Stavvy's World - #50 - Sydnee Washington

Episode Date: November 13, 2023

Sydnee Washington joins the pod to discuss her momentous return to NYC, being a bottle girl in LA, embracing sobriety, riding off the demons, and much more. Sydnee and Stav help callers including a woman whose family mocks her for not drinking, and a man who is undercover-hating on his fat friend who only wants to hook up with dimepieces. Learn to speak a new language with Babbel! Visit https://www.babbel.com/stavvy to get 55% off your subscription. Follow Sydnee Washington on social media: https://www.instagram.com/justsydbw/ https://www.tiktok.com/@justsydbw20 https://twitter.com/Justsydnyc Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice! 

I have a big family and they're spread around multiple countries. So a few years ago it was my brother's wedding and most of them decided to come. Great news, but a big problem. Where do you put eight people all with different requirements and keep them all together? We looked at some hotels but then it was obvious get an Airbnb. My mom and I were able to find the perfect place. It was a big house with multiple rooms and in a part of the city with woods

and walking trails all around. The Airbnb also included a huge kitchen where we all got together the day after the wedding for a big family meal. This is a cherished memory for my family and me. And whenever I drive by that location, it always makes me smile. Not long ago, my mom and I stopped by that area to walk around and remember one of the most special times for my family

Whether you're traveling with friends or with family for a big wedding or justification get an Airbnb Welcome everybody to stobb's world. We have an incredible show for you. One of my favorite comics with my favorite people We're the first friends I've been in New York, Sydney, Washington is on the show today, but it's a very exciting time here at Stavis World. We have the final shows of the Fat Rascal Tour, the final show ever of the Fat Rascal Tour is happening December 1st at the Beacon Theatre.

We sold out two shows already, we added a late show, tickets are almost gone, I want you to be there, come see me do this hour of material for the last time and why is it the last time? Because a couple days later on December 5th, fat rascal, the special is premiering on Netflix, streaming on Netflix, and it'll be out there. I'm very proud of it, we worked really hard on it.

And a lot of interesting stuff, a lot of exciting stuff I want you guys to be aware of. If you're in New York, come see me. If you're not in New York, please watch the special. And if you want to learn a language, download Babel. That's right. If you want to learn it, the easy way. If you want to learn a language, the easy way,

use our friends at Babel that are sponsoring us. They're doing a special limited time deal for our listeners to get you started right now. Get 55% off your Babel subscription, but only for our listeners at babel.com slash stave. That's 55% off at babel.com slash stave. Spelled B-A-B-B-E-L. .com slash stave rules and restrictions apply, but check that out. If you you want to be you'll be speaking a new language in no time Let's play the music Welcome everybody to stop these world 904 800 stuff. We've got one of my favorites Sydney Washington we go all the way back from when I moved to New York we were just talking the pipe we were the

The pie guys you guys really want is with a half hour. We were just talking shit Whoa before before So really good stuff I said man, it's hot. Yeah, you came in hot Came in hot you're kind of spiraling right now. It's awesome. It's good. It's nice because you're spiraling but you're under control. You know, no relapses. I'm sober. That's the only way. Sober.

If you are going to unravel, it has to be on your own terms. That's right. And it has to not include tequila or cocaine or ketamine. No. And I'm doing that. So good for you. I'm on the right path. You would have a great relapse.

Like, I will say that. The first like week would be sick. Mm. It would be the fault, the, the, don't get me wrong. It would ruin your life. Yes, it would be. But that first like three weeks. I don't know, the, you know, I did a relapse.

Oh, I didn't do that. I'm, I've been sober six years. Okay. But before that, I started those two years. Yeah. I relapse, I started those two years. Yeah. I relapsed, I started drinking white wine, doing cocaine, and then riding my bike in 98 degree weather from Bushwick to Harlem.

Who is not good at it? That's why I was. The fact that I did not die is crazy. That's insane. How long was that bike ride? Oh, when I tell you my ass was high. Yes. I mean, I was high. I was high. I was you my ass was high. Yes. I mean, I was

doing bumps. Yeah. Yeah. What were you going to Harlem for? Oh, on cocaine for pussy. No, just for fun. The ride music was good. My speaker was fully charged. That's even that's progress. I mean, I'm glad you're not relapsed, whatever. But to go to get cardio in on cocaine, much better than what you used to be doing. relapsed, whatever. But to get cardio in on cooking, much better than what you used to be doing. Oh no, much better than like, you know. In my mind, I said, if I ride, I'm riding off all of the demons.

Right, that's what it is. This is how dumb I am, makes sense to me. Yeah, you know, like I'm like, Have you done it? Have you done it? You think I should get a good game? You want my real game? I know what payments were of physical

manifested physically in a fat cells. You are too much. Yes, so you were here for years, you went to LA. Now you're back. Ooh, tough. LA took me out, man. I don't know if I was going to make it. Oh, LA is not for anybody who has a soul.

No, no. It's for the soulless and people have purpose. Yeah, you don't have that. You're just going to help. No, no, I'm just a good person. You're a good hang for real. It just so happens to be talented. Yeah.

Yeah. Stream ADHD. Yeah, yeah. Self so happens to be talented. Yeah. Yeah. That's like three Mady HG. Yeah, yeah. So sabotages, you know, class. That's the brag. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's honestly probably lucky you weren't there when you were younger in the middle of your like,

relic, because here I feel like, you know, as far as a hot girl on drugs, being a bottle girl, probably one of the better things you could do. Yeah, it's mass. It's mass. It's actually way more accepted. When I got sober and I'm still bottle waitress and they were like you have to get out. You have to go.

You're fucking up the vibe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the customers don't like it. Yeah, this hedge fund guy cannot, this doesn't have plausible deniability that you might get. You might be on pills enough to suck his dick. So you gotta go.

You got to get out of here. They were like, so you keep telling him like, oh, I know what you're doing. I keep telling him like, oh, I see you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't like that. They don't like that. That's a place for them to buy $600 bottles

of bottles of gray goose and maybe finger and aspiring actress. Maybe, you know. But not back, you know what, where I was at, they wasn't even doing that. Like, I was swear to you, the finance dudes, they are really specific in what they think is fun. It's just like buying a whole bunch of bottles, doing a whole bunch of blow in their blazers. Right. They don't change.

They go from the office to the Right. They don't change. They don't. Yeah. The office. Yes to the clerk the loosen a tie It's like you know wait if you don't take that performance please Burning this place. Okay, so they're they're not look. It's more of a status thing for the other bros Yeah, yeah, I think there's like probably one guy that's like probably getting hose Right, but then everybody else is like Surrounding the guy who's getting host there. I'm like, where's the fun? Right. Does it sound fun to me? No, so what we're that we're break down the different that what type of customer we talk? We got the finance guy We got the finance guy. We have the celebrity who's like, you know, they're

Compte or they're using a card and then claiming that they were robbed. A clash of move. They're cutting off their American trash. You're like, you know, some one to the, you know, scammers. Then it's the people who, like, they really do have money. They don't care. Right.

By whatever. Right. Those people, I respect, because they don't want too much right interesting They're like we know what we're in here for. They don't think that we're trying to you know do the run around Right, no need to scan them. Yeah, like to them. What's there's between five grand and 20 grand nothing? Yeah, oh the men is 20 They walk in there like not much is going on. It's fine Yeah, yeah, yeah bring bring more sparklers this time. We, not much is going on, it's fine. That's fine. Bring more sparklers, it's fine. We'll make it a thing.

And then there's the Saudis, the difference. You can't speak to them. They come in with their people, don't touch them. Really? Oh, there. What's the point? What's the point of even doing that? Maybe because I feel like in Dubai, it's illegal.

Right. Or you can't drink. You can't drink. You can't be around hoes. I don't believe. So when they're coming here, they're like, oh, this is the... I think, I would think the opposite. You're ready to go crazy. They probably are, but behind closed doors.

Right. They can't do it out in the open. I mean, there's cameras and everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I remember, this was the craziest night of my life. I had so many tables that wanted to talk to me. And I just was like, ill, please can you stop? And then the Saudi Prince guy comes in.

He's got all his people or whatever. He's ordering Johnny Walker blue. He's getting Louis the 13th like crazy liquor. The tab is absurd, right? So I'm trying to like talk them up, they'll please don't talk to him. And then I was like, the fuck? Oh, yeah.

You know, I had a silence of black women. And so I'm trying to talk. To them just silence, I don't know, that's a good, like the, that's a great matchup is the misogyny of a Saudi rich guy versus a black woman on drugs. I was on drugs, I was just kinda guessing. I mean, you know what I mean?

I mean, you know what I mean? Black woman on drugs versus Saudi prince. That's the fucking celebrity deathmatch right there. That's a great person. That's a fucking celebrity deathmatch right there that's a great person I keep trying to talk to him his bodyguard or whatever comes and they're like can you just please stop and I'm like I don't understand and then they pull out a wall at a money whoa it's like two thousand dollars and they're like here's two thousand just to stop slowly them alone and, yeah, I don't care about sentiment. Yeah, I'm saying the money.

So Luke, and then all the people who are trying to talk to me, I was like, oh no, you have to stop. It costs 2K to get me to stop talking. Stop talking. Yeah. And to give you an overtimp and everything. So it's like, I guess it doesn't pay to want to work. I don't know.

You got to pick your, or the, I think the moral of the story is be so annoying people stop paying you to stop talking. Yeah, yeah. Well, I think he did understand that like, I really did want, I came in like, let me do my job. They're paying about just like, spin a grip. But they were like, my dress, my chest is out, arms out, all this stuff. So like for him, it was her own.

It was her own. Yeah. It was literally her own. It was literally okay. Your titties were her own. Yeah. In that situation. I'm Mark Simpson.

I don't know what. He might be right, but it's how wrong. And I don't know what. You need to open your, you need to open your horizon. He might be right but it's how wrong. And I don't like it. You need to open your horizons up. I'm a learned man. Let the screen slide me over.

He's like, Titi's were her arms. Slide me over. I beg of it. Look at most cases they're halal. Yeah. But hey, this specific situation, Look at most cases they're halal Specific situation. Well, that's good. We should tour we should tour Dubai. I'm stavros halal kies But we want those fucking white shit I love it. That's that is a that is a hilarious show. How long were you doing that? Ten years ten years and a full decade. Yeah, I did a whole career. Yeah, yeah. I had tenure and bottles.

Yeah. And I think that's where I learn how to be cool. Total. Also make money, be bad decisions, terrible people, make good friends. I will say the best friends I've ever had were people in night life. Even though they don't have no sense of like what the day is or like real issues.

I mean, drugs and alcohol bring people together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so I've had friends that like, yo, their mothers have that, we've come strong out to the funeral, come to freaking Connecticut. Across the eyes. Oh yeah, no fuck.

Oh, there was one funeral we went to, people were definitely doing math. Right, math. Because they get up Across the eyes. Oh yeah, no fuck. Oh, there was one funeral we went to. People were definitely doing math. Right, math. Because they had to get up for the funeral. No, because they had a run. They was like Thursday, Friday, Saturday, the funeral's on Sunday. So they've like, oh, we haven't slept.

So we're gonna do some Tina, just a little crystal. And go to the moms here. And we're walling in the back, but that's because we're coming down. That is true being like with draws. Or kind of the best. There's the vent diagram between with draws and a very person grieving very hard. Yeah, it's really similar.

It's the same. So if you want to seem like you really care about someone. I mean, I did care, but also, you know, I was not doing math that day, but that was no. Yeah, that day was not participating. But it was like, it was crazy that we like, I think sometimes you have to be on drugs

and alcohol to show up anywhere. Oh my God. Because sometimes it's like, what the fuck? What am I doing? I know. Not funerals, but even that. It's just like you, the accountability that people have when they're lit is just stronger than anybody.

Like, any like weekday. What do you mean by that exactly? It's like, they're present. In LA, people have canceled more. Yeah. Have all of the time, they don't want to agree or commit to anything. They just can't be bothered.

Right. And then I've had more people like on drugs in, in droves show up for me in ways that I was like, I can't believe you're here. Yeah. You look a mess. Yeah, you were horrible, but thank you for probably talking to me here. You shouldn't be here. You should be.

Yeah. Well, maybe that's because you had very good,, you just had good drug addicts around you. I did, I did have good drugs. Yeah. And I'm still cool with a lot of them now and they're all obviously not party in the same way. Yeah, that's nice. That's cute.

To make it out of that, because that's the thing, is like there is a high, there are people don't make it, right? Or they don't become functioning, they don't become, like, you know, functioning sober people half the time. But the ones that do- I'ma be honest with you, I know more comedians that have died than people in Nightlife.

Well, I mean, yeah, full. What are we comparing now? Oh, yeah. What do you mean? I mean, yes, of course, comedians. But I just mean, like, anybody on drugs, I mean, comedians and nightlife, doing the same thing. True.

Being fools. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Getting paid for the foolishness. The nightlife people make way better money on average. No, it's true. And it's like, typically, you're probably a hot girl, right? Most of the time. Or a promoter who seems like the worst guy of all time.

Yes. Like if you picked the type of dude you don't want to be, it's a or a promoter who seems like be like the worst guy of all time Like I mean picked like the type of dude you don't want to be it's a nightlife promoter, right? So it's like yeah, I don't know I'd be but I feel like nightlife promoting is honest scams Mm-hmm. It's more honest than anything else people are selling us right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Tommy T's come to my come to my conference You know, I'm gonna teach you how to be a boss yeah yeah yeah the promoter is like hey I Need you hot bitches you're right. I don't even know how to walk right come with me Let me teach you I'll split a rainbow roll with y'all

And then we go we go to PhD and you live the life and you might you might meet your husband It's wholesome pimping, it sounds like. It is wholesome. It's wholesome. You might meet your husband or you might get, you know, proofed. What else? It's still an experience.

It's still an experience. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You weren't going to do that, staying in the house on a fucking Thursday night. No, yeah. You weren't. So we got the UAE Prince guy, we had some, you also, I have to give you credit

because one of my favorite things on the internet that you used to do Was the like the bar the story time with Barbie which you found I have to give you credit You found something that was incredibly work intensive was very entertaining and really was not rewarded by the algorithm whatsoever You made something hilarious and it was just like Stavvy, can you talk to them? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're not gonna listen to my black ass. Well, you were just putting them in a store, to be fair, you were kind of dumb,

you were just putting them in stories. And it's like, those go away after a day, but I always enjoy them. You get engaged with it. Like, people, you know, you know, some people post things and you're like, skips, skips, skips. I would have people, I would have like,

a little more attention. Yeah. They will come back, they'll be like, hey, I'll be like, People post things and you're like skip skip skip skip. I would have people I would read them all Yeah, they will come back. They'll be like hey, I'll be like be our be either like miss. Hey Funny it was funny you would be like I gotta be back They're like I'll be back in like an hour and people would wait. Yes, I would be like oh Some of that was pandemic too. It was nothing going on Oh, no, sometimes I would be like I'm getting in a car, so I have time. Oh, now I met up with someone. I'm gonna see them for a little bit, and then I gotta, and then I'll be talking to them, like,

yo, I gotta find more Barbies. You're like, what? And I'm finding random Barbies in different situations. And then I start getting real visual, the cinema, talking to each other. Sure, it was really good. I was like, what happened back? Are they archived anywhere?

Yes, I put them on my page there, and what do you call that? Yes, the highlights, the Hollywood movies. Sure, it was really good. I was like, what happened? Are they archived anywhere? Yes, I put them on my page there. Okay. What do you call that? Yes, the highlights. Highlights, the highlights. Put them on, make a real high. I've made a couple of reals, and it's been okay. But I do say this, like the algo you have to be consistent,

you have to look a certain way. Sure, sure. You have to abide by the Instagram, you know, unsp You have to abide by the Instagram, you know, unspoken rules to really thrive. But those are just also, those are just good stories in the most classic like, I mean, I'm sure I'm not breaking any news to you,

but like make that a script. The bottle girl signers. Oh yes, yes, you know, we're working on it. That's good. You're like, good, good. We're gonna, yeah, it's gonna get sold. Cause you need a date if you need somebody to play DJ in a track show. Oh, sorry. good. You need to do if you need somebody to play DJ in a track

You know, I'm the guy giving you the rainbow rolls Come on girls look alive Wow So you can have a flashbacks In the sizzle wheel. The demo for the show, because you really didn't know it. Well, give us one more. Give us another good one if a story

from that kind of tie or anybody. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, you know, men come in there and you're like, how do they have power? They don't know what that, well, as soon as they get fucked up,

it's like, we can rob you. Right. Right. This guy, he lived on the upper east side. Very, very wealthy dude. Hell yeah. And he would come in. He'd like himself.

He'd like himself. So those are the perfect ones, because you're like, you just want a friend. Right. You could just pay for an escort, but you want some lights. Sure. You don't want to go to the strip club, because you don't do that. But you're just going to an escort, but you want some lights and you don't want to go

to the strip club because you don't do that. But you're just gonna go to the night club, be a friend to girly, and then you're like, I'm buying this crazy Madusa-sized bottle of crystal. And we're both gonna drink it. Oh, gonna drink it together. And he came in several times and he would get so fucked up and he would pay me a lot.

And what does this guy look like? What are we talking about? Non-descript. If he was in a regular list, I can't tell you who it is. Yes, yes, but the grayish hair, you know, he's gonna get really good suits. He takes care of himself.

Like a guy in the background of a scene and succession. Yes, not the main guy. Not the main guy, but he's like eating fucking sausages to see like he takes care of like a guy in the background of a scene in succession. Yes. Not the main guy. Not the main guy, but he's like eating fucking sausages behind Tom Rags Bogums or whatever the fuck is named. Right, but he's got to have enough money to eat. But he's in the room. He's in the room.

But he's not the main guy. That's okay. Cool, cool, cool. But he came in times in like, you know, he hit me off with money behind bottles. And but he would get so, I have to get in a car with him Wow and drop him off. Holy shit. His place. I would Jeffrey Epstein's mansion Sydney was friends with doing gray hair rich guy nondescript uppery side Sydney was

Don't put them on do not put them on Don't put them on. I do not put them on. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you.

I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you.

I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. I don't know you. here. Take it all away, so great. So anyway, I drop him off. He does doorman. He meets me.

He like, oh, I know what it is. Right, right, right. I'ma get him upstairs. Yeah. So this one time, I think this is actually probably the last time I saw him. He comes in. I think this is like right before, I think this is during Halloween or whatever comes in

He spends like 20k damn Just buy himself god damn and I'm getting the girls we're drinking And this is just drinks this is food here or nothing. Oh, there is a restaurant by Yeah, yeah, you're drinking Yeah, yeah, like only only the real Yeah, the real

Touching me during this bit I don't know why I have to keep making contact with me That's that you're either I have to keep making contact with me. I can't. I can't. I can't, don't touch the fat tree there. So, he's been $20,000. Holy shit. I'm in a, I'm in a, I'm in a, damn, much for you. I'm in a white rabbit, the white rabbit from Allison Wonderland, outfit. Yes. They painted.

Oh, I think you've posted a picture of this. Yes, they painted my face. My nose was black. I'm doing cooking. So I can't get it in my nose as fucking rough. Oh, it's great. White and it's great. A horrible move to get nose paint

when you're doing fucking lines all the way. Yes, and they were like, hey, the customers are saying stuff. I was like, that means the party's bad. That means people are sober. That means the vibes are off. The DJ's not spinning. That means you guys need to do better. If they're noticing stuff like this. They're noticing that I'm clearly doing cocaine. That's on you. By the way, I love that you're talking back. You're just doing drugs. The waitress. The lowest person on the total. No, no, we make that thing go around maybe I see we actually are the puppet masters of everything

We can string together a real good deal if we want to this is great. I love the dynamics here. Yeah, so I'm white rabbit or whatever and he He's by himself and he's about to close out and They're like, oh, I don't know if he came close out. He's done. Yeah. He gets to bill rights $10,000 for a tip.

On top of a tip, all right, there's already a tip including we explain that to him. We get literally everybody from the club to verify, because you got to verify. When there's a big tip, somebody's got to verify then another person got to verify. The buss are got a verify. Yeah, when there's a big tip somebody got a verified then another person got a verify the bus Or got a verify the big sense the bathroom attend Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah not doing that. Yeah, yeah. He literally, he's like, I know, I know, I know. Yeah.

He's like, we're like, whoo bitch. Like this is crazy on top of our, and this is like Halloween, we can whatever. So like we already, I have a flight at 8 a.m. to go to Miami. So I'm done with it. We, I drop him off, I come back to the club, we celebrate and we feel good.

Everybody's getting naked and everything is in cash. Yeah. So we pay and everybody out, we like, this is crazy. Yeah, all this cat. I got to fly, I got to go to Miami. Yeah. So I have the cash with me.

I don't go to the bank. I have this cash to go to Miami. Of course, love. I got this money, so I'm like, I'm going to really, we're going to, um, What are you doing in Miami exactly? Well, my friend, boyfriend, who I didn't know was a drug dealer until he went to jail.

I had no clue. Yeah, bitch, you got y'all to just be guess-matching. He's a Colombian. Yeah, I didn't know. I didn't know he was a- Polaris. I didn't want to assume, of course. But he might have been Venezuela, actually. I didn't know he was a hilarious. I didn't want to assume of course, but he might have been Venezuela next year.

I don't know. It's fine. Anyway, yeah. So we get there. And but I have all this much. So I'm buying and stuff. We go into strip club. I'm spending this money by the second or third day,

my manager calls me. He's like, manager of the bar. Of the bar. Of the bar. Refracts. He's like, so we got a problem. Oh no. I said, what's the problem?

Hey man, I'm out in the sea. What was that? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm shaking ass right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What's the problem? He's like, yeah, you know that God, you know your regular, you know when they say regular, they try to put it on you.

Of course. When y'all this whole, Oh, your guy, this whole block verified to check. They said, he said, he said, he didn't mean to give $10,000. He said he will pay for for obviously the $20,000 of stuff he bought. But he would have like, there's a tip included, right?

Yes, he'll do that, but he's not the ex-NOTINK. And I said, no. He said, well, whatever you say, when you come back, have that money ready. Wow. He said everybody in the club has to give their money back. Well, that's crazy. Everybody's got to give their money back in his career.

Because it was a lot of fun. How are you even going to retrieve $10,000 that you gave to like... Well, we split it. We split it amongst each other. Right, let's say what, 14 people? Oh, my money was gone baby. Yeah, of course. My money was gone. Yeah, it was a Tutsi.

Go out like Palmer John Wings. I said, don't let simply bitch. I was like, put extra platinum in. Like, poor, poor, he doesn't see on top of it. I was like, that money lasted three days. Oh, I was clowning. Because I was like, that's awesome. What's up?

We're living laughing. Yeah. We're living it up. Why must I follow the rules? Yes, yes, yes. So we had to give the money back. It was, and I was was like I got to work overtime Yeah, because I the the bussers. I feel bad because it's not like my money sure. I'm gonna make it back then

No, that's a fucking that tip. Yeah Come on, he's got a family. Him and his nine kids are in a one bedroom. Do it for Ali. No, no, but we got the money, but that's how it works. It's crazy. And I got never came back, huh? No, bitch, because for me, he blocked. Of course.

He blocked. If he comes in, I'm making a call. Somebody waiting outside for me. And we know he got the money. Yeah, that's absolutely right. For me, he blocked. Of course. He blocked. If he comes in, I'm making a call, somebody waiting outside for me. Yeah. And we know he got the money. Yeah, that's absolutely. We know he got the money.

And these guys just wanted to be friends. No, he wasn't trying to fuck, or he was, but he was too timid. He never asked, he never asked. He's just like, you know, if you know me, sober, I'm literally a really good time, but when I used to party, my phone would be buzzing. Literally, everyone would text, where are you at?

What you doing? What you're doing? What's up? I have never felt that much love. It might have been higher. It really is what you would call that. Something. Wow, something from a really stable family, if I had to guess.

If that's what love was, you're like, wow. When I tell you my birthday, my birthday, I will have 400 text messages from any and everybody I'm talking about. We, we're off as our bathroom attendants. Hell yeah. I was a really good time I could see it a New York staple and so yeah, I could see this guy being like I want to be her friend. Yeah, but

Yeah, I learned a lot working there and then now I'm reformed Yeah, yeah, you know, you know, you wouldn't have a chance to turn it around Turn it around you can be you can be dick free for what going on how long now? Oh Did we have a relapse No, I won't tip you 10k Yeah, don't worry about it. Honey. Wow, okay, we'll make mistakes. That's because of you know about me, I'm gonna take that to you.

And he's not getting it. Off the show, I've been robbed. You know, you don't even have to do that. American Express, you're right. You'rety, American Express, you call them, you tell them, no, no, no, no, they take it off. American Express, fun little scam guys. Whenever American Express would come in, they'd be like, yo, we honestly don't even want to take their car.

We rather a discover card over, right? Because they would just take it, oh, interesting. That's why some places don't take American yeah well some finance dudes I even I had a boyfriend who would use his business card and then he bought a bottle of wine in the next tablet I don't know where my card is open greenhouse I don't know what crazy move yeah oh yeah and American best customers almost always right. Yeah, yeah nice We got to get some MXs eldest we do we got no you should have one I should get one that's crazy

You're doing so well. Yeah, I've never thought about doing a minor credit card scam though, but maybe Well, you just American is best is good for like the points and okay, you know Yeah, I don't know shit playing and stuff I am on the plane that is true I'm on the plane and the back of the come on I'm in the front of the plane so it's just like you get these cards you get all these perks and stuff I mean you and the the sky lounge and we're in the lounge we're eating those fucking weird little meat balls they got

good I can't wait I I want that for me. It's not that good. It's not that good? Not worth it. Not worth it. No. I don't know. You're away from...

Here's where I'll give you. The bathrooms are worth it. You know what I mean? Oh, you have to look at the shower. You have to look at the shower and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's not an airport.

It doesn't feel like a junior high bathroom, which is what most airports feel like. I mean, it's all just about luxury. So... Yes. It's a little, it's definitely a little better, but it airports feel like. I mean, it's always just about luxury. So, you know. It's a little, it's definitely a little better, but it's not like, I mean, you know, I don't know what the fuck I was expecting, because it is funny when you have no money, and then you get some, you're like, this is gonna be,

I'm gonna, me and the queen of England will be in the same fucking place, you know what I mean? I'm Walt, and then I'll say for myself, that's what was going on when I was making that kind of a thing is though, I had no sense of like what, how much I was mean, because I, I rarely put it in the bank. I would have cash underneath the mattress in different shoe boxes. I would have a little bit of money in the bank so they don't know.

Right, right. Ciao, we gonna have to believe stuff out. Yeah. Yeah. The government already on the show. Yeah. The IRS didn't have to know about every tip. Every tip from a lonely man on the street. I mean, they're not telling us.

There you go. Flip it on it. Flip it on them. Okay. Yeah, we're so our fucking cash dollars going. I see the streets, say fucking. You give us universal healthcare Maybe the money's coming out of the fucking Luba-ton box

Maybe I'm putting it in a fucking bank account to get taxed Fuck yeah, yeah, I just love the idea that you were also just in my just for you really we're just trying to have a good time Always do you think and and cuz it's like it does it does strike me the amount of like I just love the idea that you were also just in my, you really were just trying to have a good time. Always. So you think, and because it's like, it does strike me the amount of like, just platonic good times you were having, even as like a drug addict, which is like, I wonder, I don't know,

do you think part of that is like, that you were gay and you didn't know it, and you were like, not really fucking girls, so you were like, ah, I'm not really trying to fuck these guys, but I don't know, is there something to do with that? No, I was hooking up, okay, let's get this right. I was hooking up with men, just not, men with money,

or what the hell is that? What the fuck in good guy? You were fucking bombs, oh yeah. Yeah. Cause then they know that I'm with them for this. Oh my God. You know that I'm with them for them. Oh my god. I do I like Yeah, I have learned as like an older Latia who's wise yeah, yeah people have sex or

Whatever date people in their class. It's all like socio economic the people usually day people who are in yeah true They're circle, financially, socially, how they're raised. So even though I was making this money and I'm hanging out with those rich dudes, I didn't see it. Interesting. I didn't want it. But like, guys who are more around the way or come from broken homes.

You just didn't respect yourself enough honestly. I wouldn't say I didn't respect, I wouldn't say I didn't, I wouldn't say. Come on. Come on, some of these guys. No, well, some of these guys were also just like, I mean, I'm not saying that those rich guys all were, they're definitely trash. They're not true.

But you meet one that's nice and he happens to be rich. There's nothing wrong with that. They're not fun. Yeah, you're probably not. They're not fun. And that's what I think men fail to realize. They're like, if I get all these things and do all this stuff, this will make me cool.

It will not. You're still that guy. You're still at the core of it, Elizabeth. You're a tech billionaire, you're still the dork that couldn't really talk to women. Yes, yes. I get that. And the guys, I don't know who your clientele is,

but I feel like they have a little something, you know. What do you mean, my? You're like, the people who follow you. Yes. I don't know if they're millionaire billionaires. No, they're definitely not. But they definitely haven't. Good, it's smoked.

We got a wide swath on Stavis world. We got the whole team on here. Exactly, they have the possibility of. We're Rainbow Coalition. Ha ha ha ha. Rainbow Coalition of Windbretters. Ha ha ha ha. This is a rainbow coalition. Rainbow coalition of windbreakers. This is a track suit. It's a track suit.

Thank you very much. It's not a windbreaker. I would be pretty cold if I went outside right now. Doesn't protect much from the elements. It's more a style piece. It's a style piece. It's a stosh on. Stosh on.

You're right. A dapper dan. No, but you know what, I shouldn't show you, because that actually, I do actually respect that, because that's, that there is something cool about that of being like, you know, I have access to all this stuff,

but yeah, these people, I don't see them, you know, there's nothing, there's nothing like, truly redeemable from them, and you're just kind of like, you're at work. You know what I mean? And I think that's why I was able to last as long as I did.

Why didn't get sweaped up and someone fucking saved me because I was too busy like being grounded. Yeah, it's nice, yeah. Yeah, no, I like the cool people. Right, right, right. And what you learn, being as interesting the coolest people They might they're probably not the most successful. No, not like the most People are sociopaths. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. It's the same way like politicians anyone who wants to be president

It's a bad person. Why would you? Sociopaths? Why would you want things to be in control of everything? Why and you're not even really in control You're just the face. It's really, yeah, yeah. It's a Supreme Court. No, I don't get it. There we go. I definitely feel it where I'm like, I don't wanna fucking, like the last couple years have been so busy with shit.

And I'm just like, this isn't what I did comedy for. I didn't do comedy to have a job. And it's like, it sucks. It's become a real job. I mean, don't get me wrong. Thanks for everybody and everything.'re we're taking time off the road next year but Stavis Road we love doing actually because we get to just do

whenever the fun we want traveling and doing like being on the road is really hard on your body yeah yeah and you know you haven't you have it you have it mastered Hollywood yet no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no But I don't want to do, I mean, I would like to act a little bit, but that's the other thing is like, but you're good, you would go in and you would be you and that's what the camera loves. No, I want to act a little bit, but I also have just seen what like, just getting a little taste of like,

like I'm not at the upper levels at all, but just like kind of, I've at least been able to kind of like peek in through the window with that shit and I'm like, ah upper levels at all, but just like, kind of, I've at least been able to kind of like peek in through the window with that shit, and I'm like, ah, that life is kind of brutal. Like, I kind of just want it. Like, I just, I got to place it in Baltimore. I wanted to buy a place here,

but even when you're fucking doing great, you need to be like a Saudi prince to buy a place here. It's wild. It's fucking insane, but I just like. I was, when I was, wait for a thing, I was able to get a apartment in in Harlem brownstone Backyard basement washer dryer a big-ass walking closet small kitchen But everything else cuz they're like you know cooking

Cooking your own crack. Yeah, exactly artisan homemade crack You're in your own crack? Yeah, exactly. Artisan homemade crack? $1900. Wow. 19, you'll never get that again. No, that's over. That's in, I think when my landlord had bought the building,

it was like, beautiful price. Totally. That's not happening. No, no, shit, here is, like, it's insane. The amount of money is like, you're like, that can't happen. Like, no one has that money. Yeah.

And we're realizing every day on TikTok, they don't have that money. No. Like, no one has that money. Yeah. And we're realizing every day on TikTok, they don't have that money. No. No, no, no. Everything is smoking here. No, everything is about the collapse any day now. Oh, yeah.

Every day. You know, subscribe to the Patreon folks. So. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I will say this, you are providing a service. Sure. And you're providing entertainment that you're not

getting on TV, right? Because this is unfiltered. And it's curated in a way that of your mind. Of course, people I like, I like hanging out with. Yeah, people I like. So I think that is worth paying. It's a similar, it's a lower level version of the bottle girl experience.

You know what I mean? It's like friendship. You know what I mean? It's like a type of friendship. You know what I mean? Not hot and people aren't trying, well not everybody. Most people aren't trying to fuck me, but you know that's the thing with like you're not your guess. No, I'm talking about, yeah people listening, people watching. That it's like it's similar to like the most successful things are people kind of selling or just like creating an atmosphere of like intimacy of some kind, right?

This is more of just like, fucking around with your friends, than like a rich guy who's so lonely, he just wants to be surrounded by hot girls who smile at him. But you know, there's something too, just, just being, and I actually feel like, through what we do,

especially we've been doing these live calling shows that are really fun, you get to actually interact with people. I did that. I did that. You're an OG, you're an OG, Stavvy, so is your problem. Yeah, it was fun. They were very nice comments.

Yes, yes. She's hot, I wish we were fun. Yeah. I love black women. Yeah. Yeah. Cool. Yeah.

Yeah. So you were on a very early version of the show. Yes, but I do think that what you're doing is sometimes cooler than what's curated on a network or whatever. Oh, definitely. And then you do realize. Everybody gets to find shit that they actually like. Yes.

And a lot of times people are doing stuff. They don't even have any real fucking say. Their name is on there, but they don't. Somebody, it's 20 other fucking white dudes with bad hairlines already been like. Wait me another. No. Did you just mean?

Yeah. What do you mean other? I think you just meant 20 white dudes with bad hairlines. I have a beautiful sick mane of hair. Hey. Yes. But I've learned through bottle h-sync and you don't want to be too rich and you don't want to be too cool because it is so sad.

Socks. And that's what that's what I don't know if you feel this way about trying to figure out the next phase of just being a fucking person of just like figuring out your lab. I mean, I know you're going through it right now. You're in the middle of the fucking... Oh my God! We haven't, you know, the break, you break going through a breakup.

Yeah, I started break up in July, and then I came back here. I gave up a lot of stuff to tell you. To tell you what, it was a big relationship. And from afar, I mean, you know, we're friends, but it wasn't like, it wasn't like, you know, we were talking every day. I was like, pardon me, it's like, oh nice. She's giving it a real go, you know, I mean, we're friends, but it wasn't like, it wasn't like, we were talking every day. I was like, pardon me, it's like, oh nice.

She's giving it a real go, you know what I mean? And maybe we'll never see Sid again. Maybe Sid's gone. And the crazy thing is I would be on shows like, yeah, knew your fuck out, yo, just see. Like, you're gonna have to be better than y'all. I gotta fucking balcony, not fucking that. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then I got there and I was like, wow, none of that matters. Because New York, you could be in the nitty gritty, not have a lot of space. It can be very chaotic, but there's a sense of like community and a sense of self and people are creative. And you just, I work well under these circumstances. In LA, you have to be really strategic. I think you like a little chaos. I do like chaos LA, you have to be really strategic. I think you like a little chaos.

I do like chaos, but you have to be really strategic there and you have to be able to use people. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to be like, this is my network. Yeah. I'm calling, I'm making a call. What you're doing? What you're doing for me?

I'm not meeting up unless we, what are we doing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We just being in your front door. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know? Absolutely. There's just being in your phone all week. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. There's very little hanging for fun over there. You just gotta drive 40 minutes to meet anywhere. And I get it, because it's like,

if I went over there 40 minutes and one, the vibes are not good, so I'm not sucking me on. Yeah, the food is bad. What are we doing? I'm with you. Yeah. So what's your grand return been like, where you, what's the, what what you got a balcony that again?

Are you still live it you usually live in a whole lit. You used to live like barely in New York Oh my god, thanks for coming. What did take you two hours to get me? Oh, actually only 35 minutes ago because you also live very far And we're not that far relax relax Yeah, yeah, yeah, your neighborhood versus my neighborhood. I think you know I think you story And since we're like a we're an old man. Yeah, we got some. I like hearing old Greek people yell at each other.

What can I say? It makes me feel like home. But yeah, before I left, I had like a sex lady dungeon den where it's just like a whole bunch of euphoria lights and you guys are like, I'm having a lot of fun. You were big on the euphoria lights. Yeah, a lot of paint teams, but just like, you know, two bedroom, two cats.

I was like living in it, I felt good. Like you just hot lesbian. I was giving lesbian's a good name for themselves. And then I move back, I'm living with my really, like one of my best friends and her husband and her two cats. Oh hell yeah. And it feels like it's a TV show, because every day I'm like, man, I gotta get my life together.

I gotta get it together. It's like, and then I'm like, are they having sex? Yeah. Am I in the way? Well, they have sex. Oh, man, she cooked that dinner last night, and I was like, what do I need to get my own place?

Yeah, great. It's great. And I'm like, yeah. But yeah, I came back and honestly, I've never heard so many people be like, in my own place. Yeah. Right. You know, you know, you live. Yeah. But yeah, I came back and honestly, I've never heard so many people be like, Sydney, New York is complete. Now you're back. Like, something was something missing when you were gone.

Yeah. Comedy is. I didn't feel that way. I thought it was fine. Oh, wow. You aren't even here. You're on space. You're on space.

You're in space. You're in like 30 minutes. You're on the fuck up. No, you're right. You're right. No. I'm thrilled. You're in space doing like in 30 minutes. You're a shit the fuck up. No, you're right, you're right. No, I'm thrilled you're back. Yeah, it's been fun. Everybody's been hanging out. I've been like, I've been getting into it.

I've been doing anything dumb. Making some errors. Oh, if it's dumb, capital D, I'm into it. I love it. Yeah, I'm like, you know, I feel like, damn, I'm gonna be 40, not next year or the year after that. I don't know when I'm gonna be like. Real soon, eventually.

And I'm like, yo, why does everything have to be perfect? Why does everything, why do you feel like you have to have your life together? What is your life together? And I met so many people who lives are together and it's like, but you're not happy. So what are we doing? So I'm really just trying to live life and figure it out.

And I'm putting less restrictions on myself, which makes me... Now we're talking, yeah, a couple relapses, but not the drug con. No, not all of the... No, not all of the... Yeah, let me back into that. But we'll say this, I'll say this on. Oh, no. I'm sorry. You're not pulling me back into that. But I will say this.

I'll say this on cam. Please do. You know, for me, for some reason, it's just hard for me to meet women. They will not talk to me if they do. They want to be my friend. Or maybe they are attracted to me, but there's something about my energy that they're like

I don't know if they're intimidating. Maybe they're intimidating because I am funny and yeah Yeah, I talk shit on stage, but if you know like On stage off stage, but once you see me like once you look at me directly and I go like oh Totally she used to be ugly so like yeah, yeah, yeah, she's a sweet girl. Totally. She used to be ugly. So like, she's good at inside. Oh, she used to be ugly. We haven't even gotten to the fact you were a child who set your house on fire. I did set my house on fire when I was 11.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, you know, I come from some chaos. Yeah, I'm so sure. If you really get down to it, you're like, oh no, she's mad, cool. Definitely. But maybe some people are like, she's too good for me. I can't do it.

Oh, that's interesting. And that's why men love me. I love the men. They're like, they should not be with me. Oh, of course. So that's why they keep, they keep butter. Not something better than a girl that's so much better than you.

Oh, they just won't stop. I love dragging them down to my level. They won't stop. Come on down, girls. And they leave me alone. And so now I'm like, I'm definitely, I'm not bisexual, but I'm like I will entertain Yeah, damn you all foolish. You hear that girls. I'll go on a day This is how this is how much you're fucking up

This city's even considering fucking guys again Come on, let's get some hot lesbians in here. Yeah, let's get my friends sit Let's get some hot lesbians in here. Yeah, let's get my friends sit and chat. Something. And I've been in two back-to-back serious relationships, right? And they were amazing, like really amazing women. I would not take back anything, but I'm also like, damn, I keep getting in relationships

so I'm not really dating and I don't know how to date. It does feel like lesbian dating is, every lesbian I know is like, oh yeah, I went on one date and really liked her and we were married for eight years. Like that's every single, like every close, every lesbian in my life has that story, at least three times in her life. She's ended up in like a crazy, whereas like, I mean, gay guys, it's the hilarious polar opposite.

Where it's like, oh, hello, nice to meet you. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye. They're just like each other. And then they shake hands, and they're like, well, see you at tennis next week. With the screen, with the screen. Oh, like, I'm off on this one. This one, take the screen up, El, that she knows it's true.

No, you're only makes sense if you are a gay man saying that you're gay. And I'm a man with eyes With gay friends Straight man is trying to say Spuing this hatred. I'm not spewing anything It is against my man. I'm making cogent observations About the human condition You're not wrapping me in your body. By the way, you're I'm making cogent observations about the human condition.

You're not wrapping me in your bag. By the way, you're a, you're a, you're a, I'm a big victory. I'm not knowing. It's a boom up. Oh my, he does. They all like hate days and blacks. By the way, I'm a big fan.

Those, I'm saying you guys got something to learn from gay guys. You need to go that wild. You know, they don't need to be any push eating glory holes. But you can do a little more hooking up as all I'm saying. I don't know. I don't, hooking up is so intimate. It's so intimate and it's like, especially if you're a lesbian,

because it's like, I really do feel like it's about connection and like, energy and some of the hottest girls, you're like, I don't know how we're gonna do this, because you're just, we're too looking on the're gonna do this because you're just we're too Looking on the outside and we want to look good. Yeah, sure It's so easy to get banged out by a dude cuz you're like the lighting on be bad Dirty they what do they care? They don't mind like they didn't put lotion on for four days

But like girls you like you want to make things right? You want to caress you want to make sure they feel good You like did you eat like what? Right right right right you just want to have things in order Mm-hmm, and you also want to like I think you can I think there's people who could hook up with men and not like be obsessed But a woman. I don't know. I might have to really have strong feelings to just like make out I can't just make out. Really? You see a hot girl, you know, like, I could just fuck a one time and never see her again. No, because my girls, my girlfriends are good looking.

So it's not like I'm not used to attractive women. Sure. So that's nothing for me. So it's like, okay, what's next? And then on top of that, my best is Marie. Hottest, funniest, coolest girl. Marie's the best. And so it's like, funniest, coolest girl. And Marie's the best. And so it's like, I'm not sure.

I don't want to be with her. So it's like, some hot bitch comes in, you ain't got no jokes. Yeah, I'm not really in. I'm not. But she's bringing something else to the table. What? You want the fucking them, that she also wants the fuck you.

You know what I mean? No, I don't. I just, I feel, maybe it's because I'm older and I've been in some of these relationships where it's just like, this is not all that, it's so good, it's so good, but it's like, it's just the glaze. So then what are you looking for then?

That sounds like, because what you're talking about is you're literally queuing yourself up for another relationship. Like you just said you wanna date. I know, that's why I say my mind, I don't know how to turn it to the like, yo, just have a good time. Just go on a date, just chill.

And then you know, these, you go online and these fucking idiots are projecting their bad dates and their stupid information on everybody. And so that's the go to like, we can't do this. We can do that. Oh, you giving it up? Oh, you whore. Like, yeah, yeah, I can't do this, we can do that. Oh, you giving it up? Oh, you whore. Like, yeah, yeah, I'm a whore.

We're a pro whore, but I can't share. Let's get the body count up. Don't even talk to me if it's not 15 and above. I don't even, don't even, don't hit my DMs. Go suck a couple of people off and let's get the 15. That's what I'm saying. I don't, I feel like don't be a ho with men, but like maybe a ho with women?

Well, not maybe not all men, but. There's just so many venereal diseases coming out. Well, you're usually sleeping out of that. You're already so young. Listen, be a ho with women too. That's awesome too. I'm a big fan of that. I just, you know what?

I want to, I want nice, I want like cool dates. Yeah. You know, I just have to be expensive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I like a good time because I know what, I want nice, I want cool dates, it just have to be expensive, but it's a good time because I know what I'm bringing to that. You're gonna have, I'm gonna have good stories, you're not gonna have a trauma dump, I'm gonna look good. And there is plenty of trauma folks,

you should just not do it. I just look a little bit like, if you wanna hear it, you ain't gotta hear from across the table. You gonna be in a car. It's gonna be a car ride for three hours, and you're gonna get it good. Yes, absolutely.

Yeah, come back, we'll have so much more. We gotta get you and Marie together on here for sure. Oh, we first of all, we'll take over. Remember when you did our part? It was so good. It was so fun. It was just like, I think you were the body positivity expert. And this was before Lizzo, a Dale.

It was before the very first. I was. I was. For the body, expert. And this was before Lizzo, back in the day. A Dell, it was before the very first I was. I was. For the body, bitch. I really, I was naked before my career was going well. You know, you really? I was just a fat guy, new to the internet. You walk so Lizzo can shame other fat bitches.

That's what you did. You're doing great work, Tom. Thank you, thank you. That was a great pod. That was so long ago. And it was so long ago. And it was so long ago. And that, because I was with you guys, I was not a storyteller at all on like my, in

my act at all. And I just had a very fucking weird threesome. And because I told it on the podcast, I was like, let me try this on stage. And that became the bit that I did to end my special. It was so good. Yeah. That was so fun. I would say, Of course, who black women giving the alieu? Alieu. It was not no one better. No one better. You guys are the best. We were asking really good questions. Yes, yes.

Given it to and it was. No, you're the best. I was like, Tom is good. I was like, oh, as first when you were talking about sex, I was like, how? And then when you started talking, and after the interview, I said, I get it. Yeah, I get it. Thank you. Thank you for that resigned acceptance that I get pussy.

Uh. Uh. Well, something about the food choice that you were getting before, the three of them. I think you had like egg rolls. Yeah, I was fucked up. Oh, it was bad.

I was like an egg roll for three. I was fucked up. It was bad. It was bad. An egg roll before three. I was spiraling. You were an ass. I was spiraling. I was an ass. I didn't think I was, I mean, this is all,

you've all been covered. I didn't think I was gonna fuck them. I thought it was like a weird bring your friend, because it's the internet, I'm just some guy. So I was like, I just thought they were bringing a friend to make sure I'm not a lunatic the one time you were not Delusional

I Was You don't think you're gonna get fucked you're gonna get fucked. It's true. It's a weird. It's a weird That is actually that's happened to me plenty of times. Yeah, I think you're kind of a loof too. I can be about it Like because you're just like yeah, it doesn't definitely now. I don't even kind of a loof too. I can't be mean. About it. Like, because you're just like, Yeah, it doesn't definitely now. I don't even give a fuck. There have been times when I'm like,

I guess we can have sex. See? See? But now you understand me as a lesbian. Oh, interesting. It's like, you've done, I've done it. I've done it, especially as a lesbian. Well, there's an element of depression to it too though.

Yeah, there's a big element of depression. That'll will lay it on thick. You know, Sydney, I think people would respect you more if you knew another language. There's a lot of pressure to it too though. Yeah, that will layer. That will layer it on thick. You know Sidney, I think people would respect you more if you knew another language. Yeah, you should download Babel. Did you know that one in five Americans, listen to this said, what do you call a person who speaks three languages,

trilingual? Someone who speaks two, bilingual. Someone who speaks one, American. That's right. Only 22% of Americans speak a language other than English at home. Start learning a new language this fall and be the exception, not the rule. You know, me and Eldis, we're already bilingual, but we're trying to be trilingual with Babel, because with Babel you start speaking a new language in just three weeks. Instead of paying hundreds of dollars for a private tutor or fooling yourself with language apps that are little more than games, Babel's quick 10-minute lessons are designed by over

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What can I say? You know what I mean? People have that on their bucket list. They want people want to learn you language for multiple reasons. I've said it before. I'll say it again. I'm looking for a Latina, a Latina mommy in my life. So I'm trying to get my, I'm trying to get my Spanish in there.

I'm still very basic, okay? I've had to repeat certain things. I have a, I'm very sleep, but even for my sleep deprived, drug-addled mind, these lessons flow right by. They remind you in the morning, I love that. I start my day with it It's easy to pick up you know, I've thrown a little Spanish in there. It has it gone over great, you know

I've gotten a smile when I said then now that one time Lady smiled at me because I said it, you know She said thank you for a tip. I just I just like no problem No problem. That's how the fuck we get down around here I'm I, I got to get my confidence up. I got to keep the lessons going, but I love it. It's so nice. And here's what I really like. You don't want to be one of those assholes that just reads the, you just read it. You don't know how to speak it. Literally, the micro, you repeat one of the parts of the lessons that I love the most is you repeat what you just said and they they critique your pronunciation. Babbles speech recognition technology helps you to improve your pronunciation and accent because I I drift a little to Greek with it sometimes. I think just

because I speak a different language all of it and I do think Spanish, Spanish with a Greek American accent is better than just an American accent, but still I want to be kept honest and that's why, you know, I just have, I have the, I say, you know, even if it's a, if, you know, thank you, gracias, you know, do I overdo it sometimes? Sure, but I love that element of it. It's the best. And here, there's a special offer for our listeners here at Stavvy's World.

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You ready? And if you think you think you're gonna download Babel, just continue the conversations if I hadn't said anything. Where's the point? Where's the point? Damn, I'm dry. You can't even cry on it. It's still dry.

Yeah. It's I'm dry. You can't even cry on it. It's still dry. Yeah. It's fucking so obvious. I was like, I will rather just be sad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. No, I get it. Well, yeah, you're gonna have to come back with. We haven't even gotten into all the trauma dumping you don't do on dates. Oh my god. There's so much to get into. But now we should, let's do some calls. let's solve some problems you know you will yes you do for sure

hey stop halva's been handed a show i'm here it's been handed a show hey stop halva's been handed a show uh... i basically hear the issue. So I quit getting drunk and using drugs in the middle of 2019. And basically it was just like ruining my five years. So I had to quit. And I'm not like a card turning alcohol is an honest person

or anything. Like I still have a blossom wine on a special occasion or drink a beer like once a month or something. And all my friends are like really supportive. I'm not friends with any real party boys or party girls. And my handsome Greek boyfriend is really supportive as well. He doesn't really just try and we don't keep alcohol in the house. The main issue is my family. Ever in my family loves to get wasted just like all the time. And for whatever reason, they're always trying to get me to have a

dream when I hang out with them and they take it really personally if we go out to lunch or dinner and I just order like ordered a diet coke that's fucking insane and i don't have to be around them that much but recently i was visiting with them for like five days and it just like it ruined the whole fucking vibe that that's crazy that's crazy that i wasn't drinking and they were like making fun of me for not getting

to be for myself and it was the most interesting thing about it a lot of people are talking about. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay.

I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay.

I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not crazy. That is literally crazy. Your family is behaving like, like, frat boys, like, this is behavior that you do, like this is how I acted when I was 19

and a friend was like, no, I'm not drinking that. I'm like, pussy, fuck you dude. And we try and like, you know, water board him with fucking pop off vodka. That's fucking crazy for your family to be like, why aren't you drinking? Actually, it's not crazy, because sometimes I feel like your biggest haters, for this is family.

And they put it under the guise of like, we're families, so they think like what they're doing is cute and funny and like, you know, we just fucking around and it's like, nah, I'm really taking a serious hit. You're affecting me and you're fucked up and you probably have problems and you're projecting and you's like, nah, I'm really taking this serious. It's, you're affecting me and you're fucked up and you probably have problems and you're projecting

and you're like, it's a layered thing and because we put so much on the title of family, we give them the sleigh way, we like put up with it, it's toxic and it's different because it's like, you're supposed to feel safe and you're not. And so, one, how much money they got? How much money your family had? Because I feel like this is a broke ass family.

You'd be like, I'm out of here. Yeah. They got money. They got money. They got a dentist drinkin' in MacAllen, 25. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You fuckin' done bitch.

And they're like, yeah, you won't get the trust fun and all this stuff. I think I gotta keep coming in. I guess if there's a if there's a down payment in it for you, maybe you know, in a groan every once in a while ain't the worst thing in the world. That's sure. I didn't think of that. But the it feels more like broke behavior to me, but it's possible that they have money and they're just judgy, you know, cons. I would say though, I mean, you're absolutely correct about to like sometimes your biggest haters are like, you know, like what's it saying? Like a profit has to leave worries from or whatever the village is from.

It's like, because no one, no one read it. Huh? No, I'm not going to take that. I heard it somewhere. I'm reading a little bit, but not, you know, I'm not going to take that. I heard it somewhere. I'm reading a little bit, but not, you know, that didn't come from a book. It's basically like, yeah, I think you have to, what I always say with shit like this is like, these people probably aren't going to react positively to a boundary.

But you, I think you owe it kind of to yourself to give them the opportunity to like clearly step over the boundary. So you, because that way they can't even be like, well, you never told us this. You have to kind of lay it out for them like, hey, drinking too much was ruining my life. I really don't want to drink every day. I'm, I'm sober I really don't want to drink every day. I'm sober, unless it's like a wedding toast or something, I'm not drinking. And plea, it really, I feel like all this peer pressure is really negatively affecting me

and it could lead to really bad things for me. And if they don't accept that, then I do think, once they go over that boundary, I think what you do is just, yeah, limit the time you see them. You're in and out, you're in, you go to holidays, whatever, definitely don't spend five. I like my family not only spend five days with them. That's fucking crazy. Five days at that, you're not on a trip. You're five days at the house. Come on, no pool. You're asking for it. You're

asking for the trouble. That's too much time if you don't have a great relationship with your family. And so, yeah, trying set the boundary, they will probably trample it. At least you've given them the opportunity not to fail you. Yeah. And then when they do, just, you know, yeah, I think you're right.

Unfortunately, you got to, especially, I said, he said, if this is a broke family, get the hell out of there. And I will say, there's been different times, I'm like, I have a pretty good relationship with them pretty much everyone my family. And then even people that I don't, I feel like maybe we're kind of rebuilding it here, whatever. But there are times where I wasn't around my family

where they were like, you know, I was working through my own shit, they needed to work through their own shit. I've gone to therapy, most of my family is gone to therapy. And there's times right, and see my, you know, my mom or dad for a really long time, I didn't see my brothers.

And I think all this shit also kind of shifts and changes. This might just be temporary, right? Like, they might need you to fucking go away so they can do some reflection of like, wait, what the fuck did we do that drove her away from us? And it's like it might not happen it might not happen anything what they did yeah, they probably do know but I think like all this stuff It's not final. It's not set in stone But for now you as a person and then who knows maybe she can in the future if she feels like she has better control over her drinking

This kind of pure pressure won't even affect her as much right? This is true. I don't possibility. That's a possibility. That's like somebody who's going on six years like, I don't really, I know what it does. I know what it can do. I have fun with the people while they're getting fucked up and I just see like, damn, they're going to be having a tear when they come on. I don't have to do it. You know, I wake up feeling hungover just with the weight of the world. So like, I just know sleep. I can tell you don't sleep that much.

So you can be around people who are drinking or whatever. But I think the biggest thing for this is that, like, I forgot who said this. I ain't afraid to cut a bitch off, whatever lyric that is. You gotta let people know. I don't know. cut a bitch off whatever lyric that is you gotta let people know I don't you've been reading to And that's the thing when you meet people who are very like oh, I don't have to deal with this you Respect them more. Yeah, respect their boundaries But if you think you could get over on somebody you're like I'm not listening to them. I don't care

So I think moving forward with sobriety, you got to let people know. And I think they do that in a a or whatever. Like you, you, you're like, I will cut ties because this is about me. Don't make it about don't say they drink too much or they don't say like, it's like you guys are alcoholics. Like for me, I can't be around this because this affects me and just put it on you. And then be like, and if this ain't for y'all, then I'll see you when I see you. We don't have to be around each other like that.

Totally, totally. And I think that is, and it's tough because family pushes all your buttons, has all the guilt shit, all that stuff, but I think at least if they go over that boundary, at least until you feel comfortable being around that kind of drinking, you kind of have to, you kind of have to like go your separate ways. They got to stop with the family's got to stop.

I don't know what they're going through, but they have to get a grip. I agree with you. I'll just play another one for us, pal. You know, style of eldest and guess, I'm calling, I just called a minute ago, but I'm trying to kind of edit my talking points for just sounds more quick. It is easy to let us know that. So I bought this Gist for my now ex-girlfriend. She broke up with me.

And it is a leash and a collar. I know how you feel about my kind of people but that's fine with me. I think you're hilarious. I know you're judging me bitch. I knew what I was gonna do before her specifically for her and it doesn't have her name on it or anything but. Do I as her specifically for her and it doesn't ever name on it or anything but does it specifically for her? Because she broke up with me, I feel like it has no owner now. Oh, you're sitting on my next partner, but it also holds like a little bit of a reminder of her in it.

And so I'm just trying to figure out like should I try to like resell it or like something? I don't know. It was never used. Yeah. For sale, one collar and lease, never used. We're going to do that. And you'll enjoy calling me a fucking freak or whatever. But hey, come on, man. We're open here. Yeah. It's like, you know what you're you're talking about. Like, no, we're not gonna drag you. Come on, dude. I'm gonna drag you for this is giving also broke energy. If just buy another one, buy another one for your next girl. Yeah. Or give it to somebody else and they don't have to know.

Absolutely. Well, I get this though, right? This is, it's funny that it's a leash in a collar, but we've all been here, you know? Like you break up with somebody, it's like, oh, that was their pillow. I can't bring, I have to, that pillow's gotta go in storage for a year because I'm sad or whatever. You know what I mean?

You know what I'm saying? It was the pillow. But I just mean like, that you just like, or whatever it is, there's just like some, there's a reminder of the person. Yeah. And even though she never used it yeah first of all just the the answer is if this is still emotional for you give it away it's just really funny to be like a friend yeah I just I'm sorry guys I'm a little emotional I just saw the the cage my wife x wife used to put my penis in when I was misbehaving. Fuck. Yeah, yeah, oh, I just caught a whiff of the Gimp mask.

I wore the first night she pegged me and I'm gonna need a second here, guys. Well, you know what it is for me, right, as a lesbian? Yes. When you break a... Oh, wow. The dick. The dick's gotta go. The dick's gotta go.

Wow. You don't use the dick on you They're constantly buying new Dicks because that's that's nasty totally and but you know men don't have to worry They use the same nasty ass Yeah You go to store I mean those backpack lesbians But like you go to store, I mean, those backpack lesbians, they're putting them in my knee, my knee. My ex bought a, there was about $500.

Wow. It took two months to get. But here's the thing, now I don't want to hear, I don't want to hear a sob story. No, no, no, no. Because I have my talking points on this issue as well, but go ahead and finish. I was like, yo, I feel like you should be able to use that

on someone. Yeah, I'm a lot of money. You should be able to do like a new color, like put a painted with some non-toxic paint. Oh, this is what they covered. They covered, like Fortnite skins. You should be able to have, you should have that's a genius idea.

Shorter, shorter! You hear a shark dance. You should be able to have, you should have that thing. Genius idea. Shortcake. Shortcake. You hear a shortcake. Come on Mark. That's so good. I love that. Yeah, I think that's a great idea. But here's the thing, listen, it costs a lot of money.

Here's the nice thing. Never have to worry about getting hard. You get to buy huge penis if you want. Me on the other hand, sure, I don't have to spend, like, you 500 bucks every time I fucking you girl, but I got a deal with the penis nature, gave me, and it ain't the best. You're right.

So there's trade-offs, you know? I'm sorry. That's okay. Thank you. Thank you for reaching across the aisle. Just to touch you to let you know, I understand. I start breaking down, I start fucking crying. Thank you.

Yeah, you're right. The strap-on should disappear like Star Wars, when Obi-Wan Kenobi is struck down. No. Like a force goes, once you break up and just disintegrates into the winds With these covers you know how they're on the toilet you know how the toilet When they have that new plastic when the new butt sits down. Yes, that's what they need you need that Absolutely, I think so I think so and then listen you're also gaining It's not much and maybe a millimeter of extra girth, but over time, you fucking up women,

that's another way to make your big living. It's like, and then when you're done, when you retired from getting pussy, you cut it like a tree, and you count the rings, every time you got pussy, this is a great idea. You're sick, and I hope you use that someday. That's good, you make you listen to content

at tear bad, and I'll take you with you. I asked you to that someday. That's good. You make you listen to content to your band and I'll take you with you. I asked you to do this somewhere else. Like that. Okay, so there you go. Look, pal, it really comes down to you. If it's, there's no problem in using it on somebody else, but it sounds like you wanna give this away,

give this to one of your freaky friends, and buy you new. It's just a listen of power, though. Like it's not even, oh no, it's not like, you want to give this away, give this to one of your freaky friends, and buy a new one. It's just a listen of power though. Like it's not even, oh no, it's not like, it's not like a cock ring. He picked it out just for her though. Or maybe your favorite color.

Like the thing that you, like what's that, the stuff that an anal thing. An anal block, butt plug. A anal bee, or something like. It's, I feel like, isn't a, the fact that you're like, there's no name on it. He picked it out for her though, you know. It's a gift for her.

She might have really. I'll be thinking about gifts too much. Well, yeah, I mean, this, yeah, I don't know. I mean, look, I just, I get it. I know what he's talking about. He's just raw from the breakup. It's really worth it. Yeah, that's what it's about.

And it reminds him of her. And the last thing he wants to do is he's putting on his saw voice and being like, you look at that, you fucking bitch. Well, he's fucking some girl in all leather. And then he catches a glimpse of the fucking pink collar, furry collar. And it reminds him of his ex, and he starts crying.

No one wants to DOM. No one wants to dom going soft because he's remembering his ex girlfriend. That's kind of what I'm saying. You're right. So I say, give it away by paying you and don't be a broke village. Burn it.

Burn whatever you need to do. And just think of it as like that's part of the cost of doing business of a breakup. Don't give it to a friend because then you'll do randomly like you're like, you're using it? Yeah. Yeah, that's part of the cost of doing business of a breakup. Don't give it to a friend, cause then you'll do randomly, like you're like, you're using it? Yeah, yeah, that's true. Can I be there?

Yeah, yeah, exactly. You don't want to keep that. You don't want to think of it in a sexual context at all. And there's no real goodwill for sex toys. You don't want that. There's no good sex toys. You do not want to shot, that's certain things you don't want second hand.

You don't want it. second-ass for that matter. All right Eldis. Hi, so I raised very Christian and sexually repressed like think Brian DiPolmas Carey. Oh nice. And so growing up I had that definitely had an effect on my ability to have relationships and a second life. I've mostly stuck with relationships with women because men are too demanding. But I am now 26 years old and I really want to get this down. Oh, she wants to get this down.

But I don't want a relationship. So, what I want to buy from is, how do I approach a man? He is trustworthy and understanding that it might take me time. Oh, you are amazing. But I basically just want to fuck him. And I don't need anything else. I feel like men might be open to that, but at the same time, the trust factor is really important for me,

because it's always been hard for me to let down barriers and relax with somebody and be myself, especially actually. Thank you very much for your needs, Vic. Interesting. So she's basically once a friend with benefits essentially. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. What's your advice for somebody searching for something like that, Sydney? With a man specifically. You can't figure it out with a lesbian. We've already covered that.

But what about what about? If you want that with a man, you just have to not one man. They will come. Yeah, they will come when you don't want them. And this girl's kind of like the bizzaro version of you. Yes, the version of you. Yeah.

And then I think to be honest, if you are honest with him, it could be done. Because I think it's actually better to be a straight shooter when it's about the dick. Because then they gonna do you like you wanna get done. The problem is, is that you have to remember, you wanted this. So when they start acting, like they act in like, oh, this is just dick, you can't be getting

on and on and on. But with YouTube, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah catching feelings, right? Like very rare, like if she, if she's hot and she lets him fuck whenever and it's like, yeah, he can think. He's like, yeah, this is awesome and I am literally speaking from experience here where plenty of, you know, I've like had casual like, you know, basically friends with benefits where it's like, and most of the time, great. We know what it is. I don't give a fuck, but then like every once in a while you're like, whoa, I actually time, great. We know what it is, I don't give a fuck, but then like every once in a while,

you're like, whoa, actually, you break, you know, it stops, you're like, wait, I liked her. You? You know, it's happened to me. Really? A couple of times. Well, I mean, one time that I can really think of, they kind of fucked me up.

There's feelings in that, buddy. There's feelings. Feeling. Feeling. Very deep. Feeling. You gotta feel it. It can happen as all I'm saying. He's got a feeling. It can happen as all I'm saying.

But, I also, it is nice. I agree with you where it's just like, yeah, if a hot girl was like, hey, would you be interested in hanging out and every once in a while and fucking, like once, you know, a couple times a month? And I'd be like, yes, that would be awesome. You know, it's that, it really is It really is that simple, which is kind of sad

that it is that easy, but yeah, it really is that easy. You could be so honest, there is less gains if you don't have no emotions involved, but when you are like once like a relationship, now that's when we really got to put the cards on the table and we got to just shit around and you got to really figure out how you gonna Trap this guy If it's just sex yeah, there. Yeah, it's gonna be so simple and she says but I don't want a relationship And I wonder what that's about maybe you'll figure it out maybe for right now

She doesn't want to relate to you, she just wants the dick, but she wants to be with women. She's been with women, because that's the other thing. There's a couple of things here that's a little strange. Well, she's twin. Men are too demanding.

She's 26. It's an interesting thing. It's an interesting thesis. I don't know that that's, like, you're response that was like women are also demanding. Women are also demanding like it sounds like Maybe she's having like cute little early 20s friends who go down on each other kind of relationships You know what I mean? Yeah, you don't you don't know what you really want until it's like

There's nothing but lights everywhere and you're seeing it like yeah, you know like I Remember when I used to like make out with girls at the club, I'm like, the lights, like, it is so dark. It feels so like, but I knew that I really liked women when like, the blinds are open. Yeah. Yeah. This fucking sun is hitting your, I'm like, no, I'm beyond, no, I'm beyond, yeah, I'm it's all you generating looking I'm looking at the down the barrel of a Gucci and he is kind of damn not it's not glistening yeah yeah yeah yeah just what I like

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah that's what I knew I was like in the all-layed bear yeah before you yes and my heart is like flattering my fillet looking into a pussy like it's a before you. Yes. And my heart is like, Fluttering. Fluttering. I feel it. Looking into a pussy, like it's a kaleidoscope. I can't.

One eye close. I can't. Bro, having heart palpitations. Oh my God. So, I look, yeah, she's 26, you're right. She's figuring her shit out basically. But if this way you're looking for, it's a pretty easy thing. It is. literally and if you want to feel safe or whatever

Maybe just pick a front like you know pick a friend or something or somebody you feel comfortable with You know they pick a pick a complete stranger Because if you go with or if you do a friend you're gonna get a feeling for your friend Yeah, that's a good feeling. So you know them. You're gonna get that comfortable You ever like there's somebody after they nut and you like order some food and watch a movie like one of the best One of the best times there are the one Other feels better empty knots wings on the way The one, your just meant come. The other feels better empty nuts,

wings on the way. No! Oh, wait! There's a little pint of bed in Jerry's. I love wings on the way, yeah. Shabloochies, baby. Yeah, from me. Yeah.

That's all on me. Damn, stop, he'll tear you. I know, it's great, it's the best. So I get that, I mean, but my only, my point about the friend here though is, I just also want to caution our friend here. These never really end well. This is a, this is a thing that has a definite shelf life.

Someone will catch feelings or both of you will just kind of fade away, right? Yeah, so that's why you get on an app. You do the app thing, you do the beat, pop, pop, you do it like three times and then you, you're like, ah, I think I did what I need. I hope you get everything that you need in three rounds. Yeah. Now you can get the three rounds in one night,

or you can space out the round. Sure. But three rounds. Three in one night, what are we talking about? Let's not get crazy. Let's not set on realistic standards here, you know. You can't do rounds? Three is, you know, the third one's real.

It's like the little engine that could by the third round. It's like, we'll get there, but it'll be like, I'll be hoffing and puffing the whole way. Well, I thought you'd be hoffing. I'm not gonna get one off. I'm not gonna get one off no-ops and puffs. You know, like you have a three for a walkoff, so actually you do have a door in the back of my head.

No, it is so pathetic. Like the times I've been fucking recently afterwards. I'm just like It's right Honestly, we have to be more nicer to each other It's like a lot of us is not working out a lot. We run enough to train Run enough to our ubers and that's the only cardio or Sex is a lie. It's why I said COVID so I'm already I'm good. Don't worry. He's been we have COVID When was two weeks ago three weeks ago? One more weeks ago. Yeah, still doing this yo COVID you fucking whack it sucks. It's embarrassing. We've had enough

You know what you need to do you wiped out the people that you need to wipe out. A lot of cool restaurants close. We want to move on. We want to stop. New York will never be the same. But yeah, no, so that first one after COVID, whoo boy was I barely like I was just and there's no way to be cool. No, just so out of breath. Not regular out of breath. Just like, you can't, you're like, I need a second here. I don't know, but if she's signing up with you, she know what it is. That is true. She know what it is. If you know what I'm talking about her breath. If you know what I'm talking about her breath.

She's like, what did we just do here? Can we play patty cake with some help? That is true. You deaf, if you, yeah, if you fuck a fat guy and he's not out of breath, you know, it wasn't a good time. Would you call yourself fat or? Come on. Out of shape.

Come on. Now you're being nice. How are we going to half into the pot? You're like, wow, would you even consider yourself fat? I remember the couple ones from earlier. Whoa. Whoa, whoa brother. Come down. Well, now she's gaslighting me, Elvis.

But yeah, you're just gonna have to, yeah, go on a couple. If you want to be patient, whatever, that's fine. And then you find someone and you kind of... We don't know where she lives, but I just gonna have to, yeah, go on a couple, if you wanna be patient, whatever, that's fine. And then you find someone and you kinda, I know where she lives, but I just wanna say, it don't matter with stators, where you at? Yeah. They didn't even bat right now. It's bad.

It's fully bad. People are coming out. They don't know what they want. They don't know what they're bringing to the table. All they know is that they wanna be out. And they are running away from so many things. So they come into your date and they shake you eye. And then you're like, oh, I think I'll have sex with this person who's sweating

profeously and just unraveling. Over the street. And poor, but I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it's better to be like, you know, just come over. Yeah. We delight. All the lights are going to to be like, you know, just come over. Yeah. We delight. All the lights are gonna be off, just so you know.

Maybe one light. I might have an incent, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Or half a candle. Yes. Bring the shit, get whatever you need, and pound it out and you're leaving. Well, yeah, I mean, honestly, I have had,

you're basically describing most of my dating in the last and the last, like, just because I've been, I've been fucking gone, but it's like, you know, You're basically describing most of my dating and the rest in the last like Just years I've been I've been fucking gone, but it's like you know someone comes over We show them a nice time obviously what's a nice time? I think we had this exact conversation that we're on Stavis algebra problems three years ago But you know maybe cook a grill up a little something maybe make a cocktail Movie you know I got the projector out there. It's a nice experience. I would love to be a Flaher.

I love to be a roach on the wall. Watching you put together a date now for gathering. I love it. I love to see the craft singles you put on top of it. How dare you. We're doing better than craft singles. It's all good stuff Come on bitch it's proshoot oh Imported you fucking bitch accusing me of getting lunch but now lunchables

Put now launchables Rants You got them big in the blanket uh... uh... uh... uh... can be this money uh... uh...

uh... uh... uh... uh... i got of friend that I don't know how to say it he's just a that he's a ship. Okay, but he goes in a lot of ways. Still wants to bang ten like nine. Is this you calling about me with a voice disguised. He's not getting like 9s all the time, but he's not getting the idea that maybe he has

to go through a few 5 and 6s before he gets a confidence for a nine or a ten. I don't know how to tell him, but he has to lower standards a little bit or lose some weight before he gets into a fucking and you know, N-plus, so anything you can tell me or tell my friend, that would be great. Thanks, love you buddy. Right. Can I start off, please? So you can't even, you can't even deliver a fucking note. And you are dragging your friend for being a fat piece of shit. Who wants 9s and 10s?

The nerve You're a bad friend Yes To Hey As as a person who knows 9s and 10s They probably will fuck him Absolutely

So what do you mean like oh he's just his standards are just too high He knows as a man the chances of him getting a nine or 10, while she's down bad. Yeah. That's some fucking, you know, McCoy's bar. Yeah. Yeah. Blastered on pickle backs.

The chances are pretty damn high. Absolutely. So, what do we know about this friend? Yeah, what you need to explain why he's a fat piece of shit. Is he a fat piece of shit? Because he's fat? Well, then you're fat phobic. Thank you.

That's what you are. Go off. Because your big friend is living his big ass life. And he's like, yeah, give me the tens. Yeah, why not? She's for the moon. And it's not for you to tell him he can't get the knives. He go know when the phone is dry right when the bitches are ghosting him

She can barely eat by her tits are hanging her tits are on the table Okay, you take it up. Yeah, you know, he'll know. So who the hell are you? If anything, you're his friend. You're supposed to gas that motherfucker up. Gas marks fat ass up. You know, yeah, these holes are done. They will be that you're king.

You're king. You're king. Yes, you can see your dick. Thank you. Yes. They're going to love you. You're perfect. That's what your job is. Yes. I can't stand a Fucking undercover hater ass friend. That's exactly right. No, this is because what is it to you?

Are you mad? You're mad that he believes in himself? Probably that's your undercover hater is absolutely correct about this. That's the vibe of this entire call. Because he didn't say he wants to bang 9s and 10s and it's been years and he hasn't gotten pushed. He's just said, this guy wants to do this. How am I gonna tell him, he can't. Has he, have you even tried, like you said, have you ever even tried to help him?

You're supposed to be his fucking friend. If it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen, and then he fucking goes back to the drawing board. But if he's just a fat, let me just, like, I improve positive of a fat guy. Kid-fuck-haw girls. Like, it's dealing, and by the way, yeah, I'm successful in shit now,

but I was a fat guy getting pussy in Baltimore. Yeah, I was, I, when I first got to New York. Yeah, sure. With my own, you can work in high. Yeah, I was the eye doctor I said city the fucking optometry Getting close you no tooth she saw it And it was alarming and then that made me be like I have no face in these bitches

Yeah, of course he's gonna believe in himself and he's gonna follow through and that's fine. But the problem is, this is what it could be, right? Sometimes it's one of those friends, it's like I need my group to aesthetically be to look. And so you're here with your gut hanging out, you don't know how to dress, but you feeling good about yourself, I'm not talking about you. Sure, sure, sure. And you're like, you're looking bad, you're't know how to dress, but you feel good about yourself. I'm not talking about you. Sure, sure.

And you're like, I don't, you're looking bad. You're not good for the room. You're not good for the table. And you might be getting 9s and 10s, but it's affecting my 9s and 10s. You're not good for the 10s. Or the type of 9s and 10s that want you, I don't want those type of girls.

So maybe he's more like, you're not really making this a look for what I'm trying to do Yeah, and that means this person might not be your friend like that. You don't care about them Right, if your your friend is your friend. Hey, some of your friends don't dress right already. They got a smell or Lengthover you're inviting them to the party right right right right. man you can let me say something you can tell my friend his shoes is late over no He's going through a tough time. Oh he's been going through it that time. Yeah. Yeah. He's missing a tooth You can make it. Yeah, you can make it you can make a joke. He'll laugh at it. Absolutely, well here's the, yeah, there's a lot to unpack here where it's like, what kind of guy is he, right?

Because if it, like you said earlier, if he's just, if it's just the fact that he's fat, then you, yeah, this is not, you are being fat phobic, like, but if he is, he's overweight, he is depressed, he doesn't dress, like he's got a lot of stuff that he could fix, that's a different thing, but dude, every group, first of all, the classic, a fat guy in the press, he doesn't dress like, he's got a lot of stuff that he could fix, that's a different thing, but dude, every group, first of all, the classic, a fat guy in the crew,

is one of the best guys you can have in the crew. He's so fun. He's a fun guy, and again, there is the archetype of, is he that guy, is he a fat guy that dresses well, believes himself, all this stuff? Now, if you're calling in, because he said before he gets the confidence of a nine or a 10, and he's like, I don't know how to, you know, he's worried about his

friend's confidence. Is he worried about his friend's confidence? It's possible, right? Like he might have, he might just have very bad messaging here, but he can barely speak. So exactly. So we've, we've covered the like, Hey, man, if this guy has a shit figured out and he's, he doesn't, he doesn't lack for confidence, he's got the rest of his shit together, he's got, you know, he dresses okay, he's fun to be around, he's a fun guy, he can get, there's a path to him getting 9's intense, then you are a hater and you need to fix your shit, right?

You're the problem. Now, he said he's a fat piece of shit. Right. So what we're having a problem with, we need to get down to the bottom of where yes besides the fat part he's a piece of shit. Why is he is he hitting women is he cheating on him? Is he giving them gone or real like what is he bad to be around what is making he's got to be either he's bad to be around But you would have said that you would have said he's always around he he don't bring nothing to the table

You would have you would have said that you didn't say that so what it feels like is that he's He is cool people like him and his fat ass once nines and tens and it's bothering you and you're mad because you fuck six Is that that that is kind of the vibe I'm getting to you are boiling your edges are gone? There is a lot of fucking upset. You're like, there's a little of that going on here. How dare every. How, yes, how dare this guy who I, in my head, value less than me, want things more than I think I deserve.

Yes, that's kind of what this feels like, right? Yeah. So I would say, if we're spot on there, you need to fix your heart. You're a fucking hater. It's you. Now, if we happen to be wrong, you need to fix your heart. You're a fucking hater. It's you. It's you now if we happen to be wrong I don't think we are pardon pardon if we have to be wrong. We could be we could absolutely not have to hit the nail on the head Exactly. So then if we happen to be wrong then let's go back to what we said earlier We had earlier where it's like if he's overweight and he has a lot of shit wrong with them that he could fix like you know

That you know, could dress a little better, is a little depressed, whatever, then it's like, it's the advice I would give everyone, which is like, yes, confidence is super key. And I don't know that I would go with, fuck, uglier women first. I would go with fixes confidence.

Yeah, I would say that. I would say like, I would say like, yeah, get, and, you know, I don't even say this is something that he has to lose weight, I would say like, yeah, get, and you know, I don't even say this as somebody that he has to lose weight, but it's like, get him in the gym, because it feels better when you work out a little bit. You start feeling a little better, right? You get a little stronger.

Let's take a walk. When I was on tour this whole time, I worked out all the time just because it made me feel better. I knew I wasn't gonna be able to stay as healthy as I wanted to, but I was like, I'm still hitting the gym because the endorphins, I also was getting stronger even though I was getting fat. It was just a little something, right? And then yeah, fixes, you know, get a nice outfit,

get him a nice pussy getting shirt. You know what I mean? Fat guys, the classics, it's track suit season, all right? If you're too excelling up, it's just got some cute, like, little sweater. It's a situation,. All right, if you're a two ex-selling up. A-so's got some cute light little sweaters. A few situations, but not good patterns. Be cozy. Your fall is a great time to be a factor.

It is. You're layered up. So some bitches might not have heat in their apartment. And we don't, you know what I mean? Hasn't an even curly, we ain't got it. We got tons of confidence. Get him a cute, you know he. Get it, you know how much pussy I got in a cardigan in the fall?

Quite a bit. Yeah. So just a little cardigan. Get him a couple outfits. Help him. You know, let him start doing stuff to believe in himself. And that's his path. But.

And also for you, look inward. If we, if we diagnosed you accurately, you got to get the hate out of your heart. You maybe you need to start believing in yourself as much as your tubby friend does. How is your king? Yes, thank you. Talk your shit. It felt good to get that off. Yeah.

I'll still a couple more, El, this we don't want to keep our friend here forever, you know, we could do him forever. I mean, literally, we just have the best of times. And before, I mean, we should all say if you want anything to plug, people to follow you anywhere, all that kind of good stuff. Yeah, you heard Stovey, you know, the algo just doesn't, doesn't do me right at times. Shrucked up. Considering how like just, just pure,

you really should be. Shrubbing, uncut comedy is going on here. But yeah, just follow me, follow me, and tell the host, follow me too. What is it just said just said to be w on Instagram J us T.S. Y.D BW and then I have tic-tac but like I'm I don't know how to like master this Tic-tac thing. It's just like they're like higher someone to do it and I'm like Oh, that's not how I do my stuff. It's a lot of I mean luckily

Thank God that just putting fucking crowd work clips is all I do because I could never actually like, what's up, you know what I mean, do that kind of shit? Do bands, you are. Do you're good at it. I'm okay, I'd have been so a lot of work. It's a deal, you're so great. It is a lot of work.

I would rather just... Not moving around, huh? I'd rather just stand, no, that's fine. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm not sure if it's a line. What? Change in positions. It's not that much moving around. All things considered. Certainly it's an amount I can handle, but yeah, it's just fucking boring and too much to do. I'm tired of learning new things. That's really what it comes down to.

It's like, it's just when you're like, we get it now. We got it. I'm good at this. I've, by accident, become good at podcast. I'm good at stand up. Just by accident, good at podcast. I'm good at stand up. Just by accident, I've been podcasting for almost 10 years now. You've been great.

But I don't want, I don't need to learn you. So whatever the next thing is, can you imagine that? Because there's gonna be something new. And that- I won't be here. Yeah, I'm gonna be in a nudge. Hopefully you're running a nice bed and breakfast with your lesbian wife.

Hopefully you're running a nice bed and breakfast with your lesbian wife. I'll be in another universe. I will, I will be that little bug that's on the wall. Why don't you put your love in a sauce dish. You fry them up, cut them in half, put a little... Oh yeah. I was in the middle. Yeah, I'm sending her little subliminal messages.

Get ready for a night of Vienna sausage. Oh, play a so fucking call. I hope you're both having a great day and if you have a guest on I hope you are similarly also having a great day. My question is, what do you recommend for daily coping mechanisms during a hard situation. For context, I am a 29-year-old lesbian with a homophobic mom, and I no longer speak to her. That was the correct choice for my situation, but the daily reality still sucks,

and I'm, of course, struggling. I do enjoy drugs. I take dabs every day and I'm not against doing much, but I also haven't done those 2015, so that might be a bit of a dicey choice. What do you do when times are tough emotionally? I'm in therapy, so don't worry, but I'm still curious what you think. Thank you and everybody stay safe and take care. Bye-bye. Mmm. Tough stuff. Did you, your family hella feel back?

Absolutely. Yeah, I'm fine. You wanna, you wanna try them? You're a fairer child, maybe you have a solid gay without my hand. You ain't shit. The more you're gonna burn it, the more you're gonna burn it. You're gonna better share it. You're gonna die.

You're gonna die alone. I'm saying, actually I'm gay. I'm gonna die burn a sh**? You gonna die. You gonna die alone. And it's like, actually, I'm gay. I'm gonna die with a whole bunch of people around here. You know, if they pull up. They will, yeah. They're all good time. Damn, how do you cope?

Well, me, I'm sober, so it's, I think it's even harder to cope, but I will say that you have to relinquish that because sometimes I feel like we blame ourselves for not even if they're not homophobic, just like if your parents are not vibing with you right or you didn't make them proud or something like that, we go to us. It's like it's my fault, it's my fault, but I always say they had the power, they made a person, they decided to do this and The person you made is not gonna do everything that you want them to do and you have to be okay with that So now you're putting that on me. No, no, no, no, no

Right, so I released myself after I was like hey my mom has so many years of like Shit that I don't have nothing to do with me How she's treating me, it's not my fault. Yes. Yeah. And so that is, I think that is most of the strain is not blaming yourself. So once you take that off and like really move, you'll be able to not have to rely on you know, dabs or mushrooms.

I heard that everybody's micro-dosing right now. Yeah, mushrooms or butter. I heard that everybody's micro-dosing right now. Mushrooms are bad. Mushrooms, everybody's micro-dosing mushrooms. I wish I could, you know, just micro-dose coke, but I've heard it's not possible. No, no, you'll be macro-dosing. Yeah, very soon after that. Never overdose some, never overdose some of coke game, baby.

I was a pro. You were on the bike. You were either sweating it out. Yeah, but you're in therapy. That's good. Do you need meds? I'm not a psychiatrist. We don't know that.

We don't know that. But I mean, being around people who make you feel good, listening to good podcasts. Yeah, I mean, that's the hard thing here is that like, what's really difficult is that this is just the thing that is gonna be brutal for most of your life. There's no way around it. This is the kind of thing that like, it's like, you know, it's like kind of a hole in who you are that you have to like,

that things will grow around it. You know what I mean? Like you'll fill it with, you'll fill it to a certain extent with love from other people, with other things, other things you're, but like having to cut a parent off, a child should never be in that position. And I think that's the other thing

that's kind of helping here is like, when you're feeling down about it, understanding that you're feeling right, you know what I mean? Like you're not in the, it's not only don't blame yourself for this, but also know that like being sad is part of it, right? But, and it gets easier, right?

The longer, the longer you've made your life away from this person, the longer you understand they're not good for you, whatever. Your life is gonna be better when you're not dealing with that toxicity and like trying to make them feel okay with the decision you've made for your life. Yes, absolutely. That will get, over time that just will get better

and just understanding that like that's all this is. This is like a, it's like the time heals all wounds thing. This is a big wound, right? You're having a parent that does not support you, is fucking brutal, it's like fundamental to our like, our psychology and it's like, and so that's gonna be tough. The good news is a lot of people deal with this, right? You, there are people who understand your situation

and there's people you can find in your life that can take parts of that relationship, right? No one is ever gonna replace a good biological parent, like a lot of us that are fucked up are gonna be, you're gonna be missing that a little bit, but there's definitely mentor, there's people in your life that you find as mentors, there's just friends that fill in,

fill in those gaps here and there. You know, I don't know if I would take dabs every day. I was somebody, I was with you, right? I don't want a judge because, you know, I've had a similar situation. Yeah, I've just smoked in weed. It's just a lot, it's just like very strong mass. Okay, yeah, yeah.

Like hash, basically it's like hash wax, basically. I don't know what that is. Yeah, yeah. Just very, very strong. No, no, hash is just like super, it's like weed concentrate basically. And it's tough because I don't want to judge you either because I'm like, well, that's not good for you,

but then I think about, I was in a similar situation, probably at this point, what, five, six years ago. And that does, not that I think about it, that does coincide with the couple years of our lives where we were high as shit every day and eating up to two pints of ice cream a day. It was fucked up in here. You were having an issue with your parents?

Yeah, I had an issue with my dad. And so it was just like, and when I was fresh off that. Did you all fix it? We're kind of, we're in a weird way getting there. Okay, let's go. There's been some progress. You have to be, oh that's another thing. You have to be open to like whatever solutions there is

unless like they're just, they're not working with you. And that's the thing, it's like, I would say this is kind of like a double-edged sword because for me, you know, it was more complicated than home of a home of a home of a parent in some ways, it's more devastating obviously because on some level they'll never accept you.

But on the other level it's like, well I don't even have to hold out hope that it might get fixed. You know what I mean? You're like, no, this person's gone. I'm not expecting anything from them. And for me, I did have to get to a point where I was like I just assume you know I assume we'll never fix it right and so I'll just live my life that way and

You know after a certain point That kind of gets easy there would definitely there's definitely sad moments But you're like fucking I'm and there's also a pride that builds up over time when you do figure your shit out without that. We're like, I figured it out, man, I didn't fucking do. And then I would see my friends who didn't really like their parents have to go to these fucking bullshit father's days. And I'm like, I ain't got to worry about that.

I'm chilling on father's. I'm getting the fuck, I'm getting a charcoot rebord out. I'm getting my dick sucked on father's head. I'm not going to a barber. I'm not having to go play golf and Ben you know giving my dad a tie or whatever the fuck or just a terminal that you have to do because they're just putting up with this like This thing that is never ending and it's not gonna get better. I mean I And this is crazy because my cut off my mom and it wasn't just a homophobic, it was just like she narcissists, just super like you're

going down a rabbit hole of like I'm a trauma dump, blaming blah blah blah. And so we stop talking and then every time I would be like okay I'm gonna try to give her a chance, she'll find a way to fuck it up, she'll lie and be like I'm I'm terminally ill and it's like we're waiting on you to die Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, My mom got sick and I had to go my brother like gave me to business. He's like you need to go see your mother like that I like I think this is it like this is for you to do and I first I was like I'm gonna do it and I went to the hospital and I saw and like she didn't know how to say sorry, but like she basically right kind of I like saw like sorry whatever and then you let that go and she passed and you know I see what my brother and my sister and my neat people who are just like kept like

kept doing this and I'm like I'm free from that and I can literally be like damn. I wish we had a better relationship But I'm happy with the decision. I mean, I can't I can't have that in my life because the way I'm living That was not gonna make sense. I was gonna be constantly trying to make my mom be in my life Yeah, and when she's already tapped out right right you guys fuck Yeah, you ain't no keyiki Palmer That's what she says Wow, that's what you hope I began a hater. Yeah Yeah, and no, no, just respect the Kiki Palmer. She said Kiki Palmer that was the pit of me Making it Kiki and I said well Kiki was a little, she's just kids here. So I'm a little bit. She's got a sprinkle.

Yeah. And so that's, I mean, that's really, so you're just, if this is new, just understand that it's just gonna be difficult. And then like, I would say, I hate to be this guy, I hate to be like the, the guy who used to do, who used to get fucked up every day.

And I'll still do mushrooms from time to time, but it's like, you don't have to do it now, but you should just get, you got to get off the habs. You don't want to do them every day. I've been there. There's something nice about being in a fugue state, like only being useful, like three hours a day and then retiring your brain for the rest of the day. I've been there. I get that, but I do think the goal has to be,

it's so, it sucks because everything you've ever heard about health is true, it's just like, you feel better when you're not on drugs, you feel better when you eat well, you feel better when you exercise. And so, Damn, stop, you talking. It sucks.

It sucks that it's that simple. See, I get them draws when you're talking like that. It sucks. Yeah, like. It sucks that it's that simple. So, I mean some provolone. Yeah.

Or it's right here. I got a baby bell for you. I got a... Oh my God. Oh my God. So, yeah, you're in there, but you're doing everything you need to do. And if this is kind of kind of like close to what happened,

the dabs and the thing is like, it's understandable and do what you need to do to kind of get through a tough time. But know that the like, your guiding light should be, I can get through this stuff without. And you can. And you definitely can.

You literally can. Both of the people you're talking to right now have gone through this and have been like, have been fine. And so that's really it. I mean, it's going to be difficult. I would say do what you need to do in the short term and then slowly try and replace. I mean, for me, a lot of it was my career. I just, I really dove head first the last couple years, you know, and it's like, and the next thing I want to do is focus on my health after. Money will help.

You know, yeah, money has helped. I will say that, but it's just like, I would say find healthier things to help you cope over time. I'm not gonna be a narc that's telling you to get sober right away. Oh, but also ask your friends for help. Yeah, get a circle of people who can be there for you

and understand and some people who also get the dynamic and walk you through it and because you can't do it alone. You really can't do it alone. And there's people who are very close with their parents and then there's people who are kind of distant and get fined at middle ground. And I will say being with people who are very close with their parents all the time is triggering.

Yeah, it's really triggering. It's also embarrassing to be one. very close with their parents all the time, it's triggering. It's really triggering. It's also embarrassing to be one. We make fun of JP all the time. JP McDade, our boy, he's on the road with me. He opens for me. He's on the podcast every month. He does a Patreon with us. Being a guy who fucking loves his dad is so fucking lame.

Being a guy who's like, my father, he the man. I respect the most. It's like What are you a fucking baby? Having too good a relationship is actually so embarrassing Why are you doing comedy? Too much love luckily JP, you know, I'm hitting, that's why. Yeah. Too much love. Luckily, JP, you know, I guess had other forms of not love. He's a great comic, but the believing his father, loving his father so much, you know, there's an appropriate amount.

So at least you're not one of those embarrassing people, too. That's a positive, you know, I'd rather be us than them. Yeah. But yeah, good luck, Pallad. It's got, you know, there's no way to round it, Yeah. Um, but yeah, good luck, pal. There's no way to round it though. And yeah, that's a great point. Have a support system.

I was very lucky. I lived with eldest. I lived with other, like, I lived with eldest and another one of my best friends at all times in this apartment. So we had a really nice little, like, kind of, little fake family thing going on here. And I also got closer with my siblings as a result

when we kind of talked our shit out about, like, hey, this is how I feel. Don't you feel like our childhood was fucked up? Mm-hmm and that brought me my brothers much closer together which we had problems when we were younger so That's other stuff I would say it's just look for your support system and understand it's gonna be a little tough But you're doing the right thing Oh this one she find a nice one Nice fun one for us to go out. Yeah, fun one. See what you got. That was that was that was heavy for both of us.

Damn bitch. I just came here to talk shit. I'm not coming about it. He is old. Hey, Stati, quick question for you. Probably applicable to a lot of people. I'm in dating mode now using hinge mainly. I get a respectable number of matches and likes, but I find that a lot of the time. I don't know what to write. The first message. So I put it off the point that it's probably weird to message.

So it is dealt. I think you don't use these apps that much as you are now, but what do you recommend as good strategies to kind of set a conversation, about flirting and not be weird? I feel like I'm fine talking to people in most contexts, I'm chewing my head about this, so any advice would be great. Thanks. Well, I mean, right off the bat, if you're not even fucking messaging them, who gives a fuck what you say? You're batting zero. This is the old, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. You could say anything and you'd have a better chance than what you're doing now. So that should be some kind of, that should make you feel good.

You're already batting zero, say anything and you have a better opportunity. I already know that you're a pretty sane person, because you're like, I don't wanna be weird, I don't wanna, because the weird people are fucking saying these things. Yo, I would love your fucking dead thinking, I'm not fucking out, what's good, bitch? Like that's the stuff that people are writing

and they're pressing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, forget about the chat. Yeah. You know, so I think half the time is like, we be our own like blockers. Yes. And it's a high works.

Yeah. I saw this, that's dope. Like I'm into that too. It's, you could be very basic. It's okay. Yes, you're going up against a ton of people, but it's better to be authentic than to be this way you think it's cool.

Right, right. And play these games and then get these people that you're not supposed to be talking to anyway. Yeah, I mean, at a very least, yeah, you're right. You're at the point where saying, high is better than saying nothing. I, Elders, what was your old, the classic Sula? Yeah, it was awesome It got like awesome and easy for me when I just treated it like a carpet bomb thing

And I was like I'm gonna try to match with whoever I can and they're like only send messages to the girls that you know rise above Rise above the fold and I just started every single thing with Sup all over case and the sunglasses emoji. And that's like, and that's like, I think I think that's a good approach because it's just like, you know, the emoji makes it like a little fun, but it's embarrassing yourself like trying to make some specific joke to that. That was a problem. Yeah.

And it's like, you know, if they're into it, they'll like respond to that. They're like, okay, this is normal kind of cute. Whatever. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I think bitch shit. Let me tell you, you have to be okay with rejection. Absolutely. It's okay. You're not gonna get people right and back people are not, you know, you gotta be okay with that. And then sometimes they're gonna respond and you'd be like, what a fuck did I write to you? Because I wrote this girl and I said, hi, what an exclamation mark. And she wrote back in all caps, what do you want? And I said, oh, dick.

Hi, don't, I want a man. Because if I wrote him hi, he write hi back. Yeah, he's like, hello, beautiful. Hi, how are you? Hello, princess. Yeah, why are you making this more complicated? Do I owe you money? Are you mad at me?

Do you already know me? Like, what is this? Yes, yes. Now I'm starting off, I'm on defense. Right, no, no. Totally. Those vibes are all the way fucked up. Yeah, so it's like, you gotta understand,

hey, there's gonna be, it is gonna be weird. If not on your part, their part. I think there's gonna be people who are gonna be like, nah, I'm not with it and that's okay. Yeah, absolutely. You just gotta keep going. And in fact, I actually think a really nice thing is going to everything assuming you're gonna get rejected.

And then when it doesn't happen, hey, great bonus. Like, as it's toffee, was like, I didn't know these girls wanted to do it through some. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're gonna get it through some. Go in, belly full of Chinese food, no belief in yourself whatsoever.

But yeah, the old Sula method, the Sump with the Sunglasses. This is a carpet bomb with a huge analogy. Right, right. The first message show is just like, you know, that's like so early in the process before anything actually matters. Like nothing matters until you get to the actual date.

Like things can fall through it any second. Absolutely. Yeah. Even the messaging, like don't spend a ton of time on the message. That's information. Yeah, yeah. We'll make a lot of plastic. Yeah, yeah. Do do spend the time on the matter. That's a meh- That's a meh- We'll go top.

Yeah, meh- Do do do do do do do do do do do And I would do exactly what you said, I'll just like try and get something specific. And listen, when it works, it really works. But then like most of the time, it's just like, you know, and I would, I would over talk whatever. And then when I was just like, ah, I'm going to treat this as like, yeah, like you said, until you meet, it's like, it's like a person in your phone. It doesn your phone, you know what I mean? Meet in person as quickly as possible, don't waste getting to know it. Because also, the vibe can shift,

so that would happen to me sometimes. People are bad via text. They're bad, or also they're just reading or what if they're different? They're online too much, so they're chronically talking and writing and what they think they're supposed to. So you don't have a real gauge of who this person is. You're like, let's me here.

You don't have to be dinner. It's just like, we're gonna drink or tea or whatever. Get to know them and then you'll realize most of these people are weird. Totally. Most of you people are nerds. Exactly. Most of you people ain't got no money.

It's not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the first date is a pure getting to know. That's like, that should be what, like, that should be essentially a con, that should be your first real conversation. And it's like, don't go into the first date thinking about too much. Just see, do I actually hit it off with this person in person? And you know how you do that?

This is like the three things. You come to the date, like, what's the thing that made you laugh this week? Something that like an old memory that you had or like a dream or experience that was like also really funny. And then something that you're looking forward to. Okay. Because these are three positive pop things

that like you'll have, they can't say no to this. And it kind of shows what kind of person you are. And we're not dumping the trash. No, no, no, no. We're not talking about current events. We're not talking about religion and purchasing stuff that can fuck up the vage.

Just feel that, yes, feel the vibe about it as quickly as possible. By the third day, you should find out of some eyes of a public but the first date you should not no certainly not and if it become and then if anyone is really push you about all that shit that's a red flag either way either way even if you people have you know what, Applemore and Uber, cause I'm gonna get it out of here. I'm a bodyer, I'm broke, I'm broke.

Oh, you know. So good luck to our pal here. We hope you get some matches, buddy. It's gonna be good. You're gonna be great. And don't over think it literally, in fact, do us a favor. Try eldest's method for 20 matches.

She's not about to do it. Subguing sunglasses. I'm about to do it. And let us, and call back and let us know how it went. Truly. That got old is plenty of, we won't look. I don't, I won't say what came out. Well, I don't say what, I don't say what fish took that bait.

Is that a girl now? Oh, he's a papilly married man. I don't really do. Okay, yeah. No, he's good, he's good. You just, it's a number of games. Oh, that's interesting. You didn't, it wasn't suck.

Yeah, what? Sup, sunglasses got you your wonderful wife that's right wow look at that women are dumb so fuck you care oh that's it Shout out to your wife. Hey man, she's the best. She really is. She's doing great work on it. Oh fuck.

All right, well that's going to do it for us. Sid, thank you so much. This is so fun. It's great stuff. Go follow Sidney. Please. Go searing person. Please.

And yeah, we definitely we got to have you back. There's so much more we need to talk about. Oh yeah, we did. We didn't win. So this is so far so far barely scratch the surface, but that's gonna do for us for oh when I should say My special And so by the time this comes out it's already announced December 5th coming out that rascal on Netflix go watch it folks Very excited for it. So thank you. That's it guys. We'll see you next time. Bye. Bye I'll just you know I was thinking the other day. I love you know what I love mango the fruit

I love it sweet. It's delicious and I was eating a piece of mango pre-cut from a beautiful market here You know how a story has some beautiful fruit markets absolutely That was my move I would get a little fruit salad. You know many times I've I've gotten sucked off be like this actually One time I sucked off. Be like, this is actually one time after a day I was like, what a comeback for some fruit salad. And I thought it was smooth. And then some girl after she fucking was like, that was so weird. You asked me to come over for a fruit salad. I was like, I don't know. I wasn't drunk. I

didn't, I wasn't drinking at the time. Well, they say mangoes are an effort, Dziak. Well, here's the thing. Thank you for bringing me back on point. Because I was eating the mango and I've oftentimes I've had mango and gotten pussy right afterwards. Yeah, and I was thinking to myself, what if this mango made my dick hard? You know, I was like, now that would be something else. That'd be awesome. And I am happy to report that there is a new kid in the game.

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You heard it here first. I don't know. Yeah, I, because like I said, I've done a bunch of them. And in the end, they also have an amino acid that helps increase blood flow. They got all kinds of science shitting here. They're making them taste delicious. I am so happy. It was the goal of this podcast. Truly, we sort of made a podcast to discover

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There you go, sorry. We tried to give it the applause, it deserved, but some asshole wasn't ready to go. And look, make America hard again. I think on, whatever side of the aisle you're on, conservative, liberal, leftist, centrist, we could all use a harder dick. Maybe if we busted more with harder dicks, all this division in the world would go away all this.

I think this is such a good product. Eldis, I think you might have to change your longstanding opinion on ED medication in general, because look, here's the thing about my ego, Alex, you might not need it, but you're gonna want it, pal. Yeah. All right? I know I've spoken about it a lot, but I am excited to try this one. Yes. A big part of that is the dissolving factor. Quick, works within 10 minutes, my friend.

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