlfriend's shit, digging through my shit, just being fucking snoopy. What? And then on the camera, we see, she sees the camera, immediately like freaks out about it, pecks us, thinks that we're like spying on her,

and so we kinda have to go on vacation with this just like a little bit in the back of our mind. We come back from vacation, it never really gets addressed. My girlfriend tries to apologize, which I don't even fucking think she had anything to apologize for. No! What the fuck? Unless she apologized. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely not.

We agree with you. Your mom is being a fucking dumb bitch. ...thing to apologize for. You know, I think my mom was in the wrong on this one. But she tries to apologize, my mom basically turns it back to her won't tell her anything like won't even acknowledge the situation fast forward to now we're getting ready to move back in my mom sent this super passive aggressive text to me and my girlfriend saying that we're gonna have to sign a lease We're gonna have a late fee if we don't pay on time

This is crazy, what did she see I Don't know could have been there. I don't think she saw anything. I think what she found I think she just felt like they were spying on her because they didn't trust her something. Well, that's first of all, that's crazy. Look, everyone is allowed to have Diddy cameras. Okay? What is, like, what's the problem here? I agree, unless they're charging you rent, you get to pay for the Diddy. You, if your mom wants to watch you fuck,

she can't charge you rent. Okay, this is her mom. I hate his mother so far. I think she's one of the fucking biggest dumbass characters We've had about a calling show a nosy Clearly snooping clearly gets caught goes on the offensive because she feels guilty That's what that whole thing about spying. She doesn't fucking actually care. It's like also it's their room Are they living there or they not living there?

They should have their own space and then this is some fucking European shit, but it's like Charging your fucking kids Are you fucking that's? Despicable charging your kids make making your kids sign a lease. What the fuck are we talking about here? So anyway, let's finish it up unless you have anything But like this is one of those situations and maybe you know, where it's like the boy mom just cannot deal with the boy, her son, like moving on and having a relationship that she just feels left out. I mean it could be, but my mom's liked my girlfriends more than me, to be honest with you, so I don't know if that's the case. That's because Lil' V is a little sweetie so I don't know if that's the case

She is great. That's true But there's definitely something there is a toxic version of what you're discussing for sure That's kind of like the flip side of the mom who competes with her daughter the like overly protective mom I feel like that's what this is like like she's just like I feel abandoned So I'm gonna make you your life with your girlfriend. How she could just be a snoopy bitch Those would I mean looking for I wonder I know plenty of busy bodies like this I have there. I know plenty of fucking plenty of I have some friends moms that are like this for sure But let's finish this call and then we'll get into it That all guests approved

our living area And the like little Spiteful thing was She said we can't have any recording devices of any kind I mean this is crazy So like I don't know It just like it tripped my girlfriend out Tripped me out like

Our relationship is already rocky because I'm a scumbag Piece of shit and did a whole bunch of shitty stuff That you know we've been working through that Okay and that's the other part of this Relationships already rocky because I'm a scumbag piece of shit and a whole bunch of shitty stuff That's the other part Maybe that maybe that's a little bit of the missing Maybe that's a little bit of the missing context Yeah, yeah, maybe yeah the camera. I mean the camera is annoying And if you're a scumbag, is your girlfriend a scumbag?

And is your mom just kind of, and it's like, yeah, they're making a sign of lease. They said they're gonna call. They said if they find the appliances ripped out of the wall and pawned, they're gonna make us pay for it. We're not allowed to have any crack in the house. God, my mom's a bitch. My mom's being a fucking bitch. Okay, so that's an interesting piece. Let's see if he has any more interesting details for us.

My girlfriend out, tripped me out. Like, our relationship's already rocky because I'm a scumbag piece of shit. There's been a whole bunch of shitty stuff, but we've've been working through that and now like moving back in with my parents, a six-year relationship it feels like this is just like a fucking death knell waiting to happen. Well what should we do? Should we find somewhere else to fucking live like even though we've already built furniture down in the area that we're gonna be living and like Move stuff over there or should we just like we're getting a really good deal on the price

We just fucking fight the bullet. I try to stack money. I really don't know what to do Yeah, my family's crazy. Thank you. Love you. Bye Get out of this gummy. Yeah, I mean there's no way this is gonna work here at your parents house I mean the odds of this relationship surviving in general low Very low, but it ain't gonna end like dude if it means having to work in a couple extra shifts for you to make up for fingering someone at a tattoo parlor or whatever the fuck you did like you can't

tattoo parlor or whatever the fuck you did like you can't Your mom this is a bad setup This is a horrible setup and we don't even know all of it So we don't know we don't have all the information But there's clearly so much fucking shit going on here, and if you feel uncomfortable in your home. It's like Especially when it's a parent dynamic like you're better off Especially when it's a parent dynamic like you're better off living somewhere shittier for the same money and Like feeling like you're an adult with some autonomy Then you are and it would be much different if your if your family was supportive, right? Like then it sounds like maybe you could use that you could use a little like but that's not the case

That's not the time you were dealt and I think little like but that's not the case that's not the hand you were dealt and I think somebody going through your shit and then turning it on you is crazy and I'm sure you probably did something fucked up that your mom was able to like leverage for to get out of trouble or whatever I'm also a little I'm unclear by by hearing it more it sounds like the scumbag shit happened in his relationship not necessarily to him and his parents Yeah, so that if that's the case Then you just need to fucking make this right for your girl like if you're already fucking like

convincing somebody to move in with their parents because it's too expensive and You're a fucking piece of shit is like I Don't know man. That's a lot. That's that's a lot Yeah, for real and like I don't know what the fuck's going on with her her life must be even worse than yours I she's a really nice person. I don't know six years a lot. That's so long I'm also wondering how long I have it like I'm like is this guy like 39 or 22 true You're right. I mean if they've been together six years. He's probably at least

You know at least one these are mid 20s at the earliest right? It's a thing like everything he's saying about his mom like is He's right, and she is annoying and being, like, out of line. But it's like, at a certain point, you're like... An adult man who's like, my mom's being unfair. When you're like... When you're the one trying to live in her home. That's true.

And it's like, you know... Get out of there, bud. Yeah. You just like... That's a good point, Aldous. It's like, that's the reason you want to move out of your childhood home and not live with your fucking parents Yeah, you know even when you're an adult parents are fucking annoying And you regress to yeah, you regress in like a couple weeks and just feel like a teenager

What age you are so that's why you paid to like move the fuck out and just by the way getting a good price This again gringo shit right here, brother. I the only way I would consider is if you didn't have to pay them rent like that's I'm again. I mean, this is some fucking old-world shit, but it's like I can't believe someone's charging their kid rent unless again He's like, you know stolen from them and they're trying to teach him responsibility but anyway I this does not feel like something that can work if you stay here at your house now if the relationship goes tits up and you want to stay home and regress and save money personally that's one thing but I don't think you can put your you can subject your girlfriend through this especially if you've done some other shit.

I think you should put cameras all around the house and see what happens. Yeah, you should get, honestly, that would be funny. You should show this shit. I think double down could be a good idea. Yeah, and by the way, you weren't trying to hide them. They make really easy to hide cameras now. Yeah, take the money for rent

and just spend it on a new set of cameras I think really put them everywhere get like get a whole control room. You should move out and put the cameras in That way you and can watch and make your mom the subject of like a big brother type Yeah, say, yep. Say Venmo me bitch or this is going on Twitter right now. Yep, mm-hmm. Ever heard of YouTube mom? Ever heard of it?

Well, you're gonna be all fucking over calling your friend Diana bitch and she's gonna tell everybody else. All right, Aldis, what else? Guys, I have to be so bad. Do you care if I pee? You can go pee. OK. Yeah. Oh, it hurts. Take a pee break.

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Subscription required. Price varies based on product and subscription plan. Yves, Thav, Eldest, and Guest, feel free to apply to us on the Patreon if it's worth your time. My question is kind of dumb in general, but how do you deal with getting older? I'm 28 and I feel like it's a good age because I'm not young and stupid anymore. My question is kind of dumb in general, but how do you deal with getting older? 28 and I feel like it's a good age because I'm not young and stupid anymore And I forgot potential and like room to grow

But I'm also not able to be young and stupid anymore So like I'll never be a 22 year old student again burning the midnight oil I'll never be 19 making out with everyone at the club. And I feel like I didn't get into enough shenanigans or troubles when I was. Like I feel like I've just played it too safe and been too boring. And I feel like life is moving too fast now and it's getting away from me.

I have boxes to check off and I've checked off a lot already. So I've got a mortgage, I've got a fiance, pets, a job and friends, but I feel like I've wasted potential and I could be doing better or having more fun. Get on that pole, bitch. Basically, I just want a life I can tell stories about and I guess I'm just scared of letting life pass me by

and realizing that eventually I'll have more mediocre memories than future left in me So how do you grapple with that and make sure you're living life well enough that you can say goodbye to your 20s without? Being sad about it Thanks. I mean this is age old everybody goes through this. Yeah I definitely have been thinking but I mean I'm older than this I'm older Blair just graduated college She just got spiked in the face She just got spiked in the face by what was her name eldest wait we forgot eldest

Kelly something Kelly glass Whatever Kim glass Kim glass But I mean I definitely I legit have been Struggling with these thoughts I'm 35 so little you're you're still you're a you're a baby Seven you got seven prime youth years But there is a moment Where you just have to realize there is no more when I grow up. You know what I mean?

That's very powerful. Potential is one of the best things in the world. Because it's all, you don't have to do shit. It's just all these limitless fucking possibilities. Right? Yeah, you're just like, oh my God, there's so many things that could happen. I could be anything. So many different ways past to go out past yeah, yeah, and I guess that's the right, but that's not even true

That's not you can't be all those things you can you know you kind of? Realistically you have to narrow it down to some extent and also there's realizing like alright There's no more when I grow up time is finite? Like we just all have to make that switch over from I'm going to live forever to, well, I am going to die. Like it's not going to be tomorrow. But you do you feel that realization and it's depressing. And you're in stage one of that, right? You're in stage one of like, oh, I'm not in.

I'm not immortal anymore, which is how you feel when you're 20, whatever, right? But I feel like you have everything, it sounds like, that everybody wants. So I'm wondering, are you depressed, or do we just need like a new hobby or like something to shake things up? Because it sounds like on paper, like you said, you got everything going on pretty well

Yeah, and I think I also think it's pretty it is big There is like some human nature to the grass is always greener shit. Yes, you know, I feel like my Like in some ways I've way surpassed What I thought was possible in my life, right like truly what I thought was possible in my life, right? Like, truly. But like, and it's like crazy. But then it's like none of that stuff matters if I also feel like I'm really behind on the light on the family side of things on the like and not just the like starting my own family, but like I don't have that many close relationships day to day or I didn't

because I was just too busy working. And it's like there's just tradeoffs and everything. And what you're going through is normal. That's an important thing to realize. Everybody has that thought and a thing that's kind of freeing to me as I get older is like nobody feels the age they are. Yes.

Everyone, if you're 28, you're like, how can I be 28? I'm 25. I was just talking to Rosebud about this before I left and I was like, I just wish I had more time. And she's like, you're so young. And everyone thinks that if they're 70, they're like, I feel 60.

If you're 35, I feel like I'm in my early 30s. No one believes that they're old. This is the traditional human experience, I think. And it's also important to realize like some of those feelings are fleeting, right? The feeling of being like, I haven't had a crazy enough life. It's like, you know, whatever. Like that sounds cool being like going out to, you know,

having an all-nighter and going on a bender sounds fun, but it's like you go, you do it and you're like, my body hurts. This isn't as good as it used to be. I remember one time me and my friend went to Greece. We had a specific Greek trip when we were like 20 and we had a blast. We went to like an island, you know,

and we were like, oh, this was so sick. We were just like getting drunk all night and it was awesome. And then like six years later, we kind of went back. We were like, dude, that place was so fun. Let's go back. Yeah. And you go back and you're like, oh it was fun when we were 20 Yeah, it's all 19 and to 20. Yeah. Now we're cut. Now we feel all like

Part of life just keeps moving right and you can't go back and yeah Some things you didn't do as well as much as you wanted some things you did better than you thought, right? Everything's a fucking trade-off, you know Maybe you didn't make out with as many strangers in a club as you'd like, but you have other stuff that's better. I'm a big action guy, so I feel like if you're having these feelings enough

that you're calling in the show, why not just make a list of 10 things you wanna do and just do it like okay? I want to go do mushrooms like for yeah with my friends and my fiance. I want to skydive I want to go to Big Sur. I want to go. Yeah, and just like check it out It's California over here even her even her fucking dream her outlandish dreams are doing mushrooms going to Big Sur her outlandish dreams or doing mushrooms and going to Big Sur, man. I was thinking about her. I was thinking about this very young woman with a mortgage.

Getting a Cali style burrito. Go shred some nice lettuce. I feel like that would really help you out. But no, you are right in that, like you like you have a lot of good shit going for you and what you said earlier To our caller that you you've made some of those mistakes. You're not young and dumb anymore. And yeah You're right. You're not you're just not as young that's over You just have to mourn whatever's whatever's gone, but also realize you have such an opportunity. You are young and

But it is important, you could fast forward 10 years and your fears could be realized, right? You could just go through life and just go through the motion. So I think what Blair said is very important. What are the things that could spice it up for you? Like, you know, like going on a, yeah, traveling to whatever, whether it's California or somewhere else, like going on a trip, having these experiences.

You know, I think we took a, you went, we, you went to Albania, I went to Greece, we met, we met up, we went to my cousin's wedding, we, we went on that boat. Like those were, we really had an ins, that was an insane trip. That was like a super fun trip and you know, you have to decide what you want. Like when there's family stuff going on for me, it's like I want to be able to work. I want to organize my life in a way that I can work really hard but then I can also take time off and be there and like not miss important family milestones, right? And I think for you, you're just settling into like kind of more or less a general rhythm of your life. That's also the scary thing.

When you go from college age and early 20s to 28, fiancee, mortgage, you do, here's something that is both scary and kind of liberating, you kinda know what your life is gonna look like for the next 10 years. And that's the first time you can ever say that at 28, right? And that is a little scary, that does make you feel both old and accomplished and also just old, right?

But how are you going to disrupt that, use the stability that brings you as a positive, and make sure you break up the monotony that's the negative as much as possible. And I think if you do that, you're in a great position. Sounds like you've accomplished a lot of stuff and like you can get a lot more firsts, you know, and a lot more things where you feel kind of like you're telling stories and doing stuff.

Like you can do that. Use the stability of your life as Like a positive break up the monotony of it and just like but it will take a little work The way you can just kind of live life in your teens and something crazy happens That's over because you have fucking responsibilities now So yeah, you might have to plan a fucking sick European vacation, but guess what you get to go on it, too You can do that and now you have the money to do it, right? There's a natural on we like sometimes happens with stability and if you didn't have a crazy

Yeah Cuz it seems like you accomplished a lot of like these life markers pretty young mortgage fiance pets like good job Yes, and if you didn't do if you didn't feel like you got to be wild when you were younger, like now you have the means to do the things that you wanna do. And also life is short, like you have to think, I had a therapist say once, like your happiness is your own responsibility,

which seems weighty, but it's like, you have to figure out what makes you happy and do it because life is short. Yeah, yeah. So there you go, little buddy. Little buddy. We're rooting for you. Just kidding. We just some modern philosophy.

That's this. I am a philosopher. I'm such a good philosopher. I even even those around me become smarter just by proxy. It's all right. I just got so much smarter. Yeah, you're going to have a. Wow. We're going to leave the studio. You're going to be like, oh, I just did all my thinking for two weeks So we give me an Alpastor taco

Good I love Alpastor. All right, all this what are we got? Hi Bobby, so I'm having this problem right now where I've kind of been taught to use witchcraft. Oh yes, here we go, bitch. Here we fucking go. Like, just tarot cards and shit like that. Wow, dude, you should have put this in the cheek zone. in the cheek zone? So I'm having this problem right now where I've kind of been taught to use witchcraft since I was little and it was fine, like just tarot cards and shit like that, like normal, nothing unusual.

I'm like okay this is probably fake. But then when I started dating people, if someone really fucked me over, my mom would like ask for an article of their clothing and then hex them. And then usually something with really bad would happen. Like this one guy tore his joints skiing the next day. Another guy like crashed his Pontiac. So then I kind of thought about it, went to college. college It did it to the guy that cheated on me. He got scaties the next day, which was crazy resurrected like some 18 hundred shit Gabe and then the only other time I personally hexed anyone Was my ex boyfriend and the next day there were hundreds like I'm talking hundreds Possibly even thousands of dead bees like so cool all over the

Where I did the hex it was actually insane there were eyewitnesses to this I swear on my life It was crazy crazy thing has ever happened. So the problem is having now is I Don't know if I should like be a good witch or a bad Because I think I could be a bad witch for good and My issue right now is my best friend has a roommate who's really really like shitty to him and I want to hex the roommate and I have one of his socks

But I'm afraid something really bad is going to happen to him. And I'm trying to be a force for positivity in the world, but also if I'm just re-delivering people's karma to them, is that not making the world a better place? Right, there was an episode of My Name is Earl about this. There's actually, it's funny that you bring this up, there's an episode of Bosch that was right. No, no, Bosch does not deal with the occult. Bosch, it's all just good detective work and just gumption that gets Bosch to solve his cases.

Wow, I love that you are being sought out for this ethical dilemma from 1729. Yeah, I mean this is crazy, obviously. This is insane that you're saying this. Okay, here's my question. If you really think this is real, right? You can't get a little bit of like a deeper education in it. It's all like you just do the hex and then you just don't know the level of cuz like you know if the roommate gets like I said food

poisoning or something like really bad food poisoning that's one thing but if they fucking get their leg amputated yeah the Pontiac it's like how shitty is this roommate being I think if you have these you need to educate you need to get to platform nine and three quarters quick Yeah, you really want somebody gets hurt. She might she probably hates that. She's like it's not like that It's not that's how hollywood says it is. No one's british um What the fuck so here's here's can you do a pot what's a positive spell? that's that exists what I was gonna say like

Are you how confident are you that you're in control of these powers? And it's not just a coincidence and the way to try would be like okay. What if you have someone's a Article of clothing and yeah Have you ever tried like a positive thing had something good happen to a person who needs some good karma? We delivered to them because if it's all just bad stuff, right? It's like How are you doing the hexes? How deliberate is it? Yeah, did your mom cut the brake line? But I also and this is my take and we have discussed this a lot But I I don't think that revenge is ever the answer

I think it all because in my personal opinion, it just comes back to you harder. Like I don't think that- What if there's an even more talented witch that exes you? Yeah, and there's even more fucking bees. I personally don't think, and I get that impulse because I'm very protective of my loved ones,

like loyalty to the death But I I don't think that you should be doing any harm. They do no harm sure Hippocratic. Oh, well, she's not a doctor That's true That is true you could only get treated by a witch But in one they don't want women to have any way of making money, so they had to hang them all make sense to me So I would say yeah, I would I would honestly flip this right Do a couple positive spells. Let's see how that works

this right do a couple positive spells let's see how that works can you put can you can you do can you fucking cast an orb of protection around your friend against the roommate can you make their life better beautiful like what are we talking about here why is it only hexes I'm you know I'm not with kindness but don't really kill them since yeah And it's like if you really want to try like how can we get her someone Somebody really evil socks. Yeah, or you know what and it sounds like you don't have much control over this Which to stop this point like maybe we could look into some education or something But maybe you could make your magic have sort of a mischievous turn so it's more fun and silly versus sinister Maybe you could just like You know all the sudden I don't know someone gets like wings for a day or something wings

And they're like what the fuck are these that's that's too powerful she doesn't have wing magic oh all right okay fair you know like that'd be cool as fuck if she was like yeah wings but I like what you're thinking I got really carried away because I love witches and magic sure well what if it's something like every time they fucking they hiccup a little bubble comes out Yeah, or their voice. I just you make them talk like a helium balloon. Yeah. Yeah, that's good I think I'm really cool about this or it looks like they're wearing lip gloss But they don't see it and everyone who asked them they're like, hey, are you wearing lip gloss? They're like no Why does everybody keep fucking asking me that that's kind of funny, that's funny, you know

We're cooking we're starting to cook stuff make them step in some dog poop or something Dog shit classic Laces tied together Oh shit, classic. Oh, make their shoelaces tie together. Cartoon, cartoon style. Yep, a bird sits on them three times in one day. Yeah. Because even two, you could be like,

well that's weird bad luck. No, that's crazy. But three, you're like, you start going crazy if that happens to you three times. You're like, someone's out to get me, I did something bad, this is my retribution. Yep. I had actually, when I was in, I don't know,

I was doing like rooster tea feathers or something, and I was in the hotel, and it was actually a cute hotel, but someone, like every morning, the maintenance people would bring a leaf blower in the hallway. In the hallway. In the hallway, outside the door, and I was like, I was like, oh no, this is specific to me.

Yeah. This is my, like this is my deepest. That's insanity, what time? to me. Yeah, this is my like this is my deepest time like early Brutal and I would be like, oh, this is my number one thing that someone could do to me Did you I mean say to make me like this might want on a mobe? And I was like, oh I I had that thought I was like this is a specific karmic rich. Yeah Yeah, maybe you are a bad person. Maybe. Next question, Eldis. Good luck out there, witch. Good luck, witch. Can you cast a two inch growth spell? I'm not greedy, just give me two extra

inches. That's all I need. I would also love a pair of fake cans with no breast implant illness that'd be cool. Yeah, just Now that's a power making tits big if that's true. I'm powers for good, babe If that's if that's true, I'm going to fucking I'm going to wizard school. I Wouldn't love to make big cans all across America Like fucking Dr. Strange. I'm making tits juicy all across the USA. Alright, that's good. That's very interesting. That was incredible.

I'd love to tell you, I could feel it. Hold on, let's see can I make you too big? Anything nothing I'm pretty tired. I'll wake up tomorrow leave an article of your clothing And your feet get huge get huge. Huge feet would be devastating. The Peggy Hill feet. Clown. Oh my god. Feels like you're wearing a couple of fins. When you go body surfing. Yeah, you couldn't have that. Well, that would save you fin money though. That would save you money on surfing footwear. The holidays are such an amazing time folks. You know you want to spend it with your loved ones.

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Save big for the holidays and get up to 25% off site-wide at buyraycon.com slash stavi. That's right, you'll get up to 25% off everything on Raycon's website when you go to buyraycon.com slash stavi. Buyraycon.com slash stavi. What do we got, Eldis? Hey, Stavi, hope you're doing well. Long time fan. Thank you my friend.

Hope you are kicking it as always and eldest is there and esteemed guest. Hello. Hello. I hope you are also doing well. Thank you. I wanted to reach out and get some advice from you Basically relating to dating as per usual I am recently sober First nice time I've been sober for this long in quite a while. I am just about out of month now So I have been adjusting to sober life and I've been doing pretty well about it I'm able to like go to bars and concerts and stuff and still have a good time. I am dude in a month I just need to have a drink. This man has such a good fucking social life My biggest issue is that I don't want to look like a creep when I match with people online And then they're like oh you don't want to drink, but we're gonna meet meet up for drinks. And you know, the implication there not being very good.

Basically, I've just been like, getting asked like, hey, let's go out for drinks, just like cash up or meet up or whatever, in a bar. And I have to say like, hey, you know, I don't really drink, but like, you're welcome to still do it. And it's like, that comes off as kind of weird There's someone who Mashed with me and they were like, let's meet up for drinks and I was like, hey just so you know I don't really drink but we can still meet up at a bar or something And they were like, this is like 10 o'clock at night. So nothing else was open and they were like

Yeah, I mean, I don't know. That's kind of weird And then they like later told me that they were concerned about their safety, which like they're still talking to me. I don't know what that's about. That might just be an individual thing, but it's just your vibe. Give me some advice. How do I not come off as a creep just because I'm sober? What do I tell women on the first day?

You know, when do I tell them that I'm sober? What do I do women on the first day? You know, when do I tell them that I'm sober? What do I do? Thanks a lot, Stav. I appreciate you and your guest and your Albanian. Thanks a lot. And if you could make mine the twisted question of the week, I would appreciate it. Relax. It's not, first of all, it's not that twisted. So, okay, I have some, I mean, I think a lot of this is in our friend's head here. I think he's-

It's all in your head. I think it's all in your head. I think like one person being like concerned about- Like I do know there is a general thing where it is- it is a little weird in that it's a difference from the norm. But if any person with fucking half a brain in their head thinks about it for a second, they'll be like, oh, he's sober, he can have a fucking tonic water while I have a fucking beer and it's no big deal. Yeah, like when I go on first dates at my age now, usually because they're trying to be nice,

they're like asked to go to dinner. Right. And I'm like, but we don't know each other. Could be horrible, yes. And dinner's too big of a commitment. Absolutely. So I say, let's get a drink. And and sometimes like I don't really drink very much anymore So like I just have like one drink or whatever and a lot of times guys will be like I don't drink

But it's just like it's not about the drink. They can just have a seltzer or whatever. It's just it's just like a casual nighttime Yeah thing, but I don't think anything of it if a guy says they're sober No, but also we know a lot of comics like a lot of people in our lives Yeah, I mean everyone gets sober. It does comedy one way or another Yeah, I remember doing this when I was just gonna ask when I was you had a sober year Yeah, and you were still you were an active bachelor on the scene Yeah, and I was like it wasn't even like old It's like when I was like 27, you know, and you damn that was that long ago When was that? Yeah, it must have been like it's crazy years ago 27 or 28, but

It's that's the fucked up thing of literally having eldest in my life since I was five years old is that we have memories that are Decades old and that what have memories that are decades old. And what he's described his sober year, I guess I'm realizing it. You literally met your wife. Yeah. Your first date was during that. So it must have been a while ago. But in my head, I'm like, oh, yeah, this is sober year. Was that like three, four years ago? Was that right before the pandemic?

And it's like, no, that was not eight, seven years ago. I can't believe it's that long. Yeah. Yeah, but I Mean I did it and it was honestly like Super easy like I never people were like, okay cool and he needs to think of it as like, you know It's not just for them. It's like a screening process for you So you don't like go and waste your time? absolutely, you know you can go to a bar and just have a drink and then like you don't want to like Absolutely, you know you can go to a bar and just have a drink and then like you don't want to like

Freak someone out by springing this on them without like there any prior knowledge And if they do think it's weird they can just like be like yeah I don't know not for me and just like you for sure so you so you don't waste your time to yeah Totally that's a great point judging you accepting you for who you imagine a woman be like you know fucking drink pussy You're like alright. Well. I'll see you later Honestly, you are probably look swirly I mean any woman who would think you're a bitch for not drinking probably pretty good pussy to be honest She's probably insane. She probably fucks good, but your life would be worse off for having her in it So yes, it's a good screening process.

And truly, any... Like put yourself in... Flip the situation. If a woman was like, hey, I'm newly sober. I don't really drink. I'm just going to get a Sprite. Would you be like, fuck! No, you wouldn't give a fuck.

You'd be like, what? It's going to be harder to fuck you now. But if you're drunk, you might fuck me. It sounds like some girl freaked him out like saying something about safety. And it's like, also maybe because the first date was like spur of the moment 10 PM. I think if you're asking someone to go on like a 7 PM drink

at like a nice bar, no one's gonna say anything They're not gonna be afraid of you because you're not fucking blasted. Yeah, also It's like what you want the guy like wasted yeah, anyway, whatever that that lady's fucking dumb, but yeah, dude. You're fine You're a little in your head. It's a month in we've all been there where it's like we're so much more self-conscious about some Yeah, then you know then like I even sort of Like I've been I'm taking a sober year in the first couple months I felt kind of weird just even doing social stuff and like you know whatever, but it doesn't fucking matter My god this sucks

Like I'm not stoned as fuck. I'm not high. I'm not high. I'm not drunk What do you got out of something nice to go out on? You sound like an angel good luck. You're doing great. Good luck little buddies probably relapse by now But if you haven't stick to it and even if you have get back on the horse or off it I don't really understand which way that works So stop what's up Elvis what's up if there's a guest how you doing guest Well, I love the show been listening for a long time. Thank you, dude I'm a question. I don't think you'll get to it in the time that I need it

It's a planet tree even when you're 60 Future generations will sit in the shade of this question go ahead eldest at one point in a relationship or like a situation shit you think like if you want to break up with someone at what point do you like oh then the in person for a break up you know like I'm with them six years no longer but if it's hex no longer acceptable is it a matter of time you've been with this person is it like a milestone thing like you fuck first you haven't fucked with you better family I owe her an impersonal family I did situation ship you really wants to You buy a- He said, give me the- give me the go! Give me the great life, please!

She's only had one abortion, and that was much- that was, you know, just a week or two ago. How long after? Okay. Go through the whole, like, in-person song and dance. I don't feel like this current situation shift that I want to end really warrants all that. But also, I'm a pussy, I don't really feel like feel like right looking someone in the eye. That's what it is Breaking their heart. Let's relax I just should go back there like no where's the barrier? Okay, so I mean breaker hearts hilarious. That's number one a

Couple things going on here. You won't even tell us what's going on. For sure, you need to see her in person. Because you won't tell us. And you're just hoping like, why didn't you tell us your situation so we could fucking judge it? I mean, it really is a case by case basis, right? Like if you could say it's length of time, but let's say you're hooking up with somebody and you see them once a month.

Yeah, versus every night. You know what I mean? It really just depends on the situation. I certainly have just seen people over a weirdly long period of time, but we've maybe met up six times over a year and a half, you know what I mean or something like that. Met up means. You know what I mean? Like went out, whatever, just got sucked each other off, whatever it is.

But like, so it just depends on each specific circumstance. Like you, the fact that you even threw out met their family is so insane Because that's not what it that is a relationship like there's no there's no oh, oh, yeah. Hey mom This is the girl I fuck every every six weeks My mom's not meeting those people your parents shouldn't meet those people Yeah, I mean, I don't know I mean it really just is a case-by-case you Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I mean, it really just is a case by case. You fully are a coward. I can hear it in your voice.

And you don't want to, you just want to be able to kind of weasel your way out. Now- He's already got the text in the drafts. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. He's just waiting for the signal to press go. But it also depends on, it depends on the like, how serious it was or have you had any conversations.

Like, if you, at the start of it, were like, hey, I'm not looking for something serious. Like, you know, I like, we have fun together. If that doesn't work for you, I totally get it. And if they say yes, don't worry that works for me, you could probably text your way out of that. Cause they know the rules of engagement. Cause that was very clear and everyone's on the same page

and gauging and communicating the whole way. What happens in those situation ships is when people don't do that and then they're doing all relationship stuff but someone can't commit even though they're treating that person like a full partner. And listen, if you can't commit, that's fine, but if that's what you're doing, then yes, you should break up with them in person. Then you've treated it like a relationship, you have to get out of it like a relationship. So that's our general rule of thumb. We don't know your specifics again I'm guessing fully you like you probably

like spent the night at her house four times in a row or some something insane you've probably gone on a vacation with her yeah I mean you know some of our real estate holdings are together but I can have the money guy figure that out I could just text her so so is fine, right? Yeah. So, so yeah, that's, I would say that's the general rule of thumb. Even though it's really just case by case, brother. And I'm willing to bet because you wouldn't describe your situation, you definitely need to break up in person.

And you, and by the way, you should work on being a coward. You should work on, you said said yourself. I'm a pussy I don't want to see someone. I don't want to look someone in the eyes It's like that's part of life man doing shit that sucks is important for you, too Not this isn't really who we know we're we should worry about Treating the people you date with respect and that's important, but also just as a human being having a hard conversation Every time I've had one of those where I don't feel like it. I would pay $10,000 to get out of like an annoying conversation whether that's with a relationship a family member a work thing whatever it is

After I've had a non-comp something that I wasn't looking forward to I honestly do feel like I level up every time I feel accomplished for having done that and the next next one we'll get, once you've done something hard, that's not hard anymore. The next one's easier. Yeah, and treating people like that I believe comes back to you. And also, like all that discomfort in the avoidance I feel compounds the other way too. I mean, and it just ends up making things so much worse than when you have a difficult conversation with dignity. Yeah. You know versus just like leaving someone in the dark like confused and just frustrated to death. Totally. Yeah. Oh sorry I didn't text you for seven months. But yeah it is over. But anyway good luck dude maybe we maybe we read you wrong and you can just text her out of it

But I doubt it Anyway, that's the show for this week Blair. Thank you so much for being on the pod Yeah, very fun. Check out check out Blair Watch your special. Yeah and You know see let's start a cult if it's near you and we'll see you next time. Bye. Bye. Bye. Thanks guys. Love ya