Stavvy's World - #128 - Robert Oberst and JP McDade

Episode Date: May 12, 2025

Robert Oberst and JP McDade join the podcast for a special road episode from the Dreamboat Tour to discuss ways Robert’s childhood resembled a fairy tale, growing up broke, how his parents had way too many kids, his unexpected  journey from theater kid to strongman, and much more. Robert, JP and Stav help callers including a guy who’s less attracted to his girlfriend after they’ve started rockclimbing together, and a sports mascot who wants tips on how to deal with hecklers.  Follow Robert Oberst on social media: https://www.instagram.com/robertoberst https://x.com/RobertOberst https://www.youtube.com/@robertmoberst https://www.tiktok.com/@robertoberst Follow JP McDade on social media: https://twitter.com/jp_mcdade https://www.instagram.com/mcdadebaby Upgrade your wallet today! Get 10% off Ridge with code STAVVY at https://www.ridge.com/STAVVY #Ridgepod Download Cash App & sign up! Use our exclusive referral code STAVVY in your profile, send $5 to a friend within 14 days, and you’ll get $10 dropped right into your account. Eat smart with Factor. Head to https://www.factormeals.com/stavvy50off and use code STAVVY50OFF to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping. Visit https://bluechew.com/ and use promo code STAVVY to try your first month of BlueChew FREE -- just pay $5 shipping. Get a refreshing Twisted Tea today. Keep It Twisted!! Visit https://www.twistedtea.com/locations to find Twisted Tea near you. 🎟️ See Stavvy live on the Dreamboat Tour 🛥️💕!!! https://stavvy.biz/ for tickets 🎥 Rent or buy LET'S START A CULT at https://stavvy.biz/movie ‼️ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld ☎️ Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!

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0% APR. Trade in must be from Apple, Google or Samsung. Trade in and additional terms apply. Welcome everybody to StavisWorld 904-800-STOP. Call in and solve your problems. We're in the Mobile Command Center. StavisWorld is mobile. We are in an undisclosed location. Off the grid.

We're off the grid. You'll never find us. The address is... Yeah, come to whoever's in this Airbnb months after we've left. You know, this is a little... this is from the vault, folks. This is the beginning of the tour. We're pumped to have on the couch Robert O. Burrce is here. Oh yeah. I'll just try and add a new cheer.

I appreciate it. It's a little more diffuse. The other one not as like the other one is like a stadium. This is like eight guys are happy. Robert's here. I know, I know. I think that's more like realist. Yeah. Yes.

We have, we have Robert here. Of course, Jimmy Mack, JP, McDade is here. He's opening on this leg of the tour for much of the beginning and the end. So we figured let's get him, let's get him in here Ed McMahon style. He's the sidekick whenever he's here. And we're through that.

I'm blind drunk. Yeah, and he's so, I told him, you can be on the tour, but you have to relapse. I said anything for Mr. H. I'm like, JP, you want this $85 a night, or do you not want this $85 a night? Bring me my medicine. Do you want to split bunk beds with eldest every night for eighty five

dollars or not? This is a this is a real show business opportunity for you. Human nightlight. From the inside. Hey, I wear many hats. The booze helps now. Loosens it right up. Yeah, we're pumped to have Robert here, but thanks for coming, dude. I'm excited to be here, man. Thanks for having me.

Yeah. Three strong guys. Three equally strong men on a podcast. A lot of sexual energy on this couch right now. It is awesome because everyone on this tour, I, you know, I'm, well, let's say five, seven, you know what I'm, well, let's say five seven. You know what, I am actually five, here's something that annoys me. I actually am five seven, because everybody who says they're five seven is five six. I like that you said it like a negotiation,

like we'll call it five seven. Because I was about to be like, I'm five eight, but that's me lying, right? Even though. You give yourself a quarter. Even though with shoes on. Look, when I go to the doctor, they weigh me with shit with my pants on. Why don't I get to say five eight with shoes on? You I go to the doctor they weigh me with shit with my pants on

Why don't I get to say five eight with shoes on you get it on the other end? Anyway, the point is I'm five seven. I have no you know what I don't even give a fuck I have no shame about it It just pisses me off because everyone who says they're five seven is five six, but on this tour eldest is six five Big dick Saxon who you guys have met on the patreon bus boys volume one he how tall you sacks Six five JP is six seven and Robert is not only gigantic six eight six seven and a half six seven Wow, what a gentleman

Really crazy about it like that line at five seven, like guys really, really get edgy. You don't wanna be, it's real. And some people, some might argue it's five eight and they're wrong. Five seven, thank you. It depends on the humidity. Yeah, it depends on how high my hair is.

Honestly, if it makes you feel any better, you're all the same to me. Thank you, dude. I appreciate it. Yeah, yeah, we're all. You could be six one. Yeah, yeah, that's true. And I love better, you're all the same to me. Yeah, we're all six one. Yeah, that's true. And I love basically first graders. Yeah, Robert. Yeah.

Six, seven and a half. A hulking gentleman. Top top 10, a former. You got top eight, right? I got top 10 twice. Top 10 twice. World's strongest man. Over the span of of of Six or seven years too. So like I was in the top ten for a while. So Wow Our it was one thing that I really fought for too because like at the beginning of my career

I jumped off and did really really good and I was terrified of being a flash in the pan, right? Right, right, you know destroyed myself to make sure that didn't happen oh yeah you fucked your which fucked up right now oh everything the most messed up stuff is probably like my my back and my my ankle my back I have to be really careful about my back is it's what made me stop was like I was not to start this off on a super sour note. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My daughter. You were suicidal. You wanted to end it all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, my daughter was in the crib. She's 16 months now.

And so she was in the crib, and I went in there to get her out, and my back locked up, and I fell on the floor. I was on the floor for like two hours. Holy shit. And I couldn't get up. She was like, I'll never respect you.

All those muscles, and you can't get up. She's like I'll never respect you All those muscles and you can't protect me I'm never gonna do anything to put my back at risk. I do all safety stuff now that happened to me once because I pulled a doorknob too hard That literally had through my back I'll be like ah and then I just lay down for one day straight it's horrible when your back goes out and it's like there's nothing you can do to get around it no no it's not what you want we need exoskeletons oh yeah we need that shit dude we gotta evolve into some armor yeah give us like the robot additives now. You know? Like Elon, get on it.

Let's go, Mecca. Let's go. Let's get some body modifications. I want rocket thrusters. You want thrusters? That would be fucking sick. Trying to make sure I can duck when I'm 40. I'm going to need to be rocket aided.

That would be cool. I just want a back brace. I want something to be... I want the back brace not only to help my back, but also to when I fuck, just to thrust for me. That way I can... And then I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just... I can just only to help my back but also to when I fuck Just a thrust for me

That way I can and then obviously I think it goes without saying you know a Splint some kind of mechanical splint around my cock to keep it hard, but it's still my cock I don't want a mechanical cock I want my cock to feel the pleasure but I need around it with like an add-on that pinches your leg So you last longer? Yeah Maybe you can have metal around the shaft, but the head is my head So even if it's soft the metal pushes my soft in and out. It sounds dangerous. Just first thought. Well, we'll figure out. We'll go into the box. You know, somebody's gotta be on this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. We haven't figured that part out yet, but yeah, dude, not only the world's strongest

man, but very funny on the righteous gemstones. That's we became friends. I was promoting my special while you were on. I think we both kind of discovered each other's work at the kind of the same time. Yeah. Even though me and my brothers were we were like when we're growing up we loved watching world strong. So I'm sure we because but but you know you're like we were we were younger we weren't like keyed into it. It's just like a fun thing to watch. So it's like I'm sure we watched you fucking pick up gigantic stones and throw them over your head. You know what I mean? But like, cause we, that was always a fun, a fun thing

to watch and like pretend like, Oh yeah, one day we could do that. You know, it's like, that's its most like marketable feature is when people are like flipping channels or whatever, you don't, it's incredible. You see a guy pulling a bus. You stop for a second. You see a 400 pound guy with abs pulling a bus, and you're like, what the fuck is going on? It sounds like watching you guys compete feels like you're reading something from mythology, where it's like the king brought the unstoppable giant

to smash all the canonites or whatever the fuck. That's really where it started from. Two strongmen, they say, originated in Scotland. Scotland was not allowed to have weapons or really train and stuff like that, because England sucks. Yep. And so the-

Fuck the Brits. Yeah, all of them. Fuck. That's a common through line in basically all of world history. Yeah. Despite the English for being dicks. They're like, no, you can't have a gun.

We're going to go have sex with each other and polish our muskets. And then you guys and then the Scottish had to get strong. We're going to get out some big fucking poles. We're going to kill you with the rocks. That's what it was. It was it was rocks and stones. And then and then one part of the competition would be like, you had to be able to run to a certain place with rocks and then run back.

Yeah. That's where it all came from. Yeah. Just pure ass brute strength. It's so cool. Who's going to protect the king without any weapons? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Sick dude. Yeah. That's it. And it's such an interesting thing to get like, because it, you're right. It's the most channel flipping. You're never going to switch, but it's like, it's crazy to think that that was just so your life. Like to most people, it's like a cool thing you stumble on and you watch like four times

a year stand up comedy. Yeah. It's basically like say, yeah, most people don't give a fuck about Stan. Most people go to like four stand up shows in their whole life and the, and three of them are like, you know, bachelor party, bachelorette party or Yeah. But like that's crazy. Like what even is it like to be? How do you like? What are the prelims for getting into? You know, what's the open mic version of doing World's Strongest Man? Is it just you go to a fucking parking lot and start lifting Corolla's all over all over America, England, Canada. It's huge. They've got different styles depending on where you're out in the globe like the Middle East and stuff does a lot of

like rock lifting, you know, but the amateur level that's what it is. You pay you sign up you you go and you'll see these guys. I mean, I saw a guy. I think the guys really hurt themselves really badly really and you'll see these guys, I mean, I saw a guy, I think the guys really hurt themselves, really badly, really horrifically. And they were just like, they had a nine to five. Like they were here for fun and paying to compete.

And like for the rest of their lives, they walk weird or whatever. Their shoulders and their hips are now fused together. They no longer have a torso. I know, I can't tell you how many guys I know who have their low back fused. Yeah, a lot of her. It's very common.

It's like, no, I don't need a spot for this Volkswagen. I'm good, I got this. My back doesn't bend. Yeah, it's a lot of that. But the guys who do it to be in shape and just have fun, it is really cool. Like as the camaraderie in Strongman is, you know, it's unmatched.

It's not like you're gonna go to a CrossFit gym. I mean, if you're really in shape, really jacked, you can go to a CrossFit gym and fit in great. And I'm being general. I'm sure there's somebody out there that's like, obviously that's not the case for them. But I mean, in general, when you do an amateur strongman show,

there's just all these really big people that kinda live seriously, but it's mostly for fun and just cheering each other on, having a blast. Yeah, yeah. It's just so funny to do that, like for no money and to do it and like- To pay.

To pay to potentially have no, lose a couple vertebrae or whatever the fuck is nuts, dude. It's crazy. know, lose a couple of vertebrae or whatever. The plug is nuts, dude. It's crazy. And there's a ton of people that do it too. Yeah, damn. Folks, I've been a fan of Ridge for years. They were an early supporter

of my previous podcasting foray. I have their bags. I love the backpack, the duffel bag, most importantly, the wallet. I have lost many wallets in my life. I switched to a ridge. We're talking I got the safety base It's called base camp orange because I need bright fucking colors to wake my ass up Am I looking am I looking for what BAM? It's bright as fuck. How can I miss it? And here's what I love about Ridge They have an air tag attachment ready to go.

You know exactly where it is before panic mode kicks in. And I'm a big panicker. I use Find My on AirPods and even my laptop like twice a day. I love the I love the bright ass colors. I love the little air attachment. I love the fact that it's slim as fuck. It's in the tour bus right now, but we had this beautiful shit set up here. I wasn't going to go all the way downstairs just to get my wallet. So you'll have to just put it in right here, Eldis.

It's slim as fuck, 12 cards in that motherfucker plus cash, and lifetime warranty. Literally the last wallet you'll ever have to buy they'll replace that shit Don't call them they want to do it You won't even need to by the way because the shit is so good They have RFID blocking shit, which I didn't know they could steal your shit through electronics, but they can They keep you safe from digital pickpocketers for a limited time our listeners get 10% off Ridge by using code STAVI, S-T-A-V-V-Y at checkout. Just head to ridge.com and use code STAVI, S-T-A-V-V-Y, and you're all set.

After your purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you. Stavi's world, by the way. I was a bouncer for a long time. Hell yeah. Where were you bouncing? I bounced in a few different places, but this place, it was called The Catalyst.

It's in Santa Cruz and it's a small concert venue and a bar. So like I did security for like Willie Nelson and BB King. Shout out to Willie. A bunch of really cool people. Yeah, friend of the podcast, Willie Nelson. Shout out to him. I feel so bad when I when I worked with Willie I was playing football at the time and he offered to smoke weed with me and I turned him down

You're throwing your life away He's a little older guy Yeah And I honestly from that, he was the sweetest dude. He's like, he's a little older guy. He came out, was really nice, met everybody and saw what he had, what he had to do, where he was going to be. And I'm always, I'm the biggest guy. So I'm the guy who's with the talent. And it's like, he was going back on the bus and he's like, you want to have smoke? And I was like, Oh, I was getting tested at the time.

Oh my God. It's one of my biggest regrets. You should be able to tell the guy testing. It was like hey, man Here's a picture me smoking we with Willie Nelson. Can I get a mulligan on this one? Yeah, I wish I would oh my god Were you sure that was in Santa Cruz where you're playing? What was the school you're I was done? I was I was trying to Professional so I was I was working with the San Jose Sabre cats, okay, and I was working with the San Jose Sabercats. OK. And we'll leave that to Reno.

Arena is another. Do you're the you're like a like fun shit to catch on ESPN three all star. Yeah. Arena football is strong in the world series of poker. But the fucking triple crap. Oh, well, yeah. The thing about a real dude, fuck for the SabreCatch you should have smoked weed, man. No, of course. Well this is the worst part.

Arena, two years before I got to arena, the guys were making an average of like 300k a year. Like that was the average. And then when I got there, the ultimate reason I didn't stay or do anything with them was because guys were like working at McDonald's when they weren't at practice. That's nuts. And so it was, it was just too much. My body was already like my, my ankles really started to get messed up from football. Like it was just, I just kept re-injuring the same thing.

Your whole life. You must've just been gigantic and beating, beating yourself up doing playing football, I guess your whole life. Well, so, so at first I was a big drama kid. I was I really loved I wrote a plays and I had like I had a little video camera that you put the VHS in and record. And I made I made probably 10 spoofs trying to copy scary movie. I did. I love that stuff.

I had 10 siblings, so like I have all the characters and everything. Like I made my sister chase me. We live behind an apple orchard and I made her chase me through the apple orchard. You literally just sound like a character in a fairy tale. The giant that lived, the baby giant that tried to get his 10 siblings to make plays with him behind the apple orchard. Put all 10 siblings in a big basket and carry them to school every day. Fuckin' nuts. I was obsessed with that stuff at first.

And I was really into drama. And then going into high school, I'd signed up and I'd been in several plays. Like I got the lead in a few, which is crazy. Of Mice and Men? No, I didn't pet the rabbits. I didn't pet the rabbits. I got to do Jack and the Beanstalk.

And I was one of the three kings. I wrote a rap for the three kings. And then I made them let me do it in the play. I was like, I'm not doing it if I don't get to do my rap. That rocks. Negotiating. But then high school came along and I was like getting involved in everything. And then one of the teachers just made

fun of me about trying out for the lead in a play. And then it was like, like I shattered confidence. Oh, my God. It's crazy how much one comment from like an asshole teacher, right? Just a guy who was just too stupid to get a real job. Like right. Wasn't a good teacher. Right. Like it's always the shittiest. It's like any and looking back. It's probably some 25 year old dickhead Yeah, who was just a piece of shit and who was insecure and honestly on some level jealous because you were fucking huge and like He wanted to play football and he got cut and then that's when I started football I wasn't gonna play I was I was all drama and then when that happened

I went out and did football and then like literally just I blew up and started like really good really fast Yeah, that's all I mean, that's so funny, dude I had I had the same experience but like with obviously different results Like I was a total drama kid and like they put me and Elvis were in plays in elementary school together The what was the clown one ambiguously gay We did we put that on we put on a production of the ambiguous legate the own fourth grade But you wrote it into a beautiful feature-length drama That was fucking funny shit smiles clowns, right? Yeah, we do anything else. Are you gone by then?

I think there was like at least one or two other plays I just don't remember my clowns was very memorable though. Yeah and and then in middle school, I think I like auditioned and or like they were doing Charlie Brown and I think like I Think you know, it was probably a shoe in I mean who's supposed to be playing Charlie Brown but I had that moment I was nobody had to make me feel self-conscious. I Should have I had the confidence you should have had where I was like, what am I doing for John?

I'm a fucking athlete This size like I've been five seven since I was in sixth grade and I've been and you know Maybe I was 200 pounds, but I was like, okay. I was like, well, I'm gonna play fucking football and basketball I'm going pro and I quit drama in sixth grade cuz I was like, yeah, dude. I'm a fucking job I'm a cool jock now, but I remember like it is it is being a little ass kid and being like I Want to be on stage, you know, it's so it's so fun I want to go back there cuz there's this for the Cuz I want to get a little more about like you as a little kid because that's fascinating because you must have been also just big as hell from

the jump right? Not till like I had a crazy growth spurt between freshman and sophomore year. I was like starting like maybe fourth fifth grade I got really chubby but I was short and then I worked at a Boy Scout camp in Catalina Island. Oh, nice. Catalina, very nice. Catalina wine mixer. Yeah, so I was there for six, seven weeks or something like that.

And while I was gone working at a camp, I grew seven inches. In a fucking six week span? I came home, my mom started bawling. She was like, my boy! She was freaking out. My brother Sean, who I had given, I hadn't seen him for a couple years,

he walked up to me and introduced himself. My older brother. The camp got shut down. They were putting HGH in the burners. Dude, that's a humongous kid. Dude, that's fucking nuts. So yeah, so like I had like just crazy deep red stretch marks all of a sudden and all this stuff.

Did that hurt? You're going through like a- Oh, I remember- A werewolf transformation. Exactly like that. Like, ah! I remember, so I don't remember almost anything other than a sunburn I got, a real bad sunburn

that I'll remember. And then I remember laying in the tents at Night and just rubbing my legs and I remember the guy the guy next to us Next to me had a playboy that was like under his pillow and I saw it So like I snagged that and at like two in the morning. I'm like rubbing my legs Jesus dude, that's not going like an inch a week. That's fucking nuts. That's fucking insane. It was super painful.

But before that, you were just like a chubby kid who was like very into drama. Yeah. And how do we get 10 siblings that are like religious? No, not really. No, my mom had a rough childhood. And so like when she started having kids, she just like wanted all of them. And then when that, so like when she started having kids she just like wanted all and then when that so like my mom was told she couldn't have any more kids and then she got pregnant with me

oh wow and then had me and then adopted three more wow you know and so like my mom was just like always just trying to take in everybody which is where all my confidence came from like i'd be the chubby kid like i'm Augustus gloop Like pinch my cheeks. Yeah, tell me I could do anything and so like that's really where it came from It was like I just believed her. I do whatever you know what you might I mean did everybody had to have bunk beds There's no way Question so so when when I was getting into high school and we'd moved back to Watsonville, we lived in a three-bedroom house

and we only had electricity there for the first 30 days. Oh my God, dude. So this is the craziest thing. Looking back as an adult, like my dad made good money. He worked for a great company and like Quinn Caterpillar, like Caterpillar the Tractors and stuff. My dad was like a really smart engineer worked on all that kind of stuff and like then started

working on what's it called when you lose power and the power generators generators and stuff for like hospitals or prisons and all that kind of stuff so he was a smart guy really needed made money, and we were broke. Like, had none. Did he have a second family with eight kids? No. What happened is he had a wife that spent everything faster than he could make. And so I remember we had no power for three years until,

like, well, on the weekends, my dad would drive home. You ever seen those white dogs that have? Did they have you in a big like wheel running to fucking power the house? Let it come in the barbarian, pushing it around. Yeah. I'm running the dishwasher, heave, heave. If you, on the road you'll see like a caterpillar truck

drive by, it's a big white truck and you'll see it's got like a little crane on it. All of those trucks have little generators. So on the weekends we would plug that into the house and we would have like maybe the TV or whatever like sometimes if we didn't run anything the hot water heater would work you know. Yeah. It was like that forever. But like it sounds so crazy now. But you don't know any better. In the moment man we were making those movies and I was having fun and we were doing WrestleMania on the trampoline like all that shit like playing baseball with every Apple in your chair, right?

Yeah, I don't think I've ever had as much fun as I did when we were dirt poor for sure Yeah, especially when you're a kid. You really have no ref frame of reference Yeah, you know and it's like I don't know. What was the school like did they did they let you know you were poor at school? Yeah Well in high school, yes, because in high school, I'm from Watsonville and if you know Santa Cruz Watsonville is like Eastside like well not not New York Eastside. It's like LA it's a it's the lower end of the Probably financial pool of the counter and I went to school in Aptos. Like I got in trouble in Watsonville and I had to go to Aptos high and Aptos is the

wealthiest area in Santa Cruz. And so like I remember all these kids. I remember this girl. It's got its families whose dad like it's the guy who invented that shitty like Sherpa hoodie. dad like it's the guy who invented that shitty like Sherpa hoodie. It's like the drug. That's that's the number one drug drug. In Santa Cruz that's the number one money makers like Rasta hats and those black like posters. Yeah. Black light hemp posters.

Yeah. It's a lot of like if you're kind of like an old school liberal and you made a ton of money and you retire That's one of the spots to go. Yeah, and um, it's pretty hippie dippy town from what I know I loved it. Like yeah, it was so I I first place I left slugs The right yeah, the UCSC slugs. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's an awesome mascot and um, like it was like first left I went to arkansas for school, it was, like, first left, I went to Arkansas for school, and it was, like, traveling back in time. Like, it was crazy to me that, like, like, there was a club that we used to go to called Curtis,

and the guys on the team said that was the Black Club. And so, like, literally, like, it was almost like it was, like, going into the 50s. It was, like, coming from California, I was, like, not used to that. You're like, this is ridiculous. I mean, at least you can run the lights in the black club. At least you guys have a refrigerator that works. I was like the mascot of the black club. It's always the best when you're a big white dude and you're the only white dude there.

Oh, it's awesome. Yeah. You know, folks, I wasn't always living the glamorous lifestyle of a Playboy international comedian, actor, podcaster. You know, I had to make those dollars stretch back in the day, boy. I had a little money and some apps, and I would need it quick, and I would need my money fast,

and sometimes I could hit with these processing fees, where it would take an extra Three or four days just to get my money. I didn't have that time Early on I was an adopter and I still am to this day of cash app. They don't got none of that bullshit We're talking get your money fast safe easy I swap back and forth whenever I want to throw a little something to my you know know, my brother just had a kid. I want to get the little guy something nice. I cash out my bro a little couple coins. Get the boy some diapers.

Get him some formula. Uncle Stavie's got him. Cash app coming right through and direct. It's safe, easy, fast way to send, receive, and transfer money to family and friends you get started so fast I thought there was a big barrier to entry. There's none just enter your phone or email. No bank Necessary no bank account needed. We'll go straight through that no waiting your money shows up right away. That's what I love I sent my brother a couple dollars my little nephew. He's got a new tracksuit that afternoon You know what I'm saying and it's secure and safe cash app has your back if you're about to send money to somebody sketchy

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You went to play football in Arkansas? Yeah, I went to, I ended up, so before my senior year, this is a lot. No, I love, I mean, if you want to. Yeah, I don't mind, I don't mind. Before senior year, I love it. I don't mind. I don't mind. Before senior year, my dad was schizophrenic and

he had a lot of issues, a lot of different stuff. And him and my mom split. You didn't have too many responsibilities. Even if it was a sound mind, he would go fucking crazy. You're plugging in a fucking extension cord to make tea on the weekends. He had a lot going on. You know what's funny is you were smart enough senior year and it all went haywire. So I ended up being homeless for about three years and then bounced around and tried to

figure stuff out. So this was 18 to 21 kind of? Yep. Dennis Rodman, same thing, Dennis Rodman. Yeah, he was homeless in that. And then he started playing Juco. And then he went from homeless to junior college. I think he also had a growth spurt, I wanna say. Yeah, he did.

He was like 6'1 when he had college or something. It's crazy. He had a ton of similarities to that. Dennis Rodman's a man, too. So yeah, bounce around it. I just made a bunch of mistakes. And then I actually, I was done with football. I had quit. I had laughed. I won made a bunch of mistakes. And then like, I actually, I was done with football. I had quit.

Choked a coach maybe or something like that. Flip it. Anyways. Flip the team bus. We're moving forward. You're gonna call me off guard there. Sorry man. Just an educated hunch.

So I got a job. I moved back to Santa Cruz and considered myself a coke dealer for like two months. Oh, hell yeah, dude. And it was silly and stupid and that stuff like it goes. I mean, I got to be honest for where you were at the time being huge being in Santa Claus. Like if there's place to deal like for for your circumstances that's not a horrible like looking looking at the math and being like and it helps to be huge because it's like how much do I owe you for this eight balls like $500.

Yeah and it's a hippie town it's like it'd be different if you were like a coke dealer in like a major city. Right. Totally totally different different vibe. Honestly, I'm glad you didn't keep doing it, but it wasn't the worst idea. Let's give you some credit. Some bad things came out of it. Yeah, I'm sure some bad stuff happened. I remember doing some stupid stuff. It's a natural byproduct of all that stuff that happens.

This guy's bound to happen, I think. Yeah, so I left, I realized I needed to get out of Santa Cruz, so I moved, my dad had just had another child with someone else. And him and my mom were back together and raising her now. Yeah, that was his issue. I just go out, clear my head, have another kid.

A lot, a lot. Like I said, I'm leaving a lot out too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so I moved back in with them and just weaned myself like completely. I just, it out too. Yeah. And so I'm, I'm, I moved back in with them and just weaned myself like completely. I just no rehab, no nothing. I just cut everything. I was on a lot of pills at the time to football really got me into pills and I stacked backer board outside of Reno for about a year, which in, in,

now we've went from fairy tale to Johnny Cash song. I was stacking backboards in Reno for a year. Fresh off pain pills, backboards in Reno, dude. Truly a mythological life that you've led. That's crazy. So I did that and I was, I was like about just, just about a year deep. And I got a phone call from a buddy of mine who was going to school at Western Oregon University. And he was like,

man, the coach here says you've got eligibility. Well, nice. And I was like, for real? And he's like, yeah, he's gonna pay for your school. Get out here. So I took my twin mattress from my house. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I tied it to my roof.

I broke it on the way up. Yeah. I snapped it in half. I drove from Reno on the way up. That's after the half. I drove from Reno all the way up the five, all the way into Salem, Oregon, and got off there and headed east, west. And stayed, I finished school at Monmouth at Western Oregon.

And I was just really appreciative. They gave me an opportunity. And that's like where football ended for me. And so this was a super long way to get back into. But it was huge. It was huge to like kind of get you just a little stability. Yeah.

A little like. I had a place to live. I had food. Yeah. Like to me, that was everything. And then I could kind of, you're not living off of crazy momentum. Yes.

You know, when shit starts rolling and you don't take a moment to step back, like you can really end up in some spots for sure For sure. No, it's crazy. I mean, I definitely I mean That and your life feeling like your life is being dictated by forces outside of you is a really scary thing So that that sounds like it, you know, it was even if even though you like It made you get pill, you know addicted to pills What in the beginning it's like football you know sounded like a nice little salvation and just some

regularity and then from there you were kind of is that where the strongman stuff yeah so just the pills thing really funny when i first started coming off pills i was in my college dorm and this is in arkansas where's this i don't want to say okay yeah we don't have to say And this is an Arkansas. Where's this? I don't want to say. Okay. Yeah, we don't have to say. We were in a college dorm. Yeah. College dorm somewhere in the continental United States. Could have been Hawaii or Alaska. We'll give it all 50 states and hell. We'll throw in Puerto Rico. Maybe one of the hemispheres. Yeah. Yeah. So I was in a dorm, Yeah.

in a college dorm and I'm coming off and I remember I was laying in my, in my little bed, looking at the roof. And it was like moving and being weird. And I really having DTs like hard and the running back was my roommate and he goes, man, you jerking off over there. And then he opens the door to the dorm. He goes, he's in you jerking off over there Getting off having like fucking oxy withdrawals I mean, I getting off like pills with a roommate is a tough scene, dude, in a little dorm in

those plastic mattresses like those making ramen noodles on a hot plate trying to Alaska. They got brick. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Where you were. Yeah. There's a moose outside the window. For to answer the simple question you asked about an hour ago. No, no, no. I was bouncing at a club, the Catalyst. I was doing security for a lot of people, cube, snoop. It was sick.

And you're in your mid-20s here? Yeah, low 20s. I'm not even 20, 24 or something like that. OK. Yeah. And a buddy of mine was obsessed with strong man. Low 20s. I'm like, not even 20, 24 or something. Okay. Yeah. And a buddy of mine was obsessed with strong man. And he'd been trying to do it for like eight years. And he was always the guy that was like my backup or whatever on a football team. Sure. Damn. That's tough.

Especially because he wanted to be a pro strong man. Yeah. And I went pro in less than a year. Yeah. And then you married the woman he was in love with. No, his dad calls you and tells you how much he respects you. No, no, he's, he's, he's, he's got a lot of really cool qualities. I don't want him to feel bad if he sees this. Like he's the man and he helped me a lot. Like he taught me

everything. And when I first got started the first day I did a log press, which is like, if you know what a log press is, like we used to use trees, but now we use like a cylinder. Yes. I've seen those things. So we, I had the record in that for a while. And so I did that on the first day and I pressed it and I beat the amateur record by five pounds and I put it down. Now I looked at my buddy and I was like, was that any good? Get he goes, fuck out of here. Oh, that's brutal for that guy, but he's doing well. He's doing great.

Yeah. He's got, he's got a wife and he's doing great, man. He's living the normal life. Like, of course, yeah. That's the only thing is like success in these fields is still not good. You don't live a good life. Like it's so much better just being upper middle class.

Yeah. And have a consistent paycheck. Yeah. Insurance. Totally. A couple of, you know. How much does that log weigh? It depends. It depends. So my record, I broke the record in Australia with Arnold Schwarzenegger. He was like right there watching me. That must feel so cool.

It was badass. It was in kilos and I think it was like 477 in pounds, something like that. It's like 217 kilos or something like that. It might be off. Don't get mad at me, internet. It might be off by a few pounds. So. Eldest, do a little fucking producing, man. Check out fucking. Really quick too, since you brought him up. Everybody that comes on this show just goes on and on about how grotesque and crazy Eldis looks. I'm an avid listener. I listen while I train while I'm doing stuff so I don't watch. I listen. I've heard Eldis' voice a million times. I was expecting you to be so much more hideous. You just look like a normal dude, man. It makes me wonder. I think that's because of someone's messaging.

We've really painted a narrative here. hideous. You just look like a normal dude, man. Like someone's messaging. We really paid for the narrative here. If you look crazy, then what do I look like? No, you got much more exaggerated version of you. Yeah. You guys are members of the same tribe, but that's the thing. You're in. You're one of the literal world's strongest men and he's just a guy and you guys look similar. That's the issue. I think you look good rather than I was expecting. You look good. Way too many people tell me that they're like they're like oh eldest and there's gonna be like fat like stop. All right. That's like stop. That's about it. That would be the negative thing to happen to you wait till they're on the bus for a long time

You wait, you know what eldest that's fine I carry this I'm like I'm basically like god I'm like Jesus That I'm basically like Jesus in that, you know, I'm dying for every fat guy sins, you know, throw them all on me I'll be fat as shit I'll be short I'll be bald I will I will take these slings and arrows for the rest of you that's how I look at it yeah yeah they know not what they do they do they know not how they are no no I just said by accident I am like God I meant Jesus They make all those videos now about all the comedians. Yeah It's very funny to be that obsessed with like truly were some of the dumbest people on earth

Yeah, and there's people who's there's like a whole clips Ecosystem like there's like an entertainment tonight about dumb comedians on podcast pretty funny by the way I just want to say I'm not like God I said I'm like fat Jesus let me make that clear I have some humility. Dude, that's fun to be a thumbnail you tomorrow with love all around Yeah, maybe I'm the fat Antichrist that's true. That's a possibility There's nothing you know, there's that's there's something very powerful in Lucifer triple triple XL Lucifer in Lucifer. Triple XL Lucifer. Man, that's fun, dude. It's it's but yeah, it is fascinating

because I also just feel like just bouncing. There must have been guys who just like, do you get that your whole life where people just like are so insecure that they like try you to just be like, fuck this guy, you know, fuck the thing is just you

existing. And they take it as a personal slight that you're big. Yeah, for sure. Especially, so I got picked on a lot until I got good at football. Until junior year of high school, I was like, man, I had some really rough bullies. And actually, the guy who fucked with me the most

hung himself a couple of times. Oh, nice, dude. Oh nice dude. Crazy, crazy. But like he fucking tortured me. Holy shit. He was a scary motherfucker and like he would torture me. And unfortunately I became a junior and then I started acting like an asshole. Of course.

And then like. That's what happens. So you get people who get abused, it's like a cycle. Yeah, but luckily I caught that. By like senior year, like I started getting attention from girls and I started realizing like, like, cause I had all my sisters and all that stuff. I started realizing like me being silly and funny and nice

is like, that's my best attribute. Right, right, right. Being a jerk, like maybe the mean girls at school will laugh. but like you're not gonna play yes it's not gonna do anything and even if you do that heads not gonna be good no from the from popular girls in high school that unless they were really popular I guess I guess I'm trying to think about the right kind of you know what I take that back there were some girls I'm you know back in the day I well I don't know because then, you know back in the day I well I don't know cuz then all you know is what your friend your friends who got to get pussy said to you as as

Non-pussy getters in high school. All right. All I have is these unreliable narrators The guys who got the fuck everyone lied to and there was always like that one girl who was known as a whore just cuz she Kissed the guy She like hooked up with one guy. It's like fucking sluts. Life's ruined. Yeah, some girl gave a guy a head in middle school. You just only hear stories you think you're surrounded by the greatest sexual dynamos who ever walk the earth.

You only hear their side of the story. I remember one kid said he fucked seven girls in high school and I remember like, oh, it was like, it's like the Jaws snap zoom where I'm like, like, I haven't even fucking grazed the day by seven. Yeah, I'm down seven zero. I fumbled the kickoff and he returned it for a touchdown. The opening kickoff. There's 11 59 left in the first quarter. I'm down seven.

He fucked one girl seven times. You just counted it all toward seven times. You know, whatever I wonder what he's up to. He's a good guy. I think he joined the armed services the armed forces respect Thank you for your service. He's brought which means Well this good job man, oh Folks I've been away from my home for two months, over two months on the Dream Boat Tour, and I am happy to finally make this spring

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Bouncing, oh yeah, for sure. So guys at first when I started bouncing would try and check me. I think there's a look, like a guy's gotta look if he hasn't bounced for a while, maybe he's just too busy with his eyes or whatever, I don't know. But like, at first.

Oh, it's like a projecting thing. It's just like a vibes thing. Not even size. I think, because it stopped. Like, I mean, it probably happened for like a month or two, but I was at like that- That's still insane, because you were like this, like what size are we talking about?

I was probably bigger than I am now. Yeah, a little bit bigger. That's nuts that someone's like, yeah, that guy doesn't look confident bouncing. I'm gonna try and swing at him. Well, I mean, I've had guys, I had an off-duty cop have it happen. That makes no other sense.

This one time we were, we would have shows, so like in the back we had a rap group, I can't remember. It was like a Mexican rap group. I can't remember. It was like, um, uh, a Mexican rap group. I can't remember. And then in the front we had a, a 15 and up dance party. Oh God. And one of the guys from the rap show party, you can't be putting up and coming rappers near 15 and up club club nights. And so it ended up being the most epic brawl I've ever been a part of. Oh man.

Spilled out to the streets. Jesus. A bunch of guys from seaside drove out for the brawl. So like there was A fight going on so long that word gets out and people commute to it. From Santa Cruz to seaside, that's a drive. Send word to the cavalry.

Look to the east at dawn. So if you know downtown Santa Cruz. Somebody's trying to stop us from fucking underage children. Get the baseball bats in a van full of our strongest friends. So that downtown road, it's Main Street and then there's Pacific. And literally the whole block, the entire street was packed full of people brawling. And one of our big rules was like, don't go out. Like you're secure, you're safe here. You step past this door.

We can't do anything for you. No insurance, no nothing. And cops are on you when you're a bouncer. Like we had to wear gloves after a while because they would check our knuckles. So I'm standing there in the doorway and I'm sitting there thinking like this, like, who do you think you are? We're the only ones who get to beat the fuck out of whoever we want. That's our job. They were just jealous. So I'm standing in the doorway and I'm watching this and I'm like, wow, this is gonna be the craziest thing

I've ever seen. Yeah. And the guy who got me into Strongman, in the middle of it, I see him just come up like a movie out of people and he goes, wah! And he's built like me. He's a big fucking dude.

And I was like, oh fuck. Yeah, gotta get in there. Yeah, we're in there. And like, I'm literally like, one after. Yeah, you gotta get in there. And we're in there, and like, I'm literally like, one after the other, after the other, after like, people behind you, people all around you. Yeah, I mean that's insane. A block long brawl is insane.

All the members of IIICP had you surrounded. They were fucking bronzes. Oh fuck dude. Yeah, that one was the wildest, but like Hank Williams Jr. We had a bunch of, I'm not going to say which biking group, but a bunch of bikers. All his rowdy friends, let's say. They were there for Monday night. And we had a very physical altercation, a very, very physical altercation.

And then the next night I'm working the bar, there's no show and I'm working by myself. So and the catalyst, when you go in, there's two doors, and then like, if the venue's open, you go underneath, and it used to be an old bowling alley, and that's where the shows are. If there's no show, you go up the stairs, there's a bar. So I'm sitting at the top of those stairs, everything else is locked,

and I'm sitting there by myself the night after a pretty rough brawl, and I hear 200 motorcycles. Oh shit. Oh my God dude. I'm sitting here by my fucking self. Oh my God. My ass like fell out of the seat.

I was like, I knew, like I think Goosebumps talking about it right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I knew in my head, this was the end. Like in my head I was like, don't you go out like a fucking pussy. Like don't, like this is the only thing you can control. Go out like a man. Open your fucking eyes and go out like a fucking pussy? Yeah, like don't like this is the only thing you can control Go out like a man open your fucking eyes and go out like a man. I would have been like how wide are those vents?

Is there a ladder? I would try to find a fat woman to put my clothes on Literally me a bartender and like one guy. So you hear 200 motorcycles pulled up and I'm like freaking out. I'm sitting at the top of the stairs and they start filing in just all these vests, all these sleeveless shirts, all these bald dudes. And then in the middle of them,

this little old dude just weasels his way between them and kind of pushes through and he stands at the bottom of the stairs and he looks up at me and he goes like this. I'm like, oh fuck. Wild. I walked down the stairs, like literally like terrified. Yeah. And he was like, were you here last night?

And I was like, yes, sir. He goes, were you a part of what happened? I don't remember exact words. Were you a part of the situation that happened? I was like, yes, sir. And he goes, Billy, Tom, call these guys out, stand up here. And they all come up with like their tail tucked

between their legs and their heads down. He goes, you got something to say? They all apologize to me. Wow. Every one of them did. Apologize to me. What the fuck? He pulls out a business card and he goes,

anytime you have a problem, call me. Wow. Bro, I'm telling you like, I floated back up the stairs. I was like, I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it. And you're right. That was the right thing. Cause if you did show cowardice, they probably would have fucked you up.

You're a stand up guy, literally. It's always like the little old guy in the gang who's like the one you need to be the most afraid of. It's like he commands all these soldiers. I really like in that moment, I saw I was like, I'm going to nice me at least. There's going to be a ceremonial ear cutting or something. So this is because it's like, you know, you start doing

strongman, but it's not like it doesn't seem to me like the thing that immediately starts paying big bucks, does it? Like you still have to bounce probably, or what are you doing at the time, or can you train? Like how, what are even the economics of something like that? Most guys never make money in strongman. Right, yeah.

Most, and that's all they tell you when you start it, everyone's like, you're never gonna make it. Insane. You know? I knew I could use it as a platform. Like I didn't, I never thought that I was gonna be the strong, like maybe up until like my rookie year at Worlds, I thought maybe I could win.

But then after that, I realized I wasn't gonna be able to do what it took to win, but I could totally use this as a platform. I could totally use this to do what I want to do. Cause just like, I mean, east bound and down, he said it so fucking right. Like I wasn't trying to be the best at working out. I wanted to play real sports.

You know? I really felt that way. So you were just like, fuck man. I mean, I'll fucking lift this shit. But like, yeah. That's the upside of like, if you don't, if, if like, say you try strong and you don't make it, at least you're still strong as fuck. Yeah. That is true. Like as long as you don't

fuck yourself up. Like if you try comedy and you flame out, then you're just not funny. Yeah. And you're just a fucking loser. Yeah. You hear that? Don't even do it folks. You hear that? Don't even do it folks. Yeah, that's yeah, that is that that's interesting to have that perspective of just being like that. Fuck it. I guess I'll just do it. And then you were fucking good at it. Yeah. And then because like is it is there more to it than the because we were talking a little bit. It's like I didn't realize you know that you were going to like foreign countries and there's way more than just like because in my head, it's just the ESPN. Like, did you travel a bunch of cool places?

Was there money in that or was it, again, just experiential or what was it? Exactly. There's a little bit of money. Was there some Sultan? Like, did you have to fight his strongest, strongest guy? I got it. Uday Hussein's. He had a fucking Mongoloid that you had to wrestle. Baby Ruth. Yeah, no, I, I, I think the most money I ever made from a competition was like

two grand. Wow. I think about two, maybe 28,800. What the fuck? So. To just fuck your body, to do insane things with your body, objectively should not be doing. So I think maybe when I got top 10 at Worlds twice, I think that maybe one of those times I made three. Yeah. Maybe. I might be off by like a grand. Now what are the world's strongest men groupies like?

They must be women that really, you know, they must run the gamut. Some sturdier gals maybe. Those are there for sure. I think that goes along with anybody when you're this size, right? Like you don't even have to lift weights. It's always like a big guy. For sure. Security and all that kind of noise. But there's something kind of in, you know, in women's brains and much of it's like, you know, height really does. You make people's lives easier. Like certain guys could never be five seven, for example,

eldest. I'm just saying certain guys wouldn't certain guys wouldn't be able to live, you know to survive But so I get you it was more like you were just always strong as hell And there's a there is there's definitely a type of woman that's gonna be attracted that whether you're a strong man or not There's there's definitely strongman groupies. Yeah sure that are specific to strong man. So fast. Um, yeah It's like it's like well, it's not dangerous enough being a woman. What I remember getting a message from some girl a long time ago, like in Canada, and she was like saying she was scared of me, but it's like a roller coaster. Like, yeah, she still wants to ride it.

So like that, that's the kind of girl like a like a right gothh, like had problems growing up type of, a girl who goes to church and pays her taxes. She wanted the literal werewolf from Twilight and was like, I'm just gonna get as close as I can. Yeah. Nothing wrong with a nice goth. That's, there's a little, sounds like that Venn diagram

is a little bit with comedians. Yeah. See? Whenever you do- God is pretty good though. That's a god. That's that's a nice one to have in the in the groupie canon I just I just was wondering like does it attract a certain type of person? But you can be surprised to you never know like there's just like a normal girl who had a big dad, you know I don't think it's ever been just a like your attractive thing though.

I don't know. Right. It's got to be some psychology trick. Right. Like in high school it was, oh, this guy's going to be a college football player. And then the girls like me. Oh, that's hilarious. And then after that it was like, oh, he's going to do this or that or whatever.

You know, it was always something else. Hey, come on. You're cute, man. Don't say that about yourself. I mean, we fucked. Yeah. I didn't think you liked it that much. Just moaning a bunch. That's fucking hilarious, dude.

Yeah. I'll give you another bouncing one. Please, please. I was at that same spot at the top of the stairs in the Catalyst and at the bottom, one of the things I left out is there's a pizza counter. Nice. Sounds like a great spot. It was awesome. I loved working there. I wish I never got fired for selling tickets.

You were selling comps directly in your own pocket. Oh yeah. I used to make 5 G's weekend all the time, man. You can't do that for long. But I was a stupid kid. Whoa, this golden goose keeps laying eggs. It's a not sold out show. Yeah. It was silly.

And one of my best friends who I played Juco ball with was the head of security too. So like he caught me twice and was like, bro, come on, come on. And then they caught me one time really bad. Like 30 people walked in with fake tickets. Oh man. But I was sitting up top. They caught me one time really bad like 30 people walked in with fake tickets But I was sitting up top. I was sitting up top of those stairs and That's fucking awesome This is fucking that people are Venmoing elders for patreon links

Cash app me I'll get you in through the loading dock at the shows. I was like, yeah, they're delivering pizzas. All right. You got the empty boxes. So you make them bring up these and you'd eat it. It wouldn't give us any. Some of that background stuff for shows is some of the craziest, funnest and most awkward stuff. Like you're talking about getting people through the back ramp and stuff. So I remember I was, it was slightly stupid.

I was doing security for it and they're fun. So much fun, really cool guys. And a couple of them were single at the time. I don't know if they're single now and I'm not going to say names, but they were like, we need some girls. So I walk over and there's these four girls together. And then I approached them and I was like,

hey, you guys, I don't know if you want to meet the band. They're all super excited. And then the guy taps me on the shoulder and he goes, we just want three. Oh no. So I had to look at these girls. Who can carry this stone the farthest? Yes.

You know what sucked? You know what really sucked is I did it. I was like, okay, you three and the other girls, why not me? And I was like, I'm sorry. She's just, oh, so I'm the ugliest? And I was like, okay, you three and the other girls, why not me? And I was like, I'm sorry. She's also on. So I'm the ugliest. And I was like, no, I think you're very beautiful.

He literally comes back and he goes, why don't you come to? Wow. He made you look like the fucking asshole. And then who knows if you just invite them all, they're not all going to fuck. Maybe you got the whole night. She kept saying, oh, you didn't even want me back here. She kept saying that. I felt so bad. I I felt bad there's a lot of shit like that so yeah it's so weird it's like you know what's one extra that's not a problem it's a girl you're a band yeah I get sucked off by two of them that's the problem with stoners man that's the problem with stoners

who was a cocaine band he was like give me give me 800 women, I'm gonna fuck them all. You know? He felt bad. So he came over and he got the drumstick from the show and he goes, I filed it under D so you know where to put it. It's a drumstick. And he gave her the drumstick

because he felt bad about it. Yeah, yeah. They were cool. They were freaking awesome. Like so much fun and that whole venue. So like that, I was gonna say I was at the top of those steps and I was looking down and we had a reggae band going and in the front foyer by those the pizza kitchen there was these two

just blasted drunk chicks that were like 50s 60 years old and one of her titties keeps plopping out and she like drops her pizza on the floor a couple times it's just a mess and there's these big I think there and one of her titties keeps plopping out and she drops her pizza on the floor a couple times and picks it up and it's like, it's just a mess. And there's these big, I think they were Samoan, they could have been Tongan. I lived in Samoa for two years, so I feel like I'm allowed to make that mistake.

I know it's very upsetting to not know if it's Tongan or Samoan. Most of the people listening definitely know what the fuck you're talking about, that's for sure. We got a lot of big OUCE listeners. Nice, nice. So I lived in America, Sam more for a few years. I love it there. But I'm pretty sure they were Samoan and there was like four giant older dudes in their forties all wearing Hawaiian shirts, just looking really nice, nice gentlemen, nice hair and

everything, but they were sick and they start making fun of the girl or whatever. So I go down there and one of my buddies who was new fired off hot and said something. I don't remember what he said, but the oldest, the silver haired guy just opens his fucking big meat hook, slaps him across the face. And he goes down and he's snoring on the way to the ground.

He's like, like on the way. That's awesome. As for them. An open hand slap, dude. That's a meaty paw to do that to somebody. Put him down asleep before he hit the ground. A slap to the shadow realm. And that guy didn't even look like he's a fighter. He's just a dude. Like he didn't go there coming to fight. You know when a guy comes to a bar wanting to fight, he didn't want this. It just presented itself. Yes. Yes. And so like that, we ended up, that's a so much more dangerous guy that the guy that just in an instant can

snap into that as opposed to like a guy is like not thinking about it at all for sure. And those guys too, the guys that have that energy where they're looking for it, everybody feels it. Yeah. You're on point with that. This guy. Yeah. He caught us off guard because he was smiling when he did it. Caught us off guard and we got, I think that was the only bouncing fight I feel like I lost. Because it was like four on one until a couple more guys got there.

But like, I went home thinking like, I'd love that fight. Four tongs. Four tongs, that's a rugby team basically. You can't beat yourself up over that one. Yeah, I hung in there for a good couple swings. Yeah. Folks, one of the main reasons I got into podcasting

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and important safety information. And we thank BluChu for sponsoring the podcast. Why were you in American Samoa? How long did you live there? My old man, I don't know exactly how, but he got a job. There's a trolley that goes on the native side. It goes from the bottom of the mountain to the top. So not the side, like there's one side of the island that's like hotels and nice and everything. We lived in a hut with the village. And so like, he just basically for two years kept that trolley running so

people could go to the other side of the mountain to work. It was crazy like I don't remember a ton of it I was like it was four or five and six or something like that. And so like I remember like on Wednesday nights the only time we ever had TV was Wednesday nights the Army Channel played wrestling and like I remember being so bored that we like would watch geckos crawl on the walls and stuff like that. But like, you know, I don't remember. While your dad's working on the trolley. Another very weird job. Crazy, right?

Yeah. I got a dollar on light green. The trolley administrator. Well, dude, you've lived a wild ass life. We haven't even really got, you got to come back. Obviously we'll get more into it, but it sounds like you have a lot of wisdom to give our fucking listeners. Oh, hell yeah.

Sounds like you're a fucking, a man who's as wise as he is strong. Oh my gosh, I hope not. Eldis, what do we got here little buddy? Play us a couple of calls. Hi Bobby, Eldis, and this is me. I have two questions for you. The first one is, is it weird to attend a comedy show by yourself?

I'm pretty introverted and I've always had a smaller group of friends. And I'm usually okay with going to things by myself, but I didn't really want to sit in a 2000 seat, something theater by myself. So I, I was too nervous to go to your or about to get to the dream. Yeah. Sure. So yeah, it's a good to go to a comedy show by yourself. My second question is, I think this question has been asked before, but only by male listeners. I'm a woman in a larger metropolitan metropolitan area in her late 20s. So a lot of my girlfriends are, have fiancees or husbands or boyfriends or whatever,

and I'm single. So I'm at the age where everyone wants to do everything with their husband or their boyfriend or fiance. How do you deal with getting to your late 20s, early 30s? And nobody wants to spend time with just their friends. Like one of these girls, one of these spend time with just their friends. Like one time the girls, they always want to drag their fiance or their boyfriend or their husband along and I don't always want to hang out with them. Yeah. So I respectfully tell my friends

that I don't want to hang out with your boyfriend and your fiance or your husband. Like can we just have girls time? Or is this just part of getting older? So yeah, let me know. And hopefully I'll see you in your next tour. Bye. Damn, I mean, that is tough. Tale as old as time.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Classic stuff. And yeah, she's right, it is mostly guys. So it's refreshing to hear a woman be like, I don't want to fucking hang with you. Well, her first question is an easy answer, which is no, it's not awkward to go to a comedy show by yourself. Yeah, for real.

I love going to movies by myself, I love popping into shows. That's the nice thing about doing something by yourself is you decide if you're not feeling it. Obviously some of these are like a comedy show. If you come to one of our shows, you're gonna like it, you're gonna have a good time. And especially a comedy show, if you come to one of our shows, you're gonna like it, you're gonna have a good time. And especially a comedy show is particularly easy because it's like, once

it starts, it's just a fucking comedy show all the way through. There's no like, interacting, there's no doing anything. Even in fact, it's like, you know, going with people. I mean, obviously it's fun because you can talk afterwards, but it's all, it's not the actual experience that's fun to do. It's not like going to fucking Benihana by yourself It's like it's like, you know, that's it's totally it's totally fine I mean, I remember back in the day every place when we did come town tours Every fucking comedy club was like we've never sold more single tickets Was like that that's a badge of honor though.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We were bringing the community together. It seems like it's all the focus is off you too. Totally, totally. Like you can relax and you don't have to be worried about your nervousness or anything. The lights go down, a focus is up on stage. 100%, I guess particularly if you're a nervous person,

maybe you're worried about crowd work and getting yeah and like, you know If you go to a shitty comedian, right? Oh that can be an issue But like I think I think I would have a lot I actually did talk to a guy who was I was positive was there by himself in The first San Francisco the first show in San Francisco and it was like it didn't come up But even if it did I wouldn't have been fucking mean about it whatever but yeah definitely go to the show don't let that don't let I like having little experiences by myself whether that's like you know going to a fucking museum or just doing shit like that it's nice

and again being in control of it is pretty cool where there's not you don't have to like get everybody's fucking everybody to weigh in. The second question is a little bit of like it is a little of like, yeah, you just got to grow up a little bit. But your friends also it the second one is a classic meet in the middle compromise situation where it's like, look, there's going to be some vegetables, which is a group dinner. We have some cabbage you have to eat to like before you can have the like wings of just getting fucked up and gossiping with the people you actually give a fuck about. Right. Like. But this is part of growing up. I remember being like 20 in your early to mid 20s. And when somebody would have like would like spring their girlfriend on you to be like, are you fucking kidding me, dude? You're a fucking piece of shit. You don't even fucking care, right? But it's like, this-

She doesn't even like Star Wars. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you fucking joking, dude? Beer pong is an even numbers game. And you're throwing off the math. I bring her around. Oh, you're gonna play with her. You're gonna play with her.

She's your partner. Oh yeah, cause she's such a good shooter. All right, cool man, sucks. She fucking sucks at beer pong, dude. I've been practicing all week. She keeps trying to bounce it. I'm gonna sw swap that shit every time So yeah, you have to like but I think it's maybe a little kid

I think all this is a little connected where it's like false barriers. Yeah, I think I think there's a bit of a false Psychological barrier to like getting your friends to hang out They're not gonna want to because they have their boyfriends or whatever But like if my girlfriend wants to go hang out with her friends, there's no explanation needed. Yeah, it's great. Yeah, and so look, might some of your friends be in weird relationships? That's a separate issue.

But for the most part, it's like, and we give the example, I hang out with elders all the time, obviously too much probably, but I'll hang out with elders, I'll hang out with his wife. And it's like, you know what I mean? I'll hang out with you, I'll hang out with his wife. And it's like, you know what I mean? Like, I'll hang out with you, I'll hang out with your girl. It's like, and it's also a thing of getting to know these people. I think, you know, there is something annoying about friends that just want to

spring, they want to bring a significant other into the rotation immediately. It's like, they got to earn their way in. Like, at this point, Elvis' wife is a good friend of mine. I would hang out with her alone, you know? But that took, I mean, you guys have been together for years, right? That doesn't just happen overnight. And it's like the same thing with other people's... It's almost like you have to...

It's like you date the person's friend where there's levels of friend that a significant other becomes. They don't need to be in the group chat just yet. But like there's levels. Exactly. This is a real respectful bros podcast, asterisk real quick. You could have so just made a bad joke

about your buddy's wife and you just slid right past it. Nobody else did. And it was like, asterisk. Well, we respect, imagine being the woman that's married to eldest. Your life is already a nightmare. Oh, no. My sibling brought it up.

You lived with Stav for a year and a half. We were roommates. I was roommates with his wife. Yes, she's been through enough. I want to say, too, about this. With this, I think for her, she should feel like her friends, if they are her friends, your friends should put in the same effort to give you alone time that you should

to learning to be friends with their new partner. Absolutely. And that's key, that's key, is that it is like a give and take of like, you don't wanna be like, every time they ask to hang out, and if their boyfriend is coming, are you like, no? Cause that is like, if they invite you to like four group hangs and you say no every time,

then they might even start to think like, does she just not even like me? You know what I mean? You have to exactly, it's a give and take. It's part of getting older. It's also hard because, and I've definitely been here when it's like when you're the fucking single one of the crew and it's like, it reinforces your insecurities of like and that might be happening her on some level where it's like you're a little resentful

Everybody's happy, but you everybody what oh you're having such a good time with your fucking But what about me and it's like I definitely went through that when I was younger and then you mature you realize like no It's actually good when your friends are with someone they love Yeah, you're happy for them and hey, if they're a little annoying, you don't got to see them every time. You can skip half the group hangs, but you should still see them, you still make an effort. And your friends should be able to be like,

oh, let's just have girls nights. I had that in my 20s with my friends where I was like, oh, I thought it was going to be the four of us living in this apartment forever. And I was like, you just get over it eventually. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. was like, you just get over it eventually. It's like, yeah, my friends are growing up. Absolutely. All my friends with homes had that, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you want a lawn and property you own? Is that it? You want to start a family? That era of being- We just bought a hookah, man. Come on, you're supposed to hang out.

We split this four ways. I'm doing two hoses at once. Yeah, I guess we bought the four hose hookah for nothing. I could've gotten a single one. You're not respecting my life plan. I got enough peach shisha to last us six months. You fucking piece of shit. Yeah, sorry. You gotta.

File this one under, it's all part of growing up. I mean, it's not to dismiss the question or anything, but it's like, yeah, you're just going to adjust to a new social dynamic of other people being around. But at those gatherings and get togethers and shit, the dudes are gonna break off and they're gonna have their chat. The girls are gonna break off

and have their girl time. Hey, here's the other thing, the ones you don't wanna hang out with, they don't want to hang out with you. You both have a respectful dance for your friend's sake. Yes. And then eventually you might form some kind of grudging respect that true friendship does come out of. That's how this works. That's a great point. So yeah, good luck. Good luck. We're rooting for you. And come to a comedy show. And come to a comedy show. If we happen to come by, you know,

tell us, we'll even put you on the list. Oh, what the hell's going on? Is it time to? Keep it twisted. Yes it is. Wow. Keep it twisted with an it is. Wow. Keep it twisted with an ice cold twisted tea.

I got half a month to crack this bitch right now. Psych? That'd make you hard wouldn't it you little goblins? Well that's not what it's time for because we still have a show. We are in the green room here. And I will be cracking this twisted T post show,

but right now, yeah, somebody didn't plan things out well, and we're doing ads before the last weekend of the tour. JP, not again. Yeah, not again, dude. I do pull all the strings here at Stavi's World, and this was one of my many faux pas. You gotta get your act together man. I am stepping down as the head of the Stavisworld podcast.

I'm designing indiscreet. A lot of people don't know that JP is the president and CFO. Puppet master. He's pulling all the strings. The twisted chief. Stavvy Baby Enterprise is a subsidiary of McDade Corp. Stav named me CEO, so like when all the financial crimes are uncovered, I'm the one who takes the hit and goes to jail.

I'm getting paid in stocks that are being run through three separate shell companies. Everything's in your mom's name You got a little office in Delaware But that's not why we're here folks we're here to discuss ice cold delicious twisted tea twisted beautiful beverage that gets my twisted prayer card Anyway, can't delini canto canto lini Beautiful beverage that gets my twisted. Prick hard. Anyway. Contellini. Conto-contellini. How do we not make that drop yet?

Contellini. Now tell me, Eldis, do we have a fucking question to soothe the minds of the twisted listeners out there? We have a woman who's in quite the twisted pickle. Let's see what she's got to say. To me, twisted questions are just normal questions. Oh, that's how twisted you are. Shit, dude.

Jesus Christ, McDade. McDade is a madman. I've said it before. I will say it again. And right now, you're probably all enjoying the McDade's Maniac series. Of course you are. You found out about Stavi's world through McDade's Maniac. We're the only podcast with eight separate sub podcasts concurrently running through its patreon

There's like the laziest way to start a podcast network Slightly different is its own show Everything it's just got a different title and sometimes we smoke weed. Anyway, I can't wait till Twisted Teeth is playing for its own sub patreon podcast. Hey, ears are open Twisted Teeth. Oh, I'm drinking the offer. Stavi's Twister Chasers. That's right. One of those souped up trucks driving through tornado alley. I love that. Looking for Twisters drunk driving.

Yeah, drunk driving. Looking for bitches drunk driving. And then we fuck them. No, no. Bang bus meets storm chaser. Bang bus meets storm chaser. OK, I'm back in. The twisted bus.

It's a money faucet. Yeah, oh yeah. So anyway. Line up that question for your video. But for the meantime, we'll just be answering questions. We won't be getting our dicks sucked in a yellow and blue conversion van. Well, I don't know, I guess our hurricane's happening. We haven't figured out exactly. Tornadoes. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, tornadoes. Go ahead. Hey, Sofi, eldest and like highly esteemed guest I'm sure I'm a, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, tornadoes. Go ahead. Hey, Savvy, Eldish, and like highly esteemed guests I'm sure I'm a fan of.

Sorry to bug you guys, but this is gonna be settle the debate question, please. And if I'm so lucky to have this be the twisted question of the week, I'd love to keep it twisted with y'all. So, okay. We're keeping it twisted. Here's my argument with my boyfriend right now.

Pause this. So he works full time. And then our agreement is I. Doesn't matter. Yeah, go ahead. So he works full time. And then our agreement is I stay at home, take care of our pets, do my wifely duties, make sure laundry is done,

like our laundry is done, like food is there. Do my wifely duties. You know I'm a good girlfriend. And then I also like come in with my own income. So she doesn't, I still pay like my half of rent. It's just, and then I like buy and resell things. I buy and resell vinyl, music. Those are really big right now. Buy and resell clothes.

But lately he has been kind of fed up with having things in our house. Like I have a dedicated closet to everything I have listed for sale. And he has been donating my things to Goodwill. It's that shitty boyfriend behavior because he's a good man. He's not English, he's his first language.

So like, I don't know what his thing is. English is not his first language? No, it's not his first language. An Englishman would never. Yeah. Oh, wow. You respect the British now? No, but just...

Interesting. Keep going, Elvis. There's a couple red flags here. A couple twisted ass little things going on here. There's a couple of math things that are not adding up, but we want to get more information on that. We're going to open up the twisted chocolate board. Twisted calculator.

We're going to get the twisted abacus out. It's that thing at the pediatric chalkboard. Twisted calculator. We're going to get the twisted abacus out. That thing at the pediatrician's office at the Beats. Yeah, we're going to do some math with the twisted abacus. I don't know what his thing is, and he doesn't hate me. He's a good man. He's a good boyfriend. He doesn't hate you, Jesus.

He doesn't hate me, but it feels like he hates me. Wait, she hit her hate. He donates my things to good will. I thought she said hit originally, but I don't know if she said hate just now. But it feels like he hits me, but he donates my things to Good Will, if that makes sense. And we got in an argument about it. Let's say she said hate. She must be saying hate.

She's not saying it feels like he hits her because she donates her stuff. I think that's hate. I think you're right. I think that's, hey, that's right. Good. I'm glad we really, I'm glad you did a thorough job vetting the question, Elders. Anyway. And then a few months later, which was like about a month ago before we flew to Japan, he donated a bunch of my stuff again that I had listed for sale.

And he, we're about to start a business together right now, like where I go live on this app and sell things for us. This bitch is doing a kick-off QVC. Why would I, I don't know. I told him, I was like, if you donated my things, she's on chat. Why would I want to invest more money into buying things with you if you've donated them already? And if you don't regret it and you stand by, don't need my things. Does that make sense? Yes. I don't know. and you stand by donating my things does that make sense? Yes. I don't know he's not a shitty boyfriend love y'all I put him onto the pod actually I took him we went and saw you saw the front row in LA um I took us out because I'm a good ass girlfriend okay I don't know guys we're trying and it's a big debate and it's not like breakup worthy but it's beef worthy and I need it settled titled. Thank you so much. Love y'all.

She's pissed. She's a super fan. She's dating somebody. Here's my decode on the situation. Please, let's see. I have some thoughts, but please. Flying to Japan, English not his first language. He's Japanese.

If the item doesn't spark joy, it's gone. Throw it out. Don't care if it's in your special closet, Marie Kondo. Marie Kondo. Damn. Got birds at the condo. You gotta throw that shit out. Don't care if it's in your special closet. Marie Kondo. Marie Kondo. Damn. Got birds at the condo. Fucking. You got to throw that shit out. Cultural thing. You got to kneel at the dinner table and you got to throw out your extra shit. See, I read it differently. I read it as Latino weeb. Interesting. That's Latino who loves to, who loves anime. Okay.

Because you got the, you got a little bit of the, let's say, old world with not respecting your girlfriend. So, you know what I mean? Like... He's clearing out the stuff from the closet because he's trying to make it a shrine to Goku. Yeah. He's putting his anime stuff, he's got swords and shit that he's trying to put in the closet. Okay. That could add up to the one question that I had.

No, we won't listen. For this twisted question, we will do no more race speculation. We're going to only keep it so twisted. He's clearly from Central Asia. He has a flat back of the head because of how he was laid in the crib and he lacks empathy. We're like, if he's Latino, I'm suspicious. But if he's Japanese, I have a cultural reverence for him. He is doing the honorable thing for his family.

You got to commit seppuku if you're running afoul of your husband. Maybe Yushu wasn't selling on Depop, he was it was either donated or fucking slices belly open For his ancestors. Now. Here's the thing is that so she said she contributes her income now This is the out of everything that's been said here The most insane thing was something that she glossed over was that at first? She's describing the way that they go about things. And it's like he works full time. She does housework, which I think is fine.

I think that's how she should. Like, that's totally okay if one person wants to do that shit. Stay at home boyfriend, stay at home girlfriend. Who fucking cares? 100%. That's the world is working in a way now where there's inequality is so great that if you have one person in your family who has a good job Everyone else should just fucking tend to them

Just something to think about anyway, but every family has a landlord. Yeah Literally it is the feudal model. I don't get any fucking turnips out of this shit. I just get back talk. I pay for their fucking houses, and all I got is sass for it. You should at least get a coat of arms. Yeah, I deserve a coat of arms. Anyway, but the craziest part that I

think you're also getting at is that, OK, great. You split duties. He works full time, whatever. You pay half the fucking rent. Where's this income coming from? You pay half the fucking rent. And you cook and clean and do all this shit. So that's number one is like, that seems kind of at odds, unless he also

unless he chips, let's say she pays her half the but that's does he still do half of the chores? Like to me, this is a little bit of a fucked up situation. He must be paying for all the groceries. Right. Good thing. Right. Maybe utilities, whatever.

Car bill. Car bill, whatever. Half is a lot, but I hear some clues like she's flipping shit. They live in LA. Is her, you know, even if it's a lot of income, is it coming from like eBay or something, is she like, you know? Yes. He's paying for that white infinity with the tinted windows.

We're coming up against the twisted race speculation ceiling. I'm honoring cultures. I'm honoring cultures. Sconsor ceiling. How much racial speculation can you do and still get the great amount amount of money? Against the twisted racial ceiling

Yes, eldest you're right that But dude, if she pays for half, even if her job is irregular. She's showing holes. Well, she might be, which is fine. That's also fine. She could be showing hole. That, to me, is actually more honorable than flipping leather jackets. Showing tits and hole is way harder. Well, actually, I don't know if it's harder, but you

have to do a lot more. Jacket arbitrage is pretty despicable. Yeah. Yeah, like people who go to thrift stores are like, ooh, this is worth $80. I don't want it, but I'm going to sell it. Like, I find it weird. It's like, a thrift store should just be a beautiful thing

where sometimes you get the greatest shirt you'll ever wear, and sometimes you get fucking fleas. Like you never know where you're gonna get. I do think it's been ruined a little bit by seeing fucking people scanning shit and buying shit and flipping it. It's like, I hate when things are overly curated. There's something to the mess of stumbling on a...

Like when we hit those DVDs in, fuck it, when I got the Incredible Haul in Birmingham. The Birmingham load they call it to this day. I bought like a Gladiator Blu-ray for a dollar. I could flip that. Huge win. I don't wanna flip it. Could you flip it?

What is that really worth? Not to hate on Gladiator, but. Are you fucking kidding me? A Braveheart Blu-ray? Oh, Braveheart. It's reverse drug dealing. You take the $1 single DVDs You package them together in a beautiful collection and you sell that for a markup to cover your shipping cost

Yeah, I mean look whatever I could have flipped the fuck you own That's that's neither here nor there the point is We respect women who show their tits more than women who sell Jackets from thrift stores and that that actually is true, by the way. That sounds like we're joking. And we were, you know, all, you know, whatever. Well, work is work, whatever. Even fucking flipping jackets, I guess, if you work hard enough.

Anyway, so I'm a little worried. I'm a little curious about the general dynamics because this what's happening here is this person, our friend who called in, has a grievance and feels like she's allowed to complain in an area where her boyfriend maybe hasn't even bothered to gaslight her yet. Well, it is. She said it was a settle the debate question. Okay. So it implies that she's discussed this before. But what I'm saying is it feels like she might have lost other debates that she's discussed this before. But what I'm saying is it feels like she might have lost other debates that she's actually mad about and letting it bubble out.

Because if I was doing all the chores and paying half the rent, I'd be pissed. And maybe I lost that negotiation and I'm taking it out on some other shit. But that's my general question from what we know is, you seem happy, whatever. Is the setup fine? She says they're starting a business or whatever.

That's a little weird. Like, are you in a good relationship? Let's ask that question. Are you being taken advantage of a little bit? Is that possible? Now, maybe I'm being taken advantage of. Maybe there's just someone who maybe you're scat or maybe you're messy. Maybe this person is just like, I want this fucking closet,

I asked you to either sell this or donate and you didn't do it, so I just took matters into my own hands. Some people conjure with that, that would drive me fucking crazy. If I was debating, if I had an argument with a significant other and they just got rid of something

that we didn't have like a hard and fast agreed upon date where it had to go and they knew I wanted it I would be like are you fucking kidding what the fuck are you doing you know what I mean let alone if I was to sell it I'm talking about just if I was hoarding I would be pissed but if I was like hey I plan on selling this that would piss me off that would be deeply annoying but also in that situation I feel like if I had moved my stuff into this outbox of things that is going to be sold and I had maybe dragged my feet and then all of a sudden I wake up the next day and it's donated I would feel like I fucked up a little bit too. It might temper that initial response of being pissed off but... But my and I agree with you I would have fucked up. Here's what I would say, and this is clearly

why we can never date JP, you know? Because I do, you're literally the person... Wait until the cameras are off to say something nice. You're literally the person who would do this and I would be the person to be like, excuse me, sweetheart, where's my fucking, where are my 4XL tracksuits? I would feel like I got...

I believe in your weight loss journey, you don't need them anymore. I would feel like I fucked up too, but that would be internal. Yes, you know I mean, I feel like I should have sold those but also who the fuck are you? Yeah to sell my shit Shit out of my pocket and also yeah, if that's your job and if that's how she pays half the shit And she's paying half the fuck now Again, let's go back to the top.

If she didn't have to pay shit and he donated her stuff, cost to do him business of being a stay-at-home. You know what I mean? But if that's your livelihood of what you're chipping in, plus you're doing drugs, that would piss me off. If that closet of stuff was in fact part of her life. Now, I will also say this. How much livelihood are we really talking about? That would piss me off if that closet of stuff was in fact part of her lives. I will also say this.

How much livelihood are we really talking about? And who paid for those flights to Japan? Because I flew in Japan. It ain't cheap, baby. So maybe we're just thinking about, but you know, what's your quality of life? Like, is he taking is he buying all this other cool shit? Are you going out all the time? Whatever. At the end of the day, if this is

not that substantial an amount of money theoretically, and it's mostly junk, you might have made 80 bucks or whatever the fuck, but this guy's bringing home, he's fucking paying for everything, it's annoying and you should have a conversation about it. And that's the other thing I'm unclear of how much discussion have they had? Because she's saying settle a debate, but it doesn't even feel like she's had the initial conversation with them, from what I'm hearing. Maybe I'm missing stuff. Did I miss something, Eldis?

No. Okay, so it feels like this is just something that's festering. She seems to have brought it up, right? Or did she not bring it up at all? I got the sense that she had brought it up. I think so, but she doesn't really go into many specifics here.

So look, I say you can talk about it You can also it's okay for you to draw a boundary by the way and be like hey This is my fucking lively and again be realistic Do you make actual money off this but even if you don't write this is just your relationship your partner You should feel like they respect you and if you're feeling disrespected by the fact that they just threw away your shit, or donated, I mean, he says he donated it. Go check the fucking dumpster behind your apartment complex. I gotta haunt you, you might find those

fringe jean jackets there. But anyway, it's just disrespect. I'm speaking as someone who has hoarding in his family, and who I think I have the tendency to like collect shit and I could see a significant other hating the fact that I just have this box that I don't get rid of. If they were to have a conversation with me and talk to me about it and they're like I'm just gonna if you don't do something in a week or whatever, I'm going to donate this. That's different than if I wake up one day and it's just gone. That and maybe that's control. Those are my own psychological things, whatever.

But at the end of the day, you have your partner cannot do shit that drives you fucking crazy. And you at least have to understand maybe he had the exact opposite issues, right? Where it's like, he grew up in a really messy family and it drove him crazy. So he keeps it too neat. Either way, you gotta come to a consensus. It can't just feel like they're steamrolling your thoughts and dreams for their bullshit.

I think they can come to a common ground if they sit down together and enjoy a twisted tea with each other. Perhaps she could have, you know, the original, which is delicious. And maybe he has peach. Yeah, and maybe the sacrament. Mix them together in a little cup. You can see how the flavor tastes.

I think that's a great way to look at it, Aldis. Why have you thought about cracking an ice cold twisted tea? And maybe here's the compromise. You keep your money, but you buy twisted tea for the whole family. Ooh, that's a great idea. You're allowed to keep your little shop.

And maybe he has a couple twisted teas that are brewed with real iced tea and are 5% alcohol by volume. That sounds delicious. And it's delicious. It's the perfect drink whether you're outside, at a barbecue, or inside, enjoying a film together. Whatever it is. The beverage that eases marital disputes. The alcoholic beverage.

Twisted tea. The alcoholic beverage. When you're having a heated argument with a loved one, drink it over. So the twisted tea, you fucking bitch. Great point, Elden. So anyway, keep all that in mind. Yeah, give yourself the applause man. I know you want to.

Oh, you're gonna keep it twisted. Keep it twisted. How did you get just the last part of that fucking word? I thought I'd change that setting on the fucking machine. But yeah, ultimately where do we land on this? My thing, you reminded me that my very similar thing with this when I moved in with my girlfriend was I had all these bins of my stuff, random miscellany,

and it was taking up a lot of room in our apartment. Room was at a premium, and she asked me, can you go through these bins and get rid of them? And I kind of dragged my feet doing that. And she very patiently said, can you do this again? And I ultimately did it. But if one day all my stuff from those bins had been gone, I would have been pissed.

You would have been pissed. But also, you would have had, if she did it multiple times, she'd talk to you about it, and that's different than what it seems like this motherfucker just threw the shit away, right? It's dependent on how much you've talked about it and what you said about it.

And look, maybe we're getting your side of the story and this motherfucker's asked you every day for fucking two years, right? But if this is just kind of quick, whatever. She said it was the closet? It's the fucking, it's my office! I'm on Zoom calls looking like an asshole with fucking headless Barbie dolls behind me

So yeah, look at the end of the day it comes down to what we always say is Let's have a fucking conversation about this. This clearly bothers our friend here Hmm, and you have to figure out why that bothers you so much What is it? Is it the fact that he feels like he's not listening? Is it the fact that he doesn't think the way you earn your money, he sees it as a little hobby, he doesn't respect it. Is it the fact that you just don't like feeling controlled? Maybe the fact that he's paying for everything

and he feels like he can just throw your shit away makes it feel a little too much like you're in the fucking 40s or whatever, right? Like you can't even sign up for a credit card or whatever, right? I don't know what it is, you have to search your feelings, but whatever it is, understand that, bring that context into this discussion and then have that talk where it's like, hey, I really don't appreciate you doing this.

And if you're going to do this and maybe I can be too messy, whatever, we have to institute some kind of like conversation, then a one week buffer rule. And then you're allowed to do it and I won't get mad. You know what I mean? Whatever it is. But this, like most of our questions, the answers are one or two. Have a conversation where you really speak your feelings and feel heard and respected and maybe grow closer. Or crack open a pair of ice cold Twisted Teas and don't forget to keep it twisted. Hey, stop it, baby. I need some advice. This is pretty serious stuff. I have recently overcame the dry spell of like two years and dating this girl. I really like her. We like lots

of the same stuff. She's funny, really get along, really healthy relationship. But I got her into rock climbing a couple months ago. And it's been a really fun thing that we can do together. But now she's too jacked. Like, you know, I'm looking at her arms. Like these are some dude biceps. Like her doggy style. Like I'm looking at a dude's back, bro.

And like, it makes her ass fat. But I'm like, I'm not sure what to do about it. I hope she's joking about it. Yeah, I'm in the shit, but I'm like I'm not sure what What's she up to for real I got I let her I let her fucking she takes a little chalk bag and fucking Dude I'm trying to carabine into that pussy. We're not going to sit here and be like, yeah, jacked people are disgusting. I thought he was going to say something along the lines of her grip is too much now. Right.

Which, you know, maybe some calluses, maybe that doesn't feel good. And there's a communication thing. When that's going in your ass. But worrying that she's got like definition in her back and biceps, you said her butt is getting bigger. Like, come on, bro. Unless she's like all trend out. Yeah, unless she's on gear, come on, dude.

How good can a woman actually get from rock climbing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some of those girls are in really good shape, but like it's not like they're gonna go step on the Mr. Olympia stage. Totally. Ms. Olymp And is that the, that's, that's what I miss is Olympia by the way, miss, by the way, I'll just, could you have gotten a smaller speaker? It's fucking, I'll just buy a bigger one. You piece of shit. That's the biggest, Oh, hold on. No, sorry. Go ahead. I think I figured out how to turn the volume up on that. No problem,

man. It's not a critical portion of the show. It's set up different from the one at home. But I think we did get it anyway. Whatever. Um, is that the end of it? Are we allowed to just say we fucking hate the person? So far we ain't lost me bro. I'm sorry. He's not going to say anything. That's going to exonerate him, but let's at least let him finish. She's too jacked. She's getting jackery than me. She's that's right there. That's it right there. The whole time. She's that's that's that's it right there. That's it right there. Voice the whole time. That's it right there. That's what I was gonna fucking say. And he just said it himself. Come on dude. I'm looking at the speaker like it's him. You guys stop what you're doing you fucking small anchor speaker Bluetooth speaker. Yeah. I mean that's really what it

comes down to. You know we're on the record here. I like I think it's cool when a girl is jacked that when she's strong. Obviously I'm interested in fucking all types of women from the jacked to the pleasantly plump. I'm going to look. I haven't told him yet but I am a hook stop. Oh dude that's actually so. So I will. We don't. I haven't told him yet, but I got my hook stop. Yeah. Oh dude, that's actually so Don't please don't joke about stuff like this This has been a great day I just can't get I can't get my hopes up like my dad saying dude I'm actually gonna be at your fucking football game. I don't don't do this. Don't pretend there's jacked girls waiting. So anyway, that's, he said everything he needed to say when she's getting jacked her to me. I probably better. You're

being a bitch, dude. You're being a smug. You're doing, you're engaging in top level little Dickery right now. You don't have to take this as like you suck forever, but take it as three guys telling you to suck it up like yeah you gotta check yourself homie like you do you need to check yourself are you actually because it doesn't even sound like it literally sounds like sour grapes because he's upset bigger than me now and so it's it's the class it's kind of it's literally sad actually like I feel bad for this woman where it's like this guy that you're in a relationship with who ostensibly has some feelings of love towards even if it's not you know they haven't said I love you probably didn't even want to rock climb yeah she's probably doing it and she's like hey he was right I love this and yeah maybe we're gonna be together forever and he's like stop getting strong stop being and then it's like because she's better at something than him. He's like and you know what she's ugly now I mean, that's the most classic massage. Yeah, it was be like well now she's not fuckable

It's definitely not that I feel emasculated Gross it's like she can't you don't get ugly because you fucking do like three months of rock climb You don't get jacked enough like look am I am I here to say that like looks everybody likes different stuff Is there a moment where somebody you're with? Transforms their body to such an extent that you don't find them attractive anymore Sure, that can happen a little bit of rock climbing doesn't seem like it would you're on that threshold This is so much more to me psychological about this guy You got to grow up you got to look deep in your heart and see are you actually not attracted or are you just trying to fucking?

You know You got to look deep in your heart and see are you actually not attracted or are you just trying to fucking you know? You're creating this narrative about how she's bad now because you feel like a fucking little pussy It's not like she's walking around the house ripping apples in half and like She's working out and you're the one who encouraged it Yeah, you're spending time together doing a thing that you enjoy just like appreciate that that becomes a super consistent thing with relationships whether it's money or like health or whatever people get really weird about their partners doing better than them or whatever like it's just I think that in itself like no matter what you should always want maybe I don't want you to beat me everything but if it's my partner

and my kid. That's the idea that the whole point, is that you find somebody that you're just always happy for, and especially not, to see yourself in competition with a partner is so fucked up. That's so crazy. So anyway. Maybe there's space for a little bit of competitive shit talking when you're together doing the thing.

Because I play this card game with my girlfriend, she absolutely whoops my ass at it all the time. And I'm like, you're fucking cheating the whole time. After we played a fun game together. And then you thread the drink unless she lets you win. Yeah, it's like. You're like, I'm gonna start again you fucking whore! No, this makes me thirsty.

I'm on the roof with a bottle of Jim Beam, like, stop cheating! Your race is wild. I'm on the roof with a bottle of Jim Beam, stop cheating. Just enjoy it, man. Yeah, man. I feel bad. I feel bad. Like we kind of ripped on this guy. No, that's what I needed. Don't take it as like this is the totality of who you are,

but take it as like a moment to check. Yeah, we're rooting for you to figure this out and actually think about this deeply. What's actually troubling you? And if you break up with a teller, I say, what's up? What's up, little mama? Hey, I have, I guess I'm looking for some advice. I got, I was in a relationship for four years with someone that I thought was going to last

lifetime. And he I guess his feelings have changed. And he's with someone else. Within the two weeks that we broke up. And I'm having a very hard time adjusting because we're also still living together. wants to go out and stay out over there, which is fine. No, it's not. But if you have any advice for like, what the fuck do I do to deal with this, I would appreciate you. Oh my God.

If you could address that and give me some fucking pointers because it's actually a, it's rough. It's really rough right now. Yeah. Thank you so much and I love you. Good God Almighty. I mean, by the time this comes out, hopefully you've healed.

What's Christmas? Yeah. Merry Christmas. Hopefully she has a new roommate by then. I mean, look, you are just in the, like, this is somebody who the she's in the mid a hurricane has hit her house. She's twirling around it in a fucking golf cart while she looks. She's a cow go pastor.

And she's like, how do I deal with the tornado damage? It's like you're still in the middle of the fucking tornado. This is like there's I feel so bad for you. Number one is like you can't be there and I know finances are difficult I totally get that it like you need to crash with some friends like at this point like a really good friend will understand that like you can't be in that place get out of there as soon as fucking possible break the lease if you have to if you can figure it out if you

can't you just have to spend as little time as possible From look all we have is we don't know what's going on, but from what you said. It's like This is incredibly weird and shitty behavior You can't have this person in your life. You have to go no contact fully This person is completely fucked you over and to still live with them is just impossible for you. Did she say he cheated on him, or he just started dating someone within six weeks of breaking up?

Part of it at the beginning. Two weeks, right? Two weeks, yeah. Which kind of implies there's something going on. If you've been together four years and two weeks. He's dating someone and you live in the same... Like, does that bitch come over? That's crazy. That's so inconsiderate on his part, right?

Did she say that the guy was going like to her place or something yeah he's like he's there a lot so it doesn't sound like this girl's coming over but yeah either way you got to get it that this cannot be the situation yeah and in terms of how to deal with it this is just I really hate that there's no you're just so fucked for a little bit like emotionally it's just gonna be so hard. The thing that's craziest about it is like long term, that kinda has to work towards forgiveness for your sake.

Like if you're gonna like move on and like have a better life and like imagine a better life, you're gonna have to get to that point. But right now that's so far away, it's like sounds insane. Yeah, fuck, first of all. You kinda have to. Fuck JP in his fucking Catholic bullshits.

He teaches us that I think I'm the only one on this couch who's got a divorce under the belt. And I will say, hopefully, hopefully you come back around. Like in my case, we had a kid. So I got super lucky that we came back around and communicated. You had something to bargain to hold over her head. You wanna see your kid?

Yeah. Yeah, because that's how the word works. God, dads have all the power. Right, right, right, right. I mean, yeah, like you're saying, we talked about this earlier really briefly about having your life kind of run away with momentum. Yes.

And she's in the thick of momentum right now. Like you're saying the tornado. These currents, yeah, whatever metaphor you want, waves, currents, fire, like you're in the middle of an emotional natural disaster has happened to you. And like you're gonna be living in some fucking FEMA camps for a little bit. Like it's gonna be brutal for a little bit.

And that's knowing that and letting that also by the way, you have to be okay with that. I'm like, oh, whatever. And I go out, try and go on a date with somebody that you don't even, it's not even that you don't even like them, you can't even process it. Because you're like, I don't even know what I'm thinking right now. You just go home, you're fucking devastated. Just know, just give yourself the permission to become a part of that.

And I'm like, I don't even know what I'm thinking right now. I'm like, I don't even know what I'm thinking right now. I'm like, I don't even know what I'm thinking right now. I'm like, I don't even know what I'm thinking right now. I'm like, I don't even know what I'm thinking right now. You just go home. You're fucking devastated like Just know just give yourself the the permission to be completely fucked up by this you will be incredibly sad This is like this is a betrayal and it's it's somebody that's not at the very least This wasn't handled the correct way right at the very least what you want for somebody who you've been in a four-year relationship with when they know it's over to Break it off in a considerate way

Be far away from you when they start dating somebody out like the fact this is in your you know The fact you're even aware of this is fucked up. This should be something that you find out be you know Eight months later and you have a devastating couple days, but you're like, ah, ultimately what am I gonna do? He was always gonna date somebody else. Not the second you're trying to process the breakup, you also have to deal with that. And you still see him when he comes home from work.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The only thing too I'd wanna say is just like, like we were saying about the momentum, when you get a chance, lift your head up and breathe. you know like to park keep your head up like that just taking a moment to Separate yourself from the chaos even though you're still sitting in it Just a moment where you can kind of like look at yourself from above even if it's 20 seconds Like that could change the outcome of your life. Just silly decision here or there you don't know like it's You want to give yourself permission to feel bad and not be you know mean to yourself

But at the same time don't do something that'll fuck you up Yeah, right No long term and you know, hopefully you're old mature enough and like your this isn't if you've been in a four-year relationship You're you're hopefully not like You know, yeah I mean unless you are young as hell which I don't think so because she was saying she thought it the problem is Not even the four years like she thought this was it Yeah, and for that person to pull the rug out from under you is just really really tough But you will get over this it will take too long

Like you won't feel good for at least a minimum a year to be honest with you Yeah And then it's like and then you just have to rebuild like fucked up things happen to people. This is a fucked up thing that happened to you. We're sorry. And you just have to sort of believe in yourself and not, you know, feel this, let it run through you, but also don't let it completely fuck your shit up. Stay, stay on top of work, stay on top of your health, stay on top of work stay on top of your health stay on top of your even your social Connections to your friends and you know not dating yet But like you don't want to go into a cocoon because you know that happens to with breakups sometimes exactly

Yeah, she doesn't work out. We got a guy for yeah Robert's totally right like that if you have like the moment to take a second like that's where like mindfulness Practices and should really come in handy at times like this. Now he's fucking, he was Catholic before. I'm going Eastern with you. Now he's Buddhist. Now I'm Buddhist. But you don't wanna compound things

with some other crazy shit that you invite into your life by how emotional you're feeling. So just take a second. I've made so many bad emotional decisions in my life. Worst one, go, no. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding worst one go now. Give me like number nine. I don't, I don't know. But like, you know, you, you get, I'm 40 now. So like, I look back and I'm like, fuck, like I, so many times I could have had be a reset moment and instead I just

let it keep slip. Oh, for sure. I've definitely had those moments too for you know and it's different stuff for everybody addiction does it for people you know trauma happen you know other traumatic experience death you know you know a loss of a loved one break breakups can happen you know what I mean like all of these are the kinds of things that can completely derail things but they can also be big reset moments So let this be one of those for you and ultimately as this doesn't help to hear now But that's not the motherfucker you wanted to marry if this is the kind of person that treats you like this

He did you a favor it was good It was either now or it's like ten years later when you have a kid and it's like even worse, right? So good luck. Sorry Brutal stuff. We're not gonna lie we're your friends so we're not gonna lie to you but we are rooting for you big yelled what's up stop a longtime listener for some color with about this esteemed guest without giving away too much I have a job and a kind of well-known University and like a public facing job at sporting events and you know for the most part people are really

really positive and really nice but every once in a while you get you accidentally run across some like pretty mean comments so I guess I was just wondering like how do you deal with any sort of negative feedback? All right. And how do you kind of just like move on through that? Because you're obviously way more well-known than I'll ever really be. So thanks again. Love the show.

He's talking about people coming up to him in costume and not being cool. Being like, being like, Alabama's gay. Stop, stop me. How do you deal with being an asshole? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, get that a lot though, like, the, like, what's up big boy, can I pick you up? Can I do this? You know? Oh yeah, definitely, and I think like a lot of it is,

I mean, the best thing to do is to just let them sit in their comment. For me, anyways, this is hard because these people, this is different a little bit, right? Because like these people think they're being funny, like, they think I'm going to they just think they say something that's going to be funny. They don't understand it's rude. They don't know me. You've been hearing that over and over. It's not even if they had a good one.

You know if it was a good one sometimes I have like not that it not that I'm encouraging people to say they were like I'll talk somebody they say like good and it's like oh we didn't even Brought this up the guy at the fucking for restaurant To smithereens where we meet we were fucking it we were we were at we were getting for it was a wait Were you know I wasn't straight George. Yeah, yeah straight. It was straight George the nutrition expert It was me George and eldest and we were sitting to get pho. This guy doesn't know who I am at all, right? We're ordering, and I had just gotten over food poisoning, so I'm like, we want to get soup, something kind of light. And I order a small bowl of pho,

and the guy goes, small? Doesn't know me at all. Literally catches me off guard in a way, because I thought it's like, you know, you don't gun it's like a you know yeah you're a gunslinger but I left it with my horse I'm at a safe I'm in a saloon where my protection has been you know what I mean like he completely caught me off guard I'm flat-footed you're at the big and tall exactly it's like it's crazy how I had nothing I couldn't even like get him back I was just like shocked but you know what I was laughing because he did get me. You know what I mean? But yeah, that's rare though for you guys. Super rare. Every single one of you thinks you're going to be the one to do that. But

that's also why it worked because he had no idea who I was. It was just like so it's also like such bad customer service. I'm a comedian, right? I found it funny. My friends found it funny because we bust on each other. Like this is a story we'll tell forever. It's it actually he did in a weird way because of how we're set up enrich our lives. But we were talking and it was like, imagine if we're like guys that work together. And I'm a fat guy who's insecure about how much he eats. Oh yeah. And the waiter's like, really? You fast fucking slug you're gonna eat a small soup

That was a wild move, bro But in terms of general negativity like yeah I like to let people sit in it like because they'll usually say something incredibly ignorant or they'll say something whatever You ignore a lot of it right like again. I'm guessing you're a mascot I would say just do a backfl away from them. If I were you, um, shoot it, shoot them in the face with a t-shirt gun. If you're a mascot or a comedian or a public figure, you've got to have like a repertoire of responses in the back fucking pocket.

Like I can't tell you how many times people ask me to arm wrestle or whatever. So I have some, I literally have like five things. I used to go, I changed it. I used to be a little bit harsher. Now I make a joke. Now, like it's the same joke over and over and over. And it's like, literally I say that like 20 times a day. So if you're a mascot and people keep coming over, like trying to pull your tail

or whatever, like you have something prepared. Yeah. You have to have something prepared. Like pepper spray or a knife or something. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Don't get caught lacking in a suit. Yeah. But yeah, in general, man, it's like you kind of you got to let it as much as you can roll off your back. He calls back. He's like like I'm the quarterback of Texas football

Arch manning. I know it's the other guy that got who was when you were everybody's begging for arch manning Signed to Texas didn't he? Yeah, he's playing there. Yeah So yeah, dude, I don't know. There's like that Will Chamberlain story have something in the back pocket We're like someone said hey, I was the weather up there and he spit on their head and he said it's raining Saw him compete like he did like a track and field thing. Yeah Destroyed it. Yeah crazy like watching a guy who's like barely train for it Yeah, just the way he moved man did the high jump like this is obviously an old video. He's dead Did the high jump like eight feet or something. And this is obviously an old video, he's dead, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I'm just so lying, right? No, he died like 15 years ago, but he had like a cap on and he was like, he did the high jump with no training and did like eight feet, no problem. Jumped into hay, like they jump with their stomach towards the bar and land on a little hay.

He used to lift with Arnold. He lifted with Arnold. Arnold said he was one of the strongest athletes he's ever seen. I saw him, he did Conan, like he was in one of the Conan's. Yeah, Conan and Barbarian. And there's a very famous photo with Arnold, Andre the Giant, who was my hero growing up.

And it's not Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, it's- Will Chamberlain, yeah. No, it's definitely Will. Yeah, he's with Conan. In Conan, I'm pretty sure it's Will Chamberlain. All right, yeah. So Wilt was the one that was in Bruce Lee's movie, right? Yeah, Kareem was in Bruce Lee.

No, Kareem was. Was in Bruce Lee, Wilt was in. Conan. Conan. Okay. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, cause Arnold has a story about working with Wilt and like Wilt was gonna jump off a thing and Arnold was like, and then Wilt, he said to me, Arnold, I am coming.

And then he jumped off the cliff or something like. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he said like, he was a fucking beast athlete. Like he'd work out with the Gold's Gym guys and just at like age 50 magic Johnson's in Gold's gym Venice really like five times a week kicking ass Still that's all I still haven't had the balls to go up to him, but I want to like I see him I geek out a little bit. Of course my favorite school. Yeah, he's an insane shape for still Like old having HIV the whole thing. Yeah Like he's got like literally no it's untraceable at this point

which is fucking wild yeah that is cool salute to science for making HIV science and money baby oh did you know that you must know since Andre the giant is your hero cuz it just struck me like you were a theater kid and then you became a gigantic strong man you know Andre Giant was like, when he was a kid, he would get driven to school by Samuel Beckett, the playwright, they were friends. No, I didn't know that. He was like 15, he was this gigantic kid

and they just struck up a friendship. They lived in the same. Is that true? Yeah, they lived in like. I read that and I thought it was one of those internet hoax articles. Well, I choose to believe. Yeah, no, it sounds right. He lived on a farm or something. Yeah, right. I just didn't do the research. It just sounded so cool that I was like,

that's fucking awesome. Yeah. I freaking loved Andre. Like Princess Bride was one of my favorites. Like people throw around the word legend a lot, but like that's a fucking legend in every aspect. The amount he could drink. I went and hung out.

We're doing quite interview stuff. Go, go. Okay, so and hung out, we're doing quite interview stuff. Go, go. I hung out with Roddy Piper two months before he passed. Was at a baseball game in Pennsylvania and he was so fucking cool. The coolest dude hung out with us for hours, just super cool, and the whole time he was just like, don't ever be a wrestler, man. don't ever be a wrestler man, don't ever be a wrestler man.

Like just begging me and then he kept telling me all these stories about Andre and all this stuff. He was telling me the story and I think I'd heard it on a podcast somewhere, someone else told it. But they were on a flight and Andre obviously didn't fit in bathrooms on a flight. So they were flying and I think it was an overseas flight. And so what they had to do was they just took like

clear tarp and they put it all through the cockpit part, where you know, where they make the food and everything. They covered that in the tarp and Roddy had to hold Andre's hands while he leaned back over the tarp and just shit all around. He's in a deep squat. Then they wrapped that up and then they put that there on the plane for the rest of the flight. Elder's going to do that in the tour bus.

Take notes. Elders idea on the tour bus. Yeah. We've been talking a lot about the tour. That's been like the extent of my tour managing. Just really worried about where we can sit. When will he's had so many on the bus driver explicitly told him no shitting on the bus. The rule, you know, trust me, I had a call with him. He was like, you can't shit on the bus. You know, I was like, yeah, we've been talking about it from your voice. That guy's suspect number one. We needed like an emergency bin full of like those glade scent bombs or something. All right, well yeah, fuck that guy. Got another question, Eldis?

It's getting late. We got to start. We got to get high and watch Friday. Yeah, we got urgent business. So we'll do maybe two more. Hey Eldis, K-Stars. For some background, I'm a young woman, I'm in my early 20s and I really like having sex. Nice. But a problem I've kind of run into or that's manifested is that I feel like I don't always contribute enough into like the physical actions of it. Like it feels more like I'm getting

fucked and like ideally we should be fucking each other. Interesting. And so I'm seeking advice on how to engage more and be exciting. Some other background, I'm a fat woman. So I feel like that sometimes limits the range of things. But also, I feel like that's not a great excuse. Because like, sure, in my experience, that doesn't affect that man as much. So I don't know what they I don't know if it's a mental thing. But I don't know what the biggest thing is going on.

Additionally, things are covered in the head department. Don't need advice there. One of the most redeeming factors of the overall experience, I guess. That's huge. Otherwise, yeah, I could use some moves and some advice. What do you guys like? Thanks.

Have you ever told, like literally in real life, have you ever honestly told a girl anything but that she was amazing ahead? Hmm. I don't think I've ever given a negative head review. There's nobody but I also haven't been effusively Haven't infusively praised anyone who didn't deserve it Okay, I've like I'll say that was good But like I'll really make it clear I mean it right but the girl who sucks at it She doesn't get to see all the other one Good I believe

There's a stereotype I do find hold some truth if I were to say anything negative about a girl who gave me head I would feel like an Italian grandmother had served me a meal and I like critiqued the pasta There is horrific head out there That does exist if it's painful. Yeah, you gotta say I'm trying to think now I'm trying to think one girl wouldn't give me head because I was uncircumcised and that was fucked up, but I guess no, I haven't. Ever dated a Mormon girl? No.

Well, used to be, which actually is awesome. You know, like an ex-Mormon. Yeah, yeah, super freaky. Let's just say, yeah, exactly. There was no problem with head at all. Or the back door because they're used to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what having sex is to them because you know, God,

Mormon God is okay with you getting fucked in your ass. Tricking God. He's a closed eye to the brown eye. He doesn't look, yeah, yeah. That's like the blind spot with the security camera is a woman's asshole. Well, Joseph Smith said that. For sure.

I was baptized Mormon when I was 11. What the fuck? And my parents were pretending because we were so poor, we had no food, and the Mormon church feeds their people. Very well. Wow. So we started going to church, and I did baptisms for the dead and everything.

Whoa. I don't think my parents really thought they were faking, just for their sake. Sure, sure, sure. I think they thought they were trying, but it was really just, we were digging it out. Yeah, yeah. But. That's a good idea to just go to a different religion every six months. just for their sake. I think they thought they were trying, but it was really just, we were digging it out. We needed help. That's a good idea to just go to a different religion

every six months, the ones that feed you. Yeah, Deseret Industries, I'm like, we would have, they make the best beef stew I've ever had. But like pantries full of food, all your milk, all your cheese, all that shit. Wow, really? Yeah, and they also would help out with other things. They don't do it for everybody, but they definitely,

they give food to all their members and all that stuff too. Interesting, that is a, you know, if all religions did that, shit would be a lot better off. It's a good way to scope it out, figure out where you wanna be, like what's the spread like at the Baha'i Temple? Yeah. See what kind of snacks we have.

The Catholics, famously bad at snacks. Yeah, yeah, you motherfuckers are buying gold crosses for the fucking priests. How about a fucking, how about some Dinty Moore? Anyway, back to our friend. What was her issue again? She's, she feels like she's not doing enough to fuck. Now, I would say, if you're going crazy with head,

that's good. I mean, that's a great place to start. In terms of the actual coitus here, what do you really want to do? You just don't want to get, you don't want to be a passive participant. I mean, then ride some dick, I think is the number one maneuver. Do the kind of like, and you know, if you're a big, if you're a bigger girl, I get that, you know, I'm doing bodyweight squats, squats my knees hurt you might need to fucking bulletproof your knees You know you may do some some work like dick riding is actually the number one

Way a woman can apply herself I think we can all agree and a sign of a pillow princess is someone who won't ride dick for longer than a couple minutes Don't be one of those people right?? I mean, whatever, you want to be that. Personally, most of it is fucking. I don't really give a fuck. Right, exactly. I'm fine looking at Titties Bobble while I fuck a girl and bust.

That's cool with me. But if this is something she wants to work towards, maybe do the kind of riding dick, absolutely. Being an active participant in doggy style sex can be fun if a girl pushes back on your dick a little bit. Sometimes, I've been around people who do a little too much leg locking for my taste, you know what I mean? Or they'll play with legs or whatever.

Limits the mobility. Yeah. I've had girls when they finish they lock like that. I like that, that's different, that's different. That's cool Yeah, yeah, yeah something I even like I even like the the that makes me feel like, you know The final boss is getting desperate and throwing all its finishing moves at me to make me not make a girl come And I like the person's over. Yeah. Yeah. I like that but but I just mean like, you know These are the these are the common things I think if everyone's having a good time if you're sucking dick like an animal

If you maybe want to bounce on some dick a little more, I think that's those are my main You know, those are my main if you're if you're covered in the head department I think you're pretty good here with with oral and with just regular vaginal like this feels like a fucking what's that love line yeah like that whether we consider ourselves one of the spiritual successors to love my vaginal felt love line yeah yeah so whether you're giving head or fucking yeah either way a little noise goes a long way true a long way a little neck kiss here and there Yeah, yeah, yeah, I wonder if she's like enjoying it or what she's thinking if she's like feeling self-conscious

During it like right am I fucking good on my fucking bed, right? I think the most awesome sex is just like when you achieve ego death and you're just getting your fuck on. It's like just think about what you can do to get there without just not even thinking about it but just fucking. Getting in the zone. She's on the right route. It's cool.

Like a lot of girls they think just showing up is your thing, right? Right. She's in the game. She's trying to figure out how can we work? So that right there shows you're in the right fucking every offseason. She comes back with a jump hook With Hakeem Elijah Great centers, but listen the wise warrior wins the battle before it's even begun low post. Now we're back to Wilt Chamberlain. It all comes back to great centers. But listen, the wise warrior wins the battle before it's even begun. So just enjoy it first and then just go for it. The Jocko of Coxsuckers.

All right, Elders, you got something fun for us to go out on here? Hey, Stav, not a question, but rather a comment on the continuing unfolding nature of breast reductions and our opinions about them in society. I was totally on your side. I was like, why would anyone slap God in the face by reducing the size of your breast? However, last night, I got with a girl before we start getting that closed off she tells me she got the breast reduction I gasped like no but then takes her bra stop I gotta say they were fucking nice they were really nice I mean what do you need it most like a handful

handful and a half make it that little bit Come into your house and disrespect you Fucking fall I come into your house and tell you your God's not real Call your call you who you prayed to a false prophet Don't fucking tell me how much Tits I need motherfucker and by the way, I love titties of all shapes and sizes I'm just saying, you know, look I will say I'm less I'm less of a hard line No, this is kind of like, you know, I'm evolving. You're not fully anti-choice on this

It's kind of like how even some conservative pro-lifers will be like, all right, incest and rape, we can talk about it. You show me a fucked up MRI, you're back. You fucking, you all right, we can start talking. Okay, but don't you fucking tell me how many types of tits? How big a titty I need or like and like I said, I like all I like a fat ass titty I like a little ass titty. They just got to be nice titties But you know, let's let's not get science involved where we don't need it. That's all I'm saying Why with that joke, you know the old lady's titty. I don't like you want to see it. He's like, yeah And she plopped

it out. Yeah. She just rolled it back. All titties are good titties. Yeah. Don't. But I will. But I will say you know I'd love to know more about this woman's situation. I'd love to get specifics. But you know don't try and come out here blanket. You see one pair of nice reduced titties and you you're gonna fucking tell me to change my whole worldview, you fucking piece of shit. And by the way, I've seen some nice, reduced titties as well. I'm not saying once you have a reduction,

you're a pariah whose tits can't get sucked on anymore. I'm just saying, before we do anything hasty, let's really think, is this medically necessary? That's all You got me pissed off now. I'll work up. I'm fucking work girl who had to get the reduction in high school She was a little little thing and she had messed up knees like she No, no, I'm starting so she had surgery on both knees from something else Okay And she got older and bigger in the chest,

her back started messing up and her knees with it. Like, so she had, you know, it's really fucked up. I just remembered this. It was junior high and she had literally just had surgery and I didn't know. And I remember we were going to the bus and I went over and I was like, hey, I did that. And I did the complete worst thing a fat guy in love with a girl could do.

And I ruined like messed up her leg and like all the rest of my life I was known as the fat guy that destroyed it. Oh no dude. Yeah, it was bad. But her, she, she got the reduction and it was phenomenal. Nice. Good for, good for. Look, we're, we're not against open debate on this forum. I got the reduction and it was phenomenal. Nice. Phenomenal. Good for, look, we're not against open debate on this forum.

Okay, so we'll hear your opposing case. Like if a woman lives in a fifth floor walk-up, sure. Right. We got the reduction. Yeah. She's killing herself. But I wanna see, you know. Paperwork.

Six months of you going to open houses and seeing apartments. Some Pilates. Yeah. Are you trying to naturally bolster? Yeah But again, before, yeah, we just need that. You need to see a doctor. This is my most conservative. This is how you, this is my most conservative take. You need to go to fucking you have a therapist. You have to make sure you want to make your tits smaller. Yeah. Hands off my titties. God bless

everyone. God bless all the titties out there and Thank you for listening everybody Rob my man. Thanks for coming. This is so great. You're so funny and we will JP of course, thank you for being Ed McMahon and We strong guy advice just counts for more Yeah, you're gonna listen to a guy who could fucking crush your skull with his hands. But he wouldn't but he could. Thanks guys. We will talk to you next time. Bye bye.