Stone Clearing With Richard Herring - Chapter 96

Episode Date: May 4, 2021

Chapter Ninety Fix - What's the Point in That if You Don't Know What a Cairn is? - It's 7.45am on the 4th May 2021 and the wind she doth blow. Most of the podcast sounds like a washing up bottle full of pebbles being shaken by a toddler, but you might be able to make out Richard's words of wisdom amongst the mayhem. It'll be worth it, because there's an email from a big celebrity. And though your ears will be full of chaos, the field is almost back to its previous state. See in the picture the state of repair to Michael's Cairn.

Stone Clearing with Richard Herring Whoopee! Gus! What's wrong with you guys? Where are we going to go? Good morning! The 4th of May be with you my friends. It's 747.

And we're going to heaven. This is chapter 96. Whoopee's really keen to go to the field today. I can't, she can't wait to see what stones are there today. Who can blame her? Alright sweetie, come on. Sorry for shouting at her earlier on. She just doesn't seem to alert that I need to put the lead on.

She keeps moving her head around. She's crazy, she's distracted by a bird. We're heading up for a duckish passage now. And the difficult spring months begin. Where the crop sheath is growing. And it's hard to get the stones, but luckily there's a few around the edge. Which we should be able to clear. Ah!

It's got pricked by a bush. Ow! It's right in the head. No sign of my nemesis. Recently. But that's not to say he won't come back. Whoopee, come here, we'll let you off for a sec. Whoopee, come here!

What's wrong with you? Why don't you understand what happens from walks? There you go. A couple of stones, a bit of alchemy again of course. A bit of brick work. Very nice. Right, here we go. The crops are coming up nicely. But there's luckily still a lot of stones around here.

I mean, I say luckily. I've been clearing the stones around the edge of the field for practically three years. And it's still full of stones. I'm hoping to get further than the first metre. But I was hoping that would be within the first three years. It just still could be. You've got to keep working. The stones keep growing.

People keep chucking them back on. What can you do? Ah! It's a lovely bird sound in the distance. A couple of nice stones off there. Ah, dear me. Come on, stupid poo poo, if you're so desperate to get out here. What's wrong?

You were the one who couldn't wait to get out here. Now what? So, getting a haircut today, which would be good news. It would help with the stone clearing. I've got to really have unrestricted access to your eyes. Going to seal the stones. It will be running. Actually, you can run on the field.

There will be crazy wolves. It's a windy day, so I hope that won't affect your enjoyment of my wise words too much. And I just get the kids to school. I can't tally. I can't tarry. I will be doing a top right bit of the field. That's what I like to see. When I like to go up there, I might crush the new crops with my heavy gap boots.

And that poo is going to fertilize whatever this plant crop is this year. A very grassy looking crop. I don't think we're going to have the problem with beets that we've experienced. There's a very jaggedy stone there on the park, which is good to get that off for lots of reasons. Anyone jogging barefoot around this field will be mad when I'm here. Nice, cream-colored, oval-y shape. Like an egg, I said egg. I mean, there just seem to be a million stones out here, maybe more.

And when you get to your 96th chapter of your own book, because you might start to think, well, what am I doing? What's the point in all this? The point is to clear all the stones off the field. It's worth reiterating. It seems simple. It seems like obvious that's what you're doing. But sometimes you have to remind yourself.

We're trying to get a lovely, clear silt of just soil. That would be beautiful to go crops in and a wall that's visible from space. It's a very simple, if you're just joining us at chapter 96, a very simple ambition we have for this project. Now, there are a couple of stones off. That's too fewer to clear. And that's the way you've got to look at it. I mean, I look at the ground here, I think it's covered in stones.

What will I do? But then I think every stone that comes off is a fewer stone. It's a couple more fewer. One's gone under the bench, which has been completely cleared, by the way. There's a nice little can of anything under there. Come on. I might get you back on your lead in a sec. Just in case.

It's a cold day out here for May. May the 4th, the 4th of May. That was a nice throw. It just bounced beautifully onto the can in the form of the field. It just isn't looking too bad. Pulls me back on the lead. All this way in the water. Stones as far as the eye can see, Wolfs.

The wind is coming through my ears. I don't know if that's medium or small or large, but it's up the field now, whatever it is. Yeah! It's a bit of an injury now. It's got to be that hole in the wall. And it's almost like a mound. If I'm looking up, you can feel the wind. That's how windy it is.

It's almost pushing me back, but I'm pushing my way through. Look! Oh, that is fast! Who's going to listen to this? I don't know, maybe I should. I'm not going to go. Jesus, Jesus! I'm still picking stones up.

The path there. It's actually the edge of the road that's just on the path. It's starting to ink. I can't miss poking my foot. Right! Right up to the edge. All right, Jesus. Some of these stones I'm picking up on that I've never seen before.

I've got much of a good lesson. That you should make sure you clear the stones from as far from the surface as possible so that you're going up the field entirely. I don't know what I'm going to say, but I don't think this is sabotage. I'll put those back on. Again, they're now very, that can, and we're thinking of a possible here. This is too, the conditions are too dangerous out here. There's a risk going all the way around the field.

So it might be a short podcast today. Try to get some of your many emails. Oh, it's a bit better now. We're not on the edge, aren't we? There we go. I'm just doing a few throws. Oh, there's a nice bit of metal going. I'm going to plow. And that's now off the field.

I'm doing a lot more than I'm doing. I'm not having a little, little sabotage. I hope you're not going to arrive. I'm going to plow the field off. In the main can. It's never been sabotaged again. That's the main can, yeah. I'm tired today.

The kids were troublesome. Oh, that's a long try. What's it going to bounce? It's bounced, it's bounced. Ah, nearly. Given how powerful that is. It's much closer to the edge than it was. And that's all we've been hoping for.

We've got these stones from the middle, across the park. It's on the edge. It's not the guy from the YouTube ad. They're making a difference. Even though it's making a difference. Even if you're just a casual person, you're looking around at the road.

Just help out. You want to make the stone clear. Which you mustn't, whether you're just stone clear, or you're just stone clear, from the other side of the field. I don't know where you're just stone clear. Oh, and this is going to be unlessable.

I don't know if you're listening to this. I'm only an idiot. So that's how we find the weapons. And those should be committed. I don't know if that will ever be here for you. And yeah, the crops at this part of the field are pretty quick already. This is a good place to find stones usually.

But I don't think you'll get us to correct this. It's like a thick carpet of cubic hair hiding the genitalia of another that you're with. Are they? Are they? Are they biologically male or female? We don't know yet. So we can park the ways,

see what's going on, and then we can pick the top of it and bring it to the top. It's kind of lovely stone here. That's a blue thing. I've pasted the cubic hair. And I've found a stone that's the gender of this thing. So is it. The main camera looks like it's something I'm disturbed.

So I think we're OK. Oh, I'm passing some crap. There are all ways in this kind of field. We don't go across the coast often there. I don't know why because it's a bad thing. I don't want to pick that crap because it's medium, medium. That's the way they're at. And they've got a lovely big, thick...

I think that one's chipped us there, so I'm going to take those other siblings down. It's quite hard to manage. You have to have a little bit of weight down. If you're doing it with so big... Fucking hell. I'm not going to stand by where I wish to be. The main thing is that I'm just going to play as it was.

I'm just going to... Oh, lovely! How did you do that to me? I picked the stone because we tasted it. Fortunately, I was happy with that. I stoned them when I was out on the face of the floor. And I put my friend on the side of the stone. That's my throwing thumb.

There was some dog poo on this can. I'm going to cover that up with stone. It's in a bag. I don't know why someone would do that. We'll head up this way to the stone pole. I'm going to keep an eye on the tide. So... That was fine.

We're going to go for 19 minutes. Come on! That was still recording. We can lose this... Yeah, it's fine. It's beautiful. Oh, look at the size of that, baby. I'll just get that without damaging the crux.

Oh! Oh, yeah, that's the biggest of the day. I think we're still just at medium... Medium... Medium, probably, there. Just a little bigger than medium, medium... Maybe medium, medium smaller than medium. That sounds bigger, though, right?

It's a very strange system. Oh, my God! Don't forget to subscribe. If that's your site, don't forget to comment that. Or go to twitch.tv. That's R.K. Herring. If you have any time, you can give us the money every month for free. I mean, that's a crazy system, Rick.

But if you get a badge, you get lots of bonus extras, so... Think about that as you sit in your chair. Oh, there's another nice stone that can reach quite easily from the edge there. This is small, medium, medium, I'd say. It's off the field now, and that's all there is. Now, there's no stone that starts there, you can see it by in the distance. Now, there should be quite a few stones around here,

but I think this is one of the points that was cleared that I haven't really tidied up. Partly thinking I can get some good ammo together quite quickly. Oh, some of these stones are a bit large. So, for a fair stone pole. Oh, no, maybe I've got them back already. Right, we've got five stone bolts for someone around. Let's do this.

One out of one, two out of two, three out of three. Oh, did that hit? I mean, definitely four out of five. I think it might have been five out of five. I think the other one definitely hit the pole next to the stone pole. I'm going to call it four out of five. It's still a good result, but maybe four and a half out of five. You heard a clunk every time, right?

One of the clunks was the pole next to the stone pole, but I think it may have grazed the stone pole. In any case, it's good news. If you could subscribe right now or sub with Twitch or become badger right now, that good luck will be manifested 10 times. So thank you for your support. If you enjoy these podcasts.

If you're learning. It's good to be able to pass the wisdom on to a future generation who aren't even alive yet. That's what I love about this. They could be listening in a thousand years time to this, learning my wisdom. And the ancient Stone Covers who couldn't even read or write or speak, some of them,

they were just so bred for Stone Clearing, their parents didn't even bother to teach them any more than rudimentary words that were necessary, very like for toned. The ditch that popped Brexit, of course, they would have known that phrase, can and unusual. That's some people that we can,

they didn't know what a can was. And that's how bad Stone Clearing education would come in this country. Sure, people would speak and read and write, but what's the point in that? You don't know what a can is. It's worth saying twice, I thought. I haven't gone there, you know.

I've got Alzheimer's, I'm not saying things twice by accident, I was emphasising. I might have a little bit of Alzheimer's, but it's fine for the moment. Right. Back at the main can, I'm adding another, like, comedy nose,

witch's nose, take Stone to the pile, and I'm going to just niff out. That's literally in the field still. I'm not taking a little picture of this, just to fuck me up the arse. The conditions out here are... I think I accidentally stopped

the Broadcast Recycle there, but hopefully... I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. Hopefully...

you can hear me now. That's not it. Let's check. Yeah, it's going well. Zipping along nicely. I'll just check then. Headphones are still connected. If you wouldn't want to hear the inside of my pocket,

I'd want to do all this, would you? No one would listen to that. Oh, yeah, we're all good. It's 8.05, and I'm coming alive. Here come the latest hits. Get it? Frosty's based reminiscence there

for some of the older listeners. Actually looking pretty good down here. The can continues around the corner, and then meets up with the fence. And... I'm just peeping out a little bit now, but it's looking pretty good. So, yeah, oh, it's a bit calmer down this...

one of the nice mini-ken there. Huge stones have forgotten that one. So, the calm after the wind... as we head down... this one... Oh, birds flying by. You know, times like this, it's easy to forget about the troubles

elsewhere in the world. And the luckiest man alive. I get to do a job I love. Sometimes I have to do comedy and stuff to supplement it, but, you know, no one is completely free. And with a dog that I love, not like that. Someone, or just friends. Going home to a family that I'm using as a shield

for my stone-cleaning activities, but who I still care for in a way. They don't know, and they must never know. Passing a thicket of nettle snails. People watch out for that. That's something to watch out for. They can sting you. See, sometimes I think 96 episodes are rich.

Come on, you must have implied all your wisdom by now, and then nettles can sting you. I might have mentioned it before, but it's important to reiterate. But did you just stop Brexit? A couple of nice stones going in there now. They're a satisfying clink of stone against stone as you throw stones into some weeds.

You'll find out that you've put lots of stones in there already. Kicked a little witch's finger or dip into the bracken there. Just coming up to the alphanomic again, and then homeward bound. Getting my hair cut, as I said. That'll be nice. Might go short, might go bald. See how the other half lives.

I'm just about to make my offering to the Omega Gods. They did a good job with those watches. I think they do some vitamin stuff as well, don't they? Feeling that condom or oil or something. Anyway, that's looking pretty good. That one, again, nettles can be your friend. That one is surrounded by nettles. That will stop any stone starzy.

And again, stone starzy will be respectful. Birth, wide birth. And coming down, duck is passive-active the other way. I think someone is looking for renails. Simon Compest, compost. I almost read the name there. Compest will be really good. Simon Compest has been in touch.

To say you're really sorry to hear your recent woes. Well done for bouncing back. Do you advocate the murder of people who throw stones back onto the fields? But I'm not one of those stone clearers. You know, if somebody did that, was lying, suffering in a ditch, and you hadn't done anything about it, you could just walk past and pretend you hadn't spotted them. But at least don't murder anyone.

That's the stone starzy tech tactic. He and nettles. John nettles. Sorry, I misread it. John nettles. That was from Bergerac. He's been in touch to say I was in Bergerac. I think you've emailed him before, John.

I've cleared all the stones on Jersey. They're all round the edge now. I've only done it a bit earlier because it's something the Nazis are getting in. Where do I go now? I'd say Sark. A bit of a Sark. John, it's not as much of a challenge as Jersey. You're getting on a bit.

Why don't we do that? It's a good show. I know you all like it. Not that one. The English whistle. I'm Rebecca. I'm Rebecca. Thanks to the...

They'll be on event pool. It's going clear, but they can't... You know, coming up to 100, maybe something special will happen on number 100. They can't all be high drama. They can't all be high drama. Right. Is that a long enough walk? Well, something doesn't feel like you had a very long walk there.

Well, 23 minutes. Will that be you? No, stand still now, and I'm taking the lead off. Why don't you? Well, thanks for watching. Thanks for listening. And I'll see you next time. On the Old Stone Fields.

The Fourth of Maybe With You. Goodbye. Don't Don't Don't Don't Don't Don't

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Don't Don't Don't Don't Don't Don't Don't Don't listen to the thorns, my friend And they falting, ye a merry dance

Don't listen to the birth and truth Don't listen to your underhand Listen to the thorns, listen to the thorns And they in turn fal living to ye my friend, my fine friend Don't listen to the birth and truth Don't listen to the birth and truth