Stavvy's World - #44 - Geoffrey Asmus

Episode Date: October 2, 2023

Geoffrey Asmus joins the pod to talk about his special "The Only Funny White Man," his unique style of self love, holding onto his v-card until 25, being incel-adjacent in his youth, and much more. Geoffrey and Stav help callers including a guy who's concerned that his girlfriend's southern family is racist, and a woman whose former tattoo artist is an obsessed freak. Visit https://thefreezepipe.com/ and use promo code STAVVY for 10% off you entire order. Say goodbye to harsh smoke forever. See Geoffrey Asmus live! Get tix at https://www.whitecomedian.com/ Watch Geoffrey Asmus' special "The Only Funny White Man" on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3vSW95zhfs Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!

I have a big family and they're spread around multiple countries. So a few years ago it was my brother's wedding and most of them decided to come. Great news, but a big problem. Where do you put eight people all with different requirements and keep them all together? We looked at some hotels but then it was obvious get an Airbnb. My mom and I were able to find the perfect place. It was a big house with multiple rooms and in a part of the city with woods

and walking trails all around. The Airbnb also included a huge kitchen where we all got together the day after the wedding for a big family meal. This is a cherished memory for my family and me. And whenever I drive by that location, it always makes me smile. Not long ago, my mom and I stopped by that area to walk around and remember one of the most special times for my family.

Whether you're traveling with friends or with family for a big wedding or justification, get an Airbnb. Everybody to Stobby's World, 904800 Stob. Colin will solve all your problems. We're very happy to have Jeffrey Osmos in the fucking building. That's up. Into heaven, man. In the freaky bit. Cover him with that curse. We're really trying.

Just a clean pause. Just a clean pause. For the first five minutes, it's a clean. A little Christian. For the first five minutes, it's cleaning. God, Jeff, for the YouTube. He gets off the rail track. And then he goes off the rail track.

And then it goes off the rail track. In a game, we talk about the traffic and all that. Oh, here we go. And then we make plans to traffic. Probably a lot of options and greets. Probably. Right now it's Turkey. A lot of migrants though.

Oh yeah, yeah. Even the people that aren't, even the people that aren't specifically being sex trafficked, it's like there was a phenomenon 20 years ago when I was going where every nurse, you could all of a sudden, every old guy could afford a nurse from Russia. Oh, really?

And they were just tens. Oh, it's like caring for old men. And it was this thing where it's like, you know, that was like their Asian massage parlour Exactly, you get in home, exactly the same thing where it's like not all of them are jacking you off. Right, I'd like that, yeah we just have the option of getting tugged off by a Chinese lady. I want different races. Why is it just a Chinese lady? Do we have a Russian thing too? It's true, I I like a little different. Well, there's the Russian baths, but those are all pretty much old Russian dudes.

Isn't that just like old orgies? Yeah, old dudes. But they're straight, but they're all hanging out naked. They're too pussy to be gay. Yeah. They're like dipping their toes in, but they're like, I don't want to be gay. Well, there's a level of homophobia where it's horseshoe theory, where it's like someone gay is hell and someone homophobia.

Yeah, it's they act the guy the same way. They're thinking about gay sex as much as a game. And they're just hanging out nude. They're like, like our boy Julio, Julio Galerati. Okay. And he went to Afghanistan and he would just, the Taliban guys hold hands and walk around. Oh, yeah We can never be gay to sing at the like you're dick's

All I won't let us be gay Exactly and that's kind of the vibe with the Russian bathhouse where it's like these guys are just naked playing cards Dicks out lounging watching like TV and it's like all right like it's gay these guys are just naked playing cards, dicks out, lounging, watching like TV. And it's like, all right. Like it's gay to be around women. Yeah, it's gay to talk to women. Only gay men are friends with women. Yeah, I'm hanging out with my boys, dicks out.

Yeah, so there was this, so you know, some light kind of trafficking going on. I was in Greece, there's like, there's packs of wild dogs everywhere. Yeah. So that was a weird thing. And Athens, they're like, don't go out after midnight. These packs of dogs might rip you to shreds.

I'm like, what? Yeah. Because they don't put down dogs. It's like a law they won't use. You can't use the nice dog in Greece, I guess. Oh, yeah, that's a very interesting, Jeff. But can I stop you right there? It just feels like you're the kind of guy

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Shop today and start fighting fire with ice, Jeffrey. I'm sorry you were saying. And they have huge roving packs of dogs that like, phone some neighborhoods. That's like, oh, the dobermans have this one. I think the dog problem has gotten better. Did they? Okay, this is like 2011 maybe or something.

Yeah, that was the height. Maybe they're getting, maybe they're allowing you to to know each other. They had to use and use them. That might be such a bizarre form of like morality. I know. We won't kill a dog, but we won't give people welfare.

That's right, right. He kind of the dogs. Well, it's funny because it's like, yeah, they wouldn't kill a dog, but it't give people welfare. He's funny, right? He kind of the dogs. Well, it's funny because it's like, yeah, they wouldn't kill dog, but it's like, you know, refugees start showing up. They're like, yeah, oh, we'll kill these dogs. Yeah. Yeah. Cut off their dicks.

Yeah. I'm tear out the unit right. Yeah. But it's funny. I had no idea that that was a law because, for my experience, Greek people do not give a fuck about animals. Like they like them, but push comes to shove.

Like my mom has a dog, she loves the dog. But the doctor was like, they found this dog, she's older shit, she was getting ran through. We're talking like this cute little dog, nipples long as hell. You know what I mean? Just getting tugged off. How many like,

litters of puppies this tiny ass. Little shit she was had, right? And so they found her in the streets of Baltimore and they love the dog, but it has a heart condition. Yeah. And my mom was like, and the doctor was just like, okay, well,

you know, it needs, it probably, it might need, we might need a test, we have to do this test for 500 bucks. And if the test comes back positive, she's gonna need a surgery that costs $8,000. And your mom's like, my mom? I'm almost like, don't do the test. Yeah, she's like, if it comes up, I'm not getting her the search.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The idea that there's a very American thing where it's like people are like cutting, like I have friends who fucking cook pork chops. Oh yeah, they order those boxes of fresh dogs for that around every week, that's insane. But it's like this dog, or they put it in diapers and they even make it smooth. That is how it's the wrong. it's like, it's like this dog, or they put it in diapers and like, they make it smooth.

That is how the book is. Yeah. Yeah. There's no food deserts for these dogs. These dogs ain't having ramen on their birthday. Yeah. These dogs get fucking a lamb chops, you know what I mean? Exactly.

And so it is a very, that to me is, because I, you know, I haven't had pets because it's like, you never had a pet you were in love with as a kid. No, we had really bad asthma. Oh, so you like that pet could kill you, kind of like that. The best part is my brother who really wanted the dog was one of the worst asthma. He grew out of it now, he has a dog is too catchy.

He stopped being a little bit. He stopped being a pussy. The doctor diagnosed him with being a pussy who was seven. It was like, you're mind-erown at you idiot. You can have a dog. And who knows? Maybe our parents were also using that as a convenient excuse. Oh, yeah. We're protecting you. Yeah, but we did do the, we, we had the fucking do a nebulizer a lot. Oh, you, oh, I never had that. You had to just, I, damn just, damn, I'm coming back to this right now where it's like, the end of Taylor and the end of your life.

You're gonna do for a half hour every once in a while. We would have a asthma tax and it would be like, Isn't that scary? You can't burn it. I just didn't know anybody. Yeah, that would freak the shit out of me. I just, yeah, I was just like, you just couldn't breathe that well.

And then we just had this thing, which is kind of cool. Cause I remember it would be like, it's like a little stem gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like a weird gun. And you were just sucking this air that like tasted like, it tasted like scientific. Oh, right.

And in my head, it was almost felt like you were like Darth Vader. Oh, yeah. Like it was cool. I remember being like, this is kind of fucking shit. It's like a steroid. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, exactly. It's like, I felt like I was like doing like, I was like getting stronger. Right, yeah, it was cool. I remember being like this is kind of it's like a steroid. I'm pretty sure I was positive I felt like I was like doing like I was like getting stronger right yeah

You're your lower seven eight pack There we go. So so we did have fucked up things But I wonder if they ever like you know they lied to us But yeah, I to this day. I'm like you don't feel that love towards animals that the right I mean America like a real into our into our fucking animal like you know. And like, I have that dog I was just talking about, boo boo. Boo boo.

Yeah, boo boo. Incredible. With a Greek accent. Not boo boo. Boo boo. Boo boo. Yeah. I love boo boo.

She's got, I love her in her fucking long ass nipples. But you know, you have her, you have her, somebody just a dog. I give it a little, I give it a little pinch. Yeah, I give it a little, I play with them like gum, you find on the underside of your desk, you know, I'm at your school. You know, I give them a little,

and then you're like, oh, you're like, what am I doing? You abs and mindedly find yourself playing with it and you're like, oh, disgusting. I treat that's how I treat her nipples. But, but like, you know, I don't have that. And like, I think it's, I don't know. I do, do you grow up with pets?

Yeah, I had a dog, I was deeply in love with a Minnesota. Minnesota, yeah, that's an animal. Yeah, yeah, my mom grew up on a farm, yeah. So they got, she has that love of animals. But she also had to like shoot them. Exactly. But she like loves them, but she's like, I put them down too. Right, right. I put the shotgun in the smile.

Yeah. It wasn't even sick. And just was like, we got bored. Yeah. Yeah. That's, I respect that level of animal love. Because you can love them, but it's like, they love them, but they know that life is transient. They're like, we got, like, it's got to go. We can't have another, yeah, they had like 30 dogs at a time.

Like, and like 10 cats, because they like kill the rats and protect the chickens or whatever. Yeah, yeah, you've got a job. No, it was perfect. It was perfect. When the rats, when the cats stop catching rats, they're done. They're out of the family.

You gotta go to fucking quota. You gotta earn brother. You gotta put a five rest to the porch. Yeah, it has like an offering. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it has like an offering. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, farm life is wild. They would have like chicken slaughters. Our uncles would advise to the chicken slaughter every year

and they just like, I only went once when I was a kid. It was like they're gathering. We're gonna have a potluck and they're like, fucking chop chickens heads up with axes and shit. That chicken was probably good as fuck though. It was as good as you thought it would be. Really? Whirl Minnesota food's disgusting actually.

Even the fucking fresh ass chicken? I think my relatives didn't know how to cook on this. I really think they were kind of, the food we ate as a child and my relatives that is terrible. Really? Like yellow salad and like, you ever had that shit like,

like a meatloaf and like hot dish and stuff is disgusting. It's like Norwegian, it's their gross. The worst white food wise. Food wise, yeah. Lutifisc, you know what Lutifisc is? It's like pickled herring, it's disgusting, it's like gelatinous, it's really gross. I don't know why, everything's gelatinous or what.

Yeah, they love head cheese too, it's like gelatinous. It's really like gross. I don't know why everything's gelatinous or like they look head cheese too. It's like brains and cheese. You went there didn't you? To Norway, yeah. What was the food? It was all bullshit, right? There's some good stuff. I had like something that was kind of like a reindeer pot pot.

Yeah, the reindeer and elk was good when I went to Norway, but the rest was true. You was in Norway too? Yeah, it's so expensive too. It's expensive. It was brutal. I had some like cured whale one time, which was just like, it's expensive. It's like cured whale one time Which was just like there's like this strips of like it almost like whale jerk here something

But like a little softer than jerk here whatever, but it's like all black and shit They're also in danger, but I was like I want to share Like the owner of Jimmy John's going on safari I'll just killing extinct animals for his own fucking perverse pleasures and Norway's like the owner of Jimmy John's going on safari. I'll just kill him extinct animals for his own fucking perverse pleasures. And Norway's like the final ethno state. It's like, it's so wide, it's like, is this okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Is this allowed anymore? It's like, was Hitler norwegian? That's a little like. Yeah, why didn't he just move to Norway? Yeah, I think. He could have spoken out of them. Like, yeah, we love your ideas. Yeah, yeah. I know, it is so funny to you see that and you see

like Japan. It's all. But Japan is so homogenous. And they're racist and like but smiling to you. Were they're just like, no, you can't come in. That happened. We don't have black people here. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we're trying to the camera. Like, yeah. We were trying to go to some park, and they were like, they did some lady which was doing this. For you, they were doing that, really? Well, even whites. Really?

Yeah, they were like, and smiling. They were doing the hand-ex thing. And being like, no. And I had a friend who lived there, and she was telling me how it's like, they'll just tell you like, oh yeah, the rent, she'll respond to like an apartment. She was looking for an apartment. Let's say it costs three grand a month or whatever. They're like oh, yeah the rent she was she'll respond to like in a part she's looking for

On par let's say cost three grand Yeah, they're back. Oh, yeah, I mean we listed this three grand a month But you are not Japanese so it's 3500 They can leave and they just say that Just discriminate and everyone's just like I mean these are the rules. Yeah, you know, which is like It's I guess so I guess if if white supremacist made fucking PlayStation, you could have had it. You know what I mean?

You just haven't made anything good. I gave why the Japanese don't like white people. I could wrap my hair all the way. They might be like that. 100% so that we're all just masturbating over Oppenheimer. They're just like, you didn't get a good or park, so okay. And also think about the white guys that love Japan. masturbating over Oppenheimer. You don't get to go to our parks, okay? And also think about the white guys that love Japan.

What a brutal guy that is. They're just going, just the fucking reddit bros, just a fat guy who looks like me. I know you're all thinking it. A guy with, he take my soul out, put a loser into this body. Yes, you were talking that path. 100% but you chose not to. I chose not to. By God's grace, he made me you know,

good at comedy and not you know, not an anime fan. Thank God. Thank God. Anime sucks. I know that's gonna be people, man, but it's sucks. I mean, Dragon Ball Z will always have a place in my heart, but I guess people love anime think that sucks too. Oh, really? Is that hack anime? It is. I never got that even as a kid.

I didn't really understand what was going on. Yeah. I might be an idiot, but I don't know. It was not. You definitely weren't an idiot for it. But for whatever reason, Dragon Ball Z was huge in Baltimore, and you didn't even want, did you watch it, Elders? I watched it a little.

I never got too deep into it. It's like a little hard to follow, but I would get sucked in randomly watching like, you know, cartoon network at 10 p.m. You're like, whoa, it's kind of sick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But anyway, think about the who's going. So you're talking about anime fans. Yeah.

Just fucking neckbeers going to, you know, find the waifu in Japan. They're going to fuck prostitutes. And buy child pornography. Sure. And they have in the stores, they have a fucking manga. That's like, the girl looks like a little kid, but it's actually an 8,000 year old witch or something you know what it means or it's like they have and they have like

statue ads that was like oh I remember I went I went to Japan with some friends and one of their girlfriends bought essentially like these weird child like slave statues and like a manga of like that yeah it was fucked up. We were right to drop the bombs. We were right. We were trying to shut out the Oppy. Shut out the Oppy. Shut out the Oppy.

So you think the weird, the Asian Fesh comes from like, because our grandpa's went to Japan. And that's probably the best sexier life during war. You finally get to Japan, the war, the Japanese women are like, thank you for saving us from the emperor. They're just sucking your dick like freedom. I don't think the Japanese were sucking off the way the French were from Shave. No, they were better. They were more so-and-do-yes.

Yes, yes. I think they were doing a little, I don't know how consensual some of that Japanese sucks was. Yeah, a lot of that Japanese sucks was right Yeah, we're just gonna go Further Japanese Our grandpa yeah, I do wonder what that but it is funny because you I went to Japan on like, the first time I went, I was on a, like a really boot like USO tour. It was like, oh really?

The lowest level of those things. It was like, funny bone, literally. Like booked it, and I got paid. The Tokyo funny bone, yeah. Dude, I'm not kidding, I got paid $750. To go to Japan. And there, thing was like, we're covering a trip to Japan and you're broke.

And at the time, I was like, you know, I was like, I may never be able to get to Japan. You know what I'm like, I'm 24, I think I was living in Baltimore's right before I moved to New York. Holy shit. And I was like, how'd they find you? It was, the headliner that was doing it was a guy who was in DC. I don't know if you know Bent Washburn. I've heard, I've met him once, yeah.

Great dude. Funny as heard I met him once. Yeah great dude. Yeah funny Is shit love that guy and? Truly a great comic and the kind of guy who was like he was doing a new hour every year Oh, like when it wasn't when it wasn't cool Yeah, because he was just like he would get to play cool good clubs at liked comedy But he was like I don't have a fan base and it's got to be the same people coming sure Has to do something different every year. Great joke, right?

I respect that a lot. He's the man, he's great. There was no reason to write a new hour back then. No, no, no, no, no, he's good at comedy. Yeah, he's good at comedy. A lot of great jokes. And so he just, he was around DC at the time. I was doing a lot of stuff in DC

and I think the feature that was supposed to go got a DUI or something. And because it's like through the army, it's the one time, you can't be a criminal in a comedian. Yeah, I mean. And so, usually we're rewarded for that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Usually you get a nice 15 minute chunk, forget a DUI, but not in this case. And so I just got lucky and he, he, do they censor you a lot when you perform for the troops? So they like you can't talk about bush, don't mention that canister. No, really. I mean, I think there was a couple things. I think weirdly, they didn't want to talk about religion. Oh, okay. But I don't remember. This was, you know, this was right. Fuckin' 12 years ago. I bet the troops are great audiences though. They were good order like down to laugh cuz they're dark and fucked up. Yeah sure no no they were good shows whenever

There's a service been in the crowd. They laughed their ad like they're trying to drown out the demons Guy with no leg you could roast him for not having a leg. Yeah, and he would be like I am I was stupid You know, I'm gonna shoot myself in five years Say whatever you want. There was one, the only time I've had a bad service member, was you remember this one, you remember where this was? They were just talking all the time. And they were just like talking to me,

I was like, hey, could you quiet down? And I didn't know that the guy was, you know, whatever. And like at the end of the show, he just wouldn't shut the fuck up. And it's like, I tell like the last hour I didn't have like a, you know, not a long story, but it was like this thing where it's like you kind of the last four minutes You got to get a little momentum going right and so I just was like all right get the you know I was like this guy's got a fun go and like as he's living here's like I'm a purple heart veteran It's like this that mean you can't shut. You get 20% off of Denny's.

You don't get a fucking act out there. That's not the only thing. And then like five other veterans were like, fuck that guy. Yeah, I'm just working out. I mean, also, we don't believe that even. He's saying you're a purple heart out of no work. I mean, maybe.

Stolen Valor. Yeah, he's going to be stealing his color around. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. He definitely, he was like, and I think he claimed that it was like, one of his friends was like, he's got a condition because of the war. Oh, okay.

Buddy, sitting the back. Yes, I was in the front. Yeah, he was in the back of the front. He was like in the corner where it's like, you couldn't see him, but he was just just close, but you couldn't see him, so it was like, one of the worst places to talk to him, but you can't hear him.

I fucking think a couple times and told him to shut up and, you know, it worked until the very end, they just started chatting again. But yes, for the most part, they are great. Nice. Dude, this is kind of not that reliable. Do you know as people are heckling more recently? I think that's happening a lot more now.

I think because of all the clips, you should. Yeah, we've created a monster. We can't do it, but it is. It's tough. I mean, I actually don't mind it because I love shutting down people who think things are gonna go a certain way. Yeah, it's actually kind of a Worn a win most of the time because they're idiots. It's a nice thing where it's like it's kind of like the prison thing where it's like You got to fuck somebody up to make an example of them Oh sure and then the crowd you're a god you're a guy. You shut that guy. So it's and by the to fuck somebody up to make an example of them. Oh sure, and then the crowd, you're a god. You're a god.

Let's do shut that guy to the end. And by the way, the people that have been like planning their heckle all day. Oh, are the easiest dumbest people all the time. They make trouble immediately. They're coming to the e-s. If someone how they met, you're like, you know, a whorehouse in Bangkok.

And you're like, when? They're like, oh, I'm kidding. We've been married for 12 years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They just make trouble immediately. They've been playing that all day. And their best go-to's are always just They're like when they're like oh, I'm kidding leave it married for 12 years That all day and their best go-to's are always just calling you gay or something. Yeah, yeah, it's that great man That's fucking awesome. Yeah, what did you do today? I sucked your mom's That's really funny. Yeah, that's definitely going around but whatever we do company's fucking stupid And it's a bullshit art form anyway fucking cares

Little two series All bullshit It's all bullshit. I just it should be fun in a good time and it's all fucking and I'm only here because I was 19 and Didn't want to work hard at anything and I did open mics and then you wake up and it's your 34 and it's like, I cannot do that. You started 19 in Baltimore? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, man.

I wish I would've had that vision. No, it's fucking stupid. I mean, you just don't have any life experience. Like, right? You didn't gonna college then. I was in college but I was on, you know, I just, you're kind of fucking around. I didn't give a fuck.

Yeah, I did. After I tried, I knew I wanted to do comedy, and I did it for a year in college, and then like all my immigrant guilt came back. Oh, I was like, I gotta be a doctor, one of them. I took a year, yeah, I took a lawyer for me, but that same idea. Okay, god.

And I took like a year and a half off where I was like so, I really studied hard and I was so, I got grades, I was so depressed. My life was fucking horrible. Cause you had glimpsed to the truth for a year, like this is what I should do and then you went back to the real world. And then I went to therapy

and I think a therapist who, I got free therapy because they were like students at the school. And I think this girl just like broke the ethical code where she was like, you should drop out of school. Right. They're not supposed to like you to do it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. She was, whatever reason, she was right. I don't remember her name, but shut out to her. That's so white. It's like when they have like the hairdressers at school cut your hair, but they're doing it with your psyche. Yes.

Yeah. Yeah. This woman's like, I think your dad fucked you. You're like, I think your dad fucked you. You're like, I don't think you're right at all. I think it's your first week on the job. It really was that, 100%. But yeah, it was like, you know, you don't have any fucking,

and I just didn't have anything to say for show. Oh my God. If I were to done counting, I was 19. There would be some videos that would ruin my life. I would have said some things about fat chicks that would not have been pleasant. Yeah, I would have said some things about fat chicks That would not have been pleasant Huge in cellar Jason oh really? I was like a nice guys just don't get

Friend zone nice to all these bitches. They won't suck me off What the hell well okay, so it's so embarrassing is this true that you were a version for a wildly long time? I was a virgin because 25 or 26, yeah. Yes, because I, because before, I think, this is when I first moved to New York, I think we might have been on the same show. I think we did a couple shows in like 2018, 2018, maybe. Maybe even earlier than that, yeah.

I think a little earlier than that. I visited a lot before that. I actually do remember, okay, then you are the guy. I was thinking, oh wow, where was it? Do you remember? Was it Whiplash maybe? It was not Whiplash. It was like a shit. It was kind of shitty. Yeah. Yeah. And it was like somewhere in Park Slow. Oh sure. Oh, I used to run a show in Park Slow. It was probably the show. I was in your show. Airplane mode. Is that like cherry tree bar? I actually don't think it was that. No, okay. No. It was probably the shot, right? Was it your show? Airplane mode. Is that like cherry tree bar by the Barclays Center? I actually don't think it was that.

No, okay, no. It was it, no, it wasn't, because I did that one a different time. Yeah, you did that, yeah. This is like way before, this before. I think I might have caught you on some visit for sure. Oh, gotcha. Because I remember you being like funny,

you were funny as shit and then I was like, but I was like, how does this guy not get pussy? Because I actually know what? You might have still been a that's a thing. I might have been a big guy. That's what it was. That's what it was dude. That's what it was.

It blew my fucking mind. Is you know long bit about it? Yeah, it's what it was. And it blew my mind cause it's like look me and eldest, we were getting too much pussy too early. He stumbled into a little bit. But at a certain point it's like you're 20 and it's like all right. You know what I mean, you're 21,

it's like you get to 20 and you're like, I'm not randomly gonna get pussy, I need a girlfriend. I got to 21. I got to 21 and I was like, maybe I'll go for the record. Yeah, that was like, that was like, ah fuck you girl.

I don't know, I don't know. Yeah, they said no for you. But I do remember that because it was like this weird thing where I was almost looking at a alternate, like half my life could have gone. Oh, I'm glad that you thought I should have got plusy. I'm glad to hear that.

Absolutely, because I was like, because you weren't, because when you get the 25, you know what I mean? Someone's thrown it at you. You're, yeah, you're like, you're, and you were fun, that's the other thing.

You were funny in a way where you knew what you were doing. So you had, you definitely had like, you could have a conversation with someone. You weren't like, you weren't like, somebody was like accidentally, you were legitimately good at stand up. And it was like, you, it was, it just blew my mind that you could be like self-reflective and then still not get pussy.

It was like, you were fun, you were funny, you were like clearly aware of things. I was like, how does he not fuck drunk? That's what it was. I got so drunk I would like just like ruin it with every one. We the guy was blacking out at 8.30 p.m. in college. Like I was the guy who was like, oh Jeff Pugh before we even left for the bar. So like that was me.

Like I got so drunk I couldn't get laid. It was insane. Honestly, I had this weird Catholic guilt a little bit too. Yeah, because you you broke Catholic. like I got so drunk I couldn't get laid. It was insane, honestly. I had this weird Catholic guilt a little bit too. Yeah, because you broke Catholic. Yeah, and I built up sex in my mind to be like sex is the most important thing in life. You gotta find the right girl.

Oh wow. Then you have sex and you're like, it's fine. It's just a thing we do. It's like beating off plus. Yeah. It's like beating off without commercials. Yeah, that's right. It's like the off plus. Yeah, it's a beating off without commercials. Yeah, it's like the Patreon of beating off. Yeah, that's a success.

It's like, oh, I unlocked a new tier. Yeah, yeah. It's a content. It's nothing special. It's better than beating off, but it's worth it. It's worth it. No, probably not. Yeah, I built it up so much in my mind. It was embarrassing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, been doing this pro bono for the last two years. So subscribe if you want Elders to be able to afford,

you know, nice life. Yeah, no, that's so, that's just so crazy to me to be, you were good enough a comedy to have this long bit about. Oh, and women would come up to me, I mean, I wasn't attracted, but like, if you're funny, people will come up to you. And I would fumble the bag every single time. It was like a running joke in Madison,

where I started in Wisconsin like, oh, there's Jeff ruining it again. With that fucking girl, like, oh, throwing herself at me. And I'm just like, he ever read about Napoleon? And she's like, what the, I'm trying to fuck you, dude. And I just had no idea. I could never read the signs that someone was trying to have sex with me.

That was the problem really. Well, that's as if, because my problem was like, I kind of knew. And I was even pretty good at like getting to like, you know, because I was going to talk and whatever, you know, the same thing, like, you know, funny. But I knew, and once I knew that I could fuck, it wasn't that I missed it. It's that once I knew, I got so nervous. Oh, yeah I missed it. It said, once I knew I got so nervous. But that's when I would blow it. I was too aware.

Once I knew you in an opportunity was in existence, you were just like, and the only times I ever even got close was when I was drunk as shit. And then one time I was so drunk that even as a youth on my dick, I was just getting my soft, like a little ass dick. Like a little ass dick is like. Mashaush. Yeah. I'm so pathetic.

He is pretty early for this to be happening. He is. Yeah. And then I just immediately went and like projectile vomit. I was barely like, cause you're so nervous to oh my god. I was just so, that one I actually wasn't nervous.

I was like, that was actually the coolest thing that's ever happened to me. Cause I was like, finally it's happening. This girl, ma'am, I've heard some rumors she has her. She's all probably be fine. I'm just strong. I don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck at all.

Like it's like it does it, whatever. I'm so drunk. I'm like, but I'm like, it's finally, you know, I'm touched, I'm sucking on titties. Oh, there we go. Things are going nice. And then I just, but I'm like, it's finally, you know, I'm touched. I'm sucking on titties, you know. Oh, there we go. Things are going nice. And then I just, you just feel that, I'm starting to sweat. I'm like, like, boiling up for you.

It's that like weird boiling where I was like, and I kind of have to fart also. So you're like, trying to hold the fart. You're like, you might, my mouth starts doing that weird. You're about to throw up waterfall. Oh, shit. Yeah. Oh, shit. Yeah, go, go. Yeah, oh, dude.

Oh, my gosh. She's like, are you okay? I'm like, yeah, I'm here to push you. Oh, my gosh. I can't get enough of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember what's my, I think I was like 23. I thought I was going to finally have sex with this girl.

And I was, I was, I started like fingering her. And after like 30 seconds she's like are you a virgin? Oh no! That's brutal! And then she like left my house at 3 a.m. in the middle of a Chicago winner's storm. She's like I got out of here. This was what I was doing with my middle finger.

It was something painful beyond belief. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Let's strategy. I was doing my middle finger something painful beyond belief. Oh, yeah, let's strategy. I was using oh, yeah sticks with me Lindsay. I'm sorry Lindsay with two Z's I remember Are you a virgin? She knew and I was like you nailed it Lindsay. Yeah, you nailed it I did I had another similar thing where it was like, the first time I ever came close to pussy, I just, the classic thing of thinking it's higher than it is. And I'm just like petting this girl's basically pubes. It was so fucking embarrassing.

You just did that. You're bellybutton. You're like, oh. You just did that. Real tight one here. I just did that so long that she was like, all right, we got this over More public school system failed you they always fail. Yeah, it should give us all a little pocket pussy A hundred percent show us what to do. Yeah, everyone should know about finger popping

You know first time you should teach eating pussy while fingering in school popping, you know, first time you teach eating pussy wall fingering in school. They teach the combo probably should. It's worth more than like learning about reconstruction. That's the one you chose. Yeah, you just reconstructed it as I said it. I was like, that wasn't probably the one to say. Uh, I don't know. Whatever, you know, I feel.

Andrew Johnson, here I was, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, I came on the way in. Like a lot was going in for the first one. I like laid down covering fire and just like hit her with some spray and I was like, ah, is this count? And she's like, it doesn't count. You can't post about this. Bro, wow. She gave me another go, thank you.

What a gal. What a gal, women are great. Women are great. Oh no, women are so, that's enough. Yeah, what a go. Women are great. Women are great. Oh no, women are so, that's enough. This is the person I did have sex with, but there was one time, here's how great women are. I think I actually said this on the pod recently, where I, again, I couldn't get hard the first time

I was a girl and I was like nervous because I liked her. So it's such a fucked up thing where your brain is like, I don't like someone, my dick is nice and hard. Yeah. You know what I mean, but it's like, but it's like I actually thought this could be something, and my dick couldn't get hard, and my dick is small to begin with.

So a soft dick. She thought- It looks like an infected clip. Yeah, it was, it looks, it looks, absolutely my foreskin too. She was probably like so bad to her. She thought, that was my hard dick. Oh, and she came back.

Wow. I was like, oh my. Beautiful. You deserve the Nobel Peace Prize. That's body positivity. We're moving back. It really, the last, the final frontier for body positivity. She just wanted to see what it was like when it was soft.

She was like, I want to see the world's smallest penis. Dude, if my soft dick is your hard dick, I can't even do the, I shudder to do the math. And how it's so fucking sweet. It doesn't do a holocaust against the Jews. Yeah. But the micro penis like that. If my hard dick, if my soft dick was my hard dick,

then my soft dick would be like, one of those white watermelon seeds. You know, like not even the impressive watermelon seed, but like the one you could eat if you wanted to. Yeah. Oh wow. Oh jeez. That's beautiful.

So you got over the catholicism guilt shit and you would have fucked anybody that would have fucked up. I got way too into romance. I was like, we can't have sex tonight. We got to get to know each other. And then they got to know me. And they're like, we don't have sex anymore.

This is kind of your shot before I knew who you were. And then I realized, you got to kind of go more. When the door's open, you go through it. Yeah. Then you realize that. Then you also realize, I don't give a shit anymore. Right. Sex is so, it's nothing.

It's just like, is that crazy? Do you think not? No, I have sex once a week with my girlfriend. That's enough. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We like pencil it in. Sure, sure, sure, whatever. I mean, I definitely still have that thing.

You hit the dog every once in a while, but the guys are like, every day I got a full good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have no need for that. Well, I definitely think for me, it's the, you know day I got a full good. Yeah, I have no need for that. Well, I definitely think for me it's the, you know, I'm just such a, like, I'm truly like, what is George saying? Like, gluten, but not even gluten,

like what's the word I'm looking for? Like, it's a bad, it has negative connotations, but I'm just, I can't, what does it mean? You know, like I just, I over do, over consumption, just like, oh, okay, got it. The fuck is the word I'm looking for? Is it one of the seven sins? Glockney would be the one, it seems there.

Glockney is overzealous. I don't know, whatever. The point is, like, you know, good, like, I'll do a bunch of drugs. Over a very indulgent person, right? Clearly. If you're into something, you'll love that. I can really go down a rabbit hole,

whether it's like fucking ribs, whether it's ribs, whether it's pills, whether it's titties, I get in there, and I'll just, and also, it's just not to mention the fact that like, when you don't get pushed, when you're like in that kind of, and luckily we never, we skirted being in solo Jason. Like yes, we were talking about the friends on a little too much, probably.

Oh, I was obsessed with that friend. Oh my god. But we never were like, we never were naked misogynists, right? Like we never, before Reddit became us, Yeah, like we never before reddit became Yes, yes, I really get into that red Yes, yes, but Fuck what was the was the point of shunter make but oh yeah, but there still is something to like that damage of like Feeling like you weren't cool and like at least I have that

But you I still feel like I want women to like make that approval at least I have them. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm still not, I mean I'm saying more nose now. You're throwing the yes out on some questions. I'm throwing yes out on some questions. Oh my god, that's good. I respect that. That's quite a bit. You got to spread the love. Too much. And then it was like for a time I was on the road, I was sober

because I was like I'm getting too fucked up. Oh yeah. So I have to like, I'm gonna be totally sober, I'm gonna smoke weed, I'm gonna run anything. And then I just ended up like fuck, like turning, fucking into a weird person. That was your thing you did after Sheldon said. And that was the thing where it was like,

and so that's not good either. Cause then you have to talk to these weird women and demolein, and then you know, oh yeah, that's terrible. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it would say 60% of the time is good. You've got to have some that ended wildly. And then 20, you know, nothing,

I think everyone, you know, they're all good gals. They're all good gals. And the other thing is like, when you are a big fat over indulgent, horny, like, that's your front facing public persona. No one, everyone knows what's up. No one thinks we're gonna have a nice breakfast tomorrow. You know what I mean?

It's like, you're trying to suck a little dick, trying to see my weird little dick, I'll suck on your titties. We'll watch Diner's Driven's and Dives. Yeah, maybe, you know, maybe I'll talk about your little penis so much. Yeah, I just want to see it. But so I have, I definitely didn't. You're fucking a guy, Fieri, in the background.

I probably literally have a good, a chopped, chopped a lot. You made the thought of food to get more meat Then so funny cuz someone did she's someone's there like is this part of it for you like She was just roasting me just I'm like you know what you read meat But that was that was great. I like how when they played. Yeah. Yeah. But so yeah, I don't know, dude, I'm trying to get that shit. Anytime you don't fuck too long, like it takes a while, you will be dealing with that

one way or another. Oh yeah, they did. They just come to a boiling point. Like, I love it. They're all for like 10 days and I come home. I'm like, honey, we gotta. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They gotta do it. But also it's like, your shit is a boiling point. I'm out there all for like 10 days. And I come home. I'm like, honey, we gotta. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We gotta do it.

But also it's like, your shit is a little different. Like we were just, there was no guilt. There was no love. You weren't raised like Greek Orthodox. I don't know if there's guilt in that. You didn't give a fuck. I mean, the guilt, the guilt you get from Greek people is just the like,

the like how you talk to a Turk today? Yeah. You look like a Banyan in the eye. Yeah, right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right.

You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right.

You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're my dick, so I might dick, but Jeff, we'll get a kick out of it. We had a friend's father was such a Greek villager. Elders wasn't allowed in his home.

No way. To this in recent, like, 2020 or something. No, no, no, it was 1990. And no way, it's worse, because it was like, when I was a child. I was like, first grade. You remember, like, I would be on the outside of the fads of my buddies backyards.

We would go in, we would like bring him sodas from inside. What the fuck? They wouldn't let him inside. I would just hang outside the feds for a little. What did the, I didn't know the Greeks and Albanians had beef like that. I was joking. I didn't know you guys had, I thought it was more Macedonian than Greece. Well, there is, there is no Macedonia.

I was snoring. Macedonia Macedonia this not a great a Greece Macedonia this is a part of Greece. There is no Balkan state that is stealing our fucking name So let's get that straight. Let's go and start there That's funny cuz my friend the guy do my podcast with is Serbia and his parents like you can't date Albanian. You can't date a Bosnia. I love that little F-no-rival race.

Yeah, we don't really get into it with the sir. Albania is kind of like our, that's like the, that's where all our Balkan racism. Sure, they're like the Phil people. We're one ever. Yeah. And we got no beef with, you know, Yugos our, yeah. We got no beef with Yugoslavians, or the former Yugoslavians. What's like the Alabama of Greece? Is it like Crete?

No, Crete is definitely its own thing. Crete probably is closer to the Texas of Greece. Okay. It's like, you know, the Calais is a little bit. Yeah, they're okay. Alabama, I mean, it's just the general, I mean, we have the same shit, it's like Hillbilly.

It's really just not by the ocean in the fucking mountains. In the hills, they're just like farmers, shepherds. Exactly, it's like, and that's what our friend's family was. They were like, they were like that type of, you know, just like, they tell that you're Albanian by looking at you. Or do they have that like that superpower? I don't think so. No, okay.

Probably not, but I mean, we knew, you know, everyone, I mean, we didn't have, I mean, it was never a problem for my family, obviously. Yeah. It was just so fun. It was like, you know, our first little glimpse of that. That's incredible. Yeah, yeah.

Anyway, what the fuck were we talking about before? I cannot remember why I brought that up. Uh-oh, oh, oh, the guilt thing. Yeah, the guilt thing. No, no, no, there is no Greek worth it. I see is, I mean, it's a religion, but no one actually practices. Ridiculous. It's kind of, it feels a lot like, it's more cultural than anything. It feels a lot like, well, how most Jews are now. Sure, sure. Where it's like, no one really gives a fuck about it. It's just like a heritage. You show up on the big holiday, you do that. I mean, I'm sure. The weddings are crazy.

I want to do a Greek Orthodox wedding. They like chase each other around a circle. And like, they're throwing rice. You just stay in the whole time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's so much standing. There were no pews. You just stood the entire time.

Oh, we had no pews. It was in Wisconsin. They had like a huge, great thing. They didn't have pews? No, you just stood the entire time. Because our thing is like, you're allowed to sit half the time. Oh, no, I wish. But they tell you when you can stand up. There was an old lady's wobbly.

Yeah, I was like, you hear a wide just letter, sit. It's like grandma, sit. No, I'm not saying. In my church, you only really had to stand up during the like, during the like, you know, the gospel part. Right. But you could sit down on some board and drink. Was it in Greek still? In Greek, yeah. and end up during the like, during the like, you know, the gospel part. Right.

But you could sit down on some books and Greek. Was it in Greek? Still in Greek. Our church was half Greek. It was like, how I guess some Catholics will do Roman. And they do a little Latin to you. A little Latin to you. A Latin to you.

Yeah. Ars is, you do this, you basically are doing the service twice. Really? Because you do every part in Greek and every part in English. Oh my God. Yeah. It's fucking crazy. It's a sanity. I love that.

I love that. But we don't, we never, I was told like masturbation is gonna make you blind. No. I mean, or whatever. A little bit, but not, but you would just do it. But it's all like a wink and a nod.

It's like, yeah, you can, I don't do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like it was like, like they would say don't do it. And then it's like, you know, my, when we went to Greece, it's like my cousins trying to sneak my 12 year old brother out to take him to a brothel.

Like, you know what I mean? Like, those are the cultural values. We caught him. He didn't rape my brother through a Russian prostitute. Oh man, that's so bad. That's crazy. But like, he thought he was doing, like that's him thinking he's being an awesome older cousin.

You know what I mean? I'm gonna get you statutory race tonight, cause I'm chill. Oh wow. So there was no, there was no like really religious guilt there. It was just more like the traditional, you know, gender, like I left my country for you, guilt.

Okay, you know, like we remember where we're from. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're ungrateful, you know, like I did all this for you, Oh, you, you, the immigrant guilt. Not, yeah. No, no, no, they're an anti gay thread in Greek Orthodox. Yeah, I mean, there's, that's just a world thing. That's just a world thing.

Yeah. It's like, it's this weird thing where, I mean, Greece is so interesting because it's so much of it is tourism, right? Sure. So, any place, even if without tourism, it would have been conservative, like, it's opened to anyone that's going to spend on it. They always have to fake liberalism, said like, it's been, it's been around so long that

it's not even fake. Right. It's like this, like, yeah, whatever, fuck, like they, Greece has always been like, people are tourists there people are traveling through like we got to allow this like infidel shit going on Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but then you spend enough time with people like that and you're like you just The human thing takes over where you're like, oh, yeah, these are fucking right you guys got the gay out thousands of years ago They you were

It's so funny because there are Greek but it's but so like that's the people that that's like, who are invented it? Who are invented it? It's so funny because there are Greek, but so that's the people that interact with gay people from like foreign gay people, whatever. But then you do still have this crazy conservative shit of like, I think gay marriage just was legalized. Oh really? Oh like very recently. And I remember, I remember it was like, I was having dinner with a friend of a friend's family and their recently. And I remember, I remember it was like, I was having dinner with a friend of a friend's family

and their family. So these are people I don't know at all. Like I barely, I know the guy, like, and so I'm like whatever, we were, we happened to be in the same thing. Yeah, I'll go, I'll have some fucking dinner with your family. And like, I also like, you know,

I like when people speak, only speak Greek, because they like me with my Greek. I'm so alone, that's fun. I'm so alone, but you know, you're in America, so I don't get speak only speak Greek. Cause they like me with my Greek. I'm fluent, that's fun. I'm fluent, but you know, you're in America, so I don't get a chance to speak. So I'm like, this will be fun. Just throw me in there, it'll be, and I'm good at, I'm fluent, but I'm like, you know,

the way an eighth grader talks. I really have to pause too much. I have to pause, yeah, I have to pause too much. Dude, these people are like, they happen to be conservative. And that's another weird thing. It's like, I don't know. It's my family's pretty liberal, even in Greece. Like, you know, everyone is pretty left leaning.

And so I didn't, but it does have like, the history of Greece, your history buff, you know, it's like, it's all, it all boils down to people that came from communists or people that came from fascists. Yes. And it's like, there was a civil war after World War II. Yeah, right after World War II.

And so like everyone pretty, so that, so it's like, they've kind of picked a size since then. Yeah, like the left leaning people all kind of have their roots in communism and the right leaning people have their roots in like fascism like who shit, you know, like royalist shit like I'm talking for a little bit. Yeah, we had a weird german king who can suck my dick

because it constantly in our something i don't i don't remember george or something like that it will and philip was born in greece the one the guy who is the prince regent or what the the queens like a military dictatorship

in sixty seven we had it because a fucking social democrat was about to be elected and we can't have poor people have Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah want to say that in Greek. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're learning the fascist Greek. Yeah. Well, something happened around the 40s that, you know, after that, there weren't that many Jews left in Greece. But if they were holiday, yeah, but if there were, they would be thinking that about the media.

Are there not, there's not a Jewish population? Not really, no. There used to be, yeah. Right, like Selenika. There's not a need to be. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm Jewish, pop, huge. But, but soonika. Salonika, yeah. Yeah, I'm Jewish, I'm Jewish. Yeah, huge. But, but so, dude, and they were just straight up like,

and I guess the Republican, the equivalent of the Republicans in Bruce Wayne control, and they're like, you know, I like their policies, man. If he lets homos get married, I don't think I can support him anymore. And I'm just like an eight year old. This was a dinner table This was to this was want two years ago. Oh wow. Yeah, two years ago. Still that's crazy two years ago Wow, where it was just like he was offended to his core right that gay people would be like it was he couldn't even

He felt betrayed on a deep level and it's just like how the fuck, and exactly, we started gayshit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was taut all you played, oh, that's fun. That's what we're doing gayshit. Yeah, that's cool. We are gays with like the whole, the whole, you know, civilization is built on gayshit.

And it's like to turn your back on it as well. And it's crazy, don't forget. I want to know that. Yeah, that's a common. Sometimes it's different. It's a bit of crazy. Don't forget. I want to know that. There you go. Sometimes it's a bit different. Some might say maybe a little more pedophilia. Yeah. Age was different back than you died earlier.

Exactly. It was 25. 12, exactly. You do the proportionate math. Yeah, you're promising 12-year-old 2T that you're teaching geometry. That's like being a college professor. And it's a little wrong when a college professor

fucks a student. Yeah, but it's not crazy. How are you gonna learn the earth is round without fucking a kid? There's no way. It's impossible. They really love fucking kids, man. It's crazy.

Yeah, that's a tough beat for us, but you got to take the good with the bad. You had your hay day. What can I say? You had a good time. But yeah, so no, we just didn't have that shit, but I mean a lot of Catholics I knew had a craze. Oh, for sure. I went to Catholic school. Is there Greek or something like that?

There's Greek school. You would go to a weekend or whatever. I went two times a week and on the week. So yeah, three times a week. Oh, that's a lot. Oh, damn. Okay, I just went to Catholic school just regular. Yeah, yeah, we had to go to mastering school and all that.

Mastering school? Yeah, we had to go like church during school. Oh, okay. That was great. The classes were shorter. They're like, you gotta listen to this pedophile talk. You don't learn math today. Fathers and tons kind of like look at you.

Well, yeah. The opposite. See, at least the Greek pedophiles taught you something. You don't learn math today. Fathers, you kind of like look at you. The opposite, see at least the Greek pedophiles taught you something. Are there Greek pedophiles that's taking you out of class? They hear them talk. Yeah, you don't learn anything from father Tom. No, just like no to use TV. I said, how do I make a fuck?

I was like, I was gonna say to maintain eye contact. Exactly, I'm very good. Respect. There's the Wild West. There's like, oh my, oh. He got me, I drew you. Yeah. Dread of Drew first. Yeah, yeah.

There we go. You got me, I had my hand on the holster. Okay. Cossus and rocks though. I mean, I still have a little like love for it, deep down. Yeah, yeah. I mean, Catholic music is beautiful. That's like a weird, I love.

I like the hymns. I don't know why, something deep down in me most. Stinglass. Stinglass is beautiful. Stinglass hymns in the incense. Because Greek Orthodox is a lot of the shit. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. That is a good vibe.

It's a great vibe. But incense is great. And then they're like saying, vote Republican and kill gay people on the phone. Like, can we just watch football? It's Sunday. Come on. Yeah, I would love to meditate in a church

with like the hymns going in the state. Oh yeah. Last window and you're just like, I would love to just sit in there and like, but I don't want to hear the teachings. Yeah, yeah, there was always, always a complete trash. Sure. Always perverts.

They would like, there was a thing in our score that the girls wore skirts, and the teachers would put like fans by the door. There was like a couple of teachers that were notorious for putting up blowing fans by the doors. You're like, oh, those are the teachers. Those are the teachers. They weren't even the priests.

They were just adjacent. Yeah, yeah, they were all doing it. And we were like, thank you. Thank you. That's great. I wanted to see what were like, thank you, thank you, that's great. I wanted to see what it was like on it there. Yeah, that was incredible. It's so weird that that's like the thing that Catholics goes, the girls got to wear skirts.

It's like God wants the boys to be horny. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How could we learn geometry if we're not half chopped up? There's no way. I know, because it's not like, and it's not like in the rest of Catholic dealings, like women are allowed to wear pants. Yeah, yeah.

So why two girls just wear slacks? Well, you think could wear slacks, but they were lesbians then. That was kind of the unspoken rule at Catholic school. They were like three girls who wore slacks and they wear lesbians. That was just like, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, guys, we know who's going to hell.

It's good to know. Yeah. Actually, our senior year, you know, like in like the yearbook where you win like superlatives, this lesbian couple won best couple and they wouldn't let them be in the yearbook. They had to repote. They're like, we won't allow that smut in the yearbook.

Yeah, they censored them, yeah. That's fucking it. And we're glad they did. We're glad they did. And you're safe for for it. Yeah, they censored them, you know. That's fucking... And we're glad they did. Or glad they did. And you're safe for it. Yeah. And you're so nice. Oh, that's good.

God damn, so do you think the like, when you say you still have some love for a deep down, you just like the traditional aspect of it, are you still religious? Oh, no, I don't know. I think there's some lessons to be learned from it, but no, I think Orthodox religion is, it's obviously stupid. It's great. But like, if you believe in it, you're a complete moron. No offense, but you're a complete. No offense to 75% of the world. Or actually

probably 90% of the world. I think it's probably like 70%. Atheism's on the upward trend. If you combine Christianity and Islam, you think it's less than 70% of the same. You say they're Christian, I would maybe check it on the census, but I wouldn't think that. Oh, you would check it. I think I'd probably would,

because you're raised in that worldview. I'm always gonna see the world through that eyes, whether I want to or not. Yeah, yeah. And I studied religion in college, so I like this shit. Yeah. It's very interesting. If I'm interested. It is very interesting.

It's a crazy that people kill people over. Like that is fascinating. That like people bombed a comic book in Amsterdam because they drew the prophet Muhammad. Like that's wild. That's crazy. It is insane. To this day people will kill over it.

They'll kill over it. We probably shouldn't have even mentioned. No. That's probably a bad call they even mentioned. No, but I'm with you though, because I am fascinated by it, because it's like, especially when you look at the history of Christianity, it's like this little obscure, like, sect of Judaism essentially, where they were, they, like, at that time, like a guy a day claimed to be the Messiah.

Oh, there's so many other prophets. At that time, it was like, there was literally like a new Messiah every, and Jesus kind of flopped in his era. He did, he did flop. Like it wasn't poppin' for like a hundred years. It really wasn't. And then it was just like,

they caught a couple weird breaks with like, they got in the outgird a little bit. So, Christianity got in the out, caught in the out, Christianity's Bobby Althoff. They got in the out. So, it's a little bit. Christianity got in the out. They got it. Yeah. Christianity's Bobby Althoff. Where it's like this? They figured it out. Everyone believes this.

What the fuck happened here? Where it's just like, how the fuck did this happen? Where was I get? It kind of was this weird random thing. And then, yeah. I don't, and then, I mean, I have to look at it more, but I've gotten, I'm getting kind of into like middle ages shit. Oh yeah, yeah. Middle ages is great. It's so interesting, but I guess so much women were in their place

That's when we had rich hunts for good sleeping in the barn. Yeah, where everybody slept with their donkey Well, yeah, that's what I've always thought cuz like Islam is in the year like 1400 Like everyone's like they're so backwards. It's like they're just doing what we did in the year 14 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, everyone's like, they're so backwards. It's like, they're just doing what we did in the year 14. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're just younger than we are, you know. That's also probably not gonna go over well for people online. I don't know. Well, I do think, I mean, I do think, I mean, the,

the, like, I guess before Islam, the, we, like, is it, like the Arab world or I don't know what, like, they were so advanced. Oh, yeah, automatically. Oh, yeah, they invent Al Jibra's named after an Arab. Oh, yeah, automatically They invent algebra is named after an Arab algebra. That's named. Oh shit. Oh, shit. Grimoire doldje bars. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great

The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great

The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great The great Stop to that. You know what I mean? It's like they were crushing it. And then it's like, you know, somebody probably said science is the devil. Yeah, no more than that. And then it's like, and then it's over. Yeah.

Because the church would do that thing too, where it's like, at times it was the most scientifically progressive body. And then they would be like, we're actually gonna burn you. Yeah. And then it's like, yeah. And it was just, so it's like this,

it is fast thing, but yeah. It's just fast thing to look at it from a historical perspective of like, how the fuck did Christianity just become this? It's crazy. We're seeing it right now with Mormonism like that's a new religion that's popping off They're popping all it's like the fastest religion. Yeah Mormonism's like trending up for it's yeah, I cuz people are stupid. It's like Because people are stupid, it's like big in Asia. More men are just like, I'm pretty sure it's going huge in like China and like Southeast Asia.

Mormons are, it's program, they have to be missionaries for a year. So it's like a pyramid scheme. It's just an MLM for Joseph Smith. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's great. That's so interesting. I know it's going.

It's like rapidly growing. Wow, that's an interesting point. But I think what I need right now, Jeffrey, is the smoothest cannabis smoking experience possible. One second. Ah, yes, a beautiful freeze pipe. My preferred method of smoking cannabis. Don't believe me, just watch, folks.

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That's right. You heard it from my Albanian producer. Go to thefreestpipe.com code Stavi for 10% off. Anyway Jeff, I bet you wish you could smoke it, but you haven't earned it yet. Maybe next time. Yeah, yeah. He is actually every like 10 years or so. We got to do, we got to cover that on Cush Brothers, elders. Once a month we do a news program. Oh yeah. Where we get high. And we do the news. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Talk about the Mormon growth. Yeah. Mormons are Scientology's huge. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love that. I'll be fine. We'll cover the Mormon church. We're ready to go to questions here. I'll just read you some time.

Yeah, we're at 56. Let's do some fucking questions. This is good. This is where they leave you voicemails, right? I love this. This is where you're expert thesis as a quarter century of not getting pussy. We'll come in a lot.

It's gonna be a lot of sex problems. It's probably awesome. Great sage advice. Yeah. Probably mostly sex and theology. Okay. Oh, yeah, there we go. Go ahead, L.D. play us in. Hey, guys. Joe. Hey, guys. Joe. Joe. Joe. Big fan of the show.

Yeah, I've got a real real moral dilemma here. So a bit with my girlfriend for about seven months and I love her. I haven't actually told her that, but I do. You're telling me before you tell her. That's fucking wild, bro. If little early to be in love, too, seven months, months come on I go back and forth You know if it feels that way let him say it sure if he's saying it to me. Yeah, yeah, you got to tell your girlfriend You can't tell me before you tell her man. She's like a big fan. She's like he told stop How is he going he's going to call her on hold her back, but I do and I'm really second guessing in a her back. But I do. And now I'm really second-guessing it a bit.

So I went out to her hometown. I would call her out of now and like it out there. But I went to her hometown, which is in the south, and basically her family and her friend said some choice words kind of about well black people. I'm not sure. I mean this makes her racist. That's good to make an East African guest. Just what I'm getting into. I'm putting my legs in the wrong basket here. Yeah, if you could give me a little bit of advice on what I could do here, maybe a test that I could do. A test. A test.

Ask her who the greatest Boston Celtics player is. She says Larry Burr, you gotta get out of there. You gotta get out of there. That's why you gotta get rushed. Well, You gotta get out of there. That's why. Yeah, you gotta get russily. Well, you gotta hear Russell. Yeah, you're looking for Russell. Yeah, absolutely.

Robert Parrish is a cool answer that I'd say a lot of that. Kevin McCale, I don't think that's racist. That's actually cool. I like that. So why did we know what the choice words were? Yeah, maybe, maybe what you mean is choice words. Yeah. I mean, we're up back some of the old time he won.

That's true. Oh, wow. I mean, I think you got to get out. Yeah, I mean, if you can't. Here's the thing, what's kind of giving me pause is that he's like, this doesn't necessarily make the relationship. It's not a deal breaker for him. Well, no, but it is just like, it's like what you want to hear in this situation is like,

this is shocking. I'd never expect this from my girlfriend because certainly plenty of people come from dumb racists families that break out and they're like, leaving a little embarrassed of where they come from. It's like, look, I can't change them. They're my family. We'll have some awkward thanksgivings, but is, like, I'm not getting the sense like his girlfriend is vehemently anti-racist.

Yeah, you know what I mean? Like, is she laughing along to these choice words? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How does she sing Kendrick Lamar when it comes to line, like, so we gotta know? Yeah, so that, now I'm, I'm more into it in the kind of tests he would would like, like what kind of tests are you expecting her to do?

What's a good test to see if your girlfriend is racist racist? I go, you know what I mean, say BLM is it blue lives matter black lives matter? That's a pretty good test. Oh yeah, actually, no joke, get a fucking like thin blue line t-shirt. Oh, yeah, we're in rounder.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, right. Yeah, right. And get a really tough, get like the Punisher. You know what I mean? Like, get some fucking wild shit. Telling her stories about crime in Chicago. Yeah.

See how she reacts. So how scared you are of every big city. Yeah. See how scared you are of every big city. Yeah. You heard this black on black crime, baby. It's an issue and the Democrats won't deal with it. Yeah. I think that could be a good test. Mention homeless encampment.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, does she feel bad for homeless people? Does she think they should be exterminated? Yeah, yeah, yeah guess that's that. Does she think we have some moral obligation living in the richest society in the history of the world to do something about it? Or does she think they're all lazy animals? Does she prefer the alien and farm version of Spoon Criminal? I just thought the original was a little too funky. So yeah, dude, I think, I'm with you though, it's like, because if you're not, if you're

not pick, if you don't know whether she's racist or not, and her family is racist, it's not looking great. Yeah, if she's close with them, it's probably, it's probably if you don't believe it still seeps into you you heard that shit when you were a kid It's I mean this fucking guy still believes in catholysis Some level So you know, I don't know Someone who's fucking racist and shit with a racist fuck family,

first racist fuck family is as close to a deal breaker and off the bat as possible. And so I'm also curious about, like, here's the other thing, it's not just that they say it, it's that this was his first visit. Oh yeah, they didn't have any qualms about saying it. This wasn't like, they can't even hide it for the first visit. Were they sober?

I'd like to know if they were sober. I'd not that it matters, but it'd be interesting if they were did it sober first time. It was sober first time, you're out. You gotta get out of there. They said it before they asked his name. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, you hear what that guy did in Montgomery?

You beat up those poor white people all the way. So, yeah, I'm aiming towards, and it's like, this isn't a friend that you see sometimes. This isn't somebody you play like, pick up fucking hoops with. This isn't like, you know, you're trying to start a life with someone. Can you love a racist? Can you love a racist?

What is that say about you? What is that say about you, man? Yeah, let's say, and like, I know you don't want to get too too ahead of yourself, but it's like, you want to have kids whose grandfather is this guy? You know what I mean? Like that's, that's in the blood. That's in there, yeah.

It skips the generation. They come out. Yeah, they go out even more racist. Yeah. So, you know, I don't know, try some of our patented tests. Yeah, yeah. We have a lot of alien and form. She starts bobbing her head, get out of there. But, yeah, man, now I see why he maybe hasn't told her yet. You know, I think maybe you were right, and maybe it's time to, you know, Malcolm X was a little too loud and out there Yeah, yeah, when her parent with her grandparents never of support and ported Martin Luther King at the time

Yeah, but now now that everything to the right way Now anytime a rocket stone. They're like the the beautiful reverend. Yeah, what have never done that? Yeah, she pro second amendment, but not for the black panthers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's a good one. So good luck, good luck, buddy. Yeah, good luck.

Wouldn't want to be you, I guess. I'd be probably out of there personally. Yeah, I don't think I could deal with that, man. Yeah, that's so that's it. Because we just talked about this in theory. And then I thought about like, if my fucking girlfriends, like not just said one racist thing,

but we're saying it so much it left the markup. Yeah. Like, you'd have to say so. As a guy who my parents are kind of, they have their racist moments. It's not good, it's not good. You gotta really fight back. Racist moments black girlfriend, huh?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My. Yeah. My mom thought she was Italian. She's only half black. So my mom's so I picture like, oh Italian girl. I was like, wishful thinking. Yeah.

That's so thinking. All right. OK, very nice. So yeah, I think I don't, I personally don't think I could fucking do. I think that's all. You're only seven months, say, it's not like you're seven years.

Yeah, I think you get out of that. Yeah. Hit us with another one. Eld Hey, savvy love the show big fan Hope you could help me with an issue. I've been having Have this guy who has done a couple of my tattoos I met him when I was 18 and then also we got a nose piercing. And ever since then I've followed him. I've always kept up with him. I liked his work. But he always, you know, was like in my stuff on Instagram. Like with always in my DMs.

But he's like 12 years old in me and he has a kid, so I was never interested. The pandemic rolled around and I was very sad and bored. So I hid him up and we hooked up like a couple of times. I was like, I've really done 22 year olds. And fast forward a couple of years, the last time I spoke to him was when he did one of my tattoos. This was in like 2021 and he had tried to hook up with me after the tattoo was finished in the shop but I had almost passed out and I also just didn't want to have that problem I also I didn't have consent and I was a little out-cheey booboo on my arm

That's also so wild to be a tattoo artist who knows how much of tattoo can fuck you up and be like all right time to take some time to shine while she's in pay Jesus all right. Skibi moves past out and I also just didn't want to. So I never spoke to him again, but to this day he still like DMs me and like every single thing I do or post on Instagram. And he's also made like very suggestive artwork about me. Like he's posted some drawings of me and just is generally I think it's a great artist. I like to have another tattoo from him. I like to have a tattoo.

I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo.

I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. I like to have a tattoo. yeah yeah um and i like to say like i think it's a great artist and i would love to get another tattoo from him but i just don't want to get fucking assaulted uh... uh... what would you do wow i mean it sounds like he's a one-shot in the right generation town

how good is he the michael jack tattooing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes genius comes with fucked up foibles. Yeah, I don't know. I think there's a, there's got to be another tattoo guy. Yeah, there's got, there's a few tattoo artists in the world. I think we don't go back. No question, no question. He can't be that good.

100%. I mean, look, that, I even think like this is crazy because, you know, you can have a bad experience with like, this is, you know, you can have a bad experience with like this is you know Let's say somebody who's up like a musician or something. It's like that sucks, but and it was weird Yeah, yeah, all right. Well, you don't want you just take them off the Spotify playlist. Right. This is on your body Yeah, that's kind of fun and then people ask you about who did it and you can't be like I mean you could be like he tried to assault me But yeah, that's a weird creep why hooked up with one kids in his marriage It's fucking taking no for an answer

What if it's the tattoos a swastika Everyone's like no one can quite do swastikas like Kenny There's just no one else in the world who gets the angles quite right I'm sure it's a great tattoo. Yeah. So, I mean, there is no, in my mind, there is absolutely no question. You're right.

There's gotta be, there's a different tattoo guy. There's many. And yeah, and like many and many different ones. And it's like, you can even art about that. The art about you is like close to being like, like I understand if you just don't want anything to do as motherfucker so you don't close to being like, like I understand if you just don't want anything to do as motherfucker so you don't want to even bring it up.

But him posting suggestive art about you is something you could be like, hey, don't fucking do that. Like you're being really weird. Yeah, I get that she wouldn't want to reach out to him, but that is tough. That is tough. Yeah, you probably want to let sleeping dogs lie,

but definitely do not get it to this guy. I would even just go so far and say, like, can you get someone to change the tattoo he made? Yeah, I agree. Like, so that you don't have like this reminder. I just say someone else did it. Yeah, give him the credit. Give him a different guy credit.

Say a dead tattoo artist, man. Yeah, yeah, right, exactly. You know what I mean? And so, I mean, part of me wonders, because by the way, this wasn't that long ago. She says they hooked up during the pandemic and he'd like, since then, like, tried to fucking, he came on to her, assaulted her.

And so, it's also possible you haven't really even worked through some of this shit, because it's like a weird, I think you should completely, I mean, I would even say fucking block this guy. Oh, block him for sure. Oh god, yeah. And so, but certainly, certainly, certainly, do not go back to this fucking guy's shop.

Don't get a tattoo from him. Don't, I think you gotta get out, you know. And it'd be, again, it'd be a totally different thing if this was just like, we hooked up once, I didn't want it to go on. He hit me up a couple other times. And he was a little pushy, but I was like, no thanks and he respected that.

That's different. Then I think. The constant DMs. But the constant DMs and the like, this is what he's done, you know, you haven't hooked up with him in, you know, years at this point. And he's still behaving this way.

And it's like, this guy's a problem for you, I think. One way or another, and I would just stay completely shy of him. I would not get involved in this motherfucker at all. And yeah, it's actually, this is a good opportunity for you to break out of your shell a little bit. Do a little fucking research. Go to a different city. See, you know what I mean?

There's better tattoo artists out there. Yeah, where do you think it'll live? She's like, I'm in Mississippi. He's the best. He's the best in Blocsy. Yeah. I was like, I guarantee you good in New York LA, Toronto, Vancouver, you know, wherever the fuck you'll find a better tattoo artist. Yeah, there's no way. He's not that unique. Definitely not. So I came nothing better than a good block on it. It feels good to block. Probably Adam. Yeah. It sucks for one. I feel like we've gotten like a similar call

like this before where it's like, oh, these guys that I used to go on the date with like are just showing up to places based on where I'm posting on Instagram. And like I went out and I wanted to date with them and like the sort of underlying thing that's like similar to this is like, you know, it makes me uncomfortable, brought on a rock the boat or be a bitch.

It's like be a a bitch, dude. Cut these fucking weirdos out. 100% yeah. Like, don't have any second thoughts about just cutting out people with like weird fucking behaviors. You're like not being a bitch. Full of like, you know, just like, you know, like I said, like imagine your friend is telling you

like she's going through what you're going through. Like, what will your reaction be if you hear like someone else going through that? You're 100% right. And I also feel for this girl because it's like, first of all, you're still young. She's still what, 25. But even though the math is still like 25,

she said she's 12 years older than her, whatever. Thanks, she's married too, or had a kid. I wasn't married. I had to kid. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't know that he's married married to or had a kid. I wasn't married. I was a kid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. I know that he's married. Sure, sure.

Uh, so I'm sure was probably also strange here is that I'm sure it's so disappointing to this guy who is very talented, right? She's probably in the, you know, I'm just guessing she's in the tattoos like people who are just starting to get cool tattoos like they save up for them and they really like their artists and they really plan it out. And you're probably really into this culture and it's probably so disappointing that this guy who you thought was this fucking like,

you had him on this pedestal. You're realizing he's just a piece of shit guy like everyone else. Like that's gotta be tough. Cause this guy we feel about D'Aliya. Yeah. Right. Oh yeah, there was never a master of the craft like him.

That's the most easy like fuck that guy of all time. Oh, I know. It's like, it's like, well, I mean, look, you never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose.

You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. You never made me lose. comedy. He was just like, chicken drink impression. Yeah. Yeah. Great. And he was a pedophile. You know, uh, um, so, so like, I'm sure that's so, that's like, uh,

disappointing. And it's also like, this guy's such a fucking loser because it's like, I bet you if he just was like a cool guy that played his cards, right? He could just like, you know, if it was not a creep, I'm sure our friend here might have even hooked up with him a couple more times. Oh yeah. He didn't like her all her stuff and DM her. She probably did too. It wasn't like, two over 18 months. They'd hook up and like, go on. Exactly. Yeah. Until she got into relay, like he's something that he sounds like she like admired him whatever, but um, we also know this is not the only woman he's doing this

too. He's doing this like any female client who's shown any interest. So this is you got to actually you can hope that because it actually be worse for our friend here. If it was the only one of you know obsessing on her. Oh sure. Sure. Just a handful of people because she blocks him. He has enough 15 other women to bother.

That's that's the scenario, right? But yeah, it's like, yeah, in under no circumstances can you fucking get a tattoo from this guy? No. You can't, you gotta, you know, and it's up to you to what you feel comfortable to the level, and I agree with you,

I'll just about be a bitch, whatever, but it's also like, do it to where you feel comfortable. Because some of these guys are like, I shot like that, you fucking buck me, and then they fucking, that's when they go wild. Yeah, you don't want that. So, but definitely keep your distance. This, he's not good enough at that. There's, there's no one good enough at that to make you feel this way.

Michael, Angela. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, you would have to, he'd be able to be so good at that. There's this every second you look at it. Not only do you not think of him, but you just feel nothing, but overwhelming warmth and happiness. That's how good he'd have to be in tattoos, to like, for this to be worth it.

Yeah, I love to see a picture of the tattoos. See how good it is. Yeah, it's not like, it's just like a terrible squiggle. And she just has bad taste. And it's possible. Just like a really bad Bart Simpson face. Yeah, I mean, you're acting like he's the one doctor

in a post-apocalyptic society. Yeah, yeah. And you're fucking leukemia. He won't be cured with the antidote. Yeah, yeah. Cut him off. He's gone. Get him gone.

Next question, Big Eldie. What up, stuff. Love the podcast. First time caller. So I got a pretty fucked up situation. I basically slept with my best friend. And it, like, pretty much ruined our friendship. Classic. Yeah, it was kind of inevitable, like, we were hanging out all the time and it just kind of happened. It's not really anybody's fault or anything

and It was she was kind of really into it because it was just like a bit in thing because she was dating my really good friend for like years She's actually so you know fuck your best friend Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, I was like my friend's own thing she won't fuck me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bad idea. Bad idea. Anyway, so there's way more of this than even let on in the beginning. I'm sorry, go ahead, Elders. And he still doesn't know. And I'm kind of like stressed about that.

I don't think he's going to really care because it's been a while, but it's still just like all this stress with like the mutual friends, the ex, all this messy situation. I've like avoided some parties because I knew that some people were going to be there. She was going to be there. We stopped talking because she was really hurt because I didn't want to date her. I was kind of telling her we should just stay friends and she started kind of like using me as a punching bag and I felt really bad about it because I don't like rejecting anybody and I've been in her shoes so I was kind of frustrating kind of like letting

her kind of take it out on me for a little while and then I kind of cut it all at some point. So yeah basically we didn't want to date because we're going to ruin our friendship. But you didn't end up ruining our friendship anyway. There's no we. Yeah, yeah, she wanted to day you. Yeah. And you didn't want to not date her not to ruin the friendship. That's lunacy. You just didn't want to date this girl. What you're saying is we didn't want to ruin, I didn't want to ruin our friendship, means I want it to fuck her once and then never deal with any consequences whatsoever after that. That's what not ruining the friendship is. So you're being delusional there.

Anyway, finish this and then we can go, we can do the whole thing. friendship is. So you're being delusional there. Anyway, finish this and then we go, we can do the whole thing. So yeah, a question is not really like how to like become friends with her again. Like, I don't really care about that so much, but we're just like, how do you navigate the situation? Because the, you know, in the meantime, I'm like, just trying to see someone else or meet new people, but it's like, really stressful and kind of fucking with my head. Thanks. Yeah, love the show, see ya.

Okay. I think this guy really fucked up. Yeah. That's like you really fucked up. He certainly did is, I don't know what you should have done, but everything wrong, it seems like. Everything the opposite of what you did. Yes, yeah.

You're gonna fuck your best friend. You either got, you gotta talk about it before you do it. You can't just stumble into it one drunk at night. And by the way, I'm a little dubious of your retelling of this, of his retelling. I like to hear her side. I'd be very interested. Because I, he,

did he leave her on? Exactly. Because earlier in the call he was saying, it was nobody's fault when it's like, who the fuck said it was someone's fault? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, to me that says, it was his fault. Oh, yeah.

To me it's like, if you're throwing out proactively, it was no one's fault. She wanted a vacation with my family. I don't know why she thought we were dating. Yeah, I don't know. It seems like Mike on further than, was it once, was it every night for a month? Like, what?

We got it now, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, and it might have just been once, who knows. But it's like, you were a little naive to think that you couldn't, that you didn't want to ruin the friendship. Once you fuck, you know what you're doing, bro. And then, at least there's no going back. I'm not saying you can't be friends with people for you fuck. That's one of the coolest friendships there are.

Sure, sure, I agree. But that feels like winning the lottery, right? When you have a friend who just will fuck you sometimes, you're like, you're the fun coolest person all time. Thank you for coming into my life. I love you more than my family and who I will end up marrying. But the second, because it stays in that realm

which you really just wants to be your friend, but also will fuck you. Sure, sure. It's the coolest thing of all time. You get to rest of everything. There is no feeling weird about it. There's just feeling like you won the lottery. There's just like, it's all dessert.

It's like all dessert with no tummy. This guy tried that, but he fumbled the bag. But he didn't even try that. He tried to act like nothing happened. He was just not in that situation at all. You were with someone who wanted to date you, but because you were already friends, you were kind of lying to yourself

that it was all because of the friendship. And by the way. Like the best friend dated her years ago, like that means nothing. That's like meaningless. In my opinion. No, I think there's something weird there too, because to me, that signifies that,

and maybe I'm getting a little caveman brain here, but it's like, is she really your best friend? She dated your really good friend. Like, did you know her before him? Like, that's a choice of a little... Did you introduce them to each other? What's going on there? And is she truly your best friend

or is this somebody who was, you know, maybe she's a good friend, maybe somebody who's known for a while, who liked you, who started hanging out with you more, who maybe you, this is actually the male version of friend zoning, you do actually fuck them. You know what I mean? We still get to fuck them.

We still get to fuck, right? Like Cherokee ladies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get to fuck and then you're like, uh, change my Like Cherokee, like you see. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You get the fog and then you're like, uh, change my mind. My mind is about to. Same for the product. I won't be making an order.

Where is like women have, you know, women won't fuck you even once. We're like basically canceling after the seven day trials done. You can find like, before they charge the credit card, I'm like, I can't try to. That's enough MGM plus. Yeah.

I saw the one movie I won. I saw the one movie. I was the one Clint Eastwood movie I wanted to see. Does he have to tell his friend? Do you say his like girlfriend? So yeah, so after we just kind of hit him over the head and just shit on him, now let's actually give him some like, and what to do here.

You gotta tell your male friend otherwise you're gonna be skipping parties forever. If the guy's mad, then that's the end of the friendship, whatever. But you can't do this like weird like, will they won't they? A hunt can't do that. 100% what you need to do now is talk to him. You have to stop. You have to and you also have to clear the air with her on some level.

Right. Like you can't leave it in this weird. She was, I let her use me as a punching bag, which what you mean is, you stop. She had valid complaints and I heard them. No, I know, you're doing, this guy is doing so much lying to himself in this question. Yeah. Or it's like, no dude, you fucked up.

You have to, first of all, you have to come to terms with that. That you kind of, it really look at it, and look, maybe we're wrong. We're probably not. But maybe we're wrong here. But really be honest with yourself. And like, did you leader on a little bit? Did you know on some level,

this is how she would react? And you were just using the, again, you were reverse, you were doing the male, like a girl won't fuck you because she'll say we don't wanna, I don't wanna ruin the friendship. And then a guy will be like, well, I don't want to date you. Because I don't want to ruin the friendship, right?

I can't just have everything. Are you just trying to do that on some level? But you have to admit to yourself, you fucked up, and you just have to be honest with her, and you have to apologize. You can't expect to be best friends to, but you should still talk to this girl. You at least need to have this be the thing.

You can be in a same room as her. Exactly, yeah. Exactly. Or you have to give it a shot and you see if it's completely irreparable. And then like, all right, fine. Then I just fucked my way out of this friend group. Right.

And which is, that's, you might have done that. I don't know, right? Or you realize you might have wanted to date this girl. Yeah, exactly. You're the reason. You've been lying to himself. If his other friends are not mad at all, maybe he's like, oh shit, we could date.

Maybe that's possible. Who knows? You know, it's beyond it, probably not, but probably not. Probably not, but try the guess. You've come Kamikaze, this friend group. You might need a new friend group. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Start Pilates, maybe do a pottery class.

You're going to need to meet some new people. Yeah. But because you're, where your boys and your boys are keeping it real with you, you fucked up and you have a, you have an alarming amount of delusion in the way you're describing this to us. Or you're at least, here's what we always say on this show, it's like, we're your lawyers.

So don't light us. Let us make the case to the judge. He's doing a lot of defending himself in court. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, this is not what they show us. We know the law. They show us. You give us the facts and we'll spin it for you, but don't try and spin us. Yeah, could he get her to phone in one time? I'd like to hear her. Yeah, absolutely. That's the first time he talks to her in months. You call stop too. I really want to figure this out.

He's blaming her a little bit. You're just evading. He's just not taking any blame for the situation. He's not red-pilled. He's a little pink-pilled too. He's a little slightly, a little little... Little Pistol-like pink-limbing-ish. Yeah, I think.

A bit in there, brother. I get it. I get brother. I get it. I get it. I get it. And yeah, and even the like saying he's prostrating himself and weird shit like that, it's like no, you were just getting it. She was punching man.

Like she was mad. You did something fucked up to her, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Like you probably did a little something fucked up to her. You kind of whispered some sweet nothings to her and then in the morning you're like, I didn't mean that. Yeah, yeah. It was like post-nut, clear. We're about I didn't mean that. It's like post-nut.

Claire and me. Yeah, I was like that post-nut babbling. I love you. We should really date. Yeah. And then the morning he's like, fuck. I didn't mean that. That's all I thought.

We've all done that before we got in there. We've all been there. That's what you were doing. But it meant exactly. And knitting is the first step. And admitting it to yourself first and foremost, because you're just in the future, the rest of your life, when you fuck up,

not being honest with yourself will just make every situation worse. And I think you're doing a little bit of that. I think you're just, you're a little embarrassed of your conduct, you feel, you fucked up and you don't, you just gotta take some responsibility. Sure. And at least to yourself.

At least to yourself. Yeah. You can't be in this fucking weird lying about what really happens. And you can't be not going to parties and being around people. You gotta do something. Yeah.

Either cut out the friend group or figure it out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. know if you fucked up that friend group or if you need to move on. But anyway, a great one. Let's get a couple more here. That was a good one though. And you know, it is, he's pretty young. It sounds like we've, you know, hopefully, what if it's like a 55-year-old guy talking about his best friends, 50-year-old man's eye, my best friend. Still going to house party. Yeah. Cool.

Hey, stop, Rose. OK, so a few days ago, I drove all the way from Philly to New York. Not that far. Not that far, because the girl had invited me there. And I was like, turns out, she just find a hangout. I was expecting a little more hoping for a little more. This is the third time it's happened that I thought it was gonna be a day but turns out she just wanted to hang out. This has happened to me

different, at least three different times to different girls, different women. And so yeah basically I don't know, like, how do I appear desirable? Did I call in? Yeah, what? Are you calling in from, I was like, was it for you seven years ago? Oh my god, this is why. A time machine.

Here we go. Go ahead, Eldis. But like, more than that, like a sexual or romantic relationship, I don't know. How do I give off those slides? I also don't get that many matches on Tinder. So, yeah, 21-year-old guy, like a little feminine. I don't know if that's far of the reason.

Deportament? Yeah, I don't give off those slides, but yeah. Hopefully you can help me out. Love the podcast. Yeah, I don't give off those photos, but yeah, hopefully you can help me out. Love the podcast Yeah, bye. Okay. Oh wow, buddy. This is the 21 year old guy getting this he's basically saying friends owners saying the same vibe Yes, yes, I mean you I'm sure he's doing what I was doing where you just like you're there little bitch boy She's like want to come over and watch enchanted or something. It's like, you gotta, you're always going from Philly to New York, but you gotta get her to come to Philly first.

And like, I think I'm sure he's like sitting five feet away from her on the couch. He's like, I never made a move. I don't know why she didn't wanna fuck me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you gotta, you do have to make a move. Yeah, try. I mean, obviously not like pushing it too far,

but where arm-rounder and still it happens. Get a have to make a move. You have to try. I mean, obviously not like pushing it too far, but where arm-rounder is going to happen. Get a gun. Get a gun. Get a gun. Tell her something's going off in this house tonight. I think that's the solution. The gun will always fix things. That is good.

20-year-old. Little feminine, I think women like the feminine. I don't think that's a problem. Plenty of feminine guys. Stephen Tyler has done great. Prince for crime sakes. Yeah, I say. They're very feminine and huge.

I don't think that's a problem. It doesn't necessarily have to be, you know. It's more, yeah. I think this guy, he's 21, he probably doesn't quite know how to tell her. Just tell her. Just tell this girl. I thought this was a date and see what she says. Like just be honest.

Yeah, I mean, I do think a big thing here is just being up front with your expectations and, you know, what you, like, this is kind of, I, again, we've all, you have three experts on this panel right now. And a big part of clawing my way out of this was just like being pretty upfront and being like, you can just ask, is this a date? Or like you're going to find a way to do it. I have asked girls out and I'll be like, yeah, you want to hang, keeping casual, be like, you want to hang out sometime and they've deflected and been like, oh yeah, we can like, you know, get a call for yourself.

And I'm like, hey, I just want to be open with you. I'm asking out on a date. So it's good, I don't know that, no worries, but I just want to know. And some of them said no. And then some of them been like, oh, and in that, just be kind of, they respect that.

They respect that. Yeah, whatever, yeah, let's do it. I mean, I studied abroad in Ireland with a girl, and then we came back to America. I flew from Chicago to DC to hang out with this woman, and I just slept on her couch for three nights. No, she's getting fucked up. Even though she offered, she's like,

you could stay in my room, and I was like, oh no, but then I was mad, like why would she fuck me or what? I was like, because I was like too scared to make the move and like dude in high school and I just go I spent like three hours in my car parked in a secluded place like smoking weed with a girl after like a date. Oh for sure. I just been like fucking bitch. Yeah. I was like, what is she on my pants? I was like, she's like a'm big without me making the hints of romantic

implications. These women probably think this guy wants to be friends. It's true. They might have sent in the same call. They're like, this 21 year old keeps driving from failing and one fuck man like, you have to. Yeah, the thing is, no one is gonna unzip your flying suck your cock.

Yeah. You got it. At least not yet. You got to work your way up to meet some of that. Right, you got to like, make a to meet some of them like make a move. It's tough, I get it. I don't know. Yeah, no trouble getting friends, but it's like sexual romantic friendship.

So yeah, dude, unfortunately, you're not even unfortunately, you were just gonna have to start out. You're not a swing, you got to swing to hit a home run. I don't think it is. I don't think it is. It's not feminine, it's that you're passive. That's what it is. Which we associate with women because they're weak.

No more kidding. But plenty of like, there's plenty of feminine horn dogs out there that'll like, you know. Oh god, yeah. That'll like, you know, see it won't be like, we should mix our lipstick colors. Yeah, I like it. And then just fucking go in.

Yeah, let me do your lipstick. And then get all these tippedos going for a kiss. Right. Yeah, Prince had no trouble being a little feminine and just fucking every in. Yeah, let him do your own stick. And then get all his tiptoes going for a kiss. Right. Yeah, Prince had no trouble being a little feminine and just fucking every woman in the world. So yeah, dude, there's a little bit of like, you can't be going from Philly to New York. You can't be like.

With no expectation or with no definitive expectations of what's happening. Yeah, you're just gonna have to start asking. And you know what I think a good piece of little homework for him would be, is like, your homework is to get rejected 10 times. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because when you're expected to get rejected,

you're like, oh, another can happen. So it frees you up, and then guess what? You might get a couple yet. You know when you're like, there's no way this girl's gonna be to say yes, go and think you're gonna get rejected. It provides a little armor for you, and then you might gonna get rejected. It provides a little armor for you. And then you might not get rejected.

You also get more confident when you're more attracted to that episode. So go in knowing it's gonna fail and be like, hey, you look very beautiful. Would you like to go on a date sometime? Yeah, yeah. For a drink. Most of the girls will say, you only need one.

You only need one. You only need one. Yes, absolutely. And most of the time, I don't know. You're not gonna waste your time. He's wasting a whole day of his life doing this for this woman like, cut the shit, man. Yeah.

Get on that grind mode, come on. Yeah, unfortunately it's just, my guess here is, like all of us, you were a little afraid, you didn't wanna get embarrassed, you're, it's hard to get rejected, you just have to get over that. Yeah.

So your homework is to go get rejected at the time. You're in this fan, get rejected. You just have to get over that. Yeah, so your homework is to go get rejected You're in this fan he's in this fantasy like I'm so nice and good looking. How could they possibly not come on to me? Yeah, how could they not want to hook up with me? It's like they don't you got a yeah They don't even know you're interested. They might not know you're interested. Yeah, you got they got he does seem nicer than unless He doesn't even seem pink pill. He just seems like he's just a good. When we got it, yeah, which is fine that women can love that, but yeah, I got to say them say something. Yeah, yeah, I mean, it's tough because sometimes those

Timid guys end up with like the loudest, most annoying woman you've ever met in your life. Yeah, because they won't shout each other. Right. They won't say no to say no. And they also love it. Like part of them like kind of likes that. Right. And so unless you get a loud annoying bitch in your life, which doesn't happen every time a guy.

Every time a guy. He just dommed. We don't know. Could be. A lot of different stuff going on. Yeah. But you just gotta put yourself out there and you gotta be explicit about like,

you have to clear with what you're looking for. And just like, you know, that it does happen sometimes where it, like, you have to clear with what you're looking for. And just like, you know, it does happen sometimes where it's like, if someone just won't even consider you, unless you make it clear, they won't consider you not in life. Yeah, they don't even see you as a sexual being. They mean to imagine it. Yeah, and you put that in their head and it's like, look, they might say no, like, when they're thinking about it,

they might say no, but they might say, it's happened, like yes, most of the times you ask someone out and they try and steer it to like a friend thing. 70% of the time it's like, nothing's gonna happen. But it's happened to me multiple times, where I've just been like, oh yeah, I'm not interested in that kind of relationship, but if you wanna kind of date casually, you let me know. Sure.

It's like, there's been a few, I've had a couple nice kind of like fun relationships. Oh really, okay, that's nice. That's good. So it is, it's possible. But. So this guy said, he said he doesn't get that many matches on Tinder.

I used to get so depressed about stuff like that. That like women, I'm so ugly. It's like, it's just an algorithm. Yeah. Most guys don't get matches. Yeah, you're wrong. Yeah. It's women and just like the biggest piece of ass you've ever met in your life gets matched. Or some guys, any asshole over six three.

Sure. Get more matches than they deserve. It's just things. Yeah. You just don't have that. Don't read too far in it. You know how it's putting that shit in my profile. Oh, yeah.

Of course you got it. Oh, are you six three? I was saying you stand up. Six six six six six six of six you stand up yet You just put six six that's your whole profile Nice Hey, don't want to overdo it. Yeah, yeah, six six will be like come on Six four is good six four is good six four is enough. Yeah, yeah, this guy could be very ugly We don't know that you can't even if are though, you can still get pussy come on

Absolutely, and you just just be a night like you're your two most guys are not as nice as this person Yeah, you most guys need to be nicer. You need to go to the opposite way and just be just stand up for yourself a little Yes, yeah, say what you want a little more. It's hard and it's tough to get rejected But that's why we're telling you go get rejected 10 times and then call in and let us know how it goes. I feel like he also needs to just put this New York girl on the shelf. It's not happening. Without question. I don't know that. Oh, that's too much better to talk to this one.

I'm sorry for not making that clear. Absolutely. Don't do that. That's shit anymore. This woman is out of your life. I will say this for away games. I will say this. I would say, actually this would be a good first step is to be like, hey, I just wanna,

like you could have that, hey look, I've been joining Hangout with you, but I'm not really interested in a platonic relationship. I'd be interested in dating, you know, if you wanna go out some time, you know, let me know. Sure. That actually might be a nice first step to like, you know,

but that might be good for him to kind of practice doing this kind of shit, right? With this one who's already basically rejected him, why not just throw it out there, yeah? But make it feel that first, instead of that like kind of, you're always, it always stings when you're like friends with a girl that you've just desperately want to like, not even, it'd be one thing

if all you wanna do was fuck her, you wanna like fuck her and then like, you know, watch reality TV together afterwards. Talk about death. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think you want it. That's a stinging constant rejection where like this will just be like,

it'll feel bad for like a couple days. When you get the definitive note and then you wanna see, we'll move on from it. Yeah, yeah, you need to get, you gotta get to get out of there, but you know good luck. We've all been where you are Yeah, help you help you do it before 25 Start bubbling up You're gonna have a lot of what dreams Oh, yeah, I'm sure you were good. I had a

Even jacking off. I didn't jack off. That's I still I yeah, I didn't jack off till Just before I lost my virgin Never into jacking It's fucking Indian food Parents didn't like it so I didn't do My parents didn't like it so I didn't do it. Yeah. Yeah. It'd be diarrhea.

Yeah. Oh my god. That's fucking, so I do it and it is. It's better than sex. Usually. Yeah, all the time. I love a girlfriend, but it often is. Yeah.

See, we really were different types of like not getting pussy 20 year olds. Yeah, because I was curiously jacking off. Without, I was just like getting hard and then being like, that's the end. I was like imagining hooking up hard. Oh, we're done. I thought, I didn't really know what masturbating. Well, I've never watched porn.

I'm not a porn guy. Never. I have my friends forced me to once in college. Wow. That's it. I'm not a porn guy. Yeah you call me now? You're just imagination. Just thoughts. Yeah, or Instagram I like a butt butt pictures. Yeah, okay, I gotta do that. Okay, foreign never my I No, but not even news just like a nice new I like

Not even Nude's just like a nice ass. Not even a Nude, I like a close up. Like a close up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Praise, yeah. I'm not into the whole thing. I'm not into the whole thing. Yeah, I'm too, that prude will never leave. Wow.

Torn like disgust me. Wow. I think that's a little on me, but I just am not. It doesn't turn me on at all. And so you must have never really gotten into any, like, you know, you didn't, like, I assume once, before the relationships, like you were out there really hooking up, you just fucked a handful of girls up.

I had like a little period where I did, but not that much. No, I think I've had like, sex like 12, 15 when we got a lot. Yeah. That's, that's, that's probably good enough for me. Yeah. I'm seeing it, I think. I'm, I'm, I'm, I need a little more of that thing.

I need that, dude. I like the idea of sex, but then when it happens, I'm like, more of that. I need that dude. I like the idea of sex, but then when it happens, I'm like, ah, I could have been watching TV. I couldn't read in a book. It was kind of a waste of five minutes of my day. It's so fucking hilarious. I feel a weird fucked up sense of like accomplishment.

Oh sure, there is a conquest of the new person. The conquest is a weird term, but you know what I mean? It is. That is fun. And then just like afterwards, I'm just like relaxed. Sure. Like this was great. Yeah.

The positive affirmation is, that's a great feeling. It's very interesting. Well, a lot to get, when you come back for Kush Brothers, we'll have a lot to cover. Yeah, I would love to. We'll take a little jacking off. If our listeners who tune in for hard news will allow it. We'll take a small detour into jacking off. There we go.

I was big into AOL, you know, remember AOL and St. Messinger. I, for some reason, I was big in like the horny chats. When I was like 14. I was like dirty talking, but I didn't know what it was. I was like, I'm gonna take my penis and put it where it belongs. Because I didn't even know I was like, I hope they tell me. Where should I put it?

I don't know. I was like a scourge in those chowings for like three months when I was maybe like ninth grade. But not jacking off, just get hard. Just get hard and maybe a little come would dribble out You probably stop getting wet dreams like 15 I was 25 dude I've had maybe two in my whole life. Oh, I had like 50 probably yeah, I just thought that's what happened Those every once in a while the lake overflows over the Hoover Dam and just dumps a little come on your back

Damn dude dude. Dude, we were, now what were the what dreams about? They were usually about some girl in high school, probably. Some girl I was in love with that way. Yeah, yeah. Or like, so fear for Garra. So what were you even, SI swimsuit addition was huge for me. Okay.

I was big and every year came an April I think. But you wouldn't jack off to it. I would just look at it and I'd be like, who the, I like this girl. And then. What the fuck? I can't even fathom it. Yeah, I like body paint issues. Yeah, okay.

That's insane to me. Ashley Graham, she's doing it from here. Oh yeah. When Ashley Graham came on the scene. What a time. That was big. That was big. Dude, I can't even, this is, I'm short circling, I can't.

Yeah, the point is that it's people off, I know it. But not even, okay, the point thing is one thing. Yeah. I could, I mean, it's weird. Yeah, yeah. But it's like, I kinda see it and I almost respect it. It's like, it's like somebody who's like, you know, somebody who's like, not, somebody is a flip phone.

Sure. That's what now watching phone is. You know what I mean? It's like, it's like, flip phone. That's what I was in phone is. You know what I mean? It's like good for you, man. I wish I could do that. I can, I'm addicted. That's how I feel about the point of it. You see, I've never, I don't, I don't porn hub.

That's the one. I don't even know the other website. I've never been to porn hub. I don't even know what it looks like. Look at you. I have no idea. That's crazy. I think I should do it once.

Just once. Well, I remember I watched this woman's sweet Nancy get plowed and collared. She's sweet Nancy. My friends like made me like clockwork orange like watch. Watch. Pull up sweet Nancy L.

This I was. Like I remember exactly. There's something about sweet Nancy porn. I don't remember exactly. Nancy sweet might have been Nancy sweet. Just an image. It was her. Is that her?

I think that was her. Yeah. She was in a field on a picnic plank. Get it in a bunch of men, fuck her. That's enough, we don't want them to get hurt. I see this, this is it. No, I'm not into that. I don't know.

That's nothing to me. So, that's one thing, right? Some clothes, nuns though could have gotten me going. That's what I'm saying, is like, look, I get that in the no porn, but like not jacking off. Yeah. That's the thing that I can't even. I almost didn't even know what it was.

That's cool. Like our Catholic school, they didn't tell us it was wrong but we just didn't have sex ed. Or maybe I was black down during it, but I don't remember it. I literally didn't know what masturbating was for college. College? I knew it would get existed by the early,

friends weren't even talking about. I didn't know what you did. I didn't know what the, I mean, I remember like even know what you did. I didn't know what the... I mean, I remember, like, everyone, sometimes early on, people would come up with their own weird ways to beat off. Oh really? Until everyone got the... See, I don't do that either.

What do you do? I fuck a pillow. You fuck a pillow? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I fuck a pillow. What the fuck? Pillars around America. Many red red red red red red red red red. Yeah. That's what you call jacking on. I fuck up Pellows around America many red

That's what you call jacking up Fucking pillow Yeah, yeah, sleeping bagger a blanket sometimes, but mostly a pillow That's it dude, I've never done the hand thing like I'm not into it. I'm not I'm not tracked I'm not attracted to my hand I'm not I'm not tracked I'm not tracked into my hand. Oh I'm like that's you I hate it. I hate me Fucking crazy dude, you know what the really gross part as I used to I've stopped a couple years ago Because my friends told me this is gross. I would just come on a pillow and not I didn't have it

I just come would go on the pill and I had this dirty come pillow under my bed I didn't have any I've just come would go on the pill and I had this dirty come pillow under my bed Yellow and crusty and like it was really it was really disgusting. I admit that was wrong That's what like break it out my girlfriend's like oh god. It was better than Holding your dick in I can't I get I don't do anything. I never be able to do it so insane I've like humped a pillow up before but it's usually I'm on it. I'm riding You're on top missionary Calla You should it's fun try it out. I think I'm gonna real thick like temper pete pick pillow

Where does your dick? I don't so your dick just rubs Yeah, just like mash his into it. Yeah, I guess it's there's no in you're not It's just against my body really I'm just coming right in my Stomach yeah, then fuck your hand Into my stomach I guess that's what it is. Oh shit. People always yeah I didn't realize that was weird till I said to my friend like a year ago and he's like what the fuck? No, it's one of the most fucked up things I've ever been. I thought it was half the world does hand half of them do a pillow

That's crazy, but I thought that's the whole world. But I will say it's what I was just getting to where it was like Early when you're like 12 to 14 or 12 to 12 to 13 you know it's different for different people yeah everyone early jacks off in a weird way they found out where some people were pillow humbers oh yeah that's everyone says like that was I just learned it at 25 so I'm doing the 12 year old thing that's the thing you're developmentally like made out of it out of it in a'll be like, oh, my hand is sexy. Yeah, maybe I will. No one thinks their hand is sexy.

I know, I know. That is a funny way to think of it though. Like, I love my fucking hand. Yeah. But like, everyone, but then you just grow into, you know, there's some knowledge that gets passed down or something. Yeah, someone tells you like, you don't fucking

out with shit. I would literally like rub my dick on my hand. Oh really? It was like a fucking prehensile clip. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're just flipping it and flicking it and you're like, oh, wow, early on. That's how I jacked off to, you know what, I will say, maybe very early pillows were involved. But I think I was like rubbing a pillow. Oh, sure. Yeah, and I was I was jacking couch. I feel like that's I've never done that actually that barbaric, but the pillow that's a gentleman's game. Yeah

Some of these hotels have great pillows too They give you eight of them. You gotta use it. Come on. I'm doing it on every one of them. Let's start bringing pillowcases Oh, yeah, I do come on the pillows in a hotel I'm on made I leave it to finally I a little donation at the end. Yeah, as long as stays on the pillowcase. Yeah, yeah, oh god It is disgusting saying it out loud, but we're all dogs deep down. Sure, sure, sure, a little bit. Fucking wild.

No, that's an insane way to jack off. And I wonder how, like, that's another thing. Like, you can't do that as an old man. True. There will be a day my knees will give out. And I'm like, I can't do it. Put the pillow on me, Sharon. I'll have to do it.

Yeah, they'll have to move it against me. Yeah. Oh, that will be a dark day. Yeah. I feel like you will probably start jerking off normal in the next year or so if you just sort of shacking off. I gotta see you always put lotion on your hand.

No. See, I don't even know that. Okay, I see those lotion. Yeah, I think lotion, it doesn't need to be a hold. Doesn't have to be a big two. Oh, really? You just write, just like that. You just write a big to do. Oh, really? You just just Just grab your bacon start my hands are kind of clammy. I think that's what it comes down really to

I'm really reading into the hand Extension of your brain exactly It's not really hung up on the him that's first step of getting over this. Don't think of it as your head. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're dig getting jacked off Oh sure sure someone's hand you're just jacking off. Yeah, yeah, and that's why not watching point is because I mean you probably have to close your eyes And think about it. Yeah, yeah, I just put two celebrities together Joan of Arc and Denzel washing Jonah, Varkin, Denzel, Washington. Okay, we're going. Okay, never thought.

Yeah, it's beautiful. I think the pill of thing, I probably will change one day. No porn, I'll never watch porn. And I respect that. I'm at the point where I'll never will. I respect that. I think the imagination is the way to go. Yeah, for sure.

I enjoy that. Keep your dick harder too, because when you're beating off the weirder and weirder things, is there a point where you have to keep topping it every little bit? It's just so specific where you're beating off the weirder and weirder things, is there a point where you have to keep topping it every a little bit? It's just so specific where you're like, I love a fat-titted Colombian with blonde hair. Does it get that specific?

I don't even know that. You can do any race. You can get whatever you want, brother. Like a Puerto Rican plumber. You could buy that. I mean, you get that. I mean, probably the Puerto Rican's getting fucked by the plumber. If I had to guess, but you know, that's out there.

Yeah, okay. Or the poor guy has a huge cock. You know, like that's okay. Whatever way you want to do it. They're into that. Yeah, but yeah. No, I was, I hope to wean myself off pornography someday. I think that, I think that's good.

I hope you do. We'll get there someday. And I hope to use my that's good. I hope I hope you do we'll get there. We'll get there someday And I hope to use my hand one Why don't you fucking have some oh fuck we should have maybe we'll put this earlier to we should say that you have a special That on YouTube. Oh yeah I do it's special on YouTube the only funny white man. You'll find me to know if it's to the Greek people. I don't consider them to be white. Not wise. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're not in competition. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Please go watch the special. I'm very in the hole. Please go watch it. Please go watch the special it's good good special very funny Go see Jeff live

Yeah, go to white comedian dot com. I bought that URL in 2014 I pay $80 a year for it. Please make it worse by white comedian dot com The best thing I've ever done in my life I'm touring everywhere with this God for sake and so do. Whitecomedian.com. I'll just play one nice one to take us out. Let's do one more. Let's do it.

Bobby, baby, what's up, Matt? I have a problem and I think that you are just the man to solve this for me. A single guy in the city every once in a while as you have a witness stay over and I have a consistent issue where I'll be trying to go to sleep and I will just have a pounding headache. And it dawns on me recently like holy shit, this is a dick pill headache. What are your tips to avoid that? Like is there a specific like milligram that you have dialed? That is also a headache. Any like, you know, pre-ear post routine that helps you avoid headaches. Yeah, I really wonder, because these headaches sucks, but I also don't want to stop taking a nice tick, they'll have a nice rock hard car. Yeah, for a man and he and he advice is appreciated.

Wow, I've never taken a dick pill. I don't know. Nothing about this. Yeah, are you a you a devotee? Yeah, big big dick and again, which one what's your company? That's the thing. We can't say that for free.

Oh, all right. That's fair. And I want this another moment to the dick pill, dick pill, tablet people, general men's health, how about the men, we'll call it the men's health segment of advertisers, you're losing free money. This could have been such a natural place. Oh, a natural place.

For us to put in an ad for your product, I would like nothing more than to be the spokesman for male performance. Oh, they should definitely have. I mean, the audience is, it's crazy. It's crazy. You're losing money.

We're both losing money. Yeah. Both me and your company's losing money every day. Tatum is not working the way. It's the free market's not working the way. Everyone talks about the free market, but me not having a dick spill sponsorship is proof positive that it does not work.

That is not work theology is bankrupt. It will never work. It will never fucking work. I don't, you do take a, you do take a meaningless pill. Yeah, so I've taken a pill or tablet will, I won't say. I would love to do, I think I want it. Does it make you last longer Yeah, it makes yes, it does okay, and it makes you able to you bust once you get right back in this

Okay, I'm doing hour It takes so long I'm like I'm already on to the next thing Okay, I got to try this But you do I know this headache is real look you got to pay the. But you do get a look. You got to pay the cost to be the boss. You know what I mean? You can't wait. You don't got to add fill to the only kind of pills.

You got your homer dick pills. Come on, buddy. You want a hard dick or not? Take a tile and all bitch. Take a fucking tile and dick this fucking bitch down. I mean, this is- This happens every time. No, it does. I think probably you're overdosing,

this guy's probably overdosing a little bit if I had to guess. You're probably, cause you get into this thing where you're like, well, I can't, there's nothing worse than taking a dick pill. It doesn't even work. See, mine's all overdue.

Yeah, sure, I think there's the, I have certainly, I mean, listen, I've been dealing with the, I've been dealing with dick pills and Dick pill and different stuff since gas station dick. Oh you join the trucker Not anymore, but I've some the horny go. Yeah, shit like that. Oh my god. There was a time in my life where I was taking like This early on before you could get them everywhere There was like you could buy them from a research

get them everywhere. There was like, you could buy them from a research chemical facility. Oh my God, I've heard of that. And you would have like pipettes. You put it on your tongue, you would just all drop. And but no one tells you what those, because they're not, you're not technically supposed to take them. Wow. They're for research.

Everyone knows the fuck they're, yeah, yeah. You buy a lot of shit that way. And so I was fucking, I still growd out. You buy a lot of shit that way, and so I was f***ing out. I was still a road thing. You buy this, I was still a c***. It wasn't quite still a road, but it was like, the way I paid for it was Venmoing a guy. And putting like, he asked me to put like lunch in the subject.

So it was like, some guy was stealing from a research just giving you pipettes of saltwater. And you're like, it gets me hard. Yeah, it's all right. And it was so hard. Let me say's all right. It was so hard. Let me say that was a strong placebo effect if it was, but I mean, there were times where I like fucked and then I would like stand up and be like,

oh, you can see. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's all the best somewhere else. So I, now I'm very careful about those. And the last thing I need is to die due to dick pills. And, you know, there have been times, you know what I mean? There have been times.

You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean?

You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean?

You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? the killer. Yeah, just bleep that out, others. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I forgot, no man, no brand name. That's okay. Your inclination is for specificity. Yeah. You're a good comedian, but you know, we just, we can't. We can't. Sumerus capital is mine. We just not see around that.

I just love roles. But you know, it's important that we, we don't, we don't, no, no free lunch on the stop his role podcast So yeah, maybe experiment with a little lower, you know dick pill dosage personally my friend and look to avoid the headaches do everything you would do to avoid regular headaches You know make sure you're hydrated hydrating Eating eating a full stomach probably don't do them an empty stomach. Yeah, not a, yeah, but they are more effective on them. Oh, man.

Yeah, okay. You know, there's, there are again, give and take. Give and take. So do you want a nice rock hard cock or not, buddy? That's what it's all about. That's the thing. That's the thing. So, you know, also you sound kind of young

and what's going on with you, pal? Like, again, not because I don't have a sponsorship yet, I can say, maybe you don't need dick pills right now. Sure. Maybe, I mean, I know, I'm just fat as fuck now. Like, I'm past the point where nature has stepped down. You can't get hard with all the fail. I can get hard, but you know, it's just more of like

the, you really want to know. It's a will they won't they type thing you want to know. Yeah, the percentages are like I'm still usually like If I'm if my dick is a casino the house is still winning but you know Couple couple lucky jackpots couple more jackpots that I like have gotten through You know I mean parlay with your There's definitely like you know some card counters come in they can exploit the system. We'll put it that way with your dad. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no because they're like, yeah, you're a fucking glutton. You're like, you're with these loose women,

you don't care about, which is not untrue. All of this stuff is not, like, they're not completely off-base. Like, my dick was the hardest when I was in love. You know what I mean? And so I've gotten very fat and I haven't been even close to in love and, you know, whatever. And so I'm living wrong, right? There's that's why you can't get hard. I think it's a little bit too fat and, you know, whatever. And so, I'm living wrong, right? There's that's why you can't get hard.

I think there's a little bit of a two-fat and you know, which is actually, I actually think they're right. Love will get you hard. If I was in better shape and cared about, not that I don't care about, but you know what I mean? Like, I love the people, the person I was having sex with, it would be different.

So, for our young friend here, it's like, what are you doing to need these dick pills? Is it just a nerve thing? Because even when I was younger, I might take one because my nerves on the first hookup I was always nervous when I liked it girl. You want to like impress her? You got the hardest cock you ever say It ain't gonna be big so it better be hard I don't know where the clip is but I'm hard. Yeah, it's like McDonald's the same, which is our hot.

You know what I mean? Mickey, these sends you a cold fucking Macchick and you're pissed. You know what I'm saying? So that was kind of my philosophy. On the first one, maybe see if I get juice up a little bit. Sure, sure, but then after that, I wasn't using Nick Kroos. You sure they're real you. You should let her see what I'm like.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. But with you, my friend, I would just say, you know, what's going on here? Are you listening to your doctor's orders? This is a little toxic masculinity, possibly, that you have to. 20 years old, I got it. I think I know the other guys are doing it or not.

Yeah, I got to do it. Yeah. So I would say, ratchet down on the dick pill on the dosage for the headaches, and also, you know, they, you know, like we said, get a little exercise, drink some water, all that good stuff. But also think about why you're using dick pills. Do you really need to use them, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

So good luck with your little, and look, plenty, Eldis has mashed his three quarters hard dick into his girlfriend for the last couple of years. Eldis refuses. They're not using the pill. Eldis is on natural. No, no, look, I'm it. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill.

I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill.

I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill.

I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it's gonna pill. I think it, but I don't know I just I'm with you and you're young Yeah, I get them not wanting to do it. Yeah, yeah, and it's yeah, it's like you know because that shit is really meant for like Old men sure you can't get their Dixhard so you know, it's fun for a stunt But you know, it's also like a heroin thing. You know heroin's got to feel awesome Especially the first time yeah, especially the first time you take it. Especially the first time you like take it. Oh yeah. Yeah.

No, the joke that keeps getting cut out of specials, but I will put in one at some point is that taking dick pills feels like lowering the rim to like seven and a half feet. It's like, I can dunk. Yeah. You know what I mean? I'm in the book.

I am fucking this bitch up. I'm fucking yeah. I've always had to lay up dick, you're my whole life. And now I'm dunking. You're right, that's true. But I'm also like, I don't know. If my dick just doesn't get hard sometime, I don't really give a fuck.

What the hell are you not ashamed of it? I get it. No, no dude, you just gotta be like, you just gotta be like, well, I didn't get hard this time, man. What are you gonna do? I'm like, next time, Saturday's another game next Sunday. Yeah, there's 18 games in here.

You don't gotta win every single game. I like that. I'm kinda glad I'm like, yeah, I don't get to have sex. Yeah. Great. Oh, what's that? What a loss. Not meant to be, what are you gonna do?

Yeah, I like that. I like that. Bacon egg and cheese. All right. Well, there you have it, my friend, and there you have it, everyone who listened, that's our episode for this week. Thank you, Jeff, great. Thank you for having me. Very funny stuff.

Go watch the special, go to whitecomedian.com. Please do. Follow me on Instagram, please, for the love of God. Follow them, follow them everywhere, and we'll put his links and shit in the body of everything. And we will see you next time, guys. Bye-bye, thanks. I love it sweet, it's delicious, and I was eating a piece of mango, pre-cut from a beautiful market here. You know how a story has some beautiful fruit markets?

Absolutely. That was my move. I would get a little fruit salad. You know many times I've gotten sucked off being like this actually One time after I was like want to come back with some fruit salad and I thought it was smooth And then some girl after she fucking was like that was so weird. You asked me to come over for a fruit salad I was like, I don't know. I wasn't dry and I didn't I wasn't drinking at the time. Well, they say mangoes are an effort D'siac. Well, here's the thing. Thank you for bringing me back on point. Because I was eating the mango.

And I've oftentimes I've had mango and gotten pussy right afterwards. Yeah. And I was thinking to myself, what if this mango made my dick hard? Ha, ha, ha, ha. You know, I was like, now that would be something else. That'd be awesome. And I am happy to report that there is a new kid in the game. You know I'm a dick pill evangelist, eldest.

You know I'm an ED, I've tried them all from the gas stations to other services. Mango RX now has a new ED pill that is game changing, okay? It tastes like mango, my friend. Delicious, just like it. And they have a nice proprietary, game-changing, okay? Really? Taste like mango, my friend. Wow. Delicious, just like it. And they have a nice proprietary, because like I said, I've tried them all, Eld. They got a new proprietary formula that combines the active ingredients in Seattle and Viagra

with oxytocin known as the love hormone. I've never heard of oxytocin before in my life, but let me tell you this. Made my dick harder than ever. We're talking, zwing! You know when they take out a sword and it goes, zing! Yeah. That's how I felt putting my dick out of the condom.

It was like unsheathing my hardcock. It was pure metal after I had some mango Rx, bro. Shining in the light. Yes, one little gleam. One little gleam when I turn my dick a little bit. Hahaha. Mango Rx tastes good and makes your dick hard like metal folks. You heard it here first.

I don't know. Yeah, because like I said, I've done a bunch of them. And they also have an amino acid that helps increase blood flow. They got all kinds of science shit in here. They're making them taste delicious I am so happy it is it was the goal of this podcast truly we sort of made a podcast to discover and work with the new innovators on the cutting edge of the heart making your dick hard Science in the field right people who have a beautiful goal,

here's their mission, make America hard again, eldest. Then, you know, let's get, can we get, fuck, fucking idiot. There you go, sorry. We tried to give it the applause, it deserved, but some asshole wasn't ready to go. And look, make America hard again. I think, what whatever side of

the aisle you're on, conservative liberal leftist, centrist, we could all use a harder dick. Maybe if we busted more with harder dicks, all this division in the world would go away. I think this is such a good product. I think you might have to change your long standing opinion on on ED medication in general. Eldis, I think you might have to change your long standing opinion on ED medication in general because look, here's the thing about mango orax. You might not need it, but you're going to want it, pal. All right? I know I've spoken about it a lot, but I am excited to try this one.

Yes. A big part of that is the dissolving factor. Quick, works within 10 minutes, my friend. The dissolving factor and the yummy taste do make You've seen you see me take getables that's sure just cuz you wanted a little dummy I have so much wine to get high as I'm saying you take weed adibles I've seen you take fiber Edibles where you're shitting yourself cuz you wanted a momentary a momentary snack

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You and your partner are gonna love it. That goes double for you, LD. I can't wait. I have a big family and they're spread around multiple countries. So a few years ago, it was my brother's wedding and most of them decided to come. Great news, but a big problem.

Where do you put eight people, all with different requirements and keep them all together? We looked at some hotels, but then it was obvious, get an Airbnb. My mom and I were able to find the perfect place. It was a big house with multiple rooms and in a part of the city with woods

and walking trails all around. The Airbnb also included a huge kitchen where we all got together the day after the wedding for a big family meal. This is a cherished memory for my family and me. And whenever I drive by that location, it always makes me smile. Not long ago, my mum and I stopped by that area to walk around and remember one of the most special times for my family, whether you're traveling with friends or with family for a big wedding or justification, get an Airbnb.