Stavvy's World - George Civeris and Sam Taggart

Episode Date: March 27, 2023

StraightioLab hosts George Civeris and Sam Taggart join the pod to break down Greek-Albanian relations, browsing in the early days of the internet, the differences between gay couples and straight couples, and more. George, Sam and Stav help callers including a guy who has a low libido when he's sober and a sperm donor wondering if he should reveal his identity to the kid.Subscribe at patreon.com/stavvysworld for exclusive, Patreon-only episodes.

I have a big family and they're spread around multiple countries. So a few years ago it was my brother's wedding and most of them decided to come. Great news, but a big problem. Where do you put eight people all with different requirements and keep them all together? We looked at some hotels but then it was obvious get an Airbnb. My mom and I were able to find the perfect place. It was a big house with multiple rooms and in a part of the city with woods

and walking trails all around. The Airbnb also included a huge kitchen where we all got together the day after the wedding for a big family meal. This is a cherished memory for my family and me. And whenever I drive by that location, it always makes me smile. Not long ago, my mom and I stopped by that area to walk around and remember one of the most special times for my family

Whether you're traveling with friends or with family for a big wedding or justification get an Airbnb Bye bye Welcome everybody to stop this world 904800 style. Paul and leave us a fucking voicemail. We'll answer your problems. Big, great, great app. Through my fucking faves here.

Yeah, so to stop it all. Yeah, I shoulda. Yeah, we got two Greeks eldest. You Albanian fuck. Are you Albanian? Yeah. Yeah. Well, you are really like connecting cultures and like fixing years of prejudice.

No, we're not fixing Greek Albanian. Real Ford thing. Yeah, it's Sam, I'm learning a lot already. Did we introduce you, did I get caught up in speaking Greek to George? Why? I interrupted you. That's okay, just because I wanted to. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Everyone know that I speak Greek. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll do the podcast in Greek and then these two can try and figure it out. And the audience, we've got of course Sam Taggart. Very funny, great pod, Stradio Lab. I was on board as soon as I heard the name. I was like, now that's a fucking name.

Stradio. It's a really good name. Stradio Lab is a name. Stradio Lab is a great name. Take that, Robert Crolowicz, you motherfucker. So yeah, thanks for coming out. Thanks for coming out to Queens Boys. We got ourselves a belly full of Greek food.

Oh, thanks for having us. What a delight. We're having the time of our lives. You were learning a lot. I'm learning culturally a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're very, yeah, so Sam, Albanians enjoy a very low, very low position in Greek culture.

Their immigrants to intergrease. And if you're racist in Greece, kinda your favorite, you know, I guess, whipping boy would be the fuck, it would be Albanians. So much so that you can be like an anti-racist and all other areas. I like a family member of mine, I mean, whatever, I should say this on it.

Yeah. I'm family member of my children. I got an old, like great uncle, you know, old guy. At one point, I was talking about how not racist he is. And he's like, I, you know, there was a black person that was moving into my building, and I had neighbors that signed something to like not let him in, and I spearheaded the effort

to welcome him in. I felt really strongly about that, and I really deepened myself, feel like everyone is equal. And I was like, oh wow, interesting. He was like, that's except fucking Albania. I swear to God, I mean, it really is like. It's awesome.

It's so funny. I remember like we, and we've told, like me and eldest have been friends with our kids. So like, we have plenty of story. We just quickly, for you, for your guys, we had our other best friend that we grew up with. His family did not let eldest in the house. Yeah, just sit out.

Like really? Like literally. His dad was the fucking villager Greek guy who would not have an albany in his house It's actually it's like years of like friendship and him I guess watching L this not steal things to let him in the house like we're talking Crazy old world racism We met him. I once heard someone say that this is like I'm so sorry I'm talking about this by the way. No, no, no. And by the way, just so everyone knows,

everyone in my nuclear family is not racist against them. Yeah, the same can't be said for the how it gets family. No, no, no. No, and I do think like, things like, like in our generation, gris things are changing and I actually, for the better. But anyway, but I once heard someone say that Albanians like make the best, like, you know, what's the word? Like cleaning people or whatever because

like their hands are coarse. I mean, it's just, it's awful. It's literally like, the actual physical thing. They're like being evolved. They evolved. They evolved. They're so darn hard. If you have a cloth, you could scrape with your palms. Yeah, if you have a baby and bra low ends. I mean, the Greek prejudices in general are so weird. Like, actually, homophobia in Greece is fascinating because they're not like violently homophobic.

It's just like not talked about. Yeah, yeah, yeah. One time, my mom was like, a few years ago, she was like, you know, things are really progressing in Greece, like there were three separate gay people that ran from mayor of Athens. And I was like, oh, were they out? She was like, well, no.

Yeah. She was like, they just seemed kind of back at you. But she was really venturing in this like a sign of progress. She was like three different people. No, that's all. I mean, it's, yeah, let's get into that. One more Albanian story. I'd love to get into Greek homophobic because it's also Greece also like the classic everyone seems gay. Yeah. Everyone is homophobic, plays. But we recently we met a Greek guy. He was awesome. Like a Greek business owner,

type of guy. And he was literally, Eldish, what was the conversation like, where he was like, I was just like, yeah, I'm Albanian. And then he just instantly goes into like, you know, it's just like a minute after I met him, he was like, oh, you know, I know Greeks in Albania and have a lot of problems. I've been in America a long time.

I never had problems with Albanian. I always liked Albanian. He's giving him the, like, what a white person in the South in the 60s would say to a black person. Where he's like, whatever's going on over there has nothing to do with me. I always think you guys are good. He was basically like, yeah, I know things got bad between Greeks and Albanians for a while there, but when that all started I was already living in America.

He wasn't even saying it's wrong. He was just saying I wasn't part of it. I didn't do it. I wasn't a part of it. I can't promise I wouldn't know if I wasn't there, but I wasn't there. It's awesome. Yeah, Greece is a great place. Have you ever been Sam? No, I've never been. Yeah, Greece is a great place. Have you ever been Sam? Do you have any? Wow, interesting stuff. We're gonna plan Sam is gonna come and get it. We're gonna plan Sam's gonna come and get it. Because, and it needs that, but maybe it'll happen this summer,

I think if we play. Well, if you guys are done, I'm gonna be there in September. We're only in September. Oh, September's a good time to be. You know, maybe we can meet up, but, because you're, so to give, I believe you're our first Greek guest, George.

Wow. I think so, we haven't had anybody else have we all just no not yet Wow, so that this is big for the pod Really you're really sold out getting only non-Greek. I know I know believe me. I said it's a real point of issue. I had basil the comedian who would tour Greek festivals you know him I do not know Oh, but I'm like I really don't know a lot about like Greek American because you actually I? I do not know. But I'm like, I really don't know a lot about Greek American culture.

Because I mean, I did partly live here, but like, there was always, I feel like there's always a divide between like Greek people who feel like they're more Greek-American and then like Greek-American people who are like second-thirds generation. Absolutely. No, I feel that for sure because I feel like I'm in a weird zone where my, I'm first generation,

I was born here, but I'm fluent in Greek, my family's over there. I don't, like, I do still feel a really strong connection to Greece, but yes, there's absolutely this like, you know, watered down Greek identity shit where it's like people go to the Greek festival and they go to, you know, and it's almost like a novelty thing where it's like, like, it's so easy to Greek people to just become white people within the generation or two, just regular ass honkeys. And that literally, part of mortality is also like,

damn, if I have children, are they just gonna become like regular ass white people in two generations? That literally scares me. I'm like, I remember when we, because we lived in the States for like seven years. regular ass white people in two generations. That literally scares me. Oh my God. I remember when we, because we lived in the States for like seven years. So basically I, when I was a kid,

I was in the States for seven years. Then we moved back and I actually went to Greeks speaking high school in Athens, and which is why I then feel like, if you added up, it's, you know, whatever. I feel comfortable saying it. Absolutely. You grew up in Greece. Absolutely.

You grew up in Greece. Anyway, but I remember when we were in New Jersey, which is where we lived, I felt like I was trying to see more American because I felt like foreign, whereas Greek Americans wanted for street crack to see more Greeks. To see more Greeks. They'd be like, hi, I'm Varvara.

This is my yaya. And I would say, like, I would say, like, my grandma, and my grandpa, when I was talking to Cel grandma, my grandpa would have like talking to someone. I was telling you out, dude. I was the real sellout. Yeah. A Greek Uncle Tom, sounds like. That's like what you were.

You were. Yeah, you were just, you were just hot. Yeah, I get it. You also probably had the thick ass accent coming straight from it. I was like pretty, my sisters had, my parents and my sisters had more accents than I did. I was sort of like young enough

because we moved here when I was like second. Oh, okay, I got you, I got you. That then by the time we moved back when I was in like eighth grade or ninth grade, I felt then that I had become more American and then I had like getting used to being in Greece again. Yeah, that's interesting. I think because we would go,

because we would have my father would go to Greece and pretend he was a successful businessman for five weeks. That was like, he would take out loans to go on vacation and he would pretend his business was doing well. And we wouldn't even, it wouldn't really be a vacation. We were like just living in Athens for like three weeks and we go on a two week vacation. We're only in the beach for two weeks,

but my dad would see his old friends and talk about how good he was doing in America. It was like this weird, that's so funny because we have the opa, say I'm sorry, you're right. No, it's okay, you'll get in there, Sam. We'll get in there, Sam. That's okay.

But we had the op six years here. So my parents came here to do the American dream. They were both straight A students. They went to college and they were like, we're gonna go be engineering PhD to make money. And then we were living in New Jersey in suburban New Jersey, not super picturesque. And because this was during the pre of pre-crisis bubble

where everyone agrees was making so much money, my parents would go back to Greece and their friends from high school would all be like driving porches. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they'd be like, wait, are we stupid? We're living in New Jersey and for like getting PhD. And all these people that we went to high school with

that like never left nothings, and we're like, you know, super involved in like student politics or whatever, are now like CEO. Not paying their taxes. Exactly. Yeah, it's just like clocking into nap. My godfather, I've told his story,

but my godfather had a government job where he was like a government handyman. Yeah. And he would clock in and then go to, he would clock into that, he had an overnight shift, he would sleep there, he would never work, he would see it a bed, he put a bed in his office, he slept there, and he would leave and do work for his other job.

Yeah, he was just like a dear con man. So the idea of a, Greece was awesome bed, like in 2006 dude, right before, my uncle was like a VP at a bank or something, dumb is one of the dumbest motherfuckers I've ever met my life. And they would go to like Europe, like they would go to other parts of Europe. They'd be like, you know, flying. He would, he would travel with his favorite soccer team and watch them play in like champions league matches. And

him and my, my aunt would go on cruises and she's a hoarder so that she'd have like little fucking trinkets from like fucking Berlin and like fucking, it was crazy and now they're like, it's like crazy how much they should have changed and greased. I mean, it is now sort of on the up and up again. And I think like, you know, it's not as bad as it was like seven years ago, let's say.

Sure, sure. But yeah, to be honest, I still don't know how it all added up. Well, there's also, okay, you were talking about like being a sort of public sector employee. Like, yeah, honest, I still don't know how it all added up. Well, there's also, okay, you were talking about like being a sort of public sector employee. Like, Sam, like that's like a, that's a stereotype. Literally the idea of a public sector employee is like a Greek cultural stereotype.

Yes. That's what that means, like, oh, that person is lazy and lazy, doing a network. Oh, it's like, there would be like a Greek sitcom and someone, that would be their job as a way to denote that they're like a lazy guy. This is a fucking dollar, a dumb asshole. Yeah.

And it's also kind of the dream because it's like, you want that position because it's like, yeah, free money. It's literally free money from the government and you can just go work a different job or go get pussy on the side. Literally, he would buy prostitutes on the job. He was also like a weird sex scene.

He rocks. Now he sounds great. No, he rules. He rules. I would be, now he's in, now they've moved from Athens. They went back to Knoxville, which is where he's from originally. I love Knoxville. Great.

That's one of my favorite. We went there every year for 10 years. It's an awesome island and they live there now. My godfather, my godmother, and he literally, they've gone back to like the bartering economy where my godfather makes, has honey, he makes bee, like he's a beekeeper and he trades like his honey for like moonshine and like rabbit stew.

Like they're living like, wow. It's pretty sick. It's pretty sick. Yeah. Well I'm glad I now know that Greeks hate Albanians. Yeah. Yeah. He hate people and government workers.

And government workers. And I would say in that order too. I would say. Yeah. I wouldn't say that's the ranking. Honestly, maybe now that it's a little more progressive, government workers than it's like right. Albanians than government workers.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely Albanians won. Albanian ain't moving. I'm from the top spot. It's like right right then government workers. Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely I'll be in one that Moving I'm from the top spot Last time I was in Greece, you know goodies like the faster course. That's our that's our McFarlane menu Can you believe that wow what so goodies is like the McDonnell's degrees? What was on the pride menu? I actually you know what after we start recording. I good check it out because I'll just find the pride menu But it has like fully what's it called goody Oh, oh, do you do and what do you have what do you you're just paying attention?

You're not paying attention and this is why the Greeks are right about out Bainey I Liff this albanian out of poverty is not even listening to the goodies pride You living in a bartering Well, it's amazing about him. His hands are biologically different. So he's better at looking for a... You know what? No, that's actually the part.

There it is. There we go. This is real. Goudi's better good house. Put on the bed. And they've made the buns, Glegan and the buns are gay. Wow.

Wow, look at that. Actually, it looks so unappetizing. Yeah, that looks horrific. It's how they view homosexuality. Yeah,appetized. Yeah, that looks horrific. It's how they view homosexuality But it really is just crazy like I graduated high school in 2009 and like would not dream of being out Wow And now to go back and to see a goodies pride. Yeah, yeah, it's really something interesting Yeah, what the fuck?

That's the and have you ever had any pre George pre whatever do you have any run-ins with Greeks or Albanians Sam? No. No. Where are you from originally? Like the Midwest in the South. Ah, that's not real Greek or Albanian country. No, I never met any Greeks or Albanians. You know, I watched my big fat Greek wedding.

Of course. Of course, of course, of course. I mean, honestly, when like I first was meeting like George and he was like well. I'm Greek I'm Greek I'm Greek I was like yeah, we're all something But now you know I've continued to learn and oh yeah, I'm Constantly broadening absolutely that's what you're saying is crazy. I sort of felt like it's even though I talk about being and all the perspective is constantly broadening. Absolutely. That's what you're saying is crazy. I sort of feel it with like, it's even though I talk about being Greek all the time,

then I'll meet like an Italian American who loves talking about being Italian. And I'm like, no one cares about me. Greeks have a huge like supremacist thing. Like there's every time there's like a poll that's like which country believe, you know, thinks they are superior to everyone else. It's Greece, New York, and the charts. And it's like a poll that's like which country believe you know thinks they are superior to everyone else. It's Greece No off the charts. Yeah, and it's like oh, yeah, oh dude

It's crazy and it's also the anti-Semitism survey, but that's a different conversation So wait George, people are talking about it. Yeah, yeah, we saw it with Arab's face on it. Oh that's fascinating It's my family so my grandfather grew up in a Jewish neighborhood and really and like it was occupied by the Nazis Yeah, so he my grandfather grew up in a Jewish neighborhood and really, and like it was occupied by the Nazis. Yeah. So he, not only is so pro-Jewish, but it's like, he probably feels like more kinship to Jewish people than the interesting people. So maybe I missed the anti-pid.

I mean, that's crazy to me. Yeah, that approach. It's like, best I've ever seen is like not anti-semester. But pro is out of control. Yeah, no, it's actually so much so that like, so he died recently and my, and my mom, his daughter texted my boyfriend who was Jewish and was like, Georgia's grandfather would have loved

that you are Jewish. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. He would have, yeah, every day he would go, he would think, I just want my grandson to get circumcised cock. That's why that's my one dream. Let him be free from the hood. Your mom is like the queen of thinking she's saying something for us.

Yes, but it's like, well, it's all so many green. That's so many green. Absolutely. And it's also the sort of, I mean, this is not just great for people, but it's like when someone's like, I'm a history buff, so what are you? You know, it's like, you know, saying something that is sort of like cartoonishly offensive,

but because you genuinely care and wanna learn about someone's culture. Yeah, that's cute almost. I have, we should be allowed to say shit that ignorant. When you come from a good place. Yeah, I mean, it's like, especially when you're talking, like especially it's like, there needs to be a moment of amnesty for trans shit

where it's like completely well-meaning people should be able to ask something that sounds horrendous and then we're like, don't say it that way. You know what I mean? Like, I know, you know what I mean? It's like, you don't wanna, you're so scared to say some offensive shit. Where you're like, I saw a desk went to be educated. Like, and they genuinely don mean? It's like, you don't wanna, you're so scared to say some offensive shit. Well, you're like,

I saw a desk would to be educated. Like, and they genuinely don't know where to look. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Cause sometimes asking the questions comes off as, yeah, and then you might even get educate yourself, sweetie. That's a response that's like, I'm fucking trying, I'm bum. Okay. Why do you think that's actually one of the reasons

I think get cis gay people should be like task with, like being ambassadors. Exactly. Translators. Translators should like have comfortable lives and not have to do with trans. Yes, yes.

But then a few sort of like, I love this idea of cis gay men that have like, like, that's just gay white guys, right? Yeah, I think you guys got it, let's be honest. That happens all of them have like, all of gay man that has like, like, you guys got it easy, let's be honest. And all of them have like, all of the major in like, so for apology of gender.

Yes, yes, yes. And they're from like Connecticut. Right. And so maybe their job can be sort of like, being the first line of defense. Oh, I like this. It's like the Peace Corps. Exactly.

Yeah. Yes, you, in exchange for using Lingo that black trans women came up with. Yeah. Gay white cis men need to do a certain amount of hours. Like trans lighting. Two years in Indiana. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, I was, where were you? I was stationed in Fort Wayne. Yeah. I love that. This is a great idea, guys. Yeah, the food was horrible. Yeah.

I love it. This is a great idea, guys. Yeah, the food was horrible. Yeah. I love it, dude. We're gonna be, yeah, back wherever you grew up, that's who needs it. Head to Michigan. Head to Michigan, dude. I'll go. Yeah, you should go. Beautiful. That's fucking hilarious.

So you were just had to do sneaky gay shit as a youth or what? Yeah, I didn't really act. Act on it until like college. Okay, I didn't really act. Both of you. Act on it until like college. Okay. I didn't either actually. I had not even like kissed a man until my freshman year. Yeah, me either.

Did you guys ever have to fake being straight? Yes. I hooked up with girls in high school in the beginning of college. You got pussy in high school? Holy fuck. Dance. See, that's what's so funny.

I didn't get pussy. It's like, I always think about the closet of gay guys, that got pussy, I'm like, they were getting pussy, I couldn't get pussy. I was like, they were like revolted. I mean, I know that's not how it works, but when you're like 19, you're like, gay guys are going like, and getting pussy,

holding their, putting a clothespin on their nose, and eating pussy, and I'm over here begging, how did they pull it off? I was always mesmerized when I would hear those stories. With one time I tried to eat pussy, it was like so deeply embarrassing. And I think back on it, and just hurt. Because we were literally drunk as one's house

and like 69ing. And I was like, and I literally was just like drunk as one's house and like 69 And I literally was just like pretending that the angle is My neck The idea that a straight 16 year old would know any better sure I don't, if anything, honestly, probably a gay man who have some more pizzazz. Sure, sure, sure. He would be performing. Yeah, he'd be performative about it at least. Yeah, yeah. So 69 is so funny too. Well, it's a classic position. We're going like, well, first, she was 69 and then, yeah,

yeah, someone's floor. You know, like, what are we doing? Who is this girl? What kind of girl is this? You know I'm saying? You're very sweet. Yeah, very nice, very smart. Yeah. I guess that makes sense. Well, Kallaler not that perceptive. Yeah, yeah, yeah I actually think she could tell but that was like part of the appeal like I think she was like maybe I can turn him Oh true in Indiana that you get a fucking thousand dollars you turn a gay guy straight you go to the governor You tell the governor he gives you the key to the city Because yeah, being gay like really red is like sweet like it's like oh That makes sense that makes I guess that makes sense,

thinking back on it now, how did those guys get pussy? It's because you weren't nervous about it. And you were just, you asked nice, because I like, I could do, I was a sweet kid in high school, but I really wanted to put you so bad that the second it got close,

I was like, you know, it's like any attraction faded, because I was like, I hope I pull this off, if I don't get busy, I'll kill myself and they could feel that just emanating off me. That's sort of how I felt about, so I had heard the guys were jerking off together. And we straight up, it was a lot. But not in a sobby's world. Not in a way.

But it was like a big thing that would happen. And then the girls would be like, oh my god, you guys do that, blah, blah. And I was like, how do I act chill enough that I'm invited to the gym so far? I didn't even try to. You know, I'm like fully hard. Like walking. They could fully smell it on us.

Like, yeah. Oh, I would never be invited. I would never once be invited. Did you ever jerk off with your boys? We had like, there was one sleepover where there was like, there was more of a jerk-off station than jerk-off with the boys. Like it wasn't like we all beat off together, but it was like, you know, this guy had internet, and you know, I'm coming from inner city Baltimore. We didn't really have, I didn't get internet until I was like 13, 14.

So he had internet, and he also might have had like, it was, I didn't even have dial up yet and he had like, you know, for whatever was the precursor to Fios. So we were downloading songs off Napster. We were like going crazy using internet and one of those functions was- Going crazy using internet. Yeah. Yeah.

That was, yeah, that was like, Oh yeah, we were browsing the whole thing. We were browsing truly, we truly were. We were on fucking E-bombs world, we were on fucking intensity, whatever the other shit is. I remember the first piece of pornography I saw at that sleepover was like, I'm one of those fucked up cringes inducing what, I think it was called intensity,

wasn't that what it was called, or e-bombs. Maybe e-bombs still had that porn set before it became like a basically memes video place. I don't really remember. But it was a girl dressed as a nun with a crucifix interpussy. But also she had a huge thing back there. She had a wildly hairy pussy.

So I hadn't even seen that. Truly, that was the first time I saw detail pussy. Like, you know, I guess I had seen like a playboy where it's like, you don't really see pussy, see tits. I just spread open. Just like that honestly did scare me from pussy for a little bit because I was like, what the fuck is going on?

Harry is fucked, just a gap with a fucking cross in it. It was still like, but I'm gonna trick off to this. And then I was like, this is fucked up, but you can't see her tits still in this and that is doing it for me. But I think I beat off to, what was, what were we beating off to at this at Phil's house in 2000 like three. This is fresh off 9-11. No. Actually, this is probably pre 9-11 because this is sixth grade. So we didn't even know the

towers have fallen. It was a simpler time. It was a similar time. I'm gonna guess it was just some kind of, oh you know, it literally might, this might be hack, but I actually, I didn't jerk off there because I was just a little stage fright, it was just a little too much. But I think, I literally think this is so hack, it might have been the Tommy Lee Pamela. And it was.

I mean, it's a classic. It's a classic, you know what I mean? It was also really hyped. Like that was... I mean, it's a classic for you. It's a classic, you know what I mean? It was also really hyped. Like, even at that time, like, I love the whatever it's shows. Yeah. We're always like the Tommy and Van.

The Tommy and Pamela Anderson sex tape is so like queer-coded to me, because it's like, yeah. She's like an iconic queen, and then he has a giant cock. Yeah, I'm like, why would a freak? I'm on a bunch of kids. Yeah, why would a freak, I wanna watch you. Yeah.

I'm like, this is Cam. It is Cam, who's so right. Yeah, that would hurt. Yeah, I honestly remember seeing it and my feelings being hurt because of how big his penis was. Sam, are you acting like what? You hear about it and you're like,

well, it can't be that big. Yes, literally. By the way, Greek icon. Greek, right? Didn't get any of those jeans I can't drum and my dick don't look like that. I got all the other skills My the Colin Farrell sex tape was my so classic. Oh, of course. Yeah I heard about that one and that one I didn't watch because I heard the rumors of his dick being so big That it would hurt my and I was past that right?

Mm-hmm. This is our this later in life. I will do it when that shit came out heard the rumors of his dig being so big that it would hurt my and I was past that right. This is this later in life. I will do when that shit came out. I was later probably 2005. Yeah, because he was filming their dev live. Yeah, that's why it's the end of all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like it was like the like conferee one of the best pieces of ass of all time and still to this day. Yeah, he rules. I love that. I mean, I was watching the Miami vice. But Jamie Foxx, my wife and I was like, damn, this, I was watching the Miami vice But Jamie Foxx my rice and I was like damn this is I was like that's who I think I am there. It is Thank you. I mean first of all he looks so good But he looks he but this is not even like

But you know what I did see this one I forgot this Remember the girl was black Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah was black. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a very nice penis, but it's not like a Tommy Lee one. It's not like a huge. That's a nice hog though, you know? Sure. That's the wrong with that. And the girl was hot I remember. I remember it's like really verbal, right?

It's very verbal and he's also like, he is worshipping her. I mean, that's the whole thing is that he's like so grateful that he is going down on her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's sort of like feminist porn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I of like feminist porn. It's feminist, yeah. Yeah. No, I love Confro. It in my head, pull up, pull up Confro in my Emmy vice.

Elders. I watched that recently, and I was like, yeah, I want to see exactly. Like in my head, that's what I look like. Oh my God. Oh my God. I'm like, I know I don't, but in my head, I go through life being like, that's 100% what it looks like.

That's so funny. And it's so... Oh, I know I do see it though. I see it, I see it. I got so pretty. And there is sort of like, three Italian menace training. Yeah, yeah. He's also, he's all in this movie.

He also was, it was, he literally got off the set of that movie went right to rehab. He's given interviews where he's like, I do not remember. And he's like, I'm not trying to be rude. I literally don't remember that movie. Like filming that movie. Because I love that movie and it's a really fun, and I'm a big Michael Manhead.

And I hadn't seen it till recently. And I was like, oh, this is like a fucking, this is like a fucked up, almost like art movie. It's not, because I watched it thinking like, Miami Vice, fucking guns, action movie, all this kind of shit. And it's a fucking weird art piece about losing yourself in your work and like, you don't know who you are anymore. And it's like, and then plus one of my favorite actors

is on drugs and he's like, goes to rehab, I was like, this is me, dude. I'm fucking, I was high as shit, I'm like, dude, I'm blurring the lines, dude. What's content? Who's Stavros? You know, and I'm like, this is my, I'm like, and I look exactly like him.

Like, this is the most important piece of media in my life. In my life. In my life. In my life. In my life. And he falls in love with a hot Chinese actress. I would love to get that in the mix.

Who, by the way, didn't even know English. She did the movie phonetically. No, it's crazy. Anyway, that's my little Michael Mann, Miami Vice moment. Let's watch that big fan of that movie. And that's who I am in my heart is that guy. That's who I am during this time.

Well, actually, it's nice to see this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. See it, it's making a little more sense how I perceive myself, it's nice to see this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. See it. It's making a little more sense how I perceive myself, how I act in the world when I think I look like that. He really is one of the hottest men. Oh, he's a really awesome. Yeah. And he's just, and it's cool to see him like bounce back and just like, oh yeah. Seem happier and like beat, just show these also just like such a good ass actor and a good person. It's yeah, I think it's like a real sweetheart. Yeah.

I'll just you know, I was thinking the other day. I love you know what I love mango the fruit. I love it sweet. It's delicious. And I was eating a piece of mango pre-cut from a beautiful market here. You know how a story has some beautiful fruit markets. Absolutely. That was my move. I would get a little fruit salad. You know, many times has some beautiful fruit markets. Absolutely. That was my move. I would get a little fruit salad. You know how many times I've gotten sucked off? I'd be like, this is actually... One time I don't have to write down.

I was like, want to come back with some fruit salad. And I thought it was smooth. And then some girl, after she fucking was like, that was so weird, you asked me to come over for a fruit salad. I was like, I don't know. I wasn't drinking at the time. Well, they say mangoes are an effort, Dziak. Well, here's the thing.

Thank you for bringing me back on point. Because I was eating the mango. And oftentimes I've had mango and gotten pussy right afterwards. And I was thinking to myself, what if this mango made my dick hard? You know? I was like, Now that would be something else. And I am happy to report that there is a new kid in the game. You know I'm a dick pill evangelist eldest. You know I'm an ED. I've tried them all from the gas stations to other other services. MangoRx now has a new ED poll that is game changing, okay? Really?

Taste like mango, my friend. Delicious, just like it. And they have a nice proprietary, because like I said, I've tried them all, Eld. They got a new proprietary formula that combines the active ingredients in Seattle and Viagra with oxytocin known as the love hormone. I've never heard of oxytocin before in my life, but let me tell you this, made my dick harder than ever.

We're talking zwing! You know when they take out a sword and it goes, that's how I felt putting my dick out of the condom. It was like unsheathing my hardcock. It was pure metal after I had some mango Rx, bro. Shining in the light. Yes, one little gleam. One little gleam when I turn my dick a little bit. Mango Rx tastes good and makes your dick hard like metal folks, you heard it here first.

I don't know, yeah, cause like I said, I've done a bunch of them. And they also have an amino acid that helps increase blood flow. They got all kinds of science in here. They're making them taste delicious. I am so happy. It is, it was the goal of this podcast. Truly, we sort of made a podcast to discover and work with the new innovators on the cutting edge of the heart making your dick hard science in the field, right? People who have a beautiful goal, here's their mission, make America hard again, eldest.

They have, you know, let's get, can we get, fuck, fucking idiot. There you go, sorry. We tried to give it the applause, it deserved, but some asshole wasn't There you go. Sorry. We tried to give it the applause it deserved, but some asshole wasn't ready to go. And look, make America hard again. I think on what, whatever side of the aisle you're on, conservative liberal leftist centrist, you could, we could all use a harder dick. Maybe if we busted more with harder dicks, all this division in the world would go away, eldest. I think this is such a good product, eldest. I think you might have to change your long standing opinion

on ED, medication in general, because look, here's the thing about mango orics. You might not need it, but you're gonna want it, pal. Yeah. All right. I know I've spoken about it a lot, but I am excited to try this one. Yes. A big part of that is the

dissolving factor quick works within 10 minutes my friend the dissolving factor and the yummy taste do make me very You've seen you see me take adibles that's just because you wanted a little dummy I've seen you take weed adibles. I've seen you take fiber adibles where you're shitting yourself because you wanted a momentary snack. I've seen you take thumbs on an empty stomach just because you wanted the taste. And that's how we got elders through the door here with mango Rx.

It's easy folks. Buying mango is so easy. Just go to mangorx.com, complete a short and secure telemedicine visit. You're in your out and mango can be shipped discreetly straight to your door. The telemedicine visit is over in literally a matter of minutes. It's nothing. Quick and easy.

Be sure to use code, stop 20 to save 20% off your first order. You and your partner are going to love it. That goes double for you, LD. I can't wait. I have a big family and they're spread around multiple countries. So a few years ago, it was my brother's wedding and most of them decided to come. Great news, but a big problem. Where do you put eight people all with different requirements and keep them all together? We looked at some hotels, but then it was obvious, get an Airbnb. My mom and I were able to find the perfect place. It was a big house with multiple rooms and in a part of the city with woods and

walking trails all around. The Airbnb also included a huge kitchen where we all got together the day after the wedding for a big family meal. This is a cherished memory for my family and me. And whenever I drive by that location, it always makes me smile. Not long ago, my mum and I stopped by that area to walk around and remember one of the most special times for my family, whether you're traveling with friends or with family for a big wedding or justification, get an Airbnb. Yeah. Um, anyway, I don't know why we're talking about conferred.

Uh, porn. Oh, porn. Oh're talking about conferred. Poor. Poor. Oh, beating off. Yes, yeah. So yeah, I didn't fully do the jerk off parties. Elders, were you ever, you must have beat off with your boys in the suburbs? No jerking off, but we're definitely like, you know,

fake sucking each other's cock. That's a big difference. That's like, yeah. So like, wait, that's somehow better. It's like, it's literally like, you're just something you're born in, you're all school, you're fucking gay. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Classics, though.

Touch each other's dick, spit like, you like that you're fucking gay, dude. Right, right, right. They kind of think flicking each other's balls to cause people a little more. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Classic. Like, really, I think my my high school football team

and the shit that some of those guys who like that feels Greek because it's extreme homophobia, but being so gay that it's like, this is just being gay at this point. Like they literally ask to see the gay kids dick. And I'm like, I know you're, you think you're making fun of him, but you ask to see his penis. And if he pulls it out, you just kind of did a gay thing with a gay guy.

Right. It's like, it's not booing anymore. But then from the gay person's perspective, it makes it even more like confusing, because then you're like, how am I, like, well, it is like almost psychological torture. Exactly, literally like my penis. But it's like almost psychological torture. Yeah, literally. But it's like, but wait, you're gonna make fun of me for it.

You know, even you guys doing that like miming for a second, I was like, I'm hard. I was like, this is so hot. I wish I could like do it again and be comfortable. Yeah. Oh my god. To be in a high school environment where everyone is of age.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, 32 year old high school. 32 year old high schoolers. Everyone is at everyone is having jerk off part. And they're like, bullying, like, shoving my face. Yeah. I'm like, no, stop it, stop.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's good. That's a nice little, you should do the porno wing of Stradio Labs. Oh, yeah. You should be working on it. Trust yeah, that's good. That's a nice little, you should do the porno wing of Stradio Lab. Oh, yeah. We're working on it. Trust me, that video exists. Yeah, I mean, we've talked about it many times here on the podcast, but we truly are jealous

of the thing gay guys have figured out, where it's like, you know, where it's like, it's just like everyone just gets to suck everyone off and no one really minds or like nobody's feelings are hurt Where it's like I was like I was doing this bit I I'm not putting it in this special because it just like doesn't fit with the others because I was doing a bit about Like poly stuff because I'm dating a lot of poly girls because it's like this weird It's like you get to get pussy and also have a friend at the same time without having a girlfriend It's like a nice little hack where I feel like I'm even the close we were talking before

I think I'm kind of figuring out a way to be straight with gay. Yeah, you know with the gay like I have a lot of girls in my life Who just like they have a boyfriend, but they'll also just like come over and fuck for a weekend and that's cool Which feels like close to the gay thing. But I was thinking like, I don't get, but that's like a rare straight. Straight people who do that are rare. People might identify as Pauli. Exactly. Sort of big problem.

Well, you know, my joke with Pauli people is, it sounds great theoretically, but I don't have time to get into Dr. Who. Yeah. Yeah. It's a, it's a, it in a doctor who. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's such a beautiful. I think it's funny, like when my own, like where my limit is. Like I, yesterday I was talking to a friend who was like, oh, I went out and it was really fun.

Like this guy set my dick on the dance floor. And I was like, on the dance floor. And he was like, yeah, a lot of people are doing that now. Yes, I'm doing that now. And. I was like that's not right. I was like you're supposed to go to the dark corner. Go to the booth like a gentleman. What the fuck were animals now? Yeah like the bathroom or the dark corner. Yeah always a dark corner. I was really and then he was like yeah this guy fisted somebody on the I was like, wow, we're bringing back cruising We're bringing back I mean cruising

Today We're feeling those like don't do it. I just don't want to see it. Yeah Don't say each other's dicks. What if my sub that I'm walking on a leash When someone brought like a group of We together when someone brought like a group of Of sort of men that were acting like puppies and then they just waited in the corner So they waited in the corner for this So there were these men that were on all fours and then we all went to a party and then for the duration of a party They waited in a corner until the guy that was in charge of them was right to leave and they fall with him

in a corner until the guy that was in charge of them was right in the middle of the fall with him. Wait, was that the New Year's? Now I'm sort of like, yeah, I'm sort of like maybe I heard of this from our friends. But it was a New Year's party two years ago. Yeah, yeah, that's awesome. Okay, wait, I was in Mexico at this nude beach that has sexy vibes. And there was actually a straight couple, there was this big night party

and everyone's in various states of undress. And there was a straight couple there. The guy was rock hard and she was blowing him on the dance floor and I was like, wait, this is actually the future. Yeah, there is really something to that. Wait, also remember when I went to a gay club with four straight people and they all ended up

hooking up and I went home alone. Wait, what? This was actually one of the most humiliating guys in my life. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm just so happy. You really? I remember. And they really is.

I was with, and by the way, I wasn't even that night looking to hook up. I was just sort of like, we were at a comedy show and then there was some party that happened to be at a gay club. And so I was like, oh, this is, I guess I can go to a gay club with for non gay people. Yeah. And to be clear, maybe they identified, you know, maybe they were by like, I don't know, but it was a, it was definitely a male, a man woman couple. Okay. And then a single woman and a single man that were sort of straight presenting and so I was like the odd man out and I was just sort of like okay like this is my home it's a gay bar I can show you around like the way it works is your order drink I was sort of like you know like trying to make them

feel at home they were the only straight people there and then first of all they like swapped girl like the each girl hooked up with the other or like made out at least, not hooked up with the other guy. And then at some point I went to get a drink and came back and the two guys were making out. And I was like, what the hell is going on here? I'm the only one at this table club not getting any action. It was just like the jerk off parties all over it. Yeah, this is the Sam told me that I was exhibiting what's the Seinfeld guy. Oh George. He was like that's something I would have in it. It was a couple like real big stuff. I did. It was one. What was the other one?

When you didn't you were the only person in the friend group that didn't get the like VI. Oh yeah. Yeah. We were invited to our friends. Sorry not to brag. We were invited to our friends film premiere and for whatever reason because of a mix-up I was the only person in the entire friend group who didn't get a VIP ticket. So then I had to sit by myself in the like overflow group. You're watching from close circuit television. I was sort of like I don't know maybe gay representation is not good. That's so funny. That's fucking hilarious, dude.

Yeah, I mean, but I just, I just, to go back, I just really love it, you guys got go on where it's like, you know, a couple will have a beautiful dinner, then split off, suck off, four other guys, and then come back together, watch the sunrise, and kiss on the lips, and talk about how much you love each other. It is true. It's beautiful. Now that we have friends that are even older than us and are sort of like couples that have been together

for a while that are aging, it is interesting to see the dark side of that. Ooh, damn. So you think? Well, I think the dark side, it's person to person. Like if it's gonna be dark, people that are monogamous are also dark-sided in that way. Yeah, but I will say that I'm coming to grips with this kind of thing where another thing

that I don't think I'll have done for the next special I do, but it's an idea I'm really interested in where it's like, it's really kind of pathetic to be an old guy that's still getting pussy. And I guess that applies to getting pussy, I guess, in this term just keeps getting you trying to keep fucking. I sort of agree. I mean, I hate to say it, but no, I don't want to, I don't want to be Aegis. But there is, but there is like a shirt,

there's an archetype of an older gay guy who is constantly surrounded by young twins. Yes, and I'm talking about the straight version that's actually an art of the Caprio. Exactly. Like that kind of shit, where it's like, Leo gets a pass because he's the fucking man. He's so good at acting and shit.

But if you're not that guy, you don't get no fuck. If you're a guy who's a fucking finance guy that's still getting pussy or even just a low tier stand up comedian, like basically if I'm in my 50s and I'm still trying to fuck 25 year old. No, it's a problem. There's a reason why it's like look down and up on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and it's not even like the Grumer shit. It's the you're a loser shit. Yeah, it's a your immature

So I could so that I mean I'm very sure to hear you say that about because it's almost like a couple that's still Trying to fuck I could see the dark side kind of creeping in I like wish I'm like I'm like wish, I'm like, oh. Yeah. Oh, I thought, oh, I thought, no. So I know, well, okay. I think it's more like, I mean, basically Sam is right that any couple that has been together for 30 years like will have a sort of, I don't know,

there's a sort of like, you run out of things to do and think you talk about and you are like sort of, there's so much resentment and whatever, it's almost like open it up then. Right, but I think what it is is like, when straight couples are monogamous, then at least they have to look at their problems in the face because they're not getting anything else from elsewhere, so they're like, we are unhappy.

I look at you and I want to kill you. Whereas I think often what happens with gay men is that it's sort of like because they are so sexually liberated and because if they're sexually frustrated at home, they can easily go and fuck whoever else they want. Which again, I think is good. Go to the park, get an ice cream cone, get your mix sucked. But I think a nice afternoon. I think for some people, then it's like suddenly 20 years passing, you're like, wait, when did I stop loving you? I didn't even, I didn't even, I didn't even, no I think a lot of gay couples, like that is how they break up. Yeah, they're just like, just so we are more like friends now.

Well, I also think a lot of gay couples literally will, just like straight couples will stop having sex but will like not necessarily realize it because they're having sex with other people. So you know, like they're so of it, but they're like, wait, when was the're having sex with other people. So you don't like their celibate, but they're like, wait, when was the last thing we had sex? Three years ago? Like 100%.

That's awesome. It's so sort of like, that's the way to not have sex with your husband, though, is to be honest, because it's like you've been fucking so many other people. It's a lot better than getting no pussy. I mean, like, it's a new kind of depressing.

It hasn't been yet captured by like, Sundance movies. Of course, whatever's working on it. Yeah, we're working on it. Look out there, I believe in you. I'm believing you. Oh, very interesting. Yeah, I guess what it comes down to is that humans really can never be happy.

Anyway, you slice it. I really is, Trill. You know, there's gonna be change no matter what. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I'm looking forward to not wanting to fuck. Like, it's ruined so much of my life. No, horniness is debilitating. Absolutely.

And especially, maybe you don't feel as weak as we're Greek and we have more, we're more hornious a race. Oh, yeah. That's what we're getting to race science. But it's like, I truly, truly am just like, the days I've ruined getting pussy. And the next, I'm like, I know I have, truly, I'm just like, the days I've ruined getting pussy. And then next, I know I have something important, but I'm staying up till three to set my hard,

fuck a girl I don't even like, or I'm that attracted to, why am I doing it? Like I'll be getting blown and be like, stop, go home! And it's just like, you have no power anymore, Brain. You know what I mean? It's like overriddenidden and I'm just like, the idea of being like, I really think my beautiful final form is a fat grandpa.

Just fat is shit. Dying pretty young. Let's be honest. I'm gonna keep eating. Like, once I stop getting pussy, you know how fat I'm gonna fucking get. Like, this is me trying to keep it together. When I give up, I'm gonna be awesome.

Dude, I'm gonna be, I'm gonna have an awesome chair. I'm gonna be fucking baking. I'm gonna be awesome dude I'm gonna be I'm gonna be awesome chair I'm gonna be fucking mate baking I'm gonna be whittling and my dick will not have worked in the decade That's what I'll be happy. I don't really like always horny. It's not like doesn't that knock away Not the way not the way we are like you know what I mean? It's like I don't think you're I don't think we're gonna be as horny as we are now Grandpas grandpa's aren't that horny. Well, there is this for a stereotype of of the dirty grandpa the perfect grand but I think that's because he wasn't getting pussy for 20 I'm talking about you they have to get it out. There's this I think you have to hang up your yeah Retire yeah, I want to hang my jersey my getting pussy jersey up and just fucking enjoy the rest of my life I like get married and have kids the old like the older I get I'm like I kind of do. Like, I don't know about kids,

but I do think I absolutely wanna like settle down in some kind of, you know, I at least wanna give a, like I was in a relationship, that ended, and I've just been, you know, not even, I've had no semblance of a serious relationship, and then what happened to me last year is I was dating a lot of people, just kind of whatever casually, and, you know, when you do that, it's like,

girls, it's almost like this rotating door of people who pop it in out of your life. Girls get boyfriends, you're like, thank you. Thank you for this. You're really sure it must be so jealous. It's just like, it's kind of like listening and being like, fuck. Well, I, well, no, because there's heartbreak here because like, then, and then it's like, then then one girl broke up with me. And most of the time, girls would be like, hey, then, because there's heartbreak here, because then, and then it's like, then then one girl broke up with me, and most of the time girls would be like,

hey, you know, just wanna let you know I won't be like putting in my evils next month, like that kind of vibe. And usually it's like great, had a great time, thanks, whatever. But then I realized like, fuck, wait, I actually loved this one girl. And it was like, and now she's gone,

and I'm trying real hard, and I took her super for granted, and she's in a relationship, and then it's like, you now she's gone and I'm trying real hard and I took her super for granted and she's in a relationship and then it's like you fucking creep on social media like the guy's a fucking loser. You know what I mean? And so I've kind of been going through this shit where I'm like, fuck dude,

like I'm just been heartbroken off a relationship. I never had that was my fault that it didn't happen. So you really feel like, what am I even sad about? I mistreated someone and now I'm sad about it. Like you feel like an asshole. That's so like cinematic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I feel that way. I just feel like shit.

This is sort of the issue that I have with poly people where it's like, they think they have created some equation so that you can never be hurt or have whatever. And it's like, no actually the secret to all of this is you can be a sexually liberated as you want, but you have to know that at any given time, there is a chance there's gonna be like an imbalance in how you can feel about one another.

Yeah, and I think, I mean, I think like any polyperson who actually makes it work is like, no, I am, I'm not thrilled my girlfriend's on a date shouldn't plow, but I realize like, hey, that's part of life. You have jealousy. But I'm just the way I'm jealous. And so, but the way monogamous couples are jealous, if they flirt, I'm a little jealous of,

they're getting dicked down. Then I fucking, I get over it kind of thing. So anyway, I guess the point I was making is like, that moment where I was like, oh, even if I've been kind of deluding myself into thinking, I don't want anything serious. It's like you'll develop those feelings for somebody when you meet somebody and it's like, you know, not to get a little therapy with it. It's like, that's always my shit.

It's like, I'm scared of that. I always pretend anytime anything gets serious. I always try and fuck it up. I think I'm scared of commitment. Bad mom and, you know, bad fucking parents. Parents had a bad relationship. So classic.

Class, it's really hacked. That's the thing is, it's the most like, it's the most like, I can't commit to, you know, even when the girls are, oh fuck, I forgot to do the joke that week. And I wrote a joke, sorry, I'm all over the place. I have a joke about how it's just like, why I'm the one not committing?

It's like, come on. You know, it's like these girls that, anyway, whatever. It really is so, so classic and so cliche of like, yeah, I mean, sadly, most of our problems are cliche. I always, always, always, I mean, so much of our existence. Yeah. Like every time we're, we are gay guys, I'm like, damn, we are gay guys.

Yeah, we're being gay. Sam loves being like, it's like, there would be like four of us at brunch and he's like, we are being are gay guys. Yeah, we're being gay now. Sam loves being like, it's like there'll be like four of us at brunch and he's like, we are being such gay guys. Which even though it's a gay guy thing, it's absolutely like, there's no way to avoid it. Absolutely. Get the Charlie XCX going.

No, you mean? Yeah, it's never turned off. I would say it's sort of lucky to have cliche like quote, unquote mental health problems because guess what, the people that have interesting ones are way more about that. Yeah, they're like, that's somewhere right now. I can really watch like the most mainstream movie and be like, so true.

Yeah. Yeah. I know it really is. And that's truly what I want. Just is a sitcom life. I'm a fat charismatic man. Give me a much too hot wife. Let me live with one of her wacky relatives

and my best friend will be next door. That sounds kind of awesome to me. You know, I do sort of think your current life could be a great set. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I run a podcast studio out of my bedroom with my Albanian best friend.

Yeah. Yeah. Which would only make sense for like great audiences. Yeah. They're like, they're so different. How could they be friends? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, this is not like a regular ass life, but anyway. So yeah, I think I want to have that kind of. The kids thing, it's like, I guess it depends on whoever I end up with, I could take it and leave it. I'll be a great, I think my destiny there is all, I'll be an awesome uncle.

Like, I'm a fucking sick uncle. But, I'd like, I mean, I'm not against having kids. My one thing that I've said before is like, if we do have a kid, if I do have a kid, it's like, I also feel like I should adopt the kid and just zero it out. I think you really shouldn't have kids. I think like, you gotta go, you gotta leave it,

you gotta leave the world. I mean, yeah, more at least speaking, it's indefensible. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. But then the older I get, I'm also like, oh yeah, but I get why everyone does it. Of course.

You're whole being is telling you to do it and that you're a piece of shit if you don't. You've wasted hundreds of thousands of people raw-dogging in succession to bring you here You're gonna end it the one who's the easiest in the world to have kids like those motherfuckers survive wars fam And all that kind of shit and I'm just like, well, I think it's wrong I don't know what about you guys you guys want to have that dark gay Realization in your 60s that you don't love your husband anymore

realization in your 60s that you don't love your husband anymore. Because you've been getting so much. That's the goal. No, I feel like I always pretend like I'm above it. I like to be that metropolitan gay guy. Of course. What's even the point of marriage? Every day I wake up and I choose to be with my boyfriend. In the moment we don't want to be together, well, we won't be together.

Yeah. I don't need the law to tell me what I am. I'm not gonna lie. Yeah. Whereas I feel like I am being as sort of assimilation knee as possible, but at every turn, like being ironic about it and make jokes about it. Like we have a framed Old New York magazine cover

in our bathroom that where the cover line is, when did Gays get so straight? And it's like, from like 1995, and it's like, some article about how gay men are like becoming more respectable now as you're sick. And the cover is two gay guys like drinking out of a pink smoothie together. Or I don't know. Yeah, I feel like the, yeah, you sort of have to do the thing that you're scared of and then just like wink. And then it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd say George is less afraid of the traditional

than me. Yeah. Which is, good Greek boy. Raised it, raised in the church. I mean, I do think ultimately, I don't know if you feel this way, but like as much as I tried to escape it, the Greek vow, like just like- Out of control, with the most physical yanny. Yeah, yeah I just it's it's how I yeah.

I know what you mean fully it's like that's another scary thing about like you know everyone tells you just wait till you get old or you know you'll and it's like especially the Greek shit and the family shit in particular where I'm like you know my best friend just had a kid and it's like whole like that was a huge moment where I'm like damn my, my mother, like my guys, my guys are having kids, like, and now, and now the, yeah, I can't get a job. She wasn't invited to the jerk off station,

or, but, like, I'm just like, damn, the people I care about are having kids. I'm gonna care about that kid. And then it's always like, my brothers are probably gonna, my brothers are both married, my brothers are both married, my cousin's getting married in Greece this, like it's kinda like, I'm realizing I'm just being dragged to all that stuff by like I'm not cool.

I always thought the same thing. I'm a fucking cool progressive fucking guy. I don't need any of that shit. And then it's like no, you're a fucking late blooming coward. Who has to see everyone else do it. And see the day are fine. And then you're like, oh, I guess I can do it too now. Because then what's the other options?

Be a guy with hair plugs trying to fuck the hostess of a sushi restaurant. I don't want to be that guy. You know what I mean? I want to fucking, and you know, so, yeah, I guess I'm definitely going through that crisis, but I will say the other element is like, I do want a connection to Greek stuff.

The older I get, the more I feel like a, like what we said earlier with the podcast started, it's like, it scares me to think that like in two generations I'll have someone in my bloodline will be named Dylan. Do you know what I mean? No, this is like, like that shit fucking scares me, dude. No, I'm named my son like, so karate.

I'm named him like, I'm literally named him the Onisi. I'm named him Dionysus. Like he's getting, my kids are getting Greek ass names if I have kids without question. No, no, I have to say. And they're learning Greek. They're going to fucking Greek school. Like I've got, that is in me, dude, fully.

It's kind of crazy. I never expected that, but it's there. No, I feel completely this I mean, I'm like, I also know now, I mean, you know, who knows what will happen in the future, but like I've been in a relationship for over three years. I probably we will be together, you know, for the long haul. And he's not Greek. And I'm not attached to Socrates, but I at least want it to be like a name that could be Greek.

I think even just like John, like Yanis, fine. That's good. We got a Yanis in the zone. But I am like, no, I'm gonna speak to the kids in Greek when they're just with me, and then we can speak to them in English. No, I'm literally thinking about this. I'm brushing up on my Greek.

Like I'm going to get more, because I'm fluent, but I never speak it, unless I'm in Greece. And it's just like, it's this weird shit where you're like, and even, I'll be honest, I'm even like, it's like, and you don't control any of it, because I'll see, I'm just getting more trying the honest, I'm even like, it's like, and you don't control any of it, because I'll see, I find myself getting more attractive at the girls that I'm just like,

those are like curly hair, fucking schnauz. You know what I'm saying? Like, tan, like, I find myself being like, damn, I wanna fuck those girls more. And it's like, on a fuck, I'm an animal. I'm a pure Greek animal. When I go back to Greece and I look at Greek men, I'm like, wait, I could not.

I would be like, taking my pants off of the fridge. Yeah. Do you feel let's say we're about Michigan? Yeah. I know. It's not even really good. Well, honestly, okay, this is kind of sad. I think I do.

There's something when someone looks like a suburban father. I'm always like, give me give me give me yeah, yeah, yeah, so maybe it's just yeah, that makes sense. I mean, when you were saying you want like the sitcom life, I was like, yeah, I want that to accept I'm the little white. I think you can get that pal. I believe in you. I think you can get that pal. I believe in you. Yeah, no, that shit is fucking wild, but I don't know. That is the dream life. I want to spend a little more time in Greece and just have that be there like a few months

and shit. Are your siblings and stuff? Are they here? They're not in Greece. So one is in fact in New York, which is she moved here recently. That's not exciting. And the other one lives in Munich in Germany. Oh, wow. And then I mean, at this point, even my, I guess most of my cousins are in Greece. But I mean, you know, when we go back for Christmas or something, no matter where everyone is,

people congregate there. So it says, though, they are there. But do you like everyone in the fam? Yeah, I do. I mean, I don't know it's tough because of the gait thing honestly, but not because anyone's homophobic because it's because of like the silence or like there's it's very strange like it really like no one in my family is homophobic. No one when I was growing up, no one sent anything homophobic, but there is something where like I sort of when I hadn't decided how I was gonna up, no one sent anything homophobic. But there is something where like, I sort of when I hadn't decided how I was gonna deal with telling people, I sort of like disappeared from the extended family for like seven years.

And then like reappeared, gayer. I reappeared, never came out to anyone, but it's sort of like, yes, at this point everyone, people have like talked and people know. but it's not really exactly addressed. And so I don't know, it's like, but I mean, you know, but with like my parents and my sisters, it's normal with my cousins, it's not, well, it's fine, but there's a pretty normal, like, yeah, I feel like this kind of helped my experience. Totally.

I mean, I do think that's normal for many people that live in, yeah, like the South or the Midwest or whatever, but just a quiet acceptance. There's like, there's that pause where it's like, everyone's like excited, like, how's Mark, how's Sarah, and how is she for you? Like that's the moment that I think is kind of weird, but like everyone, nobody really gives a fuck. Yeah.

You could see their expression change when they're going down the chain and they even spot you. They're like, how am I going to get out of this? You know, I'm going to get out of asking when you're... Well, it's also like, the gay thing is the first thing. Then it's like, I'm the only person in my entire family who is like a doctor engineer. Like, you know what I'm saying?

You got the defective gay genes. Exactly. Yeah. I'm trying. I'm trying to make sure that they're thinking about cocking. You make sense. You got the you got the defective gay jeans exactly They've taken about cock about doing equations whole No, but I love going back yeah, and but that's nice you get along with your family like you don't have any of those Oh Oh, no, my new look. Yeah, like my mom and dad are great Like, you know, they like love my boyfriend and they have we've gone a vacation with him and then your grandfather would have been through these Jew exactly Yeah, by the way, I wasn't out to so it's very funny for my mom to be like you would have loved that you were Jewish Maybe I would have softened the bloat

George's gay I'm gonna blow to your grandfather. I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna blow to your grandfather. I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna blow to your grandfather. I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that.

Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that.

Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I'm gonna cancel that. Hey, I I feel like that's half the gay guys in New York is like, yeah, they got the traumatic Leaving here and like, you know a drag queen adopted them But it was I mean like that that was probably more Motivation yeah, yeah, like it was sort of like I need to be away from everyone for a while Yeah, it really is that sort of like from the ages of 18 to 25, let's say,

you actually need to not, you do need to escape. And then you can sort of like return on your own terms. That's interesting. I feel like that was my experience. It's like, huh. And it wasn't even anyone else's fault. Like, but I think it's so jarring being different and feeling like you have to explain that to people.

Like, let me figure it out first on my own. Right, right. And then I'll come back and then I'll be confident enough that it won't hurt me if you say something or what. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We were right. And we were right. No, I truly know regrets.

I was also like extremely brash. Like I was just sort of like, you guys don't get me and that's fine because I'm a genius So stupid yeah, it also took me forever to come out to my parents and just like a way that was like Like grow up like it was like what'd you do? I just like literally it was like 25 when I came out Oh wow and they like get it over with They like finish the interpretive dance. They you've been planning or whatever. Well, I actually literally sounded like that.

Like I was like, so I know you guys know. And it's like, can I just not be a bitch for like, yeah, it was like, yeah. Just be, just truly go through this emotionally difficult moment that's important in your life. No, literally being a bitch. Yeah, I'm sure I thought,

what are you gonna do? There is nothing worse than coming out to your bed. Like I know this, obviously this is a plot of many films. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's just like the idea that both Sam and I had to literally sit our parents down and tell them we're gay is instant. Yeah, that's crazy. That's crazy.

It's so humiliating. Yeah. So I think so, the, because it does feel like, at least I feel like there is a bit of a movement or at least like as more people that don't give a fuck, have kids that they're, I have heard more and more stories of someone trying

and the parent being like, come on, we got it, it's all good. Yeah. So you think that's good? That's like a nice little, that's like a nice little, that's like a nice, yeah. It's better. It's obviously better in the long run.

It's our part of me that's like old and bitter. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, suffer a four. If I paid my student loans, no, not true. No, no, no rescue for you like that, why? What? Yeah, and also like, I mean, I guess it's the same with any subculture, but it's like,

if gay culture is mainstream, then that sort of takes away from like the excitement of like, That's why people are sucking each other off on the dance floor now. It's true. You gotta keep up in the andy. They gotta stay sub. It's true.

And I do, you know what, that makes me actually feel way better about it. Yeah, I'm gonna do it soon. Yeah, you got, it's either that or bros the moon Broce has the power to turn back time Fuck Fuck I feel like I had a follow up. Oh, that's an interesting idea because I Fuck, I felt like I had a follow-up. Oh, that's an interesting idea because I,

what you're saying about just having to disappear, I kind of naturally did that, but because I hated my family at the time. Oh, really? For other reasons, right? Like it's like, you know, they, it was just like, I mean, this is, please do not even think I'm being like, you know,

come out of the closet's heart, but I had to sit down and tell my parents, I was a comedian. That's, you know what I mean, but I know it. But on an immigrant level, there was like, I was the smart one in my family. I went to school on scholarship.

My dad was a fucking dumbass who had run up debts who was like, pinning all his hopes on me becoming a lawyer or something. And I was just like, oh yeah, I'm not doing any of that. And everything you thought was gonna happen. My life is gonna be completely different. I'm gonna go, you yeah, I'm not doing any of that. And everything you thought was gonna happen, my life is gonna be completely different. I'm gonna go, I live with some friends. That's also not a great thing to do.

You usually move home until you get married essentially. Oh yeah, living with her, man, it's like being a drug addict. They don't understand it. Yeah, yeah, truly, truly. They're like, what? You're gonna, like, even in college, I went to a school that got me a scholarship. So I would be like, well yeah, they're paying for the dorm.

So it would be like, I wouldn't have to have that conversation with my parents. And then, I lived with some friends. I moved back home to save money because I just fucking had to for a while, but then I moved back out. And except for that year where I lived at home, it was like, I am in college, I'm with my friends,

I'm having, and then I moved in for a year to save money, got a place in Baltimore, and then I just fucking went to New York. And when I didn't live with my family from those years, from the years like 18 to 20, I think I moved to New York when I was 26, I literally, I didn't see my parents, I talked to my mom more now that I live in New York,

I see her more now that I live in New York, I see her more now that I live in New York than when I had roommates in Baltimore when I was an open-micro doing fucking, you know, driving to DC, because I felt like I was like, all this immigrant guilt is such a fucking like, they really, it just, it controls every part of your thought that I was like, I can't be around these fucking people,

I have to decide what I actually truly want. And now I'm, you know, and I went to therapy all this kind of shit. I have a good relationship almost to everybody but my dad and my family now. And, but yeah, I went through that same thing. So, I think that the face similar oppression, I guess. Yeah, I'm just what I'm getting at.

I'm really good. You can say that, guess. Yeah. And I have been. I'm way ahead of you on that one. No, the immigrant, unlearning the immigrant stuff is actually in many ways like shape my life more than being. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That shit is fucking tough. Yeah, there is. And also the whole thing of disappearing and coming back is like, okay, you know in your heart that you like will do something in comedy, but they can't see that yet. So you're like, well, I will at least like get to point A so that they can at least see that this is something. I will give my mom a lot of credit.

She, because she, I don't know if your mom's like this, my mom thought I was the smartest little boy of all time. Like Greek moms, just fucking fully. And I was first born, first born after that, they took them like 10 years to have a kid. So I was like the fucking gold. And I was like very precocious. Like I was the kind of kid that speaks full sense

is at nine years old. Like I was this cute little infant who literally was saying dropping Fs by the way. As a kid I was like a baby that was cursing like being hilarious and just like you know saying you're like you're gonna make a great lawyer. And my cousin came to visit from Greece and just taught me every every fucking percentage there was like an eight year old with this little one year old. It's just whispering push telling me how to say pussy in Greek.

And so I think she thought I was wasting my talents doing comedy. And then the year I lived with them, I was a paralegal, worst paralegal in the world. I didn't do shit. I literally did not, there was one day where I listened to an eight hour podcast about the Roman Empire at work

Like a full eight hour podcast instead of doing and literally nothing And but I was I was government worker. Yeah, yeah Well, they were a foreclosure law firm. So I was like I'm not helping them and we'll see how long it takes me an act I was I'm Robin Hood and we'll see how long it takes. Oh, you're a man, act. I was, I'm Robin Hood. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. You're a hero. But she saw that I would wake up, as much as I didn't give a fuck about this job, I would go, I would get it, go to 6am, I would drive home, eat dinner in a half hour, I was shovel-footing my mouth, and drive straight to DC to do open mics.

And she was like, oh, he's not just getting high and hanging out with his friends. And like, like, I was actually, and so she, once she saw that I was working hard, even though it was something she didn't give a fuck about, she turned the corner. Where's my dad? It was just like, what?

I can't make money. You gotta fucking pay off the debt. I've been going to vacation. I've been taking out loans to go on vacation. I need you to make money fast. Like, he just thought your children owed you, like, well, that is, well, not just owed you, but like I don't know if your parents were like this,

but there was a sort of vibe as though kids are like, it's like you invest in your kids and then you see a payout. Yes, exactly, fully. And by the way, my dad was not tending to the investment. He wasn't like, I didn't really, but I could get a lot of support. But you know, what are you gonna do, Greek? So you like both, that's a rare to get an immigrant's

loves both their parents. I mean, it took, I mean, listen, like, again, as I was saying before, it's like the importance of family was drilled into me to the point where I'm only now, I would say, in the past five years really like prioritizing them and like taking time off work to go see them and like they came over for Thanksgiving which they had not been back to the States and like I don't even know how long.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, but yeah, it's all part of, I don't know, it's crazy. I mean, I have after not going to church for like 15 years, I have now been to church for Easter for the past three years, which is insane, like, and not something I ever expected to do. Easter is fine, though, you can't do this religious. Yeah, exactly, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's, I mean, you're sort of like, well,

what is, you know, what am I replacing those old traditions with, like, what, going to a gay bar? Yeah, yeah, I can do that too. Like like it's not like I found some new like rich culture No, I guess I guess that's my thing. I'm still trying to figure out is like I don't want the church shit involved There's so much other Greek shit to do but yeah going going and lighting the fucking candle on Easter It is literally 15 minutes No, I would never like I'm not sending my kid the fucking later. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I would never... Like, I'm not sending my kid the fucking church. No, no, no, no.

I would never and I don't care about it. Yeah, but it's just still a pretty good church experience. So you got the incense, the fucking stained glass window. We do have the best church. That's the thing, that's the other thing is that I'm sort of like... Even though I'm not religious and I don't care about it, then when it comes to... When I talk like a Catholic person

or something, I'm like, oh please. Yeah, talk to me when you had a great Easter. Yeah, a great Easter. Talk to me when like we let our priests get married so they don't fuck the kids. Oh my God. Like my mom's favorite talking point. It's like, we crushed Catholics on that.

They got no, there's nothing you can come back at us. Our priests get pussy cool, that's fucking cool, and they don't fucking fuck children. Well, it's just like a joke. Even cooler if you ask me. Yeah. Yeah. They can just like have a family and kids

and then go to their job. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I don't know. You religious over there. Oh, God, no, sorry. I'm like, I'm like, yeah, I can't, but I don't know anything that I know.

Well, you weren't really religious. No, I wasn't really. Oh, interesting. What kind of parents are we talking? They're like regular ass motherfuckers. They're regular ass motherfuckers. They're like, like, we went to like an Episcopal church a few times, but we moved a lot.

And I think it just kind of got lazy on like finding a church. And it didn't matter. And Sunday's would have been great. Yeah. Like, yeah, it's crazy to me the idea that my mom was waking up to get us dressed. What the fuck, my Sunday, I mean my dad,

in classic, piece of shit dad fashion, didn't go to church, but told us we had to go every week. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. He was. That is classic, that is. But, but like, my mom was fucking doing all the work. Like, to add my, another errand for me, to send my kids to do something on a Sunday.

Sundays are some of the, Sunday mornings are the best of all time. Better than Saturdays. Without question the morning. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it means more, because that night is sneaking up on you. And you know, Sunday mornings are the last little tidbit of the week. Yeah, the only true part. I tried to go to like, like a youth group thing because it was like you know they made it seem really cool.

Everybody went and it was like oh and they have basketball in the video games. I was like oh I'll check it out. I had no idea I was even gay. We were in a group of like eight guys with a like cool counselor. And today today was amazing So why do you guys think people choose to be gay? And everyone went around and answered and I Was literally like you got a belly full of fucking cool-aid jammers You've just played laser dag laser tag all fucking after doing like, so what's the grossest part about gay people to you?

You're literally being like, well, maybe they're afraid of like getting rejected by girls. That's it. That's so funny because my grandma, when Mike Fuz and finally came out to her, her, and by the way, another hilarious thing is like, if you wait too long to come out to a grandparent, you're gonna have to do it every two weeks.

I'm gonna forget. Yeah. She, her reaction to my cousin marrying a woman was like, I guess she couldn't find the guy. Literally, and she wasn't even mad. She wasn't home a photo about it, but she was just like, I guess she could, first it was like, oh, they're letting girls do that now

was her first thing, And the second was like, I guess she couldn't find a guy. And she's still cool with it, which is kind of weirder than being hateful. It's like kind of more disrespectful. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, oh, this is a failure.

Yeah. Yeah. The things that grandparents will say to like, it's different prejudices that you can even imagine or different like mindsets you can imagine. Like, I think at one point my grandmother thought that I was in dating girls because my like, dick didn't work. And I think she told that to my mom.

And she was like, you know, I'm gonna be respectful. We won't mention it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's getting plowed in his ass because it's dick. Don't work. We all know that's how it goes. Was that one of the answers to the youth group? Maybe their dick still work. They're gonna be like, they're don't work. We all know that's how it goes. Was that one of the answers to the youth group? Was maybe their dick don't work.

They're being like, they're being dick don't work. They're being dick don't work. Could they like hanging out with their guy friends too much? Yeah. I was so much more creeped out by like, when we lived in America, I was so much more creeped out by like,

jingleistic American stuff than I was by religious stuff. Like one time I, I, like, joined, what is it, Cubscauts for like a month. Yeah. And I was like, why are we seeing the national anthem every day? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was like shocking. Oh, that's just like, yeah, yeah. I was like, at least church is based on something. Right, right, right, right, yeah. It's based on an older bullshit thing. Yeah, exactly. A lot of this has been from 3000, 2000 years ago. Well, he was resurrected. Yeah. He is risen. Yeah. Well, this is beautiful. I think we've got a great, the great back. We've,

we've, I've been had such a good time. We've fully gotten your guys background. Let's, let's answer some questions. What do you guys think? Oh my God. Can't wait. You ready to solve some problems? We love giving advice. Yeah. Thank you you I love you this is a great we got our first Greek guest or I don't know fourth and fifth gave a few days long as you're keeping yeah yeah we said we got a spreadsheet believe you you guys are really bailing me out here hit us with it Eldis Tommy baby first off. Thank you for doing the Lord work Every fucking time this happens every episode wow He's running Joe. He got it right right. He got it right once and then I was like part of it was a little sad

But then I don't know why I thought he wouldn't continue to fuck it up So we're back folks if you listen the last week's episode and I'll just did it right. Don't worry. We're back Stobby baby first off. Thank you for doing the lords work Taking calls from us low-life dirt bags and sharing your wisdom with us. You are a saint. Wow. Thank you, pal I come to you today because I know you're a legend in the bedroom Wow, thank you, Pell. I come to you today because I know you're a legend in the bedroom. I'm 38, my wife's 40. She's hitting her sexual peak and it's been fucking awesome because she's always

thirson after the B. However, we aren't that freaky. Other than some good oral both ways and some hard pounding, we don't get too wild. So I'm wondering your advice for stepping up our freaky game a little. Neither of us are interested in butt stuff, and I'm not trying to change my identity to some kind of leather-clad gimp on a leash. But just thinking about leveling up a bit, and having a little more fun in the sack.

Don't get me wrong. The sex has been very good, and we are both having fun. Just want to add a little to the bag of tricks, if you know what I mean. Sure. I know some of the mouth readers you got calling in either don't give you enough info to give any real advice or they've drawn on and on. So I hope I hit the sweet spot for you to be able to impart some of your stage with them. Thanks again, Sob.

Loving the body. Okay, I will just a quick, I like this guy clearly wrote this out. Thank you for taking this seriously, pal. Hit right around a minute. Could you have cut a little in the beginning? Sure. Let's try and stay under a minute. But I pre, yes, I like you, pal.

You're doing a lot better than most of these to use your own terminology, mouth breather. So thank you for taking the call in seriously. I also wanna point out, he sent us that 8.53 AM, which is so tasteful. He woke up, he had his coffee. Well, he had his brush little croissant flakes out of his mustache and he was like,

let me, he read it out loud to himself twice and then he called in, okay, so we've got a man whose his wife is hornier than ever at 40, that sounds pretty cool. And he's struggling, he's struggling to keep up with how much pussy his wife is throwing at him. And he's really struggling with ways to fuck his wife's pussy,

is what it sounds like. He's down for oral and hard pounding, but he wants to switch it up. Interesting. I'm sort of, what I'm not getting is what he actually wants. Like, it's almost like he's like got any ideas for things I could do.

He wants me to tell him how to fuck his wife's pussy. Yeah, so I think there needs to be some brain storming on his part, like sitting down and journaling and being like, okay, what do I want? Like, ideally, let's say nothing was off limits, what would I want to do and then work backwards from there? It's like the artist's way. Yeah.

He needs to be sort of doing his morning painting. Yeah, instead of messaging you, you should have that cup of coffee. And then be like, so what horny thing do I want to do today? That's a great point. The care you clearly put into this voicemail, put into fucking your wife. Think about that.

Think about that. How do you want to fuck her? Because you're right, he doesn't want to go, he doesn't want to be a gimp. He doesn't want to do butt stuff, which, come on man. I know you didn't know who we were having on, but it's kind of offensive. Very offensive.

Also like, you know, you can't, I have to say, you can't start out from a negative place. Like you can't start out with what you don't want to do. Start out with what you do want. Because it feels a little, I know this is cliche to say, but it almost feels a little shame-based. No, you're absolutely correct. So, his voicemail is a lot of shame stuff,

because he's like, we had a good thing going due to the late stage sexuality of women, I have to now fucking a different way. He's being shaken out of his comfort zone. And I think, you're right, I think that's great advice. Don't start from the negative. So you're not into, you know, he's being shaken out of his comfort zone. And I think, you're right, I think that's great advice. Don't start from the negative. So you're not into, you know, what do you wanna do? What do you, what do you,

I mean, if I'm reading into like sort of the subtext of like emailing you or calling you about how to fuck his wife, I might as well just like, cuckold replay. Oh, interesting. I think that would be too much. Yeah, what is the word for a fan? I don't know that I want you in the room,

but you can sit in my living room while she sucks my dick in the studio. That would be fine for me. Because then she's getting her sexual needs met. Yeah. He doesn't have to do the work, but maybe it's still a little turned on by you. Yeah.

By the way, not to sort of stay at the obvious, but also maybe talk to her about what she wants and communicate and come up with ideas together. Yeah. Because she might have fantasies that she's not telling you because she herself is ashamed. Of course. And to get over that shame, I think, you know, something that I saw once at a little vintage store called Spencer's gifts was this dice-like thing to do. Yeah.

And you know what, that does sound stupid, but I bet that would be a little freeing for this guy. I actually bet it would help. I was thinking it would help, because the shame is in your idea of being rejected. It's the dice's idea. Yeah, go to chatGBT and ask it. And I'll just fuck my wife.

It's always really weird. Hell this full of chatGBT. You wouldn't ask. Well, we start doing AI. I fuck my wife. It's always really this full of chat GP Well, I should restart doing AI I see you should just copy and base that question to chat GB Oh, yeah, you need a log in never mind. Oh great. Oh forget it. We don't you know what we're we're in time We're anti AI on this podcast anyway. Yeah, so I don't know. I mean just just if I had to guess a couple things So I don't know, I mean, just if I had to guess a couple things, I mean, the classics, honestly, I love a woman with dumb hair. You throw pink wig or some fucking... Oh sure, like a roll play.

Well, like, that's the very easiest way to do is what you already do, but in a fun little outfit, that's step one, you know? I was even saying maybe like a public place or something, like do it in your car. Or do it in your car Again Do it in a car. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's that's true Balcony You know just a semi-private kind of shit like the smallest stuff is like do what you normally do with a little twist on it

Do a little journaling think about how you want to fuck your wife, and then even maybe literally get some Spencer's, you know, some dice. I mean the classic thing is you don't want to be a gimp, but do you want to? Do she want to be thrown around a little bit? Does she want to be tying up choking? I mean I also think if you're just like I don't want to be a gimp. Then maybe that is what you're so right. I don't want to be a gimp. Then maybe that is what you want to be. You're so right. You're so right. She died so much. Dude buddy, yeah, that's a good point.

Think about what you really want to don't do and then why you're dickest hard while you're thinking about them. And then. You're gonna be a gimp doing butt stuff. What? What? Which sounds kind of fun.

Try it out. I say, yeah, you know what? I've changed my advice fully. Be a Gimp. Do some butt stuff. Which, she's not interested. We endorse that message. Hit us with another one, Big Eld.

Hey, Stavvy. I got a bit of a thing that I've been going through. So about like 15 years ago, I donated my seamen to some close friends of mine and there are two women. They're still together. And we agreed that I would never tell the kid that I'm his dad. And well, I mean, I was cool with that, but now I'm like close with the kid. kid and you know we talk about a lot of struggles that he goes through and him not having a dad and stuff and I'm just wondering if I should tell him I haven't brought this to the mothers yet.

But me first mother fucker wondering if I should I don't think they would be okay with it and I don't want to jeopardize my relationship with That's fucking this kid. I struggle to call him my son because I don't think it's right for me to Say that I didn't I didn't raise I didn't raise them. Well, there you go But I don't know just I just some of them thinking thinking about a lot. Love you guys, love you. All right, later. Okay, pal, let me, before you guys take a crack, sorry, I just got a, no, please. You beat off into a cup 15 years ago

for your friends who raised the child, and now you've had a couple nice chats with them, and you're like, maybe I am his dad. You're, like, I know the feeling and the kids talking about struggling, but it's like, come on, dude, you know the answer to this. It would make you feel good and it would make his mom feel like shit and you would be betraying their trust and the agreement that you had.

It's not like you fucking paid for this little cock suckers college. It's not like you were fucking changing his diapers. You're not doing, you know what I mean? If you start doing some fatherly shit, then I'll leave, then I'll listen. But you popped up, he told you he didn't have a, you know, he's talking about the struggles of not having a dad. By the way, he has two mom, he has a fucking family

and he's getting made fun of it school. And so now you're like, well, maybe this is my opportunity. And, and, for example, who are you? Would you be the kind of dad that would even be good to have? It's like, oh yeah, my dad, my, my, my mom's friend's Tim, who fucking has roommates still. That's my dad. Like, do you have roommates?

Because if you do, don't tell him you're his dad. Let's start there. You got to be successful and do some dad shit for you to even start thinking about this shit. Because finding out some guy who who it does not have a shit together is his dad is not gonna like alleviate everything from a getting bullied perspective. And it might be cool in a short term, but like what happens when his moms are like, you know, scold him for doing something bad and he shows up at the duplex you share with a fucking punk band.

What happens then? Do you know what I'm saying? You're gonna take him in. You're gonna be like, hey, yeah, there's some leftover Chinese you can have, but Eric's got dibs on the fucking general so's though. So anything other than the general so's, you're good. Is that what you're gonna, you're gonna heat up some fucking hot and sour soup to put in this fucking little lunchbox? Are you ready for that motherfucker? Because if not, don't fucking say shit. Anyway, that was just kind of- That was the most worked up I still have. You're like, you're like, anti-darrantant, I mean, really jumped out.

Yeah, that's really, oh, I want two moms. You're like, what errands should be two moms? But I'm sorry, I just, that was my gut, you know, that's my knee jerk reaction. I also to soften it, know where you're coming from. I mean, there is that emotional string and there's probably something kind of innate about somebody who is half your DNA being sad towards you

and you want to comfort him in every way possible. That's something, but you know, you at least have to talk to his mom before you fucking call into this podcast, motherfucker. Yeah, I agree with that. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, and he knows that. He's not gonna say any, you know,

he knows any of these talks. I mean, I sort of have an easy fix, which is just like, re, like reformulate this in your mind. It's like, you're not a dad, you're an uncle. That's right. And an uncle is a valid call for a figure to be.

And like, I, you know, you can have a great relationship with someone that you see as your nephew or as your like friends kid that you are a mentor to in some way. Yeah. Yeah, this obsession over the label of dad is like, yeah, like open your mind totally totally because dad's it should You're not as dad you but you can be a father figure yeah And you're only as dad by a technicality so yeah be be around and also talk to his moms about this shit

They've probably leave me they're thinking about a lot more than you are But you can't let those like little moments weakness that you're feeling, which are totally human and understandable. And by the way, that's nice, dude. Pop it, beat it off. And then 15 years later, you've got a fucking kid you could show John with you. Well, beat it off, period.

Beat it off, period is cool. You can buy that. You can buy that. And it's like, you get a kid to hand you credit life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, yeah, you create life that you don't have to raise. And then you can just fucking get wings and fucking. It's so nice to have your great life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, yeah, you create a life that you don't have to raise and then you can just fucking get wings and fucking. It's so nice to have a good relationship with a kid too

and that you think he's cool. Yeah, it sounds like the vibes are right. All of this is awesome. Just definitely talk to his moms about how you're feeling and you know, find the, and also this does feel like the kind of thing that, don't you feel like you should have some kind of plan around this, like even from his, because to also give you some credit,

at a certain point they're gonna have to tell him something. Yeah, I definitely think it's a little weird to be like, don't ask who your dad is or like, you're gonna wanna know, but it's just normal. It's curious. So yeah, sorry to get so worked up right in the beginning, but I was just imagining you just telling a kid this unplanned and getting mad,

but you're calling in so that you don't do that. So you should have a conversation with them about how they want to handle it, but I also do think it is their decision. Like you, you know, you effectively are just kind of doing them a solid and you got to, like we said, you got to nut. Which is just fucking awesome. Although I wonder, yeah, he donated.

I was wondering if it's one of those cool situations where he gets the fuck one of them. Now, if that was the case, then you definitely can't say. Then he can't say shit. Somebody gave you a pussy, you fucking. But beating off the cup opens up. You know, foot with the door. It opens up some possibilities.

If they gave you pussy though, certainly not you couldn't have. So that's actually their mistake. So for being super, being stint, you know what I changed my mind. Go ahead and tell him. Made you go to a doctor. Didn't you?

All right, well good luck, pal. Don't tell this kid and ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I like, I like, wanna gossip and I wanna be like, I have valuable. Yeah. I like it, but kid was like, I wish I knew who my dad was, I'd be like, seriously, it's me. It's me. I like it, it's me. It's so hard for me to tell them. Yeah, it'd be so many of this kid looks exactly like him too. But that's another element of it where it's like, I don't, yeah, I'd like to think I could keep the secret.

I think you could, George. I think so, but I would like to think that if it's a lesbian couple that you're friends with, and you're still in their lives, there would be some sort of 21st century agreement where everyone, I don't know, like I know a lesbian couple who, I think both their kids have the same dad who's a friend of theirs, and like I was just at their birthday, or what are their birthday parties, and he was there with his boyfriend, and like, I think both our kids have the same dad who's a friend of theirs and like I was just at their birth They are what are their birthday parties and he was there was boyfriend and I Think it's like an open seek or an open thing. You know, it's interesting the them being both gay in my head

Makes it easier. Yeah, where is this guy if he's I just assumed he was straight? It's totally and if I guess that is there's something weird there about ownership of the kid. 100%. The guy coming in to swoop in and just be like, that like as a lesbian couple, you probably extra don't want, which I didn't even think about until you just said that. Well, there was just, first of all, that's the plot of the kids are all right.

That she then like hooks up with her sperm donor. But then also there was a recent, literally like two days ago, there was a new story about how these two lesbian moms, the one of the moms began a relationship with the sperm donor and is and left the wife for him and now that wife doesn't have legal claim to the kid and it's like going through the course. What the fuck? That's crazy. That's some dirty shit on the on the Bible. It's also like part That's crazy that's some dirty shit on the on the buy-on part

It's crazy when something happens that you were like oh this is something that like a straight screenwriter would think up Damn dude holy fuck. Oh this would you ever donate your sperm? I don't think so and this call is pretty much why okay Always be like well damn I want to know the kid. I want to, I don't know. I could do it no problem. Maybe, maybe feels like, I guess if it was like a friend or something who for whatever reason couldn't have kids,

I think I'm out. And they're like, we need to eldest is DNA. Yeah. Or if it was like some shit like friends when Phoebe's brother. Oh, yeah. She has firm or something. I need that pure uncut Albanian that 23 and me the shit They didn't leave this fucking circle. They don't even three mile circle of Albanian till you

That uncut shit we're pure bread. I could dude. I would love I don't even give a fuck I would love to just fucking let my nut off and have a kid that I don't have to raise. And there's no, like in a weird immigrant way, to like, my DNA's out there. Yeah. I drink you fucking Lesbos and the raise and my son. You know what I mean? Like, like in a, oh no, we just pure fucking evolutionary,

like shit. But also I think for you and correct me if I'm wrong, it's almost like you think the lesbians do a better job. Absolutely. Oh, that's the perfect way to lesbians do a better job. Absolutely. Oh, that's the perfect way. You get the guy out of the equation? Absolutely, I would love two moms. I will say I would do it only for a lesbian couple.

Okay, that's fair. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Or actually, no. Or a single gal, a single career gal. Oh, that'd be fun. Yeah, that would be fun. And if you're a single career gal, you got do a gay guy, because I just thought of that. And I was like, she would kinda owe me, please.

She would be like, I would get the fuck every three years as part of the arrangement. Until she got a husband and then ownership transfer to him. Yeah, oh my God. I'm not unreasonable. This is like you being interviewed today is from. It's like Cheryl Sandberg. It's like I'm okay.

Yeah. I get dibs on the pussy of course. Wow. All right, here's with another one, Big Eld. Hey, Stavie. It's your boy here. build. Hey, stop it. It's your boy here. And I've not been drinking because of a January.

I'm thinking about like extending that into the rest of the year. I just don't really feel like, you know, spending the money and all that. But the big thing since I quit drinking is not quit, but you know, kind of quit. I've not been very horny. And I think my girlfriend might be pissed about it. I don't know if you have any solutions or any uh... thought storage uh...

how that sort of thing affects you know your your your sex drive or whatever i would greatly appreciate it uh... thanks once again uh... bye this is the guy this is the guy the lady who called us that her boy friends only freaky when he drinks This is the guy calling him out I mean it's a real thing. Yeah, I know I know I've like heard of this before where people will like Stop drinking and or like stop smoking like it like it can like affect you're like subscribe And I think from what I've heard, it's like bounce back in theory, but you maybe need to like ride it out.

That's really interesting. But I'm not sure. Is it a sex drive thing or is it just like when you're drunk, you get, I guess that's the same thing. But it's like when you're drunk, you get horny because you're drunk. Little drunken feeling. I think it can be a little bit of boat.

That's really, yeah, I would have never thought the sex drive would have gone. Cause I guess I feel like you're inhibitions are lower when you're drunk, but that's because you want it to fuck, but you're sober and you're too much, you're too uptight when you're sober. But it's interesting to say this about for him to say that, cause I wonder what that, huh, no drinking,

you're not horny and you're in a relationship. Cause I've also sometimes heard that the opposite happens where you'll like stop drinking and you're not horny and you're in a relationship. Because I've also said I heard that the opposite happens where you'll stop drinking and you'll be super horny and then there's a phrase for it, but I don't know what it is. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. So let's see, so I think if you think you don't wanna drink, that's great and that's something you've learned about yourself.

And maybe you're not horny because it's not the booze, it's that you're thinking clearly and you're depressed now. That's also could be part of it. That's more of my guess is like, because I know when I get, like when I've done little dry periods, it's to kind of reset my brain. And the reason I've been getting so fucked up

is because I've been ignoring something, or I've been like, oh, I need to get this fucked up to not think about it. And now it's just you face to face with the thing that makes you sad. And when you're sad, you don't really want to fuck. I think that could be part of it. Yeah. And also you're like, you're more in touch with your own body. Like I think before that maybe you were using drinking as a,

or as a way to sort of dissociate a little bit. Yeah. And let her have a good time with that prick while you're just fucking not even, drinking as a way to sort of dissociate a little bit. Yeah. And... Let her have a good time with that prick while you're just fucking not even just thinking about all the, just having to just think, just fucked up off the Jameson's. I'm like, yeah, go crazy. Suck me off. When we're done, I'll get a snack.

Like, maybe that's it. Maybe you don't want to, do you want to fuck your girlfriend? Why don't you want to fuck your girlfriend? Well, also, I would say, I mean this was sent January 18th like in the middle of Dry Jayner. I think like, you gotta, as with any change you have to get used to it first. Of course it makes sense that the first couple of weeks

you're gonna feel different whether it's more or less hornier or whatever. That's a good point. I would say like, I would say wait it out and call Stov back around March 20th. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I would hope by now it would have like evened out a little bit if he sent to it.

Yeah, I wish we would have, we'd know. So call back, give us a fucking update pal. Let us know how it went. Wait, also was this fucked up? Is it like, even if you're not warning, can't you like do stuff to her? Yeah, yeah. Like, I'm with you.

Not feminist or her. Yeah. I mean do stuff to her. Yeah, yeah, I'm with you. Famine us over here. I mean, do stuff to her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true. He's confronting a lot of stuff. Maybe he's not that generous. Maybe he doesn't want to fuck his girlfriend that much. You know, maybe he's been depressed this whole time. You're up against a lot, pal. Because it sounds like without... That's actually a good point. Like, do other things that increase one's horniness. Well you know what's interesting

without his girlfriend in the picture, it seems like things are actually really good for him. He's getting sober. The only thing that's worrying him, I don't think he would even realize he's not, because he's not that horny because his girlfriend is the one who's making him realize something's different.

Whereas if he was just getting sober and going about a shit and feeling, because he's talking about he's feeling better, he's feeling all this shit, he wouldn't even have understood that. He wouldn't even have thought about that if he wasn't in a relationship. Now, if you do love your girlfriend, you want to stay together and it's maybe been a couple,

you're not that horny for the first few weeks, maybe you'll get back, yes, Sam's right. Eat a little pussy, finger pop a little bit. Is that the worst thing in the fucking world? Beat off on her tits. You know, maybe you don't have to have full penetrative intercourse. You're not horny for that, but you can bust a nod off, let one loose, let her bust one too as well.

It's not that hard, man. Oh. You already minimized. You go from like negging to then being like overly empathetic. Like you really change your, tones, which is actually insane Like we're sort of like an evil therapist To be like, jazz lighting his patients Because you also do make really good points and you're yeah extremely kind and you know, fully mocked

That's the secret sauce of the show I tell him what they need to hear You know what though that that's actually very Greek I feel It is absolutely breaking someone down. Yeah. But I love it. It's like exactly what you are. You are a fucking loser. Yeah, yeah.

It's a grandma being like, you're never about to anything, but you're my boy. Yeah. 100%. We got a time cruncher. I know you didn't have a show. Yeah, I think like maybe one more. Do another, let's do another another let's do one more call

And I say I could say I wish I didn't have a show because this is so much come back You got to come back. I would love to come back anytime And before we do last one we get some plugs out of the way of course listen to straight-o lab Follow follow the boys go ahead boys go ahead and by way, Strader Lab is a podcast where every week we talk about a different element of straight culture along with the guests. So it gets brings and sob when we have to. I love you, I love you.

So we're, you know. I honestly, you know, not to, because I listen to the, I'll be on some of sports podcast guy or a movies podcast guy, but when I do want to, like, when I'm tired of the, I just don't listen to the comedian. My own friends, it's weird. But I have thrown straight-o-labs on the rotation. Wow. When I'm like, I'm sick of the other shit, you know,

it's like, let's check in. Let's see. It's very like, we were saying earlier, like, it's not pop culturey and it's not overly personal, so it's truly like... Yeah, you can pop it whenever. Yeah, like in John Hapta, it's not about the news. It's fucking guys, gotta piss.

We're doing 10 more minutes, you fucking piece of shit. I mean, it's unbelievable. That's so funny. One piece of advice, I'll give you, don't hire your dumb ass, that's for you. No, he's actually, I'm only saying kind things while he's gone, but I'm surprised at how good he's gotten at this. He truly had no skills. He worked at some horror.

Sorry, so who set all this up? We hired a guy to set it up. Oh, okay. Yeah, and then elders were supposed to do the wires. Look how that turned out. Yeah, the wires. I've literally never seen that many wires in my life in a room. See, your dynamic is that you just yell at this man?

No, I mean, he's literally my best friend. Like, we've known each other since we were in kindergarten. What was he doing before this? He worked for some, he worked for some dumbass. Like, he worked for CBS to got bought out by something called Odyssey or some shit. But he was working like in media. He was working in the lowest tier of media possible.

Okay. They were like aggregating aggregators. Yeah, you know, I'm familiar. Like, I'm familiar. I can't wait until he gets back to tell you. Whenever the worst award show of all time was on, he'd be like, I can't hang out. I have to see what happened to the CMAs.

We're talking about your old job. Oh, God. Covering like red carpet, it gauges making bullshit galleries. Like any image. Oh, no. No, it's... just like, you know, making bullshit galleries. Like, any images. Oh, no. No, it's, and those will do the best. Of course.

I click on those. I mean, it's crazy. It's crazy what people, because I like for a year to have worked up the New Gawker and like, everything about the most basic celebrities did legitimately 20 times better. It's like anything that was about.

The most well thought out, well-reached piece. I mean, we had like, oh, whatever, yeah. It's sort of crazy. And by the way, I don't think that's bad. And I think like celebrity content is fun. And like, I don't think everything needs to be like making some argument about cancel culture or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which is really important by the way. Yeah, oh, I'm gonna thank God you brought it up. Because it's going too far. It has, yeah. Okay. One of our bread and butter at that job was like, there was a stretch where we wrote like a headline that was like Rebel Wilson Sizzles or shows off like 60-pound weight loss

in sizzling bikini, or something. So that's like classic daily man. Yeah. Sizzles in bikini. Yeah. Yeah. Shows off. We're talking about abs.

Yeah. bikini cloud photo. I love that we would talk about like her showing off her 60 pound weight loss like nine months after it happened. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. headline. Yeah, dude. All right, man. You ready to go you can press a button No problem, bro Daddy, baby my name is Kaz mine from Brooklyn So shit, so my guess Daddy, baby my Kevin for both... for both of our care marlin i got a question for you

uh... uh... piece of advice and look at the look at the marriage advice and i think it's a record so uh... you have been married about uh... ten years now and my wife tells me she's by and uh... you know i'm i'm kind of excited but uh... you know she doesn't do i guess like she's not on the obviously we're not you know monogamous marriage uh... excited, but you know she doesn't do I guess like she's max on it. Obviously we're about you know monogamous marriage

but you know I told her you know I'm over the marriage, but I don't you know I You know monogamous marriage I'm a marriage wait they are but you know they are I told her you don't know for it. Yeah, whatever the For you know, but you know I told her you don't know for it. You know the active jump Thinking about his wife getting pussy Which I respect by the way

So now I'm gonna go for the marriage, but I't, you know, maybe this is my one chance to see Chicago down on the ticket booth, you know? Oh, and so here's my question, is really like, how much should I press the issue? You know, my, my, is my role here. The tower is sort of fulfilled this, as a part of herself. I should address the issue and uh... you know stop out of the way that he was uh... love to see i saw you was coming to your couple times ratio uh... you know we're glad that we've got to see this is so funny because this is like this is like uh...

i'm so sorry to this man who i have to have to have to have to lightly make fun of will take completely seriously but this is like a stereotype of like what a straight man would say if his wife was my- Hi, 100%. Literally thinking about it only in terms of his own experience of like, there's might be much. If his parents go down to another trip.

This is like so sweet. Like he's like so horny. And like, but his wife is still in his fantasy in this crazy way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, oh my god. Well, it is, if you were a guy who wants to stay faithful, and like but his wife is still in his fantasy in this crazy yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I think you could just watch your girlfriend fuck a girl. That would be fucking awesome. I'm interested in it. I don't want to watch my girlfriend fuck a guy. I never, I will never want to do that.

But boy would I watch your fuck a girl. And that is homophobic. Well, it is homophobic. It is homophobic in the book. Where it's like, I literally, I've thought about this, where if my girlfriend fucked a girl, and she didn't want like run away with her, and she was like, she came up to me and like,

confess it, I would be like, s***. Like it's really, I wish I was like not, because that's just like, I know that is literally being like, yeah, it less means I mean, come on. You know, like, it is homophobic, but at the same time, I cannot stop

that my brain works that way. It's literally, it's just- It wouldn't affect me. It wouldn't affect me. Not even just the face, just like, I don't- You're like a dozen count. I'm like, yeah, it's like, it's like, but it's like, I guess what if you really boil down to it,

a guy fucking your girlfriend is like, whoa, somebody was using the pussy that belongs to me. You know what I mean? But it's like, give a girl, like, where if a girl does it, it's like, whoa, that's fucking hot, dude. A hot girl was eating my girlfriend's pussy. We are really like horseshoe-theering back

to like, just how people talk to in like the 90s. You're also literally being like, she did it for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or even if she did, it's like, yeah, that's fucking cool. I mean, I do think, yeah, if you're in a relationship where the guy where the woman is by and potential one looks for that,

and the guy is like, oh, God, I want you to trust. Like, it is sort of the, if that is the case, and you should first of all talk to your wife about this. Sully. And make sure that this is something that both people want, then like, sure, I mean, if both people will get something out of it, I will caution against thinking that, like, quote unquote, women don't count because

next to you know, she will be literally falling in love with her. No, don't get me wrong. I know I'm wrong. Like, I'm not what I'm saying. Like this was a weird moment I had where it was like, when I was in relationship, we were just kind of having a conversation about, because like because I just assumed every girl was by now. Like I just knew after, after 94, every woman just was by.

And then the girl was saying was straight as hell. And I was like, oh, that's weird. I was like, I just kind of thought, the one far from the extra. And then she was like, would you, was she was like, well, you want me to, I was like, I was like, honestly, I thought about, I was like, would you, well, you want me to, I was like, I was like, honestly, I thought about it. I was like, I really, it wouldn't affect me

until she runs off with someone. You know what I mean? But that is the caution here, is that like, buddy, you don't even know that she wants you in the room. You don't even know, you're thinking she's gonna fuck some hot, double D, little ass waste, big, big, you're thinking she's gonna fuck IG models, double D, little ass waste, big, big, you're thinking she's gonna fuck IG models.

You don't know what type of bitches your girl your wife is into. You really don't know. Like she might be into, you know, like a woman that looks like you with a pussy. Is that what you want? Like if a girl was into, like a lot of by girls like me and I've seen them dating women that look a lot like me.

You know what I mean? So it's like that, you might have that style of by wife and is that really what you wanna check out? I would certainly, if you're gonna broach this subject, start off with what do you, wife want rather than like, so I've been thinking. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I made a setender profile for both of us and I've been swiping and, yeah, yeah, yeah. I made a setender profile for both of us. And I've been swiping. And I'm pretending I'm you. And I have a lot of support. I think, yeah, there is such a thing as being too supportive. You know, and I think he is already sort of towing that line. Well, he's completely looking at it from the what I'm getting out of it. Yeah. perspective.

And that is a pitfall. You could be get to make our second friend's reference of the podcast. You could be getting rost here, pal. You might, you might, you know, you might, your wife might run off with her fucking lesbian karate instructor or whatever it was. Or the wife might not, might just like be by, but be happy in a monogamy situation. Exactly. You guys just want to express it. She might want to be, yeah, might just like be by, but be happy in a monogamy situation. You guys just want to express it.

She might want to be, yeah, she might be all thinking about those every once in a while. And not to be all, you know, sort of Twitter brain, so to speak, but it is a sort of classic bifobia one could say. Yes. The thing that bisexual people are more, are like constantly trying to fuck more.

Right. And that they're more promiscuous. Right, right, right. The man are promiscuous. The man. Right. And that they're more promiscuous. Right. Right. Yeah. Gay men are promiscuous. Gay men are promiscuous. Gay men are animals. You have to break up.

Oh man, yeah. You should see, I'm sure the, you look at the fucking, um, fuck. What's the, which the gay island? You guys, fire island. You check out fire island on a Sunday morning. They're coming through with like fire hoses Get out guy knocking people in the fucking head with newspapers scram. Stop fucking each other in the ass We got to clean the streets

Yeah, then you have to go down the streets of Fireland in a calm gondola. It's just like from a fucking boat, skimming. So yeah, just be careful that, yeah, I think that's all of these are valid things. You are a passive, best case scenario, you're a passive passenger on the, my wife eats pussy express. Worst case scenario for you're a passive passenger on my wife eats pussy express.

Worst case scenario for you, the express ain't leaving the fucking station and she's just happy to be monogamous with you and she just wanted to let you know. That's the floor, that's the ceiling. Don't try and hook her up. Don't be like, all right, so, when am I gonna watch you eat pussy?

Because that's not, I think that's the wrong vibe take your cues from her Don't put your own shit in here And she might have created her if she is you know a prude bisexual as you are claiming they exist Which I'm still on the fence on personally, but that's fine different different different. That's why we have different Opinions here. It's where we bring different perspective support The first thing I'm supporting. On the stone stop, he's world. If she's one of these mythical by people that don't want to fuck that much, then she might have made a big mistake

telling him that she is, because now he's not gonna be able to get out of his fucking head. I sort of want to know a little more context about how this came up. Like did she like sit you down in an emotional way like come out to you? She was happy so much.

She's crying and he's like, and he's like, oh fuck yeah. He's imagining her eating carbon electric from 94's pussy. He's like, yeah. While she's crying about how she got, you know, her family disowned her. Ha-ha-ha-ha.

I mean, or maybe she herself, like, brought it up in a sexy way. True, true. You know, maybe they were talking about opening up the relationship and she was like, well, you know, I'm by. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What a simple outlook. It's sort of beautiful.

It just be like, my wife is by awesome. I want to watch her fucking woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it is actually, in many ways, extremely progressive. Yeah. It's like so amazing. It's like, it's sort of the exactly the horseshawha That's how I feel about it exactly where I'm just like yeah, I would love to watch my my wife could fuck as many women as she wanted

It's crazy that it's the odd-boss of women it's the opposite of like a woman reacting to her husband being gay Which is like her worst fear it's like It's really this is very like sort of YouTube sketch circa 2007. Like, wife founding out her husband's gay. Oh no, husband fighting out his wife's gay. Oh god. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That is just something that would still be a biting commentary to me. Yeah. Fuck, dude. Can we get Galker back on? Yeah. Publish that. I don't bring you guys back. Galker 3.

Pivot the video. Yeah. Galker 3 is sketch video back. It to three. If it's a video, and you're gonna talk to three, a sketch video back. It's not a great thing. It's called Schumer. Men be like versus women be like sketch humor. That's awesome. Yeah, this is me and our friend Kevin

share a similar outlook here. All right. So good luck buddy. We're rooting for you. We hope your wife is into you watching her. He pussy and we hope you get to watch her. He pussy and either what we're really hoping is that the relationship keep continues to thrive either way. Yeah. Thank you. Thanks for coming, fellas. Oh, thanks for having

us. So fun. So fun. Come back. Come back whenever. And follow our friends here. Listen to the listen to the podcast. Go get tickets. Stavvy.biz, we're all over the road. And, you know, Eldest hasn't been saying it, but he's, he started, he's gonna, he's tipping his toes on the social media game. Go follow our friend, Eldest. That Eldest Sula, he's got an embarrassing amount of followers right now.

Let's get the boy up, you know. We should, we need a leaderboard of every producer of big podcasts. We need to get you over a certain amount of producers. Cause I can't have my boy in the fucking triple day. I gotta do some competitive market research. We got it, yeah, dude, the, yeah, you're gonna get, we're gonna catch them all.

Thanks folks, we'll see you next week, bye. I have a big family and they're spread around multiple countries. So a few years ago, it was my brother's wedding and most of them decided to come. Great news, but a big problem. Where do you put eight people all with different requirements and keep them all together? We looked at some hotels, but then it was obvious, get an Airbnb. My mom and I were able to find the perfect place. It was a big house with multiple rooms. And in a part of the city with woods and walking trails all around,

the Airbnb also included a huge kitchen where we all got together the day after the wedding for a big family meal. This is a cherished memory for my family and me, and whenever I drive by that location, it always makes me smile. Not long ago, my mum and I stopped by that area to walk around and remember one of the most special times for my family, whether you're traveling with friends or with family for a big wedding or justification, get an Airbnb.