Stavvy's World - #167 - Marie Faustin and Alex English

Episode Date: February 9, 2026

Marie Faustin and Alex English return to the show (for the first time together!) to discuss Stavvy’s World’s Black History Month programming, what Rachel Dolezal’s been up to, going 50/50 on dates, getting in trouble for spilling parental gossip to family friends, Cam Newton’s fits, Diddy, and much more. Marie, Alex and Stav help callers including a trans man whose bodybuilding roommate is stealing his testosterone, a woman whose boyfriend won’t eat it after she co-signed his car, and a young man who has trouble dating due to his over-the-top Canadian accent. Rufat Agayev also joins briefly to help give advice to a woman with a twisted question about a massive inheritance that her roommate is expecting. Follow Marie Faustin on social media:https://www.instagram.com/reeezyhttps://x.com/MsReeezy  https://www.tiktok.com/@mareeezy  https://www.youtube.com/@MaReeezy   Follow Alex English on social media:https://www.instagram.com/alex3nglishhttp://twitter.com/alex3nglishhttps://www.tiktok.com/@alex3nglish   Follow Rufat Agayev on social media:https://www.rufatagayev.com/https://twitter.com/Rufat__Agayevhttps://www.instagram.com/rufat_agayev/https://www.youtube.com/@rufat_agayev     Thank you to our sponsors!Cash App - https://cash.app/ CODE SECURE10Visible - https://www.visible.com/ switch now!Twisted Tea - https://www.twistedtea.com/locations Keep It Twisted!! ☎️ Want to be a part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!🎟️ See Stavvy live on the Dreamboat Tour 🛥️💕!!! https://stavvy.biz/ for tickets‼️ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Opa! Welcome everybody to Stavi's World 904-800-Staff. Call in. We'll solve all your problems. Returning to the pod, two favorites. Never been on together, I don't think. Alex and Marie, thanks for coming, guys. Look at us.

It's not even Black History Month. Well, it actually is. It is when this comes out. Stop, you're not sleek. The first Monday of Black History Month. Oh, okay. We're kicking it off. It could be.

I don't know, actually. It's definitely in February. right now. I don't know if it will be exclusively black for Black History Month. You should do all black guests. That would be,

and then never, let the rest of the year. The last episode of February. Do what you do, how you do it. Yeah. The last episode of February should be Rachel Dulles-Az. Oh, yeah.

Absolutely. And March of Supreme. A real hero. Rachel is also a real civil rights icon. And active. It is hilarious how she was just like, even after she got caught. She's like, yeah, whatever.

And she's still chilling. She's still chilling online, still being black. He was doing Only fans for a while. Onby fan. I think that's still active. Was she doing it in Blackface? No, I would say more like beige face. Base face is what she was up to, you know?

Did you watch that documentary? I did. Years ago when it was on Netflix. I watched it. Oh, they had a documentary on Netflix. She had a documentary and she, like, it was so bizarre because at one point, it was like one of the final scenes, she's like in her bathroom. She's in her, remember that?

She's doing her baby hair? Listen, remember that episode? Have you seen that episode? Have you seen said it all? Yes. Remember the scene when Jay does Pinkett Smith is in Mexico and she's like snapping and she's like cutting her braids off? Mm-hmm. There's a scene at the end of it.

Oh, wow. Rush Doles out is on her bathroom floor. A dramatic. Scooping up this yarn, blonde yarn braids and putting them into a trash can. Oh, the symbolism. It was so funny. Does she have a man? I believe so.

She got like two or three kids. So somebody hitting that. Yeah, I believe she does. Yeah. She's married to a black guy. Yeah, for sure. Oh, absolutely. Oh, my God, the bar is hell.

She said, I'm staying at home. I'm not dating white dudes. I'm going to be a white woman so I too can get a black man. And I'm going to get big. Yeah, Rachel, Rachel Dozo was, it was, she had some interesting stuff going on there. If you go on her Instagram, there is like a community of, like, black people who are like, hey, good morning, queen. Yeah. Alex you in the Dozo High?

Absolutely. Go to her Instagram. Yeah, let's check it out. Look at that. What my God. Look at that. Now she's going Afro-Latina. Now she's going

Dominican. Oh. Her new name is like Inkechie or something like that, right? Yeah, she's not serious. You know what? You got to tip your cap. To not only go black,

but be like, I'm African. Honestly, she looked darker than Rashida Jones. That's a white woman. You're so right. She is. She's going for Rashida Jones with braids 100%. Wow.

Oh, Rachel. Yeah. We should get Rachel on the pod. I would love to have Rachel. I would love to have from the podcast. Are you kidding me? I'd love to ask, like, what started this, Rachel? Like, how did this happen?

How did we get here? We all know white women that want to fuck exclusively black guys. And that is who she is basically, right? She got like fake freckles now, too. No, because didn't we find out, wasn't she like part of the end of the end of, She was the head of it. She was the head of it. She was the head of like Spokane. It was a Spokane.

There ain't no black people here. I will be the black person who steps up. But it's just like what that's, and I will, I just have to tip my head to like continuing after you're found. She looks like Northwest right there. Oh man. Damn. Good for her. Oh, is that?

In Ketchi Diallo. That's her name. Inkechia diallo. Say her name. Say her motherfucking name. Inkechi Diallo is fucking awesome, dude. But she kept at Rachel Dalzol because she had the, she already had the clout. Yeah.

Right. Nobody knows how to spell in case. Enclactic. Let's, Elders, let's pull up some more risque photos. This is how we're starting. Yeah. It doesn't have, who. Find the black, white.

Imaging. Oh, come on. Oh, yes. Come on. Oh man. Right there. That's good stuff. Yeah, that's good stuff.

She thinks her name is Inkechie, but she's naked in the woods. That's white woman behavior. Yeah, it's true. Through and through. Yo, those are the same exact brain she was snapping off in the day in the... That's so fucking awesome. In the documentary. She looks whiter than ever in that actually.

Marie, you should be her for Halloween. That would be a good one. That would be a good one. I am myself. That is true. I'm going to be like Inkechi Diallo. They're going to be like, who? Salute to Rachel Dolesal.

Anyway, nice to have you guys back. Marie, only a half hour late, even though we're not in Queens. You were weirdly more on time when this was in Queens. What happened? What happened today? I would leave my house the day before for Queens. I'm not going to lie.

You said, let's record at two. I left my house at two. I'm not a thing. Yeah. Also, yesterday when she asked me to come over with her, She was like, next show you at the podcast tomorrow. And I'm like, she texts me. She's like, because he said he didn't know the address.

He said he didn't. I didn't want him to go to Queens. Right. I would have went to Queens as you not told me. Right. That's good. Exactly. I'd have been knocking on your neighbor's door like, we're doing the pot here.

Isn't it? Reggie did that to Amina. He told her the wrong day. And she came when no one was home. And she was just knocking. She just was in his story, huh? But Amita took the train, so it only caused her $2.90 and, I don't know, two hours of her life. Of course.

That's where you can't get back, the hours of life. But, you know, what are you going to do? How's everybody doing, man? Alex, you're back. You're fresh from Los Angeles. Los Angeles, Texas. A Hollywood power player? I went from Nat to Texas Austin Comic for a month.

Oh, nice. Okay. You was at Joe Rogan in his house? I walked past that club every single time. Did not go inside. Oh, you didn't say. I saw them, I saw them AR-15s. I was like, no, no, no, no, no. Are they in the window?

No, they're in front of the club. Oh, yeah, they have, like, security. They have, like, um, like retired green berets. Well, they need, they need that. They got ICE agents. I don't think they got ICE agents, but they got guys that if they didn't have the, that gig. Yeah. They might be looking at ICE.gov.

Listen. Applications. Yeah. And based on some of the stuff that goes on inside that club, yeah, you need some some guns outside of it. just the case I'm talking about to pop off from there. Imagine the insane people that are like, I'm friends with Joe Rogan. Like imagine the like

because we're talking about guys who are like conspiracy guys. They probably think Joe is giving them, like giving them signals to like hey. Like the Liver King was trying to like fight him or something. You remember that? Liver King lost his mind. I didn't hear about this. He was eating cat testicles or whatever.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd go crazy too for all. No, he lost his mind but yeah, shout out to the Green Berets guarding the mothership. But it was cool. I mean, I had, you know, I had a decent time. I like Austin. It was fun. Yeah.

I liked it. Alex, you might have had too much fun in L.A. What were we up to, Alex? I was working, okay? Working with an E! Working. I was working, okay? No, I just like, like, I had never been in L.A.

I was there for like six months. I had never been there that long. I've been there a few times. Popped in and out. But what I realized was you can't take one selfie with a palm tree behind you without people. My friends being like, oh, look at you. You love L.A. I'm like, I never said I hated it, though.

I never said I hated it, though. Awesome. I never lived there long enough too hate. The lady doth protest too much, Alex. Sounds like you fucking loved L.A. Sounds like you're moving back. It was fine. I just was like, oh, but it's not New York.

I'm like everything. I'm walking everywhere looking homeless. Oh, yeah. I was walking all over L.A. I literally had like three separate friends on three separate occasions texting me, I saw you walking. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They said, you good?

Where's the girl from me, babe? At no point during any of those texts, anybody saying I was going to turn around and come get you either. I'm like, this city is fake. Yeah. Interesting. That might be Alex, but I don't want to be racist. That could be any black guy with a backpack.

I just was walking everywhere. I mean, got like a farmer's. tan. I like the sun was always. I was like, I get it. I had the thighs out. You had the thigh back out? I had to. I mean, you had to. It was like 90 degrees every day. Beautiful. Yeah, I'm jealous. It was all right. I love the sun. I love getting out there. I love getting tanned up. This has been very hard for me. I went to the, I did a little, uh, wellness retreat in the desert over the like the heart of the winter, like December, January. It was fucking awesome. And then I come back here, I'm depressed. I need the sunshine. I mean, it's been 50 degrees in New York.

It's been good. Shout out to global warming that high. Hot beach. It's been pretty good. But yeah. In fact, we're doing, we're doing, we're doing, we're doing, we have a studio upstairs. We're doing this because I pulled my ass cheek muscles. And I'm in a chair that supports, supports, no. How do you pull your ass cheek?

Deadlift, unfortunately. A cable deadlift. Crazy because given how I live my life, I have never. Better pulled an ice cheek? It's crazy that happened to you and never to me. It is true. It is true. All your, I also had, I have.

I haven't engaged in an affectivity in a long time. Shut up. Oh, you're a celibate man now? No, no, no, no. You're switched up. Batonimo. You're top. Botomín.

As I say in France. Yeah. Yeah. How's it they say? Boto mien. Now, do you mature into topping? Is that what's... We've talked about this before.

Right, right. We've discussed this before. Being a bottom is a childish activity. I haven't done it since I was like 31. Yeah. Well, I feel like being a bottom is like peak gay. Yeah. Like varsity gay.

Right, right, right. hopping, you know, any straight-man. The closer you get, the closer you get, the-fucking ass. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the closer you get to having to go and get a colonoscopy, I think you got to, like, you know, wrap it up, wrap it up and use your fronts. Yeah, if you've had polyps removed, you can't get your ass fucked anymore? And low-key might be sitting on one right now.

I need to check it out. You want to sit on a hot thing that he's sitting on for his book? Yeah, yeah. I literally have the heating pad on, Alex. Yeah. Interesting. Now, then I feel bad, though. What if an old guy wants to get his ass fucked, you know?

I'm still doing it. Oh, there's plenty of porn out there. You can look and look it up. Old men are getting, getting wrecked out here. And every time I see these videos, I'm like, because there's a lot of videos that you know how Twitter you just like swipe. It's like, oh, I'm watching gay sex.

Sure. Of course. You know when you jump on X and you see sex? When you're on X, the everything app. You never know where you're going to. It truly is everything. There is a section of that place where, like, you'll scroll and you'll see gray pubs getting pounded.

Nine. From the POVs. Okay. missionary style and I'm like oh Unk, Granddaddy You know what I get I need to change my algal You know what I get a lot

Is I get women on a roller coaster And their tits almost pop out I get that video over and over again And I watch every second of it The algorithm is a mirror Come on this one's gonna pop out And they never do They never show nipple

Which is fucking bullshit One's got to pop out Stop you need to write a letter to your congressman Start showing tits on roller coasters What's our algorithm give me? On what X? Anything.

Whatever, yeah. That's true. What kind of media do you even consume? Right now I'm getting a lot of Cam Newton content. Outfit of the day, inspo. O-O-T-D? Yes, scarecrow of the day. I will say I can see a Cam Newton-style guy being with a Rachel Dahlzal.

Oh, really? To come all the way back. Yeah. But I feel like she might be too smart for him. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah. You know, he got a lot of CTE under the media. I don't know since I think she got some CTE in there too.

Yeah, absolutely. I think they are actually equally yoked. The CTE, yeah, but. It is funny. He's decided he's a philosopher now. Oh, my God. And he's those conductors hats and the like the whole fridge. When you make Natalie Nunn makes, when you make Natalie Nunn look intelligent.

Something wrong. Someone said he dresses how he spells. and he can't spell. See, he loves weird fonts. Oh, he loves, yeah. I didn't know, but all his caption used to be in hieroglyphics. Yep, yep. Ooh, CTD.

He loves giant ass. He would be here because I do so bad with these big ass hats. Look at this. He looked like he just like dove into a pile of clothes and was like, ta-da, this is the outfit. Every day is laundry day at his house. Yeah. Like, what is this? Have you?

He cut the top off. Yeah. He does cut the top off of his head. Hold up to the scene with a pile. with a ceiling missing? I saw him from behind at the Atlanta airport like a year or two ago. You recognize him from his...

That's Cam Newton. You recognized him from his butt or his hats? The hat. He was wearing a suede pinstripe suit is probably why. He looked something... I just was like, you know how you can tell who Fran Leibowitz from behind.

Like, you know that, you know that person. I don't know. I don't know. I feel like there's a lot of friend Leibowitz is in this neighborhood. Yeah. Yeah. A bunch of Edna's from the back.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he looks like Joseph and his coat of many colors. So what do you get? What do you get, like his wisdom or? If he wrote up on you, would you go out with her? Absolutely not. If you didn't know who he was and he wrote up on you with this outfit on, you wouldn't.

I'd be like, oh, eclectic. Yeah. Yeah, how long could somebody dress like that have a conversation with you, do you think, Marie? Free of the baggage. The way my ADHD is set up, I'm going to start from the top and work my way down And then come back up. Right. And be like, wow, that's an interesting pin.

Are these glasses for real or for fake? Yeah. He looks like he pops the lenses out of his frames. Yeah. I mean, the hats are really interesting. What did happen? I guess you're right. He has like 9 kids.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they all dress them together. Yeah. Everyone picks an article of clothing. That's what it's giving. It's like a kindergarten art project. Yeah. Interesting.

So, yeah, I guess stuff like that. I get dating content a lot. And yeah, let's see what else is on my. What kind of dating kind of? Like people talking about their dates? The last thing that I saw was this girl said she messaged a guy she was supposed to go on a date with and she said, hey, are we going 50-50 on this date or not?

And he was like, yeah, let's go 50-50. So she said she showed up in sweatpants with no makeup. And one of her nails was missing. And he said, I wish you would put a little bit more effort. and she said, why? We just hanging? She goaded him into it, though. And a light bulb appeared above Marie's head.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I said, oh, I could be ashy on this. We should have to show up late and cross. Well, yeah, she said, you know, I'm just hanging with the bro. What I did? What would I put makeup on? That's crazy to... That's the philosophy.

But it's also crazy to, like, waste you. one of your evenings that way. You know what I mean? Why would she even do that? Then it's like, if you know you're not going to date a guy who wants to go 50-5. Although I will say she kind of trapped him into it. How? He didn't, he wasn't, he was like, oh, she must be some, she must have some moral, philosophical

thing where she wants to go 50-50. Whereas he might have not. He might have just paid for the whole thing. I would never. If he wanted to pay. If he wanted to, he would. Okay. But see, this is the mind games portion of modern dating where it's like, she puts 50-50

even in his mind. That never was any... He didn't say, let's go 50-50. I said, man, why are you trying to go Dutch with me? Listen, I'm never splitting a check on, unless it's like some kind of crazy. We've been dating forever and it's like just normalized kind of. You get me... But even then, I feel like it's like, oh, I'll get this one, whatever.

Yeah. I mean, whatever. At this point, I'm made a hilarious amount of money. I'm not going 50-50. In my mind, if we've been together for a while and I want to pick up the check, I'll pick up the whole thing. Right, right, right. We not...

That's fair. Half and half. No. I'm not, I don't even go 50-50 with my friend. Like, with eldest or whatever, it's like, well, I fucking pay for everything. But like, but I mean, like, you don't have a corporate card? Oh, I'll just like, I got this one who swipes the corporate card. I pay for it after all. You need a coffee? If you do, I'll use the corporate card.

No, it's mine. You fucking piece of shit. You can't get one fucking coffee. I buy every fucking meal. Hey. You living good, Daddy? No, no, it's true. But I mean, like, even, you know, like, let's say a friend of an equal bank account, you're right. We're never going 50-50.

It's like, all right, you get this when I get the other one. Yeah. I'm listening to y'all, and I'm just like, heterosexuality is a prison. Yeah, well, gay guys don't even, might not even, we'll just speak with their voices. There might just be text messages. You might have never heard him talk. Gay guys, one of them not even go eat. Eating.

He's like, I ate at the house. And then the one who does, we just don't pay. We leave. Yes, dining and dash, maybe. All 2026 we dine and dash. And that's what I call eating ass. Dine and dash. I eat and I leave.

Now, is that behavior changed? Because you're saying you're topping now. What are you still doing like a way? When you're topping, you're eating way more ass than you've ever had in your life. Oh, good for you. That comes through the territory. Yeah. You know, but you know, you got to be careful.

You got to sniff first. Well, they're doing all that prep. Not always. They're not always prepping? Not always. Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something. Literally.

Not to be crass. Alex, this is where you can be crass. Not to be crass. This is a Christian program. Yeah, my pastor is watching. But back in my bottoming days, I never, zero accidents on my end. Good for you. So I don't get how these boys are running around here.

Thank you. Thank you. Because nobody's applauding at home. The boys are saying come as you are. It's awesome to take a pull up your pants approach to getting your ass fucked to like a Bill Cosby like where's the decency when I got my ass fucked

true my hole was clean these boys these days don't know anything about a bidet an enema not even a wipe I'm telling you if Cosby actually came back on that platform he would get me back he would I mean that is a voice of the people conservative homosexuals

for Bill Cosby's release Is Cosby in jail or is he Out. No, he's in jail. They opened him at jail, so he was like. Yeah. Oh, he was. Release 2021.

I forgot about that. Yeah, yeah. I forgot about that. He's thinking like right up out of there. He wasn't even in prison for like a year, was he? Well, Denny's been in jail for longer. Mm-hmm. I mean, you think they eaten his ass in jail or you think Diddy's eating ass?

I think he's doing a, I think he's having a great time. I think he's having a blast. I think he's probably. If it's someone like Diddy, prison can't be that bad. No. It's like, it's people in there that love your music. Arkelly too. Well, hold on.

Hold on. Diddy's music. Who the fuck loves Diddy's music? Old niggas in prison. You're right. Somebody's stupid enough to be a criminal in the 90s? Yeah, exactly. Somebody with a walkman in jail.

It's still riding with Diddy. And they're not listening to, I'm coming home. Yeah. They were at Summer Jam's 1997 and shit. Like that was it. What is Diddy? What is like, I guess, what even are his, like, missing you?

I'm missing you. Can nobody hold me down? Yeah. I still play that from time to time. That's not amazing. You know, he's on the greatest cuck anthem of all time, too. What's the, the Mario song? Yeah, yeah.

I don't want to know. I don't want to know. Yeah, which is maybe it's the craziest cuck song of all time. He's like, listen, go get fucked. Go get fucked. Keep it on the low. Like, listen. Because my heart can't take it.

I'm too delicate to know about you sucking other guys off. But keep at it. Just be cool. Just be cool about it. And if you're playing me, keep it on the low. That's insane. That's an insane life philosophy.

I'm curious who wrote that song. Not Niddy. Who? Because who was singing that? Mario Wining. But there was another rapper on that. It was Dittie was on it. Dittie was on it.

Was it Loon? Wasn't Diddy on it? Did he was on it. Yeah. What's Diddy's verse from that? Let's look for clues. Oh, yes. This is fun.

I mean, he literally thought he was like one of the top ten rappers dead or alive. And then that fucking when he just, the Godzilla soundtrack song where he's just doing the Led Zeppelin song. I don't want to know where you wereabouts or how you're moving. Oh, so he's a cuck in this too. I know when you were in the house and when you're cruising. It's been proven. I love you're abusing. And I can't understand how a man got you choosing.

So this is him being mad that he's getting... So Diddy at least shows a little fight as a cuck. Whereas Mario rolls over completely. And he's like, he gave you extra cheese, put you in the SUV. You wanted ice so I made you freeze. So Diddy's basically like, how dare you, you hoar. You hoar. And there's you hot like the West Indies.

I could have written this. This is a horrible verse. It's like, you can tell when he's gotten his shit ghost written and when he's like, you know what, Diddy's work in the pen this time? Because if it's not, then it's best you leave. Holla, yeah. So, Did he at least shows a little fight. He's like, bitch, you can leave.

Yeah, I, yeah. Does it say who wrote it? Imagine it was R. Kelly. I mean, it could have been. Now, R. Kelly's music is everywhere. I understand if a criminal is like, oh, R. Kelly's the man. Well, yes. Even law-abiding citizens secretly will listen to some R. Kelly from time to time.

Listen, off the record? Yeah, yeah. Turn the mics off. You put the mic real off the record. Yeah. I'll listen to one R. Kelly song, but only in airplane mode. So the stream don't count. And is it?

And is it? I still believe I can fly. No streaming numbers. Yeah. The world's greatest. You know, I've always had this idea that I think this is how we get to listen to his music. You let's hear it. Is if all of his music gets split up and it gets.

remade by John Legend and Genuine. John Legend. John Legends is insane. I believe. No. John Legend for the spiritual songs and Genuine for the freaky songs. I think that's a perfect background. The whole thing about Arkelley is that there was an edge even to the spirituals.

Like it made, like I believe I can, like there's some behind him. John Legend, you let him sing those. It sounds like church. It sounds like church in a bad way. Yeah. It sounds a little bit slave hymny. Yeah, yeah. But, R. Kelly's singing.

Not the help. It's giving the help. The help soundtrack. Right. It's like civil rights. Selma. Selma. Yeah.

Yeah. It's like John Legend makes music that you listen to in the back of the bus. Yeah. You know what I mean? Sure. But yeah, R. Kelly music does sound like he was wearing leather pants. Yeah. Yes.

No draws. No draws. Full of commander. Me and Elders did a drive. We, when, uh, when they had like ruined every airport and they were just canceling every flight like three or four months ago, whatever.

Okay, yeah. I was on the road, we were on the road in North Carolina, Greensboro. We had to drive back. Our flights got canceled. We drove through the night. We did the shows. We got done at like midnight

and we just drove to Baltimore and then New York the next night. So from like four, it was like a four or five hour drive. When things got really dicey, we threw on R. Kelly's, what mixtape was? Like,

The demo, his, the demo, the gangster girls from like 2011. I remember that. It's a great mixtape.

It's incredible. I was college. I remember this. It was like, every remix the best I ever had. Best I've had. Yeah.

Every girl in the world. I wish I could fuck every girl in the world. There was some great stuff. Every girl. And honestly, can I say that one did make me uncomfortable?

Because that was, that was like a criminal big like this. is my crime. I would love to fuck literally every woman, no matter what age. Even the ones who haven't been born yet. He's such a pedophile. He's trying to like fuck a guy's balls. He's like, there's

girl embryos in this jizz. Stop, have you heard that biggie lyric? That one biggie lyric or he's like, I wish I could suck your day. But you know what that is? That's a Richard Pryor line. Oh, that's right. Who was bisexual, but no one ever gave him credit for it. The first bisexual. stand-up comedians

That's like bisexual black man In the history of the world Mm-hmm That's true Couldn't be me But you know Imagine being

Yeah yeah that's awesome Somebody's dad's dick That's a lot Well depending on a dad Yeah Depending on a dad But not to Not because the girl

Was hot is what Alex is saying Just because the dad was hot I mean I was gonna be like Damn girl you're you fine You got a daddy Okay You got a brother No you got a daddy

You got a daddy We've all seen a hot dad Of course, of course. That always trips me up when you just, there's a hot girl and then you meet her dad and she has his face. And I'm like, oh, damn. Well, so, stop. Is this the same in the Greek community? When, like, in the black community, when someone tells you that you look like your dad, it's usually an insult.

Like, you look like your dumb-ass daddy. You know what I mean? Like, Tam, I look like my dumb-ass daddy. Really? You have your dad's face? Yeah. Because, like, I feel like a, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. But that is like a thing where, like, women who look like their fathers end up being gorgeous. And then guys who look like that mother. You see how he fixed it? Yeah. That's what they say. Well, they say and drop people, for some reason, you're like, the hottest guys have, like, slightly feminine features and the hottest women have slightly and trojanous features. And the examples they'll give is, like, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.

Like Brad Pitt kind of has, like, a girl's lip when he was young. Yeah. They had, like, full lips or whatever. And Angela and Jolie had, like, severe bone structure. But now their kids aren't. cute as you as you Well they're all adopted No no

There's one They got three kids Okay that's right There is one that I think I think like Looks just like Brad Pitt And I think Shiloh

I think Shiloh I think Shiloh's trans or something Oh yeah yeah You know there's something like that Going on in their family It's like one It's always one now If you don't have a trans kid

You do it wrong You need to have another baby All your kids are straight Wow that's crazy Sis Oh sis straight yeah You got all it's this kid You're doing it wrong.

You know what they wrong. Because if you're straight in 2026, that's gay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fully straight, you mean? Did you grow up getting whippings? I got a couple here and there. When you really fucked up, I would get... I used to get...

Lashing. I used to get the belt. Well, my parents would... My grandma would pretend... She just didn't have it in her to hit us. And then we were real pieces of shit. She would hit us with a shoe. What kind of shoe?

Like a slipper. Slipper. Class of slippery. really not a boot not a platform of hug there was one do you remember your last whooping like a last like well that's that one

was like my dad was kind of like I think he could sense that in like a year this would just be two men fighting yes so it really it honestly was a little too close to his heart wasn't in it no it was I might get my ass beat my last one he's a piece of shit he said this the playoff

he was like all right time to get my money's worth he back there stretching he fucked me up honestly And that probably really set back our relationship, I would say, for maybe a decade. Because he was a grown man with a fucking lacrosse stick just being like, I thought you were going to be home. I was like, and I felt I was pissed off

because I was like, I was like eating Chinese food with two girls. I was like, dad, I'm trying to be cool and get pussy. You should be proud of me. You should respect me for this. Help me get some. Literally. Tears in your lives. I was hanging out with.

chicks. Please, I want some pussy. Please, sir. May I have some pussy? Literally it pissed me off. I can't remember

the last whooping than I was. I remember mine. It wasn't even a whoopin. It was the day my mom realized that the belt wasn't working anymore. So like I had just,

it was like when I was starting to get taller than her. And I remember like I had done something. I know I did something. Yeah. And she hit me with the belt

and I was getting annoyed more than it was. was like, ouch. And so she backed up and I started balling my fists up. Oh, my God. She was like, oh, you want to hit me? And she got in my face like, like I was some random nigga on the street. Change tactics.

She dropped the belt and then she punched me in my chest. Good for her. Good for her. She was like, oh. And that's how you raised young good black boys. Punch them in the chest. Good gay black boys. She was like, oh, you want to.

hit me? I was like... She pushed you in the chest and you were like, I don't even like pussy no more. Then when my dad hit me for the first of my dick got hurt. Whoa, we need to talk

as Freud about this. I was like, you don't even know what you just did. My dick got hard is crazy. Oh my God, so you do like dance. You liar. You're a liar. That's why. I don't have no sleeves.

I couldn't see you. I mean, I could see you being a bad little kid, but I couldn't see you get you. You were probably an annoying child. Girl. You were probably an annoying energetic child. I got whooped. I was an annoying child because I would hear my parents talk shit about people.

And then when the person would come visit, I would tell them. Oh, you were that kid. I'd be like, oh my God. My mom said, you don't have a husband. My mom said you got so fat your husband left. Oh, my God. What goes on in his house stands in the house. And throw me in the back.

What goes on his house stairs. in this house stays in this house and you're like no but goes on this house is for the streets my parents are gossips so i would listen and be like this is the guy that can't read i heard you ain't got no job they said you don't work that's fucking awesome and you getting cheated on by your wife yeah you got the tea spilling tea were you bad in other in other sexes me uh yeah i used to steal i was a klepto as a kid I had a long career, too. I could have went pro.

She was a criminal. I could have robbed the loof. What were we taking? Oh, I used to steal from like the school store. So I used to steal everything. Pencil erases, fans. And then I was stealing snacks out of kids' backpacks that I liked. Oh, you was at school getting crazy.

I think his backpacks. Well, because my parents always, my mom always gave us really healthy snacks. Right. cheese and the little red stick. Of course. My parents weren't giving me that. So, since it's that, what was your cereal looking like

at the crib? Like Cheerios and the, unflavored? Corn flakes, but we could put a spoon full of sugar in them. Oh my God. But my mom would get us like golden grams and stuff like that.

I mean, it was interesting. It's still like elderly cereal. Cinnamon toast crunch. I remember she got that. I ate that every day for like a week. But no snacks. She allowed you to have a good. cereal but no snacks. Yeah, she was sending me to school with like yogurt and apple slices, a tangerine. It's like they eat in popcorn. She pushed you into crime. Their teeth are falling

out. I want that. Yeah, absolutely. She did push me into crime. Because then when I got to high school, we were stealing from the mall. We were going to Target. My friend was dropping us off like, team one, go. Half of us would jump out. And then she'd be like, team two go. And she was the driver, so she'd be like, I'm not going to go in and steal, but make sure you get something. for me too. Right, of course. So that's how we... She's got the getaway. Yeah. Of course. We, when I was, when I was in middle

school, I was on the basketball team. Oh. We had this, uh, listen. I was not playing a lot. I was also, I was also in the middle school basketball team. I was also on the middle school basketball team. I was also on the middle school basketball team. I was only on the team because my mama was fine and the coaches wanted to see her every day. That was truly it.

Really? That's what I believe. I'm like, there's no way. I'm pretty sure there were like several other boys that could have been on the team that I got over me, but my mama was gorgeous. So they were like, I think there were any Forrest Gump situations in your life, Alex? Absolutely. What's the Forrest Gump situation? Well, Forrest Gump couldn't get into school because he was mentally disabled. And let's just say his mom had a little agreement with the principal that got him into school.

Damn. My mom always saying. I don't think my mama was like giving it up, but she was making them believe it. She was alluding to like, you know. Sure, who knows. You got to put him on the thing. That's how you get what you want. You got to let them think they got a chance.

But we were on the team and it was like around Christmas time And we had like a social study teacher Who would like sell Potato chips to us Like for like 50 cents to a dollar They're like a dollar Something like that

And so we knew That's also that the teacher did that That should be for a kid Yeah Like you could always tell the kid Who's gonna become a drug dealer Because he was the one in elementary school That was like

We'd buy wholesale chips And send them to I used to sell c burns CDs That's like put songs on CDs The CD kid was always a great kid For CD Alex is jammed with a C.

No, there's a guy. There's the CD kid for sure. I was a CD kid. I didn't have a CD kid. Oh, wow. You bought your fucking, your albums as a kid? No,

I guess my brother was the CD kid because he would just, you know. Oh, you had the burner at home. Yeah. Oh, see, this is before, this is a time where you didn't ride around, kids. Let's tell you about an old time back in the day

when we had these little machines. Because like some kid would have like the eight CD burner. Yeah. Lime wire. Kazah. Yeah. Cause I. Of course.

Oh, okay, speaking of that, please. I don't know if I've ever told you about this, this dad in prison from home stories. But when my dad came home from prison, he was married and like, I used to go over their house and stay or whatever. And they had this,

they had lime wire because I on their computer, on their home computer. So just like I was doing at my house, I was like downloading gay porn. And burning it to a CD? And you would have to let it go overnight, right? because at least I did It was slow

Yeah, sometimes in the video was like a long time I would fucking I would tie up the phone line all night so if someone had to go to the hospital

or It was just to see Yeah yeah just to see ladies sucking dick and shit Yeah so

And I would wake up You could tell when I was downloading pornography because I would be like A beautiful day I'm up at like 7 a.m.

Ready to check the progress Christmas morning It's like 44% something happened There was a Meanwhile your mom had been It was a Yeah yeah

Yeah yeah yeah Damn But I downloaded it It to my dad's house computer And so Didn't think of it Leave I remember I was driving

I was driving from like I was driving in a car My mom from like IHop or something like that And we get a call from my dad Your dad Who also like doesn't really Like just got out of prison

Doesn't really know How the technology works He just finds gay born on his computer Like he's like, are they putting this on computers? His wife, jingies. My stepmother found it. Okay. They called my mom, we were in the car.

They called my mom and they were like, oh, is Alex looking at gay porn? Because it's all this gay porn on our computer. It saved on the desktop. It was like the internet history and shit. At the time, at the time, I just was not aware of like deleting the search. So my mom was like, she almost crashed the car. She was like, are you looking at gay porn? at their house.

You know I was like, oh, my step-sister did that. That ain't got nothing to do with me. You said, he did rifle it. That couldn't be me? I lied all. Your mom never, so at this point your mom doesn't know you're gay

or she doesn't know you're looking at porn? What are we talking about? This was like, this was like eighth grade, seventh eighth grade. So I'm sure there were like little things here there, but you definitely wouldn't have been okay with it. Of course.

She cool with it now, though. She cool with it now, though. Which is kind of crazy. I'm like, girl, you are not who you were. I mean, I think that's the thing. Our parents get older and then they get, like, softer and, like, chill. Yeah. I don't know, not my mom.

The older my mom gets the more religious she's becoming. And it's like, girl, why are you reading this Bible again? Yeah. It's not a good book. It's the same story. We get it. He dies in the middle, not even at the end. Yeah.

How does it end? What's the end of the Bible? Don't ask me, I'll read that. It ends with, like, the world ending. Oh, that's the final chapter. Yeah, yeah, Revelation. Come on. Come on vacation Bible school.

Tell us how to Bible in. I did, but I did go to vacation Bible school, but do not remember most of it. Listen. Uh, yeah, Revelation is the end. Okay. That's why those people be outside with a sign that said, the end is near. And it's like, it's been near for 59 years. The end has happened like for several decades.

Yeah. Yeah. I, we're probably not too far away from like, because there was like a, like in the 1800s, every like five years, there was a cult that's like, world's ending. I feel like we've got to be getting close to those times. I think we're close. Yeah. I mean, how many people did COVID wipe out?

COVID got rid of a lot of people. COVID, how many people you think died from COVID? COVID did this big one. Well, I remember before when I opened for, I've told a story a bunch of times, but Eddie Griffin. And he was open for Eddie Griffin.

Way back in the day. I've heard this story. Yes, I know this. And he was really, now he didn't know about COVID, but he thought Obama was going to force us to take vaccines that turned us into zombies. Go on that Instagram account.

I'm sure when COVID happened, this all falls right into Eddie Griffin's version of how the world's ending. And I mean, you know. I didn't know he was so ticky, tiki, boon. Oh, girl. I'm telling you go on that Instagram account. You go, your algorithm going to be all fucked up. I don't know.

I don't even mess with my algal because I like it how it is. I heard he be at the cellar cutting up. Cutting? He was, he was, he pops up with like a big ass security guard apparently. Yeah, I remember that guy. I was in the lounge like a year ago. Dude, I want to go.

He was like there talking so loud during the middle of my set. I was like, and I could see him. I'm like, what the fuck are you doing? Yeah. I was an undercover brother. Great movie. Great movie. By the way, I just rewatched Corky Romano.

Great stuff as well. That's that period of Chris Catan. Really good stuff. What happens to that, man? He's still out here. Yeah. She's not going good. He had like a real bad neck injury or something like that

And then he got addicted to some type of medication Pain medication Alex, you know everybody's business I'm you when you were four No, I saw him at Skankfest like two years ago He was on the lineup He was on the lineup And he was like having to be like

Recession indicator He had to be walked He had to be walked, I mean He had to be like assisted walking around And stuff It didn't look good I saw him at the 50th too And it was the same situation

He had a walker with the tennis balls underneath it? He was almost, no, that was Cher. No. Cher had a young-ass boyfriend. She still a young-ass fiancé. We saw Cher.

We saw her. We saw her at the S&L after party and she passed by me and Alex was right here. Right next to you. She was like this close to my face, right? And I was like, I'm going to say something. I don't know what I'm going to say but I'm going to figure it out. Of course. So she walks by saying, hey, Cher, you look fab. She looked at me. She didn't make any facial

expression. Right through Marie. She literally was like, and then her 32-year-old boyfriend pulled her away. And Alex is in my ear. Hey, Cher, you look, have. It was one of the rare moments where, because, you know, Marie interacts people

and they give her everything. So it was the one time where I saw somebody be like him. I would love to see that. She was at here. I would have loved to see you. You should have been like, girl, let's okay. Rihanna's in my DMs every day. You don't even look that good.

bitch. I was talking to your boyfriend. We have the same initials me in shares, man. A.E. Fun fact. Okay. That's barely a fun fact. But Alex, don't start even really your initials. Okay, okay. Well, don't be getting into my business now. We're supposed to get everybody else's business.

Not the stage name. Wait. But wait. I know you. Mr. Hey, hey, hey, bleep that out. Bleep that out. Bleep that out. No, you will not. Yeah.

We have the same initials. So also, that's Amber Rose's ex-baby daddy. Oh, really? Like, yeah. Yeah, so you know how Amber Rose has that tattoo across her forehead now? Yes. It's about Cher's fiancé?

Is he her fiance? Or whatever. I think they got engaged. I thought, okay, they were engaged. Let me tell you something. Before that interaction, I saw Cher, they were sitting at the same table with eating dinner. And I saw her breast

I saw her brother I was like cutting up her food for her Hey man You want to be in the will or not What do you think I'm paying you for? And you better feed it to me You better blow on it

Before you put it in my mouth I was like I could not believe what I was seeing Oh I could But I was just like Oh okay I wasn't supposed to see that You want to cash in

some of sunny Bono stocks Then you better Cut up that fucking chicken cutlet Do you think you could do that When you become an older lady? If I'm old and I have a young I'm old, so never be old. Never.

A vampire. If when I'm old and I have a young, a young boo. Like you're like pushing on 80, would you have like a young, young thing? I could actually see that. Yeah, I could do that. Yeah. I think I'll be able to do that. I could definitely see that for you.

And I'm still going to be wearing crop tops. With grommets on them. Loose skin, just like. Yeah. I think that's the, like, when you're old, you should be allowed to do whatever you want. I fully agree. I think there's like two ways you could go as an old person. You could be like chilled, stoner, like old person that don't.

give a damn or you get like real like angry and like get off my porch type old i think i'm gonna be the cool old yeah you got it you gotta go you want to be a chill old person and then you decide like you know what kind there's also different types of chill people right like the stoner one that's another one the i think there is classic grandpa grandma is a great one too get fat as shit wear plaid whittle you know what i mean socks with sandals socks with sandals baking cream incredible desserts. You don't cook anything savory anymore. You're purely a dessert.

Walk around the house with your robe open, just tities loose. Yeah, hell yeah. Sounds awesome. You're going to be greeting young men at your door like Samantha Jones. With my old young nudes in the foyer. Yeah, you like that? That's me.

I still look like that. They're like, okay. Titty's on the floor. Where you want me to put your Amazon packages? Where you want me to set this dialysis machine up? Yeah, I guess I could definitely see that. I guess I could see you just cycling through and never actually having a meaningful relationship too, you know? No, I think this is the year.

I'm ready to, I'm ready to, because every guy I date, the guy after him is better. Okay. So I feel like this is the year that I meet the person I'm going to spend the rest of his life with. Because you know, mend off faster if you push him down to stage. Sure. Oh, also it's like great. Like I think about that too where it's like, yeah, I mean, you don't want to be the second person in a loving marriage.

You want to be the one that dies first. They have to deal with all the bullshit. You know what I mean? I'd rather die and then I don't want to fucking plan the love of my life's funeral. Elders, you're going way before your wife. You're definitely going first. Yeah. You're like a fucking great day and they live till nine.

Me too, by the way. Fat as shit. Whoever I end up with, she's probably going to be younger, too, and I'm fat as shit. Like, I'm dying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going to share. I feel they're going to find me,

dad, somewhere. They're going to find you, Dave? Oh, no. You're a crime. The prison dad. The prison dad obsession is going to go too far.

I think I was just like, be in my home alone and just be like, they're going to find you when they do a wellness check? Like, no kids. No, no, no family. You have a dog or something. dog with like big droopy ears.

I can't have a cat is going to eat me. No, because a cat will, yeah. That cat will eat you. I don't know. Yeah, what do you think about, Alex? I want to be old, man, but see, here's, okay, here's, okay. Yeah. So when I was like 17, 18, 19, even in my early.

That's a lot of ages. Yeah. Like, just in my younger phase. Late teens. A lot of older guys were used to hit on me. Like, I used to always get, like, guys in their 30s and 40s, shit, and even 50s talking to me. And so I would, I would invite that. I'd be like, okay, yeah.

Let's just say 18. and 19 for the purposes of this podcast let's just go ahead and leave 17 out of this well we were just talking about Arkellie so it's on scene yo I legit had

when I was like when Facebook first started you know I was like 16 17 so I'm 16 yeah let's okay you're going the wrong way Alex no no I'm telling you I had there was consistently and this is bad but I used to have a dude that would like message me on Facebook who was like

well into his 50s being like happy birthday are you 18 yet. Oh, wow. You should say send me money for my birthday. Yeah. I'm almost taking. I used to get that kind of attention, but I also didn't like shy from it. I'd be like, yeah, I'm fucking this old, dude, whatever you don't just like feeling myself. And now that I'm 37, my taste is kind of gone in reverse to younger. Oh. But not that damn young. Not sure. Okay, Drake. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Drink. Let me tell you something. I was, when I was in Austin, they, I didn't realize, gosh, I forgot that that's like a college town. Right. So I would go to these bars and hang out and like they would have signs that say like minor cover. And I was like minor cover. Who?

It was like, oh, these are 18. These bars around here are 18 and up. So you be walking around and all these young dudes, you know, sometimes they were trying to talk to me. I'll be like, I need your ID. I know you got up in here. One time one of these little boys gave me, they gave me the ID.

I could tell it was fake. I was like, this is fake. This guy tried the fake ID so you can suck you off. I was like, I was like. It said, it said, And Alex said, I like some big love. Listen, he gave me that ID.

I was like, look, I'm not about to tell on you or nothing, but you got to get the fuck out of my face. I don't know how old you are, but you cannot talk to me. No, I refuse. Respect. I refuse. Alex, you can't gather in them. I did.

You're not going to go Josh Gitt. You're not going to get the same fate as Josh Giddy is what you're saying. I mean, you know. I would do it. An NBA player who, like, met a girl at a club. And she was underage, but he's like, you know. You're not going to catch me slipping on that Not whatsoever

But I will say I would do it I would do it I would do it The David Geffen way Which is? Did he kill his fucking No no That's a different

That's a different Dave The Disney Is he Disney? What's this? Some kind of He's one of them Overlords Yeah

He got Oh by the way Doing a private text Couldn't have looked it up Or anything like that He also famously Was married to share Oh really?

He got married this year back in the day. Like, back in the day. But he's gay. Oh, so. Oh, he went to Brooklyn College. That is maybe the gayest thing you could. If you had to marry a woman and you picture, that's the gayest choice possibly. Have you heard?

Have you seen his documentary? Maybe Liza Minnelly is gay. He's worth $9.2 billion. Yep. Hey, David, if you're watching this. Oh, yeah. Donovan. A spoon feed you some states.

He don't want you since you want me. You want me. Dave. Dave. What was David Geffing up to? What's the David Geffing up to? to this guy, Donovan Michaels, this black guy. And they just got a divorce last year.

They met on like seeking a range of, the Seeking Arrange website. Yep. And he was like suing him for like a whole much of money. Holy shit. Wait, who sued him? The ex-husband because he wants, he wants, I think he was asking for like $200,000 something like that. He wasn't asking for a lot.

$200,000. I have something like that. I had some $8 billion. You only get $200K? I don't know. I'm not trying to be greedy. Just give me a little crumb off the towel. I don't know all the team.

a couple million bucks. Do you guys remember Mariah Carey was dating some billionaire years ago? And after they broke up, she sued him for wasting her time. And she won. She won. Wow. I think it was more than $200,000. Good for her. Yeah.

She said, hey. It does piss me off when just like, yeah, every, like how many billionaires just get to marry these women where it's like, these guys are fucking, there's no way these guys are cool. They just have that much money. But also think about these women. If you've been famous, since you are 17, 18 years old, whatever,

everyone around you is people that you pay. Everyone around you is just making you feel like every decision and everything that you say is gold. So like they need to be with somebody like this because, you know, I don't know, these two people need each other. The rich guy needs the young diva. Well, yeah, yeah, I guess.

But you're saying is like the only way you can recreate like a traditional dynamic if you're that like rich and famous of a woman is by getting somebody who's so rich he doesn't even consider you rich is that what you're saying? No, I'm just saying like he's used to people kissing his ass

and he can provide the lifestyle that she wants. Okay, okay, I see, I see. You know what I mean? Sure, sure, sure. Do you believe the myth that Mariah Carey walks around with ginger ale bottles that get emptied out and put wine inside of them so she can walk around her public and take six of one? I've never heard that, but I've heard it. I've heard that

I believe she drinks champagne like his water. Like his water. Yeah. I bet she puts caviar on her ego waffles. Interesting. Well, good for her. I'm really just pissed because Salma Hayek is married to some billionaire guy. Yeah, the L'Orielle guy?

I don't know. Or something like that. He's like one of these moguls. You thought Salma Hyac was going to settle down with you? No, but I would like, not me, but I would, look at this fucking guy. It's just some fucking old guy. Oh, yeah. She dating him still.

Oh, yes. Yeah, Stavkins tapped that. What I'm saying is I would have liked it to be an artist. Someone I could have seen like, oh, maybe if I were the same age and I met her, it could have happened. But this guy, I got nothing in common with a billionaire. But she's the artist. She's the creative. He got to be a little businessman.

I guess. And he has to actually be a big businessman. Stavv, I still want to see you with an older black lady. I would love that. Well, how much older are we doing? It's up to you, King. Older than me, but not like 55. I don't see you with somebody older.

What kind of black lady? If you can name any like black lady to give stuff. I'm not giving stuff a black lady. I wouldn't do that to my sister. Not during black history, but not. Not especially not during black history. Maybe in March for the McReed. Well, Greek Independence Day, March 25th.

Right, right. For his birthday. My birthday is February 11th. You know, it is Black History Month. He has to have a dirty birthday. I don't want a black lady. He's thinking of him. a young Bimbo Beach with

Big Titties. Okay. She doesn't need to have an ass. Does she need to have a little? You know how I can see you? No. You know how I can see you? It's going to be a long back.

It doesn't have to be. I would prefer not a long back, but yes. You know how I can see you with? Ooh, and I know you would agree with this. Go ahead. I know. Get ready. Okay.

Stop and Kim Whitley. Kim Whitley. No. I don't think so. An older black lady. No. I love Kim Whitley actually. I do love Kim Whitley actually.

I do love. I love Kim Whitley. And I would love a feeling with Kim Winley. But no, I don't think that's who I'm married. She's beautiful. And Jack Kaye. Jack Kaye, hey, hell yeah. Jackay signed me up.

I'm in on Jackay for sure. If you don't think I was into Jack Kay as a youth, you're out of your mom. I'm writing a movie with you and Kim Whitley as a romantic partner. I feel like one of the sisters sisters is single. You're one of them. A Tia, T, A and or Tamara. Tamara. No, I don't see style with an old black lady because an old black lady doesn't want to, like, change who she is.

I don't think they're interested in me. Yeah. I don't think it's a, they're interested in you. I think you, I think you underestimate him. Alex, Alex, you overestimate. I'm here to pump up. I am here to pump up the white man. Thank you.

Yeah, you know what? Do that on your own time. What's you do in the comfort of your bedroom? Conservative, black homosexual, Alex English. I get comfy. I'm here to pump up the white man. First of all. That's gay

I get closer and closer to that Every time I come on this podcast And I'm getting there I'm getting that I'm getting that Fox News invite at some point When he says old black lady He talk about him Yeah

Okay okay fine A romcom with me and stuff Yeah that's not bad I like that What's the meat cute I like that We could figure it out I'm not doing this much

But yeah you're right It's probably somebody younger I'm immature You know what I mean I like eat all that kind of shit. It's just someone, the best relationship I've ever had is somebody who was like five years younger than me, six years younger than me.

Okay. That was kind of right in the Q zone because it's like they're, we're about the same maturity level of that point. Yeah, because men don't hit emotional maturity until they turn like 42. Yeah, we're still getting there. We're still getting there over here. That's terrible. I don't know who's doing PR for straight men, but they're doing a terrible job.

Yeah, that actually checks out. It's me. And still we rise. Yeah. Thank you. All right. Well, listen, if you are a big-titted woman of any ethnicity, a little younger than me, I'm interested.

Hit me up. I see a little Latinos for Trump. I would not like a Republican wife. I'm not interested in that. You don't want a little Melania on your arm? I don't want that. She has an accent. She don't really understand English that well.

But her booze is big. I don't have a problem with foreign. but just, you know, I don't need a fucking... In these trying times... In these dark times, I don't need a Republican girlfriend. Okay. I'm not... Sidepiece?

Republican sidepiece? Yeah. That's not bad. Because they know how to keep their mouth shut. They know how a Republican woman understands the power dynamic of being a sidepiece. There's honor in that. You know what I mean? You know, maybe I introduce her to a rich guy that she marries later.

You know what I mean? That's kind of... Because she is going to leave you for... Of course. you as a stepping stone. And that's great. That's fine. I don't want to long term either.

People don't tell you who they are immediately, you know, when they first. Yeah, you meet their representatives. I hooked up with this guy years ago, and by the time I got back, by the time I, I like, you know, putting my stuff on. I looked around. I was like, oh, this thing is a cop. This thing is a cop. Basically of the same thing.

Oh. I saw, I saw like a NYPD certificate. I was like, oh, let me get out this house. I'm like. NYPD certificate is crazy because you don't even really have to go to school. They said, hey, it's a little training program for six months. I was looking at the pictures of the round. I was like, oh, you're a cop.

Oh, gosh. Let me get a body here. You didn't ask no questions. I banged a cop by accident. No, you did it on purpose. You banged them on purpose. He was a cop by accident. I've never had sex with a cop and I never will.

Some of them be fine, but it's never worth it. Yeah. You know, in videos that pop up when you see like fine officers. Actually, you know what? That's not true. I went on a date with a detective. Oh, detective. I went on a date with a cop.

And how'd it go 50-50? You guys split the check? No. No. Absolutely not. Well, we were in the car. He came to pick me up, which is something I never do. But he came to pick me up. And I was like, what do you do?

And while he was driving, he was like, I'll tell you when I park. That's no good. There's dead body's in the trunk. I'll tell you when I park. His little lights flickered. He was like, whoo. And so we part. And he's like, the buildup is, I'm like, what is he about to say?

And he goes, I'm a cop. And I was like, oh, and he was like, I'm a detective for the special victims unit. And I was like, okay. Stabler. Just like that, you back in the game. Banging tutuola. I didn't bang him. I can't hook up with a cop.

I just felt like, specifically this dude, like his job felt like interesting because we've all seen it on TV. But it's like the kind of cop where you're like, This should exist. Not every cop should, but like, like, these kinds of crimes. Like, I do want someone investigating these horrific crimes. Yeah, but when he started talking about work, he got this, like, far away look in his eyes. And I was like, oh, he's seen some stuff. That's a good point, too.

And then when he dropped me off, he gave me as a gift, pepper spray. He said, you're going to need this. It's crazy out here. I was like, I said, okay. Those aren't the vibes you want. No. No, no, no. That's scary.

Interesting. It's still in the pack. I still have the pepper grink. Good luck out there. He said, be safe out there. Okay. Thanks, you get home safe. Well, you drop me off.

All three of us have a wealth of experiences and a wealth of knowledge. And I think it's time we applied that to our callers. What do you think, Elders? Woo. Come on, segue. Thank you. I'm a professional. That's why they pay you the big bucks.

Look at this big-ass window right here. That's not a poor person window. No. Far different. for the windows we grew up with. Yeah. Right. I miss these people.

Hit us with it, Elders. Hi, Stovey and esteemed guest. I've got a bit of a unique one today. So I'm trans, and I take testosterone, given as injection, once a week. Nice. And I live with this guy. And we kind of work out in our home gym around the same time. And recently he's been like, yeah, man, you're putting on a good.

good amount of mass. You're putting on some, some muscle there. I can, I can really see that the, the T's working. And I'm like, oh, yeah, man, thanks. And he's like, you know, is that really, like, kind of cheating? And I'm like, well, no, I take the amount to get me to, you know, to be, to be like, not transphobic, but such a gym bro that you're like, it's not fair that you get fucking testosterone. I don't. You're getting jacked faster than me. I'm fucking pissed. Keep going, eldest. The amount to get me to, you know, where, like, a cis man's testosterone drawn levels will be nothing higher or anything like that like Royds would do. He was like, oh, okay, cool, cool, cool, cool.

And then recently I was going through like my stores of testosterone and I noticed that I think I'm missing a few vials. I think a few vials might have been maybe snatched by my buddy here. That's so funny He's also been putting on a lot of extra muscle recently Like a noticeable amount At a short amount of time And I'm pretty sure Ome here is

Kind of like munching off my supply How do I confront him Got a fight on? About this First of all I need to re-up on them vials Before you confront him Rehap on the vials And then when you get big, beat his ass

Yeah, that's a tough one. It's a fair fight at that point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does he have any more eldest? That was basically, he also says, like, also if he wants any, I know guys where I could get like roids for him if he's interested. But yeah, it's basically. I'm curious if the homeboy, the cis homeboy, if he would just have asked,

I'm wondering how generous this person would have been with their testosterone. They probably, he probably would have given him, he says he's got hookups for regular steroids. But I think this isn't, it's also not, like, I don't know how hormones work, but I assume you don't just want the same tea that a trans guy is getting, right? You want something else. I mean, I'm sure it just helps. Any testosterone helps.

But I guess first thing I would say is make sure he did steal from me because I'm really forgetful. And I have definitely thought, I'd be like, somebody's fucking stealing. And then I just find like $800 just in like a fuck. There's some khakis. And I'm like, oh. Check your pants pockets, bro. Check your pants pockets for your mouth. Maybe you took some amount and forgot.

And it's such as I know on some level, I'm probably wrong, but I'm like, where the fuck is it? You know, and you just want to blame someone. So it's like, where I've lost like a jewelry before and I'm like somebody. And it's like, of course it's me. I'm fucking forget. Oh, that's why you're not wearing a chain today? I got the chain. I'm talking.

Let the people see. Put it outside. I'm modest. I'm modest. I'm a modest guy. So I would say, make sure he's stealing from you. But also, what is this relationship?

It's your home gym? Yeah, it's like a roommate. So it's your roommate? He said you live with this guy. Yeah, yeah. So if it's your roommate, then yeah, you got to. Because if it was just a guy you go to the gym with, I would be like, never go back to that gym. Right.

It's not worth confronting something. But if it's someone you live with, if it's a roommate. You got to nip this in the bud. Okay. Here's what I'm going to say. Please, please. Go back to the doctor. Get some estrogen.

Okay. I've made a huge mistake, doctor. If he starts to develop tities, he's dipping into your hair. Actually, this is genius. This is like chemical warfare almost. You're still in my status. I need this to be who I am. And this voice starts getting real high.

I love this. Got some juicy tities. His hair's coming in nice and thick. It's got juicy. Big bigger. And he's like, I just don't know why I try. He's right. You could be like, mm-hmm.

Catch a bitch. Yo. Yeah. That's crazy. You are crazy. That's genius. I think it's crazier to take somebody else's hormones. Prescription hormone.

It's insane. You know what's funny? What if he did confront the roommate and was like, have you been taking and taking my stuff? and he's like, fesses up to he's like, yeah, but you didn't do the dishes last week. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought it was only fair.

Hey. Yeah, I mean, are you behind on your rent? As if so. I'm for a night. Who's paying all the utility? I love Marie's idea. And I would say hide all your tea and switch it out with fucking,

either estrogen or even just like, even something that would make it clear. like one of those people that take methylene blue that turns you into a fucking smurf for some shit what? There's like that's like a prepper like that's like another conspiracy theorist things like you think if you take a specific chemical

it'll cure you of everything but also turns your skin blue Okay elphaba If he starts looking like He's taking your stuff Getting shorter I love the answer thing So yeah I say do

I say do trickery I say do chemical warfare Yes. But in the small chance you're a fucking pussy and you don't want to do that. I would say, yeah, you just, like, how do you confront someone who's actually stealing your shit? You'd be like, hey man, I was like looking at,

I was like, I keep track of all this and I'm missing a couple of miles. Did you grab some? Because you could even be like, if you wanted the game, because he says he's got a hookup. Be like, if you want some shit, let me know. I know a guy who can sell you steroids, but like, this is specifically for me, this is.

But he stole it. He knows you know a guy Because you got the supply I'm just trying to think about the situation of As a roommate How do you A roommate who's stealing from you in this specific Say put your name on it

Because you know how like roommates will go in the fridge And he just put your name on it Put it in Tupperware in the fridge And put your name on it The question is how mad do you get Because you could be This could also be a thing where you're like Hey you fucking stole from me

I don't want to be your roommate anymore But if you're trying to be I guess I think you're well within your rights To be like Okay did you steal for me Because if so We can't fucking be roommates anymore It's my fucking

They're my hormones You fucking piece of shit You know how hard it probably Is to transition right now Fucking masked ice age is just fucking Killing people Yeah I'm pretty sure hormones are hard to get Yeah with the tariffs

Yeah you slow enough my ability To defend myself Yeah Get your Chinese hormones from Ali Express. From Timu. If you starts

growing a tentacle, you know. I would be pissed. I would be legitimately pissed. Yeah. You sound pretty calm. So do you want, it's about how you want to approach it.

Trickery is our number one approach. We've said that. But you could just be like, hey man, do you fucking steal my shit? That's insanely fucked up. You owe me this amount of money. And please don't ever do that again.

Or you could just, or if you want to be chiller about it, you could be like, seems like like Tate you took my shit obviously you owe me some money it's like but if you want I can put you in touch

with this guy but it's just up to you I mean I think if I were you a roommate stealing from you is kind of a deal breaker yeah you can't trust him anymore even if it's your boy

it's like and I guess this is really weird because it's like he has some kind of weird like hormones envy yeah and I guess

you could see a psychological situation where the guy guys like, I'm so embarrassed. I did that. I fucked up so bad, like whatever. But even still, that's like a roommate stealing from you. I'm trying to think how close to friends you are because if Eldis like lost his mind and stole a hundred bucks for me, it wouldn't ruin our relationship because we've been friends forever. I would make fun of him for the rest of our lives. But like we could get over it. But are you that close with this person where you get over them stealing your fucking medicine to get jacked.

They stole two vials. Yeah. Yeah, what's that cost? I have no fucking clue. It's probably expensive. I'm just curious what the VINMO would look like two syringes. Yeah, two syringes. Yeah, two syringes, fucking arms. The arm, the fucking biceps. The bodybuilder emotion.

Now, if he comes back and he's like, here's two grand. You know what I mean? Like, I fucked up, but I don't know, man. Those are your options. Those are your options. That's nuts, though, to steal from your fucking testosterone. You steal from your trans friend

because you're jealous. They're putting on muscle. We are in a New America. Like you're not transphobic. You're just a piece of shit. You're just a regular piece of shit. Is it transphobia

to steal somebody's hormones? I don't think it's a chesophobia. I think he's just a jealous. It feels a little hateful. I feel a little progressive if you ask me. I don't know.

I think it's a bit. You're getting big. I'm getting bigger. We are transphobia. We already live together. So that's already a huge leap from where we were as a society. Yeah, that's the funny thing.

He's not. Not in a technical sense, trans. Yeah, just because who trans don't mean? What does they feel from you? It's rude to take your drugs. It's actually equal opportunity thief. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's going to ocean's progressive. Yeah. He is progressive. This guy's pretty progressive for us. This is the most progressive hormone thief I've ever heard of. Next question, Aldous. Whoa, what the hell? Holy shit.

What the fuck's going on? Uh-oh. I think we know what it is. It's time? Yeah. It's time to Keep it twisted Oh my God

It's the fucked up Mother fucking Fucking ass Fucking crazy shitty ass Question of the week Brought to you by the little Fuckers

A Twisted Tea Oh my God Elvis what the heck Do we freaking have Today What's the twisted ass mother fucked up

question of the week Hi Stavi And Elvis And guest If there is one Um Here is my conundrum, okay? I have a roommate and we're like best friends and we've been living together for like six months now.

And he has recently discovered slash disclosed to me that his grandmother is worth like $13 million. And she's old as hell. And when she dies, he is obviously going to get like a ton of that money. Is he? And he has shared this with me. And I'm like pretty well off. Like I'm financially fine. Like we're remit.

I just, I have grown to be resentful of him. He keeps talking to me about like setting up a grant or like a scholarship to like get rid of the money and like donating it to charity. Okay. That's not like keeping it twisted. Like you got to buy a fucking water slide. You got to buy a big ass slide that goes right into a fucking vat of buffalo wings. And underneath that is like another pit of mermaids that you hire to suck you off. And the mermaids would be former Division II college swimmers that you put mermaid tails on.

Anyway, that's just something I'm thinking about for keeping it twisted. A grant. What the fuck? Motherfuck hasn't seen. By the way, that's what you say when you're at least a couple years away from the money. Let's see how fucking if this guy. are really setting up a nonprofit when $2.8 million hits

his fucking bank bank account. Anyway, keep going on this. Like, we're splitting the rent. You know, I don't know, but I'm just like, why aren't you buying me a car? No, bitch. He doesn't have the money yet. You know, you're his roommate.

You're his fucking roommate. You're not his wife. What the fuck are you talking about? He's your friend. He should buy you a car because his old, because his grandma married some rich guy. Let's be honest. I don't think is, I mean, I guess I'm being misogynous here.

But like, his family, he has family fortune and you're, you're keeping it too twisted right now. You know what? This is what happens when people are a little bit well off. Right. Because someone that came, we came from the gutter. We were like, no, please, please, let me make you food. Let me feed you. You know what I mean?

Where's my car? Yeah, where's my car? I let you use my Lulu logging. Where the fuck do you? Where's my car? Fuck you. People that are like men here. rich are the worst piece of

shit. Here's the crazy part. This guy's saying he wants to give his money a way to poor people and this fucking bitch is like, I'm kind of well off, but where's my fucking car? Fuck you, lady. You're keeping it too twisted. What the fuck? Keep it twisted.

Okay, sorry. And kind of ruining our friendship because... Rewen your friendship. You're not a friend. It's like such a class divide. He doesn't have the money. He doesn't fucking have it. The lady's still fucking alive. Keep going.

Making me hate him. And it's like, if we go to a bar together, I'm not going to buy you a drink. He does not have the money. You know, like, buy me a fucking drink. And so it's just like hard because, yeah, to be a generous friend. And it's like, I don't want to buy him anything. And then, I don't know. I feel like he also doesn't contribute to our household.

That's different. He grew up rich. I don't know what to do. about it or how to talk to him about it because he's like said that I'm one of the only people who've told about it. It immediately poisoned you against him. You wish.

Now look, would I like this guy? Probably not if I met him, right? Because he grew up, if he's set to inherit. Now, here's another thing I'm questioning. It's his grandmother. How many cousins does he have? And also like, why would it go to him and not like his, like, isn't there a, does this kind of go? You know, the money was not made in a respectful way.

No, no, certainly not. Some, you know, some factory. Something bad happened. Something bad happened. Almost no one gets rich in a good way. Especially not a grand mom. Not if it's a grand. Yes, absolutely not.

It was some fucking private prison that they were, family was running. Okay. But, okay, he doesn't have the money. He does not have the money. He hasn't gotten it. You don't even know how much he's going to get. She said $4 million. Look, I hear, I hear, yeah.

Okay, that's a lot of money. Yeah, it's, it is a lot of money. But, like, if she's so scheming and conniving, she's like, oh, he's not giving me the money. Like, get him to love you. Right. He'll write you into the will or he'll marry you. Like, you're not fucking. playing ball, lady.

You're not keeping it twisted. You're not keeping it too twisted in certain ways and not twisted enough in others. Yeah. Like, like, like, you're having all these ruminations without doing the fucking work. Yeah.

Can you get a dick suck or something? Like, you clearly want this to be transactional. Yeah, truly. But there's, look, and we are not, we're both,

we are not guys who usually support the rich in any way. But you are pocket watching in an insane way. This money has. nothing to fucking do with you. And the fact that he wants to set up some grants and not give it to fucking you, who's doing fine, who won't fine. You said you were well off also.

Yeah, your own... Fuck you. Father probably owns a car dealership or some bullshit. What the fuck are we talking about? Why do you see somebody else's mind? Look, he doesn't deserve it, but you don't fucking deserve it either. So who gives a fuck?

Now, if you want to keep it very twisted, go make his grandma fall in love with you. Go put on her... Go put on his grandpa's World War II uniform. and put on some prosthetics. Make this dementia having lady fucking sign over the will to you. That would be keeping it twisted. That would be twisted.

Or here's what you do. You go over to her fucking old folks home. You take a delicious, brood with real iced tea, 5% per volume twisted tea. You crack it open with grandma and you say, why don't you fucking, give me a couple thousand a couple hundred thousand.

What do you say, you old bitch? And she's going to be so delighted by the, real iced tea smooth taste of twisted tea that you might just get a little something out of it. This tea, the grandma will believe if you start lying like, he doesn't. Yeah, he talks shit about you at the apartment all the fucking time.

Get him out of the wheel as a matter of fact. Yeah. Have you not watched Succession? Yeah, come on. Come on. Come on. That's our advice to you. Keep it twisted.

Share an ice cold, ice, twisted ice tea. Share an ice cold twisted tea with grandma. maybe write yourself into the will get yourself into the will but other than that stop pocket watching stop being a hater you're not fucking poor if you were poor I would maybe understand it a little more

you're not fucking struggling is your friend good probably not but you don't you don't come off too good in this situation either so fucking chill out figure it out yourself and if you want to and don't stop him from giving it to people who need it through grants by the way that's the only good thing

that's been said in this whole thing he's lying he's not going to do that But don't, you should be supporting that. That's who deserves it more than you or him. In a just world, he doesn't get that fucking money. Poor people get that money. He gets a little bit, but whatever. Keep it fucking twisted, man.

Keep it twisted. Oh, fuck. Oh, shit. We're leaving the twisted zone. Holy fuck. Keep it twisted. Hi, Bobby. And awesome.

guest as well as eldest. So my boyfriend and I have been together almost a year and a half. Our first date, after we met on Hinge, he actually crashed his car because he was wearing flip-slops, which was hilarious, because when he sent me the picture, I thought he was for sure lying, and I sent it to my girlfriends. I was like, oh, there's asshole. Well, anyway, following more conversations, we had a three-hour and 56-minute phone conversation. That's insane Let's pause that real fast

That's one of the craziest things I've ever heard in my life Three hours and 56 minute You're on hole with Delta That's Sally Mae Mae man He's like let me explain Yeah And it just goes on

The crazy Yeah imagine a first hinge date Someone has a week They crash their heart Because they're wearing flip-flops And then you talk with them for four hours No no no I would never

Three hours and 50s six minutes Yeah yeah You're so right. Anyway, I'm putting a pin in, we're already in insane, in crazy territory, yes. Let's keep going here. And realized actually he wasn't lying.

He was a decent guy and months later, I actually co-signed on his new car. Whoa! We're two for two, baby. Three hour 56 conversation month, two months later, you co-signed on his fucking car.

Actually, that's three, for three because he also won't flip-lops on it. That's the most egregious thing I've heard thus far. He had his toes out? Cosigned a two-month relationship is nuts. Nuts. The dick must be good because he's confident and out of control. No, this seems like a hymbo with who's stupid and this hung and like good at fucking.

Sound like he's taking extra testosterone. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. All right, let's keep going. To help his credit. Long story short. Help his credit. He's a really good guy. We moved in together.

We love each other. He's the nicest, kindest, most thoughtful guy. Maybe he's a hymbo. And the only problem is, I really love oral. Hell yeah. Along with specs in general. Respect. And our intimacy is great.

I give him oral, but he always has some excuse for not precipitating and going down on me. Once you give a guy a Nissan maximum, he's got to eat pussy. Never buy a man a car. He will never eat your pussy again. He should be eating your pussy in the car. This is nuts. With the flip-flops on. Yeah, no pussy.

His feet should be a while. He should be like this. He should be in your ass too. You're so right. Beat up. Isha. You're absolutely correct. That's the exact position

he needs to be eating pussy in. Listen, and in the passenger seat. Oh, my God, dude. Okay, this is fucking nuts. Okay, let's hear out. But I got it. This girl to me feels like

she did not have a good male role model in her life. I mean, this feels like the kind of girl who does whatever for the guy she's dating. guy, girl. She kept saying he's really nice. How nice is this man? He wasn't, he's not nice enough to eat your puce.

No pussy eating after you co-sign the car. First of all, someone letting the girl they're dating for two months co-sign their car, he's a piece of shit. He's a complete piece of shit. That's why she whispering because she can't even talk aloud. I've actually, I'm not allowed to talk on the phone. She's in the car. She's in the car like this with the seat.

See that's a really nice guy. Like, I can't get it nowhere. He's a really nice guy. I love oral, but he won't give it to me. He's not nice. Yeah, that's not nice. A nice guy won't let you sit on his face. Put that on a t-shirt.

That's merch. Absolutely. Keep going, Eldish. I'm extremely hygienic. Oh, wow. Now we're talking about it. I don't smell. I even use like boric acid.

Borex. Gavoric acid. After the time of the month, which like, I'm clean. I don't have any odor down there. Okay, this girl's been gaslit to oblivion about her pussy's thinking. Where he doesn't want to go down. And before he would say like, oh, you know, this or that.

And he also is a smoker, so his nose is stuffed up. Smoker. She said he can't even smell me. She's shoving boric. He can't even smell. He got long COVID. The Marlboro has decimated his taste buds. Who doesn't even care?

Girl, put a vaping your pussy. I bet he'll eat it in. This is nuts. This is nuts. It's just ridiculous. And she's sad. My pussy is sad. My pussy is sad.

It's amazing. It feels the best. I feel bad for this woman. I've been bad for him. Go ahead and go to eat around. And make him understand that while I love him and it's not like an end-it reason. I don't want to stay together, of course. But like I need oral.

I give it to him. She's about to cry. He's making excuses why he doesn't give it to me. So definitely would appreciate your advice. Thanks so much for being awesome. And love your show. Love everything. This is really tough.

Leave him. Take that car, get in that car and that you bought and drive away. Put your stuff in that Ultima and go. Put it on Craigslist.

Get the money. You already lost the value, right? Just recoup some of it because once it's off the lot. Put it on Facebook Marketplace. Sell it to a guy who eats your pussy.

Put the car in your pussy on Facebook Marketplace. Put the pussy on Facebook Marketplace. Because ultimately, if you're not being pleased, actually, it's not, No matter how happy you are, you're not 100% happy.

Plus he's a smoker, so he smells bad. Yeah, I mean, listen, this is really a bad sign in general here because this person clearly doesn't care about your needs. You're clearly so kind. You go above and beyond. You co-sign on his fucking car and he won't. I mean, I know it's a joke, but I mean that. You helped him out so much in his personal life,

and he won't even, like, and reciprocate, by the way, she's sucking dick. So the way I would The number one thing to do here Is you got you you cut off Sucking Dick immediately right That's step one That's step zero

Before we even discuss The next steps There's no more dick sucking Until there's pussy And the fact that you bring up Hygiene I mean what do we Orick asses

What do we She keep that She keep that pussy detail Like the carci boy She gets a oil chair They're fucking They're fucking power washing The floor mat

New bright fluid every month. Literally, kind of watching the pussy. And he will not go down to her. That's insane. It's like this is... I want to eat her pussy at this country. Exactly. You've turned Alex bisexual.

You know how powerful? It's me and Mr. Pryor. Yeah, you know how powerful your story of sorrow has to be? Like, these are all bad signs in terms of selfishness in the relationship for sure. I have a hunch that you, this is, you're drawing a line here. but I bet you give way more than you receive in this relationship. She gave a car. She gave a whole lot of see it.

She gave three hours and 56 minutes of her life. This is what I think you should do. You know how when alcoholics get their cars back, they put a little breathalyzer to make the car start. Yes. You should put that. If he don't eat you out, he can't go out. Just right.

at the... You're on the dash. Put your pussy on that where the hazard light is. Put your pussuar on the dash, babe. Right next to the black ice, uh... Yeah, yeah. Maybe he'll smell it thin. Oh, fuck.

Yeah, dude, I mean, this is fucking nuts. And you just gotta... You don't suck dick at all. And you also are like, hey, what do we do it? Like, this is crazy. You gotta... I'm just like he keeps refusing to eat her pussy. I'm like, are you dating a black comedian in 1995?

She dated a damn comedy. She dated a Jamaican man. The spicy beef patties are incredible, but it just won't eat my pussy. And they've been together, what, she said, a year and a half? A year and a half. Girl, that's a long time to have a dry cat. Yeah. This is crazy.

And now, she's being penalized because she says she likes the whole deal. She sounds like she likes sucking dick as well. But you got to stop sucking dick. And you also have to. You got to give up their passions for a second. Yeah, exactly. Put your passions on ice. And you have to, you have to be more cognizant of how you allow yourself to be treated in relationships in general.

Because this is just a very obvious symptom. But I bet you, you know, you clean more. You maybe pick up dinner more. You're probably planning more shit. Yeah, there's probably other things that she's doing. This is probably part for the course. And on some level, I'm obviously not blaming you, but it's like you probably are so giving in a relationship and so serving that he's, He takes it for granted.

Yeah. And he just, he's like, oh, well, I don't ever have to do anything I don't want to do, even if it makes her happy. And it sounds like that's all she's asking for is eating pussy. She ain't asking enough. Also, in this day and age, as a grown man, you're not going down on women? It's childish behavior. Grow up. Exactly.

Grow up. This isn't being a bottom. You know what I mean? This isn't for a young man. You're not a young man anymore. Grow up. Be a top and eat some pussy and ass. If you're old enough to drive a car that someone else co-signed for you, you're old enough to eat some, you know what's the

craziest thing. Some posthoir. Yeah, I mean, I think, yeah, you got to grow up and, but you got to, you have to stand up for yourself a little bit in this relationship in general, I think. I think that's the big, this guy's a piece of shit, but you can't let him off the hook for this kind of stuff. So I know it was going to be some BS when she called in whispering. Yeah.

She used up all her time. He allows her an hour to speak to her friends and family. And podcast counts for that a week too. So she used a ball her time. He's literally sleeping next to her and she's like, hey. Hey, stop. And awesome guests. He's fucking...

This guy's great. He just busted. He's fucking at Mito started snoring. Yeah. She's making a sandwich. She's like, hey, stop. Yeah. So he's like nice, but he...

She's sitting on his face. He ain't doing nothing. Where the fuck is my meatball? Yo, that's what I think she should do. Put your pussy between two slices of bread. Try this. When he sleep, just like kind of... Just sit on his face and see what happens.

If we don't wake up like, I'm not, I'm not. I'm trying to sneak and get your pussy ate real quick. Just sort of like, Alex, I'm going to put his mouth is open. I'm going to write that technique. I'm going to try that technique to work. Sleep training. What else we got, Eld? I'm crying.

East Davy, the artist, he's a esteemed guest. Eldish decision in playing color. I know it's sound like a fucking retard, but that's kind of a fucking retard. but that's kind of why I'm calling in a so here's the problem. Basically my voice reaction or whatever is just absolutely fucked like no back stories

for you. I grew up in a hamlet in southern Manitoba Canada with just a small bit of parents and like sisters and cousins and stuff and kind of like a little commune I guess it's it. Commune. Just imagine like a couple trees and

church just surrounded by nowhere and everyone kind of sounded like me, eh? So yeah, that's why isn't that great. But yeah, we didn't have internet TV. I was about 15. I was homeschooled. So I didn't really know

we fucking signed this fucking crazy it. It was kind of like a little culty eco-chamber. You know, but now that I moved to a big city when I was 22, I'm 27 now, I got real self-conscious and

kind of like crippling self-consciousness. I guess you'd say, so, you know, people make fun of me and shit, but like, I'm I'm 6-4, man, I'm completely fucking shredded. This guy's 6-4 and shredded? We found who's stealing the T? Okay, keep going, Aldous.

I should be fucking crying like a baby in the snowy. That's okay, man. 6-4 shredded guys can be sad, too. I'm crying like a baby in the snow, hey, but truthfully stabby and esteem guest you know this is how the ladies kind of treat me that really gets me like on dating apps i do really good like honestly man i may hit rate's pretty pretty fucking impressive but once they do that face time to make sure i'm real or like we go on like an actual date or something they're just like fucking cackling this shit they're just like what the fuck

i mean the voice is insane i don't i don't want to He talks like bubbles from trailer parks once. He literally sounds like that. And so we do have to admit that, right? He acknowledged that. And you know that. And we have to start there from a place of honesty. Right.

But I also think it's in Derek. Anyway, let's finish. Let's finish. Yeah, I like him. You want to date him? Dude, look, what the fuck, eh? Like, one time this one rocket, I was courting. Basically, she told me that, like, don't fucking talk when we're on the fucking

work bench, right? And I'm like, what? And she just, yeah. Anyway, sir, I just, I just, I talk. I got, I got that problem for my mom. We just kind of, you know, rambling, rambling on. But, yeah, I was dating her for like a month, month or so. I love this guy.

I do too. Yeah, basically, he just told me just to, you know, don't fucking talk or anything. And, you know, that's not the kind of girl I want. So anyways, you know, looking for a nice girl. Not just, like, hookups and stuff. So, yeah. Honestly, Stabby, I try to go like weeks without legit opening my mouth. That's probably why fucking sounds so crazy right now,

because this is like the first time I talked to anyone besides my parents and my sisters for who got, maybe like three weeks, I guess. Wow. Yeah, just fucking hurts my soul, Stabby. So if you got any advice for me, that'd be awesome. Appreciate you, man. All right. Thank you later.

It sounds like he's only dating American women. Well, he's Canadian, clearly, right? Right. And he lives in the Irish. He says big city. He's from Manitoba. What's the closest big city? So what is he is?

I don't know Canada logistics. So he's still in Canada. I would assume. Because I'm like, wouldn't he said A? He said, we don't say A down here. Wouldn't people from Canada understand and like hear his speech and be familiar with it? When he first started talking, we were all like. Oh, that makes sense.

Yeah. He does sound like, he does, yeah, like sound like somebody from Minnesota. Yeah, Winnipeg. Yeah. soda, but that kind of, like, yes, people would hear that voice,

but it would be like someone here dating somebody with like a really thick southern accent or a really thick, like, you know, just whatever.

It's just some regional, he just has an extra strength regional accent. Varsity regional accent. Yeah. But I honestly do find it endearing. I know he doesn't. He sounds so sweet.

And he sounds like a nice guy. I think the thing is Emory. Sadat out. We don't know him. Well, he says he does okay on dating apps, right? Because he's tall. I mean, he must be good-looking.

You got to get a speech pathologist or something. You got to get a speech therapist. Well, you got to get somebody to teach you how to not sound like how you're saying. I'm sorry. These are the facts. I think he needs to, well, I think probably it's exacerbated by the fact that he says he doesn't talk. Right? Like he stays.

He said this is the first time he spoke to somebody who wasn't his family in three weeks. That's a big problem, right? It's like you can't, look, dude. You can't help how he sounds, though. He can't apply how he sounds. He's going to help how he sounds. He got to get a speech therapist. Well, he probably can, you know, whatever.

He can, he can work on it, I think, on the margins. But I also think he's never going to, he sounds like how he sounds, right? Like, and I will say, if there's anything I've tried to do with this show, it's like, look at my life and look at me on paper. Do you know what I mean? Five, seven, fat as shit, bald. You know, like, missing a tooth, was missing a tooth forever. Currently having to do this because I tried to exercising too hard.

and I pulled my ass cheek muscle so I have a heating pad on my ass right now. My life rocks and I, and like on paper those are horrific stats. Yeah. Everything I said is a bad stat. You have some pretty good stats and one really

serious outlier situation. God made him and it was like, I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna do a do a little something. God said, L.O.L. I'm gonna get you all this. Like, take one thing. God said, is Jacob

A Lordy, but not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jacob Alordi dupe. Yo. I mean, fucking Australians sound stupid too, you know what I mean? Yeah, but they all sound like that. You know what you should do?

I think you should move to New Orleans and then get with them because that accent, that accent is, he should start dating Punky Johnson. I do think there's something to be said about like, because where he is, he's close to the root of it. So to them, like to us,

like Marie excluded. She's like, get a. B, be yelling a throat. I do find this, like, I would love to hang out with someone who talk like this. I would love to have a conversation. Like, this is endearing to me because it's, because it's also, it's a novelty, right? Where he is, he just has the thickest hick accent possible. That's how they all view him.

So there is a little bit of like get out of where you're from because then you become kind of a novelty. You become like, you're just an inch, a guy who talks a really weird. weird way. Okay, so I said get a speech coach and you said move. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I say just stick to it. You know how many women there are in this world? There's going to be some woman out there

that likes the look and also what's going on in the throat. The girl told him not to talk on the work bitch. But I said that girl. That's that girl. You know what? I don't like her. I don't like her either. And he's a sweet guy who doesn't want to just fuck because I bet he could just... He said it's hurting his soul. That's sad. Now I do think, dude, what I would...

And this sounds like a cliche, obviously, but it is, again, the point I'm trying to make with my life in this show is like, it is about confidence, right? Right. I think this exact guy who doesn't, somebody makes fun of him, and he, like, shrinks now,

but he's, if somebody makes fun of him, he's like, hey, fuck you, buddy, how about you suck me off? You know what I mean? Like, and they'd be like, yeah, good for you, big fucking, whatever your name is like, like, yeah,

but what I'm saying is, you right now are letting, you're very self-conscious with how you sound. And what I would tell you is, yes, there are some horrible judgmental

pieces of shit in this world, right? I'm trying to get him I'm trying to help. You don't even have to pay somebody just go on YouTube

and do some red leather yellow leather. Like, you know what I mean? I actually think I think, bow now, brown cow. I do think

something to read a doctor soo's but I do think at the very minimum you need to talk more. Yeah. You need to hear yourself talk more.

Don't hide. You need to have. Don't lower, don't dim your light, King. Absolutely. Don't dim your light, Ken. Listen, if you want to look at like, like, if you feel like, you know, you said you're like a very insular place, if you want to change how you talk a little bit, yes, there are speech therapists, whatever.

If you're interested in that, you can go fucking do that. But I think more than anything, it's like you need to just talk to people, right? And like, maybe you're actually self-conscious in a dating sense. You shouldn't be self-conscious in, we're just going to give you the advice we give like guys who have the exact opposite situation of you, which is like when somebody, when a real in-cell, like, you know, ugly, fat little guy or whatever calls in, we're like, hey, work on yourself, make some friends, be social in general, because you can't just go from talking to no one and having no social life to then dating.

Yeah. This guy needs the inverse, I think, where you need to just be comfortable with yourself as a person. Right now, you are embarrassed about who you are. You don't want to talk. there are people you can just talk to you need to put in hours verbally with friends you need to be talking a lot I would even tell you fucking you're the one person on earth I would say start a podcast

or start streaming or do some shit I'm not even joking I'm going on the pods stop I would love for him to call in I would love to talk to him but I mean that in terms of like first of all I do think people like I do think people would actually

like the way you talk there are people out there There are a lot of people out there. Because you're so specific, again, that's another one of my points is like, there are so many more people in the world that want to fuck you than you're able to ever be able to fuck.

That's what I tell insales in general too, right? It's not that many. There's more, you'll never see them all. You'll never meet them all, right? There's at least one or two. In the basement. There's at least one or there exists. But for you, there are people who like, you know,

would find it. I like, I would find it. would love to have a guy in the crew who talks like that i'm not even kidding like i would love to be in the bars and one of my boys like manitoba mitch and he's saying he fucking talks like he's got like i have canadian friends and i do like their little eccentricities whatever i love me some danio simpson absolutely that's a great i put david simmons in my movie i love him every time i see him i'm just like i can't wait to talk to you he sounds fucking stupid i agree but it's endearing and so i would i would want you, I want to give you a little, because all you're around is people who judge you for how you talk.

It doesn't, they don't see it as interesting at all. I'm telling you, there are people who would actually love the way you talk. And listen, I'm not saying if you want to work on yourself, if you want to change it a little bit, that's fine too. But I'm just saying you need to stop, you need to stop like sort of your, you're not allowing yourself to make any progress because you're so self-conscious. you assume people are not going to like you or you assume they're not going to take you seriously and some people might fuck them there's other people out there

find your people and you got to put a lot of hours talking in because I bet you you will just normalize a little because if all you're talking to are the people that talk like you because they're from your insular village you need to go talk to other people I mean everyone this is a common thing when people move from places they lose some of their accent Yeah.

Like, well, I don't talk how I talked in Baltimore 100%. Like my friends from Boston who moved to fucking L.A., they lose some of it. Like, if you're in a regional place and then when I go home, it starts sounding a little more like that. You are just doubling down on this. So look, I'm not saying you have to move, but you do have to talk. You already moved to a different city. Right. So go talk.

There's other people out there and you have to make social connections with them. You have to talk a lot. You have to actually use your greatest, what you feel like is. your weakness, flip that to you know, and I do even think there's a world where it could be your biggest strength, for real. I think the way, I legit, this is not me even pulling your leg. I think

the way you talk is endearing. I find it fucking funny and cute. For real. I can imagine meeting this guy and it's like, the voice is like so disarming and yeah, you would be like, what the fuck is going on? But then when they're just talking and, you know, he's just talking about the same shit you're looking

at on Instagram or he's just like, you know, having a conversation showing his with it, I don't know. I just be like, wow, this guy's awesome. And he's self-aware, right? Yeah. The problem is your self-awareness is you need to dial it back. It's nice because I think I do like how you say.

Because like, when he started talking, he's like, yeah, listen, I know how I sound. That's all you need to say. You say that once. And then everyone goes with it. Again, Marie's a piece of shit and doesn't agree. It's all dudes in here. You're not trying to get anybody in here. It's a bunch of, yeah, I want somebody to, with an accident.

said in the crew, he's not in the crew. You need to move. No. I feel like I agree. I think you need to talk more because this is this, it's kind of the same thing. Like, you know when you're home alone and you realize it's like 5 p.m. and you haven't talked for the whole day? Because at the beginning of his message, I couldn't really understand what he was saying, but at the end it was more clear. You're right. By the end, even in this message. Yeah. I was like, sure you scroll from me because I can see. You should,

you should absolutely be talking more. And maybe it's like, You do some front-facing videos just for yourself and talk. Totally. Talk, talk, talk, talk. Get the words out specifically before a date. Because the first time you speak should not be at the date. That's a good point. You should be talking all day before the day.

That's a great point. If they hang up the FaceTime, it won't work. No, gnar. Maybe you should go and kill Tony. They need somebody like to go and kill Tony. Kill Tony will make you a storm. You end up on SNL, baby. Yeah.

And brother, if none of that works, I got a woman for you. her name is in Keshe Dialo Nah, she don't name wet dudes Just tell her you black You identify as black Transracial Man, some good ones here Let's do one or two more

Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah Transracial Hello, I've been dating a guy For maybe like six months now And we've been taking things like really slow Which is fine with me But I finally sent him nudes

And he replied This is Sofa K-K-H-A-K-I-N-G H-A-W-T And it made me sick to my stomach And then I started noticing She got the egg Like he doesn't

Spell the word fuck at all Like he uses F-U-G-T He's not religious or anything. I know that he used to do young life, but now he's an atheist. And he's 45 years old. I think that's weird. 45-year-old atheist who types like a gay man. I think that's weird.

I'm not overreacting, but it definitely gives me the egg. All right, thank you. Wow. I mean, this is insane. Listen, girl, we're going to have to do something about this text. Check them back like, who this text? Yeah. This is soaking hot

Sofa king So like Sofa S-O-F-A-K-I-N That's how people H-A-W-T Hot-Shofa But it's crazy He's an A-A-S who doesn't curse

Apparently Oh that's crazy Who doesn't type curse words So yeah I mean look The cursing He's corny He's corny He's corny

He's corny He's corny as fuck And I will say This is Look maybe we're being too prudish here but six months and you just sent him nudes? You guys haven't fucked in six months?

This sounds like this a dude that didn't eat no pussy. He's 45 people, babe. Exactly. Like, you can't be, I mean, I guess you're right. He is, even though he's not religious, he is a set,

he feels like a religious guy dating. He feels Christian. He feels, yeah, like it's like a Mormon. She said they've been taking it slow, but maybe they have fucked already in six months. She just said she sent him nude. She said she finally sent him news

Yeah I know but you could fuck For someone before sending them some news That's fair that's fair But what's the point they send the news If you already didn't see an agent to tell you Oh come on there's a point too Well after you have sex with somebody

You can still send them some news Yeah I guess spicy To get the juice is flowing I remember No he says He says so fucking hot So fucking hot I mean that's brutal

That's crazy Ew I get So fucking You're not horny when someone uses like 2002 internet like AOL

AOL It's millennial chungus Aim shit dude That's his away message Yeah This is a good lesson For the last caller Yes

Like you can have that stupid voice But don't be fucking corny And you can still get bussy Yeah absolutely She had to go holler at him She might She might need to Yeah he's texting

That's what I'm saying If there's women Who are fucking guys who say That's so fucking hot to a picture of tits, the other guy can get pussy. I mean, I guess he already is. They just doesn't, he just feels like, they're not

treating him serious. They're using him as a sex object. She said, don't speak. Do you think it's possible to be in a relationship with somebody and block their number? Why are you in a relationship? Block their number so they can't text you? Yeah, I think so. That's really romantic. Is there a feature on the iPhone for that? I only want to get phone calls from this person.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't text me. Don't text me. Don't ever text me. Just call me. It's the 90s as far as you're concerned. Tell him you got to stop texting me because I will have to break up with you at some point. Well, I mean, he's a man of a particular age.

They text weird anyway. That's true. They do text. They're not texting how we text. That is true. But, I mean, look, whatever. You got to be, you could, can you make fun of him for this? Yes.

Yeah. If you can make fun of him and he's got, and he's good-natured about it, that's kind of, then it's like, oh, okay. How long have they been dating? six months. I mean, that ain't long enough to be worried about whether it's not, you know, if this is going to be something that's going to be a longstanding problem for you,

you're not overreacting. You should get out of it or address it and just say, I mean, but I would imagine someone like him in my mind how I'm thinking of him. If you were to say, hey, you know you can just curse text and text. Yeah, stop being a- And if he's like, I don't want to, I don't want to curse and text. And he was like, well, then just don't curse at all. Yeah, don't do that.

Just be like this, this. Why can you say that's so hot? Yeah. That's so much less horny. Or even just a fucking emoji, do a horny emoji. Fire emoji. Hit it with a thumbs up, bro. The thumbs up.

Flame, flame, flame, flame. Thumbs up to some lujes is awesome like. A little ha-ha-ha flavor. Like, hello. Hit her with this, like, oh. They're in front of it. Can you imagine setting someone dudes? And they're like, a guy.

And he's like, oh. Send that. Send that. Send me back. Send the DiCaprio with the glass. Oh, no. Gifts back. Now we're talking millennial, millennial quirk bullshit.

Send a nini leaks meme. I know. He responds, I know that's right. That's actually pretty funny. I might use that. Responding gaily to nudes. That's sofa king hot. There's a SpongeBob meme for everything, girl.

Find one. Yeah. I don't know. Look, I got to be honest, that is so fucking corny. That is so fucking funny. That you are fine to not keep dating someone like this. Yeah. Or just be like, hey, man, don't do that shit.

Sis, it could be worse. You could have co-signed a car. True. It's all about perspective. You have changed your perspective. You're so right. Listen to this episode, sis, and listen to the stories before you and realize what you got going on. It might not be that bad.

It might not be that bad. And a guy that doesn't curse probably won't hit you. That's true. Damn. That is a silver lining. Yeah, you save sis. You want a safe place. I'm so freaking mad at you right now.

Friggin. I'm going to take a freaking walk. You really ticked me off. All right. These have been some good calls. What's up, Elvis? What's up? Honored guest or guest.

I love the way they've been addressing us. I'm calling here just to get your thoughts on whether I should try to get a job in the same town as my ex. So, well, not the same town, same area. So for context, you know, I worked a seasonal job this past summer in a kind of remote area of the country. I fell pretty hard for a co-worker of mine. We tried to make it work long distance.

You know, she eventually made the call that it wasn't working, but it ended, I think, reasonably, amicably with, you know, a lot of feeling on both sides. You know, we're kind of taking a break. We would want to be friends. You know, we've even talked about it like, oh, it would be cool. you know, we connect in the future at some point. Oh, this guy's toast. But I can't go back to that same place because she's going to be a supervisor next year.

And also, you know, I wouldn't want to work in the same place as her, but things kind of up in the air. But I'm wondering, they're not up in here. You're not bad for a job, you know, a couple towns over in the same area, you know, maybe just to see what develops. You're not going into it with the thought of like, we are going to get back together. You are. Stop lying, does.

Tell me, guys, really appreciate it. Take care. Thanks. Don't... Not going into it thinking that we might get back together. You're fully thinking about that. Here's where he's really in trouble. I mean, you know there was feelings on both sides.

It's like, you don't know that. You don't know that. What you know is that she broke up with you. There is no other fact here. Everything else is editorializing. The actual... Right now you're being Barry Weiss. That's the kind of news you're doing.

You need actual, like, what are the facts? Right? You got to explain this to him. Who's Barry Weiss? Don't worry. about it, sugar. You said Barry White? Yeah, yeah.

She's a singer, he's a singer. Really deep voice. You'll never find. Don't go to that lady's house. A job like mine. Don't go to her job. Don't go to her house. Don't go to her hotel.

Leave that lady alone. Leave that lady alone. We should put merch. Leave that lady alone. That's what I don't tote bags. All that we know here is that you had a fling. You worked at a fucking White River Raffirm.

thing summer camp. Yeah, he just had a remote off the highway. And you had a run of parks off the highway. And you had a flame with your coworkers. One at a time. One at a time.

Yeah. You did some bullshit like that. Where the water got pee in it. Absolutely. The water's disgusting. And so, and like, and you got some pussy for the summer and now you're being greedy.

And now you're not a greedy, emotional, right? You clearly like this woman. She sounds older too. Who knows? All we know is that she is not as interested as he is. And now he's like, you're doing so many of the like, this is so clearly on your mind. Because if you didn't give a fuck, if you're like, hey, that's a girl I dated a little bit. Now we're friends.

The job was paying good. I'm cool. Like, we're still friends. Who gives a fuck? I'm not going to be weird about it. I just need that job. That's how someone who actually doesn't give a fuck about her behaves. Not like, well, I've done the math.

And if I'm exactly two towns over, then that's not too close. but it's close enough that who knows something might develop. It's like, no, dude, you're fucked, you clearly care about this girl too much. Whatever decision you make, understand it's never happening. You're not getting back together with her. And if you do, it's going to be really sad. Because if you do, she will misread it as like, oh, he just wants to keep hooking up. Not now we're going to get together.

He's about to relocate for this lady. I mean, again, it's a summer job. It's fucking crazy. But yes. He's in the same area, not the same area, a couple towns over it. He's going to be in the... car for 42 minutes trying to get to this lady's cream. Droving from the little mini amusement park.

Yeah. To the big park. To the big park. She's like, we're having, oh, yeah. She's like, oh, he's at six flags. We're doing a co-worker happy hour at Chili's. You can come, I guess. And to him, that's like, we're back in business.

He's spraying cologne on his dick. He comes in in a fucking tuxedo. He got a blaze, a sport coat on. She got on sweatpants, no makeup. One male's missing. This is 50-50. Yeah. Absolutely.

Absolutely. She'd be fine. I'm just hanging with the bro. She'd be fine splitting the check. She really... You're the bro, dude. You're the bro. You're literally the bro. You're putting too much on this.

It's over, my friend. So, what, listen, again, whatever decision you make, go into it knowing it's over. Is there a more convenient job that you can get in the summer that has nothing to do with this girl? If so, do that. This is, don't, don't, you're so... And again, the only reason I'm so harsh with you is because this is me in my 20s. I did this over and over and over again with girls that I, like, sort of dated, that we had flings and I, like, read too much into it.

That's the only reason you're getting such harsh words out of me, because I know being this pathetic and trying to talk yourself into getting pussy from a girl who's done with you. I know this feeling. I know exactly what you were in the grips of right now. So move along, brother. It ain't going to work. And sis, they always come back. Yeah.

Every time. I'm so glad Cher's fucking ignored you. I'm so glad Share big dog to you. Cher's going to come back too. You're going to be going to extend out at the same time next year. She's going to be like,

you looked good. Mabry. You got me behind you. You got something fun for us to go out on here, Little Eldish? Yeah, let's go out with a question that is on the mind of everyone in this room here. Okay, great.

Hi, Davy. I guess I'm not really looking for advice, but I'm a big fan of this show, and my girlfriend likes listening to your stuff when she's hanging out, sometimes sexual advice. And she just had a question that I wanted to ask on her behalf. She asked if you get really sweaty when you have sex,

and it's kind of like a sweaty sex situation, because we definitely do sometimes. and she was wondering if you do as well if you can answer this I know she'd be thrilled so thank you and have a good one shout out to sis in the bag

she was like yeah I said it at first I was like she didn't ask this he did the ass made me know it was her just got phone call cut out to this fat couple that's wondering if I also

get fucking sweaty during sex she says I really want to know I just want to know If stopy fucks and Sweety, sex is happening I guess I guess depending on the temperature in the room The answer is yes

Listen, if it's not cold How you like the room when you fucking is the question That's a great point I can't Yeah, yeah I get it I get into I rent a freezer

I rent a meat locker And I fuck in those No I think if Certainly If it's fucking like 78 and above. That's crazy. It's getting real sweaty.

There's some real nose drips coming off. You know what I mean? There's a real nose drips hitting you. Hitting you in the eye. A nose drip getting in your eye. You got to blink really hard. A guy's sweating my eye once, and I said I will never come back here.

I said, oh. Now you've changed my physical state of matter. I said, right. My eyeball did not consent to this. Woo, I've never blocked somebody so fast. I threw my phone at the car. I was in the Uber life. Not the Uber.

You did it? I said, yuck. You ain't even get a message from the, you got a message from the driver that was like, I understand. I said, Kobe. So, yeah. Look, of course, of course I'm a man of size. if I'm really working up a sweat, sure, it'll happen.

No, you know, no. But in the wintertime, not really, no. If it's nice and cool. But I do, I need it cool for that reason. Otherwise, it's getting fucking, it's just, I'm just getting sweaty as hell. Hey, sex is hot. A lot of us sweat during sex.

Body heat. You should be sweat. You're not really sweating. If you don't minimum, you ain't fucking. If you don't have a sheen over you. You know what I mean? If you don't have a nice glaze. Yeah, well, you know.

I don't know. There should be a smell in the room. Well, you're doing something different than us. We're not there. Don't talk about me as time. I'll just know what I'm talking about. Yeah, there's a smell there with me. I'm not alone over here.

Alex, you nasty. The next time someone sends a message, it's going to be about truth. All right. That's beautiful. I'm glad we could solve that. solve everyone's problems. Marie Alex, thank you so much for coming on.

What do you guys want to plug? Thank you for waiting 30 minutes for me to give here. Of course, of course. Well worth the way. The sun has sand. Oh, believe me, the next thing I had scheduled was at 6 o'clock. Just to be safe.

He knew what was up. He knew it was up. He knew what it was up. I got here, a cute seven minutes late. Yeah. How would you do that, Alex? Alex, Alex, I did her podcast, and she was late to me.

I was also late. Yeah, I was four minutes late. No, you was 10 minutes late. No. And I was 15. No. I thought for once, you know what? There's color people's time and there's Marie time.

I thought for once I was like, maybe a little taste of Marie zone medicine. Yeah. You got to do her like that. Yeah, but no. I'll be owed at her. I'll be like, I will leave you if you don't get here. Do you understand how crazy?

You never left yet, though. You understand how crazy it is where when Sydney is the most on-time person in a podcast? That's insane. fucking crazy anyway I feel like there's a running thread of Marie's reputation of BLA on these podcasts

now everybody brings it I am the Lauren Hill of podcast It could all None of the fucking Yeah I love how you're late You have fucking eight fucking clocks around your neck

You couldn't look at one of them I can't see my neck Just like you stiles We both can't see our necks All right, well, you've lost your plug privileges. They know where to find me. One of your fans ran up on me at the cellar recently. Hey, I love you on Stavi's world.

I was like, don't touch me. I'm at work. Security. You're credit, babe. Yeah, I love it. I love it. Well, thanks, guys. Alex, where can they find?

I mean, people know. Go on my Instagram. Go to put stuff on here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll link all your stuff. With the links. Come see us. We're on tour right now.

Me and Ellis at the Dreamboat tour is going on as you're listening to this episode. And we will talk to you guys next week. Bye-bye. Happy Black History, man. That's right.